Archive of Our Own

It wasn’t even getting late, but in mid December at eight o’ clock in the evening it felt later than ten in a more reasonable month when the sun had just recently gone down. It had been dark and dreary for hours now, and that wet sort of cold that knocked Californians dead in their tracks. Phoenix had been ready to close shop and hide under an electric blanket 7 degrees ago, but he was a professional, even if he had to ignore the numbing in his feet.

Maya had taken off a little after noon, stating her intent to take a long weekend and go see relatives up in the mountains. “I’ll bring back some snow, just in case you need to remember what warmth is.”

Phoenix had laughed and given her some cookies and a pie to share with the others, and at the time he had truly believed that it was better off in the shop where at least he had the ovens to keep him warm. Almost seven hours and two customers later, hanging out in the snow and goofing off with Maya and the village children seemed infinitely better than mopping the floor for a third time as he waited for the nonexistent foot traffic to bring him surly customers who only wanted bread fresh out of the oven, which he didn’t have, because that would require customers. He already had more bread than he could afford to give earmarked for the local food pantry. It was a good cause, and better than the big companies’ policy of tossing it, but… times were tough. And he was cold and feeling alone without Maya to drag him out of his thoughts. Especially now, with the rain… It made him think more than it should.

And there it was, the real issue. He tried not to fixate on his crush at work, but it was almost impossible when this is where they met, and the vast majority of their meetings were across a counter full of pastries. The dashing rogue with silver hair and silver tongue who had swept him off his feet without even touching him. He had a rich, smooth voice and quiet confidence, mixed with an extrinsic skill of lavishing just enough praise on his target to make them feel special without making them feel smothered. Phoenix had originally assumed the man was a politician, but by now he had to admit it was unlikely. A man like that would be loved by the camera, worshiped by an adoring public. Even if his platform was divergent, his elegant looks and mysterious demeanor would have been like heroin to the local press. There had to be something keeping him in the shadows, and if it wasn't a lack of skill...

Phoenix felt the hair prickle uncomfortably on the back of his neck and realized he had never let the train of thought get that close to the logical conclusion. But why? It was so simple, he either trusted the man or he didn’t. And if he trusted Edgeworth, he could find out his occupation in eight words or less. If he didn't, it didn't matter.   He liked to think he trusted Edgeworth, and yet, he didn’t want to know. Didn’t even want to ask. Was it the other man’s shady past really the problem, or was it Phoenix's inability to react to it properly?

After everything he’d been through, how could fate possibly justify taking this beautiful specimen of a human, a person so perfect he had to have been modeled with all of Phoenix’s weaknesses in mind, and drop him straight into the lap of the one person who had no business falling in love? It made him physically sick, not with nausea but with feverish chills and weak legs, burning and cold and yearning and terrified of the prospect of his desires coming to fruition.

But what was Edgeworth’s angle? It couldn’t be attraction, not unless the man was blind in both eyes or suffering from some sort of fungal infection like the ones caused by those mushrooms in the Amazon that made ants explode, only instead of spreading his evil spores it somehow drove successful men to seduce emotionally vulnerable and physically uninspired men just barely living paycheck to paycheck and pleading to keep their utilities…

No, god no, he wasn’t going to let that comment stand. Fungal possession was one thing, but he was not being seduced… rather, he couldn’t believe it was happening intentionally. He was being seduced by a man who couldn’t realize that even things like a slight flutter of eyelashes, a brushing of fingertips, or a sideways glance were pure unfiltered sex to lowly bakers named Phoenix Wright. It was inhuman that he’d had spent most of his life trying to avoid attracting attention, trying to convince himself he didn’t need to be popular as long as those who knew him liked him, and now someone showed up and treated him like a human being with inherent worth, and it turned out that all of his isolation had just made him so touch-starved that making eye contact with the object of his weirdly intense affections made him want to melt.

This hadn’t even been the first time he’d let himself get taken in like this, and if the first time had been any indication then he wasn’t sure he’d be able to survive a second attempt.

What was he thinking?! He turned up the CD of inoffensive background and tried to focus on moving the mop to the song. It was silly, but it fulfilled his need for distraction, and adding rules to keep him from dancing through his clean areas, he didn’t have time to worry about how many seconds it was until he could lock the door and find a new task to keep his mind off of beautiful enigmas. He was in the middle of a full spin and lining up to catch the handle in a dramatic dip when he glanced at the door and made accidental eye contact with a sadistically refined man trying to hold back an undignified giggle just outside the door. Suddenly the only thing in his mind was that he was a sad and strange goblin of a man who mocked humanity because he could never recreate their fineries with his stunted goblin fingers. He felt like a goat prancing in front of a unicorn.

But mostly he just felt fucking stupid.

At the end of time, when the human species was but a distant memory, alien beings would still be sitting around their antigravity tables laughing about the day Phoenix Wright killed the concept of arousal.

He stormed his way to the door before he decided if he had a solid plan besides assuming the earth would swallow him up for his hubris. “You let me- you let me?!” The sentence ended there because Phoenix couldn’t bring himself to put words to the crimes he had just committed. For his part, Edgeworth at least made an attempt to keep a straight face.

