Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Sitting alone is always a good hobby. Sitting alone can include many fun and engaging activities such as eating, watching television, and most importantly, sleeping. All things obviously better done while alone.

Robbie Rotten didn't need anyone to fill his home with laughter or conversation, not when he could fill it with the buzz of a TV or the crunch of extra salty potato chips.

And he certainly didn't need any flipping sport elves to keep him company. Not ever. He did just fine without him before they started dating, what difference is there now that they've broken up? He loved being alone, and dammit he'll love it again. He didn't need Sportacus. He never did and he never will. Again.

Robbie's thoughts were interrupted by a soft knocking at his hatch.

His eyebrows knit together in frustration, knowing it was either one of those pesky children come to ruin his wonderful evening, or the elf he didn't want near him.

Well... The elf who didn't Robbie near him.

"What?!" Robbie had decided to yell.

The response was just more soft knocking.

Robbie sighed loudly and pushed himself up out of his seat so he could pace around his lair to think. He didn't want to talk to anyone, especially not the man who just three days ago ended their six month relationship. He didn't even think he could bear to see his face by looking out of the periscope.

Robbie's heart ached at letting his ex-lover waiting outside his lair, but he just... couldn't go to him or talk to him.

Robbie had loved that buffoon, and now here he was, on the verge of tears again as the love of his life stood outside his house, trying to get his attention.

The knock came a bit louder this time, pulling Robbie from his thoughts for the second time this evening.

With wet eyes, he squared his shoulders and spun towards the ladder to the hatch, a spurt of resolve flooding his limbs without his consent. He may as well get this over quickly.

Soon he had found himself at the top, arm reaching up to open the latch. He took one more breath, letting the dark tunnel offer any last minute comfort something like darkness could, and he swung his arm upward.

Standing in front of him in an ugly yellow outfit, arms crossed and a soft yet stubborn expression gracing his mustached faced was a man Robbie had never seen before. He looked familiar though, almost as if Robbie knew a distant relative of his.

"Robbie Rotten?" the man asked.

Arm still outreached behind him, Robbie climbed the last couple of rungs so his torso was completely out of the silo and he was at eye level with the other and he mimicked the stance of the mystery man in front of him. He crossed his arms and leaned back lazily against the curved metal wall behind him.

"Yes?" He responded with what he hoped was a healthy dose of distrust.

The man closed his eyes as if to prepare himself, and then began to speak.

"I am sorry we had to meet like this, Robbie. I am Sportacus's brother. He... he called me a few days ago in a tizzy," he took a steadying breath, trying to find the words he was looking for. Robbie let him take all the time he needed. If he thought Sportacus had a thick accent, this man had an accent so thick it practically created a fog around them. He spoke slowly and carefully, unsure of how to translate his thoughts exactly. English was clearly not this man's first language.

"He told me something about you that bothered him? And he told me he ended things with you? Over this? Is this true?" He ended every sentence as a question, perhaps in disbelief over the situation.

Robbie mouth was hanging slightly open. Sportacus told his brother about him? About what he is? About him being-

"He told you I was a fairy?" he asked with more breathlessness than he had planned.

The man who's name still hadn't been revealed nodded gently and unfolded his arms, fidgeting them slightly at his sides. Robbie blanched thinking about how badly this wasn't about to go. If Sportacus had reacted so poorly over it, he could only imagine how much worse this more muscular and more elvish elf would.

"Yes, he told me about you disclosing this information to him, and how he reacted to it, and... Robbie, I am sorry."

Mouth agape, Robbie was speechless. This was not what he was expecting at all. Why was Sportacus's brother apologizing for his brother dumping him? It's not like it was his fault. People just don't like fairies. Elves included. In fact, elves very included. Elves and fae did not get along, but Robbie had thought that Sportacus was different,

First of all, he thought Sportacus had already known of his fae heritage before they started dating. It's not like he had gone out of his way to hide what he was, and Sportacus was of average intellect. Not to mention an elf of average intellect. Elves can usually sense those things through weak or half-hearted wards. And after they had started dating, he didn't want to keep any part of himself secret, not something like that.

But, as it turned out, Robbie had miscalculated. It didn't happen often, but when it did, his miscalculations usually had drastic outcomes. Not only was Sportacus apparently very distrustful of fae, he would even go so far as to break up with his lover, solely because they were fae. His prejudice went deep. Deeper than Robbie could have dreamed. He simply didn't think to factor that into the equation.

Robbie didn't realize he had been staring silently for a couple minutes until the other man began to talk again.

"You are probably wondering why I am apologizing to you. Ah, well, you see... we did not raise Sportacus like that. At least, we hoped we did not. Our parents were loving to any creature and all species, and we tried to pass that mindset along. But when an elfling is chosen to be a Number, they go into training young. They are raised around other, less open-minded young elflings. He was too impressionable, and though his heart was in the right place, the other adult elves and his young peers really made him feel strongly about some things. Some were very good and made me proud to call him my brother, but this was not one of them.

"We knew about this growing hatred for fairies, and we tried to get him to reconsider what he felt about your kind, but he would not listen. We ultimately decided it was fruitless, but that it should not cause too much damage, if any, in the long run. Elves and fae do not generally live near one another, so the chances of him encountering one were slim at best. We had no idea that any of this would..." He stopped himself again to take a calming breath, having gotten caught up in his recollection, old anger flushing his cheeks.

"Robbie, I am so sorry this happened. We could have tried harder. We did not know. We-"

Robbie tuned the man out as his mind tried to process everything or anything that the other man had said.

Of course Robbie couldn't really care less about what this man was saying. Excuses won't make his broken heart heal any faster. A backstory to prejudices does not forgive them. Robbie was still fae, and therefore still broken up with.

Nothing was different.

"Hey, um..."

"Íþróttaálfurrin." He provided with flushed checks at the obvious complexity of the name.

"Íþróttaálfurrin," Robbie butchered, "Look, I-I appreciate you coming here, but I don't really care." He leaned forward and uncrossed his arms, instead deciding to brace them gently on the silo edge in front of him. "I told Sportacus what I was, and he made a choice. That's all. There's nothing any of us can do about it. So thank you for coming, I guess, but-"

Íþróttaálfurrin held his palm up to stop Robbie from talking anymore, confusion taking over his features. "But you loved him, didn't you?"

The question took Robbie by surprise and left him breathless yet again. Sputtering, he confirmed. "Of-of course I did! We were together for so long, and even before then we knew something was going on between us." He paused, emotion overcoming him. "I loved him for a long time."

Somewhere during his confession, his eyes had drifted towards his hands that had tightened their grip on the metal wall. He forced himself to loosen his fingers and bring his eyes back up to Íþróttaálfurrin's, inviting him to keep talking.

Íþróttaálfurrin's face was softer now, almost like he pitied him. "Do you still love him?"

Robbie's instincts took over while his heart fluttered at the thought of his love for the other man, and he suddenly scoffed out a hoarse, "Unfortunately."

Íþróttaálfurrin took the last couple of steps over to Robbie and put his hand on his shoulder. His blue eyes wet with fresh yet unshed tears. Another steadying breath passed the man's lips and he said, "Sportacus is confused right now, but," he tightened his grip on Robbie, "he loves you, too."

"Don't patronize me," was Robbies automatic response. "You don't come to my house and whisper those words at me." His voice was soft and began to shake. "Don't you dare."

