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Chapter Text

The vast, eternal blue of the ocean is teeming with so much life, the vast amount that dwells under the surface is so vastly unknown and diverse that humankind has barely scratched the surface. There are so many creatures in the ocean, and each one more exciting and interesting than the last. From the unquestionable, queenlike majesty of the blue whale, to the whimsical and bright moon jelly, to the grim and unsettling black dragonfish. The depths and shallows of the ocean are home to some of the most incredible beasts on the earth. 

Out of the thousands of creatures of the ocean, the amount that are still undiscovered are innumerous. Out of all of those creatures, the illusive merfolk can be counted. 

The merfolk are a varied species, the variation in their species are as diverse as the colors of their tales. 

There are the deep sea merfolk, with massive lungs and eyes, capable of seeing and sensing everything within the deep dark in which they reside. There are the reef-dwelling merfolk, vibrant and bright in color and pattern, small in size, their thin bones and stiff fins perfect for swift movement. There are those who dwell in the vast and open ocean, large and built for the hunt, razor-sharp teeth and lethal claws, keen senses and unparalleled endurance. 

More and more species of merfolk exist, though among them, none are as utterly mythic as the siren. Rare and fantastic, the siren is a mermaid pulled from the pages of a legend. Among all the merfolk, the sirens most resemble humans, though they have an otherworldly beauty. Luminous eyes in colors that rival the  brightest jewels and treasures, a voice as powerful and as beautiful as the sea itself. Sirens are the merfolk that have led sailors to doom and prosperity, and are the stuff of childhood dreams and whimsy. 

Merfolk typically travel in pods, groups of the same species that operate in ways that best benefit their own dynamics and survival. While it is not unheard of for merfolk of different pods to mingle with one another, even interbreed and mate with each other, the process of integrating into a pod that isn’t one’s own can be difficult, especially with certain biological hurdles getting in the way. A swift and slight merperson from the warm seas of the tropics may find it hard to thrive among the strong and massive merfolk of the arctic. 

Such was the case with Shen Yuan, a merman who has been living among a pod of open-ocean merpeople for as long as he could remember. Shen Yuan of course, didn’t remember much. He remembered waking up among a rocky seabed, with rock-dwelling cabs climbing all over him, looking up into the face of a merman he had never seen before. 

That was his first memory. He could still recall his own name, he still knew what things were, how to speak, how to swim, but beyond that he was dead in the water. So, with absolutely no clue who he was or what he should be doing, he followed the merman who had woke him up, and remained with him and his pod. 

Even though he was welcomed with open arms, Shen Yuan was well aware that he wasn’t one of these folk. Liu Qingge, the merman who had woken him up, belonged among these folk. With his figure built for strength and violence, for hunting and traveling far and wide in the sea, and his deep blue and shining silver tail. Shen Yuan, with his rounded nails, dull teeth, unskilled eyes and glittering green tail, was clearly built for something else. 

Don’t get him wrong, he was grateful he was welcomed into Qingge’s pod, a blend of Qingge’s own family and a handful of others. He never felt unwelcome, but he always felt like a burden. On a good day, he would be able to catch a slow fish with his hands and gnaw through the scales with his impressive teeth, floating idly as he watched the rest of his pod chase down larger predators and rip them to shreds, blood staining the water as they fed. 

Shen Yuan always stayed a suitable distance away, not wanting the coppery blood to fill his gills and overwhelm the rest of his senses. He wasn’t built for bloodsport, but he never turned up his nose when Liu Qingge or Liu Mingyan would offer him part of their latest kill. 

When the pod needed to travel to another part of the ocean, they moved at a speed so intense that Shen Yuan had no chance at catching up. Not only could he not keep up with their movement speed, he needed to rest far more often, and even then, he only got the rest he needed when he was sleeping on the ocean floor, or on a rock, or even on the sand. He couldn’t rest on the surface or just under as they did. Embarrassing as it was at times, he would just have to cling onto Liu Qingge’s neck and rely on him to get him places, or even worse, use him as a bed. 

Really, at times it was far too much for Shen Yuan’s dignity, and it was only made worse when Liu Qingge would say that it was no problem, that he didn’t mind. Shen Yuan almost liked it more when he said that Shen Yuan was fussy and troublesome.

It was only when the pod came close enough to the shores that Shen Yuan felt like he could make it on his own, like he was able to do something without being carried. Mind you, he didn’t mind terribly being carried, he didn’t particularly like doing things, but he would prefer to be doing the bare minimum on his own terms. 

When the pod was close enough to the shore, Shen Yuan could split and go to the reefs and the rock formations, where he could bash crabs on rocks and scoop out their innards with his hands. The fish were smaller, easier to bite into and chow down on, and far, far easier to catch. Though, a lot more were poisonous. 

Shen Yuan could rest on the seafloor and watch the fish mill about as he traced patterns in the sand. Sometimes, he would grab pieces of driftwood, break off chunks, and run it through his hair. He liked grabbing shells and pearls, holding them in his hands and rolling them around. If he was feeling particularly bold, he would sneak close to where humans dwell, and he would hide somewhere shadowed and watch their feet move, watch their arms swing. They were so colorful and noisy. Shen Yuan was utterly fascinated by them. At nighttime, when he was less likely to be seen, he would pull himself up onto rocks to dry off. It was nice, sometimes, even if his hair always felt too heavy and coarse when it was dry. He liked to stare at the lights of the far of human dwellings, and wonder what it was like in them. How they could function, when things weren’t wet all the time. 

If he had more time than usual, he would swim across the shoreline, looking for caves and coves he could duck into, being able to pull himself onto the land during the day. The water was warm, and they were just a quick swim away from dinner. He wasn’t entirely sure why, but he always felt extremely comfortable in those little caves. Lonely, but very comfy. He was certain that if he could, he might stay in one of them forever. At the very least, it would beat having to swim around all of the oceans all of the time, piggybacking off of others. Alas, he was a young merman, unable yet to function by himself. 

The tides changed with the moons, cycled through their phases, and Shen Yuan reached his majority, the age in which he could leave the pod, find a mate, challenge the leader of the pod for his position. He had grown well, surrounded by kinship, and even if it wasn’t the upbringing he may have needed to suit his needs and desires, he still grew. Liu Qingge challenged his mother for leadership of the pod, and won. His sister became his advisor, who helped him plan their movements. Shen Yuan was still carried along, on backs and by hand. 

It wasn’t until Liu Qingge directed the pod in a direction they hadn’t been in many lunar cycles, that things began to change. 

“Shen Yuan, don’t travel too far from the pod.” Liu Qingge had uncharacteristically approached Shen Yuan as they arrived at their hunting ground. Usually, they would all set into the hunt with no preamble, so to have him approach was a little strange. Maybe it was because he was the pod leader now, and actually had the authority to boss Shen Yuan around. Shen Yuan didn’t particularly care if Liu Qingge was the pod leader now, he didn’t like being bossed around. 

Something of his dissatisfaction may have shown on his face, as Liu Qingge tried to suppress him with a look. “Not this time. It’s too close to too many humans.” 

Rolling his eyes, Shen Yuan poked his friend- yes, his friend, not the pod leader- in his chest, right above the dark blue mark there. “You just worry about you, Qingge.”

“I’m worrying about you right now.” Liu Qingge batted Shen Yuan’s hand away, practiced enough to avoid scraping him with his claws. “This place is a lot closer to big human populations, merfolk don’t usually come here, they get hurt.” 

“Have I gotten hurt?” Shen Yuan asked, unimpressed by the scare tactics. He pulled the cord of coarse rope he had tied around his wrist, unraveling the knot. He swam closer, and gathered all of Liu Qingge’s deep black, almost inky blue hair into a bunch. He tied the rope around it quickly, then pulled back to look at his handiwork. 

Pretty, pretty. Liu Qingge was prettier when all of his face was exposed. Cheekbones sharp as seaclass, and a jaw equally as so. Shen Yuan patted his cheek, glad of his claw-free hands so he could do so. Whoever Liu Qingge chose as his mate would be a lucky merperson indeed.

Though his stormy expression wasn’t doing him any favors. “The first time I found you, you were passed out in a bed of rocks down the coastline from here with a bloody gash on your head.” 

He-- was? Shen Yuan blinked and immediately whipped his head in the direction Liu Qingge had gestured to. “Here?” 

“Yes, here. So you have been hurt here. Don’t go poking around, I’ll catch you your meals.” Liu Qingge tugged on his hair, now neatly flowing behind him in one tail. “I don’t understand why you do this.” 

