Archive of Our Own ^beta

“Shinsha? You don’t have to hide. Come on, come on in.”

A set of pale fingers closes around the doorway to the medical room. A thick strand of hair and a one red eye inches into view, just for a second, only to disappear behind the wall again.

There’s an irritated sigh and cling of some sort of tool.

“Shall I drag them in here? I should check if they’re in one piece, anyway.”

Recognizing the rough voice of the medic, Shinsha shrinks in on themselves and hides their head in their arms. Their determination falters, but at the same time, their legs refuse to obey.

“That won’t be necessary.”A thoughtful hum reaches Shinsha’s ears, the same they’ve grown used to hearing as they watched from afar a blue-and-silver haired figure studying the maps and scribbling notes over the huge table in the hall.

“Hey, Shinsha?” Euclase calls out again, softer than before, “It’s amazing, you know? I’m watching up close, but I can’t even tell when the pieces join once Rutile puts them together! Wouldn’t you like to see? Rutile still has it in them, after all!”

“What was that supposed to mean?”

Rutile’s tone spells danger, but Euclase’s stays light and playful.

“You know, at your age….”

“ Haaah? ”

A bowl clatters loudly against the floor. Shinsha jumps onto their feet, stumbling and nearly falling right onto the infirmary floor. They raise their head just in time to see Rutile wield the largest piece of Euclase’s leg like a club.

“Do-don’t!”

Shinsha’s cry is met with a half-surprised, half-angry stare from Rutile and a burst of airy laughter from Euclase.

“Plan: lure Shinsha out, success! Or should it be, lure Shinsha in?”

“Excuse me?” Shinsha looks from one senior to another, confused. “Euc-nii, you…”

“It’s fine, it’s fine! We’re just playing around! Rutile, don’t scare the baby,” Euclase scolds, wagging their finger. They can’t quite keep up their mock-serious tone through stifled giggles.

“Just wait, I’ll carve you up in your sleep…”

“Did you say something, Doctor?” Euclase smiles sweetly. “Don’t be afraid, Shinsha. They’re all talk, but they’d stay up all night if someone needed help. If you get used to it, that character of theirs is pretty cute.”

Shinsha’s hands clench into fists at their sides. Their cheeks heat up, their gaze and voice both filling with reproach . “You shouldn’t act like this, Euc-nii. It’s mean.”

Rutile whistles in appreciation. “Serves you right,” they say, picking up the bowl of glue from the floor. ”I like you, kid.”

“I don’t-” Shinsha blurts out before they can catch themselves. This time, Euclase laughs so hard they nearly fall off the windowsill.

“What a - oh, honestly! - what an adorable kid you are! Steadfast, too - and it seems that you like flowers, don’t you?”

Shinsha hangs their head, reminded of the reason why Euclase has to be repaired in the first place. It’s Shinsha who put them here, in the infirmary.

“I’m sorry, niisan. If I didn’t try to get that flower…”

“It’s all right; the most important thing is that you didn’t fall off that cliff. And if your older brother here slipped a little…

“It’s because of how graceless and rusty they are,” Rutile huffs, pressing another piece to the glued break.

“I can’t argue with that,” Euclase says, before adding wonderingly, “Do you think Bluezo even knows such words as “graceless”? You’re both such delinquents, and yet, you’re so different…”

“Shut up. I’m a scientist. Keep pissing off the person fixing you, and I’ll swap your arms and legs.”

“Kindly forgive me~”

Shinsha watches the exchange with growing discomfort, unsure if they should stay or go. The two seniors seem to have forgotten about their existence; even though they aren’t partners, seeing them push each other’s buttons like that, it feels like Euclase and Rutile are surrounded by an impenetrable bubble. There’s an air of camaraderie between them that could’ve only been built over centuries Shinsha has no idea about.

“Um…”

“Oh, sorry, Shinsha. But don’t feel bad, okay? Everyone got in trouble when they were little.” Euclase shows them a warm smile, this time, without a hint of teasing. “You’re not damaged, are you? All’s well that ends well.”

“....The flowers were ruined, though.”Shinsha looks down at their hands, as always, surrounded by tiny, floating droplets. They would eventually fall or stick onto something, but before long, more poison would leak out of their skin in their place, and more destruction would be left in Shinsha’s wake. Even if it was so little, just a small bunch of blossoms, the image of flower heads weighted down, broken stems and drowned leaves makes Shinsha feel cold and dizzy. “I shouldn’t have tried to get one…”

A troubled, downcast expression mars the harmony of Euclase’s face. Rutile carries on with their delicate work, as if nothing happened; not seeing their face clearly, Shinsha nearly jumps in surprise when its Rutile who speaks out.

