Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

February 16^th, 2001

In the end, it’s the light that draws Maggie to actually step foot on the beach.

Well, maybe not the light exactly, but the prospect of the warmth that’ll come with the light. And the wonderful smell of food cooking.

Because although wherever she is now is nowhere near as cold as Nebraska this time of year, she’s barely eaten in over 48 hours and there’s a chill in the air now that the sun has started to set. And with the setting sun had come the dwindling of Maggie’s spirits. She’s got no plan, no money, nowhere to go, no one to turn to.

She’s spent the past two days crammed in the luggage compartment of a passenger bus she stowed away on. It had been a split-second decision, and one that her aching muscles are still protesting, but it had gotten her out of Blue Springs with no one the wiser. She’d gotten caught that morning when she snuck out to use the bathroom at the gas station they had stopped at, but she’s pretty sure the bus driver hadn’t gotten a good look at her face, and she had scattered like the wind before anyone could stop her.

Which is how she found herself here, somewhere along the coast, but where exactly, Maggie has no idea. She’s never seen the ocean in person before, never been anywhere like this in her life, unless the lake trip her family had taken when she was little counted. But the body of water before her now can’t even be compared to anything she’s seen before, and besides, she isn’t going to think about them now.

She’s been watching the bonfire for a little while before deciding to come down. It seems to be some kind of party or a celebration. There’s plenty of people around; teenagers hanging out in groups, families with little kids running around, and groups of older looking adults as well. There’s tables set up with all kinds of food, a couple of grills going, and music playing from some speakers set up in the sand. The festivity seems high, and Maggie figures she can blend right in without too many people noticing her.

Maggie isn’t prepared for how soft the sand is when she takes the first step off the boardwalk. She stumbles as her sneaker sinks in and winces as her ribs pull at the sudden movement. She clutches an arm tight to her side and hopes that nobody sees and notices her unfamiliarity with the beach.

She makes the mental note to not act like this is an entirely new experience for her, cinching her backpack straps tighter to her back in an effort to make it less conspicuous.

Act like you know what you’re doing. Like you belong.

She tries to run a hand through her hair to calm her nerves and meets nothing but empty air.

It startles her for a brief second before she remembers taking her pocket knife to her waist-long hair in the bus station bathroom right before she left Blue Springs. She had chopped it off to just above her shoulders and flushed the evidence down the toilet.

With everything else that’s happened, she’s almost forgotten already.

The sight that met her when she looked in the mirror after had been that of a teary-eyed stranger. She's always gotten compliments about her beautiful hair growing up, mainly from her mother, who always encouraged Maggie to keep it long and well-cared for.

Maggie laughs bitterly. What she would say if she saw me now.

She shakes her head. No use in thinking like that now.

She heads towards one of the smaller bonfires set up away from the main one, it being the place with the least amount of people milling around. The food tables are calling her, but she’s still a little leery of interacting with people and that’s where the most action currently is. Maggie figures she can wait a little longer to see if the activity slows down as the night goes on. 

She holds her hands out to the flames dancing in front of her, letting a sigh out as she does so. The heat feels great on her tired body, the aches and pains that had accumulated over the past few days.

She stands there for who knows how long, soaking in the warmth and letting the sound of the waves and the fire flickering before her lull her into a trance.

It’s the most content she’s felt since this whole thing started, since coming home and seeing her note laying on the kitchen table.

The way her mother wouldn’t meet her eyes and the slam of the front door and the way her dad– 

Her dad.

The ache in her chest is back.

“Want a marshmallow?”

The question comes from nowhere and Maggie nearly jumps out of her skin.

She lets out a noise that can only be described as a squeak and turns to find a girl standing next to her.

She’s got long, dirty-blonde hair and can’t be any more than ten, judging by her size. A pair of glasses sits on her face and the way the firelight is reflecting in them makes it hard to see her eyes. She’s holding a marshmallow on a skewer out to Maggie, but she’s got at least ten more clutched in her other hand.

Maggie has entirely no idea where she came from.

“I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to scare you. But you looked sad and marshmallows always make me feel better when I’m sad. Or popcorn,” the girl says. She talks in a clipped manner, like English isn’t her first language, but she’s spent time practicing the nuances. “At first I was afraid of the popcorn machine but now I love it.”

Maggie blinks, not sure what to make of the situation.

The girl wiggles the skewer when she doesn’t answer. “So? Want it?”

Maggie takes the offering, careful not to poke herself with the stick. “Thanks.”

The girl beams at her, gathering the rest of the ones in her hand into an even bundle before holding them out towards the fire. “Let’s cook them together! Alex likes to set them on fire all the way, but I don’t like that. You can burn them a little, but just ‘til they’re brown. That’s the best way,” the girl declares decisively, nodding in her enthusiasm. But then her face falls and she looks at Maggie in a panic. “Oh, wait! I’m Kara! I always forget that part!”

Maggie can’t help but let out a little chuckle at all the energy she has. “That’s okay. It’s nice to meet you, Kara. Thanks for sharing with me.”

Maggie tenses a little, but Kara doesn’t seem to notice her failure to introduce herself too, instead happily going on about the way to cook a perfect marshmallow. Maggie relaxes again and joins in on the toasting.

Kara only pauses her rambling when she decides her marshmallows are done, and she shoves two in her mouth so fast that Maggie worries she might choke.

“Aren’t they too hot?”

Kara shakes her head. “Nuh-uh,” she states, her mouth full. She swallows and smiles wide to prove it. “They’re the best like this!”

Maggie takes a lot more care with letting hers cool before eating it, and it seems like Kara’s polished off her entire stack before Maggie can even get hers off the stick.

It makes Maggie wonder where the kid’s parents are, and if they know just how much sugar she’s consuming.

Maybe they do, she thinks bitterly. And they just don’t care; just like nobody cares what I do anymore.

Kara throws her used skewers into the fire and then pokes Maggie in the arm with one finger. “You have that sad look again. Want to get some more food with me?”

“You can’t possibly still be hungry after all that. Besides,” Maggie eyes the crowd still gathered near the larger bonfire and the tables. “I probably shouldn’t. I don’t really know anyone here.”

Kara takes her hand and tugs. “That’s okay! Everyone is really nice here! They’ll all welcome you.”

Maggie has to dig her feet in the sand to stop herself from being pulled. Man, this kid is stronger than she looks. She wracks her brain to come up with some excuse.

“I’m not really in the mood to talk with any more people, kid. I should probably just stay here.”

Maggie’s stomach chooses that exact moment to growl loudly, the marshmallow she just ate only serving to make her hunger even more determined to make itself known. She glares down at her stomach in betrayal.

Traitor.

Kara gives her a triumphant grin, like that was all she needed to seal the deal. “C’mon,” she whines, giving Maggie the biggest puppy-dog eyes she’s ever seen. “You don’t have to talk to anyone. We can just get some food and come back here.”

And Maggie feels her mouth start to water just at the thought of real food. The half-eaten burger she'd gotten out of the trash and the granola bars she’d stolen out of somebody’s luggage and rationed over the past few days really hadn’t cut it for her. She lets Kara pull her just a step, her decision wavering.

“Pleaaaase,” Kara begs, batting her eyes. “My sister is playing a game and I don’t want to eat all by myself.”

“Fine.” Maggie caves. She can’t help it; the girl’s just too good.

“Yay!” Kara squeals, jumping up and down. She turns around and takes off, pulling Maggie with her.

It goes a lot better than Maggie’s expecting it to. They make their way over to the food tables, where Kara hands her a plate and they help each other pile them high with everything they can get their hands on. Nobody bothers them, and Maggie realizes that everybody’s too preoccupied with watching a volleyball game being played a little ways away.

Maggie catches a glimpse through the crowd and sees two girls playing against two guys. They all look about high school age from what she can tell, but Maggie gets distracted as one of the girls dives into the sand to save the ball. She manages to keep it in play, giving her partner the chance to slam it over the net and into the sand on the other side, the guys unable to save it. The girl on the ground jumps up with a whoop and high fives her partner, and a cheer washes through the crowd.

Despite the fact that the sun has long since set, the girls are both in tank tops, and Maggie can see the arm muscles and sheen of sweat reflecting in the lights strung up around them from all the way over there.

She inhales sharply and looks away, panic crawling up her spine.

The bruise on her side aches.

Kara doesn’t seem to notice anything’s amiss, focused on balancing her overloaded plate. “Do you want to eat and watch the game?” she asks.

“How about,” Maggie's voice shakes with nerves. “How about we go back to the bonfire?”

“’Kay,” Kara agrees. “It’s better over there because it’s more quiet.”

They make their way back a lot slower than before, both careful not to spill anything.

They sit down in the sand this time, and Maggie can’t help but start shoving food into her mouth right away, her panic almost completely forgotten. She’s absolutely starving. She feels a little bad about it, thoughts about table manners and making polite conversation dancing in her head, but then she notices that Kara’s doing the exact same thing she’s doing, while somehow still managing to talk a mile a minute.

Maggie slows down after eating about half her plate, not wanting to make herself sick. She sits it down next to her, and that’s when she realizes that she’s touching actual sand for the first time in her life. She runs her hand through it in awe, cupping some into her palm and letting it trickle through the gaps in her fingers.

“So are you new here then?” Kara suddenly asks, causing Maggie’s spell to be broken. Maggie looks at her with wide eyes. “’Cause you said you didn’t know anybody here,” Kara explains. “And there’re tons of people here.”

Maggie gulps, not sure what to say. She stays quiet and Kara cocks her head at her.

“You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.” Kara’s voice is gentle, and Maggie wonders how a little kid can be so perceptive. “I was new here too. But now I’m not that new.”

“Kara!”

Maggie’s saved from answering – or even asking what Kara means – by a voice calling Kara’s name. The voice is quickly followed by a person, and Maggie gulps as she recognizes the girl that scored the point in the volleyball game.

She’s in a sweatshirt now, her long hair pulled back in a ponytail, and she’s even more beautiful up close – not that, not that Maggie notices that at all.

“Hey, I was wondering where you’d gotten off to. Was it too loud again for you?” The girl plops down in the sand next to Kara, swiping a cookie off Kara’s plate.

Kara sticks her tongue out at her but makes no move to try to take the cookie back.

“It was for a little bit,” she answers quietly. She brightens up again almost instantly. “But then I came over here and made a new friend!” She turns to Maggie. “This is my sister, Alex! And Alex, this is – um…”

They both look at her in curiosity then, and Maggie knows she has no choice now.

She should probably give a fake name, something bland that they’ll never remember, just like they’ll never remember her after tonight.

She should probably say anything other than–

“I’m Maggie.”

For God’s sake, Rodas, why do you have to be so stupid?

Alex smiles at her and holds out her hand for Maggie to shake. “It’s just like Kara to not introduce herself. Nice to meet you, Maggie.”

Her hand is warm and soft when Maggie shakes it, and Maggie finds it hard to let go.

Kara pipes up again then, giving Maggie enough time to internally kick herself for her entire existence. “I did introduce myself, I swear! I just forgot a part!” she huffs indignantly.

Alex laughs and playfully shoves Kara’s shoulder. “Relax, I’m just teasing. I’m glad you found someone to keep you company. Anyway, Mom should be here soon to pick you up.”

Kara crosses her arms, eyeing Alex skeptically. “What about you?”

“I get to stay out with the big kids a little longer.” Alex grins playfully. “Unlike you, I don’t need someone to walk me home.”

“Don’t be mean,” Kara pouts. “I let you have my last cookie.”

“Oh? Well, will this make up for it?” Alex pulls something out of her sweatshirt pocket, letting it dangle from her hand for Kara to see. It glints in the light from the fire, and Maggie realizes it’s a gold medal.

“Oh!” Kara squeals, jumping and scattering what’s left on her plate around her feet. She doesn’t seem to notice as she bounces some more. “You won!”

“I told you we would. C’mere, stay still,” Alex says, holding the lanyard open and trying to thread it over the still-bouncing Kara’s head. “Lucy and I have been practicing. Nobody else in the tournament stood a chance. There we go.”

Kara holds the medal up in front of her face with both hands. “It’s pretty.”

“You can add it to your collection. How many does that make now?”

Kara stills, dropping the medal to her chest with a little thud. She seems to be thinking about it, counting out with her fingers. “Seven!” she declares proudly, holding up her hands for Alex and Maggie to see. She turns to Maggie. “I have seven medals. They’re all from Alex though. I’m not allowed to play sports yet.”

Maggie isn’t quite sure what to say to that, but Kara’s grinning so enthusiastically that she thinks not being able to play sports must not be too much of a bad thing for her. So Maggie smiles too. “That’s great!”

Kara suddenly turns and waves widely in the direction of the boardwalk. “She’s here!”

Maggie looks too and sees a woman on the boardwalk waving back at Kara. She wonders how Kara even knew she was there, because they’re too far away to hear anybody calling from over there.

“That’s your cue, Kara,” Alex tells her, seeming unfazed. “Tell Mom I just want to say goodbye to Lucy, and then I’ll be home soon.”

“Okay!” Kara drops down to her knees next to Maggie and Maggie suddenly has a faceful of blonde hair as Kara hugs her. “Bye, Maggie. Welcome to Midvale!”

Maggie winces, hoping Alex doesn’t notice. She doesn’t want everyone to know she’s new in town. “Bye, Kara,” she says sincerely, hugging back. “Nice meeting you.”

And with that, Kara takes off running, but Alex calls her back before she can get too far. “Kara, take your trash with you!”

Kara comes back full speed, gathering up her plate and her leftover food from the beach. “Sorry, bye!” This time, she makes it all the way to the boardwalk, where she stops in front of the woman, who bends down to hug her.

Something pangs in Maggie’s chest then, but she ignores it by picking up her plate and continuing to eat the rest of her food.

It’s just her and Alex now, but Alex makes no move to get up and go back to the party like Maggie’s expecting.

“So you’re new, huh?” Alex asks, sinking any hope Maggie has of not giving herself away too much. “Odd time for a vacation. It’s not really the season.”

Maggie toes the sand with her foot, not able to look at Alex. “Yeah, um...” She trails off, cringing at her own inability to come up with a good lie. “We’re just visiting.”

That’s good, Maggie. Keep it vague.

“So where are you from then?”

Shoot.

“Definitely not anywhere near the beach.” She decides to let one truth out, hoping to distract Alex from her real question. “I’ve never even seen the ocean before,” she admits.

“What?” Alex exclaims, shocked. “Really?” Maggie shakes her head. “Have you been in the water yet then?”

“No… I, uh, just got here.”

Alex stands abruptly, and then next thing Maggie knows, there’s a hand sticking up inches from her nose. She looks up, trying to read Alex’s expression. “What?”

Alex makes a come-on gesture with her hand. “You’ve never been in the ocean!” she remarks with a laugh. Maggie can tell from her tone that Alex isn’t making fun of her, and she relaxes slightly. “We have to change that!”

Maggie looks at her hand again, and then down at her pair of beat-up Converse.

“Now?” she asks.

“Yes, now!” Alex shakes her hand again. “Come on!”

And Maggie doesn’t know why, but she trusts Alex. It’s not like she has anything else to do, anyway. This could be fun.

She takes Alex’s hand.

…

Chapter Text

“Where are we going?”

Maggie considers it a very valid question considering the fact that Alex was insisting they go in the water and they’re currently headed in the opposite direction.

Still holding Maggie’s hand, Alex tugs her in the direction of the boardwalk.

“We’re going to the beach,” Alex says, not really clarifying anything. “Just not this beach. This is open to the public. If you stay here longer than one tourist season, you’ll see that all the best spots are more private.”

“Oh,” is all Maggie says. She nearly trips up the first step of the boardwalk, the wood rough and warped. She focuses hard on her feet then, trying really hard not to embarrass herself in front of Alex.

“Isn’t it kind of late to go swimming?” she asks a few minutes later, after they’ve passed some closed-up shops lining the boardwalk and Alex explained that they were closed for the winter.

You call this winter? is what Maggie truly wants to ask, but she settles on something that will make her sound less like an outsider.

“Maybe. But we won’t go in far. We can just take our shoes off.”

Maggie looks down at Alex’s feet then. “You’re not even wearing shoes.”

Alex gives her a goofy grin. “’Course not. What do you take me for? A city person? Shoes are for school and when your parents force you to go to church; that’s it.”

Alex breaks out laughing at the puzzled look on Maggie’s face. “I’m kidding! Kind of. I left my flip-flops in my friend Lucy’s bag before the game,” she explains. “I’ll probably get them back someday.”

Maggie has no idea if that’s part of the joke too, and she decides to just let the whole thing go over her head like everything else. Instead, “Didn’t you say you wanted to see Lucy before you left?”

“Eh.” Alex shrugs. “This is more important.” She points in front of them. “That’s where we’re headed.”

They reach the end of the boardwalk – or well, the boards continue on, but there’s a gate blocking the way. PRIVATE PROPERTY BEYOND THIS POINT, the sign reads. Alex swings it open and holds it out for Maggie to walk through.

“After you, mademoiselle,” she says, gesturing to the other side and bowing slightly.  

Maggie can’t help the giggle that comes out of her mouth at Alex’s antics. She steps past then looks back at Alex. “Are we allowed back here?”

“Yeah, my house is at the end,” Alex explains. “The gate doesn’t usually stop people from wandering back here in the summer or trying to sneak onto the less crowded parts of the beach, and technically, the homeowners here can only claim up to where the sand meets the water as private property. So they can’t really stop people from being in the water here, not that some of the locals don’t try. It doesn’t really affect us much because we’re all the way at the end, and my mom is usually pretty nice as long as nobody litters.”

Maggie takes in the houses they pass as Alex speaks. They’re big, what Maggie would consider more mansions than houses, and look super fancy compared to her little run-down two-story in the middle of nowhere, Nebraska.

I’m in a whole different world, she thinks. These people must be loaded.

She looks at Alex then, whose still one step ahead of her. Really takes her in, trying to figure out if she’s some rich snob in disguise. She looks normal, though, from what Maggie can tell. A worn sweatshirt and a pair of cut-off shorts, and no makeup from what Maggie’s been able to see.

And Kara had seemed pretty nice too, going out of her way to help a stranger, but that could just have been the fact that she was younger, still a kid.

Either way, Maggie decides to hold off judgment until she has more information. Kara, and now Alex too, seem friendly enough. Maybe the rich kids here weren’t like the ones at Blue Springs High. 

“We’re almost there,” Alex says, pointing to where Maggie can see the boardwalk end in a crest of sand. “That’s my house.”

The house in question is just as big as the others in the row and Maggie feels even more out of her depth.

“Do you have a big family?” she asks.

Alex leads her down some steps and back into the sand. “No, it’s just me and Kara and my mom.” She turns to face Maggie with a wide smile on her face. “You ready?”

“Yeah, just…” Maggie looks down at her jeans. There aren’t any lights here like there were on the public side, but she can still make out some things through the moonlight. “Let’s not get too wet, okay?”

“Got it. Just leave your shoes and your backpack here.”

Maggie does so, sitting down so she can untie her shoes. She stuffs her socks in them and then rolls her pant legs up to her knees. When she stands back up, the sand squishes in between her toes. It’s cold and she laughs.

“Come on, slowpoke. I’ll race you to the water.”

Maggie sees the challenge written on Alex’s face and she raises an eyebrow. “You’re on.”

Alex ends up beating her, but it’s only due to the fact that Maggie slows once they reach the wet sand. She’s startled by the sudden change in texture, and she pokes at it with her toe to test the firmness. Once she’s satisfied that it’s still sand, she follows Alex to where the waves just begin to lap at their feet.

“Ugh,” Maggie grimaces. “It’s cold.”

Alex laughs. “Don’t be a baby. You get used to it quick. It’s the initial shock.” She takes Maggie’s hand again and pulls her farther out, until they’re about shin deep.

Alex is right, after a few minutes Maggie doesn’t really feel the cold anymore. Instead, she’s fascinated by the waves washing in and then back out, pushing and then pulling against her legs.

“I can’t believe I’ve never been to the beach before,” she says in wonder. “This is so cool.”

“I can’t believe you’ve never been to the beach before,” Alex states. She gets a look of excitement on her face. “Does that mean you’ve never seen this before?” She bends down and runs her hand through the water.

Maggie bends down too, trying to see what Alex is showing her. “What?”

“Closer,” Alex says, and Maggie takes another step towards her. Alex waits until Maggie’s inches away and then Maggie’s met with a faceful of salt water as Alex splashes her.

“Hey!” She probably should have seen that one coming.

Maggie laughs, rolling up her sleeves so she can try to splash Alex back. Alex manages to dodge and they spend the next few minutes chasing each other in the surf, giggling the entire time.

They pause a moment to catch their breath and that’s when Alex takes a hard look at Maggie, her smile dropping. “What happened to your arm?” she asks.

Maggie looks too, and sees the bruise that’s revealed from her rolled-up sleeve. She can vaguely make out the fingermarks and hopes it’s too dark for Alex to really see. She yanks her sleeve back down and avoids Alex’s gaze.

“Nothing, really. There’s this tree I like to climb in my backyard even though my mom always tells me not to.” For whatever reason, the story comes easily to Maggie. “Anyway, I was climbing it and I fell when I was like ten feet up. It was stupid of me.”

Alex is quiet for a beat, but she seems to accept the explanation. “Glad you didn’t get more hurt,” is all she says.

Something brushes up against Maggie’s leg then and she squeals, lifting her foot out of the water and nearly jumping into Alex’s arms.

“There’s something on my foot!”

Alex busts out laughing, and between Maggie’s panicking and her clutching at her stomach in amusement, they both nearly tumble into the water before Alex is able to right them.

“What’s so funny?” Maggie glares at her, checking her entire leg over, but not seeing anything other than her own skin.

Alex has to catch her breath for a moment before she can answer. “Your face,” she wheezes. “It was probably just a piece of seaweed. You’re worse than some of the little kids I teach how to surf.”

“Oh. I knew that.” Maggie pushes away from Alex and puts her foot back in the water. “You teach surfing?”

“Yeah, for the past two seasons. I usually come out on my own on the weekends, and in the summer, I spend more time in the water than on land. It’s relaxing to me. I love it.” Alex’s voice takes on a melancholy tone. “My dad taught me.”

Maggie knows Alex didn’t mention her dad earlier. “Does your dad not live with you guys?”

Alex shakes her head, not meeting Maggie’s eyes. “He died,” she whispers.

“Oh,” Maggie says, like an idiot. “Alex, I’m sorr-”

Alex cuts her off with another shake of her head. “It’s fine. What about you?”

Maggie freezes like a deer caught in headlights. “Wha– what about me?”

“Do you play any sports?” Alex asks with a laugh.

Maggie feels her tension physically deflate. Alex isn’t asking about her dad. “Oh. Yeah. I run track. I mean, I used to.”

“You don’t anymore?”

“Uh, right. I, uh, didn’t make the cut.”

It’s not a total lie. Maggie had been going to all the track team’s indoor practices since the end of winter break. It kept her from going home right away after school, plus, Maggie figured out after the first week that she actually enjoyed it. The tryouts to see who made the varsity team for the upcoming season were scheduled for the last week of February. Maggie’s pretty sure she stood a chance.

But now, she realizes with a jolt, none of it matters. I’m not even in school anymore.

“Hey,” Alex says, pulling her out of her thoughts. “Are you okay? I didn’t mean to upset you.”

And that’s when Maggie realizes that she’s crying. A fat, dumb tear rolls down her cheek and she sniffs hastily and wipes it away. If only her problems were as little as not making the track team. “Yeah, no, I’m fine. It’s nothing.”

Alex looks like she’s about to call Maggie out on the blatant lie, but they’re both startled by a beeping coming from Alex’s wristwatch.

Alex glances at it and curses under her breath. “That’s my curfew alarm,” she explains. “I gotta go, or my mom will kill me.”

Alex starts heading back up the beach to Maggie’s stuff, and Maggie follows, her heart sinking even more. She can feel a breakdown coming on and she grits her teeth, willing herself to hold it together until Alex’s gone.

But that’s part of the problem. She doesn’t know what she’ll do once Alex leaves.

They reach Maggie’s shoes too fast and Alex picks them up for her and hands them to her along with her backpack. “I’m sorry I have to rush out like this. Will you make it back all right by yourself? You know where you’re going?”

“Yeah,” Maggie lies again. “I’ll be fine. Thanks for showing me around.”

Alex smiles. “It was fun.” She glances up at her house before looking back at Maggie. “Will I see you again this weekend?”

“Maybe–” Alex suddenly pulls her into a hug, arm hitting Maggie’s bruised ribs. Maggie gasps and tries to cover it up by slinging one arm around Alex. Her shoes dangling from her hand awkwardly hit Alex in the back.

“Sorry,” Maggie manages a laugh, pulling back. “See you around, Alex.”

Alex laughs too. “Bye, Maggie. You know where to find me if you wanna hang.”

And then Alex is walking away, back up the steps and up the path that leads to her house. Maggie watches her until she’s gone. A light comes on in the house where Alex must enter from the back.

And then that’s it.

Maggie’s alone.

The night with Kara and Alex had been a fun distraction, but now it’s back to her cold, hard reality.

Her shoelaces slip out of her grip, along with her backpack strap, and Maggie follows suit, dropping heavily to the sand.

A bone-deep exhaustion suddenly washes over her. Maybe she’ll just stay in this spot forever, until all her problems disappear.

She doesn’t know what to do next. Her plan had been to get as far away from Nebraska as possible, but now that she’s accomplished that, her only plan is to not get caught. She doesn’t know how far her dad’s law enforcement connections can reach, but he’s bound to have reported her missing by now.

And that means if she gets caught, she’ll be in the police’s system, and it’ll be a one-way trip back to Blue Springs for her.

That’s assuming he even cares enough to report me.

Maggie pulls her knees into her chest, feeling tears sting her eyes. Her chin quivers and she tries with every ounce of strength she has to stop herself from crying. But -

She’s running upstairs and grabbing her backpack, wrenching it open and stuffing whatever she can get into it. Her heart’s in her throat and her side is screaming and there’s still shouting coming from the kitchen, and banging.

"Stop it, Oscar! She’s confused; she doesn’t know what she’s saying!” A pause. No response that she can hear. “She’s still your daughter!”

“THAT IS NO DAUGHTER OF MINE!”

And then the pounding starts coming up the stairs and she doesn’t think – she just bolts.

Out the window and down the tree and through the yard and away, away, away; propelled by fear and the icy knowledge that there’s no coming back from this.

Not with her dad’s sentence sinking into her bones and twisting into every cell of her being, like poison.

So she runs, and runs, and runs, and she doesn’t look back, not once, not ever.

Maggie buries her face in her arms as the first sob overtakes her, making her ribs throb in pain.

She doesn’t know how long she sits on the beach like that, crying, and she tries to be quiet, not wanting anyone to hear her.

When there are no more tears left, she sits up, wiping her face with her sweatshirt sleeve. Then she wipes the loose sand off her feet and shoves her socks back on, and then her shoes, rolling her pant legs back down.

Her movements are rough and she’s not gentle with herself, but Maggie can hardly bring herself to care right now.

She doesn’t know why exactly, but she has to. Keep. Going.

She’s tired. It’s dark and it’s late, she’s in an unknown town with no idea what places are safe. She managed to get food for the night, but that was just due to dumb luck and good timing. She should have asked Alex if she knew any good camping spots on the beach, but that would have been giving too much away.

She grabs her backpack and stands up, walking to the stairs that Alex had used to leave. And that’s when she sees it.

Where the boards meet rock and sand, there’s a little alcove underneath.

It’s partially hidden by the grass from the dune, but when Maggie bends down for a closer look, she can see a crawlspace big enough for a small person.

A person like me, she thinks, sniffling.

She kneels down again and fumbles through her backpack, feeling for her flashlight. The batteries are weak but it lights up the empty space when she finds it. There’s nothing but sand and a forgotten Frisbee, and the boards over it keep it protected from the sky.

Maggie shrugs. Ah, what the heck.

She throws her backpack in first and then crawls after it. The sand’s even colder there than out on the beach, but Maggie figures it’s better than nothing. She makes sure her sweatshirt’s zipped tight and pulls her hood up. Then she lies down on her good side, using her backpack as a pillow.  

Sleep creeps over her fast, which is no surprise considering how little she’d managed to get in the rocky undercarriage of the bus ride, trying to keep suitcases from crushing her.

She shifts a little to ease the pressure off her hurt ribs. Then she lets her eyes close.

She’s asleep within minutes, for better or for worse.

She’ll deal with whatever comes tomorrow.

…

Chapter Text

February 17^th

“You know, I distinctly remember telling you last night that this is private property.”

Maggie wakes up with a startled gasp. Her mind sluggishly registers that someone has just spoken, but the message and voice are lost to the haze of unconsciousness. Still, she’s pretty sure whoever it was is too close for comfort, and she’s on her feet instantly, remembering at the last possible second where exactly she is.

Not the bus. On the beach. Under the–

She narrowly avoids bashing her head against the rafters above her as she stills in a crouch, the blood rushing in her ears. She squints her eyes against the harsh morning sun coming from the opening she had crawled into last night. She can’t see anything out there and there’s nowhere to go except back out, so Maggie grabs her backpack and moves, tensing her body in preparation to run.

The sight she’s met with is not one she was at all expecting to find, and it stops her in her tracks, heart still pounding a mile a minute and brain still trying to process the situation from her abrupt awakening.

Alex, in a wetsuit and hair dripping on the sand, is sitting with her back against the nearest beam staring out at the ocean, surfboard propped beside her.

Alex doesn’t say anything, although she registers the fact that Maggie is now standing beside her with a flick of her eyes. Maggie realizes that it was Alex who had spoken and that whatever she had said was directed at Maggie.

She can’t read Alex’s expression. Instead, she winces and clenches her hand to her ribs as she registers the pain her jerky movement moments prior had caused.

Alex still hasn’t said anything, and Maggie’s confusion wins over her alarm of being caught.

“You scared me!” she tells Alex.

Defensiveness is all she really can come up with right now.

“How do you think I felt when I was on my way back inside for breakfast and I see your sneakers underneath the stairs?” Alex finally looks at her, some kind of steel in her eyes. “I thought you were dead!”

And just like that, the anger’s gone. Maggie shrinks under Alex’s tone and a wave of guilt washes over her for causing Alex to worry about something like that. “I’m sorry,” she says quietly. “I didn’t think about that.”

Alex eyes her for a moment, and then her voice softens for some reason. “Don’t be sorry. But what’s going on, Maggie? What are you still doing here?”

Now Maggie is the one not looking at Alex. She kicks the sand and watches the tip of her shoe disappear in the grains. Now that she’s thinking of it, she can feel sand everywhere. In her clothes, in her shoes, in her hair. It makes her feel gross, inside and out.

Alex is still waiting for an answer.

“It’s nothing,” Maggie finally says. “I’ll just be going.”

She turns, ready to run again, but a hand on her wrist stops her.

“Wait,” Alex pleads. “Maggie. Sit with me for a second. Talk to me. Please.”

And Maggie doesn’t know why, but she lets Alex pull her down so they’re sitting next to each other. Thinks it has something to do with the way her skin tingles under the gentle pressure of Alex’s touch, a tingling that has nothing to do with the bruise further down her arm. Something to do with the way Alex’s eyes beg her to stay, in a way Maggie can’t resist.

So she sits, but she stays quiet. Pokes at the sand with her fingers. She’s trembling, her adrenaline still high with the overwhelming need to flee.

“Okay,” Alex blows out a breath after a few more minutes, after Maggie can’t bring herself to find her voice or meet Alex’s gaze. “How about I talk and you can tell me if I’m wrong?”

Maggie shrugs, wondering where Alex is going with this.

“Kara said last night that she could sense you were in some kind of trouble, and I know she seems like just a little kid, but she’s very, very good at reading people and she has a lot of experience with loss.”

Maggie’s shoulders hunch even further in on herself and she finds herself trying to hide behind her too-short hair, feeling even smaller than when the bullies at school used to pick on her. Kara could tell just from the hour we probably spent together?

Alex keeps talking. “And from what I’ve seen, you’re scared of something. And if I really have to guess, you’re scared of whatever caused this.”

Alex gently takes Maggie’s hand and peels her sleeve up, revealing the bruise she had noticed the night before.

It’s just starting to turn an array of different colors, and the distinct pattern of fingers are clear in the bright sunlight.

It’s ugly, and the sight of it brings a whole slew of bad feelings that try to hook their claws in Maggie’s brain.

Try to paralyze her.

Alex ghosts her fingertips over the marks and Maggie snaps out of it as her whole body shudders.

“And I don’t think that’s the only injury you have,” Alex continues, looking pointedly to where Maggie still has her other hand pressed against her side. “You lied about going back to where you’re staying and spent the night here instead. So now I just need you to tell me why so I can figure out a way to help you.”

Maggie feels like she’s missing something because there’s no way that makes sense. Why would Alex want to help her?

Alex tilts her head in a So? kind of gesture. Maggie realizes that she’s serious.

“You can’t,” she whispers.

“What?”

“You can’t help me,” Maggie repeats, yanking her arm out of Alex’s grasp. “I’m not gonna get you in trouble too.”

Alex seems nonplussed, like she really is only trying to understand what’s going on. “Get in trouble how? Please, Maggie, if you would just talk to me-”

“I didn’t have anywhere else to go!” Maggie shouts, her voice cracking slightly. Her trembling increases, her whole body shaking.

“That’s why I slept here. I was tired and didn’t know what else to do, okay? I didn’t plan to when you left, I didn’t mean for anyone to find me, and I didn’t mean to scare you. But I don’t even know where I am and I didn’t know where else to go!”

Maggie hiccups on the last word, and oh, she’s crying again. She’s breaking down right in front of Alex and there’s nothing she can do to stop it.

Alex seems just as shocked by her outburst as Maggie, frozen in place for a beat, but then Maggie gasps on a sob, and Alex is moving, wrapping her arms around Maggie in a gentle hug. Maggie tries to push away, but Alex just holds on tighter, and Maggie eventually gives in, her desperate need for comfort rising above all.

Alex is speaking gently to her as she cries, but Maggie’s in too much pain to register the words. Sometime later, when Maggie has gotten better control of herself and is able to lean back to wipe her eyes, she takes in what Alex is saying.

“It’s gonna be okay, Maggie. I’ll help you and we can figure something out. We can go get my mom and you can explain to her. She’ll help–”

“No!” Maggie scrambles back, away, away, away, her eyes wide.

Alex jumps too at Maggie’s sudden movement, her brow crinkling in confusion.

“You can’t tell anyone about me, Alex. I mean it. Not your mom, not Kara. No one. You have to promise me. Or I have to leave right now and find somewhere else to go. They’ll just send me back, and I can’t go back there. I just can’t. You have to promise me.”

Maggie’s shaking again and Alex quickly speaks before she can break down again.

“Okay, Maggie, okay. I hear you,” Alex says, reaching out like she wants to touch Maggie again, but hesitating this time. “I won’t tell. I won’t tell anyone. It’s okay. I just want to help you, I promise.”

Some bitter part of Maggie’s soul questions just exactly why Alex wants to help a random stranger she’s known for less than twenty-four hours, but she stays quiet. Instead, she takes some deep breaths to calm herself back down. All of these emotions are making her exhausted, heavy with fatigue.

Alex lets her just breathe for a few minutes, but judging from the fact that the crinkle is still present on Alex’s forehead, she’s thinking hard about something. It doesn’t take long for Maggie to find out, though.

“I’m meeting my friend Lucy for lunch today. Why don’t you come with us?” Seeing Maggie about to object, Alex rushes to voice her full plan. “We don’t have to talk about anything with her. I can just get you some lunch and keep you company and maybe you’ll feel a little better. And then maybe we can come up with a plan afterward.”

Maggie doesn’t immediately turn it down, and so Alex keeps talking. “And until then, there’s a public bathroom on the boardwalk that you can use. It’s got showers and a locker room and everything. After we’re done here, why don’t you go there and get cleaned up and I can meet you around there at, say, like noon? How does that sound?”

Maggie mulls it over for a few seconds, but really, the decision’s already made. The promise of a shower and some food is too good an opportunity to pass up. Still, she gives Alex a little resistance. “I don’t have any money,” she admits. “I can’t pay for lunch.”

“Don’t worry about that,” Alex says gently. “Let me take care of it. It’s no problem.”

“Fine. We can do that,” Maggie agrees, sniffling.

Alex gives her another hug, then pulls away to look at her watch. “My mom and Kara will start looking for me soon for breakfast. I’ll meet you on the boardwalk at twelve, okay?” She looks at Maggie’s hands, inspecting them for something. “Do you have a watch?” she asks.

Maggie shakes her head. Her watch had been left in her gym bag – abandoned somewhere in the front hallway of her house – having stored it in there during her final track practice before her world turned upside down. In retrospect, she was lucky she had changed back into her jeans and clean shirt before leaving school that day. Otherwise, she’d have been in her sweaty gym shorts and t-shirt when she’d gotten home, and probably would have frozen in the cold Nebraskan air before she’d even made it to the bus stop that night.

Alex takes off her wristwatch and presses a few buttons before handing it to Maggie. “There, I turned off all the alarms. It’s waterproof too, so you don’t have to worry about it getting wet.”

Maggie shakes her head. “I can’t–”

“Sure you can.” Alex presses the watch into Maggie’s hands. “I’ll get another one.”

Maggie fastens it around her wrist, seeing that Alex isn’t going to take no for an answer.

“You know how to find the bathroom I’m talking about? It’s right by the pier, you can’t miss it.”

Maggie nods. “I’ll find it. Thank you.”

“No problem.” Alex grins, standing up and stretching before grabbing her board. “See you later?”

“Yeah,” Maggie says. “See you around, Alex.”

…

She finds the bathroom Alex is talking about without an issue, and almost cries in relief when she sees the shower stalls with their own soap dispensers and separate changing areas behind a curtain. She takes what is probably the longest shower of her life, the water nice and hot, making sure she cleans all the sand from her body and hair. Then she shakes off her clothes and blows her hair dry using the hand dryer located on the wall, which has a nozzle that conveniently twists up to allow people to dry their hair.

Maggie almost never wants to leave the bathroom, it’s so nice, but a group of women in wetsuits coming in propels her back out into the world after her hair is dry. She doesn’t want to linger and draw unnecessary attention to herself. She has a feeling she’ll be making use of that bathroom a lot more in the future.

After that, Maggie leaves the boardwalk and wanders around the downtown streets nearby, walking past the many shops and restaurants opening up for the day. Her mouth starts watering the second she passes a bakery, the delicious smells coming from it making her stomach clench in want.  She reminds herself that she just has to wait for Alex, and then she can finally get some food.

As the day starts picking up, more and more people are out and about, and Maggie decides to head back to the beach to try to stay out of the way while she waits. She passes by a newspaper stand and she grabs one before she heads back to the benches she had noticed by the pier.

She claims one far in a corner and opens up the paper, intent on learning as much as she can about this place. Midvale Times, it reads, and Maggie remembers Kara welcoming her to Midvale last night. The second thing she notices is the location in the byline on the first page.

California.

It really isn’t a surprise, all things considered. Still, the confirmation that that’s where she is gives Maggie pause, and she can’t help but laugh out loud at the absurdity of it all.

Her dream had always been to come to California someday, but she never thought in a million years that she’d ever make it out of Nebraska to do so.

It was something that she and Eliza had fantasized about, going to college in California, getting out of the middle of nowhere and making their way in the big city.

Something in her chest clenches. Thinking about anything dealing with Eliza is a bad idea right now.

She spends the next hour or so devouring everything written in the paper, trying to keep herself distracted from all thoughts as her stomach continues to grumble. Somehow, she succeeds, because the next thing she knows, she’s being tackled by a blur with blonde hair, the paper crumbling between them.

“Maggie!”

Maggie realizes who it is and shakes off her surprise with a laugh as Kara squeezes her tight. “Hi, Kara.”

Alex comes up to them then, not as fast as her excited little sister. She must see Maggie wince as Kara accidentally brushes her ribs, for her jaw clenches hard. “Let her go, Kara,” Alex commands softly, making it sound teasing. “You’re squishing her.”

Kara does so, grinning up at Maggie, so Maggie does her best to grin back.

“You’re coming to eat with us?” Kara asks.

“Yeah,” Maggie says, glancing at Alex for reassurance. “If you guys’ll have me.”

“Yay!” Kara grabs Maggie’s hand, pulling her off the bench. “Let’s go!”

Alex snags the crumbled newspaper off the bench and throws it in a garbage can they pass, seemingly indifferent to Kara’s excitement. “My mom asked me to take Kara with me,” she explains to Maggie. “Lucy’s going to meet us there.”

‘There’ turns out to be a little diner that’s not too crowded, easing Maggie’s nerves slightly. She still doesn’t feel good about Alex buying her food, but she’s so hungry now that she knows she won’t resist at all.

They grab a booth near the back, Maggie sliding in after Kara on one side, and Alex tells the waitress that they’re waiting for one more. Kara opens the menu up in front of her, excitedly kicking her legs as she looks it over. “How much can I get, Alex?” she asks.

Alex trades out her menu for a kid’s one. “Remember what we said back at the house, Kara?” she asks, in a tone that implies they discussed this earlier.

Kara nods solemnly, the excitement seeming to drain out of her. “I need to be more normal.”

“No, that’s not-” Alex sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose, her expression pained. Maggie looks back and forth between the two, not quite certain what’s going on. “I said that if you just get a kid’s meal, we could make something together at home if you’re still hungry later, remember?”

But Kara doesn’t seem to be listening any longer, her attention drawn to the door, where seconds later the bell chimes as someone comes in. Kara’s climbing over Maggie and out the booth before Maggie can even blink. “Lucy!”

And then Kara’s running over and greeting the person that just came in as enthusiastically as she had Maggie. Maggie gets her first good look at Lucy at that moment and recognizes her as the other girl from the volleyball game.

Lucy walks over, swinging her hand with Kara’s, and she waves at Alex before sitting down in the booth beside her. She smiles at Maggie and Maggie fidgets under her gaze, finding herself suddenly flustered.

Because, oh – Lucy’s just as pretty as Alex is – and oh, Maggie can’t be thinking like that. She presses hard on her bruised arm with her thumb to stop her suddenly wandering thoughts.

“Lucy, this is Maggie,” Alex introduces them. “And Maggie, this is my friend, Lucy.”

“Nice to meet you, Maggie.” Lucy greets her. She shoots a playful smile towards Alex. “Now I know why you didn’t come back after the game last night.”

