Chapter Text
Their laughter died down just as Ed realized that he was leading them in the direction of his cottage, without much of a plan. Soon they were at Ed’s front door.
“So, uh, this is me,” Ed said bashfully.
“Oh,” Stede sucked in a breath as his eyes roamed over the front of the cottage. “It’s lovely, Ed.”
“Would you like to see the rest of it?” Anyone else, and this would have been a line, a preamble to some desperate fumbling in the hallway and then a most-likely-mediocre tumble on Ed’s orthopedic mattress. But Ed actually wanted to show Stede what he’d done with the place, how he’d been fixing it up, making it his own. He knew that all of this was uncharted territory for Stede. Hell, it kinda was for him too. His heart had never so forcefully dominated his horny brain. In fact, his heart wasn’t usually even in play. So, he could take it slow, lest he scare Stede off with all his big feelings. A tour, maybe a nightcap, and if that’s all that happened, Ed would still feel like he won the fucking lottery.
Stede nodded, and it took Ed a moment to realize he was saying yes to the question he’d asked. He pulled out his keys and opened the door. He guided Stede into the entryway.
“Living room’s through here,” Ed said, leading the way. “Why don’t you take a seat and I’ll get us some drinks? I’ve got beer, wine, rum…what do ya fancy?”
The only answer was a pained gasp as Ed stepped toward the kitchen. He spun around to find Stede frozen in place, staring at the carefully arranged furniture in his living room. Ed started to panic a bit. Ed was moving too fast, this was too much, Ed was too much. He’d let Stede in and now he’d see exactly how “too much” the new Edward Teach was. Fuckin’ teal velvet all over the place, like some kind of 18th century madman.
“Um, yeah, I know it’s a bit much,” Ed said, rubbing the back of his neck. “Who the fuck needs a fainting couch in this day and age, amiright?”
Stede turned to face him, tears welling in his eyes. “Ed,” he whispered. “Where did you get this?”
“Uh, well…” The flush in Ed’s cheeks burned even brighter at the thought of admitting that he’d taken side-of-the-street furniture like some penniless college student. “Sort of, um. Found it?”
“On Lighthouse Drive,” Stede supplied, matter-of-factly.
Ed furrowed his brows. “Yeah? Yeah, exactly there. How did ya--”
“It’s mine.” Stede said. “Or. Was.”
It shouldn’t have been physically possible, but somehow, Ed’s brows furrowed even deeper. “Yours?” he asked.
Stede had walked over to the sofa and dropped down into the cushions, running a hand over the velvet. “This was the last straw. Why I divorced. I just can’t believe it’s here.”
Drinks mission thoroughly abandoned, Ed eased himself into one of the armchairs across from the sofa. “Sorry, mate, not sure I’m getting it. Connect the dots for me?”
Stede sighed, hand still stroking the velvet sofa. “It was a surprise. An anniversary present for Mary. Or so I said.” He huffed a watery laugh. “Just something to break the monotony, shake things up. Everything about our life just felt so…beige. But she hated it. Said she hated this color and had always said so and what the hell kind of anniversary present is furniture? That it was really a gift for myself, and couldn’t I just admit that already? It only took a couple of hours for us to realize that we weren’t fighting about furniture, but about our entire marriage.”
Ed was speechless. He wanted so desperately to launch himself from the armchair to the sofa and wrap Stede up in a hug. “Fuckin’ hell, mate,” he finally said.
“Quite,” Stede replied. “This was all supposed to come with me.” He waved his hand around, indicating at all the furniture that had made Ed so happy these past few months.
“Then why the hell was it all laid out on your lawn?” Ed asked, his incredulity getting the better of him.
“Bad planning on my part. My wardrobe took up a bit more space than I had anticipated.”
“Your wardrobe?!”
Stede nodded. “Bit of a clotheshorse, I’m afraid. This was all left out to be collected once everything else had been delivered.”
Ed’s mind raced with mental calculations about just how many outfits it would take to displace a sofa, two armchairs, and a fainting couch. He was desperate to see Stede in--and maybe, one day, if he was very lucky, out of--all of them. Instead of voicing this admittedly deranged thought, he said, “Your neighbor said it was all gonna get taken to the dump. I couldn’t stand the thought of that happening.”