“Shinsha. Do you know where flowers come from?”

“From the ground - “

“Obviously. But something has to be in the ground, first. A seed, or a special kind of root that grows parallel to the ground and can bear new plants.”

Shinsha’s mouth drops open. “I... didn’t think you knew such things, Rutile-nii.”

“You cheeky brats, I swear,” Rutile mutters, exasperated. “We use some of them in medicine; of course I know. For the example…”

Euclase gestures at Shinsha to sit down. “ Story time !”, they mouth excitedly. Forgetting their shyness and apprehensiveness towards the short tempered medic, Shinsha grabs a nearby stool and turns all of their attention to the lecture.

“You little-! Stop! Get back here!”

Shinsha is old enough to know that stopping is the last thing they should do, and the other order should not even be considered. They pick up the pace, not caring about their frail ankles nor the shoe they lose as they take the corner. Charging full speed ahead, they nearly crash into unsuspecting Diamond.

“Shinsha, whaa-?!”

Shinsha narrowly dodges them, instinctively grabbing Diamond’s sleeve as they run past. Not wanting to fall or hurt Shinsha, Diamond has no choice but to follow.

“Shinsha, why are we running?”

“Just run!”

Shinsha pulls Diamond into a storeroom. They almost trip over a ladder used to put up blinds for the winter, and huddle behind a huge roll of cloth.

Diamond sits on the floor daintily and gives a soft sigh, readjusting and patting down their uniform. “Honestly, Shinsha… What happened? Why was Red Beryl chasing us?”

Shinsha hugs their knees. “Because of this, I suppose.” They point at their shoulder with their chin. The left sleeve of their summer outfit is decidedly shorter than the other, with a slightly uneven edge.

Diamond gasps in horror.

“You suppose? Shinsha, why did you - you cut your uniform! What happened?”

“You’re asking me?”

“Of course,” Diamond nods seriously. “You wouldn’t do something like that without a reason.”

“Am I supposed to be touched by your faith?” Shinsha mumbles, turning pink in the face. “It… got dirty. The sleeves are so wide, and… white… I tried to wash it, but it wouldn’t come out.”

“Oh, Shinsha… What were you thinking? Beryl-niisan is always making adjustments we can barely even see, of course they would notice!”

“I wasn’t! I wasn’t thinking, okay! Shinsha bristles up. “I panicked! Go on, feel superior all you want… You never cause problems, after all. Even if you did, everyone would forgive you right away.”

“That’s true,” Diamond agrees, without a hint of conceit. Rather, they sound genuinely troubled. “I’m making you feel bad. I’m sorry. But we could make use of that! I will come apologize with you.” Diamond reaches out to take Shinsha’s hand into theirs. “Everything will be alright!”

Shinsha hurriedly snatches their hand back. Even with Dia wearing gloves, it’s still too close to Shinsha’s poison for comfort. “...Not now. Let them cool off a little.”

“Okay, but we’re going later. No buts, hmm? Also, Shinsha - “

“What now?”

“You skipped our lessons again today! Sensei was worried,” Diamond cocks their head to the side, trying to peer into Shinsha’s lowered face. “Is it because of me?”

“You know it’s not! Not everything revolves around you. It’s just…”

“Just?”

Trying to explain is about as pleasant as deliberately breaking themselves, but taking the brunt of Diamond’s wounded expression, even if calculated, is even more unbearable.“It upsets Sensei when I’m around. I can just tell Sensei is feeling all tense and apologetic, and can’t focus from thinking too much about what’s wrong with me. It’s not Sensei’s fault, and yet… It’s like with this uniform,” Shinsha smiles bitterly, “If I didn’t wear it, it wouldn’t have gotten dirty. I read books by myself later, so it’s fine.”

“And the lesson was so interesting today, too…

“Is that so?”

Dia livens up. Their eyes sparkle in wonder. “It was about how we’re born! From the sea, and then, the Beach of Beginnings…”

“We already had that.”

“In more detail! Since Sensei said we’re big enough to hear what lead to it all. What happened to the planet is sad, and this island may be the only land left… But I still like how everyone comes from the same place. Even though the sea is so vast, and we were just tiny inclusions at the start, everyone knows where to go, and we’re born together! It takes a long time, but we’re not alone. Isn’t that wonderful?”  

