Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

`Her breast is fit for pearls,
But I was not a 'Diver' -
Her brow is fit for thrones
But I have not a crest.
Her heart is fit for home-
I - a Sparrow - build there
Sweet of twigs and twine
My perennial nest.’
Emily Dickinson

Most people would assume the worst part of being a baker is having to wake up hours before dawn, but they would be wrong. When you’re regularly up at 4:00 in the morning, you get to experience the world in a different way. How can anyone think they truly know the city they live in until they’ve seen it slowly shake itself awake under the pink light of the rising sun?
Before Ali had taken over at the bakery, she had been previously acquainted with the early morning hours, but in a very different way. When she went to Penn State, there had been several nights where she’d stumbled out of the library as the sun came up, stomach churning from bad coffee and nerves over upcoming finals. And of course, there had been the handful of times when she’d gone out with friends, only to be part of the drunk, stumbling crowd that she would now roll her eyes and laugh at as she drove to work.
It was different now. Even if she’d stayed up too late watching Netflix, leaving her yawning and grouchy as she unlocked the back door to the bakery, 5:00 am felt like home.
She switched on all of the lights and started reviewing her to do list for the day. She would get the first batches of the day started: loaves of bread, dozens of cookies and bars, slabs of cheesecake, everything needed to keep the customers of Patty Cakes satisfied and coming back for more, just as they had been doing for fifty-five years.
“Good morning!”
Ali stretched around the corner to see Alex peeling off her jacket by the door. “You’re late. Again,” she teased gently.
Alex gave her a sheepish grin. “I know, I’m sorry. It’s just that when Servando is home, it’s impossible to get out of bed. I look over and see him and just wanna crawl on top of him and-”
“I get the picture,” Ali assured her. “Jesus, you two are like rabbits. I thought him knocking you up would help things simmer down.”
Alex patted her slightly rounded stomach. “I wish. If anything, my hormones have me so out of control that I don’t know what to do with myself.”
“Well I’m glad you were able to take time out of your crazy sex life to come to work.”
Alex stuck out her tongue. “It’s only 5:10.”
“Well you know Miss Patty’s philosophy: ‘Better an hour too soon, than a minute too late,’” Ali parroted in an exaggerated Southern drawl.
Alex playfully bumped her with her hip as she walked past. “Well thank god you’re in charge and not your Meemaw.”
“Thankfully,” Ali grinned back. It had been two years since her grandmother had fully turned the bakery over to her, and she was proud of the work she had done. She had poured her heart and soul into the business, and it showed.
She let herself get lost in the ebb and flow of the kitchen. She mixed, kneaded, and pounded away until sweat began to drip from her hairline, her muscles luxuriating in the familiar movements. Before she knew it, four hours had flown by and it was time to unlock the front door. She walked through to the front and saw Christen sipping away at her latte as she counted the money in the register.
“Morning, Chris.” The younger girl gave her a smile and a wave as she finished flipping through the one-dollar bills. “I didn’t see you come in.”
“You and Alex were busy bickering over the pumpernickel.”
Ali flipped the open sign over and unlocked the door. “Sounds about right.” She walked over to her front of shop manager. “What’s on the agenda for today?”
“Nothing too crazy… we have the cookie order for Becky Sauerbrunn, we told her they would be ready by two pm.”
“Yeah, I have that written on the board in the back. Okay, sounds good!” She began to walk back to the kitchen.
“Oh wait!” She turned back to Christen, who handed her the scheduling binder. “You have a consultation for a wedding at 2:30, the name is Megan Rapinoe.”
“Oh, I’d forgotten that was today.” She quickly looked over the sheet. “Did she mention if it was going to be just her, or is the fiancé coming?”
Christen shrugged. “She didn’t specify either way.”
“Okay.” She began to walk back towards the kitchen before turning back around. “Oh I didn’t even ask, how was your weekend off?”
She didn’t miss the way a blush quickly spread over her cheeks. “It was… good. Great. Fine.”
Ali cocked an eyebrow. “Good, great, and fine?”
“Yup.” The bell over the door chimed as the first customer walked in. “Hi, welcome to Patty Cakes!” Christen sang out, obviously happy for the interruption. Ali walked back to the kitchen, making a mental note to pry more information out of her later
X
Ali methodically wiped down the work counters, her head bobbing along to the music coming out of the old stereo on the windowsill. Becky Sauerbrunn had been thrilled with her cookies when she picked them up and had promised to pass along their info to any of her friends who were in need of baked goods for an event.
“Ali?” Christen’s head popped through the door. “Your 2:30 is here.” She nodded and threw the rag in the sink, wiping her hands on a tea towel before following Christen to the front. She grabbed the binder and approached the couple standing next to one of the display cases.
“Megan?” The shorter of the two turned around. Her hair was bleached almost white blonde, but her brown eyes were full of warmth.
“Hey! That’s me.” She stuck out her hand for Ali to shake. “Are you Patty?”
Ali laughed, taking her hand. “Close. I’m Ali Krieger. I’m the lead baker.”
“Nice to meet you. Oh, this is Ashlyn, she’s gonna be part of my wedding party.” Ali shifted to look at her and felt something heavy settle in her stomach.
She had short brown hair, neatly shaved on the sides. Her mouth was set in a grin underneath intense hazel eyes that Ali found herself sinking into. When she finally made herself snap into action and shake Ashlyn’s hand, her eyes couldn’t help but drink in the intricate tattoos on her forearms, and found herself wanting to know exactly how far they extended-
Get ahold of yourself, Krieger.
“Hi,” she managed.
“Nice to meet you.”
“Maid of honor?” Ali couldn’t help but ask.
“I don’t know that anyone would describe me that way,” Ashlyn cracked, and Ali smiled. “No, I’m filling in. Pinoe’s twin sister couldn’t make it today.”
“I see.” Ali forced herself to take a breath and return her focus to Megan. “Why don’t you guys come sit down and we’ll get down to business then. Can I get you anything to drink?”
Megan shook her head and both women lifted up iced coffees. “I think we would explode.”
“I can already see sounds,” Ashlyn added.
Ali couldn’t help but laugh. “Never mind then.” She pulled a piece of paper out of the binder and pulled a pencil from where it had been shoved into her bun. “So first things first: when’s the wedding and bridal shower?”
“The bridal shower is in two months, with the wedding three months later, on January 25th.”
“Late winter weddings can be beautiful.”
“That’s what we’re hoping anyways.” Megan flashed a toothy grin. “My fiancé is worried that we’ll get snowed out, but I have faith.”
Ali made a note on Megan’s sheet and gave her a smile. “Tell me more about your groom.”
Megan and Ashlyn shared a quick look. “Uh… It’s a bride, actually. Two brides.”
“Oh! That…” She couldn’t stop her eyes from sweeping over Megan’s appearance, truly taking her in this time. That makes sense, she finished in her mind.
Megan raised an eyebrow. “Is that going to be a problem?” Her voice had been friendly and upbeat so far, but Ali could hear the bite starting to seep into it, as if she was prepping herself for a fight.
“Oh my god, no! Of course not, that doesn’t… we don’t care if…” She took a deep breath. “I mean, my brother’s gay,” she offered up lamely. Embarrassment colored her cheeks, and she fought the urge to cover her face with her hands as they both stared at her. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed either way.”
Megan gave her a smile, shrugging her shoulders. “You’re fine.”
“So, tell me about your bride.”
And with that, Megan launched into a speech about her fiancée, Sue, nearly tripping over her own words in her rush to talk about the woman she loved. Ali listened intently, making notes as she spoke, but every now and then her eyes would dart back over to Ashlyn of their own accord. The third time it happened, the other woman caught her staring and smirked back at her. As she did, Ali noticed for the first time that she had a deep dimple in one of her cheeks, and her stomach gave a strange lurch as if she had missed a step going down the stairs.
“So, did you have any ideas going forward about what flavors you might want for the cake?”
“All of them,” Ashlyn quipped, and Megan gave her a playful shove.
“Okay money bags, how many of these cakes are you paying for?”
“Ali here seems like a great person, I’m sure she could cut us a deal.”
“Ignore her, she’s just a giant four-year-old.”
“Hey, you invited me!”
“Wrong, you invited yourself.” Megan turned her attention back to Ali. “I like most cakes. But Sue loves smores, I was wondering if you had something that tasted similar?”
“We have a few ways we could go on the cake, but for the bridal shower, we do have a smores cupcake that always brings down the house.”
Megan threw her hands up in the air. “Oh my god. Excellent. I’m gonna be the best wifey ever.”
Ali laughed. “I don’t doubt that.” She flipped to the calendar portion of the binder. “I would love to set up a tasting session for you and Sue.”
“Does that mean I’m not invited?”
Ali glanced up to catch Ashlyn’s teasing smile. “You’re welcome to come back anytime.”
“Anytime? Maybe I’ll take you up on that.”
Ali cleared her throat and quickly looked back at the calendar. “But for you and Sue’s tasting… How does the 2nd of October sound? Same time, 2:30?”
“Sounds great!”
“You better write that down or you’ll never remember. Actually, I’ll text Sue right now.” Ashlyn stood up and pulled her phone out of her pocket.
“Rude!” Megan rolled her eyes and smiled at Ali. “Can you believe how little faith this one has in me?”
Ali grinned. “If you want, I can also send an email reminder to both of you the week of, just to make sure it doesn’t slip anyone’s mind.”
Megan gave a mock offended gasp. “How dare you two gang up on me!”
“Is there anything else I can help you with? Do you have any questions?”
“I do,” Ashlyn said from one of the nearby cases.
“What’s that?”
She turned and smiled at Ali. “What’s a bitch gotta do to get one of these double chocolate brownies?”
Ali was embarrassed at how loud her laughter came out, quickly bringing a hand over her mouth. She stood up and walked behind the case, using a pair of metal tongs to pick one up and place it on a napkin. “All you have to do is ask.”
Ashlyn pulled out her wallet. “How much do I owe you?”
“Three dollars.”
“Three… do I not get a person of honor discount?!”
“I thought you said you weren’t?” Ali countered with a raised eyebrow.
“I said I wasn’t the maid of honor, I never said I wasn’t an honorable person. I think you’ll find I’m a straight up gent, a regular knight in shining armor,” she winked.
Ali chose to ignore the warmth spreading through her chest. “Well in that case… It’s on the house.”
Ashlyn grinned. “You’re an angel.” She took a bite and gave a comical groan. “Oh my… you really are an angel. This brownie is straight up descended from heaven.”
“I’m glad you like it.”
Megan snatched the brownie out of Ashlyn’s hand. “Alright, c’mon Harris, we have things to do today.”
“Hey, give that back!”
Megan danced towards the door with it, giving Ali a wave. “We’ll see you October 7th!”
“The 2nd!” Ali corrected.
“See you then!” She pushed open the door, still holding the brownie out of Ashlyn’s reach. The brunette turned back to Ali for a moment, grinning one last time and lifting her hand before following Megan out.
Ali stood for a moment behind the case, watching the two roughhouse through the front windows. It had been a long time since she had felt a rush of attraction for someone, especially someone she barely knew, but here it was, punching her square in the chest.
She gave her head a brisk shake. She didn’t know that woman, and even if she did, what’s to say she was attracted back? And anyways, she concluded, making her way back to the kitchen, she’d made her peace long ago with the fact that she was too busy for a relationship.
She turned the music up a few notches as she began to deep clean the machines. The day was far from over; she still had work to do.

Chapter Text

Ashlyn and Pinoe were several hours into playing FIFA 16 when Sue got home from work. “Hi baby.” She pressed a kiss to her fiancée’s cheek and made her way into the kitchen. “Who’s winning?”
“I am,” they both answered.
“How was work?” Pinoe asked as Sue came back with a bottle of water.
She shrugged. “It was alright. Nothing to complain about.” She took a sip of water. “Oh! How was the bakery?”
Pinoe let out a loud groan. “Oh my god, please don’t get her started, she hasn’t shut up all day.”
Ashlyn paused their game and turned around to face Sue. “Thank you for asking, Sue. It was great, because I met the woman of my dreams while I was there.”
She raised her eyebrows. “Well I’m happy for you, but you guys were actually supposed to be setting up wedding stuff.”
“What Ash means to say, is that she fell in love with a straight girl like a fucking moron.” She leaned over and pressed unpause on Ashlyn’s controller, immediately picking up her own and scoring on Ash.
“That was some bullshit, Pinoe!” Ashlyn turned back to Sue. “I’m being serious, the woman who’s baking your wedding cake is a fucking goddess. I want her to bear my children. She’s perfect.”
“Perfectly straight!”
“You don’t know that!”
“Okay, why do you say she’s straight?” Sue said, sitting in the armchair to the side of the couch.
“She just is,” Pinoe said as she rolled her eyes. “For one, she didn’t realize that I was gay. She asked for details about my groom.”
Sue laughed. “Okay, but to be fair, you didn’t know you were gay until you were in like college.”
“Yeah, but I also didn’t look like this. If I had come out of the womb with this haircut, maybe I would’ve realized sooner.”
“She’s so hot. And that brownie? Holy shit.” Ashlyn kissed her fingertips like a cartoon chef. “To die for.”
“It… was the best brownie I’ve probably ever eaten,” Pinoe admitted.
“Did you bring me anything?”
The blonde was suddenly sheepish. “My undying love and affection?”
Sue gave her another kiss. “You’re lucky you’re cute, Rapinoe.” She looked back at Ash. “So what makes you think Baker Girl is gay?”
“Her fingernails were cut very short-”
“She’s a BAKER,” Pinoe cut in.
“-and she was definitely flirting back.”
“Was she flirting?” Sue asked.
Pinoe opened her mouth to respond, then stopped. “She… she was a little flirty, I’ll give you that. But, I am almost 1000% sure she is straight. Maybe a little bicurious. But I don’t want you to go all puppy love on this girl and end up with your heart broken. I’m just trying to protect you, dude.” Her voice was uncharacteristically serious, and Ashlyn could tell she was trying to be gentle with her feelings.
“I just… felt something. As soon as she looked at me. Like I had found a puzzle piece I didn’t even know I was missing.”
“Oh hon… maybe you just need to get laid,” Sue said with a grin.
“That’s EXACTLY what I said!”
“I’m telling you Sue. Something was there. She told me to come back anytime.”
“Of course, she said that, she runs a bakery and you have the diet of a kindergartener. With you as a customer she’ll be able to buy a new car.”
“What is Baker Girl’s name anyway?”
“Ali,” they said in unison.
“Ali. Well, there’s only one way to get a for sure answer,” Sue reasoned.
“A magic 8 ball?”
“A Ouija board?”
“No, you have to go back in and talk to her.”
“I know. And I’m going to. I really am.” Ash brushed her hair back. “I’m going to go in and ask her on a date.”
The engaged couple shared a look then turned back to her. “Be sure to let us know how it goes,” Sue said with a smile.
“Oh don’t worry. You guys will definitely be invited to our wedding.”
X
“Stop squirming or this is gonna look like shit, dude.”
The man in the chair sighed. “How much longer is this going to take?”
Ashlyn chuckled as she wiped at his skin with a rag. “Trust me when I say that a tattoo is not something you want me to rush.” He grumbled something she couldn’t quite hear. “Do you need to take a break?”
“No, no, keep going. I’m fine, I just… I hate sitting still this long.”
She did her best to hide her smirk, dropping her head as she resumed work on his arm. Guys loved to come in and act like they were tough and invincible to pain, but time and again she found that they ended up complaining far more than any sorority girl getting ink on her ankle.
Twenty minutes later she sat up and turned off the gun. “There. Done.” She waited as he turned his arm over to inspect it. “What do you think?”
He grinned. “Looks sick, Harris.”
“Worth the pain?”
He shrugged. “Didn’t hurt that bad.”
She gave a barking laugh. “Sure it didn’t. Alright, let’s get you paid out.” He followed her to the front of the shop and handed over his credit card. She ran it then gave it back along with a packet of papers explaining proper after care for his new ink.
“I don’t need this, I remember from last time.”
“Humor me,” she replied. “It’s not gonna look good for either of us if it ends up infected.”
He gave a wave and exited the shop, leaving Ashlyn to head back to the employee break room. She found Kelley there, spinning around in a chair, looking bored out of her mind.
“Parker’s done?”
“Finally. No thanks to him fidgeting around like a little kid.”
“That was the last appointment for the day. Think we’ll have any walk ins?”
Ashlyn shrugged. “For your sake, and the sake of that chair, hopefully.” She stepped in front of the mirror to check her hair then stopped to carefully evaluate her outfit, fiddling with the rolled-up sleeves of her shirt. “How do I look?”
“Like shit.”
Ashlyn rolled her eyes. “I’m being serious, KO.”
“Well what do you mean?”
“Do you think I look cute?”
Kelley raised an eyebrow with a smirk. “You comin’ on to me, Harris? Because honestly I already see way to much of you. Not that I’m not flattered.”
Ashlyn lightly punched her in the shoulder. “No, I… I’m gonna go back to that bakery.”
Kelley raised a hand dramatically to her forehead. “Ooh! You’re finally gonna pull it together and go see Baker Girl?”
Ashlyn took a deep breath and nodded. “I mean, what’s the worst that could happen?”
“She could have a big, buff boyfriend who tries to beat the shit out of you for hitting on his girlfriend.”
She shrugs. “Wouldn’t be the first time. And thankfully, I got moves. ‘Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee’ and all that.” She brought up her hands and gave the air a couple playful jabs as she danced around, stopping once she ran into their coat rack and nearly knocked it over.
“Smooth moves, Rocky. Be sure to do that in front of Baker Girl.”
“I plan on it.”
“Seriously though, what’s your plan once you get there?”
Ashlyn shrugged. “I’m gonna go with the flow.”
“You don’t have a plan.”
Ashlyn shot her a grin. “Don’t need one. I just have to let true love work itself out.”
Kelley rolled her eyes and resumed spinning around in the chair again. “I see no way that this could work out poorly.”
X
Ashlyn checked her hair one last time before getting out of the Jeep and making her way across the parking lot. Patty Cakes was nestled into a little shopping center, nestled between an insurance agency and a dentist’s office. Ashlyn couldn’t help but smile at the painting on one of the windows of a woman with dark hair holding a cupcake.
A bell chimed as she walked in, the sweet aroma of baked goods hitting her full force. She couldn’t help but breathe it in deeply, closing her eyes.
“Hi, welcome to Patty Cakes!” She opened her eyes to see the same cashier from her previous visit behind the counter, a smile firmly in place.
“Hey, how are you?”
“Pretty good, you?”
“I’m good, good.” She shoved her hands in her pockets, letting her eyes play along the neat rows of pastries.
“Can I help you find something?”
She glanced back up and gave a nervous grin. “Actually, uh, yeah.” She swallowed hard, trying to mask how nervous she was suddenly feeling. “I was wondering if the owner was in?”
“The owner?”
“Yeah, um Ali?”
“Oh!” The girl gave her a smile. “You just missed her actually. She left…” she glanced at the clock on the wall, “thirty minutes ago?”
“Oh.” At no point had Ashlyn stopped to consider that Ali wouldn’t be here. “Right.”
“She comes in super early to man the kitchen, so she usually leaves on the early side,” the girl explained. “Did you… have an issue to discuss with her? Or did you need to ask her something?”
I just wanted to ask her out on a date. “It’s uh…nothing, really. It’s fine.” She quickly looked back down at the case in front of her. “I’ll just, I’ll take a dozen cookies.”
“What kind?”
“Which are the best?”
“Well… my favorite are the bacon peanut butter. But… The mint chocolate chip cookies are a new creation of Ali’s.”
She glanced up and noted a knowing smirk on the girl’s lips. “I don’t know that I’ve ever had a mint chocolate chip cookie.”
“They’re pretty delicious.”
“Well… a dozen of those, please.” The girl boxed up the cookies and Ashlyn pulled out her wallet to pay, ignoring the soft waves of disappointment making their way through her body. Pull it together, Harris.
“Thank you.”
“Sure thing. Do you want me to tell Ali you stopped by?”
She quickly laughed, rubbing at the back of her neck. “No, that’s totally fine. Don’t even worry about it.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah, it wasn’t important anyways.” Ashlyn took the cookies from the girl, Christen, her name tag read, and headed for the door.
“Y’know, if you wanted to come back, Ali’s here pretty much every single day. Come in between 9 and 2 and you’ll definitely catch her.”
“Oh! Uh, I’ll make sure to do that. Thanks.” She gave Christen one last smile and hurried back to her Jeep with her cookies, taking a deep breath once she was inside. She hadn’t thought she was that obvious, but from the look on Christen’s face, she had seen straight through her. Still, she reasoned as she turned the key in the ignition, now she knew the right time to catch Ali at the bakery.
And she even had cookies to bring back to the tattoo shop.

Chapter Text

“Alex, if you eat any more batter you’re gonna end up giving birth to a brownie instead of a baby.”
She rolled her eyes. “I haven’t even had that much.”
Ali gave her a smirk. “Your cheek says otherwise.” Alex ducked down to inspect her appearance in the reflection of the stainless-steel oven and Ali laughed. “Speaking of, when will you know what you’re having?”
“Serv doesn’t want to find out.”
She couldn’t help but pull a face as she refloured the counter and began to roll out her puff pastry. “What? But then how are you going to prepare? How will I know what to buy you?”
“Just buy it tiny soccer jerseys, that’s all it will end up wearing anyways.”
Alex lapsed into silence and Ali stole a glance at her. “Where is Serv playing next?”
“Portland.” Alex had met her husband when they were both playing collegiate soccer at UC Berkley, and from all accounts it had been love at first sight. By the time Ali had met her in culinary school, they were already engaged. Alex had sustained a pretty bad ACL injury at the end of her college career and didn’t spend much time talking about her old soccer days. Ali couldn’t help but wonder sometimes if she spent time dwelling on how things could have been, if she was the professional footballer instead of Serv.
“When will he get home?”
“Sunday.” Alex stretched her arms above her head with a low groan. “I just miss him, y’know?”
“Yeah.”
“Ali?” She turned to find Christen in the doorway. “There’s someone who needs to speak with you.”
She bit back a groan. “Is it Carlos again? I already gave him the quotes, if he doesn’t want to pay a fair price then he can make his own damn cakes.”
“No, it’s someone else.” Ali wiped her hands on a towel and followed Christen to the front.
She was shocked and- if she was being completely honest with herself- thrilled to see Ashlyn standing at one of the cases, her hands in her pockets. As much as she had resolved to put the other woman from her mind, there had been several nights when her thoughts had wondered to a certain head of short-cropped, dark hair, and arms covered with intricate tattoos.
“Ashlyn?”
She turned and gave Ali a grin, deepening her dimple. “Hey, you remember me.”
“I do.” She brushed her hands along the front of her apron. “How are you?”
“I’m good! Good… was just in the neighborhood. Thought I would swing by.”
“Nice. Did you manage to wrangle that brownie back from Megan?”
She grinned, placing a hand over her stomach. “Scrumptious. Ten out of ten. Five stars.”
Ali giggled. “Well, I’m glad to hear that.”
“Pinoe and I were actually in a bit of hot water later that day. We wouldn’t stop talking about… well, how superior your baking skills are, and Sue was a little peeved that we didn’t bring her anything.”
Ali steadfastly ignored the blush rising in her cheeks. “We’ll have to do something about that then.” She turned and also let her eyes flit over the cases. “Megan said she likes smores, right?”
“Good memory.”
Ali stepped around and plucked a pastry from the display, sliding it into a small paper bag. “A smores cheesecake bar. Not quite fancy enough for the bridal shower, but it’ll let her know that I mean business.”
Ashlyn took it from her. “You’re a lifesaver.”
“Well, a happy bride means a happy life.”
They stood for a moment, grinning at each other with uncertainty.
“What did you think about those mint chocolate chip cookies?” They both turned to face Christen, having forgotten she was behind the register.
“They… oh my gosh! So good. My coworkers and I were singing your praises.”
“Oh did you come back by?”
“Yeah,” Ashlyn rubbed the back of her neck, “I swung by a few days ago. It was a slow afternoon at work and I was in the mood for something sweet.”
“Were you looking for me?” The moment it came out of Ali’s mouth it felt too forward and flirty, and part of her tried to combust on the spot.
For her part, Ashlyn just stared at her for a moment before chuckling. “Something like that.”
“So you liked them?”
“I really did.”
“Mint chocolate chip is Ali’s favorite flavor combination. She loves it.” Ali turned and raised her eyebrows at her employee with a smile.
“Hey Chris, maybe you could step into the back and see if Alex has managed to get any of the brownie batter in the oven? I’ll keep an eye on the shop.”
The younger woman simply smirked and did as she was told. Ali turned back to Ashlyn. “Sorry. She’s a great employee, good at her job, but also a harbinger of chaos.”
“I can see that.” Ali watched as her eyes played over the front windows, her own eyes drinking in the delicious angle of her cheekbones. “So… childhood obsession?”
Ali’s mind was suddenly consumed with memories of being in elementary school, having a best friend who she loved more than anything in the world, who she would have followed to the ends of the earth. Her mind whirled past that to when they were a little bit older and that same friend suggested they practice kissing on each other, something Ali couldn’t possibly say no to, and the way she was always eager to agree to more practice sessions, to how sweet her friend smelled, so much better than the sweaty teenage boys they would eventually move on to-
“I’m sorry?”
Ashlyn smiled. “Patty Cakes.”
“Oh!” Ali gave her head a quick shake. “I took over the bakery from my Meemaw, Miss Patty. I didn’t have any say in the naming.”
“I like it, it’s cute.”
Ali swallowed, still trying to move her mind past the memories of kissing a girl for the first time. “So… did you have a reason for stopping by? Other than saving yourself from your friend’s wrath, anyway?”
“Uh yeah. I was wondering… well you seem really cool and smart. And I was wondering if you would maybe want to get together sometime. Maybe this weekend? Your cashier mentioned that you work early mornings, so I completely understand if you would be too tired, but I was thinking if you maybe wanted to grab dinner on Saturday night, there’s a place in Old Town, it’s called Magnolia’s? You may have already been there. Which, if you have, then you know it’s amazing. It also has options, I don’t know if you’re a vegetarian or a vegan-”
“Do I look like a vegan?”
Ashlyn paused in her rambling. “Not really,” she admitted with a chuckle.
“If I was, I don’t think I could run a bakery,” Ali teased.
“Probably not, no.”
“This weekend?”
“Yeah. If you want to. If you’re not busy.”
“Let me take a look.” Ali crossed to the register and pulled out the event binder.
“You have a binder just to keep your social life running smoothly?”
She laughed, hoping she didn’t look as frazzled as she was feeling. “I just need to check and make sure we don’t have any huge deliveries or events.” She scanned the page. “Would Friday work?”
“I’ll be at the shop Friday night. Saturday?” Was Ali imagining the notes of hopefulness in Ashlyn’s voice.
“Yeah. Yeah, Saturday works. What time?”
“Say 6:00?”
“That’s perfect.”
“Awesome. Here, I’ll give you my number.” Ashlyn grabbed a flyer from the top of the counter and flipped it over, jotting down her phone number with a pen she pulled from her pocket. She gave Ali another grin as she passed it over.
She tucked the paper into her apron. “Perfect. 6:00 on Saturday. Magnolia’s.”
“It’s a date.” And without another word, Ashlyn gave a half wave and left the bakery.
Ali stood for a moment, frozen. Had that really just happened?
X
“Oh hello, sister of mine!”
“I need help.”
Kyle sighed dramatically into the phone. “Did you know that you can call me for things other than minor disasters?”
“Kyle, please.”
“I’m just saying. Every time your name pops up on my phone, it’s because Meemaw is throwing a fit over you modifying a recipe, or Mom and Dad are having another dumb argument about something-”
“I think I have a date this weekend.”
He paused for a second. “Alexandra Blaire! Do my ears deceive me? You, the ice princess, the great heartless one, is going on a date? Debasing herself among the mere mortals?”
“Knock it off or I’m hanging up.” She had been prepared for her brother’s copious teasing, but he was the only person she felt like she could talk to about this.
“Okay, okay. So tell me about him. Is he tall, dark, and handsome? Short, blond, and interesting? Paint me a picture.”
“It’s, um…”
“Ali?”
“It’s a woman.”
Silence rang in her ears for a moment before Kyle exploded. “Yas! Lesbian Ali is coming out to play! I love it! I’ve been eagerly awaiting her return!”
“Will you… I’m not a lesbian,” she grumbled.
“I think that softball player you banged at Penn State would beg to differ.”
“Just because I sleep with women doesn’t mean I’m not attracted to men. Just like when I sleep with men, it doesn’t mean I’m not attracted to women! It’s a thing, there’s a word for it. In fact, there are multiple words for it!”
Kyle let her take a breath. “Yeah babe, there are words for it. Words that, unless I’m misremembering, you’ve never felt comfortable using.”
She ignored him. “But back to why I’m calling, I don’t even know if it is a date.”
“Well, did she say it was?”
Ali sighed as she continued pacing around her apartment. “Yes.”
“Then… where is this confusion coming from?”
“Well we made the plan and then she gave me her number so that we could… I don’t know, communicate, and then she said, ‘It’s a date.’ But people say that all the time. I mean, that’s what you say to your trainer when you schedule your next session. I say it to people all the time when I’m booking them in for a consultation.”
“Is she gay?”
Ali scoffed. “Oh definitely.”
“You sound pretty sure of that.”
“Picture Ruby Rose, but an even better jawline.”
“What?? Girl, do not even tease me like this.”
Ali took a detour into the kitchen to top off her wine glass. “I’m being 100% serious. Stunning. She even has the tattoos.”
“Well if she looks like that and she said that it’s a date… it’s probably a date.”
“I mean, you would think so, right?”
He sighed into the phone. “I can only imagine that you’re overthinking this.”
“Probably. It’s what I do best.”
“What are you going to wear?”
She let out a deep breath. “No idea. I feel like I own nothing but bakery appropriate clothing.”
“As someone who has seen your closet, I know that’s not true.”
“Do I dress up? Do I dress casual? We’re meeting for dinner.”
“Wear something that makes you look like dessert.”
“I’m hanging up.”
“Wait, wait, I’m sorry. Just… Don’t stress yourself out too much about this. You’re beautiful, smart, confident, and talented. And she obviously has already seen some of that in you, so just be yourself. The rest will figure itself out.”
“Okay. You’re right.”
“As usual.”
She smiled, finally settling onto the couch. “How is everything? How’s LA?”
“Beautiful. Hot. The AC at the salon is on the fritz, and if it dies before the guy is able to come and take a look at it, I’m going to throw myself into the ocean.”
“Well, that would probably cool you off.”
“My thoughts exactly.”
She pulled one of the throw pillows into her lap. “I’m sorry I don’t call you more. You’re right, I shouldn’t wait until something goes wrong to reach out.”
“I was just teasing you, Alex. Although, I’m always happy to hear your voice. I miss you.”
“I miss you, too. When will you come back to the East Coast?”
“Never. It’s too cold.”
She laughed. “Weren’t you just complaining about how hot California is?!”
“I didn’t mean it. She’s my one true love. Well, that and dick.”
She rolled her eyes and groaned. “Oh my god. I have to go.”
“You love me.”
She grinned. “I really do. Thank you for talking me down from the ledge.”
“Any time, and I mean that.”

Chapter Text

“Blue or black?”
“Those are both black.”
Ashlyn groaned. “Pinoe, one is clearly a dark navy blue.”
“Just pick one! Jesus, I’ve never seen you this out of sorts before a date.”
Ashlyn busied herself with fussing with the shirts laid out on the bed. “Just wanna make sure I look good.”
“And you will, dude. But not if you second guess everything you’re wearing, from the shirt down to your watch.”
She furrowed her eyebrows, glaring down at the piece of jewelry on her wrist. “Do you think I should wear a different one?”
Pinoe rolled her eyes and laid down on Ashlyn’s bed. “You’re crazy. Baker girl isn’t going to run away based on your taste in watches.”
“I don’t wanna fuck this up.”
“And I’m telling you, you won’t!” She turned and studied Ashlyn for a second. “How long has it been, anyway?”
“Been since what?”
“You went on a date.”
She let out a slow breath, thinking back. “Three months? Four months?”
“Aw, Sue and I were right, you do need to get laid.” She laughed and caught the shoe Ashlyn threw at her.
“You said since I’ve been on a date, not had sex. There was the girl from DC, remember?”
Pinoe’s eyes lit up. “Oh yeah, the FBI agent, right?”
Ashlyn smirked. “She was never able to confirm or deny as much.”
“She was hot, dude.”
“Ali’s hotter.”
“Okay, I can’t take this anymore.” Pinoe pushed herself up from the bed and came to stand beside Ashlyn. “This shirt, these jeans, and the Dr Martens.”
“You sure?”
“Yes. Go change.”
Ashlyn started towards the bathroom before turning back. “But here’s the thing, are you sure I shouldn’t wear a button down-”
“Change! Now!”
She rolled her eyes and did as she was told. She tried to talk some sense into herself as she pulled on the outfit Pinoe had picked out. It was just a date, a first date, it shouldn’t feel like such a big deal. It’s not like she was proposing or anything. It was just dinner.
Yeah, dinner with the first girl you’ve been truly attracted to in a long time. She tried to quiet the voice whispering in the back of her mind, instead coming out of the bathroom and modeling the look for Pinoe, complete with a spin and a Michael Jackson pelvic thrust.
“Look at you, hot stuff! Did I tell you, or what?”
Ashlyn turned to check herself out in the full-length mirror and had to admit that PInoe had been right. The navy tee looked good against the distressed black jeans, and the brown boots made her look put together, but still on the casual side. She passed a hand over her hair, making sure the swoop was still gelled in place.
“You were right. I look hot as hell.”
“There’s my girl.”
Ashlyn checked her messages for the 18th time. She and Ali had texted back and forth a few times, not much, but enough for Ashlyn to fixate on every single word. “Did I tell you I found her Instagram?”
“No?”
Ashlyn nodded sheepishly. “I… googled Patty Cakes and found an article that the Alexandria Times did when she took over the bakery. From there I found her last name, and then went to the business Instagram and stalked my way to her personal page.”
“Creepy, but okay. Find anything interesting?”
“Some pictures with her brother, of her hanging out with friends. Lots of puppy pics. Oh, she lived in Germany for a while.”
“Really? That’s super cool, actually. When?”
Ash shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant and failing. “Probably like… five years ago?”
Pinoe raised her eyebrows. “Oh, you stalk stalked her.”
“Shut up,” Ashlyn grumbled, her face flushing.
“Any pictures of old girlfriends?”
“Not that I saw.”
“Boyfriends?” Ashlyn shrugged. “Well that doesn’t prove anything either way.”
“Maybe she doesn’t post much about relationships. Or maybe she’s the type to go back and delete posts in the aftermath of a breakup.”
“Or maybe she’s a beautiful, evil witch who’s actually hundreds of years old and retains her eternal youth by seducing young lesbians and bathing in their blood.”
“Don’t you have something else you can be doing?”
She stood up from the bed with a shit eating grin. “You’re the one who invited me over, remember? If I’m that much of a pain, maybe I’ll go.”
“No!” Ash took a deep breath. “You’re annoying but you’re keeping me distracted.”
“Maybe too distracted. What time are you meeting her?”
“6:00.”
She glanced down at her watch then back up at Ash. “It’s five till.”
Her eyes bugged out and she threw herself into motion, grabbing her phone, keys, and wallet as she hurried to leave. “Fuck, I’m going to be late!”
“I’ll just let myself out!” She heard Pinoe call as the front door swung shut behind her.
X
She was sweaty and out of breath as she jogged to the door of Magnolia’s. She pushed it open and approached the hostess, running a hand over her hair as she did.
“Hi, I’m so sorry, I had a reservation for 2 at 6:00 under the name Ashlyn Harris. I’m actually meeting someone, I don’t know if she’s here, or if maybe she came and left-”
“Ashlyn?”
She turned to find Ali behind her. Relief flooded through her body that Ali hadn’t left, but it was quickly replaced by awe.
Because Ali looked damn good.
She was wearing a high necked white top tucked into a black skirt that hugged her curves then stopped a few inches above her knees. Her dark hair was down and wavy, longer than Ashlyn would have expected if she hadn’t spent some serious time combing through her social media. Her makeup was finished off with a dark red lipstick that made Ashlyn want to immediately kiss it off. She swallowed, her mouth dry. “Ali! You look… amazing.”
She flushed, a small smile gracing her lips. “So do you.”
Ashlyn’s brain finally remembered how to string coherent words together. “I’m so sorry I’m late. I’m usually on time, I just, Pinoe was over and was being a pain, and then I got caught in traffic-”
“You’re okay,” Ali assured her. “Although, I was a little worried you had changed your mind.”
It was Ashlyn’s turn to smile. “Change my mind about you? Not a chance.”
“So… Harris, table for two?” The hostess awkwardly cut in. Both women turned to face her, flustered at how this evening had begun.
“Yes. That’s us.”
She led them through the restaurant before seating them at a table next to a window. A waiter was instantly there, filling their water glasses and asking for drink orders.
“I’ll take a glass of Malbec, please.”
“And I will take a Maker’s Mark, on the rocks. Thanks.”
They settled back to look at each other as he stepped away. “This place is really beautiful,” Ali said softly, breaking their eye contact to glance around.
“I didn’t oversell it?”
She laughed. “So far, it’s as described. So do you have any recommendations, since you’ve eaten here before?”
Ashlyn hummed as she looked over the menu. “When I came with my brother, I had the country fried chicken, and it was delicious. He had the zucchini noodles and had great things to say about them but I just…” she wrinkled her nose and gave her head a little shake. “The texture. I couldn’t even try them.”
“Fair enough.”
“Oh, and the mac and cheese! It’s delish. Nothing on the homemade stuff, but still good.”
The waiter reappeared and placed their drinks in front of them. “Are you ready to order?” Ashlyn gestured for Ali to go first.
“I will take… the Strawberry Fields salad with chicken. And perhaps a side of your macaroni and cheese, since I hear it’s pretty tasty.” She smiled at Ashlyn as she handed back her menu.
“Make that two mac and cheeses and I will have the pork chop.” He nodded and hurried away. Ashlyn picked up her whiskey. “Cheers.”
Ali did the same, tapping her wine glass against Ashlyn’s. “To a great night.” They both took a sip. “So… you have me at a bit of a disadvantage.”
“Why’s that?”
“You know way more about me than I know about you.” Ashlyn froze for a moment, wondering how Ali could possible know about her deep Instagram dive. “I mean, you know what I do for a living, you know that I’m good at my job…”
Ashlyn laughed, relaxing slightly. “I know that you’re incredibly humble,” she continued for her.
“Obviously,” Ali grinned.
“I’m a tattoo artist, I work at a shop in Del Ray.”
“Oh, that’s so awesome! What is it called?”
“The Gentleman’s Driving Club.”
“That… sounds like a strip club.”
Ashlyn chuckled. “It’s named after an old horse racing establishment. But I think we get at least one or two confused dudes a month who have the same idea.”
“How long have you been a tattoo artist?”
“I did an apprenticeship in Brooklyn when I was 20, and I’ve been working ever since I completed the program a year and a half later.”
“And that was… how long ago?” Ali laughed to herself. “I realized this morning that I have no clue how old you are.”
“I’m 28.”
“Oh good. I’m 29.”
“Do you have any tattoos?”
Ali smirked. “Yeah, I have one.”
Ashlyn stared at her expectantly for a moment than laughed. “Is that all I’m gonna get?”
“I have a quote from the German translation of The Little Prince, but it’s not in a place that’s visible. Well, not on a first date anyway.”
Ashlyn fought the urge to clear her throat as her mind ran away imagining where it could possibly be and how many dates it would take before she saw it. “That’s awesome. Is that your favorite book?”
“It is.”
“And you… know German, I’m guessing?”
“Yeah. I did an apprenticeship with a baker in Frankfurt after I graduated from pastry school.”
“That must have been incredible.”
“Oh it was. I was at the top of my class in San Fran, but I quickly realized I had so much to learn…” As Ali began to passionately delve into the differences between culinary school and actually being in a bakery, her eyes lit up and she began to use her hand animatedly. Ashlyn watched her as if in a trance, drinking in everything she could about her.
“Sorry,” Ali suddenly said in a softer voice. “All of this must be… incredibly boring,” she laughed.
“No, no,” Ashlyn grabbed her hand, “it’s obviously something that makes you happy.”
Ali ducked her head shyly, not pulling away as Ashlyn entangled their fingers. “It is. It was always kind of expected that I would take over the bakery from my Meemaw but I’m lucky that it’s something I really love. It’s a family business but it’s also my passion.”
“I love that.” Ashlyn stroked her thumb along Ali’s. “You said you have a brother, right? Older, younger?”
“Older by a year.”
“Why wasn’t he first in line to take over the baking dynasty?” Ashlyn teased.
A flurry of emotion crossed Ali’s face, and she finally gave a chuckle that seemed a bit forced. “Kyle is beyond useless in a kitchen. It’s best for everyone that he didn’t take over.”
“You mentioned the first day we met that he’s gay,” Ashlyn couldn’t help but tease.
Ali groaned and brought her free hand to her forehead. “That was… so cringey. Leave it to me to look at your friend Megan and then ask about her groom. And then, when I brought up Kyle, I was literally so embarrassed.”
Ashlyn laughed. “We did laugh about it on the way home, but mostly just at the thought of Pinoe being anything other than super gay.”
“I know, I don’t… ugh. Anyways, yeah Kyle is gay.”
“Two gay kids in one family… That seems pretty rare. How did your parents react?” Ali stared at her for a moment, but then they were interrupted by the waiter bringing their food.
“Oh this looks amazing,” Ashlyn moaned, taking in the spread between them.
“I’m anxious to try this macaroni.”
“As you should be.” She settled her napkin in her lip, watching as Ali brought a forkful to her lips. Her eyes fluttered closed for a moment, then she shot Ashlyn a glance.
“You weren’t kidding around.”
Ashlyn grinned. “I never kid about mac n cheese.”
Dinner passed easily, both of talking and laughing, slowly getting to know each other better. When the waiter dropped the check, they both reached for it but Ashlyn got there first.
“Do you want to split it?” Ali asked.
“Nah, I’ve got it. I’m still proving that I’m a person of honor, after all,” she replied with a wink.
Once outside the restaurant, Ashlyn took Ali’s hand. “Which way is your car? I’ll walk you to it.”
“Over here.” They lapsed into a comfortable silence as they walked to where Ali’s car was parked.
“Thank you for tonight. I had a really good time.”
“I did too,” Ashlyn assured her. She stared at her for a moment. “Can I… would it be okay if I-”
Ali cut her off by leaning forward and pressing her lips to hers. Ashlyn remained frozen for a moment, her arms hanging uselessly at her sides, then her brain kicked her body back into motion. One hand came up to cup Ali’s cheek, the other finding it’s way to her bicep, not failing to notice the firm muscle there. It was a sweet kiss, nothing hard or searching, and when Ali pulled back, Ashlyn couldn’t help the soft, silly smile that graced her lips.
“Was that a yes?”
Ali laughed and swatted her gently on the shoulder. “You could call it that.” She pulled her hands through her hair, shaking it away from her face. “I’d really like to go out with you again.”
“I’d like that, too.”
“Good.”
“Great.”
“Perfect.” They smiled at each other for a second, then started laughing again. “I should go.”
This time Ashlyn was the one who leaned in, pressing a kiss to Ali’s cheek before pulling back. “Text me when you get home, okay?”
“Will do.” Ali pulled her keys from her purse and unlocked her car, giving Ashlyn a little wave before getting in.
Ash began the walk back to her own car, aware of the cheesy grin on her lips but powerless to do anything about it. Her entire body was tingling and drunk, not from the whiskey she’d had in the restaurant, but from that kiss.
If this was date one, she couldn’t imagine how much better it would get from here.

