Chapter Text
“I often think that the night is more alive and richly coloured than the day.”
─ Vincent Van Gogh
He was sweating, he knew his body was too tired to keep going but, at that point, there wasn’t anything else he could do. He wanted to drown his intrusive thoughts and the only way to do it, at least the only way he knew about, was dancing. Since he’d been a kid, dancing was always there to clear his head, to help him think, to organise his ideas. He needed it, even if he was messing up his usual perfect steps.
Dancing without music was hard, he loved following the tune and its compass. It somehow tangled with his body and made him move almost effortlessly, as if the music were a part of him. He liked that feeling.
But he’d forgotten his headphones so the waves would have to dictate the rhythm. The beach was silent, he enjoyed his moments dancing in the sand and watching the sea from the corner of his eyes as he spinned and twisted his body. It was peaceful, and peace was what his heart needed.
The sky was dark and a million starts could be seen. Jimin thought it was weird because normally it was emptier, but he wasn’t going to complain. Maybe the gods had taken pity on him and were trying to give him some company in form of a mini galaxy. He let himself smile for a second.
The night was always there for him, and the beach and the ocean. Usually, at this time of the night, there was no one to be seen and he could dance freely, without a fear in the world and the gentle breeze would cheer for him and motivate him to keep going, for hours and hours on end.
Tonight, though, it felt different.
The night, the beach and the ocean were there for him, but his music was gone and so was the blissful emotion he was used to feeling during his midnight dances. When had been the last time he’d felt so much despair?
Suddenly, everything seemed darker, despite the full moon shining strongly on top of his head, it was as if the world had lost it’s light, as if somebody had placed a sepia filter on the scenery to dim its colours. Everywhere he looked, he failed to see what every other night had been so clear to him. The beauty of everything that surrounded him, the happiness that he felt by the fact that he was there, that he was alive and that he could dance in such a wonderful place.
Jimin had always loved the beach, but now everything seemed off and he wanted to run away, far from the breeze that kept caressing his cheeks like it was trying to comfort him, far from the cold sand under his feet, far from the pressure in his chest that threatened to choke him.
So he stopped. He couldn’t move his body the way he wanted to, so why keep forcing himself to try? He faced the ocean, asked the seafoam why everything looked so dull. He breathed and some spray hit his face, tiny drops making him shut his eyelids to prevent them from coming into his eyes. He was contemplating the idea of giving up to lay on the cold sand when he heard it.
The violin.
It was faint at first, carried by the wind like by mistake. Maybe Jimin wasn’t supposed to hear it, but he had and it was somehow familiar.
Jimin should think it was weird, a violin in the middle of the night, at the beach. But he was there too and he was dancing, which wasn’t any more normal either, so what could he do? He just turned his head towards where the sound was coming from and listened. He thought he knew the song, which was stupid given that he knew nothing about violins. But it sounded sorrowful and it harmonized with his soul.
His legs moved on its own accord before he could realise what he was doing. He dropped his gaze to his feet and saw them pointing in the direction the music was coming from. He contemplated his options and really, following the soft notes didn’t sound as a bad idea in his brain. So he started walking, bag clutched firmly on his hand and bare feet sinking on the sand.
It took him ten minutes to arrive to a group of huge rocks that looked like the base of a cliff. They weren’t high though and Jimin wondered how could he have never seen them before. Sure, it was secluded area, but he loved to stroll in the beach. A second later, he realised he mostly went in the other direction, given that Yoongi’s house was located on the opposite end of the coast. He sighed and wondered what would happen if he dared to climb the rocks. The music was louder, but it was kind of muffled, maybe due to the rock bodies standing on his way. The moon had moved and now Jimin had it to his right, round and beautiful as it floated above the sea.
If the musician behind the melody was a murderer, Jimin would have nobody to call for help.
If he hurt himself on the rocks, he wouldn’t be able to make it back to his house or to call an ambulance.
If he misstepped -which was a possibility given that his naturally clumsy body was feeling extremely tired- he could fall into the ocean and die.
