homard_en_plastique
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She sighed internally, disbelief mixing with a dash of delight. This might be the most absurd thing that had ever happened to her, and there was stiff competition for that dubious honor. Surviving the nautiloid crash. Escaping Castle Ravenloft twice. Joining the circus. Becoming a warlock by accident.
And now she was god of the fish people.
Take that, Mystra, she couldn’t help but smirk to herself.
Series
- Part 3 of Love & other Eldritch Horrors
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“Obviously this—” she swept an arm wide in a gesture that probably lost its impact due to the fact she was entirely hidden under a blanket “—happened because I drank that hag potion. Which you explicitly told me not to.”
“I don’t think it would be very considerate of me to say I told you so, in your current state,” Gale replied with equanimity.
“But you’re fine with implying it.”
—
In which a warlock finds out whether it's possible to die of embarrassment.
Series
- Part 2 of Love & other Eldritch Horrors
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She paused as she reached forward to warm her cold hands over the fire. “If I had a gold piece for every time this kind of thing had happened to me I’d have…well, I’d only have two gold pieces. But it is wild that it’s happened twice. Let me tell you, the novelty wears off.”
Gale’s eyes went wide as he coughed out a reply: “Pardon?”
Series
- Part 1 of Love & other Eldritch Horrors
Recent series
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Love & other Eldritch Horrors by homard_en_plastique
Fandom: Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
18 Oct 2025
- Words:
- 51,119
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 1
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“What will it cost me?”
She narrowed her eyes at him.
“You know how pacts work, don’t you? You like to make deals. I will make you a deal. You give me the gloves, and I will give you whatever you like,” he said. The side of her mouth twitched. She did like when he begged. Almost as much as she liked the unnecessary firmness of his hand on hers as he prevented her from completing her task. Her jaw clenched at that thought, and she wrenched her hand away from him.
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In which a cruel and embittered warlock's tale of vengeance is disrupted by tadpoles and distracted by a charming wizard. After initially extorting him with magical items to assist her in a sidequest involving various hags and fey, she learns that she may also have a more efficient way to help with his orb problem. Unfortunately, this grows more complicated by the day, and Gale realizes that the warlock is not as cruel as she would like to be. (Or, Gale likes cats, and I decided to give him one.)
Series
- Part 1 of Quiet Rituals
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 278,053
- Chapters:
- 42/?
- Comments:
- 854
- Kudos:
- 537
- Bookmarks:
- 155
- Hits:
- 24,264
Bookmarked by homard_en_plastique
28 Jun 2024
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this beauty that pleases too well by PouroverPaloma
Fandoms: Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
05 Oct 2025
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He unexpectedly turned as he closed the door and caught Daphne observing him. Their eyes met, she blushed in embarrassment, and—
Every time he smiled, really smiled with his whole face, the world around him seemed to dim in comparison. He made her want to take up painting again. Or pastels, or any of the other art forms she’d left behind when she graduated from RISD and started her first bookmaking apprenticeship. She’d never felt compelled to make representational art, but Gale Dekarios in the full bloom of joy was absolutely worth representing.
In which tiny, remote Icepeak College mysteriously hires a massively overqualified antiquities scholar in the middle of term, and its book arts workshop director finds herself inexorably pulled into his orbit. In her defense, he's really fucking hot.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 120,908
- Chapters:
- 21/25
- Comments:
- 898
- Kudos:
- 554
- Bookmarks:
- 148
- Hits:
- 18,612
Bookmarked by homard_en_plastique
03 Jun 2024
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Summary
Astarion Ancunin works hard on his YouTube channel, sometimes spending weeks on the beautiful fashion films that show off his handcrafted gowns. His audience may be small but he's proud of his content. Which is why it's so godsdamned irritating when the self-named 'Wizard Of Waterdeep' starts posting hideous videos of his endless rambling and gets two million subscribers almost overnight.
Meanwhile, Gale Dekarios is selling his soul to make 'content' (ugh), just to try to get people to love magic again. He hates his channel and he hates himself, so he seeks solace in his favorite corner of the internet: r/galehaters — with his new online BFF, WhiteBat.
~ The fic formerly known as 'You've Got Gale' ~
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 65,464
- Chapters:
- 13/13
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1,382
- Kudos:
- 1,498
- Bookmarks:
- 322
- Hits:
- 21,477
Bookmarked by homard_en_plastique
24 May 2024