Chapter Text

“Alex! You made it!” Ali’s mom kissed her cheek as she wrapped her up in a hug.
“Am I late?” She asked, pulling back to glance at her watch.
“No sweetie, we just... You’re so busy all the time. We thought you might change your mind about dinner.” Her dad pressed a kiss to her temple as he gave her a hug.
“Work has been pretty busy,” she admitted. “I have a few weddings coming up, and a 50th wedding anniversary.”
“Ooh, anyone we know?”
Ali shook her head as her phone vibrated in her back pocket. “I don’t think so.” She gestured towards the door to the restaurant. “Do we want to head in?”
“I don’t know if everyone is here yet.”
“Everyone? I thought it was just the three of us.”
Her mom waved a hand nonchalantly. “Well that was the plan originally, but then we were talking with Tom and Jan McAllister at church and they were asking about you, so I decided to invite them along so they could ask you themselves! And then Pat and Eileen are in town visiting his sister, it just seemed right for them to come.”
Ali silenced an exhausted sigh. She really hadn’t even wanted to come out tonight, but she had promised her parents she would meet them. The last thing she wanted to do was sit around and listen to them and their friends talk about the mundane goings on of middle aged life. “Sounds like a plan,” she replied instead.
“Oh there’s Eileen and Pat!” Her mother waved at them, and the other couple walked over.
“Little Ali Krieger! Look at you, all grown up.”
She blushed as Eileen pulled her into a tight embrace. “Hi, how are you?”
“Oh, you know us, just chugging along. Pat, look at how beautiful she is.”
“Quite a looker, just like your mother,” he winked, earning a swat from his wife.
“Where’s the other three?”
“Three?” Ali questioned.
“Tom, Jan, and their son Tyler,” Eileen said casually, and it took everything Ali had not to roll her eyes and groan. Of course, that’s what this was. She was a fool to think it was ever anything else.
Her family would never admit it out loud, but they were counting down the days until she found a man to settle down with and get married. It’s not that they thought less of her because she wasn’t... it was just what was expected. And with Kyle having come out over ten years earlier, the pressure was laser focused on her.
Her mom raised her eyebrows with a knowing smile, and Ali pulled her phone out of her back pocket, trying to push away the grumpiness spreading through her chest. She opened a message from Ash, smiling as she was greeted by a picture of a dog, his tongue out to the side as he seemed to smile at the camera.
‘Spotted this little guy on the way to the store. Love at first sight!’ She grinned as another picture came in, this one of the dog licking Ashlyn’s cheek as she cheesed hard at the camera.
She quickly typed a reply.
‘Aw does this mean you’re ditching on our date next week?’
She only had to wait a few seconds for a message back.
‘NEVER’
‘But maybe this good boy can tag along’
“There they are! Jan!” Ali put her phone away in the name of being polite.
Tyler McAllister wasn’t unattractive. He was tall with brown hair and a scruffy beard. He shook hands dutifully with everyone, giving Ali an easy smile when he got to her last.
“Hey there. You must be Ali.”
“That’s me.”
“I’ve heard so much about you.”
She couldn’t help but shoot her mom a tight-lipped smile. “I can only imagine.”
“Well, should we head inside?” Ken held the door and everyone began to file past. Ali was last and he caught her elbow. “Be nice, it’s just dinner.”
She took a calming breath even as she rolled her eyes. “I was kind of looking forward to catching up with just the two of you, y’know.”
He just smiled and clapped a hand on her shoulder. “She means well.”
“I know.”
They rejoined the group and were led to a table. Somehow Ali just happened to end up beside Tyler, her mom on her other side. She couldn’t help but feel pinned in. When the waiter came around for drink orders she asked for a glass of cabernet. She hadn’t planned on drinking, but now wine seemed like a wonderful idea.
“So Tyler,” Deb began after everyone had gotten settled in, “your mom tells me that you were just promoted within your firm?”
He nodded, placing his water glass back down. “A few months back, yes.” He looked at Ali. “I work at a hedge fund in DC.”
“What do you do there?” He began explaining the basics of high risk investing and it took everything she had not to let her eyes glaze over. She could understand how to some people that might be interesting, but she couldn’t think of anything she would want to do less.
Except for maybe listen to someone talk about it.
Eileen smiled at her from across the table. “How’s the bakery? Your mom brought in some of your cookies to the Ladies’ Luncheon a few weeks ago and they were like little tastes of heaven.”
Jan nodded in fervid agreement. “I must have had half a dozen! I couldn’t stop myself!”
“I’m glad you enjoyed them, especially since someone forgot to put in an order for the Ladies’ Luncheon until the night before,” she laughed with a pointed look at her mother.
Deb grinned guiltily. “Oh you whipped them up in no time flat.”
“You were lucky we didn’t have any other big orders in.”
“How long have you been a baker?”
She turned back to Tyler. “I went to culinary school after I graduated from Penn State, and I’ve been working in kitchens about six years.”
“But my mother turned over the family bakery to Ali just two years ago,” Deb added.
“I remember that wedding cake you did for Pamela Lloyd’s daughter, Carli! It looked like a downright piece of art.”
“And more importantly, it tasted like one,” Eileen chuckled.
“Wedding cakes are probably one of my favorite things to make,” Ali admitted. “I mean, you pour so many hours into it, between the tastings and designing it, then baking and assembly. But at the end you’ve created something that people recognize as a symbol of love.”
Eileen gave her a smile as she took a sip of her water. “And what about you? Any wedding cakes in your future, missy?”
She chuckled nervously. “No, not for me yet… I don’t have much time to date. I spend most of my time at the bakery, it doesn’t leave a lot of time for meeting people.”
“Tyler was just saying the same thing! He said that unless a cute girl wandered into his office, he wouldn’t know how to go about finding one!” Jan exclaimed.
“Well, I don’t think I said it quite like that.” Tyler cut in.
“Salmon with coconut ginger rice?” Ali breathed a silent sigh of relief as the waiter began to pass out everyone’s food. After her own Thai island shrimp was placed in front of her, she stood up.
“I’m just going to step into the ladies’ room.”
As soon as she was safely hidden inside the women’s bathroom, she pulled her phone out of her pocket. Her first order of business was to text Ashlyn back.
‘He can definitely come along! But I’m only paying for you ;)’
Next she opened up a message to her brother.
‘Mom and Dad have been bugging me to meet them for dinner lately. Finally make it and what happens? She invites along two other couples and one of their sons! It’ll be a miracle if we get to dessert before she has Dad negotiating my dowry!’
Finally she texted Alex.
‘Ugh 911 at dinner with my parents. Can you call with a fake emergency in five minutes?’
She put her phone back in her pocket and stared at herself in the mirror for a second. She knew that her mom was only trying to help, that she was worried that Ali was lonely and would miss out on life while she was working herself to the bone. But she didn’t know Tyler McAllister, and everything about this evening felt awkward and forced.
Maybe she wouldn’t try to set you up on dates if she knew that you had gone on one recently. She snorted at the idea.
Kyle had come out to everyone when he was in high school. A lot of kids tend to wait until college before officially switching teams, but Kyle had always been one who needed to stay true to the beat of his drum. To say that it hadn’t gone well was an understatement. Their mom had cried for days. Their dad had been weirdly silent, not really talking to anyone. They had both refused to speak any further about it and banned Kyle from telling any of their extended family. They treated it like a dirty secret that would mess up their perfectly crafted, Pottery Barn life. For her part, Ali had tried to convince him that maybe he was wrong.
She leaned against the window, watching as Kyle slumped in his desk chair, head in his hands. “Well what did you expect to happen?”
“I don’t know?! Maybe for them to say that they love me? That they always will, no matter what?”
“They do love you, Kyle.”
“Then why aren’t they acting like it?” He raised his head and her heart ached at the tear marks on his cheeks. “Don’t they realize that I didn’t choose to be like this? It would be so much easier if I was straight, but I’m just not. I like men, and I’m tired of pretending otherwise.”
She began to pick at her thumbnail. “I mean, just because you like guys doesn’t mean you’re automatically gay.”
He rolled his eyes. “That’s exactly what it means, Alex.”
“I’m serious. I mean, I think about kissing girls sometimes. It doesn’t mean anything.”
He studied his fifteen-year-old sister’s face. “You do?”
She shrugged. “Yeah, I mean, girls are softer than boys, and they usually smell better. Who wouldn’t want to kiss them?”
He stared at her for a moment before smiling slightly. “Me. I can see what you’re saying, I can appreciate when a woman is beautiful. But I don’t want to kiss one.”
“At all?” He shook his head. “Oh.”
He fully turned to face her. “Is there… anything you need to talk about?”
Kyle was her best friend, the one person in the world she knew she could tell anything without him judging her, but she felt a flash of fear and panic flood her body at the thought that maybe, just maybe, she was also gay.
She shook her head. “No.” She wasn’t gay. She liked men. But that didn’t mean she wouldn’t do whatever was necessary to support her brother and love him even harder while their parents processed this.
She walked back to the table and settled into her chair.
“We were just talking about how y’all’s generation waits so long to do things now. I mean, by the time I was your age Ali, I’d already had all three of my boys!” Eileen said.
“It’s just… harder, I guess. Like I was saying earlier, I spend so much time working.”
“It’s a general shift in priorities, as well,” Tyler added. “I knew I didn’t want to get married while I was in college or law school, because I didn’t have the energy to really be with someone. I was pretty much married to the librarian,” he grinned with a roll of his eyes.
“Yeah, and how’d that go for you?” Ken asked.
“Gertie was great, but Bob, her husband of forty years, was less than impressed with our courtship.” Ali’s phone began to ring as everyone laughed. She pulled it out and made an apologetic gesture to the table.
“So sorry, it’s work.” She pressed accept and brought the phone to her ear. “Hello?”
“Ali! Um… we have a last-minute order for tomorrow morning. They need… Bundt cakes and a fruitcake and… baklava.”
Ali barely managed to avoid rolling her eyes. Fake emergencies were definitely not Alex’s strong suit. “Can you handle it? I’m in the middle of dinner.”
“No way, I’m in the middle of rewatching America’s Next Top Model.”
Ali suppressed a smile. “Okay. Okay, um… I’m on my way. Give me twenty and I’ll meet you at the bakery.”
“Sweet!”
“Thanks Alex.” She hung up and returned her attention to the table. “I’m so sorry, we had a last-minute rush order and I’m needed back at the shop.”
“But you didn’t even get to eat anything,” her mom cut in.
She shrugged helplessly as she stood up. “Duty calls.” She looked between the two older couples. “It was so nice to see you again.” She gathered up her purse and phone. “And it was nice to meet you, Tyler.” She leaned down and pressed a kiss to her mom’s cheek. “Have a good night!” She hurried away from the table before anyone could respond.
Once in her car, she called Alex back.
“Hello?”
“You’re an absolute lifesaver.”
“What happened at dinner? Were your parents sacrificing live animals or something?”
“Worse, they were trying to force a meet cute with a boy whose parents go to church with them.”
“Aw well that doesn’t sound too bad.”
Ali rolled her eyes. “Have you had dinner yet?”
“Yes, but I’m always up to eat again.”
“I’ll be over in ten with chicken nuggets.”
“The models and I will be waiting.”

Chapter Text

"How many peanut M&M's do you think I could fit in my mouth?"
Ashlyn looked up from where she was sanitizing her equipment. "Are you serious right now?"
Kelley shrugged, grinning as she leaned against the counter. "I'm a woman of science, Ash. Once a question comes to me, I need to know the answer."
"You just want an excuse to eat twenty peanut M&M's."
Kelley scoffed. "Are you kidding? More like an excuse to eat forty five."
"There's no way."
"I have a deceptively large mouth, look." She shoved her face into Ashlyn's, mouth wide open, and Ash tried to wrestle away from her with a laugh. "Look!"
The door to the shop opened and Kelley glanced over, quickly disentangling herself from Ashlyn. "Hey, uh... welcome to the Gentlemen's Driving Club."
Ashlyn stared at her in amusement, she rarely saw Kelley get embarassed, even when she was caught doing something dumb. She looked behind her and quickly realized why.
An exceedingly hot woman had just walked in. She had long black hair that was tossed over one shoulder, and was watching the two with a smirk.
"Hey there," Ash echoed awkwardly.
"I hear this is one of the best tattoo shops in the city."
They both nodded dumbly for a moment before Ashlyn broke the silence. "That's what our customers say. I'm Ashlyn, by the way."
"Kelley."
"I'm Grace."
"What brings you in?"
"Well I was wanting to talk to someone about adding to a piece I already have."
"We can do that for you. What's the existing piece?"
The woman strutted towards them, reaching past Ash to place her small purse on the chair. Then, without a word of warning, she grabbed the hem of her crop top and pulled it over her head, leaving herself in nothing more than baggy jeans and a lace bralette that did nothing to hide the glitter of the silver piercing adorning one nipple. She took a hair tie from her wrist and pulled her hair up into a messy bun before turning to show them her back. A massive pair of angel wings spanned her shoulder blades, intricately detailed, seeming almost too life like in how they dripped down her back before disappearing just beneath the waistband of her jeans.
"Wow. This is... really well done. How long did you have to sit for it?"
Grace turned back to face them. "Three different sessions."
Kelley gave a low whistle and Ashlyn couldn't help but nod in agreement. "And you're looking to add to it?"
"I think so. I have a few ideas, but I wanted to see what you thought first."
"We can definitely get some sketches going. I think we can set you up with something you love. You're in good hands with us."
Grace reached out and grabbed her hand, pulling it closer and giving it a critical assessment. "I'd say you have something closer to great hands," she concluded with a flirty smile. She leaned in slightly closer. "I bet you work magic with them."
It seemed to Ashlyn that the temperature in the tattoo parlor had suddenly risen twenty degrees. She gave a slightly stuttering laugh. "They're not bad."
Her phone began to vibrate in her back pocket, making her pull away. She pulled it out to see Ali's name. "One second." She stepped away. "Hey."
"Hey..."
"Is everything okay?"
"I'm an idiot."
Ashlyn couldn't stop the smile from pulling at her lips. "I'm sure that's not true. What's up?"
"So in my haste to get out of the bakery with enough time to go home and shower and get ready, I managed to lock my purse in my car. Which wouldn't be that big of a deal, but it contains the keys to both my car and my apartment."
"Oh no!"
"Oh yes," she chuckled. "And my parents, who have a key for exactly this sort of situation, are out of town visiting family and won't be back until tomorrow morning. And Alex has very kindly agreed to put me up for the night, but unfortunately I have to cancel on our date because I have no car, no money, and no where to get ready."
"Then don't." Ali laughed but Ashlyn pressed on. "Just wear whatever you already have one."
"That's sweet, but I don't look cute. I'm in leggings and a tee shirt, and I'm pretty sure I have cake batter in my hair."
"Hey, I have nothing against cake batter!" Ali giggled into the phone and it made Ashlyn's chest warm. "I'm being serious. We can kick it somewhere low key, and I can spot you money. And then tonight I can drop you off at Alex's when we're done."
"No, I don't want to put you out."
"You wouldn't be. I promise."
Ali paused on the other end. "Are you sure?"
"I'm positive."
"Okay." Ash grinned. "So I'll come pick you up at the bakery?"
"Yeah, but take your time. We weren't supposed to meet up for another few hours, I'll just hang out here and let Alex know what's happening."
"Don't be silly. You've worked a full day, you must be ready to go. I'll head that way."
"No Ash-"
"I'm already on the way!" Ali laughed. "Okay fine. See you in a bit."
Ashlyn turned back to face Kelley and Grace. "So sorry about that. Unfortunately something has come up and I have to go, but trust me when I say Kelley will be more than happy to take care of you." Kelley shot Ashlyn a look from behind Grace's back.
"Is everything okay?" Grace asked.
"She's fine, she just has to go pull her Prince Charming routine somewhere else. Let's sit down and talk about some ideas." Ashlyn hurriedly began to clean up her station as Kelley led Grace to the seating area. "I notice you have a piercing, why just the one?"
Grace glanced down with a shrug. "I wasn't paying attention one day when I was getting out of the shower. Snagged the barbell on my towel and ripped it straight out."
Kelley hissed. "Ouch. It heal up okay?"
She nodded. "Yeah, it's good now."
Ashlyn saw Kelley give her a grin. "Well, if you ever want to get it redone, come by. Piercings are actually my specialty."
Ash raised a hand. "Alright, I'm headed out. Don't burn the shop down while I'm gone."
"No promises! Say hi to Baker Girl for me!"
X
Ali had been apologetic as Ashlyn picked her up, saying that she really wasn't dressed to go anywhere, but Ashlyn thought she looked beautiful.
They'd ended up abandoning their original dinner plans, and had instead gotten tacos from a food truck. Ashlyn had made Ali laugh as she recounted some of her horror stories from work, and Ali had chimed in with some of the worst events she'd provided cakes for, including a wedding where the newly married groom made a pass at the maid of honor.
After they'd eaten, they spent a bit of time walking around the area before Ashlyn had an idea. She led Ali back to the jeep, refusing to answer any questions as she drove across town.
"Wait... are you serious?"
Ashlyn just grinned as she turned off the car. "Dead serious."
Ali stared up at the arcade. "I haven't been to one of these in... years. Maybe junior high."
"Well if you think I'm going to take it easy on you during laser tag, you are sadly mistaken." Ali laughed and followed her inside.
They started with a few games of air hockey, deciding to call it quits when Ali accidentally threw her paddle at the table next to them as she tried to block the puck Ashlyn sent her way. Ashlyn couldn't imagine her looking more adorable than she did apologizing to a dad and his son, her cheeks pink.
From there they decided to try out mini golf, something Ashlyn was disappointed to find out she really wasn't any good at. Her date seemed to be breezing through each hole, then having to wait as Ashlyn racked up ten, eleven, twelve shots before finally hitting the ball into the hole.
"I'm pretty sure I won," Ali laughed as they turned in their golf clubs.
"What? No, that was definitely a tie game."
Ali raised an eyebrow. "Oh really? Because we can always tally up our scores, see how they compare-"
"No, no," Ashlyn said hurriedly, pulling Ali's card from her hand as she threw an arm around her shoulder. "Let's just move on to the next game, shall we?"
The next game ended up being glow in the dark laser tag, where it quickly became apparent that they had both been trying to conceal their competitive natures. They were on the same team, playing with a group of coworkers on a bonding excursion, and it took very little before they were both sprinting around the dimly lit ramps and corridors. Just as Ash rounded a corner, she was shot by a member of the blue team, and she staggered dramatically back into Ali.
"I've... been... hit." Ali peered around the corner and fired at the other player, just managing to tag him.
"You've been avenged," she said with a grin.
Ashlyn couldn't help herself. She hooked a finger into Ali's vest and pulled her into a kiss. It was nothing inappropriate, but it was decidedly more charged than their first kiss. Ali's hand came up to tangle in Ashlyn's hair, but they were startled apart as Ali's vest began to beep, signalling that she had been shot. Ash leaned around her and fired back, but the opposing player ducked out of sight. She grinned at Ali.
"To be continued?"
Ali smirked back. "Only if we win."
X
Ashlyn insisted on playing Queen's We Are the Champions on repeat as she drove back to her apartment, throwing her head and arms around as she sang along. Ali just laughed in the passenger seat, bobbing her head along as she held the small stuffed cat that she had selected as her prize for winning. Even once Ashlyn put the jeep in park and turned it off, she kept singing a capella as she took Ali's hand in hers and led her to her house.
"This is a cute place," she told Ash as she kicked off her shoes by the front door.
"Thanks! It was a little bit of a shit hole when I moved in, but I've put in some work. Just little things, like restoring the wood floors and changing light fixtures, but it really feels like home."
Ali smiled. "Aren't you gonna give me the grand tour?"
She did, pulling out her inner Vanna White as she showed Ali the living room, kitchen, bedroom, and bathroom before bringing her back to the couch.
"And now, time for our celebratory drink."
"Oh are we breaking out the champagne?" Ali joked.
"Close." She held up a bottle. "Can I interest you in a Jack and Coke?"
"That's not close at all."
"It's not, my apologies."
"I'll take a Jack and Diet, if you have it."
Ashlyn gave her fridge a quick peek. "Mmm... upon further inspection, it seems that I shouldn't have even offered you normal Coke."
Ali grinned. "On the rocks is fine."
Ashlyn fixed them both a drink and came to sit beside her. "Did you have fun?"
"I really did. Thank you."
"Don't mention it." She scooted a bit closer. "Now if I remember correctly, I was promised a continuation if we won, and I followed through on my end of the bargain."
Without another word, Ali brought her lips to Ashlyn's, kissing her as if there was no tomorrow. Hands began to fist in clothing, both of them knowing that they should really slow down, but neither being able to ignore the level of attraction they felt for each other any longer. Ali shifted closer, trying to press her chest more tightly to Ashlyn's, and was pulled so that she was straddling Ashlyn's lap.
"God you're beautiful," Ash said as she pulled away to look at her, and Ali blushed.
"You are too." Her eyes flitted over Ashlyn as if she couldn't pick a favorite feature to focus on. "I can't get enough of you."
Ashlyn began to kiss and lick at her neck, groaning when she hit the just right spot that made Ali grind more harshly into her. She pulled away to look her in the eyes.
"Would you... would you want to spend the night? I mean, I'm not saying anything has to happen, I'll even sleep on the couch and give you the bed if you want. But if you didn't want to go to Alex's, you could stay."
"You really wanna stay on the couch?" Ali asked with a smirk.
"No, I want to be wherever you are." She pressed a kiss to Ali's jaw. "But I'll sleep on the couch if you want."
Ali cupped her jaw with both hands, pulling her so that their foreheads were touching. "Neither of us are sleeping on the couch." She met Ashlyn for another heated kiss then pulled away. "Wait."
"What's wrong?"
She pulled her phone out of her back pocket."I need to text Alex. If I don't show up tonight she's going to assume I've been murdered."
"Murdered?"
Ali smiled. "Her husband travels a lot for work, so she watches a lot of dateline."
"I see."
Ali finished typing out the message then threw her phone towards the other end of the couch. "Now, where were we?"
Ashlyn let her hands play up Ali's thighs. "I think we were discussing how no one was sleeping on the couch."
"Mm right." Ali made her way to standing, much to Ash's dismay. "Then I think we should both move towards the bedroom, don't you?"
Ash just gave her a grin, before standing up and kissing her again, slowly leading her to bed.

Chapter Text

 Ali slowly came to consciousness, her eyebrows furrowing as she found herself staring at an unfamiliar wall. She twisted around to glance behind her, her eyes falling on the face of none other than Ashlyn Harris, her mouth wide open. A sleepy grin pulled at her lips as memories from the night before began to filter back through her mind. The sex had been mind blowing; hands pressing into heated skin, mouths kissing and licking every inch they could reach, Ali was pretty sure she had almost blacked out at one point. But more incredible than that was the time they had spent just lying together in Ashlyn’s bed between rounds. With their legs tangled together, they had talked about anything and everything that crossed their minds.

Chapter Text

When Pinoe had called with free tickets to the Washington Nationals, Ashlyn had jumped at the chance to go. Sure, she wasn't a huge baseball fan, but she liked most sports, and hanging out and consuming her weight in hot dogs and beer was her idea of a perfect evening.

"How did you guys even get these seats?" she marveled as they settled in, just feet behind the batter's box.

"Perks of marrying a hot shot sports journalist," Pinoe grinned, her waggling eyebrows barely visible behind her black sunglasses.

Sue leaned around her fiancee. "I hooked up one of our baseball reporters with tickets whenever the Mystics played the LA Sparks, and now he's returning the favor." Sue had been the Washington Post's head reporter for Women's basketball for several years, but still managed to downplay just how cool her job was.

"Well, keep it up, this view is incredible. My inner boujie bitch is loving this. And that private bar is right up my alley."

"Speaking of things being up your alley..."

"Megan..." Ashlyn heard Sue laugh from the other side.

"How's Baker Girl?"

Ash grinned. "Baker Girl is amazing."

"I can't believe she agreed to go on a second date with you."

Ashlyn gave her a face of mock outrage. "Excuse you! I'll have you know, we already have date three penciled in for next week."

"Popcorn! Get your popcorn! Get your popcorn right here!"

"Ooh I could go for some popcorn," Megan exclaimed, flagging the snack hawker down. 

"We just ate fifteen minutes ago," Sue reminded her.

"Yeah, but popcorn barely even counts as food." She handed over a five and settled back in with her red and white striped box. Ashlyn reached over and shoved her hand in. 

"Hey, get your hand outta my box!"

"That's what she said," Ash cracked.

Pinoe lowered her sunglasses and gave Ash a smirk. "Oh yeah? Is that what Baker Girl told you last Friday?"

Ashlyn's cheeks flushed at the memory of Ali laid out on her bed. "Definitely not."

The man in front of them twisted around. "Are you girls going to talk the whole game? Some of us actually came to watch."

"Sorry," Ashlyn said, but as soon as he turned around she and Pinoe immediately made faces at his back, earning a slap to the shoulder from Sue.

"Be good, you two, or I'm not going to be able to get us tickets again."

Pinoe leaned back in her seat, draping an arm around Sue. "Baby, I'm always good."

"You're always a mess, you mean."

"Rude."

Sue gave her a soft grin and a peck on the lips. "Am I wrong?"

"Nah."

Ashlyn's phone vibrated, and she pulled it out, expecting a message from Kelley or Ali. Instead, her brother's name was at the top of the screen.

'Call when you can'

It was quickly followed by another text.

'Shits hitting the fan'

She groaned and stood up. "Bathroom?" Pinoe asked.

"No, I just got a message from Chris, saying that shits going down. I'm gonna give him a quick call."

"Are you sure you want to call now?" Having grown up just a few houses down from Ashlyn, she was pretty well acquainted with her family and everything it entailed. "Why don't you wait until after the game?"

Ashlyn shrugged as she scooted past both of them to the aisle.

"No. If I don't call him now I'll just be thinking about it all nine innings."

She made her way to the outer hallway, hearing a crack from behind her and a roar, letting her know that the Nats had just got their first hit. She pressed call and brought her phone to her ear. Chris answered after just two rings.

"Sissy."

"What's up? Is everything alright?"

He sighed. "Is it ever alright?"

"What happened?"

"Mom and Dad got in a fight."

"Okay, that's nothing new."

"Well, they got in a fight when she came to the bar-"

"Shit-"

"-and she ended up threatening to burn it down, with him inside."

"God, she really doesn't fuck around, does she?"

"Where do you think you we got our anger issues from?"

She gave a ghost of a grin before clearing her throat. "So what happened?"

"The usual. She screamed, he yelled, they both threatened each other, but some of the patrons overheard and ended up calling the police."

"Fuck."

"Yeah. So the cops came, and they were more than familiar with who Mom and Dad were, and thankfully neither of them were arrested, but they're both pissed as hell. And Dad's decided he's going to file for divorce."

"What- are you kidding me?"

"Yeah. So Mom's been crying all day, and she showed up at Grandma's plastered."

"Oh God. What did Grandma do?"

"Brought her inside, made her eat and drink something that wasn't alcohol. But the whole thing is just a clusterfuck."

"When Dad cools down, he'll forget he even wanted a divorce."

Chris sighed. "I don't know. Maybe. He was pretty mad."

"They've been threatening to divorce each other since before we were even born."

"Yeah, but that bar is his baby. Plus..."

"What?"

"Okay, don't tell Mom, and definitely don't tell Grandma, but I think he has a girlfriend."

"What?!" Ashlyn brought a hand to her forehead. Her parents had a complicated relationship to be sure, but as far as she knew neither one had ever cheated.

"I don't know for certain, it's just the last few times I was at the bar, he was awfully friendly with one of the servers that's working there."

Ashlyn picked up on something in his voice. "How old is she?"

"Maybe 21."

"Goddamnit."

"I know. And I'm sorry to call and dump all of this on you when you're not here, but I just wanted to keep you in the loop."

"No, definitely. Especially because I'm sure I'll be getting a call from Mom."

"Probably."

"Okay. Well... I'm actually at a baseball game, I better let you go."

"Oh hell, Ash, I didn't mean you had to call me right now. It could have waited."

"Nah, it's better I know. Text me if anything else happens."

"Will do. Love you, Sissy."

"Love you, too. Talk to you later."

Pinoe studied Ashlyn as she scooted by them to her seat. "Everything good?"

She sighed. "They got in a fight, the cops got called, he might be having an affair... just another day in the Harris house."

Pinoe squeezed her knee. "I'm sorry, dude. Here," she extended the popcorn to her best friend. "Put your hand in my box, it'll make you feel better."

Ashlyn gave a barking laugh in spite of herself, taking a handful of popcorn while feeling grateful for the goofball she called a best friend.

X

 She had invited Ali over to her house for dinner and a movie. She'd meant to have everything pretty much ready when Ali arrived, but that plan had quickly deteriorated, and by the time she got there she was strongly considering ordering a pizza.

"I think we can save this," Ali assured her as she stirred the rice dish.

"I think it might be beyond all help."

Ali kissed her cheek and swung a dishtowel over her shoulder. "Oh ye of little faith. Get me a cutting board."

"Oooh bossy pants Ali is coming out."

"More like Supergirl Ali is coming to save your ass," she teased.

The music on Ashlyn's phone cut out as it began to vibrate. She looked over to see her mom was calling. She quickly hit ignore and grabbed the cutting board from the cabinet, handing it over.

"What else can I do?"

"Do you have any onions?"

"Uh... maybe, let me-" The music cut out again and Ashlyn bit back an irritated sigh. 

"You can take the call."

She looked over at Ali. "No, we're spending time together right now, I don't wanna-"

Ali pressed a quick kiss to her lips. "You're fine, Ash. It could be important. Plus this will give me a chance to ransack your pantry."

"Okay." She grabbed her phone and pressed answer. "Hello?" She walked out of the kitchen. 

"Hi sweetie." She could hear the tears in her mother's voice.

"What's up?"

"I guess you've heard?"

"About you and Dad?"

"Can you believe this? After everything we've been through, he's just going to throw it all away. And he won't even tell me why!"

Ashlyn took a deep breath. "Well, it sounds like it's because you threatened to burn down the bar."

"I didn't mean it, Ashlyn, you know I would never do that. God, no one understands how it feels, we've been together all these years..."

"I know, Mom, I just... give it a few days. He'll calm down. You both will."

"He's breaking my heart, Ashlyn," she sobbed drunkenly.

Ash couldn't help but roll her eyes. Part of her felt like a bad daughter, but years of dealing with her parents had hardened her to their dramatics.

"Maybe you should go to bed."

"I can't sleep when he's not here. I just lie awake for hours."

"Well I definitely don't think you should have anything else to drink."

A sharp exhale echoed through the phone. "I've barely even had anything. You always assume the worst about me."

"I... I've gotta go. But I think you should get some sleep, things will look better in the morning."

"Fine. I shouldn't have even bothered you."

"No Mom, I'm-"

"Forget it." She hung up.

Ashlyn sighed. There was no good way to handle her mom when she was like this.

"Everything okay?" 

Ashlyn turned to find Ali leaning against the doorway.

"Yeah! Yeah, sorry."

"Are you sure? You seem a little upset."

Ash forced a smile as she avoided Ali's eyes. "Everything is fine. Now what's the status on dinner?" Ali held out her hand and led Ashlyn back to the kitchen, where things were already beginning to smell better. "You're a goddess. How in the world did you salvage this?" Ashlyn asked as she stirred the pot.

"That's my little secret," Ali smirked, pushing herself up to sit on the counter. Ashlyn came to stand between her legs, placing a kiss on the tip of her nose followed by her lips.

"I'll get it out of you one way or another."

Chapter Text

“Megan and Sue are coming in for their tasting tomorrow,” Ali yawned. She was laid out on Ashlyn’s couch, her head in the other girl’s lap as they watched TV, reveling in a quiet Tuesday evening. Ash’s fingers combed through her hair and she hummed in contentment.
“I know. I had to stop Pinoe from double booking herself like four different times.”
“I’m excited to finally meet Sue.”
“Oh you’ll love her. She’s literally so chill. She gets to meet all kinds of famous athletes but it never goes to her head.”
“You said she played college basketball, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Is she crazy tall?”
Ashlyn laughed. “No, she’s about my height.”
“Mm.” Ali’s eyes were beginning to slowly inch shut as Ashlyn continued to play with her hair.
“Ali?”
“Yeah.”
“If you want, a few of us are getting together tomorrow night, nothing crazy. We’re just gonna grab a few beers, shoot some pool. Would you wanna come? Meet some of the gang?”
Ali’s eyes blinked open and she turned her head to meet Ashlyn’s gaze. “You want me to meet your friends?”
Ashlyn gave her a soft smile. “Yeah. Is that alright?”
Butterflies whirled in Ali’s stomach. “Yeah. Yeah I would like that.”
“Awesome. Around seven, I can pick you up.”
“Okay.” Ali pushed herself to sitting. “I should probably head home.”
“Do you wanna just sleep here? I can loan you something to wear.”
She laughed and kissed Ashlyn’s cheek. “Somehow I’ve never needed sleep clothes when I’ve stayed over.” She stood up. “No, I should stay at my place tonight. But if you want… maybe you could stay at my place tomorrow night?”
Ashlyn grinned, following Ali as she walked towards the front door. “Finally. I didn’t think you were going to ever invite me over. I was starting to think you actually lived in the bakery.”
“Maybe I do,” Ali quipped. “Maybe I have a cot in the kitchen that we can share.”
Ash smiled, pulling her into a hug. “Sounds cozy.”
“More like sounds sticky.”
“You say that like we wouldn’t end up nice and sticky anyways.” She gave Ali’s ass a light squeeze, chuckling when her words and actions made Ali blush.
“I’ll see you tomorrow at seven?”
“I’ll be there.”
X
“Megan! So nice to see you again.” She was a little surprised when Megan immediately pulled her in for a hug.
“Baker girl! We meet again.”
Ali gave a wide smile as she pulled back, turning to the taller woman standing behind her. “And you must be Sue.”
“Yup, I’m the groom.”
Ali rolled her eyes and groaned as the other two laughed. “How many times can I apologize?”
“No, I’m just teasing you. I won’t bring it up again, I promise. Yeah, I’m Sue.”
“It’s nice to meet you.”
“Likewise. I’ve heard so much about you.”
Ali’s cheeks warmed at the words; what exactly had Ashlyn and Megan said?
“Well if you two want to take a seat, I’ll be right back with the samples.”
An hour seemed to fly by, the three of them discussing the merits of each cake flavor. They finally settled on a three-layer cake with two layers of classic chocolate cake and a middle layer of lemon, separated by raspberry ganache and covered with a vanilla buttercream frosting, which Megan had insisted had to be pink so that ‘it matches.’ She refused to elaborate further on the subject.
Once that was settled Ali brought out a second box and handed Sue a cupcake. “You need to try this.” She watched as the woman bit into it, her eyes lighting up.
“Oh my god… Oh my… are you serious? Are you kidding me right now?”
Ali grinned at her reaction. “So I take it those will do for the bridal shower?”
“Fuck the bridal shower, I want one of these every day for the rest of my life.”
“Megan specifically requested those for you.”
“Oh baby. Love of my life. This is why we’re getting married.” She leaned over and gave Megan a kiss, making Ali smile. She loved seeing couples who truly loved each other interact.
Megan gave a satisfied grin. “Did I tell you, or what?”
“You really did.”
Sue swiped some of the marshmallow puff off the top. “What else will be served?”
“We’ll have coffee and water obviously, the smores cupcakes, some basic cookies and shortbreads to balance out the sweetness.”
“No booze?” Megan cracked.
“That’s up to you,” Ali grinned. “I unfortunately don’t have the license required to serve alcohol, but you guys can serve anything you want.”
“We’ll put Ashlyn on that, her and KO will get everyone nice and boozed up!”
Sue shook her head. “I think that’s a horrible idea. We want people to remember attending our shower.”
She shrugged. “Fine. They can be in charge of the alcohol content at my bachelorette party.”
Ali crossed her arms on the table and leaned forward. “So are you guys doing separate parties then? What’s the protocol?”
“Yeah, I think we’ll do separate parties. I’ll go out with some of my girls from college, we’ll get pretty lit but generally under control. Meg will go out with Ash and the rest and I can only imagine pull off something to rival The Hangover.”
Megan just smiled. “My lips are sealed.”
“Okay, well I think we have everything settled for now. I’ll be in touch via email about where and when you want everything dropped off, and I can stay on site to help serve as well.”
“I mean, you can definitely stay but I figured it would be to keep Ashlyn in line.”
“So she doesn’t do spike the punch or something equally on brand,” Sue added.
“Oh no,” Ali deflected as her cheeks flushed. “I don’t want to overstep. It’s your bridal shower, after all. It should just be your nearest and dearest, celebrating your love for each other.”
Megan shrugged as she leaned back in her chair. “You’re coming to the pool hall tonight, right?” Ali nodded. “Welcome to the nearest and dearest. We’re very exclusive.”
“Obviously,” Ali smiled. “Do you have any other questions for me?”
Both women shook their heads as they stood up, Megan pulling her in for another back slappy hug. “We’ll see you tonight?”
Ali nodded with a somewhat nervous smile. “I’ll be there.”
“Nice. We’ll catch you there.” Sue gave her a fist bump and the two made their way out of the shop.
“Where are you going tonight?”
Ali turned to find Christen behind the register, giving her a look as she scrolled away on her phone.
“That’s for me to know,” she teased back. “And get off your phone!”
X
By all accounts, meeting Ashlyn’s friend group had gone great. Ali had finally been able to put a face to the crazy Kelley O’Hara from Ashlyn’s stories. Megan and Sue had been there, as promised. She also met several others like Heather, Diana, Julie, and Crystal, along with their respective partners. It was a fun night, full of good-natured teasing back and forth. Ali was thankful that she had a steadfast reason to nurse one drink throughout the entire night; it was clear to see that once this group got going they could get a little crazy.
Ashlyn kept pace with her, opting for the one beer. She sat on one of the tall stools beside the pool table they had claimed and pulled Ali to stand between her legs. She wrapped her arms around her, and Ali leaned her back against Ashlyn’s chest. She whispered tidbits of information about her friends in Ali’s ear as they all talked. This landed her in hot water when she told Ali about Kelley having to get stitches when she fell of a bar she had been dancing on one night and Kelley had looked over at Ali’s giggles.
“Wait, are you really telling the Hi-Tide story right now? Fuck you!”
“Fuck me?! Bitch, we told you to get off the bar!” Ashlyn laughed back.
Kelley held up her hands. “In my defense, I’d had at least four of their mojitos, David Bowie was on, and if I remember correctly, we were celebrating the fact that you didn’t get hauled off to jail!”
“What?” Ali asked, turning her head to look at Ashlyn.
“It- no- It was nowhere as bad as she’s making it sound.”
“It was every bit as bad as it sounds,” Heather cut in.
“I’m being targeted,” Ashlyn said with a fake sniff.
Kelly cleared her throat. “We were out at a different bar and this giant ass guy-“
“He wasn’t that big-“
“Hush HAO, let me tell this. We were out drinking, just the three of us because Dave was… I don’t remember where Dave was,” she said with a wave of her hand.
“He was at his cousin’s bachelor party-“
“Do you want to tell the story?”
Heather laughed and rolled her eyes. “I’m so sorry, please continue.”
“So three of us are out at the bar, having a girls’ night, and this dude comes up and just WILL NOT leave HAO alone. Touching her arm, trying to buy her a drink, can’t take a hint. I’m like hey dude, you need to back off, but also, I’m only nineteen, I’m not even supposed to be in the bar, so I’m being quiet about it. But then, THEN-”
“He grabs my ass.”
“Heather!” Kelley rolled her eyes. “You’re making this impossible. But yeah, he grabs her ass. And out of nowhere, Ashlyn, who had been… hitting on one of the waitresses?”
“I had been in the bathroom!”
“Yeah, getting down with the waitress.” Ashlyn brought a hand up to cover her face and Ali couldn’t help but laugh at how flustered and embarrassed she was. “Anyways, Harris comes out of nowhere with this mean right hook. Just fucking clocks the guy. Knocks him out cold.”
“What?!” Ali exclaimed as the group of friends all start laughing at the story they’ve all heard a hundred times.
“Needless to say, the bar is not happy with us. The guy is on the ground, the bouncer has Ashlyn pinned against the wall, yelling about how they’re gonna call the cops, when HAO, sweet little Heather Ann O’Reilly, grabs the guy’s arm and starts sweet talking him. Just, ‘Oh please don’t call the cops, she was just defending me, you get it, you would never grab a girl’s ass right?’ and this guy goes from irate to in love in like… four seconds flat. All of a sudden he has an arm around HAO’s back, asking if she’s okay, how the guy should never have touched such a beautiful woman, can he do anything for her, here take his number.’ And Heather is just, little miss Gone With the Wind, her eyelashes fluttering and everything. It was insane. And so he tells Ashlyn that he’s cool with her, she was just defending her girl, but that she’s banned for three months and all of us need to get out before the cops show up.”
“Which we did. Very quickly.” Heather laughed.
“And so we went to Hi-Tide to celebrate the fact that I wasn’t going to be arrested and Kelley got so drunk that she got up on the bar to dance and promptly fell off, smacking her head and earning a trip to the ER where she got sixteen stitches,” Ashlyn finished.
“That was crazy from beginning to end!” Ali laughed.
Ashlyn squeezed her a little tighter. “We definitely got into our fair share of mischief in our early twenties. But we’ve settled down a bit. Well, most of us anyway,” she said, lightly kicking towards Kelley, who promptly gave her the finger.
Everyone had been so nice and welcoming to Ali that she was sad when it was time for her and Ash to head out. But once they got back to her apartment, she was suddenly very glad to have her alone, and quickly steered her towards her bedroom.
Afterwards, as they lay tangled up in Ali’s sheets, she rested her head against Ashlyn’s chest, listening to the steady thrum of her heart.
“Your friends are all so cool,” she murmured.
“All crazy you mean,” she chuckled.
“I had a great time tonight.”
“So when are you going to return the favor?”
“What do you mean?”
“When will I get to meet your friends?”
Ali ignored the jolt of panic deep in her stomach. “I don’t really have that many if I’m being honest. I mean, I work all the time. I have my brother but he’s all the way in California.”
“What about Alex?”
Ali gave a very forced chuckle. “She’s too nosy for her own good. She would never leave you alone.” She turned her head and nestled her nose into Ashlyn’s neck.
“Ali?”
“Mhm?”
“Why don’t you want me to meet your friends?”
“Ash, it’s fine, let’s talk about this tomorrow.” But she could tell by how tense Ashlyn was becoming beneath her that it wasn’t fine.
“Are you… embarrassed of me?”
Ali pushed up on her elbow so that she could peer at Ashlyn through the darkness. “What? No, of course not!”
“Then what’s the problem? Why can’t I meet them?”
“It’s, it’s not that-” Ali dragged a hand down her face. “Ash, it’s just complicated, okay?”
“What’s complicated, Ali? I mean, we’ve been seeing each other. Alex knows we went on the date to the arcade, and I’m sure you guys have talked about the other dates. I’m not saying it has to be some big thing.”
“It’s not that simple!”
“Didn’t you tell Alex you went out with me?”
“I mean… I, yes, I did-”
“Wait.” The air was thick between them as Ashlyn pushed herself to sitting, pulling slightly away from Ali. “She knows you went on a date… does she know it was with a woman?”
Ali’s breath caught in her chest, and her stomach ached so badly that for a moment she was sure she would vomit.
“I don’t… she just assumed, and I, I didn’t…”
“Are… are you not out?” Ali didn’t know how to respond, so instead she just sat there in the deafening silence. Ashlyn stared blankly ahead from a moment. “Fucking unbelievable.” She threw back the sheets and got out of the bed, quickly gathering up her clothes from where they had been thrown.
“Ash, it’s not that I don’t, that I don’t want, it’s just, you don’t understand!”
Ashlyn whirled around to face where Ali had risen up on her knees on the bed. “Oh, I understand perfectly.” And she turned on her heel and stormed from the room, slamming Ali’s door as she let herself out of the apartment.
Ali sank back onto the mattress, her sheets still warm from their shared body heat. How had this happened? Everything had been going so well; how did she manage to fuck it up so badly?

