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Chapter Text

The night was hot and the air was whistling with the wind as Oliver stepped onto the big ship. He was thrilled for the opportunity, sure, but he’d be the first to confess he didn’t exactly have sea legs. The only other time he’d been on a boat he capsized the whole thing, killing his father and little brother Harry Potter.

But I digress, Oliver was excited to be boarding the grand vessel. Without his boss Niall Horan paying for it he’d never be able to afford it. But with him paying for it he could, because he wasn’t the one forking up the cash. If it wasn’t money from his pocket, he was able to be aboard the beautiful vessel the news was calling the Ginormous.

It was a decorative, outrageously expensive vessel, one that Oliver never would have been able to afford without his boss Niall’s generous contribution. Still his room was on the lower levels. Still that was more than he would have been able to afford on his own salary, a meagre payment of averages wages.

Later that night after he had met a lot of people he went to bed. Lying in bed he thought about all the things that had led him to this moment. Did they matter?

…Wait, what was that sound?

The walls of his small room creaked in the night. Above his head, if her wasn’t mistaken about it, he had just heard a thud. Did someone fall out of bed?

Suddenly he heard more thuds. What was happening?

He decided to poke his head out of the doorway and into the hallway. Peering up and down, he saw no one. He crept out into the hallway and walked up the long hallway to a doorway, he went through the doorway and then he went up the stairs to the hallway upstairs. There was no one in the hallway. He counted the doors along until he hit the one that must be above his own room. He hesitated before he knocked.

The door opened very suddenly. A boy was standing there – no, a man. He had black hair and tattoos all over his skin and eyeliner – he looked like a goth. Oliver just gaped.

“Are you a goth?” He splurted out without thinking about it. The goth narrowed his eyeliner clad eyelids.

“Yes, my name’s Harry Styles, and I’m a goth, so what?Do you plan on doing something about that?”

“My name’s Oliver Wood,” said oliver. “I’m a magicial boy, we don’t really have goths where I come from. It’s nice to meet one.”

“Well here in my world of large ships goths aren’t spoken to so rudely.”

“How SHOULD I know how it works in the ship world? Id never be able to afford this place if my boss wasn’t payign me money to be here.”

“Youre poor?”

Oliver frowns deeply, a dark frown clouding his face. “I get average wages.”

Harry Styles the goth Scoffs. “Just average? MY wages are more.”

“Well not all of us  are goths.” Oliver barks.

“And not all of us deserve to be on this ship they call the Ginormous, or that’s what the news is calling it.”Scoffed Harry.

“You watch the news?”

Harry raises an eyebrow. “Don’t tell me you do as well?”

“Just because I get average wages doesn’t mean I don’t have money for a news TV,” scoffs Oliver.

“I’m impressed you can afford a news TV,” says Harry, “but that doesn’t excuse the average wahges. If you don’t mind me I’m off to bed.”

“Wait! I forgot, I wasn’t just knocking on your door for no reason. I wanted to ask – what were those thumbs?”

“Don’t ask me anymore questions, I’m busy. I’ll talk to you later. See me on the balcony. Midnight.”

With that he slams the door. Why, it was ten to ,midnigth now! Oliver started running in avle to gfet to the balcony as quick as he could good thing he was fast and good at Quidditch.

He arrives on the balcony and Harry is there swishing his jet black hair back and forth in the dark night winds.

“You heard the thumps?”Asked harry.

“Who’s to say I did or didn’t?”

“Don’t be coy wizard – those thumbs are bigger than what you know. I have to go to bed now. Don’t come knocking again unless you’re willing to accept the ultimate price.”

With that Harry was gone. Oliver started crying. He didn’t know what the thumps beant, but he knew it wasn’t good for him and this goth he met on a big boat.

Chapter Text

He was plagued with bightmares of thumps coming to his ears in the night. Then awoke. Hold on, that wasn’t a nightmare, the thumps were real and coming from somewhere on board this big ship. He was surte it was above him, Harry’s room. The very room he had been to just minutes earlier.

And it contained a man he met called Harry.