Shinsha hides their face in their hands. Only Dia could take… that out of a story of planetary destruction. “You’re too dazzling,” they whine, “I can’t stand it. Alright, you won! Let’s go apologize! Let’s get it over with!”

Diamond only smiles sweetly and offers to help them up. Shinsha ignores the extended hand and storms out of the storeroom, leaving Dia to run after them.

From the outside, Red Beryl’s studio is strangely quiet. Diamond stops at the door, tries knocking on the doorframe, then calling out.

“Red Beryl-niisan? Are you here? Shinsha wants to tell you something!”

“You said you’d come with me!” Shinsha protests in a hushed whisper. “Don’t you dare leave now!”

“I’m not going to, but it’s you niisan is mad at - I don’t think they’re home, though…”

The two Gems cautiously walk inside.  They can’t stop themselves from looking around; the room is so choke-full of mannequins that Shinsha and Diamond have to move between them like in a labyrinth. Some mannequins hold seemingly identical winter and summer uniforms, some displaying frilly, flowing hibernation dresses at various stages of completion.

“Wow… even though there’s still so much time left!”

“But of course. You can’t complete designs so extravagant in a day. They are obviously not here, though.”

Shinsha reaches a table littered with clothing pins, pieces of fabric and paper. There, they spot a note, written in an incredibly flowery hand. “ Supply run !” is all it says.

“Shinsha, look!”

Diamond, who followed close behind, holds up one of the sketches. “It has your name on it!”

The Gems bring their heads together, taking a closer look. “It’s a summer uniform… But if you compare it with mine, or the ones on the mannequins, aren’t the sleeves shorter? Both of them.”

The sketch is rough, hastily done with sweeping lines that betray irritation, but Beryl’s hand can still be seen. The sleeves are surrounded by a few scribbled notes with arrows, some of them extending to the different points of the outfit, labelled “ for balance .”

Shinsha’s shoulders begin to shake. Diamond gently takes the sketch and puts it flat on the table.

“Let’s come back later.”

With a light touch on their back, Diamond steers Shinsha out of the studio before the tears gathering in their eyes can fall on any fabric.

“I’ve been looking for ya, kid!”

Shinsha sighs, marking the page they were reading with a finger. Along the jellyfish pond at the entrance, taking huge, hurried steps, comes Blue Zoisite. The disorder on their head seems less deliberate and artistic than usual, as if they have been pulling on it in agitation, while their collar is even looser and more crumpled. What piques Shinsha’s interest the most, however, is that they’re alone. The book almost falls out of Shinsha’s hands as the obvious thought enters their mind, but the fear quickly subsides when they take a second look. Bluezo’s sword is sheathed at their back, and aside from the ever-dishevelled collar, their uniform shows no signs of damage that could result from a fight. Blue Zoisite didn’t run from fights, they ran into them. Started them, if things got too quiet. But especially, if Peridot was involved… No matter how much they tried to put on a rough facade in front of others, they’d have fought to the last shard.

Confused, Shinsha looks up to check the color of the sky. Though the clouds have begun to dye pink, with how high the sun still reigns on the horizon, the patrols should only be halfway on the road home.

Blue Zoisite comes to a screeching halt a few steps away. “You! Come with me right now! Hurry!”

Shinsha surveys the older Gem carefully. There’s a frantic air about them. “What happened? Do you need help?”

“I don’t - who needs help !” Bluezo sputters. “Just come with me!”

“Oh? I thought you were in trouble.” Shinsha narrows their eyes. “Then, I will return this to the library first.”

“There’s no time for this shit! C’mon, hurry! Leave it here!”

“Lapis-niisan will be angry.”

“Like I give a damn about that creep, when Peridot - !”

“That “creep” will hear you if you shout,” Shinsha points out. Some bravado disappears from Bluezo’s face. They look around nervously, trying and failing to not make it too obvious. “So, something has happened. Alright. You better explain on the way, niisan.”

“So?”

Bluezo tugs at their hair, messing it up even more. “You know how Peridot gets, when they see some interestin’ stuff? There’s no getting through to them! Before I even notice, there they go…”

“Are you trying to say you lost your partner?”

“I didn’t lose them, geez! I know when and where they wandered off!”

“Why didn’t you follow them, then? What am I here for?”

Not meeting Shinsha’s eyes, Bluezo says, quieter, “It was off the patrol route.”