"Robbie," Íþróttaálfurrin said in an accent all too similar and much too painful. That's what finally broke him. Robbie felt hot tears spilling down his cheeks. Suddenly, strong arms were around him, pulling him into a warm hug. Robbie heard choked sobbing from the man hugging him, and that just made him cry harder.

Robbie wrapped his arms around the man's uncomfortable leather breastplate and buried his face in the sweaty crook of his neck, but none of that mattered. Not right now. All Robbie cared about was this feeling of being held. It wasn't Sportacus, but it was someone who cared enough about him to comfort him. Even if he didn't know this man, even if this was the brother of the man who made his heart break and tears ruin his makeup, even if he knew this would solve nothing.

Robbie reveled in it.

It wasn't Sportacus's arms around him, holding him and caring for him in his time of need.

And that was more of a comfort than it ever should have been.

Chapter Text

He loves you, too.

He loves you.

Loves you.

The words circled around Robbie's head for days after his talk with Íþróttaálfurrin, and nothing he did made it stop. He didn't want Sportacus's love. Not anymore. Not entirely.

Okay, that was a lie. Of course he wanted it, but he really didn't want to chance suffering again. All he could think about was how different their relationship would even be if they started dating again. Or even spoke again.

It'd been two weeks now since they'd broken up, and neither had seen the other since. Robbie made it a point to stay in his lair where no one could bother him, and it sounded a little less loud outside. Maybe the elf was avoiding him as well? Or maybe Robbie had been so deep in thought that he'd accidentally found a way to tune out the shenanigans above ground.

Either way, he hadn't had the misfortune to see Sportacus's face or hear his voice, and that was just fine with Robbie. He was fae. He didn't want to be friends with an elf anyway.

Well, except maybe Íþróttaálfurrin wasn't so bad. The older elf had felt so terrible about what had happened, and he didn't even have anything to do with it. Not in Robbie's opinion. But he still came to apologize. And apologize he did. Robbie still hadn't quite shook the feeling of that hug. So warm and familiar, but not in the ways that hurt. It didn't so much remind him of Sportcaus as it did of someone loving him.

Robbie scoffed at the thought.

Love.

What a waste of time it was anyway. It shouldn't have been comforting thinking that someone loved him; it should annoy him. Why should he have to suffer any time he puts his heart out there? Robbie should know by now that love was just a rouse. A trap. A lie disguised as a gift. Even though Robbie did enjoy a good disguise, he didn't appreciate such a cruel one.

Sportacus wasn't the first one that had made a fool out of him, but Robbie was going to be sure he was the last.

He had loved Sportacus more than anything, so naturally this one hurt the most.

Robbie never wanted to find out if it could hurt any worse, and the easiest way to do that was to never fall in love again. Especially not with the elf.

-

Beeping. Beeping beeping beeping.

What the hell was that noise?

He rolled over in his bed to look at his alarm clock.

8:13 AM. He didn't have any alarms set to go off until noon. So it wasn't coming from there...

The beeping continued as he squinted groggily at the red LED numbers. His alarm wasn't going off? So what was that noise?

Robbie grunted as he tried to force himself awake, pushing himself off of his stomach and onto his back, slowly working into a sitting position. When he finally sat up and leaned against the headrest, he rubbed a tired hand over his lax face trying to focus on where the noise was coming from.

He checked the watch on his wrist.

8:17 AM. No alarms set till noon. Right.

He made a mental note to adjust the clocks at some point so they were in sync. With too much effort for so early in the morning, he swung his legs over the side of the bed, and instead of properly going in for the kill and standing like a proper adult, he did manage to slide off the bed, and sit on the floor. Legs outstretched and palms resting facing upwards on the floor on either side of him.

Robbie rolled his head back so it was resting on his bed and he was able to crack his back. His ceiling was starting to look a little yellow with dust. He'd have to clean that at some point. And set his clocks. Busy day.

The beeping cut off his thoughts. That came first. He had to find out what that sound was.

Robbie let out a grunt of frustration as he stood up finally, and took a queasy few steps to reach the bathroom. The beeping was annoying, but a quick trip to the bathroom was non-negotiable after just waking up.

As he got closer to the bedroom door, the sound got louder. When he opened the door, it was anything but muted. He was definitely getting closer.

Still, nature called, and he made a sharp right into the bathroom outside his room. From there he could hear the beeping was coming from the next room.

What room was over there again?

He couldn't think clearly as he relived himself, still half asleep and focusing hard on not fainting with exhaustion. When he flushed, it muted the beeping blissfully, but when it returned, Robbie sneered at it.

"Beep beep beep, I'm coming. Just shut up," he murmured under breath that was so ripe at this point it almost gagged him. A good tooth brushing was in order, but it could wait. It'd already been... about a month since he last did it? What was another ten minutes?

With a final sigh, Robbie made his way out of the bathroom and into the next room down the hallway. The door was already open and the beeping was sharp and clear in the room. He turned his head this way and that as stepped in, trying to locate the source. He was so close...

When Robbie reached the desk on the far side of the room near the small circular window, he knew he'd found it, and not because the beeping was loudest here. When he looked at the computer monitor and saw the live video feed on the screen of someone walking around a large, dark room, everything came rushing back.

Robbie's alarm system. At his old bunker.

Someone had triggered the security system he had in place.

Fully awake, Robbie grabbed the plush computer chair and sat down with interest, eyes never leaving the video.

Who had broken into his old home? And why had they waited until nearly a year after he had left Lazytown? It's not like he left anything there to steal, or break, or even salvage.

Robbie grabbed ahold of the mouse on the desk and silenced the alarm system's beeping. The program prompted him afterwards with a dialogue box.

'Would you like to release p:Sugarpie?'

Robbie chuckled and quickly pressed the "no" option. Sugarpie wasn't there anymore either, so if Robbie would agree to that, he'd have a rogue robodog running around him, not this intruder.

When the box closed, he examined the various set of camera angles he had playing so he could find whoever was stupid enough to break into his abandoned home.

"Ah-ha! There you are, gremlin!" he whispered excitedly, finding a moving shape in the camera pointing towards the middle of the lair. It was a wide shot and hard to make out who it could have been, so Robbie clicked on the thumbnail to make it take up the whole desktop monitor.

Just as the video was large and detailed enough for him to see even the tiniest of scuffs on the floor, the intruder looked up, almost directly at the camera.

Robbie's breath caught in his throat.

"What is he doing there?"

Robbie's mind went into overdrive just as it went into low-power mode, shifting between wanting to scream and wanting to pass out.

What the hell was Sportacus doing in his bunker!?

Chapter Text

Robbie watched the screen incredulously, trapped in stasis while his brain decided how to react.

Sportacus was in his lair walking around slowly. He was up on the platform that used to house Robbie’s disguises. Just walking along the grated floor over towards the back of the lair. He was still looking at the camera with a dazed look on his face. He slid his eyes away, glancing around the room as if looking for something. His hand was gliding along the railing, feeling back and forth as he walked along. Petting the metal gently, he continued his short trip past the empty tubes, and down the few back stairs to where Robbie's old workstation used to be.

Robbie scooted himself closer and leaned his face in towards the monitor as he tried to finesse the camera angle. “What are you doing down there?” he whispered to no one.