“I didn’t think you were open, given the, erm…..” The man’s eyes shifted to one side with just the smallest glint of amusement.

“You think I think you don’t know my hours by now?!” Phoenix returned, determined to not let his lack of any actual wrongdoing prevent him from being furious.

“I assumed you had closed early!” Edgeworth showed his palms in surrender. “It’s certainly not part of your usual routine.”

“Well, what do you want?!”

The silver-haired man shrugged congenially. “It’s raining.” he responded with a slight glance to the sky.

“You had Gumshoe drive you across town so you could wait out the rain here?” Phoenix anger was suddenly sidetracked by the idea of Edgeworth calling his driver to get a ride that would have to have taken over an hour with evening traffic, just to wait hang out at the store while Phoenix cleaned up for ten minutes. It seemed out of character. Maybe sweet? Possibly too sweet? His brain tried to drag him back into the debate about what reason the dashing man would have for showing him attention, and he forced them back into the maelstrom of his thoughts as he shifted to let the man in.

“I left Gumshoe at a bar,” Edgeworth replied easily. He even made walking look good, spinning on his heel to face Phoenix with just enough power for his coat to flare up like a cape without it falling from his shoulders. “He’s got a pretty little thing there he likes to look at, but he never approaches her. It’s become so painful to watch. I thought I might enjoy myself more at your business.” He offered a smile that seemed too kind to be real. Phoenix couldn’t imagine such a man really opening up like that to anyone. “You donate your unsold bread, right? I thought I might offer you a ride to the shelter. Your work is too valuable to get soaked by the rain.”

And now this, a selfless offer to help with charity, so caring that it actually activated his fight-or-flight response. He backed into one of the shelves just trying to put some space between them so he could think coherent thoughts, just for one second, and ended up clinging to the edge for stability. Edgeworth either didn’t notice, or graciously pretended he was too busy reading from the tea supply.

“It’s a high-end brand, Wright, but it doesn’t necessarily translate to quality,” he remarked blandly, “their green tea in particular has a tendency to cause people’s stomachs to cramp up. If you like, I can recommend...” he finally turned a little and met his eyes. “But something tells me you’re not interested in talking about tea right now.” He brushed his bangs out of the way with an unnecessary amount of grace and turned to give the baker his full attention. “Something on your mind?”

“I didn’t know you could drive.” It was the only thing in Phoenix’s mind that couldn’t be interpreted as accusatory or desperate.

And there was the perfect amount of surprise, raised eyebrows followed by just a slight pout. Enough to show his pride was injured, but not enough to give the impression he was truly wounded. “I’ll have you know I handle a car much better than my driver.”

“Then why?”

“It’s complicated with Richard. He serves as my driver, but his talents lie elsewhere. For one, he frees up my time for other actions. These days an entire office can be run from a cell phone.” Edgeworth explained, casually reaching into a coat pocket for what looked like an eyeglass case and turned out to be full of cigars. He had already started to pull one out before he made eye contact with Phoenix and realized where he was. “Sorry,” he muttered, and his perturbed glance was unrehearsed, the action of a man who didn’t make mistakes because he didn’t allow them to happen.

It was at that second that Phoenix realized that this was more than just a casual visit for cream puffs. “It’s not that I mind, but health code regulations...”

“I know.” Edgeworth snapped just a little too quickly, his eyes flashing darkly before he caught himself. “I truly am sorry, force of habit.” Brushing his hair back, he took a long steadying sigh and slipped back into his usual confidence.

Phoenix had been around short tempers his whole life and he easily managed to keep his flinch internal, maintaining a calm exterior while his mind shot off in five directions at once. That was the tone of an abuser showing the first signs of his public demeanor flaking off. That was the tone of someone who had anger issues but was trying to work on them.

And in the back of his head, the part of him that continued to trust people even when he knew he could be be putting everything he’d worked so hard to build in danger over a vague hunch was absolutely certain that it was the look of a man who was putting up a front because he’d never learned how to exist outside a state of emergency because he’d grown up in a world where everyone and everything could kill you. A man who was totally disconnected from his script by a mild social faux pas because there had been something, one innocent word, one trivial action, perhaps an expression that someone interpreted as arrogant that had shattered his world in a way he’d never been able to fix.

And he knew he should be running at this point, actually physically removing his body from the room because it was the only way he was going to keep his idiot self from throwing himself under the bus for the sake of someone he’d managed to know for over a month without really knowing.

He didn’t even know his first name.

Or if Edgeworth was even his real last name.

Because his current occupation wasn’t the only train of thought that Phoenix was actively suppressing. And if Edgeworth wasn’t just a stranger he’d recently met…

“You could try patches,” he offered, “I’ve heard one cigar can have more tobacco than an entire pack of cigarettes.” He waited to see if the reaction to personal critique would tell him anything about the man who had dropped into his life like a brick in a fish tank.

Miles huffed and jerked his head to left to aggressively study a calendar with a dull view of a field.

“I know the kids like vaping, but I just can’t imagine you smelling like cotton candy,” he added with a nervous chuckle. “Oh course, you know they’ll all get you in the end.”