What could he do?There were no ship police, he was sure of that. The only thing left to do was rally up the troops and stage a mutiny.

He bagn knocking on all the doors on his floor, all the friends he had made that night, all the lower class average waged boss employed folks, the good salt of the earth folks, folks who didn’t need big money to have big ideas. Sure, they had money, enough to get by and be comfortable and happy and fed and sheltered, but they didn’t have the money to be here, except they were here. And they were sick of discrimination.

He couldn’t stand it, just thinking about that wage gap made his skin boil. He had to have a mutiny  he had to show Harry he was worth more than a gutter boy who was unemployed. He wiped off his sweating brow and commanded his middle waged army with a solemn salute.

“Tonight we take back whats ours – we take back the ship they stolr gttom us.”

All of them took a heaviung cheer. They were out of breath with passion for the cause. 

“The average working man and woman have been sidelined on these luxury crusies for what feels to me, and I think to my boat brothers and sisters in arms here today, an eternity of opression and classism never seen before.”

Without any prompting, the crowd of millions began chanting “Freedom and money for the boatfolk!”Over and over. It was sweet milk and honey for Oliver Wood’s weary ears. He drank in that golden liquid of support and revolution from all of his loyal followers.

“Bow to Oliver!” he shouts. “Bow to me, and we will have our mutiny.”

Chapter Text

In waves of bloodied bodies, they rose to the heights of the ships’ balcony where the captain lay waiting. He had heard word of the mutiny, afraid of the forces of armed workers that were relentlessly pursuing his role as captain on board the ships that the news caLLED Ginormous. He loved his ship, but mayeb they time had come for a mutiny.

The crowd heading toward him came to an abrupt stop as though a phenobnix fro mthe ashes rose from the center of the crowd of salt-of the earth folks on a golden steed. His name was Oliver wood, that was one thing no one on this ship would ever forget again.

“Captain Ron Weasley- your reign of tyrannical opression is over. It is me, Here to challenge you  to a  mutiny.”

“I knew it would end this way, just not on the first night of my maiden voyage. I suppose what you stand for matters more than my big money and big ideas.”

With that, Oliver lead the charge, killing and trampling the Captain Ronald Weasley. He is dead immediately. A cheer rises up from the crowd like a pheonix from the ashes.

“Freedom and money for the boat people! We are not to be silenced!”

Says the crowd.

Suddenly, Oliver went back to his room, job done. He did it ! The reign of terror was over, and now, a mutiny began. Anarchy would reign on this cruise ship, but first, he had to wodner:Would it stop the thumping?’

And what was the thumping? He may have staged a mutiny but he hadn’t solved a mystery of the man he called Goth Harry Styles. Most of all, he didn’t solve the mystery of why whenever he was around the longer man, his head fluttered like a flag in the wind.

But no – he had other pressing matters. For one, he needed the sweet kiss of sleep.

Chapter Text

He awkoe to loud thumping. But this time, it was at his door. He groaned and rubbed him eyes as he got up to answer the cabin door.

“What is it?” he groaned.

“Sir, it’s me Petey.” Said Petey.

“Oh, hi Petey, how’s the mutiny going?”

“Bad, sir. There’s a commotion on the balcony.”

Again? Thought Oliver Wood. That balcony was bad news.

“Okay, thanks for telling me Petey. Oh, and please get the word out that from now on I would like to be called Razzle Dazzle.”

“On it sir.” Said loyal Petey, his best boat friend, as he ran off down the hall.

After a long blissful shower in the deceased captain’s golden plated quarters, Razzle found himself again on the balcony. “Now whats the racket? I thought my mutiny solved all conflicts.”

“Not all, you spineless coward.”

He narrowed his eyes. He knew that voice from somewhere. But where?

“It’s me harry styles, from the room above yours.”

Oliver barked a cackle. “Oh! Harry Styles… how the tables have turned.”

“Hardly. A mutiny can never really replace the wealth and power of a true captain of a luxury cruise ship.” Harry snarled viciously.

“That’s what you think, born with a silver spoon in your mouth.”