Sportacus approached the corner of the lair that at one point had housed Robbie’s greatest inventions, and stared at the empty space. His back was towards the camera at this point making his face impossible to see, but he watched as Sportacus drew his hand up to his head that bowed slightly to meet it. He saw his hand run over the back of his head with a slight unintentional tug on his cap and goggles as it went, and then coming down to rest as a fist on his hip. With a shake of his head, he turned back around and looked around again for his next target.

Sportacus's eyes landed on a large, circular patch of clean metal flooring at the center of the room where Robbie’s chair and rug had been. During the many years Robbie lived there, he had made many messes from this oily invention and that messy food item, and of course he had been much too lazy to clean them in time before staining, so there was a permanent clean mark on the floor from the protection of the rug. Robbie chuckled an off-handed laugh. Even after all this time, the mark hadn’t faded.

There was no audio along with the video, but Robbie could almost hear the soft steps Sportacus took towards the center. His feet reached the edge of the stained floor, and he brought up one foot about to step into the immaculate circle. It hovered by a few centimeters, and when he finally toed into the mark, Robbie let out the breath he hadn't meant to hold.

Sportacus took a few seconds to collect himself before easing in the other foot, hands extended outwards as if to keep him balanced while wading into a pond. His entire form now just inside the ring stood completely still. Except for his hands that were still outstretched, clenching and unclenching steadily. He took another couple of steps towards the middle of the ring. Sportacus’s face was turned sideways at the camera, his left side facing Robbie. He could see the man’s eyes flutter closed when he reached the middle.

“What-”

Sportacus fell to the floor landing on his rear and crossing his legs in one swift movement. His hands braced on his knees, and his back hunched over, his chin meeting his chest. Robbie, panicking that he had gotten hurt, started frantically clicking all over the screen, trying to get the video to zoom in more on Sportacus. When he finally did, he saw his face become stressed and crumpled, but he didn't look pained. Sportacus straightened out his back and looked up again at the ceiling. Robbie could make out more of the elf’s face now. His eyes were glistening and his brows had a contemplative look to them. He saw his mouth open and mutter something.

“What was that?” Robbie asked loudly, hand slamming on the desk in a brief moment of anger and confusion.

As if the elf had heard him, he muttered again but Robbie still couldn’t make out what he was saying.

“I knew I should have installed microphones," he whispered darkly. Robbie had installed speakers in the lair that was linked to this security program, but no mics. He had wanted to be able to scare off intruders easily with the speakers by just having his computer pick up a nice growl of his or whatnot, but he completely forgot to add the mic to the other end to pick up their screams for him to laugh at. He had meant to, but it was such a last minute touch that he had forgotten to do that before the move. What Robbie wouldn’t do to hear what he was saying…

He had to do something, though. He couldn’t just sit there, watching Sportacus talk to himself. Unfortunately, as much as he didn’t care for his ex, he didn’t want to startle him with the speakers. He looked so... fragile. Robbie had been a villain before, but even since before he had started dating Sportacus, he didn’t feel that craving for real villainy. It just wasn’t in him anymore. Especially since the move.

Robbie had moved out of Lazytown a few weeks after the break up. He’d decided that as much as he enjoyed the cold solitude of his lair, he couldn’t stand being trapped down there, but he didn’t want to have to commiserate with Sportacus anymore. It hurt him too much.

So he searched for houses online, and found a small one on the outskirts of a quiet old city a few towns over. It was about to be bulldozed for some kind of coding violation after it had been abandoned some five or six decades. At that point it had been just a dirty, dilapidated, rotting building nobody had the time or money to restore. Robbie decided that it was perfect. A few weeks of paperwork and a few hours of moving all his junk, with his magic and cousin’s help of course, he was all moved in.

It was just a tiny little single story cottage with a large attic that Robbie had renovated into usable rooms, and a tiny crawlspace for a basement. Just enough room down there for a fit handyman to fix a pipe, or a lithe policeman to gingerly coax out a family of raccoons.

Up in the attic was where Robbie had forged his bedroom and study; his two most essential rooms other than the kitchen, which was just below him on the first floor. He’d chosen to live upstairs simply because when he said he’d wanted a change, he’d meant it. No more living in a hole he’d dug himself. It was time he lived in a warm soft room with a window that granted him a beautiful view of his lush yard and thriving garden.

In the original floor plan, the main rooms were all downstairs and it was going to be a lot of work to alter that. Luckily, Robbie was no ordinary person. With his and his cousin's magic, they were able to completely transform the whole house exactly how he had wanted it. The only thing that had stayed the same was the living room. That was the only room with a personality when he’d gotten there.

All the walls of the house had started to shrivel away with rot and termites, but this room was almost immaculate. The wallpaper was a soft aged yellow with dozens of different kinds of flowers printed onto it, and the hardwood flooring still looked glossy as if recently polished. The furniture was musty, but no holes were chewed through from rats, and the dark wooden end and coffee tables looked untouched by vermin. Doilies adorned the wooden pieces and empty picture frames hung from the walls, glass and all missing from them. Robbie’s favorite detail of the room, however, was an obviously old crochet blanket that had been draped delicately over the back of the sofa. The light floral color of the sofa contrasting nicely with the dark earthy tones of the blanket. Its hand-sewn flowers gracing the corners, and abstract patterns of yarn quilted together creating a truly decadent piece.

When he'd first seen the room, he was almost shaken. How had this one room managed to stay so perfect? It's a mystery Robbie had never unearthed, but he had decided simply that the room had something to say. He had listened for days and finally decided that he should base the rest of the house on the look the living room had; floral wallpapers, soft paisley furnishings with dark wood finishes, hand crafted decorations now hung from every wall, and he had even made some heavy velvet curtains to drape around every window, of which there were many.

Not a single room went untouched. Even his bedroom was homey and decadent. A large bed sat against the far wall of the room evenly in the middle of the slope created by the roof. It looked silly for two people to share as sitting up against the headboard was almost impossible, but Robbie was alone and got to sit in the dead center of the bed, no roof touching him. He had meant to incline the height some months ago anyway, but it didn't bother him as much as it should, so it stayed low. The bedding was a loose copy of the crochet blanket downstairs, and his dresser and closet doors were carved to have springy scenes of flowers and birds popping off of them

As Robbie was lost in thought, more movement occurred on screen, reeling him back in. Sportacus had taken to doing sit-ups in the clean circle on the floor.

"Tch. Disrespectful," he said with just a touch of booming hostility.

For the second time this strange encounter, Sportacus acted as if he heard Robbie talking. He sat up, legs straight out in front of him and hands on his knees, his head turning left and right quickly. After a couple seconds of that, the elf jumped up and squinted his eyes in no direction in particular.

Hello? Robbie watched him ask.

Dread filled Robbie's entire body. Could Sportacus hear him? But how was that possible? He didn't have the system linked to the mic in his computer, did he? Robbie's eyes slid to the toggle on the screen, allowing it to access his mic.

It was turned on.

Robbie's hand shot up and clamped over his mouth. No no no no no this was not happening.

Hello? Robbie? Robbie made out his name clearly on the elf's lips. He'd lived too many years of his life watching Sportacus craft that name with his delicate mouth, using his thick accent to make it sound unique and beautiful.

With a shake of his head, Robbie moved the mouse over the toggle, ready to flick it to 'off' but something kept him from clicking. Some part of him could appreciate the situation. He could talk to Sportacus, but not have to listen to anything he said back. He'd be able to say everything he'd wanted to since that horrible night almost a year ago with no repercussions. He could tell him how awful he was, how much he hated him, how he had ruined Robbie's life, how much he had meant to Robbie, how much he had loved him, how much he still loved-

Robbie turned the mic off and force shut down the computer. No more of this. Sportacus can do as he wishes. It's not like Robbie actually cared about that lair anymore. Or anything inside it. Absolutely not.