Just when he thought he had pushed the issue too far, Miles spun to face him with a generically charmed smile. “You’ve been doing your homework, I see.” he purred. “I admit, it’s a naughty indulgence of mine.” He closed his eyes and let out a long, surprisingly wistful sigh. “I actually gave up cigarettes years ago, but I always come back to this particular vice. It’s like… a fine tea. The right brand, from the right region, aged perfectly… You can smell the earth and the heritage in it. I guess there’s something elegant about it. More civilized than the rest of the world.”

“Except it kills you.”

“You do seem to be fixated on that aspect, yes.” Edgeworth agreed, his voice cooled but still congenial. “I hate to burst whatever image you have of me, but cigars are the least of my worries. Things can kill you, Wright. Cars, pills, booze. Any number of drugs, legal or otherwise. People and ideas kill people. I like dangerous things that don’t pretend to be my friend. As I said, it’s civilized, but I couldn’t say the same about civilization.” His voice had grown dark and somehow haunted as he continued his list, and Phoenix could feel it echoing off his own fears and magnifying them until the air around him seemed to have lost all its warmth. “But I must apologize, I’ve been a wretched guest. Is there something more amicable we could talk about?” His smile was back, but it was forced to the point of breaking.

“I want to talk about you.” Phoenix breathed. Looking the man in the face without immediately glancing away from its glory, and realized for the first time how intense his eyes were. “Blue as the sea” was a common description of eyes, but he’d lived near the ocean long enough to know that the ocean had many colors. Those eyes were the color of the sea just following a storm, when the sky was still grey and the clouds looked like they were taller than any man could comprehend, but there were breaks occasionally where the sun sparkled on the foaming sea as it calmed. A sea that was neither tranquil nor violent, but somewhere in between. “Eyes as mysterious as the sea” sounded generic too, but somehow coming to that realization by himself made it feel more personal. As if by describing the phenomena, he had claimed a small portion of the man for his own.

For his part, Edgeworth absorbed the words slowly, his face slowly passing from anxious to his standard charm, and finally to an uncomfortable but genuine smile. “I…” he faltered, “I admit, I didn’t come here simply with the intention of delivering bread. Neither was it a coincidence that I left my driver at the bar. In fact, if I had to hazard a guess, I believe he’s figured out where I would have gone and is making his way here on foot.”

“In the rain? You monster!” Phoenix teased.

“Yes, well, he could easily have called a cab, but I’m confident that it hasn’t occurred to him. I said before that he’s more than a driver. He provides an extra pair of eyes and ears, and he’s been helpful in tense situations on more than one occasion. He’s something of a guard dog in that sense, but in some senses… he's the one who keeps me on a leash. I...” He paused, searching for words and obviously not finding them. “I admit, I have a bit of a temper. To be more fair, I have a tendency to let my temper run away with me. Richard has stopped me from some of my more… indiscreet urges.” He looked like he meant to say more, but had forgotten the way to form words from thoughts.

“I mean, are we talking like flipping off another driver or going on a shooting spree?” Phoenix was surprised that he was taking this so well. It wasn’t until he spoke that he realized how insane it was that neither one had ever mentioned the obvious holster Edgeworth was never without.

Edgeworth seemed grateful for the guidance in the conversation. “I’m a terrible shot, actually. I hate practicing as well, I’ve never gotten used to the recoil. I don’t know how people manage to separate pulling a trigger from the destructive force it causes...” He patted the lump in his coat. “If you tell anyone I’ll deny it, but I’m not great under pressure. So far I’ve relied on a few warning shots and the illusion that I could do worse if I chose to.”

“But doesn’t carrying it make you stand out as a target?” That seemed to catch Edgeworth off guard, and he became quiet as he contemplated it.

“I guess I’ve forgotten what it’s like to be in a situation where I’m not being targeted,” he finally admitted softly, “which is why we need to talk about things. I’ve told you my driver tries to save me from my indiscretions. The problem is, I’ve recently noticed he seems to have decided that one of my indiscretions works out of a small brick bakery and doesn’t seem to realize how good he’s gotten at compromising my judgment.” He was looking out the window, with the rain-wet street tossing the colors of signs onto his pale skin. It looked like the sort of painting you’d find on a cheap novel about the consummate playboy brought to his knees by love. Phoenix wasn’t sure if he was supposed to lay on the floor and bare his heaving chest to join the composition as the malignant lover who finally slew the king, but he knew that stories like this were either tragic or irreparably dull, and the fact that Edgeworth was framing what could be interpreted as a confession of love as a weakness threw ice-cold water on his exhilaration.

“Am I really that bad?” Phoenix asked.

Edgeworth startled a bit at the question. “We’re bad, Wright,” he explained, as if that cleared things up. “Can I smoke in the back room? I can’t get through this without something.”

“I have employees, so it’s still a public space. Excuse me, but could you go back to the part where we’re bad?”

“I’m trying to tell you I need to move on.”

“You what?!” The reply even hurt Phoenix’s ears. “That’s where you were heading?! ‘I like you, let’s break up?!”

“It’s not what you wanted. I apologize,” Edgeworth replied stoically, “but if you considered us together, then yes, that’s exactly what I came to say.” He closed his eyes and sighed deeply like he was trying to build himself up. “We had a good run, considering. I would have liked to have explored what’s happening here further, under different conditions. I can still deliver your bread if you wish.”

