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"HA SOOYOUNG! OPEN THIS DOOR NOW! I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE! CAN YOU HEAR ME!"
Hana continuously pounded her fists on the door hoping the said girl hadn't done anything to harm herself. She had been at this for hours. Her frustration and worry had finally gotten the best of her as tears finally rolled down her face.
"SOOYOUNG AH!"
Her voice desperately called out for her best friend.
"PLEASE!"
She finally stopped, feeling the dread in her heart growing and the exhaustion from the day finally kicking in. Her back was to the door as her legs finally gave out. She slid to the floor with a thump, her face in her hands. She had found out a couple hours ago that her best friend, Jinsoul passed away in an accident. Her wild best friend always had a knack for messing with death. Alcohol, smoking and motorcycles. Her best friend was a daredevil. Of course, she never minded, the girl was too stubborn. She knew Jinsoul would never listen to her. Jinsoul insisted on following her own flow and way of life. She would call Hana a bore sometimes for playing it safe but Hana never took offence to it. She knew Jinsoul didn't mean it in a bad way. Hana rushed to find Sooyoung, her other best friend/long time crush who also happened to be Jinsoul's girlfriend when she heard that Sooyoung had found out about Jinsoul's death.
Hana wasn't sure what the brunette was capable of. She didn't plan on finding out as she immediately rushed to Sooyoung's apartment but Sooyoung wasn't there. She drove like a mad man to Jinsoul's apartment, breaking god knows how many laws while she was at it, knowing that the only possible place Sooyoung would go was there. 6 hours later, she was still knocking hoping to receive even a squeak. Her hopes slowly decreased with each minute. Hana couldn't stand it anymore. She stood up, bracing herself as she broke the door open, rushing forward and using the force of her whole body to open it. She ran in and checked the bathroom then the kitchen and the bedroom. The apartment was empty. Hana ruffled her hair in frustration. She was close to losing her mind.
She then heard a familiar sob in the bedroom. She walked in and heard the sobbing noises coming from below the bed. She crouched onto the floor and saw Sooyoung curled up into a ball. Her eyes were red rimmed, her nose red and her mascara was runny from all the crying. The sight of Sooyoung crying hurt Hana more than anything in the world. Never would she ever hoped to see Sooyoung sad. She reached her hand out to Sooyoung who flinched making Hana jerk back.
"Sooyoungie. It's me. I'm here" Hana said in a soft tone, coaxing Sooyoung to trust her.
She extended her hand once more as Sooyoung slowly reached out to take Hana's hand. Hana grasped Sooyoung's hand and slowly pulled the girl out from under the bed and carried her bridal style. She softly laid Sooyoung onto the bed. She allowed Sooyoung to rest comfortably on the pillow as she sat beside Sooyoung without muttering a single word. Her mind pulling her into a flashback.
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"Ya, Lee Hana. What are you thinking so deeply about?" Jinsoul asked teasingly.
The blonde's arm was wrapped loosely around Sooyoung's waist as they sat beside each other on the bed. Hana gave Jinsoul a small smile as she fiddled with the keys of the keyboard. Playing random tunes and notes. Her mind cluttered. All she could focus on was her two best friends fooling around on the bed. As much as it pained her to see the love of her life with someone else, she was happy to know that it was her best friend. The blonde's phone buzzed as she pulled away from Sooyoung and left the bed. She took her phone and her jacket from the chair.
"I need to go. I have an appointment with someone" Jinsoul said offering Sooyoung a guilty smile.
Sooyoung frowned. "Must you go?" Sooyoung asked with her arms crossed.
Jinsoul gave a tight lipped smile as she nodded without saying anything. She waved at Hana before leaving the apartment. Hana heard Sooyoung huffed in annoyance as she flopped back onto the bed. Hana chuckled softly at Sooyoung's reactions earning a fish plushie to her face. Hana's quick reflex allowed her to avoid the plushie, the soft toy landing on the floor with a soft thud. Hana shook her head as she moved from the keyboard and picked up the fallen plushie, handing it back to Sooyoung. She sat at the edge of the bed, not wanting to go any closer in fear that she would make a mistake. She knew the boundaries that she needed to keep especially with Sooyoung. Hana was surprised however when she felt Sooyoung lean her head onto Hana's back. Hana could feel her heart skip a beat at the girl's warmth.
"Why does she leave every day? She always has an appointment and she never tells me with who. She leaves at random times and comes back late or the next day completely drunk" Yves complained.
Hana sighed, knowing Jinsoul's rebel like attitude. They had been best friends since they were 13 and 8 years later, the blonde had completely changed. From a soft spoken child to a rulebreaker. Jinsoul had told Hana on one of their night outings that she was tired of living according to what her parents and her family expected. She wanted to be free and rebel. But Jinsoul had loved the dark side so much that she dabbled in it. Alcohol, illegal racing and everything in between. Hana never said anything to stop it because she knew Jinsoul would never listen to her, the blonde was too stubborn and refused to listen to anyone but herself. Not even her girlfriend.