Stede sat up straight. “Neighbor? Which side?”
Ed struggled to remember the details. “Dunno,” he said, “On the right, I think? I remember he had a shitty ponytail.”
Bitchy hellfire flashed in Stede’s eyes. A shiver ran down Ed’s spine as he thought about how he never wanted that look turned on him. Or maybe he did, but only under super specific circumstances in his orthopedic bed.
“Nigel,” Stede spat out. “Of course it was him. He feigned ignorance when I asked if he knew what had happened to my furniture. I knew that smarmy fucker was lying.”
“Dickfuck,” Ed said solemnly.
“Indeed.” Stede hummed as he relaxed back into the cushions, running his hand along the arm of the sofa. “Well, I have to say, all things considered, I’m happy to know Lucinda ended up in a good home.”
“Lucinda?”
Stede chuckled. “That’s the name of the line for this particular set. The design was standard but the teal velvet was a custom order. And the chaise, of course. That whole piece had to be custom built.” He patted the arm of the sofa and glanced around, appraising each piece of furniture. “Yes, it appears that Lucinda’s been in excellent hands.” Finally, his eyes landed to meet Ed’s. “Your hands.”
Ed swallowed. Hard. “Yeah, well.” He stood and brought himself to sit beside Stede on the sofa, running a hand over the cushion. “This stuff is special, knew that the minute I laid eyes on it. Had to do some research on how to care for velvet furniture, though. Way different than the leather I used to have.”
“Hmm. Yes, pieces like this do require a delicate touch, don’t they? Lots of fastidious care.”
Ed nodded. “You gotta fluff and flip the cushions regularly, for one thing.” As he gently patted the cushion, his hand landed next to Stede’s, their pinkies touching.
Stede leaned in a bit closer. “You know, you can fix crushed fibres by steaming against the pile,” he said breathily.
“Can’t rub at a spill, gotta blot,” Ed added, an incredibly dignified whimper escaping his throat as he brought his face closer to Stede’s, their lips nearly touching.
“Vacuum with a soft brush for dry messes,” Stede whispered against Ed’s mouth. Then all of a sudden he was tugging at Ed’s shoulders, maneuvering him until Ed found himself straddling Stede’s lap. Stede closed the centimeter of distance that remained between them and was soon writhing beneath Ed as he licked into his mouth.
After a few dizzying minutes, Ed pulled back, panting and resting his forehead against Stede’s. “I was gonna take this slow,” he said with a whine as Stede got a hand in his hair. “If we keep going, we’re gonna…oh fuck…we’re gonna have a very not dry mess to deal with.” He glanced down pointedly where their hips were joined.
“I don’t care,” Stede groaned.
“Well I do, you lunatic! I didn’t go to the trouble of accidentally stealing your fine things just to ruin ‘em.” He kissed Stede’s pouting face, stood up and held out his hand. “Besides, tour’s not over.”
Stede took a steadying breath, nodded, and grasped Ed’s hand. Ed pulled Stede along behind him as he moved through the house. “There’s a kitchen. And a bathroom. And a study,” he rattled off, not actually showing Stede any of the rooms he listed. He stopped at the doorway to his bedroom. .
“And I suppose this is where the magic happens,” Stede said with a smug smile, brow quirking up as he peered inside.
“Yeah, I reckon somethin’ pretty magical could happen in here,” Ed said quietly. “If you’re into that.”
“I’m into it.” Stede draped his arms over Ed’s shoulders. “I’m all in, darling.”
***
Stede was humming to himself as he stared up at the ceiling, fingers tracing along the tattoos on Ed’s arm, which was draped over his chest.
“Stede,” Ed mumbled into his neck. “Is that…are you actually humming ‘It’s a Small World’?”
Stede’s hand froze on Ed’s arm. “Maybe,” he whispered.
Ed cackled, his body rocking against Stede’s. “You are an absolute lunatic,” he said. “I love it.” He pressed a kiss to Stede’s jaw and then nestled his head back down into the crook of Stede’s neck and shoulder, breathing in the scent of him.