“You’re worried about the bread?!”

“Not particularly, but I made an offer, and I’ll make good on it.” Miles explained.

“But you-” there were too many emotions to try to form thoughts. “Why did you even come here in the first place?!”

“You forgot our meet cute?” Miles replied with sarcastic hurt. “I needed to get out of the rain. You had a warm bakery. Our eyes met and at least one of us came to understand that ‘love at first sight’ might actually exist. At least one of us knew that a long-term relationship was impossible.” Phoenix just stared, slack-jawed and feeling like an idiot. “In the interest of full disclosure,” he added in a less confident voice, “I enjoyed it, and I put off this discussion because I was enjoying it. I apologize for my deception.”

“Well, what were you trying to accomplish?” There were so many thoughts going through his head that he couldn’t force any of them into being. It was like he was trying to play whack-a-mole with a thousand conflicting emotions and missing every single one. “Couldn’t you have told me how you felt?” That was the only thing he could finally focus on.

“I… I thought if we kept it simple, it would take longer to become an issue.”

“And what do you define as an issue?!”

“Gumshoe suspects.” Edgeworth shot back, and the context implied it was his driver, but Phoenix had never heard that name before, except he was almost certain he had, and the pieces didn’t quite fit yet but he was being to see that the pieces definitely could fit if he just put them right- he snapped out of the train of thought into the middle of a sentence, “-doesn’t even realize bacon comes from pigs, if he’s figured out that I’m going out of my way to come here, then other people certainly have.”

“Who are other people?!” Phoenix snapped, “like bad guys?”

In another discussion, without the tense atmosphere, Edgeworth’s reaction would have been hilarious. He slammed out of his train of thought so hard it was like he had actually suffered a blow and stared at Phoenix with the blank, uncomprehending stare of a child who had just been asked why they liked their particular favorite hero.

“Bad guys?!” He looked like he was trying to force himself back into the script an adult would use in public and failing badly. “This isn’t kindergarten, we’re not talking about men in fedoras with bags with dollar signs on them.”

“I know that!” Phoenix snapped, and part of his brain realized that that this was the first time he’d ever raised his voice when addressing his crush and how fucked it was that it wasn’t about about a radio station or pizza toppings but about whether or not one of them was going to be murdered. “I’m just trying to understand the scale of things. Is your PR guy going to be mad you’re dating a guy, or will your rich relatives cut off your trust fund for dating an uneducated artist, or is one of us is going to end up at the bottom of the ocean because you haven’t told me what it is that you do that requires guns and drivers and burner phones. And please don’t think I didn’t catch on that you smoke fifty dollar cigars but text me on a phone an elementary student would be mortified to use in public.”

“Yes...” When he saw the lost look on Edgeworth’s face he regretted not pulling that punch. A cigar in a place of business was apparently just a straw on the iceberg of what was going on here, and it wasn’t hard to see that Edgeworth was noticeably clenching his left arm to try to keep himself from shaking. “I’ve been far too casual about the situation. It’s not like me to let things get out of control.” He pulled his cigar case out again, and this time made no attempt to apologize or hide his actions. “It’s closer to the last option, although depending on how much certain people care, it could actually be worse.” He lit his cigar with fingers they both pretended were solid and took a deep drag.

“Worse than death?!” That time Phoenix couldn’t have tried to regulate his emotions if it had occurred to him to try. “What about Maya?! What have you gotten me into?”

“I don’t know.” Edgeworth mumbled, like a child who had given up on arguing and just wanted his punishment to be done so he could get on with his life. “I’ve treated you unfairly.”

“You think that makes everything better?!”

“I know that it doesn’t.”

“Look you owe me-”

“I owe you a great deal, Wright, and if it was in my power, I’d give it all to you and the moon as well. However, the truth is that I don’t owe you anything I can provide.” He replied sharply. “I truly regret that this is how you were told, but the sooner we both can recognize things as what they are, the easier it will be. I need to make some calls and some promises and see how deep I’ve dug myself. My initial investigation has proven that things are more dire than I had thought.”  He glanced sideways at Phoenix and quickly glanced away again. “I thought it would help if I explained myself, but I’ve miscalculated many things. I’m not at my best, and I acknowledge that and apologize for my shortcomings. I don’t expect you to forgive me, in fact it speaks well of your character that you don’t. I should go now.”

“And what about me?!” Phoenix yelled. “What do I do?!”

Edgeworth turned slightly. “There is one thing, if you’re willing.”

“And what is that?” Everything hurt, but something told him what was coming next was even worse.

This time Edgeworth stared him straight in the eyes. “Tell me to leave. Throw me out and get a restraining order and buy yourself a gun, or at least a taser. Tell anyone who asks how you never wanted to see me and you sure as hell never want to see me again. For all you know I’m dead, and you don’t want to see me come back. Tell them I was a selfish asshole and I forced my way into your life and smoked cigars and ruined your fucking bread and in the end I wasn’t even sorry for what I did. I blew through your life like a truck through your storefront. Tell them the truth.” Edgeworth had a way of talking, something like an advanced version of the Voice of Authority that parents used on their children, that made everything sound like a contract. While Phoenix’s mind was crumbling out from under him, part of his mind was fixated on the idea that the man truly missed his calling as a public official. “When you throw me out, I want you to make me believe it. I want you to believe it. That’s what you can do.”