Shen Yuan shrugged. Really, he did it because it made Liu Qingge look prettier, and he was already pretty. None of his pod really cared for how things looked, making Shen Yuan an outlier yet again. “It’ll make you move faster, probably.” Shen Yuan guessed. It was more streamlined like that. “It’ll stop it from getting caught up in other tails, like what happened with Yang Yixuan that one time with the marlin.” 

It was pretty gruesome. Tugging and yanking and salty tears getting lost in salty water. It had been unfortunate, but also kind of hilarious. Poor Yang Yiuxan’s hair had been mutilated, and Shen Yuan was the only one who seemed to care about the poor youngling’s hair. It had so much potential! Wasted in the sea!

“Hm.” Liu Qingge tugged on it again. “Don’t go to far.”

“I won’t. Go kill some fish.” Shen Yuan batted him away with his tail. Liu Qingge left to do so without saying anything more. The feeding started soon after, and like hell Shen Yuan was going to stick around. 

Certain the rest of the pod was preoccupied with their hunt, Shen Yuan slipped away, swiftly heading out before he could even get the slightest whiff of the blood. He headed down the coast, the way that Liu Qingge had gestured before.

Of course, nothing looked familiar. Nothing ever did, really. Not even when he arrived at the rocky bed that he assumed was the home of his first memory, did anything stir in his head or his heart. Well, it wasn’t as if he was really looking for his past. It had been so long ago, Shen Yuan didn’t care if he found his original pod or not. It would be nice though, if he found something neat. Like his original pod or something. A nice cave. 

He followed the bed of rocks, drawing closer to the shoreline as he went. Crabs, algae, fish, some coral formations. The water around here was nice and warm. It was rather sweet as well. Felt nice, very nice. 

Oh, look, an opening! A cave! 

Excited, Shen Yuan quickly swam to the opening, entering it and swiftly moving through and up. He broke through the surface, and Shen Yuan fell in love. 

The cave was wide and spacious, the rocks forming the structure almost a dark purple, light blue where the sun shone through the gaps in the stone above. The shadows were a navy blue, and the surface of the water in the cave was still and sparkling. There was a wide entrance to the cave, large enough that Shen Yuan could see down to the rocky outside if he pulled himself halfway out of the water. 

The floor of the cave was smooth and cleared off of all debris, wide enough that Shen Yuan could spread himself out fully, even his arms. It was big! Shen Yuan felt absolutely giddy. This was perfect. Even if he felt nothing on his way here, something inside of him was certain that he had been here before. He loved this place. The air was sweet when he breathed it in through his lungs. There was something carved into the wall. He loved it when he found carvings. 

Something in his brain could understand human speech, no matter the dialect or language, but he couldn’t decipher any of the writing. He did want to though. Imagine what he could be able to learn about humans if he could actually read their words. Those washed-out scraps of paper and plastic that made it into the ocean, the bottles, the sides of ships, small bits of metal. Shen Yuan could learn so, so much if only he could read. 

On closer examination, the carving, which was carved into the floor of the cavern, was rather simple. It was human letters, he thinks, they all looked so different, inside of a bigger human shape. There was a cross between the words written there. Shen Yuan reached out and touched it. This… was something. His heart pounded in his chest when he touched it. 

Had this been his home? Was this Shen Yuan’s cavern?

The thought alone made him stupidly giddy, his tail splashing out behind him. If this was his cave- he could- he could stay here! He was of his majority, he could separate from the pod. He could live here in the cavern, and he could hunt and eat crabs near the shoreline, and he could spy on the humans nearby and learn about them, and he could come back to his cave, and then he could sleep on the soft sand at the bottom of the entrance, or even on the smooth stone.

Right, yes, he was doing this. He had to go talk to Liu Qingge immediately. 

He was going to dive back under the surface right away, when he was interrupted by a voice coming from the mouth of the cave. 

“Goddamn, shit, sonofabitch, why the hell did I ever agree to this?” The voice muttered angrily, growing closer. Shen Yuan’s eyes widened, and he ducked below the water, keeping his eyes above. It was a human, seashells and seaweed, it was a human. 

“‘Become a photographer, Shang Qinghua,” the voice continued. “‘You’ll be more successful as a photographer, Shang Qinghua.’ My ass.” Shen Yuan pressed up against the side of the pool. If he needed to go, he could be gone before the human could do anything about it. But right now, he really wanted to see a human up close. “Crossing the beach and getting pelted with balls and then having to trip on rocks and scratch the shit out of your leg. So successful.” 

The human came into view. He was tall, and big boned, kind of like a sea lion. He looked kind of like one too, non-threatening and a little confused. There were some things on his face, some parts made of clear glass so he could see. His clothes looked like normal human clothes, and there was a tiny black box around his neck. True to the man’s angry muttering, there was a long red gash on his leg. Shen Yuan watched him glance around the cave, until their eyes found one another. 

“Oh, hey, sorry, I didn’t know anyone was in here?” The man glanced around. Shen Yuan had absolutely no clue what he was supposed to do. The human… he didn’t know that Shen Yuan was a merman. Oh, yeah, yes, Shen Yuan could work with this. He swam back up, exposing his whole face. The man fumbled for the box on his neck and quickly brought it to his face. 

It flashed a bright light, like the sun when you broke the surface and forgot to close your eyes for the first time in a while. Shen Yuan cringed and blinked away the light stain in his eyes. Shen Yuan scowled. Was that a normal human thing? 

“Hey, don’t do that!” Shen Yuan protested. The human dropped the box immediately.
“Oh, shit sorry! You just- you’re like a model or something, right? I won’t publish it, see? I’ll delete it now.” The human knelt down by the side of the pool, and Shen Yuan swam closer, keeping his movements controlled. The man moved his hands over the bumps on the box, and there was a flat surface that had a completely different image on it. Shen Yuan starred.

That- on the box- was that him? It looked like the reflection he saw in the water, but from a different perspective, and it wasn’t moving! The man touched the box a couple more times, and the image kept changing, symbols flashing, then the picture was gone.

“Wait- bring that back!” Shen Yuan thrust his hand out toward the box, but the human drew back. He looked up at the human, who was looking back at him, a hopeful look in his eye. Huh. Humans sure kept their hair short. 

“Can I take a picture of you? No agency is going to come after me with a lawsuit or something?” The man asked. Shen Yuan had absolutely no idea what most of those words meant, but if it brought the… him back, he would agree. So he nodded his head. 

The man brought the box back up. “Do you wanna, did you want to smile? Or, no, maybe look less confused. No, less confused.” He tried to follow the instructions, staring up into the dark glass circle. “Right, that’s it!” 

There was the bright sunflash again, and Shen Yuan hissed and rubbed his eyes again. 

“Why did you do that again?!” Shen Yuan asked again, angered. If you apologized before, that means you shouldn’t do it again, obviously! 

“The flash?” The human frowned down at the camera. “Sorry, that’s how uh, I get good pictures in the low light?” 

“Pictures.” Shen Yuan tasted the word. Those were the non-reflections. “Show me.” 

The human smiled and couched back down, and showed him the picture. 

Pretty. So pretty. “Is that me?” he asked, pointing to the box, the picture, then back at himself. 

“Yeah, bro.” The man crossed his legs, Shen Yuan watched the movement, envious. “Are you okay? Like, did you bump your--” The human’s voice dragged out, holding the last syllable far longer than he needed to, eyes fixed somewhere past Shen Yuan. “Is that a tail.” 

Ohh, seashells. Shen Yuan glanced behind him, from where his tail was poking up out of the water, his glittering green fin clearly poking up out of the water behind him. Maybe he could get out of this. 

“No.” He lied, quickly slipping it back under the water. “What are you even talking about right now. You sound crazy.” 

The human only blinked down at him. Shen Yuan wasn’t backing down. They stayed there, staring at one another for an unknown amount of time. That is, until, the human broke the silence. 

“If I took your picture I could be rich as fuck.” The human muttered. “You are a mermaid, right?”

“Mermaid- no, sandbrain, I’m a mer man.” Shen Yuan corrected before he could realize that he just outed himself as merfolk. “I mean, no I’m not.” 

Coral Reef, that was not at all convincing. “No pictures of me.”

“But I-”

“That’s not allowed.”
“I could just-”

“You won’t be taking a picture of me.” 

As the words left his throat, Shen Yuan pressed his hand against it. What was that? He watched as the human’s eyes glazed over for a moment, and he nodded. Shen Yuan watched as the man seemed to come into himself again. He didn’t bring it back up. 

“You’re a human.” Shen Yuan rested his elbows on the ground, not caring that he got the legs and shoes of the human wet. “Can you tell me about humans? Can you bring me things?”

“Why would I- why would I do that?” The human sputtered. Hmm, weak spine. I guess that makes sense for a sea lion human. Shen Yuan poked the human’s shoes. 