But he was curious, the music sounded celestial and somehow mystical and he wanted to know, to see who was playing. He wanted to forget about that day and how stupid he had been. So he took a deep breath and started to climb.
It was easier than it had seemed, and he didn’t go up as he thought he would, but instead found some kind of a path that led him through the crags. Was he still scared? A little bit, but he paid it no mind, the music was starting to sound closer and closer. He was following a sort of corridor that was flanked by tall, rocky walls. It was a couple of meters away from the source of the music, still hidden by a huge stone that marked the end of the corridor, when he recognised the song. It was an old song that had stopped playing on the radios a long time ago, but Jimin still found it beautiful, more so for the fact that it was being played by a violin. He took a step forward and then another, until he was no longer covered by the dark. The song came to an end and started again while Jimin stood there, watching, mesmerised.
He never thought that somebody could cover that song with a different instrument and make it sound sadder, til the point in which Jimin felt his own heart being ripped from his chest by the melody. His ears were focused on the sounds, and his eyes fixed on the one guilty of intensifying his heartbreak.
They were on a cliff, surrounded by the ocean and nothing else. The rocks kept going up, up, up behind him, so there was a semicircular wall of rock protecting them, but apart from that, it felt like they were standing right over the ocean. Jimin couldn’t even see the beach from where he stood, but he thought it may be down there, somewhere. It felt like he had entered into a parallel universe, the atmosphere appeared to be different, heavier around him, yet his soul felt lighter. He should be scared of the stranger in front of him and of his recklessness for being so close to the edge ; of his own recent mistakes and his stupidity. Instead, he was enraptured, to the point in which he stopped overthinking everything and decided to enjoy the moment.
It was beautiful. The man’s body dancing close to the edge of the cliff, fearless, as he played the violin delicately yet with so much passion. Jimin could see his passion pouring from his soul, it was in the way his hand carefully held the bow and how his fingers moved on the strings; in his movements as he created the music and in the expression on his face, peaceful and pained.
Beautiful.
If there was something even more stunning than the boy, it was the scenery. His body was framed by the ocean and the sky, both left in the darkness due to the absence of the sun, but still bathed by the moon’s shine. The satellite seemed to be in love with the boy, given that its light fell upon him with intent, surrounding him with a bright silver halo. As if he were in a bubble, the boy moved and the moon followed, and the crazy idea that it was some way of protection for the violinist crossed Jimin’s mind.
It was beautiful and it broke his heart. The song, Jimin knew that song and it hurt. It made his chest ache but it also awoke something Jimin didn’t realised he had missed: the urge to sing. Should he have thought before opening his mouth and singing all of a sudden? Probably, but he didn’t.
Dancing hadn’t helped him overcome the emotions boiling inside of him, so there had to be a different way he could do; and so he sang.
He had long since quitted singing, but in that moment it came easier than dancing and Jimin was relieved. His voice, sometimes off key, sometimes cracking, matched surprisingly well with the violin and he could finally breathe, if only for a little while.
This time, when the song was over it didn’t restart again, and Jimin realised he had closed his eyes. He feared what he would encounter when he opened them, but he had no choice. He peered at his surroundings with only one eye first, before gathering the courage to take a proper look.
The stranger was still standing at the edge of the cliff, like he had no fear for his integrity were he to fall, but now his attention was placed on Jimin. Of all the moments, the wind chose that one to go crazy and ruffle Jimin’s hair so he would look like an idiot, trying to get it out of his eyes. He lost sight of the unknown man for a couple of seconds, until the calm breeze was back. He had a smile on his face and Jimin couldn’t tell if he was being laughed at or not, and he huffed in annoyance when all of his locks were were back in place -or as much in place as possible.-
Opposite to what had happened to him, a waft of warm air messed with the other boy’s gray tresses, but it made him look cute, his hair waving with the breeze as if he were part of the scenery. Jimin was too lost in thought, processing the weird choice of hair dye, so he almost missed the words thrown at him.