“Wait… you were scared of getting lost?”

“What did ya say!?”

Shinsha’s collar is grabbed roughly. Keeping their own solidity in mind, Shinsha doesn’t try to resist.

“It’s not my job to know every damn bush around! I don’t have the free time to wander all over the place all day like you do!”

“You knew I was slipping out? And you didn’t tell Sensei?”

“Not like you were doing something wrong, eh? You seem more put-together than some of us, though I liked you better before you started tryin’ to act all cold and tough. Gives me the freaking creeps, with your cute face.” Bluezo lets go of them and looks darkly towards the reddening horizon. There’s deep worry in their eyes. “But that Peridot, they’re just chasing after some weird weeds again… They’re still a squirt. When they notice I’m gone, and they ended up somewhere they don’t know - aaargh! Let’s go, let’s go!”

“Weird weeds? Was that an area with a lot of bushes? You would’ve passed by it…” Shinsha checks around their neck out of habit and draws their eyebrows in concentration. The comment about their attitude is more… disturbing, than offensive. Blue Zoisite was supposed to be the brawn, not the brains. To think that they could see through Shinsha so easily. “One third of the way from your post. You must’ve really hurried back.”

They feel an unpleasant, bitter pang in their chest. Must be nice, to be so loved.

“You know where that is? You couldn’t see a few steps ahead, the path just vanished!”

“I do. We should hurry. It’ll get too dark for you two soon.”

Peridot doesn’t seem particularly frightened when the two find them. Their mouth falls open in surprise, but before they can say anything, Blue Zoisite catches them around the waist and unceremoniously throws over their shoulder like a weightless package. Peridot kicks their legs in the air a few times for the sake of it, though it looks more like childish delight than alarm, and launches into an enthusiastic, detailed description of their findings. Bluezo’s loud nagging, peppered with swears, is enough to interrupt them a few times, but not completely stop.

Shinsha leads them back onto the patrol route, walking ahead, a bit faster than necessary. They don’t look back on the reunited partners; the sound of their bickering is enough to tell that they’re still there.

“Hey, thanks. I’ll pay you back somehow.”

“...Never mind about that.”

Blue Zoisite sets down Peridot, who has the gall to look disappointed that the ride is over. They give a meaningful tug to one of Peridot’s sleeves, stained green like their hair, and brush away their attempts to straighten out Bluezo’s own collar.

“By the way, kid…,”they call out, “Don’t let Lapis turn you into one of their little pets. Would be a shame.”

“Blue? I think Shinsha went home…”

Though nothing is blocking the view of the path to the School stretching out in front of them, Shinsha is nowhere to be found.

Shinsha notices they aren’t alone in the library even before a shadow blocks the gap between two rows of shelves Shinsha was browsing. It’s not the quiet presence of Ghost; though the air turned awkward when they were face-to-face, Shinsha and Ghost had an unspoken agreement to coexist peacefully. As long as Shinsha let Ghost be invisible, Ghost did them the same courtesy.

It was a relief, sometimes.

“Isn’t that Shinsha! How rude of me; I wasn’t aware we had a guest. Is there anything I could help you with, today?”

That unexpectedly low, almost seductive voice is unmistakable. Shinsha hears the rustle of long hair being pushed over someone’s shoulder.

“...Lapis.”

Lapis smiles lightly. It’s supposed to be a sad smile, but the dim light of the library gives it a sinister shadow. “Oh my. Still not my biggest, fan, are you?” Lapis leans against one of the shelves, inclining their head. Their face arranges itself into a perfect picture of trouble and remorse. “I’m afraid I only have myself to blame. I pressed you too hard, last time. Please, forgive me. It’s so hard to contain my curiosity, when confronted with your wonderful power.”

“You have some nerve, to call it wonderful to my face.”

“But isn’t it just? There’s so much we don’t know about it yet, and unknown things are wonderful. They contain infinite possibilities; the bad, and…”

“And?” Shinsha finds themselves echoing.

“Hope,” Lapis speaks the word slowly, with near reverence, as if planting it in Shinsha’s chest. Shinsha feels it take root.

 I’m sure you know it too, right? This feeling.” Lapis gracefully pushes off the shelf and spins around on their heel. More light falls on them, making the gold bits in their hair sparkle brightly as they turn. Suddenly, they seem much younger. “This is why you keep exploring our beautiful island,” Lapis traces a spine of one of the journals with their finger, “and devour everything you can find here. Am I wrong?”