Alex makes a strangled noise and elbows Lucy hard in the ribs, but Lucy just laughs.

The waitress comes to take their orders then, and by the time she’s gone, Alex’s cheeks have gone back to their normal color and Maggie has been distracted enough that she forgets to ask what Lucy meant.

Kara, having ordered a kid’s burger with extra onion rings with a nod from Alex, starts telling them all about the science fair project she’s working on in school, and so it isn’t until their food arrives and Kara’s too busy shoving fries in her mouth from the large plate Alex had ordered for the table that any of other three really get to speak.

“So Maggie, what brings you to Midvale? Did you just move in?” Lucy asks.

“Um…” Maggie swallows a big gulp of her water in an effort to buy herself some time. It doesn’t work.  “Something like that.”

Mental note: get better at lying, you idiot.

Alex chimes in then, proving a little that she really isn’t trying to let Maggie’s secret out. “Maggie’s never been to the beach before this, can you believe that?”

Lucy seems to light up at that, for whatever reason. “My dad’s in the army,” she tells Maggie. “We move around a lot; this is the longest we’ve ever stayed in one place. He says he wants me to finish high school in the same school. But before this, we’d only ever been to the beach a couple of times. So I was pretty new too.” She stabs her thumb in Alex’s direction. “This one had to teach me how to swim.”

Alex smiles, waving Lucy off. “You knew how, you just needed a few pointers in ocean safety.”

Maggie isn’t really sure what to say in this conversation, so she takes a page out of Kara’s book, stuffing her mouth with her burger. She tries to eat slow, not wanting to let on how hungry she is or that this is her first meal of the day.

Alex and Lucy start talking about some school assignment next, which makes Maggie relax slightly, glad the topic’s moved away from her. She finishes up her burger, then demolishes the onion rings she ordered with it. When those are gone, she reaches for the last couple fries in the middle of the table, but bumps into Kara’s hand, who’s reaching for the same thing.

Before Maggie can even retract her hand, Alex shoots Kara a look, and Kara’s pushing the plate towards Maggie. She splits them up instead with a wink at Kara, earning herself a delighted smile as they both stuff the last of the fries in their mouths.

Lucy laughs as she notices. “Keep that up and you’ll be Kara’s friend for life.”

“Maggie already is my friend,” Kara informs Lucy. “We made marshmallows together last night.”

After lunch, the group heads over to a nearby arcade, neither Lucy nor Alex wanting to go home to do homework. Kara excitedly ropes Maggie into playing several games with her, including a car racing game and her favorite, the one inside a rocket ship-shaped console.

(“It’s not a real space ship,” she whispers to inform Maggie right before they sit down.)

Then the four of them have an air hockey tournament, although both Alex and the guy behind the counter seem hesitant to let Kara play at first. Alex relents after Kara promises to be really careful and the guy mutters something about still needing to get the ceiling tiles fixed from last time.

(Lucy ends up the champion, much to Alex’s chagrin.)

Eventually, Alex and Maggie get a quick moment alone. Alex tells Maggie she has an idea if Maggie wants to sleep on the beach again, although Maggie makes no promises, not sure if she really wants to drag Alex further into her mess.

She really needs to come up with a plan.

When Alex, Kara, and Lucy declare that they really have to start heading home, Alex slips Maggie a ten-dollar bill with a whispered instruction to get some dinner. Maggie tries to give it back, but Kara comes over to give her a goodbye hug then, and Alex uses the chance to tuck the bill in Maggie’s backpack.

Then with a “See you later,” and a meaningful look from Alex, they go their separate ways, Lucy heading to the lot where she parked her car and Kara and Alex back to the boardwalk. Maggie walks in what she hopes is a meaningful direction, wandering around for a few hours before she caves and uses the money Alex gave her to buy something to eat.

She keeps the change, intending to give it back to Alex later.

She tries not to think about the fact that it means she’s already decided she’s going to go back tonight.

The sun is setting when Maggie makes her way back to the beach behind Alex’s house, the shadows long and drawn out in the sand. She startles as she comes down the steps and notices a person sitting there, but relaxes as she realizes that it’s just Alex.

Alex seems surprised to see her too. “Maggie!” She seems to sigh in relief. “I didn’t know if you were going to come back.”

Maggie looks down at the sand. “I didn’t either. But it’s not like I know anywhere else to go.”

“Well, I’m really glad you did. I’d rather know you were here and safe than who-knows-where,” Alex says, making Maggie’s face heat up for whatever reason. “And look at what I did!” Alex exclaims brightly, gesturing to the little hideaway.

Maggie realizes that there’s now a surfboard propped up lengthwise under the boardwalk, forming a makeshift wall where the dune grass doesn’t cover the opening underneath the steps. It makes it even harder to see inside, and Maggie’s sure it’ll provide extra protection from the wind.

“I used to keep a spare board there all the time,” Alex explains. “My mom might get mad at me if she notices I’m doing it again, but she won’t do anything, and it’s an old board, so it’s not like it matters. And this way, nobody will see you. And look what I did inside.”

Maggie crouches down and peers in, her eyes trying to adjust to the darkness. Alex helps by turning on a flashlight and shining it inside for her.

Alex has been busy. There’s a sleeping bag inside, laying on top of what looks like an old tarp. The sleeping bag itself is wrapped in a thick garbage bag, and there’s another bag that seems to have been nailed to the bottom side of the boards overtop their heads.

“Alex…” Maggie isn’t sure what to say. She knows some kind of thank you would be appropriate, but she’s so overwhelmed with gratitude that she doesn’t think she’ll be able to talk without bursting into tears for another time today. So she says nothing.

“It’s really not that much,” Alex says, pushing some loose hair behind her ear. “Just some old stuff from our garage that nobody’ll miss. We can tweak the setup if something doesn’t work. But I figure it’s enough to get you started until we can figure out what to do.”

Maggie notices the inclusive “we”, but makes no comment. She decides she can let Alex help her out a for a little while, and then once she figures out a more concrete plan than “hide-from-everyone-until-she-turns-eighteen-and-then-nobody-can-force-her-to-go-back-to-her-parents,” she can leave and let Alex go back to her normal life without any trouble.

It’s not like Alex knows anything about her other than her first name and that she’s on the run anyway, and Maggie plans to keep it that way.

“My mom doesn’t come out here that much anymore. I think it makes her remember my dad too much,” Alex tells Maggie. “And Kara never comes here in the morning and she knows to never touch one of my surfboards, so you should be safe here for the most part. Most of our neighbors don’t live here in the winter and the rest are rental properties, so you’ll only have to be careful moving around here at night, in case my mom or Kara are hanging around, but other than that, you should be okay. And I’ll check up on you as much as possible. I’m already down here enough as it is; no one will think twice about it.”

“Thank you,” Maggie says quietly.

Alex shrugs off her gratitude. “It’s no problem. I’ll be out early tomorrow morning, maybe I can snag you something to eat for breakfast.”

“Okay,” Maggie says. “So I’ll see you tomorrow?”

She needs a promise, something real, something definite, something she can look forward to.

“Yeah, of course.” Alex smiles, and then she’s pulling Maggie into a hug before Maggie has a chance to react. “I need to go now, but have a good night, Maggie. Sweet dreams.”

Maggie’s whole body tingles with warmth and she inhales deeply, returning the hug.

“’Night, Alex.”

…

Chapter Text

February 18^th

Maggie sleeps like a baby that night. The sleeping bag is comfortable and it, combined with the tarp, keeps the chill from the ground from creeping up on her. The surfboard wall also blocks the wind that she had felt the previous night, and the whole set-up and restful sleep do wonders for Maggie’s spirits.

She wakes early, the same as the day before, but still not as early as Alex. There’s a brown paper bag waiting for her when she crawls outside, with Breakfast for Maggie :) scribbled in messy handwriting. Inside is a bagel with cream cheese, a banana, granola bar, juice box, and a bottle of water. Maggie smiles big when she sees it all.      

Alex is still out in the water, and Maggie sits and watches as she eats. She’s never seen someone surf in person before, and she watches in awe as Alex moves through the waves. If she thought Alex was beautiful playing in that volleyball game, this is a whole new level. Her movements are fluid and graceful and – Maggie doesn’t let those thoughts get too far in her head.

When Alex comes back on shore, she waves at Maggie, surfboard tucked under her arm. Maggie waves back, unable to keep the grin off her face.

“Morning,” Alex calls out when she gets close, sticking her board in the sand before wiping her face off with her towel. She looks at Maggie and laughs. “Looks like somebody’s in a good mood today.”

Maggie can’t help but smile wider. “I slept good. And thanks for the food.”

“I’m so glad. So it was okay in there? The sleeping bag doesn’t smell bad, does it? It’s kind of old and I was a little worried.”

“No, it’s perfect. Seriously, Alex. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Alex says, scrubbing at her wet hair with the towel. “So hey, I was wondering if you wanted to hang out again today? Lucy and I’ve got some homework to do, and I was thinking of going to the library to do it. Kara usually comes too.”

“Sounds good to me. I’m in.”

…

A few hours later, Maggie meets Alex and Kara at the boardwalk again. Lucy shows up a few minutes later and they all walk to the nearby library together. It’s nice and quiet and has tons of books, and they all spend some time browsing the shelves and checking out a few things before Alex leads them up to the second floor.

There’s a sign that declares the whole floor a study area and that conversation is allowed. They head to what Alex and Lucy call their ‘favorite corner’ – a spacious table in the back next to some giant beanbag chairs. The area is secluded and far enough in the back that no one else is around and Maggie can see why they like it.

Alex and Lucy sit down at the table, setting out the textbooks they brought with them to work on their homework together. Maggie plops down on the beanbag near one end of the table, curling up with one of the books she found that Alex had checked out for her.

She doesn’t open the book yet though, instead focusing on Kara, who’s been uncharacteristically quiet so far that day. Kara sits at the table across from Alex and opens the book on painting that she had gotten, but it looks to Maggie like she has trouble focusing on it. Maggie wants to ask if she’s okay, but decides against it, thinking that Kara probably doesn’t want to talk about it.

She does, however, ask Alex if everything’s okay sometime later, after Lucy declares that she’s going to the bathroom and Kara goes along.

Alex is frowning down at some complicated math problem that she and Lucy can’t seem to get an answer for that they agree on. She erases something and continues scribbling away as she answers Maggie. “She’s okay. She has days like this sometimes, where she doesn’t want to talk much. She says sometimes things can be too overwhelming for her. It’s why I figured we could come to the library today. She likes it here, how quiet it is.”

When Kara and Lucy come back to the table, Kara makes a beeline straight for Alex, climbing onto her lap and burying her face in Alex’s neck. Alex puts her pencil down and shifts Kara on her lap a little. “You okay, Kara?” she asks.

Kara shakes her head but doesn’t say anything. Alex looks to Lucy.

“There’s someone using that awful squeaky chalkboard by the bathroom,” Lucy says. Alex nods.

“Grab her bag for me, will you?” She asks Lucy, gesturing to Kara’s backpack hanging on her chair.

Lucy does, and Alex opens up the main compartment and takes out a stuffed animal. It’s an orange stuffed cat with a red ribbon tied around its neck.

“Here, Kara,” Alex says. She runs the cat’s paw across Kara’s bare arm, prompting Kara to lift up her head to look. Kara takes the cat as soon as she sees it, hugging it tightly.

“Do you want to go home?” Alex asks quietly, but Kara just shakes her head and turns around on her lap so she’s facing the table too. She keeps running her fingers through the cat’s fur and leans back so she’s resting against Alex’s chest. She picks Alex’s pencil up and hands it back to her sister, and Alex shoots Maggie a smile that everything’s okay as she and Lucy go back to doing their math problems.

Maggie goes back to reading, and she’s more than halfway through the book and fully engrossed in the story when a loud gasp from Kara startles her.

She looks up and sees that Kara’s glasses have slipped down her nose. Her gaze is entirely focused on Maggie. The orange cat has fallen to the floor and Kara whimpers before pushing her glasses up with shaky hands, squeezing her eyes shut.

Before Alex can react, Kara slips out of her grasp and curls up underneath the table, her hands over her ears. Alex is quick to follow her onto the floor. She crouches by her side, seeming hesitant to touch now, and whispers something that Maggie can’t hear.

Kara says something back to Alex. Maggie tries her best to follow Lucy’s example, who’s still working on the table and giving Kara her privacy. But she can’t help but notice when Kara says something which causes Alex to turn in her direction for a second with a frown before she nods at Kara.

A few minutes later, Kara crawls out from under the table, Alex right behind her. She picks the cat up off the ground and stands in front of Maggie. She holds the stuffed animal out, her expression pained.

At that moment, Maggie realizes that Kara’s sadness seems to be for her.

“Um,” Maggie says, not sure what Kara wants her to do.

Alex steps in with a smile towards Maggie. Her face is pained too, although she’s doing a better job at hiding it. “Kara wants you to take Streaky.”

“Streaky?”

“Her cat,” Alex explains. Kara pulls on Alex’s sleeve until she leans down for Kara to whisper in her ear. “Uh, she says that he helps people feel better and so she wants you to have him.”

Maggie looks at Kara, touched but puzzled. “I’m okay, Kara. You should keep him; he’s yours.”

Kara shakes her head, holding the cat out even closer to Maggie, tears starting up in the corner of her eyes. When she sees that, Maggie takes the cat and cradles it close to her chest, not wanting to upset Kara further. “Thank you. I’ll take good care of him, okay?”

Kara smiles just a little bit and whispers to Alex again.

“She also wants to know if she can sit with you while Lucy and I finish up.”

Maggie tilts her head, motioning to the giant beanbag. There’s plenty of room for two. “Of course.”

Without further ado, Kara plops down, practically on top of Maggie. She curls up against Maggie’s side, resting her head against Maggie’s shoulder.

Maggie looks to Alex for reassurance, who mouths, she’s okay. “Don’t bug her too much, Kara,” she says out loud before sitting back down at the table. Lucy scoots the math book she’s been hogging in Alex’s absence back between them.

 Kara seems content now, so Maggie goes back to her book, nestling Streaky in between them.

Kara stays quiet the rest of the time they spend together, but she seems calmer, and she perks up tremendously when Alex lets them stop for ice cream once they leave the library. When it’s time to say goodbye, Kara gives Maggie the hug she’s expecting, but Kara’s touch is almost feather-light this time, like she’s being extra careful for some reason. She also won’t let Maggie give Streaky back, and only stops squint-glaring at Maggie for the give-back attempt after Maggie tucks him carefully into her backpack.

That night, Maggie hugs Streaky tight to her chest as she falls asleep, surprisingly glad for the comfort he provides.

…

March 2^nd

Maggie learns a lot about living on the streets over the following two weeks. Some of these things include:

1. A lone kid with a backpack wandering around in the middle of a school day by themselves can raise a few suspicions with “concerned citizens.”
2. A lot of people in Midvale can be classified as such – to the point of just being downright nosy.
3. Telling people you’re homeschooled and running errands for your sick mother gets a lot of people to back off. Pretending to not understand English and replying in rapid-fire Spanish also seems to do the trick.
4. When you live in a beach town, there’s no escaping the sand. It’s everywhere. In your clothes, in your hair, in your soul.
5. You’re always hungry. And there’s a particular kind of hunger that you only truly experience when you don’t know when your next meal will be.

Maggie knows she wouldn’t have made it a day without Alex. Alex who gave her a safe place to sleep and brings her food whenever possible and some money to spend when it isn’t. Alex stops by in the morning with breakfast when she can, as she can’t always surf in the morning on a school day. Some days are like the first, where Maggie’s still asleep and only knows Alex comes when she finds the brown bag with a little note waiting for her when she wakes up. Some days she’s awake and they spend a few minutes chatting together before Lucy comes to pick Alex and Kara up for school. Alex doesn’t always manage to check on Maggie in the evenings throughout the week, so Maggie tries hard to ensure that she’s awake when Alex comes to visit in the morning, wanting to spend more time with her.

Maggie also realizes how quickly dirt can creep up on her, wearing the same clothes day after day, spending most of the time outdoors. She does her best to keep herself as clean as possible, utilizing the public locker rooms scattered along the boardwalk to the best of her advantage.

(She tries not to use the same one too many times in a row, in case someone notices a routine.)

It’s in one of these locker rooms that she finds a beach towel left neatly folded and forgotten on a bench, and she claims it in a blink of an eye, feeling like she just found treasured gold. She uses it to shower and wash her hair every day and lay out on the beach like she sees other people do.

She’s also very thankful that she managed to throw two clean pairs of underwear and socks in her backpack before she left home. This is where she really uses the bathrooms to her advantage, washing out her underwear and socks from the day before using the soap and dryers. She cleans her sweatshirt, t-shirt, and jeans to the best of her ability this way too. She knows wearing the same outfit over and over is bad enough, but having dirty or smelly clothes is really asking for unwanted attention.

She spends the rest of her time alone wandering around Midvale, careful not to stay in one spot for too long or frequent the same spots over and over again. When she gets too leery of people watching her, or happens to see a police officer out on patrol, she heads back to the beach through one of the many paths she’s found throughout Alex’s neighborhood. There she sits just inside her cave – as Alex and she have taken to calling it – and reads one of the books Alex lends her or goes about tidying up her little space.

She packs the sand under her sleeping bag into a makeshift bed and pillow shape and carefully arranges the things she doesn’t need to carry around with her all the time in the watertight box Alex had given her. It isn’t much: her spare flashlight (with fresh batteries), some rope she had found in her bag, any book from Alex that she’s not currently reading, an extra trash bag, and an extra bottle of water (for emergencies). Everything else she owns: her spare underwear and socks, lighter, Alex’s flashlight, old Swiss Army knife, newfound towel, main water bottle (which she refills whenever she passes by a water fountain), and – most importantly – Streaky, all stay with her in her backpack. She’s got some change from the money Alex’s given her and some miscellaneous protein bars, and that’s about it.

Maggie also learns about Alex, Kara, and Lucy.

1. Alex and Kara’s last name is Danvers, and their mom is a doctor at the hospital.
2. Kara is adopted and has been part of the Danvers family for just over two years now.
3. Lucy is Lucy Lane, and yes, sister of Lois Lane (Lucy rolls her eyes as she says this, and then proceeds to look absolutely delighted when Maggie asks if she’s supposed to know who that is.)
4. Alex is in the Science Club at school, while Lucy is in Mock Trial. They both tease each other relentlessly for being in the school’s “nerd” club, but they quickly band together in defense when Maggie tells them that it sounds like they’re both giant nerds.
5. Kara is obsessed with Superman, following his escapades in the news and doodling his symbol on almost every piece of paper she comes into contact with. Although she seems to get offended when Maggie asks about it. (“It’s not his symbol; it’s a crest! It has more meaning than that!” But what that meaning is Kara never gets to say, as Alex cuts her off for some reason with a harsh clearing of her throat.)
6. Alex tells her that Kara gets picked on in school a lot – for being small for her age, for being smarter than everyone else, for not fitting into the categories that the other kids perceive as ‘normal’. There’s a rage in Alex’s eyes as she explains, and Maggie realizes why Alex is so protective over her sister.
7. Lucy and Alex are both really good at pool. (She, however, is pretty bad at it.)

She takes every tidbit of information she learns about her new friends and relishes them. It keeps her mind occupied, keeps her distracted from her living situation. And the more time she spends with Alex and Lucy, the more she wants to keep spending time with them.

…

March 3^rd

Maggie wakes slowly that morning, a dull pain radiating from her stomach. It makes her groan and curl up tighter in her sleeping bag, but the sensation that comes from the shifting of her legs causes an alarm bell to go off in her brain.

“Please, no. Not right now,” she pleads out loud, suddenly wide awake.

A hand between her legs confirms her fears; she got her period overnight. She sits up, instantly regretting it as gravity takes hold. She scrambles out of her sleeping bag and sits on top of the plastic lining to survey the damage.

There’s a noticeable stain on her jeans and a traitorous cramping in her stomach, both of which make her want to curl up and die, albeit for different reasons.

Tears spring to her eyes. This is my only pair of pants. What am I supposed to do now?

She hasn’t even thought of what she was going to do when she got her period, hasn’t planned for it at all. With everything that’s happened, it didn’t even cross her mind.

She checks her watch. It’s past nine, meaning she slept in pretty late, and there’s no way she can sneak off to the bathroom without people seeing her. Not like she has a plan for what to do even if she got there. Lots of carefully-folded toilet paper, she supposes, but that won’t help her with the stain.

She pulls her knees to her chest, unable to stop the tears from falling. She feels stupid for crying, but can’t help it.

A few minutes later, she’s startled out of her misery by a knock.

“Hey, Maggie? Is everything okay?”

Alex.

Maggie sniffs and wipes her eyes, giving no reply. On one hand, Alex showing up now is probably her saving grace, but on the other, she really doesn’t want Alex to see her crying.

Again, she thinks bitterly.

Of course, Alex gives her no choice, sticking her head in the cave after another beat of silence. “Maggie?”

Alex obviously just came from the water, and Maggie checks her watch again, noticing the break in routine. Not that Alex has to stick to a routine, she thinks quickly. “H-hey,” she says out loud. Tries to sound perky. “You stayed out later than usual today.”

Alex looks concerned anyway, but she smiles a little. “Yeah, Kara and my mom are gone for the weekend, so I have the place to myself. Figured I could get some more waves in this morning.”

Maggie crawls out of the cave and Alex backs up so she can come out the little entranceway. They sit next to each other in the sand, Maggie making sure that her legs stay squeezed together tightly.

“Where did they go?” she asks, trying to take her mind off of the cramps that were made worse by her moving.

“To visit Kara’s cousin in Metropolis.”

“You didn’t go with?”

Alex flicks a piece of seaweed from her shoulder. “Nah. Figured I could do something with you. And besides.” Her face darkens somewhat. “I’ve been there enough.”

“So her cousin is…”

“Her biological cousin. He’s all that’s left of her birth family.” Alex huffs, the crinkle Maggie’s beginning to associate with Alex being agitated appearing on her forehead.

“Is he a bad person or something?”

Alex laughs. “No, he’s the complete opposite. He’s like the nicest guy in existence. That’s what makes it so hard to hate him.”

Maggie feels like she’s stuck on a question loop, but keeping Alex talking gives her time to compose herself. “Why do you hate him?”

“I don’t. Not really. It’s just– it’s complicated. He’s the one who brought Kara to us after her pl– after her parents died. He just kind of dropped her off at our door and went back to his life as if nothing happened. Barely keeps in contact. It always has to be us or Kara reaching out, never the other way around. Even visiting, we always go there, even though it would be so easy for him to just–” Alex cuts herself off with a huff. “But Kara doesn’t see any of it like that. She absolutely adores him and I don’t have the heart to break it to her.”

There’s a beat of silence after Alex finishes her rant, but then she shakes her head. “Anyway, that’s not what I wanted to talk about. Are you okay? I saw you didn’t get your breakfast yet and then I heard you…”

Maggie sighs, knowing there was no use denying that she had been crying. “I got my period,” she tells Alex. “I’m a complete idiot who didn’t prepare for it at all, and now my only pair of pants are stained, my stomach hurts so bad, I’m just…so frustrated.”

“Ohh,” Alex groans in sympathy. “Why don’t you come inside with me? You could get cleaned up and we could wash your clothes. Maybe invite Lucy over to hang out?”

Maggie glances back at the Danvers’ home, the offer very tempting, but fear filling her nonetheless. “You’re sure no one’s home?”

Alex crosses her heart with her thumb. “I promise. They won’t be back until tomorrow night.”

Maggie lets out a breath and nods, suddenly determined. She trusts Alex. “Okay.”

Alex beams, and the decision is worth it just for that.

Maggie accepts the hand Alex holds out for her and lets Alex pull them up to their feet. Alex leaves her surfboard on the beach and grabs the untouched breakfast bag instead, keeping her hand locked with Maggie’s until they reach the back door of the house.

They enter into a little mudroom, and Maggie kicks off her sneakers next to the other shoes piled up by a step. She grimaces down at her dirty socks as she does so. Despite her best efforts at cleaning, they still seem to soak up filth by the second. Alex must catch her look because she quietly tells Maggie not to worry about it before leading her further inside.

The mudroom leads to an almost spotless kitchen, where just a used cereal bowl and knife with crumbs scattered around it sit on the counter – no doubt from where Alex didn’t clean up from her breakfast. All the appliances in the kitchen appear brand new and expensive and Maggie can’t help but feel out of her depth at the sight of it all.

The feeling only grows as Alex guides her past what must be the living room to the staircase. Maggie sees a big screen TV and a giant couch, and she thinks about the tiny, grainy television she was allowed to watch cartoons on once a week if she finished all her homework and chores. The beat-up sofa that had been present in her household for as long as she can remember.

Maggie’s still looking around in awe as Alex pulls her upstairs. “I forgot you’ve never been inside here,” Alex says with a nervous chuckle. “Want me to give you a tour after you change?”

With a twist in her gut, Maggie remembers her current predicament, and how she feels like she has dirt coming out of her pores compared to the cleanliness of Alex’s house.

“Do you think I could take a shower?” she asks shyly, not wanting to overstep any boundaries.

“Of course!” Alex nods reassuringly. “We’ll get some clothes from my room and then I’ll show you the bathroom.”

Alex’s room is a little messier than the rest of the house, which makes Maggie relax for whatever reason. There’s a big bookshelf in one corner, and books left out all around the room in various positions. Alex heads to the dresser and starts rustling through a drawer. She pulls out a pair of jeans and holds them up in front of Maggie’s legs.

“These look like they might fit. They’re one of my old pairs that I figured I could give to Kara eventually.”

Maggie takes them and inspects them too, noticing the light color of the denim. “They must be from before your emo phase,” she teases, referencing Alex’s tendency to wear mostly dark colors.

Alex sticks her tongue out, looking down at her wetsuit, which is, of course, black. “You’re just jealous that I can rock the all black look.”

Maggie snorts. “Sure.”

Alex digs around another drawer then, pulling out an orange t-shirt. “See?” she says playfully, throwing the t-shirt at Maggie’s head. “I own some color.”

Maggie shakes the shirt out in front of her, taking in the little sunrise design with the words HELLO SUNSHINE underneath. “This is cute.”

“Good, because it’s yours now.” Alex throws a plain gray sweatshirt her way too. Maggie recognizes it as the one she was wearing the night they met.

“You don’t have to give me your clothes,” Maggie protests weakly.

Alex shakes her head. “You need a spare outfit for stuff like this. Besides, we can work out a laundry routine this way too.”

Maggie relents and concedes the point, also accepting the sports bra Alex hands her. “Thank you. I have some spare socks and underwear, but that’s it really. I’ve been trying to keep as clean as I can, but I know I still probably stink.”

“You don’t smell that bad.” Alex bumps her shoulder and smiles at her, and Maggie’s stomach flutters. “But it’s not a problem, Maggie.”

The next stop is the bathroom, where Alex hands her a robe and waits outside as she changes out of her dirty clothes. When she’s finished, she hands the bundle of clothes over to Alex to be washed, including all her socks and her one other pair of underwear, keeping the final pair to change into after her shower. Embarrassment heats up her face, but Alex is quick to reassure her.

“My mom taught me the trick to get out the blood. Your clothes will be spotless when I’m done, don’t worry.”

Alex then looks in the cabinet under the sink and roots around. “I’ve got tampons and some pads, which do you prefer?”

“Pads,” Maggie answers quickly. Her back shudders. Tampons give her the willies.

Alex pulls out an almost empty box, frowning slightly at it. “I’ll have to tell my mom I need some more. But that’s enough to get you started.” She claps her hands together. “I’ll leave you alone now. Take as long as you want in the shower. Help yourself to the soap and shampoo. I’ll be downstairs when you’re done, okay?”

After Alex leaves, Maggie turns the shower on and strips out of the robe. When she first steps in the tub, she doesn’t plan on taking too long. But then the hot water hits her aching muscles and she changes her mind with a content sigh.

The public showers really are nice, especially for being open all the time and free, but they can’t hold a candle to this.

And using soap that isn’t just the cheap stuff from a wall dispenser is a bliss Maggie didn’t know she needed.

She loses track of time, just standing under the spray after she’s done scrubbing every inch of her body and hair. She only gets out once she notices the water start to get cold. Then she dresses in the clothes Alex gave her, feeling better than she has in weeks.

Her stomach still hurts and she’s still kind of achy, but the new clothes and feeling of being truly clean do wonders for her spirit.

Alex is changed out of her suit and flipping through channels on the TV when Maggie comes downstairs. She lights up when Maggie steps into the living room.

“Feeling better?”

“Much better.” Maggie sits on the couch next to Alex, copying her posture of slumping back against the cushions.

She hasn’t sat on something so soft in forever and it makes her feel even more relaxed. Whatever doubts she had had about coming into Alex’s house are completely gone now. She feels safer than she has in a long time.

She can feel Alex’s eyes on her and she looks down at herself, wondering if she put the shirt on backward on something. She has Alex’s sweatshirt tied around her waist, as she decided that the bruises on her arm have faded enough that doesn’t need to cover up all the time anymore.

There’s nothing obviously out of place that she can tell.

“What?” she asks Alex.

Alex seems to startle out of a daze. “Oh! Nothing! Just– You– The clothes look good.” She clears her throat, her face suddenly several shades darker than moments prior. “Do they fit okay?”

Maggie pretends to ignore Alex’s sputtering, knowing she’s in no position to be teasing somebody who had just handled her bloody underwear. “Yes, thank you. The jeans were a little long, but I just cuffed them.” She holds up one foot to show the result.  

“I’m glad. Your clothes are in the wash and I called Lucy to come hang out with us. I told her you slept over and asked her to stop at the store for some emergency pads on the way. We can watch movies and order pizza for lunch and just relax for the day. Is that all right?”

“Yeah. You really think of everything, don’t you?”

Alex blushes again. “I try.”

When Lucy arrives, she comes bearing a shopping bag filled with soda, chocolate bars, microwavable popcorn, and a box of the powdered donuts that always seem to be at the checkout of every grocery store. She throws a pack of pads at Maggie without even saying hello. “Heard someone was in need of a pick-me-up.”

“What’s with you two and throwing things? Can’t you just hand things over like normal people?” Maggie grumbles, the pack having hit her in the face.

Lucy laughs as she plops down on the couch next to Maggie. “Alex and I take after each other. It’s why we get along. I like the shirt, Sunshine.”

Maggie can’t stop herself from blushing at the nickname and really hopes it’s not as noticeable on her as it is on Alex’s fair skin.

Lucy turns to Alex with a pout, taking the box of donuts out of the bag. “How come I wasn’t invited to the sleepover? You want Maggie all to yourself, don’t you?”

Alex shoves at Lucy, taking the box out of her hands. “You were the one who said you couldn’t hang out last night because of your family dinner or whatever.”

“Right,” Lucy sighs. “Lois is visiting. I guess she wanted to give Kara and your mom some bonding time alone with Clark. I’m so glad you called and gave me an excuse to get out of that house. Now please say I can stay here forever. Or at least until she leaves.”

“She can’t be that bad,” Alex says.

“You’ve never seen her with my dad. They’re a lethal combination.”

Maggie feels like she missing too many dots to be able to make a connection. “Wait. What does your sister coming have to do with Kara’s cousin?”

Lucy takes the donut that Alex is about to bite into and takes a big bite of it instead. Alex glares daggers at her.

“Lois is dating Kara’s cousin, Clark,” Lucy explains, mouth full. “Small world, huh?”

Maggie’s stomach rumbles for the first time that day. She grabs a donut too, and another after she inhales the first. “Oh my God,” she says in delight, bringing a hand up to her mouth when powdered sugar sprays everywhere. “I haven’t had a donut in forever.”

“Strict parents?” Lucy asks.

Maggie’s spine goes ramrod straight and she almost chokes on her last bite.

She sees Alex sit up in worry on the other side of the couch, but her face reads cautious curiosity as well.

Maggie swallows hard.

“They don’t believe in junk food,” she says in a small voice.

It’s the truth, for what it’s worth.

Lucy clearly takes the hint that she doesn’t want to talk about it, letting Alex change the subject to what movie they should watch. Maggie offers to make the popcorn while they choose, needing a few moments alone. She heads to the kitchen with the box Lucy brought, Alex calling after her where the bowls are located in the cupboards.

She takes a deep breath as the first bag cooks in the microwave, the vice grip that formed on her heart as soon as she thought about her parents loosening slightly.

I don’t need them, she thinks hard. They don’t want me and I don’t need them and I don’t ever have to go back there.

The microwave beeps and Maggie realizes she’s clutching at her ribs again, her side aching like she had just been thrown into the edge of the kitchen counter all over again. She focuses on the current moment, on letting her grip ease and taking out the cooked popcorn and putting another bag in the microwave.

The bruising on her side has slowly started to fade the past few days, and the pain has lessened, but not completely. It still hurts if she breathes too deeply or lays down the wrong way.

She has the sudden urge to grab Streaky from her bag once she goes back out to the living room, wondering if Alex and Lucy will make fun of her if she does. Despite still not understanding exactly why Kara wanted her to have him, the stuffed animal really does make her feel better and keeps her company at night, when she can’t always get her thoughts to quiet down.

As pathetic as that sounds, Maggie rolls her eyes at herself, filling up two big bowls with the popcorn after the second bag is done.

She’s composed when she goes back out to the living room and is surprised to see that Alex and Lucy have actually agreed on a movie. Alex starts the DVD and they all lounge out on the spacious couch, stuffing their faces with popcorn and chocolate as they watch. Neither one of them comments when Maggie gets out Streaky and cuddles up with him, much to her relief.

True to her word, Alex orders pizza for lunch, and by the time it arrives – two large pizzas for the three of them, but Alex just smiles and tells her to eat as much as she wants when Maggie asks if that’s too much – her cramps have eased up and she’s laughed along with every silly line from the movies that Lucy can recite from memory and she feels so much better.   

It’s sometime in the afternoon, after she’s stuffed herself full for what feels like the first time in weeks, Maggie starts to feel her eyes close, lulled by the food in her belly and the safe environment she’s in.

She tries to fight it, but the next thing she knows she’s waking up to a different movie playing, a blanket overtop her, and her head on Lucy’s shoulder.

“Sorry,” she mumbles, her voice slurred with sleep. She tries to move, but Lucy stops her with a hand on her arm.

“I don’t mind,” Lucy whispers. “Alex is out too.” She motions down to her lap, where Alex is indeed asleep, using Lucy’s legs as a pillow.

“Stay,” Lucy tells her. “You can go back to sleep, Maggie. We’ll be here when you wake up.”

And she must be too tired and content to argue because she listens, curling up against Lucy again before falling back asleep, Streaky still clutched in her arms.

…

Chapter Text

March 7^th

Alex shows up later than normal on Wednesday morning. She’s dressed in her clothes for school and she explains to Maggie that she slept through her alarm that morning. She gives Maggie her usual breakfast bag and one for lunch as well, just a simple PB&J, as she didn’t have time to make anything more complicated, she says.

Maggie doesn’t care. Food is food, after all, and she’s too grateful to be picky, which she tries to get across to Alex. “Beggars can’t be choosers, right?”

Alex sits and eats her own breakfast with Maggie, and the two are so lost in their conversation that they don’t hear the footsteps coming down the path to the boardwalk until it’s too late.

“Hey, Alex, I thought I’d find you down here. I have a question from the homewor– Maggie?”

Maggie freezes like a deer caught in headlights, turning to see Lucy coming down the steps, her head tilted in confusion. Alex is frozen as well, her mouth slightly open.

“Uh…” Maggie says helpfully. “Hey, Lucy.”

“Hey,” Lucy greets her. “What are you doing here?”

Alex had told Maggie that Lucy asked if Maggie was going to start going to Midvale High the other day. Alex had said that Maggie was being homeschooled by her parents. Maggie hates lying to Lucy, as she actually really likes her. And now she can’t help but think it would be better if Lucy knew the truth. Or at least as much as the truth that Alex knows. It would certainly make it easier for Alex, as Maggie doesn’t want to be the cause of Alex lying to her best friend.

Alex is about to say something, but Maggie cuts her off. “Can you give Lucy and me a sec?”

Alex looks alarmed, with a mix of guilt and apologies thrown in. “Are you sure?” she whispers.

“I trust Lucy,” Maggie whispers back. Seeing the little pout Alex makes, she adds, “I trust you too, Danvers.”

“Ha!” Alex scoffs, her ears turning red. Maggie’s been noticing Alex blush more and more lately, ever since she spent the day in Alex’s house. “You getting soft on me now?”

“You wish.” Maggie sticks her tongue out and gives Alex a playful shove, prompting her to stand up.

“Okay,” Alex says loudly, brushing off her jeans. “I’ll get my backpack and make sure Kara’s ready. Meet you in the car, Lucy.”

Maggie’s hands start to shake as the two of them are left alone. She means what she said to Alex. She does trust Lucy. But it doesn’t make her less afraid of letting someone else know her secret.

“Um…” Off to a great start, Rodas.

“It’s okay,” Lucy says after Maggie can’t figure out where to begin. “I know there’s something you and Alex have been keeping to yourself, but you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

“I do, though. Want to. I don’t want Alex to keep stuff from her best friend because of me.”

Lucy nudges Maggie’s shoulder, in the same way Maggie had just done to Alex. “You’re our friend too, though. So it’s fine. I’m just glad you have Alex to talk to.”

A warm feeling spreads through Maggie’s chest when Lucy calls her friend.

She’s never had many friends. Just Eliza really, and look how that ended.

Although, maybe some part of it was worth it.  Maybe.

She wouldn’t have met Alex and Lucy and Kara otherwise.

“I ran away,” Maggie blurts before she can stop herself. “I didn’t just move here with my family and I’m not homeschooled. I met Alex at that party the day I came here and I’ve been living on the beach ever since.”

Lucy blinks. Sucks in a breath. Seems to put two and two together. “That’s why you get afraid when I ask about your parents.”

Maggie’s shaking gets a little worse and she clamps a hand down on her arm to try to prevent it from becoming noticeable. “I guess I’m really bad at lying,” she says with a laugh she doesn’t feel.

“You live on the beach?” Maggie nods. “Here?” Maggie nods again, pointing out Alex’s board sticking out the side of her cave.

Lucy’s brow crinkles in confusion, so Maggie pulls her over and crawls inside. Lucy crawls in after her.

“Maggie… this is…”

Lucy’s voice is full of pity, and Maggie bristles in defense of her make-shift home. “It’s not that bad. Alex gave me a sleeping bag, that’s really all I need.”

“And your plan is to just live here forever?”

Maggie cringes slightly, having nothing to retort that with.

Lucy reaches out, touching Maggie’s knee. “Look, if you need a place to stay, a real home, I can ask my dad and–”

Maggie pulls back. This is starting to sound just like when she had told Alex. “No. If you really want to help me, then you won’t tell anyone about this. Do you know what’ll happen to me if you do?”

Lucy shakes her head.

“The cops will get me, and they’ll take me away, and you’ll never see me again, even if I can escape a second time. And I don’t think I could go through it a second time. That’s why I made Alex swear not to tell anyone. And you have to too.”

 Lucy looks shocked, and like she has a million questions, but all she says is, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. Of course I want to help you.”

“I know you didn’t. And I’m only telling you this because I trust you. So please don’t give me a reason not to.”

“I won’t,” Lucy declares, reaching out to pull Maggie into a hug. “Thank you for telling me. I didn’t mean to make you upset.”

Maggie wraps her arm around Lucy’s back, sinking into the hug. They stay like that for a beat before the time hits her. “Don’t you have to go to school soon?” she asks.

“Oh geez,” Lucy pulls back with a frantic look at her watch. “Alex is going to kill me if I make us late. Ugh, and I still have to ask her about the physics problem.”

Lucy scrambles back out to the beach and Maggie follows, chuckling at her friend. Lucy’s halfway up the steps before she turns back to Maggie.

“Talk more later?” she asks.

 Maggie smiles. “Looking forward to it.”

…

March 9^th

They’re in the diner for dinner Friday night – Alex on one side of a booth and Lucy and Maggie sitting together on the other. Maggie’s having a great time. Lucy knowing the truth about her has made things so much easier. She’s able to truly relax now when they’re together, which makes her tremendously glad, as she wants nothing more than to keep spending time with Lucy. Alex also seems more relaxed, no longer worried about accidentally spilling Maggie’s secret.

They’ve just finished eating and paid the bill when the bell over the front door rings. Suddenly Alex groans, rolling her eyes.

“Incoming jerk alert,” she says, prompting Lucy and Maggie to turn to see what she’s talking about.

There’s a couple of guys walking in to sit at the counter, loudly yelling for the waitress to bring them some milkshakes. Maggie judges them to be about sixteen or seventeen, and just as rude as the boys she was used to dealing with from her old school, if their hassling of the staff is any indication.

The tallest of guys looks over and spots the three of them sitting in the back and starts heading their way.

Lucy curses under her breath.

“Who is that?” Maggie asks.

“Logan. My ex,” Lucy replies. “He broke up with me when I told him I’m bi.”

Maggie tilts her head in confusion. “You’re what?”

Lucy doesn’t seem to hear her though, as she’s looking at Alex, who’s glaring at the approaching teen and stiff with tension. Maggie sees Lucy kick Alex’s shin under the table.

“Be nice, Alex. Just let me talk to him.”

“I’ll be nice to him when hell freezes over,” Alex hisses, the anger in her tone making Maggie cringe a little. Alex looks mad in a way that Maggie’s never seen from her friend. She wants to ask what the deal is, but doesn’t get a chance to as Logan reaches their table.

“Hey Luce,” he says, putting both hands on the edge of their table and leaning towards Lucy. His smile is bright and slick in a way that makes Maggie internally wince. She also notices how he pointedly ignores Alex, who’s absolutely seething next to him.

“Logan,” Lucy nods, not impolitely, but not too warmly either. “What do you want?”

“Can’t just stop by to say hey?” His gaze falls on Maggie, who shrinks back at the attention. “Who’s your friend? Haven’t seen her around before.”

Maggie opens her mouth, but nothing comes out. She doesn’t like the way he’s looking at her.

“This is Maggie. She doesn’t go to our school,” Lucy answers for her.

“Well, hello Maggie,” Logan says with a wink. “You can come join me and the boys if you’re getting tired of hanging out with these two lesbos.”

Maggie’s heart skips a beat. Did I hear that right?

Alex fake gags, speaking up. “She’s so not interested, jerkwad.”

Lucy sucks in a breath as Logan turns to Alex. “How would you know, Danvers?” he says. “You turn her into a dyke too?”