“I’m a merman, and you’ve never seen a merman before, and I could… give you fish.” Shen Yuan tried to think of what he could offer. “Crabs. Not a shark, though.” What did humans like? Uhhh… metal? 

The human looked like he was having a rough time parsing through his offer. Or maybe he was still trying to parse out that Shen Yuan was a merman. Seashells, human were so close-minded. 

“Right. Merman. Can’t take a picture of this merman. But what you can do is agree, and use this as material for your writing, and then you will wake up on the beach with a concussion and find out that this was just a dream.” 

“Not a dream.” Shen Yuan informed, splashing the human with some water. “Give me things.” 

“Fine, sure, yeah, sure thing Mr. Dream-Merman.” The human held out his hand, and Shen Yuan slapped it. He had seen humans slap hands in celebration, so, there!

“My name is Shen Yuan.”

“Right, Shen Yuan the merman.”

“Who are you? Are human names secret?” Some of the arctic merfolk kept their names secret, maybe humans were the same. 

“Oh, y-yeah, I’m Shang Qinghua, the, uh, human.” 

Shen Yuan smiled, exposing all of his teeth up at the human, Shang Qinghua, who returned the gesture, nervously. He still looked like a sea lion. 

Liu Qingge, of course, was rather upset at his choice to leave the pod. He had closed his hands into fists, and argued. He argued. Threw around how he was so concerned about his safety, how he would be too close to humans, how he wasn’t going to be able to fend for himself. 

Shen Yuan of course, had made up his mind. He had a new cave-home, and a new human friend, who was going to give him things and talk to him about humans. He wasn’t going to give that up. 

Obviously, he was upset. The pod was his family, Liu Qingge most of all. The first face he had ever seen, and the one he could always count on since then. It would be rough, not seeing that face all the time, not knowing that he would always have a friend and protector. 

Though, he would also stop holding the pod back. Liu Qingge would become the leader of the fiercest hunting pod in the seas, without Shen Yuan holding everyone back, and Shen Yuan would finally have a home to live. He could collect things, and not have his collection pouch get lost in a scuffle, or fall off while travelling. He could decorate himself. 

It took a while, but Liu Qingge finally backed down, with the promise that he would visit as frequently as he could, and the odd condition that Shen Yuan wouldn’t mate into a different pod before Liu Qingge came back. He then insisted that Shen Yuan wasn’t leaving the pod at all, but rather he was still a part, even if he wasn’t with them. 

That was more than agreeable, to Shen Yuan. It made him happy to know he was so loved by his friend and his pod. He had embraced everyone he could, wary of their sharp fins and talons, and promised he would remain here until they came back. Shen Yuan took them to his cave so they would know. 

They departed as the sun set. Shen Yuan was glad, for once, for the salt water, as it rinsed away his tears. 

“So, the camera takes what you see, and then makes it permanent, which you can put on the computer, which you can print out and put it out onto the internet, which is like an invisible current that makes thoughts into images and words.” Shen Yuan fiddled with Shang Qinghua’s camera, looking through the small lens, kicking his tail up happily as he laid on his back. Next to him, Shang Qinghua nervously tried to reach for the camera. Shen Yuan pulled it away. “Nu-uh. You don’t even want it.” 

“That doesn’t mean I don’t need it.” Shang Qinghua took the camera away, and Shen Yuan pouted. “Play with one of the other things I brought you.”

Interested, Shen Yuan sat back up and looked through the pile Shang Qinghua had brought him. “I don’t understand why you’re taking pictures if you don’t want to.” Shen Yuan commented, picking up a plastic thing with lots of teeth. He ran his fingers across the teeth and laughed at the sensation. 

“Because I have to make money to live.” Shang Qinghua sighed. “Humans are forced to do things they don’t want to do so they can survive. It’s not that great of a world up here.”

Shen Yuan scoffed. “Yeah, right. You have things that you can hang on to, and stories that don’t live in the imagination, and your pictures aren’t washed away by sand, and you can eat food that isn’t fish.” Shen Yuan held out the plastic thing. “What is this, and what do I do with it?” 

“It’s a comb, bro, you brush your hair with it.” 

Oh! This is! He had been looking for this his whole life! He quickly attacked his hair with the comb, ripping it through the tangled mess. “Fuck, don’t do it like that!”

Gently, Shang Qinghua took the comb from him, and started systematically de-tangling Shen Yuan’s hair. Shen Yuan hummed happily as he did so, looking through the small collection of things Shang Qinghua had brought for him. 

A book, filled with bright, glossy pictures of different places around the world. He couldn’t read any of the words printed in the book, but he could appreciate the pictures. Buildings! Trees, vegetation, large spans of land with no water. 

Along with the book, there was a little candle that burned with fire and smelled like something called cinnamon buns. Flowers that smelled so very nice and grew on soil. 

They were all lovely gifts, but Shen Yuan wanted more of them. He wanted to taste what a cinnamon bun tasted like, because apparently the wax didn’t taste the way it smelled. He wanted to learn how to read the letters written on things, he wanted clothes like Shang Qinghua had. He wanted the internet. 

“There ya go. That should be most of the tough stuff.” Shang Qinghua handed him the comb back. Shen Yuan happily took it, and started to run it through his own hair, revelling in the feeling of it moving so silkily and smoothly through his hair. There was a clattering against his tail, and he looked down to see a small collection of pearls and other shiny jewels resting on his scales. “Dude, what!” 

Shen Yuan looked at Shang Qinghua, who was staring at his lap with wide eyes and a dropped jaw. He flapped his hands. “Do it again! Do that again!” 

Shen Yuan could only oblige, running the comb through his hair again. More jewels, seemingly from nowhere dropped from his hair and onto his tail, onto the smooth cave floor. Shen Yuan kept combing his hair, and the pearls and jewels kept tumbling down like water droplets.
In all of his life, Shen Yuan had never seen so many pearls. Never, ever all in one place. Not even when his collection was at it’s biggest did he have more than three. Shen Yuan kept combing and combing and combing. Until he put down the comb. 

Running his hands though the veritable hoard that had just dropped from his hair of all places, Shen Yuan held out a handful to Shang Qinghua. “Did you know this would happen!” 

“Fuck no, I didn’t!” Shang Qinghua eyed the bounty with greedy eyes. “Can I have some?” 

“Huh?” Shen Yuan clutched it closer to his chest, causing some to slip out and into the pond. “Why do you want these?” 

“I can sell them! For money!” Shang Qinghua’s eyes glimmered. “I-I could use the money to bring you more things! And I could use it to pay my rent so I don’t have to take pictures!”

“Then you would have time to teach me how to read!” Perfect! Shen Yuan began to shovel the gems and jewels into Shang Qinghua’s lap. “Bring me back lots of decorations!”

“Decorations?” 

“For me! To put in my hair and around my neck and on my arms?” Shen Yuan gestured all over his body. He could finally have decorations! Maybe some made from the pearls would be pretty? He combed his hair more, laughing as his friend scrambled to gather all of the treasures. 

“Jewelry! Accessories, that’s what humans call that stuff!” Shang Qinghua was stuffing his pockets. Shen Yuan nodded, and continued to comb until his arms grew too tired. 

When he was finally sick of brushing his hair, he gently put the comb back down onto the book. “Hey, tell me what this says.” Shen Yuan tipped forward into the water, and floated across the pool to the opposite side, tapping at the carving on the ground. Shang Qinghua, who had filled his jacket and bag with his hair… treasures, came stumbling over. He peered down at the carving. 

“Awh, this is so cute. I thought you didn’t know how to write?” 

Shen Yuan furrowed his brow. He didn’t know how Shang Qinghua got to that assumption. He didn’t know how to read or write. “I don’t.” 

He tapped the carving over some of the letters. “But, bro, that’s your name. Shen Yuan.” 

Quickly, Shen Yuan slammed his hands over the letters. His name! So this was his cave! He was here before he lost his memories! He knew it! He pointed excitedly to the other group of letters. “What does this one say!” 

“Luo Binghe. Is that someone’s name?” Shen Yuan frowned. Who was Luo Binghe? Was that another merperson? Did he share this cave with them? Shen Yuan ran his finger around the shape that surrounded the two names. 

“What does this mean?” He tapped the cross between the names. “And this?”

“Well, that’s a heart, so that means love. The plus, that means and or together. So as a whole, it means either ‘Shen Yuan and Luo Binghe are in love,’ or it means ‘Shen Yuan and Luo Binghe love eachother.’” 

Oh. Shen Yuan’s hand drifted to the letters that spelled ‘Luo Binghe.’ The name was the same as the cave itself, warm and sweet. It felt familiar and comforting, but Shen Yuan had no idea who it was. Somebody he knew before, obviously. He felt utterly guilty that he couldn’t remember. What if Luo Binghe had been waiting for him all of those years he was gone?
“Who’s Luo Binghe?” Shang Qinghua asked. Shen Yuan shook his head. 

