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Chapter Text

Shi Wudu paced up and down the docks, words spilling out of his mouth like a steady stream of water.

„Attend your daily lessons because I will check with your Shifu when I’m back. And make sure to do your physical exercises regularly; your leg will never get better if you keep slacking off like this. Don’t go out with that strange friend of yours, he’s a bad influence. No celebrations inside the palace, there are still stains on the walls from last time. Don’t stay out late, I made sure to instruct all the servants to lock the doors two gongs after sundown. Don’t sneak those sweets of yours into the palace, the–“

Shi Qingxuan dramatically snapped his fan shut and gave his brother an exasperated look.

“Gege! I know! You’ve told me four times and you’ve written it down twice. I will behave, and follow all your instructions, and I won’t break any rules. Don’t you have a conference to get to?”

“If I come back and find the palace in ruins, I will place your under house arrest for the rest of your life.”

“And where will I be kept, when the palace is gone?” Shi Qingxuan smiled sweetly and pushed his brother in the direction of the ship that was supposed to have set sail a while ago. “Stop worrying about me and start worrying about business relations. What will Ling Wen do to you if you’re late?”

That, at last, seemed to pull Shi Wudu away from this lecture only Shi Qingxuan was attending. “Stay out of trouble, Qingxuan. Be studious! Don’t–“

With one last gentle push, Shi Wudu finally set foot onto the Water Tyrant and the captain, who had been following the discussion with growing impatience, let out a relieved sigh. Shi Qingxuan waved his fan as the ship slowly departed from the docks. His brother looked like he was still yelling about something, but the words were carried away on the breeze before they could reach Shi Qingxuan’s ears. When the ship had turned into nothing more than a spec on the horizon, Shi Qingxuan let out a bubbling laugh.

Finally.

He had been looking forward to his brother’s departure to the conference for ages, as that would grant him one entire blissful month where he could do whatever he wanted. Well, not exactly everything he wanted, but at least there would be no one to reprimand his every move. Shi Wudu was stern, diligent, hardworking, and of the opinion that Shi Qingxuan possessed not even an inkling of those valuable traits. But that only served to encourage his attempts to change his younger brother’s entire character, doing his best to turn him into another version of himself. Unfortunately, Shi Qingxuan had no interest in taking over a shipping company. In fact, he had no interest in ships whatsoever. What he did have a passion for, was the finer things in life. Art, music, social gatherings, wine. Not that he would have ever admitted that in front of his brother – he rather liked his freedom, thank you very much.

And now he had one entire month of it, with no one there to check on him. He would have skipped back to the palace, had his leg allowed for it. But as it were, he settled for limping slightly faster than usual, his walking stick drumming a happy rhythm against the paved path.  Shi Qingxuan had broken his leg over a year back and it still hadn’t healed. Apparently, the break was very uneven and would likely never fully recover. Shi Qingxuan didn’t care. He was good at adapting to new circumstances, and what was a little bit of a limp? If anything, it made him even more interesting. He could practically hear the gossip at one of the celebrations he so liked. Why does the pretty young brother of the wealthy Shi Wudu walk with a limp? Has he perhaps gotten into a fight? Shi Qingxuan smiled to himself, lost in thoughts while he made his way back to the palace. The smile lasted until he spied a figure standing on top of the stairs leading to the entrance.

“Young Master, there you are. Your lessons were supposed to start a few moments ago, your brother–“

“– has given very clear instructions on that,” Shi Qingxuan ended his Shifu’s sentence with a sigh. “Of course he has.”

“No need to look so crestfallen, he only wants what is best for you. Now, if you would follow me, we have five years of history to catch up on.”

Shi Qingxuan took his time with hopping up the stairs. At least his bad leg gave him an excuse to reduce the amount of time he had to listen to his Shifu babbling about nautical history.

-

Shi Qingxuan was on the run. Well, not literally of course, running wasn’t something he did anymore, so he was perhaps more on a hobble. But if he had to listen to one more word about profit calculations, his head was going to explode. And so, he had feigned an urgent need to relieve himself, and made his escape. He had about two, maybe three sticks of incense time before his Shifu would get suspicious, and so he limped through the hallways as fast as he could. Shi Qingxuan had never had any reason (or chance) to hide, so he had no idea where the most inconspicuous spots were in the palace. He briefly considered his own rooms, but that would be too obvious, right? Maybe the vast gardens? But there was too much open space, and he wasn’t exactly the fastest cripple around. Somewhere in the distance he heard yelling which sounded a lot like “Have you seen the young master?”

Shi Qingxuan’s heart sank – if he got caught now, not only would his lesson on finances continue, it would also be preceded by an extensive lecture on proper behaviour. And so he let instincts take over from reason, bolting through the door right next to him without paying attention to which room he was stumbling into. Breathing heavily, he leaned his back against the wooden door, straining his ears for any steps or agitated shouts from outside. But it remained quiet, and after a few moments Shi Qingxuan allowed himself to take a deep breath and relax his rigid body. He risked a quick look around and regretted it almost immediately as all his tension returned with a vengeance. He had never been to this room before, but he knew immediately what it was.

His brother’s personal office.

Shi Qingxuan snapped his fan open like an automatic defence mechanism. He wagged it viciously as if the breeze of air could somehow cool down his burning nerves. It seemed to work, and the first shock slowly drifted away on the current of air Shi Qingxuan was creating. The anxiety gradually left his system and excitement replaced the space it left behind. Usually, no one was allowed in his brother’s office, and the strict policy was enforced with a very sturdy lock. Why it was absent now of all times, Shi Qingxuan did not know, but he welcomed the unforeseen opportunity. As someone whose curiosity and tendency to gossip was known far and wide, things like perpetually locked doors were a subject of immense interest – even if those belonged to his very stern and strict brother.

Shi Qingxuan began to gingerly stroll around the vast room, stopping here and there to examine some maps or an intricate looking seafaring instrument. Much of the space was occupied by a huge desk that was covered over and over in paperwork and which Shi Qingxuan decidedly ignored, just as the bookshelves that covered the walls.

Instead, his eyes were drawn to a very large object in one of the corners. At first, he had thought it to be just another shelf, but closer observation revealed it to be something covered by a heavy piece of cloth. It took up even more space than the desk, and Shi Qingxuan approached almost automatically, always drawn to these kinds of mystery. He pressed his hand against the cloth – whatever was underneath was sturdy and unyielding.  Slapping his closed fan against it produced a dull sound, muffled by the fabric. And so, Shi Qingxuan tugged. And then a bit harder, and harder still, until the heavy curtains finally relented and slid to the floor like flowing water. 

Shi Qingxuan stared. Then he clasped his hands over his mouth to stifle his scream.

There, right in the esteemed Shi Wudu’s personal office, in the palace of the biggest shipping company of the realm, stood a giant glass basin with a corpse in it. The basin itself was nothing special; it was about Shi Qingxuan’s height and filled with crystal clear water that sloshed calmly against the glass walls. It would have passed as a slightly eccentric decorative element, were it not for the lifeless body that lay on its bottom.

Shi Qingxuan stumbled backwards; his walking stick clattered onto the floor and Shi Qingxuan followed. It was then that he noticed something even stranger (if that was at all possible – it wasn’t exactly normal to discover you brother had been keeping a preserved corpse in his room). The body’s legs seemed to be wrapped up in something, glimmering like black silk. Despite his better judgement, Shi Qingxuan crawled towards the basin again. From up close, he saw that it wasn’t silk at all – it looked rather hard, with an even texture to it. His brain needed a while to process what his eyes took in – then, Shi Qingxuan realised it were actually scales of a deep, saturated black, here and there interrupted by flecks of gleaming gold. Further down they seamlessly transitioned into something that looked alarmingly like a fin floating in the water, delicate and translucent. Shi Qingxuan swallowed. He had heard the legends and myths, of course he had, of a merfolk that inhabited the deepest depths of the ocean. But he had taken them for stories to tell young children, not for something he’d find proof of in his brother’s office.

Gathering up all his courage, Shi Qingxuan let his eyes travel further up, until scales turned into skin, pale and smooth, with an almost sickly-looking grey hue. The body was lean and sculpted, and every now and then a white scar disrupted the otherwise unblemished skin. When Shi Qingxuan’s eyes reached this creature’s face, his breath hitched in his throat. It was a harsh face, all angles and sharp edges, and even with the eyes closed (in sleep or death?) the brows were furrowed. But there was a beauty to it Shi Qingxuan had never seen before, mesmerising and unique. The face was framed by thick black hair that flowed through the water like liquid stands of ink. Almost involuntarily Shi Qingxuan got closer until his advanced was stopped by the layer of glass between him and the creature (Mermaid, a voice in Shi Qingxuan’s head provided, and he quickly shut it up).

He didn’t know for how long he had been staring, but all of a sudden and without any warning, the two eyes snapped open and instantly focused on Shi Qingxuan. For a moment, their gazes were locked on to each other, pale blue meeting deep gold; then Shi Qingxuan yelped and scrambled backwards, away from the piercing stare.

“I – I – I,” he stammered like the fool he obviously was.

The creature in the basin trashed with its tail, sending water sloshing over the edge of the glass and onto the expensive carpet. It pressed itself against the walls of the translucent prison and stared at Shi Qingxuan with wide eyes. Large hands splayed against the glass, fine webbing woven between the fingers, and Shi Qingxuan wondered dumbly how it might feel to the touch.

And then the creature’s mouth opened, revealing a row of unusually sharp teeth, and Shi Qingxuan was certain a loud screech would escape. But to his greatest surprise, the creature spoke in a deep and melodic voice that sent small ripples through the water.

“Who are you?” it asked in a detached tone, as if it wasn’t really interested in the answer.

Shi Qingxuan opened and closed his mouth several times, like he was the fish, before he finally managed to form words.

“Sh– Shi Qingxuan,” he stammered and reached for his fan to cool his heated disposition.

The creature snarled and its hands curled into firsts.

“So you’re with him,” it spat, and its fin jerked again to drench the carpet even further.

“H-him? Shi Wudu? My brother you mean?”  

“I don’t care what he is to you,” the creature said and finally detached itself from the glass to float freely in the basin, “Why are you here? Did you come to gloat? Did he finally allow others to stare at his prized possession?”

“I… No, he – he isn’t even here. I didn’t…I didn’t know there was something like you here,” Shi Qingxuan said helplessly, trying and failing to stand up.

It let out a laugh – a dark and humourless thing. “Something like me. Of course.”

Shi Qingxuan’s eyes widened in horror – how could he have been so tactless?

“Oh no, oh no, I’m so sorry, that sounded terrible, I didn’t mean it like that, not at all, I didn’t want to insult you! You’re not a thing, no, you’re a person and beautiful and…” his voice stumbled over the word and he felt colour creep into his face, “…what’s your name?” he ended weakly.

The man looked at him, the anger in his eyes almost completely replaced by confusion as he hovered motionlessly in the water.

“He Xuan,” he answered after a long while, his voice slightly strained, as if it wasn’t used to saying the name.

“Nice to meet you, He Xuan. I’m Shi Qingxuan. Ah, you knew that already. Our names sound similar, right? Hahaha…” Shi Qingxuan was babbling, as he always did when his nerves acted up. He Xuan’s rigid posture had softened ever so slightly and his brows were now furrowed in impatience rather than anger. Shi Qingxuan used the opportunity to struggle to his feet, willing his legs to carry his weight. He Xuan observed his motions with wary eyes (wary, golden eyes, more beautiful than any of Shi Qingxuan’s jewellery).

“What is that?” He Xuan asked when Shi Qingxuan picked up his cane.

“This?” he whirled it around a bit and smiled, “It helps me to walk. My leg doesn’t work like it used to.”

He Xuan scoffed and twisted his tail almost demonstratively. “Useless.”

Shi Qingxuan laughed and allowed himself a few steps in the direction of the basin. “Quite so. My brother thinks the same.”

He Xuan’s eyes darkened instantly, and a conflicted expression appeared on his face. “He hasn’t healed you,” he said, more to himself than to Shi Qingxuan.

“Of course not. He can’t do that. But I’m trying my best to recover! I work hard every day. Well, not today, not yet, but I will, and then –“

“You said your brother is gone. Where is he?”

“Huh? He’s at some gathering with other businesspeople. He didn’t really tell me what it’s about. He’ll be back in a month though, if you miss him.”

He Xuan stared at him with such disgust in his eyes that Shi Qingxuan flinched involuntarily.

“Miss him? Are you stupid?”

“Wh- why? Are you not friends? Then why are you here?”

He Xuan drifted closer to the glass, and for a moment Shi Qingxuan almost expected him to pull himself up and out of the basin. But instead, He Xuan slammed his fist against the wall, mouth distorted in a snarl that exposed those sharp teeth.

“I’m not here because I want to be, you naive little idiot. I’m here because your brother enslaved me, he took my everything and then myself, and now he refuses me even death.” The last word was accompanied by another wave of water that swept out of the basin. Shi Qingxuan stared at him in horror.

“No, Ge…my brother wouldn’t do that, he never…he would never hurt someone like that, he’s maybe a bit strict, but he’s a good person, he–“

“He’s a cruel bastard who would do everything for his own gain,” He Xuan spat. “That he hasn’t healed your leg is the best proof of that. Tell me, do you know what merfolk are known for?”

Shi Qingxuan stumbled back, his vision swimming with tears that threatened to join puddles of water on the floor.

“I don’t know what you mean, my brother wouldn’t…”

He Xuan kept talking, a cruel smile stretching his lips, “We are known for granting wishes. Three of them, should someone manage to catch us. And do you know how many your dear brother–“

Shouts echoed through the corridor outside and they snapped Shi Qingxuan out of his stupor. “Stop lying! Stop! I won’t listen to it anymore!”

He would have covered his ears, were his hands not busy clutching his walking stick, and so he made for the door, not caring if his Shifu was right there on the other side. But the corridor was empty and Shi Qingxuan limped through it as quickly as he could, trying to get the echoes of He Xuan’s voice out of his ears.

-     -     -

He Xuan watched the man stumble out of the room, clumsy on his unworking leg. With his absence the silence returned, and He Xuan found it even more deafening than usual. He remained hovering in the water, his fist still pressed against the glass and his temper only slowly cooling down. He Xuan hadn’t encountered many humans during his stay in this hell, but this one had to be the strangest one yet. He seemed somehow brighter, as if the darkness of the world around him had not yet managed to touch him. But in his brightness lay an ignorance that sent an unfamiliar kind of anger through He Xuan. He slowly let himself sink to the bottom of his translucent prison, staring up at the missing sky. He wouldn’t see this Shi Qingxuan again, that much he was sure of. He Xuan was too good at scaring people away. Eventually, he drifted into an uneasy sleep again and he dreamt of the black waters of the deep ocean, where no light reached and where the silence was almost deafening.  

When He Xuan opened his eyes, bright sunlight broke through the water’s surface, and for a moment he thought he was laying in the shallow waves on the beach. Then he realised that there was still no sky above him, and he scoffed at his own stupidity. Two years, and his treacherous heart still harboured hope. He lifted himself off the ground with a swift motion of his tail, careful to not spill any more water. He stretched his arms to get rid of some of the stiffness, but the basin didn’t quite give him enough space.

“Uhm…”

He Xuan’s head snapped around. There, right in front of him, was another face. He would have flinched, were his self-control not so impeccable.

“You!” he hissed instead, staring into Shi Qingxuan’s pale eyes. They didn’t look like his brother’s at all; instead the icy cruelty He Xuan had grown to hate was replaced by an uncertain warmth. Not that it mattered. They were of the same blood, they grew up in the same environment, so any difference He Xuan might imagine was nothing but an illusion. “Why are you back?”

The insecurity on Shi Qingxuan’s face grew with the red colour that now dusted his cheeks. He Xuan saw him swallow heavily before he dropped his head, and if He Xuan didn’t know better, he’d say the other looked almost bashful.

“I…” it was barely more than a whisper, a small sound in the emptiness of the room that did little to disrupt the silence. Where Shi Wudu’s voice carried with it a command under every word, Shi Qingxuan’s was more gentle, more subdued, as if it was used to being talked over. He Xuan glared at him – the act he was putting up did little to lessen He Xuan’s dislike of the man.

“Speak up or leave. I’d rather listen to the silence than to some mumbled lies.”

Shi Qingxuan looked up again, and there was a sudden flash of determination in his eyes. “I wanted to apologise.” One of his hands went up and his fingers tangled into the light brown curls of his long hair, an idle motion that proved his nervousness. Still he continued with a firm voice. “I acted immaturely yesterday, and I didn’t even listen to everything you had to say. So. I’m sorry.”

