Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Small towns are like highschools. There's rumors floating around then and most of the people in it have already formed cliques. Newcomers were watched suspiciously and certainly not welcomed.

Which was rough when you were a newcomer in a small town and a highschool.

I guess everyone my age was technically a newcomer to highschool though. But even if they were freshman they had known each other for years, and I was just the weird girl from Nevada who didn't go to the same middle school as anyone else.

It could have been worse to be fair though. I could have started later in the year and not on the official first day.

I couldn't imagine what it would be like to do that though.

"Bay, you want a ride?" My older brother offered.

I nodded. "I don't know if I can fit in a car with your huge amount of dorkiness, but I'll try my best."

He rolled his eyes, "Just get in the damn car."

"Watch your language, you sound like a criminal," I pulled myself off of the couch reluctantly.

"If you don't stop with the cop jokes, I swear." Louis left the house, leaving the door open for me to close and lock it.

I rolled my eyes, pulling out my house keys as I left the house. I then shut the door and locked it to make it secure. "Swearing is for criminals."

His knuckes turned white as he clenched them, trying not to let me win. He didn't want me to know that I had bothered him. But I already knew.

I swung myself into the elderly gray Dodge Caravan and buckled up as he started the car.

The drive to my school wasn't that long. It was about 10 minutes, something I wouldn't mind driving when I was old enough.

"Have fun at school!" My brother stopped the car and started waving to me as I left.

"See ya, wouldn't want to be ya." I muttered, moving as quickly as possible from the car.

From there I went into the swarm of people getting their schedules and other shit worked out. I got mine and then hurried away to homeroom.

It was 0 period which basically meant an hour before normal people went to school. Because I was taking A.P classes, which is not a good idea let me tell you, I was on the smart kid schedule slot. Athletes also had this time slot but while we were in homeroom they were doing strength training.

At least, I was pretty sure how it worked. That's how it would've worked at my old school.

I found the room easily and looked around. There was a spot in the front right corner with nobody nearby. It was perfect.

Well, it was perfect until someone sat directly next to me.

"Hey," the boy leaned closer to me. "Do you have a name or can I just call you mine?"

Oh god. Another straight trying to get into my gay self. "Name's Bailey and I'll never be interested."

I could just barely hear the guy next to him say, "he shoots, he misses, his fragile ego is damaged."

"Okay cool, this never happened. I'm Austin by the way." He then gestured to his friend. "This is Ben."

I laughed at his poor recovery and then smiled. "Nice to meet you both."

Ben smiled at me. "Nice to meet you, ignore him. He's desperate."

"Oh is that what that stench was?" I smirked.

Austin gaped in surprise and Ben shot me a thumbs up.

The class was basically just me doodling since we didn't have any homework to do. We played a quick get to know you game, which Ms. Dahl insisted on.

I learned that the two boys I befriended were huge dorks, so that was fun.

We then had a free period.

The boys decided that I needed to come hang with them and their crew so I did.

Ben took my hand at some point and I let him. It wasn't a big deal to me, he was just quicker than I was so he pulled me along.

We finally arrived at the middle of the stairs where sat three cute girls.

I didn't realize that the boys were running a harem, but that didn't really bother me.

"Sammy, Tha, Lizzie, this is Bailey. Introduce yourselves."

"I'm Sammy, I'm a mess. I also have severe panic disorder so yeah." The brunette laying down on the floor introduced herself.

"Me?" The blonde perched on the railing asked. When Austin nodded, she introduced herself as well. "I'm Samantha, I don't want to be here and people make fun of me for not knowing how to sit properly. I go by Tha or Sa."

The ginger looked over at me and sat up. "I'm Lizzie, I'm a junior which means I'm gonna leave before any of you get to."

"I'm Bailey, I'm new in town and I'll probably raise in social status next year and abandon y'all." I then said since Ben was looking at me pointedly.

Lizzie nodded. "Fair enough honestly. You make it there, feel free to leave us."

Austin then flung himself onto the railing dramatically, almost falling off and dying.

Sammy pulled out a notebook and made a tally mark in it.

"What's that?" I asked, curiously.

"Everytime Austin acts like an idiot and almost dies we tally it up. He gets a new notebook every year." She explained.

I laughed. "That's great."

And it was. Maybe this whole highschool thing wouldn't be so bad after all.

Chapter Text

"Little Swan is flying in today," Louis announced.

I rolled my eyes, he had been talking about this for the past couple weeks. I had no idea why he was so invested but I certainly wasn't.

"Frankly Lou, I don't give a damn. He's your head of police which means you have to listen to all the talk about perfect Isabella Swan. I don't have to."    I sank back into the couch, dreading what he was about to say.

"Fine, fine. It's time for school anyway.  Get your butt up and into your car, or I'll be forced to drive you." He smiled threateningly.

I rolled my eyes again and got off of the couch.

Soon enough I was at school, making cereal in homeroom.

"That's too much milk," Ben announced from next to me.

"You're too much milk," I responded immediately.

"Fucking roasted," Lee smirked from his seat which was currently my lap.

I could see Rosalie Cullen roll her eyes at us so I quickly flipped her off.

She clenched her knuckles but tried to remain composed.

It'd been my job to piss her off ever since she had insulted Lizzie. Lizzie had long graduated but I would still defend her honor.

"Give me the food, mother. I require sustenance," Sammy whined from behind us.

"No she said she would feed me first!" Lee also whined.

I sighed dramatically, "It's hard being a single parent."

"Then don't be," Ben responded.

I turned to look at him with an air of disbelief. "Who'd you suggest I ask out? All the hot ones are taken."

"Incorrect, Angela is very single at the moment," Ben pointed out.

I smirked.

Of course he would point out her. He has had a very obvious crush on her for literally ages. He still hadn't realized it though. Austin and I had taken bets when he would ask her out. Austin was more optimistic, he said prom. I said it would be the day after graduation.

"She's not my type."

"Jessica?" Lee suggested, his mouth full of cereal.

"Oh god," I muttered, "After she outed me to the whole school? I think not."

This continued on for a while until our teacher finally came into the class. "Class is over, proceed to your next one."

My class schedule was much busier than it had been Freshman year.

Instead of free periods, I had challenging classes. It wasn't fair, but neither was life.

I had Homeroom, Government, Calculus, English, Spanish and then I had my first break of the day which was lunch. After lunch I had Biology and Gym.

It was sad though because Ben, my best friend, had a completely different schedule. He had Homeroom, English, Trig, and then his lunch. After lunch he had  Government, Biology, Gym and Spanish.

I barely had any classes with my friends, which always made it hard. I did make sort of friends with new people, but we would never hang out outside that class. Everyone involved knew that.

"See ya mom in English!" Lee hugged me before picking up his backpack and leaving.

Sammy grabbed the cereal. "Come on mother, we don't want to be late for Government."

I followed her out, swinging my backpack onto my shoulder, damaging it further. Like you do. The daily struggle of a student.

The day went by quickly, nothing much exciting happening. The only thing notable was Austin falling down a flight of stairs into Mike. Which was pretty cool, especially since Mike happened to be rambling about if the new girl would like him.

Mike always did this. He was girl crazy. He also knew that no one in Forks at the moment would ever date him. So of course he was holding onto Lil Swan to be the girl of his dreams.

Everyone seemed to think she was going to be perfect and amazing and one of the popular kids.

If she was anything like Charlie, she would not be anything like that. He was almost as much of an awkward dork as my brother was. I think it's a police thing. Or potentially something my brother rubbed off on Charlie from the amount of time they spend together.

"Wanna ditch gym?" Tha asked me as we walked together.

I shrugged. "If you want to."

"I'll ditch if I can come over." Tha bargained.

I agreed and she followed me out to the van.

"Wanna drive?" I asked her, knowing very well that she only had a permit.

She rolled her eyes and extended her arm. "Fuck yeah. Louis isn't home right?"

I tossed the keys to her at a rapid speed, she barely managed to catch them honestly, and got into the passenger side. "Nah, he's in Victoria for the day. He's meeting up with his sister."

"Oh didn't know you had a sister," she remarked as she got in and started the car.

"I don't." I replied simply, trying to keep my mind off of Adelaide. That wasn't important right now.

She started driving, not asking any more questions. "Turn on some tunage?"

I fiddled with the settings on the radio, managing to find a station that plays 90's rap.

We ended up vibing to some Canibus as Tha drove.

She was a better driver than I was, it also helped she had less anxiety and more confidence than I did.

She pulled around my street corner and my heart pounded against my chest.

There was Charlie's police cruiser pulling up at the same time.

"We're screwed. That's fucking Charlie Swan and he's going to bust us for ditching and illegally driving." I muttered to Tha who was turning a shade paler than usual.

"Cool, cool." She parked, sealing us into our fate.

I didn't blame her. Charlie had already locked eyes with us. Driving away would have done nothing.

We got out of the car as Charlie parked his car.

I could easily see that he was glaring at us, and also that Isabella Swan was stepping out of the car too.

"Tell my children I love them," I whispered to Tha as Charlie walked toward us.

She looked down. "Sorry I can't. Neither of us are going to make it."

I was frozen as the two Swans approached. Not in fear though. I was frozen in awe.

No one told me that Isabella Swan would be naturally beautiful. Sure she didn't try at all in her appearance, but she was still really pretty.

God I was too gay for this whole situation.

Luckily she tripped before reaching us so I could tear my eyes away.

Tha rolled her eyes at me and flicked my arm. "Down girl," she muttered.

Before I could retort, Charlie and his daughter had reached us.

"Bailey, Samantha. Remind me what time is it?" He crossed his arm, Isabella looking over at us curiously.

"I don't own a watch, Mr. Swan." I responded quickly, trying not to let my heartbeat accelerate just because there was a cute girl close to me.

"Neither do I," Tha chimed in.

He shook his head in disapproval. "Did you get your license recently Samantha?"

"No sir." She responded simply.

He sighed, obviously tired. "I'll let you both off this time."

We smiled, all of those dinners I had been to with the police squad had finally paid off.

"Thank you sir," I looked at him, accidentally making eye contact with Isabella.

My heart skipped a beat. I rolled my eyes at myself. I was being ridiculous. This whole situation was ridiculous. Just because there was a cute girl did not mean I had to be a mess around her.

This happened every single time.

There was something different about Swan though. She was pretty, but she didn't seem to have the ability to express emotions which was weird. Her expression had remained neutral this entire time. That was sort of creepy honestly.

"Is your brother in, Bailey?"

I shook my head. "He's in Victoria right for a quick day trip, since he had today off."

Charlie scrunched up his face, "Well I was going to invite the both of you out for dinner. I guess it'll just be the four of us then. It'll give you both a chance to get to know Bella here."

I nodded, taking in what he said.

I was too gay for this.

I was totally screwed.

Chapter Text

I awkwardly stood there as it turned out there wouldn't be an escape for me.

"I should get started on my homework," Tha announced, trying not to have to spend an evening with the Swans.

I glared at her. The audacity of pretending to be responsible so she could leave me alone with them. It was a brilliant plan, and if it wasn't directed to hurt me I would have loved it.

"Me too, and isn't it a bit early for dinner?" If she could play the responsible student card to get out of dinner free, I would too.

Charlie looked over at us. "Maybe Bells could stay here and I'd be by in bout two hours to pick you all up for dinner? That way you'd have time to do homework and get to know each other."

Oh no.

I could not be in a room alone with Isabella Swan. I was too gay for this.

I looked over at Tha, hoping she'd save me. She knew I was a homosexual mess. She was my friend, she'd bail me out of this.

"That sounds good sir, unfortunately I really need to get home and study on my laptop. Documents that Bay, doesn't have. Mind giving me a ride?" Samantha the backstabbing disowned friend asked.

I could only stare at her in shock as Charlie agreed and the two of them started walking away.

"Have fun girls," Charlie said as he left, forcing both his daughter and I into a situation that neither of us had consented for.

We faced each other, both uncomfortable and shocked.

No one had expected the police chief to act this way. No one had expected a forced playdate. We were juniors after all, not preschoolers. We got to choose our friends, and it was extremely weird when parents set us up on playdates.

I recovered first and walked towards the door, pulling out my keys. "Coming?"

"Oh yeah sure," she attempted to act cool.

Great. She was adorably awkward and beautiful. Exactly what I needed.

I led the way into my brightly lit house. Lou had left all the lights on again. He said it was to prevent burglaries but all it did was raise our power bills.

She stood in a corner, as if waiting for me to give her permission to sit down.

"Make yourself comfortable, I mean as much as you can be in a stranger's home," I smiled politely at her before throwing my backpack into the hallway.

She sat down, scratching her neck. "I'm Bella, by the way."

"The whole town knows about you, any newcomer gets the same treatment. When I moved here it was the same way. Only you have it worse because Charlie doesn't shut up about you," I laughed slightly, busying myself in the kitchen.

"Oh god," she sighed as she rolled her eyes. "When did you move here? I don't remember you from my summers here."

"Freshmen year, so yeah we haven't met." If I had met her, I would've remembered.

We fell into a silence. And that's when I realized I had forgotten to introduce myself.

"Oh shi..dang. I'm Bailey by the way," I said grabbing myself some guava juice. "Totally forgot how to have a conversation whoops."

She nodded, still remaining expressionless which was weird. "No worries."

That was all she said.

I hated small talk like this, and I hated it more when I had to initiate and lead the conversation which was happening right now. She was either more uncomfortable than I was, or she wasn't interested at all. Either way, she wasn't trying to maintain this conversation at all.

Which was kinda annoying, since we were stuck in this situation and it wasn't my fault.

"So are you starting tomorrow?" I asked as I flung myself onto Lou's recliner.

She nodded. "Um yeah."

This was so awkward I was going to die. "What classes do you have? Like what's your schedule?"

"I haven't gotten my schedule yet, I'm picking it up early tomorrow," she explained.

Strike one.

"Oh that makes sense," I smiled at her, "I forgot all new students had to do that."

Bella nodded. "Yup, I get to start my day by pointing out to everyone that I'm new in school."

I laugher, her sarcasm was evident. "Yeah, I mean you're already going to get ambushed by the unofficial Isabella Swan welcoming committee, sucks that you're getting a target on your back as well."

Her face finally showed some expression as she paled. "Tell me you did not just say welcoming comittee."

I smirked at her,  acting more confident even though my heart was still pounding. "I did.  Most of the guys in school are assembling to win you over. They're hoping one of them will end up with a girlfriend. They do this everytime a new girl shows up."

"Does it work?" Bella subtly fished for information about me.

"There's a very slight chance of it working. They're plenty used to rejection though." I responded, making sure not to come out to her. You never knew how people would react and as she was a guest in my house, I didn't want her to freak out.

I'd let Jessica and Lauren tell Bella, they always told everyone. They always had to make sure everyone knew about Gayley Bailey. For straight girls they were pretty obsessed with my sexuality.

"Thanks for the head up," Bella looked over at me.

"Yeah no problem," I responded, tapping my fingers on my leg. I looked around, for anything to help ease the awkward tension of this conversation.

My eyes landed on the clock. It had only been ten minutes.

"Wanna go somewhere? We have time," I offered.

"Sure?" Bella agreed quickly.

So we loaded up into the van and headed out. Maybe this dinner thing wouldn't be so bad after all.

Chapter Text

I woke up a solid hour early than usual due to being vigorously shook.

"Uh?" I moaned in confusion.

"Up and at em kiddo. We need to have a talk." Louis responded, grabbing my hand and pulling me into a sitting position.

I slumped back over. "You can talk to me here."

"I'll break out the airhorn."

"I'm up, I'm up you don't have to deafen me. Now get out," I sighed. Unfortunately, I wouldn't be resuming my sleep cycle. I would actually have to get up early. Ew.

He left my room and I started on my morning routine.

It took me about twenty minutes before I was ready to walk down the hallway of doom. It worried me that Lou had wanted to talk. The last time we had this talk it was about moving to Washington. I hoped that it wouldn't be about anything like that this time. I had friends here. I had children that depended on me for attention and love. 

I turned the corner into the kitchen, wrinkling my nose in disgust. "Dammit Lou. Coconut oil again?"

"It's healthier for you, you should be grateful." Lou responded, scooping the freshly made tortilla chips into a bag. 

"Look," I sat down on the counter where he wasn't cooking. "I appreciate the food, but you have to know that the smell coconut oil has when it's burning is horrible." 

He rolled his eyes. "Fine, next time I won't make you chips for lunch." 

I sighed and then changed the subject. "Is there anything for breakfast?" 

He sat down, still wearing his ridiculous Santa apron he used year-round. "I just made lunch for you to pack. You can fix yourself something though. I won't stop you, Bay."

I sighed again, louder this time to emphasize my frustration. "There's nothing to eat!" 

"I spent so much money on nothing, you might as well eat it."

"You're not mom, stop pretending to be." I crossed my arms. It annoyed me that he said that. That was our mother's signature catchphrase and he didn't have the right to say it. 

"Shit, I'm sorry," he tried to make eye contact with me. 

I simply got up and pulled the container of mini pancakes out of the freezer. I put the remaining waffles on a paper plate and shoved it into the microwave.  While it was heating up, I poured myself a glass of chocolate milk. 

"How was dinner last night?" Lou tried to strike up a conversation. 

"Fine. It would've been better if you were there. Too bad you were busy." 

He didn't respond to that, simply taking a sip of whatever concoction he had made this morning. 

"Bella's a nice girl. Too bad she'll hate me because I'm a filthy lesbo," I added.

He put down his cup and stood up. "Bailey Diana Spencer! Never say those things again. Do you understand me? Your sexuality doesn't make you filthy or a bad person."

"Louis Oliver Spencer! Then why were you speaking to your sister yesterday? If you don't share beliefs with her, why did you go up and visit her?" I demanded, furiously pulling my mini pancakes out of the microwave not wanting to hear that stupid noise it made. It was so freaking annoying, I hated it with all of my heart.

"She apologized, she doesn't feel that way anymore. She wants to reconnect with you, make things right. You should give her a chance," Louis tried to explain. 

I didn't want to listen to him, so I didn't. I grabbed my lunch bag, swung my backpack onto my shoulder, grabbed my keys, and poured my breakfast into my mouth, almost choking on it. 

I then left, slamming the door shut. Not caring that it was 6 in the morning and school didn't start for another hour. I ran out the door and into my car. I then threw everything in my hands into the passenger seat and drove away. 

I drove straight to the school and just sat in the parking lot. It was empty for about a half-hour and then it started filling in. 

My mind was just going over the argument. I scratched at my skin, wanting to just rip it off. It initially was just because of my frustration that I thought of it, but the more I thought of it the more it intrigued me. I could tear off my skin and let my filthy blood spill everywhere for everyone to see. What a way to go out. Blood spilling everywhere in front of everyone. That'd be a hell of a political statement. 

My mind was just thinking about the news report it would get when there was a knock on my car window. 

I looked up seeing the single Cullen male there. That puzzled me since I had never interacted with him before, but I still rolled down the window. 

"Hello there, mind if I join you?" He asked. 

I looked at him in confusion. "In my car?"

"Yes. If that doesn't bother you." His voice was silky smooth. I could see why every straight girl was obsessed with him. 

"Go for it," I responded, unlocking the car for him to come in and moving my shit to the backseat. I had no idea why this was happening but I supposed it was better than being alone with my masochistic thoughts. 

Cullen got into the car, smiling slightly at me. 

"Why?" I just asked, assuming he could guess in what context I was using it. 