Maggie definitely heard that right. Her hands start to shake on the table, understanding what he’s implying about Alex and Lucy.

And her.

The blood starts to pound in her ears, giving everything a strange buzz. She clenches her fists in her lap, his words echoing in her brain.

Dyke.

Dyke.

Dyke.

The tone he spoke with soaks into her skin like a poison.

Meanwhile, Alex is clenching her fists, visibly shaking. “I don’t care what your deal is with me,” she spits. “But you leave Lucy and Maggie out of this.”

Logan laughs. “Or what, Danvers? You’ll fight me? Go ahead; I see your retard little sister isn’t here to hold you back this time.”

Alex stands up and slams both hands down on the table, causing the empty dishes to clatter, the pepper shaker to fall over, and Maggie to almost jump out of her seat.

Alex’s eyes are pure fire. Maggie’s seen that look before, the hate-fueled rage that she associates with one specific person.

And then it’s like she’s in two separate places. Part of her is there, watching the scene in the diner, and another part of her is stuck in the kitchen, waiting for the blow that she knows will come.

“Don’t you dare call Kara that ever again,” Alex hisses in the present.

Maggie ducks her head, hearing different words in her mind. You had better tell me that this was all some kind of sick joke, Margarita.

Lucy stands as well, pushing Logan back, away from Alex. “Logan, leave. Now.”

Logan puts both his hands up, his face breaking out in a grin. “All right, ladies, chill out. We’ll have to have fun some other time.”

And just like that, he walks away, going back to his friends at the front of the restaurant.

Alex looks at Lucy, outraged. “What the heck, Lane? You can’t just let him go like that!”

“Alex,” Lucy says, trying to get her attention, but Alex is on a roll.

“He can’t just insult my friends and my sister like that and expect to get away with it! Did you see the look on his face? He–”

“Alex,” Lucy says louder, interrupting. “Alex, look at Maggie.”

And both their gazes turn to her, and she sees the anger drain completely from Alex’s face, although she doesn’t understand why.

Because that’s never happened before. She’s never seen the anger gone that quickly. Not without some kind of pain on her part, at least.

Lucy sits back in the booth next to her. “Hey Maggie, you okay?” she asks gently.

It’s only when she tries to answer that Maggie realizes her teeth are chattering, hard. She’s also trembling, sunk back far into the corner of the booth, trying to be as small as possible. Her ears are still ringing and when she tries to take a deep breath, the air feels like it gets caught in her throat.

She shakes her head.

Part of her is still numb, still looking at her Valentine card lying on the kitchen table, torn in two. Looking at anything but the eyes filled with pure rage in front of her.

She can’t breathe. Is she even still breathing? She doesn’t know.

“Let’s get her out of here,” she hears from far away. Then there are hands on her, but they’re not the rough, calloused ones she’s expecting. They’re soft and gentle, and she doesn’t know what’s happening anymore.

When she comes to again, she’s outside.

It takes her a second to recognize the little garden block that’s set behind the bank a few blocks away from the diner.

She’s on one of the benches, sandwiched between Alex and Lucy.

She’s sobbing, or maybe hyperventilating, or maybe a mix of both. Her breath is rattling in her chest and her face is wet with tears and snot.

“It’s okay, Maggie. Just keep breathing,” Lucy is saying. Or maybe it’s Alex.

Maggie reaches out blindly for the arm wrapped around her shoulders, bringing it to her chest and clutching it hard. She sees then that it’s Alex talking to her, and she tries to do what she says, taking a deep breath and letting it out when Alex does.

And again.

Lucy is holding her close, rubbing her back. Maggie leans more into the embrace, slumping with sudden exhaustion.

And again. And again.

When she’s back in control of her lungs, she tries to wipe her face off with her arm, grimacing at the wet streak it leaves behind. “Here,” Lucy says, pulling out some napkins and handing them over. “I grabbed some before we left.”

Alex scoots back to give her some room and Maggie cleans herself up as best she can. Her voice is hoarse with crying when she tries to speak. “Sorry.”

Alex shakes her head. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I should be the one apologizing, for scaring you.”

“You–” Maggie can’t deny that Alex’s anger had scared her. But it was Logan’s words that had set her off in the first place. “What’s his problem? Why was he saying those things about you guys?”

It’s Lucy who answers, as she shares a look with Alex over Maggie’s head. “I tried to tell him about me. We were dating, you know? You’re supposed to be able to be honest with your partner. So I told him I’m bi and he freaked out, started saying it was Alex’s fault somehow.”

“I don’t– I don’t know what that means.”

Lucy's eyes get wide and she kind of pulls away from Maggie. “Oh. I’m bisexual. For me, it means that I like boys and I like girls.”

Maggie looks at Lucy, then at Alex, then back at Lucy. “But that’s–” She’s starting to shake again. Folds herself up small on the bench. “That’s not– Is that allowed?”

And oh, she’s said too much, given away too much. Because Alex and Lucy both look at each other with the same sad expression, and seem to have a whole conversation with just their eyes.

“It’s not if you ask people like Logan,” Lucy says gently. “But in the end, I don’t care what other people think. I like who I like and I’m not going to let hate like that stop me.”

Alex looks away then, her hand falling down from where it’s been resting on Maggie’s knee. And Maggie’s just so confused, so confused. But her brain and body are too tired to try and sort things out now.

The other two seem to notice this. Alex checks her watch. “It’s getting late.”

“My dad wants me home before nine,” Lucy agrees. “I have to get going.”

Lucy stands then and looks at Maggie still curled up on the bench. “Are you going to be okay?”

Maggie nods.

“I’ll make sure she gets back safe,” Alex promises.

Lucy nods, and giving them both a final hug, heads to her car.

Alex gives her a hand standing up and reaches out to grab her shoulders when Maggie wobbles a little on her feet. She’s lightheaded from breathing so hard, and she’s grateful when Alex gives her an arm for support as they start walking back towards her house.

They stop at a bathroom after Maggie asks, and Alex waits outside as Maggie changes into some clean clothes and freshens up for the night.

“Thanks,” she tells Alex when she comes back out. “For helping me out.”

“Kara has panic attacks too sometimes. I just tried to do what helps her. It’s not a big deal. Just as long as you’re okay.”

Maggie hugs her, needing the contact more than anything right now. “I’m okay.”

…

Lucy finds her, later, after they get back and Alex goes to bed, with the promise of seeing Maggie in the morning for breakfast.

Maggie’s just getting ready for bed herself when she hears someone coming down the boardwalk. She quickly ducks inside the cave, in case it’s Alex’s mom or something, but she relaxes when she hears Lucy call for her.

“Hey Sunshine,” Lucy greets as she crawls back out, using the nickname she’d called Maggie after Alex had given her that shirt. The shirt she had changed into earlier, in fact.

“Hey. What are you doing here?”

Lucy sits down on the bottom step, so Maggie joins her. “I snuck out. Wanted to make sure you were okay. With… everything earlier.”

Maggie hugs her arms across her chest. “I’m okay,” she says in a small voice. “I’m sorry if I freaked you guys out.”

Lucy frowns. “No, it wasn’t your fault. I’m the one who’s sorry.”

“Why?”

A shrug. “I should have stopped Logan before he came over to bother you guys. I know how mad he makes Alex and I should have known he’d say something stupid like he did. But I guess I was just hoping he wouldn’t be such a jerk today.”

Lucy sighs, kicking at the sand.

“He didn’t use to be, you know. I wouldn’t have dated him if he had been. He used to be really sweet. Then he started hanging out with those guys he was with today. Started partying on the weekends, and drinking. Before I knew it, he was like a completely different person.”

Lucy leans over and rests her head on Maggie’s shoulder while she’s talking. Maggie tenses, and kind of feels like she can’t breathe for the millionth time that night. Not because she’s uncomfortable, but rather, she realizes that she doesn’t want Lucy to move.

She wants her to stay like that, or to wrap her arms around Lucy and hold her, comfort her.

It scares her. And she’s had enough scares today already.

“Why does Alex hate him so much? I’ve never seen her get angry like that.”

Lucy huffs. “He made fun of Kara a lot when she first got here. Said some pretty nasty things to me when we broke up. Alex already hated him because of all that, but then he told everyone in school that he broke up with me because he caught me cheating on him with Alex.” Lucy’s voice catches a little. “Alex was already struggling with things and then just… to have the whole school spreading all these rumors about you, saying all these horrible things… She took it really hard. She’s hated his guts ever since. Not that I can blame her.”

Maggie’s quiet as she takes that all in, as ghosts of her father’s words dance in her head.

Lucy’s quiet too, and Maggie wonders if she’s thinking of similar ghosts. If they haunt Alex too.

“It’s hard, you know?” Lucy continues. “Being something that everyone else sees as different.”

The ghosts get louder.

“Yeah,” is all Maggie says.

…

Chapter Text

March 17^th

Maggie doesn’t realize how dependent she’s become on Alex bringing her breakfast – and lunch most days now – until Alex is suddenly gone.

Maggie hasn’t seen her all week.

She hasn’t seen Lucy either, for that matter. Or Kara.

She has no idea what happened. At first, she starts to think that maybe Alex is sick and staying home. But after four days of complete absence, Maggie doubts that’s it. She knows Alex would get word to her somehow if that were the case.

So then, she starts worrying that she did something to make Alex upset. They had hung out again with Kara and Lucy on Saturday, no one really mentioning what had happened the night before at the diner other than the two of them asking if Maggie felt better that day. But even though Alex was trying to act normal, she still seemed off somehow to Maggie, like she had a lot on her mind. And now she’s wondering if it was because of her.

But Alex hadn’t said anything and she had seemed fine the last time Maggie saw her, on Monday when she had brought Maggie breakfast like normal before she left for school.

But then she hadn’t shown up the next morning. Or the next.

So Maggie doesn’t know. And she tries not to think about it too hard because if she does, the loneliness starts creeping back in. Even though she’s been on her own for weeks now, it hasn’t really felt that way, not when she’s had a combination of Alex and Lucy and Kara to break up the dull moments.

And that makes her kick herself mentally, because she had promised herself after Eliza that she wasn’t going to get too attached to anyone ever again, but here she is, almost completely dependent on people she met practically the second after getting here. But she knows it’s too late now.

But there’s a more pressing problem than even the possibility of suddenly losing her only friends, and it’s one that’s a lot simpler.

She’s absolutely starving.

Like it or not, Alex is her consistent source of food, and without her, Maggie flounders.

She had a little bit of money left over from the last time Alex gave her some, but she had stupidly spent it all to buy dinner Monday night, before she realized that something was wrong. And so when she did realize and needed to come up with a game plan, she had absolutely nothing to work with. Not even some leftovers.

Not exactly a great start.

So she figures she really didn’t have much of a choice. She starts going through the garbage cans on the boardwalk late at night. But when she realizes that the payoff for that is too low and the risk of being caught too high, she switches to dumpster-diving in the back alleys downtown.

After the first couple times, she doesn’t really feel shame in it anymore, not like her first week on the streets. Most of her attempts end with some half-eaten pizza slices or cups of half-finished fries, but she realizes that right after the restaurants close and the workers have dumped the trash for the night that she never knows exactly what she might find. Sometimes she’s able to piece together a full meal.

Her companions most trips are usually the rats and stray cats, but twice she runs into a couple of homeless people doing the same thing she is. The first time, it’s a woman missing most of her teeth who just grunts when she sees Maggie and hands her a fully wrapped, intact burger that’s still kind of warm. The second time, though, it’s a guy covered from head to toe in filth, and he immediately starts screaming about Maggie trying to steal ‘his dumpster.’ Maggie’s quick to book it as soon as that happens, and she’s really glad she did after she sees two police cars prowling around the area.

She makes a mental note to avoid that place, but after that, she’s too afraid to try again, and she goes a full day with nothing but water, her stomach achingly empty.

She prays each night that she’ll wake to a brown bag with Alex’s familiar writing or see her out on the water. Twice, she considers ringing the doorbell on Alex’s front door and asking to see her. But she’s still scared of Alex’s mom discovering her, and the lingering fear that Alex is purposely ignoring keeps her from doing so. And although she’s learned a lot about the layout of Midvale since she arrived, she still isn’t quite sure where Lucy lives. So she’s stuck until she sees one of them again.

She studies herself in the bathroom mirror Thursday morning. She hasn’t really looked at herself too hard since she got there, her new haircut and the bruises on her skin making her avoid her reflection, the reminder of what happened too painful. But the bruises are gone now, and Maggie’s captivated with the fact that she no longer resembles the picture she has of herself in her head.

Her skin is darker now, a product of spending so much time outdoors, and she definitely looks skinnier than before she had left Blue Springs. She finds she doesn’t really mind her shorter hair anymore, although the ends are kind of choppy and a little uneven, but altogether it doesn’t look too bad. She’d eventually like to grow it out again, maybe not as long as she used to have it, but close to the length of Alex’s, coming in just below her shoulders.

And there she goes again, thinking about Alex.

She doesn’t really know why, but she doesn’t think she’ll ever be able to stop thinking about Alex.

By Saturday, she can’t take it anymore. She wakes hours before dawn because of the ache in her stomach. Unable to fall back asleep, she spends the time until the sun rises watching the ocean, desperately hoping more with every passing moment that Alex will show up that morning.

But when the sun’s fully in the sky and there’s still no sign of Alex coming, Maggie lets her hopes die.

She stands and makes her way to the boardwalk to start the day, her body achy and stiff. She starts walking downtown, past all the shops opening up for the day. She thinks about maybe trying to swipe some food from the farmer’s market she knows takes place every Saturday morning near the other end of the boardwalk. The fruit stands there are making her mouth water just thinking about them.

But she doesn’t really trust her thieving skills, and the last time she had been there, she had seen at least two police units patrolling the large crowd the event always gathered.

Plus there’s the whole stealing-is-wrong thing, Maggie thinks. Her dad had drilled that into her for as long as she can remember. But she’s past the point of really caring about that if she’s being honest.

She’s so deep in the argument with herself that she almost misses it, and nearly trips herself up as her brain registers what she’s just seen a second after her eyes do. The grin that breaks out on her face as she looks at the item on the ground is the first genuine smile she’s made in days.

A quarter, face up and shiny in the morning sun, just lying there in the middle of the sidewalk. Calling to her.

Maggie scrambles to pick it up, feeling like she just won the lottery. Because maybe it wouldn’t seem like much to most people, but Maggie knows exactly what it will get her.

Breakfast.

Or, more specifically, one of those oversized muffins from the best local bakery in town.

Maggie heads there with a spring in her step, knowing it’s still early enough that the pastry selection will be largely untouched.

Her hunch is proved correct when she gets to the bakery and the woman behind the counter happily informs her that she’s the first customer of the day. Maggie waits and watches as she finishes setting up a large display of cinnamon rolls before setting it on top of the counter.

Maggie orders a chocolate chip muffin, practically drooling as she takes in all the delicious pastries in front of her. She desperately wants to gobble up half the bakery, particularly the cinnamon buns sitting right in front of her, almost mocking. But she knows she’s lucky to at least be getting something to eat.

She hands her quarter over and the woman bags her muffin just as a timer goes off in the back room. “Here you go, dear. Have a nice day,” the woman says, handing the bag over to Maggie before going through the back doors. The timer shuts off a few seconds later.

And Maggie can’t help herself. There’s no one else in the store, so she seizes her chance. She swipes two of the cinnamon rolls from the front of the circular display, knowing they’re the least likely to be missed, and stuffs them in the bag with her muffin before quickly moving out the door.   

Something in her brain tells her she should feel bad for stealing from such a nice shop owner, but it’s quickly squashed by the growling in her stomach.

That is, until Maggie realizes that someone’s seen her.

There’s a dog grooming place across from the bakery, one Maggie’s never really paid much attention to before. But now, she can’t help but notice it. Or rather, the eyes she feels on her.

There’s a woman standing on the inside of the glass doors, holding a rag in her hand and a spray bottle in the other. She’s staring directly at Maggie, and even from across the street, Maggie feels the penetrating stare, and somehow, she just knows the woman saw everything.

Maggie clenches the bag hard in her first, but the woman makes no move to confront her. Instead, she simply flips over the open sign on the door and goes back to cleaning the window, with one last look at Maggie.

There’s something about the look that makes Maggie think the woman’s seen into her soul. Shame floods her, but she takes off before the woman decides to change her mind.

She would like to say that she doesn’t enjoy the cinnamon rolls after that, but they still taste like heaven, and Maggie scarfs down every last crumb.

…

She’s walking on the boardwalk sometime later when someone barrels into her from out of nowhere, tackling her into a hug.

“Maggie! Oh my God, I’m so glad I found you!”

Maggie pulls back with some difficulty to see Lucy with a frantic look in her eyes. She seems reluctant to let go as she starts rambling rapid-fire.

“I didn’t know that Alex was bringing you food every day! But she literally just got back phone privileges this morning and she called me worried sick about you, so I went to look for you at the beach earlier, but you weren’t there and then I got worried, because if I had known, I would have been bringing you food all week but I–”

“Whoa, Lucy, hang on, slow down,” Maggie interjects, her head spinning with trying to keep up. “What happened to Alex? Is she okay?”

Lucy takes a deep breath, giving Maggie one more tight squeeze before taking a step back. “Right, sorry. You don’t know. Alex got into a fight at school on Monday. She got a week’s worth of in-school suspension, and her mom grounded her. She has to take the bus to school and wasn’t allowed to use the phone or anything.”

Maggie’s heart skips a beat at the news and now she feels like the frantic one. “She got into a fight? With who? Did she get hurt?”

Lucy grimaces. “It– it was Logan. They have gym class together. From what I’ve heard, he started it, but the gym teacher had to pull Alex off of him, so she got in the most trouble. I heard she got a black eye, but I haven’t seen her. Logan’s nose is broken. He’s been a baby about it the entire week. He only got written up.”

Maggie’s eyes widen in shock, but she can’t think of anything to say beyond, “Oh geez.”

“Yeah.” Lucy kicks at the wood with her flip flop, blowing out a frustrated breath. “I should have known he wasn’t going to leave her alone after Friday.”

Lucy’s face is hidden by her hair, but Maggie can hear the guilt in her voice. “Hey, it’s not your fault. I don’t want to like, insult your ex or anything, but he seems like a total douchebag.”

That makes Lucy laugh a little. “He totally is, isn’t he? God.” She’s quiet for a beat, but then claps her hands suddenly, startling a seagull that had landed nearby. “Anyway, that’s only one of many reasons I wanted to find you. Wanna get food? ‘Cause I’m buying.”

Maggie’s stomach growls just at the mention of food. She wraps an arm around her abdomen like that’s going to keep it quiet and smiles sheepishly at Lucy. “Please?”

Lucy grabs her arm, pulling her in the direction of the nearest pizza shop. “C’mon. I’ll show you the other things I got for you after we eat.”

…

Lucy orders a whole pizza and a basket of fries, and then proceeds to eat only a slice and a handful, leaving the rest for Maggie. And Maggie wants to say that she doesn’t wolf the entire meal in less than ten minutes, but then she’d be lying. She doesn’t even wait for the pizza to cool, just lets the roof of her mouth burn as she inhales slice after slice. Then she attacks the fries, and they’re greasy and salty and utterly delicious, and one of the best things Maggie’s ever tasted, although that just may be the hunger talking.

When she’s done, Maggie feels full for the first time in days and she smiles contently at Lucy. “That was so much better than garbage pizza.” Seeing Lucy’s look of confusion, she adds, “You really don’t want to know.”

Lucy’s face scrunches in disgust. “Noted. But wait ‘til you see what else I brought you,” she says, pulling at her surprisingly stuffed backpack. She digs out some clothes and drops them in Maggie’s lap before zipping the backpack shut again, not letting Maggie see what else is in there.

Maggie holds up the pair of jeans, gauging them to be about her size. The t-shirt is a dark gray with ARMY scrawled across the chest.

“Figured if Alex gets to give you one of her shirts; I get to give you one of mine. But I’m still gonna call you Sunshine no matter what you’re wearing.”

Maggie laughs. She gets a little fluttery feeling in her chest whenever Lucy uses the nickname for her. “Well thank you.”

Lucy shakes her head, getting off the stool by the counter they’re sitting at and holding out a hand for Maggie. “Wait until you see the big surprise. This was just the beginning.”

Lucy leads her back to the cave, where she crawls inside, telling Maggie to wait on the beach.

But Maggie can’t help but start to panic when Lucy pulls her sleeping bag and all her stuff outside. “Wait, Lucy, what are you– ”

“It’s okay. Just give me a few minutes; I promise I’m not going to mess anything up. Don’t look or you’ll ruin the surprise.”

Maggie reluctantly turns around and watches the waves crashing on the shore, still feeling nervous. She knows it’s ridiculous, but she’s gotten attached to her little make-shift home and the collection of barebone items she’s obtained and the thought of anyone messing with them makes her want to cry, even if she trusts Lucy.

There’s a lot of scrambling and what sounds to be Lucy struggling with something and muttering to herself for the following ten minutes, telling Maggie not to look every time she asks if she needs help. Eventually, Lucy comes back out and plops onto her back next to Maggie, wiping sweat off her forehead.

“Okay, I’ll let you set your stuff up how you like, but it’s all ready for you now.”

“What is?”

Lucy nudges her with an elbow. “Go look.”

Maggie looks doubtful, but she does as Lucy says and goes into her cave. But instead of the normal space she’s used to seeing, she’s met with tan fabric, a zipper running down the middle.

“What the–”

Lucy pushes past her, impatient, and pulls the zipper the down, and then Maggie’s looking at the inside of a one-person tent, with her sleeping bag and a new little camping pillow set up inside.

“Ta-da,” Lucy says, sounding proud.

Maggie goes inside, looking at it in awe. “Lucy… This is… How did you…?”

Lucy follows her in, still grinning, but her voice soft in the way she has when she’s trying to reassure Maggie. “It’s one of my dad’s old tents. He’s got like five and he doesn’t use any of them. He’ll never notice one’s gone. And I just checked; you can’t see it from outside.”

Maggie feels like she could cry, and she hugs Lucy tightly. “Thank you. This is like the best thing ever. You’re like the best thing ever.”

And maybe she’s getting emotional, but she swears she sees Lucy’s ears turn red in the same way Alex’s do sometimes, but Lucy untucks her hair from behind them before she can get a good look.

“It’s nothing,” Lucy says. “Seriously. Sorry I didn’t think about it sooner. And if it kind of stinks. It tried to pick the best-smelling one.”

Maggie inhales deeply, getting a hint of must. “Nah, it’s perfect. Smells like perfection.”

That makes Lucy laugh, and she leans back on her hands. “Well, I don’t know when Alex will be ungrounded, but we could meet up again tomorrow to get food. And I could bring you some stuff before school this week if Alex can’t. Or even if she can, I’ll bring extra.”

“That would be great. I’m just glad to know what happened. I was a little afraid she was avoiding me or something.”

Lucy’s head tilts. “Why?”

Maggie shrugs. “She was kind of quiet last Saturday. And then, you know, I didn’t see her all week, and I started thinking maybe she was mad at me.”

“That definitely wasn’t it. You didn’t do anything,” Lucy says, shaking her head. “I don’t want to speak for her, but I know she’s not mad at you, Maggie.”

Maggie’s glad to hear that. She feels a little weight lifting off her shoulders, now that she knows the truth.

Lucy hugs her again. “So, I need to get going, but I’ll see you tomorrow, Sunshine.”

Yep, the fluttery feeling is back. “See you then.”

…

March 18^th

It’s the cats that get Maggie’s attention.

She’s making her way back to the beach around dusk when she sees them, five or six street cats all running down the same alley. This isn’t the first time Maggie’s seen strays hanging around, but she’s never seen that many around each other without there being a fight, so she follows, curious.

There’s even more when she gets behind the building. Maggie counts at least twenty, but it’s hard to be sure when they’re all moving around. But it seems they’re moving with a purpose, as they all gather in front of a specific door. They start meowing all at once, and some of the closest ones start clawing at the metal.

Maggie’s so engrossed in watching them and wondering what they’re doing that she almost misses the door swing open from the inside. She barely has time to duck behind the nearby dumpster. She really doesn’t want to have to explain to somebody what she’s doing back there.

“Okay, okay, I’m here, settle down,” a voice says. Maggie’s heart pounds until she realizes the words aren’t for her. She peeks around the edge to take a look.

She recognizes the woman she sees. It’s the woman from the dog groomers’, the one who had seen her steal from the bakery. Now Maggie is even more intent on hiding, really not wanting the woman to see her and remember.

It makes sense that she’s behind the dog groomers’ when she thinks about it, especially if the foul smell coming from the dumpster is any indication.

Meanwhile, the cats have all gone still as soon as the woman speaks, sitting up and staring at her, tails flicking. The woman starts placing the dishes she’s carrying in front of them, and Maggie sees they’re full of food. The cats don’t move even when all the dishes are down, and Maggie watches in awe.

“Enjoy,” the woman says, and all the cats nearly pounce on the bowls after being given permission. While they’re eating, the woman goes back through the door and comes back out with two larger bowls, filled with water.

Some of the cats leave as soon as they’ve had their fill. Some of the others move a little ways away and start grooming themselves. The rest gather around the woman, twirling around her ankles and rubbing up against her legs. She pays special attention to these ones, stooping down to pet them.

“I’m all out of catnip,” she tells them. “I should be getting more soon, along with the flea repellant.”

Her voice is kind and it’s obvious she cares about these strays, who most of the other people in Midvale consider a nuisance.

Out of nowhere, the woman looks toward the dumpster and Maggie ducks back around, holding her breath.

“It seems you guys aren’t the only ones here who are hungry tonight.” And Maggie kicks herself because she must have been spotted, but then the woman adds, “Time for me to get my own dinner. I’ll see you all tomorrow.”

And then there’s the sound of metal bowls being stacked and a door closing, and the cats start dispersing in different directions. Two of them come over to where Maggie’s still crouched, butting their heads against her knees.

“Hi,” she whispers, holding out a hand for them to sniff. One of them – a calico with a notched ear – bats at her fingers playfully. She pets them both, until she notices that it’s really starting to get dark now. “I better go,” she tells them, standing up after double-checking that the coast is clear.

The calico follows her, meowing.

“Maybe I can come visit you again tomorrow,” Maggie says. “Seems like this is a pretty regular thing for you guys. I just can’t let anyone see me, okay?”

The cat gives her a final meow and then scampers off, and Maggie heads home for the night.

…

She’s incredibly glad for the tent that night. Because not too long after she falls asleep, she’s woken up by a huge crack of thunder. And shortly after that, there’s another, and another, and then the sky opens up to a torrential downpour.

She’s lucky. It’s the first real rain she’s had since coming to Midvale. There had only been a few short drizzles before this.

But now, she’s nice and dry in her tent, and the thunderstorm doesn’t last very long. The rain continues throughout the night, but she’s lulled to sleep by the sound of it hitting the boards above her.

When she wakes up the next morning, the sand around her tent is soaked, but the combination of the bottom tarp layer and the tent had kept her space completely dry.

“I owe Lucy,” she says out loud. “Big time.”

When she changes into clean clothes that morning, she can’t help but smile as she puts on the shirt Lucy had given her. And that makes her amend her thought from a few days ago.

She doesn’t think she’ll ever be able to stop thinking about Lucy either.

…

Chapter Text

March 25^th         

Alex is officially un-grounded one week later. Her mom lets her go out for dinner on Sunday, giving her a chance to spend time with her friends before school starts again for the week. Which Maggie is extremely grateful for, because it feels like forever since she’s seen Alex.

Lucy’s the one to tell Maggie, so they go together, meeting Alex at a burger joint downtown. They’re there first, but Alex walks in a few minutes later. As soon as she sees her, Alex pulls Maggie into a tight hug.

“Maggie! I missed you so much.”

Lucy gives a playful pout. “What am I? Chopped liver?”

Alex rolls her eyes. Maggie takes the chance to inspect her face closely, but there are no longer any signs of bruising, which Maggie’s glad for.

“I’ve seen you in school all week, genius,” Alex is saying.

Lucy beams at Maggie. “Did you hear that? She called me smart.”

Maggie can’t help but laugh as Alex playfully punches Lucy’s shoulder. She’s missed this.

“Remind me never to get grounded ever again,” Alex groans after they sit down and order. “My mom wouldn’t let me do anything. I was so bored.”

“Was she mad at you?” Maggie asks.

Alex shrugs. “Not really. She just grounded me to make it a point to, and I quote, ‘use your words next time, Alexandra.’” Another eyeroll. “Kara’s been grumpy all week though. She had to ride the bus and she hasn’t had to do that since Lucy started driving us and it messed up her whole routine. So I feel bad about that.” She turns to Maggie. “And that I couldn’t be there for you.”

Maggie shakes her head. “I was fine. And Lucy is awesome.” Alex lights up when she hears about the tent. Lucy, however, suddenly becomes bashful with the praise.

“It was nothing,” she mumbles.

Their food comes, and although they’re all done eating in less than twenty minutes, they spend the next hour or so just catching up. Lucy tells them all the stories she’s heard of how Logan had decked Alex in the face during a basketball game, only to have Alex tear into him, leaving him a bloody mess on the court in the gym. Alex claims that it wasn’t as dramatic as the rumors made it seem, but she doesn’t deny much about them either.

(Maggie has to bite her tongue when Alex insists that it hadn’t even hurt when Logan punched her, not wanting to explain how much experience with black eyes she has that she knows exactly how much they hurt.)

But she can tell that Alex doesn’t really want to talk any more about it, so she changes the subject, telling them that about the calico cat she’s made friends with. She’d gone back to the groomers a couple of times last week to visit, although she doesn’t mention that part, or anything about the lady who feeds them. (Something about her intrigues Maggie, the way she takes time out of her day to care for the strays nobody else wants to deal with, the way the cats all listen to her and pause their normal squabbles once a day during feeding time. And most of the cats are sweethearts, waiting to find Maggie after the woman goes inside for the night and then begging for extra attention. And Maggie’s happy to oblige, as she feels a little like a stray herself.)

Eventually, the three of them wander back outside, but none of them really want to part yet for the night, so they head to the pier. It’s late, much later than Alex and Lucy usually stay out on a school night, but they sit on the edge and lean up against the railings, letting their legs dangle above the water. The sky darkens around them and the night grows cooler, and they take the chance to just be together.

…

March 26^th

Maggie wakes up later than usual, due to the fact that she had trouble falling asleep last night. Alex has already come and gone, but there’s a note waiting for her.

Forgot to ask you last night: meet me and Lucy behind the shed at the football field at 11? They started outdoor lunch for us. And don’t worry, no one will know you don’t go to our school. –A

She knows the place Alex is talking about, the field shared between the high school and middle school behind the parking lot. She gets there at 11:10, not wanting anyone to see her wandering around outside the school before lunch actually starts.

Alex and Lucy are already there, sitting in the grass, and they’re all smiles when they see Maggie coming. There are a couple kids sitting in the bleachers and on the actual field, but the shed is far out, and nobody can see them from that angle.

“You made it,” Lucy greets her, patting the spot next to her for Maggie to sit.

“Here.” Alex hands her a brown bag. “I got you lunch. Hope you don’t mind cafeteria food.”

Maggie shakes her head, taking it with a grateful thanks. She unwraps what looks to be a veggie sub, much more appetizing than anything she’s ever seen come out of a school cafeteria. She bites into it with relish. “So you guys are just allowed to go outside for lunch?”

“Yeah,” Lucy says, taking a bite of her own sandwich. “It used to be just seniors that were allowed to, but now they’ve opened it up for underclassmen as well, as long as we stay on school grounds.”

“Huh.” There had certainly never been anything like that at Blue Springs High, where teachers had monitored students like hawks in the cafeteria. But of course, the weather there wasn’t exactly conducive to outdoor eating most of the year anyway.

“They switched my gym class,” Alex informs her with a smile. “Now I’m in the same one as Lucy. And the volleyball unit is coming up soon. We’re going to crush all the guys.”

Lucy high-fives her. “And we’ll get in some practice before the summer. There’s a league we’re gonna do this year,” she explains for Maggie.

“Do you like volleyball?” Alex asks.

Maggie shrugs. “I don’t know. I’ve never really played.”

“We could teach you! Kara wants to learn how to play too.”

“Okay.”

“Oh yeah!” Lucy exclaims out of nowhere, grabbing her backpack. She shoots them both a sheepish look and shrugs. “This has nothing to do with anything, but I just remembered. I got you a book to read. I know Alex has been giving you some, but you can’t trust her with library books because she never returns them.”

Alex looks offended. “Yes, I do!”

“Tell that to all your late fines,” Lucy teases, sticking her tongue out at Alex. She hands Maggie a plain hardcover. “It’s so good,” she gushes. “Alex, you’ll have to read it after Maggie’s done.”

Alex is still pouting. “You probably can’t even pick a good book, Lane.”

Lucy punches her shoulder lightly. “Fine then. Don’t listen to your best friends. Because Maggie will tell you how good it is when she’s done too.”

Maggie’s chest warms at the inclusion of her as one of Alex’s best friends. She tucks the book in her backpack and listens as Lucy and Alex continue to bicker playfully.

A few minutes later, a faint bell can just be heard coming from the school building. “Ugh,” Alex groans. “That’s the warning bell. We gotta go.”

Maggie waits a couple of minutes after everyone else has headed back inside, then she cuts across the field and away from the school, clutching the book and smiling the entire time.

…

Maggie goes to the back alley behind the dog groomers to pet the cats again that night. It’s probably more of a risk than she should be willing to take, but she makes sure she keeps out of sight while the Cat Lady – as Maggie has taken to calling her, even though she spends most of the time dealing with dogs – is there.

And it most definitely is silly, but it’s nice to be able to just sit and talk about whatever she wants, and know that the ones listening will never judge her, because well, they can’t understand her.

Because that’s what she does, once that cats start seeking her out after being fed. She sits and pets them and talks, telling them things she’s never dared say out loud, let alone to anyone else. Her friend the calico has taken to sitting on her lap and purring while the others circle around and butt heads for her attention, and Maggie whispers her secrets into their ears.

But something a little different happens today. Cat Lady is later than usual, and the cats seem like they’re about to riot by the time the back door finally opens.

“We’ve talked about this. If you guys don’t keep quiet, someone’s going to notice me doing this and try to put a stop to it,” Cat Lady says, putting out the food bowls like normal. The cats all settle down. “I’m sorry I’m late. Takeout took longer than I thought. Not that you guys understand that.”

She places a white paper bag on top of the lid of a trashcan, immediately shooing away the cat that tries to jump up to check it out. “This one isn’t for any of you, got that?”

The rest of the routine goes like normal, and after she’s spent a few minutes petting the ones that linger behind, the woman gathers up all the bowls and heads back inside.

Except she’s left the bag behind on the trashcan, and Maggie’s mouth starts to water. Even from that far away, she recognizes the logo of the burger place Lucy and Alex had just taken her to. The woman must have forgotten she left her own dinner behind.

And the usual gang of cats has found her now, but Maggie isn’t going to miss this perfect opportunity. She gives them all a quick pat on the head and then darts to the trashcan, snagging the bag before ducking down the nearest alleyway.

And she can smell that she’s right as soon as she gets near the bag, but a glance inside proves it. There’s a container of fries and what looks like two burgers all wrapped up, still warm, and even a little side of coleslaw.

Maggie nearly skips off with her treasure, getting out of there before the woman realizes she had left the food behind.

And well, if she feels a little bad about it, her growling stomach quickly squashes her guilt.

…

She has trouble falling asleep again that night. There’s something bothering her in the back on her mind, something keeping her awake, the same thing as the night before, but she doesn’t know what exactly.

Instead of tossing and turning and letting herself think about it, she pulls out the book Lucy had given her and a flashlight, propping herself up with her backpack and pillow, and starts reading.

Lucy’s right; the book is good. It’s a fantasy, about a woman knight in a made-up kingdom, filled with action and adventure. Maggie’s hooked by the third chapter, after the knight rescues the kingdom’s princess, who had been kidnapped by a rival kingdom.

She stays up reading much longer than she probably should. She keeps telling herself that she’ll stop reading as soon as she finishes the chapter she’s on, but then it ends and Maggie’s eyes are drawn to the next page, and she keeps going.

The knight is an awesome hero, and Maggie usually never likes the princesses in these kinds of stories, but this one proves to be just as strong and foolhardily stubborn as any of the princes that are normally the heroes in a medieval story.

About halfway through, after the knight and the princess have made their way back safely to the kingdom and the king himself has commended the knight for rescuing his daughter, the princess asks the knight to meet her in her chambers late at night. The two stay up all night talking, reminiscing of the time they had spent together on the road and all the adventures they had shared in their travels back to the kingdom. And when it comes time for the knight to leave in the morning, she lingers near the door, the princess seeming just as unwilling for her departure. They both laugh when the princess mentions how silly they are being, and then there’s a long pause as they just look at each other.

And then, suddenly, the knight’s asking for permission and the princess is saying yes and then they’re kissing.

The book falls out of Maggie’s hands in her surprise, hitting her in the face and causing the flashlight to fall from where it’s been nestled in the crook of her shoulder. The light sputters off with the impact, and Maggie lays there in the dark, her heart thumping in her chest.

Did I read that right?

She doesn’t open the book again to find out.

Instead, she tosses it on top of her backpack and pulls the sleeping bag up to her chin, intent on going to sleep this time.

She wills herself to forget what she had just read. To ignore the fluttery feeling in her stomach and the whisper, deep in her heart, telling her to be as brave as that knight.

…

March 28^th

She’s ignored the book for two days, but she can’t help herself. The itch to find out what happens in the rest of the story is just too strong, even if she’s certain she knows the ending.

Someone will catch the princess and the knight together, the princess will get in trouble, and the knight will probably be banished from ever returning to the kingdom.

But still, her curiosity wins in the end.

Maggie picks the book up like it might scald her suddenly sweat-covered palms and glances around to make sure she’s absolutely alone. She’s being ridiculous, but the fear that someone will see her and instantly know what she’s reading and call her out for her sins is heavy in her mind.

She starts reading again anyway.

It turns out that what Maggie had taken for the knight building a friendship with the princess, and all the time alone they had spent on their journey despite many other royal guards traveling with them, had actually been the knight courting the royal. And they don’t just kiss that one time, but over and over again, nearly every time they see each other after that. And the princess announces their relationship to her father, who makes a royal announcement to the entire kingdom, bestowing his well-wishes onto the new couple. And the pair continue to go on adventures together.

Maggie’s taken aback when she realizes that she’s reached the end of the book, when it ends happily.

No one had yelled at the knight or the princess when they heard about their relationship.

No one had told them that it was wrong.

No one had stopped them from kissing, or holding hands, or exchanging love letters (despite the many palace messengers that had delivered them.)

The king still loved his daughter; in fact, he had been overjoyed when he learned of them dating. He hadn’t gotten angry, hadn’t yelled. Instead, he had welcomed the knight to join the royal family dinners, giving her a seat at the table next to the princess.

It leaves Maggie with her thoughts spinning, everything she’s been told and taught and shown all her life about love warring with the warmth that’s taken root in her chest.

Lucy’s right. She likes the book. She really, really likes it.

She gives it back after school that day and she’s relieved when Lucy doesn’t ask her anything about it. Just, “Want me to get you the sequel? It’s just as good.”

“Okay,” Maggie says, trying not to let on how excited she is to know that there’s another book.

There’s a spark of something in Lucy’s eyes at the answer, and her smile is so bright that Maggie can’t help but smile too.

…

April 1^st

“Maggie, look! I found a hermit crab!” Kara shouts.

Maggie had found Kara playing on the beach near the pier by herself earlier, and Kara asked if Maggie could play too. Alex was busy with homework, she said, and she had gotten bored. And of course, Maggie wouldn’t turn Kara down, especially since it had been a little while since they had seen each other. The puppy dog eyes when Kara asked weren’t even necessary.

They had tried to build a sandcastle first, Kara insisting after Maggie said that she had never made one. But Kara’s energy was too pent up to sit still for long, so they’ve been playing tag for the past ten minutes, with Maggie once again making note of how fast Kara is.

She uses the distraction as a chance to catch her breath, leaning over to rest her hands on her knees as Kara runs back towards her. Maggie knows she’s not that out of shape, but there had been days where she hadn’t gotten nearly as winded during the entire track practice as she is right now.

Kara could probably beat half the team, she thinks. And she’s not even old enough to be on it.

She straightens up when Kara gets near, her hands clasped tightly together.

“Maggie, look!” she repeats.

Despite how much time she spends on the beach, Maggie’s only seen the hermit crabs that the stores on the boardwalk sell, so she’s interested to see what one looks like without a brightly painted shell. But when Kara pulls her hands apart, they’re empty, and she taps Maggie on the arm with a huge grin on her face.

“April Fools!” Kara says, throwing her hands up in the air. “You’re it!”

And it should be hilarious because Kara had really gotten her, but Maggie’s entire body tenses up with the words. Because that can’t be right, can it? But a quick glance at her watch and the little 4/1 at the top of the display confirm it.

I haven’t really been keeping track. It’s April now. Which means…

Her birthday was a few days ago.

Kara’s face falls when Maggie doesn’t laugh with her or try to tag her back. “Maggie? Did I do April Fools wrong?”

Maggie tries her best to give Kara a smile. She shakes her head. “No, that was a good one.”

Kara still seems uncertain, pushing her glasses further up her nose. “Alex said on April Fools you’re supposed to prank people. That it’s supposed to be funny. Was it not funny?”

“It was,” Maggie says sincerely. “I’m sorry. I just remembered something.”

“Something that made you sad?” Kara asks.

And Maggie finds herself choking up. Kara sees this and holds out her arms, in case Maggie wants a hug.

Maggie does, stepping closer to Kara, and hugging her back. She takes a few deep breaths. Tries desperately not to think about the fact that she’s fifteen now.

Tries not to think about the fact that her quinceañera was supposed to be yesterday, the Saturday after her birthday.             

Tries not to think about the party that had been planned, the list of relatives and family friends that had been invited.

Tries not to think about the dress hung up in the closet, her mother’s dress that she had worn for her own quinces.

(Maggie had hated it. Hated how the chest didn’t fit right when she tried it on because her mom had had much more going on in that department even at fifteen than Maggie probably ever will. Hated how the skirt had made her legs itch and long for the denim she preferred to wear all the time. Hated how stuffy it felt and just the fact that she was going to have to wear a dress in general.)

She fails.