He slapped his hand on his face, the sharp pain keeping him from his thinking about this anymore. Damn he needed a coffee. Or a beer. Or a baseball bat to the stomach. Anything sounded more pleasant than his current situation.

Anything to get his mind off Sportacus.

He could deal with this later. Maybe his cousin would help him one more time...

Chapter Text

Robbie's walk home from the grocery store was much slower than it usually was. He's a lazy man, but when it comes to his food, he usually likes to get home quick so he can get a head start eating all his goodies.

Today, however, Robbie didn't really want to go home. When he'd left that morning, he'd just decided to call his cousin to help with his... problem. He was hoping that if he just gave it some more time, he'd find that the elf had left his lair and that he'd never hear from him again, and that led to Robbie deciding to go on a five hour grocery run to the mini-market just inside town.

With a huff, he kicked his door in, unlocking it with a quick muttered spell under his breath. He immediately made for the kitchen to the left of the front door and set his bags down on the counter. What usually takes about five minutes to unload Robbie managed to stretch into fifteen and when he was finished, he decided a quick six hour nap couldn't hurt anything.

Robbie walked back out through the archway into the living room and when he made it to his chair and rug, he suddenly had the urge to lift the edge of the rug, seeing if there were any stains yet on his newer hardwood flooring.

Robbie found himself knelt down on hands and knees with a hand poking at the soft rim of the rug. He tugged up gently and found that the floor underneath was the same deep shade as the surrounding boards. No stains or clean marks yet.

Robbie made his way to stand up, making it about halfway with one knee still down next to his other foot when his doorbell rang.

Robbie whipped his head around to face the front door. He didn't have a doorbell. The house was too old to have had one when it was built, and with the consistent infrequency that Robbie receive guests, he had simply decided against installing one. Well, to be more accurate, he had never even considered it.

His head fell back with a groan. Robbie had made it a point since he moved here he that no one would know here he lived. Nice regulars at the market would invite him to their bloc parties, and rich clients of his would invite him over for home-cooked dinners with their families, and Robbie went almost every time. But when he was asked to host, he always declined. He made sure to prove he wasn't just being frugal by making sure to bring along a nice fancy platter to the parties, and expensive tasty wines to the dinners, but he would absolutely never let anyone near his house.

No one knew where Robbin Rotten, mysterious newcomer, lived.

Except one person.

"What do you want, Glanni?!" he shouted with his head thrown back and half-sitting on the floor.

The door opened with loud bang, slamming into the wall and sending a few paintings crashing to the floor.

"Robin! Is that any way to treat your beloved cousin? I'm shocked! I thought you had at least some respect for me," he said while placing a dramatic hand over his chest. "And after all we've been through."

"What are you doing here?" Robbie groaned, still gazing at the ceiling. He never did get around to dusting anything or resetting his clocks. He was much too busy avoiding his own house to do that.

"What am I doing- Robin, you called me!"

Robbie furrowed his brow, finally turning to look at his cousin. "I didn't call you," he said with indignation. 'Not yet,' he decided not to add.

"Nonononono, but you meant to. Robin, Robbie, Rob. I know you didn't actually call me, but I'm not stupid. I could feel you thinking about me, inviting me over, hashing out something. You're bothered and you need your dashing cousin's help,” he said with a wink. “You were even planning on having tea and biscuits out waiting for my arrival as a preemptive Thank you, Glanni."

Well, he was right about all of that, except the tea and biscuits. Robbie didn't feel the need to correct him. Instead he gradually brought himself to standing and walked over to Glanni. He looked him up and down, quickly taking in his appearance as he closed the front door.

Nothing much about him had changed since he last saw him. He still wore that god awful latex catsuit and heeled boots. His hair was trimmed perfectly, if just a little dirty, and his stubble was just light enough to give a hint of age, but not enough to even attract your eyes. And speaking of eyes, that was where the mystery lied. Glanni's looked troubled, almost serious. It was a weird look for his criminal cousin.

"Well, are you ready to listen then? I do need your help, and since you went through all he trouble of coming here, you may as well get what you came for." He grabbed a lithe arm and gently tugged his guest towards the sofa with the blanket draped on the back.

"When are you going to get rid of this dreadful couch, cousin? It's not fashionable anywhere anymore. It's so outdated, isn't it? Yes, how about I get you in contact with one of my, ah, friends, and we can work on getting you all new furnishings for your otherwise lovely house?"

"Stop trying to sell me stuff. I know your tricks, and you know I'm not interested." He pushed his cousin down harshly on his chest, letting him fall directly onto the couch while Robbie moved to his chair adjacent to Glanni. "Besides, even if I wanted a change, I wouldn't need to buy anything, except maybe a magazine for ideas. Anything I want I can just transform or create, you know this."

Glanni flushed slightly. "Aha, yes, well, old habits die hard? I'd try to sell you a brazier if I had reason to believe you'd buy one."

"A conman at heart," he teased.

"A salesman. It's the people I sell to that need to read the fine print," he corrected, picking at his sleeve. Suddenly, he let his arms drop and he looked at his cousin again. With a solemn expression he decided to get down to business.

"So what's going on that I could hear your agony knocking on my wards from a state over?"

Robbie groaned and heavily slumped in his chair, sending it rocking back and forth. "Glanni, I'm in trouble. I-"

"Trouble?!" Glanni leapt to his feet and made for the several sets of hand-crafted curtains to draw them shut as he spoke with fervor. "What did you do? Who's after you? Are your wards strong? How much can you pack in five minutes? I have a safe-house not to far from here, we can probably make it before-"

With squinted eyes at his cousin's antics, Robbie got up and grabbed Glanni by the shoulders, spinning him around. "Would you stop babbling?! I'm not in your kind of trouble, you criminal! Sit down and let me talk before you make my house look suspicious!" He pulls him back over to his seat and shoved him down for the second time in three minutes. Robbie waked back over to the curtains, reopening them as he spoke. "Closing curtains in the early afternoon. It's no wonder you're so pale."

"I'm mysteriously ghost-like. I'm not just pale, thank you. It adds character," he said, offended.

Robbie fell to his own chair and leaned forward, head in his hands, becoming overwhelmed with frustration. With an aggravated sigh he pleaded, "Glanni, I don't care! Will you just listen to me? It's serious!"

Glanni sighed back, mocking his cousin. "Then spill! If it's not cops or an angry mob, what's your problem?"

"Sportacus! That's my problem!" he lifted his head to yell, hands still up and ready to catch his head as it dropped forward again.

Glanni's face fell from irritated to somber in the blink of an eye. "Sportacus?"

"Sportacus," Robbie muttered in affirmation into his palms.

Glanni sighed and leaned forward in his seat and asked softly, "W-what happened?"

Sobering up, Robbie lifted his face and as he began to talk, he felt his eyes start to prickle. He began breathing heavily, trying to find the right words to explain all he had seen, while also trying to hold back unexpected tears.

"Hey, hey now. Don't you go crying on me. Just tell me what happened and we'll figure it out from there," Glanni whispered as he climbed off the sofa and walked on his knees over to Robbie. He placed his hand on his shoulder and rubbed soft circles there.

