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Bog sniffles down the urge to cry as he gazes fondly at his wife-to-be as the minister drones on in the prescribed manner. It's finally happening and everything is absolutely perfect!

So many times they've come very close to not making it but here they are. The gleaming amber eyes gazing fondly into his misty blues reassures him that this isn't a dream.

This day couldn't get any better.

"...and now by the power...," the minister drawls.

"I object!"

Bog blinks out of his daze and turns toward the aisle, groaning at the familiar visage of Roland Greendale walking past the front pews. Now what is he up to this time? A question shared by nearly all in attendance.

"You can't! I mean, I've already called for objections and you're too late," the minister remarks, pulling at his collar slightly.

"It's never too late to save my princess!" Roland protests. "Buttercup, you don't have to marry that hideous cockroach! I know you're only doing it because you need a man to take care of you but I'm here now and we can finally get married like we planned!"

Bog blinks again as the small hands in his grip disappears and Marianne turns to the blonde actor with an adoring look on her face.

"Oh, Roland!" Marianne sighs fondly, curling her hands against her face.

"I knew you'd like the romantic gesture and such, babydoll," Roland comments, holding his hand out toward her. "So, here am I, proving my eternal love for you."

"And we'll live happily ever after, right?" Marianne questions cutely.

"Of course! It's just like the movies!" Roland explains.

Cringing as Marianne takes Roland's hand as she walks closer to him, Bog closes his eyes to the loving scene. Just like a lamb to the slaughter. He's so unsuspecting, so trusting, so naive, so foolish!

"Oh, Roland!" Marianne coos again.

A high-pitched scream echoes through the large building and Bog's hands automatically move to cover his crotch, despite knowing he's in no danger. The poor fool probably didn't even notice her dress move before her knee connected. Sounded like she managed to get pretty close, too.

He snickers as he opens his eyes again and notices the marriage book now covering the horror-stricken minister's lap as a bawling Roland clutches his pained jewels while rolling into a fetal position on the floor. Bog notes with pride that all male members of the wedding congregation take a defensive position themselves as Marianne turns murderous eyes toward their friends and relatives.

That's my girl!

"I told you something would happen but no, you insisted on a wedding! You should have let me and Bog elope!" Marianne growls before pointing to the terrified minister. "As for you, I told you what would happen if you put that stupid line in and anyone objected!"

"I now pronounce you husband and wife!" the minister quickly yells as the killer bride stalks closer. "You may now keep the bride from castrating me!"

And they all lived happily ever after...except Roland but he really didn't need to sire any kids anyway.

Tea Blend.