And now, now she can’t help but think that she’d wear that dress no matter what, have that stupid party she hadn’t even wanted, if it meant that her parents still loved her. If it meant that she still had a family.

Her grip on Kara tightens.

She takes another deep breath, forcing herself to think about all the times she had hidden in her room just to avoid her parents’ yelling.

All the days she had dreaded going home from school, watching the clock tick in last period and silently begging for the second hand to move a little slower.

The way her teachers had always avoided looking at her whenever she showed up with fresh bruises in places she couldn’t hide. Because she was just a brown kid with a dad who was the sheriff, so surely, they shouldn’t try to get involved. (Even for the ones who had tried, nothing had ever come of it anyway.)

She thinks about the woman knight. About how she wants to be brave like her. She thinks about Alex, and Lucy, and how happy she feels whenever she’s around them.

She takes one last deep breath, and then she pulls back, giving Kara a genuine smile. This time, she hasn’t shed a single tear.

“Thanks, Kara. I needed that. Now c’mon, I’ll race you to the lifeguard stand.”

Kara’s face lights up again, and the tension from moments before evaporates. “Okay!”

(Kara beats her by a landslide.)

…

Chapter Text

April 12^th

Maggie does a good job, over the next few weeks, of pushing aside her feelings about turning fifteen (and all the memories of past birthdays – because her birthday had always been a good day; where maybe she never really got much in the way of presents, but she was always allowed to pick what they had for dinner, and her dad was always super nice to her, and her parents didn’t fight and she always had a break, just for one day, from the fear and the pain that was a usual constant in their household.)

But, in reality, it’s not that hard, because she has other things to worry about.

Like the fact that Lucy had given her the second book, and Maggie had devoured it immediately, the once-again happy ending and the smile on Lucy’s face when she gave it back over lunch at school and said she’d really liked it and the way Alex’s eyes had sparkled at a joke Maggie said later all leaving Maggie with butterflies in her stomach and a confusing jumble of thoughts in her head.

(Thoughts that maybe she hadn’t been wrong about what she felt before she slipped that stupid note in Eliza’s locker, before her whole world had collapsed in upon itself. Maybe she wasn’t wrong. Thoughts that maybe, despite all the evidence to the contrary, those feelings were okay.)

Or like the fact that Alex had goaded her into trying volleyball a couple of times, which had ended with some very sore arms on Maggie’s part, and a bloody nose after she got hit in the face with the ball for the second time.

(She’d given up after that – told Alex she didn’t think volleyball was her game.)

And then, there’s the fact that Cat Lady knows about her.

(That’s the thing worrying Maggie the most.)

Because there’s been a meal left out for Maggie every night now. The second time it happens, Maggie realizes it’s not a coincidence, not just Cat Lady forgetting about her own food. It’s deliberate, and Maggie could kid herself that the food is meant for someone else, but she’s never seen any other homeless people back that way, never seen anyone back that way actually, except for Cat Lady.

And of course, Maggie’s freaking out that an unknown adult – someone who could rat her out at any time to the police or child protective services – knows about her, but the absolute worst part is that it hasn’t stopped her from going back nearly every night.

The promise of food is just too tempting.

Because with Alex and/or Lucy feeding her breakfast and lunch most days, getting dinner from Cat Lady means three meals a day for Maggie – without having to pick through any trash. A definitive plus. And since it started, she’s hardly once felt that aching, desperate hunger, and the extra space she had noticed in her waistband had filled back out, much to her relief.

So she keeps going back.

She knows it’s risky. But Cat Lady never confronts her; just feeds and spends some time with the strays and then goes back inside, leaving behind a takeout bag that the cats know by now not to touch. Maggie is always careful to wait for a few minutes after the door closes, petting her cat friends and watching for movement in the apartment above the shop, but she never sees anything, and nobody ever comes back outside. She’s always quick to snag the food and get out of there, just in case.

She tells herself that if Cat Lady makes any kind of move, does anything else besides leaving out the food for her, that’ll be the end of it, and she’ll never go back.

But for now, she’s going to hope that there is such a thing as kindness from a stranger, and milk it for as long as she can.

…

April 14th

“See, Kara, you have to face sideways and then just flick your wrist like this,” Alex says, pantomiming the technique a few times as Kara squints in concentration. “And then–” Alex completes the motion, effortlessly tossing the frisbee over to where Maggie’s waiting to catch it.

Maggie lunges to the side and snags it from the air, throwing it back towards Kara. Her throw is a lot less skilled than Alex’s, the frisbee taking a wild turn two-thirds of the way there. She’s sure it’s about to zoom over Kara’s reach and into the waves, but then Kara’s arm comes up and she snatches it in the time it takes Maggie to blink.

“Okay,” Alex calls. “Just like that, Kara. It just takes some practice.”

Kara, despite being the one to suggest they play frisbee, does not seem like she’s having any fun. They’ve been playing for at least thirty minutes now, and she just seems to be getting more and more aggravated. She’s been quieter than usual all day, and during the picnic on the beach that they had earlier, Maggie noticed the way she kept pulling the collar of her t-shirt away from her neck and rubbing the skin there, like the fabric was bothering her. She gives it another tug now, then turns and throws the frisbee in Alex’s direction. Only the disc catches the wind and flips over in the air, landing somewhere halfway between Alex’s and Maggie’s designated retrieving territory.

Kara kicks at the sand in frustration, scattering a wide arc out in front of her. “I can’t do it!” she cries, her voice rising in pitch.

Maggie jogs over and grabs the frisbee, then brings it over to give Kara another chance. When she gets closer, she sees the tears brimming in Kara’s eyes, the way all the yanking on her shirt collar has stretched out the hem and distorted the shape.

“Hey, no, you did fine,” Maggie says, trying to reassure her. “Sometimes the wind can make it go all crazy. Try again, just wait for the wind to die down before you throw.”

Kara takes the frisbee again and inhales deeply as she does what Maggie says. A few seconds later, the wind stops and she sends the frisbee to Alex, with such force that it goes zipping over Alex’s head before she can even try to jump and catch it.

They all watch as the frisbee lands quite some distance away, close to where some sunbathers are lying on their towels, much further than even Alex, with the best arm between them, could ever hope to throw it.

Alex turns back towards them and clears her throat. “Um… that was good, Kara. Just, maybe uh, a little softer next time?”

But that seems to be the last straw for Kara. “It’s too hard!” she cries, her voice really rising now. Her foot stomps in the sand, and Maggie swears she feels the ground shake a little. “Everything is too hard! I can’t do anything right!”

Kara’s face is pinched and red and angry, the tears spilling over. Alex starts heading towards them as Maggie tries desperately to think of something to say to make Kara feel better.

“Hey,” she says softly, deciding against reaching out as she sees the red flush spread down Kara’s neck. “It’s okay–”

Kara shakes her head hard. “No!”

Three things happen at once. Kara’s eyes start glowing, a white-hot kind of glow, and she squeezes them shut, the light still penetrating from behind her eyelids. Maggie takes a step back and Alex kicks up into a sprint, her voice sharp with shock and kind of panicky.

“Kara!”

But Kara’s already dropping to the ground, curling up awkwardly with her elbows in the sand and her hands covering the back of her head. She starts screaming just as Alex reaches her, one long scream that’s muffled by the ground, but still brings heads swiveling their way.

Alex ignores the people looking at them and crouches down, waiting until Kara runs out of breath. She puts a hand on Kara’s back, her mouth opening to say something, but Kara jerks harshly and smacks Alex’s arm away, with a sharp “Don’t touch me!”

Maggie hears the slap and watches as Alex loses her balance, landing on her butt in the sand. She rubs at her arm, her own face flushing in anger. “Ow, Kara! What the heck!”

Kara doesn’t say anything else, just curls up into an even tighter ball, shaking with tension.

Alex huffs angrily and dusts her shorts off, looking at Maggie. “I’m gonna get the frisbee,” she says, marching away with her arms crossed.

Maggie, not really knowing what else to do, sits down close to Kara and waits. She can tell Alex needs some time to blow off steam.

There are about a hundred questions swirling around in her head, but altogether, Maggie realizes she’s not as surprised as she maybe should be. Every little odd detail she’s ever noticed about Kara comes together in sharp focus, clicking in a way that finally makes sense. But she knows now is not the time to mention it.

Alex comes back a few minutes later, frisbee in hand, and looks at Kara, who’s still tucked in the same cramped position. She gives an irritated shrug when Maggie looks her way and plops down next to her.

Maggie notices the darkened skin on Alex’s arm, a bruise that hadn’t been there before. “Is your arm okay?”

Alex rubs at it. “It’s fine.”

They sit in silence after that, both keeping a close eye on Kara. Every now and again, Maggie catches Alex looking at her out of the corner of her eye. Probably trying to figure out what Maggie was thinking, what she’d seen earlier. But Alex doesn’t bring it up, so Maggie doesn’t either.

Eventually, Kara uncurls herself and sits up on her hands and knees. Her face is blotchy, and she isn’t looking at either of them when she says miserably, “I want to go home.”

“Okay,” Alex says. But there are worry lines on her forehead now, and she looks torn between taking care of her sister or staying with Maggie. Maggie helps her out by going to pack up all of Alex’s and Kara’s things and bringing them back over.

But the worry doesn’t leave Alex’s face, so Maggie looks her in the eye and says as sincerely as she can manage, “It’s okay. You take her home. I’ll see you later.”

Alex nods and doesn’t say much after that, just helps Kara up and walks her back towards the boardwalk, giving Maggie a quick wave before they get too far out of sight. And Maggie stands there for a long while after they’re gone, wishing she had known the right thing to say to reassure Alex that everything was going to be all right.

…

“Psst. Maggie. Maggie.”

Maggie startles awake when she hears the voice. She’d been right on the edge of sleep, hadn’t even heard any footsteps passing overhead. But even half asleep, she knows that voice, so her brain doesn’t panic.

She crawls outside to see Alex, sitting on the ledge of the boardwalk, legs dangling from the side in the dim moonlight.

“Were you asleep?” Alex asks.

“No,” Maggie lies, rubbing the sleep from her eyes and climbing up to sit beside Alex.

“Pfft,” Alex scoffs. “Liar. Sorry; I know it’s late.”

Maggie flushes, glad for the darkness that covers her. “It’s fine. How’s Kara?”

“She’s okay now. But that’s what I wanted to…”

Maggie yawns, and she blames her sleepy state for what blurts out of her mouth, so untactfully. “You want to see if I figured out that Kara’s an alien?”

Alex jerks, her eyes going so wide that Maggie can see even in the dark. “What?” she sputters. “No. That – that’s ridiculous. What are you–”

Maggie backtracks, holding up her hands in a peace offering. “Alex, it’s okay. I know people like to pretend aliens don’t exist and there aren’t any here on earth, but we all know who Superman is, where he came from.”

Alex sputters even more. “But that– that doesn’t mean that–”

“I saw her eyes today, Alex. They were glowing. Heat vision, I’m guessing? And that explains her speed, her strength, how she never gets out of breath, always seems like she’s holding back on something.”

Alex sucks in a breath, her shoulders slumping. “My mom’s going to kill me.”

Maggie reaches out, placing her hand on Alex’s knee. “Hey, no. It’s not like it’s your fault.”

“It will be to her. I’m the one who’s supposed to make sure Kara doesn’t do anything to expose herself when my mom’s not around.”

Alex sounds like she’s about to cry, and Maggie can’t stand it. She pulls Alex into a hug. “It’s not your fault I’m too observant for my own good, okay?” she tries to joke. Alex gives a wet chuckle, and she takes it as a win. “It’s not Kara’s fault either. I’m not going to tell anyone; I promise. I’m not one of those xenophobic losers spouting hate that they show in the news all the time. Kara’s my friend. And I would never out somebody’s secret like that.”

Alex sniffs, some of the tension releasing from her muscles as she lays her head on Maggie’s shoulder. “I know. I know you wouldn’t. I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize. I get the whole ‘parents putting pressure on you for stuff that isn’t even in your control’ thing.”

Alex looks up at her then, and Maggie freezes as she realizes it’s the first time she’s ever mentioned her parents to Alex. But Alex doesn’t ask about it, just leans a little more into Maggie.

“I’m kind of glad you know now. Sometimes it’s hard, having a sister with superpowers and no one to talk to about it.”

“Does Lucy know?”

“Yeah. Kara and I were being stupid one day, testing out her powers. Lucy had followed us and caught us flying around in the woods. That’s why Kara’s banned from using her powers unless she’s supervised.”

“What all can she do?” Maggie asks, curiosity getting the best of her.

“She has all the same powers as Superman,” Alex explains. “Strength, speed, flight. The freeze breath and the heat vision are the ones she’s discovered how to use the most recently. She’s still working on control. And sometimes when she gets upset, she just loses it.”

“So wait, that means that her cousin is actually…”

“Superman, yeah.”

“Whoa.”

“Yeah,” Alex sighs, pulling away from Maggie to lay down on her back, looking up at the stars. “So now you know the big family secret. Or, one of them, at least.”

Maggie lays down too, but she only has eyes for Alex. Alex, who shifts to fold her arm over her eyes, which brings them closer together, pressed up against each other from hip to shoulder, their legs still hanging over the ledge. Alex’s body is warm against the cool breeze blowing in from the ocean, and Maggie feels tingles all along her side from the contact.

It’s a very nice feeling, she decides. I don’t want to move.

Alex laughs suddenly and turns towards her head towards Maggie. Their faces are so close like this, close enough that Maggie can feel the puffs of Alex’s breath.

Alex reaches over until she finds Maggie’s hand and intertwines their fingers. “Thanks, Maggie.”

Maggie blinks, her thoughts starting to get sluggish with sleep again. “For what?”

Alex is looking back up at the sky again, and it’s too dark to really read her expression. “I don’t know. Being you, I guess.”

“Oh,” Maggie says, her heart thumping wildly and making her brain go all stupid. “Anytime.”

That night, she dreams of gentle hands running through her hair, and soft lips pressing against her own.

…

Chapter Text

April 19^th

Maggie’s fingers shake as they hover over the keyboard, and she glances around for the fourth time to make sure she’s well and truly alone.

She’s huddled in the corner at the most secluded computer she could find at the library, and her nerves are already fried from having to ask a librarian for the password to log on.

She’s done everything she could to make sure no one would even see her there, coming to the library in the evening on one of the slowest nights of the week. She doesn’t want any interruptions, she doesn’t want anyone around as she does what she’s about to do.

Satisfied that there’s nobody near, Maggie turns her attention back to the screen in front of her, opens up the search engine, and waits for it to load. She doesn’t have much experience with computers; the-middle-of-nowhere Nebraska was way behind the times in regards to technology. Her family never had one, and of the few occasions she’d gotten to use one in school, most of her time had been spent playing The Oregon Trail and dying of dysentery – whatever that was – while pretending to do the typing exercises they were given.

How do–

She pecks the keys one at a time, and maybe she should have paid more attention to those typing lessons, but oh well.

Her heart is pounding, and she can literally feel herself sweating nervously as she completes the query.

How do you know if you are gay?

She hits the search button before she can stop herself, her shoulders hunching in front of the screen as if to block it from the world.

The results load, and for a moment, Maggie thinks she should just leave, should just forget about it all and pretend that there’s nothing going on with her. But she’s been trying that for so long now, and she’s tired of it, tired of it all, of trying to convince herself she’s something that she’s not.

She opens up the first result. A little rainbow flag icon pops up at the top, and Maggie squirms in her seat, not sure how to describe the feelings she has looking at it. She doesn’t really get much from the article, but there’s a chat forum at the bottom, and the top message reads: There is no exact method of determining whether or not you are homosexual, but the odds are, if you’re questioning your sexuality: you’re probably not straight.

She gets absorbed into it all from there, clicking on website after website, discovering vocabulary and identities she never even knew existed an hour ago. Her eye especially gets caught on every mention of bisexuality she sees, and she reads up on it as much as she can, her thoughts drifting to Lucy the entire time.

But what really catches her focus is every mention of the word lesbian.

Sure, Maggie’s heard the word before. But it’s always been in a negative way – spoken in a scandalized whisper or a dropping of a tone. It was the insult boys would throw at girls on the playground or in gym class when they were better at something and what the guys would call the girls who turned them down for dates. She’s only ever heard it spoken as a dirty word, like it was a disease, like it was a sin just to say.

But here, here on the anonymous pages of the internet, it’s an identity. One that people are proud to claim and live and be.

And she feels herself drawn to it.

Of course, she also comes across plenty of hate, but Maggie doesn’t take the bait, just simply navigates away from those sites and keeps reading.

She’s so engrossed in the screen that she doesn’t even notice the librarian who helped her earlier come back until a throat clears nearby.

Maggie jumps, which in turn makes the woman startle.

“Oh, sorry, dear,” she says apologetically. “Just wanted to let you know we close in fifteen minutes.”

“Oh,” Maggie squeaks out, telling herself to calm down. It wasn’t like she just got caught watching porn or something. She was just… researching. “Okay, thank you.”

She shuts the computer down, uses the bathroom quickly while she has the chance, and leaves after that, blinking in confusion when she gets outside and realizes it’s dark already. She really had lost track of time.

It’s long past the cats’ feeding time, but Maggie takes a chance and makes her way to the back alley anyway, hoping there will still be food waiting for her. Sure enough, there is. It’s long since cooled off, but Maggie doesn’t care. She eats on her way back to the beach, hardly aware of her progress as her thoughts run a mile a minute.

She stares at the ceiling of her tent for a long time that night, just letting her mind drift.

She thinks of long hair and pretty smiles, soft skin and gentle hands, as she has so many times before.

But the difference is this time, she doesn’t stop herself.

This time, she just lets herself feel.

…

April 23^rd

A few days later, Maggie decides she has to talk about it, has to finally let it out before it kills her. And so, when she gets up that morning and sees the note scribbled on a piece of paper taped to her breakfast (Lunch today? -A) she decides that it’s her perfect chance.

Because she trusts Alex and Lucy more than anything, and she wants to tell them. She thinks talking about it might be good for her.

But just in case, if something goes wrong, she’ll be able to leave, while they’ll be stuck on school grounds.

Not that she thinks anything will go wrong, but still.

Better to be prepared.

Maggie’s learned that the hard way.

And so, she spends the morning steeling her nerves, rehearsing what she wants to say in her head over and over again. But when lunchtime rolls around and she gets to their normal spot by the football field, it’s just Alex waiting for her.

“Where’s Lucy?” Maggie asks.

Alex shrugs. “She called out sick this morning.”

“Oh.” Maggie deflates a little, her built-up confidence gone in an instant. She sits down.

Maybe it’s a sign, Maggie can’t stop from thinking. A sign to keep my mouth shut.

Alex hands Maggie her lunch. A sandwich, peanut butter and jelly today.

“Sucks ‘cause of course, today’s the day we had to get paired up for this big project for history,” Alex says around a mouthful of her own sandwich. “I got stuck with some idiot who I know is gonna slack off and leave me to do all the work.”

Maggie hums around her bite of food to let Alex knows she’s listening, but she stays quiet for the most part as Alex continues to rant. It isn’t until Alex says her name in a tone that implies it isn’t the first time she’s said it that Maggie realizes she zoned out.

Alex tilts her head, her face concerned. “Are you okay? Don’t tell me you’re getting sick too.”

Maggie shakes her head. “No, I’m fine. Just thinking.”

“Anything you want to share?”

“Maybe someday,” Maggie sighs. “Maybe someday.”

…

Later, Maggie finds the calico cat and a few others waiting for her in their normal spot a few buildings down from the dog groomers. After checking that the coast is clear, she sits down with them, resting her chin on her knees as they crowd around her. Soon she’s got three purring cats and fur all over her jeans – not that she minds.

“You guys are lucky,” she tells them. “All you have to worry about is where you’ll get your next meal. I have to worry about that, and all this other stupid stuff.” She sighs. “Being human is complicated.”

The calico rubs up against her cheek, tail flicking.

Maggie holds her hand up at cat level, letting them run underneath it from head to tail. “You want to trade? I can be a cat, and you can take care of all my problems for me.”

There’s no answer of course, except maybe the purring getting louder.

Maggie sighs. “Yeah, I wouldn’t want to either.”

…

That night, Maggie’s just on the other side of sleep when the tent door is suddenly unzipped. She shoots up in alarm, her heart pounding, her mind filled with horrible scenarios of the cops finding her.

“It’s just me,” comes Lucy’s voice.

Maggie clutches a hand over her chest, turning her flashlight on so they can see. “Geez, Lucy, you almost gave me a heart attack.”

Lucy doesn’t answer, just crawls up towards Maggie, who scoots over to give her some room.

“What are you doing out so late? Alex told me you were sick today.”

Lucy sniffles, and that’s when Maggie realizes that she’s crying. Her stomach twists in concern, wondering what’s wrong.

“Can I sleep here with you?” Lucy asks, her voice wavering.

She’s climbing into the sleeping bag next to Maggie before she has a chance to even answer, not that she was going to turn her away. She wraps an arm around Lucy, as much as a hug as she can manage in the confined space. The sleeping bag is big enough for the two of them, but just barely.

“What’s going on?”

Lucy wipes at her eyes. “Been fighting with my dad.” She lays down on her side, so Maggie does too, facing her.

Lucy pulls Streaky out from where he got smushed underneath her head when she laid down. She squeezes him to her chest, burying her nose in the fur. Maggie can feel her struggle to take a deep breath for a few minutes until she regains her composure.

When she does, Lucy chuckles bitterly. “We got in an argument last night and I just… I couldn’t sleep afterward. I stayed home without telling him because I was exhausted this morning. But they must have called him at work and when he came home, it was just like added fuel to the fire.”

“What were you fighting about?” Maggie asks, but then reconsiders. “You don’t have to tell me–”

Lucy shakes her head. “It’s fine. We just don’t see eye to eye on a lot of things. It’s been like that ever since my mom died and he got stationed out here.”

She sighs. “He wants a kid that’ll be just like him; West Point, same track in the army, the works. He already failed with Lois when she went into journalism, so it’s all up to me now. He doesn’t care how I feel about the whole thing.” She shakes her head again, shifting a little closer. “All I did was tell him I was thinking about becoming a lawyer and he flipped out.”

And maybe Maggie’s letting her experiences cloud her judgment, because there’s no way that all dads ‘flip out’ that way her father did, but she still feels the need to make sure, inspecting what little she can see of Lucy’s skin for bruises. But all she asks is, “Are you okay?”

Lucy gives her a sad smile. “Yeah. I’ve got a killer headache and I’m exhausted, but I’m fine. Just got sick of being there. Told him I was going to stay with Alex tonight and walked out.”

“Wouldn’t you rather do that? I mean, even Alex’s floor has got to be a whole lot more comfortable than…” she tugs at her sleeping bag. “This.”

Sure, she’s grown to love the little space that’s all hers and the meager amount of possessions she has to her name, but she knows it’s not the most luxurious set-up in the world, especially for someone who’s used to an actual bed.

Lucy shakes her head and blinks slowly, her eyes shining in the dark. “I don’t want to bother her with this right now. Alex got along really well with her dad. She’d give anything to have him back. She doesn’t understand sometimes.”

Maggie takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly, as she tries to come up with something to say to that.

“And you– you think I do?” she finally asks.

Lucy doesn’t answer right away, just reaches over and turns off the flashlight, throwing them both into the dark. She shifts until her head is pressed under Maggie’s chin, Streaky nestled between them.

Just when Maggie decides she’s not going to say anything else, Lucy whispers, “I think there’s a lot you haven’t told us. But some things don’t need to be said.”

…

April 24^th

Maggie’s not sure what wakes her the next morning, but when she tries to roll over to go back to sleep, she finds that she can’t move.

Suddenly more alert, she looks down, sees the sleeping bag pushed down to her hips and an arm wrapped around her waist. She panics for a split second before she remembers Lucy coming over last night.

Lucy, who’s currently pressed against Maggie’s back, holding her lightly.

Her breath is hitting the back of Maggie’s neck in little puffs of air, and she must be a deep sleeper, because she doesn’t so much as twitch as Maggie moves her arm off so she can roll onto her other side. Lucy’s face is peaceful as she sleeps, her hair splayed out on the pillow which she’s hogging. For some reason, Maggie finds herself unable to stop staring at her sleeping friend, as her heart starts a staccato beat in her chest.

It makes her remember all the times she’d shared a bed with Eliza, the butterflies in her stomach and the giddy feeling she had felt that she was never able to place the reason for. But God, those times don’t even hold a candle to what she’s feeling now, waking up next to Lucy.

And okay. Maybe she – maybe she should have realized that she’s gay a lot sooner.

She tenses at the thought, but she inhales through her initial panic.

It’s okay. I can admit it to myself. I like girls.

She looks at Lucy again.

I definitely like girls.

She feels a little thrill run through her at the thought.

She’s broken out of her reverie by an incessant beeping, and she startles as she looks around for the source. It’s coming from Lucy’s watch; she must have set an alarm for school in the morning.

Except Lucy isn’t waking up, doesn’t even seem to hear it, even though it’s grating to Maggie’s ears.

Maggie presses the button she can see on the side, but when that fails to shut the alarm off, she settles for shaking Lucy’s shoulder. “Lucy. Hey, wake up. Your alarm.”

It takes a second, but then Lucy groans and her nose scrunches in such an adorable way that Maggie can’t help but laugh. Lucy reaches out blindly and hits a button, silencing the alarm, but makes no further movement to convince Maggie she’s awake.

Maggie pokes her in the cheek. “C’mon,” she coaxes. “It’s not me that has school.”

Lucy grumbles something unintelligible, but then her eyes are opening. She smiles when she sees Maggie.

“Morning, Sunshine.”

Her voice is hoarse with sleep. (And God, it does something funny to Maggie’s stomach.)

“Hey,” she says softly, ignoring her still-racing heart. “Sleep okay?”

Lucy nods, humming as she stretches her arms out above her head.

“And are you feeling better?” Lucy nods again, and Maggie smiles. “I’m glad.”

Lucy sits up, pulling her legs out of the sleeping bag. “Thanks for letting me stay here.”

“It was no problem.” Lucy’s back is turned now, and Maggie can’t resist a little teasing. “You do snore pretty loud, though.”

Lucy whips around, her face stricken, and Maggie’s composure breaks as she laughs. Lucy hits her shoulder. “I do not snore!”

“Okay, fine!” Maggie concedes. “But you are a pillow-hog.”

They’re still bickering when they crawl outside, although whatever Lucy’s about to say in retaliation gets cut off as she trips over her shoes right outside the entrance to the cave. Maggie can’t help but snort with laughter as Lucy hits the sand, but she quickly holds out her hand to try and help Lucy up.

Lucy swats her hand away and gets up herself, giving her a grumpy look, which only makes Maggie laugh harder.

A throat clears from the steps, and Maggie whirls around to see Alex standing there staring at them both.

Alex blinks, looking at Maggie, then Lucy – who’s dusting the sand off her pants – then back at Maggie. Maggie finds herself blushing., although she doesn’t know why exactly.

“What did I miss?” Alex asks.

Lucy walks over and snatches the bag she’s holding out of her hands. “I’ll tell you later,” she promises, looking over the food Alex brought for Maggie. “Did you bring me breakfast too?”

Alex swipes the bag back and passes it over to Maggie, out of Lucy’s reach. “No.”

Lucy pouts, her tone that playfully teasing one she only seems to get with Alex and Maggie. “I get it. You only care about Maggie because she’s your favorite.”

“Wha– No– I,” Alex sputters. “I didn’t even know you were here!”

Lucy doesn’t even seem to be listening as she gives a resigned sigh. “I can’t really blame you. Maggie’s my favorite too.”

Alex shoots Maggie a look that clearly says, what’s up with her?  

She shrugs and raises her eyebrows, hopes Alex understands her unspoken, she’s your problem now.

Alex seems to, for she grumbles. “It’s too early for this.”

Lucy beams. “You know you love me.”

Right as they’re about to leave, Alex promising to get Lucy some food inside, Lucy turns and presses a kiss to Maggie’s cheek.

“Thanks, Maggie,” she whispers.

“Anytime.”

(Her cheek tingles for the rest of the day.)

…

May 5^th

April bleeds into May almost before Maggie can blink.

She still hasn’t broached the subject of her sexuality with Alex and Lucy, even though she’s had plenty of opportunities since the night Lucy came to stay with her, even though she actually wants to.

She’s just scared of what might happen.

But like an old dam, the pressure builds up and up, until the wave bursts over her with little warning.

They’re lying on the beach on Saturday – Lucy and Alex on either side with Maggie in the middle – when the words bubble up unbidden in her throat. She can’t stop them, and before she knows it, she’s blurting,

“Can I tell you guys a secret?”

She can’t look at either of them, choosing instead to continue staring up at the blue sky with the one lone, fluffy cloud in the corner of her vision. But she can feel Alex and Lucy both turn to look at her, and Alex nudges her shoulder in encouragement.

“Yeah.”

“’Course you can, Sunshine,” Lucy chimes in.

And what she means to say – what she’s practiced saying in her head – is I’m a lesbian, or even I’m gay. But she finds those options are too overwhelming for her first time speaking it out loud. She’s still too afraid of the commitment they hold, doesn’t feel anything close to the ‘pride’ she had seen all those strangers claim on the internet when they spoke those labels. What instead comes out is:

“I like girls.”

It’s quiet and lilting, like she’s not quite sure if it’s a question or not, but she’s said it and it’s out there and her heart is pounding and her palms are sweaty as she waits for a reaction.

She isn’t quite sure what she expected that reaction to be, but it definitely isn’t anything she had pictured.

Lucy jolts up, a wide smile on her face and her eyes filled with an expression that Maggie can’t even hope to name, but it’s warm and light and so, so good.

And there’s hope blooming in Maggie’s chest, but it only lasts a second because then Alex–

Alex isn’t saying anything.

Alex is sitting up.

Alex is turning away.

And Maggie realizes she’s about to face a whole nother rejection, and this time she’s sure it will crush her into pieces so small she’ll never be able to put herself back together again.

But then Alex laughs.

She laughs, and her shoulders shake as her hair covers her face.

Maggie sits up, feels Lucy place a hand on the small of her back.

Alex brings a hand up to her face to push her hair back, and that’s when Maggie sees the tears in her eyes, tears that bleed over and track down her cheeks as she turns and looks at the two of them.

“Me too,” she chokes out, and now Maggie can see she’s laughing and crying at the same time. “Me too. I like girls too.”

And Maggie’s fear drains away for good because Alex’s tone is a mix of relief and joy and something so utterly free that it’s contagious.

“Really?” Maggie asks, her voice small and wavering. She feels Lucy’s arm move to wrap around her, while her other hand reaches out towards Alex.

Alex grasps onto Lucy’s fingers and holds on like it’s her only lifeline. She nods. “After what happened at school, I’ve been so scared to admit it. But it’s true.”

And now Maggie’s crying too, although she’s surprised to realize that she’s not ashamed of it this time.

Because she’s not alone.

And then she’s a mess of tears and hysteria, but so is Alex, and Lucy’s squeezing them both into a tight hug. A kiss is pressed to Maggie’s forehead, and then Alex’s.

“I love you both so much, you know that, right?” Lucy says fiercely, her own tears choking her voice. “You are both so, so beautiful. No matter what anyone ever tells you. What you feel is real and beautiful and perfect, just like you. And I’m always going to be here for you.”

And it clicks then, what Maggie had seen earlier in Lucy’s eyes, and she lets herself bask in it for the first time in a long time as they all continue to cling to each other.

Love.

…

Chapter Text

May 12^th

“You know,” Lucy says, suddenly reaching over and letting her fingers trail through Maggie’s hair, “I could give you a trim, even up the ends a little.”

They’re watching movies in Alex’s living room again, after Alex’s mom got called in for an emergency surgery early in the morning and Alex had managed to coax Maggie inside for a late breakfast. Kara was spending the morning with a friend apparently, and Lucy had joined them not too long after Maggie and Alex finished eating.

Maggie raises her eyebrows skeptically from where she’s sitting next to Lucy on the couch. She had felt Lucy’s eyes on her for the last few minutes, but the offer still had come out of nowhere. “Do you even know how to cut hair?”

“She’s made me her test subject a couple times already,” Alex chimes in, pulling her hair over to one side as she looks down at the ends. “Didn’t do too bad a job.”

Lucy lobs a pillow at her, hitting Alex squarely in the face. “Excuse you, I did a great job and you know it.”

Maggie sees Alex eyeing the pillow now on the floor and snags it before Alex can retaliate. “Sure,” she says, taking Lucy up on the offer before the two of them get too rowdy.

Now that her hair has had some time to grow back out, the hatch-job she’d done with her pocket-knife had started to bug her every time she saw herself in a mirror. The truth is that she really misses her long hair, but she figures a trim with some actual scissors would be nice. And she trusts Lucy to do it a whole lot more than she trusts herself.

Which is how she finds herself sitting in the middle of Alex’s kitchen with a towel draped over herself. After Maggie had admitted to never getting a haircut at an actual salon before, Lucy had insisted on the full experience. Alex is perched on the table in front of her, propping up the framed mirror Lucy had made her take down from the wall in the hallway to give it even more of the effect.

“I still don’t understand why we couldn’t have just done this in the bathroom,” Alex grumbles, doing her best to see around the side of the huge mirror.

“Because that’s not as much fun. Now stop moving so I can work.” Lucy has her tongue sticking out as she concentrates, pulling on the ends of Maggie’s hair as she looks at what she’s dealing with.

Alex gives up trying to watch and there’s a thunk that Maggie’s pretty sure is her forehead hitting the back of the frame as she lets out a dramatic sigh.

Lucy starts by getting Maggie’s hair wet so that she has a straight length to work with and then brushes the strands out behind her back. Tingles start up in her scalp at the gentle pull of the brush and Maggie’s eyes close almost immediately at the blissful feeling. She’s always loved people playing with her hair.

The actual trim takes Lucy less than five minutes. She uses Alex’s blow-dryer to dry Maggie’s hair and then prods Maggie when she’s done to look in the mirror. Maggie gives a nod of approval, wondering if she can get Lucy to play hairdresser for a little while longer.

Lucy must read her mind because her fingers find her hair again, nails scratching lightly at her scalp. “Want me to do a braid or something?”

Maggie nods right as a loud bang comes from the front of the house, followed by the sound of running footsteps.

“Alex! Alex!” Kara shouts excitedly before she even makes it past the living room. “It was so much fun! We took the dogs to the park and there were even more dogs! And I met a big black one named Bruno and belly rubs are his favorite and he also likes playing fetch and so I threw the ball for him and I didn’t even throw it too hard! And then–” Kara rounds the corner into the kitchen and slides to a stop with her sock-clad feet, her face getting even brighter somehow when she sees the other two. “Lucy! Maggie!”

“Hi, Kara,” Lucy greets, her hands still trailing through Maggie’s hair.

Alex swings her legs underneath the table, having placed the mirror down beside her. “I’m taking it that you had a good time, Kara?”

“The best!” Kara says, throwing her arms up in the air for emphasis. “What are you guys doing?”

Maggie and Lucy answer at the same time.

“Lucy cut my hair.”

“Braiding.”

“Ooh,” Kara says. “Somebody do my hair!”

And so, Kara ends up in a chair in front of Alex as she tries to copy the easy way Lucy’s braiding Maggie’s hair. Lucy’s are neat and uniform, and the way she combs them out gently before trying a different style is effortless.

Alex gives up after a fifth sloppy attempt, frowning down at Kara’s hair. “There’s a reason why I don’t usually do a lot with my hair. This is the reason.”

“It’s okay, Alex,” Kara tells her matter-of-factly, patting her on the shoulder sympathetically.  “You’re good at other things.”

Maggie tries not to laugh too hard at the offended look on Alex’s face as Lucy takes over, giving Kara a simple braid, which Kara leaves in for the rest of the day.

They decide to do something else then, but before they can make up their minds as to what, Kara realizes that this is the first time Maggie’s been in the house with her there, and she insists on showing Maggie her room.

Kara’s room turns out to be right next to Alex’s, but Maggie had been more than a little preoccupied with her own embarrassment the last time she was upstairs, so it’s the first time she’s seen it. It’s laid out similarly to her sister’s, but where Alex has books lying on nearly every surface, Kara has art supplies. There are paper and markers and tubes of paint everywhere Maggie can see, and an easel with a blank canvas propped up by the desk. A couple of finished pieces hang on the walls, mostly landscapes, and Maggie’s struck dumb by the complexity of them. But Kara pulls her over to the bed before she can comment on them.

A stack of medals hangs off one of the bedposts, and Maggie recognizes the top one from the night she first met the Danvers sisters.

Kara introduces her to Krypto, a stuffed dog with a red ribbon around its neck just like Streaky’s. Then she pulls the curtains over the window closed to show Maggie “the best part.”

 Kara moves back across the room, shuts the door, and flips the light switch, plunging them into sudden darkness. “Look,” she says.

Maggie blinks her eyes a few times to adjust and then takes in what exactly Kara’s talking about. There’s a faint glow coming from the ceiling and Maggie gasps as she looks up. The whole ceiling is covered in hundreds and hundreds of glow-in-the-dark stars.

They’re in various sizes and look like they’re arranged in an actual order, although Maggie doesn’t know too much about astronomy to be sure. Still, it’s impressive, and just about the coolest thing she’s ever seen.

“Wow,” she says in awe. “This is amazing.”

Kara nods in agreement. “Alex and I aren’t allowed out on the roof anymore, so this was the next best thing.”

Maggie knows there’s a story there, and she’s about to ask what it is when they’re interrupted by a call from downstairs.

“Kara, Maggie! Let’s go get lunch!”

Lucy drives them to the diner, where a worker is in the middle of hanging up some flyers in the window when they walk through the door.

“We’re going to the party, right, Alex?” Kara asks as they claim a booth.

“Of course we are. Lucy and I already signed up to play in the match.”

Seeing Maggie’s look of confusion, Lucy points back at one of the posters and explains. “There’ll be another beach party in a couple weeks, with an under-eighteen volleyball scrimmage. Alex and I are planning on scoping out our competition for the league this summer.”

Kara hops in her seat. “Maggie, are you going to come? We can make s’mores this time!”

Maggie sees the hopeful way Alex is looking at her – an exact replica of Kara’s expression – as if she could possibly have other plans that night or could pass up an opportunity of free food.

“How could I say no to that?”

…

May 25^th

The beach party in question turns out to be a really big deal in Midvale. Maggie notices more and more flyers going up as the date approaches, and it seems to be just about all people can talk about. It’s the last big celebration before the summer crowds start coming in, which all the locals seem to take very seriously.

The night of, Maggie gets there right around the time things start kicking off, looking around for her friends. The whole stretch of beach by the pier is sectioned off for the party, and it seems like just about the whole town’s come out for the festivities.

The setup is a lot like the one from the night Maggie had first come to Midvale. There’s a bonfire at the heart of it, with a food tent and plenty of grills going off to one side. There’re lights strung up for when it gets dark and music blasting from speakers placed throughout the sand. At the other end, a couple of volleyball nets have been set up, and that’s where she sees Alex and Lucy.

She’s heading their way when Kara comes out of nowhere and nearly tackles her into a hug. “Maggie, you made it!”

“’Course I did. I was promised s’mores after all.”

“Yes!” Kara bounces on her toes excitedly, clapping her hands together. “But Alex made me promise to wait until after they’re done playing to eat.”

Alex and Lucy are doing some stretches when Kara and Maggie make their way over, warming up for their first game. They’re both in tank tops and running shorts and Maggie’s mouth goes dry in a way that has her clearing her throat multiple times before she can even say hello.

Unlike Maggie’s first night in Midvale, she and Kara sit and watch them play. Kara’s in good spirits and not too overwhelmed by the noise and the crowd, and Maggie’s stomach doesn’t clench in fear this time when she looks at Alex or Lucy moving across the court and thinks about how pretty they are.

(It clenches for an entirely different reason, but after coming out and getting that weight off her chest, she’s been letting herself realize that it’s not such a bad thing.)

She likes them. She knows she does. In the months since they’ve all gotten to know each other, Maggie has fallen for Alex and Lucy. And it’s much stronger than anything she had ever felt for Eliza Wilkie.

Does it scare her, realizing that she has a crush on two different people just barely after coming to terms with her sexuality? Maybe, but Maggie has been observing more and more tiny details lately – all the little glances the three of them have been sharing, the teasing remarks that Lucy only ever seems to reserve for her and Alex, the way Alex’s entire being goes soft and content and happy when it’s just the three of them, with no secrets about who they are anymore – and she’s come to the conclusion that she isn’t the only one having these feelings.

And whether it’s due to nature or nurture, Maggie’s always been good at reading other people.

She’s pulled out of her musings by Kara cheering loudly when Alex and Lucy win their second game. She zones back in and cheers with Kara and tries to stop herself from blushing when Lucy winks at her.

Somewhere in the third round, the hairs on the back on her neck stand up as she senses someone’s eyes on her. She looks around, but everyone she can see is focused on the game. But then she spots a familiar figure on the other side of the court, one whose head turns just as Maggie looks their way.

Cat Lady.

Kara’s sitting between her legs at this point, so Maggie shrinks down a little more behind her, wondering if Cat Lady had really been watching her.

Kara must sense her sudden tension, as she leans back against Maggie’s chest and asks, “Are you okay?”

Maggie brings her attention back to the game, just as Alex scores a point. “Yeah,” she tells Kara. “Just getting hungry.”

“Me too,” Kara whines. “I shouldn’t have pinky-promised.”

Maggie chuckles dryly. When she takes another look, Cat Lady’s nowhere in sight, and she relaxes again as the night goes on.

Alex and Lucy win three of the five games they play, which they seem happy with. Kara’s ready to bowl people over to get some of the hamburgers they can smell cooking, so she takes off as soon as Alex and Lucy rejoin them. Lucy laughs and grabs one of Alex’s hands and then one of Maggie’s and pulls them both after Kara.

They sit near the fire after grabbing plenty of food. Maggie eats almost as much as Kara and nearly chokes on her laughter as Alex recounts the story of Lucy’s first volleyball game and how she had given two people black eyes by spiking the ball in their faces.

Lucy has to leave shortly after they finish dinner, as she and her dad have plans to spend the holiday weekend with her sister. He had only agreed on her coming to the party if they still left that evening for the drive. She kisses Maggie on the cheek to say goodbye and then steals Alex’s sweatshirt and runs off before Alex can get it back.

“You know you love me, and I need something to remember you by.”

“You’ll be gone for less than three days!”

“So you won’t miss it then? ‘Kay, thanks, bye!”