He Xuan stared at him, not sure what to say. An apology? Directed at him? That was about as strange as it could get and He Xuan felt his brow furrowing in irritation. Shi Qingxuan seemed to take his silence as an invitation to keep talking.

“I would like…no, I would be interested in listening to your story. If you were inclined tell me. I can’t simply… accept that my brother is guilty of the things you accuse him of, but I also don’t understand why you would make something like that up. And I want to understand. I do.” His voice lost its confidence the further he went on, and by the end it was quiet again.

“Why would you care?” He Xuan growled because how naïve could someone be? “Why would you even consider what I have to say? You’re that bastard’s brother, I have no reason to explain myself to you.”

Shi Qingxuan flinched, but he didn’t back away. “I care because you’re in our palace, clearly unhappy and not out of your own will. I will consider what you have to say because you’re a person like everyone else, with feelings and thoughts and opinions. You should explain yourself to me because that way I can…well, maybe I can help you?”

He Xuan’s hands, curled to fists at his sides, relaxed. He felt his tense shoulders drop ever so slightly. Even the frown he kept on his face as a defence didn’t feel as deep anymore. This was, without a doubt, the strangest man He Xuan had ever met, with courage born out of stupidity, and kindness carried by naivety.

“There is no point. You won’t believe me.”

The corners of Shi Qingxuan’s mouth curved up in a stupidly bright smile that put the sunlight to shame. “You don’t look like a liar.”

He Xuan stared at him. Rolled his eyes. Stared a bit more. How an idiot like this could have survived for so long in this cruel world was beyond him.

“So? Would you tell me your story? I promise I’ll listen.”

He Xuan glared at him for just a while longer (maybe that would make him go away. It didn’t). Then, “Whatever,” he said. “It’s not like I have anything better to do.” And it was not like anyone had listened to him for the past two years.

-2 years ago-

He Xuan frantically looked around, desperate to find any sign of life amidst the rubble that had become of his home. How often had he been told that the reef he had chosen was too close to the surface, that it would sooner or later be discovered by humans who would not think twice to destroy it? How often had he ignored the warnings in favour of his sister’s demand for ‘more sunlight’? And now it had happened, humans had come to take away his everything and more. Red fog clouded the water and the metallic taste of blood was heavy against He Xuan’s gills. He was so wrapped up in his desperate search for his family that he saw the net too late. His fin tangled in its tight loops and he jerked involuntarily, trying to slip out of the trap, but his thrashing only made it worse. Someone pulled at the net, He Xuan felt the jerk though his whole body, and he could to nothing to fight the force that dragged him towards the surface of the water. His tail broke through first and icy winds tore at his scales, sending shivers through He Xuan. He readied himself for the inevitable, but it still came as a shock. His body was pulled out of the water and for a few terrible moments, He Xuan’s entire world became a blurry hell. He didn’t know where was up and where was down, and the too-cold air scraped at his sensitive skin. The net dug deep into him and he felt some scales bend under the pressure. He would have screamed, but no sound escaped his mouth.

“This one is still alive!”

“Get it onto the deck!”

He Xuan closed his eyes and wished desperately for death. But the humans weren’t so merciful. Instead, he was hurled onto something hard and rough, splinters of wood tearing at his exposed skin. He opened his eyes to find himself surrounded by several looming shadows looking down at him. With a last surge of strength he thrashed his tail, slamming one of the shadows against the railing.

“Restrain it!” another shadow yelled, and an added net was thrown over He Xuan. He felt his consciousness fading and hoped that the lack of water would kill him quickly.

It didn’t.

He Xuan awoke, not knowing where he was or how much time had passed. He was submerged in water and alive, those were the only things he could be sure of. He slowly opened his eyes, and with the sight his senses came rushing back all at once. The first thing he felt was pain, ever-present and all encompassing, drowning him in the white-hot sensation. His skin felt raw and parts of his tail stung in a way that told him some of his scales were missing. Wherever he was now, it was too bright, the harsh light almost blinding, and He Xuan couldn’t make out his surroundings.

“I think it woke up,” a low voice came from somewhere next to him, and he involuntarily turned his head in the direction. “Should we take precautions?”

“No. Let it wake. We need it able to speak,” another voice answered and He Xuan desperately blinked against the brightness, the uncertainty almost driving him mad.

Slowly, the world came into focus. Shapes appeared around him and through the light, moving shadows stood out. There were two humans right next to him; their forms distorted in a strange, unreal way. He tried to move away, but his back was met with sturdy resistance that thwarted his attempted retreat. Someone laughed, and He Xuan felt fury mix in with the dread. He bared his teeth in a snarl and let out a low growl, but that only encouraged the humans observing him.

“It’s harmless now,” the man standing closest to He Xuan said and knocked against an invisible wall that apparently enclosed the water He Xuan was in. “Aren’t you?”

He Xuan didn’t answer. There was nothing for him to deny, and his pride wouldn’t let him agree with his captors.

“So…” the man said and came closer. He was tall and lean, with his light brown hair tied up and lavishly ornated blue cloth covering his body. “You’re one of the famed merfolk, aren’t you? Everyone considers you extinct.” He waited a moment, apparently giving He Xuan the chance to speak. He didn’t take it, and so the man continued. “Legend has it that you grant whoever manages to capture you three wishes.”

He Xuan glared at him. Of course. This was the only reason their kind was almost extinct. Hunted down by humans in pursuit of those three wishes, more often than not killed rather than captured. And as much as He Xuan would love to tell his jailors that they would get nothing from him, it would only be a short-lived lie. The truth was that he had to grant their wishes. Merfolk had refused humans in the past, and it did something to them, as if they withered from the inside out. And so, He Xuan faced his captor with a grim resolve, determined to let no weakness show in front of him. He would make it though this, and eventually, one way or another, he would get his revenge.

Present Day

As he ended his story, old wounds ripped open and old anger reignited, and He Xuan’s breath was slightly elaborated. For a moment he saw Shi Wudu instead of his younger brother. The rage inside of him was so all-encompassing that He Xuan was tempted to vault over the lip of his prison to kill the bastard that stole his life from him. Then, Shi Qingxuan opened his mouth and He Xuan snapped out of his grim considerations.

“No, no that can’t…but what would Gege want from you? He doesn’t…he didn’t need anything, he’s smart and successful and…maybe you’re mistaken! Maybe one of the others–“

He Xuan laughed, a strangled sound that felt raw in his throat and sent bubbles of water to the surface. “I knew it. You’re just as much of a fool as I thought. Look around. Are we not in your brother’s study? Is this not his palace? If you’re still refusing to admit the obvious, then get out of my sight. “

“But he doesn’t need…“

“First,” He Xuan interrupted loudly and held up a finger, and Shi Qingxuan flinched before following the motion with his eyes. “He wanted me to strengthen his foothold in the business. Say, did you not notice that your brother has been strangely lucky in the past two years? Everything he attempts, he accomplishes.”

“Yes, but–“

“Second,” He Xuan held up a second finger, “He wanted to work without having to worry about competition.” Shi Qingxuan grew oddly stiff at that, his hand tightening around that stupid fan he clutched.

“You noticed,” He Xuan stated plainly, “That everyone who might have been an obstacle in his path vanished or was met with an ill fate.”

Shi Qingxuan didn’t say anything, he just stared down at his hands with a look of desperation on his face. Then, “What was his third wish,” he asked quietly, still without looking at He Xuan.

He Xuan smiled cruelly. “He has not yet uttered it.”

“Two years…” Shi Qingxuan muttered and took a step back from the basin.

“Just so you know. Healing a broken bone is nothing more than a trifle.”

Shi Qingxuan’s head snapped up and he looked at He Xuan, his pale eyes wide and glistening. A strange emotion surged through He Xuan’s chest, one he faintly recognised from days long gone.

“I need to go,” Shi Qingxuan blurted out and turned on his heel, limping out of the room and quietly closed the door.

He Xuan should have felt more satisfied at watching despair and anguish weighing down the other’s shoulders like a heavy burden. He should be pleased by inflicting pain on the brother of the one who had been tormenting him for two years. Instead, he just felt cold as the silence settled over him like a thick blanket of snow.

Chapter Text

Shi Qingxuan sat in his room and stared blankly ahead. He felt numb, as if every emotion had been drained out of him and remained in his brother’s office. He Xuan’s words still echoed in his ears and he tried to reconcile the picture they painted of his brother with the one he himself had developed over the years. Sure, his brother was ambitious and determined, but he wasn’t cruel. And he would never…

Shi Qingxuan buried his head in his hands. He wished he had never entered his brother’s office, had never found out which depths lay hidden behind it. A second later he was disgusted with himself. Did he really prefer his naïve ignorance to the truth, a truth that was the agony of another creature?

No, not another creature. Another person.

Shi Qingxuan knew the feeling of being held captive, of being kept in a place without any sense of belonging, but compared to He Xuan, his fate was a generous one. He was free to walk around, to do what he pleased as long as it was within the boundaries of the rules. Shi Qingxuan slowly got to his feet. He wanted to do something, to help, but like so often in his life, he felt utterly powerless. And then there was the doubt that still festered in his mind. How could he be sure that He Xuan really told the truth? What if he was a malevolent spirit, kept by his brother to ensure he didn’t harm anyone? Shi Qingxuan groaned at himself. This wasn’t getting him anywhere. Indecisiveness had been his weakness all his life. Luckily, there was always one person he could go to for help.

-

“Shi Qingxuan! What are you doing here?” Xie Lian looked up from his cutting board, face lighting up with a smile. “I didn’t expect to see you again so soon!”

“Aw, Gege, I thought you said we would have the day to ourselves,” Hua Cheng pouted and draped himself over Xie Lian’s back, shooting Shi Qingxuan an indignant look, as if he had interrupted something incredibly important.

“I’m sorry, Your Highness, I didn’t mean to disturb you,” Shi Qingxuan said apologetically, resolutely avoiding eye-contact with Hua Cheng. He knew how peculiar the young man could be when it came to Xie Lian, and Shi Qingxuan had enough worries already, he didn’t need to incur the wrath of Xie Lian’s strange…whatever they were to each other. Shi Qingxuan leaned towards boyfriends, but his friend had always been of the unaware kind, so there was nothing set in stone. Hua Cheng, however, seemed quite certain of his relationship with Xie Lian, as he buried his nose in the crook of the other’s neck.

“Young master Qingxuan seems to have some urgent business with you, Gege,” he murmured and traced his hands up and down Xie Lian’s arms. “I will give you some privacy to talk.”

“Ahaha, thank you, San Lang,” Xie Lian smiled, obviously oblivious to the indecency of their position. “We will eat later then.”

“Mmh, I can’t wait,” Hua Cheng hummed and went back into their small hut, not before ruffling Xie Lian’s hair.

“I’m very sorry, Your Highness, if it’s a bother, I can leave.”

“No, no, no,” Xie Lian said hastily and smiled, “Don’t mind San Lang, you know how he is!”

Oh, how Shi Qingxuan knew. He wasn’t even sure when and how it all started. One day, Hua Cheng was simply…there, standing at Xie Lian’s side like that was where he’d always belonged (“This is San Lang,” Xie Lian had said with adoration in his voice. “You can call me Hua Cheng,” Hua Cheng had added with sweet venom in his voice). Xie Lian used to be nobility, before his family had fallen from grace. To Shi Qingxuan, however, he would always be ‘His Highness’, much to the dismay of his brother.

“So!” Xie Lian said and clapped his hands, “What brings you here? I thought your brother didn’t like you going into town to often.”

“Hahaha, don’t say it like that, Your Highness, he just means well,” Shi Qingxuan scratched at his neck. “But…well, he’s off to a conference and won’t return for another month.”

“Ooh,” Xie Lian said knowingly, “Are you being rebellious, Shi Qingxuan?”

There came a lout snort from inside the hut, as if Shi Qingxuan’s attempt at disobedience was something to be laughed at. Shi Qingxuan sniffed.

“Well, I…I just wanted to ask His Highness something. Say, weren’t you always interested in mythical creatures?”

For some reason, Xie Lian briefly turned his head to look in the direction of the hut Hua Cheng had vanished into. Then the moment passed, and he smiled again.

“Yes, that’s right. Why, do you want to hear a story?”

“More or less, ahahah. Have you…have you ever read something about merfolk?”

“They’re useless trash,” came a voice from behind Xie Lian as Hua Cheng poked his head out of the door. So much for privacy. “Secretive, self-isolating fools who think themselves better than others.”

“Ah, don’t be mean, San Lang!” Xie Lian exclaimed, “That’s not true! They are an ancient folk, much sought-after and powerful!”

“What do you mean, sought-after?” Shi Qingxuan asked, half curious and half scared.

“Well, they have the ability to fulfil wishes! Whoever manages to catch one will be granted three wishes. Unfortunately, that has proven to be more of a calamity than a blessing. They are said to be almost extinct, no, San Lang?”

“Gege is very knowledgeable about this, I have nothing to add,” Hua Cheng said adoringly.

“Ah,” said Shi Qingxuan, who just had his fears confirmed. He stared at the ocean beyond the hut, calmly glinting in the sun. Xie Lian seemed to notice that something was off, but he was way too polite to pry, and so he just laughed awkwardly. Hua Cheng, however, had no such reservations.

“Why is the young master Qingxuan so interested in those see-dwelling cretins?” he asked with a mischievous grin. Xie Lian peaked up and threw Shi Qingxuan a curious glance.

“Hahahaha,” Shi Qingxuan’s laughter sounded forced even to his own ears. His was such an oddly specific inquiry that a ‘Well, I just found it interesting’ wouldn’t really justify it. Plus, Xie Lian was his friend, and Shi Qingxuan trusted him with his life. Hua Cheng, on the other hand…but since the two only came in a bundle these days, Shi Qingxuan didn’t have much of a choice. “Well, you see – I recently…hm, how do I say this…”

“You recently met one of those merfolk and now you want to know whether you can trust them?” Hua Cheng provided, uncharacteristically helpful. Shi Qingxuan gaped at him. “How did you know?” he said, at the same time as Xie Lian. Hua Cheng grinned and sauntered over to wrap his arms around Xie Lian’s waist, apparently not able to be without physical contact for even one stick of incense time.

“Why else would the young master suddenly ask about such a strange thing? Not that I blame Gege for not noticing, the young master has certainly beaten around the bush.”

“Hah…Hua Cheng is right,” Shi Qingxuan said, feeling colour creep into his cheeks. “There is a merperson in my brother’s office.”

At that, even Hua Cheng looked mildly surprised. Meanwhile, Xie Lian’s mouth fell open.

“Your brother captured a merperson and keeps them in his office?”

“That seems to be it, yes, hahah. Very strange, isn’t it?” Shi Qingxuan rubbed at his neck and stared to his feet. Saying it out loud, and to other people at that, felt even stranger than just thinking about it. When he looked up again, Shi Qingxuan found Xie Lian staring at Hua Cheng with wide eyes, but Hua Cheng shook his head almost unnoticeably. The expression on Xie Lian’s face became pained and he gave Hua Cheng a pleading look. A strange feeling crept up to Shi Qingxuan, as if he had witnessed something that was not for his eyes.

“Hahaha, anyway, Your Highness, I just wanted to make sure that there was no danger coming from that person. But, if you both say they are not malevolent, then I will take your word for it.”

“Ah, Shi Qingxuan,” Xie Lian began, but was stopped by Hua Cheng’s hands on his hips, pulling him against the taller man’s chest.

“Gege, we should make food, I’m getting hungry.”

“But–“

“Don’t worry, Your Highness, I will ask my brother about it when he is back. No need to keep thinking about it, I’m sure there is a good reason for it all,” Shi Qingxuan said hastily and forced a smile on his face.

“Alright, but only if you’re sure! Please come by whenever you feel like it, this place is always open for you!” Xie Lian gestured towards his decrepit hut while Hua Cheng’s face said very clearly that Shi Qingxuan better not take those words to heart.

And so, Shi Qingxuan said his Goodbyes and made his long way back to the palace. It took him a while and by the time he arrived, the sun had almost drowned in the ocean, colouring the world in a warm orange. Shi Qingxuan’s leg protested at every step as he arduously climbed up the stairs. When he reached the landing, he was met with two stern eyes that gazed at him reproachfully.

“Young master! Where have you been? First your inexcusable behaviour yesterday, and now you simply vanish for the entire afternoon! If this continues, I will have no other choice but to report this to your brother,” his Shifu scolded, head reddening more with each word.