"You seemed rather violent and you were alone. I guess I just wanted to make sure you weren't going to hurt yourself." 

"Am I that easy to read?" I asked jokingly, trying to relax around him. It didn't feel right to let down my guard around him though. I suppose  typically attractive males made me guarded. After all, they were more competition.

"Yes. I'm rather good at reading people though, so don't feel bad." He laughed, a weirdly inhuman sound. 

"You gonna be here long?" I asked. 

"I'll leave as soon as you want me to, or school starts. Whichever happens first I suppose." 

I nodded. "Want some chips? I swear they taste better than they smell." 

He seemed to think this over for a bit and then answered. "I'll try one." 

I pulled out my lunch bag and handed him a chip. 

He grimaced, probably smelling the distinct scent of coconut oil. He then proceeded to eat it. 

"Good?"

"Good. Thank you." He said politely. I could tell he didn't like it. 

"Sure sure. I always try to offer food to random people I barely know who ask to sit in my car." 

"How's that working out for you?" 

"Haven't gotten a girl in here yet, so poorly. Only got one weird dude." I laughed, waiting to see his reaction about that. He probably knew I was a lesbian but it was always safer for me to bring it up and see their reaction. 

He smiled slightly at me. "I'm sure you will eventually find a partner. This would probably make a good way to attract someone." 

He had passed my test, I offered a hand to him. 

"I'm Bailey." 

"Edward." 

I looked over at the clock. "Well since introductions are done, I'm gonna go to class. Mind getting the hell out of my car?" 

"Of course," he gracefully exited and headed back to his own car. It was some sort of silver one with half of his siblings in it. 

"See ya around, don't break into any other girls cars alright? Probably wouldn't make a good way to attract someone," I called over to him. 

Edward  laughed again, shaking his head before getting out of hearing distance. 

I headed into the building, passing by Eric Yorkie who was blabbering on about Isabella Swan being there any minute. 

"She doesn't have homeroom, genius. She's not a nerd," I pat him on the back as I passed. 

Most everyone else I passed was talking about her. 

And that's when I had a realization.

This was how it was going to be all day. I was not ready to deal with this. 

Maybe I stood have just stayed in the parking lot with Cullen. 

Chapter Text

The whole day was filled with people gushing about Bella Swan. 

It was extremely irritating. I got that she was new and people hadn't gotten to meet her before but it really was ridiculous how obsessive everyone got over newcomers. 

I had gotten the fair few remarks the first couple days of being in Forks but it had died down. 

I wasn't sure the whole Isabella thing would die down. 

She was new and everyone was acting like she was an item that they could just collect. Which wasn't true at all, considering she was a person not an object that everyone could gush over. She wasn't something to be won over and collected, she wasn't a prize. But everyone and their clique was scrambling to collect her. 

She was a cool girl, pretty and all, but people were going to be disappointed once they met her. 

Bella wasn't exactly one of the popular girls. 

She just wasn't destined for popularity. 

From what I knew of the little Swan, she was awkwardly cute and would fit in more with the lit crowd rather than the athletes or the fuck boys. 

She was a duckling not a swan. 

Honestly, Bella would be better suited to hanging around with my mess of friends. Sure, most of the boys would crush on her but I was crushing on her and I could still be a good friend to her, that was if I was able to be. Which wouldn't happen. She was a newcomer, a straight newcomer. And the popular crowd would immediately swoop on her and turn her against me and my friends. That always happened. 

Everyone was talking about her in Homeroom, everyone except me and Rosalie Hale who managed to lock eyes in the middle of an eye-roll. The Cullens were probably over this as much as I was, they were never the excitable bunch, excluding of course Alice Cullen who had enough excitement for all of them.

In Government, Sammy interrogated me heavily, having heard from Tha that I went to dinner with her. By the end of it, anyone nearby knew I had a crush on Bella Swan. No one whose opinion I cared about was in that class though, so it really didn't matter. 

Calculus had Lee practically bouncing up and down with excitement, waiting to be able to meet her. He wasn't interested romantically in her but he was the type of person to collect more people to be friends with. 

Angela Weber spoke of her briefly but it was really only to complain about how Eric was freaking out. I had laughed with her about the boys all freaking the fuck out for a couple minutes and that was the nicest interaction. 

Bella was in my Spanish class, and I nodded at her before she got distracted by Jessica who guided her as far away from me as they could get. Not surprising. 

But then it was lunch, and I thought everything would calm down. It did not. 

I walked in, on my own as usual, and started heading over to our little lunch table. We claimed a table the first week that was in a corner, the closest table to the Cullens. It was nice, and definitely a better choice than our last table which was next to a garbage can, the amount of trash we had thrown at us was even more than one would think.

However, before I could make it over there I was stopped by the slightly rough but pleasant voice of Bella. 

"Bailey! Do you want to sit with us? I mean you don't have to if you don't want to uh, you can sit wherever," her awkwardness was definitely increasing each time I met her. 

Cute. 

I offered her a smile, ignoring the rest of the table since she was sitting with the popular kids, no surprise there, "I have a table already with some of my friends. You're welcome to join us though. We don't bite unlike some of these folks." 

"Oh. Okay. Um, thanks for the offer, I'm fine here though," her face fell a bit. 

She probably wanted some normalcy in her day instead of the high energy fakeness of the cool kids. 

Jessica smirked at me, placing a hand on Bella's shoulder, "It's okay Bella, Bailey doesn't exactly interact with a lot of people. See she's got this mental illness, so we all just try and give her some distance." 

Calling me mentally ill instead of just straight up calling me a slur. 

Interesting style. 

She was still a bitch though. 

"Liking girls isn't a mental illness Jessica. The only way someone could be mentally ill based off of sexuality is if they were attracted to you. See ya Swan," I flipped Jess off, just for good measure before walking the rest of the way to the table. 

Sammy wrapped an arm around me as soon as I sat down, "Well at least you don't have to worry about when Little Swan's going to find out? Problem solved." 

"Yup," I agreed, not really feeling it though. 

This was the end of my budding friendship with Bella I was sure. 

No one wanted to keep the lesbian around, especially when she was obviously head over heels for you. 

That would be weird, disgusting even. 

Anyone could see I liked Bella a lot, who didn't, but it didn't matter. She was with the popular kids. It was only time before everything I liked about her changed into Jessica or worse...the other one. 

We didn't speak her name or even think it, it would summon her from the depths of hell and her nasally voice would be upon us complaining once again. 

I was tired of the popular kids. Popularity didn't have to make you a bad person, just look at Angela. She hung around with the popular kids and was one of the sweetest people in this highschool. Or even Eric could be an example, he was annoying as hell but he was a good person. 

But no, some chose to use their popularity for evil. To torment the one gay kid in this school and all of my friends. 

I was done with this. The temptation from this morning washed over me again. 

It would be a fun political statement just tearing open my arm and covering those girls with my filthy mentally ill blood. I didn't like pain and didn't want to hurt myself but it would be worth it. Just to see what they did and to make a point cause if my blood was truly filthy, we would all see wouldn't we?

Almost as soon as I had that thought, Rosalie Hale started heading over to us. 

Weird. 

She never approached us. 

What was with Cullens approaching as soon as I had that thought? It had happened earlier as well. 

Coincidence or were they a bunch of mind readers?

That was ridiculous, over active imagination over here. 

If the Cullens were cool enough to have telepathic powers, they certainly wouldn't be in a boring town like Forks, unless they of course, were on the run from the government/mob like most of my classmates theorized. 

Rosalie stopped in front of us. 

I stared into her beautiful golden hypnotic eyes in a way that I was sure screamed  menacingly. 

Sammy elbowed me. 

Okay maybe I wasn't menacing, wasn't my fault Cullen girls were so pretty. There were a lot of pretty girls in Forks, it wasn't fair. Absolutely ridiculous. Can't believe this crap. Pretty straight girls were the absolute worst. Unfair. 

I wished someone was gay in this fricking town. 

"Hello," Rosalie spoke, her voice musical and light and just perfection. 

Sammy narrowed her eyes, "What are you doing here?"

"Yeah!" Lee chimed in with his support. 

I didn't speak, dealing with my minor gay panic. 

My eyes caught some motion and I could've sworn Edward Cullen was laughing. 

I wonder what he found so hilarious, maybe the fact that his sister was actually interacting with us. 

Rosalie's expression remained neutral, "I was wondering if you might accept my apologies for what I said to your friend Elizabeth a few years ago. I realized I never formally apologized for those remarks and would like to do so to now." 

This was getting stranger and stranger. 

The scenario absolutely bewildered me. 

Rosalie never apologized, never talked to us, only engaged in fights with Lizzy and that was her whole interaction with our friend group. 

Why would she apologize now? 

This was distracting. 

It seemed like an attempt to distract me from my thoughts but whose attempt?

Maybe God I guess if she really did exist. 

Interesting. 

This day kept on getting better and better. 

Chapter Text

The week passed pretty normally with me hanging out with my friends by day and by night flopping onto the couch like a dead fish and bitching to my brother. As it usually did during the school year. 

Edward Cullen had been gone for most of it, he had come back yesterday, and while he was gone you could notice Bella visibly deflating. 

She had a crush. 

It wasn't a bad guy to have a crush on, we had had one interaction but he hadn't been an asshole and he said he liked my chips even though we both knew he didn't so that pegged him as alright in my book. 

Not to mention Charlie had a lot of respect for the Cullens which in turn made Lou have a lot of respect for the Cullens which made me have a healthy amount of respect for them. They hadn't wronged me and they deserved better than the rumors. Practically anyone deserved better than the rumors. The fact that the whole town whispered about Mrs. Cullens inability to have children was really fucked up. 

I didn't know if it were true or not but either way it was so stupid that people kept on whispering about it. They had been here the same amount of time I had and we were both stuck with rumors circulating us. 

Must have been a good year for gossip or something. 

My first week I had gotten so many people asking why I lived with my brother, or about my supposed sister, or about any of that. And that had pissed me off. I can't imagine what it would be like for the Cullen kids who got whispers of incest and miscarriage. 

If my mother was still alive and I had moved to a new town where people were constantly talking about my mother not being able to conceive, I would had beaten the shit out of them. 

Lou pulled me out of my reflection by dropping the jug of orange juice. 

I stared at the orange splatter on the ground before looking back at him, "What the fuck Louis?"

"It's cold outside," he announced as if that solved everything. 

I rolled my eyes, "Do not excuse your clumsiness on cold weather. We both know your wrist doesn't drop things every time it gets cold. There is statistical evidence. Face it, you're becoming more like Charlie everyday."

"Chief is a good man. There would be nothing wrong with being more like him," Louis protested. 

He knew the point I was trying to make but okay. 

I smirked, "There is if you're dropping the goddamn orange juice Lou." 

"I'll clean this up. Oh the roads are icier today than usual, be careful. If you want me to drive you, I can real quick," he offered, knowing about my driving anxiety.

I shook my head, "I'll pass. You need to go to work. I can clean up your mess real quick before I head over, I was planning on ditching homeroom today anyway."

"You shouldn't ditch," he started to lecture. 

I cut him off with a scoff, "Okay how many classes did you ditch when you were my age? Don't lie to me. I remember." 

"You were 5, 5 year olds don't remember those things Bay," he sighed. 

I shook my head again, "I was 8 excuse you, jerk."

"Yeah yeah whatever," he darted off to the back room. 

I got started cleaning the mess, I didn't want to but anything to keep me from going to homeroom. If I had to hear Eric Yorkie talk about Bella one more time I was going to lose it. Lose what? My knife in his chest. 

Louis darted back in, clean uniform this time, "Love ya kid, stay out of trouble. Call me if you need anything, Harry's invited me over for dinner tonight, you're on your own for that."

"Alright, have fun at work," I called out. 

He nodded, heading out the door, "Be safe on those roads!"

I would be of course. 

I was the overly cautious type of driver, I would be safe. 

Now it was just the issue of if everyone else would be. Most people were though.

You didn't live in a place where it got real cold real fast without knowing how to drive. 

I managed to find a parking spot and got out of my car. Just as a couple people were arriving. 

Bella was parking, some other cars were pulling up, much less recognizable than Bella's old truck.

Before I could walk to school, there was suddenly a van where Bella's truck was. 

I blinked, everyone started screaming. 

Car accident. 

Someone had lost control. 

Bella was getting out of her car, she was where the van was now. 

Shit. 

There was no way she would be okay. 

No fucking way. 

I ran towards the scene, yelling in an authoritative voice, "Everyone stand back, someone call 911, do not touch anyone. Just leave a space for the ambulance to come." 

Having a police officer for a brother helped a lot in this situation. 

People mostly listened to me, Angela started calling 911 while I dialed a different number. 

He picked up instantly, "Bailey?"

"Louis, there's been a car accident. Bella was involved, I don't know if she's okay but you're gonna need to get Charlie down to the hospital. Try to keep him calm, I'm checking on her now," I announced, moving to the scene of the accident. 

Louis hung up, presumably already moving to talk to Charlie. He was quick about that kind of thing. Always springing into action. 

There were a few things I noticed as I stepped to view. 

First of all, a gap between the van and the truck. 

Second of all, Edward Cullen who had definitely not been there before was bracing against the van, the gap was the exact length of his arms. 

Third of all, Bella was alive, conscious, breathing and not noticeably bleeding. 

Thank fuck. 

Edward dropped his arms immediately, staring at me. 

I stared at him, "EMT's should be here soon. Are you both okay?"

I didn't bother asking about how he got there or ya know stopped a van with his brute strength. I would mind his business, and he would mind his and we would get along. Wouldn't be the first weird thing to happen in Forks. 

Bella nodded, "I'm fine. I don't need to go to the hospital." 

"You're going to the hospital. Both of you. You nearly died, there is no chance you're not going to the hospital. Also, Chief is aware of what happened and probably already at the hospital," I switched my stare to her. 

Bella groaned, "You told Charlie?"

"No, Louis told Charlie. When people get hit by vans, I'm calling the closest police officer to me and asking him to inform the victim's father of what happened. Plus he would have heard anyway. It's a small town, you nearly died," I rolled my eyes. 

This girl. 

I couldn't believe she would be concerned about her father caring about her when she nearly died. 

Priorities. 

I heard the tell tale signs of an ambulance and left the two of them there. 

Everyone was still freaking out. 

Except for the Cullens who were just staring at Edward from far across the parking lot. 

It was a shocking day for all apparently, and it was only 8 am. 

Lovely. 

Chapter Text

Louis hadn't taken Charlie to the hospital. He had brought him here instead. 

While Bella was refusing to go on a stretcher and Edward and I were insisting she go on a stretcher cause she probably had a concussion or something, I could see Lou pull up. 

Charlie scrambled out of the car, running towards his daughter, "Bella!"

"I'm completely fine Char-Dad," she sighed,"there's nothing wrong with me."

Which was exactly what a concussed person would say. 

Bella got loaded into the ambulance, Charlie was talking with the EMTs, and Louis rushed over to me. 

"Are you okay?" He asked, as if I was the one hit with a car. 

I shrugged. 

"I know car accidents aren't exactly fun for you," my brother remarked. 

I rolled my eyes, "Louis. I'm fine. I appreciate it. No one died this time. I'm fine, no deaths no harm. I'm riding with Little Swan."

With that I got into the back of the ambulance, nodding at the two EMTs who didn't bother telling me to get out. 

Edward rode in the front. 

"I can't believe you're making me do this. You both suck," Bella hissed at us. 

I rolled my eyes while Edward simply laughed. 

Sure she seemed fine but car accidents were car accidents. You went to the hospital when you almost get hit by a car. Who knows, Cullen could have knocked her over when he magically appeared next to her. I didn't know how teleportation worked but he said she had hit her head and I trusted him. It was his teleportation and super strength after all. 

He was staring at me. For too long, his expression unreadable. 

Edward was really weird sometimes. Every time I interacted with him, he had stared way too long. He knew that was weird right? Maybe not. He wasn't exactly the most social person, maybe he didn't know social cues, maybe no one had told him about the weird social rules. 

I should stop judging him, it wasn't his fault if he stared too long. 

I glanced over at Bella, "Little Swan, I don't think you realize what happened. You could have died. You look okay but we need to make sure of that. You almost got hit by a car, people get hurt or killed from getting hit by a car."

Maybe it just hit a little too close to home having lost my mother due to a car careening towards her on a field of ice but there was no way Bella would be winning this argument. I cared about Bella Swan, I knew I shouldn't cause crushes on pretty straight girls never went well but I did and there was no chance she would be dying or suffering on my watch. 

Edward twisted around, placing a cold hand on my shoulder, "She's right." 

Interesting. He didn't seem like a touchy feely person.

"Again. You both suck," Bella muttered, slightly less bitter in tone. 

We both laughed again and Edward removed his hand from me. 

Charlie was right, the Cullens were chill as hell and deserved more love and less hate. 

Even if they maybe were on drugs and/or had teleportation powers. 

I honestly hoped no one else had noticed that Edward wasn't there and suddenly was. They didn't deserve more rumors. He was an alright guy and everyone in the school, even some from my own friend group, whispered about him. I wasn't going to mention this, I just hope no one else did. The Cullen family deserved better. 

We got to the hospital pretty quick, thanks to it being an ambulance with a police escort courtesy of my brother and Charlie. 

Once we got there, I started heading to the waiting room. 

Edward stopped me, "Thank you."

Huh?

"For what?" I scrunched up my brows in confusion. 

He stared at me for a moment, "Everything. Especially helping me get Bella here."

Ah.

Our shared genuine concern for her well being and safety. 

"Of course. Little Swan means everything to me. Thank you," I responded. 

He would know what I was thanking him for. 

It was fairly obvious. 

I was thinking him for saving her life but not going to mention that outloud. 

He nodded, "Of course. Bella means everything to me." 

With that, he headed into the back and I headed to the front. 

Charlie was freaking out. 

I placed a hand on his shoulder, "Don't worry Chief, Bella should be okay. She was looking well and fought me and Edward the entire ride here. The only thing we're concerned about is her maybe hitting her head but there was no blood or anything so if she did hit her head, it wasn't that hard."

"Thanks for the information," Charlie said gruffly, which was his standard way of speaking. 

Louis wrapped an arm around me, "Do you want one of us to stay with you Chief? I should probably go to the station, but I know Bailey doesn't particularly want to go back to school with this excitement so she could stay here if you wanted company." 

"I wouldn't mind staying here, I'm awfully concerned about what happened. It was three of my classmates, I'm not that close with Tyler but I definitely consider Edward and Bella my friends," I chimed in. 

It was more of a ploy to try and stay and comfort Charlie, who was basically a father figure in my life at this point, than anything else but it was true. I would consider them to be my friends. Weird friends I didn't talk to and wasn't really going to every talk to for an extended period of my life probably, but still. They were friends. In some capacity at least. 

Charlie glanced at me, "Go on home Bailey. Maybe you can come over for dinner tonight if Bella's feeling up to it." 

"Okay," I nodded. 

Lou got up and started heading out the door, pulling me forward, "Let me know if you need anything Chief and keep us updated on how she's doing!"

We headed out of there and I got into his car. 

"Are you okay?" He asked again, like he hadn't already asked this. 

I don't know what he was expecting. I wasn't going to have a mental breakdown and cry just cause this was too fucking similar to how our mother had died. I was fine. I wasn't associating this with my mother's death. I wasn't focusing on the fact that Bella could have died if Cullen didn't have super powers. I definitely wasn't focusing on the fact that everyone I cared about either died or left me and Bella could have been both today. I wasn't focusing on that at all. I would never. I was fine. Definitely fine. 100% okay. 