“You don’t understand the goth lifestyle all right? Don’t act like you know me just because you know what I look like.” Harry snarled.

“I already told you I don’t even know what goths are. I’m a magical boy and we don’t have goths at Hogwarts.”

Harry rolled his eyes. “If you think that will garner you any pity from me think again.”

“Sir!” shouted Petey, “The boat is capsizing!”

Drawn out of his drunken Harry stupor, Oliver found the boat was in fact capsizing.

“What do we do captain?”Petey asks, the voice of all the lost middle class souls that surrounded him hopefully.

“That’s easy Petey,” smirked Razzle. “We stage a fucking mutiny.”

Chapter Text

He was in the captain’s quarters frantically drawing a blueprint. On his left was Petey, biting his dark blue fingernails clean off with worry, and on the other was Harry Styles who insisted on followign him into the room.

“This is never going to work,” Harry sighs, panicked.

“Naysayers will have mutiny,” Oliver tutted.

“I’m tired of these games Oliver. When are we going to just do it, right here on this ship? Sex I’m talking about!”

Oliver stopped the frantic movements of his hand. Slowly, he looked up and met Harry Styles black-rimmed eyes.

“My name is Razzle Dazzle now.” He snarled. “And I’m King of this sinking ship.”

With that, harry styles was thrown in the brig.

Oliver didn’t have time for the raven haired beauty he just threw in the brig. He promised revolution, a better life, a brighter shores – to the people, HIS people, and he’d acheieve it especially if it was what destoyed him.

Was he crazy? Sure. But all the best leaders were a little crazy. And he’d have to be crazy for this plan to work.

“Get these prints to Zayn, pronto,” Oliver said and shoved the blueprints into Petey’s frail arms.

“On it sir.”

He emerged from his cabin and wiped the sweat from his dripping brow. Hold on a second…

The thumps.

It was the perfect time to ask Harry Styles questions about the thumps.

But that would have to wait, as he was getting a phone call. He looked at his phone and sweared brutally under his stilted breath. “Shit. it’s my boss Niall.”

He picked up the phone. “Niall Horan it’s me oliver?”

“Oliver! It’s been over a day and you haven’t called me. Is there a problem aboard the Ginormous?”

“The ship is capsizing Niall, but I’ve got it under control.”

Niall let out a guttural moan. “You Better! I need intel.Have you contacted the goth yet?”

“Yes he’s in the brig.”

“Okay – call me as soon as you question him agent Dazzle.”

With that Niall hung up the phone and Oliver wiped the sweat from his brow. It was going to be a long day. But he was up for it and most of all his heart was skiupping a beat at seeing the raven haired beauty of Harry Styles once more. He had to clean his body and mind of these feelings. Nothing could get in the way of the mission,

Chapter Text

The ship was tipped so far by now it was an effort to walk up the balcony and down the stairs then down more stairs to the deep abyss of the brig, but Oliver Wood was nothing if not fit as a fiddle. He took it all in a stride, calming the passerbys, his followers in the cause, with a cheeky wink as he made his way to boat prison.

There he was, sititng in the dank stone room on the bottom deck. Oliver laughed as he saw Harry sitting curled up on the floor.

“Pathetic. Who has the better wages now?”

Harry rolled his black eyes. “I can’t believe i….”

“What? Can’t believe you what?” Oliver questioned with his mouth,

“I can’t believe I thought I loved you!” Harry screamed.

There was a silence for a moment, then Oliver looked down at his feet. They were fully sunmurded in water.

“What?” He whispered, looking up.

“You heard me. Don’t you remember? We both loved the news, had friendly banter. Then you let this – this mad mans’ revolution go to your head! I don’t even recognise you anymore!”

Harrys face was now inches from Olivers’ own face. He felt his resolve shift, but only for a moment. “Don’t act like you care about me. You thought you were better than me because of our different social statuses and wealth.”

Harry scoffed, throwing his arms in the air. “Really oliver? Fuck!” he groaned deeply. “All I remember was falling in love with you!” He shook his head violently.