Chapter Text

Once Ashlyn was in her Jeep, she lashed out at the steering wheel, pummeling it until she accidentally hit the horn. The noise frightened a cat that had been leisurely crossing the street, making it streak away into the darkness. Ashlyn leaned forward, gasping for breath as the white-hot anger coursed through her body.

Of course Ali wasn’t out. Of course not. This had been going so well, she’d been an idiot not to see this coming. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to remember the de-escalation tactics she’d learned over years of therapy and anger management, but her mind refused to cooperate, instead echoing with the memory of the hesitation in Ali’s voice, the shame, the guilt, until she shifted the car into drive.

She needed a fucking drink.

She couldn’t go back to the pool hall. She didn’t want everyone to see what a wreck she was. She just wanted to get shit faced and not think about the way her night had gone up in flames. Her phone began to ring, the screen lighting up with Ali’s name and picture, one she had just taken a few days ago. She hit ignore.

She ended up at a dive bar near her house. It was surprisingly still populated for a late Wednesday night, but Ash was able to snag a seat at the bar next to a couple who were deep in conversation. She ordered a whiskey from the bartender as her phone began to ring in her pocket again. She pulled it out and ignored Ali’s call, then texted Kelley and asked her to come to the bar. She knew she could call Pinoe, that her best friend would be more than willing to come and pick up her shattering pieces, but she didn’t want to see the ‘I told you so’ that would be not quite hidden in her eyes.

The glass was placed in front of her and she immediately downed it.

The bartender raised an eyebrow as he regarded her. “Rough night?”

“You could fucking say that again. I’ll take another. Actually, give me two.”

“Let’s start with one.” He gave it to her and made his way to the other end of the bar.

She took a drink, savoring the burn in her throat, and let out a heavy sigh.

“Everything okay?” She turned to find the woman sitting next to her watching her carefully. “Sorry, I don’t mean to intrude, it’s just… you seem really upset.”

Ashlyn shook her head. “I’ll be fine. Didn’t mean to interrupt you and your boyfriend.”

The woman shrugged. “He’s in the bathroom. And between you and me, his lactose intolerant ass had all kinds of cheese for dinner even though I told him not to, so he’ll be in there for a while.” Something close to a smile pulled at Ashlyn’s lips. “So… Romantic problems?”

“What makes you say that?”

The woman cocked her head to the side. “It’s the only thing that can make someone down a whiskey neat instead of sipping it.”

Ashlyn sighed, the words bubbling up in her chest before she could stop them. “I’ve been seeing someone for several weeks now. And everything was great, I thought we were going places… and tonight I found out she’s not out to anyone. And I… I’m obviously not going to force her to do anything, but also we’re fucking adults. I’m not going to sneak around like we’re in high school, and it’s unreasonable to ask me to!”

She raised her eyebrows. “She asked you to sneak around?”

Ashlyn had to pause for a moment. “Well… no. But she doesn’t want me to meet any of her friends. And what kind of relationship are we supposed to have if we can’t share things together?” She downed the rest of the whiskey to try and push back the tears crowding her throat. “And I get it, y’know? She has a job, a business, she has a reputation or whatever. She cares about what people think about her. But also it’s 20 fucking 19! People aren’t going to boycott her bakery because she’s gay! Or… I mean I thought she was gay. I don’t know. She sure fucks like a gay girl, but what the hell does that mean in all this…” The anger and alcohol were combining dangerously to loosen her tongue, allowing her to pour out her heart to this stranger.

“Is she religious?”

Ashlyn shrugged. “I mean… she was raised here in Virginia, so probably.”

“Maybe that’s part of it.”

“Who the hell knows?”

Her phone began to vibrate on the bar, and she flipped it over to see it was once again Ali. She hit ignore, signaling for another whiskey.

“That’s her?”

Ashlyn turned her head to see the woman’s eyes trained on her phone. “Yeah. Beautiful, right?”

“She’s gorgeous,” the woman agreed softly. She seemed to be thinking very hard on something. “Maybe it’s her family.”

Ashlyn snorted. “Her brother’s gay, so probably not. No, Ali’s just being a fucking coward.” The words fell from her lips, hard and pointed as nails. She knew she was being a bitch, but she just wanted the hot throb of shame to disappear from her chest.

“Ash. Ashlyn!” She turned over her shoulder to see Kelley strolling over, a wide smile on her face. “What are you doing here, where’s… what happened?” As she got closer, she picked up on the dark energy rolling off of Ashlyn like storm clouds.

“What you all said would happen.” She barely even had the energy to be embarrassed as the tears she had been ignoring began to fall down her cheeks.

“Aw dude… let’s get you home, okay? I’ll get you paid out.” Kelley leaned around her and tried to get the bartender’s attention.

Ashlyn got to her feet, her legs unsteady. “Sorry again for ruining your evening,” she told the woman on the stool next to her.

“Not at all. I’m glad we got to talk. What was your name?”

“Ashlyn.”

She held out her hand. “Becky. Nice to meet you.”

They shook hands and Kelley turned to Ashlyn. “Alright, time to get you home before you do something stupid, kay?”

“Kay.”

They began to make their way to the door. “Ashlyn?” She turned to find her new friend standing behind her.

“Yeah?”

“I just… I know you don’t know me, and I don’t know you, but… Don’t give up on her. She seems… like a really great person, and so do you, and I’m sure there’s more to the story than she’s letting on. And you obviously care a lot about her, or you wouldn’t be this upset. And I think she… you deserve to be happy. Don’t give up so easy.” She swept her long blond hair back over her shoulder. “Yeah. Don’t give up on Ali.”

Something deep inside Ashlyn was touched and she reached out and patted the woman’s shoulder. “Thanks,” she said softly.

“Becky?”

She turned to look over her shoulder. “Be right there, Zola.” She looked back at Ash. “Anyway. Have a good night. Get her home safe,” she told Kelley.

“Will do. Alright, Harris. Let’s get you to the car. And we’ll stop and get some food on the way home, hm? Maybe some Taco Bell? Burger King?”

Ashlyn shrugged as Kelley steered her out of the bar. “Whatever.”

X

“This is your master plan?”

Ashlyn didn’t look at Pinoe. What do you mean?”

“This. You sitting on your couch, wasting away, flipping back and forth between her Instagram and the bakery’s Instagram, trying to figure out what she’s doing while ignoring all of her texts and calls.”

“Fuck off,” Ashlyn grumbled.

“Look at me.” She reluctantly did so. “I’m not saying you don’t have a right to be upset. But you’re obviously not in a place where you can get over her. You need to talk to her and either get this shit straightened out or get some closure.”

“I… I don’t know what I would even say,” Ashlyn admitted.

“I think that conversation is gonna be more about what she says.” Pinoe leaned forward, her elbows resting on her knees. “I’m not saying it wasn’t a bullshit move, lying to her friend about the fact that she was dating a woman. But what I am saying is… well, maybe she had a good reason.”

“Like what?!”

“I don’t know!” Pinoe fired back. “I don’t know what her reasons were, and neither do you, and you won’t until stop sulking like a chicken shit and call her.”

Ashlyn sighed. She was right, of course. And how could reaching out be any worse than what she was currently doing? “Fine. The next time she reaches out, I’ll respond.”

Pinoe gave her a long hard stare then grabbed her phone out of her hand. Ashlyn tried to grab it back but she was already out of the armchair and across the living room. She unlocked it and quickly typed out a message, hitting send before tossing it back. Ashlyn looked down at the screen to see what she had sent.

‘Hey. Is there any way we can meet up and talk?’

She glared at her best friend. “What the fuck, Pinoe?”

“It’s for the best.”

Her phone vibrated in her hand.

‘Yes. I need to explain. Can I come over to your place in thirty?’

She sighed, typing out an affirmative response. She looked up at Pinoe. “Alright, well she’ll be over in thirty. Get out of here so I can shower.”

“Good, you smell.” Ashlyn grabbed one of the pillows from the couch and lobbed it at her head. “Seriously though, you shower, I’m gonna straighten up and take out your trash. She doesn’t need to see your place like this.”

Ashlyn pulled her into a hug. “Have I told you lately that you’re a great friend?”

“Nope. Thankfully, I already know. Now seriously, shower.”

“Okay.”

X

She opened the door to find Ali on her doorstep. Her hair was up in a bun and her makeup was flawless as usual, but it wasn’t quite enough to hide the shadows under her eyes. Her bottom lip was caught in between her teeth.

“Hi.”

“Hey.” She stepped back, letting her inside.

Ali made her way to the living room but didn’t sit down, instead hovering nervously on the edge of the rug.

“Do you want something to drink?” She shook her head, so Ashlyn gestured to the couch. They both sat down, and silence engulfed them.

“Thank you for texting me,” Ali whispered finally.

“I… didn’t. Pinoe did.” Ali seemed to shink even further into herself. “Not that I didn’t want to. I was just upset. Hurt.”

Ali nodded. “And I get that. You have every right to be.”

“So… are you gay or not?” Ali dropped her head, staring at her knees, and frustration rose in Ashlyn’s chest. “If you’re not going to talk to me, then I don’t know why-”

“No, I… I’m here to talk.” She took a deep breath. “I… like women. Obviously.” She attempted a smile but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “From the first time I kissed another girl, I have. But… I also like men. I’ve dated several over the years. I… like both.”

Ashlyn gave something close to a snort. “So you’re bi?”

Ali gave a shrug. “I guess. Yeah. I generally don’t use that word, but yeah.”

“Well what word do you want to use then?”

“Ali,” she snapped back. “I’m just Ali, and I like what I like, I don’t know why everyone insists on me having to provide a label past that.”

Ashlyn started to give a sarcastic reply, but she could see by the look in Ali’s eye that they were in dangerous territory. “So… even if you don’t want to label yourself one way or another… why aren’t you out? I mean, it’s not like this is the 60s. Your friends and family deserve to know what’s in your heart. I mean, you have an openly gay brother, what’s the big deal?“

“Because I already had to live through the aftermath of him coming out,” Ali gasped. Tears were gathering in her eyes, and Ashlyn reached for her hand but she pulled away. “I don’t know what it was like when you came out to your family, but for some people it doesn’t go well, okay?”

“But… what do you mean?”

“Have you ever wondered why my brother, my best friend, lives across the fucking country? He came out in high school and it was a shit show. My parents were… they were terrified that someone would find out. They treated it like the dirtiest, most shameful secret on earth.” A heavy weight settled deep in Ashlyn’s stomach. For all of her parents’ faults, they had taken her sexuality in stride, barely even needing to address it.

“And then… he got caught, with an older guy. Word got around, my grandparents found out. They wanted to send him to… to one of those pray the gay away camps. My Grandpa inisisted…” She choked out a sob. “He said Kyle was sick. That… all the fags… were sick. That they weren’t right in the head. And that they either needed to turn to God, or be put down.”

Ashlyn gasped. She’d heard about people who felt that way. Hell, there were all kinds of horror stories in the news, ones that made her feel sick. But she’d never met someone personally.

“Did he go?”

Ali shook her head. “He ran away. Just… left in the middle of the night. I had no idea where her was, if he was safe. He ended up getting into drugs, spending all of his days drunk and high, doing god knows what. I tried to reach out, once I was in college, away from my parents, but he was in a bad place. He hit rock bottom my senior year, and thankfully my parents helped get him into rehab. I moved to San Fran to live with him and went to pastry school while he went to hair school. He’s… he’s doing so much better now, he’s clean. But there were years when he was as good as dead, all because of how our family and community reacted. All because he dared to be truthful about his sexuality.”

“Ali… oh my god. I’m so sorry. That… I had no idea.”

“So no, I haven’t exactly been clamoring to come out to my family. Sure, my grandfather isn’t around anymore, but what if my Meemaw took back the bakery? That’s my entire life, and she could take it away in an instant.” She wiped at her face. “it’s not… you. It’s not, Ash, I promise. I love spending time with you, and I don’t want to give that up. But you’ve gotta understand that… that I have a hell of a lot of things on the line.”

Ashlyn reached for her, and this time Ali let her pull her close. “You deserve to be loved and cherished for your differences,” she whispered.

“I’ve… always been the good girl. I worked hard in school, I was a three-sport athlete, I never broke curfew. I got into Penn State and worked my ass off. My role was to be he dependable one, to lessen the strain caused by everything Kyle was going through. I felt like… if I was good enough that he would get more freedom to live his life how he wanted. And to some extent, that's still how I live.”

“But when do you get to be happy? When does your freedom come?”

Ali’s tears renewed. “I don’t know.” She raised her head to look at Ash, their faces only inches apart. “I don’t want to lose you.”

Ashlyn’s heart broke, and she pulled her even closer. “I’m right here, Ali. I’m right here.”

Chapter Text

Weeks passed in the aftermath of their fight, and things settled back down into a rhythm. There were times when Ali could tell that Ashlyn was frustrated, but she was respecting her boundaries which Ali appreciated.

But as they spent more time together, Ali couldn't stop the growing anxiety that was constantly gnawing at her stomach. She'd thought she was over everything that happened with Kyle, that she'd put it to rest. But it seemed like now she was just waiting for the other shoe to drop, for someone to find out about her and Ashlyn, to rip her life away from her. In the end all she could do was keep working and pray that she was wrong.

She brought out a tray of cupcakes to find Christen and Rose giggling behind the cash register.

"Uh oh, what have you two gotten into?"

"Nothing," Christen quickly assured her, but the sparkle in her eye said otherwise.

Ali wiped her hands on her apron then folded her arms across her chest. "C'mon, out with it."

"Chris has a new Tinder match," Rose gushed, and the older girl turned and hit her on the arm. "Sorry!"

"Ooh!" Ali couldn't help but tease. "Someone cute, I'm guessing?"

"Someone she already knows."

"That should make things easier, right?" Ali had explored a bit on dating apps when she first got to college, but quickly grew bored of them.

"Well... in theory, it would, yeah."

Ali glanced back and forth between the two girls. "What am I missing?"

"It's my hair dresser."

Ali waited, but Christen didn't supply anything else. "Okay?"

"Well... it's my hair dresser and her boyfriend."

Ali's jaw dropped. "Oh! it's a... a female hair dresser. I guess I... I didn't know that you were..." she trailed off.

"I'm Pan," Chris offered with a shrug of one shoulder.

"Cool."  Cool? That's what you're going with Ali? Seriously? "What does that mean, exactly?"

"Pansexual. I'm not attracted to gender, really. It's more about the person's vibe, y'know?"

"Oh." She didn't know. Even after going to college and growing and exploring, after living in San Francisco for a year, one of the gayest cities in the US, she still very much felt like a stranger in the LGBT community. Will I ever feel like I belong?  She shook herself from her spiraling thoughts. "But you said she has a boyfriend?

"Yeah, they share the Tinder profile."

"They're looking for a unicorn," Rose smirked.

"A... what?!"

Chris rolled her eyes and put her coffee on the counter. "Okay so when a straight couple decides they want to have a threesome with another girl, sometimes they'll approach someone they know, but a lot of the time they find a bi or pan girl online, and she's called a unicorn."

"Oh wow, that's... that happens enough that there's a word for it. I guess... I thought it was more of a... pick up a girl in a bar or something." She thought for a second, wrapping her mind around the whole thing. "Wait so are you going to do it?"

"I don't know!"

"You have to do it! Please?! C'mon, do it for me, let me live through you!" Rose begged, her hands clasped in front of her.

"If you're so interested then you do it!" Christen shot back.

"Uh, let's not encourage the high school girls to try threesomes, Christen," Ali laughed.

Rose blushed bright red, her shoulders creeping up towards her ears. "No, I couldn't... I'm... ugh."

Christen and Ali both laughed at her embarrassment. "Well either way... be careful, Chris. That sounds a bit messy, I don't mean to be a mom-boss, but-" she cut herself off as Christen's face hardened momentarily. Christen's mother had passed away just after she graduated from college, and Ali knew that she was still grieving deeply. "I didn't... yeah. Any ways." She went back to the kitchen.

She found Alex kneading a ball of dough, pounding it into shape. She regarded her friend for a moment.

"Have you and Serv ever had a threesome?"

Alex looked up at her with a surprised grin. "A threesome? Are you kidding? I'm already too much woman for him to handle half the time," she cracked.

Ali rolled her eyes as she began to rinse out the bowl she had been using earlier. "Seriously though."

"Seriously no. I wouldn't be necessarily opposed, but I don't think Serv would have a good time. Why, have you?" Ali gave a snort, but didn't say anything.

Because she had.

It was just one weird night when she was living in Germany. She'd been out at a bar and had started chatting with a girl. Suddenly the girl's boyfriend had been there and they'd been dancing and then they'd been inviting her back to their apartment. She had been pretty drunk, all three of them had been, so the memories from the night were a little blurry, but she hadn't had a bad time. 

"Did you know that Christen is gay?" she asked suddenly. Alex straightened up.

"What?"

"Yeah, she's... pan. Pansexual. She just told me."

"Huh. Really?" Alex gave a shrug. "Well, I think most of the kids are gay now."

Ali rolled her eyes. "That's all you have to say?"

"Well... yeah. I mean, I want her to be happy and healthy. She deserves it, after everything that's happened. But I don't especially care."

"Yeah."

Alex walked over until she was standing right in front of Ali. "Is everything okay?"

Ali looked deep into Alex's eyes, her stomach churning. She could feel the words clawing their way up her throat, just on the tip of her tongue. I'm gay. I like girls and boys. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, I just didn't know how-

"Ali?" she asked gently.

"Hello? Where's my favorite granddaughter?"

Ali jerked backwards, her heart lurching in her chest. "Meemaw!" She forced a smile in place as her grandmother walked around the corner, her hair perfectly coiffed and her signature bright pink lipstick in place.

"How are you sweetheart?"

"I'm... good! Great! What are you doing here?"

"I was in the neighborhood, I thought I would stop in, see if I could steal you away for lunch?"

Ali glanced at Alex, who had returned to her dough. She grinned back at her. "I can take care of everything here, go."

"Are you sure?"

"Have fun!"

So Ali took off her apron and patted at her bun, then followed Miss Patty out the back door, thanking every star in the sky that she had kept her mouth shut.

X

A few days later, she was in the front, flipping through the scheduling binder when the bell jingled. "Hello, welcome to Patty Cakes," she called without looking up.

"Ali?"

She glanced away from the page in front of her to see a woman with long blonde hair standing at the counter. She quickly racked her brain, before connecting the face to a name. "Becky! Hi, how are you?"

She smiled, looking a little relieved that Ali knew who she was. "I'm great, how are you?"

"Keeping busy!" She shot her a smile. "Can I help you with something? How were your cookies?"

"Oh god. Delicious. I can't thank you enough."

"I'm so glad to hear that!"

Becky fiddled with the strap to her yoga mat. "I actually... God, okay this is going to sound so weird. But I have a group of friends, we meet up every Sunday night. We go out for a run, usually at one of the parks here in Alexandria, and then we all go out for a beer afterwards. It's a great way to end the weekend and get focused on the week ahead. And I was wondering if you would want to join us."

"Me?"

"Yeah! It's low pressure, some of us are pretty fast, but most of us are average at best. But it's nice to hang out," Becky shrugged.

"That's... so nice. I actually ran cross country and track growing up, but I haven't run in so long... That sounds like a lot of fun!"

"Great! We're running at Jones Point Park this week. We haven't picked a time yet, but I'll add you to the group chat."

"Okay! But Becky... Why did you come and invite me?"

She tilted her head to one side, giving her a strange look. "I want to be your friend."

Ali looked at her in surprise. "Oh!"

She gave a nervous laugh. "Sorry, is that weird to say? I just... You seem really cool, and you're obviously talented, and we're a great group of ladies. All walks of life. Different careers, different races and religions, Different sexualities. Everyone is accepted."

"Well... thanks. It'll be nice to run again. And meet more people my age. I pretty much just see Alex and the girls who work out front."

"Feel free to invite Alex along! As well as... any other friends you may have." There was that strange look again.

Ali laughed. "I don't know that Alex is much of a runner at the moment, but I'll ask."

"Great. Well, I'll add you to the chat, and I'll see you on Sunday."

"Okay! See you then!" She watched as Becky left the shop, her yoga mat swinging behind her. The entire interaction had been a little strange, but who was Ali to turn down the chance to make another friend?

X

Ali pushed open the door to the tattoo parlor, stepping out of the chilly Virginia air. She had never been in before, but found herself pleasantly surprised by the interior. It was a pleasant mix of vintage decor and modern amenities. Each station had antique salon chairs, seemingly straight out of the Victorian period. The walls were decorated with a mix of old black and white photographs as well as pictures of smiling clients showing off their new body art.

"Hey Ali!" She turned to see Kelley leaning against the counter. "What's up?"

"Not much," she smiled shyly. When she had met Ashlyn's friends at the pool hall, she had felt like they liked her and accepted her into their fold, but that was before the proverbial shit hit the fan. "How are you?"

"Bored." Kelley rolled her eyes. "Here to see Ash?"

"If she's not busy."

"Let me grab her." She disappeared through a pair of saloon doors, leaving Ali to browse the pictures on the walls. She was quickly drawn to a snapshot of Ashlyn standing proudly in nothing but a sports bra and a pair of boxers. She was missing several of the pieces Ali was accustomed to seeing on her body, but she was proudly pointing to the mermaid covering her thigh, the bright red skin surrounding it revealing that it had just been completed. Kelley was crouched in the corner of the picture, smiling widely, one arm flexed for the camera, the other pointing at Ashlyn's tattoo.

"Hey beautiful." She turned to see Ashlyn crossing the room.

"Hey there."

Ash bent and pressed a soft kiss to her cheek. "What are you up to?"

Ali shrugged. "I was just in the area, thought I would pop in."

Ash grinned. "Oh really? You were in Del Ray? Doing what exactly?"

Ali rolled her eyes. "Okay, I just wanted to see you."

"That's okay." Ashlyn gave her another kiss, this time on her lips. "You can come in anytime."

"I wouldn't want to distract you from your work."

"What work?" Ash asked sarcastically, gesturing around the empty shop.

"Where is everyone?"

"The million dollar question." Ashlyn leaned against the arm of one of the chairs. "We've had a few shops open in the area recently. They specialize in work that is fast and cheap, whereas we do work that is qood quality. But people don't always see the necessity of putting in more time and money for something you're going to love."

"Like this." Ali turned back to the picture she had been examining. "I didn't know that Kelley did your mermaid."

"She's done the vast majority of my work. She's fucking talented."

"And don't you ever forget it!!" Kelley yelled from the back, making both women laugh. 

Ashlyn moved to stand behind Ali, her arms wrapping loosely around her waist. "What about you? Getting any new ink soon?"

Ali nodded. "I've been thinking about it actually. I have an idea, it's just a matter of placement."

"You gonna let me do it?"

Ali couldn't resist giving her a smirk. "Nah, I think I'll take my chances with Kelley."

"You won't regret it!"

"Stop eavesdropping, you creep!" Ashlyn yelled back. 

Ali laughed and leaned further back into her. This felt right; this felt like where she was supposed to be.

Chapter Text

"It's not fair that I have to work another Saturday night by myself while you get to get laid," Kelley whined.

Ashlyn smirked at Kelley through the mirror as she styled her hair. "Well if you ever get off your ass and meet someone who wants to bang you then maybe I'll return the favor."

She gave her a look of mock outrage. "Excuse you, there are tons of people who want to hit this."

"I didn't say there aren't, I just meant that you won't find any of them on your couch."

"Maybe I was going to take Grace out tonight."

Ash turned back to face Kelley. "Oh really? You were going to take Angel Wings out?"

"Maybe."

She narrowed her eyes at the younger girl, deciding to call her bluff. "Call her. Put her on speakerphone. If she agrees to go out I will cancel my plans with Ali and stay at the shop."

Kelley searched for something to say before finally sulking in her chair. "Fine. I didn't have any plans for tonight. But I could have!"

"Sure, KO."

"So where are you guys going?"

"We're gonna grab a quick bite then go dancing."

"Are you gonna 'Step up 2 the Streets?'"

"Great movie."

"I know."

"The scene in the rain-"

"I know. My tiny gay heart couldn't handle it." Kelley fanned herself dramatically with her hand.

"But anyway, yeah, we're going to Pose."

"Shit, that'll be so much fun."

Ashlyn shot her a grin. "That's what I'm hoping."

"How are... things going with you guys?"

She shrugged. "The same. I mean, she's still terrified to come out because she was born into a family of dickbags. But we spend all of our time together. She's the first person I text when I wake up, the last person I think about as I'm going to bed."

"Woah, dude."

"What?"

"You guys... are you even girlfriends, yet?"

"What do you mean?"

"Are you dating or are you dating?"

"I... I don't know."

"Well are you seeing anyone else?"

"No."

"Why?"

Ashlyn snorted. "Because I don't want to."

"Is she?"

Ashlyn was pretty sure then answer to that question was no, but the idea of Ali seeing someone else made her heart flutter unpleasantly. "Kel, what's with the twenty questions?"

"I just... Ash, you're a big girl, I know you can handle yourself, but you also have a big heart. And I'm just worried that you're going to get hurt."

She dropped into the chair across from Kelley. "I might. I can't say I won't. But... I think it would be worth it. She's worth it."

"Have you guys talked about what exactly you are?"

She rubbed her hands up and down her thighs. "Not in so many words." Kelley took a deep breath as if to say something, but ultimately stayed quiet. "What?"

"Nothing. But you better head that way, you don't wanna be late. Again."

Ashlyn rolled her eyes and grinned. "No one's ever going to let me live it down."

"Not a chance."

X

One thing Ashlyn never had to worry about when she and Ali were out together was conversation. From the moment they were seated, it flowed back and forth as naturally as breathing. 

God she's beautiful when she laughs, she thought to herself as Ali threw back her head, her nose crinkling as she cracked up at a story Ashlyn had told.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Like what?"

"I don't know. Do I have something on my face?" Ali grinned.

Ashlyn leaned in slightly, dimpled grin firmly in place. "Hm, let me check..." She dipped her finger in the last of her mashed potatoes and quickly wiped it across Ali's cheek.

"Ash!" she squeaked, quickly bringing up her napkin to wipe it away.

"What? You asked, I was just trying to help," she replied, batting her eyelashes. "Here you have a little more-"

"Don't you dare!" Ali admonished, catching her wrist before she could wipe more food on her face. "We are not having a food fight in this restaurant."

"Aw, are you scared?"

Ali scoffed. "Please. I would totally win, but I don't want to get thrown out of this restaurant. Plus," she said, lowering her voice, "someone promised to take me out dancing, and I don't want anything to get in the way of that."

Ashlyn fought the urge to lean across and crash her lips to Ali's. "Maybe we should get the check then. Head that way."

"Sounds like a plan." As if on cue, the waiter stepped up with their bill in hand. They both reached for it, but Ali was quicker. "Ha! See, I would totally win in a food fight. I've got cat-like reflexes."

She plucked her credit card from her purse, placing it in the book and handing it back to the waiter.

"Cat-like is actually the perfect adjective to describe you."

Ali batted her eyelashes. "Well thank you."

"I'm serious. Long, lean, not to mention stamina that can only be linked to having nine lives."

She grinned as Ali's cheeks turned pink. "Well I'll be glad to have nine lives tonight."

"And why's that?"

"Because that thing you do with your tongue... it takes me straight to heaven." It was Ashlyn's turn to blush, and Ali chuckled as the waiter brought her card back. "Alright babe, let's head out."

X

When they arrived at the nightclub, they decided to head to the bar first and get a drink. They were discussing an order that Ali had just gotten at the bakery when the bartender slid another whiskey in front of Ashlyn. 

"Oh I didn't order this."

"It's from the lady at the other end of the bar."

They both craned around to look in the direction he pointed. A tall redhead in a green top lifted her martini in Ash's direction, throwing her a wink.

"Oh! Wow..." Ashlyn laughed nervously, unsure of what to do.

"That was... nice of her."

"Yeah."

"Are you going to send one back?"

She looked at Ali, cocking one of her eyebrows. "Excuse me?"

"That's the polite thing to do, I guess. Drink for a drink. She's pretty."

"Uh... do you want to send her a drink?"

Ali gave a hollow laugh. "Yeah, I don't think I'm her type."

Ashlyn rolled her eyes. "I'm not sending something back. But I am drinking what she sent. It would be rude not to." She drained her first drink, then took a sip of the new one. "Oh wow. That's amazing, actually. Super smooth. She know's her whiskey. Do you want to try?"

Ali took another sip of her vodka soda. "I'm fine." She recrossed her legs and ran her hand along the bar. "I mean... if you wanted to send her a drink, you can. I won't be like, mad."

"What are you talking about?"

She gestured with her head, still not quite meeting Ashlyn's eyes. "The redhead. We're not... technically exclusive. I understand if you wanted to reciprocate."

Heat began to spread throughout Ashlyn's body, and not the kind she was accustomed to feeling when she was with Ali. "What are you saying?"

"Nothing! I just... I mean, you haven't asked me to be your girlfriend, you're still on the market."

Ashlyn stared at her for a second, suddenly unsure of where this evening was heading. "Fine." She caught the bartender's attention. "Can you send another martini to the beautiful redhead at the other end?" She in no way needed to throw in the word beautiful, he knew who she was talking about, but she couldn't stop the rising irritation at the way Ali was acting. She glanced back at her date just in time to see her face pull into a deep frown. For a moment, she was flooded with shame, but then something stiffened her spine. She's the one who told you to send her a drink. She's the one saying you're not exclusive.

"Ready to dance?"

She looked back over at Ali, finding her smile back in place, and fought to push the entire thing from her mind.

"Let's dance."

 Once on the dance floor, time seemed to suspend. Their bodies pressed against each other, flowing with the music and getting lost in feel of being so close. Ali was normally wary of any type of public affection, worried that the wrong person would see, but it was her hands that came to find Ashlyn's waist, pulling her until they were chest to chest. Ashlyn couldn't take her eyes off of Ali, the phrase cat-like once again making it's way to the forefront of her mind as Ali spun in her arms and pressed her back against Ashlyn's chest, her ass grinding against her until Ashlyn thought she might pass out.

She licked her suddenly dry lips. "Are you thirsty?" Ali tipped her head back to smirk at her. "I meant do you want to step over to the bar," she chuckled.

"I could use another drink, yeah."

Ashlyn took her hand and led her off of the dance floor. She ordered them another round of drinks, throwing in two shots of Jameson on a whim. She brought them over to Ali, who raised an eyebrow. "So It's a shots kinda night?”

She gave her an innocent look. "Unless of course, you don't think you can handle it."

Ali gave her a heated look for a moment, before bumping her shot glass against Ashlyn's and quickly tipping it down her throat. Ashlyn did the same then took the shot glasses back, pressing a kiss to Ali's cheek. She fought her way through the crowd to place them back on the bar.

When she got back to Ali, she found her standing next to a dude in a red T shirt. 

"Oh hey."

"Ash, this is Jason," Ali explained. "He came over to compliment my outfit."

"Among other things," he winked.

Ali raised her eyebrows at Ash before turning back to him. "Well, thank you, but we're headed back to the dance floor."

"Unless you want to do this dance with Jason." She didn't know what in the world possessed her to say it. Ali's head jerked around to look at her. 

"Excuse me?"

"I mean... seeing as we're not mutually exclusive."

Ali's earlier phrasing hung in the air between the two. "Really? You wouldn't have a problem with that?"

Ashlyn feigned nonchalance. "Nah. It's a free country. You can do whatever you want."

"You sure? That wouldn't make you jealous?"

Ashlyn shook her head, the obvious lie making her skin itch.

The older woman tossed her hair over her shoulder with a dry laugh. "Y'know what? Why not? Jason, would you like to dance?"

Jason, who seemed equally confused and elated about how this had turned out, nodded eagerly and took Ali's hand, leading her back towards the mass of moving bodies. Ashlyn watched as he turned her around and pulled her to lean against him. She held eye contact with Ali as one of his hands pressed to her stomach, helping establish a rhythm.

This is fucking bullshit, she silently seethed. She hadn't been looking forward to this all week so that she could watch some guy paw at Ali. Then maybe you shouldn't suggested it, you idiot. She tried to busy herself with knocking back her whiskey, but she couldn't tear her eyes away from Ali.

Her tiger brown eyes seemed to shine in the weird, hazy lighting of the nightclub. Her body was moving, but it was obvious to anyone paying attention that her mind was on Ashlyn, not the guy behind her. A challenge seemed to be written across Ali's features, as if daring Ashlyn to admit how much she hated this.

For her part, Ash took several slow, calming breaths, telling herself that she could do this, that it was fine. Ali was a grown up, she could dance with whoever she wanted to.

That is until Jason's hands slid to Ali's hips, gripping them, pulling her back against him the way Ashlyn loved to do. She was walking away from the small table she had been stationed at before she even realized what was happening. Thankfully, the song ended a few moments later and Ali extracted herself from his grip.

She sauntered towards her, stopping when their faces were just a few inches apart. "Everything alright?"

The jealousy roaring through her bloodstream was still screaming for her to get in that guy's face, but she pushed it away. "How would you feel about heading back to my place?"

"Already?"

Ash leaned forward until her lips met Ali's ear. "I think I'd like to take a crack at one of those nine lives." She felt Ali shiver against her.

"Lead the way." 

Chapter Text

The incessant ringing of her phone cut through the darkness, dragging Ali from a deep sleep. She grappled around before finding it, blindly tapping and pressing buttons without opening her eyes until it went silent. She let out a sigh and burrowed deeper beneath the blankets, her fingers rubbing at the arm thrown over her side as she fell back asleep.

Or tried to anyway. Instead, her phone began to ring again. She let out an irritated groan and grabbed it, squinting at the screen to see who in their right mind was calling her when she was trying to sleep.

Alex Morgan.

She hit accept and brought the phone clumsily to her face.

“’Lo?” she ground out.

“Are you okay?” Alex’s voice was thin and high with tension.

“Why wouldn’t… Yeah? I’m sleeping…” Behind her Ashlyn began to stir a bit, her lips finding the patch of skin just behind Ali’s ear, making her give a contented sigh.

“Ali it’s 5:50.”

She immediately sat up, panic flooding her system. “Oh my god. Oh shit, I… Oh my god Alex, I’ll be right there, my alarm, I must have not- Fuck!”

“Calm down! It’s, it’s fine, I was just really worried. I’ve got things started here but we do have that baptism order today-“

“I’m on my way! I’m so sorry, I’ll be there in like 10, I’m, ugh. See you in a second.”

She hung up and her phone screen lit up with the eight texts and missed calls she’d received from Alex before waking up. She scrambled out of the bed, spinning in a complete circle as she tried to find her clothes from last night.

“Everything okay?” Ashlyn rasped from the bed, propping herself up on one elbow as she yawned.

“I’m late, so, so fucking late, I should have been at the bakery an hour ago.” She found her underwear halfway underneath Ashlyn’s dresser and pulled them on even though they really weren’t in any condition to be worn again. “Alex just- where the fuck are my jeans?!”

“Check the hallway. And your shirt is… probably by the front door.”

Ali quickly threw the clothes on, shoving her feet into her strappy heels and praying that her gym bag was in her car so that she could change into sneakers. “I have to go.”

“Take the jacket by the front door, it’s cold.”

She went back to the bed and pressed a quick kiss to Ashlyn’s cheek. “Go back to sleep.”

“Have a good day,” she murmured as Ali practically ran from the room.

X

“I am SO sorry.” She rushed through the back door, heels thankfully replaced by tennis shoes. “I don’t know how I managed to forget to set my alarm.” This was a lie of course; she hadn’t set an alarm because she had been decidedly preoccupied when she got back to Ashlyn’s. What had started as hands wandering dangerously during the car ride had quickly become frenzied kissing as soon as Ashlyn had managed to get her front door open. They had gone round for round, not stopping until they had passed out from pure exhaustion in the early hours of the morning.

“It’s okay! Like I said, I was mainly just worried. You’re never late, and then you weren’t answering my texts and- OH MY GOD!”

Ali whipped her head around to look at Alex as she hung Ashlyn’s jacket up on the rack. “What?!”

“You… naughty girl!” Alex squealed.

“What are you talking about?”

Alex’s hands came to grip her shoulders, turning her to face her. She gripped Ali’s chin in on of her hands and tilted her head, peering at something on Ali’s neck. “I’m talking about these KILLLER hickeys!”

Panic settled low in her stomach and she jerked out of her best friend’s grip, ducking so that she could look at her reflection in the door of the oven. Sure enough, several red and purple marks decorated the base of her throat and her collarbones, not hid at all by the scooped neck of her top. Her cheeks burned as she stared at them. She remembered Ashlyn giving them to her; the consequences of her biting kisses hadn’t entered her mind in the moment, instead she had nearly come in her pants as the other woman had growled something about ‘Mine’.