“So, I suppose I should --”
“Did you want to --”
Both spoke at the same time, breaking the silence that had settled over them.
“Oh,” Stede said. “Sorry, you go.”
“Oh, nah, that’s okay, you go.”
“No, please,” Stede said, wrapping his arm around Ed’s back and giving a light squeeze. “What were you saying?”
“Did you want to stay the night?” He whispered into Stede’s neck.
Stede breathed out a sigh, sounding incredibly relieved. “I would love that.”
Ed grinned and nestled in even closer, a sated sleepiness washing over him. “Very good. Love that.”
***
Ed woke up alone. For a brief moment, he thought the whole night before had been a dream. But then his brain caught up, and he took in the indentation in the pillow Stede had slept on, the covers on his side neatly folded back. No, Stede hadn’t been a dream (not a literal one, anyway), but he also wasn’t here. Before Ed could spiral too much, he noticed Stede’s clothes folded neatly on top of the dresser (definitely not the state they’d been left in last night) and his robe was missing from the hook on the bathroom door. Ed threw on a pair of boxer briefs and a tshirt and headed out of the bedroom.
Stede was sitting on the fainting couch, the bright fuschia of Ed’s robe complementing the teal velvet fabric. He had his knees tucked up, arms wrapped around them. His golden, sleep mussed hair was shining in the morning sunlight. He was staring out the bay window and hadn’t noticed Ed enter the room. All Ed could think was how much Stede looked like he belonged there. And so he decided to say it.
“You look good there,” Ed said, his voice still a bit rough with sleep.
Stede startled, but smiled widely as he turned to face Ed. “Good morning. I just put the kettle on. I was going to bring you tea.”
Ed walked over and settled on the other end of the fainting couch. Stede was staring out the window again. “Everything alright?”
“Everything’s wonderful, Ed. I’ve just been sitting here thinking how very strange life is. How I ended up here. How my furniture ended up here.” He waggled his brows and gave Ed a cheeky grin. “Just. Strange and wonderful and…I don’t know,” he trailed off with a lopsided smile that highlighted the dimple in his left cheek.
“You should have it back,” Ed said. “The furniture, I mean. I don’t feel right keeping it, knowing what I know now.”
Stede gasped. “Ed, no!” He sounded as if Ed had suggested they go on a kitten-murdering spree or something.
“Why not? I don’t think finders keepers exactly fits these circumstances.”
Stede shook his head. “Even if I wanted to accept your ridiculous offer, and I don’t,” he said emphatically, “My place doesn’t have the space for it.”
“Ah, the sad divorced dad special. Right.”
Stede chuckled. “I don’t live there anymore, as of last week. Guess we were too distracted last night for me to get to this bit: I’m in the apartment above the bookshop.”
“Wait,” Ed said. “So you’re not just running the shop, you’re…you live here?” He knew he must be grinning like an idiot but couldn’t bring himself to care, not with how wildly his heart was racing at the prospect of Stede becoming a regular fixture in his life.
Stede nodded. “Getting rid of the business sort of fully woke me up in a way even coming out hadn’t. My life is fully mine now. Couldn’t stand that sad greige box I was in for another minute. When I was searching for places, the main objective was to be close to the beach. The apartment came up but when I learned it was attached to a bookshop…well, I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to see if I could have both.” He ducked his head sheepishly.
“Nothing wrong with chasing what you want,” Ed said softly. He brought his hand up to cover Stede’s on top of his knee. “Think we’re both learning that.”
“I think you’re right,” Stede said, hesitating for only a moment before suddenly leaning in and pressing a kiss to Ed’s lips. Ed returned the kiss enthusiastically and soon their mouths were each chasing exactly what they wanted.
They only broke apart when the kettle started shrieking in the kitchen. Stede giggled and stood up, offering Ed his hand. “Come on, let’s have some tea. Perhaps we can work out some sort of visitation schedule. For me and the furniture, of course.” He winked.
Within three months, there was a “For Rent” sign in the window of the bookshop apartment, and Stede and Lucinda had been permanently reunited.