It took me a moment to realize I was crying.

Why was I crying?

I shouldn't cry. 

I hadn't gotten in a car accident. It was okay, no one had died. 

No one had died, it was okay. 

I shouldn't be this concerned about Bella Swan, she didn't even like me. She probably hated me cause I was gay, at least she hadn't talked to me since that revelation until she was telling me I sucked. 

I should hate her, I should hate everyone in this fucking school. Everyone who cut me out of friend groups or their lives cause I was gay. 

But here I was with feelings for Isabella Fucking Swan and it was stupid. 

I was in love with a straight girl who wasn't even friends with me. Like I said earlier, she meant everything to me. And that was stupid, so stupid. 

I hated that. 

"It's okay, breathe. No one died, it's okay. All of your friends are still alive," he whispered, gently massaging my shoulder as he spoke until they began to relax. 

I shook my head, "It's not okay Louis. I hate this town." 

"Are you upset at me for moving here? You know we had to, I thought you really liked your friends here," he glanced at me concerned. 

I shook my head, "I like my friends but everyone else hates me. I'll never be more than that gay kid here." 

"We can move, if you want," he offered quietly. 

I stared at him. 

He loved Forks more than anything. He had gotten a job here as a police officer and been promoted so rapidly that he was practically right under the chief. Lou had so many friends, he was constantly going over to people's houses whether it was other police officers or people on the res or just ordinary people in Forks. Everyone loved him and that was strange for a newcomer, it didn't happen often. 

I shook my head again, "We're not leaving."

"No?" He asked cautiously, starting to drive away. 

"This is home," I answered him. 

The rest of the drive to the house was silent. 

My minivan was parked outside of our house which was weird as I distinctly remembered leaving it at school. 

"Your friends are great, I can't believe they brought the decrepit old thing home," Louis remarked, heading inside.

I glanced inside my car, grabbed my keys that I had somehow left inside of it and looked around. 

A note. 

It just read "Be careful" in handwriting I didn't recognize. 

What the fuck.

Chapter Text

I didn't go over to the Swan's house that night. I didn't go anywhere for about a week. 

It turns out that people assumed right when they assumed I would be out of commission as soon as a car accident happened. Which was stupid. I hated proving people right, my energy was so much better suited to acts of spite. 

But things hurt and apparently, trauma acted up even when you thought you were past it. 

Which was bullshit and not cool. 

0/10 would not recommend. 

Once I stopped moping in my house, aka Louis dropped me off at school and told me that I needed to talk to my friends, and after my friends calmed down, we fell into a pattern.

There was always something nice about a pattern. Once you could get to a monotonous routine in a semester, it was freeing. The fact that my body moved automatically thrilled me. I had properly formed the habit for the semester. 

It was simple. Wake up late, make breakfast in homeroom, ignore Rosalie Hale staring at me, exchange doodles with Sammy, make it through the rest of my classes, go to lunch, avoid walking past Jessica's table, make weekend plans with my friends, ignore Alice Cullen staring at me, go to my other two classes for the day, ignore Edward Cullen staring at me, get in my van, take whoever home, cook with Louis, avoid the topic of anything triggering, and go to bed. 

It was weird how much attention I was getting from the Cullens lately. It wasn't that much from Rosalie or Edward,the latter often joining me in longingly looking at Bella whenever she wasn't looking cause we both had it bad, which was weird but honestly it was solidarity. We both were heads over heels for Swan, only she didn't talk to me much, and he avoided her whenever he could, which I wasn't sure how that was a flirting strategy but he was trying. 

If there were such things as disaster straights, he would be one. Another thing we had in common, not knowing how to talk to girls we were interested in. 

So there wasn't really that many stares to deal with from those two. 

But Alice? Alice was constantly staring at me, not in an obviously malicious way but in a way that made me feel as if I was about to die at any moment and she was just waiting for it to happen. For one of the cutest women I had ever seen, she certainly made me feel uneasy.  

Even though she stared, none of the Cullens approached me. They weren't ignoring me like they were Bella, it was just back to the usual not interacting with people in Forks, which was understandable. 

If I had to deal with all those rumors, which I'm pretty sure I got a fresh wave of rumors starting after missing a week of school, I wouldn't really want to interact with people either. 

But at least I had my friends. 

My friends who were currently at my house, gushing about the ladies choice dance coming up. 

"I want to ask Angela," Ben complained, lying across my bed dramatically. 

Lizzie raised an eyebrow, "Did I miss something? Did you come out as female?"

"I'm still a guy," he responded. 

She narrowed her eyes, "Then you can't ask anyone genius, it's ladies choice, not men awkwardly try to pretend that it's not ladies choice and suggestively make comments until the woman feels obligated to ask him. You'll have to wait for her to ask you, which do you know what would help with that?"

"Ooh, I know! I know!" Lee waved his arm wildly, almost hitting Tha, whose lap he was sitting in, in the face. 

Tha ducked, rolling her eyes with a grin. 

"Pick me! Pick me!" I waved my arm in a similar fashion, making sure not to hit Sammy who was currently in my lap. 

Lizzie grinned, "Bailey darling? What is the answer?"

"Actually talking to Angela!" I called out, putting my hand down. 

Lizzie nodded, "Ding ding ding, we have a winner!"

"I liked it better when we didn't see you at all," Ben muttered. 

He promptly got hit in the face by one of my pillows, one of the girls had thrown it. I wasn't sure who but I stepped in before they could wreck all of my possessions anymore. 

I held a hand up, "Easy there."

"Lizzie's mean but you're a hypocrite Bailey. You're like oh talk to girls and when's the last time you even interacted with Bella?" Ben crossed his arms, disappointed at me for stopping him. 

Sammy grinned, "He's not wrong."

"Or what about the fact that you have two of the prettiest girls in the school staring at you and you haven't done anything about it?" Lee pointed out. 

It was better sitting at home for a week depressed than dealing with this crap. I was honestly tired of it at this point. 

The eldest in the room grinned, "Bella? As in Little Swan?"

"It's not like that," I muttered.

Ben nodded, mockingly, "Yeah, she's just obsessed with Bella and her and Edward won't stop staring at her whenever she looks away. But ya know, it's not like that."

"How do you even know that? You don't have any classes with me," I groaned, knowing very well that the focus on teasing Ben about Angela had fully turned to me. 

He winked, "I have my ways."

Sammy's head automatically tilted down in false shame. 

I knew it. 

"Why don't you ask Bella to the dance?" Lizzie asked, as if that was easy. 

I rolled my eyes, "Why doesn't Ben have one conversation with Angela?"

"This isn't about me," Ben crossed his arms. 

Lee smirked, "Everything is always about you."

A pillow smacked him in the face, shutting him up. 

"Little Swan is a nice enough girl from what I've heard," Lizzie tried again, cautiously. 

I nodded, "She's kind but with personality. She hardly ever uses it though but when she does, it really shines out."

My friends exchanged knowing looks.

"Shut it," I muttered. 

Lizzie walked over to me before sitting down next to me and Sammy and wrapping us up in a hug, "Darling it's okay to have feelings. Ask her out tomorrow, it's probably going to be a big day for asks. If she says no she says no and that's okay. And if she says anything homophobic, I won't hesitate to get into a fist fight with a minor."

"Don't you dare lay a hand on Little Swan," I stared at her. 

She grinned, "And you don't have feelings for this girl, huh?"

"No, no it's not like that," Sammy grinned as well. 

I rolled my eyes. 

The front door slammed, signifying that Louis was home. 

"Brother dearest! Come kick some delinquents out of your home, they're being mean to me!" I called out. 

A pillow smacked me in the face. 

Chapter Text

I wasn't the only one planning on asking Bella to the dance. 

Not that I was really planning to. I wanted to but there was underlying anxiety. Everything in me told me not to ask a straight girl to a dance. But I wanted to go to the dance and there was no chance in hell I was going to ask a boy that I wasn't friends with and most of the girls I wasn't friends with were homophobic.

My friends had pretty much found dates. 

Tha had asked Lee, obviously. They were pretty much together at this point, even though no one ever said anything about it. 

June Richardson had asked Austin, which had come out of nowhere but it oddly worked. 

Sammy had asked Rob Sawyer cause "he seemed like someone who would stand up for her". 

And then Ben was waiting for Angela to ask him but if she didn't, Katie would 100% snatch him up. 

It was weird. 

Katie and Angela seemed to be circling around Ben and Eric waiting for the other one to make the first move. I didn't have anything against the cute redhead sophomore but I honestly wished that Angela would choose Ben instead of Eric. Otherwise, Ben was going to mope the whole time. 

But I doubted she would. After all, Ben barely interacted with her. 

So since my friends all had dates, there wasn't much I could do besides that. 

I could ask one of the Cullens but the only available one whose partner wouldn't kill me was Edward and we were sort of friends but I didn't think we were that kind of friends that went to dances together. I had a sneaking suspicion that he was going to ask Bella as well. 

It seemed all of the guys were going to ask Bella, which wasn't how this worked but whatever. 

I knew of at least 3 that were going to and I hoped that me asking wasn't going to make her pissed at me. 

Maybe I could ask first. Mike would probably ask her during biology. 

So I needed to ask her before biology, which would be lunch. 

Sammy practically threw me toward the popular table and then ran off. 

It was now or never and my friend had decided it was now. 

Oh fuck, oh god, oh shit. I was not ready for this.

It would be fine. 

She would say no probably but she most likely wouldn't call me a d*ke or anything so that was something. 

"Hey Swan, can I talk to you for a moment?" I asked casually, as if my heart wasn't panicking in my chest. 

Most of the eyes at the table turned towards me and a couple pairs that I had a suspicion I knew the owners of did as well. I was being watched. Everyone knew what I was doing. 

Oh god, oh shit, oh fuck. 

Bella nodded and followed me outside, "Thanks for the interruption. Mike and Jess aren't talking right now so it's so awkward sitting there. What's up?"

I couldn't do this. 

There was no way I could do this. 

I needed to do this. 

I could not. 

"So I assume you know there's a dance happening. I was wondering if maybe you would want to go with me? If you haven't already agreed to go with someone else or were planning on asking someone else," I awkwardly rubbed my neck. 

Her eyes widened in surprise. 

Clearly she wasn't expecting that. 

Her look changed from surprise to guilt. 

Ah. 

She was about to turn me down. 

Bella shook her head, "Sorry. I really don't do dances. Honestly, if it was any other function I would go to you but I hate school dances with a burning passion. I'm not planning on attending at all."

Oh. 

Huh. 

That wasn't too bad.

She might be lying to me to let me down easily but that was okay. At least she wasn't being mean about rejecting me. 

"No worries," I grinned, "Good luck in your classes with turning all the boys down. I don't think they'll understand hating school events."

Her eyes widened again, "Turning who down?"

"Well...I know Mike and Eric are planning to ask you. I've heard rumors of other boys as well. Have fun with that," I smirked. 

She sighed, "Oh god."

"God can't help you now Isabella," I laughed at her reaction.

She walked away shaking her head in dread. 

I stayed outside for a moment. 

People would probably think that she rejected me cause I was a girl or a lesbian or something like that. I didn't want to deal with everyone thinking I had just got humiliated. That would be annoying as hell. 

I hoped that she didn't tell anyone I had asked her. That would be the best case scenario. 

But that wasn't likely to happen, plus I hadn't mentioned not talking about it to her. She probably wouldn't even think about that. 

A presence interrupted my thoughts as Alice Cullen walked over to me. 

I hadn't interacted with her before besides noticing her staring at me but she was grinning as if we were long friends. 

"Hello!" Her voice was more upbeat than I had remembered. 

I offered her a small smile, "Hey."

"Bailey, right? My brother has told me all about you!" She leaned against the wall next to me. 

My heart fluttered a moment as she got closer before going back to its usual pace. 

She was someone I didn't really know and her prettiness made me a bit nervous if I was being perfectly honest. Pretty girls intimidated me.

I nodded, "That's me. I didn't think Edward had much to say about me but okay."

"He's said enough. Would you like to go with me to the dance? Purely platonic of course. I noticed you didn't have a date and my usual date to things doesn't really want to go to this. Jazz doesn't particularly like crowds of people and I figured I would let him skip this one in favor of prom. Didn't want to push him or anything! But yeah, I was thinking we could go as friends. I'm a pretty good dancer and we could go dress shopping together and getting matching dresses beforehand as well!" Her enthusiasm was overwhelming. 

Huh. 

Going to the dance with another girl? 

As friends?

That would be kind of nice. I knew any guy I asked would think I was suddenly straight for him and most girls would turn me down so they didn't seem like a lesbian. But Alice? She was confident in her relationship and willing to be friends with me. 

It was very unexpected but I appreciated it. 

I appreciated it a lot. 

The Cullens were alright, more than alright. They were chill, good people like the police force believed. 

I nodded, "Sure. I would love to go as friends. When do you want to go shopping and where?"

"Next Sunday. How about Olympia? They have decent shops there," Alice suggested, tilting her head slightly. 

I shook my head, "I don't go to Olympia. Ever. Sunday works though."

"Any other places you won't go?" She asks, casually prying into my personal business. 

I shrugged, "Nah. It's just Olympia really."

"Then Seattle it is. It's a bit further drive but we can leave in the morning, shop the afternoon, have dinner there and then come home before curfew. I'll pick you up at 9 am sharp on Sunday!" With that she headed back inside, not leaving room for me to question that. 

I guess I was hanging out Sunday at 9 am with Alice. 

What a weird turn of events. 

Chapter Text

The next few days were back to normal. 

Except instead of Alice randomly staring at me, she would smile at me and wave occasionally. 

I usually waved back. 

My friends all freaked out about it but I got them under control even though I was kinda freaking out about it myself. 

I was going to a dance with Alice Cullen, we were starting to become actual friends, it was a weird turn of events. A welcome turn of events though. It was always nice to expand the friend group. I wasn't a big people person but I liked having different sorts of friends to go to. Alice seemed like a good person and her fashion sense was impeccable while mine was not bad but could be better. Going dress shopping with her might actually mean I have a good dress for once. 

Either way I was looking forward to it. 

The rest of the week went by in a blur and I found myself in Lee's mom's minivan.

Lee had picked up me, Tha, and Austin before the entire group met at Mike's dad's shop to assemble fully into the groups going up to La Push. I didn't particularly plan on going to La Push but when Tha arrives at your house, you go with her. It's just common knowledge. She's not as bad as Sammy but still. Any sane person listened to her, and I considered myself sane. 

"We're late. I told you we were going to be late. Everyone's already here," Lee grumbled as he pulled up to the store and parked. 

Tha rolled her eyes, "They didn't leave us calm down, and even if they did we could make it there anyways."

"I see Ben!" Austin chimed in, wriggling out of his seatbelt and exiting the car to run over to Ben. 

I grinned and followed. 

Ben was standing next to Eric, Tyler, and Conner. Directly across from them were Jessica, Angela, Lauren, Katie, June, and some girl I had forgotten the name of. 

It was weird. They were divided into groups facing each other like this was some sort of middle school dance and they were too afraid to talk to each other. 

Bella and Mike were next to the car. 

No Cullens. 

Unfortunate. 

No one probably invited them, I should have invited Alice and her boyfriend, or I would have if I had actually received warning that this was going to happen. 

Little Swan stared at me, I nodded at her in acknowledgment. She didn't make any moves to join our car, she had probably agreed to ride with Mike already. 

"We're all here, let's get divided up!" Mike announced way too loudly like it wasn't early on a Saturday morning. 

Lee opened his door, "We can take 3 more legally."

"Shotgun!" Conner called. 

Lee rolled his eyes, "Samantha is already in the shotgun seat." 

A few mumbled protests later and arguing over seats, we left for La Push. 

We had Katie and Conner in the middle row and then me, Ben, and Austin were squeezed into the back row. It wasn't the most comfortable situation but we all had seatbelts so it worked out. 

The rest of the group was squeezed into Mike's car in a very not legal fashion. I'm sure they were having a rough time. 

Luckily the drive down wasn't that long. I napped the entire trip, leaning on Ben who initially complained but shut up rather quickly and accepted his fate. He had expected this, having been one of my closest friends for so long. People either needed to eat or sleep and I hadn't had my usual mini pancakes so a quick nap it was. 

Austin elbowed me once we got to the parking lot. 

I glared at him but said nothing, choosing to unfortunately wake up and get out of the car as soon as we parked. 

We had gotten there before the other group so we had a few minutes to wait and stretch our legs. 

"I haven't been here in so long," I remarked with a yawn.

Ben nodded, "Same."

"Wasn't the last time last summer? When Lizzie pushed me into one of those tide pools?" Austin wrapped an arm around Ben. 

I smirked, "Yeah. Yeah it was. That was the best moment of my life seeing you fall into a tide pool."

"I agree. It was elegant, glorious, beautiful even," Ben laughed. 

Austin removed his arm from around Ben, "You're all jerks."

"Jerks wow? Such a strong word," Tha stepped out of the car, smirking as well. 

Lee leaned against his mom's car, something that if any of us had done we would have gotten yelled at for, "Does your mommy let you use such strong language?"

"Jerks. The lot of you," Austin hissed, crossing his arms. 

It was at this point Mike and his gang showed up. 

Ben and Yorkie immediately ran to the beach, gathering supplies for a fire. 

Mike led the way for the rest of us who weren't running towards a beach in search of something to satisfy our pyromaniac tendencies. 

I managed to walk next to Bella, ignoring the grins from Lee and Tha as I did so. 

She was in a good mood this morning, a smile on her usually hard to read face. Her thoughts were obviously focused on the beauty of the beach itself, she hadn't even noticed that she was walking next to me but it was okay. It was nice seeing her really happy and if that meant she was focusing more on the breathtaking view than us, that was totally okay by me. 

Once we got there, I took a seat next to the fire and watched the construction. 

"That's not a good shape. You're building a home for the fire to live, I would not live in this. 0/10 realtors would not recommend this home," I quipped, immediately getting hit by a stick for my advice. 

Eric rolled his eyes, "I know how to make a fire Spencer."

"Debatable," I shrugged. 

He crossed his arms, "I will fight you."

"Sure you will," I got hit by another stick, "See if you stopped throwing sticks and made a home out of this we'd actually have fire."

"Bailey stop provoking Eric so he can help me with this," Ben lectured, a smile still on his face. 

Soon enough the fire was going. 

While Mike showed Bella cool fire tricks, I harassed Austin about the tide pools. It was on him for bringing this up, I wouldn't have thought about it until he mentioned it but now it was fair game to poke fun at. 

"The question isn't is someone going to throw Austin into a tidal pool, it's who is going to do that. And I would like to nominate myself," Tha offered. 

Lee nodded, "The hike would be nice to do right now, there's a lot of nice places to see."

"We're hiking? Where?" Connor interrupted, joining the conversation.

I explained, "Up to the tide pools."

"Oh a group is going to the tide pools? I'm down,"  Mike chimed in. 

Soon enough, everyone was deciding if they were going or not, dividing into groups yet again. 

Our group was a lot different than the earlier one. 

We had Mike leading followed by Jessica, then Lee, Tha, Austin, Ben, Angela, and Bella. 

I kept pace with Angela and Little Swan, Ben was going to as well but Austin made him walk with him for protection. Austin was oblivious, or maybe just scared of Tha's threat. 