“I have no idea.” He admitted. “I can’t remember anything from when I was younger.”

“Mermaids can get amnesia?” 

“I don’t know what that word means, and I’m a merman .” Shen Yuan splashed Shang Qinghua with his tail. “What does it mean?” 

“You know, you don’t have to splash me when you don’t know what a word means, I’ll tell you if you wait a second.” Shang Qinghua took a step back. “Amnesia is when you lose your memories.” 

“Oh. Yes, I have amnesia.” Shen Yuan tucked his (now so so smooth and silky hair) behind his ear. “Do you know who Luo Binghe is?” 

Shang Qinghua looked like he was thinking for a second. “There was a kid around here named Luo Binghe when I was kid. I think he moved away a long time ago, though.” 

Why was his human so useless, huh? Did they all not know things! Who was Luo Binghe! Were there so many humans in the world that he didn’t know even one? 

“If you see one, can you send him to me?” 

Shang Qinghua brought his hand to his head and then brought it back down quickly. “You got it, most auspicious benefactor. I’ll be on the lookout for any Luo Binghe. In the meantime, I have to go figure out where to sell pearls!

He watched as Shang Qinghua scrambled, graving the pearls and gems and jewels and hustling out of the cavern. Shen Yuan hoped that he would come back. Shen Yuan would feed him to Liu Qingge if he didn’t come back. 

Somehow. 

Holding his hand out in front of him, Shen Yuan marveled at the soft golden rings and pearls on his fingers. The pearls shown with a gorgeous matte shine, and the soft gold glimmered around them in their elaborate setting. 

Then, he felt the bumpy pearl necklaces around his neck. There were at least five of them, of varying lengths, falling down his chest in a silvery cascade, emphasized by the vibrant green emerald choker tossed in there. His ears were collapsed into similar emerald jewels, and his hair was tucked up with golden and jade pins. 

In his other hand, he held up a mirror. It was marine blue, just like his comb, made of plastic. He admired his own reflection in it. We was pretty. Prettier than Liu Qingge, even. Maybe it was just the decorations- the jewelry and accessories- that Shang Qinghua had managed to bring him that made him think so. He placed the mirror down on the ‘floaty’ Shang Qinghua had bought him, and turned to said friend, who was lounging on a matching floaty in the pool. 

“Do you have enough yet to stop taking pictures?” Shen Yuan asked, looking at his cavern walls. Over the moon cycles, Shang Qinghua had bought him lots of presents, some were pictures that were in frames, and he put them on the walls. With a ‘hammer’ and some ‘nails’ he said. Noisy business. 

“I do, actually. Thank you, Cucumber-bro.” Shen Yuan scoffed. He didn’t like that name. He got excited over the first ground vegetable Shang QInghua bought him, it wouldn’t have been such a big deal if it didn’t ‘match his tail’ or whatever. It wasn’t even his favorite ground-vegetable. 

His favorite ground vegetable was the potato, especially when it was made into fries. Though, he wouldn’t want to be called ‘Potato-bro’ either. 

In revenge, Shen Yuan called him ‘Airplane-bro.’ The airplanes were the great machines in the sky that traveled from one place to another faster than boats or cars. Shen Yuan called him that because his head was all the way up in the sky, like the airplanes. He was dumb. 

Yet he was also, his bro. 

His friend stretched his arms and put them behind his head. “Yep, I have enough to retire in comfort. No need for me to see you anymore.”

“Airplane-bro.” Shen Yuan edged his tail under Shang Qinghua’s floatie. Shang Qinghua’s eyes were wide as oysters, as he knew this move from before. He could ‘flip a bitch’ and Shang Qinghua couldn’t do anything about it. “You’re in it now, ‘rat bastard.’” 

“H-Hey, you look pretty!” Shang Qinghua stutered out quickly, trying to save himself. Hah. clever move. Shen Yuan was pretty, but that wasn’t going to distract him this time! Shen Yuan knows what he looks like, hah! Shen Yuan pushed up on the floatie. Shang Qinghua scrambled.
“I was joking! Joking!” Shen Yuan smirked, and dropped the floatie. 

“You would miss me too much.” Shen Yuan twirled a strand of hair on his finger. “I would put a merfolk curse on you.”

“Can you curse people?” 

“Dunno. I had no idea pearls fell from my hair when I brushed it.” He paddled over to the edge of the pool, and picked up the new book Shang Qinghua had bought for him. It was human romance. Totally, totally different from merfolk mating rituals. Where was the demonstration of worth? Where were the rituals of approval from the pod? So weird. It was sweet, though. Some of it was absolutely weird and bad though. Humans were weird. 

At least he was able to make it through a big portion of the book by himself. He was getting a lot better at reading, haha. He was practically human already!

“Have you found Luo Binghe?”
“Again, like the last thousand times, no, I haven’t.”

“Try harder.”

“You know I have a life outside of you, Cucumber-bro.” 

“You do not.” Shen Yuan knew that Shang Qinghua was a ‘total incel loser,’ in his own words. Shen Yuan was inclined to agree. “I’m the most interesting thing in your life.” 

“Well, you are literally a creature that I had thought was fictional until I was nine years old.” 

“See? Interesting. Tell me more about dogs.”
“I’m not google!”

“I wouldn’t have to keep asking you if I actually had google.” 

“I don’t even want to have to deal with the logistics of giving you the internet, or even an internet-capable device.” 

“Hmmm. Coward.” 

“Yep, I sure am!” 

“I know. Get over here and teach me more words.” 

“Aye, aye, Cucumber-bro.” 

“I could drown you so easy.”

“Aww, I love you too.”

It had been a full ‘year’ since Shen Yuan started to live in his cave. He didn’t regret his decision one bit, not one. Certainly, there were times he missed his pod. He often found himself lying against the carving on the floor, his hand resting in the heart shape,wondering how they were all doing. Did Liu Qingge have a mate yet? What about Liu Mingyan? Her coming of age should have happened. 

Though he wouldn’t want to return to his old life. No fucking way. His cavern was now his home. It may have always been, but now it was more his than ever. He had a real, genuine collection! He had pillows, and blankets, and paintings, and pictures, and books. Oh, his books. Classic books, fairytale books, nonfiction books. His favorite were the trashy, terrible, no-talent and classless romance novels. 

He had a collection of accessories, and some mirrors, and some nicer combs. Floaties for himself and Shang Qinghua, and a cooler than his friend would fill with food. 

The food was by far his favorite part of having a human friend. Shen Yuan almost never wanted to eat fish again. There were juices, and there were sodas, and milk, and tea. There were vegetables, red meats, and cooked meat! Noodles, and desserts and soups. Shen Yuan was in love with the food that the humans made. He was in love with most things that humans made. They were stupid, idiot creatures that made the best things ever. 

Over the year, Shang Qinghua was able to stop taking pictures, with Shen Yuan’s hair-jewels as his main source of income. He was able to write, and even though Shang Qinghua wouldn’t let him read any of his words yet, Shen Yuan was certain that they would be as endearing and messy as the man himself. 

Yeah, Shen Yuan was very happy with his new home. Today, on the anniversary of his arrival, he was certain his choice was the right one to make. Yes, yes. 

“Bro!” 

Even from where he was basking on the sandy bottom of the pool, playing with the underwater camera Shang Qinghua had grabbed for him, Shen Yuan could hear his friend’s excited voice carry through the cave. He quickly swam up to the surface, watching him scramble up the slope to reach the cave. “Where’s the fire?” 

Shang Qinghua stumbled up to the pool with a large, excited grin. “Excellent use of the phrase, bro. Nailed it.” 

“Of course I did.” He slapped the top of the water. “Why’re you so excited?” 

“It’s Luo Binghe!” Shang Qinghua announced. Shen Yuan’s body suddenly thrummed with energy. “He’s back in town for a while, something about something I wasn’t listening, but he’s here!” 

“Bring him here!” Shen Yuan demanded, swimming up to Shang Qinghua and grabbing his pant leg. “What’s he like?” 

“Uh, bro, I don’t think that’s a very good idea? How the hell would I get a perfect stranger to come to some remote beach cavern alone.” 

Shen Yuan didn’t think that it was too difficult. “He knows me, tell him I’m here.”

“Well, we don’t actually know if he knows you?” 

“He loves me?” Shen Yuan gestured to the carving. “He knows me.”
“That’s not really… proof? And again, he’s a perfect stranger. I can’t say: ‘Hey guy, were you friends with a merman when you were a kid because I found him and he wants to meet you.’ ”

Shen Yuan pressed a hand to his chin. Hm. Knowing now what he knows about human conventions, that was probably not a very good idea. 