“Oh my god.”

“Oh my god!”

“It’s not… what it, what it looks like,” she stammered.

“Oh, so you’re saying you weren’t late for work today because you were too busy having dirty sex last night to set an alarm?” Alex’s voice was teasing, full of glee, but the words hit Ali like a punch to the stomach. Because Alex was right. This thing with Ashlyn was affecting the other parts of her life, whether she wanted it to or not. What if someone else saw these? What if someone had seen them last night in the nightclub? You have a job to do, a business to run, people depend on you and you fucked up because you were too preoccupied with fucking a hot girl.

“Just drop it!” she snapped.

Alex took a step back in shock. “Al… I was just kidding.”

“Well I’m not! We… we have work to do. We don’t have time to talk about this.” She grabbed her chef coat from the closet and shrugged it on, feeling grateful for its high neck as she buttoned it into place.

“Ali you don’t have to be so uptight about it,” Alex tried again, her tone very hurt. “You’re a grown woman, you’re allowed to have sex with whoever you want. And if… you don’t want to tell me about it… you don’t… don’t have to…”

Ali squeezed her eyes shut as she heard the tears becoming apparent in Alex’s voice. She had become more sensitive as her pregnancy progressed, and it wasn’t uncommon for her to cry over things like a picture of a cute dog. But Ali knew that this wasn’t Alex crying over nothing; she was being a jerk. She turned and extended her arms, pulling Alex into a gentle hug.

“Alex, come here. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to snap… it’s complicated. It’s not that I don’t want to tell you… it’s just so complicated, okay? I don’t know how to talk about it yet, so I just… can we just let it go for now?”

Alex sniffled into her shoulder. “It’s not like I would judge you. I had my share of wild nights before I met Serv!”

Ali couldn’t help but smile as she pulled back to look at her. “It’s not… I know you won’t. I just don’t want to talk about, alright? It’s not you, I promise.”

“But… you know I’m here for you, right? You’re my best friend, you can talk to me about anything.”

Ali gave a long sigh. If only she could truly believe that. “I know. And… eventually. Just not right now.”

“Okay.”

“Now, what needs to be done? Where can I start?”

“I’ve got most of the cookies begun if you want to start on the cake for the baptism.”

“Okay, I can do that.” She grabbed the order form and tried to ignore the queasy feeling in her stomach, the sinking feeling that everything around her was collapsing and she would be crushed beneath the debris.

X

It had been a few days, and the hickeys on Ali’s neck had started to fade but her intense embarrassment about the entire ordeal had not. She’s been avoiding any subject of conversation that could possibly lead Alex to ask more questions, instead burying her head in their workload, testing new recipes for the upcoming holiday season.

She had also been avoiding Ashlyn. Several times she had reached out to make plans, but Ali had put it off, claiming that they had several large events coming up and that she needed to focus on work this week.

Lies.

She was terrified.

But more than that, she felt intensely guilty.

What was she doing? She had been so preoccupied with what she was feeling, what she wanted, that she had never stopped to consider how her actions affected everyone else. If someone found out she was dating a woman, it could lead to Meemaw taking away the bakery but what about further than that? It could taint the bakery’s reputation. What if it ended up going out of business? Over 50 years of her family’s hard work would be gone. Alex would lose her job, right before giving birth to her first child. What about the front of house girls? She knew that Christen used her paycheck to help her dad who was still adjusting to raising her sisters on one salary. And the high school girls might have not been paying rent yet but they were saving for cars and college and independence, and Ali’s selfishness could rip that all away.

Ali’s phone buzzed where it sat on the treadmill and she picked glanced at it. It was a Facebook message from her mom. She opened it, quickly reading.

Deborah Krieger has formed a chat.

Deborah krieger has added Ali Krieger and Tyler McAllister.

Deborah Krieger: I saw that you two weren’t friends on the Facebook. Thought I would help out!!! 🤣🤣😘

Deborah Krieger has left the chat.

Ali nearly tripped over her own feet as she realized exactly what her mom had pulled. She hurriedly slowed the treadmill’s pace down, taking a screenshot and sending it to her brother.

‘Wtf!!! Also since when does Mom know how to work fb messenger??’

She only had to wait a few moments for his reply.

‘Oh Jesus’

‘Good ole Deb, trying to get you laid’

She rolled her eyes.

‘Seriously what was she thinking?’

She took a drink of water while waiting for his response.

‘Probably that your biological clock is ticking and she wants grand babies’

She received a Facebook messenger notification and opened it.

Tyler McAllister: Well I guess it’s like they say: If you want something done right, ask a Southern woman

Ali snorted.

Ali Krieger: I’m so sorry, Tyler. She’s incorrigible.

Tyler McAllister: Don’t be sorry! My mom probably would have done the same if she knew how to send a message using ‘the facebook’ haha’

Ali Krieger: Still, hope she didn’t interrupt anything too important lol

She placed her phone back on the treadmill and reached out to up the pace, but got another message before she could.

Tyler McAllister: In all honesty she did me a favor haha. I’ve been trying to figure out how to get in contact with you without coming across like a total creep.

Tyler McAllister: but now that Deb broke the ice

Tyler McAllister: could I take you out for dinner?

Tyler McAllister: maybe this Friday night?

She stared down at her phone in shock. He was seriously asking her out? She had assumed he was just being polite.

Her gut reaction was to say no. She was already seeing someone. What happened to you guys not being exclusive? The memory of her petty, insecure behavior at the bar made her stomach ache. She was such a wreck, what did Ashlyn even see in her?

She pulled herself back to the matter at hand. What was she going to say?

You should go out with him. It’s not as if she didn’t find him attractive.

But do you find him more attractive than Ashlyn? To be completely fair there weren’t many people she found as attractive as Ashlyn.

Maybe this is for the best. She squeezed her eyes shut but couldn’t stop her thoughts. You’re attracted to men. You always have been. Up until this point you assumed you would probably end up with one. What if you end up really liking him? He’d be happy, his parents would be happy, your mom would be overjoyed...

But would Ali be happy? Was she happy now?

Her head was starting to ache as her thoughts spun round and round.

What about Ashlyn?

Maybe she’s better off without you. With as warm and wonderful as she was, it would surely only be a matter of time before she found someone else, a woman who was secure in herself, who wasn’t stuck hiding from her family’s expectations.

She picked up her phone.

Ali Krieger: Sure. Is 6:30 okay?

Tyler McAllister: it’s a date 🙂

X

They were halfway through their entrees and Ali was already wishing this date was over.

It’s not that Tyler wasn’t nice. He was. He had greeted her at the door to the restaurant with a hug that wasn’t overly familiar, complimenting her and holding the door open for her. He’d been sweet and attentive, asking her questions about running the bakery and her time at Penn State. He’d even laughed when she told a dumb story about her and Kyle getting hopelessly lost on a trip to Los Angeles when they lived together. He’d been great.

But something was missing.

When his hand brushed hers, her skin didn’t break out in goosebumps. She didn’t find herself desperately hoping he would tell more stories about himself so that she could understand him better. In fact, the more he talked about his job, the more she had to fight herself not to glance at her watch.

She imagined a future 5, 10 years down the line, where they were married, maybe with a few kids. She imagined having to go to dinner with his work friends, listening as they discussed interest rates, getting in heated conversations about their fantasy football teams. She would end up talking to their wives who would wink and roll their eyes at ‘the boys’.

She had to get out of here.

When the waiter came by and asked if they wanted dessert, he deferred to her.

“No, I’m okay. I think we’re ready for the check, thank you.”

“Are you sure? You don’t want another glass of wine?”

She did, but she wanted it in the comfort of her own home, preferably on the phone with her brother.

“No, I’m okay. I better head out, it’ll be an early morning tomorrow.” She nodded at the waiter and he went to get their check.

When he placed it on the table, Tyler went to grab it, but she held up a hand.

“Can we split it?”

“I really don’t mind! How about I get this one, and you get the next one?”

She opened her mouth to reply but stopped, unsure of what to say. He studied her for a second before glancing down at the table bashfully. “There won’t be a next one, will there?”

She let out a sigh. “I’m sorry, Tyler. It’s not you, it’s just-“ You just don’t measure up to the person I’ve been comparing you to all evening. It’s not fair, but I can’t help it.

He gave a soft smile. “Don’t apologize, Ali. If it’s not there, then it’s not there. And better to find out now than in six months, right?”

She chuckled slightly. “For sure.”

“Yeah, we can split it.”

They both put down their cards and the waiter picked up the check. Neither one really knew what to say, instead sitting in silence while they waited. Once they had signed their receipts, they made their way out of the restaurant.

“Do you want me to walk you to your car? I don’t mind.”

She smiled at him. “It’s okay, I’m just down the row. But have a good night, Tyler.”

He gave a half wave, returning her smile, albeit a bit forced. “You too, Ali.”

Chapter Text

‘Hey, sorry I’ve been MIA. Can we meet up and talk?’

Ashlyn had been staring at the text message for a full fifteen minutes. How was it possible that a mere ten words could evoke so much anxiety? On one hand, she was relieved that Ali had finally texted her; she had been confused and frankly a little hurt when all of her efforts to make plans had been shot down. But on the other hand, she had the sneaking feeling that Ali’s absence had less to do with her workload at the bakery than she was admitting.

There was only one way to find out.

‘Hey! No worries. Yeah, what did you have in mind?’

‘I thought if the shop could spare you for the night then you could come over and I’ll cook us dinner’

‘Let me talk to KO’

She glanced over at her coworker, who was watching an old episode of Brooklyn Nine Nine on her phone. She cleared her throat. “Hey... I know that I cut out early last Saturday and that really if anything you should have the night off tonight but-“

“But Baker Girl finally reached out and you need to leave early again?”

Ashlyn have a shaky chuckle. “That transparent, huh?”

Kelley sighed, placing her phone down. “It’s not a problem, I can cover the shop.”

“Are you sure?”

She gestured around to the nonexistent customers. “I think I can handle it.” An uncharacteristically angry look crossed her face. “But I’m not gonna lie, I don’t know if it’s a good idea.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean... this whole push and pull between the two of you! You two are great and you introduce her to all of us, then I have to pick you up from a bar because you had a fight and you don’t know if you wanna see her ever again. Then you’re back on, but then have a weird albeit super hot night out, only for her to ghost you for a week? That’s not cool, Ash, and you deserve better.”

“It’s not... it’s not as simple as it sounds, Kel.”

“Oh, nothing about it sounds simple. The entire thing sounds like a clusterfuck. What is she possibly going to say to make her behavior so far okay?”

“It’s... I really like her, Kelley. And so yeah, things have gotten a little messed up, but I think if we can get through this it could be great.”

“But will you ever get through this part? Or is she just gonna keep stringing you along like a lovesick puppy?”

“Fuck off, KO.”

She rubbed at her eyes for a second before turning to face her head on. “Ash, you know I’m not just being a bitch. I care about you dude, and I can’t act like this whole thing doesn’t have me worried for you.”

“I just...” Ashlyn let out a slow breath. “At the very least I need to hear her out. I need to know what’s going on, where we’re going.”

“Then go. I’ll cover tonight, but Ali needs to give you some answers. It’s the very least you deserve.”

“Okay. I promise, we’ll really talk it out.”

“Alright. And if you are still a thing after tonight then I want more of those cookies,” Kelley demanded.

Ash gave her a half smile. “Deal.”

X

No matter what she promised Kelley, Ashlyn couldn’t bring herself to demand answers of Ali as soon as she walked through her apartment door.

Her hair was down and wavy, and she met Ashlyn with a sweet kiss on the mouth, one that had Ashlyn struggling to remember what they even needed to discuss.

Amazing smells were issuing from the kitchen, and she settled herself at the small table and watched Ali finish up dinner.

“Do you want anything to drink?”

“Whatever you’re having is fine.”

Ali tossed a grin over her shoulder. “Really? You want a glass of Cabernet?”

Ashlyn shrugged. “You don’t know, maybe I’m a closeted wine fan.” She immediately grimaced a little at her choice of words, but Ali breezed past them.

“I figured this would be a little more your style.” She reached into one of the cabinets and pulled out a bottle of Maker’s Mark, handing it to Ashlyn for her inspection.

“You spoil me.”

Ali handed her a glass. “I’m trying.”

Dinner was on the quiet side, both of them seeming to be very much in their own heads. It wasn’t until both plates were cleared and both glasses filled that Ali took Ashlyn’s hand. “Wanna move to the couch?”

“Sure.”

Once they were settled, Ali took a deep breath and looked directly into Ashlyn’s eyes. “I know… that I kinda dropped off the map this week. I… a couple things happened, and I needed to figure out where my head was at.”

Ash nodded, her eyebrows furrowed. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah! Well… I think so. Yeah. So the morning that I woke up really late for work, I uh… Alex saw the hickeys on my neck.”

Ashlyn tried her best to swallow her groan. “Probably not my most well thought out move.”

Ali gave her a small smile. “I mean, I definitely wasn’t complaining at the time. But… it sent me into panic mode. About a lot of the things we’ve already talked about, my family, my grandmother taking the bakery back, but then I just spiraled, thinking about worst case scenarios where the bakery ended up going out of business because of my actions, and all of the people that would be hurt, that would lose their jobs because of me-“

“Hey.” Ashlyn grabbed her hand to stop her rambling. “That’s a truly worst-case scenario, that doesn’t happen anymore.”

“But it could. And I’ve always known that, I just… I panicked. I was scared, Ashlyn, and in turn I acted like a coward.”

“I feel like you’re being a little hard on yourself. Yeah, it wasn’t fun not getting to talk to you all week, but there’s not really any harm done.”

Ali chewed on the inside of her cheek for a second. “There’s something else.”

“O… kay?”

“But… just give me a chance to fully explain, okay? And however you’re feeling when I’m done… we’ll go from there.”

Ashlyn’s stomach lurched with nerves. “Alright.”

“In the midst of all of this panic, I got asked out on a date. Someone that I had met once before. And I was so far into my spiral that I tried to tell myself that maybe it would be better off this way. If I could find the guy everyone had always expected me to, if you could find a girl who wasn’t so terrified of being out and proud like you, maybe we would be better off.”

Ashlyn felt like the oxygen was being squeezed from her lungs. She pulled her hand from Ali’s grip. “So what? This is you telling me you’ve decided to ignore your feelings so that your family won’t be uncomfortable? That you would rather hurt me, hurt and punish yourself? Because this isn’t fair, Ali. It’s, it’s bullshit!

“Just listen to me!”

“What?”

“I… I went on the date.”

“Shit.” Ashlyn came to standing, walking a few steps. Part of her was waiting for the anger that always seemed to be just around the corner, the classic Harris fury that had gotten her into trouble time and again, but it didn’t come. Instead, hurt spread through her chest, slipping through her ribs and poisoning her bloodstream until she could barely breathe. She forced herself to turn around. “And? Did you have a great time getting to be exactly what society expects you to be? Did you get to talk about straight conversation topics and then have lots of straight sex?” she spat.

Ali came to her feet. “Stop it.”

“Well? What’s the answer? Why did you even invite me over here?”

“It was one of the worst dates I’ve ever been on.”

Ashlyn stared at her for a second then turned to stare out the window as she let out a low laugh. “Great. That’s great, Ali. So I’ll just sit around, waiting for the next guy, the one who doesn’t suck, who can whisk you away. Perfect. Sounds like a great plan.”

“Will you shut up? The date was awful because he wasn’t you!”

She froze. She slowly turned to look at Ali. “…what the hell are you talking about?”

She slowly walked closer. “He… he was nice enough. He did the right things, asked the right questions. But it didn’t matter because every moment I was with him I was comparing him to you. I was waiting for his touch to set my skin on fire, waiting for, for the look in his eye to make me feel like I was flying, but it never came. And it doesn’t… it has nothing to do with the fact that he’s a man and you’re a woman. It has everything to do with the fact that you are you, and I’m quickly realizing that no one can measure up to that.”

She was just mere inches away now. Ashlyn sniffed, trying to keep her tears at bay. “Don’t… don’t say something you don’t mean. Don’t try to save my feelings. I would rather you hurt me now than wait.”

Ali’s hands came to cup Ashlyn’s face, pulling her so that their foreheads were touching. “I want to be with you. Not with the guy my mom set me up with, not the guy I danced with at the nightclub, not any other man and not any other woman. You.”

“Ali…” Her voice cracked, making it clear to both of them just how hard she was working to hold it together.

“You make me feel strong. You make me feel bold, and brave, and proud. You… when we’re together it feels like there’s nothing I can’t do. And… I don’t want to date anyone else. I want you to be my girlfriend.”

“What about your family? Your friends?”

She watched as Ali swallowed hard. “It’s going to be hard. And I can’t tell you that I’m going to walk into my parents’ house tomorrow and tell them I’m bisexual. I just… I can’t. But I’m going to start making the journey forward. I’m… I’m tired. Tired of not living my life to the fullest because of what other people want. And it might take me a second, but… I would love to see a future where I’m out and proud. And I would love it if you were holding my hand when that happened.”

Before she knows what she’s doing, her lips are on Ali’s. She wraps her arms around her, pulling her as close as possible, their tears mixing on their cheeks. After several moments Ali pulled back.

“Is that… is that a yes? Will you be my girlfriend?”

Ashlyn exhaled sharply, her body trembling with the thousand emotions she was battling. “You mean it? A future where neither of us has to hide who we are?”

Ali nodded. “That’s what I want.”

“How do I know that you’re for real? Because I want to trust you, I do, so badly, but I can’t… I can’t say yes unless I know.”

Ali glanced down for a second, her lower lip caught between her teeth. But when she looked back up at Ashlyn, her eyes held a fiery determination. She took her phone out of her back pocket, and quickly typed something out before turning her phone so that Ashlyn could see.

‘Hey Alex. I know that I was awful to you earlier in the week, and then was weird and distant. After work tomorrow, do you wanna go out and get coffee? I’d love to properly apologize and explain what’s going on.’

When Ashlyn glanced back up at her, she hit the send button, both of them watching as the message was delivered.

“I’ll tell Alex tomorrow. Because… you’re right. She deserves to know. And if she’s the friend I think she is, she will love me even more it. And that’s a step I want to take even… even if you don’t want to be my girlfriend.” Her voice started to fade a bit at the end, and Ashlyn grabbed her hand.

“Ali, nothing in this world would make me happier than to be your girlfriend.”

Chapter Text

"It's honestly been way too long since we did something together other than baking," Alex said as she settled onto the couch. 

Ali glanced around with a small smile. Castle Coffee was a cute little coffee shop she had fallen in love with from the first time she visited. The front had plenty of tables for people to set up their laptops and get work done, but the back room was cozier, with couches and armchairs, everything lit with mismatched lamps and strings of Christmas lights. "I know."

"I've missed this." She looked back at Alex. "Remember back in San Fran, all of the movie nights and brunch dates?"

"Anything to keep us sane with everything happening at school."

"Now we're real adults," Alex rolled her eyes. "I'm married, getting fatter by the minute..."

"Hey, don't say that!"

"I'm just kidding. I mean, my body is definitely starting to look weird, especially when I'm naked, but I'm not upset. I'm excited to meet the little one." She rubbed a hand over her stomach and took a sip of her hot chocolate.

"Me too." Ali looked down at her lap, unsure of how to steer this conversation in the direction she wanted.

"Hey." She looked up at Alex. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah... I just wanted to talk to you about something."

"Does it involve how you ended up with those hickeys?" she teased.

"Actually... yes." She took a deep breath. "So you remember all those weeks ago, when I locked my keys in my car, and my date came and picked me up?"

"Yes..." she said, her smile growing.

"Same person."

"Ooh!" Alex did a happy little dance in her chair. "Tell me everything! Wait, what's his name, you have to let me facebook stalk him."

She placed her latte on the coffee table in front of them, reaching for Alex's hands. "I... I need to tell you something."

"You're kind of scaring me..."

"It's, no everything is-" She sucked in a deep breath as she became more and more flustered. Finally she forced herself to peer into Alex's concerned eyes. 

"It's a woman. The person I've been seeing... is a woman."

She watched as Alex's look of worry was replaced by surprise, then was quickly pulled into a bone crushing hug. "Ali."

"I know... that I should have told you a long time ago, but I didn't know how to bring it up, and I was worried..."

Alex pulled back, her own eyes getting teary as Ali wiped at her cheeks. "Worried about what?"

"About... I don't know. For the most part I was sure you wouldn't care, but, but you've heard about everything Kyle went through, and I just-" she shook her head.

"Well, you're wrong. I do care." Ali jerked her head up to look at her. "I care that you're happy. I care about whether the person you're with realizes what an amazing person you are. And if that's a woman? Great."

Ali gave her a watery smile, scrunching up her nose as happy, relieved tears threatened to wash over her. "I'm... oh God. I'm so glad you're my best friend."

"So tell me about this mystery woman."

She swallowed, trying to pull herself together. "Um... her name is Ashlyn. We met when she came in with her friend to book us for a wedding. She works at a tattoo parlor, and she is... amazing, Alex. Seriously, she's the best. I uh... I asked her to be my girlfriend yesterday."

Alex gave a small squeal, earning a dirty look from some of the other patrons of the coffee shop, but Ali could only giggle as she was pulled back in for another tight hug. "I need to see pictures. Multiple."

Ali pulled up Ashlyn's instagram on her phone and handed it over to Alex, who immediately began to scroll through her pics. "What a BABE! Oh she's beautiful, Al. She's seriously stunning. And those taTTOOS!"

"I know," Ali grinned. "She's... ugh. Absolutely gorgeous while somehow managing to be sweet and kind and humble-"

"And incredible in bed-"

"Alex!" Ali swatted at her shoulder.

"What? Are you saying she isn't?" Ali's face flushed as she tried to find the right words to say. Alex gave her an all knowing grin. "Yeah, that's what I thought. So when do I get to meet the sex goddess?"

"Oh my god. I don't know, but you can't call her that when you do."

"I'm making no promises." She took hold of Ali's hand. "But back to more serious matters. Thank you for telling me. I can tell that it took a lot for you to trust me with this, and I'm so glad you did. I'm proud of you."

Ali ducked her head. "I'm... I'm proud of me too."

"Who else knows?"

She shook her head slightly. "No one, really. Kyle, Ashlyn, some of her friends, and now you. I haven't... my parents don't know. I know I'll have to tell them eventually, but..."

"One step at a time."

Ali nodded, a weight she hadn't been quite aware she was carrying lifting off of her shoulders. "One step at a time."

X

When she stepped through the doors of The Gentlemen's Driving Club, she was happy to see it bustling for once. "We'll be right with you, darlin'," an older man with a long grey ponytail called as he finished paying someone out. She could see both Ash and Kelley at their respective stations, heads bent over as they concentrated on their work. She waited patiently until the man beckoned her forward.

"How can I help you today, sweetheart?"

"I'm actually here to see Ashlyn, but if she's busy I can come back later."

He gave her an appraising look. "You wouldn't happen to go by Baker Girl, would you?"

She chuckled. "Some of have been known to call me that, yes."

He held out a hand. "My name is Earl, I own the shop. Forgive me, but I don't know that I've heard your real name."

She shook his hand with a smile. "Ali. It's nice to meet you."

"Earl, you better get your hands off my woman!" Ashlyn's voice carried over from her station, and Earl laughed.

"Yeah, yeah, Romeo, you can fight me for her hand in the parking lot."

Ash glanced up with a shit eating grin. "Don't think I won't, old man."

He gestured Ali towards the waiting area. "Miss Ali can I grab you something to drink?"

"No, I'm fine, really."

"Suit yourself." He grabbed an old beat up leather jacket from beside the door and pulled it on as he turned to address Ashlyn and Kelley. "I'm headed out ladies. Have yourselves a good night." He looked back at Ali, throwing her a wink. "Very nice to meet you." 

"You as well."

Ali settled into her chair, her attention drifting between the TV on the wall and her girlfriend's progress. The buzz of the guns droned on, and before she knew it her eyes had drifted shut.

"Boo!" She startled upright, finding Kelley in front of her, small grin in place. "Excuse me ma'am, this is a no loitering zone."

"Oh really?" Ali grabbed the tote bag she had placed on the chair next to her. "Even if I come bearing these?" She pulled out a box of cookies and handed them over. Kelley's eyes lit up as she took them.

"Ehhh... I guess I can let it slide this time."

"It's nice to see you guys busy."

Kelley nodded as she glanced around. "It is!" She dropped down into the seat next to her. "One of the other shops just got shut down by the health department, and it's made people think twice about where to go to get their ink done." She fished one of the cookies out and took a bite, dusting the crumbs from her face nonchalantly. "Which is great for our bottom line, but maybe not so great for Lover Girl over there. Won't be as many chances to sneak off and see you."

"I can hear you!" Ashlyn called. Kelley just laughed.

"I wasn't being quiet!"

"Anyways, I better clean up my station." She started to stand up then stopped. "I hear that you guys are official," she said, a bit quieter.

Ali nodded. "I'm... through hiding. Everything's not completely settled yet, but I'm headed in the right direction."

"That's good to hear." She glanced sideways at Ali. "Don't hurt her, okay?"

"I won't."

"I'm serious. She... she puts on a tough act, but she's got a big heart. I don't want it broken."

"Kelley..." Ali stopped to pick her words carefully. "The last thing I want is to hurt her. She... it's only been a few months, but she already means so much to me. I want to make her happy."

"Good." Kelley stood up and stretched. "And don't you ever show up without a box of cookies ever again!"

Ali smiled. "Roger that."

"Hey baby." Ashlyn sauntered over and gave her a kiss. "I didn't know you were coming."

"No worries, I should have called. Busy day?"

Ashlyn rubbed at her neck. "Busy and chaotic, but in a good way."

"I see. Well, do you have time for one more?"

Ashlyn glanced around, puzzled. "Did someone come in after Earl left?"

Ali gave her a soft grin. "Me, babe. I was talking about me."

Ashlyn's eyes snapped back to her in surprise. "Oh! You?"

"Me."

"You... you really want me to give you a new tattoo?"

"Well, unless you think I should go with Kelley."

Ash grabbed her hand and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. "Not a chance."

She led her to her station, settling her in the chair as she went about getting everything ready.

"Alright, Miss Krieger. What are we thinking? An infinity sign? A butterfly tramp stamp? Another massive quote in German?"

She smirked. "It's not massive."

"That's what she said!" Kelley yelled from her station, making them laugh.

"So what do you want?"

"I just want the word 'Liebe'."

"Ha! I was right, more German."

"I was thinking right here." She pulled up her sleeve, gesturing to the inside of her forearm, just beneath her elbow.

"Okay. What lettering?"

"Just a classic cursive script."

"And you're sure about this?" She looked up to see Ashlyn studying her.

"Yes. I've been wanting another one for a long time, and probably nine months ago, I began playing around with liebe which means love in German. And with... everything that's happening, I can't think of anything better to permanently mark on my body than a promise to live a life centered on love."

Ashlyn's warm hazel eyes flitted over her face, before she broke into a dimpled smile.

"Well I definitely can't argue with that."

Ali watched as her professional side took over, cleaning her skin thoroughly then sketching it out. She let her look at it when she was done. "Like this?"

"That's exactly what I want."

"Okay, I'm gonna start. This might hurt."

Ali laughed. "Worse than the script that's spanning my ribs? Probably not."

She chuckled. "Fair enough." She picked up the gun and began.

Ali was right, it didn't hurt.

When Ashlyn finished and sat back so that she could truly take it in, the tears gathering in her eyes had nothing to do with pain.

They had everything to do with love, both for the mark on her arm and the beautiful woman sitting in front of her.

Chapter Text

“Your lady friend is quite the looker.”

Ashlyn laughed and rolled her eyes. “My lady friend? Is that what we’re calling her now, Earl?”

He grinned. “Your girlfriend. Your paramour. Sweetheart. Valentine. Beloved. Darlin’. Flame. Sugar Pie. Better half-“

“Okay, okay.” She raised her hands in mock surrender. “Who knew you were such a romantic?”

“There’s a few things about me you don’t know yet,” he told her, rubbing at his beard.

“Oh yeah? Did you leave a string of broken hearts across Oklahoma? Is that why you had to run off to Virginia?”

“I had my days in the sun, but that’s of no business of yours,” he said, flicking the brim of her hat gently. “But as I was saying, she’s a pretty thing. Seems sweet and smart, too. You did good.”

Ash’s cheeks warmed at his praise. Earl had been more than just a boss to her. He had given her a job, yes, but he had also done his best to set her on a straight path, something she hadn’t always made easy. But even when she had majorly messed up, from getting a DUI in the aftermath of a particularly bad breakup to the time he’d had to come bail her and Kelley out of jail for getting caught up in a bar fight, he hadn’t turned his back on her. He'd been the father figure she'd been lacking. And in return she had gotten her head on straight and become an incredible tattoo artist and a model employee.

“That means a lot, Earl. Ali is every bit as great as she seems. I’m lucky to have found her.”

“You mean you’re lucky to have found each other,” he corrected. “You’re quite the catch yourself, Harris.”

“Thank you,” she said softly.

“What are your plans for the future?”

She blinked at him. “Well, I… I think it might be a tad early to be thinking about marriage. Not that, that I can’t imagine marrying Ali, or I mean someone like her, but I don’t want to jump the gun. The last thing I would want to do is freak her out. It’s only been a few months.”

He smirked and jammed his hands into his pockets. “I was asking about your future in general, but it’s nice to see that settling down isn’t completely off your radar.” Ashlyn’s cheeks went red. “Specifically, I was wanting to know what your career plans are.”

“I… I mean, I’m happy here, Earl. And I’d like to think that I do a good job for you.”

“You do a great job. Don’t be afraid to say so.”

“I don’t plan on leaving, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Alright.” He turned and stared out the front window, watching the cars drive up and down the streets.

“Is… something wrong? Did I get a complaint?”

“Hell no.” He turned to look at her. “Even if you did, I wouldn’t pay it any mind. No, I was just… I’ve just been thinking about things is all.”

She nodded slowly. “Okay.”

“Anyway, didn’t you request to leave early tonight? I can only assume you have better plans than listening to an old man ramble on.”

“I did, but Ali texted a little bit ago saying that she’s having to cover for one of her employees, so she can’t go out tonight. So if you wanna head out, feel free.”

“Just because she has to stay at work doesn’t mean you can’t be with her,” he said with a mischievous smile.

“What… a brilliant idea. I knew we kept you around for something other than being a Willie Nelson look alike.”

“Hey now, I don’t need that sass.”

She went and grabbed her jacket from the break room. “You’re the best, Earl. And I really mean that.”

“How ‘bout you tell me something I don’t know?”

X

“Welcome to- Hey! What are you doing here?” Ali was behind the counter, slicing apples with a long knife. She placed it to the side and took off her gloves, walking around the display case.

Ashlyn held up two coffee cups. “Figured I would bring the date to you.”

Ali smiled, her nose crinkling. “You’re adorable to offer, but I can’t have coffee, it’s 7:45. I’ll never get to sleep!”

“Aw man…” Ashlyn pouted for a second before grinning. “Good thing I brought you a chamomile tea, then.”

Ali’s eyes lit up. “You’re the best!” Ashlyn handed it to her and pressed a kiss to her cheek.

“How’s the evening going?”

She shrugged. “Slow. Honestly, evenings aren’t our busiest times, but it can be worth it if you get a bunch of kids after sports let out, or people getting stuff for the next day.”

 She leaned against the case, watching as Ali walked to the other side. “So remind me why you’re still here, even though you’ve been up since two am?”

Ali laughed. “I’ve only been up since four.”

Ash gave an exaggerated eye roll. “Oh my bad. You’ve only been up since the very reasonable hour of four am. And now it’s nearly eight and you’re still at work.”

She gave a half-hearted shrug. “Christen needed the night off, none of the other girls could cover.”

“Why did she need the night?”

“With her, I’ve learned it’s best not to ask questions.” Ashlyn chuckled. “No, in all seriousness, she’s been having a bit of a rough time. Her mom… she passed away recently. It was so sudden. One minute Christen is graduating from Stanford with a music degree, the world at her feet, less than a week later the entire family was gathering at the hospital. She came home to be with her dad and her younger sisters, it was just supposed to be for a few weeks. It’s been almost a year.” Ali sighed, pulling herself up to sit on the back counter, something Ashlyn had heard her complain about Christen doing several times. “I don’t know that she’s doing much to process her grief, other than looking for comfort in other people. And I don’t know how to tell her that there are better options without coming off as her stuffy old boss, you know?”

She came behind the cases. “She knows that you care for her.”

“I really do. And as much as I love having her on my staff, she’s young and has her whole life in front of her. She shouldn’t shelve her dreams.”

“She’ll get it figured out and come out stronger for it. But she’s lucky to have such an amazing boss behind her.” She rested her hands on Ali’s knees and gave her a soft kiss.

Ali snorted. “I don’t know that she always feels that way. Especially when I have to get on to her for being on her phone.”

Ashlyn shook her head mockingly. “Who knew that Ali Krieger was such a hard-ass?”

Ali laughed. “Pretty much everyone who has ever met me.” She hooked a finger into the collar of Ashlyn’s tee shirt, tugging her in for another kiss. It started off sweet, but quickly grew, Ashlyn’s hands sliding up her thighs to reach around and palm her ass.

The tinkling of the bell on the door broke them apart, Ashlyn taking several quick steps back. Ali slid from the counter, her hands smoothing her hair and the front of her blouse as she turned to face the customers who had just come in.

Three teenage boys stood just inside, all wearing matching grins. One let out a wolf whistle.

“Welcome to Patty Cakes.”

“Sorry, didn’t mean to bust up your party,” one laughed.

“We close in ten minutes, but if I can help you find anything let me know.” Ashlyn stepped back to the customer side of the cases, pretending to scroll through her phone as embarrassment made her whole body hot.

“Yeah, I want some of what she just got,” the tallest one called out, and Ashlyn watched as Ali flushed, her eyes darting towards her girlfriend.

“We… we have cookies on promotion. A dozen for only five dollars.”

He stepped closer, his eyes roaming over the cookies she pointed to. “Can I try one of the chocolate peanut butter?”

“You can buy one for fifty cents.”

“C’mon, I just want a little taste.”

Ashlyn was amazed that Ali was able to keep her customer service face and voice intact. “Fifty cents,” she repeated.

“Fine.” He pulled out a dollar. She picked up a cookie and placed it on a napkin on the counter. She reached out for his dollar and suddenly his hand wrapped around her forearm, tugging her closer. “How much do I have to pay for a taste of you?”

His buddies laughed but Ashlyn was beside him in a second. “Take your cookie and go.”

He released his hold on Ali’s arm and out of the corner of Ash’s eye she could see her cradling it to her chest. “Back off bitch, this isn’t about you.”

Ashlyn’s eyes narrowed. “Get the fuck out.”

“What’s wrong? Were you so busy out being an ugly dyke that no one ever taught you to share?”

She put a finger in the middle of his chest. “Why don’t you and your little friends go back to your mom’s basement and jerk each other off?”

He scoffed. “We’re not the faggots here.”

She gave him a hard shove, and he staggered back in surprise. As soon as he caught his bearings, his arm was coming around, his fist connecting with one of Ashlyn’s cheekbones with a sickening thud.

She heard Ali scream as she reeled to one side, pain exploding across her face. The other two boys were laughing, egging him on as he stepped closer to where she was trying to collect herself. He pulled at the front of his jeans. “What’s the matter, bitch? You wanna see how a real man does it?”

 “Touch her and I’ll fucking kill you.” Ashlyn looked over at the same moment he did to see Ali standing at the end of the counter with the long knife she had been using to cut fruit clutched in her fist. The warm brown eyes that Ashlyn loved to get lost in were ice cold, crackling with rage and fear.

“Woah, shit.” He stumbled backwards into his friends, all three raising their hands. Then one of them gathered their wits enough to grab the other two and pull them back towards the door. The bell rang out as the door was thrown open, all of them spilling out onto the sidewalk then into the parking lot.

“Oh my god,” She turned to find Ali white as a sheet. “I’m going to throw up.”

 She hurried forward and pulled the knife from her grip, placing it on the counter. “Are you okay?”

“Am I okay? Am I okay?” Her hands came up to cup Ashlyn’s face, turning her so she could inspect where she took the hit.

“I’m okay. Really, I’ve taken worse-”

She was cut off by a rock striking one of the windows, the glass plane shattering into a thousand glittering shards as it crashed to the floor.

Chapter Text

Everything was moving too quickly. Or maybe it was moving too slowly. All Ali knew is that she was too hot, she couldn’t breathe, and her life had just been smashed into pieces just like the window.

“Ali? Ali, breathe, it’s gonna be okay…” Ashlyn’s voice echoed around in her head.

“The window… I have to… god.” She began to retch, and Ashlyn dragged the trash can over but nothing came up but the little bit of tea she had drank.

“I’m… I’m going to call 911, okay?”

“No…” Ali moaned, still bent over the trash can.

“We have to. This is… the police are going to have to get involved, because you’ll have to report this to your insurance.”

“No. I’ll… I’ll pay out of pocket. I have savings.”

“Ali.” Ashlyn waited until she was able to pull herself upright. “We didn’t do anything wrong. But those little fucks can’t get away with this.”

She gave a jerky nod. “I just… okay.”

“I’m going to call.”

Ashlyn pulled out her phone and Ali walked numbly to the front of the shop. An entire pane of glass, one third of the entire front, now lay demolished, twinkling in the light. In the center was the rock, she recognized it as one of the ones bordering the flower gardens in front of the dental office.

She made herself walk to the register, grabbing her own phone. She stared at it blankly for a moment, then forced herself text her parents, telling them something had happened at the bakery and they needed to come immediately.

“Al?” She turned. “They said they’ll be here in probably about five minutes. Why don’t you come sit down?” Ali did as she said, her entire body heavy as if she were wading through sand. “Do you want some water?” She didn’t respond, so instead Ashlyn sat next to her. She didn’t even realize that her hands were balled into fists in her lap, until Ashlyn took them in her own.

“What are we gonna do?” she finally gasped out. She heard the whine of sirens coming closer.

Ashlyn didn’t answer.

When the police cars pulled in front of the bakery, the red and blue lights reflected off of the broken glass, throwing rainbows of light across the bakery. Two officers came to talk to them as their colleagues examined the vandalized window. Ali came to her feet as Ashlyn did, trying to force herself out of her fog.

“Who called?”

“I did. My name is Ashlyn Harris.” She extended her hand to shake theirs. “And this is Ali Krieger, she runs the bakery.” She nodded at them, not wanting to shake their hands.

“Officers Miller and Aronson. Care to take us through what happened?”

 Ali cleared her throat. “We… we were in here, waiting for close. It had been a slow night.”

“What time do you normally close?”

“Eight.”

“And do you work here?” he asked Ashlyn.

“No, no I just came by to see Ali.”

“We were… yeah, and three teenage boys came in. Probably high school, maybe early college. And they… they were being kinda gross, but I asked them what they wanted.”

“How were they being gross?”

Ali shrugged. “Just saying stuff,” she mumbled.

“They were hitting on her,” Ashlyn clarified.

“And one of them asked for a cookie. When I went to give it to him, he grabbed my arm and pulled me into the display case.”

“I told him to get his hands off her. We said some words back and forth. I pushed him and then he punched me.”

The older cop nodded. “So you made first contact.”

“No, he grabbed Ali first.”

“But as far as escalations go-“

“He grabbed her first. I tried to use words, and he wasn’t listening.”

The younger officer cut in. “So what happened after he hit you?”

“He uh…” Ashlyn’s voice trailed off, and Ali could see her leg starting to bounce under the table.

“He threatened her. Walked towards her. And I was scared, so I grabbed the knife off the counter and told them to get out or I would kill them.” After the words left her mouth, a dizzying wave of panic rolled through her body. Should she have admitted that to them? Would she be in trouble?”

“Okay, what happened next?”

“They left. We thought that would be the last of it, then…” Ali pointed at the shattered window. “Then Ashlyn called you guys.”

“And you have no idea who these boys are? They haven’t been in before?” Ali shook her head. “Do you have any idea why they would come in here and do this kind of damage? There was no instigating incident?”

The nausea was back, pulling at Ali’s stomach. “No,” she whispered. Next to her, Ashlyn shook her head tensely.

“Is that a security camera?” She looked up to see one of the other officers looking at her, gesturing to the camera in the corner of the shop. She jerked her head up and down as the dread slivered down her spine. She’d honestly forgotten they even had them, they so rarely needed to check the footage.

“Do you have a closed circuit monitor on premises?”

“In… in the back office.”

The younger officer, Aronson, stood and gave her a kind smile. “Could you take me back to look at it?” She shakily came to her feet, and Ash stood up to.

“Do you want me to come?”

Just then, an ambulance pulled into the parking lot. Ali shook her head. “No, I can… go get your face checked out. I’m okay.”

“I can come-“

“I’m okay,” she repeated. She walked to the back, unlocking the rarely used office and letting herself and the officer inside. As she sat in front of the computer, she swallowed hard.

“I… We didn’t do anything wrong,” she ground out.

“I didn’t say you did,” he assured her gently.

“It just…” she gazed hopelessly at the screen for a moment. “Here.” She backed the cameras up to the correct time and turned the screen so he could see better.

She didn’t want to watch the whole ordeal from an outside perspective, but she couldn’t tear her eyes away. She watched as she sat on the counter, Ashlyn coming closer, them kissing. Even without audio, she could tell the exact moment the guys came in. Her eyes began to fill with tears as he grabbed her. The officer didn’t say anything as it played out, and eventually she paused the footage.