"Have you been on this hike before?" I asked, conversationally. 

Bella seemed surprised that I was talking to her for a moment before answering, "Once or twice when I was really little. Charlie took me out here when I was like 7 or something."

"Did fetus Bella enjoy them?" I kept my eyes ahead so as not to trip but glanced over at her every little bit, just to make sure she was still there. 

She nodded, "I loved them as a kid. It was one of the only things I actually liked about Forks. No offense or anything."

"I didn't take offense, I've barely lived here," I grinned, "You should be saying no offense to the Forks native."

Bella switched her stare to Angela who was in front of us, "No offense Angela then."

"Full offense taken," Angela's voice was cold. 

Bella looked down her voice quiet, "Sorry."

"How dare you not take a liking to the exciting things we have in Forks such as..." Angela trailed off. 

I laughed, "Or the..."

"Don't forget to see the..." Angela added. 

Bella rolled her eyes, but with a small smile, "Don't do that to me again. I thought I pissed you off or something."

"Yeah good one Weber! Didn't realize you had it in you to be perfectly honest," I grinned. 

Angela turned around, did a mock bow and continued walking. 

I was beginning to like this girl. She was actually pretty chill. 

Bella turned to me again, "Where did you move from?"

"Nevada," I responded shortly, not really wanting her to ask me more questions. More questions meant that she would ask the one question I didn't want to answer.

She did not take the hint, "Why did you move?"

"Louis wanted to be a cop and big cities are too dangerous. He could have gotten killed by now if he was a cop in a big city. That wouldn't have been ideal for me. So we compromised and moved to a small town where he could follow his dreams. Not to mention Forks is pretty safe which would mean he would be okay with me being alone most of the time," I shrugged, answering it partly. 

Angela asked a question since it was apparently interrogate the gay hours, "Why do you live with your brother?"

"Because there's mutual hatred between my sister and me," I responded casually, again partly answering the question. 

I didn't understand the curiosity. People didn't really care that much when I moved here but since Bella was asking, suddenly it was time to know everything about me. It was weird. 

Bella fell silent after that but Angela kept on prying. 

She glanced back at me, "Aren't there other options?"

"My parents are dead, I wasn't going into foster care as a teenager and there's no way my other siblings are okay enough to take care of me. It was Lou or my sister and I chose Lou. He's a good enough cook and doesn't hate me so it works out," I shrugged. 

I sped up to join Austin and Ben at this point, not wanting more questions or sympathy. I didn't need girls to act like they cared about me just because my parents were dead when we all knew that they were going to ditch me as soon as Monday rolled around again. Guilt at interrogation wasn't going to change that.

Ben leaped across a pool gracefully, showing off for Angela. 

Tha and I started chasing Austin around, all three of us giggling. 

Lee and Mike were also participating in the jumping around thing, making it seem more cultlike every second. 

The other girls just sat there, watching. 

Austin paused as he saw us approaching and held up his hands, "Don't move!"

We stopped. 

Ben was behind him, a pool before him. 

This could work. 

I put my hands up, gesturing for Tha to mimic. 

Austin relaxed as we did so, only to fall into the nearest tidal pool as Ben pushed him. 

Most of us cheered, even Mike and Jessica joining in the celebration. 

Everything felt okay again as if the weight of the questions had been lifted off my shoulders. 

This day might actually be fun again. 

Chapter Text

We hung up around there until we had pushed Austin into a yet another tide pool and started getting hungry. 

I hung back again with Bella as we hurried back down to get to the food. 

After the second time she fell, I just grabbed her hand and held onto it, making sure she didn't fall again. 

She glanced at me awkwardly but didn't remove her hand.

Austin noticed and grinned and I resolved to push him into another tide pool soon. Apparently, the lesson from the first two had worn off. That could be fixed easily.

It was clear to see our group had been added to once we got down there. There were about 8 other teenagers that had joined the group, I recognized some of them.

Sandwiches were already being made so I let go of Bella and darted over to the food, Austin and Ben rushing alongside me to get there. 

Eric introduced each of us as we passed by. 

Once I got my sandwich, I sat down next to Ben who very obviously sat next to Angela. 

Mike delivered sandwiches to Angela and Bella and I sighed. Apparently, I wasn't part of the sandwich delivery club. 

The oldest from the rez group introduced all of them, "I'm Sam, this is Jared, Embry, Quill, Jessica, Seth, Leah, and Jacob." 

We nodded at each other in greeting. 

Embry Call locked eyes with me and gestured for me to join him and his friends on the other side of the fire. 

I shook my head and finished eating where I was sitting. I knew better than to take a plate of food over to a known thief. 

People started dividing into group again, as was the nature of today's trip. 

Soon enough there was really only Lauren, Tyler, Bella, Embry and most of his friends, and me left on the beach. 

Ben had abandoned me as soon as Angela had decided to hike again.

Austin had darted up to the shops to avoid being pushed into any body of water, he did in fact have a few braincells on him after all. 

Lee and Tha? They were somewhere that no one knew where probably doing unspeakable things. Not that either of them would stay quiet if they actually did such acts, I just didn't want them to speak of it. 

Heterosexual relations interested me not. 

Once people had divided, Embry gestured at me to come over again. 

I rolled my eyes and made another sandwich, "What do you want?"

"I was just wondering who let cop girl out and about," he grinned. 

People were staring at us but I didn't particularly care. 

I stared at him, "I guess the same person who let a known juvenile delinquent roam freely."

"Cop girl's got an attitude. Better watch out Em," Quill laughed. 

I grinned in response, "Em? Is that a prison nickname?"

"You take me for a ride again and I'll tell you," Embry smirked. 

Lauren spoke in her usual nasally tone, "You know Bailey's a lesbian, right?" 

Great. 

Perfect. 

Loved that. 

That was totally necessary.

One of the rez girls stared at me, the first time she had looked at anyone in this whole time. 

"Lauren hun, it wasn't that kind of ride. It was a ride in my brother's police car to the station where he got booked. Nothing as exciting as you're hoping for," I shrugged, not showing that the fact that she had to out me to everyone at all times bothered me. 

Quill laughed again, "Good job Em, you hit on the one white chick you have zero chance with."

"I don't know about that," Jacob Black chimed in, "I don't think he has any chance with the straight white girls either."

I got up, having finished my second sandwich, threw away the plate, and started heading down to the sand, kicking off my shoes on the way there. 

The youngest of the group called out, "Wait! I wanna hear about how Embry got arrested!"

"Come along then kid," I grinned, not stopping my path to the water's edge. 

He caught up to me quickly, the remaining rez girl following him as well. 

I raised an eyebrow at her in a silent question. 

"I'm not letting my kid brother start adoring Embry and I'm not sure you'd properly roast Call to the point that Seth here would stop worshiping him," she explained. 

I nodded, stepping into the water, "Makes sense. I'm Bailey Spencer by the way, in case you didn't hear the announcement." 

We all knew that I wasn't talking about Eric's introduction.

"Leah Clearwater, this is my brother Seth," she crossed her arms, not following me into the water.

Harry's, one of the older men that had basically adopted Lou as their son, actual kids.

Interesting. 

Seth bounced up and down, following me into the water like an excited puppy, "Your brother's a police officer?"

"Yup and I've been a witness to a lot of crimes because of it. My sophomore year he started driving around the police car to pick me up from school. You would not believe the amount of dumb teenagers that would commit minor crimes right after school or during last period," I started my story. 

Seth locked eyes with me, obviously fascinated. 

I glanced over at Leah, she was watching as well, not as obvious but still interested in the story. 

"Embry was one of those dumbass teenagers," I grinned.

Seth's eyes widened, 

Leah rolled her eyes, a small smile on her face as she did so, "Don't curse in front of the damn kid."

"Noted," I smiled at her. 

She was easy to be happy around. A nice person. 

She immediately looked away, "I should get heading back. Seth come on, Mom wants us to help her with dinner."

It wasn't even that late. She felt uncomfortable around me. 

Probably cause of the whole lesbian thing. 

Lauren, ruining every afternoon since 1987. It was her brand, it made sense she would stick with it.

"Get Quill to tell you the story, he's not a liar like Embry is," my smile had turned to fake and she had probably noticed it, the kid was oblivious. 

Seth was mostly just upset, "I wanted to hear it from you though!"

Leah dragged him off without another word to me. 

Seth waved to me, still complaining as he was dragged off. 

I stayed where I was until they were out of view and then walked back to the fire. 

Then I waited. 

I didn't have long to wait before we started packing up since a storm was brewing. 

Ben tried to talk to me on the way back but after truly looking at me, he knew I was upset so he stopped. 

I was silent the way home, rolling out of Lee's car when we finally got to my house with a brief "thanks" and that was it. 

Louis wasn't home so I just went to my room. Today hadn't been a great day. 

Chapter Text

"You're up early and dressed! Impressive," Louis remarked, gracefully flipping a banana pancake

I applauded before taking a seat at the table, "Nice flip. I'm going to Seattle today, my friend should be here in about ten minutes."

"Which friend?" He asked casually. 

I grabbed 2 of the pancakes off of the cooling plate before answering, "Alice."

"Alice...I don't believe I've had the privilege of meeting an Alice before. Is she a new friend? Or a new more than friend?" Louis grinned, still making pancakes as he pried into my personal life. 

I rolled my eyes, "Alice has a boyfriend that she is very committed to. We're going to the dance as friends so we're getting dresses today in Seattle."

"Why don't you just go to Port Angeles? They have nice enough dresses for a small town dance," I could tell without looking at him that his brow was all scrunched up. 

I grinned, "Alice has standards. It was either Olympia or Seattle." 

As soon as that word came out of my mouth I knew it was a mistake. Rule number one, don't mention anything that could be used to bring up any of our siblings. Olympia was where our one sister lived which meant as soon as I had said that, Lou would try to bring her up. 

Ugh. 

"You should have gone to Olympia! I'm sure Adelaide knows all the best dress shops there," he glanced over at me. 

I stared at him, not bothering to respond to that. 

He turned back to breakfast. 

I stared at the clock. As soon as it flipped over to 9 o'clock, there was a knock on the door. 

Impressive timing.

I jogged over to the door, opening it. 

Alice grinned, "Good morning! Are you ready to go?"

"Let me just grab my bag real quick. Come on in," I waved her into the house and then walked back into the kitchen. 

She followed me, probably not wanting to just stand awkwardly in the doorway and wait for me to return. Not that she would be awkward anywhere. I think it might actually be impossible for her to ever be awkward. 

Louis smiled at her as she entered, "Alice I presume? I'm Louis, Bailey's favorite brother."

"Least favorite," I muttered. 

Alice beamed at him as if she was a pure ray of sunlight sent from the heavens to entrance everyone she met, "Pleasure to meet you officer! I've heard good things about the work you do for the community!"

"Finally a friend of Bailey's that treats me with respect. How refreshing," his tongue poked at as he teased me. 

I rolled my eyes grabbing my bag, "My other friends don't respect you because they actually know you. Anyway, we're gonna get going."

"Rude. I'll be at Billy's with the boys again, I'm going to be back late. Do you have your keys?" Louis asked.

I nodded, "Say hi to Harry's kids for me if you see them. We're leaving now."

"You kids be safe," Lou smirked.

I rolled my eyes, grabbed Alice's hand and left the house before my brother could say anything else. 

Her hand was cold to the touch and she was surprisingly hard to drag along but that didn't really surprise me. 

Some people just ran cold and she seemed to have a stubborn spirit. Those with a stubborn spirit, even if they were under 5 foot, were still hard to move. 

"He seems nice!" Alice remarked before continuing, "Is it okay if my brother Edward comes with us? He wanted to come so I told him it was okay, but if it isn't I can drop him off back at home rather easily." 

I glanced at the silver car she had brought. Sure enough there was Edward Cullen. He waved at me. 

I waved back, "Sure he can come if he wants."

"Great!" She led the way to the car and got in the backseat right behind her brother. 

I sat on the other side of the backseat and buckled up, "Hey."

"Hey," Edward responded, a small smile on his usually stone face. 

It was a little weird that he was here but I didn't particularly mind. Hr was chill at least and probably wouldn't make it that awkward. 

"Thanks for letting me come," he started driving, "I'm going up next weekend with a friend and I haven't been up for a while. I wanted to...scope out the area one might say."

Alice winked at me, "He's going on a date with Bella."

Oh.

Huh. 

Cullen had game after all. I thought he was ignoring her but I guess not. Maybe the ignoring until someone liked you tactic actually worked. 

Weird. 

"It's not a date. Bella had plans to go up to Seattle and I offered to drive her knowing that her decrepit excuse of a truck wouldn't make it up there," Edward explained, obviously having said this before. 

I nodded with a serious face, "Totally a date."

"Definitely," Alice smirked. 

Edward groaned, "I'm having regrets."

"You offered to chaperone this trip, it's going to be this bad the whole way up and the whole way back," I smirked as well.

It was an hour of mindless chatter before Alice, like everyone this weekend, decided to go into the prying questions. 

"Louis said that he was your favorite brother, how many siblings do you have?" Alice's head tilted in an adorable way that meant it was very hard for me to be annoyed at her for asking. 

I shrugged, "Beats me. At least 3 brothers and 2 sisters that I know of."

I left the answer vague on purpose, I didn't want to get into my life story with anyone. It wasn't a big deal and it really had no relevancy to my current life so I didn't see why everyone was asking. 

If people wanted to ask about my life, they should have when I first moved here. But people didn't talk to me except for my one friend group because I wasn't that interesting and then I was outed so everyone who wasn't securely in my friend group at that point just avoided me completely. No one got to act as if they were interested in me now, not after living in the same town as them for two years without them asking a single question. 

"Big family then! Looks like we have that in common," she grinned. 

I nodded, "You could say that again." 

She laughed in response, a musical sound that made everything better. It made me feel more relaxed, less annoyed. 

Huh. 

The Cullens were weird. 

Chill but weird. 

Chapter Text

Shopping with Alice wasn't as easy as I thought it was going to be and it certainly wasn't for the faint at heart.

She practically carried me through the dress shop we arrived to, she may be under 5 foot but she was definitely strong as hell. Also, she knew what she was doing so I let her drag me. 

"We can also get your prom gown now so that whoever you go with has ample time to match. I'll pick that out as well. Come on! I see something that absolutely is calling to me," she pulled me along, not letting me get a protest in. 

Not that I was going to protest. I honestly liked shopping with her, she knew what she was doing. 

It was obvious that I would be leaving her in a damn good dress so who was I to argue with her? 

She led me to a silver dress that I barely had time to look at before she handed me a size 8 and gestured to the changing room.

"I'll be waiting!" Alice called out as I followed her direction. 

I shook my head with a smile, that was impressive how quickly she had found something she liked. 

Once I was in the changing room and that door was locked I took a moment to look over what she had handed me. 

A silver dress, one of those one shoulder ones. It was a cold silver with a lot of glittery flowers all over it and a pretty high leg slit. 

It wasn't something I would have chosen but it looked cute and again I had no room to argue.

I reluctantly got dressed, not a big fan of changing rooms and trying on clothes in general, but at least the process was relatively simple. The dress slipped on easily, fitting perfectly.

Huh.

Cullen had skills. I hadn't even told her my size and in a few seconds she had figured out the perfect dress for me, which this admittedly was. 

It felt comfortable and shone like nothing I had ever seen before. I didn't think sparkles could be mesmerizing like this but they were. 

I stepped out of the changing room and twirled for Alice with a grin, "Whaddya think? Am I going to be the belle of the ball?"

"No," she paused, studying my face,which most certainly fell for a moment, before smirking, "We're going to be the belles of the ball."

I rolled my eyes, "Jerk."

"Hmm? What was that? Thank you Alice for finding the perfect gown? Why you're welcome Bailey anytime," her smirk only grew. 

With a sigh and the grin still on my face I retreated into the changing room to get back into my normal clothes. 

"I found the perfect gown to go with yours, I'll be trying it on. Wait where I was for me!" She called out. 

I called back, "Will do!"

It was easy getting out of the dress which was always a good sign. I hadn't really went to dances before but any semi-formal to formal function left people really tired and I doubted I wanted something I couldn't rip off later and easily collapse into bed. This dance wasn't going to go as hard as prom, nothing went as hard as prom, but comfort still mattered. 

I sat down on the empty seat outside the changing room, only waiting a moment before Alice emerged. 

She had gone with a dark blue dress of the same style just opposite sides. The leg slit and the shoulder were on different sides than mine. Also, there wasn't any flowery designs on it, instead it was glittery all over in a not that demanding way. It was still very beautiful. 

"I love it," I offered. 

She nodded, "I knew you would! It works quite well with yours."

With that she disappeared into the changing room again and in record time emerged, cradling her dress. 

Alice held out her hand.

I raised an eyebrow.

"Hand me your dress. I'll go pay for these while you go next door to pick out the shoes we'll be wearing. I trust you with that. Heels for us both, you can pull them off with your height," she informed me. 

I stared at her. 

She was going to pay for the dress?

No way. That was a lot of money to spend on a person. 

"I'm not letting you pay for it," I shook my head to emphasize my point. 

She tilted her head slightly, "Am I not your friend?"

Classic guilt trip. 

"You are but friends don't spend that much money on other friends," I glanced down. 

"Well Bailey Spencer, obviously you don't know the first thing about being friends with me. When I invite you shopping, I pay. It's the person that invites the other person that gets to pay. I invited you here, I am funding this trip. Now hand over the dress," she stared at me, her golden eyes reaching into my very soul, telling me that I was in danger if I didn't do as she said.

There was something about her without a smile that just made me very scared. Probably because when upbeat people didn't act upbeat it was usually a bad sign. I doubted there was anything else happening. My instincts were just used to happy short people being dangerous when they were no longer happy probably. 

I handed her the dress muttering, "Fine. I'll get you next time."

"You can make up for it when you drive me to the dance. You're picking me up by the way," she grinned again, "Now go pick out the shoes."

The shoes were easy to pick out, two pairs of 3 inch strappy heels that had a pretty good support system so that the wearer wouldn't easily twist an ankle. 

It would make me extremely tall, almost 6 foot, but Alice said I could pull it off so I could probably pull it off. Us getting the same size heels meant that the height difference would stay the same which would be fun. The giant lesbian going with the tiny straight girl. 

Those shoes got Alice's approval and soon enough we were back in the car. 

"Got what you needed?" Edward asked, he hadn't gone into any of the dress stores just staying in the car the whole time. 

I nodded, "Alice is a goddess when it comes to fashion. It's impressive."

It wasn't even an exaggeration. I was pretty damn impressed with her skill. 

"Bay you are so sweet! Can I call you Bay?" Alice asked. 

I shrugged, "Go for it." 

Nicknames weren't really a big factor in my personal life, my friends usually called me some nickname but I didn't really care about it. It wasn't like either of the Samanthas who would literally run you over with a car if you called them Samantha to their faces. It just didn't matter to me, I wasn't invested in any name really. 

"Don't encourage her, you don't have to put up with her excitement at home," Edward smirked. 

Alice pouted, "Emmett is now my favorite brother."

"No he's not," he rolled his eyes, still smirking. 

I raised an eyebrow, "Emmett's your muscular sibling yeah?"

"I think we're all pretty fit, but yes he's the biggest out of us," Edward answered. 

Alice grinned, "You should meet him! He may be intimidating but he's a total sweetheart!"

Ah. 

A himbo. 