A week later, Sooyoung had found out that the appointments that Jinsoul had was with another girl. Sooyoung was more than pissed. She was livid. Hana was shocked since she had been with Jinsoul, hanging out. That was when Sooyoung suddenly barged into the apartment. She slapped Jinsoul hard. Her cheek turning bright red. They fought so hard with Sooyoung throwing things at Jinsoul and screaming. Jinsoul on the other hand simply stood there with a blank expression. Hana stood in the corner, waiting for her opportunity to escape. She saw her chance as she walked out of the apartment but she still could hear the screams. After she had returned to her apartment, she heard a series of knocks on her door. She opened the door and was surprised to see Sooyoung. She allowed Sooyoung in closing the door behind her.
"Did you know?" Sooyoung's question took Hana by surprise. The said girl turned to look at Hana with tear filled eyes.
"No" Hana answered.
Sooyoung then broke down crying as Hana walked over to pull Sooyoung into her arms.
Sooyoung's sobs were muffled as she cried into Hana's shoulders wetting her shirt but Hana didn't caare. All she cared about was the girl crying her arms. Sooyoung ended up sleeping in Hana's bed while Hana slept on the couch. After that incident, Sooyoung never spoke to Jinsoul anymore. Hana also couldn't find Jinsoul anywhere. The girl never answered Hana's text or calls.
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Hana sighed deeply letting her arm cover her eyes. The reason she didn't see Jinsoul was not because she didn't want to but because the girl had disappeared without a trace. Up until this morning.
15 Hours Earlier
At dawn, Hana was awoken by the sound of her phone ringing. The familiar ringtone blared through her room. She groaned, opening her eyes, reluctantly getting up to take her phone. It was an unknown number. Who...
She answered it, the caller identifying himself as a police officer. She was surprised to receive a call from the Seoul Metropolitan Police. They called because they needed her to identify a body. They believe it was her friend. She hurriedly got out of bed and headed to the hospital without a single knowledge of what the hell was going on or who they meant. Outside the morgue stood two officers who greeted her.
"You must be Hana."
Hana nodded as she was escorted into the morgue as the coroner lifted the white cloth. Hana gasped when she saw her best friend lying on the table motionless. Her legs turned jelly as she fell to the cold ground of the morgue. She looked up to see the officers giving her looks of pity.
"We are very sorry for your loss, Miss Lee. We received a report about an accident late last night and found her lying motionless in a pool of blood. Your number was at the top of her call list so we called you here" the officer explained.
"Wh...What was the cause?" Hana asked with a shaky voice.
"Alcohol intoxication" the officer replied.
Hana winced as she silently cursed.
"Can I have a moment?" Hana asked.
The officers nodded as they filed out of the morgue. Hana walked back to Jinsoul's cold body. Her tears fell. She remembered her best friend's laughs, jokes and her stories. As much as she resented her best friend for hurting Sooyoung, she would never have wished death upon her.
"Dumb. Stupid. Foolish. Blonde. I told you not to indulged in all the alcohol and to never drink and drive. Look at you! What am I suppose to do without you? What is Sooyoung suppose to do without you? Do you know how heartbroken she would be to hear about you? Why were you so stupid?"
Hana knew that saying all of that wouldn't even matter anymore. She gave her last farewells to Jinsoul. She then shakily called Haseul and told her about Jinsoul. The other girl was clearly shocked as she said nothing through the phone. The silence passed when Haseul said that she would go to the morgue with Vivi. She told Hana to wait and she would be there as soon as she could. The call ended as Hana pocketed the phone. She slowly covered Jinsoul's upper half with the white cloth as she exited the morgue. She leaned against the wall as she slid down to the floor in despair. How am I going to tell Sooyoung? She would be devastated. Hana thought to herself. She gripped onto her head feeling an impending headache as she was thrown into confusion. Not long after, a bob haired girl and a redhead appeared running down the hallway towards her.
"Hana" the bob haired girl called out softly.
Hana looked up as she burst out sobbing at the sight of Haseul and Vivi. Haseul knelt down to pull Hana into her arms as Hana hid in the crook of her neck.
"It's okay. It's all going to be alright" Haseul whispered it over and over again. Hana's sobs eventually stopped as she wiped the remainder of her tears away. Haseul helped Hana up as the three of them stood together. "What do you plan to do now?" Vivi ask
ed. Hana knew what Vivi was referring to. But she didn't know either.
"Do the others know?" Hana asked weakly.
"I called Jungeun earlier so I'm sure the other girls must have found out already" Haseul said.
Just then, Hana's phone buzzed. Jungeun's name flashed across the screen. Hana answered the call.
Jungeun: Hana. It's an emergency.
Hana was surprised at Jungeun's sudden urgency.
Hana: What do you mean, Jungeun?
Jungeun: It's Sooyoung. I called her earlier to tell her about Jinsoul. Suddenly, the line went silent and she hung up the phone. She won't pick up after that. All the calls went straight to voicemail.