“I hate how… weak I look. He grabbed me and I didn’t do anything. I just stood there with my mouth shut.”

He cleared his throat. “So Ashlyn is…”

“My girlfriend,” she whispered.

“No one has the right to come into your place of business and harass you. Your sexual orientation doesn’t change that.”

She opened her mouth to respond but ended up just nodding.

“Can I rewind the footage a bit?” She nodded again and he reached for the mouse. He backed it up to rewatch the punch. Ali flinched as the kid’s fist came into contact with Ashlyn’s face.

“What did he say here?” He stopped the video as the guy took a step forward, his hand moving towards his crotch.

“He… I don’t remember his exact words. Something about showing her how ‘a real man’ does it,” she spat.

“He was threatening to sexually assault her?”

She swallowed back a strangled sob, as she continued to process everything that had happened. “He… I guess. Yeah.”

“But you stepped in. Protected her.” She glanced up at him. “That doesn’t sound very weak to me.”

She gave a watery smile but couldn’t speak around the lump in her throat.

“I’m just going to pull this footage so that we have it.” He inserted a flash drive and went about copying it.

When Ali led him back to the front, her mom’s SUV was just pulling into the parking lot. It wasn’t even parked before her dad was coming out of the passenger side door, looking around wildly at the police cars and ambulance.

“Ali?”

“Dad.”

He turned and saw her, running towards her and throwing his arms around her before she would say anything else. “Alex are you hurt? Was the bakery robbed? What happened?”

“Ali!” Her mom came up and pulled her into a tight embrace.

“I’m fine, really I am. It… some kids came in, causing trouble, when they finally left, they threw a rock through the window.”

“Are you sure you’re not hurt? You’re shaking.” Deb turned and got the attention of one of the paramedics. “Excuse me, has she been checked over?”

“I’m really okay,” she insisted.

“I was on my way over anyway, you need to at least let me take a look at your arm. Your friend said one of them grabbed you?”

Deb gasped. “Friend? Oh my god was Alex here? Was it one of the high school girls?”

Ken jerked his head to look at Ali. “Grabbed you?”

“No, I was the only… only employee. Someone just happened to be visiting me. And, yeah one of them grabbed my arm, but I’m seriously fine.”

“I still need you to come with me.” Ali helplessly followed the paramedic to the ambulance, her parents in tow, but Ashlyn wasn’t inside. He sat her on the end and examined her arm before going through other routine checks. She kept trying to peer around him, unable to find Ashlyn.

“Your arm is fine-“

“I already told you that!”

“But I do think you’re in shock.”

“Of course she is, she was just attacked!” Deb argued.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a flash of short, dark hair. She turned to see Ashlyn getting into an SUV with Sue at the wheel. When she saw Ali looking over she quickly put a hand over her heart, then blew a kiss. Then Sue was pulling away and Ali tried to turn her focus back to what was happening around her.

The night was full of one headache after another: needing to alert her insurance company, calling her grandmother, having to figure out how to board up the window until a crew could come out and replace it. Thankfully her parents jumped at the chance to help settle things, letting her sit in silence, full of panic about what had happened, and fear of how it could have been even worse.

Chapter Text

"What the hell happened?"

Ashlyn kept her eyes focused out the window. "It... these three little punks came in. Things got... out of hand. They threw a rock through the window."

"What happened to your face?"

"I'm fine." 

"Bullshit," Sue countered.

"It's... I'm really fine."

"You can't even drive."

"Just... they said I'm in shock, and that I couldn't drive until tomorrow. Just take me home, I'll go back and get my car tomorrow-"

Sue cut off her rambling. "Not a fucking chance. I'm taking you back to our place."

"Sue, I just want to go to sleep-"

"You can sleep in our guest room."

Ashlyn sighed. When the paramedics had all but threatened to take her car keys, she'd been forced to call someone to come get her. Kelley was at the shop. Pinoe had been in a meeting, but when she got her text she immediately responded that Sue would come. And when a couple that she vaguely recognized from Ali's instagram came tearing onto the scene, she knew she had to get the fuck out of there. Because as much as she wanted Ali to be honest with her parents, she didn't want this to be her coming out story, her parents arriving on the scene to find out their daughter was a dyke and she and her girlfriend had been attacked.

She squeezed her eyes shut as she realized that stupid guy's words were echoing around in her head, poisoning her own thoughts.

"We're here."

She opened her eyes to find herself in Sue and Pinoe's driveway. She didn't remember most of the drive. She pushed open the door and followed Sue inside.

"Do you... want some water? Or maybe something to eat? I could make soup or something, if you want."

She gave Sue a half smile. "I don't have the flu."

Sue handed her a bottle of water from the fridge and they leaned against their opposite counters. "Shit dude. Whatever happened... you're gonna have one hell of a shiner."

Ashlyn brought a hand up, gently prodding at the tender skin with her fingertips. "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

The front door banged open, and PInoe came in. "Did you pick up- Shiiiiiiiiit," she gasped, staring at Ashlyn's face.

"Hi honey, I'm home," Ashlyn tried to joke, but there was no conviction behind it.

"I thought... from your text I thought you were in a car accident or something, what happened? Did you get in another bar fight?"

"No. I, I uh..." She couldn't figure out how to pull herself together.

"I'm... gonna go in the study. Maybe you guys could move to the living room." Sue gave Pinoe a kiss on the cheek then slipped down the hallway. Pinoe gestured with her head and Ashlyn followed her to the couch.

"Are you okay?"

Ashlyn nodded before burying her face in her hands. "It all happened so quickly." She gave a brief recount of everything that had gone down.

"Oh my god. That's... that's terrifying, dude. I'm so sorry."

"I just can't believe it got to that point. And it's not as if... I mean, I'm strong, Pinoe! You know I can hold my own, I just, I wasn't expecting... Yeah."

"Yeah."

"And after he hit me... he went to come at me again. Grabbing at his dick, promising to show me how a real man did it."

"Ash..."

"And all of a sudden I had this moment where I realized that it was two against three. That I might not be able to stop whatever he had on his mind. That I couldn't protect myself, I wouldn't be able to protect Ali..." Her face screwed up, and tears began to stream down her cheeks. 

"Hey, hey..." Pinoe shifted over to put an arm around her shoulders. 

 "And I feel like a chicken shit, because nothing happened! Taking one to the face? I've done it before, I'm sure it'll happen again, I shouldn't be this shaken. And I just keep thinking about what if, what if Ali hadn't thought to grab that knife? That little shopping center is practically deserted at night, no one would have come by to stop it, and they could have done whatever they wanted to me, or Ali, and I just-" her tears choked off her words and Pinoe rubbed her back.

"You're allowed to be upset. This never should have happened."

"I just want to hold Ali, to make sure that she's okay, but her parents were there. And I don't want her to have to look back and say that she was forced to come out to her parents after becoming the victim of a hate crime. She doesn't deserve that."

"You can call her tomorrow."

Ashlyn wiped miserably at her face. "I hate feeling afraid."

"I know, dude. I know."

X

She did call Ali the next day, feeling somewhat calmer after getting some sleep. She'd reached out to Ali, and they'd ended up cuddled together on Ali's couch, wrapped in blankets. The bakery was out of commission until the window could be fixed, and Ashlyn called out at the tattoo parlor, not wanting to leave Ali alone. They'd both tried to talk about it, but in the end settled on silence, breathing in each other's scents, taking comfort in the fact that for that moment, they were both safe.

A week and a half passed. The window was replaced. The bakery reopened. The police had no leads on who those little fuckers were.

Saturday afternoon found them at the Columbia Firehouse in Old Town, watching as Sue and Pinoe's bridal shower unfolded. The space was absolutely beautiful: exposed brick, dark wood paneling, cushy leather chairs. Their friends milled about, talking and laughing, everyone in awe of the cupcakes and cookies Ali had provided.

"You look really lovely, today," Ashlyn murmured in her ear. Because, oh, she did. Her hair was pulled back in a high ponytail, swishing around as she moved. And while she had been in a white chef's coat when getting the pastry display set up, she had taken it off to reveal a a silky dark green dress that showed off the defined muscles in arms.

"You're not so bad yourself, Harris," she whispered back with a smile. Ashlyn brushed a piece of imaginary lint off the shoulder of her black blazer.

"What can I say? I like to show off for my girl."

"You better be talking about me." Pinoe threw an arm around Ashlyn, earning a chuckle.

"Oh always. You're my number one."

"If I could get everyone's attention? And if Sue and Meg would be so kind as to come up here." Pinoe distangled herself from her friend and found her way to the front of the room, between her twin sister and her fiancee.

Rachel cleared her throat. "Since we're twins, I've known Megan longer than literally any other person on earth. She's my best friend, my confidant. I know all of her worst habits, from testing all of her pranks on me, to singing off key in the shower, to leaving her smelly shoes everywhere."

"Hey what kind of speech is this?!" Pinoe asked as the room laughed.

Rachel smiled. "But that being said, I also know all of the things that make her the amazing woman she is: she's funny, she'd hardworking, she's fiercely loyal. She's never been unafraid to stand up for the underdog, to make sure everyone gets a place at the table. For Meg, it's not about talking the talk, but walking the walk. She's a warrior. She always has been, and always will be."

"So any time she's introduced me to a significant other, I've been... what could maybe be described as critical," she laughed. "Like, you're really going to come in here and act like you're good enough for my twin sister? Okay bitch, let's see what you've got!" Ashlyn let out a barking laugh and Ali playfully shushed her.

"But then... Megan met Sue. And suddenly all of our phone calls were about how great she was, and smart, and pretty, and talented, and how Meg was pretty sure she could beat Sue in a race, but don't bring it up-"

"Yeah, great job on that one, Rach," Pinoe stage whispered as she received a little shove from Sue./

"And I figured it would be the same thing. Another girl who was way out of her league, who, to put it simply, wasn't good enough for Meg. And then Megan introduced us. And man... I couldn't have been more wrong." Rachel smiled at Sue who's cheeks were growing pink. "It turns out that when I'd assumed there was no one on earth who could go round for round with Meg, I was simply unaware that God had created Sue Bird. Because she is every bit as smart, kind, funny, compassionate, and fierce as Megan. She's a straight up ten, in every facet of her life, and I think everyone in this room is better off for knowing her."

Rachel looked down at the paper in her hands as her words earned a few soft ahs. "I used to not believe in fairytale love. I assumed it was something invented for Hallmark cards, or that it existed once upon a time but had, I don't know, been ruined by the post digitized age. But Meg, Sue, when I see the two of you together... I know that I was wrong. Love is real, and I know this, because the two of you live it every day."

"Where Meg is loud, Sue is a little more reserved. Where Sue has a plan, Megan is pretty much always flying by the seat of her pants. You're complimentary opposites. And while you are both such incredible women that I could never describe you as halves of a whole, because that would imply that you're somehow incomplete, I think I speak for everyone in this room when I say you're a perfectly matched set, and you're both better because you have the other."

"In a few months, you two are getting married, and part of me is sad, because that means my twin has a new teammate to take on the world with. But more than that, I am so, so unbelievably happy for both of you. I know that together you will both be unstoppable, and I can only hope I can someday find someone who compliments me as well as you two do. So everyone raise a glass to the happy couple, Sue and Megan; thank you for being the love story we all need, and here's to forever. Cheers."

"Cheers," everyone echoed, taking sips of their drinks as Pinoe pulled her sister into a bone crushing hug.

"That was so sweet," Ash murmured, but Ali didn't answer. She turned to find her dabbing at her eyes, fanning at her face in an attempt to stop any more tears. "Aw, sweetheart..."

"That speech was just so beautiful," Ali gasped out, and Ashlyn pulled her into her chest.

"It was. And every bit of it was true."

"I'm so glad Megan and Sue found each other.

Ashlyn looked down to reply, but found herself frozen at just how beautiful Ali looked with tears clinging to her eyelashes, her cheeks pink from emotion. "Would you... would you like to be my date to the wedding?"

Ali's eyes widened. "Are... you sure? It's just... I'll be in all of the pictures and stuff."

Ashlyn leaned her forehead against Ali's. "There's only one person I want by my side as I celebrate my best friend finding love. And that's you. I mean, if you want to come, that is." Her heart cramped in her chest as she considered that maybe Ali didn't, maybe that was too fast, maybe-

"I would love to come."

A small smile found it's way to Ashlyn's lips. "Really? Are you sure?"

Ali nodded. "I'm positive."

Chapter Text

“Ash, honey are you- OH MY GOD!” She had let herself in the front door, assuming Ashlyn was back in the bathroom, still getting ready. But when she rounded the corner, her girlfriend’s heavily made up face was thrust into hers, scaring the daylights out of her. “What the hell?” she cried, smacking Ashlyn in the arm as she clutched at her chest.

Ashlyn merely cackled. “Ha! Got ya! You should have seen your face,” she bragged smugly.

“What the hell are you supposed to be?!”

Ashlyn’s face fell a bit. “I’m the Joker.” She took a step back and spun slowly so Ali could take in her full costume. “See?”

As her heartrate returned to normal, Ali began to appreciate the lengths her girlfriend had gone to in order to complete the look, from the white face paint and green hair dye, to the perfectly disheveled suit. “It… it looks great, baby. But don’t scare me like that,” she laughed, giving her a playful shove.

“But you look so cute when you scream…” She tried to reach for her with a smile, but Ali backed away.

“No way. You are not kissing me while looking like that, you’re gonna give me nightmares.”

“Well you will be giving me very sweet dreams,” Ashlyn countered, reaching for Ali’s hand and spinning her around. She was wearing a tight black tee shirt tucked into black shorts, with leather pistol holsters around both arms and legs. She had even pulled her hair back into the signature French braid. “Eat your heart out, Lara Croft.”

“Are you sure I look okay?” Ali fidgeted with the costume. “I’m not really one to dress up for Halloween, I feel silly.”

“You look smokin’ hot,” Ash assured her, pressing a kiss to her hand. “Not silly at all.”

“Good,” Ali blushed. They had been invited to a house party by Ashlyn’s friend Julie, and she had agonized for days over what to wear. Although, if she had known Ashlyn was going to go the scary route, perhaps that would have made it easier. “You should have told me you were going to be the Joker, I could have been Catwoman.”

“The Joker and Catwoman aren’t allies, although… you do have the perfect legs to be Selina Kyle.” She leaned in again, but Ali just laughed.

“You can try and flirt all you want; you won’t be getting any of this until you’ve taken that makeup off.”

X

Ali found herself in the kitchen with Julie, the host of the party. The blonde smiled at her as they both ladled punch into their cups. “Are you having a good time?”

“Yeah! Thanks for inviting me.”

“Of course! Killer costume, by the way.”

“Thanks! And you are… one of the girls from Baywatch?”

Julie rolled her eyes good naturedly. “No, I’m the lifeguard from The Sandlot, Wendy Peffercorn. You know, the one that has to do mouth to mouth on the nerdy kid when he fakes drowning? Zach is dressed as Squints, but if we’re not standing next to each other then… Well, I guess I’m just a slutty girl in a red swim suit,” she shrugged with a laugh.

“Well you look great.”

“You run a bakery, right?”

“Yeah, Pattycakes.”

“I know you’re probably going into a really busy time, but Zach and I’s church is having a benefit in a few weeks, do you take on catering gigs?”

“Of course, let me just-” Ali stopped and laughed. “I would normally hand you one of our business cards, but none of them seemed to make it into my gun holsters.” Julie snorted. “But just swing by the bakery, I’m there pretty much every day. We can discuss packages and prices and such.”

“Awesome! Seriously, that would be great.” They walked from the kitchen to the dining room, where several people were gathered around watching Zach and Megan take on Ashlyn and Kelley in beer pong. “Oh my god. I leave the room for one minute and it turns into a frat house. Where did you guys even find ping pong balls?” Julie asked, stepping towards her husband. Ali laughed and continued into the living room, then onto the back deck.

It was chilly outside, but it was a nice change after the body heat filled house. She leaned against the railing and tipped her head back, looking up at the stars. Behind her, the door slid open and shut.

“Hey, everything alright?”

She turned to grin at Sue. “Yeah! Just grabbing some air. What are you doing?”

“I was originally looking for Meg.”

“Ah, she and Zach teamed up for beer pong. I think they were winning.”

Sue shook her head. “We’ll never get to leave.” She stepped next to Ali, pausing to take a sip out of her beer. “I uh… I never really got to talk to you. Y’know, in the aftermath of what happened at the bakery.”

“Yeah… Yeah. Thanks, by the way, for coming to get Ash. The next day she explained, and well… thank you. For picking her up and not letting her go home alone.”

“Of course. I was happy to help. Do the police have any leads?”

Ali shook her head slightly. “Not really.”

“I don’t know all the details, but I do know that I’ve rarely seen Meg as upset as when she finally came to bed that night.”

Ali dropped her gaze to where her hands were gripping the railing. “It wasn’t great.”

“Are you okay? I mean, obviously you’re here, and you’re fine. You’re pushing through. But… how’s it going?”

She shrugged. “For the most part I don’t really think about it. I get up and do my job, I come home and live my life. But… there are times when I wonder who those boys have told what happened. What they did… and what they saw.”

“They saw you and Ash together?” Ali nodded, and Sue let out a long breath. “I remember once when I was young, probably a freshman in college, I had my first girlfriend. And my family kinda knew, my friends, but it wasn’t something you really talked about. I was playing ball and I was pretty damn good, I had dreams of playing after college. I didn’t want to do anything that would hurt my chances. But one day after practice, my girl came to pick me up and I kissed her in the car, while we were still in the parking lot. Some of my teammates saw and… it’s crazy looking back now, as an openly gay sportswriter who’s engaged to another woman, but there was such a culture of fear. It’s something I’ve never quite been able to forget.”

“I wish I could just shrug my shoulders. Say that I don’t give a fuck and plow on. But…”

“But it’s not that simple. It never is.” Sue glanced at her. “Your parents don’t know, do they?”

Ali snorted, bringing her cup to her lips. “No. No, they don’t. And… I get it! I’m a grown woman, I should just tell them and get it over with, I shouldn’t be living with this underlying fear that somehow, they’re going to find out, but I just… I can’t find the courage to take that step. I can’t afford for them to not take it well.”

“How do you think they’re going to take it if they hear it from someone else?” Ali jerked her head up to look at her, and Sue quickly brought up her hands. “Not that, that I’m going to tell them, or any of us for that matter, but just… As a reporter I’ve learned that things always get out, especially the things you most want to stay quiet. It’s just the nature of secrets.”

“I don’t want Ashlyn to be a secret. I want to… to scream it from the rooftops.”

“And someday you will. I have faith in you guys.”

Ali bumped her shoulder gently into Sue’s. “Coming from you, that means a lot. And… I’m gonna tell them. I’m just not quite sure when. Or how, for that matter.”

“You’ll know in the moment. Just trust your gut.”

The door slid open behind them. “There you are! Jesus, aren’t you cold?”

Ali turned to face Ashlyn. “No, it feels good.”

“And you! Your girlfriend is a dirty cheat.”

“I take it you didn’t win?” Ali asked, wrapping an arm around her waist as Sue laughed.

“No. And we were so close,” Ashlyn pouted. “I’m ready to go.”

Ali smiled at Sue. “That’s my cue.”

“Alright, I’m gonna go find Meg. Get home safe, alright? Shoot one of us a text.”

“Will do.” Ali and Ash made their way back into the house, through the crowd of people to gather their coats and say goodbye. Once outside, they walked arm in arm to Ashlyn’s jeep.

“What were you and Sue talking about?”

“Oh, a little of everything.”

“I’m so glad you get along well with all of my friends.”

“Duh, I’m awesome.”

Ashlyn laughed. “There’s that signature modesty.”

“What, it’s true!”

 “You’re lucky I love you.” She felt Ash freeze as they both processed her words. Ali stopped walking, turning to face her.

“What?”

“Not, that’s not, no-”

“You don’t love me?” Ali’s heart was sinking in her chest.

“No, I do! I… I love you, Ali. That’s not how I had planned to tell you, but I do. I love you.”

Butterflies erupted in Ali’s stomach and she smiled up at her girlfriend. “I love you, too.”

X

“Hello, hello!” Ali looked up from the recipes she was paging through to see her mom.

“Hey! What are you doing here?”

Deb gave her a look, raising an eyebrow. “We… had plans, remember? Late lunch followed by pedicures?”

Ali glanced back down at the pages in front of her, her mind frantically trying to catch up. “Oh! Yeah, sorry, it just… it slipped my mind.”

“Can you still duck out?”

Ali began to clean up her station. “Yeah, just give me a second.” She walked to the front. “Christen, I’m heading out for the day, do you need me for anything?”

She shook her head as she finished counting back a customer’s money. “You’re good.”

She went back and grabbed her coat from where her mom was waiting by the door. “I’m all yours, let’s head out.”

Deb didn’t bring it up until they were seated at their favorite table in a nearby café. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah.” Ali smiled, glancing up from her menu. “Everything’s fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. Why?”

Deb took a sip from her glass of tea. “You just seem… different, lately. You’re more distracted, things are slipping your mind. Not the Alex I’ve always known and loved. What’s changed?”

Ali felt her heart lurch slightly. “I… it’s just a busy time at the shop. I mean, Alex is getting bigger every day, I interviewed a few temporary replacement chefs today, for while she’s on maternity leave. Fall is always a popular time for baked goods. And… I don’t know, my life is just busy right now. I recently joined a running group. That’s been nice.”

“A running group?”

“Yeah! One of my customers is in charge of it, and she invited me. It’s been nice to be physically active again. Not that going to the gym isn’t great, but I had missed the experience of running with other people outside, you know?”

The waiter came up. “Hello ladies! Same as usual?”

“Yes, tomato bisque with half a turkey club,” Deb handed back her menu.

“Actually… Can I try your chicken cordon bleu sandwich?”

“Of course. We’ll get that right out.”

“And you never told me how it went with Tyler.”

Ali took a slow, deep breath. “Yeah. We went out for dinner, but it didn’t go anywhere.”

“Why not? Ali, he’s such a nice young man-”

“We just didn’t click.”

“Well sometimes you don’t at first! Sometimes you have to work for it! I don’t see how you think you’ll ever find someone to settle down with unless you’re meeting people and dating around.”

“What, you want me to start sleeping my way through Alexandria’s eligible bachelors until I stumble onto a prince?” Ali snapped before she could stop herself.

“Alexandra!”

“Um… Tomato bisque?” They both awkwardly accepted their food from the waiter, who looked as if he wished he could have heard the rest of their conversation. Once he had walked to a different table, Ali took a deep breath.

“I… I’m sorry, I didn’t… I’m sorry.” The restaurant seemed unbearably warm all of a sudden. She pushed up the sleeves of her long sleeve shirt, trying to calm down. “It’s just… I’ve been going through some stuff, and I didn’t… I don’t know how to tell-”

“What is that?!” Deb reached out and grabbed Ali’s hand, straightening out her arm so that she could get a closer look at the tattoo decorating her inner forearm.

Ali groaned. “Mom-”

“Since when do you have a tattoo?”

“I, it was, a few weeks ago,” she mumbled, her stomach sinking. For a moment, she had really thought it was going to happen, that she was going to tell her mom, but she could see now that the conversation was going in a different direction and, just like the coward she was, she let it go.

Chapter Text

Ashlyn awoke to a pounding on her door. She groaned and rolled over, pulling the pillow over her head to try and block it out, but whoever it was refused to give up. Finally, she threw the pillow at the wall in a huff, turning over to stare at the ceiling with a yawn.

She dragged herself out of bed, pausing along the way to grab yesterday’s shirt from the top of her hamper. She blearily pulled it on as she made her way to the front door. She threw it open, ready to give a piece of her mind to whoever was on the other side, but stopped short.

“Mom?”

“Ashlyn.” She stumbled forward into her daughter’s arms, collapsing as she began to sob.

“What- how did you get here? What’s going on?” Her brother came trudging up to her door, pulling two suitcases behind him. “Chris?”

“Hey, Sissy,” he sighed. “C’mon Mom, let’s get you inside.”

Ashlyn ushered her mother inside, steering her towards the couch. Chris pushed the door shut.

“Can you believe this? Can you believe he would do this?”

“What’s going on?” Ashlyn asked again, this time more insistently.

“It would seem that Dad is having an affair.” Her mom began to cry harder into Ashlyn’s shoulder, and she met her brother’s eyes.

“The waitress?” she mouthed silently. He nodded.

“Oh Mom. I’m so sorry.”

“After all the years we spent together, how could he do this? We get in one little fight and he runs off to some stupid nineteen-year-old whore’s bed?” she choked out.

“Okay, there’s no need to name call-” But that seemed to be the exact wrong thing to say.

“She slept with a married man, Ashlyn! My husband! Do I not get to be upset?!”

“No, you do, I didn’t mean…” She sighed. “Did you guys fly here?”

“No, we drove.”

She glanced back at Chris. “What?”

He rolled his eyes. “Twelve hours. Overnight.”

She rubbed her mom’s back. “You must be exhausted. Why don’t you go lay down in my bed, okay? Everything will be better after you get some sleep.” She honestly didn’t care about how tired she was, she just knew that she was bordering on hysterical and if she wanted a chance to talk to her brother and get some answers this would be the best opportunity.

“Sleep isn’t going to change the fact that he cheated on me!” But she let Ashlyn steer her towards the bedroom anyway.

Once she was in bed with the door shut, Ash walked back to the living room. Chris was sitting in her armchair, a hand over his eyes. “A little warning would have been nice.”

He looked over at her and raised a finger. “Don’t even start. It was a fucking disaster. Mom caught the girl at the house.”

“What?! He brought her home?”

Chris shrugged. “Mom had been staying with Grandma, I can only imagine he thought it was safe. But Mom lost her goddamn mind. The police came, as per usual, and Dad and Raylee left.”

“Raylee? What kind of a name is Raylee?”

“A child’s name.”

“Okay, so…”

“Mom started drinking. Mrs. Crenshaw came over to check on Mom, and she ended up calling me because Mom was threatening to drive to Dad’s bar. When I got there, she changed her mind and said she was going to come see you. She told me if I wanted to come, great. If not, she was coming anyways. And I didn’t want to take a chance on her drunk ass trying to drive to Virginia alone, so here we are. Drove all night.”

“Fuck, you must be exhausted.”

He shrugged, shaking out his hands. “Honestly I’m so wired I can’t even feel it.”

She looked at him for a long moment. “How many did you take?”

He shrugged again. “Two? Maybe three addys? Plus coffee.”

“Jesus, Chris. You’re gonna have a heart attack.”

He chuckled. “I’m fine.”

“You still could have called.”

“Well, we’re here now.”

“For how long?”

“Who even knows? Mom should calm down in the next few days. Key word being should, I don’t know that I’ve ever seen her like this.”

“Well, Dad’s never fucked up this bad before.”

They both sat for a while, staring at the wall. “I swear to god, if we end up with a step mom named Raylee who can’t even legally drink, I’m gonna kill Dad,” Ash said finally.

Chris laughed. “I don’t know what the fuck he’s thinking.”

“Probably that he’s old and tired of going at it with Mom.”

“Maybe. It’s nice to see you, Ash. Sorry, it’s not under better circumstances.”

“It’s fine. I’m happy to see you, too. It’s just too bad that it’s all because of Boozy in there,” she said gesturing to the closed bedroom door.

“I don’t think she slept the whole way here. Just sat in the passenger seat and whimpered and cried. When I would try to turn up the radio she would start loudly talking over it.”

“What a mess.” She thought for a second. “Hungry?”

He grinned. “You know I always am.”

She stood up and shoved her feet into a pair of sneakers. “C’mon. You can pay me back for waking me up by buying me breakfast.”

X

‘Hey babe, still on for dinner?’ Ashlyn let out a slow breath as she stared down at her phone. It had been two days since her mom and brother had rolled into town, and she hadn’t brought it up to Ali. It wasn’t that she didn’t want her to know. She just wasn’t sure how she felt about Ali getting dragged into the white trash mess her family insisted on being.

‘So fun news, my mom and bro are here’

‘What?? That’s exciting! Well I completely understand if you wanna cancel and hang out with them!’

Ashlyn took a second, trying to figure out what she wanted.

‘Well how would you feel about dinner for four instead of two?’

‘You want me to meet your fam?’

‘Yeah’

She felt a small flash of panic and sent another text.

‘I mean, if you want. No pressure!’

‘That sounds great :)’

Ashlyn couldn’t help but wonder if this was the right call. She hadn’t met Ali’s family, but she could tell that they had provided a significantly different upbringing from the one she’d had in Satellite Beach. She wasn’t counting on her mom to behave, no matter who was joining them for dinner. She could only hope that Ali wouldn’t be scared off.

She was already at the restaurant when Ashlyn and her family arrived. She was wearing a sweater dress and tights, her coat draped over arm as she sat inside and waited. She stood up with a nervous smile when Ash walked in.

“Hey.”

“Hey babe. You look great.” She leaned in and pressed a covert kiss to Ali’s cheek, aware as always that they were in public. “Ali, this is my mom. Mom, meet Ali.”

“It’s nice to meet you.”

“You, too.” She smiled and gave a little nod.

“And this is my brother, Chris.” He leaned around their mom to shake Ali’s hand.

“You’re even prettier than Ashlyn said.” Ali flushed and he grinned. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“I guess we should get a table, then?”

“Sounds good.” Ali gestured to the hostess and the four of them followed her back to a table.

“So how did you two meet?” Tammye asked as they settled in.

“Ali runs a bakery, she’s making Pinoe’s wedding cake.”

“Oh is that right?”

“Yeah! Ash came in with her to the initial booking.”

“And then came back a few more times to try and feel her out,” Ashlyn laughed.

“Ashlyn is nothing if not dedicated when a girl catches her eye,” Chris smirked. “She always has been.”

“Oh god, don’t start,” Ash groaned, making Ali laugh.

“Uh oh, what’s that about?”

Chris grinned and settled back in his chair, crossing his arms. “Picture it. Satellite Beach, Florida, Ashlyn is… eight years old?”

“I was ten!”

“Sure. She has a teacher named Mrs. Hendricks. Not related to Christina Hendricks, but they do bear a certain resemblance. And Ash is in love with her. She went from awful English student to top of the class. Which is remarkable because I’m pretty sure she just spent the entire time staring at her giant-”

“Chris,” Ashlyn grumbled.

“Anyway. It’s Valentine’s Day. All the kids have brought their little scooby doo valentines or whatever, they’re having their class party, and Ashlyn, in all her awkward glory, decides to stand up on a chair, and read everyone a love poem she had written.”

“You didn’t!” Ali gasped.

“I did.”

“And it goes like this:

The sun comes up,

To start the day,

I jump out of bed,

There’s not time to play.

I catch the bus,

I just can’t wait,

Can’t take a chance,

Can’t be late.

I run into school,

No time for tricks,

Because I love you,

Mrs Hendricks.”

Ashlyn had her face buried in her hands. “I cannot believe you still have that memorized.”

“I can’t believe you don’t.”

“I can’t believe you haven’t written me any love poetry yet,” Ali teased.

“I got called to the school, they were less than pleased,” Tammye laughed.

“I got to spend a lot of time with the guidance counselor, they thought I had something weird going on.”

“Turns out she was just the most exuberant baby butch to ever grace the beaches of Florida,” Chris cracked.

“Well, I think it’s adorable,” Ali clarified, bumping her shoulder into Ashlyn’s as her face slowly returned a normal color.

“Oh if you think that’s adorable, just wait until you hear about her first college girlfriend!”

The rest of the night went great, the four of them talking and laughing, Chris having plenty of stories to embarrass his little sister with. They eventually parted ways with Ali, and Ashlyn drove them back to her place.

After their mom had gone to bed, Ash and Chris stayed up for a while talking.

“So I have to say, I’m also very surprised that you haven’t written Ali any love poetry.”

“Fuck off,” she snorted.

“I mean, you’re obviously head over heels in love with her."

"Well... yeah," she said, and he raised his eyebrows.

"Woah, I wasn't expecting you to admit it that easily."

"Well I am. I... love her so much. More than I think I've ever loved anyone else."

Chris's eyes softened. "I'm happy for you."

She grinned. "Thanks. I keep having... big thoughts. Big, scary, awesome, terrifying thoughts. About her, and our future, and what it all could be if I don't fuck it up."

"Hey. You're not gonna fuck anything up. You obviously care about her."

She gave him a sarcastic smile. "That hasn't stopped me before."

"Still. What's meant to be, will be."

"Since when did you get so poetic?"

He grinned and bumped his shoulder into hers. "I learned from the best."

Chapter Text

Ali bounced on her toes, peering around the airport. She knew Kyle’s flight had arrived and deboarded, now it was just a matter of finding him in the throngs of Thanksgiving travelers,

“Gobble gobble, bitch.” She whirled around to find her brother standing behind her, grinning and as handsome as ever.

“Kyle!” She threw her arms around him and he lifted her into the air, spinning them in a circle, much to the displeasure of the crowds trying to get around them.

“Do we need to grab your bag?”

“Nope, I just have the carry-on.”

She gave him a teasing look. “My brother, only bringing one carry-on for a four day trip? Are you feeling okay?” She reached up to try and feel his forehead and he rolled his eyes.

“Excuse you, I am perfectly capable of paring down to the essentials when I need to.”

“Well I guess there really is a first time for everything.”

He threw an arm around her shoulder and they began to walk through the airport. “So get me up to speed, what’s happening?”

“Dad’s at work, he’ll be off normal time. Mom was going to tag along to pick you up but she’s working on the turkey.”

“And did you…”

She grinned. “Yes, I made you a loaf of the cranberry bread you love so much.”

“You’re the best sister a boy could ask for.”

“Keep that in mind when I’m trying to book an appointment at Chez Krieger, stylist on the go.”

He groaned. “Alex I’m supposed to be on vacation!”

“Well you don’t come back very often! I have to take advantage when I can!”

“You could come and see me.”

“And leave the bakery unmanned?”

“You mean like me and the salon?” he countered.

She gave him her very best puppy dog eyes as they got to her car. “C’mon… for me? Your favorite sister? Who made you cranberry bread? I just need a trim!”

He gave an exaggerated sigh that turned into a grin. “I bet I can squeeze you in.”

She gave a squeal, clapping her hands. “You’re the best!”

“And you better never forget it.”

X

The Kriegers’ Thanksgiving dinner had turned out well. Sure, the turkey was a little bit dry, but everyone did their best to assure Deb that it didn’t matter, it was still tasty. They had moved on to dessert, the four of them drinking hot cocoa as they sampled the desserts Ali had provided.

“Alex these brownies are to die for. What’s in the middle?”

She swallowed her bite of apple pie. “Carmel and dark chocolate chips.”

Her dad hummed. “It’s incredible.”

“Kyle did you hear that Liam Hemsworth and Miley Cyrus are split up again?” Deb asked.

He shook his head. “I guess I hadn’t even heard that they were back together.”

Their mom rolled her eyes. “Apparently she was seen making out with some trashy girl on a yacht. The gossip magazines are talking all about it, applauding her for being bisexual or something.”

Ali couldn’t stop her eyebrows from crawling upwards, not quite able to suck in a deep breath. “Oh?”

“It’s silly. She’s just… troubled. She’s acting out, the same way she has ever since she went off her rocker. But no, everyone wants to assign more worth to it than it has. I just don’t understand why we have to talk about it at all. Why does it matter?”

Ali licked her lips. “Maybe… it’s important that we talk about it… just to make it more visible.”

“But why? Who cares?”

“It’s about representation.”

“And just the very idea… like Kyle I can understand that you like boys. I like boys. That makes sense. But this whole, I don’t know switching back and forth? It seems like people just wanting to talk, wanting attention. I mean, I’ve never known someone who was bi-whatever. It’s not a real thing.”

“I’m bisexual.” The words had left her lips before she could process that she was speaking, and her stomach dropped to her knees.

Her parents both stared at her, their faces blank as they processed what she had said. “Alex… that’s not a funny joke,” Ken finally said.

“I’m not joking.”

“Really honey, it’s a little insensitive to your brother.”

Ali glanced at Kyle, whose eyes were wide as he took in the scene unfolding in front of him. “No… it’s not. It’s, it’s who I am.”

“Bisexual is just… it’s something gay men say before they want to be called gay, and something slutty college girls say for attention.”

Her mom’s words cut to her core. “Mom, that’s not fair. Or right.”

She gave a shaky laugh. “Ali stop this. “You’ve dated men your entire life, you’re as straight as anyone.”

Hurt began to bloom in her chest. “I’m only as straight as you’ve wanted me to be.”

Ken stood up to take his plate to the sink. “Sweetheart where is this even coming from?”

She stood up from the table. “From… from the fact that it’s true? It’s true and it, it always has been! I’ve been kissing girls since I was in junior high-”

“Lots of girls practice kissing with their friends, it’s normal-“

“Do they practice going down on other girls?”

“Alexandra!” Her father whipped around to face her, and out of the corner of her eye she could see Kyle covering his mouth with his hand, staring at her in something akin to horror. “You will not speak to your mother that way.”

“Well what choice do I have, when you’re refusing to listen to me? I’m trying to tell you something important and you’re just dismissing me.”

“Well, I’m terribly sorry, but this is coming out of nowhere!”

“No, I’m sorry Dad, I’m sorry I’m not what you wanted me to be, I’m so sorry that this is such a disappointment.” She began to walk towards the living room then stopped and turned back to face them. “No, you know what? I’m not sorry. I’m not sorry because this is just who I am, and nothing can change that. And I’m just trying to be honest with you guys, and you’re just… you’re just…” Tears rushed at her eyes and she cut off, hugging her arms tight to her body.

“Alex. You’re… obviously very worked up about this. And I’m sorry for what I said. I shouldn’t have… you’re not a slutty college girl. But I think you’re letting your emotions get the best of you. I mean, you may have… experimented with girls,” her mom’s face twisted as her brain tried to wrap around what she was saying, “but you’ve never dated a woman. And really, what’s the need to put a label on this, chances are you’ll end up with a man.”

She stared back and forth between the two of them. “You have no idea what I have and haven’t done.”

“And that’s our fault? You decided to drop this on us at 29 years old, and then get mad when we’re confused? When you’ve apparently been feeling this way for a long time but never bothered to tell us?”

She gave her dad a hard look. “I wonder why, Dad.” She gestured towards Kyle.

“That’s not fair. We have apologized to your brother.”

“Well you never apologized to me!” Ali’s voice cracked as she lost her battle against the tears wanting to fall. “Kyle’s not the only one who was told that not a single person could know he was gay, that it was shameful, that if people found out they would talk. Do you know what it’s like to hear that as a fifteen-year-old?”

Kyle walked over to where she was standing. “Ali, maybe you should take a breath-”

“No! You ran away and you didn’t have to hear anymore about it. You didn’t have to listen to all of the awful, homophobic shit Grandpa said!

Now her mom jumped to her feet. “Don’t you- he was of a different generation, Ali.”

“Why do we let people have that excuse? Like just because you’re old means you have a pass to have a heart full of hate?”

“Alex you need to calm down.”

“You just haven’t found the right man, yet.” Her mom insisted. “You wouldn’t even give Tyler McAllister a chance-”

“Because I have a girlfriend!” Ali yelled. Everyone froze.

“You… what?”

“A… I have a girlfriend.”

“Who?” her mother asked. “Alex from the bakery?”

Ali gave a choked laugh. “Alex? Seriously? Yeah, Mom, it’s Alex, my married coworker who’s heavily pregnant with her husband’s child. Sure. Just go ahead and assume that since I’m bisexual I don’t have even the slightest sense of moral integrity.”

Her dad put a hand on her mom’s shoulder. “Is it someone we know?”

She shook her head. “No, I… no.”

Deb looked up at her. “That night at the bakery… your friend. The one who told the paramedic that the boy grabbed you. It was her?”

Ali nodded haltingly. “Yeah. Ash was with me.”

“And she just left you?” her dad asked.

“She left because you guys showed up. She knew that I hadn’t told you guys yet, and she didn’t want to force me to come out if I wasn’t ready.”

“I just don’t understand, Ali. We’ve always been so close. Why didn’t you just tell me?”

Ali looked at her mom through tear filled eyes. “Because I couldn’t take the chance that you would react the way you did with Kyle. And can you honestly blame me?”

Kyle cleared his throat. “I think… maybe everyone needs to take a minute. Everyone needs to breathe, process. Ali, why don’t I drive you back to your apartment?”

“We need to talk about this-” Ken started, but Kyle held up a hand.

“Not right now. Someone’s just going to end up saying something they regret. We can talk at breakfast tomorrow, after everyone has gotten some sleep.”

Ali felt like she was in a fog as she grabbed her coat and purse, Kyle gently pulling the latter from her hands. She didn’t say anything to her parents as she made her way to her car. She didn’t know what else there possibly was to say.

She and Kyle rode in silence to her apartment. He took her hand and led her up the stairs, through her front door. She stood in the middle of her kitchen, unsure of what to do, how to feel.

“Al?” She turned her head slightly towards him. “What do you need? Do you wanna watch a movie? Go to sleep?” She rubbed at her eyes. This whole thing had been a fucking disaster. She had been an idiot to ever think it could be anything else. “Do you want Ashlyn?”

She finally met his eyes and nodded. He dug through her purse and pulled out her phone. He tapped through her contacts before bringing it to her ear.

“Hi, is this Ashlyn? We’ve never actually met, but this is Kyle, Ali’s brother.” He listened for a second. “It’s nice to finally talk to you, too. Listen… I’m sure you probably are with friends or family for Thanksgiving, but is there anyway you could come to Ali’s apartment?” Ali slowly walked to her couch, kicking off her shoes and curling up in the corner. “Yeah, she did. It went… not well. I think tomorrow when everyone has had a chance to calm down and process what’s been said things will be okay. Not great, but… anyways. I think Ali could really use you right now.” She watched as he nodded into the phone. “Okay. Yeah, see you in a bit.”