"Maybe I should," I offered her a smile in return. 

She nodded, excitement growing on her face, "You should come over!"

"Why don't we talk about this later? We should go find some touristy things to do, or maybe lunch?" Edward interrupted. 

I could go for lunch, I was pretty hungry which meant that Alice was probably starving with how much energy she expended at the store. 

"I nodded, "Lunch it is."

Chapter Text

Maybe I just didn't have a good sleep schedule but I didn't understand the appeal of morning weekend plans. 

The idea of waking up and then immediately going over to a friend's house just wasn't appealing to me. The more time I had to wake up, the better company I was. But here I was 10 am on a Saturday, driving out to the Cullen house to pick up Alice and take her back to my house so we could get ready and hang out before the dance. 

There had been plenty of jokes about how they were really outsiders since they lived outside of Forks but I definitely wasn't prepared for how outside Forks they lived. Alice had given me directions and I had followed them, but still. 

This whole scenario felt very sketchy and that feeling only increased as I got farther into the middle of nowhere. 

After a long curving driveway I finally saw the house. 

It was beautiful. A giant mostly white house with so many windows, there were windows practically everywhere. The whole thing screamed modern and airy and I was in love with it. 

It was also probably worth millions of dollars which explained why Alice was so quick to buy the dress for me, it was nothing to her if her family was this rich. I knew they had money but I didn't think they had that much money.

Crazy. 

Alice was there waiting for me outside, leaning against the house. 

As soon as I parked and got out of the car, she grabbed my hand and started dragging me inside.

"Come in! I'll introduce you to the family," she requested as if she was not already taking me inside to meet her family whether I liked it or not. 

I didn't mind though. The inside of the house should be just as pretty as the outside and I was looking forward to seeing it. 

I had never been a big house decorating person but there was something about this house that was just dazzling perfection. It was breathtaking. 

The inside of it looked like the outside of it, very expensive, very beautiful, very open. 

It was interesting. I didn't think houses like this existed outside of California but I suppose houses like that could exist anywhere if there were rich people to make them. 

Alice led me to a living room with four people in it. 

The guys were all on the couch, Alice's brothers and her boyfriend, and then there was a very beautiful woman standing next to the couch. 

"Rosalie and my father are in town right now, but I'll introduce you to everyone else. You know Edward already, the one next to him is Emmett and the handsome one is the love of my life Jasper. And that is our darling mother Esme," Alice gestured to each person as she introduced them. 

I waved casually. 

The boys waved back at me in unison, all of them wearing smirking as they did so. 

Slightly creepy but okay. 

Sibling goals I guess. 

Esme stepped forward, "It's a pleasure to meet you Bailey. I was so glad to hear that you're taking Alice today, she desperately wanted to go to the dance and I'm glad she found someone as lovely as you to go with."

That took me off guard, she was really motherly and sweet. I liked her a lot, she made me feel at ease. 

Definitely the coolest Cullen. 

"Thanks. I'm glad I can go with her too, we're going to be absolutely iconic at the dance tonight and I can't wait," I responded, offering her a smile. 

She smiled back, not in a creepy way like the boys had done. 

Edward laughed slightly. 

I turned to him with a smile. "Heard you were going out with Bella officially. Congrats on that," A pause as my smile faded away and I stared at him, "If you hurt her in any way shape or form I will beat you up to the point that you won't be able to move ever again. Okay?"

I'm sure that he had already gotten this threat from Charlie if not the entire police force of Forks but still. Didn't hurt to add to it. 

I didn't think he'd actually hurt her, he was a pretty chill guy, but still. 

I would do it for any of my friends, and I did it for most of them so he had to put up with it too. 

"You have my word I won't hurt her," Edward smiled slightly at me, obviously amused. 

Emmett laughed, a much louder booming sound than Edward's had been, "I don't think you could take down Edward though, you don't look very strong."

Ouch. 

I could definitely take down the twink that was Edward Cullen, I wouldn't say that but like I definitely could. 

"Never doubt the strength of an angry gay," I smirked. 

Emmett laughed again, "I like her! She's got spunk! Good choice Alice!"

Edward crossed his arms, upset about something, I wasn't sure what. 

It wasn't like I had called him a twink to his face so he wouldn't be able to be mad about that. It was probably unrelated to me being here. 

"Yes. Yes it was. Well you've met everyone, we best be on our way," Alice guided me back outside of the house. 

Jasper called out before we left, "Take care of my girl for me!" His voice was rich with a strong Texan accent. That was unexpected. 

"I will!" I called back.

With that we made it back to the old minivan and we got in. 

I started driving back to my house. 

"What did you think of my family?" Alice tilted her head slightly as she asked in standard Alice fashion. 

I shrugged, "They seem pretty nice."

"They are. They aren't always the best with people though," she explained, "I hope you don't mind me dragging you in to meet them. Bella is set to meet the whole family tomorrow and I wanted them to practice. You're easier to be around than Bella, more of a comfortable person. We haven't had people over in ages so that whole encounter served two purposes, for you to meet the family and then for them to remember how to act around people."

That was weird that they needed to practice. 

Well, I mean Edward did seem to stare a lot and so did most of them so they probably weren't good with social cues. That would be sense then. If they couldn't interpret social cues properly they would appear awkward. I guess Bella could be awkward and so if they were awkward as well it would just not be a good time. 

It was flattering that she considered me easy to be around and a comfortable person. That was always good to hear from your dance date. 

I raised an eyebrow, "Really? They didn't seem like they had any awkwardness at all."

"They're getting better I suppose. It must be my good extroverted influence rubbing off on them," she grinned. 

I nodded, "So you're the extroverted one of the family?"

"Emmett, Esme, and I are. They can both come off really strong in social situations though. Esme forgets to not mother every single person she meets, a side effect of adopting so many kids I think. I come off strong as well but I'm the best at making new friend as Emmett is usually trying to make Rose feel comfortable in whatever situation we're in," she explained. 

It was interesting seeing the family from this point of view. Maybe they just got off on the wrong foot with people because of their weird social behavior. Or the fact that most of them were introverts and socially awkward introverts tended to not do well in social situations. 

It honestly made sense. The people of Forks were quick to judge so they had probably just gotten the wrong assumption about them. 

It made me feel bad about the Cullens, they honestly deserved so much better than the rumors that they were a weird cult that separated kids from their families and forced them into their lifestyle until they had forgotten about their pasts. 

"Your family is really nice," I remarked. 

Alice practically beamed at that, her voice quiet, "Thank you. No one really ever says that about us."

"Well they don't know you. People judge newcomers without even bothering to learn about them and I don't really know anything about you or your family but y'all are nice. No matter what anyone else says," I said, hoping I wasn't coming off too strong. 

She glanced down before looking at me again, "Bailey Spencer you are a wonder."

"The only wonder I am is that Wonder Pets duckling," I remarked, deflecting whatever the hell that meant coming from her. 

She raised an eyebrow, "What?"

"You know. The duckling from the one ad about a kids tv show coming next year called Wonder Pets. It's been stuck in my head for ages," I explained. 

She shook her head slightly, a smile on her face, "You truly are a wonder."

Chapter Text

After a lot of experimenting with makeup and hairstyle, Alice had insisted on giving me what she referred to as a "smokey eye" which I hadn't heard of before but it looked nice so it worked, and a couple rounds of Mario Kart later it was finally time for the rest of my friends to arrive. 

Lee was picking up most of the friend group and taking them in his van. 

June was driving Austin and Ben and his date had gotten a ride from Mike and Jessica. It wasn't that surprising that Ben was getting a ride from Mike, he was the closest to the popular group out of all of us, it was only surprising that Austin wasn't going with his. June asking him and offering to drive him had both come out from the blue. Honestly, she had just come out of the blue. 

No one had expected her. 

But it was okay, Austin liked her and felt comfortable around her so it worked out. 

The squealing tires of Lee's mom's van arrived in my driveway. 

"Five bucks says that it's Sammy who runs in here," I remarked casually, grabbing my bag for when whoever burst into my house did so. 

Alice nodded, "You're on. I bet it's your friend Samantha, she goes by Tha yes?"

"Yup. Don't call her Samantha or she'll fight you," I grinned. 

She matched my smile, "Spirit is always a good thing to have."

My door opened, signifying that one of my friends with a key had entered. Tha didn't have a house key anymore, which meant that I was right. 

"Bay! Come on, Lee's waiting in the car. We still have to pick up Sammy," Tha called out before rounding the corner, her eyes widening as she took in the sight of us. 

Alice smirked, "Told you."

What the hell. 

Impressive. 

I made a mental note not to bet against Alice again, she had mad skills.

"You look great!" I grinned at Tha before handing my date the money I had wagered. 

Alice took it from me and directed her smile at Tha as well, "I love your dress!"

"Thanks! You both look otherworldly. Definitely too pretty to be human. Did you do Bay's makeup?" Tha asked, raising an eyebrow as we headed outside. 

I locked the house, "Are you implying that I don't have the skills to do this on my own?"

"Yes. Obviously," Tha nodded.

I rolled my eyes, still with a smile, "Ouch. You're right though. Alice did do it and she did a damn good job of it." 

"I've never seen anything like it," Tha remarked. 

Alice tilted her head slightly, "Do you want me to teach you the technique I use? I picked it up from my cousin in Alaska."

"I'd love that. You have family in Alaska?" Tha started the interrogation process. 

My date nodded, "I do. I have 5 cousins up in Alaska. We used to live up there with them."

We all got into the car as they kept up a conversation. 

Lee spoke to me while the girls were deep in their conversations, "I'd be very surprised if you don't get a girlfriend tonight. All of the lesbians will be giving you their phone numbers, the questioning girls will be madly in love with you, and you'll have every straight girl questioning. What a glow up."

"And I'll have every straight guy mad that they can't have me," I rolled my eyes, "You say this every time I dress up."

Lee shrugged, "I speak the truth."

"Just wait till you see her at prom. Every girl will be lining up just to talk to her," Alice winked, apparently having paid attention to two conversations at once. 

Lee raised an eyebrow, "Oh really? What's the prom plan?"

"Yeah what's the prom plan?" I asked. 

She hadn't filled me in on anything really. I had the dress she picked out for me but it was in a garment bag that she told me not to look at and I had a weird feeling that she would know if I looked at it so I didn't have a clue what I was even wearing. 

Which didn't matter cause I didn't even have a date for prom. Figuring all of that out would happen later. 

We had two months till prom. Plenty of time. 

Alice smirked, "Wouldn't you like to know?"

"Can I know?" Tha chimed in. 

Alice turned to look at her, "Only if you promise not to say a word to Bailey."

"Deal!" She quickly agreed. 

I crossed my arms, "Y'all are dicks." 

"You are what you eat," Tha shrugged. 

Lee and I groaned in unison. Alice simply raised an eyebrow in confusion for a moment before realization hit her and she grinned as well. 

This was going to be an interesting dance to say the least. 

Chapter Text

I was planning on going to bed early. 

Yesterday had been the dance, it was a lot of fun Alice really was the best dance partner a girl could ask for, and I hadn't gotten home till about 1 am since Sammy insisted on stopping at Austin's home to steal his secret supply of goldfish while he wasn't home, aka what we call taking advantage of an opportunity. Then I spent a couple hours telling everything that happened to Lou, which meant we both went to bed around 4 am. 

The plan was we both go to bed at 9 pm tonight but instead Louis got a call at 8:50.

Louis was shaking as he got off the phone, "Little Swan's gone. Bella just left, got in a huge fight with Charlie, and started driving."

"Is Chief okay?" I raised an eyebrow. 

Lou shook his head, "I've never heard him sound so upset. It threw me off."

Ah. That explained the shaking. 

He was upset that his friend was upset. 

I mean Chief Swan kept a pretty level head about everything, he didn't seem to really mind much. So to hear him upset? That would throw anyone off. 

"I'll drive you over there. You're in no state to drive," I ordered. 

He nodded, walking out to the minivan and getting in the passenger side. 

I locked the house up before getting in the car and pulling away. 

It was an easy enough drive to the Swan house where I didn't really have to pay that much attention. 

Charlie and Louis were really good friends, I had been over to his house plenty of times because of it. Weirdly enough, I had been over there less times when his daughter my age actually was living there. 

I guess she wasn't living there anymore. That was so weird. 

It seemed like such a weird move for her to run away. She had a nice life here, plenty of friends, a boyfriend, and a father that loved her. It didn't make sense that she could just leave. 

Was she okay? 

Did she run away with Edward? 

Did she run away from Edward? 

I felt like it had something to do with her boyfriend. If it did, I was going to beat the shit out of him. 

If he hurt Bella enough to make her hurt her dad so much by leaving, I would personally make sure his heart stopped beating. 

Once we arrived at the Swan house, Louis ran up to the door and unlocked it, heading inside. 

I wasn't aware he had a key. 

Huh. 

I quickly followed after locking the car. 

"Louis," Charlie stared at my brother for a moment before giving me a nod of recognition, "Bailey."

I nodded as well before settling onto his couch, "Lou wasn't in a fit position to drive, sorry for intruding."

"Are you okay Louis?" Charlie asked as if he wasn't the one with red rimmed eyes and tear streaks all over his face. 

Lou nodded, "Just worried about you. What happened with her?"

"Bells hates me and Forks. I thought I was a good parent to her but I guess not. She hates living here so much that she left late at night and I don't think she realized it but when she left she said the same damn thing that Renee said to me. I guess I'm as bad a father as I was a husband," Charlie muttered. 

Ouch. 

Bella had really hurt him. Did she realize that she broke her father's heart tonight or did she really just have to leave so bad?

I still didn't understand why she left. She really cared about Edward and her friends here and her father. 

I really hoped it wasn't cause Edward broke her heart, cause if he had hurt her that bad I swear. 

It probably wasn't related to him. He was a friend of mine, he wouldn't hurt her. 

It was something unrelated. 

My brother moved closer to him before wrapping him in a hug, "You're not a bad father and you weren't a bad husband. People just move apart from each other sometimes. I'm sure Bella didn't leave because of you. She probably just got overwhelmed with living in a new town and internalized things until she blew up at the first person she interacted with. You're a great father and an even better person." 

It suddenly dawned on me that this was a personal conversation and I was intruding on a friend bonding moment. Realizing that, I quickly rolled off the couch and wandered into the kitchen to raid Charlie's snacks while Lou and Chief talked about things. 

They didn't have a lot of junk food or really any available, which was slightly disappointing. Everything in their house was meal prep stuff, stuff that you had to cook. 

If Bella came back i would seriously have to talk to her about the benefits of snack food and I didn't want to think about how awful it would be if she didn't/ 

I wasn't just saying that cause I liked her. A lot of people liked her a lot in Forks. It would devastate them, not to mention how obvious it was that it would hurt Charlie even more than he was already hurting. 

It wasn't fair that she could just leave and treat him like this. 

Not everyone had fathers that they could abandon whenever they wanted. Not everyone had the choice to push a parent away. Not everyone was privileged enough to be able to hurt their family members whenever they felt like it cause they had a home they could go back to. 

Okay that was a bit unreasonable. I needed to calm down. 

I rummaged through their fridge before pulling out a gallon of milk. 

The next step was to locate a glass. 

Why did everyone have to have a different house setup? I just wanted one consistent cabinet for glasses. That way I wouldn't be rummaging through every cabinet in the Swan residence at 10 pm trying to find something that I could pour milk into. 

I was really close to just drinking the entire gallon for lack of glass when I finally stumbled upon that cabinet. 

It was, of course, the last cabinet I checked. 

Louis found me an hour later sitting at the kitchen table, nursing my third glass of milk like I was a calcium deficient alcoholic just wanting to drink these sorrows away. Not that I really had sorrows, they were more conflict or angry issues than sorrows. 

"Charlie's in bed, I'm going to join him and stay the night here. You're welcome to the couch or you can drive yourself home," Louis whispered casually. 

I raised an eyebrow. 

He was going to join him?

Oh, join him by going to bed as well. 

My mind went other places that it should not have. That would be weird, why was I even thinking of that? 

They were both straight cops, I needed some sleep. 

"I'll drive home. Do you want me to pick you up tomorrow?" I offered. 

Lou shook his head, "Dunno how long I'll be staying. Charlie needs a friend right now."

"I get that. You're a good friend to him," I remarked, downing my last glass of milk and putting the glass in the sink. 

Lou looked down, "I try. Drive safe, don't have anyone over at night. Curfew rules still apply."

"Aye aye," with that I headed out the door and back into the car. 

I wasn't the biggest fan of driving alone at night but it was better than sleeping on the Swan's couch.

Home sweet home after all. 

Chapter Text

Two days later, I found myself in a hospital.

Bella Swan had "fallen" and hurt herself to the point that she was bruised, cut up to shreds, and needing oxygen and blood transplants. Totally normal things for fallen down a couple flights of stairs.

Charlie had immediately flocked to her hospital, playing that good father role that I definitely wasn't jealous of, that would be weird, why would I possibly be jealous of him being fatherly?

Louis had refused to leave the Chief's side since he stayed the night. He had not come home until he picked me up to take me to the hospital.

Which I had to insist upon.

There was no way in hell I was going to let him go alone with Charlie in such a situation, even if that meant I was going to be a third wheel.

Which I wasn't because that was a weird headspace I was in and not an actual situation happening, god I wish I could stop thinking of Charlie and Louis being gay for each other. It was so fucking weird.

So here I was.

Instead of school, I was walking into a hospital, waiting to see someone I didn't particularly want to see.

Charlie had given a physical description of her as a warning before taking us to the hospital.

I had said it would be fine seeing her, you know, like a liar.

There was no way in hell I wanted to see her, but I wanted to see her more than anything.

Assess the damage, make sure she was okay.

I wanted to talk to her. Alone.

Get her side of the story.

See if she had really fallen.

Because the fact that Edward had been there at the scene of the accident was making my stomach turn like it never had before.

As we walked into the hospital room, a woman flung herself into Charlie's arms, sobbing.

Louis stiffened and I squeezed his hand in support.

He must be concerned that the Chief would cry. That had to be it. He just didn't want to see his friend upset. That made sense.

"Renee," Charlie said stiffly, patting the crying woman's back in comfort.

That must be Bella's mom.

This made sense.

Renee responded into his shoulder, her words entirely incomprehensible.

As Charlie worked on calming her down, my eyes scanned the room.

Plain hospital walls.

A corpse attached to wires and machinery.

Not a corpse.

Bella.

She was breathing but god if she didn't look like absolute shit. There were so many bruises.

That was hard to see.

Acid burned the back of my throat as I swallowed down the nausea seeing her like this induced.

Fun.

Past Bella, there was a waiting room chair with an unmoving figure in it. 

Edward.

Looking impeccable as usual.

Why was he here?

To finish the job of hurting her?

How dare he come here.

His black eyes met mine.

I narrowed my eyes at him, letting go of Lou's hand, "Show me to the cafeteria, Cullen?"

"Bay," Louis said as a warning. 

I tried to relax my posture a little bit, "You want something?"

He was not going to change my mind or actions on this at all, and he knew it.

"Coffees all around I think," he responded, shaking his head slightly.

I was going to kill Edward Cullen for laying a hand on his girlfriend. And my darling cop brother had just given me permission to.

Perfect.

Cullen stood up, "I can manage that."

He walked out of the room, slowly, way slower than a normal person walked. 

Perhaps the teleportation he did upon occasion made his walking slow.

His pace quickened.

Huh.