Robbie took a shuddering breath as he tried to talk. "He... he broke into my lair and-"

"Broke into your lair?! Who does he-"

"Glanni, please. Let me finish," he whined tiredly.

He bit his lip and let Robbie continue.

"He broke into my lair. He tripped an alarm and I saw him on the cameras I have there. He didn't... he didn't even do anything. He just walked around and touched things and then he just... sat there. Just sat on my floor where I used to keep my chair. He looked so tired, Glanni. I'm-." Robbie stopped himself, not exactly wanting to admit what he was going to say next. Unfortunate for him, Glanni seemed curious.

"You're what?"

Robbie placed his head back in his hands, muttering into the wet flesh as his tears finally broke free. "I'm worried about him."

Glanni apparently took that as his cue to pull his little cousin into his arms. He held him there for what felt like hours as his cousin accepted the embrace, but made no move to reciprocate. He stayed hunched in his ugly chair, crying on the sticky latex shoulder.

"Oh, little Robin, I'm so sorry," Glanni consoled, not expecting an answer.

Robbie did respond however. In possibly the tiniest voice an adult can make, he asked, "Why do I still care about him?"

Glanni remained quiet, and it just made Robbie more frustrated. He knew his cousin wouldn't have an answer, but he just needed something.

"Glanni?"

"Yes?"

"Help me."

Glanni pulled back and lifted Robbie's into an upright sitting position, looking into his eyes. "Whatever I can do, just name it. I'll bake you a cake, if you'd like. Or I can make that tea and biscuits you owe me. We can sit in tonight and watch movies. Say the word, and I'm yours for however long you need me here." He began petting Robbie's hair about halfway through his little talk, but Robbie wasn't interested in wallowing in self-pity, or stuffing himself with pastries and sweets.

"No, Glanni. I don't want that. I need to actually do something about this. I can't keep myself feeling like this about him." Robbie turned his head to look away from Glanni. He couldn't admit this to his face, but he needed to say it.

"I think I still love him, and it's ruining me," he admitted between shuddered breaths. His voice was soft enough that had his words almost went unheard.

"I-I can't stop you from loving someone," Glanni replied awkwardly. "That not something I can fix."

Robbie dropped his head again onto Glanni's shoulder. "I know. If I just hadn't seen him, I might have been fine, but just seeing him traipsing around my old home, watching him sit in that spot we shared for months, and then me remembering everything we've been through together... He looked so lonely and now I feel lonely. I miss him, but I'm still so hurt by what he did. You know, he never even apologized," he ranted softly, though his voice was getting stronger as his tears stopped and he eventually found himself tugging away from Glanni's arms. He held himself upright using Glanni's forearms as a support. "Thank you for coming, maybe I just needed to talk. I'll feel better when I stop thinking about it so much. I never should have looked at that camera."

"Why did you even look at them to begin with?" Glanni asked.

"I told you; I heard the alarm go off. Someone broke in and I needed to know who. When I looked, I saw him, and my day has been hell ever since. I turned off the computer and just got out of the house for a little bit."

Glanni squinted his eyes at his younger cousin. "You turned off the computer?"

"Of course. I couldn't stand looking at him any longer."

Glanni had an idea. Robbie could see it in his eyes and it frightened him more than in intrigued him. "So you never watched him leave?" Glanni asked slowly.

Robbie shook his head. "No I just turned everything off and left. Why? I don't like that look you're getting, Glanni. Tell me what stupid idea you're formulating in that tiny head of yours."

"Robbie, if he didn't leave, maybe we could, you know," he said excitedly, pulling Robbie to his feet by his elbows.

Robbie let him pull as his body went lax with terror. His face paled and his eyes took on a glazed look as his mind rushed around, trying to find a way to stop Glanni before he took this idea of his too far.

"No," he wheezed.

"Yes! It's a wonderful idea! Let's go see if he's still there, using your fancy human cameras, and then we go talk to the buffoon!"

Glanni started to tug on Robbie's arms, dragging him towards the staircase up to his study.

"No," he managed again, this time sternly.

"Yes! Robbie! He came to you! If he still feels something for you, maybe you can work something out!"

"No."

"You said yourself he looked lonely!" Glanni continued over his cousin's protesting. "Oh this is going to be wonderful! Don't even worry, my little Robin, I won't let him hurt you again. Just try! For me?"

Robbie was struggling trying to keep his arm away from Glanni who had a vice-like grip on him. "For you?" he asked, still trying to free his arm as they awkwardly climbed the wooden stairs. "What do you have anything to do with this?"

Glanni smiled and turned to laugh in Robbie's face. "Let's just say I'm sick of hearing about you lovesick fools!" He continued to drag Robbie with him up the stairs and as they reached the top, Robbie heard him mutter under his breath, "from both ends."

With even more terror at what those words could imply, Robbie suddenly managed to tear himself out of Glanni's grip and sent himself flying against the wall of the stairwell, grasping for purchase.

"Both ends? What do you mean by that?!" he panted.

Glanni stared at him, his smile lost momentarily. "You dog! Since when could you hear so well?"

"Don't," Robbie warned weakly with a shaking finger pointing at Glanni's face, "change the subject. Tell me what you meant. Now, Glanni. Are you talking to Sportacus?"

Glanni made to answer when Robbie jabbed him in the chest with the accusatory finger. "And don't lie to me!"

Glanni closed with mouth with a roll of his eyes, refocusing them to find Robbie's red and panicked face watching him closely.

He sighed.

"No. I'm not talking to that racist blue idiot," he said calmly/

Robbie's hand dropped to his side, deflated. "Then who-"

"Íþróttállfurinn."

Robbie punched him.

Chapter Text

Robbie dunked his biscuit in his tea, taking a large moist bite of the snack. The biscuits were a little stale, so they soaked up the sweet beverage nicely, creating a perfectly sweet and savory flavor. He munched on five or 12 of those for about an hour as he watched his cousin sleep on his beautiful sofa. Glanni was laying twisted on his side and front with half a blanket, not Robbie's favorite, draped over his lower half and snaking up along his side to curl underneath his head as a pillow that was propped up too high. He looked the very definition of uncomfortable and that suited Robbie just fine.

Robbie shoveled his last bite into his mouth with renewed vigor as he thought about the day's earlier events.

Glanni had been about to try and convince him that he should try and talk to the person who broke up with him. In hopes of them getting back together? Or maybe killing each other? Hooking Glanni up with him instead? Robbie wasn't sure exactly, but no matter what his cousin's reasoning, he never wanted to see that blue-suited blowhard again. Especially not with his loud-mouth cousin with him. That was just a recipe for disaster.

"Mmmmm," Glanni moaned in his sleep, rolling over onto his back completely. His dream was sounding too good and it was making Robbie cringe. Time to wake him up.

Robbie got up and walked over to his cousin who was writhing softly on his sofa. Standing over him holding his tea cup and saucer, he lifted his foot up and started jabbing him in his side.

"Glanni. Get up," he tried. The other man just continued to mumble.

Robbie lowered his foot and looked down into his tea. Something beautiful occurred to him. His tea was getting cold anyway he realized with a smile.

He poured his tea remnants on Glanni's face.

Glanni shot up and started sputtering, sending flecks of dark tea onto the blankets and his outfit. Unfortunately, it's extremely hard to stain black synthetic leather, so it didn't please Robbie as much as it should have to dump it on him. But seeing his hair wet and what little smudged makeup he had left beginning to run put a smile on Robbie's face.