Hana's eyes immediately widened as she ended the call. She ran out of the hospital and went to search for Sooyoung. She ignored the calls from Haseul and Vivi as she prayed that Sooyoung was alright.
PRESENT
Hana looked down and saw that Sooyoung was asleep. She left the girl alone as she slowly got out of bed. She covered the girl with a blanket and left the room. Hana looked at the clock. It was already close to 9 pm. There was nothing she could really do while Sooyoung was asleep so she left Sooyoung in the apartment and returned to her own. The next morning, Hana had bought breakfast knowing that Sooyoung hadn't eaten. What she came back to was a whole mess. Sooyoung was awake and thrashing things around. There were shards of broken glass everywhere and the pillows were thrown around. The TV turned upside down and the keyboard broken in half. Hana dropped the plastic bag and pulled Sooyoung into her arms. She attempted to calm Sooyoung down but the girl was strong and resisted Hana.
"Sooyoung. Calm down!" Hana said loudly
. After a while of struggling, Sooyoung eventually grew tired as she fell to the floor along with Hana. Feeling a sudden sting, she looked down to the floor as Hana saw that her hand was bleeding from the shards of glass but she said nothing of the pain. Sooyoung sat quietly but Hana could hear the soft sobs that Sooyoung was trying to hide. Both of them had lost the most important person in their lives and she wasn't coming back. Sooyoung suddenly got up and ran out of the apartment. Hana ran after her and called her name but to no avail. Sooyoung was gone leaving Hana anxious. She had just lost one of her best friends. She didn't want to lose the other. A few days had passed since Sooyoung ran away. Hana didn't leave the apartment in case Sooyoung returned. She had cleaned up the mess but the TV was beyond repair. She also wrapped up her injured hand with a bandage not wanting it to become infected.
Hana had just returned from getting groceries. She was about to open the door when she heard footsteps near her. She turned to the side and saw Sooyoung. Sooyoung's whole body was soaked and she was staggering. Hana caught Sooyoung in time as the girl had fell forward. Her complexion was pale and sickly. Hana lifted Sooyoung bridal style as she opened the door using her legs, forgetting about the groceries that were on the floor. She walked into the bathroom and gently lowered Sooyoung into the tub. Sooyoung was a mess as she sat motionlessly with her knees up. Hana turned on the tap as she moved the shower head across Sooyoung's body allowing the hot water to warm Sooyoung. She turned off the water as Sooyoung sat inside the tub silently.
"...I was so worried. I can't .... lose you, Sooyoung. Not after...... Not after I, we, lost Jinsoul" Hana said with a cracked voice.
Despite finding out about Jinsoul's death a few days ago, Hana was still reeling in the reality. Her tears never dried. From behind, she could hear Sooyoung's soft sobs as well. Hana turned to look at Sooyoung. Sooyoung reached out her hands and pulled Hana into her chest.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have left you" Sooyoung said softly.
Hana's fingers clung onto Sooyoung's arm as she let out a choked sob. Hana composed herself as she removed herself from Sooyoung's chest. Sooyoung's hands were still draped around Hana's neck. Hana dared herself to look into Sooyoung's hazel eyes. Sooyoung still looked stunning despite the evident dark eyebags beneath her eyes. Sooyoung on the other hand stared at Hana softly. Sooyoung saw how beautiful Hana looked even with red rimmed eyes and dark eyebags. She unknowingly leaned closer to Hana and connected their lips. Sooyoung moving against her own will as Hana was static. She was too shocked to respond. She eventually returned the kiss after recovering from shock. Realizing what she was doing, she pulled away, keeping Sooyoung at arm's length.
"We... We can't. We shouldn't" Hana says with a heavy guilt weighing on her heart.
She shouldn't be doing this with Sooyoung. Not after Jinsoul just died. What kind of friend would she be?
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to" Sooyoung says sadly.
Hana nods, understanding what Sooyoung meant even without her saying.
Hana leaves Sooyoung to shower as she sits outside. She spots the picture frame of the three of them on the table. She walks towards the table, picking it up as she sees Jinsoul beaming through the picture. Her tears began to well up in her eyes. 'I miss you, Soul. Why did you have to go?' She hugged the picture wishing everything was just a dream. But it wasn't. It was the reality she was going to have to live through every day.
Hana wasn't the only one suffering. Sooyoung had also begun to cry inside the tub. The last thing she had said to Jinsoul was 'I hate you'. She didn't know it was the last time she was going to see the blonde. If she knew, she would have apologized and hugged her tightly. Now, she was never going to be able to say it. 'Stupid Jung Jinsoul! Pabo! Why would you leave me alone? You promised you wouldn't.' Of course, she was mad that Jinsoul had cheated but at the end of the day, Jinsoul was still her best friend like Hana was. It wasn't fair. But nothing ever was.
From now on, they were going to have to learn how to survive without Jinsoul and rely on each other.