Shi Qingxuan gave him his most apologetical face, making sure to look extra rueful. “I deeply apologise for my insolence, Shifu. I simply felt the need to stretch my leg today, it felt so stiff and uncomfortable.”

“Well, that is what your exercises are for!” Shifu said, but his tone had softened significantly. He had always felt bad for Shi Qingxuan’s condition, and if Shi Qingxuan used that to his advantage every now and then, well…

“I left some books in your room for you to read until tomorrow! Make sure to study them properly.”

“I will, I will, thank you, Shifu!” Shi Qingxuan said and bowed as deeply as his leg allowed him to.

“Now come inside, dinner is already prepared.”

Dinner was a lonely affair. It was rare for his brother to join him, so Shi Qingxuan was used to the silence, only disturbed by the occasional clatter of chopsticks. He stared at the abundance of food on the table and a sudden thought entered his mind. Did merfolk need to eat? And if so, who was getting He Xuan food while his brother was gone? Did everyone in the mansion know about the unusual prisoner, while only Shi Qingxuan was being kept ignorant? Somehow that thought sent a wave of anger through him and instead of finishing his meal, he stuffed it hastily into his pouch. Some of the oil seeped through the cloth and stained his robes, but he didn’t care. Determinedly, he stood and made his way back to his room. But instead of turning right at the end of the corridor, he looked around, and when he was sure no one was there to see him, he quickly entered his brother’s office.

It still looked like Shi Qingxuan had left it, with the heavy cloth that had once obscured the basin still laying on the floor. He Xuan seemed asleep again, sunken onto the bottom of his prison. Shi Qingxuan approached carefully, but the constant tock-tock of his cane made it hard to sneak up on anyone. As he drew closer, He Xuan stirred, his fin twitching and sending small ripples through the water. Shi Qingxuan instinctively halted his steps, looking warily at the waking man.

He Xuan’s eyes opened and immediately focussed on Shi Qingxuan. For a brief moment they widened in surprise. Then He Xuan’s guard was up again and he frowned.

“You?”

“Me! Hahah…”

He Xuan’s frown deepened, and his tail jerked.

“Did you come to gloat some more?”

“No! No, no, I brought you something, here,” Shi Qingxuan fumbled with his sleeve and pulled the pouch out of it, dripping oil all over the floor.

“A wet cloth?” He Xuan pulled up an eyebrow.

“Yes! I mean, no! It’s not…ah, I thought you might be hungry, so I brought some dinner,” Shi Qingxuan mumbled and pulled a piece of glistening fish out of the pouch, “I might be a bit squished, but–“

He didn’t get further because as soon as he saw the food, He Xuan lunged forward, pressing his webbed fingers against the glass. His golden eyes were wide and focussed solely on the piece of food in Shi Qingxuan’s hand, as if it was a particularly shining gem.

“Oh,” said Shi Qingxuan and stared at He Xuan, who had apparently forgotten about his animosity temporarily. And so, Shi Qingxuan hobbled over. The closer he got, the more of his senses He Xuan seemed to regain, until the excitement on his face had almost completely made way to suspicion.

“What do you want for it?” he growled and crossed his arms.

“What do I want?” Shi Qingxuan echoed and stared at him.

“Yes,” He Xuan said impatiently.

“I – nothing? Why would I want anything for it?”

He Xuan gave him a disbelieving look. “You mean to tell me that you want to give me food out of the goodness of your heart?”

“I mean…yes? I thought you might want something. When was the last time you ate?”

“2 years ago.”

“WHAT?”

He Xuan sighed, his posture deflating slightly.

“We don’t need food. That doesn’t mean we don’t like it.” He looked almost defiant, as if he expected Shi Qingxuan to judge him for wanting to eat something. Shi Qingxuan made sure that his smile was as honest as possible

“Well, then it’s all good, isn’t it?” He stepped up right to the basin and held out the pouch. “I, uhm… I don’t have a bowl or anything,” he muttered, suddenly feeling incredibly stupid for offering up food in this way. “Can you…come out of the water?”

He Xuan sighed. “Not for long, but long enough to eat that bit of food.” He carefully reached for the lip of the basin and pulled himself up. Shi Qingxuan couldn’t help but stare at the lean muscles that flexed under He Xuan’s pale skin. He swallowed.

“Well?” He Xuan said impatiently, his voice sounding rough under the influence of air. His hair, usually floating weightlessly though the water, hung heavily around his face, and Shi Qingxuan got the strange urge to touch it. Instead, he hastily reached up to hand He Xuan his pouch. Their fingers brushed and Shi Qingxuan almost flinched. He had expected the other’s skin to be cold, but He Xuan’s hand was almost freezing. If he noticed anything, He Xuan didn’t give an indication. As soon as he held the pouch, he dug though it and shoved a handful of food into his mouth. Shi Qingxuan stared at him, eyes wide and mouth agape. There was something oddly endearing about watching this stoic and dignified man stuffing his face with loose rice. He Xuan didn’t seem to care much about his appearance though and didn’t look up until the pouch was completely empty. Then he let out a content little sigh and was about to slide back into the water. Shi Qingxuan quickly reached up to grasp his wrist, “Wait a moment, He-xiong, you have some rice on your cheek!” he exclaimed and dug out a small handkerchief.

He Xuan stared at him. “What did you call me?” he snapped, and his voice now sounded so raw that it almost hurt in Shi Qingxuan’s throat.

“Ah, I’m sorry!” Shi Qingxuan felt his face heating up, “I didn’t mean to do that, it was…a reflex?”

“A reflex?”

“I won’t do it anymore, I promise!”

He Xuan fell quiet and took the handkerchief from Shi Qingxuan’s outstretched hand. He wiped at his mouth and threw the cloth back at Shi Qingxuan before lowering himself back into the basin.

“Whatever,” he said, clipped and sudden, more a permission than an expression of indifference, “call me whatever you want, it’s not like I care.”

Shi Qingxuan tried and failed not to beam at him.

“Alright then, He-xiong! I hope you enjoyed the food!”

“It was fine, I guess. The white stuff tasted weird.”

“The rice, you mean? It’s a specialty, our cook is very good at making it extra fluffy. You should consider yourself lucky that I’m not feeding you His Highnesses food. His meatballs are legendary. You’ve probably never had some before, right? I can’t imagine them to be a staple in the ocean, haha. Did you ever eat meat, or just fish? You – oh gods, you don’t eat people, do you?”

He Xuan’s eyebrows met his hairline. “Don’t humans need to breathe, or are you an exception?”

Shi Qingxuan shrugged awkwardly, “Gege always says I talk too much, but I don’t think there is something as ‘too much talking’, not when the alternative is endless, boring silence.”

He did fall quiet after that, not wanting to irritate He Xuan with his blabbering. He Xuan sighed.

“We don’t eat people. Why would you think that?”

“I don’t know, just…those stories, you know?”

“I don’t. Are they worse than having your family killed by humans and being abducted for two years?” He Xuan asked cynically, and Shi Qingxuan flinched.

“I’m sorry, I…oh. Oh no,” he strained his ears, ever wary of the strict voice of his Shifu. “Oh no, I’m being checked up on.”

“You’re being what?” He Xuan asked irritated.

“I need to go! Don’t worry, I’ll be back tomorrow. I think. I hope!” Shi Qingxuan felt a strange pang of guilt when he saw He Xuan’s deep frown. He didn’t want to leave, he wanted to keep talking, desperate to know more about He Xuan. But if anyone found out he’d been in his brother’s office, then he would be in real trouble.

“Whatever,” He Xuan said again, “It’s not like I’m going anywhere.” He sounded causally, but his bitter expression betrayed his tone. Shi Qingxuan’s heart stung at that, as if the icy-cold water of He Xuan’s basin enclosed it.

-     -     -

He Xuan couldn’t sleep. That was a real problem, since sleeping was all there was to do in the small confines of his prison. It was all the fault of that irritating human, barging into his life with an aura so bright it made He Xuan’s eyes sting and a voice so loud it made his ears tingle. Shi Qingxuan was a contradiction to everything He Xuan had become used to in the past two years, and he wasn’t quite sure how to handle it. Contempt and anger were usually his go-to emotions when it came to interactions with humans, but they didn’t quite fit whatever it was he felt towards Shi Qingxuan. Gratefulness was the first thing that came to mind, especially after the food the young man had given him yesterday. He Xuan had always enjoyed eating, had always liked feeling the taste and texture of different delicacies against his tongue. His sister used to mock him for it, after all Merfolk don’t need to eat, why do you bother? But to He Xuan it wasn’t a bother as much as it was an indulgence. And he hadn’t been able to indulge in over two years, so when Shi Qingxuan had handed him that small bag filled with strangely sticky white grains and strongly flavoured fish, he had nearly forgotten the resentment he was supposed to feel at the mere sight of humans. No, resentment was definitely not was He Xuan experienced whenever Shi Qingxuan barged into his prison cell.

“He-xiong!”

That was another thing. He-xiong? What was he supposed to make of that, a term used for accomplices, for friends, not for captives in the office of your brother.

“I brought you food! Have you ever had mantou? Here, try, try, it’s the just the greatest thing!”

Were it not for his unworking leg, He Xuan was sure that the young man would have jumped up and down in excitement. He extended a hand with two soft-looking pillows in them. He Xuan broke through the calm surface of the water and almost flinched when his skin was exposed to the harsh, dry air. He hated the weight of his hair against his shoulders, the way the last residues of water filtered through his throat and gills. It made him feel weak, dragging his mind back to that one fated night where he lay on the rough wooden deck of that ship. But he refused to let his discomfort show in front of Shi Qingxuan, afraid that, despite everything, any sign of weakness would be used against him. As he reached for the thing in Shi Qingxuan’s hand, their fingers brushed and He Xuan felt the warmth radiating off the other’s smooth skin. He Xuan’s hand almost burned at the contact, having grown so used to the perpetual frigidness of the water he was being kept in. He realised too late that he let the contact linger for too long, turning it from coincidental to awkward. Shi Qingxuan was unfazed by that, but that might as well be because his thumb twitched curiously towards the webbing between He Xuan’s fingers. He Xuan quickly snatched the cloud-like thing out of Shi Qingxuan’s hand and sank his teeth into it. It was warm and soft and aromatic and to He Xuan’s horror, it elicited a small moan form him as the pleasant taste filled his mouth. He would have cared more, were the person with him anyone else than Shi Qingxuan. But for some reason his presence didn’t bother He Xuan. He only barely managed to resist the urge to lick his fingers.

“Did you like it? It’s my favourite food, especially when it’s fresh like this one. I can get you more if you want, maybe I could ask the cook for a specific filling tomorrow. Is there anything in particular you would like, maybe fish or vegetables? Or something sweet? Hahah, for some reason I can’t really imagine that you enjoy sweet things very much...”

Halfway during his speech, He Xuan’s eyes had drifted to Shi Qingxuan’s mouth, observing the way his lips shaped the countless words that were pouring out from between them. He Xuan found himself so mesmerised that the sudden lack of noise came as a surprise.

He wanted to say something, but his throat felt raw and dry, and only then did He Xuan realise that he was still out of the water. He quickly slid back into the freezing liquid.

Shi Qingxuan crossed his arms. “Rude! You weren’t even listening, He-xiong!”

“Why are you doing this?” He Xuan asked, and he didn’t mean Shi Qingxuan’s ceaseless talking. Shi Qingxuan seemed to realise that as well, because his rigid posture softened slightly and he looked at the ground.

“I…I don’t know, I–“

“If you’re pitying me, there is no need. I’m used to this.”

“No! No, it’s not pity. I mean, I do feel sorry for you, but…I also just like talking to you. You’re a nice person.”

He Xuan’s eyes widened. He had been called many things during his time at the surface, but a nice person was definitely new.

“You’re strange,” he observed, to which Shi Qingxuan replied with a bright laugh.

“I sure am! Everyone agrees on that,” he said, as if it was something to be proud of. And maybe it was, maybe his strangeness was what set him apart from the usual cruelty of human beings.

He Xuan shrugged, “Whatever. Thanks for the food, I suppose.”

“Gladly!” Shi Qingxuan smiled and waved with his stick, “There’s more where that came from. Just you wait, I’ll show you all the best kinds of delicacies. Have you ever had wine?”

He Xuan pulled up an eyebrow. “No,” he said, because he was too proud to ask what wine even was.

Shi Qingxuan started a lecture about grapes this and alcohol that, and He Xuan settled for listening to the cadence of the other’s words more than for the meaning behind it. He liked the sound of Shi Qingxuan’s voice, it was light and carefree and reminded him of the sound of wind against the surface of the ocean.

“He-xiong, are you smiling?” Shi Qingxuan suddenly blurted out and He Xuan snapped out of his reverie, instinctively covering his mouth with his hand.

“No,” he said, more out of reflex, and frowned at Shi Qingxuan. The other laughed at that, and if his voice was the wind against the waves, then his laughter was a gale.

“You were, you definitely were, I saw it, He-xiong!”

“Shut up,” He Xuan muttered and looked at something that was not Shi Qingxuan’s bright eyes. After a moment, the laughter stopped.

“Hey, He-xiong?”

“Hm?”

“Do you miss it?”

“Do I miss what?”

“The ocean.”

He Xuan scoffed, and his voice was more bitter than intended. “Oh, no. I love being kept in a tiny basin without the chance of stretching my tail. I love seeing the same thing each day, every day. I love – “ being alone. But he wasn’t alone, not anymore, not with the whirlwind barely contained in human skin that was Shi Qingxuan.

“I’m sorry…” Shi Qingxuan said, looking so honestly distressed that something in inside of He Xuan softened.

“Whatever. Not like it’s your fault.”

“But it is!” Shi Qingxuan said, so loud that He Xuan’s tail flinched traitorously. “I may not have put you here, but at this moment, I’m the one keeping you!”

“What?”

“It’s the truth, isn’t it? I’m the master of this palace when Gege is gone, and so I’m your captor. I –”

“You’re being ridiculous,” He Xuan interrupted, “What do you intend to do, carry me out of here and straight to the ocean?”

“Yes!”

He Xuan looked at him incredulously.

“I mean, not me alone. But I can ask my friend, and maybe he can ask his…friend,” Shi Qingxuan said, eagerness pitching his voice a bit higher.

“Don’t bother. You’ll get caught, and then you’ll get into trouble. Do you know how much my tail alone weighs out of the water? There is no way two of you weak humans could carry me. Also, I’d die.”

“You what now?”

He Xuan shrugged. “I die when I’m out of the water for too long. What? Isn’t it the same for you when you’re in the water for too long?”

Shi Qingxuan looked shocked at that and He Xuan resisted the urge to laugh cynically.

“It’s fine. I’m used to this. Eventually, your brother will use his last wish, and then he will have no need to keep me here.”

“So…three wishes are all you have? What if he has someone else capture you immediately afterwards, won’t he get three more?”

“…”

“So it’s true?!”

He Xuan sighed. Shi Qingxuan was too clever for his own good. “Maybe your brother hasn’t thought of that. Maybe he just assumes that merfolk can’t grant more than three wishes.”

“Or maybe he doesn’t!” Shi Qingxuan cried, “And then you’ll be here forever, and it will be because of me!”

He Xuan slammed his fist against the glass wall and Shi Qingxuan flinched. “It’s not your fault, okay! This is all on your brother. I’m…I’m not blaming you.” He realized that it was the truth, and that startled him more than anything else. He thought he hate extended to all humans, but apparently, Shi Qingxuan was…too strange for that.

“No,” Shi Qingxuan said stubbornly, and there was resolve clear in his expression. “No, I’m getting you out of here, He-xiong. Just you wait.”

He Xuan sighed. It had taken a year for him to banish all hope out of his heart, and here was Shi Qingxuan, not even planting a seed of it, but an entire tree.

Chapter Text

Shi Qingxuan hopped along the road. He had never felt the stiffness in his leg as much as he did today, when he was in a hurry to get to his destination. Far off in the distance he could see the buildings of the port town, but in his condition it would take him ages still to get there. He could only hope that his Shifu wasn’t in pursuit, determined to teach Shi Qingxuan something about one business practice or the other.

After what felt like days of travel, Shi Qingxuan finally reached Xie Lian’s little abode. It was a few li outside of town, where the rough edges of the coast stretched into the ocean. He used his cane to rap against the crooked door, only to have it swing open at the first contact. For a second, Shi Qingxuan was startled at the image that presented itself to him. Hua Cheng sat on a small stool and Xie Lian stood behind him, his face scrunched up in concentration as he tried (and failed) to braid Hua Cheng’s hair. Two heads immediately snapped in Shi Qingxuan’s direction when the door opened.