It was, of course, at that moment that he heard the far-off call of his pod returning. 

Chapter Text

When Luo Binghe was a child, he had an imaginary friend. 

The other kids in his ocean-side town didn’t like him very much at all. They would  exclude him from groups in class, and during playtime they would push him down and step on his fingers, kick him in the stomach, and pull his hair. His teachers put a stop to the violence at school, but that didn’t stop it from following him home. 

They would follow him as he walked home, pushing him into trees and tripping him onto paths,and would continue kicking and yelling at him. He didn’t understand why he was the subject of such ire. They called him ‘poor,’ ‘pathetic,’ ‘unwanted,’ ‘dirty,’ and ‘rotten.’ They would even toss around the word ‘adopted’ as if it were a bad word. 

As if Luo Binghe’s mother wasn’t the only bright spot in his horrible world. 

She was the one who would come back from her jobs at night, utterly exhausted and burnt out, and still had the time to bandage his injuries, cook him dinner, and tuck him in. Whether or not she gave birth to him, she was his mother, no matter what. She loved him and he loved her. 

For the longest time it was them against the world, she was all that he had. 

Until one day, when his classmates were feeling particularly vicious, throwing stones at him as they chased him down paths he didn’t know or recognize. He had to make a split-second decision to change his path. They all knew where he lived, they could and would chase him down there and past. He couldn't shake them on those roads. 

So, he made a left rather than a right, and sprinted as fast and as far as his feet could take him down the beach. He didn’t stop when he cut his feet on seashells, not when a sharp rock hit him at the base of his skull, not when he tripped forward into the chilly, shallow waters of the rocks down the beach. 

It was there, down the beach and across the rocks, in a small cave carved into the side of the cliff by erosion, where he met his friend for the first time. 

He was far from prepared, as he stumbled into the cave bleeding and sobbing, to see the most beautiful person he had ever seen in his entire life.

Like a picture from a book, Luo Binghe saw his merman for the first time. The merman was young, like himself, small, not yet grown into anything at all. His hair was dark, dark like the ink from the ballpoint pens his mother used to write in her journals. His eyes shone like pearls, gleaming and green, prettier than anything he had ever seen. His skin was pale as paper, and his tail was beyond anything Luo Binghe could describe. 

Glittering like the sunset over the ocean, but in a fresh collection of greens, teals, pale golds and silvers that didn’t occur anywhere in the natural world. Obviously, this creature was beyond the natural world, a spirit, or just as it appeared: a merman. 

The mermaid had turned to him, blinking his otherworldly eyes at Luo Binghe, who had fallen to his knees as he tripped over his own feet. 

“What are you doing down there?” 

The way that he spoke sounded like music, like pearls rolling in a smooth, shallow bowl. 

“Are you sad? Come over here, come over here.” Luo Binghe still stared stupidly as the merman beckoned him closer, waving his arms. “Hurry, hurry, I can help you feel better!” 

Unthinkingly, Luo Binghe obeyed, crawling around the large, shimmering pool in the middle of the carven until he was right in front of the merman. The merman smiled at him, and Luo Binghe thought his smile looked like the sun. 

The merman took Luo Binghe’s head in his hands, and pulled it towards him, nuzzling his nose against Luo Binghe’s then moving all around his face, nuzzling his cheeks, his eyes, his neck. Luo Binghe had absolutely no clue what he was supposed to do, but he felt his head clear and his eyes dry up. Even the sharp pain on his hands, knees, and feet had dulled to nothing. 

“There, all fixed.” The merman patted his cheek. “What’s your name?” 

“L-Luo Binghe?” He said, his voice small in the face of such extreme beauty. Really, like he was pulled from the pages of a storybook. 

“Luo Binghe.” The merman tugged at his ears. “I’m Shen Yuan.” 

Shen Yuan, Shen Yuan, Shen Yuan. 

“Are you a merman?” Luo Binghe asked, pulling himself up onto his knees in a kneeling position. He wanted to know more about his new friend!

“Kind of.” Shen Yuan flapped his tail. “I’m a Siren, which is a certain type of merperson.”

“ A Siren?” Luo Binghe could only think about the loud police sirens, the tsunami sirens. Never  a mermaid Siren, not that he knew about. “What’s a Siren?” 

“A Siren is the most pretty merfolk in the sea.” Shen Yuan declared. “Sirens are pretty like humans, and we can do magic!” 

“You’re the prettiest person I’ve ever seen in my life.” Luo Binghe admitted. He watched as Shen Yuan turned pink, grabbing a lock of his hair and twisting it in between his hands. 

“Y-You think so?” Shen Yuan asked. Luo Binghe nodded quickly. 

“I’ve never seen anything or anyone that even comes close!” He looked over the shimmering tail again. Yeah, never. Shen Yuan’s tail kicked out a few times, splashing the water. 

“You’re pretty too.” Shen Yuan admitted, his voice quiet. Luo Binghe didn’t believe that for a second, but he blushed anyway. Only his mother had ever said anything like that to him before. Shen Yuan leaned over and tapped Luo Binghe’s leg. “I healed up your cuts.”

“You did?” Luo Binghe swung his legs out from under him and looked at the scrapes and bruises, which had vanished. “How did you do that!”

“I kissed you.” 

The blood rushed to his face. A kiss! Luo Binghe wasn’t old enough to kiss! He would remember if Shen Yuan kissed him! “You didn’t kiss me!”

“I sure did. Not a mouth-kiss, but I gave you a merfolk kiss.” Shen Yuan grabbed Luo BInghe’s piping-hot face and repeated the nuzzling gesture from before. “Siren kisses can heal people.” 

“Th-tha-that’s-! I’m not old enough to kiss!” Luo BInghe quickly scrambled back. His merman companion looked offended. 

“You don’t want my kisses? They made you better!” 

Wanting to make Shen Yuan feel better, Luo Binghe acted quickly. “N-No! I’m just not old enough! You’re not old enough to kiss either!” 

“I’m getting married.” Shen Yuan sniffed, and crossed his arms. 

Married!?

Why was someone as young as him getting married! Marriage was for grownups!

“You’re getting married!?” Luo Binghe couldn't imagine getting married so young! He hadn’t- well- he had just had his first kiss, but getting married was too much!

“I don’t even know what ‘married’ is, but my parents said it’s like mating. I’m supposed to be married to the Selkie King. But my parents say I’m too young to get married to the Selkie King so I’m supposed to stay here so I don’t have to get married.” 

“So you’re… not getting married?” 

“Guess not.” Shen Yuan shrugged. “Why were you hurt?” 

Shen Yuan tipped forward onto his tummy, crossing his arms on Luo Binghe’s knees and resting his chin on top of it. Luo Binghe sputtered. Shen Yuan shushed him. “Why?”

“...The other kids at school chased me down.” He confessed. Shen Yuan frowned up at him. “They don’t like me, so they pick on me and hurt me.” He felt himself getting choked up.

Why didn’t anyone like him? Why were they all bullying him? What was he doing wrong? 

His tail slapped the cavern floor. “You’re pretty and nice, why don’t they like you?” 

He sniffled pathetically. “I don’t know.” 

“I like you.” Shen Yuan said, simply. Luo Binghe blinked down at him. Shen Yuan smiled. “You’re my friend now. Once I grow into my voice I can protect you from other kids.” 

It felt so, so nice to hear that from another person, even if the person was a merman. He scooped Shen Yuan into his arms and into a hug. The merman melted against him, returning the hug just as tightly.

“You’re warm.” Shen Yuan murmured against his neck. Luo Binghe smiled and blinked away his tears. 

They stayed in that embrace for a while, and part way through, Shen Yuan started to hum, and Luo Binghe began to run his hands through his hair. It was a little tangled, but after a while, Luo Binghe had unknotted it all, and was playing with the silky smooth locks. It was so soft. 

Luo Binghe thought he might be in love. 

“Do you wanna live here with me?” Shen Yuan asked, his voice thick with sleepiness. “Could get you fish, and you could keep me warm. And bring me presents.”

“I’m not old enough to live without my mother.” 

He listened to Shen Yuan’s silence, his humming stopped. “I’m not either.”

Then, there was a slight sniffle. Panicked, Luo Binghe pulled back and held him up, looking at his new friend’s watery eyes. He quickly rubbed them free of any of the tears that had gathered there. “I can come visit you every day, and I can bring you presents!” 

The sorrow in Shen Yuan’s eyes melted into hope. “Promise?”

“I promise!” 

Things changed for Luo Binghe  after that day. He went home and told his mom excitedly about his new merman friend, and she smiled indulgently at him, gave him dinner and sent him to bed. 