“But-” Phoenix tried to retort before he realized he hadn’t processed a third of what had been said and hadn’t come up with a reply to any of it. “That’s not what I feel.”

“You seemed adamant a second ago that you didn’t want to take the risks I proposed. I'm serious that one of us could easily end up dead.  I’ve been left for dead a few times, it’s worse than you think. Your gut reaction was the right one, you don’t want to put yourself at risk over this.”

“How? What happened to you?”

“It happens sometimes. You think you’ve got things under control, and all of a sudden you’re lying in a puddle of your own vomit and you realize there’s nothing you can do to get out of the hole you dug for yourself. Everything’s growing cold around you and your life starts flashing in front of your eyes and you have to face that you’ve never done anything you’ve set out to do.” He sat down hard and took a deep, heavy pull of smoke and held it in for several seconds. “It all makes sense in the end, you know. You could have done it, but you didn’t. You realize you’ve somehow managed to gather people who care for you, and all you’ve left them is the memory of a worthless brat who died for his ideals without even understanding what he wanted.” Another deep pull without making eye contact. “You finally understand that the only contribution you can make in this fucked up world is to stop fucking it up more.” Another strong pull, and Phoenix had done enough casual research on cigar smoke to know that unless he did this often, he was seriously overdosing. “Waking up ruined everything. My first thought was how terrible it was that I managed to survive when-” Phoenix realized had been right about the cigars, even in the dim light he could see that Edgeworth’s pupils had constricted, giving him a look of a wild seer in the middle of prophesying. He’d successfully delivered enough nicotine to his brain to start flipping switches, and he’d finally found the switch that made him realize he was being hysterical. Phoenix saw so many emotions cycle through his head and Immediately be discarded. “I must apologize.” he finally said when he got back to a part of him calm enough to think logically. “I’ve been told I have a flare for the dramatic. As I said, the problem is that I can’t predict the situation-”

“All that, and you still ended up here again?” Phoenix wondered.

Edgeworth was already so mentally prepared for his speech about damage control that it hadn’t occurred to him that his past words still existed. He stared blankly, and then started again like he hadn’t heard. “I don’t know exactly who knows and who cares, and then there’s so many unknowns I can’t account for. You’re likely safe. If we sever ties tonight, you’re not likely to suffer.”

“You said that at the end, everything made sense. Is this where you decided you wanted to end up?”

Edgeworth shot him a warning look. “It all makes sense when there’s nothing left. When you’re back on your feet, trying to get back to the lofty ideals that seemed so compelling as a theory, you realize just how much filth you have drag your way back through. It’s… exhausting. And keep in mind that in the end I also decided that it was for the best that I never opened my eyes again.”

Phoenix stepped closer for the first time since the top had blown off of everything. “Aren’t you worth it? Worth saving? Worth living?”

“Don’t go there,” Edgeworth reminded tersely, “I thought we agreed on your course of actions.”

“You tried to decide for me.” Phoenix huffed.

There was a callous shrug and another long drag of smoke. “So add controlling and manipulative to the list. Go get yourself some strippers and cry into whatever part of them gives you comfort. Smash a windshield or two. Get arrested. You just need a release.” He flashed a weak smile. “I wouldn’t recommend cigars. Nasty habit.”

Phoenix realized he hated that the man looked like a fucking badass with his spirals of smoke and his aloof gaze and he realized that the worst part about it was that he couldn’t find a way to insult it. You smell like a sexy funeral parlor, Edgeworth, you goddamn beautiful psychopath. “I don’t do strippers.”

“There isn’t really a learning curve, Wright. You walk in with money and they’ll handle the rest for you. Incidentally, I can set you up with some cash.” He flipped an impressive money clip out and tossed the whole thing at Phoenix without counting it. “Just make sure it ends up in thongs. I don’t have the power to prevent a mugging in this town right now. Make sure they know it’s gone before you leave.”

“I meant that I didn’t want to.” The cool way he explained it like he was giving driving instructions also pissed Phoenix off. As a kid, he’d always hated it when the people who were fighting always ended up together, and he was beginning to get the idea why it worked so well on the screen as opposed to real life.

“Everyone says that. Someone on your lap can change your mind rather quickly.”

"Are you speaking from experience?"

Miles flashed him an impish grin.  "A lap dance changed my life, Wright.  If I had to name a moment in my life when I was forced with the realization I couldn't spend the rest of my life pretending I was attracted to women..."

“Wait...” Phoenix had a ridiculous look of partial understanding. “Are you a pimp?”

“God...” Edgeworth startled, but then couldn’t stop the chuckle. “Yes, that’s it. I procure nubile young things for washed out old businessmen. If you’re interested, I can get you a pamphlet.” For a moment, he gained that unguarded stance Phoenix had so rarely seen. “Let me know if you want to be on supply or demand, it’s different paperwork.”

“How much is a private dance with you?” Phoenix wasn’t sure if it was an insult or a real question, but he instantly regretted giving his mouth leave to speak.