He joined her on the couch, wrapping his arms around her. “It’s all going to be fine in the end, Alex. I know things seem rough right now, but… it’ll be okay.”

“I can’t believe Mom asked me if I was hooking up with my pregnant coworker.”

“I can’t believe you yelled at Mom and Dad about screwing girls.”

“What if we never recover from this?”

He shook his head. “You will. I promise. And if you don’t… would you have rather lived in secret for the rest of your life?” He stroked her hair as they waited for Ashlyn to arrive.

When she knocked on the door, Kyle stood up to let her in. Ali trailed behind him, feeling lost. Ashlyn held out her hand for a handshake, but Kyle pulled her in for a hug, giving her a squeeze. He let her come in all the way and she hurriedly shrugged out of her coat before crossing to Ali and pulling her into her arms. The familiar scent of her body wash hit Ali’s nose, and that was all it took for her last defenses to fall. The floodgates opened and she sobbed into Ashlyn’s shoulder.

She hoped that she had done the right thing, but from where she was standing it was unclear. It felt a lot like she’d just ruined her own life. But maybe, just maybe, it was worth it if that meant she was a step closer to always being with the woman whose arms were making her feel safe and loved.

Maybe.

Chapter Text

It had taken a while for Ali to stop crying. Once she did, she had looked like she was about to fall over from exhaustion and allowed Ashlyn to steer her into her bedroom. Ash had held her in her arms, stroking her hair, wishing she had the magic words to make everything okay.

When she woke up the next morning, Ali was still fast asleep. Wanting to give her a chance to rest, she eased out of bed and crept into the kitchen. She found Kyle sitting on the couch, clutching a cup of coffee and watching a talk show with the volume turned down.

“There she is. Good morning!”

She smiled, still trying rub the sleep from her eyes. “Is there more coffee where that came from?”

“Yup, there should still be half a pot in the kitchen.”

He didn’t say anything else until she settled next to him on the couch. “Thank you for last night. For coming over so quickly, she… She was upset, and I wasn’t the person she needed.”

“Of course. I’d do anything for her.” The words fell from her lips before she had the chance to process them, but she didn’t regret them.

“I can see that,” he smiled. “And she feels the same way.”

She blew on her coffee. “So… how bad was last night exactly?”

He exhaled sharply through his nose. “It was not great. A lot of casual biphobia being thrown around. A lot of disbelief. Alex stuck to her guns, which I am so proud of her for, but a lot of shit was said. I guess I hadn’t realized…”

“What?”

He gave his head a slight shake. “When… when my family, or my grandpa really, started talking about conversion therapy, I ran. I knew I had to get the fuck out and fast. On some level, I had picked up on the fact that Alex wasn’t completely straight, but I also knew that it would take her longer to get there. I told myself… that it would be better for her if I went. That things would be less messy at home. But I guess I’ve really never understood what it was like for her in the aftermath of me running away.”

Ash gave a slight nod. “She hasn’t said much, but from what I gather it wasn’t great.”

“Yeah.” He sighed. “I’m her big brother. All I’ve ever wanted was to protect her. I’m not sure if I did.”

“You had to do what was best for you.”

“That’s what I told myself. And on some level, yeah, I did. But at what cost, y’know? I abandoned her.”

“I don’t think she sees it that way.”

“I know.” They both sipped in silence for a moment. “My mom has been messaging me this morning.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. She texted both me and Alex, but I replied to her individually so we wouldn’t wake her up. She wants us to go to lunch.”

“Oh. I guess I maybe should get out of your hair then, let you guys get ready.”

“No honey, she wants all of us to go to lunch, you included.”

Ashlyn looked back at him in alarm. “Me? Why me?”

“I… I’m not sure. Part of me is hoping this is her extending the proverbial olive branch, wanting to prove to Alex that she doesn’t care, that she can accept her no matter what. And part of me is wondering if she wants to meet you to figure out…”

“Figure out what?”

“Figure out how you managed to turn me into a lesbian.” They both looked over their shoulders to find Ali in the doorway. She shrugged. “That would be my guess anyway.”

“Morning, baby.”

Ali walked forward and ran her hand through Ashlyn’s hair. “Morning. You don’t have to go.”

“What?”

“You don’t owe her anything. You don’t have to meet her for lunch so that she can interrogate you. Especially since your mom and Chris are in town.”

“Mom was pretty insistent that she and Dad wanted to have dinner with the three of us. Well, really just you two, but I would be there for moral support.”

“Well she doesn’t get everything she wants just because she says so! The rest of us don’t exist to come to her beck and call.”

“Alex.” Kyle gave his sister a look before turning back to Ashlyn. “Miss Brattypants is right, though; you shouldn’t cancel on your family.”

“No, it’s okay. We don’t have any plans until later on tonight. I… I don’t mind coming.” She took Ali’s hand. “I want to be there for you.”

“It’s probably going to get nasty. At the very least it’ll be awkward and uncomfortable.”

“Thick or thin, I’m your girl.”

Ali smiled and leaned down to kiss her gently, making Kyle roll his eyes and pretend to gag. “Okay, you two are way too cute. I can’t handle it on an empty stomach.”

Ali came around the couch and settled between them. “So when and where are we meeting Mom?”

“She suggested 12:30 at Fontaine.”

Ali snorted as she stole a sip of coffee from Ashlyn’s mug. “Does she think if we go somewhere fancy we’ll be more like to behave?”

“She’s probably counting on it, so you won’t yell something about eating girls out again.”

Ash coughed, her face flushing slightly. “I’m sorry, what exactly did I miss last night?”

Both Kriegers chuckled at her flustered reaction. “Let’s just say that someone wanted to make sure they took her Sapphic tendencies seriously,” Kyle explained, earning a nudge from his sister.

“Nothing. If we’re going to make a 12:30 reservation, we better start getting ready.”

X

Ashlyn trailed slightly behind Ali and Kyle as they walked over to where their parents were already sitting. She wiped her hands surreptitiously on her pants as she watched Deb stand up and hug both of them. She could feel the tension radiating off of her girlfriend as she stepped stiffly back. “Mom, this is Ashlyn.”

Ashlyn stuck out her hand and gave what she hoped was her most charming grin. Deb took her hand and shook it with a smile. “It’s nice to meet you, Ashlyn.” But her eyes were quickly darting around to take in every bit of Ashlyn she could, from her edges of her tattoos that were visible underneath her sweater to the hat perched on her head, before staring intently into her eyes. “I’m Deb.”

“It’s nice to meet you, too.” Deb let go of her hand, and Ashlyn turned to Ali’s dad. He gave her hand a quick shake, not quite meeting her eyes.

“Well, let’s have a seat, shall we?” The five of them got settled at the table, Deb directly across from Ashlyn. She watched as the older woman shook out her napkin and draped it across her lap. She then took a sip of water before fixing Ashlyn with a pointed stare and a smile that looked almost identical to the one she was used to seeing on Ali’s face, although this one was maybe a bit more forced.

“So. How did you two meet?”

Deb’s very direct eye contact left no doubt as to who she was asking. “My best friend is getting married. Her sister and fiancée were both busy the day Megan needed to go in and schedule the cake tasting, so I tagged along with her to the bakery.”

“I see. And what happened from there?”

“She came back and asked me out, and I said yes.” Ali answered in a clipped voice.

“I was asking Ashlyn.”

“Well, we were both there.”

“Do we maybe want to get an appetizer? You know, a plate to share for the table?” Kyle interrupted.

All five of them picked up their menus, staring down at them as if they contained the answers for how to navigate this lunch.

“We could do the cheese plate,” Ken suggested. They all agreed and spent the next few minutes perusing the rest of the menu. The waitress came by and took their orders, whisking away the menus as well as their ability to avoid the subject at hand.

The subject, of course, being Ashlyn.

“So you didn’t have to work today?”

“No, we’re closed today, we figured we wouldn’t have a ton of people coming in on the day after Thanksgiving.”

“Where do you work?”

“I’m a tattoo artist.” She watched as both Deb and Ken’s eyebrows raised.

“I see!” Deb finally gasped. “And so… I’m guessing you’re behind the lovely piece of work on Ali’s arm?”

“What?” Kyle and Ken asked in unison.

Ali let out a slow sigh, pulling up the sleeve of her sweater so they could see her tattoo.

“Yes queen! You did this, Ash?” Ashlyn nodded tightly. “This script work is amazing, maybe I’ll have to have you do my next one.”

“That’s pretty big, giving someone their first tattoo. Ali, weren’t you nervous?” Ashlyn couldn’t help but hear a different message behind her words. You corrupted my daughter. You talked her into getting a tattoo, just like you talked her into being a lesbian.

“Actually… it’s not my first.”

Both Ken and Deb’s heads snapped to look at her. “What?” Ali’s dad finally asked.

“It’s not. I have one on my side that I got when I was in Germany.”

“In Germany! Well… I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that we didn’t know, apparently you have lots of secrets that you haven’t told us.”

Ashlyn felt Ali tense up beside her and put a hand on her leg to try and calm her down. “I wouldn’t really call it a secret. Just none of your business.”

“Oh look at that! Our cheese plate is here! Here sweetheart, I’ll take those plates, if you wanna just pop that down in the middle. Alex, do you need a plate?” Kyle practically shoved the small appetizer plate into Ali’s arm, breaking the staring contest she was having with her mom.

Ashlyn gestured to the waitress. “Could I maybe get another glass of water?” What she really wanted was a glass of whiskey, but she couldn’t see how that would possibly endear her to her girlfriend’s parents. Besides, she needed to keep herself sharp and alert.

She could tell that Deb was not finished with her interrogation.

X

“Did I hear you say that your mom and brother went back to Florida?” Ash looked over at Earl, then back out the window at the slushy snow collecting on the road.

“Yeah, this past weekend. And just in time, neither one handle winter weather very well. They would be freezing to death,”

“Oh, because you’re not?” he teased, poking at the thick sweater she was wrapped up in.

“If you think I’m bad, I’m practically a polar bear next to them!”

“Did they enjoy their time here in Virginia?”

She shrugged. “My mom spent most of her time and energy being mad at my dad. But I think Chris had fun.”

“You must miss them when they’re not here.”

She chewed on the inside of her cheek. “Mm… yes and no. Does that make sense? I miss the idea of them. But in the flesh… they’re pretty exhausting,” she chuckled softly. “I do miss my grandma, though. My parents had custody of my brother and I, but I pretty much grew up at Grandma’s house. She’s the one who checked homework, who made sure we had dinner on the table and clean clothes to wear. Not that, that my parents were completely useless, but she was our one constant.”

“Do you think you’ll ever move back to Florida?”

She frowned as she considered the question. “I don’t know. Part of me misses the beach, misses the sun. I could probably be happy in one of the cities, maybe Orlando. But…” her mind wandered to a certain brunette. “I have a lot going on here. This is where my life is, y’know?”

He nodded, also staring out at the dreary December day. “Yeah. I know.” He shoved his hands into his pockets and sighed. “Well, I have some news.”

“Yeah?”

“I’m retiring.”

“What?” She turned to face him head on, sure she hadn’t heard him right.

“I’m retiring. I want to sell the shop.”

Her stomach dropped to her knees. She could just picture getting bought out by some moron who didn’t know a tattoo gun from his ass, having to put up with him trying to change things and tell her what to do. Or even worse, what if someone bought the shop but tore it down? Or turned it into something else? She would have to find a new shop to work at and pray that her regulars followed.

“Why?”

“I’m old, sweetheart. It’s time for me to go back down south, find a lazy boy to kick back in and get invested in the Weather Channel,” he teased, pushing his elbow into her arm.

Her mind was whirling. “Have you… I mean do you have a buyer in mind to take over?”

He nodded. “I do.”

She swallowed thickly. He sounded like his mind was made up, and nothing she could say would persuade him. “A tattoo artist?”

“Mhmm.”

“Have they owned or managed a shop before?”

“Eh, haven’t owned before. But pretty extensive experience in managing a shop, taking care of business. Good with customers but doesn’t take shit. A sucker for pretty girls, but also good with fellas. Will hopefully be able to keep Kelley in line.”

She was ashamed at the mess of tears collecting in her throat. He deserved to retire and do what he pleased; she was being selfish.

“When will I meet them?”

He turned to her, giving her a cryptic look. “Harris.”

“Yeah, Earl?” She kept her eyes focused on the snow, trying to calm her breathing.

“It’s you.”

She jerked around to look at him straight on. “What?”

Earl stared at her for a second, before slowly breaking into a grin. “It’s you. I want to sell the shop to you. I want you to take over.”

“Me?” Ashlyn was too shocked to be embarrassed of the way her voice cracked.

“Of course, you! You really think I would turn my pride and joy over to anyone else?”

“But…” Her mind whirled. “Me?”

He chuckled. “Well on second thought, maybe not. Not if it takes you this long to catch on to things.”

“But… but why? I… Earl I’ve been smart with my money, but I don’t have a lot in savings. And I can go to the bank for a loan but… you’ll be able to get way more from someone else. Enough for a great retirement. And I, I can stay on to manage, make sure they don’t fuck things up too badly, but you need to do what’s best for you.”

“Ashlyn.” He paused for a second, scratching at his chin. “I never got married. I was too busy chasing the wind to ever settle down. So I don’t have any kids. I don’t have any blood to pass my legacy on to. But I have you. I’ve known you since you were a stupid little punk, with your long blonde hair, and your penchant for getting in fights. And I’ve watched as you grew into the woman you are today, someone I’m damn proud to know. You… you’re family. And as such, I don’t want anyone else to get their hands on the Driving Club.”

Ashlyn felt the tears coming back full force. “But… but I don’t really have any money.”

He smiled. “We’ll get finances figured out later, but it was never about the money. It was always about carving out a place in the world, a place that was mine, and now I want it to be yours.” She threw her arms around him, and he patted her back. “I don’t know if I’ve made it clear enough, but I’ve always thought of you as a daughter.”

And with that, she lost her battle against the tears.

Chapter Text

“Do you need help carrying anything in?” Ali didn’t turn around to look at her mom, instead keeping her eyes focused on the boxes in the back of her car.

“I’m bringing in the cake, you can grab the cookies if you want.” She turned and tried to walk past her, but Deb blocked her path.

“Alex. Stop this.”

“What?”

“Look at me.” Ali did as she said. “I did not raise you to act like this.”

“Well, I’m upset with you.”

“Why?”

“Why?!” She let out a low laugh. “Why do you think?” Her mom had spent the entire Black Friday lunch grilling Ashlyn, asking every question she could possibly think of, from her criminal record to her dating history. And every time Ashlyn tried to respond, her answers were marked against her. By the time the check had come, Ali was practically paralyzed with just how angry she was, and Ashlyn had seemed close to tears when Ali had taken her home. “You were completely out of line.”

“So now it’s a crime to get to know the person your child is dating?”

“You never would have acted the way you did if she had been a guy, don’t try to act otherwise.”

“She has a criminal record!” her mom hissed.

“She got a DUI when she was young and stupid! She paid her fines and did her community service!”

“I’m just worried that you jumped into this without thinking things through.”

“Just because I did something without you being included in the decision-making process doesn’t mean it’s wrong.” Ali tried to walk around her, but she held out her hand.

“Alex. I… I don’t want to fight with you. And I don’t want you to think that I’m… upset because you’re dating a woman. Am I surprised? Yes. Confused? A little bit, yes. But at the end of the day, you are my daughter, the exact way that Kyle is my son. And I love you. I always have, and I always will. And I just… I’m just having a hard time wrapping my head around this whole thing. The whole bisexual thing. But that doesn’t mean I’m okay with you shutting me out of your life and giving me the cold shoulder.”

“I’m not… I know that it’s a lot. It took me a while to process it too. And I’m not asking for you to man the Virginia Pride parade or something. I just want… respect. And I want you to stop treating Ashlyn like she’s scum, because she’s not. She’s an amazing person.”

“All of her answers-”

“You got the answers you wanted! It was all in the questions you were asking. You didn’t hear about her relationship with her grandmother, and how she’s essentially the assistant manger of the tattoo parlor, or how she recently partnered with kid’s cancer charity, because you didn’t want to know any of the amazing things that make her the woman I love. That’s not on her, that’s on you.”

Deb stared back at her in shock, and Ali took a deep breath. “Look… we don’t have to do this right now. We’re here to celebrate Alex and the baby, not fight. Can we just… have this day? And laugh and talk and not be so freaking tense? Can we do that?”

Deb nodded, looking down at her hands for a moment. “I… yes. We can do that.”

“Thank you,” Ali whispered. Deb stepped forward and pulled her into an awkward hug, seeing as Ali’s arms were full of the cake box.

“I love you so much, Alex. Nothing will ever change that. I promise.”

“I love you too, Mom.”

Deb pulled back, swiping her fingertips quickly underneath her eyes. “Alright. Let’s get inside before someone comes looking for us.

The inside of the recreation hall had been decorated with yellow and green streamers, with clusters of balloons taped to seemingly anything that could be reached. Deb went to find the other women who she was hosting with, and Ali went straight to the cake table and began unboxing, not paying much attention to anyone else.  She knew that it was going to take her parents a little bit to fully catch up to everything, but at the same time she couldn’t see how anyone could meet Ash and not be completely charmed by her.

“Ali!” She looked up to see Rose bounding across the room. “You made it!”

Ali laughed. “Well, I was in charge of the baked goods, I couldn’t exactly skip out.”

“Your mom and the other hostesses have all sorts of games set up and one of them is you have to cut a piece of yarn that you think is the diameter of Alex’s stomach-“

“Diameter? I’m pretty sure you mean circumference.”

Rose waved her hand. “Don’t care. Anyway, you’re the one who spends the most time with Alex, how big is she?”

“You see her almost every weekend!”

“Well yeah, but she’s usually behind the counter where I can’t really see her!”

Ali laughed. “Well I’m not helping you cheat.”

“Aw, you’re no fun.”

Mal appeared at Rose’s shoulder. “Hey! You spend a lot of time looking at Alex’s stomach-”

“I’m not helping you cheat!”

Mal pouted for a second. “Fine. I’m still gonna win the game where you have to guess how many jellybeans are in the baby bottle.”

“How do you know? It’s just a guess,” Rose asked.

“Because. I have a system,” Mal answered cryptically.

Ali just laughed and left them to go find Alex in the baby shower madness.

Her shower ended up going beautifully. Mal somehow did end up winning the jellybean guessing game (although Rose insisted that she must have cheated), and Servando’s grandmother had the closest measuring yarn. After everyone had eaten their fill of cake and punch, everyone gathered around as Alex began to open her gifts. Ali settled between her mom and Becky, who she had gotten much closer to since joining the running group. Alex had even joined in on a few of their outings when Servando was playing across the country. She would sit with everyone’s bags while they ran, then go out for dinner with everyone.

“Thank you so much!” she gushed as she pulled out an adorable pair of footie pajamas with a rainbow on the front. “This is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen!”

“I’m glad you like it,” said the giver, Jaelene. Ali didn’t know her, apparently she was married to Alex’s cousin. “I almost didn’t buy it.”

“Why? I love it!”

“Well… it just feels like rainbow has been hijacked by other groups. And it’s hard because it used to mean one thing, but now you have to be careful.”

Ali’s entire body went very still. “Hijacked how?”

Jaelene glanced around, making a show of lowering her voice. “Well the rainbow used to have such a beautiful meaning. It was God’s sign of mercy after the flood, a promise that it would never happen again. But now, any time you see a rainbow it’s always something to do with the gays and that’s just not fair.”

Across from her, she saw Alex’s eyes go wide. “Jeri, can you pass me the next gift?” she asked, trying to defuse the situation.

“Surely it can stand for both. After all, aren’t we all God’s children? Doesn’t the promise extend to everyone?” Ali fought to keep her voice light and even.

“It represents God’s love for his children, it shouldn’t be used to represent such a disgusting sin.”

Deb’s hand came to rest on Ali’s knee, and she took a deep breath, trying to turn her attention back to the baby shower, but then she glanced across the circle and noticed Christen. Her eyes were trained in her lap, but Ali could tell that she was upset, nearing tears, and suddenly she was tired of being the bigger person. She wasn’t going to sit here and let this woman run her mouth and make Christen feel ashamed of something she should take pride in.

“Well I think the word Christian is supposed to represent someone who lives a life centered on love, and it sounds like you’re a shitty person who shouldn’t get to use that term to represent your own gross homophobia.” There was an audible intake of breath as everyone’s eyes flashed towards her. She made eye contact with Jaelene, refusing to back down.

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me.”

“You have no right to talk about my faith-”

“You have no right to talk about other people’s sexualities, but it’s not stopping you.”

“I was just trying to say that I think it’s a shame that the gays have overrun our society and turned us away from our Christian values. I mean, the legalization of gay marriage? The bible is very clear about marriage belonging between a man and a woman-”

“Well if I decide to marry my girlfriend, feel free not to come to our wedding.”

A second gasp rang out, and Ali’s eyes widened as she realized exactly what she had admitted to this group of women, some of whom she had never seen before, but some of whom she interacted with on a regular basis.

Jaelene seemed to be grasping for something to say. “I just… As a Christian, I have to speak up when something goes against God.”

“And as a lady, you should know when it’s time to shut your mouth and stop talking.” Ali’s head whipped around to look at her mom, who was giving Jaelene a cool stare. “And while we’re on the subject dear, hatred is an ugly color on you.” She turned back to Alex, who looked like this whole discussion might jumpstart her labor at any moment. “Who’s the next present from?”

Jeri handed Alex a gift bag, her jaw still hanging open in surprise. “This is from Aunt Shari.”

Ali sat back in her chair, her heart pounding. She couldn’t believe that she had just outed herself in front of all of these people. She turned to look at her mom, but Deb’s eyes were trained on Alex. So instead she reached out and grabbed her mom’s hand, giving it a tight squeeze.

X

Once the presents were done, Ali hopped up and began to gather up plates and trash from around the room, not wanting to awkwardly catch anyone’s eye. She was back in the kitchen area, cleaning off her cake serving utensils when she felt someone’s presence next to her. She glanced up to see Becky.

“Well I imagine that’s not how you pictured coming out.”

Ali snorted. “No, not quite. Not at all, in fact.”

“Do… you feel better?”

Ali stopped to really evaluate. “I’m not sure. I don’t think it’s really sunk in yet.”

“That’s fair. Well, for the record, I’m happy for you. And I’m proud of you, too.”

Ali bumped her shoulder into Becky’s. “Thanks. Y’know, maybe I’ll try to talk my girlfriend into coming to the running group.”

Becky hummed for a second. “Ashlyn doesn’t strike me as much of a runner.”

Ali shrugged but then froze. “Wait. You… know Ashlyn? And you know that she’s my…”

“I… didn’t know that you were officially dating. But I knew that she cared a lot about you, and I was hoping that things would work out.”

“But… you didn’t say anything!”

Becky shrugged. “It wasn’t my place. I figured that when you got to that headspace, if you wanted to tell me then you would. Didn’t picture it happening like this, though.” She glanced over her shoulder to make sure they were along. “I also didn’t picture your mom giving the verbal smackdown of the century.”

Ali stuttered out a laugh. “Oh my god, right? That was some… Southern-Emily-Post meets Thanksgiving-clapback level shit if I’ve ever seen it.”

Becky laughed, then put a hand on Ali’s shoulder. “Still. Regardless of how I found out, I’m glad that you and Ashlyn are together, and happy.”

Ali smiled. “We really are.”

Chapter Text

The days got colder and shorter, and before Ashlyn knew it, it was Christmas Eve. She had decided not to go home for the holiday, instead hosting all of her Virginia friends at her little house. Everyone had brought a potluck dish (even Kelly, although she had skipped over food and opted for a bottle of bourbon and a few cases of beer), and it had been a great evening. Christmas carols were playing from the speaker, making everything seem that much cozier. She had invited Ali of course, but she had reluctantly declined, saying that she needed to spend Christmas Eve with her parents and Kyle.

“I can’t believe that in just a month I’ll be Mrs. Megan Rapinoe-Bird.” Pinoe grabbed a handful of Chex mix from the counter.

“It seems like just yesterday we were dressing up for prom with dudes we couldn’t physically stand,” Ashlyn teased. “Remember Craig? Craig Applegate?”

Pinoe groaned and covered her face with her hand. “Poor Craig. I was trying so hard, but he just wasn’t it.”

Ashlyn grinned at Sue, who had an arm around her fiancée’s shoulders. “He wanted nothing more in life than to get into Pinoe’s pants.”

“Well I mean, can you blame him?” Sue cracked.

“We would go out and then he would park his mustang and we would kiss and kiss and kiss, and I would just sit there like… ‘When is this ever going to end?’ The one time he took his pants off I just stared at his dick at confusion.”

Ashlyn laughed harder at the memory. “You called me as soon as soon as you got home and told me you were going to be a nun, that sex just wasn’t for you. Thankfully I stepped in to remind you that there were other options than sex with dudes and a lifetime of celibacy.”

“For the record, I would have rocked the shit out of a habit.”

“Sure you would’ve, babe,” Sue kissed her cheek. “Wait, I didn’t think you ever dated dudes, Ash?”

She shrugged. “I didn’t really. I mean, I was crushing on girls pretty much from the time I exited the womb. And I came out to my parents in like… middle school. It was a non-issue. But I didn’t really talk about it at school. And a guy friend didn’t have a date for prom so we went together.”

“Everyone went out to a kegger afterwards and we got trashed playing beer pong. Ashlyn’s brother Chris had to come and get us.”

“All in all, not a bad prom night.”

Heather peeked her head around the doorway. “Uh your girlfriend called and Kelley answered, you might want to get your phone back from her.” Ashlyn rolled her eyes and followed HAO into the living room where, sure enough, Kelley was chattering away on the phone, one of her hands flying through the air as she did so.

“I’ll take that,” she said, sliding her phone out of Kelley’s grasp and bringing it to her ear. “Ali?”

“Hey,” she laughed. “I was starting to make my peace with talking to a tipsy Kelley for the rest of the night.”

Ash laughed. “Yeah, some unnamed person has been spiking the hot chocolate with a little something extra,” she said, earning a double middle finger from Kelley. She made her way out of the noisy living room, shutting herself in her bedroom. “How’s everything going at Chateau Krieger?”

“Good, we just got done watching Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.”

Ash gave a shiver. “Gross, the old clay animation one?”

“Duh! It’s the best.”

“If by the best, you mean one of the most terrifying kid’s movies to ever exist, sure Alex.”

Ali laughed. “Well you better get used to it. It’s my favorite, Kyle and I watch it every year. I can’t wait to watch it with my kids someday.”

Something new and warm made its way deep into Ashlyn’s stomach. She sat on the edge of her bed and pulled one of her pillows into her lap. “Kids? You’ve never mentioned those before.”

“Uh…” She heard Ali give a slightly breathy chuckle into the phone. “I guess I haven’t.”

“Do you want kids?”

“I mean… not now or anything. But I guess… when I’ve looked at the future, I’ve always pictured myself with… I don’t know. Do… do you?”

Ash laid down, holding the pillow to her chest. Maybe it was the holiday spirit, maybe it was the spiked hot chocolate Kelley had made her earlier, or maybe it was just the idea of maybe having a future with the woman on the other end of the line, but Ashlyn let herself sink into the idea of someday. “I do. I want… god I wish I could have a whole houseful. I’ve always wanted kids. I can’t wait to be a mom.”

Ali’s voice was soft. “Boys or girls?”

“Boys, girls, anything in between, whatever their little hearts feel, I don’t care. I just… I want to be the parent that neither of my parents could be. The parent my Grandma was and is. I want to make sure my kids feel loved and cherished and they know that I have their back no matter what.”

She was shocked to hear Ali give a muffled sob on the other end. “Alex? What…” She sat up as her mind frantically tried to catch up to this turn of emotions. “Baby, I didn’t mean-”

“No you’re fine! I’m not, not upset. I just… I like hearing you talk about kids. Your kids.” Our kids. Neither one of them spoke it out loud, not wanting to overstep some unseen line too early in their relationship. “You’re gonna be a great mom.”

“Yeah? You think so?”

“I know so. You’re just a big kid yourself,” Ali teased as she sniffed away the last of her tears, clearing her throat.

“Well… for the record, I think you’ll be great mom, too. Anyone as wonderful as you…” Ashlyn swallowed thickly. “What about you? Girls? Boys?”

“I don’t really care. I think I’d like to have at least one girl. When I picture having kids, it’s a little girl… I’ve always loved the name Rose. As a tribute to the rose in The Little Prince.” Aly gave a breathy laugh. “Anyway… yeah. A girl.”

“Hoping for someone to play dress up with?” Ashlyn teased.

“Hey, who’s the one playing to gender stereotypes now?” Ali joked back.

“You would be great with a little girl, I can see it.” Because she really could. She couldn’t stop her mind from imagining Ali waddling around, her stomach swollen and back aching, but still managing to look as beautiful as ever. She could see her holding a tiny baby, wrapped in a pink blanket with a huge bow headband. Her heart skipped a beat as she realized just how badly she wanted to see it in real life, how badly she wanted that future with Ali.

“I love you,” Ali whispered into the phone.

“I love you, too. So much.”

“Are you still down to come to Alex’s New Year’s Eve party?” After Ali had accidentally outed herself to all of the people at Alex’s baby shower, she’d taken steps to be more public about her relationship with Ashlyn. She’d even posted a picture of the two of them to her Instagram, one where Ash was kissing her cheek, leaving very little room for interpretation as to their relationship. Ashlyn was so proud of her, and happy that she was finally getting to take these steps. Everyone deserved to be unapologetically themselves, but especially someone as wonderful as Ali.

“I can’t wait.”

“Neither can Alex,” Ali laughed. Ashlyn had seen the other woman several times since Ali had come out to her, but they had never spent a long amount of time together. She couldn’t help but feel that this party was Alex’s way of truly getting to know her best friend’s girlfriend.

Pinoe stumbled into the bedroom. “You need to stop having yuletide phone sex with your girlfriend and come wrangle KO. She’s on your coffee table singing ‘Santa Baby.’”

“Oh god, I have to go. Kelley’s going to break something,” Ash laughed.

“Okay, I’ll let you go. Merry Christmas, baby. I love you.”

“I love you too, Alex. Merry Christmas.”

X

Alex’s New Year’s Eve party was a blast. Maybe it was because Alex couldn’t drink herself, but Ashlyn and Ali had their drinks filled to the brim all night. By the time the ball dropped, they had both been somewhere way past tipsy, and neither had particularly cared who was watching as their mouths crashed together in the first of what would hopefully be many New Year’s kisses.

They’d ended up taking a car back to Ali’s, making love long into the night, Ashlyn praying that this was a sign that only good things were to come in 2020.

She woke up with a wicked hangover, one matched by Ali’s, if her grumpy groans were to be interpreted correctly. They both stayed in her bed, cocooned in total darkness other than the light of Ali’s laptop playing episodes of The Good Place. At some point Ali ordered them pizza, which Ashlyn had blearily retrieved from an unimpressed looking delivery boy thirty minutes later.

Eventually though, she forced herself to pull from Ali’s arms and took a shower. She wore her jeans from the night before and a sweatshirt she had left at Ali’s during a previous sleepover. Ali had washed it for her, and Ashlyn breathed in the scent of her laundry detergent as she trudged her way into the tattoo parlor. She found Kelley in the back, her head resting on the break room table.

“Feeling rough?”

“Shhhh…” Kelley didn’t bother to lift her head. “’M dead. Be respectful,” she grumbled.

“Trust me. I’m feeling the same.” KO raised her head and Ashlyn raised her eyebrows. “On second thought, I think I’m thankfully feeling much better than you are.”

“I threw up in front of my apartment building.”

“Proud of you.”

“Then I laid down next to it.”

“Gross.”

“I’m gonna go throw up again. If I don’t come out, just assume I’ve died and leave me in peace.”

“Okay.”

Thankfully, New Year’s Day proved to not be a popular day for getting tattoos, so they both had time to sit around and try to revive themselves. Once they had downed a few bottles of water and ordered burgers from the diner down the street, both were feeling a little more stable.

Ashlyn was at one of the tables in the corner, sketching out an idea for a new tattoo when the door opened. She didn’t pay much attention, instead focusing on the paper in front of her. She didn’t look up until Kelley walked over.

“Hey, uh… there’s someone to see you.” Ashlyn looked around her and her jaw dropped. Standing just inside the door was none other than Ken Krieger. He met her eyes and gave an awkward half wave. She hurriedly came to her feet and walked over, offering him her hand.

“Hi. I um… I wasn’t expecting you.” She cringed at how defensive her voice sounded. He nodded.

“I was just… I wanted to talk to you.”

“Of course, yeah. We’ll… We can step into the back. Kelley, can you watch the front?”

Kelley nodded with a tight smile, looking uncharacteristically somber as she watched the two. Ashlyn led Ken to the break room, then gestured to one of the seats. “Can I get you a water?”

“No, no, I’m fine.”

She pulled out the chair across from him, sitting down and folding her hands. “Is… everything okay?”

He took a deep breath, crossing his arms. “I’m sorry to bother you at work. I know I shouldn’t have, but I don’t have your contact information, and this was the only way I could think to see you.”

“It’s fine,” she said quickly.

He looked at her for a second, uncomfortable. “Ali’s my only daughter, my baby. I need you to know that I love her very much.”

“I know.” Because Ashlyn did know. Even with as strained as things had been lately, she could tell that the Kriegers loved their daughter.

“I’m just… I don’t know how I’m supposed to proceed. In the past, when Ali has dated guys, I’ve taken it upon myself to have a man to man talk with them. And maybe that’s old fashioned of me, but I want them to understand that she’s something precious to me. She’s precious to so many people. And all I have ever wanted was for her to be happy. Happy and safe and loved.”

“I love her.” He looked back at her but didn’t say anything. “I do. And I want nothing more than to make her happy. It’s what she deserves.”

“I… what happened at the bakery? The night the window was broken?” Ashlyn looked at him, unsure of what to say. If Ali had said one thing, it wasn’t her place to reveal details she had chosen to keep to herself. “I know that you were there. And I know that Ali left something out.”

She swallowed thickly. “I… I had come by to bring her a tea. We’d been supposed to go out, but she had to stay… We kissed. Some high school boys saw and came in. They were being…” She let out a harsh breath. “Little pricks. And then one of them grabbed her. So I pushed him away and he punched me. Ali grabbed a knife and they ran. But then they threw the rock.”

She watched as he worked through it in his mind. “The world is already such a dangerous place. When Kyle was… out on the scene, and we didn’t know where he was, I was so scared something would happen to him. Because he’s my son and I know he’s strong, but it’s always going to be harder for gay people, more dangerous. And so… it’s not that I think it’s wrong, that she’s with you. I need you to know that. But I’m just so afraid for her.”

She took a deep breath. “I get it. It is… scary, sometimes. But we can’t let them win. We can’t choose not to be who we are, just because some people aren’t going to like it.”

“I know that. I just…” He shrugged his shoulders. “She’s always going to be my little girl. Nothing can possibly change that. And I just want to make sure she’s being taken care of.”

“I get that. And I just want you to know that I want nothing more than for her to be safe and happy.”

He stared at her for a long moment, then offered her his hand. “You’re a good one. I can tell.”

She grinned. “I’m glad you think so.”

He stood up. “I’ll let you get back to work. But,” he pulled a pen from his pocket and a napkin from the table, “here’s my number, and Deb’s, just in case you ever need to get ahold of us. I know what it’s like to be on the receiving end of Ali’s perfectionistic fits. She may or not have gotten that from my wife,” he told her conspiratorially.

She took it from him with a laugh. “I’ll be sure to hold onto this, then. And here’s mine.” Once she had written her number down, she led him back to the front.

“Sorry again for coming to your job.”

“Don’t worry about it. Stop by anytime. Who knows, maybe I’ll convince you to let me give you some art.”

He pointed at her. “Watch yourself,” he jokingly warned. He gave a wave then left the shop.

“Woah… is everything okay?” Kelley asked.

Ashlyn nodded, still feeling as if she was a little in shock herself. “Yeah. I think everything is going to be just fine.”

Chapter Text

"Ashlyn's calling you." Ali looked up from the mixer in confusion.

"What?"

"Ashlyn." Alex handed her the phone and she accepted the call.

"Hello?"

"Aliiiiiii..." she slurred into the phone, making Ali laugh.

"Hi baby. Why are you awake at 5:20 in the morning?"

"Didn't go to bed," she said, her voice just a little too loud.

"Wait you're still up? How?"

"Lots and lots of red bull. And vodka! Lotsa vodka."

"Oh my gosh... are you home now?"

"Nope! We're outside of the club. Of Notorious."

"Notorioussss!" She could hear someone who sounded suspiciously like Megan sing in the background.

"You're still in DC?!" Ali sandwiched her phone between her ear and her shoulder, freeing her hands to keep mixing.

"Yup. But we're waitin' on an Uber now."

She laughed under her breath. "Okay, can you text me when you get home so I know you're okay?"

"Wanna see you," Ali could practically see her pout through the phone.

"No babe, you need some sleep."

"No... I need to see your pretty, pretty, beautiful face."

She shook her head at Ashlyn's flattery. "I'm at work, remember?"

"I know! I'll come to you!"

Ali rolled her eyes at Alex who was looking at her with confused interest. "I really think you should get some sleep."

"Pleeeaaaasssse?"

She sighed. "Okay. Have the Uber driver bring you here. I'll have coffee waiting."

"You're the best. And the most beautiful girlfriend in the whole world. And I can't wait to see you."

A honk sounded from Ashlyn's side of the line. ""Kay our car's here. KELLEY!" Ali winced as Ash suddenly yelled into the phone. "Get in the car, bish! Alright I love you baby, I'm on my way."

"Okay, I love you, t-" Ashlyn hung up before Ali could finish and she slid her phone into her back pocket before turning to Alex. "So... there might be a carload of super hyped up drunk girls on their way to the bakery."

Alex's eyebrows shot up. "It's almost 5:30 am."

"Oh I know," Ali laughed. "But Ashlyn and the girls took Megan out last night for her bachelorette party, and from the sounds of it they shut down the club. So they're headed here because Ashlyn insists she needs to see me."

"That's sweet. A little psycho, but very sweet," Alex giggled. She pulled a face and rubbed at her stomach.

"Are you okay?"

She rolled her eyes. "I'm fine. The little one is just kicking extra hard this morning."

"Are you sure that's all it is?" Ali asked with a serious look. "If you're in labor you have to tell me, I don't want you to give birth next to the walk in."

Alex just smiled. "Trust me. If I think I'm in labor, you'll be the first to know. Plus, I still have six weeks to go. This baby's not going anywhere."

"If you say so..."

"Anyway, you should probably get the coffee pot started, it sounds like it's going to be needed much earlier than normal today."

Thirty minutes later, Ali and Alex were alerted to their arrival by several long honks from the parking lot. Ali hurried to the front, laughing at the drunken tableau waiting for her. Kelley was doing some sort of chaotic Irish jig next to the SUV, while Ashlyn was filming her with her phone. Julie had one hand on the car, one hand holding back her hair as she puked into a Taco Bell bag being held out by Heather, whose face was becoming more and more disgusted. She hurriedly unlocked he front door and pushed it open.

"You made it." Ash and Kelley immediately turned to look at her, both of them bounding forward after a split second in a race to see who could reach her first. Somehow Kelley won, and she threw her arms around Ali, spinning her around. Once she was back on solid ground, Ashlyn wrapped her in her arms. 

"Thanks for letting us come." Her cheeks were pink and she leaned into Ali hard.

"Okay, let's get everyone inside." Heather wrapped an arm around Julie and they slowly made their way forward. "Wait, where's Megan?"

Ashlyn turned back to the car. "Oh yeah. Pinoooooooe!"

The back door of the SUV was flung open, and a figure in leather pants with a pulled up hoodie spilled out. She sauntered towards the front door, following the rest of the girls in. Ali waved apologetically at the Uber driver, who looked less than impressed with all of their antics. She went inside, locking the door behind her. Her first order of business was to grab the trashcan from the bathroom, replacing Julie's Taco Bell bag.

"Okay, who needs coffee?" All of their hands flung into the air, and Ali went about filling five large paper cups. When she turned around she was met by a sight that almost made her drop them all.

"Megan... your hair!" she gasped out in horror.

The bride to be ran her hand through the newly hot pink strands. "Whatcha think?"

"It's... it's... so pink!"

"Ash did it," she grinned. 

Ali looked at her girlfriend. "You dyed her hair?"

She shrugged with a smile. "It wasn't hard."

"What if something had gone wrong? What if... oh my god, have you shown Sue?"

Megan didn't look concerned. "It turned out great! Sue's gonna loooove it."

Ali sighed and smiled. "I sure hope so." She went about passing out everyone's coffees. "You okay, Julie?"

The blonde nodded, accepting a napkin and wiping her mouth. "I wasn't even really that drunk! But then they made me get in the back and I ended up carsick."

"Well here's some water." Ashlyn pulled Ali into her lap and pressed a kiss to her cheek. "Did you guys have a good time?"

They gave a chorus of whoops, with the exception of Julie, who once again heaved over the trashcan.

"I've got some bread and butter straight out of the oven," Alex announced as she came from the back. "I figured everyone could use some food in their stomach."

She passed them out to the drunk women, all of whom offered up their thanks, ending with Kelley. 

