Chapter Text
Lars swung his sword at the last insurgency soldier, the gem poofing as his arms fell, the weight of his weapon catching up to him. Wiping his brow, he sheathed the sword and bent to pick up the gem.
He laughed as he stood up, “That must be the last of ‘em in this sector, Steven! I bet I caught more of them than-”
A solid thud behind Lars made him jump and turn around. He turned, expecting another enemy; instead his eyes glanced down in alarm, Steven’s body now laying face down. Lars ran over, dropping the gem to flip Steven onto his back.
Steven groaned, his eyes scrunched in pain as he held his side. Lars went cold as he noticed a red stain quickly growing on Steven’s shirt. Taking a beat to steel himself, Lars gently lifted Steven’s hands to assess the damage.
He winced at the sight, his alarm turning into panic. “S-Steven? Steven, buddy. You- ya gotta wake up, we need to get you back to Earth.” His voice wavered a bit as he tried to shake Steven awake. Lars would’ve tried to lift him, but Steven was several times his weight; Lars’ own undead body didn’t seem to change very much in the past century, even his hair taking forever to grow. He’d never admit it, not even to himself, but he was a bit jealous of how much more ‘human’ he considered Steven to be. Lars’ hands recovered Steven’s wound, trying to prevent further blood loss. It was a futile attempt though; the wound was as big as his hand, maybe large. At this point, Lars was just grateful he couldn’t see any organs.
A few raggedly coughs came from Steven, cursing at the sudden pressure. “I’m definitely awake now, stars!” He finally opened his eyes, looking down at himself. “That’s. Huh. I don’t think I can heal that,” Steven’s voice was quiet and hollow as he continued to stare unblinking at the (almost literal) hole in his side. “Have the others come back?”
Lars shook his head, tears he didn’t even know he was holding back now starting to fall. Where are they? The Crystal Gems should’ve finished off their sector before they had finished theirs. Lars’ mind raced, unsure of what else to do. “They should be here soon, I- I can go meet them halfway,” His eyes kept looking between the wound and the hallway the Gems should be coming down. “If you can heal some of this, we can take you to the hospital as soon as we’re on Earth-”
“Lars.”
“I know you’re against it but you’ve lost so much blood, we gotta get some more back in you-”
“ Lars. ” Steven’s bloody hand covered Lar’s, making Lars jump in surprise and finally look Steven in the eyes. Steven was calm now, the shock setting in. “I told you. I can’t heal this- there’s a limit. You remember when we took down that band of Ioloites? You were there,” he softly grinned. “They didn’t stand a chance against us. But they definitely took a decent chunk of my arm with them, huh?”
Lars felt his sorrow grow as he recalled. They were victorious that day, but Steven was right- his arm had been grazed by a lightgun; a sizable chunk of flesh was shredded, but Steven was able to heal it after a considerable amount of kisses. Even then, Steven needed a blood transplant; his healing spit had closed the wound, but the blood loss was enough to be dangerous. The healing had also left a considerable ‘scar’, bumpy and off-colored compared to how smaller wounds usually healed; Peridot had theorized the spit had to much of a gap to close to properly heal his arm.
Dread grew in his stomach as Lars realized the reality of their situation. Steven truly couldn’t just kiss this problem away, and if the Gems didn’t show up soon then- Lars’ head hung down, trying to hide his tears from Steven.
They had grown so much since they first met. They were practically brothers, at least they considered themselves to be; after watching their mortal friends and family grow old and outlive them, they silently agreed they’d be their own family, feeling so detached from their human lives at that point.
Steven had spent a few months at Lars’ house after his parents had passed. He hadn’t asked, and Lars didn’t mind. They both knew Lars wouldn’t be able to function normally for a bit; Steven being there to help keep the house clean and offer Lars company kept him in reality during that time.
And Lars returned the favor when Connie passed, visiting Steven almost every day. Connie didn’t get to grow old with Steven, sickness taking her early. Steven was the opposite of Lars; angry, destructive. It took some time, but Lars was able to help him cope. He helped him vent, avoid harmful behaviors; a few times Steven was harsh with Lars, but would eventually apologize if it wasn’t directly after an outburst; they both knew he didn’t mean it, and Steven felt he owed him for putting up with it.
Lars also felt he owed so much to Steven; but now, when he needed help the most, he was helpless. Lars shook from crying; his attempts to do so quietly started to fail, finally getting Steven’s attention.
“Hey now, you’re gonna make me cry, you sadsack,” Steven weakly smiled; his face turned to soft concern as Lars looked up at him, “Lars. It’ll...it’ll be ok in the end, I promise.”