“I, uh, can come back later?” Shi Qingxuan offered, even though there was no way he would put this off any longer.

“Ah, Shi Qingxuan, come in, come in!” Xie Lian beamed, abandoning Hua Cheng’s half-done and very crooked braid. Hua Cheng looked like he was ready to murder someone.

“I’m sorry, Your Highness, I didn’t mean to interrupt your…hairstyling?”

“No worries, I can finish later!”

“Gege, am I to run around with half-braided hair now?” Hua Cheng pouted and dramatically slouched on his stool.

“San Lang looks lovely with every hairstyle,” Xie Lian giggled and Hua Cheng’s single eye turned so soft that he looked almost like an entirely different person. Were the situation a different one, Shi Qingxuan would have helped them clear up that strange relationship of theirs, but he was in a hurry.

“Your Highness, I’ve come…I’ve come to ask you for help.”

“No.” said Hua Cheng. Both turned to him, and he crossed his arms.

“We haven’t even heard what he requires!” Xie Lian huffed, but Hua Cheng shook his head.

“He wants us to help him get that fish person out of his brother’s office.”

Shi Qingxuan felt his face heat up and he scratched his neck. “Well…”

“So what? Of course we’ll help!” Xie Lian stated it like it was the most natural thing in the world.

“Your Highness!” Shi Qingxuan beamed, and “Gege!” Hua Cheng complained.

“San Lang, don’t you want to help other –“ Xie Lian stopped himself and his eyes widened, giving him the look of a child who had been caught saying a swearword.

“He’s merfolk, Gege, we don’t exactly get along well.”

“But San Lang, we could really do something good here!”

“What if we get caught and you get into trouble, Gege? I don’t want you to be exposed to any kind of danger.”

Shi Qingxuan looked from one to the other in confusion. Had he missed something, or were they just like…this?

“But you will be there to protect me! Please, if you don’t want to help them, do it for me, San Lang!”

Hua Cheng’s expression shifted immediately, his eye narrowing in endearment and his mouth twitching into a soft smile. “If this is what Gege wants, I will of course provide my services.” 

Shi Qingxuan was getting whiplash from Hua Cheng’s moods, and so he shifted his attention to something he had caught earlier.

“Your Highness, what did you mean by ‘help other…’?”

“Ah, you noticed,” Xie Lian said embarrassed and his ears turned red. “Will you not ignore my babbling?”

“I don’t mind anymore, Gege,” Hua Cheng shrugged, “He’ll find out sooner or later anyway, if he keeps barging in like this.”

Shi Qingxuan had another apology ready on his tongue, but Hua Cheng didn’t give him a chance to say it.

“I’m a dragon,” he said.

“I see,” said Shi Qingxuan.

There was a silence in which only the sound of a bustling street in the distance could be heard. Shi Qingxuan looked from Hua Cheng to Xie Lian.

“Haha, Your Highness’ boyfr– Your Highness’ friend is a funny one.”

“Ah, he sure is. But he’s not joking now.”

The silence was back, and Shi Qingxuan wondered if he had maybe gone crazy.

“Hua Cheng is a what now?”

Hua Cheng sighed, as if Shi Qingxuan’s trouble with accepting the existence of dragons was a minor inconvenience. “Gege, will you please handle the confusion?” he asked with an irritating whine and hugged Xie Lian’s waist from his perch on the stool.

Xie Lian laughed awkwardly and gave Shi Qingxuan an apologetic look, “Well, San Lang is…a dragon. Haha, I was quite baffled when I found out as well.”

Shi Qingxuan didn’t know if he wanted to laugh or cry, and so he settled for an embarrassing noise in between.

“Your Highness, that is not an explanation.”

“He saved me when I fell off a cliff, and ever since then he’s been looking out for me, ha, I don’t know how I deserve such an honour.”

“I’m happy if I can give even a fraction of what Gege deserves,” came Hua Cheng’s comment as he nuzzled Xie Lian’s back. He was so obviously in love that Shi Qingxuan actually felt sorry for him.

“So, Hua Cheng is a…a dragon. One of those…” Shi Qingxuan gestured helplessly, but his hands couldn’t provide the meaning his words were lacking. “Those really big ones?”

Xie Lian chuckled at that, “Yes, his true form is quite large! It’s impressive, really, beautiful even, and very unique.”

“Gege is making me blush,” said Hua Cheng, his voice muffled from where his face was buried in Xie Lian’s robes.

“So, that means…you’re really strong?”

Hua Cheng finally emerged and shot Shi Qingxuan a sarcastic look, “Of course I am.”

“And you could carry He-xiong without trouble?”

Hua Cheng’s eyebrows shot up and Shi Qingxuan realised too late what he’d said.

“Sure, ‘He-xiong’ is insignificant compared to my strength.”

“I’m so glad we can help you, Shi Qingxuan!” Xie Lian said happily and clapped his hands, as if the subject of Hua Cheng being a dragon had been talked about enough.

“Thank you, Your Highness and Hua Cheng. I don’t know how to repay you.”

“You don’t need to!” Xie Lian said at the same time as Hua Cheng said, “With money.”

-     -     -

It was five days since Shi Qingxuan had last visited. He Xuan didn’t want to admit to the disappointment, but the feeling still gnawed at him like a shark at bones. He had gone back to his old routine of drifting in and out of sleep, but where before he had learned to live with the loneliness, he now felt an uncomfortable void in his chest whenever he paid too much attention to the silence. He missed the voice that made him feel like he was outside again, listening to waves lapping against the shore and the wind brushing the surface of the ocean. He missed the presence that was like the sun, brightening the room in a way the windows didn’t manage to. But maybe it had all been a dream after all, or even worse, maybe he had managed to drive Shi Qingxuan away after all, with his non-existent social abilities. When the third day came to a close, He Xuan tried to convince himself that he didn’t need company after all – he had fared well enough so far, and Shi Qingxuan was actually a real nuisance, what with his constant babbling.

He Xuan was laying on the bottom of the basin when he heard the noise. It was dark and the room was illuminated by only the faint glow of the moon outside. Almost a week had now passed since Shi Qingxuan’s last visit and He Xuan had made peace with the fact that he wouldn’t see the other again. It hurt, that realisation, but he knew that the sooner he came to terms with it the better. So it was with some confusion that he realised the noise came from someone opening the door to the room. He Xian was immediately wide awake, willing his eyes to get used to the dark surroundings as quickly as possible. There were three shadows whose contours were visible against the pale light. Thieves, was what first came to He Xuan’s mind, and oh how ironic it was, that he would meet his end not by the hands of Shi Wudu, but by the hands of some lowly street thugs. But then,

“Was that your foot? I’m sorry, San Lang,” a light voice whispered, to which a darker one replied, “No worries, Gege, I didn’t even notice.”

“He-xiong?” a third voice chimed in, and He Xuan’s heart missed several beats. His eyes finally adjusted to the darkness, and there he saw Shi Qingxuan, dressed in dark robes that were very unlike him and accompanied by two people He Xuan had never seen. One of them was dressed in white robes which were only partially covered by a black cloak, while the other wore a very bright red attire that was about as inconspicuous as an emperor in a tavern. He Xuan glared at the red-clad man, who was very obviously a dragon, if the aura of arrogance and superiority that surrounded him like a cloud of butterflies was anything to go by. Why Shi Qingxuan had contact to one of those air-snakes, He Xuan didn’t know.

“Shi Qingxuan?” he said, voice hoarse from the lack of use. “What’s going on?”

“I told you I’d get you out of here,” Shi Qingxuan said and stumbled towards He Xuan’s basin.

“Careful!” He Xuan said as he helplessly watched Shi Qingxuan fall to the floor when his cane caught against the carpet. The person in white hurried towards him and helped him up again before giving He Xuan a tentative smile.

“You must be the He Xuan we’ve been told about?”

He Xuan said nothing, and the red-clad dragon stepped forward with a venomous smile on his face. “Haven’t you been taught that it’s rude to not reply to a question?”

“No worries, no worries, let’s all get along,” the man in white said and laughed awkwardly. For a second, He Xuan was sure that Shi Qingxuan was pulling a prank on him. But Shi Qingxuan had finally reached the basin and pressed a hand against the wall of glass.

“He-xiong, I’m so sorry,” he said, voice as much a plea as I was an apology, “I wanted to come back, I really did, but my Shifu, he…he actually did it, haha, I wouldn’t have thought him to go through with it, but he locked me into my room for five days until I caught up with all the lessons I missed. Such a bother.”

“Yes, being locked up can be bothersome,” He Xuan said dryly, as if he didn’t feel any relief at Shi Qingxuan’s explanation.

“As heart-warming as this reunion is, should we not hurry? Unless, of course, young master Qingxuan would prefer to keep the little fish man here after all,” the dragon said sweetly. He Xuan hissed at him, but the man in white whirled around immediately.

“No! No, you’re right, San Lang, we should hurry.”

“San Lang?” He Xuan said, the name tasting like mockery on his tongue.

“That’s Hua Cheng for you, He-xiong,” the dragon spat.

“Oh?” said He Xuan, his mouth stretching into the imitation of a smile. For one supreme leader of a species to save another was truly the height of irony, considering how much they all hated each other.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, He Xuan. My name is Xie Lian, I’m Shi Qingxuan’s friend,” the white-robed man said happily, either oblivious to or uncaring about the tension in the air. “Should we get you back into the ocean then?”

“Wait,” He Xuan said and turned to Shi Qingxuan, who nodded eagerly. “Won’t this get you into trouble?”

Hua Cheng groaned in the background, but Shi Qingxuan smiled. “Don’t worry about that. My brother won’t harm me, he loves me too much. And what’s a bit of scolding against a lot of freedom? Maybe he won’t even find out that it was me!”

“Okay,” He Xuan said, and warmth spread through his body. “So, how did you plan this?”

“Well…” Shi Qingxuan drawled and, to He Xuan’s horror, Hua Cheng stepped forward and dumped something large into the basin. He Xuan flinched backwards on instinct before he realised that it was a large, thick blanket.

“We wrap you up in this and I drag you back to that precious, dirty ocean of yours,” Hua Cheng said with malicious glee and it took all of He Xuan’s self-control to not leap at the dragon and claw his remaining eye out.

Shi Qingxuan had the decency to look apologetic. “We couldn’t come up with anything less conspicuous. The shore isn’t far from here, so if His Highness and his friend hurry, then you’ll be back in the water in no time.”

“What about you?” He Xuan asked with a frown.

“I’d just be a burden with this,” Shi Qingxuan tapped the cane against his bad leg. He continued before He Xuan could muster strength to tell him that he could never be a burden. “But don’t think you’ll get rid of me just because you’re moving out, haha. I will definitely visit you.”

“Sure. Okay,” He Xuan said. He hesitated for a second, before pushing himself up and dropping something out of the basin. “You can have that. I’ll glow when I’m near.”

It was a small, crystallised tear he’d kept ever since he had lost his family, a last remnant of what they meant to him. He didn’t need it anymore – his grief had long since been replaced by anger.

“Thanks,” whispered Shi Qingxuan and took the gem.

“How touching,” said Hua Cheng and knocked against the glass. “Now, if you would do the honours and wrap yourself up in that blanket.

He Xuan scowled at him, but his desire to leave this hell of a palace was bigger than his desire to preserve his dignity.

“I’ll see you later, He-xiong! Let’s meet on the shoreline behind His Highness’ house!” Was the last thing He Xuan heard before he covered himself with the fabric. Two arms lifted him out of the basin and he was draped over a shoulder. It was uncomfortable and the cloth stuck to his skin and scales, but He Xuan refused to complain. He couldn’t see anything while he was being carried by Hua Cheng and he didn’t know if they were still in the building or not. His tail scraped over the floor, but Hua Cheng didn’t bother with adjusting his position, and He Xuan would rather go mute than ask for it. He could hear his two liberators talk while they made their way to (hopefully) the ocean.

“Thank you for doing this San Lang,” Xie Lian said in his light tone.

“You don’t have to thank me, Gege,” Hua Cheng replied happily (Gege, seriously?) and something sharp dug into He Xuan’s side, “It’s this sea snake that should thank me. Although,” and his tone turned mischievous, “there are some things I wouldn’t mind Gege doing as a thanks.”

He Xuan could imagine at least ten places he’d rather be than perched on the shoulder of a supreme dragon, who shamelessly flirted with his companion while He Xuan’s scales slowly grew drier.

“Haha, San Lang, I can cook something nice for you,” Xie Lian replied and He Xuan had to stifle a mirthless laugh because this obliviousness was exactly what that arrogant dragon deserved. Hua Cheng, however, seemed unperturbed. “I’m happy about everything Gege is willing to give me.”

It went on like that for the whole way and He Xuan wished for the sweet release of death. Maybe being kept in a tiny basin for two more years wasn’t so bad after all. At least he would get to see Shi Qingxuan on a regular basis. Just as he surprised himself with that train of thought, he felt Hua Cheng’s shoulder shift under him, and from one moment to the next He Xuan found himself plummeting downwards. He let out a small yelp and then his back hit something cool and sturdy that shattered under the impact of his body. He was disorientated. The darkness he had been staring at under the blanket made way for a softer one, disrupted by shifting specks of light all around. He Xuan blinked rapidly and then he noticed the current around him.

He stilled.

Somewhere in the distance, He Xuan heard echoing sounds. In front of him was a vast expanse of dark blue. The ocean. He was back. The water moved around him, a gentle embrace that seemed to welcome him. He took a deep breath, feeling the cool but not unpleasant water filter through his gills, fresh and revitalising. He Xuan laughed, he couldn’t stop himself, he laughed and laughed until his throat felt sore from the unfamiliarity of it. He stretched his tail and with one strong motion he propelled himself forwards, further and further. Something broke through the water next to him and He Xuan flinched, too taken up in his newfound freedom. It was a small stone, and He Xuan frowned. Then he remembered the two idiots who had brought him here, and he pushed himself up towards the surface. Hua Cheng and Xie Lian stood at the docks, Hua Cheng with his arms crossed and an annoyed expression while Xie Lian waved excitedly.

“He Xuan!” he called, “How is it to be back?”

He Xuan hesitated for a moment, then the overwhelming feeling of freedom pushed his pride out of the way.

“It’s good. Thank you,” he sighed. “Both of you.”

Xie Lian smiled, but it wasn’t quite as radiant as that of Shi Qingxuan, “No worries, we’re happy to help!”

“But don’t ask anything of us ever again,” Hua Cheng added.

He Xuan scoffed, “Sure.”

“Our house is a little far from here, all the way back theeere,” Xie Lian pointed unnecessarily obviously into one direction. “So, make sure to visit, Shi Qingxuan would definitely be happy.”

“Would he…?” He Xuan murmured, not loud enough for the wind to carry it over to the two men. Well, he was free to do whatever he pleased now, and if he chose to visit that particular part of the ocean, then that was entirely his choice.

-     -     -

Shi Qingxuan stood in the silent and empty office of his brother. He felt a little melancholic at the sight of the empty basin, but at the same time an immense relief flooded through him. He Xuan was finally back to where he belonged. No one deserved to be held captive in such a small space, least of all someone as proud and magnificent as He Xuan. Still, Shi Qingxuan knew that he would see the other a lot less now, and he allowed himself a little sigh at that thought. He slowly made his way out of the room, his cane tapping rhythmically against the floorboards. Tomorrow would be just another day, without being able to look forward to the conversations with He Xuan he had gotten so used to. Ah well, back to studying and exercising and being bored. Shi Qingxuan wondered if he had the right to feel trapped as well.

Three days later, Shi Qingxuan finally got the opportunity to go out again. He had worked diligently for the past days, pretending to be rueful and wanting to make up for his mistakes. His Shifu was delighted, apparently of the opinion that his disciplinary measures had led to the spike in Shi Qingxuan’s motivation. And so, he finally allowed his pupil an afternoon of free time. Shi Qingxuan didn’t even have to think about what he wanted to do, he simply grabbed his cane and a few coins, and made his way down to the town. It was a bright day and the streets were bustling with pedestrians and merchants. Shi Qingxuan bought a large bag of mantous before he turned towards his friend’s hut.