Edgeworth spun to meet his eyes, and Phoenix was shocked that the expression was less scandalized and more the look of an amateur pianist being challenged to play the one song they had practiced to perfection. “You couldn’t afford me,” he replied with a wicked smirk, “which is a shame, because you look like you could use the instruction and the release.”  He leaned in a little closer.  "I know I could use the release.

“You just said you were leaving.”  Phoenix protested, feeling something growing inside him which definitely included lust but couldn't be defined as such.  

“I said we can’t have a relationship.” Miles pressed. “If you’re telling you actually need practice working up to strippers, then I can definitely give you a lesson before I go.”

Phoenix cracked a small smile, and tried to ignore the growing warmth in his chest. Things had gone so bad so quickly that he’d begun to believe that the tension he’d felt between the subtle flirts had all been delusion on his part, but it was coming through strong and he was again hit by the irony that Edgeworth was sexually attracted to him. “What would it take to stay with you?”

Edgeworth hissed. “I thought we were past that,” he snarled, roughly undoing the first button of the other man's shirt. “Let’s go back to the lap dance, I might be convinced to be generous about it.”

“I don’t want a lap- I mean, I do, I really do, we need to discuss that later-” a firm, leather-gloved hand pushed him into a chair and it felt like his cock literally jumped in his pants. “Okay, we can talk now, but-”

“I don’t negotiate.” Edgeworth hummed, straddling Phoenix’s legs while keeping their bodies slightly apart. An expertly timed knee kept Phoenix from closing the gap. “Not if you still feel like talking. Words are unnecessary.”

Phoenix could taste blood in his mouth and realized he’d been biting the inside of his cheek that hard. It took several tries to get actual words out of his mouth. “You think this will make it easier to let go?” Miles’s teasing glance turned into a sharp glare. “I just… I don’t want to… if we can’t...”

Edgeworth stopped words and thoughts in an instant, leaning in until his breath was warm on Phoenix’s neck. “Shhh...” he soothed. “You’re ruining the mood.”

Phoenix tried to lean in to kiss the face beside him and realized it was already gone. Time seemed to be swelling and pinching oddly, and he was only about forty-two percent convinced that any of this was actually taking place. He raised his hand to touch the other man, and it was definitely a solid hand that stopped him, grasping his wrist with a leather glove. “Let me touch you.” he pleaded.

“Oh, I want you to touch me.” Edgeworth replied huskily, slouching off his jacket. Phoenix jumped slightly at the loud crash it made. “Bulletproof paneling,” Edgeworth noted, guiding Phoenix’s face back to his with his free hand. “Look at me.”

“You think I can look at anything else?”

“I could give you plenty to see.” Edgeworth loosened his tie like he was on a schedule. “You’ve piqued my interest.” He whipped the neckwear off and snapped it against his leg for emphasis, “Although I admit that you’re not standing up to my expectations. “Now, do you want this or not?”

Phoenix looked and sounded like a dog who knew he wasn’t allowed to bark at the cat and trying to find every sound he could get away with.. “Listen, Edgeworth, I appreciate the offer, you have no idea, under any other circumstances-”

Edgeworth flipped a pair of handcuffs from out of a pocket and Phoenix forgot that sentient thought was a thing. “Would it help if you were able to convince yourself later you didn’t have a choice?” he sneered. “Another circumstance to consider if you will.”

A flurry of words and noises came out of Phoenix’s mouth which appeared to include the word Edgeworth, multiple body parts, and imitations of several animals going into heat for the first time. One of his hands found a thigh and latched onto it like it just stole his wallet. Edgeworth grabbed his shoulders and forced him deeper into the chair, and the words bubbled down to a low boil of confused lust.

“You want this,” Miles growled, frustration running hard in his voice as he his thumbs under Phoenix’s collar and tie, loosening them. “I want this. Shall we take things into the back room?” He emphasized his words with a tiny nip on Phoenix’s ear.

“Oh my god, step on me.” Phoenix replied without even thinking it first. “Wait, don’t. Or maybe do.” Still no help from his brain. “God, just tell me we’ll see each other again, and you can do anything that leaves me alive. I’m willing to negotiate that.”

“You’re absolutely impossible, Wright.” Edgeworth purred, but all the interest had left his voice. “I can’t change your mind?”

Phoenix reached up to touch the other man’s face and wasn’t surprised when it was rejected. Edgeworth was now seated in his lap, looking sharply to the side, and trying to pretend he wasn’t sulking, which only made it more endearing. “Come to the back with me. We can talk, I think I have some bourbon from a recipe in the back fridge. Let’s kiss a bit. The store’s closed now, I’ll lock up. Let’s do this right.”

Edgeworth suddenly stood without warning, pacing back to the darker area by the door. “We can’t do this right. If you can’t manage to grasp that concept, we’re done here.” He sighed roughly. “Of course we’re done. We never even started!” He smoothed his clothes down and adjusted his hair back to perfection without another word, and Phoenix suddenly realized that he’d probably associate the sound of handcuffs being pocketed with despair and self-hatred. “You weren’t choosing between the two, you know. You didn’t win a free relationship because you managed to turn down a few orgasms.”

“Just talk to me.”

“It won’t change anything.”