Oliver had had enough of this. He was tired of Harry’s skilled diversion tactics. Love didn’t’ matter anymore, all that mattered was the cause. He started to strut out of the slowly flooding room to leave Harry to his death.

“It’s like – you think worse of me just because I’m rich!”

Oliver stopped dead.

“What did you just say to me?”

Harry gritted his golden-clad teeth.  “You heard me,” he groaned. “You’re predjudice against me because of my wealth.”

Oliver grit his teeth and did not blink. He paused for a long moment, pausing internally. It’s like the world stopped moving except for his heart.

“The only prejudice here is the ocean current against the time clock of our slowly impending deaths,” Oliver finally coughed out shyly before turning his heel and absconding from the dungeon, slamming the iron curtain of doom behind him.

What he didn’t know, however, was that the tide of destiny would soon envelop his heart in a tidal wave of unstoppable lust.

Chapter Text

Christmas was in the air for all aboard the horrid ship called the Ginormous, called so at least by the news outlets that named it. Petey led the Christmas cheer by decking the halls of only the upper deck, hanging tinsel and wreaths of pure gold, and, at Razzle Dazzle’s orders, did not do the same to the lower decks where the previous higher deck boat folk now resided. Instead he hung banners that were painted in red and green and read “Who is better than who now, according to wealth and status?” and each of Dazzle’s bloodthirsty army came to throw good edible eggs at the newly lower-class boat people.

“I love forging new Christmas traditions,” Dazzle sighed wistfully in his golden chamber. Alas, no one was there to hear him speak for he was alone. He wasn’t taking part  in the Christmas festivities going on below. Instead, he found himself yearning.

He wasn’t entirely sure what he was yearning for… he just felt in his heart a yearning in his heart so strong and so wild it couldn’t be contained by his ribcage. How could this be the case, when it was Christmas, he was captain of a boat, and he owned an army? Everything was perfect! But still, he yearned. The heart was a fickle thing, and fickle things were made to be broken.

Suddenly, his phone rang. “Yes?” He gobbled into the speaker.

“Dazzle? It’s Niall, from One Direction agency. What in God’s name is going on? “

“Why, I’m yearning, sir,” Dazzle gobbled into the speaker.

“Yearning? Dazzle, you are on a mission. Yearning is for… well, it’s for goths! Pick yourself up and complete the mission, I won’t heed you any more warnings.”

Oliver ground his metal teeth hard. Something about answering to his boss Niall while he was in this state wasn’t making him feel fantastic. Usually he loved to be given orders. Orders meatn work, work meant money, and money meant he could pay for things like news tvs and products. And he loved products. But today something felt strange. Maybe it was a bit of Christmas magic, maybe it wasn’t.

“Niall, listen. I’m on a big boat and it’s sinking. You sent me here, sure, but I’m out here and you’re god knows where – probably gallivanting around with your sexy boyfriends Draco Malfoy. That’s fine and all, I won’t judge you for being gay, but it means I’m the one in control of this sitatuon and not you.”

“Thank you for not judging me for being gay. that means a lot, Dazzle.”

“love is love sir.”

“Nonetheless, what youre doing here is basically called a mutiny.”

Razzle Dazzle blushed. “What’s that?”

“That’s when an open rebellion against the proper authorities, especially by soldiers or sailors against their officers. "a mutiny by those manning the weapons could trigger a global war"”.

“Ah, a mutiny. Yeah I’ve done those vefore. I guess you could say this is a mutiny…” Dalzzle trailed of huskily, “Of the heart…”

Niall started to seethe. “You’re my best agent, dazzle. Don’t do this!I”

Dazzle thought for a moment in contemplation. He had been so loyal to the agency, all his life, since birth, since he was raised by Louis Tomlinson after being found in the forest and trained as the secret agent. But that had all been before… and this was now after. He had changed.

He couldn’t help it.

Harry’s words had gotten to his head.

And, his heart.

“Call me Oliver Styles. Merry Christmas, sir.”

He threw his phone out the porthole and began to run.