Xie Lian and Hua Cheng both sat outside, with Xie Lian’s head in Hua Cheng’s lap, while Hua Cheng gently stroked his hair. They looked so peaceful than Shi Qingxuan didn’t want to disturb them. Instead, he swerved around in a wide arch, making sure his cane wasn’t too loud against the stones. He reached the coastline after a little while, all jagged stone and rough edges that stretched out into the vast ocean. Some ships were silhouetted against the endless blue, but no other human influence stained the image of flawlessness. Shi Qingxuan carefully sat down on a large, smooth stone from where he had a perfect view of the ocean. He rested his chin on his knees and peaked down at his hands. The small tearstone He Xuan had given him dangled from a delicate chain on Shi Qingxuan’s wrist. It gleamed under the bright sunlight. Shi Qingxuan sighed. He hadn’t exactly expected He Xuan to stick around at all time, waiting for him to visit. No, He Xuan surely had better things to do, with the entire ocean at his disposal. But somewhere deep inside of him, Shi Qingxuan had still hoped.

“Are those mantou?”

“Yes, they are. I bought them in town.”

“Throw me one.”

“Sur– HUH? He-xiong?!” Shi Qingxuan jumped up, or he would have, had his leg not given in under him. He swayed precariously and only just so managed to keep his balance. He didn’t care. His eyes scanned the water below and finally found a dark head poking out of the water. He Xuan frowned up at him and Shi Qingxuan’s heart made a stutter.

He Xuan looked a lot better. The sickly grey tinge to his skin had vanished and left it a flawless white that rendered his scars almost invisible. His dark hair was smooth and shining, and every now and then his tail broke through the surface of the water, an almost fluorescent black. Shi Qingxuan realised he was staring, and he cleared his throat.

“You look great, He-xiong! I’m so happy to see you! The ocean suits you!”

“Yeah, well…” He Xuan made a non-committal shrug. “Glad to see you, as well.”

Something bloomed inside of Shi Qingxuan’s chest and he was overcome with the sudden urge to jump into the water to join He Xuan. Instead, he threw him a mantou. He Xuan caught it mid-air and immediately took a large bite. Shi Qingxuan found it somewhat enticing to see He Xuan’s unusually sharp teeth sink into the soft bun, and he quickly eyed a seashell that lay on the rock in front of him.

“How are you doing?” He Xuan asked after he swallowed the last bite. “Still busy studying?”

“It never ends,” Shi Qingxuan groaned, happy to finally have a shoulder to cry on, “If I have to memorise one more shipping route my head is going to explode. I’m not meant for a seafaring life, I can’t even swim with this leg. I just want to stay home and–“

And what? For the longest time, Shi Qingxuan had had no problem picturing his future. He would become his brother’s assistant, attending social gatherings, take care of the more tedious paperwork, and otherwise indulge in his free time. But now, there was something else…Or rather, someone else.

“You gonna finish that sentence?” He Xuan asked and eyed the bag next to Shi Qingxuan.

“Ah, sorry! I’m tired all the time these days,” Shi Qingxuan laughed, throwing another mantou to He Xuan. It felt like he was feeding fishes. “Anyways, enough of that, tell me of your adventures in the ocean!”

“Not much to say. I have to get familiar with it all again, it’s quite…overwhelming.” He Xuan quickly dipped his head underwater to ease the strain off his voice.

“How do you plan on familiarising yourself with the whole ocean if all you ever do is hang out in our backyard?” came a sardonic voice from behind Shi Qingxuan.

He Xuan choked on his mantou and glared at Hua Cheng, who stepped up to them with his arm wrapped tightly around Xie Lian’s waist.

“Shut up, sky snake,” He Xuan hissed and stuffed the remainder of the bun into his mouth.

“What do you mean?” Shi Qingxuan asked and a premonition that was half hope and half excitement rose up in him.

“Ah, San Lang, don’t tell –“

“Fish boy over there has been creeping around here for the past three days. Almost as if he waited for something.” The grin on Hua Cheng’s face could be called malicious at best.

Shi Qingxuan turned back to He Xuan, who wasn’t looking at him but a point slightly to his left. He couldn’t help the smile that hopefully seemed happy rather than amused.

“Oh. I…if I’d known, I would have come sooner,” he said honestly. And he would have, screw Shifu and his stupid lessons.

“No need to bother,” He Xuan muttered.

“It’s not a bother, He-xiong! Honestly, this is the only thing I’m looking forward to! Let’s make up a meeting time, so you don’t have to stay in this place all the time. How about every other day? Maybe towards afternoon? I’d say every day, but my leg…”

“No worries, young master Qingxuan, I’m sure young master fish has nothing better to do anyway,” Hua Cheng grinned, resting his head on top of Xie Lian’s.

He Xuan looked like he would like nothing more than to jump out of the water and strangle Hua Cheng with his tail.

“Gege, what are you doing,” Hua Cheng asked mildly amused when Xie Lian pushed against his chest to usher him back into the hut.

“Let’s give them some privacy, Hua Cheng, they haven’t seen each other in a while,” Xie Lian huffed helplessly as he was leaning his entire weight against Hua Cheng’s chest. Shi Qingxuan couldn’t help but laugh at the image, while simultaneously feeling strangely envious. If only he could swim better, or He Xuan could walk better. Finally, Hua Cheng relented and budged under Xie Lian’s effort.

“No inappropriate behaviour in our backyard,” he called before Xie Lian shut the door.

“I’m wondering if my freedom was worth associating with that wretched snake,” He Xuan hissed and tentatively swam forward to rest his arms against the rough stone of the coast. Shi Qingxuan took the opportunity to scoot forwards as well, carefully as to not slip and fall into the water. He Xuan’s golden eyes followed his movement, as if he was ready to lunge forward should Shi Qingxuan’s clumsiness take the better of him.

“Has there been any trouble for you?” He Xuan asked quietly in the direction of Shi Qingxuan’s feet.

“Are you worried, He-xiong?” Shi Qingxuan didn’t even try to ban the teasing tone from his voice. “No need, everything is fine, no one else even knew that you were in there, right? And my brother is still gone for some days, so it’s all good!”

“Ah, I see,” said He Xuan, briefly dipping his head underwater again. Shi Qingxuan could see the outlines of the other’s tail, black and gold and shining, even through the murky water. He reached forward, as if his arms were long enough to reach it, but He Xuan emerged again and Shi Qingxuan re-directed his outstretched hand to scratch at neck.

They spent the better part of the afternoon talking – or, Shi Qingxuan talked while He Xuan listened with an expression that might have looked bored to others, but Shi Qingxuan could see the spark of interest in the gold of the other’s irises at some of his blabberings. At some point, Shi Qingxuan had ended up laying on his belly, chin propped up on the back of his hand so that he could be at eye-level with He Xuan. He Xuan’s webbed fingers lay splayed on top of the rocks and Shi Qingxuan noticed that his nails were of the same shining black as his scales.

“- and I never actually went on that boat, so the only time I went sailing was, like…ten years back. I don’t even want to join the business.”

“Then don’t,” He Xuan said, as if it was as easy as that. “Why spend your life doing something you hate? If there is one thing I’ve learned in captivity, it’s that people won’t thank you for putting yourself last. They just take it as a given.”

“But…Gege has always been there for me. I have to be there for him as well.”

“Your Gege,” he spat the word out like an insult, “doesn’t deserve your dedication. Choose for yourself, not for him.”

“I don’t know…” Shi Qingxuan said slowly because never before had he even considered to take his life in his own hands. A sudden loud noise made him flinch and drops of water soaked through his robes when He Xuan slapped the ocean’s surface with his tail.

“Well, I know. Shi Wudu is a horrible person who forces his decisions on everyone.”

Shi Qingxuan knew that he should defend his brother, tell He Xuan that he could be really kind if you knew him better, but something stopped him. Maybe the fact that Shi Wudu held He Xuan prisoner for two years. And so Shi Qingxuan said nothing and stared to the spot where He Xuan’s tail had vanished beneath the water. They sat (or floated) in uncomfortable silence for a moment, before He Xuan sighed.

“Maybe you should go home. It’s getting dark.”

Shi Qingxuan looked up and indeed, the sky was turning orange at the horizon.

“Oh, you’re right! I shouldn’t be too late if I want to stay in Shifu’s good graces,” Shi Qingxuan scrambled painstakingly to his feet.

He realised it the second it was happening, but that was still a second too late.

His robes had tangled underneath his foot and when he took a step to reach for his cane, he stumbled forward with a loud yelp. He squeezed his eyes shut and prepared himself for the impact against rough stone, but it never came. Instead, he made contact with something soft and sturdy and very wet. He groaned at the pain that shot through his leg and tentatively opened his eyes, briefly blinded by the bright light of the setting sun. It took him a moment to make sense of his surroundings and his hands groped at the unfamiliar texture they rested upon. Then, all at once, his senses came rushing back and he realised that what he felt there underneath his fingertips were slick scales, and what he lay upon was another body.

“Ah, He-xiong, what–” he blurted in embarrassment and tried to stand up from where he was sprawled on top of He Xuan. Apparently, the other had dragged himself out of the water as Shi Qingxuan was falling, which led to the very awkward result of Shi Qingxuan’s face pressing into the smooth skin of He Xuan’s back and his hands grasping at He Xuan’s tail. Standing up was more difficult than it seemed, especially with the hasty panic that made Shi Qingxuan even clumsier than usual. He fumbled around, faintly realising how pleasant the even scales felt. When his hand came into contact with one of the small fins on the side of He Xuan’s tail, the other let out a small gasp and finally took pity on Shi Qingxuan by grasping his waist to gently push him to the side.

“Can you not court death for just one day?” He Xuan huffed and rolled onto his back, breathing heavily. His tail twitched against the stone and he looked like a literal fish out of the water.

“Oh gods, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to – I’ve made a mess again, haven’t I? But thank you so much, He-xiong, you saved me!”

“I saved your pretty nose from breaking, you mean?”

“You think my nose is pretty?”

“That’s what you took away from this?”

They stared at each other for a moment before Shi Qingxuan burst out laughing and a small smile tugged at He Xuan’s lips. He looked different like this, with happiness softening the hard edges of his face and the warm light of the sun giving his skin a healthier colour. Shi Qingxuan’s laughter slowly died in his throat when a glint caught his eye. The sun was reflecting off of the shining scales of He Xuan’s tail, making them glimmer like gold.

“Your tail…” Shi Qingxuan murmured and reached out, unable to restrain himself any longer. “It’s so beautiful.” He traced his fingers against the even pattern of scales and marvelled at their sleek texture. He reached one of the fins and hesitated briefly before gently feeling their delicate webbing underneath his digits. It was silky and smooth and felt like it could tear any the faintest touch, but Shi Qingxuan couldn’t help but caress them.

There was a sudden noise, like a stifled moan, and a shudder ran through He Xuan’s tail. That finally snapped Shi Qingxuan out of his reverie, and he looked up to find He Xuan staring at him with an oddly raw expression on his face. Shi Qingxuan felt his own face heating up and he quickly retracted his hand.

“I’m sorry, He-xiong, you’re probably really uncomfortable. Ah, let me help you!” He futilely pushed against the tail to realise that it was a lot heavier than it looked. He Xuan seemed to be stunned, as he didn’t move and just observed Shi Qingxuan’s efforts with that same strange expression.

“Ah, He-xiong, aren’t you drying out?” Shi Qingxuan looked at his friend, whose eyebrows drew together in a familiar frown before he finally huffed and shifted himself to the edge of the stones to plunge back into the water. Seconds later, his head emerged from between the waves.

“You’ll come back in two days’ time?” he asked, somewhat grumpily. His face was redder than normal, probably because he’d been out of the water for so long.

“Of course!” Shi Qingxuan said happily, and added for good measure: “I’m already looking forward to seeing you again, and I haven’t even left yet, haha.”

He Xuan’s face coloured even more, and Shi Qingxuan wondered why that was, now that he was in the water again.

“Hm. I’m. I’m looking forward to it, too.” He Xuan’s voice was quiet, and he was talking more to the waves than to Shi Qingxuan. “Take care. Don’t fall again.”

“Don’t say it like that, He-xiong, you make it sound like I’m clumsy!”

“You are literally the clumsiest person I’ve ever met?”

Were this any other person, Shi Qingxuan would have been offended. But somehow…

“Well, I can be clumsy around you, He-xiong, I know you’ll save me!”

He Xuan’s eyes widened.

-     -     -

He Xuan had been back to the ocean for a while now. He used to dream of it, back when he was still in his small prison; dream of its endless waves stretching far beyond the horizon, dream of the currents that moved the water and gave it live; dream of the freedom he had been robbed of.

Then why was it that, now that he was finally back, he couldn’t bring himself to make use of all that freedom that lay before him. Why didn’t he swim away as far as he could, explore the vast depth right at his fingertips? Why did he stay so close to the land that had held him captive for too long? He knew the answer to that, of course he did, for each of those question had the same answer. But admitting it to himself was a lot different than keeping the knowledge locked away in the back of his mind, and so He Xuan didn’t admit. Instead he waited, each day for the next, because every other day was one worth waiting for.

Every other day he would find himself in the same spot, close to the residence of that damned sky snake and his human companion. He could see them, sometimes, sitting together just a bit too closely for it to be casual. Leaning into each other a bit too often for it to be coincidental. Embracing each other a bit too tightly for it to be just amicable. He Xuan observed them with envy, their close contact and their ever-present touches, knowing it was something he could never have himself. But then, Shi Qingxuan would arrive, a leaf on the wind with his fluttering robes and his chiming laugh. And no matter how much He Xuan tried to ignore it, his heart did a stutter each time Shi Qingxuan called “He-xiong!” and limped across the rough stone as quickly as his bad leg allowed.

“He-Xiong!” he called today as well, all but skipping across the shore. Xie Lian stood to the side, watching his friend with some concern, and He Xuan agreed. Behind Xie Lian, arms wrapped around the others waist and face nuzzled in the crook of his neck, was Hua Cheng, shooting He Xuan a crooked grin while he traced his lips across Xie Lian’s skin. He Xuan would have been annoyed at that, had he not observed how oblivious Xie Lian still was to the dragon’s advances. And so he returned the expression, more poison than smile.

Shi Qingxuan had made his way over to their usual spot without stumbling, falling, or dropping his cane, which was a pretty big accomplishment. He slowly lowered himself down right in front of where He Xuan was perched on the stone. He Xuan could smell Shi Qingxuan’s distinct sent, something he couldn’t name, but that reminded him of the aromatic flowers that sometimes drifted over the ocean.

“Hey!” Shi Qingxuan said with that radiant smile of his, and briefly patted He Xuan’s hand with his own. They weren’t many, the touches they shared between them, but He Xuan treasured even the smallest contact. They made him feel more present, like Shi Qingxuan was an anchor that kept him grounded.

“Hey,” He Xuan replied, his voice always slightly rough in the air. He had gotten used to this way of talking and now managed to stay above the surface longer than before, but he still needed to dip his head underwater every once in a while.

“How are you?” That was always the first thing Shi Qingxuan wanted to know, as if He Xuan’s well-being was an essential thing for him.

“Good,” came He Xuan’s standard answer, because I’m happy to see you was a strange thing to say, wasn’t it? “You?”

“Ah–“ Shi Qingxuan said and looked down a little sheepishly. “I’m good. More or less. I mean, I’m not sick. I…”

“Your brother returns tomorrow,” He Xuan stated. He remembered, had been dreading the day ever since Shi Qingxuan had saved him.

“He does. I’m not worried about it, and you shouldn’t be either, He-xiong! He won’t know it was me, and I won’t tell! But…”

“But you won’t be able to come as often anymore.” He Xuan had been dreading this as well, but there wasn’t much he could do about it. He had always known their days were finite.

“Yes.” Shi Qingxuan looked so unlike himself, with his brows scrunched together and the corners of his mouth tilted downwards. He Xuan reached out and touched his shoulder before he could stop himself.

“Don’t worry,” he said and this time the dry air wasn’t the reason for his voice being hoarse. “I won’t go away. Come whenever you find the time.”

“He-xiong!” Shi Qingxuan said, and was that a quiver in his voice? “You don’t have to stay here all the time! You’re free now, right, please–“

“I’m free.” He Xuan agreed. “So I’m free to stay.”

Shi Qingxuan stared at him and his eyes shone even more than usual. A tear dripped down his cheek and before He Xuan could say something, he lunged forwards and threw his arms around He Xuan’s neck. 

“He-xiong!” he cried, warm breath ghosting across He Xuan’s skin. He was stunned for a moment, uncertain of what to do. Then he remembered the countless times he had observed Hua Cheng wrapping Xie Lian up in his arms, and how the other happily returned the gesture. And so, He Xuan tentatively raised his hands and put them around Shi Qingxuan’s waist, pressing his face against the other’s chest. It was an unfamiliar feeling, and one He Xuan never wanted to let go of. Shi Qingxuan was warm and soft and the way his fingers tangled in He Xuan’s wet hair made him almost shiver.