“I-If you don’t stop spying on me...” Paper crumples in Shinsha’s palm. How could they’ve been so stupid? Their thoughts go to the unassuming, reticent face they’d sometimes spot among the sea of books. The solace the library provided was too good to have been free.

“Ooh, scary. It takes one to know one, doesn’t it? We’re similar… At the very least, we enjoy similar things. That’s why I thought I’d invite you to one of our reading sessions, as my way of saying sorry.. It’s just about time to start.”

“....”

“It’s reading, nothing more. I’m simply trying to extend an olive branch. I have made quite a discovery. Aren’t you interested?”

Taking a step back, into the light, Lapis holds out their hand in invitation. Their smile doesn’t seem ominous anymore, just sweet. Have Shinsha been making it up?

It’s just reading. Shinsha recalls the way Sensei recited truths of their existence, creating a simple, soothing rhythm, like a lullaby. It’s been so long since Shinsha had someone read to them.

Shinsha and Lapis run into Ghost holding a pillow under one arm and a wooden stool in the other. Ghost looks at Lapis in confusion, looking for an explanation.

“Dear, could you get another pillow, please? Shinsha will be joining us today.”

Ghost simply nods and disappears between the shelves again. Just before they go, they send Shinsha a glare, harder and darker than Shinsha thought they were capable of. It’s like another person entirely staring them down. Ghost’s gait seem different, too, their steps bigger. Shinsha files it away for later.

“So what is this discovery?” Shinsha asks when they’re seated, Shinsha and Ghost on the pillows, Lapis on the wooden stool. “It’s so I get better light,” Lapis had explained apologetically.

“I believe this is… a story,” Lapis says, fondly stroking the well-worn paper cover. “We don’t have many of those. ”

“A story?”

“I’ve skimmed it. It seems like one of our lost brothers had a flair for the dramatic. It’s a record of their battles, but not as dry and impersonal as the other journals you’d find. I am sure you will see what I mean.”

Shinsha gets it as soon as Lapis begins reading. Lapis’ hypnotic timbre draws them into the story, but the writing itself is brimming with life. Even Shinsha, with their distaste for fighting, finds themselves cheering for the author, who seems so real that Shinsha feels they could touch them if they stretched out their fingers. Not just the author, either; Shinsha matches personalities and characteristics, vividly described, to names they’ve only seen or heard mentioned in passing with no context. The feats on the battlefield seem exaggerated, the maneuvers a bit too perfectly executed, at times, but the danger is palpable, and victories deeply satisfying. The bits of everyday life, something that was missing from the other records, and the author’s thoughts of their partner weaved in, make the fight feel worth it.

Shinsha is so immersed they don’t immediately notice when Lapis makes a longer pause.

“Lapis, go on,” Ghost whines softly from the side.

Startled, Shinsha glances around. Silver figures, tiny Gems bearing swords, dance around Shinsha’s shoulders in an imitation of a battle. Lapis stares not at Shinsha, but at that spectacle, with transfixed, hungry eyes, the book forgotten at their lap. A started scream tears out of Shinsha’s throat. In a split second, the poison loses the will moving it and sloshes down onto their head and back.

With a huge crash, Ghost falls sideways trying to get away from the splatter. It’s probably the most noise Ghost has ever caused. Still feeling Lapis’ gaze drilling into them, Shinsha scrambles to their feet and runs without looking ahead.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry, I’m sorry!”

Night-time covers the School with a shroud of silence and calm, changing it into something nearly unrecognizable. Some of the pressure from everyone’s stares is gone. Wandering around the empty corridors as their own nightlight, Shinsha plays pretend that they’re the only Gem in the world - free to go anywhere, without worry about who they may scare or hurt, staying up because they want to, not because they had too much energy from wasting away in their room, avoiding everyone else. At first, their ever-cautious footsteps turn a little bolder; Shinsha purposefully lets their heels click, even breaks into a short run, watching their shadow move across the wall like a playmate. They even dare to peek into the workshops, as if no one could get mad, and sit, just once, on a chair that still looks more like a log of wood than a piece of furniture. Shinsha gets as far as trying to come up with what use they’d have for the huge space, on their own, when the deep, long shadows lurking under the ceiling and in the corners turn the innocent ( Was it, Shinsha asks themselves, was it really ?) make-believe too real. The darkness, so discreet and deceptively soft, becomes terrifying, and… empty. Not like Shinsha wanted. The farthest, farthest possible thing from it.