Chapter Text

Oliver gasped out loud when he entered the brig. Except, as he did so, his mouth instantly filled with water, as the opening of the brig door opened a wave of salty ocean water into his mouth and face. When the deluge had stopped he shook his head and coughed wantonly. “Why is there water in here?” he screamed.
His eyes scanned the waterlogged brig, now at a good 40 degree angle titling downwards, for his sexy lover and future widow Harry Styles. Unfortunately he couldn’t see much but floating furniture and water and brig items.
“Where is he,” Oliver grunted urgently under his breath. The brig had still been locked when he came down… Harry HAD to be in here! Panic was setting in. If harry was in this water filled brig he… he……..
Suddenly, without warning, a figure burst out from the water beside the wider man. “AHHH!!” Oliver screamed, as he looked upon none other than Harry Styles…
…Though something was wrong with him…
“Oliver, for fuck’s sake. Why did you leave me in the brig when this ship is sinking.” Harry said, closing his gills.

“Harry,” Oliver said wistfully, ignoring and choosing not to here what the goth had said. “You’re alive!”
He couldn’t hide the excitement, the delight in his voice. Harry frowned even harder, his eyeliner disappearing in his frown lines, making him look almost normal. But the thing was, there was nothing normal about goth Harry Styles. And Oliver had decided he liked it that way.
He felt a kiss coming on.
But before he could fully prepare his tongue for combat, the boat shook and groaned around them, causing Oliver to tumble gracefully into Harry’s tattooed arms. “Whoops!” he yelled, face first in a tattoo.
That’s when he noticed it.
He had never looked closely at Harry’s tattoos before, thinking they were just meaningless goth symbols he wasn’t equipped to understand. But he recognised the symbol he was looking at right now against his face. Because it wasn’t a symbol at all. It was a face – a face of a man he knew too well.
It was the face of Niall Horan, his wealthy boss at one direction agency, where he worked to earn a wage. An average wage, that made him money enough to be comfortable. But not rich, instead average – but comfortable nonetheless – financially, that is.
“What?” Dazzle growled into Harry’s beefy bicep.
Harry jostled him. “Get up, come on, we have to get out of this ship dead or alive,” Harry says, tuggling Oliver’s body whether he likes it or not up the stairs out of the brig, Oliver helpless to do anything about it because of shock he was in, water from the brig embracing him like a widow, water from the brig embracing him like a secret, like a forgotten promise. Brig water filled his heart and mouth. Brig water from the brig enclosed him in a deep, sensual sleep.
-
When he woke, it was god knows when. And worse, Dazzle was alone.
“Barry?” He mumbled. All he could taste was salty brig water. His stomach felt full of the briny ocean brew. It tasted bitter and sad like being alone tasted like.
But then harry was there. Walking into the room, which was now tilted at a 90 degree angle, Harry was drenched in water and naked completely, except for his pants and shirt and shoes he had on. Oliver blushted deeply and strongly, seeing wet Harry Styles dripping on the floor.
“You saved me,” Oliver rasped as sexily as he could manage.
“Yeah,” Harry said. “You would have deserved to die down there. I don’t’ know why I did that.” He looked down. “Maybe it was feelings I still harbour for you. But you missed your chance with me when you threw me in that brig. We could have been something. Maybe. If we tried, but now we’ll never know. Our relationship was dead in the water, like you would have been if I hadn’t saved you this day.”
“Give me another chance. I had a job to do. I-“
That was when he remembered the thumps.
“Why do you have my bosses’ face tattooed on yourself?”
Harry looked down at his rippling bicept and blushed. “Secret reasons,” he murmured.
Oliver waited. When harry said nothing he raised his thin eyebrow. “Like what?”
“I can’t tell you, FUCK! Oliver!” Harry pushed his jet black hair out of his jet black eyes, grunting in frustration. “I’m -- I’m trying to protect you!”
“Protect me?!” Oliver got up, facing harry toe-to-toe. “All you’ve done is turned into a power crazed madman and doomed this sinking ship to a watery grave!”
“Oliver, that was you!”
Dazzle shook his head rabidly. “Shifting the blame will solve nothing. God, I thought someone like you would know more than that.”
Harry narrowed his black eyes. “Fuck, oliver.. I don’t know if I want to brutally kiss you or brutally kill you right now.”
“Why don’tu you do both?”
Harry shook his muzzle. “I can’t believe I fell for someone like you…”
Oliver was about to protest, but then – Harry attacked him with a kiss. His top lip touched oliver’s top lip, and then, when that was done, the two’s bottom lips gently collided in fireworks. They stood motionless lips to lips for what felt like hours, and was.It was the least erotic and most sensual thing oliver had ever experienced, and his ex- was Zayn. from one direction.