“Tell me who you really are.”

“Fuck that.”

“Excuse me?”

“I’m frustrated. Sue me.” Miles grumbled, glaring out the window.

Phoenix stood up. “I didn’t mean to insult you. You’re the most handsome man I’ve ever met and you…” He sighed in frustration. “I feel a connection to you. Something… something I can’t explain.” His mouth was dry, and his mind was racing again, and Edgeworth wanted him, and how could that even happen? How could he decline? How could he live with himself in five years when he was alone at night and remembering that the most beautiful creature in three counties had offered him sex and he’d refused on principle? He crossed the room to close the distance between them. “I don’t think I could get that close to you without losing me. I know that probably doesn’t even make sense…..”

Edgeworth sighed again, but this time it sounded like he was steadying himself. A few steady breaths, and he drew himself back to his perfect posture, and when he turned around, there was nothing left but the flawless gentleman he’d always been. “I must apologize for my indiscretions,” he said, his eyes showing the perfect amount of sincerity to show he deeply regretted his actions without revealing vulnerability, “I’ve badly misread the circumstances. You made your position clear, it was my own self-deception that kept me from accepting it. Again, you have my most sincere apologies.” He took Phoenix’s hand like he intended to kiss it, but thought better of it.

“You didn’t misread anything, you’re everything I’ve ever wanted.” Phoenix protested, taking Edgeworth’s offered hand in both of his. “I… I just can’t do casual.”

There was a bit of sadness in those grey eyes, but he had retreated behind his defenses and he wasn’t about to come back out. “You’re a very kind man, Wright. It has been an absolute joy to have made your acquaintance.” He placed the money clip he’d thrown earlier into Phoenix’s hands. “Don’t spend it on strippers. You’re too good to risk hurting yourself more. I’m sorry I suggested it.” Gently, he folded Phoenix’s fingers around it. “Buy yourself a nice television for the break room. At least you’ll get something good out of our meeting.”

Phoenix’s eyes were wet. “The clip...”

“Keep it.” Edgeworth pressed. “I’m sure you’re clever enough that once you have time to think things through clearly, you’ll understand that I could never be something you needed. But in time, I hope you can at least think of me fondly.”

It was beautiful, with fancy scroll work engraved in it like a piece of antique jewelry, but there was no name. No initials. It was cool in his hands, and for some reason the fact that he hadn’t received it while it was still full of the other man’s warmth was what finally caused the tears to finally spill. “Don’t go, not yet...” he babbled. “Please, just a little more...”

Edgeworth’s smile almost slid off, but he managed to save it. “I’m sorry. I truly am. I should never have let this get this far.”

Every single feeling in his chest was trying to get out, but he couldn’t pin it down into words. But there was that line of thinking, the one he kept shutting down. He was terrified that Edgeworth was a criminal, and he was. And he had never allowed himself to follow a train of thought that might lead to Edgeworth leaving, and now he was leaving. He couldn’t make it worse. With that in mind, he threw himself against Edgeworth’s chest.

“What’s your name?” Phoenix asked softly. “Your real name.” There was a name he both expected and knew to be impossible. The name of someone who had fit the same hole in his heart years ago. Someone shaped exactly like this Edgeworth man, but smaller, more vulnerable. It wasn’t feasible, but… “It would mean more than all the money you could give me.”

Edgeworth took a deep breath. “Edgeworth is my legal name, Wright.” He seemed like he was struggling with ending it there, but then continued of his own accord. “Miles Edgeworth. It won’t do you any good if you’re trying to find me.”

“Miles Edgeworth...”

“It’s not a name I give out easily, Wright. I trust you to be discrete.” Miles added. “It won’t help you find me, but if the wrong people were to believe you had a serious connection to me, it could be dangerous. It’s not worth it, Wright.”

“Miles...” A connection. Now that it was over, he’d finally gotten that personal connection.

“I’m serious. You in particular should never have come to know my name.” Edgeworth was pressing gently on his shoulders, trying to gently detach himself. Suddenly he went tense.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“You hesitated.” Phoenix's mind was suddenly running at full capacity. Miles had made a mistake. He hadn’t been moving, so it was something he’d said. He hadn’t said much.

But-

He had singled Phoenix out. Phoenix in particular, he had said. It wasn’t just Edgeworth’s past, it was his. And if it was something that dealt with the underside of society-

“You know about my father.”

Miles pushed him away with more force. “It’s not like you’ve hidden it well.”

“I dropped out of society for three years! I changed my name! I… I’m a baker, for crying out loud! I was a graphic designer!”

“You were off the radar for all of two months.” Edgeworth replied. “Someone found you at a motel out in nowhere, Arizona. Is that where you got the name, by the way? It’s a stripper name.”

“Excuse me?!” Phoenix snorted. A few more realizations hit in rapid succession. “How do you know all this, anyway?! Have you been watching me that long?!” It felt surprisingly violating.

“I lifted your prints off of a pastry box last month.” Edgeworth retorted. “I got the report back from my technician this week.”

“You lifted my prints?!” Phoenix couldn’t even begin to understand his emotions. He wasn’t safe. He’d been betrayed again, and the smug bastard wouldn’t even have mentioned it if Phoenix hadn’t pointed it out. He was pissed. “You couldn’t just fucking ask me?! Was this all just all some sort of ridiculous detective game to you?!”