That was interesting.

Not interesting enough for me to ever forgive him for hurting her though.

He led me outside, to a secluded patio area where no one could see us.

"This isn't the cafeteria," I remarked, trying to figure out what the hell he was planning on.

Was he going to attack me before I could attack him? I could take this ginger twink.

I didn't think he was dangerous or such a shitty person.

In fact, I liked him, he was just socially awkward and didn't deserve the rumors his family got.

That was entirely conditional on whether or not he hurt Little Swan though.

No matter how much I liked his family, it didn't matter.

I would personally tell them about his death if he had caused those injuries to Bella.

He nodded slowly, "I thought the privacy would be best for this scenario. We can stop by the cafeteria on our return to the room after I give you that explanation I owe you."

Oh, so he was going to be civil about this.

I didn't know how to word this.

How do you ask a suspected abuser about abuse?

God, I was not prepared for this situation. 

Cullen opened his mouth as if he were about to speak.

I hoped he wouldn't. I wanted to initiate this conversation. 

He shut his mouth as soon as I hoped he would.

Weird.

Lucky for me.

Good timing.

Here goes nothing.

"I am only going to ask this once. I would recommend being honest. Did you hurt Bella?"

A beat of silence.

Guilt.

Motherfucker.

He looked down slightly, "I swear to you that physically I only tried to help her. I did hurt her in other ways besides physical though."

What the hell did that mean?

"What the hell does that mean?" I crossed my arms.

He met my stare, "I caused her emotional turmoil and because of that I put her in an unstable situation that led to her injuries. I did not injure her with the intent of hurting her. Some of her blood was spilled while I was removing impurities from her blood stream after her injury."

God that was a weird way to phrase it.

It sounded true though.

Impurities? 

Well, she had fallen through a window.

Glass?

"You took out glass out of her skin and it cut her?" I asked, to clarify.

He nodded simply.

Okay.

This seemed true.

Maybe I had overreacted before.

I sighed, "I will be confirming this with Bella and I don't want you in the room for this conversation."

"I understand completely, if there is anything I can do to ease your mind about this situation, please let me know. I see how this can seem monstrous upon first glance, but know that I would never hurt Isabella Swan on purpose. If I ever hurt her, you have full permission to kill me. I only ask that you give my body back to my family after telling them of the news yourself," he bowed his head to me slightly.

Overdramatic.

Yet he mimicked my thoughts from earlier.

That was so weird.

He was so weird.

Not a bad person, which was such a relief to find out, but still just a weird little twink.

His eyes widened slightly, in surprise or amusement at something.

Bizarre.

I nodded, uncrossing my arms, "Good. Coffee?"

"Coffee," he agreed.

Chapter Text

It was two days before Bella had allowed me to see her.

That wasn't true.

It was two days before Bella was able to send Edward out of the room so that I could talk to her. He was her entire sense of comfort. Which was... complicated. It was sweet in some ways, the idea of having a partner to rely on as much as she did him was definitely tempting, but it was mostly concerning. No 17 year old, or sets of 17 year olds should be codependent with someone that she barely knew. Hell, even I knew Little Swan longer than Edward had. It wasn't jealousy, okay it might have slightly been jealousy, but I was primarily focused on my concern. 

Bella couldn't exist without him. That wasn't healthy. Healthy relationships didn't mean erasing someone's autonomy.

At least it wasn't what I had originally thought.

Bella had confirmed that for me as soon as I asked. Sputtering to my question of abuse she managed to say something along the lines of, "Edward would never hurt me like that. You really think I would keep him around if he tried to hurt me?"

That was the most alive she had seemed during that entire time I saw her in the hospital. Feisty, awkward, indignant that I would ever see her as a damsel in distress.

"You get how it looks though, Swan," I shrugged, leaning back onto the weirdly textured wall.

She sighed, "I get it. Edward's not like that though, you don't know him as well as I do."

"I trust your judgment," I offered a small smile, hoping that she would see it as me extending an olive branch.

I wasn't sorry for bringing it up, for asking the difficult questions. I just didn't want her to be mad at me about it, didn't want me checking for signs of abuse to ruin our friendship.

She relaxed back into her pillows, "Good."

A long silence fell between us, neither of us sure how to continue a conversation after an accusation.

I wished that Edward would come back so she could go back to being immersed in him too much to notice anyone else around her.

That wasn't a fair thought.

Thank god that would be kept in my own subconscious and I hadn't ended up saying that in front of the happy couple.

Why was I so bitter?

Was this concern? Or was it something else?

"So," Bella started, breaking the silence and bringing me back to the moment, "Your brother's here a lot."

I raised an eyebrow, "He's not gonna leave me alone to visit you in the hospital. No offense, but you kinda look like shit right now Swan." 

"I feel like shit right now honestly. Losing blood is not fun," she shrugged.

I nodded, "Maybe next time, try keeping your blood in your body? I'm sure your boyfriend would appreciate that."

Her face went through several appearances in a matter of minutes before settling on a blank expression that I had no idea how to interpret.

"Yeah?" She seemed to be fishing for information, which was weird concerning the fact that what I said wasn't really weird in any aspect.

What could she possibly need clarification on?

I crossed my arms, "I know I would appreciate you keeping your blood to yourself, could only assume that your boyfriend would feel similarly."

"You got a thing against blood?"

I laughed, "Little Swan, darling, you fainted during blood test day and you're asking my opinion on blood?"

"You know about that?" Her voice rose as her arms crossed.

I nodded, "You don't exactly keep a low profile in town, plus I have friends that are friends with people who are madly in love with you so I get to hear about all the Bella exploits." 

"I'm...sorry?" She settled on for a reply. 

I shrugged, "I don't mind." 

We fell into silence again, which was probably my fault since I didn't know how to talk to her. She felt removed from Forks, as if she had moved on from everyone. Not in a bitchy way but in a "she has a future outside of here and she's currently trying to claim it" way. 

Maybe that's just what a first serious highschool relationship did to a person. 

Maybe I was just jealous and letting this relationship distance the possibility of friendship between us. 

I didn't know anymore. This whole situation was weird and I was tired of being in the hospital, watching over Louis who was watching over Charlie who was watching over Bella. 

It felt unnecessary for me to be there. What was I doing besides making Bella uncomfortable with me?

I should go. 

Edward was in the room before I even moved. I hadn't even noticed he was approaching. Weird. 

"Bailey, my sister is insisting on the two of you hanging out over at your place. She wants to talk about prom, I assume," he moved to Bella's side.

I took a step back,  "Oh."

That was unexpected. And really weird timing. 

The Cullens operated on really weird timing and coincidences and it was really becoming apparent the longer I spent with them.

"You should go," he gestured to the door. 

Oh. 

I was intruding. 

But I didn't want to leave Louis here alone to be the third wheel to Charlie and Bella's mother. Not that he was a third wheel but there was definite tension there that I couldn't define.

"Bella will be fine, Louis will be fine, Alice is an unstoppable force to not be reckoned with," Edward remarked calmly. 

It wasn't even subtle anymore the fact that he was trying to get me to leave. 

Fair enough. 

I could read the signs. 

I nodded again, a fake smile on my face, "You're probably right. Catch ya later Cullen, Swan." 

And with their goodbyes in my ear I walked back to the waiting room.

Bella's mom wasn't there. The Chief was though, passed out on my brother's shoulder. 

Louis watched me approach, gesturing to the chair next to him. 

I shook my head. 

"You got kicked out?" He said when I was close enough to hear his whisper. 

Yes. 

Clearly. 

I shook my head again, "Alice wants to hang out and I don't want to be in the hospital anymore." 

"Text me when you get home," he offered his keys to me. 

I took them, "Chief's going to bring you home? Or are you staying with him?" 

"I don't know Bay," he sighed, "it's complicated." 

I pocketed the keys, "I don't want to be alone, Lou."

"I know." He made eye contact with me before I shook my head and walked out. 

No one wanted me to be there, I was intruding. 

So I would stop intruding and go where my presence was requested. That would be easy enough.

Chapter Text

I had not found a date to prom.

Instead, I was just going with a group of friends by which I meant that I was third wheeling Alice and Jasper until we got to the school where I would third wheel more couples.

Alice had insisted that I come over to Bella's house to get ready with the two of them, Edward had warned me not to resist so I didn't. Which I wouldn't have resisted anyway, by now, I knew Alice was a force of nature. Unstoppable, beautiful, and a wonderful thing to witness. Jasper and I could agree on that. Not that I was in love with Alice or anything, the adoration I gazed at her with was purely platonic. 

The adoration I gazed at Swan with, however, was another story. She was beautiful without makeup but there was something that made my heart rush whenever a traditionally tomboyish girl dressed up as full femme. Especially when she did so while keeping her converse on.

Fucking hell.

Alice had done a similar number on me, making me unrecognizable as myself but very recognizable as hot. I believed what she said back at our last dance about me ending up with a date, I felt a newfound confidence that I was going to be okay. And maybe fall in love.

When I brought that up to Alice, basically as soon as she finished my makeup, she didn't have that same confidence. Her voice sounded like a normal friend speaking rather than the truth it rang out with that forced the universe to listen to her predictions. She seemed uncertain, as much as Alice could ever be uncertain. That was weird but I didn't want to spend time unpacking it so I just ignored it and followed them out to the car.

The car ride over was quiet, I drove the minivan with Alice and Jasper inside it while Edward took Bella in the Volvo. I felt less like I was intruding with Alice and Jasper, probably because Alice was insistent not to leave my side. Which again, was weird but I just wanted to have a nice prom. Maybe she was concerned I'd feel left out and go all sad on her.

By the time I found a parking spot, Tyler took my usual one which was bullshit because he should not have a license anymore, Edward and Bella were talking to two people who definitely didn't go to our school. Leah Clearwater and one of Embry's friends, Jacob Black. Both in long sleeve white shirts and ties, though Leah wore a bolo tie rather than the traditional black tie worn to proms.

Why was Leah here? I didn't care, I didn't want to scare her off again, I should just go inside.

And I was going to but Jacob waved me over and if he was anything like his father, I knew he'd give me so much shit if I didn't just see what he wanted.

"I'll meet you inside," I said.

Alice opened her mouth to protest but Jasper took her arm and spoke for both of them, "Be safe. We will see you in a minute." His voice calmed all of my stress about seeing Leah around. What was I worried about? Everything was going to be fine.

"Spencer," Jacob said as I reached them

Edward had gone inside with the rest of the Cullens, apparently they had an unspoken agreement not to be here for whatever was about to go down.

I wondered if Jacob was going to profess his love for Swan. But that also raised the question why Leah was here. Maybe one would profess his love and the other would hatecrime me. 

"Black," I said in acknowledgement.

"Swan," Bella said, crossing her arms, "Now that we've got introductions over, will you tell me how you ended up here Jake?"

Leah stood silently, her arms already crossed which wasn't the most promising sign.

"Can you believe my dad paid me twenty bucks to come to your prom?" He admitted, slightly ashamed.

Oh that was a curveball.

"Yes I can," Bella muttered.

Apparently that wasn't a curveball, I just was out of the loop.

That still didn't explain the other one. 

He sighed, "We were supposed to be dancing during this, I wanted to come and cut in by Clearwater insisted we wait for you in the parking lot. She also insisted she tag along after finding out where I was going."

"Shut up Jacob," Leah rolled her eyes.

I glanced at her, raising an eyebrow.

She met my gaze for a moment before looking down.

Bella looked between the two of us before gesturing to the school, "Come on Jake. I'll give you the dance you wanted."

"Play nice Clearwater," Jacob said before taking Bella's arm and walking her inside to the prom.

Which left Leah and I alone in the parking lot.

Neither of us said anything to each other for a minute before I gestured to the bench outside the school, "If you actually wanna talk to me, we should go sit there, out of the way."

Where no cars would hit either of us. Not that I was terrified of being in this parking lot. 

"Okay," she said and we walked over there.

I sat on the bench and after a moment of hesitation, she sat down next to me.

I had all sorts of questions but I didn't want to ask them. This was weird. This whole thing was weird. I wasn't going to instigate it, that would be on Leah. Especially, since I didn't know what this was about.

"Sorry," she muttered.

I shrugged, "It's fine. We're both awkward. Why'd you come here?"

"I came here to apologize for running away from you," she said, looking into my eyes.

Oh.

I didn't know how to take that. Better deflect.

I raised an eyebrow, "Was that muttered sorry your apology?"

Silence before she rolled her eyes again and offered a small smile. "It was going to be but I guess I can do better."

"By all means," I gestured for her to go on, leaving my hand in between the two of us.

She stared at me, "I am sorry for leaving the first time we hung out. I don't know how to do this whole friendship thing and... Seth really liked you. I don't know why I came, I just don't want to lose any opportunity of knowing you I guess."

"We all know how intimidating I am," I offered, still not sure what to say.

She shrugged, "I don't really do friends. I prefer to be alone and it was weird to meet someone who goes against that preference."

She was lonely and didn't want to be anymore. I could offer her my friendship. As long as she was okay with being friends with a gay fucker.

"Can I tell you what I thought happened?" I asked.

Leah nodded, "Sure."

"I thought...you didn't want to be friends with a lesbian," I said.

The words hung in the air for a minute.

She shook her head, "That doesn't bother me." Her words seemed genuine. Maybe I could trust this after all.

"Even though you're straight?" I asked.

She shrugged, "I...It doesn't bother me. Your sexuality doesn't matter to me. I'm not asking for your hand in marriage, I just wanted to clear up any awkwardness so that next time we see each other, we could work on being actual friends. Cause Seth is mad at me for abandoning you and keeps on asking me to invite you over for dinner."

"I'm glad Seth wants to be friends," I offered her a teasing smile.

Leah crossed her arms, "Yeah yeah. Are you going to accept my apology or not, Bailey?"

"Sure. I'm not going to promise my hand to you or anything but if you wanna try this whole friend thing, I can clear a space in my busy schedule," I said.

She shrugged, "Good enough for me. I should probably let you go to your own dance and your other friends."

"You could come in with me?" I offered.

She shook her head, "I don't do dances after my date never showed to my own prom. You go on. Oh and send Jacob out if you see him cause he's my ride."

"Will do. See you around Leah," I said, getting up from the bench.

"See ya," she stayed at the bench as I walked away from her and into the gym.

I felt weird about leaving her, despite not really knowing her.

There was some sort of connection there.

Maybe just me feeling bad about how lonely she clearly was. It was most likely just a sign that we were gonna be really good friends. Or I was just projecting my feelings onto another person, not that I had ever done that before, that would be weird.

As soon as I entered, Alice pulled me into a hug.

"You're alive!" She exclaimed.

Odd.

I took a step back from her, "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Oh who's to say," she said vaguely, as if I would just dismiss this as part of her eccentric nature.

And I normally would, but she sounded so genuinely shocked about it.

Was I supposed to die out there? Why was she treating me like that? And how did she know when my life was supposed to end?

Jasper put an arm around Alice, speaking his soothing voice, "You missed the first two songs Bailey, and my dearest worked herself up about it."

Well that was...nice?

"I need to find Jacob, Leah asked me to send him out," I said.

Jasper gestured to Jacob leaving dejected, "I do believe that has already been handled."

"So really what you need to do is dance with me for the rest of the night," Alice offered a hand.

I took it.

For the rest of the night, I was passed between person to person, always in someone's arms.

Almost as if they were afraid what would happened if they let me go.

Chapter Text

As soon as summer hit, Ben showed up at my house with a dvd box set of Yu-Gi-Oh!GX and a list of all the times I had ditched him for the Cullens, specifically Alice, or Little Swan.

Naturally, with blackmail such as that, I let him in.

I wasn't thrilled about it. Sure, I really had fallen out of touch with him during the semester since we only had homeroom together and he had a different lunch. I wouldn't deny I had missed him while other friendships had blossomed. However, I wasn't sure I missed him so much that I wanted to watch more Yu-Gi-Oh, after all, that was what he had Austin for.

We were sat on the living room floor, just the two of us as Louis was visiting his sister again, leaning against the couch so that the tv was slightly above us. Ben always insisted on this; he considered it to be more true to the theatrical experience. I didn't care, I was used to sitting on the floor after nearly 3 years of putting up with his and Austin's bullshit.

Two episodes in, I started to get restless. I couldn't pay attention when the subtitles were saying different things than the audio, and we would have to deal with the subbed version because the English version didn't come out for 4 months or something and Ben was impatient to "get his Yugi on" which I didn't want to spend time unpacking.

"How many episodes are there?" I asked.

Ben glanced over at me, "That is a complicated question."

I sighed, crossing my arms.

"Okay so there are 34 episodes on this disk, technically there are 36 episodes out but I haven't been able to pirate the other two yet because they came out like yesterday and the week prior. This season is supposed to air until September and there should be around 52 episodes if the blogs I follow are correct," Ben said.

I raised an eyebrow at him, "And we're watching this now instead of binging in September because..."

"People get concerned if you disappear on them a couple months of the school year. Plus, season two should release in October. Also, there is no way you are gonna tolerate enough of this at one time to catch up to the release schedule," Ben said.

That...was a fair point.

I shrugged, "A disappearing act would be concerning. Like going to classes but not talking to anyone because your mind has been zombified by Yugi or whatever the fuck the new one is called."

"It's Jaden Yuki. It's set 10 years after the first series, like I said earlier," Ben crossed his arms as well.

I shoved him lightly, "Nerd."

"If you hadn't become Alice Cullen's pet project over the semester, we wouldn't be doing this," he teased, flashing me a slight smile.

Pet project?

That was a weird name for our friendship.

Sure, our friendship was weird but she was excitable and didn't have other friends. It was understandable. I wouldn't call it a project. I wasn't anyone's project.

I rolled my eyes, "Yeah? What's that supposed to mean?"

"You're joking yeah?" Ben's tone turned oddly serious which I wasn't particularly fond of.

Huh.

Maybe this was going to be an actual conversation and not just a passing remark.

I turned down the volume on the anime I stopped paying attention to after the opener, "No. What's that supposed to be mean?"

"You've seen how she looks at you," Ben said.

As if that was enough of an explanation.

I stared at him, "What's wrong with how she looks at me?"

A moment of silence.

"What's wrong with how she looks at me?" I repeated.

Ben sighed, "Y'know. She used to look at you as something that interested her, clinging to you, and inviting you to everything out of nowhere. After you asked Bella to the dance, suddenly she's attached at your hip and the rest of the Cullens are talking to you, despite never talking to any of us before except with that weird blood feud with Lizzie. She takes you to the dance, then takes you to prom and then throughout prom, she doesn't let you go beyond the arms of her or any of her siblings. Now she looks at you as if you're doomed, she looks like she'll lose you any second and it's so fucking weird. Every time you enter a room she's in, she looks genuinely surprised to see that you're still alive."

Huh.

I didn't know how to take that.

Better deflect.

"To be fair, whenever I enter a room, I'm also genuinely surprised to see that I'm still alive," I said.

Ben rolled his eyes, "You asked what was wrong with the look and I'm telling you. She used to be overprotective and now she looks like she's mourning you every single time you leave. The whole friendgroup has noticed. Hell, even Ang has noticed and she doesn't even know you."

"How's it going with you and Angela?" I asked.

Another deflection.

Ben let it slide, knowing better than to push me too hard, "Angela's great. I don't know how I finally got the balls to ask her out but I'm glad that I did. I think I'm ready to spend the rest of my life with her, not a word of that to Lee or Austin."