In the days that followed, he would always find time to visit Shen Yuan. 

Sometimes, he would parcel up his meager breakfast and leave early in the morning to see Shen Yuan. He would share his breakfast with his friend, and they would talk about their dreams. On occasion, they would swim in his pond, making Binghe smell like the ocean for school. 

Other times, he would visit after school, and he would bring little things that he took from the lost-and-found. Like a notebook and a pen, a beaten-up book about vampires, and an old stuffed dog. With everything he brought, Shen Yuan would always gasp in delight, and ask tons and tons of questions. When Luo Binghe was able to answer them, he felt smarter than he ever did during school. When the sun started to go down, Shen Yuan would dive under the water and bring back a fish for Luo Binghe to take to his mother. 

This routine was unbroken until the Summer break came around, and Luo Binghe spent all of his time with Shen Yuan, in the cavern, or sometimes even further out in the sea. Luo Binghe never had to worry about drowning, as he had his best friend and personal flotation device right there. Luo Binghe had never had so much fun in his life. 

And Luo Binghe was absolutely certain now: he was in love with Shen Yuan, and he was going to marry him when they grew up. 

He told him as much one day, when they were both floating on their backs in the pool, hands intertwined. 

“You love me?” Shen Yuan squeezed Luo Binghe’s hand, and pulled him by that hand so his torso was pressed right up against Shen Yuan’s own. He had to kick his feet to stay floating, looking into his gorgeous green eyes. Shen Yuan’s smile was bright and blinding. “You love me?”

“I love you.” Luo Binghe nodded his head. “I love you a lot.” 

“You want to be my mate?” Shen Yuan grabbed his other hand. Luo Binghe squeezed both of them, and nodded again. “We’re not old enough!”
“I can wait!” Luo Binghe would wait. He would wait for as long as he needed to. He was certain that he would never meet anyone like Shen Yuan, and not only because he was a merman. “I’ll build a huge house on the coastline, and they’ll be a tunnel that leads right to the ocean, and we can live there together.” 

“Can we get rings? Like humans do?” Shen Yuan bounced their hands together.

“I’ll get you the prettiest ring in the world.” Luo Binghe was already imagining it. 

“And we can have our own baby younglings, and we can kiss!” 

“Y-Yeah! We can do those things!” 

“We can kiss right now!” Shen Yuan nuzzled Luo Binghe’s face, causing him to giggle happily. Shen Yuan pulled back. “I love you too, Binghe! Hold on, hold on.” 

There was a loud splash as Shen Yuan dived beneath the water. Luo Binghe swam over to the cavern floor and pulled himself out of the pool, feeling warm and buzzing with the high of love. 

Love! Luo Binghe and Shen Yuan were in love and loved each other, and they were going to get married. He happily kicked his feet in the water, his face hurting due to the intensity of his grin. 

Ten years old, and he was already engaged! To the best, nicest, most beautiful, amazing person in the entire world. Take that, everyone else. Luo Binghe didn’t need anyone else’s approval, not as long as he had Shen Yuan and his mom. 

There was another great splash as Shen Yuan broke the water, in his hand there was a sharp rock. He quickly hauled himself  up next to Luo Binghe and patted the unmarred cave floor. “Write it down.” 

“Write it down?” 

“That we love each other.” Shen Yuan slapped the ground. “So that way everyone knows that we’re in love.” 

“Write it- write it in the stone?” Luo BInghe had been raised not to be a vandal. Not to carve his initials into desks or trees, not to paint on things that weren’t his own.

“This is my cave, and I want it to say that we love each other. If… If my parents ever come back, then I’ll have proof that I’m getting married to somebody that isn’t the Selkie King.” 

Luo Binghe frowned at the reminder that Shen Yuan was already promised to somebody else. He picked up the rock and carved his name and Shen Yuan’s name into the rock, then drew a great big heart around the both of them. 

There. See if anyone could try and get married to his Shen Yuan now. His mother always said that nothing was ‘written in stone.’ Well now, their love was written in stone, and nothing was going to take it away from them. He watched as Shen Yuan sighed and rested his head against the carving, pressing his cheek into the grooves. 

“I want to grow up fast.” Shen Yuan muttered, tracing the characters with a finger. “I’ll get so many cool powers, and then we can get married.”

“What kind of powers do you get, A-Yuan?” Luo Binghe laid down next to him. 

“When I come of age, pearls and gems will fall out of my hair when I brush it.” He smiled at Binghe. “You can have them. I’ll only keep a little so I can use them as decorations.” 

“Of course.” Binghe nodded seriously. “What else?” 

“I’ll be able to grant wishes with my tears, and I’ll be able to use my  voice to get people to do whatever I want.” Shen Yuan reached over to Binghe, and gently ran his fingers through  his hair. He smiled and pressed his head into the soothing touch. “If I sing then I can captivate whole groups of people, whole boats. That’s what Sirens are supposed to do.” 

“You’ll sing for people?” Luo Binghe felt jealous. He wanted to keep Shen Yuan for himself. Everyone else was so cruel and mean, why did they deserve to have his Shen Yuan? This was his merman, he was too good for anyone else. Luo Binghe wanted to keep him all to himself. 

“That’s so much effort. As long as I have Binghe, why would I need to lead sailors to their devastation?” Shen Yuan nuzzled his cheek again. “I can sing for you, though?” 

“Please, please, please.” Luo Binghe grabbed Shen Yuan and pulled him close, squeezing him like he was a pillow. Like he was a Shen Yuan. Shen Yuan hummed. “You’ll never have to do anything as long as I’m here.” 

It was in that moment, as those words left his mouth, that he realized that while Luo Binghe had his mother, his teachers (even if he didn’t trust them), his Shen Yuan was all alone here in this cave. He would make sure that Shen Yuan was never lonely. 

Though, like most vows and promises made in childhood, it was broken. 

Things broke apart one day, the day school began again. Luo Binghe had blessedly not had any other run-ins with his fellow students over the summer holliday, but the day that  school began again, Ming Fan apparently thought it was time to return to his old hobby. Though this time, a few scrapes and bruises weren’t enough. 

No, this time Ming Fan and his posse had decided to up the ante. Black and blue. And by the time Luo Binghe had finally broken free from them after the initial beating, Luo Binghe ran away. He was followed.  Even when he tried to take his typical escape route to the beach, he was followed. His heart pounded with exertion and fear. 

They couldn’t follow him, they couldn’t follow him. He kept whispering that to himself as he scrambled away, like the first time, tripping and cutting himself and bleeding into the shallow waters. 

He was followed. They followed him down the beach across the rocks. The followed him as he panic blindly led him to Shen Yuan’s cavern, stumbling up and up trying in vain to get away, to get to his safety. Shen Yuan would protect him, Shen Yuan would make him feel better, he would kiss him and all the pain would go away, and then Luo Binghe would hold him close and everything would be okay. 

Shen Yuan startled when Luo Binghe barreled into the cavern. He was in the middle of pulling himself up out of the pool, but stopped dead when Luo Binghe fell down in front of him. Binghe crawled to the side of the pool. 

“A-Yuan, c-can you kiss me? P-Please!” Luo Binghe begged, looking at his loved one’s panicked face. Shen Yuan nodded, and took Luo Binghe;s head in his hand, and moved to kiss him, when voices sounded from the mouth of the cavern. 

Luo Binghe’s heart dropped, and he immediately pulled away, to stumble and tumble to the back of the cave, sticking to the back, as far away from them as possible. 

“Who are they?” Shen Yuan asked, looking between Luo Binghe and the others. “Bad?” 

“B-Bad.” Luo Binghe nodded his head. 

“Were they the ones who hurt you?” Shen Yuan’s eyes narrowed, and they flashed a bright yellow. “Did they hurt you again?” 

“Y-Yes.” 

His head whipped back around, and the group was getting closer. Shen Yuan heaved himself up out of the water, so that his human-half was out of the pool, supported by his arms. 

“Leave him alone!” 

The voice that left Shen Yuan’s mouth was his, but it was different too. It filled the air around him as if it was the oxygen itself, penetrating not only his eardrums, but his bones. Shen Yuan’s voice was everywhere, loud and everything. 

The last thing Luo Binghe saw before he fell unconscious, was Shen Yuan’s arms giving out from under him, the Siren slipping and falling, hitting his head on the side of the pool, and slipping beneath the water. 

When Luo Binghe woke up, he was in the hospital, his mother fretting at his bedside. His first instinct was to cast aside the flimsy hospital blanket and go running, was Shen Yuan okay? Did he- did the others find him? What did they do, what would they do? 

He was, of course, not allowed to do that, and had to sit through the doctors telling him that he had gone into shock, and that’s why he passed out. He nodded along to the things his mother said, to the things the doctor said, all the while worrying about his Shen Yuan. 