“If I could do it, others could!” Edgeworth shouted. “I just didn’t realize how many people had! You’re under surveillance. You always have been. Someone must have figured out we’ve been meeting by now. That’s why I have to leave!” He turned to the door.

“Fuck you!”

Edgeworth glanced over his shoulder with a slight smirk. “Are you offering?”

The calm demeanor set him off even more. “Are you… enjoying this?!”

“No, Mr. Wright, I am not.” he replied with the same callousness. “But I came here tonight with the intention of breaking things off, and, indeed, you seem convinced this is over. I wanted you to hate me, and I think I’ve definitely accomplished that. Enjoy your life, Wright, and invest in some gloves. Maybe change your hair if you don’t want people to recognize you. You haven’t even changed your hair since childhood, you think you’re actually-”

Phoenix flinched like he’d been hit by an actual blow.

“Wright..?”

Phoenix sank to the floor, clutching his knees.

“Oh, shit.” Edgeworth hissed, dropping down to his heels. “Oh, I stepped in it.” Phoenix turned to him, and his eyes were exactly as hollow as he’d feared. “Listen, Nick, this doesn’t change anything...”

“Benji?”

Miles looked like he was trying to see if there was any lie that was remotely plausible. He seemed to decide there wasn’t. “Interpol was looking for Miles Edgeworth.” he said quietly. “So you met Benjamin Hunter.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

He shrugged guiltily at the two of them huddled on the floor like lost children. “Because of this.”

Phoenix grabbed his arm, digging in his fingers. “Why didn’t you tell me you were a hostage?!”

“Because I was a hostage.” Edgeworth explained with a gentleness Phoenix wouldn’t have thought possible. “My father called the police, and they cut off my toe and sent it to him. I couldn’t risk it.”

“Oh, god, I’m so sorry, Benji.”

“Miles, please.” Miles said softly. “He made me use that name.”

“God, I’m sorry, Miles. I was so fucking stupid. I swear I had no idea.” There were tears running down his face. “I know it doesn’t excuse it. You were all alone-”

“I had you.” Miles said with finality. Phoenix felt arms against him and his mind told him it was an attack, because of course it was, his father had tortured the boy, killed his father, tried to kill him. Miles had done so much research because he hadn’t wanted to murder the wrong person. It had been an act, all of it…

… and it was exactly what he deserved. He closed his eyes and hoped Ben- no, Miles, would find some peace.

And he was being hugged. “You saved me, Phoenix. Never forget that.”

“You saved me too.” Phoenix protested. “Ben- no, Miles, my father-”

“He hurt you too.”

Phoenix buried his head in the other man’s neck. “He told me you were dead. He told me so many things.” His voice was harsh and choked, but it was all coming out now. “He told me he killed you, he told me you killed yourself. Every time he got mad at me, he had another story.” He took a ragged breath. “He told me that you were locked in the basement and he only fed you when I made you happy. Another sob, and another deep breath. “When I broke into the basement, he said it was a test and I failed. He said he had to kill you now, because I was bad.” His fists clenched deeper into Edgeworth’s coat. “After I ran away for good, a local newspaper got a box addressed to Benjamin Hunter. It had a few teeth with the roots and a bloody children’s shirt.” He lapsed into sobs. “Where did he get the teeth? They weren’t yours, but they were somebody’s.” He couldn’t continue.

“Jesus Christ, Wright.” Phoenix could feel Edgeworth’s breath near his ear. “I knew the man was insane, but…” He tried to push the sullen man away. “Look, you have to understand. He hates people who defy him. He’s mostly ignoring you now because you’re not making trouble. If he knew we were meeting, if he decided you needed to be taught a lesson, there’s nothing I could do to stop him. It’s not just you or I, you have to consider Maya.”

“But, you...”

“I have to go.”

“You can’t!!”

“This is not up for debate, Phoenix!”

“No it isn’t!” Phoenix pushed him back, suddenly and roughly, and Edgeworth just had time to start processing what was happening when he realized Phoenix was patting him down.

“What are you even trying-” Edgeworth’s train of thought stopped when he felt a ratcheting pressure on his wrist, and he looked down just in time to see the other side of the handcuffs slam down on Phoenix’s arm.

“I’m part of this!” Phoenix yelled, tugging his arm to emphasize they were attached. “Now tell me everything!”
Miles looked up at the face of the man who had until this night never raised his voice, never contradicted him once, the man who had the look of someone who always brought spiders outside because all life was sacred.

That man was currently straddling his thighs, tears on his cheeks, but a look that he was going to throw hands if anyone, even his best friend that had just in this instant come back from the dead, tried to tell him what to do.

“Talk.” Phoenix commanded.

Edgeworth hoped he wasn’t blushing as hard as he felt like he was. He closed his eyes and tried to focus on the situation at hand, not on the tense feeling in his stomach.

“Say something!” Phoenix snapped.

Miles closed his eyes and shook his head. “Phoenix Wright,” he said, his voice tinged with equal amounts of frustration and begrudging affection. “We can never have anything nice.”