“You have a nice voice,” was what he said, and Jimin had definitely not expected that to be the first thing he’d hear. The gray haired man tilted his head when he received no reply. Jimin wondered how he didn’t fall of the cliff when he heard a random voice joining his music.
He shook his head and forced himself to reply, still too surprised himself of what he had done. “My voice… well I-” He cut himself and started again. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have interrupted like that, I was just-”
“Why are you apologising when I complimented you? You did not interrupt anything, if I may say, the song sounded better with you in it.” The stranger moved forward so they would be standing closer to each other.
Like that, with the moon light illuminating him instead of contrasting against him, Jimin could distinguish how long his hair actually was, enough for it to fall into his eyes, messily. He was what Jimin called the quiet kind of beautiful: it struck you and made you look and look and look, made your tongue catch inside your mouth and left you speechless, asking yourself how could such beauty be real. He had forgotten to reply again and the stranger’s face was beginning to look pained.
“I, uh. I’m sorry?” He babbled, in a rush to explain himself without looking like a fool. “I couldn’t stop myself from singing. I used to take lessons when I was a kid, but it’s been so long that now… my voice is kinda weak.”
He could see how the corner of the stranger’s mouth lifted, if only slightly, before he turned around to look for something. When he found it, he walked to it and Jimin watched as he put the violin into a case before sitting down on the ground.
“How did you find me? I thought this place was hidden enough.”
Jimin expected him to grab his things and leave, not to be asked anything else. And yet, his words made Jimin believe that he had interrupted a private moment, that he was not wanted there.
“I… heard the music, when I was at the beach. It got carried by the wind, I think,” he said, moving so his body would be closer to the rock corridor to signal he was leaving. “I’m sorry I interrupted, it was on impulse, I didn’t mean to bother. So…”
The young man’s expression seemed to fall at that and Jimin was confused. Did he want him to stay or not? More importantly, what did Jimin want to do? Why was he asking himself so many questions? The situation was not supposed to be so complicated.
“I am the one who has to apologise, if I made you feel unwelcome here.” His voice was deep, which Jimin wouldn’t have guessed from his appearance alone. “It’s just that I’ve never seen somebody else in this part of the beach, so I was surprised. In the good way, though.”
Jimin relaxed a bit and let a smile grace his lips, a gentle grin to let the other know he’d heard. He was still very much confused as to what he was supposed to do. He took in his surroundings as the silence settled between them, the moon higher than ever, its light falling on them and making everything as clear as if it were midday. The salty smell of the ocean caught his attention and he wondered how far they’d actually be from the beach, so he approached the edge of the cliff -still keeping a careful distance to it, just in case- and peeked down. The water was closer than what he’d originally believed and his surprise must have shown on his face, since a chuckle resounded from behind him, echoing slightly.
“Yeah, we are not far from the sea. Some nights you can even feel the sea spray if you sit on the edge.” Jimin faced him only to raise a judgmental eyebrow, which earned him another gentle laugh. “Even if you were to fall, the sea would catch you. It is not dangerous, don’t worry.”
“If you say so,” Jimin replied, but he had already returned to watching the horizon and he was unconsciously shifting closer to the brink. A couple more of quiet seconds went by, before the deep voice broke the silence again.
“May I ask you… why were you on the beach this late?”
The stranger’s head was hanging over his chest and he was fiddling with his fingers in a nervous manner, as if Jimin made him uncomfortable. But then he raised his head and looked at him, almost with puppy eyes and so much curiosity that Jimin realised that he may not be uncomfortable or trying to get rid of him, but instead the boy may just be shy. He was trying to keep a conversation after all.
He looks lonely, Jimin thought for a second, without reason apart from the feeling the sight of him caused in his chest. So he did the thing that in his mind was the most reasonable: he sat next to him, his back resting against the rocky wall and legs folded in front of him. He kept his distance, but he thought that it was nice; his presence was nice.
“I was doing something as weird as you,” he spoke, eyes travelling from the tips of the stones in front of him to the violin case laying next to the man. “I was dancing in the beach. Or trying to, at least,” he added the last words, on a later thought.
The stranger hummed, eyes placed on Jimin as he listened attentively.