"I won't tell. You gotta update your lingo though cause Sammy would kill you if she heard you refer to courage as balls. You know she's leaning extra hard into the man hating feminist stereotype." I said. 

Ben shrugged, "What's Sammy gonna do? She graduated early, we're never gonna see her again."

"You said the same thing about Lizzie," I offered, letting the conversation fizzle into something completely meaningless while my brain got to work on unpacking some of the thoughts my brain was racing with.

What was going on with Alice Cullen? Was there actually something or were my friends just feeling neglected?

I had noticed her being overprotective of me but I thought that was just because she really only had me and Bella as friends outside of her family. But she did look at me in a different way than she did Bella.

Bella she approached with the same certainty as she did everything else. Or really more certainty it seemed like. Alice knew Bella was going to be fine and she was confident in that.

But she seemed lost around me, if what Ben was saying was accurate.

I didn't want to work on figuring that out.

Did I need to?

Did it matter?

Maybe I should just make sure I wasn't devoting all of my time to one person and work on having a more balanced and healthy approach to friends. Hopefully, that would fix everything so I wouldn't have to do the hard work my therapist had always talked about. It's called opening a conversation, she would say. She would also say that I should have gone with Louis today but we weren't thinking about that.

If my friends were being weird, I should focus on that first before focusing on Adelaide. In fact, maybe I could dive headfirst into this whole mess and never deal with Louis' sister. That would be ideal.

It would also be ideal if we could stop watching this.

I stood up, "I'm ordering takeout."

"You should get from the Thai place so Lee has to deliver," Ben said, not particularly bothered by me switching from autopilot to manual.

We both knew I would be switching back to autopilot in a minute anyway.

I nodded, "I'll make sure to pay in card so he has to deal with that new Square thing his restaurant is rolling out."

"Bailey Spencer, I have missed you," Ben cackled.

I grinned, heading into the kitchen to use the phone.

At least things were the same with me and Ben. I could always count on my best friend.

Chapter Text

I had never thought I would end up in this situation. Sure I knew other people did these things all the time but I had never properly experienced this...this rush of joy. This euphoria with basically the weirdest assortment of girls. 

We were parked in a bank parking lot in Seattle, looking at the end of a Pride Parade. A real, honest to god, Pride Parade.

I was frozen in terror, or anticipation, or something that I couldn't put my finger on the name of. Either way, I was just kind of stuck, sitting in the backseat, looking out at it but unwilling to step out of the car. 

Alice was sitting next to me in the backseat, Rosalie and Leah were in the front. Alice offered me her hand, I took it, the ice cold helping to ground me a little. 

"Are we getting out or did we drive all the way up here to sit in the car with a shitty view of the parade?" Rosalie asked, unbuckling her seatbelt. 

Leah crossed her arms, "Ease up Cullen, give her some time to take things in."

"What's there to take in? It's loud, there's a million people around, you can't experience anything else from here," Rosalie rolled her eyes. 

Alice cut in before I had to, "We're going to get out of the car now, Bailey. Then we are going to stay together as a group and I need you to promise me that you will stay with Rose or I the entire time." 

This was the fourth time Alice had brought up staying specifically with Rosalie or her rather than just staying with someone I came with. I wasn't entirely sure why Leah freaked Alice out or the idea of me going unsupervised freaked her out that much but I allowed her neurotic behavior. After all, it was Pride in a big city, this was extremely dangerous and would probably end in riots and arrests. Alice was allowed to worry about me and she was allowed to only trust her family. 

However, Leah very much was over this whole thing. She was cold to them as soon as they were cold to her and it was a little bit killing the vibe. But it was fine, that was on me. 

Invite the girl you're barely friends with to a dangerous event with the family that is overprotective of you. That'll go well without any tensions. Naturally. 

As soon as we got out of the car, Alice linked arms with me on my left side, Leah stood at a little distance but within arms reach of me on my right side. Rosalie stood behind me, further back, with her arms crossed. It was a hell of an entourage, it made me look like I had three bodyguards rather than three friends I had begged to come to this with me. It was weird to think of them as bodyguards but that's what it felt like. 

We took position towards the end of the parade and Alice let go of me to go stand in front to retrieve swag bags for us. 

As soon as she did that Leah leaned in and whispered, "You know when I said we should hang out, I didn't mean Pride with two psychotic straight girls." 

Wait. The way she said that made it seem like she wasn't straight. That was weird, unexpected, interesting turn of events. 

I was reading too much into this.

I shrugged. 

"I'm not straight," Rosalie hissed barely loud enough for either of us to hear. 

What the fuck, she had really good hearing. That was actually impressive. 

Leah turned towards her, arms crossed, "Aren't you dating a man?" 

"Yeah, and you used to date that dog before he ran off with your cousin right? Bisexuality exists for both of us," Rosalie rolled her eyes. 

Woah.

That was uncalled for. 

Also I had no idea what the fuck she was talking about.

Leah took a step back to be closer to Rosalie, "I'm gonna ignore the fact that you're airing out my laundry for the sake of Bailey having a good time."

"Good, ignore it," was the short reply.

Leah took another step closer to Rosalie, abandoning me to the crowd, "Aren't you going to apologize to me?"

I was fine being abandoned, I did not want to be in the middle of this. This was terrifying. I thought Lizzie and Rosalie were awful to witness but this? This was somehow worse.

"Why would I apologize? You said you were going to ignore it, didn't you?" Rosalie's voice was sickly sweet, as if those weren't fighting words. 

Leah took another step forward, then I felt an arm link around mine.

Cold, skeletal, yet strong. 

I glanced over at Alice who had a questioning expression on her face, I offered her a shrug. 

She tugged at me, "This whole thing is giving me a headache, why don't we check out the vendors?"

I glanced again between the two fighting, if they had hackles they would be raised at each other. It was nearly animalistic the way they were staring at each other. 

They would be fine without me. Or they would kill each other. But either way, I didn't want to witness two people I didn't know terribly well fighting. If you witness something like that, then there are expectations of which side to choose and I didn't know enough about Leah to understand the level of severity of Rosalie's words. 

Plus Lou would be disappointed if I got into a fight with either the Cullen girls, who he desperately wanted to like him, or a Clearwater, who could fuck up his invitation to 'Fishing With The Boys' a sacred ritual I knew better than to mess with. 

"Vendors sound great," I offered. 

Alice smiled at me, "Perfect." As she started to lead me in a direction, she handed me a bunched up tshirt.

I unraveled it to read 'Irreverant Queer Woman'. I smiled back, "Cute."

"One of the choirs had this as their slogan, I thought it fit you pretty well," Alice chirped. 

I gasped, placing a hand on my chest for emphasis, "You think I'm irreverant?"

"I do. And it's part of the reason we get along so well," Alice rolled her eyes at me, her smile never leaving her face. 

I shrugged again, "You may have a point."

As we approached the vendors, the sun finally broke free of its cloud cover and I noticed something I hadn't before. 

Alice was full on sparkling, she looked like a discoball. She was...entrancing. 

I stopped in my tracks, admiring her. It was weird, she took my breath away...even more than usual. I felt like I had to go with her wherever she decided to take me, I felt safe. She was so beautiful in the sunlight, I felt as if nothing could possibly happen to me here. 

"Bay?" Alice said. "Bailey." She said again, trying to get my attention. 

I shook my head, clearing my thoughts. 

God this was weird, why was I being so down bad for sparkles? Not even sparkles, body glitter. I fell hopelessly in love with her because of body glitter?

I hoped that was not a new fetish for me, I did not need to lower my dating pool that much. 

Alice tugged on my arm, saying my name again. 

God, I needed to get my shit together. 

"Sorry, your body glitter distracted me. I didn't see it earlier, only now that you're in the sun," I responded, trying to ease her concerns. 

Alice glanced down at her arms, before an uneasy small laugh, "Can I be honest with you? I totally forgot that I put that on today. It's glitter that specifically reacts to the sun and it's been so cloudy it slipped my mind. Sorry for the lack of warning!"

She seemed off. Maybe uncomfortable with me pointing it out? Or maybe I was acting off. That was probably it. I needed to be normal. 

"Turns out I'm actually just a magpie, forget how to walk when I see something shiny," I joked, trying to ease the tension. 

Alice relaxed as we started moving again, "Well you know I wouldn't terribly mind if you stole me away for my sparkles but Jasper would not take that well." 

Back to mock flirting, apparently that was what made her comfortable around me. 

"Jasper can fight me for you, I'll take those odds," I responded. It felt like normal again, the moment of entrancement fleeting. There was definitely something wrong with me. 

She laughed, a real one this time. "Bailey, you are not to fight the love of my life. I would say it's because you don't stand a chance but I know you'd take that as a challenge so I'll make it a promise to me that you won't."

"Jasper's chill, there will be zero altercations between me and him I promise." Unless of course, he hurt Alice or acted weird around Alice in the way that Edward was constantly acting weird about Little Swan. 

Alice and I went through basically every vendor there, most of them queer folks themselves if not spouses or family of queer people. It was nice, it was a reminder that there was a community out there and we would take each others money even if some of the larger corporations wouldn't. There were of course a few local Seattle businesses brave enough to hand out frisbees and waters with their logo on it and even a political candidate with his own booth. 

By the time we were wrapping up shopping, Alice had several bags full of gifts for people, some that "aren't for you Bailey" yet I wasn't allowed to look at. She had spent thousands in this area and the vendors were starting to look at her, and me in the sense that I was being dragged with her to every booth, with a look of awe. 

It was at this time that Leah and Rosalie caught up to us. Rosalie had covered up, putting on a shawl and a hat that somehow elevated her outfit even more while protecting her from the sun. She would not be losing her paleness today. 

"And here the headache returns," Alice muttered. It was weird, she didn't say it in a malicious way but rather a curious way as if she wasn't expecting that to happen. 

I glanced beteeen Leah and Rosalie, all sense of tension between them was gone. Instead there was almost respect there. 

Leah ran up to me as soon as she spotted us and started talking, "Rosalie is a total badass dude."

"Yeah?" I glanced over at Rosalie who was smirking slightly.

Leah nodded, looking more related to Seth than ever with how excited she was, "Rosalie broke a man's jaw without spilling a single drop of blood."

What the fuck.

"What happened?" Is what I actually managed to say at the same time Alice blurted out "Rosalie did what?!?!"

I had never heard her screech like that before, I turned to her and her face was a million emotions before she composed herself back into a tight smile. 

Rosalie raised a hand at Alice and looked her dead in the eye, "He put his hands on her Alice. That disgusting creep touched her. He's lucky I allowed him to live."

Okay I was fully missing a lot of pieces here. 

"Basically, Rosalie and I were fucking at each others throats and then I walked away. This fucking guy came up to me, I was all alone, and he starts talking this racist sexist shit and I'm like dude leave me alone. I'm about to punch him myself when he like tries to grope me and Rosalie comes out of nowhere and punches him so hard his jaw fucking shatter and he falls to the ground," Leah explained as the Cullen sisters remained motionless staring at each other. 

Damn. Rosalie really was a fucking badass.

Rosalie lowered her hand slowly as if taming a wild animal, "Alice, no one was around, only Leah saw. The guy didn't get a clear idea of who I am."

"Okay okay okay. It's fine, I didn't see that happening today but it's fine," Alice muttered. 

Rosalie glanced over at me, seeing my arm linked with Alice, "We're going home, bring her to the car if she won't move. I think the shock got to her." 

"Okay," I responded way out of my element.

We started heading out, Alice just muttering the entire time amist the crowds of people celebrating. We all were definitely killing the vibe as we passed.

As we got in the car, Alice finally said something loud enough for me to hear, "Carlisle is going to kill us."

"No he won't," Rosalie started the car, "The creep looked like Royce."

Alice relaxed, leaning against me, "Oh okay." 

With that, all tension seemed to resolve. Leah and I both shrugged at each other in confusion but hey I was confused all fucking day so this was nothing new to me. And at least the 3 hour drive would be peaceful. 

Hell of a first Pride. 

Chapter Text

The rest of the summer was pretty uneventful; there were a few more lake trips, Ben and I caught up on Yuki's adventures, and Alice Cullen still was fascinated by me. 

Besides that, we were starting our senior year and there was plenty of excitement over it. Enough excitement that the friendgroup decided we needed to have a Back to School party at the end of the first week. 

I had tried politely declining, since we weren't in kindergarten anymore and also we all had an ungodly amount of coursework to do despite it being the first week of school, but Tha driving Lee's mom's minivan had pulled up outside my house so truly I had no choice. 

Lizzie had offered to host, remembering we existed after her college coursework had ended for the semester. She was working on her associates of science from the local community college while working part-time so none of us took her absence personally but of course we still gave her a hard time. 

As friends do. 

Lizzie's place was a shitty studio apartment just outside of Forks. It was the stereotypical broke college student's place in that there were too many people in it to fit comfortably. 

I had claimed a perch on a beanbag, Sammy was lying across my lap. Ben, Austin, and Lee were squished on the couch with Tha on Lee's lap. 

Angela stood next to the couch, one hand on it. This was her first big hangout with us as Ben's official girlfriend. She was frozen in place awkwardly and had been since her Ben and Austin had arrived together.

Lizzie was sitting on her kitchen table, legs swinging off the sides. Around her was cheap wine and a pipe. Both had been passed around earlier and now there was the lull following the initial excitement of "everyone's in the same room together, never been seen before". 

I didn't hate it but this was objectively the worst part of the party. 

It was weird. 

I felt like I didn't really know how to interact with everyone. Maybe I was spending too much time with the Cullens and Leah, I had forgotten how to properly just hang like we used to do.

"I'm bored," Sammy whined from my lap bringing me back to the awkward energy in the room. 

I pat her head gently, "Go get another beer or something." 

"Mother! That's so irresponsible of you to suggest," she gasped, putting her hand on her mouth in mock surprise. 

I shrugged, "You're the one who graduated early, you're like an adult now."

"Damn," Sammy said. 

Lizzie piped up, "It's true. You're now the other fucker who's not in highschool anymore." 

"Our baby's growing up," I glanced over at Ben. 

He glanced between me and Angela hesitantly, "You should probably stop referring to her as your kid now."

There was a weird energy there that I didn't want to unpack. 

Ben was being weird, probably because his girlfriend was there and now he was acting like our friendship was different than it actually was out of insecurity for his relationship. Classic straight person move. Suddenly we couldn't be as close because he was worried about his girlfriend being jealous as if Angela cared about Ben and I calling each other Sammy's parents. Everyone in here knew that Angela was way more my type anyway. 

"I'm being abandoned?" Sammy cried, thrashing about on my lap. 

I pushed her, rolling her off of my lap, "Apparently. You're on your own, kid."

"I didn't mean solve my boredom by orphaning me," Sammy got up, brushing herself off and went to grab another beer.

I shrugged, "What your ex-father says goes."

"Come here grown adult," Lizzie said, patting at a spot next to her. 

Sammy sat down, crossing her arms, "I'm not a fan of being bullied for getting my shit done early."

"Would you rather be bullied cause you're old or be bullied cause you're a fucking nerd?" Lee asked. 

Austin piped up, "It'd be super easy to bully you cause you're a nerd, like even Angela over here didn't graduate early." 

Ben shoved him off the couch. 

"Hey!" Austin said, crawling over to my beanbag, "Fucking rude." 

I stared daggers into him; he was not taking over the beanbag. Over my dead body.

Ben said, "Don't be disrespectful to my girlfriend." 

"It's okay," Angela spoke up, "I thought it was funny and it's true. Even I didn't graduate early so..." 

Ben relaxed, Angela joined him on the couch.

Austin reached my beanbag and I started wordlessly beating him with a pillow so he would stop his approach.

Sammy rolled her eyes, still with a smile on her face, "I would rather be bored than the squad gang up on me. Y'all gang up on someone else." 

"How about Bailey?" Austin suggested, his voice intermittently muffled based on the swings of the pillow colliding with his face. "She's the little Cullen pet project after all." 

The pillow swings got more frenzied as I tried to crush his spirit. I was doing my best to ignore what he was saying, he had no investment in this conversation; he just wanted me to be distracted.

Lee grinned, "Well her and Little Swan are."

"Swan on Edward's arm and Bailey in between Rosalie and Alice, her perfect little fantasy," Austin sang out.

Lizzie scoffed, "Rosalie really? She's hot but tell me you're not crushing on her. She's a total bitch."

Okay so maybe I did have to engage in this conversation. 

"I'm not into her, or Alice for that matter thank you very much. Also Rosalie isn't terrible once you get to know her. And she apologized for how she treated you Lizzie," I said, dropping the pillow. 

Lizzie rolled her eyes, "She didn't apologize to me so it doesn't count. I don't care if you're friends with her but I have a hard time believing that she's not using you for something if she is being nice." 

"Rosalie is nice to her cause Alice is in love with Bailey," Lee chimed in. 

Not true. 

Not helpful either. 

I rolled my eyes, "She is not."

"How else do you explain the whole overprotectiveness? We all saw how you were in her arms the whole night at Prom and you went to your first ever Pride with her," Ben said, finally less on edge and back to his usual self. 

I didn't want him to be back to his usual self if this was how he was going to use his personality...for evil.

Before I could defend myself and Alice, the beanbag tipped over and I was launched from my seat onto the floor. 

That motherfucker.

I would have my revenge. I picked myself up, mock dusting myself off. 

Before I could do anything to Austin, Sammy had launched herself at him and the two of them were wrestling around the floor, rolling like maniacs. At least she wouldn't be bored anymore.

Lizzie got up, grabbed her pipe and started heading to the door, "Bailey, Tha, coming?"

"Yep," Tha and I chorused together, following like little ducklings

I gestured to Angela as we trailed out, "Want a break from the madness?"

"Sure," she got up from the couch, pressing a small kiss into Ben's forehead before following us out. 

Lizzie locked the door behind us, hopefully containing the madness, "None of you have to smoke, if you don't want it just pass it to the next."

"Honestly, I'm good on it. Y'all can just pass between the three of you," I said. I was already a little crossed. Plus I was really just here to get out of the chaos and start feeling grounded again. 

Hopefully by the time we got back, everyone would've moved onto a new conversation. It was uncomfortable how they talked about the Cullens. Especially since the more they talked about it the more I was forced to analyze the behavior and different aspects. 

The way that Edward had just come over to my car the second I had thought about hurting myself, the way Rosalie must've caught an expression and apologized for something she definitely was not sorry for, the way that Alice was attached to my hip despite only paying attention to her family and Bella. The warnings, the genuine relief in Alice's eyes everytime she saw me, the way she seemed to always know what was going to happen. Like she was playing chess with reality while everyone else was just living their lives. 

An image of a note flashed into my head. 

Shit. 

My car. 

The mystery on who brought it back, the ominous note, the way Alice hadn't left me alone since then. 

She knew something about me and either was looking out for me or was the one who was going to hurt me. 

What the fuck. 

A beat passed.

Lizzie shrugged, passing it to Tha, "Whatever you're comfy with." 

"I will also pass on it," Angela said. 

Tha took a hit before passing it back to Lizzie, "You sure? It takes a lot out of you being a girlfriend in this group." 

"I can only imagine what it's like not having known these fuckers before jumping in," Lizzie added. 

Angela shook her head, started to say something, and then paused with the word stuck at the tip of her lip. 

Nervous? Or just being thoughtful. Either would make sense for her. 

"You know this is a safe space yeah? You can say whatever you want to, also there is zero pressure to smoke," Tha said. 

