221 - 240 of 301 Bookmarks by problemsloth
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It was pretty common knowledge around the mortals that you had to be wary of tradespeople. Not that they were all malicious or anything, but when you lived next door to beings with that much power, it paid to be careful.
The problem is Dave Strider is not very careful.
Series
- Part 1 of the trades of clay and gold
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 35,286
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 231
- Kudos:
- 989
- Bookmarks:
- 214
- Hits:
- 13,378
Bookmarked by problemsloth
09 Apr 2022
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Karkat's a new vampire in need of a thrall. Dave's found the easiest job in the world. And they were roommates ...
Bookmarked by problemsloth
09 Apr 2022
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Bookmarked by problemsloth
22 Mar 2022
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Like a Good Neighbor by orphan_account for nomisupernova
Fandoms: Homestuck, The Muppets - All Media Types
15 Jun 2021
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"I'm Gonzo." The guy said. Dirk watched him start to tremble, his legs kicking out at thin air. He didn't think his new neighbor was going to last much longer, but he really wanted to see how long he could hold out.
"Dirk."
"Hi, Dirk! Say, uh, I hate to bother you but could you help a guy out and pull me up? You look strong, and I'm pretty light! It shouldn't be a problem for a guy like you at all."
"A guy like me, huh?" Dirk mumbled in reply, leaning his head on his hand. He flexed his arms as subtly as he could. "You said I look strong? Just where have you been looking, neighbor?"
"Um." Gonzo swallowed awkwardly, and the way his eyes were searching Dirk's face for a sign of anything to give away if he was serious or not was something Dirk thought he would never get enough of. "Sorry, are you flirting with me?"
"Depends." Dirk shrugged. "Do you think I'm flirting with you?"
"I think I'll be able to think it over better when my feet are on solid ground."
Dirk meets his new neighbor and he is somehow exactly his type
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Bro’s ready for anything his younger, smaller self can dish. Anything except for being softly, tenderly taken apart.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,743
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 8
- Kudos:
- 137
- Bookmarks:
- 17
- Hits:
- 2,361
Bookmarked by problemsloth
15 Mar 2022
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Two omniscient bros with debilitating depression, sitting between realities, five feet apart because we haven't reached that part of the narrative yet. Keep a tight grip on the bridles of your metaphorical horses. I'm working up to it.
(Dirk is tired. Haven't you ever wanted to let someone make the tough choices for you?)
Bookmarked by problemsloth
14 Mar 2022
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Summary
Sixteen years ago he lost his brother.
Thirteen years ago he lost the chance to get to know him again.
Is the third time the charm? Or will it all crash and burn?
- Words:
- 16,883
- Works:
- 6
- Bookmarks:
- 55
Bookmarked by problemsloth
12 Mar 2022
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Dirk and John try pony play.
Bookmarked by problemsloth
06 Mar 2022
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What’s wrong with a little self-insert fanfiction?
Bookmarked by problemsloth
06 Mar 2022
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You've determined the hobbies of the monarch you serve are as follows:
1. Ill-timed pranks.
2. Cooking.
3. Subconsciously pulling elaborate political schemes off perfectly, ad infinitum, every one of which inches his mind closer to some ineffable dark chasm you're curious to find the depth of.Anyway, he makes damn good lasagna.
(although part of a series, this fic is a standalone. feel free to read this first!)
Series
- Part 3 of Catacombs
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 156,428
- Chapters:
- 34/34
- Comments:
- 808
- Kudos:
- 956
- Bookmarks:
- 202
- Hits:
- 21,636
Bookmarked by problemsloth
06 Mar 2022
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dirk and john explore johns bizarre kink
Bookmarked by problemsloth
04 Mar 2022
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As the destruction of the dream bubbles draws near, the ghosts are forced to come to terms with their mortality (again) or else risk dying their second deaths with as much unfinished business left behind as they did the first time.
Or: in which the author (and Karkat) encourage the Beforans to talk about their feelings and sort out their baggage, an eternity too late.
Bookmarked by problemsloth
04 Mar 2022
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As a result of his evolving powers, Bro takes over from Dirk. John decides to keep his mischief contained.
Includes discussion of abuse.
Series
- Part 3 of Olympus
Bookmarked by problemsloth
01 Mar 2022
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shag, emotionally devastate beyond all recognition, kill by artreactor
Fandoms: Homestuck
17 Feb 2022
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Jake remembers that he hates Fanta. TLDR: This causes the ego death of thousands.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 21,376
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 43
- Kudos:
- 202
- Bookmarks:
- 55
- Hits:
- 2,931
Bookmarked by problemsloth
18 Feb 2022
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When a specific episode of Rumble In Da Pumpkin Patch goes dangerously awry, the blame is hard for either Dirk or Jake to place. Is this evidence of a larger problem? Whose problem is it? What the hell even happened? Is this it for our intrepid heroes--I mean our noble--I mean our heroic, I. I mean. Uh. Hm. I see.
An exploratory fic about the fantasies, realities, constructs, and expectations of being Dirk and Jake, and how those same fictions and facts are reflected between them.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,842
- Chapters:
- 1/?
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 4
- Kudos:
- 18
- Bookmarks:
- 4
- Hits:
- 210
Bookmarked by problemsloth
15 Feb 2022
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Summary
Sometimes you need to check up on the tracking devices implemented into your ships to ensure their capabilities to withstand interdimensional space travel and when you pack up your things and race to the edge of the universe for no particular reason whatsoever actually this guy dirk just **happens** to be there!
(also known as "dirk brainwashed jake to be nuts and jake's about to make that everyone's problem")
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,123
- Chapters:
- 3/?
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 21
- Kudos:
- 94
- Bookmarks:
- 17
- Hits:
- 1,162
Bookmarked by problemsloth
15 Feb 2022
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Summary
How the Signless Sufferer won the war for Bro Strider's soul.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,079
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 55
- Kudos:
- 82
- Bookmarks:
- 20
- Hits:
- 1,078
Bookmarked by problemsloth
08 Feb 2022
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Summary
John and Dirk are spare wheels as far as their very coupled off friends are concerned. They get paired off as the only single ones in the group and get close. And then they get married, as a joke, as a fuck you to their friends who want them to settle down and as a way to solidify their beautiful bromance. It's the biggest game of gay chicken you've ever seen. It ends happily ever after.
Series
- Part 1 of Gay Chicken
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 48,023
- Chapters:
- 16/16
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 649
- Kudos:
- 1,451
- Bookmarks:
- 255
- Hits:
- 19,793
Bookmarked by problemsloth
03 Feb 2022
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Summary
Dirk and Karkat both have crushes on John and consider each other rivals. They're like 95% sure John's straight but they're in a competition against each other so choo choo, motherfuckers, they're all on board for the next station now.
Bookmarked by problemsloth
29 Jan 2022
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Summary
Say what you want about trailer trash, but growing up in this environment offers a unique perspective on life.
Or: Dirk Strider grows up in a trailer park, all the while acutely aware of his billionaire older brother that has no idea he exists living two states away.
Bookmarked by problemsloth
26 Jan 2022