Lars’ hands moved and balled into fists in his lap, his tone almost sounding angry as he wailed, eyes scrunched. “Don’t say that! You always say that! You aren’t- you’re…” He looked back up again, voice defeated, “You...I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m supposed to be the adult here...They should be here any minute, man. Please, just hang on.” He scooted away from the wound, closer to Steven’s head, and propped him up a little; Lars tried not to flinch from the hurt sounds Steven failed to suppress.
Steven was sweating just from that effort. He distracted himself with a chuckle, “Lars, you’re like a brother to me- did I ever tell you that? I’ve been meaning to tell you that. And I don’t lie to family, unless. Unless it’s for a surprise party or something.” His breaths were heavy now, his eyes daring to close. “How about this. I promise I’ll live on- as long as you’re nice to yourself.”
Lars almost forgot what was happening from trying to process what Steven just said. He didn’t say anything, but the confusion on Lars’ face prompted Steven to keep talking.
“Be kind to yourself. Take care of yourself, take care of your family. Never unfairly blame yourself. Do what makes you happy, do what makes you angry, do what you need to do to find yourself.” Steven’s face fell as he continued, “Don’t close yourself off. You have family, with the gems, and with the people in Beach City; they care about you, believe it or not.”
Lars realized what he was saying, why he was saying this. “Stop- Steven, we’re gonna get you out of here dude, save that shit for later-”
“ I’m not coming back! ”
Lars flinched away, almost dropping Steven’s upper body. Steven’s eyes looked directly at Lars, multiple emotions crossing his face- sorrow, anger, hope, fear, concern.
Steven finally teared up, accepting their situation. “I’m...not coming back. Please, I can’t stand this; I told you, I don’t lie to family.” He coughed, blood now staining his mouth too. Steven took a beat before his eyes opened again, with some effort. He looked in dull shock back down his body, his eyebrows tiredly raising in surprise. “Oh, that’s. That’s new.”
Lars noticed Steven was looking pale now, but turned his head to where Steven was looking anyways. His gem was glowing from beneath his shirt, the light pulsing. Lars had no idea what this meant; he turned back towards Steven. “What- what is it doing, are you doing that?” Lars voice came out in a whisper, his concern took over his sorrow for a second.
Steven continued to blankly stare at it with tired eyes, looking like he was hypnotized by the flashing pink glow.
“Oh. ... Oh!” With a gasp, his face turned to almost excited shock like he just learned something, before turning to look at Lars with an urgent expression. “Lars. Do you remember when I zombified you? And how I said I would’ve asked you first if I could?”
Lars looked almost fearful at Steven’s sudden burst of energy and replied automatically, not processing what Steven was getting at. “Y-yea? At least the first part; kinda hard to forget something like that.”
Steven quickly sat up and brought his hands to Lars shoulders; if it wasn’t for the blood still heavily flowing from his body and his alarmingly pale figure, Lars would’ve called it a miracle.
“I can do one last thing, I have one last choice, but only with your permission.” Steven’s burst of energy was already starting to fail him, needing to lean on the hand Lars left under him. “Lars, I can continue to protect you, even after all this, but it’s your choice, and yours alone. May I protect you? ” Stevens eyes were wide-eyed with worry, urgency and concern in his voice.
Lars took a moment to process what he was asking, as his weight continued to fall back onto Lars’ hands. “Protect…?” He noticed Steven’s gem was glowing brighter now, pulsing even faster.
Oh.
Oh.
Lars’ head snapped back towards Steven, the man’s head threatening to fall back from exhaustion. “Steven, I…” Lars had thousands of things he wanted to say, but his voice failed him.
Steven’s voice was getting desperate, his strength failing him; his eyes closed and tears fell as his thoughts poured through his mouth. “I never had a choice, but you do. I won’t force it on you. I want to protect you; you’re my family, I want the nest for you. But it’d be yours. Not mine, not Rose, not Pink’s. It’s up to you. It’s your choice. Lars, it’s your choice, make sure what you choose is truly what you want, please. Whatever you choose. I’ll protect you.”
Lars held his friend, his brother, closer to him as he spoke. His jaw clenched, his eyes wide and watery as he considered Steven’s words. Lars cut off a cry as he hugged Steven from the side, the body in his arms starting to go fully limp.
He barely registered the three voices yelling from the hallway; composing his voice as best he could, he let out a choked reply.
“ Of course you can. ”
Lars heard Steven sigh, both of them starting to glow as the three voices grew louder behind them. Lars’ mind went blank; he felt like he was floating in space, surrounded by light pink, his ears ringing; yet it also felt like he was buried under a heavy weight, his senses taken from him. Not in a bad way, either; just everything and nothing at once. He wasn’t sure how long he existed in that space before a sharp pain enveloped him, blooming from his abdomen and lighting all his nerves on fire. It quickly cooled; he thought he felt something pat his shoulder before he jolted awake, gasping for breath as if he was underwater.