I stayed silent, not sure what I wanted to add to it. Plus my mind was still racing about the Cullens, trying to figure them out.

Was I being paranoid? Was I being a conspiracy dick like everyone in town? I was so accepting of them, I couldn't just turn on them like everyone else just because of rumors. But something still didn't add up, I didn't understand what.

Angela shrugged, "I guess I got a little nervous but I'm not uncomfortable here. I'm pretty used to being around a big, chaotic, group and at least you all don't hate each other. It's not like I don't have friends, I just spend most of my time with Jessica, Lauren, and Bella. Or really just Jessica now since Bella is preoccupied and Lauren has not been the kindest." 

"Swan really did just disappear into Edward huh," Tha remarked. 

Lizzie shrugged, "It's the Cullen effect. You fall for them super easily and either you get taken in by them or they are super fucking rude to you your whole rest of schooling and then apologize later to someone else and not even to you." 

Wow. 

Very vague, good job Lizzie.

Another beat. 

"You wanna talk about it?" I offered. 

She shook her head, "Not with you. No offense Bailey but you're pulling a Swan right now. You're...how did Angela word it?"

"Preoccupied," Tha supplied, taking another hit. 

That hurt. It had hurt before but it kept crashing into me. There was irrevocable damage in the friendship from how involved I was with the Cullens, and I wasn't even spending a quarter of the time with them as Little Swan was. 

Angela held up a hand, "I think the Cullens are misunderstood. They seem nice enough but with how people treat them here, I think they have every right to be distant. I worry about Bella a lot, especially with the hospital trip, but I think she's just clinging to someone she likes and it might not be the most emotionally healthy relationship but she's happy and that's what matters." 

God I loved her. 

I would have to tell Ben later about how much he did not deserve her and how he better not fumble the bag. 

"I talked with her at the hospital, my brother and her dad are pretty close. She really seemed okay about it. I also threatened Edward and as much as he really just sticks to himself, he's an alright guy," I said.

Angela nodded, seeming genuinely appreciative of me for saying something.

Tha placed an arm on my shoulder, "You always speak of them so well. Both of you do."

"They're my friends," I said, forcing the image of the note out of my head.

Another pause.

Lizzie sighed, "I think I just need time to come around to the Cullens but if they are going to be such a part of your life and our friendgroup by association Bailey, I want to try more."

"I appreciate that," I said. 

Angela placed a hand on Lizzie's arm, gently squeezing for reassurance, "Friendgroups change and if you all can be so accepting of me in Ben's life, I trust that no matter who you surround yourself with that you're going to be okay."

"Ben does not deserve you at all," Lizzie laughed. 

The rest of us joined in. 

Angela smirked, "Oh he's well aware." 

Another round of laughter and we were all holding onto each other in some capacity.

We were going to be okay and the friendships would repair themselves and expand out to the Cullens; if they would let it.

Chapter Text

Not surprisingly, a majority of the teenage population in Washington enjoyed roaming around the forest late on a Friday night, typically doing some sort of illegal behavior. That had never been my scene. 

And now going through the forest looking for someone was even more not my scene. But what was I going to do? Not find her? 

Louis had gotten a call from Charlie, I had drove him over, and the search party was formed. 

Mostly it was cops and Charlie's group of friends with their kids. Not a single Cullen. Not very many people I actually knew.

The Clearwaters were there though and so we easily settled into a group. A trio traipsing through the forest. Seth kept on rubbing his eyes every other minute, the poor boy was truly up past his bedtime. Leah took the lead, wordlessly weaving through. She would glance back to make sure we were following but besides that, she was completely and utterly focused on the task. 

It was impressive how effortless she led the way. The confident aura of a leader practically surrounded her. It was...really attractive actually. Which was fucked to think about while there was a missing persons case. 

I really needed my heart to stop fluttering as she did minor things such as turn a corner. This was not the time to be a useless lesbian. 

Plus we had barely become friends. It would be dumb to catch feelings now.

It was about a half hour of searching before the calls of "Sam's got her" started sounding.

I sighed, allowing myself to breathe for what felt like years.

Seth grinned at me. Leah stopped moving, her expression shifting through a variety of emotions before settling on a bittersweet smile. 

"We can head back now!" Seth declared. 

Leah pat his shoulder, "You wanna lead Bailey back to the adults? I'm going to go home. I've got shit to do." 

Oh. 

So she was removing herself from the situation. That was fine. She was allowed. I shouldn't be disappointed in that. She had plans on a Friday night. Of course she did. 

"I know exactly how to get back!" Seth beamed at me, taking my hand and pulling me away in the direction we came from. 

I glanced back at Leah for a moment before allowing myself to be dragged away. "See ya!" I called out. 

Leah waved slightly and then took off deeper into the forest, weaving through until she was out of sight. 

Seth didn't move as fast, nor as gracefully, but we still made it back to the house pretty quickly. 

We joined the crowd outside, Harry putting his arm around Seth as soon as he was in range. I scanned the crowd. No Louis. 

Harry caught my look, "Leah alright?" 

"I think so, seemed like she was just going straight home," I responded. I chose not to include the part where I was pretty sure she was either weirded out by me or too busy to spend time with me. He didn't want to know what was happening there. I didn't think I could explain it to anyone either. Hell I couldn't explain it to myself. I would need a mind reader to attempt to parse this situation. 

Harry nodded, content with my abrupt answer, "That sounds bout right. Doesn't surprise me none that she's not sticking around. She'll find her way, don't you worry about that." 

I nodded, unsure of how to respond. 

Harry smiled at me, "Your brother's inside with the Swans. Tell him that we're heading out."

"Will do," I said, heading inside. 

There was the sound of rustling and things bei g moved upstairs. 

I sat on the couch, just waiting. I took out my phone, sending a text to Alice to let her know that Bella was found. It bothered me that the Cullens weren't there to help. Especially Edward. That was kinda the whole job description of boyfriend. 

The message came back with a "could not be sent" error. Her phone must be off. Or broken which would be why she had not shown up. 

It was a good chunk of time later before Louis came down the stairs. 

He was a mess, covered in tearstains, twigs, hair sticking half up. 

"The rest of the party left," I told him. 

He sat down next to me, leaning his head onto my shoulder. He must be exhausted.

"How is she?" I asked. 

He shrugged, "Bad. She's in shock, just keeps on muttering to herself. Definitely had some sort of trauma out there. Charlie's running her a warm soak now so she stops shivering. No injuries except for a few scars that are a couple days old." 

Shit. 

What had happened to her in the woods?

"I'm staying the night to make sure she doesn't choke or something in her sleep. You can stay over too if you want, up to you. The couch is yours," Lou offered. 

I raised an eyebrow, "Where are you going to sleep?"

"Charlie and I are gonna take shifts, one of us watching over her and the other one sleeping," Lou said. 

I nodded, "Makes sense. Do you need me here?" 

"Not right now. Bells could probably use a friend in the morning though," Lou said. 

I pulled him in for a brief hug, "I'm going home, I'll bring food in the morning. Text me if plans change. You get some rest."

"I won't," Lou said. 

I rolled my eyes, letting go of him, "Make sure the Chief does then." 

"I can do that." 

With that, I left the Swan residence and drove home.

Once I was home, I lied down. It was a few moments of closing my eyes with visions of Lou looking like shit and Leah disappearing before I gave up on trying to sleep. 

I pulled out my phone again, texting Alice. The same error. I texted Edward. The same error. I scrolled down deep on my phone to find the Pride group message. From there I grabbed the only number not saved as a contact and sent a similar text. The same error from Rosalie. 

Nausea filled my veins as I felt this sense of unease wash over me. Were they okay? Bella had been found but where were the Cullens? Something was wrong. 

I didn't have anyone else's number.

Or...

It took me 15 minutes of indecision before I finally called the hospital. 

"Hello, is Doctor Cullen there?" I asked after finally getting through their call menu. 

The receptionist on the phone sighed, "No. I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but today was his last day with us. Him and his family are seeking other opportunities. Is there another doctor I can direct you to?"

What the fuck. 

I hung up. 

What the hell was going on? The Cullens were gone? Bella left alone in the forest with the Cullens gone? Unreachable, her traumatized. 

I didn't know what was going on, all I knew was that I was going to absolutely end Edward Cullen's existence if he had ghosted her by leaving her in the deep forest. 

Chapter Text

It took about two weeks of going home from school with Little Swan before she truly noticed me. Which was impressive since I was very obviously in her house talking to her for two weeks. 

Less impressive when you figured in Bella basically being MIA from her body. Something about the shock and the trauma just left her going through the motions without a semblance of her personality in there. She kept up in school; didn't talk to anyone, got home from school, cooked, ate food, did her homework, and then went to bed where she had nightmares every single night. 

I did my homework across from her. Engaging her, or trying to. It was hard. She wasn't really there. It felt like talking at a comatose person but harder than that. It wasn't like Mom because Little Swan still put on the act of being a human.

It was some sort of horror story. Her body taken over, her soul gone. 

No.

It was major depression. Maybe some ptsd. Either way? I wasn't going to do much to help. I mean I would try but... it seemed like everyone was ignoring the fact that she needed at the very minimum a therapist. 

But Louis had decided I would be the one to keep eyes on Bella when Charlie could not. So I kept eyes on Little Swan and Louis kept eyes on Charlie.

I was midway through this essay about gender roles in Twelfth Night when Bella spoke, her voice hoarse considering it hadn't really gotten any use besides screaming every night. 

"Why are you here?" She asked. 

I shrugged, "Same reason I was here yesterday." 

She raised an eyebrow, her eyes no longer vacant. She was in there. 

"I need a homework buddy to keep me accountable," I said. 

A pause. 

She shook her head, "No, why are you really here?"

"I don't think you should be alone right now," I said, not wanting it to slip that I had been put on babysitting duty. 

Little Swan paused again, her eyes flashing with irritation, "I'm fine." 

"You're alive." I said. 

She glared at me. 

Goddamn I didn't really know what to do. I had been to a therapist before but I wasn't exactly trained to be one. If only we had a trained therapist in this town... oh wait, we did. So she should be there right now.

"I think it's great that you're alive," I said. 

She just continued looking at me, at least I could tell that she was sort of there. That was what counted. 

"But you're in survival mode. You're just going through the motions. And that's understandable but it's not an easy place to be," I continued. 

Little Swan sat down on the couch next to me, "I don't want to be alive." 

Holy shit I was unqualified for this. 

"...do you wanna talk about it?" 

She shook her head. 

A pause, a very long pause fell between us. 

She then picked up her backpack and started on her own homework. 

I glanced over to her, her eyes were vacant again. She was just going through the motions. A zombie again. 

The lucidity had been nice? while it lasted.

---

It was another month before she regained consciousness again.

I had cut it down to spending Monday nights at hers and then the rest of the week was mine again. Partly because of my own desire to not spend my entire senior year playing therapist and partly because Ben would not leave me alone about the new season of Yu-Gi-Oh that had come out. 

So Mondays were at the Swans, Tuesdays were at Ben's, and then every other day, I actually got to decide how I wanted to spend it. The Clearwaters kept on inviting Louis and I to things but Louis refused to go without Charlie and Charlie refused to go without Bella, so I went by myself a couple times. But everytime, Leah kept on bringing up Bella and there wasn't much more that I could say besides she was doing the same. So I stopped going to those. 

I was in the middle of responding to a text from Austin, begging me to finally get into bad action movies, when Little Swan looked up from the dinner she was making. 

"You don't legally have to be here. I'm 18," she said. 

I glanced over at her, "And I'm not a mandated reporter so I don't have to be here legally anyway." 

"I know your brother pays you to be here but there's no need," she said. 

I laughed slightly, "I'm not getting paid for this."

"Then why are you here? Don't you have friends to bother?"

"Don't you?" I shot back. Shit. Probably shouldn't have said that.

Her eyes flashed with indignation, "I'm not fragile." 

"Do you still want to kill herself?" I asked without thinking. God I was terrible at this. I would never make a good therapist. 

She paused, putting down the ingredients and staring at me in that unreadable way of hers. "I never wanted to kill myself."

"You just want to not exist?" I asked.

I probably shouldn't be going down this road. But she was talking and that was something. 

Bella shook her head, "No. Um. I don't want to be alive." 

"How is that different from not existing?" I raised an eyebrow. 

She leaned against the counter, sighing. 

A moment passed. 

Then another one. 

I had lost her, she was going back to zombie mode. 

Her voice was slow and quiet, but there, "I thought my future was going to be different. And now...everything of that future is gone. Every memory, every chance. I wanted...that future so bad. And it didn't want me."

 Oh god he had done a number on her. 

I didn't know what to do or what to respond. All I could think of was how I could semi-relate to this. Maybe I bring that up? Was that in poor taste? Was coming out actually comparable to a hetero breakup? Probably not. But what the fuck else do I do? She needed some wisdom. Something comforting. 

"When I was little, I had this whole dream of my life. I would marry a guy, my mom would have grandkids, and the next generation of my family would be closer together than the last. It's what I wanted more than anything." I gestured to the kitchen chair next to me, putting my phone away. 

She glanced at the chair but stayed where she was. 

"Then I found out I was gay. And...my mother died. Then a bunch of other shit," I said. She didn't need to know about the rejection or the conversion or the outing or bullying. No one really needed to know that, Ben did and a couple others but Little Swan wasn't on the list of my close friends. Hell, I barely knew her.

Bella took a seat next to me. I had successfully reeled her in with my trauma. Good job me. 

"Point is, I lost the future I wanted. And I wanted it so bad but it doesn't matter how much you want something, sometimes it's just not meant to be. If I could have been straight, I would have. It would've been so much easier," and everyone would have liked me better. Maybe my family wouldn't have fallen apart. 

No time for that, I was making a point. 

She was staring at me, face unreadable as always but clearly very awkward. Of course she was awkward. This was a weird situation, I was weird for being there.

I was never going to do anything for Lou ever again. He had lost that right.

"Futures change all the time. You lose one, you find another. You're never without a future, you just haven't figured out which path you're on yet. Being alive is beautiful that way," I said. 

A long pause.

Terribly awkward. 

I didn't dare look at her. 

I was pretty sure I was about to start crying which definitely would not be the move. 

She got up and in the most Chief manner I had seen her act, nodded, and said, "Dinner will be ready in 15." 

I nodded back, "Sounds good."

Chapter Text

Ben was curled up on the couch, leaning against me. Austin was perched on the edge of the seat next to me, arms wildly gesturing. 

It would have been a pretty cute scene had it not been for the dogshit movie that was playing in front of us. 

"So he's trying to awaken the dragon to get revenge on Ridley, they're figuring out that that is the case, and now they're planning a dungeon crawl," Austin said. 

I nodded slowly. 

Ben glanced over at me, "A dungeon crawl is where the party goes through different levels of the dungeon to go defeat the big bad and get treasure along the way." 

I nodded again. 

"Big bad is the like big bad evil guy," Austin explained. 

Oh wow. 

Mystery solved.

I turned to look at him. "Dude." 

"What?"

I rolled my eyes, "I could've figured that out myself."

"Hey! I'm just being helpful," Austin raised his hands defensively, "It's a pretty lore dense movie so I don't want you to be confused." 

I rolled my eyes again, "I'm tracking just fine." 

Austin started rambling about a mechanic that had changed from different editions.

I tuned him out and leaned in closer to Ben, whispering in his ear, "Who's Ridley?"

"Hero from 100 years ago who defeated him originally," Ben whispered back, a small smirk on his face. 

I ignored the smirk, "So when did we learn about him? I missed that." 

"That was in the first movie, the entire plot of it," Ben said.

Okay that made me feel less dumb. I was trying my best to follow this very heavy movie so the fact that the main plot came from a different movie made me feel a lot better. 

I nodded, "And we're jumping in on the second one because?" 

"Would you have really let us watch two of these movies?" Ben asked. 

No. Absolutely not. 

I shrugged, "I'm enjoying myself." 

Neither of us believed that.

"We can make this a regular thing then," Ben grinned at me. The absolute bastard. Taking my lie and running with it just to taunt me. 

I shoved him off of me. 

He temporarily leaned to the other side before settling back right next to me. 

I'd allow it.

"Hey! I was explaining important shit! You agreed that you'd pay attention," Austin whined, crossing his arms. 

Before I could say anything, Ben jumped in. "Bay was confused about how the first movie plays into this one. I think you should explain the lore of the first one." 

I glared at him. 

He glanced at me with that shit eating grin on his face before turning to Austin. "I know we said we'd just watch the new one but I think it is actually really important to catch her up to speed." 

Oh god.

"We agreed to the one movie," I blurted out.

A pause.

The boys nodded thoughtfully. 

Austin paused the movie, "I can just give you a quick overview of the first one."

It took him about 45 minutes to explain the entirety of the first one, complete with the behind the scenes contractual knowledge. 

During that time, I tried my best to act bored. I mean, it wasn't hard to act bored. The movie he was talking about needed like three to five years of knowledge of the source material to even start to enjoy. But despite my attempt at hating this, all I could think about was how his eyes lit up as he nearly fell of the couch gesticulating wildly. 

There was something beautiful about seeing this fucking geek so passionate. It felt healing. 

Maybe it was healing. 

I had been spending a majority of my senior year around a zombie. When I wasn't with her, I was recovering from being with her. And I wouldn't step away from that, despite the awkwardness she truly did need someone there, but it was refreshing to be around people that were so full of zest for life. 

I had missed my boys. I had missed my friends. I had missed when everything wasn't about if Bella Swan was responsive or not. 

It wasn't like I resented her, I didn't. She was going through it. But Louis was with Charlie all the time and I missed him. And everyone else had started tying Bella and I together where every conversation I had inevitably turned into asking about her. It was cruel of me but I had started to feel like a caregiver. 

Something needed to change. I needed her to be a person again so I could be my own person again. 

Or maybe I just needed to spend more time with these dumbasses talking about their nerdy interests. Maybe I needed to find something that I was as passionate about as they were about this. 

Bella Swan had absorbed my personality, I didn't feel like a person anymore. 

I hadn't realized I was crying until Ben wiped the tear off of my face. "Don't mourn Snails, Austin is omitting how terrible his onscreen performance is." 

Austin rolled his eyes, "I think that Stinker nomination was totally uncalled for actually."

"I mean yeah fair," Ben said before stage whispering to me, "He should have won."

Austin got up off the couch, "Do you want to go? Talking mad shit as if I'm just gonna let it slide." 

"Dude," Ben said, getting up as well, "Do you really want Bailey to see you get your ass beat again? There's only so many times she can see that without her respect level of you going down." 

"I don't think it can get lower," I said, a smirk on my face. 

Austin pouted, "You both are so mean to me." 

"And yet, we're your best friends," I pointed out. 

Austin flipped me off, "Not many choices in a small town." 

With that, Ben tackled him to the floor and they started wrestling. 

I pulled out my phone, checking to see if I had any messages while they were rolling around. 

Just one from Leah asking how Bella was. 

Great. 

I didn't even think that Leah cared about Little Swan but here she was, asking about her probably the most. Maybe she was being put up to it. Or maybe she had a crush on her or something. 

That would suck. 

The thought made me want to throw up. 

Did I still have a crush on Bella that just the idea of her getting into a relationship with another girl made me feel ill?

No that would be dumb. 

It didn't matter why I felt that way. 

I snapped my phone shut, tuning back into the wrestling match of the century. 

At least I had my boys.