"You're a goddess. Where have you been all my life?" she slurred with a lazy grin.

Ashlyn threw a packet of sugar at her head. "Keep it in your pants, KO, she's obviously taken."

"What? I can't even tell a woman she's beautiful? Censorship!"

Alex laughed. "Well as someone who is 8 thousand weeks pregnant, I'll take it."

"Yeah, I'll bet you can take it..." Kelley murmured with a sly grin, earning another sugar packet to the head, this time from Heather.

"Well you guys are welcome to hang out in here, but we've gotta get back to the kitchen," Ali said as she puled herself from Ashlyn's lap. She was almost to the back when a hand caught her arm. She turned around to find Ashlyn just a few inches from her.

"Hey... thanks for letting us come here. I know it's silly... but we spent all night drinking and laughing and talking about true love... and I just really wanted to see you. Because I love you so much."

Ali caressed her cheek, smiling up into her hazel eyes. "I love you too. And even though you must be exhausted and I really think you should go to bed... I'm glad you came. Because I wanted to see you, too." Ashlyn leaned down and gave her a slow, lingering kiss, earning a cheer from Kelley. "Okay. I really have to go bake now. I love you."

"I love you, too."

X

It would seem that Sue either agreed with Megan on her hair choice, or decided to just live and let live, because one week later Ali found herself sitting in a white wooden chair, waiting for Megan and Sue's wedding to begin. She had already changed out of her chef's jacket, and was wearing a maroon lace dress that she had bought with her mom a few days earlier. 

This was Ali's first time at a same sex wedding, and she found herself wondering how they would handle everything. For instance, since there wasn't a groom, no one was already at the front other than the officiant. Who would escort who in? Would Sue and Megan walk in one at a time? At the same time but from different entrances? And what about later at the reception? Would there be two father-daughter dances? Two bouquet tosses?

She had always pictured herself having a traditional wedding. Perhaps it was all the time she had spent helping her Meemaw deliver and serve cakes at ceremonies in junior high and high school, but she loved all of the traditions. She wanted her dad to walk her down the aisle. Would Ashlyn want the same thing?

Woah.

She realized the implications of what she had just thought. At what point had she started thinking less about her wedding, and more about their wedding? She felt a small flutter of panic in her chest. It was too soon, she was going to jinx everything, what in the world was she thinking?

But then the music began and the wedding party began to walk down the aisles. As soon as she saw Ashlyn, fear about their future and what that might look like flew out the window.

Because she looked so, so beautiful. 

She was wearing a perfectly tailored black suit, paired back to a white button down and a navy blue tie. Her make up was on the natural side, and her hair was perfectly coiffed. She was holding a bouquet of white roses, and when she took her place at the front, her eyes sifted through the crowd until she found Ali, he face breaking out in a wide smile. Ali gave her a small wave.

Maybe it was too early. Maybe even thinking about weddings and marriage and babies after only technically dating for about four months was a recipe for disaster, but something in her couldn't resist. Because as cautious as she tended to be, as much as she would prefer to micromanage everything in her life to guarantee the outcomes she wanted, there was something about Ashlyn that touched her soul. Something that made her want to throw caution to the wind, to jump and not think about the consequences.

She was pretty sure she wanted to spend the rest of her life with Ashlyn Harris.

Sue and Megan had seemed to float down the aisles, both of them in beautiful white silk suits (Sue of course, had paired hers with a pair of pristine white basketball shoes). The officiant had spoken at length about love and commitment, about the road ahead for them, but it was obvious to anyone watching that Sue and Megan were so deeply in love that they could handle anything life threw at them.

Later that night, as she and Ashlyn swayed gently to a Norah Jones oldie, Ali leaned her head on Ashlyn's shoulder, breathing in her scent.

"Are you okay?" Ashlyn murmured, her hand running along her lower back.

"Yeah, why?"   

"I don't know, you've just been a little quiet tonight."

She lifted her head to look into Ashlyn's eyes. "Everything is just... so beautiful. Perfectly Sue and Megan."

Ash gave her a dimpled grin. "Isn't it? It's just so... I'm so goddamn happy for Pinoe. She deserves to be happy. After everything we've been through, growing up in Satellite Beach, her getting into college, me moving to Brooklyn, both of us coming here and establishing ourselves... I'm so proud of her. I'm so glad she found someone like Sue, someone who makes her feel..." She swallowed thickly, but pressed on, "Feel the way I feel whenever I'm with you."

Ali's breath caught in her chest, her eyes not leaving Ashlyn's.

"I love you so much, you know that right?" Ashlyn whispered.

Her eyes filled with sentimental tears, and she forced herself to laugh in an effort to not let them fall. "You better. I didn't put this dress on for just anyone, y'know." But then she leaned in, bringing her lips to Ashlyn's ear. "I feel the same way about you... now that you're in my life, I can't imagine living without you by my side."

Ashlyn pulled her closer, kissing her temple, and the two continued to dance long into the night.

Chapter Text

Ashlyn hadn’t been expecting any company, so she was surprised when she heard a knock on her front door. She stood up from the couch and went to open it.

“Ali?”

Her girlfriend gave her a smirk, her nose wrinkling as she did so. “Hey there.”

“What are you doing here?”

“Man, what a greeting. Are you gonna keep me out here in the cold?”

Ashlyn gave her head a quick shake. “Shit. Come in, sorry.” She stepped back, letting Ali walk past. “Why aren’t you at… work…” She had shut the door then turned around to look at Ali, completely unprepared to see her thick winter coat on the ground, nothing covering up the lacy red lingerie set she was wearing. Her mouth was dry, and she wondered if she had perhaps died and gone to heaven without realizing it. “Wow.”

“So we’ve been training Alyssa to fill in while Alex is out on maternity leave, and today it was suggested that I head out early to let her practice on the evening orders.”

Ashlyn slowly walked forward, letting her hands encircle Ali’s waist. Her thumbs pressing into her warm skin. “So you decided to come surprise me?”

She laughed. “I mean, that was the plan. Why, do you not like it? I can put my coat back on.” She turned around, bending to reach for her coat, and Ashlyn quickly gripped her hips, pulling her back and earning a soft gasp.

“I don’t like it.” She waited until Ali had straightened up and turned back to face her. “I fucking love it.”

Before Ali could respond, she had pressed their lips together, kissing Ali hungrily. She managed to guide them towards the couch as her shirt was ripped over her head. Ali’s mouth attacked her pulse point, earning a loud groan from Ashlyn. She collapsed back onto the couch, pulling Ali to straddle her lap and meeting her lips once more.

Her phone began to buzz unexpectedly in her pocket, making both of them jump.

“Sorry, sorry…” Ashlyn fumbled with it through the material of her jeans, finally managing to decline the call. She brought her lips to Ali’s ear. “Although I have to say, I like the little gasp the vibration made you make…” she caught Ali’s earlobe in between her teeth ad pulled until she shivered against her.

“Maybe you should make me do it again,” Ali purred.

“Maybe I- ugghhh.” Her phone had begun to vibrate again. She extracted herself from Ali enough to pull it out of her pocket, glancing at the screen to see her brother’s name. “Fuckin’ Chris.” She declined the call again and set the phone down to the side, reaching for Ali once more. But before she could kiss her, her phone began to vibrate for a third time.

She sat back with a huff and grabbed her phone. “Give me one minute to see what he wants and then I’m taking you to my bed and I’m gonna take these” she playfully snapped the waistband of Ali’s underwear, “off using my teeth.”

She pressed accept. “Yeah?”

“Ashlyn.”

Ali had leaned forward, scraping her teeth across Ashlyn’s collarbones, making her want to scream. “What is it Chris, I’m a little busy-”

“It’s Grandma.”

Ashlyn quickly brought a hand to Ali’s shoulder, halting her actions. “Grandma? What do you mean?”

“She’s had this cough for a few weeks, she said it was just a cold, and she wouldn’t go to the doctor, no matter how many times we suggested it-”

“Chris! What’s wrong?”

“She practically collapsed this morning, and she told Mom she couldn’t breathe so Mom called an ambulance. She’s been diagnosed with pneumonia.” Ashlyn felt her entire world begin to spin. By this point, Ali had climbed off of her lap, grabbing a throw blanket from the armchair and wrapping it around her shoulders as she watched Ashlyn talk to her brother.

“Pneumonia… is she going to be okay?” Her was climbing in pitch and volume.

“They don’t… they think so? But she’s also had it for a few days, so it’s not good. She’s been admitted into the ICU.”

“Oh my god.” Ashlyn pushed up from the couch, a hand pulling at her hair. “I’m gonna, I’ll come down. I’ll call Earl and tell him… and then I’ll drive down.”

“Sissy that’s a long drive-”

“If you can do it so can I!” Ash took a deep breath. “I’ve gotta go, I need to make phone calls, I’ll let you know when I’m on my way.” She hung up without waiting for a reply.

She turned back to look at Ali. “My Grandma-” Her voice caught in her throat, and a few horrifying seconds later she burst into tears. Instantly Ali’s arms were around her, holding her close, pressing her face into her shoulder.

“Pneumonia?”

Ashlyn nodded her head. “She’s in the hospital. I’ve gotta, I’m gonna drive down. I’m sure she’ll be okay, but I need to see her. If I leave by two I’ll get there at about 3 am…” She started to pull away but was stopped by Ali’s hold on her shoulders.

“You’re not driving down there. We’ll fly, it’ll get us there quicker, and it’ll be safer in the long run.”

Ashlyn didn’t miss her use of we. “No Alex, you have everything happening with the bakery, you don’t have-”

“Yes I do.” She peered up into Ashlyn’s teary eyes. “You’re not going alone. Now, you call Earl and Kelley, let them know what’s happening. I’ll get the tickets. Then you can pack a bag and I’ll swing by my place and grab some stuff before we head to the airport.”

“But the bakery-”

“Alex has Alyssa. We didn’t think she would truly be on until Alex had the baby in five weeks, but she can do a test run while I’m in Florida.” She stepped forward and brought a hand to Ashlyn’s cheek. “Let me go with you. Let me be there for you.”

Ashlyn jerkily nodded her head. “Okay. Okay, yeah.” Ali pressed a quick kiss to her cheek then grabbed her purse from the end table, digging out her phone. Ashlyn looked down at her own phone, the anxiety rising in her chest once more. If something happened to her Grandma, she wasn’t sure what she would do.

X

It was nearly eight when Ali and Ashlyn came out of the Orlando airport. Chris had pulled up minutes later, getting out and wordlessly pulling his sister into a hug. When they pulled apart he gave Ali a hug as well.

The drive to Satellite Beach was quiet. Ashlyn had wanted to go straight to the hospital to see her Grandma, but Chris had assured her that the nurses had stopped visiting hours for the day but they would go first thing in the morning.

In the back of her mind, Ashlyn wondered what Ali was thinking as they drove over the bridge into Satellite Beach. She’d met Ali’s parents, seen the cars they drove; To say that the Kriegers were upper middle class was under selling it. A small part of her brain took in the low-lying beach houses as if seeing them for the first time. Her family was not upper middle class. They were lower middle class on a good day, but had resided firmly in poverty for most of her life. She shook herself from her anxieties when she realized Chris wasn’t on the street that would lead them to their house.

“Chris, no.”

“He wants to see you.”

“I don’t give a shit!”

“Ash…” he groaned.

“Where are we going?” Ali asked cautiously from the backseat.

“The bar,” the siblings answered in unison.

“Is his girlfriend going to be there?”

“Oh my god, did I not tell you that they broke up?”

Ashlyn turned to look at him full on. “No?”

“Yeah, she got into nursing school in Fort Lauderdale.”

“Surprised he didn’t sell the bar and go with her,” Ashlyn grumbled.

“Maybe he’ll go back to Mom.”

He pulled into the parking lot of a dingy dive bar and parked in the back. Ali took her hand as they began to walk to the front door and Ashlyn tried to smile, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. She was feeling distinctly uneasy about all of this; it’s not that she didn’t want Ali to get to know her family, she did, but she also knew that her family could bring out the absolute worst in her. All it took was a few comments from one of her parents and she suddenly found herself acting like a sullen teenager all over again.

Her dad didn’t see them enter immediately, but once he did, his face lit up in a smile. “Ashy!” he cried, coming around the bar with his arms spread wide. “Welcome home, honey.”

Part of her wanted to roll her eyes at the stupid nickname, but refrained from doing so. “Hey Dad.” He pulled her into a tight hug.

“How was the flight? Was there traffic getting here from the airport?”

“No, it was all fine.” She turned to gesture to Ali. “This is my girlfriend, Ali.”

He hugged her as well, obviously catching her a little off guard. “Hi sweetheart. God, you’re a pretty one, aren’t you?”

Ali gave a slightly nervous chuckle. “Oh, thank you.”

A flash of annoyance spread through Ashlyn. “Really? I would have thought she was maybe a little old for you, Dad.”

The smile seemed to slide from his face. “Oh I see. So what bullshit has your mom been spreading now?”

Ashlyn cocked an eyebrow. “Oh so you weren’t cheating on her with a middle schooler named Raylee?”

“Middle- she’s nineteen!” He spluttered. “And I’ll have you know, she’s very mature for her age.”

“Yeah... I’m sure that’s what you saw in her, Dad. Her maturity.” Sarcasm dropped from her voice.

“I don’t have to answer to you.”

“No, because that would mean taking responsibility for your actions. Anyways, I’m not here to fight with you about Raylee. I came to see Grandma, or did you forget that she’s in the hospital?” She could feel Ali squeezing her hand, but she couldn’t help herself. She was scared and upset, and it was making her lash out.

“Don’t get smart, Ashy. I was there all day.”

They stared at each other for a moment before Ashlyn softened slightly. “How is she?”

He swallowed, crossing his arms over his chest. “She’s going to be okay. You know how tough she is, God himself is going to have to pry her from this earth.”

“Yeah... yeah.”

“C’mere. She’s gonna be just fine.” He pulled her in for another hug, and this time she let herself relax into it. “We’ve all missed you down here on the island, yknow. It’s been a while.”

“I know, I... I need to be better about visiting. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize. Just drag your sorry ass down here.” He pulled back and winked at Ali. “And be sure to bring this angel with you.”

“Ooookay,” Ashlyn cut in. “How about since we’re here you hook us up with some food?”

“That I can do! You guys grab a table, I’ll grab a menu for Ali to look at.”

Dinner and drinks went by without another argument, and before Ashlyn knew it she and Ali were laying in her childhood bed, the walls around them still adorned with posters of her high school idols.

“Thank you for coming with me,” she breathed into the darkness.

Ali turned in her arms, running a thumb over her jaw. “Of course.”

“Sorry that I immediately got into it with my dad.”

“Hey, no judgements. If I remember correctly, when you met my parents, my mom and I spent the entire time poised to rip each other’s heads off.”

“Some pair we make,” Ashlyn snorted.

“A great pair.” Ali tugged her so that she was resting her head on Ali’s chest, her heart beating in her ear. She gently began to pull her fingers through Ashlyn’s short dark hair. “It’s going to be okay, babe. From the sounds of it she’s not feeling great but it’s just gonna take some time for her to come out on top. But she will. She’s gonna be fine.”

“But what if she’s not?” Ashlyn’s voice cracked. “She means so much to me... what if this is it?” The tears began to fall, soaking into Ali’s sleep shirt.

“You can’t think like that. You just have to trust the doctors to take care of her.” She pressed a kiss to the top of Ashlyn’s head. “You should try to get to sleep. The sooner you do, the sooner it’ll be morning and we can go visit.”

But sleep didn’t come easily to either of them. Instead, they both laid in the darkness, trying desperately not to think about what would happen if Ali was wrong.

Chapter Text

The hospital would only let two visitors inside at a time, so Ali found herself standing in the hallway, trying to act as if she wasn't unnerved by sterile smell and beeps that surrounded her. 

She had never seen Ashlyn this upset. Both Chris and their dad had told her over and over that her grandma would be fine, but it was as if she couldn't believe them until she saw her with her own eyes. She had tried to get Ash to eat something for breakfast, but she'd turned down all of her suggestions, saying her stomach was too nervous and that she could eat once they were done at the hospital.

Ali's phone vibrated in her pocket, and she pulled it out.

'Just checking in to say everything is going great here! Turns out Lys is a natural with macaroons, we might have to keep her on even after I'm back from maternity leave'

Alex's text was accompanied by several picture admittedly picturesque macaroons. 

'Those look great! We're at the hospital now. From what I can hear, docs say she's going to be fine, just needs to rest and let the meds work.'

"Ali?" She looked up to see Chris in the doorway. "You're wanted inside.' He started down the hall, and Ali took a deep breath before entering the ICU room.

She had seen lots of pictures of Ashlyn and her Grandma, but the woman attached to all of the machines and wires looked much smaller and more fragile. Ash was perched on the side of her bed, and she held out her hand to beckon Ali forward.

"Grandma, this is Ali. Ali, this is my Grandma."

"So we finally meet in person. I've heard all about you, y'know. This one won't shut up about you," she said conspiratorially.

Ash rolled her eyes, but a smile played on her lips. "Gran..."

"I've heard a lot about you, too," Ali said.

"Well, come here and give me a hug." Ali did as she was told, being careful not to jostle anything. "Is this your first time in Florida?"

Ali dragged one of the hard plastic chairs forward, taking a seat. "My family came a few times to go to Disney, but it's been several years since then. Not as an adult."

"Well you luckily have a world class tour guide to show you around! You girls can maybe go down to the beach, according to the weather girl on Channel 4, it's supposed to be unseasonably warm today going into tomorrow morning. You could go up to the zoo-"

"Gran, we came down to see you and spend time with you," Ashlyn cut in gently.

"And while I love you, and love spending time with you, I'm really not that great of company at the moment." She looked at Ali. "If you come back this summer, that's a whole other story. I can cook up a storm and have a grand old time." She turned back to Ash, patting her cheek. "But you can't come all the way down to Florida just to spend all of your time cooped up in a hospital room." She gave a loud, hacking cough, and Ali passed her a tissue to spit in. "Especially if I'm going to keep making a racket like that!"

"Gran..."

"Honey I'm fine. I'm under the weather, but I'm gonna be back up and at it before you can cross your eyes. And I won't have you moping around here, watching my every movement like I"m going to keel over."

"I'm not-"

"Hush, honey. Now Ali, I've seen the most beautiful pictures of your cakes. Tell me more about your bakery."

X

They had left that afternoon at her grandma's insistence, agreeing to take her car and go to the Brevard Zoo and bring her back lots of pictures to look at. They'd ended up having a nice time, Ashlyn looking considerably brighter after their trip to the hospital. They'd wandered around, their hands clasped and swinging between them. They had even had a contest to see who could do a better job impersonating the animals in the exhibits, video taping each other for evidence. They had met up with Tammye for dinner at one of Ashlyn's favorite seafood spots, eating fresh shrimp and clams until they thought they would bust. All in all, it had proved to be a nice evening, even if Ashlyn had been forced to drive her mom home after a few too many beers at dinner.

The next morning they went back to the hospital, wanting to show off their pictures and souvenirs from the zoo, but had been chased firmly out once more, admonished for not taking advantage of their vacation from Virginia’s dreary winter weather while they had the chance. That's how they found themselves at the family bar, where Mike had provided them with lunch and drinks.

"Wait, you haven't been down since I got the Dirty Oar, have you?"

Ashlyn levelled a look at him. "The what?"

"The Dirty Oar, my sailboat."

Ashlyn snorted. "No I haven't. I'd forgotten you even bought one."

"Well then we need to take it out! C'mon, finish your drinks and we'll drive down to the marina."

"No, Dad I think we were just kind of wanting a chill day, y'know? Maybe walk on the beach..."

"Why do that when you can see the beach from the boat?"

"I... ugh okay. We'll need to go by the house and change clothes."

"Okay, well let's get moving!"

Once they were back at Ashlyn's parents house, she turned to Ali. "Do you want to go out on the boat? If not, we can say I don't feel good, we can just stay here-"

"No, it's fine! I haven't been out on a boat since college. It'll be fun!"

"Are you sure?"

Ali tucked Ashlyn's hair behind her ear. "Why don't you want to go out?"

She sighed and sat on the edge of the bed, pulling Ali to stand between her legs. "I don't know. I just... my dad and I have never really gotten along. We've always butted heads, and let's face it, I'm not exactly the daughter he imagined having."

"I'm sure he doesn't feel that way."

Ashlyn shrugged. "It's fine, it's just... I don't want you to have to sit there and listen to us fight."

Ali leaned down and pressed her lips to Ashlyn's temple. "Don't worry about me. I'm going to sit back and relax, maybe work on my tan."

Ashlyn gave her a ghost of a smile. "Oh is that so?"

Ali wrinkled her nose and nodded. "Yup. I'll bring my headphones and tune you both out."

Ash caught her chin and guided her lips to her own. "If you're sure."

X

"Are you sure the weather is okay for us to be out here?" Ashlyn asked, squinting at the horizon. The Dirty Oar turned out to be a sailboat originally built in the 1970s, which Mike insisted he had restored to its previous glory. He had railed on and on about how nowadays boats all depended on technology, but not his girl. She was all manual, dependable and solid. Ashlyn hadn’t looked so impressed. For her part, Ali thought it looked stable, but then again, she didn’t know anything about sailing.

"Stop being such a scaredy cat, we're having a good time. In fact, if we go out farther, we’ll be able to see all of the island." Mike adjusted the sailboat’s navigation and pulled another can of beer out of the cooler. "Ali, do you want another drink?"

"Uh, I think I'm okay," she said looking down in her cup. "I still have some wine left." They had been out for thirty minutes, and she was already wondering if alcohol and the sea was a good mix. Her stomach was starting to feel a little unsettled, but she just focused on taking deep breaths through her nose.

"So how are things at the tattoo parlor, Ashy?"

She didn't miss tightness in her girlfriend's jaw at the nickname. "It's good. Really good. The other day actually, Earl and I were talking about him retiring and me buying the shop."

"Ash you didn't tell me that!" Ali gasped. "That's amazing news!"

"Yeah, well... there's still the issue of money. Nothing is quite set in stone yet."

"Owning your own business is nothing to jump into."

"I know."

Ali cleared her throat slightly. “I mean it, this is awesome news. You work so hard, you deserve this.”

Mike took another swig of beer. "It's a lot of work. Any time something happens, it's all on your shoulders."

Ash leaned down to mess with something on the side of the boat. "I'm not... I know, Dad. I'm not jumping into this blind. I know what goes into it."

"I'm just saying, it's a lot of long nights! There have been plenty of months where I don't see my bed until the sun has already come up."

"Yeah, well on the plus side I don't plan on fucking my teenage employees, so that'll definitely save me some time."

"Goddamn it, Ashlyn. That didn't involve you. What do you want me to say?"

"I don't know, how about sorry? Sorry for cheating on your wife of over thirty years? Sorry for being a bad dad for my entire life?"

He gaped at her, his face becoming more and more red. "I provided you with everything, how dare-"

"YOU provided? You?! Grandma did everything! While you and Mom were too busy yelling and fighting and getting plastered every night, Grandma picked up the slack! Don't try to act otherwise."

He shook his head. "You are one of the most ungrateful little bitches I've ever known-"

"Well who do you think I learned it from!"

"Woah, maybe we all need to take a breath-" Ali started, but Ashlyn cut her off.

"Admit it, you never wanted kids in the first place, you barely paid attention to us."

"I wanted to come to your basketball games, but I was always at the bar-"

"I played soccer!” Ali could hear the beginnings of tears in Ashlyn’s voice, and it made her heat ache. “I played soccer, and Chris played basketball.”

“I meant, that’s what I meant-”

A blast of ice cold wind suddenly hit the three of them, stopping the argument in it’s tracks. They all turned to the horizon, where dark clouds could now be seen.

“Shit,” Ashlyn spat. “Did you check the weather at all before you brought us out here on your goddamn death trap?”

“The sky was clear when we were coming out-”

“It’s 2020! You have a phone! This is unbelievable! No, actually, it’s completely believable. I don’t know why I would expect anything else,” Ashlyn growled as she and her dad both stalked around each other on the sailboat, pulling ropes and levers that Ali didn’t understand in the slightest.

“Can I… do you need any help?” she asked, feeling useless.

“No, you’re fine right there, sweetheart. Ashy, come pull the boom out of the way.” She stayed in her seat along the side of the boat, one hand clutching her empty cup, the other pulling her life jacket closer against the sudden chill in the air.

“Wait a minute, the tiller-”

Mike cut her off. “Come get the boom!”

Ashlyn let out a huff and came to where he was standing. “Okay, now what?”

“Just take it-“

“What does it look like I’m doing!”

“Get a decent grip and pull back harder-”

“I’m pulling back-”

“For Christ’s sake, get out of the way if you’re not gonna do it right.” But as Ashlyn moved away, her hands thrown up in frustration, the boom slipped from his fingers and a large gust of wind caught hard in the main sail.

There was nothing Ali could do but watch as the entire thing was set in motion, swinging across the deck until the boom collided hard into her head, causing everything to go black.

Chapter Text

For one horrible moment, Ashlyn could do nothing but stare in horror as the heavy boom slammed into the side of Ali’s head, knocking her backwards, off of the boat and into the cold water of the ocean. Then her body caught up to her mind and she was across the boat in an instant, diving over the side.

Ali’s lifejacket had thankfully kept her afloat, bobbing motionless at the surface of the water. Ashlyn wrapped her arms around her body, dragging her upright so that her head was above the water. She forced herself not to focus on the shockingly red blood that was pouring from the cut on her hair line, or the way her head was rolling back, completely unsupported.

“Dad!” she screamed, earning a mouth full of saltwater. His arms reached down and she did her best to try and heft Ali into his reach. His fingers scrabbled at the material of her life jacket for a moment before finally making purchase, clutching it and using all of his weight to heave her up and into the boat. Once Ali was aboard, he turned and helped Ashlyn back in.

She was beside her in a second, bringing a hand to Ali’s pulse, nearly weeping when she felt the tell-tale thrum of life beneath her fingers. “Get us to shore!” she choked out. She heard her Dad begin to rush around behind her. She tipped Ali’s head to the side, trying get rid of any water in her airway, then began mouth to mouth, desperately trying to remember everything she had been taught when she had worked as a lifeguard one summer in high school. After four hard breaths, she could feel Ali’s chest start to fill on it’s own, but she still hadn’t opened her eyes.

She spied a familiar white box underneath the seat beside her, and pulled out the first aid kit. Her hands were shaking so badly she could barely tear open the packet of gauze, but once she did, she pressed it hard to the cut on Ali’s hair, trying to stop the bleeding.

“Ali… Ali open your eyes. C’mon baby, open those eyes, lemme see you… Ali. Ali, please…” Her vision blurred with tears, but she did her best to blink them aside; Ali needed her to be calm, to take care of her until they could get help. “Please, Alex, open your eyes, talk to me…”

Ali remained still and silent, her face unnaturally pale against the blood and her dark hair.

Ash chanced a glance up and saw they were closing in on the marina. “Dad, you’ve gotta radio ahead, let them know we’re coming. We, we need an ambulance, have them call 911. She… oh my god. Have them call 911!” She heard him do as she said, but her attention stayed focused on the woman in front of her. If she woke up for even one moment, Ashlyn wanted to catch it.

There were several other boat owners waiting on the dock when they pulled into the marina. They helped her dad secure the boat and assured them that they had called 911, that they would be here any moment.

She had never been more relieved than when she heard and saw the ambulance round the corner. Within seconds, paramedics were stepping down into the boat, gingerly taking Ali’s vitals, and feeling along Ali’s body as Ashlyn sat back. Of course, they’re feeling for broken bones. Why didn’t you do that? What if her spinal cord has been injured? What if-

Strong hands lifted her upright and her dad pulled her into his arms. Her face pressed into his shoulder and the tears she had been fighting against began to fall. She let herself cry until she heard the paramedics ask for a backboard.

She turned to see them gingerly moving her onto it, preparing to lift her out of the boat. As she moved to follow them, she spotted Ali’s tote bag out of the corner of her eye, sitting exactly where her girlfriend had placed it when she got on the boat. She’ll want this, Ashlyn thought numbly as she grabbed it, she’ll want her stuff when she wakes up.

If she wakes up.

She pushed the thought violently from her mind. Ali was going to be fine. She was a warrior, if anyone could come out of this it was her.

They loaded Ali into the ambulance and Ashlyn got in with them, hearing her dad say that he would be right behind them but not bothering to reply. All of her energy was concentrated on watching for any sort of movement from Ali while answering the paramedics’ questions.

“Age?”

“She’s 29. 29 and a half, she’ll be 30 in July.”

“Any health problems? Medications?”

“No. She’s healthy, she watches what she eats, she works out regularly. She doesn’t take any medications, well she takes a multi vitamin, but other than that.”

“Is she on any birth control?”

“No, she’s not.”

The paramedic looked up at her. “So there’s a chance she could be pregnant?”

“No. There’s no chance.”

“If she’s sexually active-”

“She is, but with me. And I can’t get her pregnant. So no, no chance,” Ashlyn snapped in frustration

The ambulance lurched to a stop and the doors flung open. The paramedic began to rattle off information as Ali was transferred out to them. “29 year old female, traumatic head injury. She was knocked unconscious and fell into the water. Resuscitation performed on the seen but still unconscious. Laceration to head.”

Another doctor began to speak. “Alright, let’s get blood drawn for a pregnancy test then get her into a CT and an MRI.”

“She’s not pregnant!” Ashlyn argued, trailing behind them, her voice raw.

A nurse glanced up and saw her, slowing down and grabbing her arm as the rest of the staff sped Ali away. “We have to preform a pregnancy test on any female that needs a CT, it’s unsafe for a fetus-”

“She’s not pregnant! I promise you, it’s a waste of time, just help her!”

The nurse patted her arm sympathetically. “We’re going to do our best to help her. Follow me, I’m going to take you to the waiting room. We’ll let you know when she’s back from radiology.”

X

Grade 3 concussion.

Ashlyn admittedly didn’t know a whole lot about medicine other than what she had seen on television, but the look of grave seriousness on the emergency room doctor’s face told her it was just as bad as it sounded.

“She doesn’t have a bleed in her brain, which is amazing news. But she still hasn’t come around, so at this point it’s a waiting game. You can sit here with her, just hit the call button if she comes around, okay?”

Ashlyn dropped into he offered chair, taking one of Ali’s hands in hers. Her fingers were cold, so Ashlyn brought them to her lips, blowing warm air on them in an attempt to warm her up.

A nurse poked her head in. “Those wet clothes must be uncomfortable. Here are some extra scrubs for you to change into.” She placed them on the end of Ali’s bed and shut the door behind her. Ashlyn hadn’t even realized she was still in the clothes she’d been wearing when she dived in after Ali. She unbuckled her life jacket, pulling the rest her clothes off. As she took her jeans off she realized her phone had been in her pocket and was completely ruined.

Ali’s family, she suddenly thought. I need to call them. Since her phone was out of the question, she poked through Ali’s tote bag until she found hers.

A picture of the two of them kissing on New Year’s Eve flashed up at her, and for a moment she was sure she would be sick. Instead, she typed in Ali’s passcode and pulled up Deb’s contact, pressing call. She answered after just two rings.

“Hey sweetheart! How is Florida?”

Ash cleared her throat. “Deb it’s Ashlyn.”

“Ashlyn? Hi, is everything okay?”

Ashlyn swallowed back the tears that were wanting to fall. “Um… no. There, there’s been an accident.” She kept it together long enough to tell Deb what had happened. “She hasn’t woken up yet, and-”

“We’ll be down as soon as we can,” Deb cut in. We’ll be on the next flight and I’ll call Kyle. Just… stay there with her. When she wakes up, tell her we’re coming and that we love her. And just… take care of my little girl,” Deb’s words cut off with a sob, and Ashlyn’s heart ached. Maybe if I had taken care of her better in the first place, this wouldn’t have happened.

“I will. I will.”

“Okay. I’ll text you when we have the plane tickets.”

“Okay. Um, my phone is out of commission, so just call or text Ali’s phone.”

“Okay. And Ashlyn…”

Her breath caught in her chest. “Yes?”

“Thank you for calling. And thank you for being there.”

“Of course,” she gasped. “There’s nowhere else I could be right now.”

“I’ll text when I have more information.”

“Okay.” They hung up and Ashlyn sat down next to Ali, taking her hand again. She dropped her head to the edge of the bed. She wasn’t necessarily a praying person, but she sent up a desperate plea to anyone listening that everything would be okay.

A small groan broke the silence.

Her head whipped up to see Ali’s eyes fluttering open, her face wrinkling in pain.

“W… wha…” Her voice was gravelly and hoarse, no doubt from the saltwater she inhaled when she went overboard.

Ashlyn’s heart was in overdrive. “Wait baby, don’t move. Oh my god. Oh my god, let me call the nurse, where’s the- NURSE! NURSE! She abandoned her frantic search for the remote with the call button to yell out.

Several moments later, the door flew open and the doctor came in. “Look who rejoined us! You gave us all quite a fright, we’re happy to see you awake. I’m Dr. Conrad, can you tell me your name?” She went about shining lights in Ali’s eyes and testing her vitals as she asked questions.

“Al… Alex Krieger.”

“Great, do you know where you are?”

“Hospital.”

Dr. Conrad smiled. “Fair enough, but can you tell me what city? What state?”

Ali shook her head slightly, wincing immediately. “Virginia?” she asked questioningly.

The doctor looked at Ashlyn. “That’s where we live,” she explained.

“Okay, how about this, can you tell me who the president is?”

“George Bush.” Ali’s voice came out in a murmur, but there was no mistaking what she said.

“Uh… can you try again?”

“It’s… Bush.” Ali let her eyes flutter closed for a moment, then pried them open. “He’s… it’s his second term.”

Ashlyn sat back in her chair. This was not good. This wasn’t good at all.

“Okay, and can you just confirm your birth date for me?”

“July 28, 1990.”

“Which makes you how old?”

“Sixteen.”

Dr. Conrad gave her a small smile. “I’m just going to step out for a moment, but the nurse is going to give you something for the pain, okay?” She gestured for Ashlyn to follow her out of the room.

“From the looks of things, she’s experiencing retrograde amnesia. It’s not terribly uncommon in these types of injuries.”

“But I thought that was when you lost all of your memories?”

She nodded. “Usually, yes. To be taken back specifically to a previous point in your memory… it’s rare, but not unheard of. I’m going to give her some time to rest and relax, for the most part time is the only thing that heals a traumatic brain injury like this. Have you contacted her family?”

Ashlyn nodded. “They’ll be here as soon as they can. They’re flying in.”

She nodded. “That’s good. Seeing familiar faces can help. If they can, maybe have them bring some pictures and momentos from the time she’s lost, anything to help.”

“Dr. Conrad? Paging Dr. Conrad to room 1206.”

“I have to go, I’ll be back by when I can,” the doctor called as she stepped past Ashlyn, already setting off at a jog.

Ashlyn made her way back into Ali’s room. Her eyes were drooping shut, but she seemed to be fighting whatever medication she had been given.

“Where… where’s my mom?” she asked.

Ashlyn cleared her throat, retaking her seat beside her. “She’s on her way Ali. She and your dad are coming, and they’re reaching out to Kyle. She said to tell you that they all love you, and they’ll be here soon.”

She nodded drowsily. “’Kay.”

Ashlyn took her hand without thinking, pressing a kiss to her knuckles. “Jesus Ali, I was so worried. I was scared you would never wake up.” She looked up when Ali tugged her hand away.

“Who… who are you?”

The complete reality of the situation crashed down around Ashlyn. If Ali had mentally regressed to being in high school, she didn’t remember anything that had happened between them. She didn’t remember any of the dates they’d shared, the long talks about their future. She had no idea who Ashlyn was. The tears threatened to choke her, but she pushed them away the best she could.

“I’m your girlfriend.”

Chapter Text

The woman’s words cut through the fog of pain and medicine to reach Ali’s ears, causing her chest to seize up with panic. Her girlfriend? No. Girls like her didn’t have girlfriends. It just wasn’t allowed. She shook her head violently, only stopping when the movement made stars burst in her vision, the pain nearly making her vomit.

“No.”

“Yes, I am.”

“No, you’re not. I don’t know you.”

“Baby listen to me, you were in an accident-”

“Don’t call me that! I’m not your- I’m straight! I’m not a lesbian. I have a boyfriend.” The last part was a lie. She and her boyfriend had recently broken up, but what did that matter? She just needed to make this woman understand that she was normal.

“You… you’re not a lesbian. That’s right.”

She looked over at her suspiciously, making her eyes cooperate and take in the woman’s hazel eyes, her short cropped hair, her cheekbones. She was one of those people who seemed to perch right on the line between beautiful and handsome, and something about her made Ali’s stomach flip.

No. She couldn’t think like that.

“Why are you here?”

“You… we were out on a boat. The boom swung around and hit you. It knocked you into the water. The doctor said you’re going to be okay, but right now you’re experiencing some memory loss-”

“No, I’m not!”

“Yes, you are,” the woman sighed back. “Look… you think it’s what, 2006? 2007?”

“Because it is.”

The woman pulled what looked like an iPod touch from a bag beside the bed. She clicked the button and tapped on the screen for a moment. She handed it to Ali who squinted at the device, the bright light not helping her headache.

Today’s date: Wednesday January 29, 2020.

“No… but… what?”

“I know… I know it’s a lot to take in. But, but I just want you to know that you’re safe and loved, okay? I’m going to stay with you until your parents and Kyle get here-”

“Kyle? He’s alive?!” The last time she had seen Kyle was the night he ran away, the night everything had gone to shit. It had been months since she’d heard from him. Her heart stuttered at the thought that if this was real, if this wasn’t some elaborate dream, then Kyle was okay and part of her life again.

The woman gave a small smile. “He’s alive, sweetheart, and he’s thriving. He lives in LA, he went to cosmetology school while you were in culinary school-“

“Culinary school?”

“Yeah. You’re a baker. You run Patty Cakes with your best friend, Alex. That’s… that’s how we met.” The woman was staring hard into Ali’s face, as if begging her to remember the things she was saying as fact, but Ali was coming up empty. She felt all at once bare and vulnerable, crossing her arms across her chest.

“I’m tired,” she whispered.

“Okay. Why don’t you… why don’t you get some rest, that way when your family gets here you have more energy?”

Her eyes were already sliding shut, but she pried them open one last time. “Hey.”

“Yeah?”

“What’s your name?”

The woman released a long breath, as if she was trying to keep herself from crying. “Ashlyn. My name is Ashlyn.”

“Ashlyn…” The shape of the name was familiar in her mouth. “Thank you for staying until my parents come. That’s nice of you.”

“Oh Alex…” The woman, Ashlyn, gave her a smile, one that made a dimple pop out in her chin. “I’ll stay as long as you’ll have me.”

But Ali was already tumbling into a dreamless sleep.

X

She woke up several hours later to someone holding her hand. She pried open her eyes to see the woman from earlier asleep with her head resting on the bed next to her thigh. She was holding her hand, her finger’s warm against Ali’s. She took the moment to really take her in, all the way to the sleeve of tattoos peeking out from under the tee shirt she was wearing. She’s always wanted a tattoo, but her parents would kill her.

A nurse came in to take her temperature and it woke Ashlyn up. She blearily peered around for a moment, smiling when she saw Ali and squeezing her fingers, before her brain seemed to catch up with everything that was happening and she quickly let go of her hand, avoiding her eyes guiltily.

“Hey. You’re awake.”

“So are you.”

“Your mom called while you were napping. Their flight is supposed to land at around midnight, but she promised that she and your dad would be here first thing in the morning. Kyle’s taking a red eye, he’ll be in at about the same time.”

“I’ve missed him so much…” she whispered.

“I know,” Ashlyn said gently. “You guys talk on the phone all of the time. I met him for the first time at Thanksgiving. He’s… he’s really doing great. I promise.”

“That makes me so happy.” She cast her eyes over at Ashlyn, finally realizing she wasn’t wearing the scrubs she’d been in earlier. “You changed.”

She glanced down. “Yeah… I was just borrowing those scrubs until my brother could get here with my bags.”

“What happened to the clothes you were wearing?”

“They got wet when I jumped in after you. Completely ruined my phone,” she said, trying to make a joke.

“Sorry. Can… where’s my phone?”

“Here.” She handed her the iPod touch.

“What… no. I have a pink razr.”

Ash gave a half-hearted laugh. “I shouldn’t be surprised that 2006 Ali was a hot pink razr kind of girl. No sweetheart. This is your phone.”

She pushed the button and the screen lit up. 5:48 Wednesday, January 29. Behind the text was a picture of someone Ali vaguely recognized as herself, but a different version. Her face was thinner, she wasn’t quite as tan. Her hair was hanging in loose waves, and she was kissing Ashlyn full on the mouth. Her breath caught hard in her chest. She had to get rid of this picture, no one could know.

“Are you okay?”

She looked up to find Ashlyn staring at her, her eyebrows furrowed.

“I’m, I’m fine,” she choked out. She began to press randomly at the screen. “How do I call my mom?”

“The phone app is right here,” Ashlyn leaned over and showed her, “But she’s already boarded her flight, you won’t be able to call.”

“Oh.” Ali felt like she had so many questions, but didn’t even know where to start. “Wait… I got the president question wrong, didn’t I?”

“Hm?”

“When I first woke up. I said Bush. But… if this is really 2020, that’s wrong.”

Ashlyn nodded. “Yeah.”

“So who is it?”

Ashlyn let out a heavy sigh. “It’s… well, right now it’s Trump. Donald Trump.”

“What?” She looked at her suspiciously. “The rich guy? You’re lying.”