Chapter Text

THUD.
Suddenly, there was a thud to end all thuds and the boat jerked forward, throwing Oliver sexily but very violently into Harry's arms. Both were severely injured.
"What was that?" The goth growled gutterally into Dazzle's dislocated shoulder.
"A thud," the oblong man replied. "but not just any thud, not like... hey. Hold one. What were those thuds?"
"Thuds?" Harry goobled.
"Yeah, from ages ago."
♤'Whwn I dropped my luggage above you?"
Oliver's mouth drops. "That's all it was?!"
Harry flushes beet purple. "Yeah. I just wanted you attention and you seened really into those thuds, like, curiouser than you should have been , considering. My luggage was just covered in vaseline and i kept dropping it."
Ohhhhh. what a funny joke!" Lliver says into Harrys red hair.
¤ _÷!^"Yeah, said harry. "But thats not what was just now thurdding. It was something else that did this to us."
"Are you serious?" Oliver queried. "What is it then?"
"Believe it or not, I'm as clueless as you this time."
It was then their questions were answered, and by none other than true Petey.
"Sir! Sir! We've hit an iceberg and are capsizing! We must evacuate post hence!" Petey screamed.
"Capcising?! How? I made this boat unsinkable," Harry snarled.
"An iceberg, sir!" Petey snarled.
"Quiet, lads. We must follow Petrays advice. Advance!" Dazzle commanded, pointing forwads at the exit.
The three ran and were met with an army of men.
"Good men, we are dying. We must evacuate this ship. To the lifeboats! Strong, useful men board first and women and children can wait, as they are less useful to society." Dazzle delievered this speech with the poise of an English captain, homourable and proud.
"Aye, sir!" a chorus of men respond, saluting and marching upwards. They would do anything Dazzle said, and thinking this made me shiver with the excitement of power. To have true power over others, to control them, it was a divine delight like nothing else; a drug Razzle was injecting into his veins with the glee and relish of a frenzied dictator.
"Wait," Harry said, grabbinf his arm. "You said men women and children. wat about goths?"
"Oh," Dazzle said. He coughs under his breath. "Well, I'm sorry, biut i guess you're less useful than us so you can wait in your turn in the social hierarchy."
"Are you bloody joking me right now Razzle Dazzle? After we kissed so normal? You've got to be bleeding kidding me guv."
Even though hearing Harry say his name arouses both his heart and loins, he sticks to his principles as he always will. "Look, im sorry guv. But this is just how it is and i have no desire to implement change."
Harry spits blood. "To think i lost my tongue viriginity to you. Fucking christ above, Dazzle. I could never love a fascist like you. I hope you die now."
Oliver shook his head and walked on. He wasn't going to let a beautiful broad ruin his euphoric power high, so he followed his men to the starboard?, leaving harry, a broken heart stamped to nought but a red stain, behind in his wake.
His men were bravely shoving womej and children out of the way to board the lifeboats and he went to do the same, drowing out their screams by shoving them overboard and drowing them. He got into a boat with 6 guys who were HUGE. Ripped from head to toe and breaking out of their 18th century woolen naval outfits.
"Nice," he said pervertedly as the boat set off. He was on the first one, of course. It was dark and he could see fires alight on the Ginormous. Other lifeboats were being lowered but he couldn't see well.
"Come on men. Let's row. Hey, i see a island."
The king pointed to a smudge of land in the distance, and he nearly squeed with joy. They were saved!
"Thank Christian God! Amen!"