It was an agonizing night, and an even more agonizing morning when he went to the cove, despite his mother telling him to stay away, and he didn’t see Shen Yuan. He didn’t show up there, even when he yelled and cried and pleaded. Shen Yuan didn’t show up. 

The silver lining, if it could even be called that, was that nobody bothered him at school, or after. 

Nobody bothered him ever again, actually. 

Shen Yuan never came back either. 

Not for the four years after, when Luo Binghe visited the cave everyday. Though, as time wore on, and Shen Yuan’s absence was felt more and more, Luo Binghe had to wonder if the merman was even real to begin with. All he really had was the carving on the floor, and the notebook filled with salty, crusty pages and sloppy illegible script. 

When Luo Binghe’s mother died, there was nothing to stop him from being whisked away by the foster system, far away from the town he grew up in. 

Far away from the coast, far away from the cave in the side of the cliff, down the beach and across the rocks. 

Far away from the Siren he could only rationalize as a figment of his imagination.

It was only seven years later that he came back to his hometown. 

Now a successful celebrity chef, an eligible bachelor, an heir to a fortune he didn’t want any part of, Luo Binghe found that the life of the big city drained him. He longed to return to the coastline, to the sea he adored so in his youth. 

Even if it was just the sea he was returning for. Even if it was a return to a place without the warmth of his mother, a place without the first love he made for himself, it was a place with sweet air and a sunset that reminded him of boys with scales he still had nothing to compare to. 

When he arrived back, it seemed like nothing in the town had changed. Of course, signs were repainted, cars had evolved, new businesses had sprung up here and there, but at its core it still felt the same, and Luo Binghe was glad for it. 

It was utterly and entirely refreshing to go into the supermarket and be recognized only as ‘Auntie Luo’s boy,’ and allowed to go about his business in peace. The small stores were filled with everything he needed, fresh and organic produce and other goods. The fish market was his favorite part of the whole day, seeing all of the raw fish lined up so delightfully was extremely nostalgic. 

By far the oddest part of his day when he was in a local bakery, inquiring about job openings. When the owner asked him for his name and number, he told her, and the other man in the shop dropped the box of cinnamon rolls he was holding. Luo Binghe didn’t recognise him, but he had been gone a significant number of years. 

The cinnamon roll-dropper was round in the stomach and arms, with lopsided glasses and a bad haircut. Luo Binghe had offered to help him clean up the mess, but the man stuttered and declined his assistance, scooping up the buns, frosting and all, and shoving them into a box and leaving hurriedly, almost tripping on his own feet, muttering something about “I have to tell him, oh my god what are the odds?” 

It was easy to write that encounter off, and Luo Binghe didn’t give it any more thought. Not for the rest of the day. Once the house he was renting, maybe possibly buying, was stocked up with his groceries and other miscellany, Luo Binghe was plagued by thoughts of the seaside cavern that was the home to his first love.

It was crazy, he knew that. Merpeople weren’t real. Shen Yuan wasn’t real. Shen Yuan was a figment of his lonely imagination, made up to give him someone else to love, someone else to love him. Luo Binghe knew it was love, even if it was of his own devising. 

Pathetic as it was, on every date he went on, he would always look into the other person’s eyes and look for that glimmer, that shine of green and flash of gold. A merman he had made up when he was ten years old became his standard, and nobody ever since had been able to meet it. 

Ah, but he was still young, foolish. He had all the time in the world to find another Shen Yuan. A real one this time. With legs. Not a tail that rivaled all the gems in the world. 

Idly, Luo Binghe fiddled with the ring on his finger. It had been one of his first purchases when he crossed the threshold of ‘financially stable’ into ‘wealthy.’ It was a fine ring, light gold woven with pale silver, and set with a multitude of rare gems Luo Binghe had long forgotten the names of. It was the closest thing he had been able to find to the scales of Shen Yuan’s tail. 

Had Luo Binghe been an artist, and he certainly was not, perhaps he would have been able to immortalize his memory in visual form.Though, like the selfish young boy he had been all those years ago, he wanted to keep the vision to himself. 

As he started out the window of his house, he tried to keep his thoughts from straying to the cavern. He knew he could go there. He could go there right now, the path was carved into his heart and his mind. He shouldn’t go back. 

Though, why not? 

Part of him was worried that something had happened to it. Maybe the carving on the floor had been destroyed. Maybe other people had found it and carved their own initials into the cave. Maybe the entrance had closed up, maybe it was filled with litter and debris. 

The other, bigger part of him wanted to return to the home of some of his happiest memories of his past. Made up as they may be, the feelings were real. 

Well, what was the harm in a little nostalgic self-indulgence? 

He threw on a light jacket and left his house, letting his feet carry him on instinct, guided by memory as he stared at the sunset over the sea. Ah, this is what he had been missing. This is what he needed. 

In what seemed like no time at all, he was heading down the beach. As he walked past families playing with one another, couples on strolls, Luo Binghe found himself blinking back tears. Ah, the power of memory. He could just see a little Binghe, his arms laden with second hand treasures as he clumsily trod across the sand. 

When he reached the path of rocks, he found it just as simple to cross as he did when he was younger. Not easy at all. Slick, sharp, with the tides rising and tugging out his ankles. If anything, navigating it as an adult was more daunting, the fall down to the jagged stones below seemed a lot further from higher up. 

By the time he was at the mouth of the entrance to the cavern, he was both excited and terrified. Whatever he saw in there, it would most effect some of the warmest memories from his childhood. For better or for worse, it would be something of a gamble. He pushed aside his worries. 

Damnit, he was an adult! He would do this no problem, no questions, no problem. 

He bravely pressed on. The slope up into the cave felt both larger and smaller than before. When he arrived into the main cave, he didn’t know… exactly what he was looking at, or how he felt about it. 

Confused, was a good word. He felt confused. 

It looked as if someone was living there. There were framed pictures on the wall, a stack of books and magazines, a cooler. There were multiple floaties by the pool, and one in it, shaped like a donut. There were knick knacks and toys scattered about, a set of calligraphy tools and a sizable jewelry box and an odd collection of mirrors. There was also an area that looked somewhat like a bed, cushions and pillows and blankets collected by the dozen. 

Maybe… not lived here. It looked more like a clubhouse of some kind. Luo Binghe walked inside, taking care not to disturb any of the possessions. 

He couldn’t help but smile when he saw that the carving was untouched, displayed clearly on the cave floor. It looked just the same as it had all of those years ago. He felt a swell of gratitude for whoever was using this place as a clubhouse, for respecting the original owner, even if he was a mermaid who lived in Luo Binghe’s childbrain. 

He knelt down and brushed his hand over the characters he had written eleven years ago.

Ah, A-Yuan, where did you go? When you left him all those years ago, what happened? Did you end up marrying the Selkie King after all? No, Luo Binghe wouldn’t let that happen. Though, he didn’t really have any control. If Luo Binghe had his way, his Shen Yuan wouldn’t have vanished. Curse his brain. 

His musings were cruelly interrupted when there was off-key whistling coming from the entrance of the cave. Luo Binghe looked to see the man from the bakery cheerfully walking in, a light purple bakery box held in his hands. 

“Are those the same rolls you dropped on the floor?” Luo Binghe asked, slightly dreading the answer. The man startled and stumbles, dropping the box on the ground, yet again. 

“Fuck! No, they were new!” The man fell to his knees, and opened the box. He breathed in a great sigh of relief and closed the box. He looked back up at Luo Binghe. “Uh, hey, how did you get here?” 

“I walked.” Luo Binghe stood up. “I didn’t know that this place was… your house?” Luo Binghe hazarded. The man shook his head and stood up. 

“No- no it’s not my house. I don’t live here.” He pushed up his glasses. “How did you- how did you know about this place?” 

Hmm. Luo Binghe didn’t really know how to answer that. He couldn’t really say that he spent time here with his imaginary merman finance when he was a kid. Instead he opted for a practical lie. “I came here a lot when I was a kid.” He tapped the carving with his foot, hoping the man wouldn’t ask him who Shen Yuan was. 

“So you are the Luo Binghe!” The man placed the cinnamon buns by the pool. “I’m Shang Qinghua.” The man walked over and stuck out his hand. Luo Binghe shook it with an odd smile. 

What did he mean the Luo Binghe? 

“You should come back here tomorrow, around noon!” Shang Qinghua nodded. “Yeah, that time works. That’s when you should come back here.”

“Uh, why?” Luo Binghe asked. Shen Yuan looked like he was scrambling to find an answer, which was not at all reassuring. 

“You, uh, seem like you have a lot of sentimental attachment to this place, and I know that nobody is going to be here around that time, so you can have a moment to yourself with the place!” He nodded, seeming very satisfied. “And I won’t be around.”