Her lips twisted into a rueful grin. “Oh, if only I was. Trust me, a lot of people feel how you feel, even if they aren’t dealing with amnesia.”

“I… what…”

“Are you hungry? I can tell the nurse, get you some food. Also, I think you’re being moved to a normal room later.”

“Food sounds good.”

She let her eyes shut again as Ashlyn stepped out to the nurse’s station, only opening them when she came back. She watched as she settled back into the chair beside her.

“You said I work at Patty Cakes?”

“You do more than work there; you’re in charge.”

“And that’s how we met?”

Ashlyn nodded. “Yeah, my friend was getting married, we came in to look at cakes… we actually went to the wedding this past weekend.” She stared at the wall for a moment. “That seems like a million years ago.”

“Why is taking so long for my parents to get here? Where are we?”

“Orlando.”

“Oh. Do I live here?”

“No. My grandma is sick, she’s actually in this same hospital, she has pneumonia. But we came down to see her.”

“Is she going to be okay?”

Ashlyn gave her a smile that made her feel like melting. “How is it possible that you’re in a hospital bed with a serious concussion but you’re still worried about everyone else?” She reached out, smoothing a thumb over Ali’s cheekbone as if she couldn’t help herself. “You’re one of a kind, Ali Krieger.”

The door opened, and a nurse wheeled in a tray of food, breaking whatever moment was happening. Ali swallowed thickly. You’re not gay, she reminded herself. It wouldn’t help anything to let herself get pulled into whatever fairytale the tattooed woman next to her was offering. There was no sense in hoping for something that could never be.

X

“Ali?”

She opened her eyes, her heart leaping when she saw her parents in the doorway. She’d been transferred to a regular room after eating dinner the night before, and had spent most of the time since slipping in and out of sleep. The hospital staff had provided a cot for Ashlyn to sleep in next to her, and she tried not to linger on the part of her that inexplicably had wanted to tell Ashlyn to crawl in with her instead.

“Mom? Daddy?” They hurried forward, wrapping her in hugs, and they smelled so familiar and comforting that she couldn’t stop herself from crying. Nothing had truly made sense since she had first come to, but this felt right.

“We got here as soon as we could, Alex,” her dad assured her as he wiped a thumb under her eye. She looked back and forth between the two of them, observing how they, just like her, looked the same but also different. Older, with more gray hair and wrinkles, but still the same people.

“I’m so happy to see you.”

“And what am I, chopped liver?”

She looked past her parents to see a very tall, well-muscled, heavily tattooed man standing in the doorway with a bouquet of flowers.

“Wha… Kyle?” she squeaked out, and he gave a wide smile.

“That’s me, gorgeous.”

She reached out her arms and he came closer, giving her a tight hug. “Oh my god. You’re… you’re here! You’re alive! And you… you look so damn good!” She looked guiltily at her mom for a moment. “Sorry.”

“For what?”

“For… cussing.”

Everyone else in the room began to laugh. “Oh honey,” Deb said finally, “You’re twenty-nine. You can cuss, it’s okay.”

“You really do, Kyle, you look incredible.” She ran her fingers over the tattoos spanning his right arm. “And these!” She glanced up at her parents. “Can you believe that he has tattoos now?”

Everyone began to laugh again. “Oh honey, have I got news for you: you have ink of your own.”

“What?!” She glanced around incredulously. “Where?”

“Well you have a quote right here,” Kyle pressed a hand to her side through her hospital gown. “But there’s no way to look at it without all of us getting an eyeful,” he teased. “And then your other is right here, your IV is covering it up.” She peeled away the bandage covering her IV and sure enough, black script decorated her skin, proclaiming the word ‘liebe.’

“I can’t believe I have two tattoos,” she said.

“Well the little one is new, you got it in… When did you do it, Ash?”

Part of Ali had forgotten there was another person in the room until Kyle asked her. Ashlyn cleared her throat. “Um… September, I want to say?”

“You did it?” Ali asked.

“Well duh, Buttercup. Having a super-hot tattoo artist for a girlfriend is bound to have some benefits.”

The blood drained from Ali’s face and she chanced a glance at both of her parents. “I’m not… she’s not my girlfriend.”

She saw Kyle glance at Ashlyn, who was suddenly very interested in her own fingernails. “Um… why do you say that?”

“Because I’m not… she… I’m…” She felt like she was going to throw up. “I’m not gay!”

“Ali, sweetheart, listen to me.” Her mom perched on the edge of the bed, taking her hand in hers. “We… we know, okay? You already came out to us. It’s okay.”

“No! I, I can date men.”

“Yes, and you have, but you can also date women, which you have. You are.” Kyle gestured to Ashlyn. “You and Ash have been dating for months.”

Terrified tears began to stream from Ali’s eyes. She could hear what her family was saying, and she wanted to believe them, but something was stopping her. She couldn’t get there. “I don’t understand! What is happening? What is going on? No one seems like themselves, and I don’t… I don’t understand!”

“I’m going to step out,” She heard Ashlyn say quietly as her mom pulled her into a hug, letting her cry into her shoulder. “I’m gonna head up to the ICU to see my grandma.” Ali looked up in time to see Ashlyn hug Kyle then shake her dad’s hand. She gave Ali a small, sad smile. “I’ll be back later, okay? I love you.”

Something in Ali started to say it back, but she caught herself at the last second, biting her tongue. She tried to quiet the pain that spasmed in her chest at the look of sadness in Ashlyn’s eyes, but didn’t succeed.

She buried her head in her mom’s shoulder again, half of her hoping that the next time she opened her eyes this would all turn out to be a dream, the other half scared of the very same thing.

Chapter Text

Ashlyn felt like she had lived through some pretty dark times. High school had been rough for her, spending more time getting into trouble than focusing on her schoolwork. She’d experienced several heartbreaks, one of which catapulted her into such a catastrophic tailspin that she’d landed in jail with a DUI. She had by no means had a soft, easy life.

But nothing could have prepared her for looking into Ali’s eyes and not seeing any recognition reflected back.

Her grandma had been released from the hospital later that day, and Ashlyn had helped Chris get her settled at the house, trying not dwell on the fact that the woman she so desperately loved was back at the hospital, confused and scared, insisting that she had no feelings for Ashlyn at all.

God it hurt. It felt like a fucking knife to the chest every time Ali had insisted, first to her and then to her family, that she was completely straight. Ashlyn wasn’t dumb, she knew that Ali had always struggled with feelings of internalized homophobia but seeing her transported back to her teenage mindset made her realize just how much pain Ali’s sexuality had once caused her.

She just wanted to Ali feel better, but she didn’t know how.

When Ali was released from the hospital the next day, Ken had purchased Ashlyn a ticket back to Virginia as well. She had tried to refuse, saying that she could get her own, that they should have this time as a family, but he had simply rested a hand on her shoulder and told her that she was part of the family now too.

Ali had taken a middle seat between her parents, with Ashlyn and Kyle opting to grab two seats a few rows back. As they ascended into the air, he had taken her hand.

“She’s going to remember. It’s just a matter of time. She’s already regaining bits and pieces.”

“But how long will it take? And I don’t… I don’t want to upset her with being around her before she does. I don’t want to… force her into anything.”

“You won’t, Ash. And as for how long… I’m not sure, honestly. It seems like the happy memories are coming back first. I mean, she hasn’t remembered me going to rehab or any of the shit that went with that. I’m no doctor, but I can only imagine that her brain is blocking out the painful stuff more than the rest.”

“But what about me is painful?” Ash gasped. “I mean… I know we had some problems, we’ve had our share of fights, but I’ve done everything I can to love her and care for her.” She wiped at the tears rolling down her cheeks and Kyle squeezed her free hand.

“I know you have. And she loves you, Ash. I know that, you know that… and I think on some level she knows that too, and that’s why she’s so shut down. High school Ali was great at three things: school, track, and living up to people’s expectations. And so she would ignore anything that went against that. It’s just… gonna take some time.”

“I know. And I’m not trying to rush her.”

“I know you’re not. But I also know that this is hard for you.”

She glanced up, seeing the very top of Ali’s bun above her seat. “What if she never remembers me?” she whispered.

“She will.”

“She might not.” She let out a breath. “The doctors said everything should come back, but they didn’t make any guarantees.”

“If she doesn’t… then she’ll just have to get to know you all over again.” Ashlyn nodded, unable to speak around the mess of tears caught in her throat.

X

Back in Alexandria, Ashlyn tried to find some sense of normalcy. She went back to work at the tattoo parlor even though both Earl and Kelley had urged her to take as much time off as she needed. But what they didn’t understand was that for the most part her spare time was spent pacing around her house, convincing herself to give Ali time, to not crowd her, to be patient.

Patience had never been her strong suit.

A week after they’d returned home, she swung by the bakery on a Sunday morning. She knew from Alex that Ali had gone into work the last few days, and she wanted to see how she was doing. She stepped into the bakery, shoulders hunched against the chilly February air.

“Hey Ashlyn, how are you?”

She smiled at Christen. “I’m doing okay, how are you?”

“Same as usual. Here to see Ali?”

She nodded, stepping closer and lowering her voice. “How is she doing?”

Christen offered a shrug. “She’s doing okay, I think. Alex has been talking nonstop about their culinary school days, and I think that’s helping. She seems to be piecing stuff together.”

“That’s good.”

“You can head back if you want.” Ashlyn nodded but didn’t move. “How are you doing?”

She shrugged. “I’m fine,” she replied, an edge of annoyance cutting through her voice. “I mean, I’m not the one who got knocked off a boat.”

“I know. And somehow I think that’s worse for you.”

She couldn’t meet Christen’s eyes. Instead she stepped around the counter and made her way into the kitchen.

“Ashlyn!” Alex cried out, waddling towards her before pulling her into a hug. “How are you?”

“I’m fine, how are you? How’s the little one?” She rested a hand on Alex’s round stomach.

“Not so little. Or at least, making me feel not so little.” Alex rolled her eyes. “I feel like a beached whale.”

“You look beautiful as ever,” Ash assured her.

“Y’hear that, Ali? Your woman is making a move on me! You better be keeping a tight leash on her,” Alex called out in a teasing voice. Ashlyn raised her eyes to finally look at Ali, who was leaning against one of the counters, her arms crossed. She gave Ashlyn a shy smile.

“Hi.”

“Hi.” Ashlyn swallowed thickly, hating this intense awkwardness. “Back in the kitchen?”

“Yup. Third day in a row.”

Ashlyn couldn’t help but furrow her eyebrows. “Are you sure you shouldn’t be taking it easy? You should be resting-”

“You sound like my mom,” Ali said with a roll of her eyes. “The doctors said I could come back as long as I agreed to have a nurse come and check in with me a few times a day. Plus… it’s nice being here. It feels normal. And it’s helping with my memory.”

“Not to mention that we need the extra set of hands since Alex is having a hard time reaching around her stomach,” said a tall woman that Ashlyn didn’t recognize. “I’m Alyssa,” she added, offering her hand.

“I’ve heard a lot about you, I’m Ashlyn.”

“Oh, I’ve heard a lot about you too. Or at least I did, before…” she trailed off, everyone seeming uncomfortable at the elephant in the room. “Anyways. I’m going to ice the eclairs.” She turned back to the counter and got back to work.

“What are you up to today?” Ali asked.

“Not much. I don’t have to go into the shop until this afternoon, I just thought I would swing by. Is… is that okay?”

“Yeah,” Ali said quietly.

“Cool. So…” She hated that everything was so awkward now. “Any big orders?”

“Not really. I mean, the days leading up to Valentine’s Day will probably be pretty busy, so we’re preparing for that.”

“Got it, got it.”

Christen stuck her head into the kitchen. “Ali? The nurse is here.”

“Alright.” Ash followed Ali to the front.

A woman in dark blue scrubs was waiting next to one of the tables, her brown hair in a sloppy ponytail. “Good morning,” she grinned. “How are we feeling today?”

“Feeling okay,” Ali answered. “Ashlyn this is Tobin, she’s the one checking in on me. Tobin this is Ashlyn, she’s…” her voice trailed off and Ashlyn’s heart lurched.

“It’s nice to meet you,” she cut in. She shook Tobin’s hand.

“Likewise.”

Tobin sat Ali down in one of the chairs and began doing a checkup, testing everything from her pupils to her blood pressure. “Alright Ali, everything is looking good. No headaches or dizziness?”

“Not really.”

“What does not really mean?”

“I get a headache if I spend too much time looking at my phone or a computer screen,” Ali admitted.

“That’s not necessarily cause for concern, just try to limit the amount of time you’re spending with screens until you’re feeling back to tip top shape, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Unless you have any questions, I’m gonna head out. I’ll come by your apartment around five.”

“Sounds good.” Ali stood up and they watched Tobin pack up her things.

“Do you want a coffee for the road?” Christen asked suddenly. “Or, I don’t know, a muffin?”

Tobin gave her a small smile. “I never say no to coffee.”

Christen grinned. “Let me grab you some.”

Ashlyn gently laid a hand on Ali’s shoulder, getting her attention. “I’m probably going to head out, let you get back to work. I just wanted to stop in and check up on you.”

“Oh okay.” Was Ashlyn imagining the flash of disappointment that crossed Ali’s face?

“If um… if you need anything or if you wanna hang out, you can just shoot me a text,” Ashlyn suggested hopefully. “I mean, I know you have your parents and Kyle is still here, but… I’m here too, if you need me.”

Ali gave her a soft smile. “Alright.”

“Alright. I’ll see you later. Bye, Ali.” She stopped herself from telling her that she loved her.

“Bye, Ashlyn.”

X

A few days later she received a text from Ali.

‘Hey so my mom has some chamber of commerce thing tonight, and I’m still not really feeling up to driving. Would it be too much to ask for a ride to my apartment?’

Her heart jumped in her chest and she was looking for her keys before she even realized what she was doing.

‘Yeah! That’s no problem at all. I’ll be there in fifteen!’

‘Ok :)’

When Ali slid into the passenger seat of her jeep, Ashlyn had to physically check herself from leaning over for a kiss.

“Hey, how was today?”

“It was good,” Ali replied as she fastened her seat belt. “Busy, but in a good way. I got to feel the baby move, which was nice. Oh and a woman named Becky came in. She said she heads the running group I go to. She said that they missed me and that they were excited to have me back as soon as I was cleared by a doctor.”

“That’s great, babe.” She winced at the pet name, afraid of making Ali uncomfortable.

“Do you need my address?”

She glanced over at her. “Uh… no. I know where you live.”

Ali wrinkled her nose in embarrassment for a second. “Oh. Right. I… keep forgetting that just because I don’t know these things, doesn’t mean everyone else has forgotten.” She glanced down at her hands in her lap.

“It’s okay. I can only imagine how… how incredibly difficult this has all been for you.”

“For you too.”

Ashlyn forced herself to shrug. “I’m doing okay. I’m mainly just worried about you.” She pulled into the parking lot of Ali’s apartment complex. “Here we are. Need me to carry your bag?”

“No, it’s not that heavy.” The two walked to her apartment door in silence, only stopping to inspect the fed ex package on her step.

“Hm… I wonder what this is.” She leaned over to pick it up, giving it a soft shake. “Nothing heavy or breakable.”

“Well hopefully not since you immediately shook it,” Ash teased. Ali handed her the box and let them inside, Ashlyn trailing her into the living room. “Are you going to open it?”

“Yeah.” Ali took it from her and grabbed a pair of scissors from the kitchen, carefully slicing the packaging tape and reaching inside.

Neither of them were expecting her to pull out a frilly, pink negligee in one hand, a matching thong in the other.  Ashlyn watched as Ali’s face paled then flushed a deep red. “I don’t… uh….” She glanced quickly at Ash, who tried to force her face into a neutral expression, as if her mind wasn’t picturing exactly how breathtaking Ali would look in the set, and how sexy she had looked in the red lingerie set she had surprised her with, how that had been the last time the two had tried to be intimate, how much she missed the feel of Ali’s skin against hers-

“Well there you go,” she finally said.

“I’m… oh god.”

“It must have been for… Valentine’s Day,” Ashlyn supplied unhelpfully, bringing her hand to scratch at the back of her neck. “I’m sure you can… return it. If you want.”

“I guess, yeah.” Ali was still staring at the lingerie clutched in her hand, her body tense. “I uh, it’s been a long day. I think I should… I should rest.”

“Of course. Do… do you want me to go grab you something to eat? Because I can.”

“No. No, I just need to be alone. I don’t think I can… I just need to be alone.” Her voice was quickly growing more panicked.

“Okay, okay, no worries. It was just a suggestion,” Ashlyn assured her in what she hoped was a calming voice.

“You should go.”

“Alright. Just uh… if you need me, you know… know how to get in touch.” She let herself out of the apartment, forcing herself not to fall apart until she was safe inside of her jeep. As soon as the door shut, the tears began to fall, choking her until she could hardly breathe.

This was so fucking unfair. What had they possibly done to deserve this entire ordeal? All she had wanted was to take care of her girlfriend, the woman she loved, the woman she wanted to marry and start a family with. But now the very idea of being physical with her was enough to drive Ali to panic.

Her phone buzzed, and she fished it out of her pocket.

‘I’m so sorry Ashlyn. This is just a lot. I don’t know how to do this. I’m sorry.’

Her tears increased tenfold. Now that she had experienced life with Ali in it, she didn’t know how she would possibly manage to live without her.

She didn’t know if she would survive.

Chapter Text

Every day seemed to contain a new challenge, a new mountain to climb, some other battle that Ali didn’t feel prepared to face. The biggest of course was Ashlyn; after the lingerie incident she had been avoiding her. She had been ill-equipped for the swoop of arousal that had rushed her body when she had realized what she was holding, and her lips had tingled with the distant memory of practicing kissing on her best friend, how sweet she had smelled. But when she’d glanced at Ashlyn and seen that same longing and want reflected in her eyes, she had panicked.

The bakery was also a struggle. She’d had to relearn all of her employees’ names, even Alex who had proclaimed that she was her best friend. She’d been a trooper, continuing to come into the bakery even though she was literal days from giving birth, all so that Ali wouldn’t be left to man a business she had no memory of taking over. Everyone seemed to be pulling double duty: Alyssa had been working tirelessly to cover what Ali and Alex couldn’t do in the bakery, Christen had been helping her make the front of house schedule since Ali kept getting everyone’s names mixed up, not to mention their availabilities, Mal and Rose had made it their personal mission to cheer her up when she just wanted to give up and cry. Kyle had finally gone back to LA, but only after she had assured him that she would be okay. Her mom had been spending the night at her apartment, just in case she woke up in the middle of the night confused and disoriented.

Slowly her life was coming together. Every now and then a memory would resurface, sometimes hazy and confusing, sometimes so crystal clear that it hit her like a punch in the chest. The first time she had stopped in the middle of the kitchen with a loud gasp, Alex and Alyssa had been by her side in an instant.

“What’s wrong? Does your head hurt?” Alex asked, her voice already verging on hysterical.

“Maybe you should sit down,” Alyssa suggested quietly.

“San Francisco, for Halloween… ghosts. We went on a ghost tour, but it was also a bar crawl… and we were in a pub and a guy in a mask popped out. You hit him!” She stared at Alex, a flurry of emotions hitting her all at once. “You slapped him, and we kept apologizing, and he said that the only apology he would accept was your phone number!”

Alex’s smile was growing bigger and bigger. “And when I told him I was engaged he asked for yours-”

“-and when I gave it to him, he called me so I would have his, and you grabbed my phone out of my hand, answered it, and said I wasn’t interested but thanks for calling!” Alex threw her arms around Ali and the two squealed at the unbridled joy of the moment. When Alex pulled back, she wiped under her eyes.

“We had so much fun in culinary school.”

“I know. I mean… I don’t know, but I do. I can feel it in here.” Ali put her hand over her heart.

“It’s all going to come back,” Alex whispered.

Ali just nodded and let Alex pull her back into a hug. That’s all she could hope for.

X

Tobin had just finished giving Ali a checkup. She no longer needed twice a day visits, but it felt good to have someone checking up on her, making sure that her head was healing properly. She walked back to the kitchen but was stopped by Alex who was peering through the window in the door.

“Look!”

Ali leaned over to do as she was told. All she could see was Tobin standing at the counter as Christen filled a cup with coffee. “What?”

“Just watch.” Christen handed the nurse her coffee, but when Tobin tried to give her a debit card, Christen waved her off. The two stood awkwardly in front of each other, Christen wringing her hands, Tobin scratching at the back of her neck with a small smile. “They’ve got it bad.”

“What? No.”

“Are you kidding me? I can count on one hand the amount of people Chris regularly gives free coffee to, and Tobin could just as easily do your checkups at your apartment.”

“This is probably just… more convenient.”

Alex rolled her eyes. “Please. They’re pining after each other like puppies.”

“If you say so.”

“I know so,” Alex replied, sticking out her tongue before heading back to the counter. Ali stayed, watching as Tobin finally left. She walked to the front counter.

“Was that Tobin leaving?” she asked.

“Oh, um, yeah. Yeah it was.” Christen’s cheeks went pink.

“It’s… nice of her to come here to check on me.”

“It is, isn’t it?” Ali tilted her head to the side, staring at Christen, but was stopped from pressing her for details by the door opening. “Welcome to Pattycakes!”

Ali watched as a woman with shocking pink hair made her way into the bakery. “Hey!” She smiled at Ali, the same smile that Ali had come to recognize as someone knowing her but knowing that she didn’t know them. “How are you?”

“I’m okay,” Ali answered truthfully. “I’m sorry, I don’t-”

“Sorry, I’m Megan, Megan Rapinoe.” She stuck out her hand and Ali took it, studying her carefully. Without warning, the word groom swam to the front of her mind. She gave a small, nervous chuckle. “Is something funny?” Megan asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Um… I’m sorry, just, the only word I can think of is groom?” Ali offered apologetically. She was relieved when Megan broke out in a wide grin.

“Ah. How fitting that that’s the one thing your brain would hold onto,” she snorted. “You made the cake for my wife and I’s wedding. It was… a misunderstanding, I guess you could say.”

“Oh.” Ali gave another nervous laugh. “There you go.”

“It was beautiful cake. Fitting for our beautiful wedding. It’s a shame you lost your memory, because it was a kick ass ceremony,” she teased.

Ali began to piece things together. “Wait… if I was there… you’re Ashlyn’s friend. She came in with you, that’s how we met. I was at your wedding.” Megan nodded at her in confirmation. “I see.”

“She said you’ve slowly been remembering some things?”

Ali nodded, coming around the end of the counter to stand closer to the other woman, not missing Christen slipping into the back. “Little things, here and there.” She chanced a glance at Megan. “I still don’t remember Ashlyn.”

“Yeah… I’d gathered as much.”

“Everyone… everyone tells me that I love her. That she loves me. That we had something that was beautiful and strong and precious. But I’ve lost it all. It’s not that… I wish I could remember if that’s the case.” She kept her eyes on her shoes.

Megan gave her a sad smile. “You shouldn’t feel guilty. It’s not as if you asked for this.”

“Neither did she.”

“No,” Megan mused. “But… it’s like everyone has been saying: she loves you. Let me tell you, I have known that girl for most of our lives and have seen her moon over lots of girls over the years. But what she feels for you, what you guys share? She’s never shared anything like it with anyone else. And… granted I don’t know a ton of your dating history, but if I had to guess, you haven’t either. Because when you guys looked at each other, it was obvious that you guys shared something that only comes along once in a lifetime.”

“I wish… I wish I could remember,” Ali mumbled, fighting the urge to scream in frustration.

“It’s okay that you don’t right now.” Megan placed a hand on her arm. “I’m serious, Ali… She’ll wait for you. You don’t have to worry about her getting tired and giving up. That’s just not who she is. She’ll stick by you while you get everything figured out because… well because that’s just the type of person she is. That’s how strong your bond is. And if… Well, if you decide you need her to take a step back and leave you alone so you can sift through all of this, she’ll do that to. She just wants to do whatever is best for you.”

Ali stared at her blurry reflection in the glass of the pastry glass. She’ll wait for you. She let the words echo around in her head.

“Ali?” Megan asked. “Are you okay?”

“Can you give me her address?” Ali asked. “I… I want to see her, I’ll have my mom drive me over when she comes to pick me up-”

“Uh, or I could take you.” Ali looked at her and she raised her hands. “I mean, if you want.”

“You would drive me over there?”

“Yeah, I don’t mind.”

“Okay.” Ali stared at Megan for a moment trying to decide if this is what she really wanted. “Okay, let’s go.”

X

She found herself in front of a cute little house with several trees in the front yard. She knocked on the front door, tapping her foot nervously as she waited for Ashlyn to answer the door.

When she did, her eyes widened in surprise. “Ali? How did you-” She looked past her to where Megan was pulling away. “Pinoe?”

“Can I come in?”

“Uh, yeah, sure.” She stepped back and let her in. Ali took a deep breath, the scent of Ashlyn’s home hitting her square in the chest. “Did Pinoe drive you over here?”

She turned to look at her, not missing the way Ashlyn had her hands shoved into the front pockets of her jeans. “Yeah. She… she came into the bakery, and I asked her to bring me over. I hope that’s okay.”

“Of course! Is, is everything alright?” Ali let her eyes play over Ash’s face, not missing now tense her jaw was, as if she was physically steeling herself against whatever had brought Ali to her home. She tore her eyes away, forcing herself to take a deep breath and start talking.

“I don’t remember Obama being president. I’ve lost all memory of three entire presidential elections. I don’t remember Heath Ledger dying. There’s a girl named Adele, and she’s amazing, and I’m getting to listen to all of her music for the first time, and I’m obsessed. Both of the British Princes got married, and Kyle says I stayed up all night to watch the footage when they happened. Oh, and apparently Kim from Keeping up with the Kardashians got married, then got divorced a few months later, and now she’s married to Kanye West and they have kids and the entire world is obsessed? What is that even about?”

Ashlyn gave a shaky laugh. “Um, yeah, yeah all of those things happened.”

Ali turned to fully face her. “I’ve been googling like crazy, just trying to catch up on everything that I’ve lost, all of these pop culture references that people make without thinking. But it’s not just the dumb, trivial things that are gone. I don’t remember graduating from college or culinary school. I don’t remember getting to welcome Kyle home from rehab or celebrating every year since that he’s remained sober. I don’t remember being a bridesmaid at Alex’s wedding. I didn’t even remember that she was pregnant. I don’t… I don’t remember my first real relationship with another woman.” It was getting harder to maintain eye contact with Ashlyn, but she forced herself not to lose her nerve when she was so close. “I don’t remember what I was doing when I found out gay marriage was legalized, and I don’t know what I was feeling, but I can only imagine that I felt an overwhelming sense of joy and relief, relief that someday-” Tears were threatening to choke her, but she swallowed against them. “-that someday if I found someone who looks at me the way my dad looks at my mom, the way… the way you look at me, I would have the right to marry them, man or woman.”

She stopped for a moment, wiping beneath her eyes. “I’m sorry, Ashlyn. I still don’t remember us meeting. I have no clue what we did on our first date, or when our first kiss was, or any of the other moments we’ve shared together.”

“It’s okay,” Ashlyn breathed, her voice rough with tears. “I understand, and I’m not trying to rush-”

“Let me finish,” Ali gasped. “I don’t remember any of it. But it’s not because I don’t want to. I know that… that when I first had my accident that I said a lot of things out of panic and fear, but I… I…” The tears overwhelmed her, and Ashlyn pulled her into a hug, cradling Ali’s head into her shoulder.

“It’s okay, baby.” Ash’s body tensed up and she cleared her throat. “I mean, Ali. Not… I’m sorry, I didn’t-”

Ali pulled back and stared up into Ashlyn’s hazel eyes, bringing one hand up to cup her cheek. “Don’t apologize. Not to me.”

“I just don’t want… The last thing I want is for you to feel like you owe me something. Because you don’t, and I promise, I will wait-”

“I don’t want to wait,” Ali breathed, then stretched up and caught Ashlyn’s lips in a kiss. For a moment, Ashlyn remained motionless, frozen in shock, but then she began to kiss back, her arms wrapping around Ali’s waist, pulling her nearer.

Something erupted in Ali’s chest. It was sunshine, and a thunderstorm, and a thousand paper valentines, and the first bite of an apple pie made from scratch. It was something akin to the ocean crashing onto the shore: somehow feeling both everyday and common place, while being miraculous and grand and a dream come true. She pulled back from Ashlyn with a shaky gasp.

“Are you okay? What’s-” But Ali brought a finger to Ashlyn’s lips cutting her off with a quiet sob.

“I’m fine. I’m perfect, I’m…” She took her finger away so that she could press a hand to Ashlyn’s chest, feeling the steady thrum of her heartbeat. She grabbed Ashlyn’s hand and urged it to her own chest. “You’re… home, Ashlyn. This right here, being in your arms, this is home. I don’t remember how I found you, but I know I can’t lose you.”

Ashlyn gave a teary laugh. “Ali…” Ali gave her another quick kiss before pulling back again.

“This is where I belong, here with you. Because you’re it for me. Your heart is home.”

Then she let Ashlyn pull her in for another kiss, all other words being unnecessary.

Chapter Text

Most people would assume the worst part of being a baker is having to wake up hours before dawn, but they would be wrong. When you’re regularly up at 4:00 in the morning, you get to experience the world in a different way. How can anyone think they truly know the world they live in until they’ve seen it slowly shake itself awake under the pink light of the rising sun?

Ali didn’t actually need to be awake this early; her alarm was set to go off at eight thirty. But four o’clock had come along and she had found herself wide awake, staring up at the ceiling, unable to fall back asleep. She’d tried everything, from deep breathing and meditation to counting backwards from five hundred. But at five thirty she was still awake in her childhood bed that she was sharing with Kyle, and she eventually got up before she risked waking him up with her restless tossing and turning.

She wrapped a throw blanket around her shoulders and crept downstairs, not wanting to wake anyone up. All of her extended family had trickled in over the past few days, and every bed and couch of her parents’ house was currently occupied. She tiptoed past where a cousin was snoring in the living room before slipping into the kitchen.

She silently started up the coffee pot, leaning against the counter as she waited for it to brew. There were so many things that needed to be done, last minute details that her mom and Alex had assured her they would take care of, but she still couldn’t stop the small, wriggling anxiety that something was going to be forgotten.

Her stomach gave a quiet growl and she glanced around the kitchen. If this was a normal day she would have went ahead and pulled out some pots and pans, went about baking something for breakfast, some sort of croissants or maybe just a loaf of bread. But this was not a normal day. This was one of the most important days of her life and besides that, she didn’t want to chance waking anyone up.

Instead she grabbed a banana from the basket on the counter and retrieved her coffee, creeping through the side door so that she could sit out on her parents’ deck. She shivered as she settled onto the lounger, pulling the blanket tighter around her. This probably wasn’t the best idea, the last thing she needed was to catch a cold from sitting outside in the middle of winter-

“Shouldn’t you be in bed?”

Ali jumped, spilling some of her coffee on her in the process. “What, what are you doing here? We’re not supposed to see each other!”

A figure stepped a little closer, just barely visible in the pale moonlight. “Well, to be completely fair, I didn’t think I would risk running into you outside of your parents’ house at…” She checked her phone. “Ten till six in the morning. But seriously, what are you doing out here? Shouldn’t you be maxing out on your beauty sleep?”

Ali lifted an eyebrow even though she was certain she could barely see her. “Are you saying I need it?”

“No, no that’s not what I’m saying at all,” she quickly backpedaled, and Ali couldn’t help but giggle.

“I couldn’t sleep. But more importantly Ash, why are you doing here? Shouldn’t you also be in bed?”

“Couldn’t sleep? Not having second thoughts, are you?” It was meant as a joke, but Ali could hear the ghost of nervousness shaking her voice.

“Not at all, just still running on bakery time. What about you?”

“Couldn’t sleep either. Too excited. I brought over some donuts, I thought they would be a nice surprise to wake up to, that way you guys aren’t scurrying around trying to make sure everyone gets something to eat.”

“Aw, you’re too sweet to me.”

“Too sweet? I’m a completely right amount of sweet, thank you very much!” Ashlyn scoffed. Ali giggled and watched as she stepped closer, taking the lounger next to her.

“Can you believe that today is the day?”

“No, I can’t.” Ashlyn took a deep breath. “You would think that after waiting all this time I wouldn’t be so surprised for the day to arrive.”

“I know.” Ali took a sip of coffee. “It’s going to be great, though. I can feel it.”

“I know,” Ashlyn agreed, taking Ali’s hand before giving a low whistle. “I don’t know how you could possibly feel anything with those icy cold fingers! You should probably go inside, I’d hate for you to have the sniffles when we get to St Maarten.”

Ali stood and followed Ashlyn inside but couldn’t help but tease her. “What? Are you saying you won’t want to seal the deal if I’m all stuffed up and sneezy?”

Ashlyn placed the donuts on the kitchen table then turned to wrap Ali up in her arms. “Baby I will take you, sneezes and snot and anything else. In sickness and in health, remember?” She leaned down to press her nose into the warmth of Ali’s neck. “But I think we both know that we sealed the deal a loooong time ago,” she teased.

“Good morning to you too, Ashlyn.” They both jumped as the soft voice, pulling away to look at Ken as both of their faces flushed. He simply raised his eyebrows, giving them both a smile.

“Hey there Ken. Did not… see you. Obviously,” Ashlyn laughed.

“Isn’t this breaking some sort of rule? I thought you weren’t supposed to see the bride until the wedding.”

“What’s the matter, you think I’m gonna change my mind and give her back to you?” she teased, earning an elbow from Ali.

“Not at all… especially since you’ve already sealed the deal.” Both women flushed beet red, avoiding looking at each other or him as he took another sip of coffee.

“Ash brought us donuts,” Ali finally murmured.

“Don’t mind if I do.” He fished out a chocolate iced with sprinkles and placed it on a napkin, then turned and pulled Ashlyn into a hug. “Thanks for breakfast, and all of the other sweet things you do for my girl.” He pulled back. “But seriously, you’d better hit the road before Deb comes down, the woman lives and dies by traditions when it comes to weddings.”

“Okay, okay…” Ashlyn leaned over and gave Ali a soft peck on the lips. “I’ll see you this evening, yeah?”

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world. I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

“I love you three, now get out of my house, Harris.”

Ashlyn rolled her eyes at Ken. “Alright! I’m going.” She gave Ali a final kiss then ducked out the door.

Ken put an arm around Ali’s shoulders, pulling her in and tucking her head beneath his chin. “How’re you feeling this morning?”

She let out a slightly shaky breath. “Good! Good… nervous. I’m not sure why, though,” she laughed. “I’ve never been more sure of something in my whole life.”

He chuckled. “I think that’s just par for the course. You’re about to do something big and wonderful and a little bit scary. Only a fool wouldn’t be nervous.”

“I wish I didn’t have to wait twelve hours for it to happen.”

“Oh trust me. It’s going to pass by in a blink. And the next thing you’ll know, it’ll be six fifteen in the morning and your little girl will be getting married to the person of her dreams.”

She leaned further into his chest. “I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with her.”

He smiled, kissing the top of her head. “It all starts today.”

X

“Alright, if we can get everyone lined up, it’s nearly time!” Butterflies fluttered through her stomach, and Ali couldn’t help but give a little shiver. She turned back to the mirror one last time, her eyes sweeping over her makeup and hair. Kyle had done an incredible job, as always, making her feel just like a princess. He leaned down, putting his face next to hers in her reflection.

“You heard the woman, cupcake, it’s time!” They shared a smile. “You ready?”

“I was born ready.”

He laughed and rolled his eyes. “Just be glad it’s your wedding day so I’m going to be nice and not prove just how wrong that statement was.” She stood up and grabbed the bouquet and they made their way out of the suite they had been using to get ready.

All of Ali’s bridal party made their way to the entrance. Ashlyn was already inside with all of her party, just out of Ali’s sight. Her heart began to beat a little faster as Becky took the first step. In just a few moments she would get to see Ashlyn, and they would be married, and they would spend their first day of forever together. After Becky was Sydney, one of Ali’s friends from Penn State, and she stepped a little closer. Alex followed, stopping to throw Ali one last excited thumbs up before she started down the aisle.

“You look beautiful,” Kyle whispered, pecking her cheek before stepping into the doorway. He gasped quietly then looked back at her. “Oh Ali… just wait until you see her.” And with that, he started down the aisle.

The only remaining members of the processional was Sydney’s son Cassius, who was taking his role of ring bearer very seriously. On either side of him were the flower girls, his sister Roux and Alex’s daughter Viviana, born just a few days after that fateful day that Ali had decided to trust her gut and take the leap. He carefully led both little girls down the aisle, earning several aws before the doors were pulled shut.

Ali took a deep breath, smoothing her hands over the fabric of her gown one last time before taking her dad’s arm. He smiled at her. “He’s right, y’know. You look stunning.”

She beamed up at him, overcome with the emotion of the moment. “Thank you,” she choked out.

“Hey now,” he ran his thumb under her eyes. “None of that, or Kyle’s going to be mad about you ruining your makeup.” The venue coordinator gave Ali a questioning look and Ali nodded. The music began to swell, and she heard everyone inside stand up. Then the doors opened again, and she and her dad started down the aisle.

Inside was beautiful, everything Ali had dreamed of since she was a little kid. Everything was softly lit, making the atrium seem almost magical. To the side of the atrium, Christen was standing in a long silk gown, playing the violin next to a woman playing the piano, the two of them working together to produce the beautiful music that Ali was now walking to. To say that she was proud of Christen for finally leaving the bakery to pursue her dreams was an understatement. She and Ashlyn had come to see every engagement she booked once she moved to New York, nearly crying the first time she took the stage at the Met. She was so happy that her former employee had finally taken the steps to pursue the things she wanted in life, including a certain home health nurse who had also made the move to the small Brooklyn apartment, and was now seated with Ali and Ashlyn’s other guests.

The guests were all turned to look at her, but she couldn’t see any of them. When her eyes landed on Ashlyn, she thought for a moment she would faint. She looked as breathtaking as ever. Her hair had grown out in the subsequent years of them dating and being engaged, now shoulder length and blonde, but still immaculately styled. She was in a crisp black suit that fit her perfectly, but more importantly than the clothes she was wearing was the look on her face.

She had a hand covering her mouth, her eyes already teary as she watched Ali walk towards her. All at once, Ali was a little annoyed with Christen and the other musician; why were they playing so slowly? Didn’t they realize that she wanted to hurry up and get to the alter? But her dad’s reassuring hand on hers kept her walking steadily down the aisle.

Finally tearing her eyes away from her fiancée, she glanced down the line at Ashlyn’s wedding party. Her brother, Chris, was standing at her side, followed by Megan, Kelley, and Earl, Ashlyn’s old boss. He’d nearly cried when Ashlyn asked him to be a part of the wedding, insisting that he was too old and too ugly to be up at the front like that, but she insisted that he was family, and she wouldn’t do it without him.

Her eyes went back to Ashlyn and she couldn’t help but think for the millionth time that she had been so unbelievably lucky to find her. “I love you,” she mouthed.

Ashlyn gave her a big dimpled grin. “I love you,” she mouthed back.

They finally reached the alter and her dad gave her a soft kiss on the cheek. “Your mom and I love you more than words can say, sweetheart.” He stepped away and Ali took her space next to Ashlyn, taking her hand tightly in her own.

If someone had asked Ali later on what the officiant had said, she wouldn’t have been able to tell them. All she knew were the hazel eyes shining down at her, the way Ashlyn was nervously nibbling at her lip, the feel of her hands, warm in her own. They repeated the words he told them to, and Ali felt so full of love she was sure she would explode. It didn’t seem possible for one person to be so happy, so full of bliss.

Before she knew it, rings were exchanged, and the officiant was saying the words she had so often imagined in her head: “By the power invested in me, you may now kiss the bride,” and then her hand was on Ashlyn’s neck, and Ashlyn’s arms were encircling her waist, and she was lost in their first kiss as a married couple.

They broke apart and turned to the assembled guests, the people who loved and cherished them, who had been beside them during this entire journey. Ali looked out over the smiling faces then turned back to Ashlyn for another kiss. They had made it.

The ceremony turned out to be something for the history books. Everyone filled their plates, visited the open bar, and made merry on the dance floor. For her part, Ali just enjoyed the ride as she and Ali were whisked around from person to person, not even caring that she’d only had half a plate of food, who needed to eat when the love of your life was on your arm and giving you that smile?

Before she knew it, the venue coordinator told them that the car was headed their way, that they had time for one final dance before the send-off. Ash led her to the dance floor and pulled her close.

“You look so beautiful right now,” Ash murmured just loud enough for Ali to hear.

“Is that it? Not gonna make a dumb honeymoon joke about getting me out of this dress?” Ali asked, wrinkling her nose.

“I can’t even joke right now. I’m too overwhelmed with how perfect this day has been, and how much I love you.”

Ali stretched up, giving her a soft kiss, then rested her head on her shoulder. “I love you, too. I couldn’t have asked for more.”

“Can you believe that this is just the beginning?” Ash asked. “It’s the first day of the rest of our lives. Whatever comes next, be it with our careers or kids, whatever it may be, we’ll get to trace it back to today. Forever starts now, and you’re not getting rid of me.”

Ali smiled. “I wouldn’t even dream of it. You make forever seem too short.” She glanced up to see the venue coordinator beckoning them off the dance floor, and led Ashlyn that way. They stood just inside the door as everyone lined up outside, sparklers in hand. The car pulled up and Ashlyn took her hand.

“Ready to go home?”

Ali just smiled. “As long as I’m by your side, I’m already there.”