“I always come at night, after I help a friend in his café. It’s good, there are no mirrors nor people, not even loud music. Just… the waves and my thoughts.”
Jimin was beginning to lose himself in his trail of thoughts, remembering the previous events that had led him to where he was now. The pain in his chest had begun to raise again, when a soothing voice quietly asked him if he was a professional dancer. Jimin allowed himself to tell the man next to him a bit of his life in order to keep his mind from wandering to unwanted places.
He tried to keep it brief so he wouldn’t bore the other, but still narrated how he had found his love for dance when he was very young -a kid, really- and how he’d attended various academies to perfect his moves. Now, he was attending university and even though he was scared as hell that he wouldn’t be able to live off dance, like most of his family seemed to think, he kept trying, because he loved it too much to give up.
“The beach welcomes me when I don’t want anybody else to see me dance.” He had said when questioned why he would visit the beach every night for something he could do in a studio.
They were both quiet yet again, but Jimin oddly thought that it wasn’t something he particularly minded. It was late, he had classes and lessons the next day -should he say that day?- and he was utterly tired.
“And you?” He nodded to the violin and stared at the boy. “What do you do?”
“I come here every night, without fail. I look at the stars and the moon. I play the violin for the whales. Sometimes I sing.”
After a beat, during which Jimin struggled to decipher the words, they locked eyes and Jimin was obviously confused, so why wasn’t the stranger saying anything else? Whales? Sensing his inner turmoil, the stranger gifted him a candid smile, but turned his face towards the cliff rim again. Jimin would have to ask aloud and he was afraid of looking like an idiot while doing so, but did he have any choice? He wasn’t one to enjoy being left with the doubt.
“What do you mean with… whales?” he murmured, afraid of breaking the eerie atmosphere that surrounded them.
“In the past,” he began, like he’d been expecting Jimin to make up his mind, “there were some places in Korea famous for whale watching, you know? Eventually, though, they stopped coming and the locals were devastated.” Jimin had no idea, even if he had lived in Korea all his life.
The back of his head was the only thing Jimin could see, the long gray locks covering most of the expanse of his neck. Jimin scrubbed his eyes when he saw one mole that seemed to move until it disappeared under the shirt. He was obviously going a little crazy from the lack of sleep.
“Japanese hunters are to be blamed for practically extinguishing most species living in the asian seas, that much is true. The thing is, the whales never stopped coming. They are still here, though not everybody can see them.” Jimin’s mouth fell into an ‘o’ and he promised himself to look into the whale watching thing he apparently knew nothing about.
The boy stared at the horizon for a couple of seconds, before adding “Maybe they’re sad, since they had to escape from their old homes,” in such a soft voice that Jimin almost missed it.
“And you can, so you… play for them? The violin?” The young man turned around and beamed at him. It was kind of rectangular, box shaped even, and Jimin found it endearing.
“They like it and it goes well with their own songs.”
Jimin recalled that time he had studied sea creatures and his biology teacher had put this video as a poor excuse to lose time. That had been the first -and last- time he had ever heard the whales singing, communicating. The sounds were majestic, they had made him feel small and lonely. He knew that just because they sounded sad to him it didn’t mean that they were actually sad, but he couldn’t get rid of the hand squeezing his heart when he imagined the violin actually matching the whales’ songs.
“They are the only ones who listen, too.” Jimin’s head snapped in the boy’s direction. He looked so frail. Jimin didn’t know him, had talked to him for one hour at most and knew a total of two things about him. But he wanted to wipe that expression from his face right then and there.
He wanted to keep listening to the violin.
“I will listen, too.” He grinned and the boy looked at him with confusion tinting his features.
“What?” he murmured, baffled, which caused Jimin’s smile to widen.
“I want to listen to you play.” He repeated. Despite the clear bemusement of the boy, he didn’t deny him, so Jimin raised his hand. “I’m Park Jimin.”
After what was probably a whole minute of anxiously waiting, another palm settled on top of his and gave him a light squeeze.
“Kim Taehyung.”