Kara wanders off in search of more food after that, which leaves Maggie alone with Alex.

 Alex, who flops over onto her side and puts her head in Maggie’s lap, still huffing about the audacity Lucy has, oblivious to the way the contact makes Maggie’s brain short-circuit.

And then to make it worse, words are coming out of Maggie’s mouth before she can think them through.

 “You, uh, you and Lucy looked really good today. Playing with each other. Together! I mean together!” She swallows. “I–I mean… Volleyball.” She bites down on her lip to shut herself up.

Very smooth.

Alex turns on her back so she’s looking up at Maggie, her expression such a perfect replica of Lucy’s cocky smirk that Maggie swallows thickly. Raises an eyebrow like she’s enjoying Maggie’s flustered rambling way too much. “Did we now?”

And Maggie opens her mouth, maybe possibly to say something even more embarrassing, but then she gets that prickly feeling on the back of her neck again and her face falls. She looks up and spots Cat Lady by the food tent, her gaze possibly trained in Maggie and Alex’s direction, but too far away to tell for sure.

Alex must feel Maggie tense. She sits up, taking Maggie’s hand. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Maggie says, licking her lips. “It’s just– There’s this woman over there that I know. Or, not really know, but… she saw me stealing from the bakery when you were–” She cuts herself off, not wanting Alex to feel more guilty about the time she was grounded. “Anyway, she’s been leaving food out for me every night for a while now. I think she’s been watching me tonight.”

“Who?” Alex asks, looking around.

Maggie goes to point her out, but Cat Lady’s disappeared. “She was by the grills. I don’t see her now.”

Alex leans into Maggie’s side. “Okay, well, do you think she’s going to turn you in or something?”

Maggie considers the question. It’s one she’s been trying not to think about for a while. “I don’t know. She hasn’t tried to talk to me or anything. I should probably just stop going back and taking the food. Then I wouldn’t have to worry about it.”

Alex’s brow furrows. “I can get more for you to eat,” she offers. “My mom buys snacks and stuff in bulk. Perks of having a sister with a crazy fast metabolism. I can try to sneak out after dinner more and–”

Maggie cuts her off with a shake of her head. “It’s okay. I don’t– I don’t want to be a burden. And I don’t want you to have to lie to your mom if she catches you.”

“You are not a burden, Maggie. I just don’t want you to get in trouble. Have you–” Alex stops mid-question like she doesn’t know if she should ask or not. She continues in a quiet voice. “Have you thought about trying to get some help yet?”

Maggie shakes her head harder. “No, I–I can’t– I’m just a runaway kid; no one will listen to me. They’ll just…” Her breaths start to come faster as fear claws its way into her chest. “They’ll just send me back and I can’t–” She chokes on air.

Alex pulls her into a hug. “Hey, no, I’m sorry. Just breathe. You’re okay.”

But Maggie can’t stop talking. “I like it here, with you and Lucy. I want to stay. I think meeting you two has been good for me. I don’t want them to take me away.”

Alex doesn’t press her to explain herself further, just rubs her back to help soothe her. “Meeting you has been good for me too,” she admits softly. “We’re going to help you figure this out. School’ll be out soon; that should make things easier for you, and we’ll have a lot more time to spend together. I promise you that it’ll all be okay.”

That’s a heavy promise, Maggie thinks, but it’s enough to let her heart-rate slow down.

She stays in Alex’s arms until she’s fully calmed down, and Alex doesn’t bring the subject up again, just talks about random things until Kara eventually comes back, her arms overloaded with packages of chocolate and graham crackers and a bag of marshmallows.

The three of them end up making s’mores at the bonfire until the party starts breaking up around ten o’clock. By then, Maggie’s been distracted long enough from her panic and she’s in a good mood once again. It helps that Kara gets chocolate and marshmallow smeared around her face and all she does is chase Alex around with her sticky fingers when she tries to point it out.

Alex warns her before they part for the night not to go straight back to her tent, as she and Kara are most likely going to walk home along the beach with their mom, and it would be best to avoid any accidental confrontations. Maggie promises to give them a good half-hour head start, figuring it’s a nice enough night for an aimless stroll before bed anyway.

She lets her feet carry her a few blocks away from the boardwalk, away from the rest of the partygoers returning home, and walks along one of the main streets downtown.

She’s getting sleepy, stomach full and coming down from way too much sugar and a surprising amount of emotions for one night, so all she can really think about is climbing into her sleeping bag and going to bed.

And that’s why she doesn’t notice the person coming up behind her until it’s too late.

…

Chapter Text

Maggie’s heart jumps into her throat when a hand grabs her wrist from behind. She’s spun around before she can even think to scream and that’s when she sees who stopped her.

Logan.

“Hey Maggie, ‘member me? I wanted to talk to you.”

His speech is slurred, and Maggie can smell the beer on his breath. She already has a bad feeling about this, but then she notes that the streetlights nearest them are out, that there’s absolutely no one around them, and dread sinks her stomach like a stone.

(She was so stupid, not paying attention to her surroundings, letting someone as obviously intoxicated as he is sneak up on her. She should know better to never let her guard down.)

She lets out a shaky breath, trying not to sound as scared as she is. “Why would you want to talk to me? I don’t even know you.”

Logan’s got her arm in a tight grip, a half-empty beer bottle clutched in his other hand. His nose, Maggie notices with a sliver of pride towards Alex, is much more crooked than the last time she saw him.

“I was watching you tonight. Saw you with Danvers. The way you were looking at her. The way she was looking back at you. I think you could help me.”

Maggie’s so busy trying to think of a way to get at the pocket-knife in her backpack – in case this goes south the way she thinks it will – that she barely takes in what he’s saying. Later – she can think about how sick and twisted she feels at the thought of Logan watching her interactions with Alex.

Right now, she needs to buy herself some time. “Help you how?” she asks.

He gives her a crooked, sleazy grin. “If you hook up with Danvers, then Lucy can finally get over this whole lesbo phase and come back to me.”

That stops Maggie cold, and anger suddenly clouds her vision, making her forget for a fateful second just how much of a predicament she’s in. Making her forget how much bigger he is, probably five-ten and twice her weight to her barely five-foot, one hundred-pound frame.

She tries to yank her arm back, bristling with outrage. “First of all,” she spits. “It’s not a ‘phase,’” she air-quotes with her free hand, “and Lucy isn’t a lesbian. She likes guys too. Just not you, because you’re a douchebag.”

Logan blinks as her words sink into his brain, his face contorting in fury. “Shut your mouth!” he snaps, pushing her up against the wall behind her hard enough for the breath to leave her lungs.

Her left arm, still stuck in his grip, twists painfully with the sudden collision, knuckles scraping against the bricks. The bottle in his other hand shatters as he slams it inches away from Maggie’s cheek, splashing beer and broken glass down her shoulder.

“Think you’re better than me. No wonder you get along with Danvers. You both like to talk back.”

Maggie’s terror engulfs her as he spits in her face, and for a second, it’s her father that she sees before her, not Logan. But she can’t lose it here, can’t let herself panic like last time, not when she still has to get away.

She lashes out, hitting him right in the place below the ribs that she knows from firsthand experience hurts unbelievably badly when struck.

“Get away from me!”

And it works – Logan doubles over, winded, his grip finally loosening, and Maggie sees her escape, knows that the terror and adrenaline in her system will by far outrun the alcohol in his, except–

The broken bottleneck is still in his hand. And of course – because Maggie’s pretty sure at this point that the universe has it out for her – it slices at just the right angle to catch her arm as Logan stumbles back.

Maggie gasps with the sudden pain, clutching at her arm with her other hand, and when she lets go to look, her fingers are covered in blood.

A lot of blood.

Logan straightens up and looks between Maggie’s bloody hand and the glass still in his, seeming to sober up as his eyes widen in horror. He lets out a strangled wheeze, and the bottleneck slips from his fingers and shatters the rest of the way on the pavement.

“Shi–”

Maggie doesn’t know what Logan’s going to do next, but all thoughts of getting out of there are gone, her legs frozen with shock and pain and fear. But by some miracle, all he does is take a wobbling step back, his eyes still locked on her arm, and then suddenly he’s bolting down the street without another word.

And Maggie’s left just standing there, shaking like a leaf as blood drips down her fingers to the sidewalk.

It takes her a little bit to come back to herself, and she looks up at the moon when she realizes she’s alone. “Why?” she asks, her teeth clenched in pain and her heart feeling like it’s about to beat its way out of her chest. “Why is it always me?”

She presses her palm back over the wound and cradles her arm close to her stomach. She feels as if she might just collapse with the shock of it all, but she forces her feet to start moving, although she doesn’t have a clue what to do next.

What she should do is go to Alex, get some help. But Alex’s anger from that day in the diner is all too vivid in Maggie’s mind and she’s too panicked right now to handle it if Alex were to get mad. She doesn’t want to give Alex another reason to hate Logan, doesn’t want to be the reason Alex does something really reckless and gets in trouble.

There’s been too much violence tonight already, and besides, Maggie’s not worth that.

She just needs to calm down. Tending to her own injuries is nothing she hasn’t had to deal with before.

So she tries to keep pressure on the cut to staunch the bleeding as she walks on shaky legs back to the boardwalk, where the lifeguard shack is with the single-stall restrooms.

She makes sure no one’s following her this time before she locks herself in one – double-checking that the door is actually locked behind her – and then she drops her backpack on the floor, peeling her fingers off her arm to inspect the damage.

She can’t really see much beyond the blood, so she uses a wet paper towel to clean it off. The cut that’s revealed makes her think of the time she crashed her bike when she was ten and the pedal had torn into her leg. She grimaces at the memory.

She looks at herself in the dirty mirror to distract herself from how squeamish she suddenly feels. There’s broken glass sparkling in her hair and her clothes smell like beer and she’s so repulsed by it all that she has to clutch on to the sink with her good arm as she gags, her knees buckling.

Pull yourself together, Maggie, she tells herself angrily.

She looks down again, and that’s when she notices her watch.

The plastic is scratched and the face itself is cracked, four 8s blinking back at her from where the time should be.

She presses the buttons on the side that change the settings: it gives the normal beep but nothing else happens. Maggie feels anger spark hot behind her eyes, thinking about the way her arm had slammed against the building when Logan shoved her.

“Idiot,” she hisses, not knowing if she’s talking about herself or Logan at this point. She rips the watch from her wrist and flings it on the floor. It hits the tiles and slides to the corner of the room.

Her anger drains just as quickly as it came, instantly replaced by regret. She scrambles to pick the watch back up, cradling it gently like it could make up for any more damage she’s just caused. But now the screen is completely blank, and it doesn’t even so much as beep when she presses the buttons.

As ridiculous as it is, it’s this that makes Maggie break. Because Alex had given her this watch – the first thing anyone had given her in a long, long time – and maybe it’s stupid, but it’s special to her.

And now it’s busted.

Her legs really do give out then, and Maggie curls into herself on the floor, as the pain in her chest overwhelms her.

She doesn’t know how long she cries, but she’s woozy when she’s finally able to lift her head off her knees. She wipes her eyes when she feels her head start to spin, knowing she needs to get herself together.

First order of business is to get cleaned up. Save the crying for later, stupid.

She stands back up and strips off her shirt, dropping it on the floor to deal with later. Then she shakes all the bits of glass she can see out of her hair and uses one hand to lather it up with soap from the wall dispenser, washing out the beer as best she can in the sink. It’s not perfect, but it’ll do for now, and her arm is throbbing too much at that point for her to really care if she gets all the suds out or not.

She digs around in her backpack for something she can use as a bandage, cursing the fact that she’s given little thought to acquiring first aid supplies until now. She settles for her old gym shirt, since it’s the one she’s least likely to miss. The constant wear and tear have made it threadbare enough as it is, and a hole has started to rip in one of the armpits anyway.

She tears off a strip from the bottom hem, and then folds up some paper towels and presses them gently to the cut, which had – thankfully – stopped bleeding. She’s able to press the edges of the wound together and she realizes that it could have been a lot worse.

She still feels better when the wound is out of sight, and she completes the makeshift bandage by binding it with the strip of shirt fabric.

The pain’s receded to a dull ache now as long as she doesn’t jostle it, which she can deal with just fine. She’s handled – and hidden – much worse before.

She cleans up the mess she’s made in the sink and puts the broken watch back on. Her wrist feels bare without it and ruined or not, she’s not willing to part with it just yet.

She throws on her sunshine shirt, needing the comfort it provides. She also pulls on her old, ratty sweatshirt to ensure that her wrapped arm stays covered. She knows she’ll have to be careful to not take it off the next few days, no matter how warm she gets in it. She doesn’t need anyone asking questions about what happened.

She has no clue what time it is without a watch to tell her, but she figures it’s close to midnight by the time she makes it back to her tent. She collapses into her sleeping bag and curls up with Streaky, trying to pretend that the last part of the night never happened.

It’s exactly how she used to feel after crawling into bed after a bad night with her father, and she tries not to think about that too.

…

May 28^th

Maggie spends the weekend after Logan’s assault trying to push it out of her mind. She’s disgusted, and she knows she’ll have to talk about it with Lucy, and probably Alex, just in case he tries anything with them as well. But she keeps it to herself for the time being, needing time to process, and if she’s a little more cautious about going out by herself after dark, well, who can blame her?

But hiding her injury might turn out to be harder than Maggie thought it would be. And that’s saying something, because she’s had a lot of practice with it growing up.

She gets the genius idea of using pads instead of the paper towels when she finally gets up and drags herself to the showers on Saturday and sees the torn paper bits and sand grains that had somehow gotten into the wound. But as she’s already learned: sand has a way of getting everywhere she doesn’t want it to be, and it’s all she can do to try to keep the wound clean.

Despite her best efforts, when Monday rolls around, Maggie’s a little worried about how the wound’s been, well, not healing. The skin around the cut just seems to be getting increasingly red, and she’s pretty sure the pus that’s now coming out of it isn’t a good sign.

(She’s been trying not to think about it.)

But it’s harder to ignore her decreasing appetite and lack of energy she’s had the past three days. She hasn’t gone to get her normal dinner from Cat Lady, and yes, part of it is because she’s scared of another confrontation with anyone after what happened after the party, but not all of it.

Which leads her to her current dilemma, eating lunch with Kara and Alex on the boardwalk after they invited her to go to the beach with them to celebrate the holiday. The promise of summer is in the air, which the Danvers sisters both seem excited about, and Maggie would maybe be feeding off their infectious energy if she currently wasn’t so uncomfortable.

It’s hot outside, and she feels like she’s melting inside of her sweatshirt even with the air conditioning that’s currently blowing over their heads as they sit at the counter. She’s only managed to take a bite or two of her pizza, but something about the smell of the grease or the gooey cheese is making her stomach flip.

She drops the barely-touched slice back onto her plate and slides it Kara’s way, knowing she’ll have no problem finishing it. She tries to do it when Alex isn’t looking, and while Kara gives her a funny look, she accepts the food just the same.

Unfortunately, Alex notices anyway, and cuts off her re-telling of Kara’s first Memorial Day as a Danvers mid-story.

“Are you okay?” she asks, eyeing Maggie. “I’ve never seen you pass up food before.”

Maggie takes a sip of water to try to quell her churning stomach. “I’m fine.”

Alex pushes, leaning closer. “You sure? You look a little pale.”

“I’m fine,” Maggie snaps. She doesn’t mean to, but she’s cranky and doesn’t want to admit that Alex is on to something. Her fist clenches involuntarily and the cut feels like it’s burning.

Alex holds her hands up in surrender. “Okay, okay, sorry I asked.”

Maggie takes a deep breath through her nose, willing herself to calm down. “No, I’m sorry. It’s just–” She flounders for some excuse for her short temper. “Cramps,” she decides on lamely.

“Ohhh,” Alex says, reaching out to run her hand along Maggie’s back. “That sucks.”

The truth is that Maggie hasn’t gotten her period yet, but she knows it’s coming soon, and she’s trying so hard to convince herself that it’s what’s been making her feel so bad.

Because if that’s really all it is, she can deal with it.

Alex’s touch feels nice, and Maggie finds herself absentmindedly leaning into it. Alex must notice this, as she keeps the pressure steady and finishes up her food one-handed.

“Do you want to do something else today? We don’t have to go swimming.”

Maggie shakes her head. “It’s fine. I might just stay on the beach though if that’s okay.”

“Of course. And let me know if it gets worse?”

Maggie nods, feeling guilty for lying to her.

When they get down to the beach, Alex breaks away to go the rental stand, leaving Kara and Maggie to pick a spot to lay out the blanket they brought along. Alex comes back carrying a huge umbrella, which she drives deep into the sand and angles it to give the maximum amount of shade possible.

The beach is crowded for the holiday, and Alex spends a good fifteen minutes pointing out how to tell who’s a tourist or not and making fun of some of the ridiculous set-ups around them. Maggie finds herself curling up under the shade with her towel as a pillow, grateful to be laying down again, even though the day isn’t even halfway over.

“Do you want to take this off?” Alex asks softly, tugging at the hood of Maggie’s sweatshirt. She’s no doubt noticed how much Maggie’s been sweating in it.

“No!” Maggie says frantically, pulling the hem down as far as it’ll stretch down her waist, holding it tight.

The reaction probably makes it so obvious that she’s hiding something, but she can’t help it. And she wants to kick herself, because she’s been hiding wounds all her life, hiding them from the little amount of friends she’s had, hiding them from her teachers, even hiding them from her mom, before she realized her mother knew all about what her father did to her, and never tried to put a stop to it, never tried to help her.

So why does it feel like this time is so out of control?

Alex pulls her hands back quickly, giving Maggie space. “Sorry. Just thought it might make you a little more comfortable.”

Maggie feels bad; Alex is just looking out for her, and all she’s doing is being mean. “I want to leave it on,” she says quietly, and then, to fill in the awkward silence that follows and to give her hands something to do, she rolls over to grab the book she’s been reading out of her backpack.

Alex turns her attention to Kara then, and Maggie lets out a sigh of relief as she finds the chapter she left off on.

The sound of the waves lulls her, and Maggie thinks about how she’s gotten so used to hearing it as she goes to sleep. She wonders, if she does have to leave here, if she’ll ever be able to get through the night without the soothing noise again.

Speaking of sleep, she reads the same line four times over before she realizes her eyelids are growing heavy, exhaustion quickly catching up to her. Last night’s rest could be described as fitful at best, and while she doesn’t really want to fall asleep here, her body makes the decision for her, and the world fades out before she knows it.

She blinks awake later, not sure how much time has passed. Alex and Kara are sitting in the sun at the other end of the blanket, working on a sandcastle that must be ninety percent Alex’s doing, if the way it’s still standing is any indication. Maggie can see they’re both in just their swimsuits now, but neither one of them look like they’ve gone in the water while she napped. (And Maggie would know the distinction, considering all the times she’s seen the way Alex’s hair curls as it dries after coming out of the ocean.)

Kara’s the one to notice she’s awake, but it’s Alex that turns around with a smile on her face. “Feeling any better?”

“Yeah,” Maggie lies again, putting as much oomph into her voice as she can muster, but she has to clear her throat around how dry it is.

She actually feels worse than she did when she had first laid down, but she doesn’t want Alex to know that, because then she would worry, and that would mean that there is something to worry about, which there isn’t.

Maggie’s fine.

She’s fine.

Everything’s fine.

“You didn’t go swimming?” she asks.

Kara flops onto her back and tilts her head so she can look at Maggie upside-down. “I didn’t want to. There’s too many people.”

Maggie reads between the lines, because she knows by now that when Kara’s concerned about somebody, she likes to stay close.

“We’ll go next time, okay?”

Kara’s face lights up, and it’s adorable with the way her bangs have fallen away from her forehead. “Next time!” she repeats, reaching her hand out towards Maggie. “Pinky-promise!”

Maggie has to stretch to reach, and the skin of her arm pulls as her pinky interlocks with Kara’s. She winces as she pulls back, which doesn’t go unnoticed by Alex by the look she shoots Maggie.

“Arm’s numb,” she says before Alex can open her mouth. “Think I slept on it weird.”

Alex seems to buy it, but the focus shifts off her anyway as Kara twists around to her stomach, her foot knocking into the sandcastle and completely destroying it on the way.

“Kara!” Alex smacks her forehead. “How do you manage to do that every time?”

Kara gives her sister a sheepish grin. “Oops?”

…

May 29^th

Maggie wakes the next day feeling even more sluggish than the day before. She had a restless night again, and she debates whether she should even get up at all. In the end though, she has to pee and it’s uncomfortably hot in the tent, so she does.

Her legs are wobbly when she stands up outside, so she sits down to put her shoes on. She notices a brown blob next to her, and she has to blink several times before her brain registers it as the breakfast left for her, with two notes stuck to the front.

She smiles faintly at the messages, especially the sun drawn out in highlighter from Lucy and the little heart from Alex. She opens the bag up – maybe eating something will help – but her stomach flips just from looking at the food inside. She folds the note up carefully and leaves it inside the tent and stuffs the food in her backpack to eat later. She stands shakily, and wills her feet to start moving, beginning the long trudge to the nearest bathroom.

A shower will make her feel better.

…

The shower does not make her feel better.

Instead, she finds herself getting dizzy under the spray, and has to lean against the wall tiles to support herself as her vision blurs. The water burns as it runs over the cut on her arm, the skin around it inflamed and red, even more so than when she checked it last night. Nausea grows as she looks at it, and she barely wins the battle with her stomach as she steps out of the shower stall. She sits down on top of her towel on the bench and puts her head in her hands, trying not to pass out.

The water’s still running next to her, pushing out heat and steam, but Maggie starts shivering violently in the open air, naked and soaked.

She can’t deny it anymore. Something’s really wrong.

She doesn’t know how long it takes, but eventually, she’s able to wrap her towel around her shoulders. Then by some miracle, she’s able to stand, shut the water off, and get her clothes back on before shakily sitting down again.

She takes stock of her symptoms. She’s weak, queasy, her entire arm throbbing in pain, the skin around the wound hot to the touch. To top it all off, a splitting headache has started to pound in her skull, made worse by the way her teeth won’t stop chattering.

This isn’t good, she admits to herself. I need help.

She needs Lucy and Alex. She wants Lucy and Alex.

Getting to them in this state might prove to be a problem, though.

She stays in the bathroom for what feels like an eternity until she feels steady enough to walk. She doesn’t bother with brushing out her hair, doesn’t even try to wrap her arm back up with how much it hurts to move it. She just puts on the sweatshirt Alex gave her to try to fight off the chill she feels, grabs her bag, and starts heading towards the high school.

It’s slow going. She has to stop and rest multiple times along the way, feeling worse with every minute that passes.

At one point, she decides to try to eat something again, knowing she needs to and that it will give her some energy. But she only gets three bites into the apple Alex gave her before her stomach twists and she has to lunge for the nearest trashcan, thankful at least that nobody’s on the street to witness her right then.

She wipes her mouth with a groan and keeps moving before that changes.

Eventually, the familiar façade of the high school appears in front of her. She’s too out of it to even appreciate that she made it, heading to the parking lot and finding Lucy’s car on autopilot. She takes the spare key from where she knows Lucy keeps it in the gas tank and unlocks the doors, collapsing across the backseat, hardly aware of what she’s doing.

She has no plan, other than waiting until her friends are out of school, and this seems as good of a place as any.

She doesn’t even get a moment’s rest, though, and she barely gets the door back open in time for her to vomit onto the asphalt.

When it’s over, she crawls back into the car and drops, tears soaking her cheeks and vision swimming.

A delirious thought that she might be dying flits through her head, and she whimpers.

Alex and Lucy will be here soon, she tells herself. They’ll help.

It’s the last thought she has before everything goes black.

…

Chapter Text

May 29^th?

“God, Lucy, her arm, it’s– Can you go any faster?”

“I’m trying.”

“What happened to her arm, Alex?”

“I don’t know. Kara, just stay in your seat, okay? Lucy can’t drive with your head up like that.”

“Is she going to be okay?”

“I don’t know, just– Mom will help her. We just need to stay calm.”

Maggie groans when she registers the voices talking. Her head is on something soft. It’s the only part of her that feels nice.

Something brushes across her cheek. A hand. “Maggie? Hey, can you hear me?”

That’s Alex, and she sounds the complete opposite of ‘calm.’ Maggie wonders what’s going on. But she can’t answer.

“We’re getting help, okay? Lucy and Kara are here. Just hang on for a little bit longer.”

Her stomach lurches, bile rising in her throat.

Oh no.

Maggie wants to move, to get a sound out to warn them, but she’s disconnected from her body, nothing working right.

All she can do is lay helpless as she gets sick. Hope she’s not hitting Alex.

“Oh God.”

“Alex?!”

Maggie feels her upper body get propped up as Alex brushes hair out of her face. “It’s okay. It’s okay, Maggie. Get it all up; you’ll feel better. Try to relax.”

She tries to listen, to do what Alex says. She might be sick again; she’s not really sure. Her head spins.

She fades out again.

…

???

“Alex! I got Eliza!”

“Alex, what on earth is going on? Kara said that Maggie needs– oh. What happened?”

“We don’t know; we found her passed out like this after school. She’s sick – and look – I think it’s her arm, but I don’t know how she got hurt, I swear. Please, you have to help her.”

“I will. I have a stretcher coming. Lucy, can you open the door on the other side?”

“On it.”

“We couldn’t get her to wake up when we found her and we freaked out. She started mumbling on the way here and got sick, but she hasn’t responded to anything.”

“It sounds like it was pretty scary for you three, but you did the right thing. She’s going to be fine. I’ll make sure we take good care of her.”

“Mom, there’s something I gotta tell you–”

“Let’s get her inside first, okay, honey? And get you both cleaned up.”

…

“–and you didn’t think it would be smart to tell me?”

“She told us not to!”

“Why? Is she in some kind of trouble? What do you even know about this girl?”

“Enough! I know enough! Enough that when she asked me to help her, to not tell anyone about her, to believe her, I did. And I knew– I knew you would be mad at me, and th–that’s fine, but please, please don’t–”

“Alex, shh. I just need to know the full situation so I can do my job as a mother. I can’t just let her keep living like this. Shh, honey, shh. It’s going to be okay.”

“B-but–”

“Lucy, do you think you could take Kara down to the cafeteria, give us a moment alone?”

“Yeah, of course. C’mon, Kara. We’ll check on her later.”

“Okay.”

 “M–Mom, please, please don’t–”

“Alex, just take a deep breath. I want to help her just as much as you do. I know how much she means to you.”

“J-just please, please, don’t be mad. You haven’t – you haven’t seen how scared she is of anyone finding her. When she first got here, she was covered in bruises, and Kara told me two of her ribs were broken. And she was so scared. Scared and sad, but she’s been so much happier lately, but she still gets all panicky if we bring up getting her help or anything to do with her parents. She hasn’t talked about any of it, but Mom, I know– I know they hurt her. I know that’s what she’s running from. You have to believe me. I just wanted to help her.”

“I’m not mad. I’m not mad, sweetheart. I’m sorry if I came across as harsh. I’m just concerned. But I believe you. And I think I know what we can do to keep everyone else from trying to figure out who Maggie is, what we can do to help her.”

“What?”

“You remember your dad’s friend, the one who helped us out when we first got Kara? How he helped us officially adopt her, even though she didn’t have any birth record or any valid papers? I’m going to give him a call.”

“But do you think he’ll help her? She’s human. Doesn’t he only do that for aliens when they first come here?”

“I think I can convince him to make an exception.”

…

“Thank you for doing all this so quickly. I know you’ve been busy lately.”

“Your daughter called me right after you did. It sounded important.”

“Why does that not surprise me? You said you were able to find something?”

“I did. That gym shirt really helped narrow down the search. This is a missing juvenile report from the Blue Springs Sheriff’s Office in Nebraska. Margarita Rodas, missing since February. Runaway. Photo from the report is a pretty clear ID. Although she was smart, cutting her hair.”

“And Oscar Rodas is…?”

“Her father, the sheriff of the town, and the one who filed the report. That was enough reason for me to do some more digging. What I found was… not pretty, to put it mildly. Indicators of child abuse going back years. The school staff all have a theory of what they think Mr. Rodas really did to his daughter. A neighbor also remembered an ‘incident’ on Valentine’s Day, three days before this report was made. All in all, I’d say she did the right thing, getting out when she could. It was a very brave thing to do.”

“And no one’s going to question why a PI from California was looking into this, right? That man isn’t going to trace her back to here?”

“Don’t worry, Eliza. No one even remembers I was there. That case will most likely remain open indefinitely, and nothing on our end is going to put up any red flags in the system. After all… the girl we found isn’t Margarita Rodas.”

…

???

When Maggie wakes up – her mouth feeling like it had been stuffed with cotton and her throat like it had been rubbed raw with sandpaper, the rest of her body stiff and achy – the first thing she sees is Lucy.

Lucy, sitting in a chair, juggling a textbook and notebook in her lap, head bent over the page, scribbling away. Maggie’s in a bed, and there’s a vase of flowers on a table next to her, Streaky propped up beside it, as well Kara’s white dog that she can’t quite remember the name of at the moment.

Her head is fuzzy. She has a feeling that she’s woken up a few times before, but this is the first time she’s been lucid enough to open her eyes. She doesn’t remember much beyond passing out in the back of Lucy’s car.

Speaking of, Lucy hasn’t seemed to realize she’s awake yet, so Maggie opens her mouth.

“Wha’ happen?” she asks, her voice slurred and uncooperative. She tries to clear her throat and instantly regrets it at the pain she feels.

Lucy startles at the words – the notebook falling to the floor as she jolts– but she grins when she sees Maggie looking at her. “You’re awake!” she says, sliding the textbook to the floor too and leaning closer.

Maggie tries to ask her question again, but this time her voice is gone, and all that comes out is a pained croak. Lucy pulls a pitcher from the table and pours some water into a cup, putting a bendy straw in it before holding it out for Maggie.

“Here,” she says. “Drink a little. You’ve been asleep for a while.”

Maggie does, taking small sips that make her mouth taste better and make her feel more alert. She takes in the rest of the room they’re in and realizes exactly where she is.

The hospital.

She’s instantly on high-alert, and blood rushes to her head as she shoots up. She moans and clutches at her forehead, and Lucy steadies her as she wavers.

“Take it easy,” Lucy soothes. “You’re still pretty sick.”

But Maggie can’t take it easy. She’s relieved to see she isn’t handcuffed to the bed – meaning her father hasn’t found her yet – but if the hospital’s looked into who she is or starts asking questions now that she’s awake: it’s only a matter of time.

Which means she has to figure out how much they know, stat.

Dizziness forgotten, she looks Lucy in the eye, frantic. “Has anyone reported that they found me here? Do they know who I am?”

Lucy suddenly looks guilty, and Maggie’s heart sinks. “We had to tell Alex’s mom what we knew, and she called in a friend to look– what are you doing?”

Maggie’s swung her legs over the edge of the bed at the words, every fiber of her being screaming that she needs to run, needs to run now, before he finds her.

Lucy presses down on her shoulders, and it’s a testament to how weak she is that Maggie almost lets it stop her. “Maggie, listen, it’s okay, and as soon as Alex’s mom gets back from the cafeteria with Alex and Kara, she can probably explain it better, but she got a friend–”

“No,” Maggie says harshly, once again trying to stand, but this time she’s stopped by the realization that there’s an IV in her right arm, under the mound of bandages where her wound is.

She gives the tube a tug. No dice; it’s taped down good, and her fingers are too shaky to grasp the edge to rip it off.

She figures the line will only stretch so far before it un-attaches at one end or the other and puts her bare feet down on the floor, swatting Lucy’s hands away and bracing herself to stand.

Lucy’s grip gets tighter on her shoulder, but she’s being careful not to touch Maggie’s injured arm, which Maggie uses to her advantage. They go back and forth for a little bit, Maggie not making it much further than standing before she’s pushed back down on the bed by an increasingly frustrated Lucy.

“Maggie. Maggie – stop – come on, lay back down. Where do you even think you’re going? You’re sick. You’ve been – would you just listen to me – you’ve been out of it for two days; you still have a fever. Lay back down.”

“I can’t,” Maggie pants, fighting against Lucy’s hold with the little strength she has. “I can’t go back. They’re just going to send me back. Let me go. Please, let me go!”

She may be getting hysterical at this point, but she can’t bring herself to care.

“Maggie, stop!” Lucy’s tone is a little frantic now too, as Maggie manages to push out of her grasp and away from the bed.

Her legs are too weak to hold herself up though, and she collapses onto her hands and knees before Lucy can catch her. There’s a sharp pain from the crook of her elbow as the IV gets ripped out with the motion, and her knees ache with the impact of the hard floor. The stupid hospital gown she’s just realized she’s wearing doesn’t do her any favors either.

Lucy’s hands are on her again, trying to help her up. “Help me! She just woke up and she’s freaking out,” she says, and Maggie’s confused enough by the pain and Lucy talking to her in the third person that she goes still.

“Wha–”

And then shoes fill her vision, shoes that don’t belong to Lucy, and more hands are on her and they’re lifting her up and Maggie is fighting again, thrashing as they place her back on the bed, more out of sheer panic than anything else now.

“Maggie. Maggie, look at me.” Two hands cup her cheeks and she meets the eyes of a blonde woman who looks vaguely familiar. “You’re safe. You’re safe here. Just take a deep breath, sweetie.”

With that, she notices that she’s choking, choking on air that won’t properly go down her sore throat, but the realization only makes it worse.

“He’s going to find me,” she sobs out. “Please, don’t let him find me. Please don’t let him take me back. I can’t go back–”

She’s quickly losing herself.

“I might need to sedate her. Here, Alex, step back for a second.”

“Wait, hold on, let me try something.”

Maggie’s made aware of Alex’s presence in the room when she speaks, and then Alex is sitting on the bed and pulling Maggie into her arms, placing a hand firmly on her chest. “Remember how we did this last time, Maggie? Breathe with me.” She inhales exaggeratedly, her words cutting through Maggie’s panic.

The corners of her vision are darkening, but she manages to take a stuttering, gasping breath as she clutches on to Alex’s hand. Several more and she can see Lucy leaning against the window, with her arms around a worried-looking Kara.

The blonde woman steals her focus again as she places an unused syringe onto a rolling tray and pushes it off to the side before stepping over to Maggie. She gently takes Maggie’s wrist and checks her pulse, then shoulders the stethoscope around her neck and places it into her ears with one hand. She presses the cold disc at the other end against Maggie’s chest, listening.

“That’s it, Maggie,” she encourages. “You’re doing great, sweetheart. You’re safe here with us. And we’ll help explain everything that’s happened since the girls brought you in as soon as you’re ready.”

“Yeah, look,” Alex adds, drawing her attention to something on Maggie’s wrist, “Mom found a way to help you, if you want. See?”

Alex is twisting the plastic bracelet Maggie must have been given when she was admitted around, pointing out the words scribbled on one side. Maggie focuses on them, and her confusion only really grows, but the bands constricting her chest finally loosen as she takes them in.

Sawyer, Maggie

“See, Maggie? It’s okay. You’re safe. No one’s going to find you.”

With that, she sags into Alex, her energy completely spent. “What does this mean?” she asks, fingering the bracelet.

The blonde woman wipes off Maggie’s wet cheeks with some tissues as she answers. “I have a friend, a private investigator, who also helps people get valid IDs and any papers they might need to establish an identity with the government. When Alex explained your situation, I called him. We can discuss the future implications once you’re feeling better, but for now, I can assure you that no one’s going to find anything on you even if they were to look up our hospital records. No one here knows who you really are.”

She looks up at the woman, meets her eye. “But you do?”

“We’ll talk about it later,” the woman reassures her, giving her daughters and Lucy a side-eye glance.

It’s enough to placate Maggie for now. “You’re Alex and Kara’s mom?”

“That’s me.” She smiles warmly. “Dr. Danvers to everyone here, but you can just call me Eliza if you like.”

It’s said in a way that’s meant to be reassuring, but of course, of course, she just had to share a name with the person who forced her into this mess in the first place. Maggie chuckles tiredly at the irony of it all.

“–heard a lot about you from my girls,” Dr. Danvers is saying. “It’s nice to finally meet you. Although I do wish the circumstances were better for you. How are you feeling now?”

“Bad,” Maggie admits. “But just like I’m sick. My arm,” she flips it over to inspect the offending limb more closely, “doesn’t hurt like before.”

“I’ve put you on some strong antibiotics. It’s good to hear they’re working. Speaking of, let’s get you set back up again, shall we?”

The next few minutes are spent getting Maggie propped back up in bed as Dr. Danvers peels the bandages off her arm. Maggie’s relieved to see how much better her wound looks already, with a few neat stitches and most of the angry red coloring gone.

Alex gets off the bed to give her mom room to work but stays close, as Maggie doesn’t let go of her hand the entire time. Or maybe it’s Alex that doesn’t let go. Either way, Maggie’s thankful for the contact.

After reinserting the IV and applying a fresh bandage, Dr. Danvers checks a few things off on a chart hanging over the bed.

“Well, all things considered, I’d say you’re doing pretty well. Your stats are looking much better. If this keeps up, we may even be able to see about getting you out of here as soon as tomorrow. But for now, you should get some more rest. Build your strength back up. Do you need anything? Something to eat or drink?”

Maggie’s nose scrunches up involuntarily at the thought of food. “I’m okay. I had some water before. I’m just tired.”

The pager Dr. Danvers is wearing on her hip gives out a beep and she checks the clock in the room. “That’s the end of my shift for today. Girls, it’s time to start heading home. You can come back to visit tomorrow after school.”

“Wait,” Alex says. “Can we stay and talk to Maggie for a little more? Please.”

Alex and Lucy both shoot Dr. Danvers puppy-dog eyes, pleading.

Dr. Danvers sighs, but she’s smiling. “All right. I’ll take Kara with me and get my stuff from my office. But you two better let Maggie sleep if she’s getting too tired.”

“Promise!” Alex and Lucy chirp at the same time.

“I’ll be back in the morning to check on you,” she tells Maggie. “If you need anything in the meantime, just ask one of the nurses. I put you in a private room, so no one else should bother you tonight.”

Kara pulls away from Lucy then and leans over the bed to give Maggie a gentle hug. “I’m so glad you’re okay, Maggie. Feel better.”

“Thanks. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Yes!” Kara nods eagerly. “And I’m leaving Krypto in charge of watching over you while I’m gone.”

Maggie chuckles. “I appreciate that.”

With that, Dr. Danvers leads Kara out of the room, closing the door to give them some privacy.

As soon as they’re gone, Lucy rushes over, and half-climbs on top of Maggie on the bed to pull her into a hug. “Thank God, Maggie. You scared me so much!”

“’M sorry,” Maggie mumbles around Lucy’s shoulder, moving her injured arm out of the way when Lucy drops over onto that side.

“No, it’s okay, it was kind of my fault. I’m just glad you’re okay–”

Alex sits on the bed too and lightly whacks Lucy on the shoulder with the back of her hand. “Are you forgetting that we have a bone to pick with her?”

She turns to Maggie then, a grumpy frown on her face, and pokes her in the forehead with one finger. “You. Why didn’t you tell me you were hurt? What the hell happened anyway? And don’t say it was nothing. I should have known something was wrong with how off you seemed at the beach, but you lied to me. Why?”

Maggie squirms a little, but she can tell Alex isn’t really angry, just concerned. “I didn’t think it was that bad. I thought I’d be fine. I didn’t want you to get mad.”

Lucy tilts her head curiously. “Why would we get mad at you for that?”              

“Not me,” Maggie licks her lips. “At– at Logan.”

“Logan did this to you?!”

It’s a half-shout and Lucy sits up, her expression stony and jaw hard.

Maggie rushes to explain.

“I don’t think he meant– it was an accident really. He– after the party, I was walking downtown and he cornered me and he was drunk and I, I got scared. I pushed him away, but he– he had a broken bottle in his hand, and it cut me when he fell back.”

She says it all in one breath, sucking in air after getting it all out. Alex and Lucy give each other a look, probably sensing that there’s more to the story, but they both stay quiet for a beat. Alex gives her hand a squeeze instead.

“Look, can we talk about this later, please?” Maggie begs, feeling the lingering anxiety from earlier creeping back into her already-upset stomach. “This has all been a lot and I still don’t, I don’t feel that great.”

Lucy’s expression softens immediately, and she moves some hair off of Maggie’s sweaty forehead.

Alex puts up a hand playfully. “You’re not going to puke on me again, are you?”

It’s clearly said as a joke, but Maggie’s eyes go wide. “Did I?”

“Eh, a little.” Alex shrugs. “Don’t worry about it. It was mostly on yourself.”

“And my car,” Lucy interjects from where she’s once again snuggling into Maggie’s side. “It’s okay, though. I forgive you. You’re too hot to stay mad at.”

Alex flicks her in the back of the head. “Lucy! Really? Now?”

“What? She is; she’s still got a fever.”

“But that’s not what you meant, and we all know it.”

Lucy just smirks in response, Alex rolls her eyes, and Maggie laughs. And just like that, all the remaining tension vanishes between them.

Maggie’s still not sure what will happen to her come tomorrow, but for now, it’s enough.

Her eyes start to close once again as her aching body catches up with her.

“Are you guys allowed to be on the bed with me?” she asks softly.

“Even if we’re not,” Lucy whispers, her arm slung across Maggie’s stomach. “I’m not moving until they make me.”

“Can you stay with me until I fall asleep?”

Alex smiles at her. “We’re not going anywhere.”

And they don’t.

…

Chapter Text

June 1^st

Maggie wakes up the next morning feeling a lot better, all things considered. She’s even awake before a nurse comes to check on her, and has breakfast brought to her, although she doesn’t manage to eat much of it. Her appetite has yet to return, she’s quick to realize.

Dr. Danvers – Maggie still can’t think of her as Eliza – walks in her room a few minutes after her tray gets cleared away and smiles when she sees her awake.

“Good morning, Maggie. How are you feeling today?”

“Better, thank you.”

Eliza looks over the chart the nurse had filled out earlier as she sits down on the rolling stool. “Well, I have some good news for you. Your vitals are looking good, and your arm is healing well. You still have a bit of a fever, but that’s to be expected. You’ll have to stay on antibiotics for the next two weeks, but as long as everything holds up for the day and you feel up to it, we should be able to get you out of here by tonight.”

Maggie can see why normally that would be considered good news, but there’s a glaringly-obvious hole in that plan for her. “Where will I go?” she asks.