“You won’t get rid of me then, He-xiong! I’m warning you!” Shi Qingxuan sobbed and He Xuan smiled because there was no one to see it anyway.

“Good,” he said simply, which got him another wail from Shi Qingxuan. He Xuan had never been too fond of routines, but this he could get used to. After a while, Shi Qingxuan disentangled himself from He Xuan’s arms and wiped his face with his sleeves.

“He-xiong, I’m so glad we met.”

He Xuan knew they only met because Shi Wudu had captured him, enslaved him, and kept him locked away for two years.

“Me too.” He said, and it was the truth.

Chapter Text

“Ugh,” came an unwelcome voice from the direction of the hut. “You’re here again? Don’t you ever get tired?”

“No,” said He Xuan stubbornly and lazily flapped his tail against the water, knowing it would annoy Hua Cheng. “What do you want? Don’t you have a human to pine after?”

Hua Cheng didn’t look as annoyed as He Xuan would have hoped. He slouched down on a stone and grinned maliciously at He Xuan. “Shouldn’t you reflect on yourself before looking at others?”

He Xuan didn’t dignify him with an answer – Shi Qingxuan hadn’t visited in four days and that was fine. It was fine. He Xuan wasn’t pining. Hua Cheng sighed.

“Look, as much as it annoys me that you keep hanging around in our backyard, Gege seems to be invested in…whatever your relationship is with Shi Qingxuan. So, I’ll give you some friendly advice: Don’t long for things you can’t get. Learn to be happy with what you have. You’ll save yourself a lot of pain that way.”

He Xuan gave him a suspicious look. It sounded like Hua Cheng spoke from experience, and as much as He Xuan wanted to feign disinterest, his curiosity still won over in the end.

“Your…friend, your Xie Lian…he really doesn’t know, does he?”

“Gege is not mine. I could never hope to possess someone such as him. But for one reason or another, he as deemed me worthy of his company, and that is enough. Being near him is enough. You’d do well to accept that truth for yourself as soon as possible.”

He Xuan pondered his words. His first instinct was to deny their implications – there was nothing more he wanted from Shi Qingxuan than his company anyway. Seeing his smile, hearing his laugh, listening to his enthusiasm was enough to keep He Xuan content. But a small voice, one he was usually good at ignoring, called him out on his delusion. He Xuan was used to keeping his wants simple – freedom and revenge was all he had desired for the past two years. But now…

Hua Cheng, that nasty snake, gave him a condescending smirk. “As I said. Recognise it and accept it.” He got up and dusted off his robes. “As hard as it might seem.”

“Hua Cheng.” He Xuan called after him, and the dragon paused. “I know you don’t want to hear it. But your Gege is not the only one here who’s oblivious. There’s this thing called communication. You should try it.”

Hua Cheng turned now, and finally his expression was pleasantly annoyed. “You don’t know what you’re talking about,” he hissed, and He Xuan half expected him to spew fire. He raised his hands.

“I’m just trading advice for advice.”

“I don’t need your advice, you f–“

“San Lang!”

Hua Cheng’s expression changed from rage to adoration in the matter of a heartbeat.

“Gege, you’re finally back. This sea snake does for the worst company.”

Xie Lian chuckled as Hua Cheng gently gathered him into his arms and lifted him off his feet.

“I missed you too, San Lang.”

He Xuan scoffed. If Hua Cheng wanted to keep living in that perpetual stage of self-inflicted torment, that it was his choice. He Xuan would certainly not play matchmaker for a dragon.

-     -     -

Shi Qingxuan sat at the table and nervously bounced his good leg. His brother sat opposite of him and judging from the stormy expression on his face, he had already discovered the empty basin in his study. But so far he hadn’t mentioned it to Shi Qingxuan, probably still believing him to be oblivious to his secret.

“How was your conference, Ge? Did everything get resolved?”

“Huh? Ah, yes, it went well. Well, with the exception of Pei Ming’s countless inappropriate comments. And Ling Wen’s constant nagging,” Shi Wudu replied absentmindedly.

Shi Qingxuan chuckled. He knew how much his brother valued his partners, despite complaining about them at every opportunity. “I’m glad to hear that.”

“How were things here? Your Shifu told me you neglected your studies in the beginning.”

“Ah,” Shi Qingxuan swallowed, “Yes, but I did realise that they’re important, and–“

“Have there been any strange occurrences?” Shi Wudu asked suddenly, his eyes stern.

“O-occurrences? Ahaha, what do you mean?”

“There is…something missing from my private quarters.”

Shi Qingxuan’s felt his blood run cold. “M-missing? Are you sure you haven’t misplaced it?”

“Yes, quite so. Qingxuan, if you know anything…”

“I don’t know, I really don’t know. I mean, I haven’t seen anyone enter your…your rooms. I just…what is even missing?” Shi Qingxuan asked in an attempt to sound like someone who didn’t know exactly what had happened, but his voice quivered. His brother looked at him with an inquisitive expression. Then he sighed.

“Alright. It’s nothing of importance. Don’t worry about it then.”

“Okay…if you’re sure.”

“I am. Well, don’t you have exercises to do? Your leg still doesn’t seem any better.”

Shi Qingxuan didn’t tell him that it would probably never be.

-

After five days, Shi Qingxuan became almost crazy with desperation. He Xuan was probably waiting for him, and he was leaving his friend hanging. Ever since Shi Wudu’s return, Shi Qingxuan’s workload seemed to have increased tenfold, leaving him no time for a visit to Xie Lian’s hut. But this afternoon there was finally nothing scheduled, and Shi Qingxuan hastily left the palace before anyone could come up with something for him to do. He quickly hobbled down the stairs and towards the town. The fresh air and noises of commerce made him feel instantly more alive, and the pain in his leg seemed to fade with each step he took. He hoped, prayed, that He Xuan would be there.

When Xie Lian’s hut came into sight, Shi Qingxuan saw its two inhabitants sitting in front of it and…was Xie Lian feeding the ancient and venerable dragon congee?

“Shi Qingxuan, hello!” called Xie Lian and waved wildly.

“Ah, it’s young master Qingxuan,” greeted Hua Cheng and grinned. “Finally!”

Shi Qingxuan looked at him puzzled. “Good day, Hua Cheng. Hello, Your Highness.”

“Gege made some fantastic congee, would you like some?” Hua Cheng asked, and there was mischief in his voice.

Shi Qingxuan peaked into the bowl Xie Lian was holding – the…concoction inside was a colour yet to be defined by humankind, and its consistency seemed more like dough than congee.

“Ahaha, no, I wouldn’t want to impose,“ Shi Qingxuan said quickly.

“Not at all, Shi Qingxuan, I made enough for–“

“Don’t worry about him, Gege, he wants to see his snake” said Hua Cheng and grabbed Xie Lian’s hand that was still holding the spoon. He guided it towards his face, but “accidentally” missed his mouth, so that his lips pressed against Xie Lian’s fingers instead. Hua Cheng didn’t seem to mind the congee that spilled all over his red robes. Xie Lian’s face heated up and he laughed awkwardly.

“San Lang, what are you doing,” he murmured, but it sounded more affectionate than anything.

“He’s sulking around in the back,” Hua Cheng jerked his head in the direction of the hut. “He hasn’t left once, so bothersome.”

Shi Qingxuan’s heart made a small leap and he felt himself smile. “Thank you. I will greet him then.”

“You do that,” Hua Cheng grinned and the unspoken Stop bothering Gege and me echoed through the following silence.

Shi Qingxuan quickly limped around the hut and was greeted with…nothing. The shore behind was empty save for a few seagulls that leapt into the air when he approached. Disappointment surged through him and he sighed. His hand automatically clutched his wrist, where the tearstone He Xuan had given him dangled from its chain. Maybe Hua Cheng had just been teasing. What did Shi Qingxuan expect? That He Xuan would really wait for him, even if he didn’t show up for five whole days? That He Xuan would have nothing better to do than to wait for a limping human with too much to say, of too little relevance? That –

“What are you standing there for? Isn’t your leg growing tired?”

Shi Qingxuan’s eyes snapped up. There, propped up on a stone, tail swaying in and out of the water, slouched He Xuan with a familiar frown on his face.

“He…xiong?” Shi Qingxuan asked and realised with horror that his voice was wavering.

“Yes? Did you expect anyone else? I can leave if –“

“No!” His voice echoed through the stretch of space between them and Shi Qingxuan hurried to cross it. “No, please, stay, I…” What did he mean to say? I missed you? I’m glad you’re still here? I was afraid you’d left me?

“I’m happy to see you!”

Weak.

“How are you? Did your brother hurt you?” He Xuan asked and then his eyes widened slightly, as if he had caught himself saying something he didn’t intend. “I mean...”

Shi Qingxuan sheepishly ducked his head and looked down to his feet. “No, he didn’t. He would never. He doesn’t know it was me, and I don’t think he even suspects me. I do feel kind of bad, lying to him like that. I mean, I’m sure he’d understand, but I still think he would be really disappointed and then maybe he’d keep me from visiting you–“

“Which he couldn’t do. Right?” He Xuan interrupted, his voice strangely toneless.

“I mean…” Shi Qingxuan started, which deepened He Xuan’s frown. “He could lock-”

“Yes, he loves doing that, doesn’t he?”

Shi Qingxuan flinched. “Please, I know what he did was horrible, and I know that…that’s it’s inexcusable, but…well he’s my brother. He has always cared for me, after our parents died, always made sure I had a good life. He’s trying to protect me.”

For a moment, He Xuan looked like he wanted to say something, his eyes determined and hard, but then his rigid posture deflated, and he sighed. “I know. I…I guess I’m too out of touch with the concept of family to understand. I will never forgive him, and I will always hate him for what he did. But it would be unfair to do the same to you. I just…want you to see that you shouldn’t let him control your life. That’s all.”

Shi Qingxuan felt a sting in his heart, and he moved forwards almost automatically, dropping down in front of He Xuan.

“Thank you, He-xiong. I’m trying.”

He Xuan nodded sharply. “Just do what you want, Shi Qingxuan. Nothing more. Nothing less.”

Shi Qingxuan felt his eyes sting, maybe because of the bright sun, maybe because of the salty breeze, maybe because of the soft words.

“You can have a family, He-xiong,” he said quietly.

He Xuan looked at him for a long time, his gaze boring into Shi Qingxuan’s eyes as if he was trying to read his intentions. Shi Qingxuan didn’t know what he found, but a small smile appeared around the corners of He Xuan’s mouth, barely visible but still there.

“I would like that,” he said slowly.

Shi Qingxuan beamed. “So, He-xiong, tell me about your day. Or your week. Surely you haven’t been here the whole time? Hah, Hua Cheng would probably not allow that. Xie Lian, on the other hand, is always happy about more company. Unless it’s his cousin, there is some bad blood. Has Qi Rong been around? Did you see him? Or hear him, people usually hear him, he’s very loud.” Shi Qingxuan realised he was babbling again, but he couldn’t stop himself because for the last five days, there had been no one to listen to him. He felt his smile slowly drop and was just about to make a hasty apology, when He Xuan shrugged.

“So that was his name. Someone did come over, very loud, very obnoxious. I don’t know what happened, but later Xie Lian told Hua Cheng “That wasn’t necessary, but thank you” so I guess that was that.”

Shi Qingxuan was flooded with relief when He Xuan didn’t show a hint of annoyance with him, and so he took it as a permission to continue. “Oh, I bet Hua Cheng scared him away, he does that to people who mistreat His Highness. But he’s a good person. Dragon. A good dragon. He cares very much.”

He Xuan scoffed. “Well, pity they’re both so stupid.”

“He-xiong! They’re not stupid, they’re just…” Shi Qingxuan searched for a fitting word in the usually vast supply he kept in his brain, but he somehow didn’t find it.

“Yes. What I said.”

Shi Qingxuan snorted. “Well, as long as they’re happy.”

Afternoon turned into evening as Shi Qingxuan kept telling He Xuan about everyone he considered interesting enough to mention. Which was basically everyone he knew. He Xuan had at least one sarcastic comment for each person Shi Qingxuan brought up, even though he had never met them. (“Feng Xin used to follow his Highness everywhere.” “Are you sure you’re talking about a person and not a dog?”). Eventually the sun touched the ocean and turned the water into a pool of warm reds and oranges, and He Xuan looked at the darkening sky as if it had offended him on a personal level.

“It’s getting late,” he said, sounding like he would do something against it if he could. Shi Qingxuan chuckled at the sight of his unhappy face and reached out to ease the frown between his brows. He Xuan flinched briefly when Shi Qingxuan’s warm fingers made contact with his cold skin, but it still had the desired effect. His expression softened and he looked away, almost as if embarrassed. Shi Qingxuan was tempted to ask His Highness for a room for the night, but something stopped him. He would like to say it was his fear of Hua Cheng, but unfortunately, it was something much simpler.

“Don’t make me wait for five days again,” He Xuan said suddenly, still without looking at Shi Qingxuan. “The sky snake won’t stop bugging me when I’m here alone.”

Shi Qingxuan felt a warm feeling in his chest from this simple request for company.

-

Just do what you want, Shi Qingxuan. Nothing more. Nothing less.

Those words had stuck with Shi Qingxuan in a way no other ever had. He kept repeating them to himself, willing their essence to seep into his consciousness. They went against everything he had been taught, and his brother would probably faint if he knew Shi Qingxuan had turned them into a mantra, but they made Shi Qingxuan hopeful. Hopeful that there might still be a future for him that wasn’t defined by others.

He put the words into action every day. His Shifu, ever vigilant and ever cautious, still kept a close eye on him during the hours before noon, making sure he stayed on top of his studies. But the afternoons were Shi Qingxuan’s, and he had convinced his brother that walking into town was just as helpful for his recovery as the dull exercise he’d been prescribed. When he arrived at Xie Lian’s house only two days after having visited, Hua Cheng looked up in surprise while he braided flowers into Xie Lian’s hair.

“Back so soon?” he asked, looking mildly amused. “Not that I’m complaining. Maybe the sea snake will stop being insufferable with a bit of company.”

“He Xuan is not insufferable,” Xie Lian chided and reached behind him to gently slap Hua Cheng’s fingers. Instead of pulling back, Hua Cheng readily offered his hand for Xie Lian’s punishment. “He’s just very lonely. I think it’s great that you’re keeping him company, Shi Qingxuan! Don’t you think it’s important to have someone who cares about you, San Lang?”

Xie Lian couldn’t see Hua Cheng’s expression from where he sat in front of him, but Shi Qingxuan could. The dragon’s eyes were wide and full of adoration as he looked down at his companion. “Of course I do, Gege. It’s the most important thing in the world.” Xie Lian beamed and turned around to him, and Hua Cheng quickly cleared his expression of its longing.

Shi Qingxuan hurried to give them their privacy, even though he knew nothing would really happen. It was a shame, he thought, that they both refused to acknowledge the deep and unbreakable bond between them.

“He-xiong!” he called as soon as his friend came into sight. “I brought mantou!”

He Xuan looked like he was just short of lifting himself out of the water. “Qingxuan? You’re here already?” His eyes flicked from Shi Qingxuan to the bag he was carrying and back again. “How come?”

Shi Qingxuan shrugged. “I’m doing what I want to,” he said simply.

He Xuan looked stunned, his tail flopping into the water with a loud pang. He cleared his throat. “Oh. Good.”

Shi Qingxuan grinned and threw him a mantou.

-

The longer their little meetings continued, the more Shi Qingxuan found himself longing. Longing for the freedom he could sometimes hear underneath He Xuan’s words when he spoke about the ocean. Longing for the easiness that always came with their conversations, like they were the most natural thing in the world. Longing for what Hua Cheng and Xie Lian had, always together, never under obligation. The longing bled into all aspects of Shi Qingxuan’s life – he was distracted during his studies, barely kept up his exercises (which were useless anyway) and spent much time daydreaming about what could be.

His brother, always the perceptive one, noticed. Shi Qingxuan was surprised at first, when he found the breakfast table already occupied, but it quickly became apparent why his brother had joined him.

“So. How are you doing, Qingxuan. Your Shifu tells me you’re somewhat…distracted lately.”

“Huh? Distracted? H…how so?” Shi Qingxuan asked his plate. He could practically hear Shi Wudu frowning – he hated being talked to without maintaining eye contact.

“You’re falling behind on your studies. You’re not exercising anymore. You spend a lot of time in town.”

Shi Qingxuan swallowed and gathered all his courage. “Well, that’s…that’s what I want to do…”

“But what for? You’re not gaining anything by it. Isn’t it just an idle waste of time? Think of your future.”