"What was that for?!"

"Interfering," Robbie said cooly as he walked back into the kitchen, a wet relative hot on his heels.

Robbie set his cup and plate in the sink and turned to Glanni who was rubbing the tea off his face and massaging his cheek. The punch was bruising nicely and looked like it would stay there for a good week or so. It wasn't the first time he'd sported a punch or slap mark, but it still made Robbie grimace. As nice as it was to knock out his cousin for a while with a solid blow, he didn't like leaving marks on him. Mostly because he didn't like how used to it Glanni always seemed to be. He was always getting into so much trouble that nothing phased him, and Robbie knew that was going to be the death of him. Probably both of them.

"I wasn't interfering, I was helping you! And you punched me for it!" He dropped his hand and gave Robbie a dark look. "You punched me pretty hard. How long was I out?"

"Only about an hour, you baby. And you had it coming." Robbie spoke firmly as he was walking back to the living room. The dishes could wait a few months to be washed. "First you had the nerve to try and convince me to go back to Sportacus, and then you tell me that you've been talking to his brother all this time?!" Robbie's voice had grown a lot louder than when he'd started speaking. His hands were clenched at his sides and he felt another strong wave of Glanni could use another punch coursing through him. "Why?!"

Glanni squared his shoulders and looked Robbie in the eyes. "He contacted me."

Robbie let out a huff and plopped down in his chair, arms crossed to keep him from hurting Glanni again. "Liar," he bit.

Glanni groaned and flailed his arms around. "Why don't you believe me? It's not like I've never told the truth!"

"You're right, you have once or twice. Like when you were practically held at gunpoint for information by police officers and cruel thugs alike."

"That's not true!" Glanni wiped his hands on his face to calm himself. "Robbie, I'm telling you the truth. Íþróttállfurinn and I have had brief clashes in the past, what with our opposing career paths, and so he knew how to find me. He sent me a letter asking for my help a couple of weeks ago and he's been trying to get Sportacus to talk to you and now..." He trailed off, picking at his nails. "I'm trying to get you to talk to him."

Robbie felt his heart clamp in his chest. Íþróttállfurinn was trying to get them to talk? Is that why Sportacus had gone to Robbie bunker? Because he was looking for him? Because he-

"Robbin, are you feeling alright? Your face has gone red."

Robbie unfolded his arms and laid them gently on the chair. "That idiot," he spat.

"Beg pardon?"

Robbie pushed himself out of his chair and started to pace. "After all this time! He tries now? I'm not even there! And what was he expecting to find? Me, sitting at my chair, just waiting for him to come back? Well, the joke's on him! I've moved on! Too bad, so sad, Sporta... Sporta... joke! He had his chance!" Robbie knew his was yelling out loud, and he knew he had an audience to witness his tantrum, but he was too caught up insulting Sportcaus. He continued to call him some very colorful words, and with every passing moment, he felt more and more like his words were catching fire. It felt good to cuss him out, even if he wasn't here to hear it.

Soon, however, Robbie found himself running out of things to yell. He'd called Sportacus just about every bad name he could think of, and had arrived at a brick wall. He was still angry and could still feel the steam coming out of his ears. Robbie turned to Glanni who had backed himself up against the wall, hands up as if in surrender and his eyes wide in shock.

"Woah. Never saw you get like that," he muttered with a defensive tone. "You okay?"

"You!"

His hands went limp with his arms still in the air, falling to either side of his head. "Me?" he squeaked.

"You! You slimy, conniving, bastard!" Robbie started marching towards him, his fingers flexing at his sides. Glanni really looked like he could use another forced nap-time. "All this time, you've been egging him on?"

"What? No, you misunderstand! I've been talking to that blue body-builder's brother, not him! How can I manipulate someone if I'm not talking to them?" Glanni managed to press his body as far back against the wall as he could and had started to inch toward the door. Robbie caught him doing it and ran the last few feet to his cousin. He leapt in front of the door and placed a hand behind him on the lock, making sure it was engaged and keeping his hand over it. All the while, he continued to glare hatefully at Glanni. He watched his cousin's eyes dart around, probably looking for another escape.

"You are absolutely not running away from this. You've gone too far. I've known you for way longer than any sport elf has, and I know how easily you can control someone you've never even met. You plant a little seed in a friend, or a lover, or a relative, and soon the roots of your foul ideas reaches its target, and BOOM!" He yelled, sending literal sparks flying from him. "Glanni's gotten his way," he finished in a deep whisper.

Robbie saw Glanni eying up the stairwell and it made Robbie lose his train of thought. The only exit that way is jumping out one of the windows up there. He was furious with his cousin, but he didn't want him doing something so foolish. He'd have to act fast to keep him from hurting himself.

"Don't. Move," he warned. "I'm not going to hurt you. Don't be an idiot." Robbie's voice was still hoarse, but he tried his hardest to sound sincere.

"You've already punched me unconscious today! I'm not going to stand here and wait around for you to grab a knife or-"

"Glanni, I'm serious!" He took a deep breath and released the lock on the door after unlocking it. He managed to lower his shoulders and forced his face to relax. "I'm not going to hurt you. Again."

Glanni squinted at him and tutted. "Are you lying?"

Robbie continued to breathe slowly. "No. Sit before I change my mind."

"I'd rather stand."

Fire coursed through Robbie again. "Fine," he choked out.

Glanni raised an eyebrow at him. "Now, are you going to apologize?" he teased.

Robbie saw his cousin's face change from fear back to playful and aggravating pride in less than a second. It pissed him off as much as much as it helped to calm him back down.

"I will if you do."

Glanni folded his arms and slouched his back, bringing his hips forward in a relaxed, but painful looking position. "Sorry... or whatever"

Robbie balled his hands into fits in warning.

"God, you're a real brute, you know?"

"Glanni."

"Fine! I'm sorry! I went behind your back and I may or may not have gotten Íþróttállfurinn to talk to Sportacus about you, and I shouldn't have, but if you just go talk to him, I think you might change your mind about him. Even though I did this for you, I went about it all wrong. I'm sorry." Glanni had extended one of his hands to inspect his nails as he spoke, only looking up sheepishly when he finished. "Now it's your turn."

"First of all, thank you. Second, I won't go to him. He's had over a year to contact me, and if you're all working together, he knows exactly where to find me. Third," Robbie continued as he pretended to be interested in something he was looking at on the wall, "I'm sorry for punching you. You're a worthless waste of space, but you're my worthless waste of space, and I shouldn't have almost killed you." He turned back to Glanni who was giving him a wry smile. "I'm sorry. But don't ever talk about this again."

"Robin, you know I can't do that. You know how trusting I am, which I'm not, and you also know how fond of elves I am in general, which I also am not, and I of all people am telling you to give him a second chance? Listen to me for once in your life. You might realize you have more in common with him than you once thought."

Robbie help up a hand. "Please, no. I'm done talking about this. I've moved on."

Glanni gave him a disbelieving look. "Moved on? Tell me the last time you went on a date."

"I don't have to do that."

"You don't want to because it was over a year ago and with Sportacus."

"Shut up. You don't know that."

"Mhm? Then prove me wrong? Show me a text, an email, a dick pic, I don't care! Just anything to prove you've seen someone! Anyone!"