“Do lots of people come here?” Luo Binghe didn’t care very much for that. Shang Qinghua shook his head. 

“No no, not at all! Just me and a friend.” Shang Qinghua turned back and around, leaving fast. “That’s a good time! Come then!” 

Luo Binghe watched, perplexed as Shang Qinghua left him alone. 

Though he wasn’t entirely sure what he was getting into, Luo Binghe did go back to the cave the next day at noon. It was prettier then, of course, with light filtering down onto the pool. Luo Binghe sighed, and sat next to the carving. He ran his hands over the words once again. 

He glanced around, looking at the place. It was hardly his anymore. It felt like someone else's. 

Oddly enough, it wasn’t a bad sort of strange. It was comfortable and warm, the way the cave was now. Endearing, even, how things were messily packed away onto low shelves, how the books were wrinkled by saltwater. The box that Shang Qinghua had left was oddly empty. 

As was the cave itself. Empty, quiet, lonely. As it had been since the day Shen Yuan slipped under the water and Luo Binghe woke up in the hospital. Empty, quiet, and lonely. 

Until the surface of the still water in the pool broke abruptly, splashing Luo Binghe as something, someone, came from below. 

Oh .

It was- it- it had to be his Shen Yuan. 

Hair like ink, now so so long, cascading down the same, paper-pale skin, the ends floating delicate and ethereally in the water. His eyes were close, dark and long eyelashes resting against soft, defined cheekbones that were gently flushed pink. Lips, shaped perfectly, a seashell pink, parted slightly. 

He was decorated, too. Necklaces hung from his pale neck, strings of pearls falling down his chest, obscuring the  perfect form of his chest and  torso. Other pearl stings hung from his arms, his wrists, mingling with other bracelets. Rings on delicate fingers on dainty hands, reaching up to push hair away from his face, revealing delicate and shining clips and combs. 

“Shang Qinghua, what were the human words to tell someone to leave you alone? Fuck off-?” 

Shen Yuan, it had to be Shen Yuan, cut himself off as he opened his eyes, looking at Luo Binghe for the first time. Those eyes, those eyes, those eyes. Sparkling. 

It was utterly underinable, this was his Shen Yuan. 

Words died on his tongue, and he could only stare. The sensation seemed to be mutual. Shen Yuan said nothing as well. Luo Binghe didn’t know what he was supposed to say. 

“You’re prettier than I am.” Were the first words to come out of his mouth. Luo Binghe barked out a helpless laugh, and fell forward onto his knees. His eyes were wet, tears slipping out from them. 

Shen Yuan swam closer, and brushed his tears away with his delicate hands, a gesture that was so achingly familiar it only caused more tears to fall. 

“Are you sad? Why are you crying!” Shen Yuan asked, and Luo Binghe sobbed. “Hey, hey, I don’t know what I did but I’m sorry!” 

“You- you shouldn’t lie.” Luo Binghe said dumbly. Shen Yuan frowned. 

“What? I’m not lying!”

“Nobody could ever be prettier than you.” Luo Binghe nodded, gently placing his own hands on the side of Shen Yuan’s face. He watched, elated as Shen Yuan’s cheeks colored. 

This was his fiance, right? They never broke off their engagement. They were old enough now to get married. They were old enough to mouth-kiss now. 

“You- that’s- maybe!” Shen Yuan sunk down into the water. “Why are you in my house?”

“I was looking for you.” Luo Binghe wanted to pull him out of the water, so he could look at him. His tail. Shen Yuan tilted his head, and came up from the water. 

“You were looking for me?” Shen Yuan’s eyes widened and he moved in close, and took Luo Binghe’s hands into his own. “Do you know me? Or-” His expression suddenly changed, and he dropped his hands and zipped to the far side of the pool. “Did you want to sell me?”

“Sell you?”

“Shang Qinghua said that people would want to cut me open and put me in science.” 

“No, no! I don’t want to sell you!” Luo Binghe fumbled with the ring on his hand, quickly sleeping it off and holding it up to Shen Yuan. “I want to marry you!” 

“Marry?” Shen Yuan eyed the ring. He swam a little closer, eyeing the ring and Luo Binghe in equal measure. “Marriage is something humans do, not something merfolk do.”
Luo Binghe frowned. “What about the Selkie King?” 

“What’s the Selkie King?” Shen Yuan asked, before his eyes shined. “Is Luo Binghe the Selkie King?” 

Huh?

Shen Yuan swam closer. “I’m not mating or marrying anyone until I learn who Luo Binghe is.” Shen Yuan tapped the carving with purpose. “We love each other.” 

Luo Binghe, who was sitting right in front of Shen Yuan, felt his heart in his throat. 

“You- you don’t remember Luo Binghe?” 

Shen Yuan shook his head, flinging water droplets as he did so. “I don’t remember anything from before Liu Qingge found me. It’s a ‘bitch,’ but Shang Qinghua is helping me find Luo Binghe.” 

“A-Yuan,” Luo Binghe felt his heart splitter. 

All those years, was that injury real? Shen Yuan hit his head that day, did it cause amnesia? Shen Yuan had no memory of their time together. He felt like crying again. Still, even if he didn’t remember, Shen Yuan had found his way back. Luo Binghe also found his way back. They had found their way back to each other, and Shen Yuan had been real this whole time, and Luo Binghe still loved him. How could he not?
“I’m Luo Binghe.” 

Through misty eyes, he watched Shen Yuan’s eyes widen and his jaw drop. In a flash, He found himself soaking wet with a lapful of Siren. Shen Yuan smushed his face between his hands. 

“Do we love each other?” 

“I love you a lot.” Luo Binghe nodded, fighting back his tears. 

“Stop- stop crying!” Shen Yuan hiccuped on his own sob. “Why are you crying if you love me?” 

“Why are you crying?” Luo Binghe asked gently, wiping the tears away. They shined unnaturally, not unlike mercury. 

“I’m not crying!” 

“You are crying.” 

“I don’t know!” Shen Yuan brought in his face to Luo Binghe’s own, and like those times years and years ago, rubbed their noses together. Shen Yuan then moved to his cheeks, mermaid kissing him. Luo Binghe felt emotions overflowing again, but it was just joy and love as his tears dried up, and his heartache lessened. 

Shen Yuan pulled back with a gasp, his eyes shone yellow, as they did once. “Binghe!” 

“A-Yuan?” Luo Binghe gasped, not daring to hope. Though, Shen Yuan just nodded his head. 

“We’re old enough to mouth-kiss now, right?” Shen Yuan asked, then shook his head. “Of course we are.”

And before Luo Binghe could get out a ‘yes please,’ Shen Yuan’s mouth pressed down on his own. 

It wasn’t a good kiss, not by a long shot, but Luo Binghe and Shen Yuan had had their fair share of kisses before. The quality of this one wasn’t that important. Shen Yuan’s tears were still slipping from his eyes, and dripping onto Luo Binghe’s own face, resting there with a tingling sensation. Luo Binghe gently returned the awkward peck, then pulled back slightly. 

“A-Yuan, your tears can grant wishes, can’t they?” 

“They can? ” 

There was a sudden pop of light, and the weight of Shen Yuan on his lap changed significantly. They both looked down to see a pair of shapely, pale, and very naked legs straddling Luo Binghe’s lap.  

“Legs?!” Shen Yuan scrambled back, kicking his new legs out, tipping backward. He would have fallen back into the pool, had Luo Binghe not grabbed him around the waist. They stared at each other, again speechless.  “I had no idea I could do that!” 

“Very impressive, my love.” Luo Binghe grinned as Shen Yuan sputtered. Luo Binghe pulled back him up, and kissed him on the mouth again. It was a better kiss this time. Luo Binghe loved all of their kisses. He always would. 

“I love you.” Shen Yuan said, his voice music to Luo Binghe’s ears. “Why did I wait so long to get back here?” 

“I’m sure you had a good reason.” Luo Binghe pulled Shen Yuan close, holding him in a hug as he tipped onto his back. 

His heart was stupidly full, beating loudly. Not that he cared to notice. He wasn’t focused on anything other than the feeling of Shen Yuan in his arms. 

“You’re still warm.” His siren mumbled. “I can’t believe I have legs. I don’t even want to use them right now.” 

“You’ll never have to do anything as long as I’m here.” 

Shen Yuan’s smile was the sun coming out from behind a stormcloud. It was the stormcloud, it was the rain, it was the moon, it was everything. 

(Later that evening, when Shen Yuan was trying a shower for the first time, his hair had become saturated with filtered water, and his tail came back with a vengeance, knocking himself and Luo Binghe down to the ground. Neither of them really cared.)