Dr. Danvers smiles kindly at her. “That’s what I’m here to discuss with you. But first, are you feeling up to having a visitor? There’s somebody who would like to meet you.”

Seeing Maggie’s look of confusion, she clarifies, “My friend I told you about yesterday. I think he can help explain a few things for you.”

“Oh,” Maggie says. “Um, sure.”

“Perfect.” Dr. Danvers stands back up. “He’s waiting in my office; I’ll be right back.”

Maggie’s mind spins as she waits. She wonders if she should be nervous, wonders how much this man could have possibly found out about her in such a short amount of time, wonders how much of it he’s shared with Dr. Danvers.

Deep-down, she already knows the answer, could see it in the pity reflected in the older woman’s eyes when Maggie had questioned her yesterday. It was the same look she’s received from countless adults in her life, at least the ones who happened to know anything about her home life.

She never wanted their pity, but there’s a little voice in the back of her head telling her to give Dr. Danvers and this friend of hers a chance this time. Not like she has much of a choice at this point, but still.

The woman in question returns a few minutes later, followed by a large man in a simple long sleeve shirt and jeans.

Maggie’s a little intimidated by his size, if she’s being honest, but then she meets his gaze, and feels herself relax. His eyes are kind, and somehow she can just… tell. He means her no harm.

“It’s nice to meet you, Maggie,” he says, holding out a hand for her to shake. “My name is John. I’m a friend of the Danvers. I figured you might have some questions for me.”

He sits in the chair by her bed and places the briefcase he’s carrying on the floor while Dr. Danvers perches back on the stool.

Maggie wastes no time in jumping right in.

“What does this mean for me?” she asks, pointing at her bracelet, referring to the surname scribbled on it.

“It can mean whatever you want it to,” John tells her. “It can just be a temporary arrangement, just something for the hospital records. But it could also be an opportunity to start fresh with a new name, if that’s something you would like to do.”

“How?” Maggie’s voice sounds incredibly small to her ears as she asks the question she’s been dreading. “The foster system?”

Dr. Danvers scoots a little closer on her stool. “Well, that’s what I would like to talk to you about, Maggie. When Kara first came to us, my husband and I had to register as foster parents before we could officially adopt her, and I’ve kept up the registration. I’ve already talked with Kara and Alex, so if it’s something you agree with, you would be more than welcome to stay with us. Officially, that is,” she adds with a chuckle.

Maggie feels her brain record-scratch. “You would do that? For me?”

“I admit that it would have to be only temporary. Two girls are sometimes all I can just about handle as a single parent. But I can promise you a home while we look for a more permanent solution, and also that you would be involved completely with any decision in that regard,” she says, placing a hand on Maggie’s shoulder. “You deserve a home, Maggie. A real home.”

Tears spring to Maggie’s eyes, and she looks down at her lap, staring fixedly at the scratchy hospital blanket. “I didn’t know who I could trust. I got as far away as I could, but I knew if the cops or child services caught me, that it would only be a matter of time before they found out who I was. And then I met Alex, and Lucy, and they promised not to tell…” She shrugs. “And I just kept getting away with it. And it’s been so nice here. I don’t want to leave. My dad…” she trails off.

“I thought he was going to kill me,” she admits for the first time, voice pitching upwards as she chokes over a sob. “That’s why I ran. That’s why I don’t want him to find me.”

A hand comes to rest on top of her own, its weight comforting as she struggles to compose herself. She looks up and meets John’s gaze, seeing a fierce protectiveness in his eyes.

“Eliza and I aren’t going to let that happen. You have my word. You’re safe now, and that’s all that matters. You did the right thing, Maggie.”

A wave of relief floods through her at his words, and Maggie feels herself calm, feels the weight that’s been pressing down on her ever since she ran away suddenly lift off her shoulders.

She sniffles and accepts the tissue Dr. Danvers hands her with a quiet thanks. “I didn’t tell Alex and Lucy about any of it,” she tells her. “Do they–”

Dr. Danvers shakes her head and trails her hand through Maggie’s hair. “I didn’t tell them anything they didn’t already know. It’s why I wanted to wait so we could have this discussion in private. It’s your choice if you want to share with them or not.”

Maggie slumps a little further down on the bed. “Thank you.”

“Of course, sweetie. Now, I think we’ve worn you out enough already,” she says, with a gentle hand on Maggie’s forehead. “Are you still feeling okay?”

Maggie nods. “Yeah. I feel a lot better now.”

Before Dr. Danvers can respond, her pager goes off, and she checks it with a sigh. “Duty calls, I’m afraid. I’ll be back to check on you around lunchtime, okay?” she tells Maggie.

At her nod, she turns to John. “We’ll have to have dinner together sometime soon. Have a chance to catch up properly.”

He nods. “I agree. But don’t worry, I’m planning to stick around for the time being.”

Dr. Danvers smiles. “I’m glad to hear it. And I know there’s someone else that will be glad to hear it too,” she says with a not-so-subtle raise of her eyebrows. “Have you–”

Her pager beeps again, cutting off whatever she had been about to ask. “I’m coming, I’m coming,” she mutters under her breath, before answering the call. With that, she gives them both a wave goodbye and heads out the door.

John clears his throat as a beat of silence fills the space.

“I hope it’s okay,” he says, nodding to where Maggie’s started fiddling with the bracelet again. “Sawyer,” he clarifies when he sees her confusion. “I tried to pick something that sounded good, but I’ll admit I usually don’t choose the names myself.”

 “I like it,” Maggie says, surprising herself when she realizes it’s true. “Maggie Sawyer. It’s–”

“Margarita Rodas, you will look at me when I’m talking to you!”

“Whatcha gonna do about it, Rodas? Have your daddy come hit me? Oh wait, he saves that for you, doesn’t he?”

“I swear, he’s a good man, Margarita. He was never like this before you were born. But he loves you, I promise.”

“–I like it,” she repeats, voice cracking. “Thank you.”

John seems to sense her sudden inner turmoil and stands. “I’ll let you get some rest, but before I go,” he says gently, taking out a folder stuffed with papers from his case. He places it on the tray table.

“This is everything I found during my investigation, including the report your father filed after you went missing. I can leave it here to look over if you’d like.”

Maggie blinks at the file, conflicting feelings swirling in her gut. Does she want to know her father’s official version of the story?

Does it matter?

It’s a minute before she speaks, but her voice is clear.

“I think… I think it’s okay. I’m good.”

John looks her in the eyes for a moment before he smiles, taking the folder back and tucking it away.

“It was a pleasure to meet someone as brave as you, Maggie. I’m looking forward to seeing more of you in the future. And if you ever need anything, you can always call me.”

And with a final tilt of his head, he’s gone, leaving one word echoing in Maggie’s head.

Brave.

…

“Maggie!”

Maggie doesn’t even get a chance to look up from her book – Lucy had left her the copy about the woman knight again, and after waking up from a nap, she was about halfway through re-reading it – before a blonde blur is tackling her on the bed.

“Oof,” she wheezes as a bony elbow collides with her stomach. “Hi, Kara.”

“Sorry, I’m sorry! It’s just I heard you were awake, and I got excited. Are you feeling better? I hope you’re feeling better. Eliza says you’re going to stay with us for a while when you’re feeling better. Won’t that be fun? That way Alex won’t be the only one who gets to see you in the morning! And you won’t have to sleep outside anymore!”

“Wait.” Maggie blinks. “You knew about that?”

Kara gives her a sheepish grin. “Well, Alex and Lucy and Eliza have been talking about it a lot since we brought you here.”

“Oh. Right.”

Kara looks down at her hands and taps her fingertips together. “But I might have known before that, but I knew you wanted to keep it a secret and I couldn’t exactly tell you how I knew, but I know you know about me now, even though we haven’t really had a chance to talk about it, and I–”

“Kara.” Maggie interrupts her nervous rambling. “If you’re talking about, you know–” she motions at her eyes, mindful of the door Kara had left open and the people passing through the hallway. “It’s okay; I promise your secret is safe with me.”

“I know it is,” Kara says matter-of-factly, and Maggie sees nothing but trust in her eyes. “And I’m glad you know, even if that totally wasn’t the way I wanted to tell you.”

Before Maggie gets a chance to ask just exactly how Kara was planning on telling her she’s an alien with superpowers, Kara sits up suddenly.

“Uh oh,” she mutters, just in time for Alex to barge into the room.

“Kara! You can’t just go running off like that when we’re in public!”

Kara pouts. “But… Maggie,” she says and gestures between them, as if that explains everything.

Alex’s jaw opens, then closes, like she can’t think of anything to contend that with.

“Nobody saw me,” Kara adds. “At most, they felt a slight breeze.”

Alex pinches the bridge of her nose and lets out a sigh. “More like a whirlwind,” she mutters, before letting it go and turning to Maggie. Her face instantly brightens. “Hey, you look a lot better. How are you?”

“It’s been a long day, but I’m okay. Lucy coming too?”

“She dropped us off. Said she needed to stop at home first,” Alex explains, pulling a chair closer to the bed before sitting down. She places her backpack on her lap and starts pulling items out. “Let’s see. Clothes for you to change into. All clean.” She throws a bundle of Maggie’s clothes onto her lap. “Snack for Kara so she doesn’t starve before dinner.” A granola bar gets tossed in Kara’s direction. “And cards to help us pass the time because I’m already getting sick of the TV channels they have here,” she finishes, breaking open a pack of playing cards and shuffling them in her hands. “Who wants to deal?”

About an hour later, they’re in the middle of a heated game of Slapjack when Lucy walks in.

“Good news!” she announces dramatically, then plops down in the middle of their game to hug Maggie. “Hi, Maggie.”

Maggie sinks into the contact with a happy sigh. “Hi.”

Kara holds out her arms for a hug too, dropping all the cards she had in her hand in the process.

A grumpy frown works its way on to Alex’s face. “Aww, come on, I was just about to win.”

Kara sticks her tongue out at her sister. “Sure, you were.”

Maggie looks at Lucy as she settles on the edge on the bed. “What’s the good news?” she asks, steering them back on track before the sibling squabbling can really start.

Lucy grins, looking smug and all-too proud of herself. “Logan’s not going to be a problem for us anymore.”

Alex’s head whips around. “What? What did you do?”

Lucy shrugs. “Well, I admit, I was tempted to personally make sure his nose had a matching dent in the other direction after what he did…” she says, giving a sideways glance to Maggie. “But in the end, I went with a more roundabout approach.”

Maggie can tell Lucy’s in a triumphant mood and ready to drag out the suspense for as long as possible, but Alex clearly doesn’t have the patience for that. She swats Lucy’s shoulder. “Just spit it out.”

Lucy holds up a hand. “Okay, okay. I told my dad what he did. We just went over and had a nice chat with Logan and his parents. Let’s just say, my dad made it very clear that if he comes near one of us again, or says anything else about us, that there will be consequences. And that he can personally recommend a good military school or two if Logan needs any more help ‘getting his act together,’” she finger-quotes.

Alex looks ecstatic at the news. “Oh my God, no way. Why didn’t you tell me? I would have paid to see that.”

“And you think he’ll just leave us alone now?” Maggie asks, not being able to stop the doubt from creeping in. Call her a cynic, but hey.

“Oh yeah,” Lucy says, resolute. “He was always scared of my dad. You should have seen the look on his face when he brought up the school thing. And he admitted that he remembered hurting you last week and I told them you were in the hospital because of it. His parents were livid. I’d be surprised if they even let him out of the house for the rest of the year.”

“Thanks,” Maggie tells her softly, reaching out to put her hand on Lucy’s shoulder. “I know confronting him couldn’t have been easy on you.”

“Anything for you.” Lucy smiles at her before looking over to Alex. Sadness creeps up in her eyes, along with a dash of guilt. “I should have done it a lot sooner, if I’m being honest.”

Alex seems to know what Lucy’s thinking and shakes her head, reaching out for Lucy’s hand. “No, hey. What he did was never your fault. And I’m not the only one he outed to the entire school. You always seem to forget that part.”

“Yes, but–”

“No buts,” Alex says, pulling Lucy into a hug. “I have you guys, and we’re all okay, and that’s all that matters.”

Maggie joins the hug too when Lucy sniffles quietly.

“You guys have me too!” Kara says, speaking up for the first time in a while.

Lucy chuckles and leans back a little to wipe her eyes. “Yeah, we do. Get in here, squirt.”

Kara complies, but when they all finally pull back she squints at Lucy. “You’re not allowed to call me that when I grow taller than you.”

Lucy challenges her with a raised eyebrow. “Oh yeah? What makes you think you’re going to be taller than me?”

“Easy. I haven’t had my growth spurt yet, whereas yours is probably nearly over, statistically speaking. And you’re still tiny.”

Alex snorts with a laugh and just shrugs at the glare she receives in response. “She kind of has a point there.”

Lucy looks scandalized. “I’m taller than Maggie!”

“And? That doesn’t really help you; Maggie’s tiny too.”

“Hey!”

“Whatever,” Lucy huffs and suddenly springs out to trap Kara in a noogie. “You’ll always be a little squirt to me!”

Kara squeals with laughter and tries to fend Lucy off by scooping up some playing cards from the bed and flicking them at her.

Lucy retaliates, and before they all know it, it’s devolved into an all-out card war when Alex grabs the majority of the deck and crouches behind the chair to fling them at the rest of them. Kara and Lucy throw back all the ammo they can reach, and Maggie joins in, pelting the three of them with own hand of cards. She tries to use her pillow as a shield but she’s laughing so much that she can hardly keep it in front of her face.

“Do I want to know what’s going on in here?”

They all freeze in unison and turn to see Dr. Danvers standing in the doorway, smiling slightly as she takes in the mess they’ve made of the room.

Alex straightens and clears her throat, but her attempt to appear composed is mitigated by the Ace of Hearts falling from her hair. “Kara started it.”

Kara sticks her tongue out at her.

Their mom doesn’t look mad though. “I think you guys have been cooped up in here a little too long,” she says. “Ready to go home?”

“Yes!” Kara jumps up with both arms raised high. “Are we going to have a special dinner for Maggie?”

Dr. Danvers ruffles Kara’s hair. “How about we get some takeout on the way home and rent a movie? Nothing too crazy; Maggie’s still sick, remember. Lucy, would you like to join us?”

 “If you don’t mind?”

“The more the merrier. Honestly, it might be good to have a buffer.” Dr. Danvers motions to her daughters. “Wouldn’t want these two to scare Maggie off with their bickering too quickly.”

“Hey,” Kara and Alex say at the same time, causing Maggie to chuckle.

They get the cards cleaned up – although no one lets Maggie help, and Dr. Danvers fusses with checking her vitals one last time in what Maggie is pretty sure is just an attempt to keep her from getting up – and soon enough they’re walking down the hall to the elevators, and then Maggie’s stepping outside for the first time in days.

A rush of nerves floods her stomach as they make their way to the parking lot, but then Alex is tugging on her hand to lead her over to her mom’s car, and Maggie knows she’s safe.  

She’s going to be okay.

Lucy follows them in her car, and they stop to pick up the promised takeout and a movie along the way.

They make it to the Danvers home, Kara chattering almost non-stop the whole way with how excited she is to have Maggie staying with them. She only stops once she gets dinner placed in front of her, and even then, Dr. Danvers has to remind her twice that it’s not polite to talk with her mouth full.

(Unlike the bottomless pit that is Kara, Maggie only manages to eat about half of the soup they got for her, but Dr. Danvers seems happy with it, and she assures Maggie that her appetite will improve over the next few days.)

They all file into the living room as soon as dinner’s over to watch the movie. Dr. Danvers curls up in an armchair and Kara sprawls out on the carpet, leaving Alex, Lucy, and Maggie the couch to themselves.

Lucy snuggles up to Maggie, claiming everyone needs cuddles when they’re sick, and even Alex sits close on her other side, one hand loosely clasping Maggie’s.

Maggie panics for a moment, wondering if they’re allowed to be close like this while Alex’s mom is there, but before she can worry too much about it, the older woman catches her eye. She just smiles and goes back to watching the movie, and Maggie relaxes.

And maybe she relaxes a little too much because she finds herself drifting sideways, encouraged by Lucy’s arm pressing down on her shoulder. She’d taken a nap after the talk with John that morning, but the trip from the hospital and the still-lingering fever are taking it out of her. Before she knows it, her head’s lying on top of Lucy’s lap and her feet are tucked up against Alex’s thigh.

She’s lulled even further when Lucy’s fingers start running through her hair, and her eyelids get increasingly heavy before they shut completely.

She’s woken sometime later by Dr. Danvers’ voice. “Lucy, sweetie. Your father called. It’s time to head home. I can give you a ride if you’re too tired.”

Her head bobs as Lucy shifts with a groan. “It’s okay; I’m up.”

 Lucy must have fallen asleep at some point too and now she needs to go; the rational part of Maggie’s brain tells her. The part that’s sick and entirely too comfortable right now reaches out and weakly grips one of Lucy’s knees.

“No,” she whines.

Lucy chuckles softly. “Sorry, Sunshine. I can come back and be your pillow again tomorrow.”

Maggie pouts tiredly, but lifts her head enough to allow Lucy to get up. Lucy fills the spot she’s just vacated with one of the couch pillows, and leans over.

“There you go,” she whispers, and kisses Maggie’s cheek. “Sweet dreams, Maggie.”

…

Chapter Text

Alex helps her up to the guest room they set up for her after Lucy leaves. Her backpack’s waiting for her there, which Maggie is relieved to see, as she had been feeling a little anxious without it. She opens up the front zip pouch and sees her broken watch tucked inside and smiles.

Alex makes sure she’s settled and comfortable for the night before heading to her own room, and pretty soon, the noise in the house comes to an end as the others do the same. Then it’s quiet, and the only things Maggie can hear are the hum of the fan and the ticking of the clock on the wall.

She closes her eyes, grateful to be in bed once again because, despite the naps she had taken that day, she’s still exhausted.

But she can’t seem to fall asleep.

She tosses and turns for a while, but the mattress is much softer than any one she’s ever gotten to sleep on. Which probably should make this a wonderful experience, but after months of sleeping on the ground, Maggie’s not used to having a real bed.

She rolls over so she can see the red glow of the alarm clock on the nightstand. 12:23.

She sighs, frustrated with herself. I’m so tired. Please just sleep.

She turns onto her other side again. She’d been able to earlier when she was on the couch, so why couldn’t she just–

Ah. The couch sounds really good. Maybe I should just–

But no. What if she wakes someone up by trying to go downstairs? Or what if they find her on the couch in the morning and think she’s being ungrateful for not staying in the room they gave her?

What if what if what if –

By 1:13, she gives up, pushing upright and placing both feet on the floor. She wraps a blanket around her shoulders as she treads out to the hallway.

She moves down the stairs as carefully as she can, trying desperately not to wake anyone else, and into the kitchen, looking into a few of the cabinets before she finds a glass. She fills it up using the water dispenser on the door of the fridge and nearly jumps out of her skin when a whisper comes from behind her.

“Can’t sleep?”

She turns and sees Kara standing in the doorway, muffling a yawn behind the sleeve of her star-patterned pajamas.

A little bit of water splashes on her foot, and Maggie quickly pulls the glass away from the dispenser before it can overflow. “No, sorry,” she whispers, feeling guilty. “Did I wake you?”

Kara shakes her head. “Bad dream,” she explains, pulling open the pantry and jumping up to snag a package of cookies from an upper shelf. “But when I went to check on you, I heard you were awake, and then I heard you come down here.” She shoves a whole cookie into her mouth, offering the packet up to Maggie. “Wan’ one?”

Maggie takes one, but the blanket slips from her shoulders with her hands full with the glass and cookie. Kara stuffs another cookie in her mouth and picks it up for her.

“I was going to try sleeping on the couch again,” Maggie explains, feeling a little embarrassed. “I don’t think I’m really used to sleeping in a real bed anymore.”

Kara throws the blanket over her shoulder and grabs Maggie’s arm. “C’mon then,” she says, pulling them towards the living room.

Kara has Maggie curl up on one end of the couch before draping the blanket over her and handing her another cookie. Then she sits down on the other end, resting the tray on the space between them.

“You want to know where I slept for two months after I first got here?” Kara whispers into the dark, kicking her feet out in the air in front of her.

“Sure.”

“On the floor. Under my bed. I came to Earth in this little pod. Really only big enough for one person.” Kara illustrates the size with her hands. “I was asleep for most of the trip, but it was long enough that I got used to it. And then when I got here, I just couldn’t sleep without something over my head. I didn’t tell anyone, but then my powers started to come in and I woke up one morning floating in the air, with my bed on top of me.” Kara chuckles quietly. “That’s how I learned I could fly. I totally freaked out and threw the bed off me. Broke the entire thing into pieces, and put a hole in the floor. If you look under the carpet in my room, you can see the patch job Eliza and Jeremiah did to fix it.”

Maggie laughs with her. “Oh wow.”

“Yeah. So what I’m really trying to say is no one’s going to care if you want to sleep down here instead, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“Thanks.”

“Mm-hmm!”

Kara immediately goes back to stuffing her face with cookies, and they sit in content silence for a few minutes. Maggie finally starts to feel sleep creeping up on her.

“What did you mean earlier? At the hospital? When you said you knew about me sleeping outside before Alex told you?”

“Oh,” Kara says, spewing crumbs down her shirt. She waits until her mouth is clear to answer. “I kind of overheard you and Alex talking about it that first night. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but well, super-hearing,” she explains, pointing at her ear. “I still can’t really control it sometimes. But I’m getting better! I’ve practiced every night since then! I made sure to listen for your heartbeat every night, just long enough to know you were safe out there.”

Kara suddenly sits up with wide eyes, as if just realizing what she’s admitted. “Sorry, is that weird? I didn’t mean for it to be weird.”

Maggie shakes her head, touched by the gesture. “No, that actually makes me feel really good, knowing someone cared enough to check up on me every night.”

Kara sinks back into the couch with relief. She smiles. “Well, of course, we all care about you, Maggie.”

Maggie swallows around the sudden lump in her throat. “Thanks.”

They’re quiet after that and when Maggie glances over a few minutes later, she sees Kara’s fallen asleep with her hand still inside the package of cookies. Maggie closes her eyes with a smile and follows suit not too long after.

…

June 2^nd

Her first official day staying with the Danvers is pretty relaxed.

She wakes up to find all three of the Danvers in the kitchen making breakfast and she’s greeted with three smiles when they see she’s awake. No one brings up the whole couch thing; Dr. Danvers just asks her kindly if she slept well.

She’s declared fever-free and even finds she has most of her appetite back once they sit down to eat. Kara declares that they celebrate with extra whip cream on all of their pancakes, and although Dr. Danvers rolls her eyes and reminds her that she knows who ate all the cookies in the middle of the night, she lets Kara use up the whole can.

After breakfast, Maggie helps Alex and her mom go down to the beach to clear out her cave. Dr. Danvers apparently hadn’t seen it up until that point, and her eyes get a little teary as she takes it all in. Maggie feels shame creep up on her and she moves to defend her little make-shift home.

“It really wasn’t that bad. It was just what I needed,” she tries to explain. Dr. Danvers just pulls her into a hug without saying a word, smoothing a hand down Maggie’s hair. “I don’t regret any of it,” Maggie continues with conviction.

“I know you don’t, sweetheart,” Dr. Danvers says, rocking them both a little. “I know you don’t.”

They get the tent dismantled, and Alex and Maggie work on shaking the fabric out while Dr. Danvers takes everything else inside. They fold the fabric and the poles up as best they can and pack it all up in the sleeve it came in so they can give it back to Lucy later.

John pays them a visit after lunch, and he’s fully tackled by an over-eager Kara in the doorway. Maggie winces a little, especially now that she knows how strong Kara really is. From the sound of the impact, it doesn’t seem like Kara tried to hold anything back. But John doesn’t seem in the least bit phased.

There’s some paperwork he has to go over with Dr. Danvers and a couple of forms that Maggie needs to sign. She has to redo the first one after she catches herself signing it Maggie R- but after that, she gets the hang of it.

It isn’t really until he’s passed over a birth certificate and a social security card both bearing the name Maggie Sawyer that she realizes that this is real. A lot of the conversation had gone over her head up until that point, but it hits her then.

And she understands enough to know that whatever John did to get these, it was definitely illegal.

That makes her worried for this stranger who really had no reason to help her, but did so despite it all.

“You’re not going to get in trouble for this, are you?” she asks him.

“Don’t worry, Maggie. I’ve been doing this for a long time.”

“Yeah, but not for humans, right? Not for someone who already has an identity like me?”

There’s a beat of silence, and Maggie starts to panic that she’s said the wrong thing. Both of the adults seem a little taken aback by the question, but then John just throws his head back and laughs.

“I knew you were a perceptive one. I suppose I owe you the truth, seeing as you’re one of my clients and all.”

His eyes suddenly flash red, fading back to normal so quickly that Maggie wonders if she’s seeing things.

“My real name is J’onn J’onzz. I am a private investigator, but I also help aliens out who have come to this planet to start a new life. It isn’t always easy. Some of us have a lot harder time blending in than Kara and I have. Doing this for you was simple compared to a lot of my cases.”

Kara, who had kept quiet up until that point, throws her arms up into the air. “Oh, oh! Show Maggie how you can shapeshift! Do me! Do me!”

John – J’onn – sighs good-humoredly. “I was trying not to scare her off, Kara.”

“It’s not scary!” Kara insists. “It’s awesome! Please?”

“You can shapeshift?” Maggie asks incredulously.

J’onn laughs, and then suddenly, there’re two Karas sitting at the table.

“I am a Green Martian,” J’onn-Kara tells her. “I’m also telepathic.”

“Whoa.”

Real-Kara squeals with delight. “It’s me!”

They get a little off-topic after that, but after all the excitement dies down, and Maggie thanks J’onn for the thousandth time, he leaves with the promise to Eliza of staying for dinner sometime during the upcoming week.

Lucy comes over shortly after that, and although they start off playing video games in the living room, everyone seems to be feeling a little restless after spending so much time indoors the past week.

Alex puts her controller down with a sigh, after losing the game for the fifth time. “You guys want to take a walk?”

They pass by Dr. Danvers in the kitchen on their way out. “Mom, we’re going down to the beach,” Alex tells her.

Dr. Danvers looks up as she finishes sliding a pan into the oven. “Okay, just don’t go too far. Take it easy on Maggie. Lucy, are you staying for dinner?”

“If that’s okay? My dad won’t be home until late tonight.”

“Of course. I’ll call you three when it’s ready.”

“Thanks!” Alex calls out, already halfway out the mudroom, pulling Maggie and Lucy by a hand each as they make their way out the back door.

All three of them seem reluctant to let go, and they end up holding hands the entire time as they walk out along the shore a short way.

“Hey, I forgot to tell you guys,” Alex says suddenly. “I told my mom and Kara about the whole… you know,” she casts a look around to make sure they’re alone. “Gay thing.”

“Really?” Lucy asks. “How did it go?”

“Well, you know my mom tried to talk about it after all the rumors started going around school, but I kept denying it back then. So, she didn’t really seem surprised, but she said she was proud of me and completely fine with it.” Maggie squeezes her hand encouragingly. “Kara doesn’t really understand why people are so against it, and she also tried to buy like a bajillion rainbow stickers from the 99-cent store when I told her about the pride flag. So yeah, they’re cool with it, so uh, there’s that.”

“That’s so great, Alex,” Maggie tells her.

“Yeah,” Lucy says genuinely, pulling Alex into a hug, “I’m so happy for you.”

Alex hugs her back tight and then loosens one arm when Maggie joins in. “Thanks, guys.”

They end up walking back to the Danvers’ end of the beach after that, sitting down in the sand as they wait for dinner to be done. Somehow this devolves into a game of Truth or Dare, and before they know it a good half hour has passed.

“Alex, your turn.”

Alex eyes the way Lucy’s hair is still dripping from where she tried to hold a handstand in the shallow waves, probably deciding she doesn’t want to deal with the payback from that round. “Uh, truth.”

Lucy grins wolfishly, which makes Alex backtrack. “Wait, no! Dare. Dare!”

“Uh uh uh,” Lucy taunts. “Too late; first rule of Truth or Dare: can’t change your pick.”

Alex smacks her forehead with a sigh. “Ugh, fine. Hit me.”

Lucy pretends to ponder her question for a couple of seconds, her eyes lighting on Maggie with glee. “I’ll let you off the hook; how about we make it a group question? We all have to answer.”

Alex looks at Maggie with a hint of fear. “Oh God, what does that mean? Is that going to make it better or worse?”

Maggie shrugs, meeting Lucy’s gaze in challenge. “I’m game.”

Lucy looks absolutely thrilled. “Alex?”

“Yeah, sure, whatever.”

Lucy clears her throat. “Who made you realize you were gay? Like who was your first girl crush?”

Maggie’s mind flies to Eliza. Alex chokes. They both stay silent.

“No takers?” Lucy asks. “I’ll go first. Mine was Miss Honey from Matilda.”

She turns to Alex, whose face is redder than a tomato. “Skip me.”

“Okay, but you have to answer at some point. Rule two,” Lucy recites in a sing-song voice. “Maggie?

“Uh, this girl from school.” For once, thinking about Eliza doesn’t bring up any of the painful memories, only the good ones. “She was my best friend. We hung out together all the time. I knew there was something different about that way I liked her, but it took a long time to figure out why, and then even longer to admit it to myself that it wasn’t just some fluke. But you guys were there for most of that last part.”

Lucy bumps her shoulder with Maggie’s in support and nudges Alex with her other elbow. “See? It’s not so hard.”

“Ugh.” Alex rolls her eyes. “If I say Faith from Buffy will it get you off my back?”

Lucy’s eyes go wide with delight. “Oh my God, yes! She’s so pretty–” She cuts off with a gasp out of nowhere, startling both Alex and Maggie.

“What?” Alex asks. “Wha–”

Alex cuts off as Lucy grabs her shoulders in a death grip. “We have to watch Buffy.”

Alex looks at Maggie as if to say, help me, but Maggie has no idea what they’re talking about, so all she can do is shrug. Alex turns back to Lucy. “Maybe it’s just me, but I thought that’s what we’ve been doing this entire time? You know, every Tuesday night for the past, like, two years?”

“I know that, but we have to watch it again!” Lucy says, shaking Alex frantically with every word. “It’s going to be so much better because we know we both like girls now! Plus, Blockbuster just got season two in!”

Alex peels Lucy’s hands off her. “Are you going to end up fighting some little kid over the rental case like you did last time?”

Lucy scoffs indignantly, holding up her hands. “I didn’t fight her fight her. Besides, she wasn’t old enough to be watching it anyway. I did her parents a favor.”

“Okay, I give,” Maggie interrupts. “What are we talking about now? Why did Lucy fight a little girl?”

“Buffy,” Alex and Lucy answer at the same time.

“Buffy the Vampire Slayer?” Alex expands when they see Maggie doesn’t look any less confused. “It’s a TV show.”

“Oh.”

Except Lucy’s shaking Maggie in a death grip now. “You don’t know Buffy?!”

“I’m sorry?” she pleads, trying not to laugh at how scandalized Lucy’s expression is. “I wasn’t really allowed to watch a lot of TV.”

Lucy’s face softens a bit, but if anything, she looks even more determined. “Okay, we so have to change that. You have–”

She’s interrupted by a call from the Danvers’ back porch. “Girls! Dinner’s ready!”

“Coming!” Alex hollers back.

Lucy points between the three of them as they all stand up and dust off their clothes. “As soon as school’s out: you two. Me. Blockbuster. No escape. It’s a date.”

Maggie feels her ears heat up with the phrasing, and she notices a blush on Alex’s cheeks too. She can’t help but smile though as Lucy slips a hand in hers to pull her and Alex up the steps. She looks and sees Alex smiling too.

“Sounds good.”

…

Chapter Text

June 3^rd

The Danvers’ take Maggie shopping the next day. The mall they go to feels like it’s bigger than all of Blue Springs combined. Maggie’s in awe from the moment she climbs out of the car in the parking lot.

There had been a mall two towns over that her parents had taken her to a couple of times, but it was always for some special occasion, like her dad buying a new suit for court or her mom needing a new pair of dress shoes for work.

It had never been a trip for Maggie herself.

Save for the odd t-shirt from school or birthday present from her aunt, all of her clothes had been secondhand for as long as she could remember. She was used to missing buttons and her mom having to patch over holes. Even the zipper on her winter coat had been broken and would only zip up half the way.

So, she’s a little overwhelmed when Eliza leads them into a department store and starts asking Maggie what kind of clothes she prefers before pulling a bunch of things off the rack for her to try on.

Maggie’s palms start to sweat as she takes in the prices on the tags, so she pulls Alex into the dressing room with her after her mom and Kara go back out to the rack to look for a slightly shorter pair of jeans.

“Are you sure this is okay?” she asks, hating how small her voice sounds. “I don’t want your mom to spend all this money on me for no reason.”

Alex’s face is a mixture of confusion and pity. “It’s not for no reason; you need clothes, Maggie. It’s okay.”

She still isn’t sure, doesn’t know how to explain that no one’s ever bought things for her like this before.

“Hey,” Alex says, holding out her pinky. “I promise.”

They shake on it, and Maggie feels a little better.

They leave the department store with multiple bags, all filled with nothing but new clothes for Maggie. Shirts, one pair of jeans, a few pairs of shorts, a jacket and a sweatshirt, a couple of tank tops, some underwear and a few bras, a new pair of sneakers, and more socks than she’s ever owned in her life. All brand new. It makes her a little dizzy to think of it all, despite Alex’s promise.

And that’s only the first store they visit.

It turns out that the Danvers’ have a routine when they come to the mall. After a couple more stores (and a trip back out to the car to drop off their bags) they head to the food court for lunch, and after that, Kara makes a beeline for a row of candy dispensers. She hops eagerly on her feet as Eliza digs through her change purse.

“Only one, Kara,” she warns as she hands Kara a quarter. Two more get passed to Alex and Maggie. “And be careful with the knob when you turn it.”

“I broke that one,” Kara whispers to Maggie, pointing out an empty dispenser at the end of the row with an Out of Order sign taped to it. “The knob came off in my hand and then all the candy started spilling out and it wouldn’t stop. It was great.”

Kara ends up getting Runts because according to her, it’s the one that gives out the most pieces of candy. Alex gets a gumball and looks just as excited about it as her sister.

“It’s full of Nerds,” she tells Maggie happily.

Maggie can’t help it. “You’re a nerd, Danvers.”

Alex tries to stick her tongue out but fails with her mouth full of candy. “You’ve been hanging out with Lucy too much.”

Maggie laughs, and gets her own handful of Mike and Ikes.

Eliza informs them then that she has a couple of errands she has to run, and that they’re welcome to explore on their own in the meantime. She hands Alex some money, not with the strict instruction not to spend it all like Maggie is expecting, but with the promise of not letting Kara pick out more than one item at Claire’s.

“Oh, oh! Can we go there next, Alex, please?”

Alex rolls her eyes with a glance at Maggie. “Kara, I already told you, I’m getting too old for that store.”

“Please, please, please.” Kara whips out her best puppy-dog eyes. “I bet Maggie wants to go.”

Maggie has absolutely never heard of it, she thinks. But she’s a sucker for Kara.

“Um, sure.”

“Yes!” Kara fist-pumps the air, then promptly takes off in the opposite direction.

“Kara, wait! No running!” Alex smacks her forehead with the palm of her hand. “We’re gonna be stuck in there the whole rest of the time now, I hope you’re aware.”

Claire’s turns out to be quite the store. She can definitely see where Alex is coming from, but she’s never been anywhere like it and she’s astounded by the sheer volume of earrings they have for sale alone, so she can’t help but get a little excited as she takes it all in. Kara picks up on it and gives Maggie a personal tour of the entire store, Alex trailing behind them exasperatedly, making the girl at the register laugh as she watches them.

“See, Maggie, this one would look so cute on you! Oh, or this one! Should I get a bracelet or a necklace? Oh, or maybe another charm for my charm bracelet! Agh, why is it so hard to decide? Are you sure I can only get one thing?”

“You heard what Mom said–”

But Kara isn’t listening, her attention caught by something else. “Alex, look! They even have something you’ll like!”

Kara’s pointing at a section of best friend necklaces on the wall. Most of them are hearts split on two different chains, but there are a few options that have three necklaces.

“See? There’s one for you, one for Maggie, and one for Lucy.”

“Aww,” Maggie says. “That’s cute.”

Alex’s brow furrows. “You don’t think it’s kind of lame?”

“It’s not lame!” Kara is indignant. “Look, this one’s even all rainbow-y! It’s pretty!”

She takes a set off the hook to show them. It’s a jigsaw-puzzle heart split in three with the inscription Best Friends Forever. The metal looks purple from Maggie’s angle, but as Kara twists it about she sees it does actually have a rainbow sheen.

Even Alex’s eyes light up a little as she looks at it.

Maggie gives her a final nudge, literally and figuratively, as she elbows Alex. “C’mon, it’s perfect. You know Lucy will love it.”

Alex snatches the package out of Kara’s hands and holds it close to her chest. “Hurry up and pick out what you’re going to get before someone sees me in here.”

Maggie gives Kara a thumbs-up behind Alex’s back.

They end up spending another good half hour in the store before Kara can make up her mind.

(Lucy does, in fact, love the necklace when they give it to her.)

(Maggie wears hers until the chain breaks, years later. And then she just loops her section of the heart onto another one. Alex and Lucy do the same.)

…

June 8^th

“Hey, girls, I invited J’onn and M’gann over for dinner tonight, is that okay with you?” Eliza asks, walking into the living room.

“Sure,” Alex says not even taking her eyes off the TV screen, where she’s fully invested in luring a Pikachu with some food over to a surfboard.

(They’ve been playing this game ever since Kara and Alex got home from school – today was the last day of the year so they don’t have to worry about homework anymore – and Maggie’s learned a lot.)

“Yay!” Kara somehow manages to sit up from where she’d been hanging upside down without falling off the couch. “Do you think M’gann will let me come over tomorrow?”

Eliza smooths down some of Kara’s disheveled hair. “You know she says you’re always welcome, Kara.”

“Who?” Maggie asks Alex quietly.

“She’s one of our friends,” Alex explains. “J’onn helped her out a lot when she first got here too. She’s the one Kara’s always visiting.”

Maggie’s about to ask another question when Alex finishes up her run and gets to review all her photos. “Yes! Yes! Look, I got a good one!”

The Pikachu’s standing on the surfboard, arms out and leaning into the motion. It’s the best picture they’ve gotten of one so far.

Kara’s attention is back on the screen. “That’s so cute! I want to try now!”

Alex holds the controller up out of Kara’s reach. “No, it’s Maggie’s turn now.”

It’s about an hour later when the doorbell rings. Kara puts the controller down and zips over to answer the door.

“I’ll get it!”

Kara opens the door, and Maggie chokes on nothing but air and promptly forgets all about Pokémon, because standing on the other side is –

Cat Lady.

Cat Lady, who doesn’t look surprised to see Maggie, but instead extremely relieved.

She smiles. “Hello.”

Maggie gapes. “You’re–”

Alex looks back and forth. “You two know each other?”

“She’s the one that was leaving food out for me,” Maggie explains.

“What! Why didn’t you tell me?”

“How was I supposed to know you knew her?”

“It’s not like I ever introduced myself,” Cat Lady interjects. “I guess now would be a good time to do that, huh?”

…

“I’m so glad to see you’re all right. I was worried when you stopped showing up. If I had known this new case of J’onn’s was you, I would have been here a lot sooner. But I didn’t know until Eliza called me today.”

Dinner’s got about another thirty minutes until it’s ready, and they’re still waiting for J’onn, so for now they’re all sitting in the living room to talk.

M’gann. Maggie finally knows her name and can stop thinking of her as Cat Lady. Although when she admits to calling her that, M’gann laughs.

“The people at Animal Control call me something like that too. I’ve gotten in trouble a couple of times for feeding the cats, but it’s not like anyone else around here is trying to help them. I’ve just had to learn to be sneaky about it.”

Maggie feels suddenly shy. “Um, I guess I should thank you. For all of the food. And for not trying to get me in trouble.”

M’gann smiles, and her eyes are warm, and kind, and Maggie gets the same feeling of trust that she had gotten with J’onn.

“I knew if I approached you that I would just scare you off, and that’s the last thing I wanted to do. Although, I am sorry I didn’t intervene sooner,” M’gann’s face clouds as she eyes the bandage still on Maggie’s arm. “I wanted you to trust me. And I knew you were doing relatively okay from what Kara was telling me.”

“Wait,” Alex says, looking at Kara. “You knew M’gann was helping Maggie?”

Kara shrugs. “She’s the one that noticed Maggie all alone at the bonfire and told me to go talk to her. And then Maggie was our friend, and I always talk about my friends.”

The statement hits Maggie hard. She looks at M’gann in gratitude.

“Thank you,” she says sincerely. “Kara talking to me that night probably saved my life.”

…

Dinner with J’onn and M’gann turns out to be a lot of fun.

Maggie isn’t really surprised to learn M’gann is a Martian too, but she doesn’t dwell on the subject for too long, because M’gann gets a pained look in her eye until J’onn places a comforting hand on her shoulder. Kara changes the topic for them anyway, trying to get them both to shapeshift into her, and the amusement only increases from there.

Maggie can tell that they’ve all known each other for a while, but even amidst all the inside jokes and catching up with each other, she doesn’t ever feel left out.

In fact, just as she falls asleep that night, she has the fleeting thought that maybe she’s a part of this makeshift family now too.

…

“Margarita! Come here!”

Maggie’s hiding in the closet of her bedroom, shaking. This drinking thing is new, but Maggie’s already come to realize that she doesn’t like her father when he’s drunk. He’s prone to violent outbursts on a good day, but this is the third time he’s come home late from the bar this week, and Maggie’s pretty sure she won’t be able to keep blaming the bruises on playground accidents from recess much longer.

Steps start pounding up the stairs. Uh oh.

Maggie cringes as her bedroom door gets thrown open. It sounds like it’s nearly been ripped off its hinges.

She holds her breath, cowers more behind her hamper, trying to be small.

Please don’t look in the closet, please don’t–

Light suddenly floods the dark space and Maggie’s heart nearly leaps in her throat as her father’s fist descends towards her head. She gets yanked out of her hiding spot harshly by her hair, and tears flood her cheeks as pain lances down her scalp.

“Ow, please, I didn’t do anything, I swear, please!”

Her father’s face is a twisted, demonic version of the one she knows so well. Little Maggie had idolized her father, thought he could never hurt her in a million years, but nine-year-old Maggie knows better.