Just this once, they welcome the poison seeping out of their exposed arms and legs, adding to the bubble of light around their shoulders. Shinsha steps back, into the brightness from the jellyfish pond, and sinks to their knees.

Someone’s else’s steps echo through the first floor. Shinsha looks for a place to hide; they’re in enough panic to consider the pond, for a fleeting moment, but they quickly remember that they aren’t allowed to touch the water. Meanwhile, whoever it is - who could’ve Shinsha woken up? - is getting closer.

“Oh? Hey, hey, you there! Don’t be scared, it’s just plain old me!”

“Padparadscha...niisama?!”

“What’s with the ‘sama’... Don’t tell me, Rutile’s influence? Now that I think about it, I haven’t seen this face before. Could you be the little pebble I heard so much about?” Padparadscha kneels in front of them. Even like that, they seem huge. Larger than life. “I already met little Diamond earlier today, so you are… Rutile’s favourite junior, Shinsha?”

“Fa-favourite?!!” Shinsha’s mouth drops open. “But I always have to get fixed, and I always get nagged at, and I talk back…”

“Sure you are, from what they say. Rutile gets attached to people who cause them the most worry,” Padparadscha says with a wistful smile. “It seems like they like your guts, too. But what’s wrong? Can’t sleep?”

Shinsha nods.

“Just like me! I’ve got enough sleep for a decade, at least. Since we’re already here, won’t you chat with your older brother a bit?’

With another nod, Shinsha scoots off to the side and hugs their knees. Padparadscha sits casually leaning against one of the pillars.

“So, aside from getting on my cute partner’s nerves,” seeing Shinsha’s startled expression, Padparadscha winks playfully, “What’s weighing on your mind so much, to bring you out here?”

“I feel like I shouldn’t be here. Not anywhere near the others.”

If it was anyone else, they’d have either jumped to reassuring Shinsha that it’s not so, or grew angry, but Padparadscha is as relaxed as before. They may even be a bit curious, though without the greed that’d sometimes flash through Lapis’ eyes. Padparadscha’s light smile is unimposing, not requiring to be mirrored.

“Why? Are you a bad kid?’

“... I’m the worst. As bad as they come.”

Padparadscha bursts into laughter. “Ooh, a bold statement! You don’t hear these often, around here. It’s a bit refreshing.”

“Even though you’re Rutile’s partner….?”

“Rutile is more of a softie than they seem. But do the others think the same?”

“Of course they don’t,” Shinsha spits out. “Even if they did, they wouldn’t show it. They’re too kind for their own good! I’m so weak I can’t fight, but I could hurt them… I could kill them, like everything I touch. They couldn’t even break me and toss me in the ocean, because it would ruin the water! I know it’s a burden, to have me around,” Shinsha rambles, their voice shaking uncontrollably, “I can see how uneasy they get when I walk in! But they still force a smile and say it’s - it’s okay like this. And I’m the one doing this to them.”

There’s no response from Padparadscha, only a thoughtful hum. Shinsha buries their face in their knees.

“I don’t want to be seen, anymore…”

A big, gentle hand touches their hair. As Padparadscha strokes their head, the trembling in their body gets worse and worse.

“It feels shameful, doesn’t it?” Padparadcha says softly, not moving away even as more and poison starts swirling around Shinsha; Shinsha can tell by the sound. “Of course you’d rather be strong and reliable… or at least, ‘normal’. Just not causing trouble would be enough, huh... But you can’t, poor thing… as long as you’re here. You can’t help it.”

“Don’t tell them - don’t tell them, please - !”

“I won’t. I feel just the same, after all.”

Shinsha looks up. The older Gem is looking towards the horizon, somewhere far, far away; their eyes are distant, but somehow familiar. A bit like Shinsha’s own.

“You put it really well. Our family is way too kind for their own good, really,” Padparadscha sighs, the wistful smile returning to their face. “You hang around Rutile, so you should know. How hard they have it, with me. Maybe, if they managed to leave me behind, they could live with less worry… But we can’t just say those things to their face. The truth would hurt them too much.”

“It’s awful. I hate it.” Shinsha sounds small and childish, even to themselves, but they have no energy left to care.

“Haha! Straight to the point, again. But isn’t the dawning sky beautiful?”

Padparadscha stands up and stretches, like after a long sleep. It makes sense; from what they said, they only woke up some hours ago.

“It’s so open and clear... Almost makes you believe we could go anywhere we want.”