I am. Shi Qingxuan didn’t say. His brother sighed. “I just worry. Please take care of yourself.”

“Okay, Ge. I’m sorry for worrying you.”

Shi Wudu nodded curtly and excused himself soon after, leaving Shi Qingxuan to finish his meal in silence.

Despite the sliver of doubt in his chest, Shi Qingxuan made his way towards the town as soon as his Shifu let him go. The day was overcast, but that never bothered Shi Qingxuan. He didn’t mind the rain, and He Xuan seemed to enjoy it, as it made being above surface more bearable.

“No mantou today?” The vendor he usually purchased food from called after him, and Shi Qingxuan gave him a smile and a quick apology. He firmly clutched the pouch he was carrying to his chest. In it was some water chestnut cake he had made himself. Shi Qingxuan had never cooked before, and he wasn’t sure if the servant’s “Ah, that tastes delicious, young master!” when he’d asked her to try his first attempt at making food had merely been a white lie or the truth. But for some reason he’d felt the need to make something for He Xuan, and since he was practicing the whole “do what want to do” thing he thought he’d might as well give it a shot.

When he reached Xie Lian’s hut, it was empty. That wasn’t too unusual – the two often went out, be it on a stroll or to buy groceries – so Shi Qingxuan didn’t think any of it. The beach behind the hut was empty as well – also not unusual since He Xuan actually did do other things than wait for Shi Qingxuan the whole day. And so, Shi Qingxuan sat down on a rock right by the water and watched the ocean, keeping his eyes peeled for any small ripple that could announce the arrival of a certain someone. After a few moments, the first raindrops hit his nose and soon they played a calming melody on the surface of the ocean. Shi Qingxuan smiled to himself. Who’d have thought that the fancy young master of the grand palace would let himself get soaked through by the rain?

Suddenly an icy hand clutched his wrist, long, elegant fingers curling around it. Shi Qingxuan let out a startled yelp would have tumbled backwards; were it not for that hand that held him in place. He Xuan shot him a smirk.

“You’re living a dangerous life, Qingxuan. Just think of all the dangers that might be lurking underneath the surface you so casually observe.”

Shi Qingxuan recovered quickly and smiled back, “I’m not too worried. I have a friend who lives there, he would never let anything happen to me.”

He Xuan gave him a strange look but didn’t let go of his wrist. Instead, Shi Qingxuan felt his fingers trace gentle circles against the skin.

“You’re so trusting,” he murmured.

“But I’m right, no?” Shi Qingxuan drew his hand back, only to lace his fingers through He Xuan’s as far as the webbing would allow him.

“You are.”

Shi Qingxuan felt warm, despite the coldness of He Xuan’s skin. He refused to let go of his hand, so Shi Qingxuan had to twist a bit awkwardly to reach the pouch that was lying next to him.

“He-xiong, I made you something,” he said a bit sheepishly. “I’m not sure if it’s good, but I tried my best, so please have a taste.”

He Xuan’s golden eyes widened in surprise and his fingers became slack between Shi Qingxuan’s.

“You…made something? For me?”

Shi Qingxuan held out the pouch as an answer and He Xuan lunged for it as if he were afraid it was only a temporary offer. But Shi Qingxuan held it just out of his reach and smiled happily. “Of course I did! I’ve always wanted to, but only today did the cook allow me in the kitchen.” He pulled one of the sticky cakes out of the pouch and held it to He Xuan, who quickly snatched it out of his hand.  

“It smells…sweet?”

“It’s water chestnut cake. I thought you might like it, because…” he trailed off and felt heat rise into his face.

“Because it has water in its name?” He Xuan smirked and spared the sweet only a quick glance before he popped it completely into his mouth. He chewed in silence for a while and it was in times like this that Shi Qingxuan wished he wasn’t so hard to read.

“How is it?” he blurted after he couldn’t stand it any longer. He Xuan swallowed and gave him a non-descriptive look.

“Ah, don’t torture me like this, He-xiong!” Shi Qingxuan whined and leaned forwards to flick He Xuan’s forehead. His hand got caught before it made contact. He Xuan considered the fingers for a moment, then he smirked and brought them to his mouth to lick at the residue sweetness that clung to them. Shi Qingxuan was stunned. He Xuan’s tongue was warm against his fingers, softly cleaning them of sugar.

“It’s good,” He Xuan said against Shi Qingxuan’s thumb and smiled.

“Ah…” was all Shi Qingxuan could muster and he was sure his face was brightly red. When He Xuan let go of his hand, Shi Qingxuan was still unable to move, staring at his friend. Then the paralysis finally fell away and without even intending to do so, Shi Qingxuan lifted his fingers and touched them to his lips. He Xuan’s eyes widened, their golden shine a shade darker than usual. There was an unfamiliar tension in the air, and Shi Qingxuan had no idea how to handle it, so he did what he usually did in such situations. He talked.

“Ahaha, I’m so glad He-xiong likes my cooking, maybe I should do it more often then, make sure to train and become a master cook so that I can make various things for you. If the cook lets me into the kitchen again that is, I think I accidentally broke three pots today, hah.” His voice was a bit higher than usual and sounded unnatural even to his own ears. But He Xuan smiled.

“Whatever you cook, I’ll gladly be your tester for that. After all, I…” he trailed off and the smile on his face was replaced by a look of horror. Shi Qingxuan looked at him confusedly as he pushed away from the stone.

-     -     -

He Xuan felt like all the water had been drained from the ocean, leaving him helpless on the dry, unforgiving land. All the warmness and contentment he had been granted for these past weeks were ripped out of his hands again. He saw Shi Qingxuan out of the corner of his eyes, looking at him with an expression halfway between worry and confusion. Then he, too, heard the steps approaching from behind him and turned to face the newcomer.

“Shi Qingxuan. What is the meaning of this?” Shi Wudu asked, his voice freezing cold. Shi Qingxuan flinched and he tried to stand, but his leg gave out under him as soon as he put weight on it.

“Ge! What…what are you doing here? How…did you follow me?” Shi Qingxuan panted through the pain he must be feeling. He Xuan fought his strong desire to simply vanish beneath the waves and leave. But he couldn’t. Not now, not while Shi Qingxuan was in trouble because of him. Shi Qingxuan could tell him a thousand times that his brother would never hurt him, He Xuan wouldn’t put it beneath Shi Wudu to hurt his own family.

Shi Qingxuan scrambled for his cane and painstakingly got to his feet, but Shi Wudu went past him and towards the edge of the shore.

“You,” he said to He Xuan. “How dare you mislead my brother?”

“Ge, he didn’t mislead me! We…we were just talking! He-xiong is my friend!”

Shi Wudu became very still. “He-xiong? Is that what you call this creature?”

Shi Qingxuan limped forwards and reached for his brother arm, clutching the fluttering sleeve tightly. “Ge, please! He’s a good person, he would never do anything bad!”

Shi Wudu’s gaze turned from solid ice to liquid fire and he snarled at He Xuan. “Are you happy? Manipulating him like this, making him believe you’re just a poor victim? As if you and your kind haven’t been dragging sailors to their deaths.”

“Is that your excuse for murdering my family? For keeping me in that prison for two years?” He Xuan spoke now, rage replacing his fear. “Do you think you can justify your actions by some untrue claim like that?”

Shi Qingxuan pulled at his brother’s sleeve. “Ge, please, please just let it be! He-xiong didn’t do anything, he’s really innocent!”

Shi Wudu yanked his arm out of his brother’s grip, who swayed precariously on the spot. He Xuan was ready to lunge forward should he even come close to falling into the water. But Shi Qingxuan caught himself and continued to look pleadingly at Shi Wudu. But the other just scoffed.

“Shi Qingxuan, when will you finally grow up? Your naivety needs to stop. One of his ilk,” he pointed to He Xuan, “is responsible for the death of our parents!”   

“No, but our parents…their ship sank…”

“And who do you think is responsible for that!”

Shi Qingxuan’s eyes flicked over to He Xuan, who could feel a strange pain in his heart, as if a crack ran right through it. But then Shi Qingxuan’s gaze grew determined.

“No.” He said.

“No?”

“It wasn’t He-xiong. You have no right to condemn him for something his…his distant relatives may or may not have done!”

He Xuan and Shi Wudu both stared at him in disbelief.

Then, “Great. Fantastic.” Shi Wudu said and turned his eyes back to He Xuan. “I hope you’re happy. Is this what you consider your revenge? Fine. But I won’t let you corrupt him any longer. Here is my third wish. I wish for you to leave, and that you never talk to Shi Qingxuan again. Don’t even come near him anymore.”

He Xuan stared at him. The words hung in the air and he couldn’t quite make sense of them. His eyes slowly shifted from Shi Wudu to Shi Qingxuan. He wanted to say something, assure him that his brother’s wish had no meaning. But a sharp pain ran though his chest and it felt like he was burning from the inside out. He knew the feeling, it was the same he’d felt the first time he tried to deny Shi Wudu his wish.

“He-xiong? He-xiong!”

He heard Shi Qingxuan’s voice, cutting though the haze in his mind and He Xuan saw how he stumbled forward, trying to reach out for him. The pain in his chest intensified and all his senses yelled at him to flee. He distantly saw Shi Wudu holding his brother back, keeping him from jumping into the water. His cold eyes were still trained of He Xuan.

“Leave.” He said again.

And He Xuan did. His body didn’t allow him to stay and moved almost on its own. After one last glance at Shi Qingxuan, struggling against his brother’s hold and calling out to He Xuan, he turned and dipped beneath the waves. The farther he carried himself away, the less unbearable the pain became. But, to his horror, there was a different kind of pain replacing it, and instead of being on fire, his heart now felt like a large part was missing.

Chapter Text

“Shi Qingxuan. You need to eat. Stop acting like a child.” Shi Wudu’s voice cut through the silence and Shi Qingxuan looked up from his full plate. He gave a curt nod and picked up his chopsticks. His brother frowned and shook his head. He didn’t understand. Of course not. He understood now as little as he had back then. Shi Qingxuan had begged him, three weeks ago on the beach. Had fallen down to his knees, clutched his brother’s robes, and begged him to take back the wish. But no matter how often he repeated that He Xuan hadn’t manipulated him, that he genuinely liked and cared for him, his brother hadn’t listened. Eventually, Shi Wudu had grabbed his elbows and pulled him to his feet, almost roughly so.

“Stop it. You have to have realised it by now! It was all just a lie, stop keeping it alive!” he had yelled, shaking Shi Qingxuan as if that could get rid of all his memories. “Soon you’ll realise, and you’ll thank me!”

But Shi Qingxuan didn’t realise. Not after a day, not after a week, not after two. The only thing he truly knew was that he missed He Xuan, missed him more than anyone ever before. It was as if there was a hole in his chest, large and gaping, and consuming every tiny slice of happiness that tried to steal into Shi Qingxuan’s life. He didn’t visit Xie Lian anymore. In fact, he avoided leaving the house entirely. He stayed inside, diligently pursuing his studies and doing his exercises. At least that would make his brother happy, right? Then why did he look at Shi Qingxuan with such hard eyes, as if something displeased him? Shi Qingxuan didn’t know.

Just do what you want, Shi Qingxuan. Nothing more. Nothing less.

The words kept repeating in his head, spoken in the same soft yet determined tone He Xuan had used for them. Especially now, during the early hours of evening, they echoed through the silence of his room. But what he wanted was impossible. He would never see He Xuan again.

“Shi Qingxuan.” His brother’s stern voice called through the door. “You have a visitor.”

Shi Qingxuan looked up from his book. Who would visit at such a late hour? Actually, who would visit at all? He didn’t answer; there was no need to. Eventually, the door still opened.

“Shi Qingxuan? Are you alright?” Xie Lian poked his head into the room and his eyes immediately settled on Shi Qingxuan, slumped in front of his desk. “Of course not. I’m sorry.” He stepped inside and closed the door behind him.

“Your Highness? What…why are you here?” Shi Qingxuan asked, surprised at how well his voice worked. He didn’t use it much these days.

Xie Lian scratched his neck. “I…well, I was worried, you know. I haven’t seen you in ages and so I decided to check up on you. Hah, I expected your brother to send me away, but he seemed…almost relieved to see me?” Xie Lian sat down opposite of Shi Qingxuan and gave him a worried look. “You seem tired. And sad.”

Shi Qingxuan looked at the table and shrugged. Xie Lian sighed and stood again, only to drop down right next to Shi Qingxuan. “It’s alright,” he said and tentatively laid an arm around Shi Qingxuan. “If you need a shoulder to cry on, then you can take mine.”

Shi Qingxuan choked out a laugh that quickly turned into a sob.

“He’s gone,” he said and looked at Xie Lian because he knew he would only find understanding in the other’s eyes. “He’s gone and I can’t see him again.” And finally, after three weeks, Shi Qingxuan let go of all the painful restraint. He slumped forwards against Xie Lian, who wrapped his arms around him and gently patted his back.

“Shi Qingxuan, I’m so sorry. I don’t…I don’t know what to say. San Lang already told me that he couldn’t feel He Xuan’s aura anymore, so I… Ah, Shi Qingxuan…I’m sorry.”

Of course Shi Qingxuan knew that there was nothing Xie Lian could do, but the certainty somehow still crushed the last bits of hope he had. Xie Lian had always seemed so resourceful, as if he had a solution for every single problem in the world. But Xie Lian was only human…

“Ge sent him away,” Shi Qingxuan sobbed against Xie Lian’s already tear-stained shoulder, “He wished him away, and now he can’t return. Why would he do that?”

It felt strange, questioning his brother like this, when he had always been the more sensible one of them. But in these three weeks Shi Qingxuan still hadn’t managed to find out why Shi Wudu would do something so terrible to him. If only he had listened.

“Y-your Hua Cheng? He…he can’t do anything either?”

Xie Lian’s arms tightened. “He said that his abilities often don’t work on others of his kind.”

Shi Qingxuan made a sound he would have been embarrassed about, was there room for any other emotion than sadness in his chest.

Xie Lian pulled away abruptly and took Shi Qingxuan’s face in his hands. “But I will still tell San Lang to look for your He Xuan. Maybe he’ll find him. And if not, then at least we tried! Don’t give up hope yet, Shi Qingxuan! The ocean isn’t even that big, where could he have gone?”

Shi Qingxuan snorted through his tears and nodded, “Thank you, Your Highness. Your support means a lot. I couldn’t wish for a better friend!”

“No need to thank me, everyone would do this!”

Shi Qingxuan doesn’t disagree, even though he’s a hundred percent sure that Hua Cheng would definitely not help him, were he not unhealthily devoted to Xie Lian. So instead he says:

“Your Highness, please thank Hua Cheng from me as well. I know he has some…reservations when it comes to He Xuan.”

Xie Lian waved with his hands and laughed as he always did when his dragon was concerned – half in embarrassment, half in endearment.

“He just acts all tough, in reality he’s very kind and soft.”

Shi Qingxuan wanted to say that Hua Cheng was many things, but soft was certainly not one of them. But this was Xie Lian, and Xie Lian knew only the San Lang version of Hua Cheng, which was, for the lack of a better term, indeed soft.

“Your Highness…I hope you know how lucky you are,” Shi Qingxuan said and couldn’t quite get all the melancholy out of his voice.

Xie Lian nodded, and suddenly he looked pensive. “Yes…Yes, I guess I do.”

-    -     -

He Xuan drifted. He had an entire ocean at his fingertips, and he would have given it all away for one small patch of water right next to a rocky beach. For all the openness and all his freedom, he just kind of…existed. The water around him was empty, its depths filled with nothing but unwanted solitude. He tried to return often. Sometimes on purpose, sometimes involuntarily, as if Shi Qingxuan’s presence still drew him in even with so much distance between them. But each time the pain forced him to stop. On some days he made it further than on others, embracing the white-hot fire in his chest as a part of him, as something he could live with if only he tried hard enough. But eventually, he still had to submit to his own weakness. One day, he made it so far that he saw the shore appearing at the edge of the horizon. He imagined that he heard Shi Qingxuan’s voice, happily chatting with Xie Lian about everything and nothing. Something inside of him cracked. It felt as if his insides were melting, as if they dripped against his bones and made them wither away. He Xuan coughed and the water around him turned a scorched dark red. He had to turn around. The pain was too much. And as he left the shoreline behind, the searing heat vanished, replaced by a chill so cold He Xuan was sure it would freeze him in place.

-     -     -

Shi Qingxuan stared at the huge vessel before him. He was by no means a stranger to ships; he couldn’t be even if he wanted to, but he still found himself intimidated by the looming mast and the sails that obscured the sun.