“You will answer me when I call for you. Is that understood, Margarita?”

“Yes! Yes! I’m sorry!”

Her father seizes her arm in both hands and twists savagely. Maggie can’t help but scream in agony, but she knows it’s worthless. Her mom won’t come to help her; she’s probably downstairs, cowering just as much as Maggie had been, not wanting to turn her husband’s wrath onto herself. And she’s found out the hard way that screaming usually just results in her father slapping her to shut up until she stops.

He finally lets go, and Maggie drops to the floor, her legs weak with the pain. Even through her clogged nose, she can smell the alcohol emanating from him, a smell she’s gotten all too familiar with lately.

“If you would just be a good girl, I wouldn’t have to do this. You just make me so angry sometimes. Look at all I provide you with. All I’m asking is that you be there to greet me when I get home, like a good daughter would. Is that too much to ask?”

Maggie can barely speak through her sobs. “No, I’m sorry; I didn’t know. I’ll be good; I will. I promise.”

Through her tears, Maggie watches as he walks away without another word. She’d gotten off easy tonight.

She lays on the floor for a while, unable to move, curled into a protective ball. Her arm throbs angrily, and she makes a mental note to wear a long-sleeved shirt to school tomorrow.

…

Maggie’s eyes fly open in the dark.

She knows where she is, knows she had just been dreaming.

It doesn’t stop her from rubbing at her arm though, where she can feel the ghost of her father’s hands twisting.

She sits up in bed. After a couple of nights sleeping on the couch in the living room, she had given the guest room another try. It had been going fine, until now.

Her shirt is clinging uncomfortably to her back from sweat, and her pulse is still racing from the memory. Why a nightmare chose now of all times to appear when she’s been on her own for months, she doesn’t know.

She climbs out of bed and pulls another shirt out from the dresser drawer where she had stashed all her new clothes. She changes and wipes the sweat from under her arms as best she can with the old one, but she still feels shaky and uncertain.

She doesn’t want to be alone right now.

She tiptoes out into the hallway and over to Alex’s room, and only hesitates for a few seconds before turning the knob.

She can make out Alex in the glow from the lava lamp on her desk, sprawled out on her bed and dead to the world.

“Alex?” she whispers. And then a little louder, “Alex.”

Alex jolts and peers blearily in her direction, hair all over her face. “Hmm, Maggie?”

“Can I sleep with you?”

“Sure,” Alex slurs, clearly still half-asleep. Her arms fling open jerkily as she moves to the far side of her bed. “C’mere.”

Maggie slips under the covers and lays down next to her. “Thanks.”

Alex must feel the trembling that Maggie still hasn’t gotten under control. “You okay?” she asks, sounding much more awake.

“Just a bad dream,” Maggie says, trying not to make eye contact. “I haven’t had one in a while.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,” Maggie says quickly. Too quickly. “No.”

Alex pulls her closer. “Well, then it’s a good thing you’ve entered the Anti-Nightmare Zone,” she says, voice pitching like she’s on a sales commercial and hand splaying out in a wide arc. “One hundred percent guaranteed, no nightmares allowed in this room. The sleep demons are contractually obligated to oblige to this decree, so we can sleep in peace knowing they can’t reach us here.”

The absurdity of the statement forces a laugh out of Maggie. “What?”

Alex laughs too, shrugging, voice returning to normal. “It’s what I always tell Kara when she has a nightmare. She likes to sleep in here sometimes. Although you’re lucky, because I never let her sleep in bed with me. She’s a cover hog. And she has this tendency to just start floating in her sleep and it’s so–” she cuts off as Maggie yawns. “You know you can stop me rambling at any time, right?”

“Hm,” Maggie hums, her eyes closing. “But I like when you ramble.”

She snuggles closer. Alex’s body is sleep-warm and soft, and she seems to be just as much as a cuddler as Lucy.

Wish Lucy was here too, she thinks sleepily.

“Alex?”

“Yeah?”

“Does the contract also work for dreams that are about things that really happened?”

Alex squeezes her tighter. “Yes. It works especially for those kinds.”

“Oh,” Maggie whispers. “Good.”

…

June 9^th

Maggie’s tired the next morning, but Alex smiles at her when they both get up, and although she’s a little embarrassed about the whole thing, she feels better.

They go downstairs and find Kara already up, hopping eagerly around the kitchen as Eliza cooks breakfast.

“I’m going to M’gann’s today!” she says instead of a greeting. “Maggie, she said you can come too. Do you want to? We get to play with dogs! It’ll be so much fun!”

Alex frowns. “What about me?”

“Sorry, sweetie,” Eliza says, flipping a pancake over on the stove. “You have a dentist appointment today, remember?”

Kara snorts, and then quickly covers her mouth with her hands.

“It’s not funny.” Alex glares at her. “Just because you can’t get cavities–”

Kara darts to hide behind Maggie’s back and makes the mistake of trying to finish Alex’s sentence. “Means I can have all the syrup from now on?”

Alex moves to start chasing her, but faster than Maggie can blink, Kara’s speeding out of the kitchen, and the bottle of syrup that was sitting on the table a second ago is no longer there.

“Kara! That’s cheating!”

…

M’gann comes to pick them up after breakfast, and with only some slight grumbling from Alex, they’re off.

On the ride downtown, Maggie gets to hear all about how M’gann helped Kara out when she was first learning how to control her strength, how Kara would practice by petting the dogs that visited the shop, and all about the different dogs she’s met so far.

“That reminds me, Kara,” M’gann says from the driver’s seat. “We have Bruno in again today. I know you really liked him.”

Kara fist-pumps. “Yes!”

When they get there, M’gann leads them through the front reception area and into the back where the grooming tables are. There’s a woman shaving a huge black dog on the table, and barking coming from somewhere off to the right.

“That’s Darla,” M’gann tells Maggie over the roar of the clippers. “I couldn’t run this place without her. And that’s Bruno.”

Bruno’s tail starts wagging as soon as he sees them, causing Darla to turn and notice them.

“Hey,” she greets M’gann, shutting off the clippers. “I’m almost finished up here and then I’m out. Who’s this?”

M’gann places a hand on Maggie’s shoulder. “This is Maggie. She’s staying with Kara and her family. Thought I’d show her around.”

Maggie waves. “Nice to meet you.”

Kara runs up to Darla and laughs when Bruno uses the opportunity to lick her face as soon as she’s in range. “You’re not going to stay and play with us?”

“Can’t today,” Darla says, ruffling Kara’s hair. “Sorry, kiddo. Next time, though, I promise. Now that school’s out, maybe you can start coming in on the weekdays again so I can see you more.”

“Okay!”

Darla finishes up with Bruno and lets him down off the table, where he immediately starts playing with Kara. Maggie joins in when he lopes over to her with a rope toy in his mouth.

“See? He’s really friendly. He likes you already!”

There’re two other dogs there besides Bruno – a yappy little Pomeranian and a mixed-breed that Maggie swears she’s seen at the park before. Kara gets all three of them in on a game of Tug of War, but no matter how hard the dogs pull, Kara doesn’t budge an inch. Maggie’s a little envious when Bruno’s almost able to pull her clean to the floor with one tug.

Somewhere in the midst of this controlled chaos, the Pomeranian’s owner comes for pick up, Darla leaves, and M’gann tells them that she just has to take care of a few things to finish up for the day, and then they can go for a walk.

Then the leashes and collars come out, and Kara takes the lead as they walk the two remaining dogs over to the nearby park.

M’gann sits on a bench straight away, while Kara pulls out a frisbee that Maggie hadn’t even realized she was carrying.

“Look, Maggie, I’ve been practicing!”

Maggie grins when the frisbee zips over the dogs’ heads, not too hard, and lands a reasonable distance away.

“Nice!”

Their game of fetch turns more into a game of throw-the-frisbee-and-then-chase-after-the-dogs-to-get-it-back, as neither one of the dogs seem to want to let go once they have it, but it’s still fun.

Kara seems to find it hilarious no matter how long they go on, but after a while, Maggie plops down on the bench next to M’gann, exhausted from all the running. “I see why you chose to sit this out,” she pants.

“I knew better after the first time trying to keep up with her. But I figure it’s good for her to work off some steam, even if she doesn’t really get tired,” M’gann states, watching Kara with amusement in her eyes. “Plus, it makes the dogs happy.”

The mixed-breed comes panting over to join them, flopping over at Maggie’s feet and tail wagging when she leans down to scratch his ears.

“How’d you end up owning the shop?” Maggie asks, curious.

M’gann hums, staring off in front of her. “Full story? I was in a bad place when I came to Earth. Wasn’t adjusting well, lived on the streets, made a lot of bad choices. Then I met J’onn. He took me out here to Midvale, helped me get myself cleaned up.” Her eyes turn wistful at the memory.

 “I started looking for jobs, and the couple that used to own the shop hired me on the spot because I was good with the dogs. Even let me move into the apartment upstairs when they found out I was living in a motel on the other side of town. They had moved out years before and weren’t too keen on renting it out after their first few tenants trashed the place. When they retired, they passed the place onto me, and now, here I am.”

“With the best job ever!” Kara exclaims as she runs over. She lets herself be tackled by Bruno, who starts licking her face as soon as she’s on the ground.

“It is a pretty good gig,” M’gann says, laughing as Bruno’s attention turns to her.

He lays down on his side when he’s had enough, tongue lolling in contentment. M’gann looks at Maggie and the two dogs sprawled out in various positions.

“Well, Kara, I’d say you did a pretty good job of wearing everybody out.”

Kara sits up on her elbows and looks around in surprise. “Aw, c’mon, you guys can’t be tired already!”

“I’d say I’m not,” Maggie groans. “But then I think my legs would kill me.”

…

Chapter Text

June 10^th

Maggie groans from her spot on the floor, sprawled out on Alex’s carpet. Lucy, who’s lying on her stomach flipping through a magazine, looks over at her.

“You good?”

Maggie groans again. “I have to pee but I don’t want to get up.”

They had spent the majority of the day at the beach while Alex attempted to teach Maggie how to surf. It was a lot of fun, but now, despite Alex’s many reassurances that she had done well for her first day, Maggie feels like she got hit by a truck.

“I tried to warn you Alex wouldn’t let you stop once you got started.” Lucy elbows her with a teasing grin. “She’s brutal that way.”

Alex huffs from where she’s lying on her bed. “Maggie’s the one who insisted on staying out that long. I tried to go easy on her and end it where I normally end the first lessons.”

“Yeah, but I’m not a little kid,” Maggie whines. “I can take more than they can.”

Lucy pokes Maggie in the stomach. “And how’d that work out for you, Sunshine?”

“Ow! Lucy, stop! I really have to pee!”

“Make me!”

Alex throws a pillow at them when it starts edging on turning into a full-on tickle fight. “You guys, c’mon. Are we watching Buffy or not?”

“We are!” Lucy springs up, sitting on the edge of Alex’s bed with her hands folded politely in her lap, leaving Maggie on floor.

Maggie pushes up to her feet and stands with what feels like every muscle in her body protesting. “Hold on, I’ll be right back.”

“Oh! Could you get me a drink from the kitchen while you’re up?” Lucy asks, smiling innocently.

“But I’m not going down–” Maggie glares as Lucy whips out her best puppy-dog eyes. “Fine.”

After a quick stop at the bathroom, Maggie makes her way (slowly and painfully) downstairs. She hears voices coming from the kitchen before she even reaches the landing. M’gann had been talking to Eliza when they came back from the beach and she’d greeted them all before they headed up to hang out in Alex’s room, but it looks like she’s still here.

Maggie’s just moving into the hallway when she registers what they’re talking about. Her. She freezes and catches the tail-end of M’gann’s next question.

“–have you looked at any foster homes yet?”

Maggie tiptoes a little closer so she can hear Eliza’s answer. “I’ve looked at a couple of options, and J’onn said he’s looked into some as well. We both agreed that we’d give her a couple of weeks to recover before we made any major decisions. But I think it would be good for Maggie to find a home sooner rather than later. That way she can get settled in and have time to adjust before school starts in the fall. And that’s another thing we have to think about. How she’s going to catch up on–”

Heart pounding, Maggie backtracks up the stairs, anxiety spiking in her chest. She knew this was coming, but still.

What if there’s no family in Midvale who wants to take her in? What if everyone takes one good look at her and decides they don’t want to deal with a problem child like her? Would she have to leave to go live somewhere else? Or what if someone does take her in and then they find out she’s gay and kick her out and this whole cycle repeats itself?

What if–

“What, no drink?”

Maggie blinks out of her thought spiral at the sound of Lucy’s voice. She’d made it back to Alex’s room on autopilot. Lucy’s still sitting on the bed while Alex is up and fiddling with the DVD player.

“Maggie?”

Lucy’s looking at her, her expression now concerned. Oh. Right. Maggie didn’t answer her. But she can’t seem to bring herself to even now that she’s thinking about it.

Lucy’s moving towards her now. “Hey, are you okay?”

And now Alex is looking their way too, as Lucy gently pulls Maggie over to sit on the bed. Alex moves to sit on the other side.

“It’s okay,” Maggie tries to assure them, finding her voice. “I’m… I’m fine.”

But Lucy is pulling her into her side, and Maggie is burying her face in her shoulder and squeezing Lucy’s arm, needing the contact.

“It’s stupid,” she tries again, but it comes out as a whisper.

“Hey, no, it’s not,” Lucy tells her. “Whatever it is, it’s not stupid.”

“You’re not hurt, are you?” Alex frets, running her hands over the parts of Maggie she can reach, checking for injuries. “I knew the board actually hit you that one time and I shouldn’t have listened to you say you were fine!”

Maggie laughs as she realizes that neither one of them has any clue about what she’d just overheard. She bats Alex’s hands away. “No, I’m not hurt. It’s okay. I wasn’t lying about that.”

Alex stills, smushing Maggie into a hug from the other side. “Then what’s wrong?”

Maggie sighs. “Your mom is talking about looking into foster homes and I’m just… I’m scared.”

“What are you scared of?” Lucy asks softly.

“Just… everything. I mean, look how great my first home turned out to be, and that was with my real parents, the people who were supposed to love me the most.” Maggie’s voice cracks, and she gets squeezed tighter on both sides. “Why should I expect this to be any different?”

“Maggie, my mom and J’onn would never place you in a home you didn’t feel comfortable in.”

“But there’s gotta be only so much they can do and I know the kid never gets any say in these things, so–”

“No.” Alex shakes her head, cutting her off. “You’re part of the family now and that means we’re not going to let anything bad happen to you.”

“And Alex and I are gonna be with you every step of the way,” Lucy adds. “Promise.”

“Yes,” Alex says. “I’m here for you, no matter what. And that goes for both of you. Always.”

Lucy throws her arm around Alex, smushing Maggie further between them. “Me too.”

Maggie smiles. “Me three.”

…

June 20^th

“That looks good, Maggie!”

Maggie squints at the paper in front of her before casting a doubtful look over to Kara’s easel. They’re quickly losing the light of the sunset they’d been trying to capture from the back porch, but Maggie doesn’t need it to see how much better Kara’s painting looks compared to hers.

“Does it really?”

Kara nods enthusiastically. “Yeah! You got the colors perfect!” She puts her paintbrush down and stretches her arms up over her head. She’s somehow managed to get paint nearly up to her elbows on both arms. “Isn’t painting fun?”

That’s at least one thing Maggie can agree with. “Yeah, it is. Thanks for asking me to join you.”  

Light nearly gone now, they gather up their supplies and leave their paintings in the mudroom to dry. Kara leads them into the kitchen to wash their brushes out in the sink, where they’re greeted with Eliza sitting at the table, a bunch of papers strewn out in front of her.

She looks a little frustrated, but she puts her pen down and smiles when she sees them. “Hey, girls. Have fun?”

“Yes!” Kara says as she turns the water on. “Maggie’s really good.”

Maggie blushes. “I’m not.”

 “I’m sure you did a great job, sweetie,” Eliza reassures her. “I want to see them when they’re dry. But also, Maggie, can I talk to you for a minute?”

“Oh, uh. Sure.” Maggie falters with the dirty brushes she’s holding, heart beginning to pound. Eliza hadn’t mentioned anything to her since the night Maggie heard her talking with M’gann, but Maggie’s certain that’s what’s coming.

Kara takes her brushes and moves to the side so Maggie can wash her hands. “I’ll clean them for you,” she tells her.

“Right. Thanks.”

“Don’t be nervous, Maggie.” Eliza gets up, placing a hand on her shoulder. “I just wanted to let you know that J’onn and I have been looking into some foster homes. There’s no rush; you’ve welcome to stay here as long as you need to. But today we got an offer that I think would be a great fit for you. Someone you already know.”

“Oh.” Maggie blinks. “Really? Who?”

Eliza smiles.

…

June 23^rd

“And this would be your room,” M’gann says, letting Maggie walk in the room first. There’s a nice, albeit generic-looking, bed with a nightstand, desk, and dresser, and a door leading to what Maggie assumes is a closet. “I never changed any of the furniture in here since I never really use it, but this would be enough to get us started. And then you could pick out anything you wanted.”

It’s the last room left in the tour and Maggie finds herself reeling in disbelief. M’gann’s apartment above the shop is really nice, and way bigger than Maggie ever expected it to be.

But there’s still one thing that she can’t seem to wrap her head around.

“Would you really do all this for me?” she asks quietly, staring down at the floor.

The only thing making her feel better is the fact that M’gann seems just as nervous about this whole thing as she is. Almost as if it’s her that’s being interviewed or something, and not Maggie who should be thankful for this generous opportunity.

M’gann lays a hand on her shoulder, making her look up. “It would be my honor, if you’ll have me. I promise I’ll always look out for you, no matter what. And I just want you to know that Alex and Lucy would always be welcome over here as well.”

And here it is already, the moment Maggie’s been dreading, but the one she knows she needs to get over with if she wants to have any peace of mind.

“About– about that. There’s something that you should probably know,” she stutters, fiddling with her necklace and trying to brace herself for the rejection that’s about to come. “About me. I–”

She can’t say it.

“I’m–”

Why can’t I just say this without tearing up for once?

“I like them! Alex and Lucy. I like girls. I’m gay. And you should know that before you make any major decisions because I know it’s not–”

M’gann pulls her into a hug before she can finish the thought. “It is okay. It’s okay, Maggie. This house will be a safe space for you, always. You never have to hide who you are with me. On that, you have my word.”

The dam breaks, and they stay like that for a long while and as Maggie cries into M’gann’s chest, some of the fear she’s been holding onto for so long trickles away.

Maybe everything really is going to be okay.

…

August 26^th

“Maggie! Is that your schedule? Let me see!”

Lucy nearly tackles Maggie as she comes out the front door of the shop, which is quite a feat considering Lucy’s still fully straddling her bike.

The piece of paper gets ripped out of Maggie’s hands before she can even say hello.

“Hi, to you too,” she says sarcastically, grinning at how eager Lucy is.

Lucy’s too absorbed in looking over the block schedule to notice, so Alex replies for her, grinning at Maggie while sitting on top of her own bike. “Hi, Maggie.”

“We all have lunch together!” Lucy shouts excitedly. “And Maggie, you have gym with me and homeroom with Alex and we’re all in the same chem class! This is gonna be great!”

With no attainable record of her previous schooling and going off the lie that she had been home-schooled her whole life with some creativity on J’onn’s part, Maggie had to take several placement tests in order to enroll in Midvale High for the next year. And despite not finishing up her freshman year, she had placed well above the level of the average sophomore, according to the school. With those tests and some catch-up coursework over the summer that Maggie completed diligently, she was even able to get in some of the same level classes that Lucy and Alex would be in as juniors, although she would still be stuck in the sophomore English and History classes.

“Sweet,” Alex says, holding out her hand for a high-five from each of them. “Maybe this year won’t be so bad after all.”

“I know you actually like school, you nerd,” Maggie jokes.

Alex sticks her tongue out. “You’re not allowed to call me a nerd anymore, nerd. I saw your test scores.”

“Hey! They really weren’t that hard! I figured out the tricks to those multiple-choice tests ages ago.”

“Yeah, but that doesn’t help when it comes to the written answers and all the essays. So sorry, welcome to the nerd club, Sawyer.”

Maggie grumbles playfully as she takes the copy of her schedule back from Lucy, folding it up to put in her back pocket.

The bell over the door rings as M’gann hurries out. “Maggie, wait! Here.” She hands Maggie some cash and looks at all of them. “Have fun. Don’t go too crazy, you three.”

Maggie only hesitates a second before she slips the money into her pocket and gives M’gann a grateful look. ‘We won’t.”

“We’ll have her home by ten!” Lucy promises with a wave.

M’gann chuckles before heading back inside. “I’m holding you to that.”

Maggie looks back at Alex and Lucy, the fact that they were both on bikes truly sinking into her brain. “Okay, are we still going to the amusement park? I thought we were taking your car?” she asks Lucy.

Lucy makes a sweeping gesture at the two bikes. “We still are! I just changed my mind! This is more romantic,” she declares. Her cheeks flush a little, but the bravado in her stance makes up for it.

“But I don’t have a–”

“That’s where the romantic part comes in,” Lucy cuts her off, patting her handles with a wink. “Hop on, Sunshine.”

Maggie casts a dubious glance at Alex, who is trying not to laugh. “Isn’t that just going to make it hard for you to see and steer and I don’t know, ride altogether?”

Lucy clutches a hand over her heart. “You wound me with how much you underestimate my skills.”

Alex snorts, her composure finally breaking. “Don’t worry, I’ve got pegs you can ride on after she falls over.”

It only slightly makes Maggie feel better.

(But to give Lucy some credit, they don’t fall over. They just crash into a fire hydrant that Lucy can’t see before Maggie jumps off and takes Alex up on her offer.)

The amusement park on the boardwalk is in full swing when they get there, and Maggie takes in all the commotion with awe.

“So, what do you guys want to do first?” Lucy asks.

“Rollercoaster!” Alex points.

Maggie looks at the wooden monstrosity looming over them. “There’s no way I’m getting on that thing.”

“Aww, c’mon! I’ve been on it plenty of times; it’s perfectly safe.”

The cars go zipping by their heads, people screaming over the roar of the ride.

“Think I’m good, thanks.”

Lucy grabs both of their hands, pulling them further into the park. “C’mon, we’ll find something we all want to do. Let’s go!”

…

Swings? Check.

Frog hopper? Check.

Mirror maze? Check.

Racing slides? Check.

Roller coaster? (A very reluctant on Maggie’s part but Alex managed to wear her down) check.

(“See, it wasn’t that bad! It’s nowhere near as fun as flying with Kara.”

“Then remind me to never go flying with your sister. Ever.”)

A few more rides and a couple of games later, they end up at the Ferris wheel. “You can see the whole boardwalk from the top,” Lucy tells Maggie as they step in line. “It’s my favorite view.”

But when they finally get all the way to the top, it isn’t the view Lucy’s admiring.

“It’s beautiful,” Maggie says, looking in awe at how far she can see the ocean stretch from up there. But when she turns, she catches Lucy staring at her and Alex out of the corner of her eye.

“It is,” Lucy agrees, and Maggie feels herself blush.

“Look,” Alex says, oblivious to the moment and the way Lucy’s eyes light up as they fall on her. “You can see my house from up here.”

Maggie laughs at the excitement in Alex’s voice, and as they begin their descent, she realizes she’s never felt this free in her entire life.

They ride every ride they can before they have to stop for dinner, which they eat in the park at one of the picnic tables underneath the fishing lines to keep the seagulls out. After dinner, they pass by a dart game booth, and Maggie spends the better part of the next half hour trying to win a stuffed cat to give to Kara as a replacement for Streaky.

She jumps in victory when the attendant finally hands one over, and turns to see two very amused grins aimed in her direction.

“What?”

Alex smirks. “Nothing. You’re just cute when you’re all determined, Sawyer.”

Maggie doesn’t know what to say to that. “Kara’s gonna like it, right?”

“Of course she will.”

Eventually, it’s time to leave, none of them wanting to spend any more money. They exit the park, but instead of going to the spot they parked the bikes, they head out to the pier. They sit with their legs dangling over the side and lean out against the railing. Maggie doesn’t want the night to end, and she can tell Lucy and Alex don’t either.

Alex eventually breaks the content silence. “You guys ready for school to start?”

Maggie kicks her feet in the air and rests her chin on her arms. “Not really. I’m kind of nervous. I’ve never been the new kid.”

“It’ll be okay,” Alex says. She leans into Maggie’s side, resting her head on her shoulder. “We won’t let anything happen to you. And not all the kids are jerks either. Most of them are pretty nice.”

“Then it already sounds better than my last school.” Maggie sighs, remembering all the bullying she had endured before the kids started leaving her alone. She was picked on for her skin color, for her size, for the way they all knew her dad treated her.

Lucy rests her head on Maggie’s other shoulder, possibly reading Maggie’s mind, although Maggie still hasn’t told either of them much about her life before Midvale. “You have us now. We’ve got your back.”

Maggie’s chest gets that warm feeling that she’s starting to get used to now. They haven’t really talked about it, but she knows she’s not the only one who’s noticed how much more touchy-feely they’ve all gotten with each other lately. She licks her lips, and despite the way her heart starts pounding a little harder, she feels brave.

“About us… I’m not going crazy, right? You guys feel the same way?”

Alex nods. “You’re not crazy.”

“Of course!” Lucy sits up. “Did you not realize this was a date this entire time?”

Maggie blinks at her.

“This was a date?” Alex asks incredulously, echoing Maggie’s thoughts.

Lucy smacks her forehead. “Ugh, you two are hopeless! I thought we were all on the same page here.” She pouts. “I was trying to be romantic.”

Maggie slips her hand into Lucy’s, feeling Lucy relax back against her. “At least we’re on the same page now.”

“Yeah,” Lucy sighs contentedly. Then, “You okay over there, Alex?”

Maggie turns her head slightly, sees Alex’s face is redder than she’s ever seen it even in the dark of the evening.

“Yes,” Alex squeaks, then clears her throat. “Sorry. I don’t know how any of this is supposed to work.” She fidgets with the chain around her neck. “But we have time, right? To figure it out?”

“Yeah,” Lucy says, as Maggie’s other hand finds Alex’s and squeezes. “We’ll figure it out. The three of us. Together.”

Maggie looks up at the stars, sandwiched between them both, and relishes in the hope blooming in her chest.

“I can’t wait.”

…

Chapter Text

February 17^th, 2015

“Hey Maggie,” Kara calls from somewhere in the living room, where she’s been unpacking some of the (many) piled-up boxes. “This fell out of one of your boxes. I swear it was already broken. Should I put it in the junk pile?”

Maggie turns from where she’s stacking dishes in the cabinets to see what Kara’s talking about. There’s an old watch dangling from her fingers and when Maggie spots it, she moves quickly, snatching it from Kara’s hand.

“Nope! Not junk!”

That makes a curious Alex come up from the floor, where she’s been trying (rather unsuccessfully, although Maggie’s not going to point that out) to put their new kitchen table together for the past thirty minutes.

She also recognizes the watch that Maggie’s now possessively clutching to her chest. She should, considering it used to belong to her.

“You still have that? Didn’t it break a long time ago?” she asks.

Maggie turns away, pouting slightly. “I had to keep it,” she says defensively. “It was the first thing you ever gave me.”

Alex comes over then and tugs Maggie toward her, kissing her gently. “That’s sweet, babe. But that’s certainly not the best gift I’ve ever given you.” She pulls on the chain around Maggie’s neck, where she keeps her ring, the one that matches Lucy’s and Alex’s own, a symbol of their promise to each other.

Maggie slips the watch into her pants pocket, leaning into Alex’s shoulder. “Definitely not. But I want to hold on to it anyway.”

“I hate to interrupt you lovebirds,” Kara says, interrupting nonetheless, “But Alex, you said you could do it by yourself, but Lucy should be back any minute now with the food. Can I please help with the table?”

Alex huffs out a sigh. “Fine,” she relents, handing Kara the screwdriver she’s been hoarding.

Kara squeals and claps her hands with the permission, and sure enough, they have a fully functioning dining table thanks to a little super-speed when Lucy walks into the house ten minutes later.

She reaches Maggie first, who’s lingering by the counter and watching Alex and Kara argue about the exact placement of the table. “Hey Sunshine,” Lucy greets, giving Maggie a kiss and holding up two bags bulging with takeout containers. “I got your favorite.”

“Thanks.” Maggie takes one of the bags off her hands and wraps her other arm around her, pressing another kiss into Lucy’s shoulder. “I can’t believe we have a house now.”

Lucy grins, her expression soft and so, so beautiful. “Well believe it, Sawyer, ‘cause it’s all ours.”

The other two join them then, and Lucy passes the takeout bag to Kara, which is probably a bad call. But none of the three of them seem to care as Kara gives them a moment alone, taking the food over to the table.

Alex pulls them both into a hug. “Happy anniversary,” she says softly.

Unable to really pinpoint the exact moment they had gone from just friends to something more, the three of them have settled on celebrating the day they all officially met as their anniversary. Maggie loves it, especially considering how she still loathes Valentine’s Day. It gives her something to look forward to at this time of year, something to remind her that there’s always light amidst the darkness.

“Happy anniversary,” Lucy repeats, kissing Alex, and then Maggie again, lingering longer than they maybe should considering Kara’s in the same room.

Maggie just melts into it, relishing in the fact that they’ve made it this far, that they’re all right here, right now in this very moment. “I love you both,” she whispers when Lucy lets her go.

“Love you too,” Alex and Lucy say in tandem.

Alex’s phone chirps from where it’s sitting on the counter, and she breaks away to check it, swiping the screen to read the message.

“My mom says Friday sounds good for dinner and that she can’t wait to see this place,” she tells them.

“M’gann and J’onn both said they’ll be here too,” Maggie says. “I think that’ll give us enough time to get this place looking less like a cardboard maze and more like people actually live here.”

“What’s for dinner?” Alex asks Lucy.

“Chinese. I figured we owed Kara for all her help today.”

Alex freezes, then quickly moves towards the table. “Kara Danvers, you better not have eaten all the potstickers already!”

Kara freezes with her chopsticks poised in midair, mouth stuffed too full to answer. There’s an empty container sitting in front of her. She gives Alex a sheepish grin and shrugs. “Mno?”

Lucy laughs. “Here we go.”

Maggie takes her hand so they can join their family at the table. Sibling squabbling or not, she wouldn’t have it any other way.

Chapter Text

February 13^th, 2002

Maggie doesn’t want to talk about it.

She really, really doesn’t want to talk about it.

In fact, she would like everyone to stop talking about it.

Valentine’s Day this, Valentine’s dance that.

Like, please. Shut up already.

But it’s been all everyone can talk about at school for weeks now, and it’s only gotten worse as the actual day approaches, let alone the dance on Friday. Maggie had made it abundantly clear to Alex and Lucy that she did not want to celebrate, let alone even think about Valentine’s Day (but that the two of them could if they wanted to) but the rest of the world doesn’t seem to have gotten the memo.

Which is why when M’gann asks her if she’s okay at dinner that night, as she sits at the table and tries to pretend that she’s actually hungry, she doesn’t know how to answer.

Maggie’s sure that M’gann has been picking up on how off she’s been this week, despite her refusal to say anything about it.

M’gann has explained to her a couple of times now how far her telepathic powers extend, how she’ll never invade Maggie’s thoughts without her consent, but how there are limits to what a non-telepathic species like humans are capable of shielding from her, and how strong emotions tend to slip through.

So, Maggie’s fairly certain that M’gann’s picked up on the growing pit of anxiety that now sits like acid in her stomach as she thinks about how terrible school is going to be the next day.

The dread of seeing all the decorations and people exchanging cards and candy-grams at lunch and notes stuffed in lockers and pink and red and white everywhere and–

A hand on her arm.

“Maggie?”

Maggie blinks back to the present, sees M’gann’s concerned gaze. She’d gotten up from the table at some point and is now at Maggie’s side. “Sorry. I’m okay.”

M’gann hums in that way she does when she knows Maggie’s lying but is trying not to push it.

Maggie sighs. She’s been working with her therapist at admitting when she’s not okay or in pain. She’s not sure it will ever be easy though. “I’m not feeling that great,” she says truthfully.

M’gann immediately reaches up to feel her forehead.

“Not like that.” Maggie shakes her head. The hand retracts and Maggie’s mouth twists up. She leans forward slightly, missing the touch and grounding pressure. “I’m just…”

M’gann pulls Maggie forward into a hug and rubs her back. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Maggie’s pretty much told M’gann everything, so she knows M’gann probably can guess what’s really going on. How she’s beating herself up inside for feeling such a conflicted cocktail of emotions.

Because hadn’t what happened turned out to be a good thing, in the end?

If it wasn’t for that stupid Valentine’s Day card last year, she wouldn’t have escaped from her father, she wouldn’t have come to Midvale, wouldn’t have met Alex and Lucy and Kara and Eliza and J’onn, wouldn’t be living with M’gann, wouldn’t have met her therapist who’s been helping her recognize and heal from all the abuse she suffered for most of her life… in the end, hadn’t her mistake turned out to be the best thing that could have ever happened to her?

So why does she feel so sad right now?

Why does the thought of going out and buying chocolate and flowers and maybe some cheesy teddy-bear for Lucy and then celebrating with her girlfriends fill her with such dread?

Why does her heart still ache when she thinks about her parents when she knows she’s better off without them?

“Hey,” M’gann says, after Maggie still can’t bring herself to say anything. “It’s okay. Want to just call it an early night, watch something on TV, and relax?”

Maggie’s shoulders slump in relief. “Yeah.”

“Then you can go get changed. Don’t worry about cleaning up in here; I’ve got it handled.”

A furry head rams into her leg as soon as Maggie stands up from the table. A meow comes from the floor, making sure no one forgets to fill up the cat bowl.

“Looks like I have to feed Streaky first,” Maggie laughs.

They’d taken the stray calico in shortly after Maggie had moved in with M’gann, and as soon as Kara heard, she insisted on naming her Streaky. And of course, it being Kara, no one could say no to her.

Maggie heads to shower after filling the bowl up to the cat’s satisfaction, changing into her favorite pair of pajamas afterward. By the time she comes out of the bathroom, M’gann’s got the table cleared off and the dishes cleaned.

“Your tree is looking pretty good,” she tells Maggie, referring to the bonsai tree that’s sitting in the kitchen window in its little pot. Maggie had fallen in love with bonsais when her therapist introduced her to some different forms of art therapy, teaching Maggie how to prune a couple of the plants that she keeps in her office. M’gann had bought her a care guide and her own bonsai for the holidays, and Maggie had (unashamedly) cried over being given such a thoughtful (expensive) gift.

Maggie smiles, proud at the work she’s put into taking care of it.

“Anything good on tonight?” M’gann asks, motioning to the TV out in the living room.

“I don’t know,” Maggie says. “Guess we’ll find out.”

They end up just watching repeats of different episodes they’d seen before from various shows, but it’s everything Maggie needs at the moment. And when she bids M’gann good night, she does so with a smile on her face.

It just doesn’t last for long.

…

February 14^th

She’s in her room, trying to shove things into her backpack, but the zipper’s stuck and nothing’s fitting right. Half of the items seem to just pass through the bag and fall onto the floor anyway, no matter how many times she tries.

 There’s another loud crash from downstairs and Maggie gives up on it, dropping the backpack and moving over to the windowsill. Pounding footsteps start moving up the steps and the yelling gets louder, but her ears are ringing oddly and it all just sounds like gibberish.

She pulls up on the windowpane, but it doesn’t budge. She frantically checks the latch, but it’s unlocked, and no matter what she does the window doesn’t move.

 The steps are getting louder, the yelling getting louder, and Maggie’s heart feels like it’s going to burst out of her chest with the fear that’s consuming her.

She pushes and pulls with all her strength. The window doesn’t open.

She punches the glass, desperate. Her hand reverberates with pain, but not even a crack appears.

The doorknob starts rattling. The lock isn’t going to stop him for long.

Maggie beats at the window with both fists. This was her one chance to escape and she blew it, and now he’s probably going to kill her for it.

The door flies open and slams against the wall, and Maggie screams.

…

Maggie’s eyes shoot open in the dark.

The first thing she takes in is the faint glow from the ceiling, the glow-in-the-dark stars Kara had helped her put up. After Maggie had confessed to having nightmares, Kara had suggested them as a way to help comfort her in the middle of the night, remind her where she is, and she has to admit, they really do help.

The second thing she takes in is the fact that she’s in the midst of a panic attack. A heart-pounding, gasping for air, full-body tremor panic attack. She’s gotten better at recognizing when she’s having one and knows what she can do to help herself when she has one alone. She sits up and fumbles around blindly until her hand finds the stuffed animal she’s looking for.

She hugs Streaky to her chest – stuffed-Streaky that is, the distinction necessary ever since they’d taken in the actual cat – and focuses on the techniques she’s learned in therapy to get her breathing back under control.

Once her lungs start working again, the trembling eases slightly. After a few more minutes, she climbs out of bed, knowing she won’t be able to completely calm down for a while. She’s sweaty and shaky and feels all-around gross. She needs to change her shirt, which is sticking to her back with clammy sweat, but decides to get some water from the kitchen first.

She steps as quietly as she can out of her room, not wanting to wake M’gann up. She passes by Streaky curled up on the couch and gives her a quick head-scritch on her way to the kitchen.

The light filtering in from the window over the sink is enough for her to see, so she reaches into the overhead cabinet where they keep the glasses without turning the lights on. But her hands are still shaking, and she still has that disconnected feeling that comes with suddenly waking up in the middle of the night. So her fingers fumble with the rim of a glass, and she watches in slow motion as it tips forward and falls out of the cabinet, hitting the edge of the counter at just the right angle to shatter all over the floor.

Crash!

Maggie goes into autopilot at the sound, immediately dropping into a crouch with her arms up to protect her head, and braces for the next hit.

But nothing else happens. She opens her eyes. Realizes that the house is silent, except for the roaring in her ears and her once-again ragged breathing. Then she takes in all the glass around her feet.

Oh. It was just me. Just a glass. That’s okay.

That’s okay; all she has to do is clean it up. She picks up one of the bigger pieces.

Clean it up fast, and hopefully, he won’t notice that anything even happened.

Won’t get the chance to reprimand her for being so clumsy, or send her out to go buy a replacement even though the closest store is a good three-mile walk from their house.

Pain lances through her palm and she winces, dropping the jagged piece she was trying to pick up. Blood wells up from the slice and drips onto the floor.

That’s not so good. A cut is going to be a lot harder to hide, and if her mom asks how she got it, she’s gonna have no choice but to tell the truth, and then he’ll find out anyway and–

“Maggie?”

Light floods the dark kitchen and Maggie’s eyes shut as she winces from the sudden change.

Oh no, now she doesn’t even have the chance to clean up her mess before someone sees, she’s been caught literally red-handed–

“I’m sorry,” she says frantically. “I’m sorry; I’ll, I’ll clean it up. I didn’t mean it. Please don’t get mad. I’m sorry.”

“Maggie, the glass doesn’t matter; I want to make sure you’re okay. Where are you hurt?”

“I, I was just trying to get a drink, but it slipped. I’m sorr–”

“Hey, hey. Maggie. Can you tell me where you are?”

“Wha–”

Maggie blinks, realizes her vision is so blurry due to tears; wipes them away with the hand that isn’t stinging. Sucks in a deep breath. M’gann comes into focus, crouching in front of her, and reality rushes back to her in a wave.

“The kitchen,” Maggie says, once the question sinks in. “We’re in the kitchen.”

 M’gann nods, both hands splayed out loosely in front of her, fingers spread. “Okay, good. What’s something else you can see?”

“You. The fridge. The trash can.” Maggie’s eyes wander back to her bloody palm. “My hand is bleeding.”

“It is. Can I take a look at it?”

Maggie nods, but as soon as M’gann reaches out to get a better look, she flinches back, her body reacting instinctively.

“Sorry. I’m sorry,” she says, hating herself. She knows M’gann would never, ever hurt her, and doesn’t want M’gann to think she doesn’t trust her.

M’gann puts her hand back down immediately. “It’s okay. You don’t have anything to apologize for, Maggie. Do you think you can stand? I want to get you away from the glass.”

Maggie has to think about it – a surprisingly harder task than it probably should be – as she registers how much her legs are aching from squatting so long and all the broken glass that’s scattered around her bare feet. She doesn’t trust herself to maneuver around it with how much she’s trembling. She reaches out this time, keeping her injured hand coiled against her stomach.

“Help,” she says.

M’gann takes her arm, gently guiding her up. “I’ve got you.” She leads them safely out of the kitchen and into the hallway. “Let’s go to the bathroom and get you cleaned up.”

When they get there, Maggie sits down on the toilet lid while M’gann pulls the first aid kit out of the closet. She uses a hand towel to wipe the blood from Maggie’s wrist and palm and then swipes over the cut with an alcohol wipe. Maggie winces at the sting.

“Sorry,” M’gann says, covering it with a bandage. She puts a few pieces of medical tape on the edges to help it say on. “There, all set. Are you hurt anywhere else?”

Maggie shakes her head and accepts the tissues M’gann hands her so she can wipe her face. She tugs uncomfortably at the front of her shirt, peeling the sweat-soaked fabric away from her skin.

M’gann puts a hand on her knee. “I’ll go get you some clean clothes, and then I’ll clean up in the kitchen and get you something to drink. I’ll be back in a minute, okay?”

Maggie nods again, and takes the dry pajamas M’gann brings her gratefully. She waits until the door’s closed before stripping out of her old ones. She changes slowly, wiping away the cold sweat from her body with the used towel before putting the clean clothes on.

The whir of the vacuum sounds briefly as M’gann cleans up the kitchen floor, and Maggie comes out of the bathroom just as M’gann finishes pouring another glass of water. Maggie downs half of it immediately.

“Thanks,” she says. “Sorry I woke you up.”

M’gann shakes her head. “Please stop apologizing, Maggie. I’m here for you, no matter what time it is, okay? Now, do you want to go back to bed?”

She’s exhausted, but still reeling from the dump of adrenaline. “Is it okay if I watch TV for a bit? I don’t think I’ll be able to fall asleep yet.”

So that’s how they both end up on the couch again, watching some late-night infomercials with the volume turned down low, Streaky curled up between them. Maggie figures she’ll fall asleep fast out of sheer boredom alone, but after close to an hour, she doesn’t feel any less awake. M’gann, on the other hand, has nodded off at least twice, only to jolt back up when she catches herself, so when Maggie sees her head bob down again, she clears her throat.