"Glanni!" Robbie yelled, his face flushing. "How I spend my personal time is none of your business, and I'd prefer it if you didn't request seeing pictures of my, or my acquaintance's, genitals!" Robbie finished gasping, having yelled out everything in one powerful gust. He felt his face all but catch fire at the conversation topic. But mostly, he felt scared. Glanni could not find out that he was right and he had, in fact, not seen anyone since he and Sportacus broke up.

"Oh, give it a rest. You still love him, and I'm giving you an opportunity to get back with him, but you're too stupid to take it."

"I'm not stupid," he mumbled.

"I'm sorry, you're right. You're not just regular stupid, you're the stupidest person I've ever met," Glanni corrected gently, walking up to Robbie.

"I'm not stupid!" Robbie yelled in his face. Some flecks of spit flew out of his mouth, but he was getting too upset to care.

Glanni put his hands on Robbie's shoulders. "But you do love him," he replied in a sing-song voice.

Robbie opened his mouth to retort, but closed it again, finding no way to retort without embarrassing himself.

"Please, Robin. What have you got to lose?" Glanni pulled hm into a hug, wrapping his arms around Robbie's neck. Robbie sighed into Glanni's neck, suddenly feeling tired after all the fighting. He wrapped his arms loosely around Glanni's waist as the other man began to talk again.

"If we go now, we might still catch him in your lair," he suggested with encouragement. "The two of you can have a nice long chat, make up, make out, and everything will go back to normal."

"I can't."

Glanni started to walk Robbie backwards to the door again while Robbie protested grumbles into Glanni, and reached around to grab the doorknob.

"Why can't you?" Glanni asked as he finally took hold of the knob.

Robbie unwrapped one of his arms and placed it behind him on Glanni's wrist, stopping him from turning it.

"I'm scared," he finally admitted in a small voice. "I'm terrified, Glanni."

"Oh, Robbie, I-"

"Let me finish. I poured my heart and soul into that man for so long, it was hard to even imagine how I lived so long without him being a part of my life. And he just..." Robbie stopped himself, trying to keep talking steadily. He wasn't on the verge of tears, he was just... tired. "He cut me out. He dropped me like I meant nothing to him. I can't let him do that to me again. I just can't."

Glanni pulled his wrist free of Robbie's grip and slid out of the embrace. He grabbed Robbie's face between his hands and leaned in closely.

"He won't."

"How can you be sure?" Robbie's face was stressed and thoughtful. He could feel the tension in his temples as he experienced several emotions flooding him. Fear. Hate. Anxiety.

Hope.

"Trust me."

Robbie laughed in his face and brought his hands up on top of Glanni's still holding his cheeks, leaning his forehead to rest against the other's.

"I've never trusted you for a minute," he whispered, closing his eyes.

"I know." Glanni rubbed his fingers in Robbie's temples drawing a reluctant groan out of him.

"Don't let me regret this."

Before Robbie knew he had finished talking, he was being dragged out his front door by the wrist.

He was going to see Sportacus.

Tonight.

Chapter Text

"Slow DOWN!"

Glanni laughed at him. His hand was clamped so hard around Robbie's wrist his knuckles were white and Robbie could hardly feel his own hand anymore. They'd been running for a few minutes into town, Glanni literally pulling his cousin along. Robbie was stunned already from actually agreeing to go see Sportacus on Glanni's whim, and he had expected the situation to be similar to tearing off a band-aid. One motion. He'd say yes and Glanni would teleport them to Robbie's lair.

But instead, they ran. They ran far from Robbie's house, finally reaching the main street of Robbie's new town, not his old one. They were still many miles from Lazytown, and from Sportacus.

Glanni stopped running, and pulled his cousin close to his side, tugging his arm around his back to wrap a hand on his waist.

"What does he like?" He had leaned his head close to Robbie's ear, but definitely wasn't whispering, and he was looking nowhere near Robbie. His eyes were focused wholly on the shops in front of them, a wild glint in his eyes.

Robbie wasn't sure what was going on, not even really knowing how they got here so fast. The walk usually took about forty five minutes, but they hardly took five. Even his car took about ten. His mind was spinning, but he vaguely figured that yes, getting Sportacus a gift might be a good idea? If that was Glanni's plan, he'd go with it. He was already committed, why not go all out?

"Um... Well his name is Sportacus. He likes sports," he said at a sudden loss as if he'd never met the man before.

"No. No sport stuff. What kind of other, non-sporty things does he like? Wine?"

"No, he doesn't drink."

"Pity. Makeup?"

"He'd just sweat it off."

"But those eyebrows..."

"I know, but he would never let me near them."

"Okay, maybe... Clothes?"

Robbie reclaimed his arm, unwrapping it from around Glanni, and fought the urge to cross his arms in judgement. "Who do you think we're talking about here? Alcohol, makeup, and clothes? We're not shopping for you."

"I know that, I just like the finer things, and thought maybe a nice expensive gift might be a good idea," he replied. Glanni was still facing the storefronts, glancing from one to another quickly.

"Well, he doesn't like those things, take my word for it. I know him better than you, and you two are polar opposites. Anything you like would make a terrible gift, so stop suggesting things off of your Christmas list."

"Fine. Maybe instead of thinking of something and then buying it, we could just walk around and pick something good for him? Does this ho-hum town have a thrift shop?"

Robbie broke and crossed his arms. "A thrift shop?"

"Yes. I hate those. Sound good?"

"Stop talking." Robbie took to walking in front of Glanni, heading towards the first shop on the street by habit.

"A cake shop? Don't you think Mr. Healthy would prefer something a little more... healthy?"

"I wasn't actually going to go in, I just go there a lot. It's weird to just walk past without buying anything."

They continued walking down the street, passing all the stores Robbie had grown accustomed to over the past year. There was the cake shop, some family-owned diners and grocery stores, a corner drug store Robbie had never been in, insurance companies, a few banks, and some more unique places like a flower boutique. All the major shopping places were in the next city over where you could buy bulk foods and mass-produced clothing. Nothing that big and rich lasted long here. The town was well-off, but it valued hard work and didn't trust when large companies tried to intrude. When someone did need something bigger, they'd bite the bullet and take the trip over, but it wasn't often.

"That's it? No raunchy video stores? Or pawn shops? Liquor outlets? How do you live here?"

"Happily. Until you showed up."

Glanni shook his head as they went past the flower boutique. "I'll never understand you."

Robbie didn't respond other than by sticking his tongue out, which he made sure Glanni didn't see. Robbie noticed he seemed to pick up his pace while walking past the flowers, as if he didn't want to be near them.

"I didn't know you had allergies."

"Huh?" Glanni asked, not turning around or slowing down until he was well past the floral building. "Oh, no, I just hate flowers. They're stupid. You can't wear them because they'll die, you can't take care of them unless you're born with the ability to care for them, and when you touch them, you get that nasty pollen all over your hands! They're pretty, sure, but they serve no purpose! They're a waste of space."

As Glanni insulted the plants, Robbie found himself unable to keep himself from approaching the curved archway serving as the entrance.

"What are you doing?" Glanni asked in a rush. "No, we are not going in there, Robin! Come on, why don't we go into that store with all that cake and- You're not listening to me are you? Oh my God, you're actually doing this to me." Glanni jogged back to Robbie who was inside scoping out some artificial pansy arrangements that can be bought as a real bouquet.

"What," he panted, "are those?"

"They're um.. They're pansies. Sportacus uses them." Robbie smiled, a quiet giggle slipping out of him as he caressed a few fabric petals. "He freezes the petals in his ice cubes. It makes his water look pretty, and he says it keeps him close to earth, even when he's flying."