M’gann blinks at the noise, shaking her head to rouse herself, as Maggie turns the TV off and stands. “I’m getting tired,” Maggie whispers. “I think I can go back to sleep now.”

M’gann pushes to her feet with a yawn, which dislodges Streaky, who jumps down to the floor with an indignant meow. “I’ll walk you back to your room.”

Streaky follows them, jumping up as Maggie climbs into bed, and M’gann waits until she’s settled on her side before putting a hand on the doorknob.

“Let me know if you need anything else,” she says before she closes it. “Don’t worry about bothering me. You could never bother me.”

Maggie nods, but she knows M’gann’s going to need to get some sleep for work in the morning, so she promises herself she won’t wake her again.

Streaky curls up against her back, purring up a storm. The sound is comforting, but Maggie still can’t fall back asleep, no matter how hard she tries.

She tosses and turns for the next few hours, the dread of dealing with the day only getting increasingly worse the closer she gets to the reality. And the harder she tries to stop thinking about it and go to sleep, the worse it gets, until she’s curled up in a rigid ball, anxiety pouring off of her in waves. But no matter how many times she moves, Streaky adjusts to stay pressed up against her, no doubt sensing her distress.

Eventually, exhaustion wins over, but she’s only just managed to doze off for what feels like all of five minutes when her alarm clock goes off.

She groans, but doesn’t have the energy to reach out to turn it off, despite how grating it is to her ears. Her body is heavy and achy, and she doesn’t even think she can handle the thought of getting out of bed, let alone going to school.

After a few minutes, just as a headache starts to rear up in her temples from the unrelenting noise, the alarm shuts off. The bed dips and a hand touches her shoulder as M’gann sits beside her.

“Did you get any sleep?” she asks.

Maggie just blinks miserably up at her, shaking her head.

M’gann frowns, then places the back of her hand against Maggie’s forehead. She digs around in the first aid kit that she must have brought in with her and pulls out the thermometer.

“Let’s check your temperature. You feel a little warm.”

Maggie sticks it under her tongue and lets M’gann change the bandage on her hand. M’gann pulls the thermometer out when it beeps and pulls the blanket back up to cover Maggie.

“One hundred point four. Try to get some sleep now. I’ll call the office and let them know you’re not coming in today.”

Maggie feels everything suddenly freeze. She never considered the possibility that she wouldn’t have to go and deal with the torture of school today.

“I don’t have to go?”

M’gann shakes her head. “Even if you didn’t have a fever, I wouldn’t want you to go to school like this. It’s okay; you can stay home and rest.”

Maggie feels like a two-ton weight’s just been lifted off her shoulders. “Thank you.”

M’gann checks her watch. “Let me go see if I can catch Lucy before she leaves to let her know she doesn’t need to pick you up today.” She smooths some hair out of Maggie’s face. “Do you need anything?”

Maggie shakes her head, her eyelids getting heavy. “I think I’ll try to sleep.”

M’gann stands, and Streaky follows her out the door with a meow, demanding to be fed. “I know, I know,” M’gann says. “Still as pushy as ever, I see.”

Maggie shuts her eyes, finally feeling like she can fully relax, and she’s asleep within minutes.

She doesn’t wake up again for hours. Past one o’clock, according to her clock.

She rubs her eyes and sits up groggily. She can tell M’gann had been in to check on her recently. There’s a bottle of water, still cool, sitting on her nightstand and a note letting her know there’s lunch waiting for her in the fridge if she’s hungry.

She takes the bottle with her and gets out of bed. She’s a little unsteady on her feet, but she’s always a little disoriented when she wakes up in the middle of the day. Still, she takes her temperature again after using the bathroom. She’s still got a bit of a fever, but she feels a little better with the sleep she had gotten.

She doesn’t want to be alone right now though, so she takes the sandwich M’gann had made out of the fridge and heads downstairs. There’re two doors at the base of the stairs, one that leads to the side of the building and is technically their apartment’s “front” door, and one that leads into the back of the shop.

She opens the shop door carefully, checking to make sure there are no errant dogs on the loose. She finds Darla sitting at the desk they keep in the back with her lunch spread out before her and she can hear M’gann out at the front counter dealing with a customer. Streaky jumps down from one of the grooming tables and twines around Maggie’s ankles. Ever since they adopted her, she’s had the run of the place, loving all the attention she gets from the customers.

“Hey, there she is! How you feeling, kiddo?” Darla asks, patting the chair next to her and making space on the desk for Maggie to put her food down.

Maggie sits and shrugs, not really sure how to answer. Despite feeling better than she did that morning, she’s in no better headspace than she’s been in all week.

Darla seems to see this. “Not too great, huh?” She ruffles Maggie’s hair, causing Maggie to laugh as she tries to shove her arm out of the way. “It’s okay. Just remember you’ve got lots of people on your side now, kid. And that includes me.”

Maggie leans in for a hug. “Thanks, Darla.”

“Anytime.” Darla pats her on the back before pulling away. “Now, eat before Ms. Worrywart up there gets the chance to start fussing over you. I had to remind her twice that she doesn’t need to go upstairs to know if you’re awake or not because she is literally a mind-reader.”

Maggie thinks she’s joking, but as soon as M’gann finishes up with the customer and comes to join them in the back, she can tell she’s been worried. She feels Maggie’s forehead again and makes sure she eats and opens the water bottle for her when Maggie forgets about the cut on her hand and winces at the sting when she tries to open it herself.

Darla has two last afternoon appointments after lunch, and Maggie stays to help out despite their insistence that she can go upstairs and rest some more if she wants. She knows being alone with her thoughts isn’t what she needs right now. Right now, she just needs some distraction.

Plus, the dogs are really sweet and give her lots of kisses as she helps hold them in place as Darla works. But still, her energy is flagging by the time she helps sweep up all the shorn fur, and she knows it’s obvious by the way Darla and M’gann are eyeing her.

“You guys can head up for the night,” Darla tells them. “I’ll handle closing today.”

“You sure?” M’gann asks.

“Yeah, don’t worry about it.” Darla throws her arm around Maggie in a loose hug. “Feel better, Maggie.”

“Thanks.”

Once they get back upstairs, M’gann heads into her bedroom to shower and change. And despite knowing she probably shouldn’t go straight back to bed, Maggie does so anyway. The anxiety that had been so prevalent in the past week has now given way to a numb, hollow feeling deep in her chest, which only adds to her exhaustion. She leaves her door open and climbs on top of the covers, staring blankly at the wall beside her.

Her thoughts buzz around her head like too much static, loud and dark.

After some time, the water shuts off as M’gann gets out of the shower, and then there are various sounds as she comes out of her bedroom and moves around the house. The phone rings, the sound startling Maggie from where one of their receivers sits on her desk. It rings three times before M’gann can rush to pick it up and then the murmured sound of conversation floats from the kitchen.

M’gann knocks on her doorframe a minute later. “Hey, Alex and Lucy are on the phone. Do you want to talk to them?”

Maggie debates with herself for a beat, wanting nothing more than to talk with her girlfriends but also not trusting what might come out of her mouth if she does.

Just because she’s having a bad day doesn’t mean she has to ruin theirs.

It’s Valentine’s Day for Pete’s sake; she doesn’t need to ruin that for them any more than she already has. She’s been grumpy and pushing them away all week, telling them how much she hates Valentine’s Day, but refusing to explain why. They’re probably mad at her, or at least, they should be, for being such a bad girlfriend.

She shakes her head jerkily, not even turning to face M’gann.

M’gann comes over and sits beside her, rubbing her back. “She’s still not feeling that great,” she says into the receiver. “Mm-hmm, hold on.

“Lucy’s asking if you want them to come over.”

The desire to say yes, to have them there with her, surges in her like a desperate ache, but she bites her tongue. She can’t ruin their night, she just can’t, she can’t–

“It’s okay if you want them here, Maggie,” M’gann tells her softly, so it can’t be heard over the line. “I can tell you right now, they want nothing more than to be here with you too.”

That does it.

“Okay,” Maggie says, voice hoarse.

“Okay,” M’gann echoes a little louder into the phone. “The door’s unlocked, you can just come right up. See you soon.”

She ends the call with a beep and puts the phone down on the nightstand. “Do you need anything before they get here?”

Maggie takes a deep breath in, assessing how she feels so she can answer truthfully. It’s another thing she’s been working on with her therapist. “Maybe something to drink?”

“Water? Juice? Or we’ve still got a couple cans of ginger ale. I know that’s your favorite.”

“Ooh.” Maggie perks up a little with that. “Yes please.”

So, she’s at least sitting up, sipping from her soda when Alex and Lucy get there. Although much to her embarrassment, her chin starts to quiver as soon as they walk into her room. Lucy shuts her door quietly, giving them some privacy.

“Hey. Kara sent Krypto over,” Alex says softly, holding up the stuffed animal. “She says she thinks that the Streakys are slacking on their make-Maggie-feel-better duties.”

Maggie chuckles wetly, trying to hide her face, but she knows it’s no use. Lucy and Alex can read her like a book.

Lucy moves closer to the bed, holding out her arms. “Cuddles?” she asks.

Maggie nods and practically surges into Lucy’s arms as she joins her on the bed. Alex climbs in behind her a second later, and the three of them end up laying down, smushed together in Maggie’s twin bed. Neither one of them seems to mind, though.

Lucy wipes away Maggie’s tears with her thumb and kisses her forehead, her nose, her cheek. “Hey, Sunshine. We missed you today.”

Maggie clutches at the hem of Lucy’s shirt collar and feels Alex pressing into her back, the pressure on both sides helping to ground her. “I missed you too.”

“M’gann said you had a rough night. Was it another nightmare?” Alex asks, playing with a strand of Maggie’s hair in the way that always calms her.

“Yeah,” Maggie whispers. “But it was more than that. It’s been building up all week.”

“We could tell. We were trying to give you some space. But you can always talk to us if you want to,” Lucy says.

M’gann is the only one she’s told the full story to of her life before she came to Midvale, not including her therapist. She’s told Alex and Lucy bits and pieces, enough that they understand the gist, but she hasn’t felt ready to share all of it yet. And maybe she never will be, but right now, she needs to say this.

“Today’s the day I ran away last year,” she whispers into Lucy’s chest. “I told you guys about my friend, Eliza Wilkie. Well. I put a Valentine’s Day card in her locker asking her to the dance. And she showed it to her parents, who gave it to my parents, and when I came home from track, I saw it lying on the table and the look on my father’s face and I knew it was all over.”

Alex’s hand slips down until it’s resting over Maggie’s ribs, the same side that had been hurt all those months ago. Maggie nods, sensing Alex’s unspoken question.

“He grabbed me and threw me into the kitchen counter. I was able to get away and up to my room because my mom was trying to reason with him, but she wasn’t looking me in the eyes either. I had a bag with some clothes and stuff hidden under my bed. I think a part of me was prepared, knew it was always going to come down to that. It had only been getting worse and worse, and the older I got, the more I realized that no one else was going to protect me, no one else was going to come save me. I had to do it myself.

“So, I jumped out the window and ran as fast as I could. Ended up at the bus station on the outskirts of town. I didn’t have a plan, and there was already one of his cop buddies there, checking the buses. I hid in the bathroom, cut off all my hair, and prayed it would be enough. But I knew if I got caught on one of those buses, he would kill me. I was trying to figure out the best way to get out of there when I saw it. One of the buses that had already been loaded and that the cop had already checked. They were still loading the suitcases and stuff in the luggage compartment, but the attendant had wandered off and the doors were wide open.

“I saw my chance and I took it. Spent like two days trying not to get crushed by people’s suitcases. Didn’t even know where we were going. Got caught trying to sneak out at the rest station we stopped at here. I was lucky to get away.”

They’re both quiet for a few minutes as they take the story in, until Lucy suddenly clutches her tighter. “Oh God, Maggie. How could she just out you like that? Didn’t you say she knew about your dad? Didn’t she know what would happen?”

“I don’t know. Maybe she didn’t care what happened to me at that point. Maybe she was just as disgusted with me as my parents were. Or maybe she tried to stop her parents. I’ll never know.”

“Either way, what a bitch,” Alex says vehemently, startling Maggie. Lucy’s usually the one to curse the most out of the three of them. “I’m so sorry that happened to you, Mags.”

 Maggie closes her eyes, sinking even further into their embrace. “But it’s what brought me here. Even though it hurts, I don’t regret it. So, I don’t get why I can’t just move on and get past this. It’s just a stupid holiday. But I made myself sick thinking about dealing with it today.”

“You’re allowed to have feelings like this,” Alex tells her. “It may be just a stupid holiday, but you had something traumatic happen to you because of it. You’re allowed to hate it and you don’t have to ever get past that if you don’t want to.”

Maggie’s lip wobbles. “But that’s not fair to you guys.”

“Please tell me you’re not beating yourself up for our sakes,” Lucy says fiercely. “We don’t care about some cheesy, commercial holiday; we only care about you. Right, Alex?”

“Right. We can even celebrate some other day if you want. You know, do our own thing. But right now, all we want is to make sure you know you’re not alone. We’re right here, Maggie, and we’re going to be with you every step of the way.”

“Promise?”

“Promise,” Alex and Lucy say together.

Maggie sniffs, trying not to cry again, and failing miserably. But they hold her through it.

A knock on the door interrupts them sometime later. M’gann calls softly from the other side, “I made some dinner if you guys are hungry. There’s plenty for all of us.”

Maggie sits up. “We’ll be right there.”

Alex sits up too, reaching over to drag some of the wayward hair out of Maggie’s face. “You hungry?” she asks.

“Not really. But I feel better and I’m glad you guys are here. And maybe we can convince M’gann to let us watch a movie afterward.”

Lucy jumps up, clearing the way for the other two to get out of bed, and holding out a hand for each of them. “Sounds like the perfect way to end a sick day to me.”

Maggie takes her hand, and lets her girlfriends lead her out of her bedroom.

Maybe she’s glad she talked about it after all.

Chapter Text

Chapter Text

March 14^th, 2001

Kara knows it’s going to be a bad day from the moment she wakes up.

First of all, she has to wake up twenty minutes earlier than usual because, for the next two weeks, she has to take the bus to school instead of getting a ride from Lucy.

And sure, she knew about it before the week had started, had done it yesterday and the day before that without any problems. But it throws her off especially today, as she peers blearily at the time on her alarm and her brain tells her that she still has twenty more minutes until she’s supposed to get up.

Kara hates disruptions to her daily routine, especially on school days. Sometimes, all the mental preparation in the world just isn’t enough.

And today seems like it’s going to be one of those days.

The reason she has to take the bus in the first place is because Alex is grounded from seeing Lucy and in in-school suspension after getting into a fight with Logan, Lucy’s mean ex-boyfriend, who had also picked on Kara a couple of times in the past.

Alex would have gotten into a fight with him back then too if it wasn’t for Kara holding her back. But Kara had held her back, because kids picking on her wasn’t exactly anything new, and she didn’t want Alex to get hurt or in trouble for something that happened all the time.

It isn’t like Kara has resigned herself to the bullying either, as a frustrated Alex had accused her of back then. It’s more because Kara knows getting angry and fighting back never help anything.

She’s never talked about it much, but Earth isn’t the first planet where Kara has had to endure being picked on for being different.

They hadn’t had words for it on Krypton though. Not like here on Earth. Here, they call it autism.

Kara likes that. Having a word for it. Autistic.

It’s much better than “defect” and all the other things Kryptonian kids had often called her. But English has its derogatory terms too.

Retard. Special needs. Freak. Dimwit.

You name it; Kara’s heard it.

And after hearing them over and over again, she’s become sort of numb. But that doesn’t mean the bullying can’t still get to her at times. Or her own frustration at herself when she can’t seem to handle normal, everyday things the way everyone else seems to.

Which is why this morning starts on such a bad note.

There’s only one rule in the Danvers household on school-day mornings, as set by one Alex Danvers: Alex gets to use the bathroom first.

Kara had tried to argue about it at first – because she could literally be in and out of the bathroom faster than Alex could roll out of bed – but after fighting over it for a while and several early morning phone calls to Eliza, who usually left for work before either of them woke up and wasn’t happy to know the siblings were squabbling when she couldn’t be there, Kara had conceded to the rule just so they could stop fighting.

And no matter how unfair Kara thinks it is, she is very, very, averse to breaking a set rule.

But since Alex’s bus comes a lot later than Kara’s, she doesn’t need to be ready as early. It hasn’t been an issue so far in the week, as Alex had woken up because of Kara’s alarm and beaten her to the bathroom anyway. But today, Alex’s door is still closed when Kara walks out into the hallway.

Which means Kara hovers outside the bathroom, uncertain about what to do.

Alex gets the bathroom first unless she’s not here. It’s a Rule. I can’t break the rules. But I can’t go downstairs yet either. I have to brush my teeth and comb my hair first. But I can’t go in the bathroom yet because Alex isn’t –

An uncomfortable feeling starts up in her fingers the longer she stands there: a tingling sensation, almost like an itch she can’t scratch. It starts traveling up her arms, so she shakes them out. It makes her feel a little better, but the relief is short-lived, because she’s still standing in the hallway, unable to move until she makes a decision on what to do.

 She’s finally saved from her self-inflicted stasis when Alex comes out of her room. She mumbles a good morning under her breath as she blearily pushes past Kara and into the bathroom, shutting the door. Kara doesn’t blame her for being a little grumpy; she would be too if she had her whole school week disrupted by suspension too.

But because of how long she spent doing nothing, by the time Kara makes it downstairs for breakfast, she has about three minutes until her bus is supposed to come. She panics, grabbing some granola bars from the pantry and rushing to the door, snagging her backpack off the hook on the way.

Three minutes is not enough time to make it to the bus stop two blocks away from her house, not when she’s supposed to be walking there at a very normal, very human, speed.

She panics even further. She’s not going to make it in time, and then she’ll miss the bus, and then she’ll be late to school, and then she’ll get in trouble and then –

She needs to stay calm. Her powers are even harder to control when she’s worked up. She takes a deep breath, in and out.

But then the bus pulls up to the stop when she’s still a block away and the kids waiting start getting on. Of course, it would be early today; it’s just her luck.

Kara lets herself break into what she hopes is a totally normal running speed as she starts waving her arms for the driver to wait. She knows from experience that the driver doesn’t expect her to ever be there after getting so many rides to school, so she has to make sure she’s seen or else the bus will pull away without her.

Thankfully, the driver sees her and opens the doors back up when Kara leaps off the curb. She even remembers to pretend to be winded from the exertion as she takes her seat, so she counts that as a win.

But the tingling in her arms, amplified by the anxiety of almost being late, doesn’t go away. Kara spends the entire ride trying to ignore it.

Then she gets to school. Her first class after homeroom is math.

She’s supposedly in the “advanced” math track, but Kara would like to beg to differ. Not even what Alex is learning in her grade can hold a candle to the level of math Kara was doing back on Krypton.

 She still likes helping Alex out with her homework though. But as for her math class, she tends to just daydream through the entire thing, much to her teacher’s chagrin. No one can complain when Kara gets perfect scores on all her work, however, so she’s mostly left alone.

Then comes science. Another class that bores her to physical tears. Her knowledge of science is so far ahead of Earth’s that it’s physically painful to have to pretend to not know what the human race still hasn’t figured out yet.

Kara zones out through most of that class too.

Her third class of the day, art, is usually something that brightens her spirits, especially since they’ve been working on a painting unit lately. But today, the effort it takes to not put the paintbrush through the canvas she’s working on and to screw and unscrew the caps of the fragile tubes of paint without making them explode leaves Kara physically exhausted.

They do a short story unit in English; a class Kara normally enjoys. But today, she finds herself unable to focus on anything as her teacher reads out loud. She has to give up her pretense of following along in the book as the smooth texture of the textbook pages suddenly becomes repulsive to her fingers.

She shoves the book away from her without thinking about it. It flies off her desk and across the room, and Kara not only has to suffer the embarrassment of causing a disturbance in class, but she also has to stand up and get it when she fails to give the teacher an explanation for what had happened, drawing even more attention to herself.

Lunch goes by and only adds to her stress levels. The hustle and bustle in the cafeteria overwhelm her and every little thing starts to irritate her. The scrape of her fork on her plate, the way the bench she’s sitting on digs into the back of her knees, the constant noise of kids talking and laughing; everything.

And then comes the worst possible class Kara could have on a day like today.

Gym.

It’s bad enough on days where she isn’t on the verge of losing it completely, every minute of the class period spent laser-focused on controlling her strength, her speed, her movements. But today? Today it’s going to be torture.

She thinks about going to the nurse and claiming to be sick, but she’s supposed to get permission from a teacher before she does that, and she knows she’ll never get it from her gym teacher.

Mr. Payne.

(And yes, Kara understands the irony.)

Mr. Payne is a no-nonsense, towering hulk of a man who never lets anyone get away with anything in his class. Kara’s not sure why someone like him would ever want to be a middle school teacher, because he can’t possibly be doing it for his love of children.

She’s tried to get out of gym before with no success because of him. And what drives her crazy is that there are two gym teachers, Mr. Payne and Ms. Smith, who are as opposite as opposite can be. (Ms. Smith, who Kara has decided from their brief locker room interactions and her spying from the other side of the gym when they’re split into two groups, is one of the nicest people in the world and would surely be a lot more sympathetic towards Kara’s plight if only she were Kara’s teacher.)

But no, due to the fact that all gym classes are split in half alphabetically by last name, and the first half just so happened to get assigned to Mr. Payne at the beginning of the year, Kara is stuck with someone who Alex once described as “the literal actual devil.”

But as she walks into the locker room to get changed for class, she’s filled with the overwhelming foreboding that today is going to be especially bad. So, she decides to try her luck, heading to Ms. Smith’s office.

She’s pretty early to class, not many people in the locker room yet. The office door is partially open, so she clears her throat instead of knocking. She doesn’t trust herself to not dent the metal door, not with the way her hands are shaking.

Thankfully, Ms. Smith hears her. “Oh, Kara, come on in. What’s up?”

“Um,” Kara steps into the office and tries to make eye contact. She fails miserably, which she knows is not going to help her case. “I wanted to know if I could go to the nurse. I’m not– I don’t feel well.”

Ms. Smith looks at her a little more carefully. Kara is well-known for asking to be excused from gym, unfortunately. “What’s going on?”

“I don’t–” Kara fidgets on the spot. “I don’t know. I just don’t feel right.”

It’s the truth, as accurate as she can put into words right now. She doesn’t feel right – everything feels wrong, from the way her hair is lying on her head to the way the fabric of her shirt is laying over her stomach to how tightly her sneakers are tied.

“Can you give me a little more than that? Do you have a headache?”

Kara shakes her head.

“Stomachache? Do you feel like you’re getting sick? Are you in any pain?”

No. No. No.

Sometimes, Kara wishes she were better at lying to authority figures. Or just in general.

“I can’t just send you to the nurse for no reason, Kara. I need to know what’s going on.”

What’s going on is that if you make me go out there, I’m probably going to put my foot through the floor or knock someone out with a jump rope or just start screaming and screaming and screaming until I can’t stop, Kara thinks. But she can’t say that out loud, so she just stays silent.

Ms. Smith sighs. “Look, if it gets any worse, let Mr. Payne know, okay?” She offers Kara what she probably thinks is a reassuring smile. “We’re going to have an easy day anyway, so it shouldn’t be too hard on you.”

Kara nods in weary acceptance, moving back out of the office. “Okay, thank you.”

She’s doomed.

But she goes over to her locker and opens it up anyway, pulling out her gym uniform and placing her bag inside. She takes off her shirt and pulls the uniform t-shirt over her head, then kicks off her shoes so she can pull off her jeans. The shirt tag scrapes the back of her neck as she pulls on her shorts, the sensation causing her whole body to shiver like it’s actually painful.

She reaches up to the back of her neck instinctively and yanks on the offending object before she can even think. Ends up tearing the entire neckline of her t-shirt off completely, tag and all.

Kara slips it over her head and blinks down at it in her hand, the o of fabric mocking her. She’s lucky she didn’t tear her shirt right off, but as she looks at what’s left in the mirror across from her, she realizes that this is hardly better. The shirt still has enough fabric to stay on her shoulders and cover everything it’s supposed to, but she looks ridiculous, like she had tried to DIY a crop top but gotten the memo wrong and cut off the wrong end.

It’s the only gym shirt she has with her though, the others sitting at home in her laundry pile. And maybe she really shouldn’t care about her grade in gym of all classes, but she doesn’t want the docked points she knows she’ll get it if she shows up in line in a non-uniform shirt.

So, she just closes her locker and walks out into the gym, figuring she should just get the day over with already. At least she won’t have to deal with the tag bothering her all period.

But she still has to deal with everything else, and as she walks to her designated spot in the attendance line, the end of her ponytail brushes against her neck, just as it had been doing all day, but suddenly Kara can’t stand it. She quickly stuffs it into her hair tie and attempts a misshapen bun, not caring how bad it looks as she makes it over to her spot in line.

Her arms fall against her sides as she stops moving, their normal resting place, but that’s bad too – the contact with her own skin too intense, even through her clothes. Her hands start tingling again and the feeling spreads up her arms, and she has to flap them out to try to stop it.

It gives her a split second of relief. So, she flaps harder, and harder; two, three, four times, her whole body jerking with the motion.

She feels a lot better and comes to a stop, standing with her arms held out a little to the sides so they don’t make contact again.

Snickers erupt from the other end of the gym and Kara can’t help but overhear it as three girls start whispering about her as they make their way to the line. She grits her teeth and tries to ignore it, but her shoulders slump as she hears one of them ask how they let someone “like her” in the normal classes with the rest of them.

“Hi, Kara.”

Kara turns to see her friend Sam fall into line next to her, smiling brightly at her.

Sam is one of Kara’s only friends in this class, and although the two of them didn’t know each other before this and don’t share any other classes, they’ve become friends in the way that can only come about by having no one else to talk to on the first day. Sam always asks to be Kara’s partner and never seems to care about Kara’s dismal performance in any of the activities they do. She’s become the one saving grace about gym, to Kara’s eyes.

Kara smiles back at her. “Hi.”

Sam takes in her appearance, tilting her head slightly. “What happened to your shirt?”

Kara’s saved from having to answer by a piercing whistle, as the last couple of kids trickle out of the boy’s locker room. Kara’s entire jaw clenches at the noise, and the few students who were goofing off in line snap to attention.

Mr. Payne, always the last to leave the locker room to make sure no stragglers stay behind, walks to his end of the line, clipboard in hand, and starts taking attendance. Ms. Smith does the same on her end, albeit in a much nicer manner.

Kara looks down at the floor when Mr. Payne steps in front of her, mouth going dry.

“Danvers,” he greets her roughly. “This some kind of teenage rebellion or something?”

“Um, no, it just– um, it ripped and I didn’t have–”

He circles something on the clipboard and cuts her off. “That will be a zero for the dress code for the day. Make sure you have a spare set of clothes from now on. Don’t let it happen again.”

And with that, he moves on to Sam.

Kara feels tears well up in her eyes, although again, she honestly doesn’t know why she even cares. It’s not like her grade in middle school gym is ever going to matter, but even knowing that doesn’t take the sting out of being reprimanded.

Sometimes, she just wants to show all the teachers like him, show everyone here who’s ever mocked her, what she can really do; how fast she can really run, and how far she can throw literally anything, and how much smarter she is than they think, how her knowledge of mathematics and science and the universe as a whole could put their puny excuses for education to shame and –

But she can’t.

She has to fit in.

Has to be normal.

Has to let it go.

She blows out a sharp breath through her nose, trying to shake off her anger.

Meanwhile, Mr. Payne and Ms. Smith are coming together in front of them, explaining what they’re going to be doing that day. Kara continues to zone out, only coming back to attention when Sam nudges her with an elbow.

“So, what do you want to do?” Seeing the puzzled look on Kara’s face, and understanding that she sometimes has a hard time paying attention, Sam adds, “We have two choices today, tennis outside or dodgeball in here.”

Kara weighs the pros and cons of both activities quickly, although it’s not much of a contest. Tennis is a no-go today. She can just imagine how quickly she would break the racket, not to mention how fellow students, the net, the fence, and probably the court itself would all be in jeopardy.

At least with dodgeball, she can just purposedly get out early in the game.

So, she and Sam stay inside while the students who chose tennis follow Ms. Smith outside. Her relief at having a solid plan for the game even outweighs the fact that she’s stuck with Mr. Payne for another period.

And it’s a plan she follows to a T as soon as they split up into teams and begin playing. Kara ignores the rush of students scrambling to get one of the balls waiting on the middle line, watching the other side for her chance.

She spots a kid on the other team who managed to grab two balls, makes eye contact, and feels a spark of triumph when he grins at the easy target laid out in front of him.

The ball hits her in the stomach with what would most likely be unsportsmanlike force had she been anyone else.

Kara doesn’t even flinch, forgetting to pretend to bend with the impact, and steps happily off to the sidelines, the first one out on her team.

Payne blows his whistle and points at the kid who hit her. “Drew, knock it off with the baseball pitch. We’re not having any injuries today.” Then he turns to Kara. “Danvers, that was pathetic. At least put some effort into it next time.”

Kara’s mood sours again. Then it sinks even further as someone on her team catches a ball and motions for her to come back in.

Ah, right. Forgot about that rule.

Feeling her teacher’s eyes on her this time, Kara focuses on just dodging. It’s a piece of cake, and after a few minutes, Kara starts actually having some fun, especially when she notices how mad the other team is getting because no one can hit her.

But her amusement dies out quickly when she hears her name being called, and she looks around and realizes that she’s the only one left on her team.

“Catch one!” several kids on her team are urging her, eager for a chance to get back in the game. “You can do it!”

And Kara figures she can at least do that since she doesn’t want to risk hurting anyone if she were to try and throw anything. So, when a ball goes whizzing by her head, Kara reaches up and effortlessly snags it out of the air with one hand.

Her team breaks out in a cheer, and the first person in line runs back into the game and immediately scoops up a ball. Kara drops the ball she’s holding and catches another one, feeling triumphant at the way her teammates are suddenly cheering for her.

But then someone on the other team takes a running dive to avoid being hit while scooping up another ball, sneakers squeaking loudly on the floor. The noise cuts through Kara’s ears like a knife, and she’s suddenly all too aware of every single sensation her body is experiencing.

How tight her hair feels in her ponytail, the ripped edges of fabric against her throat, the way one sock is slightly higher on one ankle than the other–

There’s a ball in her hands. She can feel every ridge in the rubber texture underneath her fingertips. It feels like they’re burning her.

It’s too much. It’s all too much.

She’s going to scream, she needs to scream, needs somebody to understand the way she just needs everything to stop right now, or else she’ll–

A ball hits her in the legs right at that moment, interrupting her spiral. Two things happen then:

1. the whistle blows as the game is called – Kara once again the last one left on her team – and
2. the ball in her hands pops with such force that the air knocks her glasses askew.

The sudden noise startles everyone, herself included, and it feels like every eye in the room turns to Kara at the exact moment she looks down at the shredded rubber in her fingers and bursts into tears.

Sam comes running over almost instantly. “Kara, are you okay? Did you get hurt?”

Kara shakes her head, trying to choke out an apology through her sobs, and starts rocking in place. “I’m sorry; I didn’t mean it. I didn’t mean to break it. I’m sorry.”

It only gets worse when Mr. Payne comes over too, Kara frantically trying to apologize more so she doesn’t get in trouble. Sam guides her over to the sidelines while their teacher gets the other students back on track and starts up another game.

“You don’t need to apologize,” Mr. Payne tells her when he comes back over, speaking kindly for one of the first times she can remember. “The ball must have been really worn out if it popped like that, and we’ve got plenty more where that came from. Shake it off, kid. You can sit this one out if you want.”

Before he walks away to ref the game, he puts a hand on her shoulder in what she knows is supposed to be a reassuring gesture. But Kara’s entire body zeroes in on the contact, her skin feeling like it’s on fire beneath her shirt, like thousands of needles are being jabbed into her skin where his hand was, even after he pulls it away.

It’s so profound that Kara instantly and abruptly stops crying, the rest of her body feeling like it’s going into shock at the sensation.

She has to get out of there. Now.

“Are you okay?” Sam asks again.

Kara forces her head to nod, up and down, and then strains with the effort it takes to make her throat produce sound.

“Tell him I needed to go to the bathroom if he asks, please.”

She doesn’t stay long enough to see if Sam responds, marching like a marionette to the locker room at the slowest pace she can manage right now. The tingling sensation that she’d felt previously in her arms starts up again, but this time over her whole body. And yet, she feels oddly detached from it, numb almost, as she opens her locker and puts her non-ripped shirt back on.

She doesn’t bother changing the rest of her clothes, doesn’t bother to take her stuff out of her locker, just closes everything inside and puts the lock back on. She’ll have to come back for her backpack later, but that’s a problem for future Kara.

Right now, her only concern is getting out of school, going somewhere where she can break down in private. Because she knows a breakdown is coming, knows this sudden numb feeling isn’t going to last much longer.

She makes a mental note to apologize later for using her powers so openly, and then she just.

Runs.

As fast as she can.

Faster than anyone could ever see her, even on the cameras, out of the gym and out of the school and away from the parking lot they share with the high school.

In the split second it takes her to get outside, Kara debates where she should go.

She can’t go home because Eliza’s still at work, and she can’t bother her at work, and she doesn’t trust herself to be alone right now.

She obviously can’t go to Alex, who’s still stuck in school.

Maybe she could find Maggie? But no, she’s not really sure what Maggie gets up to during the day when everybody else is in school, and Maggie hasn’t seen her have a meltdown like this yet. Kara doesn’t want to scare her.

This leaves only one option, and Kara just hopes the shop isn’t too busy right now, that she isn’t going to be a bother.

She zips across town and to the dumpster behind M’gann’s building. It takes two seconds, maybe three, and she uses her super-hearing and pulls her glasses down far enough to use her x-ray vision to make sure the coast is clear before she comes to a stop. Then she forces herself to walk at a normal pace around the building to the front, pausing just outside.

She doesn’t trust herself to touch the handle, much less open the fragile glass door. She can hear M’gann and Darla inside, but they’re around the corner at the grooming stations, no one near the waiting area at the front desk to see her.

She just needs to be patient, but it’s easier said than done right now. The numb feeling had completely dissipated in the breeze as she used her super-speed, and now it feels like her whole body is being consumed by static from the inside out.

If she could just shake it away, maybe she could – but no, she could destroy the street around her if she tries, she has to stay still, stay still –

Kara bites her lip, and forces herself to focus on rocking as she waits, back and forth and back and forth and back and forth and back and forth and–

It doesn’t take too long, even if it feels like an eternity. The phone rings at the front desk and M’gann rushes over to get it. She picks up, happening to glance outside as she answers, and her gaze locks on Kara. Her eyes go wide, and she holds up one finger as she hurries to finish up the phone call.

Just a minute, Kara thinks. Just a minute, just one more minute, just hang on one more minute.

M’gann rushes to open the door as soon as she can. “Kara, what are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be in school?” she asks in shock, but her voice is pitched low, in a way that tells Kara she can already guess what’s going on.

Which is good, because Kara can’t answer anyway. She had forced herself to say that last sentence to Sam and those were all the words she had left in her for now. Her tongue is heavy in her mouth and the effort it would take to make more is just too great. She just can’t.

M’gann ushers her inside, taking in the way Kara’s fists are clenched tightly at her sides, knuckles trembling under the force. This is not going to be one of those days where it would help to practice petting or playing with the dogs.

“Darla,” M’gann calls out, catching the other woman’s attention, whose eyes go wide when she rounds the corner and sees Kara straining to hold still. “Can you handle things down here on your own for a while?”

Darla nods. Whispers, “Brian’s coming in for the afternoon anyway. He should be here soon. You go.”

M’gann doesn’t need to be told twice, turning her entire focus onto Kara. “Let’s go upstairs, okay?”

Kara hesitates, already calculating the exact force she’ll need to go up the stairs to M’gann’s apartment without breaking anything. She doesn’t think she can do it, doesn’t think she can do anything right right now, and she pounds her closed fist against her thigh in frustration as tears blur her vision. The action brings pain, but also some relief, so she does it again, and again, and ag–

“Hey, hey.” M’gann is kneeling in front of her. “Would it help if I carried you?”

Kara pauses, thinking it over. When she nods, M’gann sits back on her heels and opens her arms, letting Kara come to her.

Kara wraps her arms around M’gann’s neck and her legs around her hips as M’gann stands, not even the slightest bit embarrassed at being picked up like a child. It feels nice actually, and she buries her tear-stained face in M’gann’s neck as they move out of the grooming shop and up the stairs to the second story.

M’gann stops in the living room, and Kara puts her feet on the floor, still shaking. She crouches down, letting go of M’gann completely, then sits on the carpet with her arms wrapped tight around her knees, pulling them to her chest.

She starts rocking again, letting the motion soothe her, but it’s not enough. She has a strange feeling in her jaw, the need to sink her teeth into something. She turns her head to the side and bites down on her bicep.

Finally, the relief she’s been seeking. Her brain focuses on the pain in her arm, all other sensations forgotten. She shifts so she can move her mouth down to her forearm, and that’s even better because she can bite down on the skin on the side of her arm. It hurts less than biting muscle, and she can hold it longer. Pretty soon, there are bite marks all over her arm, though they disappear pretty quickly in the sunlight filtering in from behind the curtains.

But then she sees M’gann crouching in front of her again. This time she’s holding out a leather wallet, motioning that she wants Kara to take it. Kara zones back in enough to make out her words.

“Can you bite this for me instead, Kara? Please.”

M’gann is always looking for ways to help redirect Kara when she starts hurting herself. Kara is pretty sure M’gann knows that she doesn’t mean to, that sometimes it’s the only thing that she can think to do, the only thing that stops her from hurting everything else around her. But M’gann has a really patient way of trying to help her find other outlets when it gets really bad like this, so Kara unlatches her teeth from her arm and takes the wallet, trusting her.

But when she brings it up to her mouth, she hesitates, looking to M’gann for explicit permission.

“It’s okay,” M’gann says soothingly. “It’s old and there’s nothing in it. I don’t need it anymore; I promise.”

Kara bites down on it, teeth sinking into leather. It doesn’t taste very good, but it does the job. She quickly realizes that if she bites any harder, she’ll go clean through the thing, and she doesn’t want that. So, she lets her jaw relax slightly, and then, just like that, the overwhelming urge to bite something is over.

She spits the wallet out and wipes her mouth on her arm. M’gann is still watching her. She smiles when she sees Kara looking her way.

“Anything else you need?” she asks.

Kara points at the couch, at one of the pillows. M’gann passes it over. Kara lays it on the floor in front of her and then lays down on it, face first, bringing her knees up underneath her and her arms over her head until she’s curled into a tight ball.

She hears more than sees M’gann stand. “I’ll be over at the table if you need anything else, okay? I’m going to let Eliza know where you are.”

Kara nods slightly. She doesn’t intend to move for a while. She lets her muscles relax as much as they’re able with the way she’s curled up, arms going slack against the pillow and feet against the floor.

She doesn’t think about anything, letting her mind zone out.

Her eyes close, and eventually she dozes off, exhausted from everything that’s happened.

She wakes up groggy and disoriented, forgetting where she is. She’s laid out on the floor, head on a pillow and a blanket draped over her. Her ears zero in on what’s going on around her and she remembers – M’gann’s. She doesn’t know how long it’s been since she fell asleep, but Eliza and M’gann are sitting at the table, talking.

“I’m just glad she came to you,” Eliza is saying. “The school called me almost immediately after you did. I would have had no idea what to tell them otherwise.”

Kara stands up, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. The two women brighten instantly when they see she’s awake.

Eliza pats the chair next to her, inviting Kara over to the table. “How are you feeling, sweetie?”

Kara smiles in answer and sits down. She feels better, better than she had all day. She accepts the glass of lemonade M’gann pours for her from the pitcher in the center of the table. Chugs most of it down in one go.

“You ready to head home? I was thinking we could order from Spring Garden tonight for dinner.”

Kara nods eagerly at the mention of one of her favorite restaurants. But she has to thank M’gann before they leave, so she stands up again, barreling into M’gann for a hug.

M’gann ruffles her hair, squeezing right back. “You know you can always come to me for anything,” she reminds her. “No thanks needed. I’m just glad you’re feeling better.”

Kara grins, giving her one last squeeze and a wave, then follows Eliza outside to the car.

The ride home passes in a blur. She’s still pretty tired and doesn’t feel like talking. Eliza tells her she’ll call to order their food and then go pick it up as soon as Alex gets home. Kara acknowledges this and then goes up to her room, debating for a second about what she should do. Then she just lets her body drop to the floor and crawl under her bed.

The enclosed space is comforting to her sometimes and it’s what she needs right now. She stretches out on her stomach, letting one cheek press into the carpet, and just

lies there.

She’s broken out of her trance sometime later by the door creaking open, Alex’s head popping into view upside-down, hair skimming the floor as she checks to see if Kara’s there.

“Hey,” Alex says softly. “Mom went to get dinner. She said you had a bad day. Sorry. Do you want some company?”

Kara sticks her arm out from underneath the bed, tapping her hand twice against the floor in what she hopes Alex will take as a gesture of yes, please.

Alex comes over and sits down nearby, back against the bedframe. She shuffles for a moment, arranging her legs in a comfortable position, and then, “Will it bother you if I play my Game Boy?”

Alex isn’t supposed to play any video games while she’s grounded, but Kara’s not going to point that out. She smiles even though Alex can’t see it and gives her a thumbs-up.

They stay like that for a while, the only sound the push of buttons as Alex plays with the volume off.

At some point, Kara realizes she can come out from under the bed. She’s getting hungry and she knows Eliza will be home with dinner soon. But first, she spots the yellow color of Alex’s Game Boy cartridge as she crawls back into the open.

“Are you playing the Pikachu game?”

Alex jumps, so absorbed in the game that she hadn’t seen Kara. She bites down on the expletive she was clearly about to say, trying to control her reaction for Kara’s sake. “Y-yeah. Yellow.”

Kara sits cross-legged next to Alex. “I want to watch!”

“Okay, okay,” Alex laughs, angling the screen so they can both see. Then she pauses. “Just don’t tell Mom.”

Kara mimes pulling a zipper across her mouth as she watches Alex’s avatar walk around with Pikachu following behind. She loves this game for that exact reason. Her lips are sealed.

Maybe it isn’t a completely bad day after all.