Glanni squinted and leaned in closer to the flower. He sighed harshly, making the flowers shake beneath him. "So we're getting pansies? It took us this long to decide to get him some small, generic flower?"

Robbie shook his head and let go of the flowers, instead slinking around looking for something else. "No, not pansies. He picks them himself. That way he has a connection with them."

"Elves... " Glanni muttered.

"I know. I think it's silly, too, but we all have our peculiarities. Glanni, can you see roses? I don't see them."

Glanni squawked out a laugh. "Roses?! Wow, you're not messing around, are you?"

Robbie flushed and walked further away from Glanni's taunting. "No, it's not that! I mean it is a little bit, but that's not why I'm looking for them," Robbie explained, a hint of anxiety in his voice. "When Sportacus first came to America, he had wanted to learn everything about the country, and in his findings, he learned that the rose is the national flower. So he assumed that everyone just loves them here."

Robbie finally made it to a large glass walk-in cooler full of fresh cut and delicate flowers. Inside were a variety of flowers from around the world, but most of the shelving was covered in various colored roses. Glanni followed in after him, immediately wrapping his arms around himself to keep himself warm.

"Before he knew I wasn't a native here, he bought me roses for my birthday. We weren't even dating yet, so it was very awkward for everyone. All the kids laughed at us, and the mayor, well-meaning guy that he is, tried to give us some 'privacy' afterwards," Robbie recounted. He shook his head at the memory. "I had to explain to him that I'm none too fond of roses, or what they imply when handed over as a huge, bright red bouquet. He rightfully felt some shame, and apologized. But, by my next birthday we actually were dating, so he got me another one. Only he managed to find a purple one and throw it in there as well. It was a hideous arrangement that he made himself, but I loved it." Robbie caught himself staring wistfully at the red roses, cupping a few or them in his hands. He took a deep breath and shook himself from his thoughts.

Glanni laid a hand on Robbie's shoulder and got him to turn around. "You really are head over heels for him." It wasn't asked like a question, but Robbie still nodded.

"I need roses," he confirmed, denying to himself that his eyes were starting to water.

After finally hailing down a worker to assist them with the arrangement and checking out, Robbie and Glanni were finally walking out the archway back into town, a red bouquet in hand, accented horribly by a single blue rose in the center. He hadn't wanted anything else in the arrangement, but the clerk was able to convince him to add a few sprigs of baby's breath to bring it more together.

Glanni ran a few feet ahead of Robbie deeper into town and sat on the curb. He sneezed loudly a few times before flying his body backwards to lie down on the sidewalk.

"I thought you said you weren't allergic!" Robbie shouted as he ran carefully over towards his cousin who was becoming red in the face. He spent a good amount of money on these flowers, he wasn't about to jostle them already and ruin them before they even make it to Lazytown.

"I'm not, I don't know what this is," he admitted. "And my stomach hurts. Not like pain but it's like cramping, I don't know. My skin feels weird, though, am I breaking out?" He managed to scrape some of his sleeve up his lanky arm, revealing absolutely normal skin, if just a little sweaty.

"You look fine, now get up! These flowers aren't going to last forever and I have people to see and places to be!" Robbie exclaimed, gripping Glanni's forearm.

"Robin, wait, let me go!" Robbie released him immediately at the serious tone in Glanni's voice. "I don't feel good." He gripped his stomach and rolled onto his side assay from Robbie. "Go on without me. I'll be fine. I'll catch up in a few hours for after the make up sex."

"Oh, shut up!" Robbie yelled. His face was on fire and was glad his cousin couldn't see his flushed face. "This whole suicide mission was your idea, I'm not going without you!"

Glanni shot himself up and any 'illness' he may have been experiencing seemed to have faded away. "Fine. But I'm not about to be in the same room as you two. I'm your family for God's sake, I don't want to see that."

Robbie wiped a hand over his face as he watched his cousin stand up and brush himself off. "Glanni, nothing is going to happen. I mean, ideally something will happen, but it won't be that something." His flush was unrelenting and he had to turn himself away and begin his walk home to try and cool off.

"Hey, where are you going? Lazytown is this way!" Glanni shouted from behind.

Robbie stopped in his tracks and spun back to Glanni who was pointing in a different direction from Robbie's house. "I know which way it is, but do you intend on walking the whole way there? I do have a car, you know."

Glanni made a disgusted face. "A car? Oh, you assimilating weirdo, you don't mean to tell me you've stopped teleporting, do you?

"Of course I still do that, but not over entire cities, Glanni, that's just reckless. I'd like to make it there in one piece. Part of me tells me that Sportacus won't appreciate me pronouncing my undying love if half of my body is scattered in a different city," he announced sarcastically. "Now let's get moving. It's almost evening."

The walk back home took more time than the journey into town. Robbie's nerves had finally caught up with him and his mind was full of all of the doubts from this past year. He never should have let Glanni talk him into this. He wasn't sure why Glanni was suddenly pulling out of this, however. He was the one who insisted, why should he be getting cold feet? The questions clouded Robbie's mind during the trip home, not paying attention when they finally arrived at his driveway.

"Good, we're here. Can we rest before we drive out? Or maybe go tomorrow morning? It's getting late and we shouldn't be out after dark. There are some weird types out once the sun sets, you know?" Glanni asked as he followed Robbie up to his car.

"I'm related to one of those weird types, now get in the car." Robbie opened the back seat of the car and gently laid the flowers down on their side. "It's going to take just under an hour to get there, do you think they will be okay till then? Maybe I'll turn on the air conditioner."

Glanni rolled his eyes. "They'll be fine, just don't freeze us, please. As much as I want to keep my figure, I don't want it to be because it's encased in ice."

Robbie chuckled at his dramatic cousin as Glanni climbed into the drivers seat at Robbie's insistence, and opened the passenger's door from the inside. The car was older and had its quirks, like the passenger side door could not be opened from the outside at all. Robbie knew he could fix it, but it was going to take a lot of effort, and he didn't often have anyone use the second seat anyway, so he never really felt the need to put himself out like that.

"Hey, Glanni?" Robbie asked hesitantly, sliding into the seat next to his cousin.

"Hm?" Glanni responded. He grabbed the keys Robbie leaves on the dashboard and started the car's ignition. He began to back out of the narrow driveway in front of Robbie's house and onto the main road.

"Do you really believe this will work? Do you think he'll take me back?" Robbie refused to look Glanni in the eye, fear and embarrassment keeping his eyes firmly on the shrinking house before them. He saw Glanni glance at him briefly, but couldn't bring himself to face his cousin in case he said something Robbie didn't want to hear.

"Robin, you worry too much. You two will be inseparable again soon. Don't think about it anymore, okay? Just sit back and relax. Take a nap if you want. I'll wake you when we get into town." Glanni spoke confidently, but Robbie's nervous coils in his stomach kept him from believing it. It was exactly what he had wanted to hear, but at the same time...

"I hope you're right, Glanni. I hope your right," Robbie muttered. He sighed trying to calm his nerves and decided that a nap sounded wonderful, if he would be able to fall asleep at all. He reclined his seat, careful not to land the back of the chair on the flowers behind him and closed his eyes.

"I hope I'm right, too," he heard Glanni whisper before screeching the car onto the road, starting the terrifying drive back to Lazytown and more terrifyingly, back to Sportacus.