“Are you just going to stare, or will you join me eventually?” his brother asked faintly bemused from the deck. Shi Qingxuan swallowed and took a few tentative steps up the gang plank. It swayed underneath his feet and he clutched his cane a little tighter. Shi Wudu sighed and met him halfway to help him up onto the deck.

“I would doubt that you are part of the largest nautical company of the realm, were I not your brother,” he said flatly.

“Well, it’s certainly not by choice,” Shi Qingxuan answered and was surprised at how bitter it came out. His brother threw him a displeased look but didn’t comment further.

Water was definitely not Shi Qingxuan’s element. He peaked over the railing into the surging waters below, dark and threatening. He wouldn’t be so afraid, he thought, if he knew there was someone there to safe him should he fall. But the ocean was empty, and for all he knew everything underneath the water’s surface wanted to kill him. A firm hand landed on his shoulder.

“I’m proud of you, Qingxuan. You’re finally following the right path.”

Shi Qingxuan didn’t reply. His brother had looked so relieved when Shi Qingxuan had told him that he wanted to accompany him on the next sea voyage. Shi Wudu had immediately let a cabin be prepared for Shi Qingxuan and talked him through the general procedures again, even though Shi Qingxuan had never been allowed to forget them in the first place. But Shi Wudu was pleased, and Shi Qingxuan couldn’t bring himself to tell his brother the real reason for his decision.

He Xuan was out there, and as far as Shi Qingxuan knew, he was still close. Xie Lian, wonderful, resourceful Xie Lian, had come running one day, waving his arms and barely able to conceal his excitement.

“San Lang has sensed He Xuan!” he had whispered as soon as they were in Shi Qingxuan’s room. “It was faint, but he’s still here! You can still find him, Shi Qingxuan!”

Shi Qingxuan had almost cried.

And so he had decided that it was time to break through his streak of staying off the water and join his brother on one of his ventures. But right now, Shi Qingxuan definitely started to doubt his decision because the ship had started moving and he felt like throwing up. His brother was somewhere on deck shouting instructions while Shi Qingxuan clutched the mast and tried not to faint.

The other sailors threw him amused glances, but he didn’t care. He was doing what he wanted, and what he wanted was to stay away as far from the railing as possible for the rest of the journey.

“Hey, did you see that?” One of the sailors yelled at his companion. “Was that a dolphin?”

“EH?” Shi Qingxuan gasped, let go of the sturdy mast, and swayed over to the sailors. His cane was all but useless on the ship, barely managing to provide the necessary support to keep standing. One of the sailors reached out to catch Shi Qingxuan, but he battered the hand away and fell against the railing. “What did you see?” he asked urgently. “Was it a tail?”

The sailors passed an insecure look between them. They clearly thought him crazy, but didn’t dare to speak rudely to the younger brother of their employer.

“It, uh…it was just a fish, I think?”

“Was it black?” Shi Qingxuan asked impatiently.

“No, it was…it was grey, I think?”

Shi Qingxuan groaned and let himself slump to the ground. “If you see anything black, let me know!”

The sailors nodded and quickly went their way, as if they couldn’t get away from him fast enough.

“Is this why you’re here?” Shi Qingxuan looked up. His brother stood in front of him, arms crossed and brow furrowed. “To find that creature?”

“His name is He Xuan,” Shi Qingxuan muttered. Shi Wudu shook his head, turned around, and walked briskly away. Shi Qingxuan waited for the pang of guilt, but it never came.

The first day dragged on without anything happening. After the first bout of fear had passed, it became simply…boring. There was nothing to do on the ship and Shi Qingxuan regretted not bringing anything to read with him. He limped across the deck, but nothing really caught his interest. And so he resorted to staring into the water, desperately looking for a familiar shadow to pass by. It was unlikely and Shi Qingxuan knew that. But his brother had wished for He Xuan to never approach Shi Qingxuan again – and right now, it was the other way around. He didn’t know how these wishes worked, but maybe they left room for those loopholes.

Dinner was a lonely affair, even though they all ate together on deck. Shi Qingxuan retreated into a corner farthest away from the crowd and kept observing the waves. They had something soothing about them, now that their scariness had lost its edge. The sun dipped beneath the water and soon, the black sky transitioned seamlessly into the black water. How easy it would be, Shi Qingxuan thought, for this black water to sink their ship. But the air was still, and there was no indication of an oncoming storm.

“He-xiong?” Shi Qingxuan asked the silent water. It didn’t answer.

“Qingxuan. You should go to bed. It’s going to be an early day tomorrow.” His brother looked at him with a neutral expression, but Shi Qingxuan could hear the annoyance in his tone.

“Alright, Ge. Have a good night.”

“You, too.”

Shi Qingxuan had no idea how he finally managed to fall asleep. The constant movement of the ground beneath him, however faint, kept him awake for long after he’d lain down. But he must have fallen asleep at some point because the next thing he knew was that he was being startled awake by a sudden lurching motion that seemed to run though the entire ship. The wood around him creaked and groaned as if under immense strain. Shi Qingxuan stumbled out of his bed and straight onto the floor. Before he could reach for his cane, the ship jolted again and Shi Qingxuan was thrown across the ground. His back hit the cabin door with a painful thud and the air got sucked out of his lungs. He didn’t even try going for his cane again. Instead, he pulled himself up and somehow managed to open the door to fall into the corridor behind. Water immediately sloshed into his face. The steps leading to the deck were dripping water into the inside of the hull. From upstairs came the panicked voices and the noise of thunder. Horror gripped Shi Qingxuan. They were sinking. The ship was sinking. He should return to his cabin immediately as his brother had told him before, but…brother!

Shi Qingxuan tried to stand, but his leg refused to carry his weight. And so he robbed forwards, slowly but steadily making his way towards the stairs and dragging himself up. As soon as he emerged on deck, he was drenched. He didn’t know if it was ocean water or rain since both seemed to assault the ship in equal measure.

“GE!” Shi Qingxuan called as loudly as he could. “GE!!”

But his voice was immediately swallowed by the thundering water all around. This couldn’t be happening. Just once he decided to venture out onto the sea, and immediately calamity struck. Was this his fault? Had his selfishness incurred the wrath of a water demon? Shi Qingxuan continued his arduous crawl across the deck. There were people running everywhere, panicked and trying to keep control over the ship. No one paid Shi Qingxuan any attention, and he couldn’t spot his brother’s blue cape anywhere. A wave crashed into the side of the ship and tipped it precariously. Shi Qingxuan slipped across the water-slick deck and towards the railing, that suddenly looked a lot lower than he remembered. He closed his eyes and prepared for the impact, but a hand closed around his arm and held him back.

“Qingxuan! What are you doing here?!” his brother yelled over the storm around them. “Why aren’t you under deck?”

“Ge!” Shi Qingxuan clutched at his brother’s robes, “Ge, I was so worried, I thought you–“

“I’m fine!” Shi Wudu squeezed him in a brief hug. “But it’s dangerous out here, you should–“

Another wave assaulted the already tilted boat. The screams of men getting swallowed by the black waters echoed through the air. Shi Qingxuan felt the hand around him loosen.

“Qingxuan! Qingxuan!!“

Why are you screaming like that, Ge? Shi Qingxuan wanted to ask, but he didn’t seem to have enough air in his lungs. Shi Wudu sounded so desperate. But why?, Shi Qingxuan thought.

Then, Shi Qingxuan’s back collided with something hard and yet giving, and then he thought nothing at all.

-     -     -

He Xuan frowned. The water tasted like storm, and he could almost feel the vibrations of thunder against his gills. It had been a while since the last big thunderstorm, and He Xuan couldn’t say he was sad about that. That kind of heavy rain always echoed through the water like small explosions and made it impossible to tune them out. It was one of the very few instances where He Xuan rather spent his time above the surface. He considered out-swimming the storm, but the way the fishes behaved, it was going to be a big one, and he didn’t want to risk going too far, just in case…

So when the first drops of rain hit the surface, He Xuan broke through it and looked around. He was far away from any stretch of land and before him was only the vastness of the ocean. The sky was already dark – not that that was a problem for He Xuan’s sharp eyes. Somewhere on the horizon, a black shape stood against the sky. It looked like a large ship that was already getting tossed around by the steadily rising waves. He Xuan frowned. What did he care about ships? The last time he had gotten too close to one, well…

Well.

He tentatively moved towards the vessel. A strange feeling started to flicker in his chest, like a match being struck. It was an unfamiliar warmness, almost gentle. The closer He Xuan came to the ship, the warmer it got, until it burned like a little fire.

A sudden, horrible thought took hold of him. He moved faster, dipped his head underwater so there was less resistance. The small fire in his chest turned into a stream of lava that slowly flooded his veins, but he ignored it. When he saw the hull of the ship before him in the water, he surfaced and had his worst suspicions confirmed. The symbol on the sails was the same one he’d seen in Shi Wudu’s office all those weeks ago.

“Shi Qingxuan!” he yelled futilely, his voice too weak to brave the storm. He heard agitated yelling from the ship as a large wave suddenly barrelled against the large wooden vessel, tilting it to the side. He Xuan knew the cruelty of the black water, and he knew that it didn’t stop after one try. The second wave almost flipped the ship to its side, were it not for another wave rising in resistance on the other side. But it was still enough to send small shapes flying over the ship’s railing and into the unforgiving waters below. He Xuan plunged downwards again, frantically looking at the sinking bodies all around. They all looked unfamiliar, some unlucky sailors that were sacrificed for some stupid cause. But then a flash of something familiar caught He Xuan’s eye. With one swift motion of his tail he reached the descending figure of a man in flowing robes. His face was obscured by a swirling curtain of long hair, but He Xuan would recognise him anywhere.

“Shi–“ His voice died in his throat as he moved towards his friend. The burning in his chest became unbearable, spreading through his whole body and setting it on fire. He didn’t care. He felt his tail growing heavy and useless, but still he forced it to obey. When he finally reached Shi Qingxuan, He Xuan didn’t know how he hadn’t succumbed to the pain already. But he hadn’t, and that was enough. He wrapped Shi Qingxuan into his arms and swam towards the surface as quickly as he could. It wasn’t fast enough. He could feel Shi Qingxuan’s weight against him, slack and unmoving, and panic almost eclipsed the searing pain. He Xuan pressed his mouth to Shi Qingxuan’s, hoping the filtered oxygen from his lungs wouldn’t burn the other. He still moved upwards steadily, despite the heaviness that threatened to pull them both down. After an agonisingly long amount of time, they finally broke through the surface. There was debris strewn all across the water, and He Xuan dragged them over to a large piece of wood. The storm seemed to have subsided at least a bit, and the ship had regained its posture some way away. But He Xuan didn’t care about all that. He draped Shi Qingxuan onto the wooden board as gently as he could and nudged his side to startle him back into consciousness. He didn’t find the strength to use his voice.

-    -     -

When Shi Qingxuan opened his eyes again, he was disoriented. He didn’t know where he was, why everything felt so heavy, or why his lungs burned like they were on fire. A sudden coughing fit gripped him and he wanted to double over, but he found himself lying flatly against a rough piece of wood. He looked around in confusion, but his sight was blurry and everything around him was so dark. Then he heard it – a strange noise from right next to him, almost a laugh but not quite. It sounded so faint that Shi Qingxuan first thought he imagined it. He forced his eyes to focus and slowly, very slowly, the world around him took shape again. He was on the ocean, that was the first thing he realised. The second thing was that there was someone with him, and that someone was –

“He-xiong…” Shi Qingxuan pressed out, his throat sore and his voice hoarse, but he needed to say it. Needed to call out to the person he never thought he’d call again. “He-xiong, it’s you…”

He Xuan nodded, a barely noticeable motion of his head. His golden eyes looked dim, as if something had extinguished the light behind them.

“Sh…Shi Qi-“ he started, but something stopped him. He looked like he wanted to cough but couldn’t muster the energy to do so. Dread filled Shi Qingxuan.

“He-xiong, why…what…what happened to you?” He scrambled for purchase on the wooden slab and pushed himself up to look more closely at He Xuan. His skin was so pale it was almost translucent, and even his lips were deathly white. His head was slumped down and his arms lay heavily against the makeshift raft. “He-xiong…?”

He Xuan lifted his head and it looked like it took up all his energy. He opened his mouth, but no tone came out. Shi Qingxuan instinctively leaned in, bringing his face so close to He Xuan’s that their noses were almost touching. “Please, what’s wrong? Can…can I help you? There must be something…anything…?”

“I – br…oke…” He Xuan’s voice sounded raw and bloody, like it had to work past several barriers in his throat. His breath was searing hot against Shi Qingxuan’s skin. “th…ish…broke the w-wish,” he finally managed to get out, and his shoulders shook with silent coughs. “It…kills…”

“No!” Shi Qingxuan cried out and clutched He Xuan’s shoulders. They were so unnaturally hot that he almost flinched back, but he ignored the instinct and only gripped them tighter. “No, He-xiong, you can’t…I’m leaving, I’ll leave, and then it’ll be better again! Don’t talk to me, please, go away, you can’t…”

The corners of He Xuan’s mouth curled up ever so slightly, and he faintly shook his head. “Qi…Qingxuan…you…caught me…” he said, and his eyes wandered to Shi Qingxuan’s hands that gripped his shoulders. “Three…wishes…p- please…s- safety…get yourself to…to safety.”

Shi Qingxuan stared at him, watched He Xuan’s face slowly blur behind the tears that now spilled out of his eyes. The words echoed back through his head. Merfolk are sought after for their unique ability…whoever catches them is granted three wishes. Three wishes. Shi Qingxuan frantically searched for the right words, but they were lost amidst the panic in his mind, and so he let go of reason and just said what he wanted most in the world.

“I wish that you come back to me! Please, don’t leave me alone again! Please, somehow, find a way…come back to me! I…I…please, He-xiong, won’t you be a part of my life?” Shi Qingxuan sobbed, salty tears mingling with the salty ocean water. Then he realised just what he had wished for. What a terrible, terrible thing he’d done to He Xuan. Again. He wiped at his tears and shook his head. “No…No, forget that! I take it back!! He Xuan, I wish for you to be happy, to finally live like you want to! Nothing more! I want you to return to a happy life, and I want you to be able to do whatever you want to! That is my only wish!”

He Xuan stared at him, golden eyes meeting blue ones, and his mouth opened on words that never escaped. The last bit of light behind those warm, golden eyes flickered and died down, and He Xuan’s shoulders became slack in Shi Qingxuan’s hands.

“He-xiong? He-xiong!”

Shi Qingxuan’s fingers tightened, digging deep into He Xuan’s now rapidly cooling skin, but it wasn’t enough. He couldn’t muster enough strength to maintain his grip, and He Xuan’s shoulders slipped out of his hands.

Shi Qingxuan watched the body of the person that was most important to him in the world dip beneath the waves and get swallowed by the black water.

Chapter Text

Shi Qingxuan didn’t remember much of his rescue. It must have happened, because suddenly he found himself getting pulled out of the liquid grave and onto the rough wood of a ship’s deck. Arms immediately circled around him and someone sobbed into his shoulder (retrospectively, Shi Qingxuan thought he might have been in a delirium – his brother never cried, after all). That person shook him gently, murmuring soft words that sounded like regret, but Shi Qingxuan had no recollection of them.  All he felt was a coldness that seemed to have settled deep in the marrow of his bones, and all he heard was the empty sloshing of waves against wood. 

His awareness slowly returned to him when he was carried off the ship and onto dry land again. The further he got away from the water, from the sound of the waves, from the burial where he had been the only witness, the more of himself he felt coming back. Not that it was any improvement. With the awareness came the guilt, the sudden realisation that there was no denying that everything was his fault, that if only he had stayed away, none of this would have happened. And with the guilt came the pain, white-hot and all encompassing. Shi Qingxuan embraced it, took it into his heart and kept it there in hopes that it might consume him.

“I’m sorry.”

Shi Qingxuan’s head snapped up. They were in his room, where Shi Wudu had set him down on his bed.

“I’m sorry,” he said again, as if that could change anything. As if Shi Qingxuan hadn’t said those words a thousand times himself, with no avail. There was no point in being sorry for a past that couldn’t be changed.

“I shouldn’t have…I should have protected you better. We should have waited until your leg–“

“He saved me.”

“What?”

Shi Qingxuan looked up and it felt like all the anger and the regret and the hurt of the past months melted together inside of him. He stood on shaky legs, but he refused to pick up his cane.

“I would have died. I should have died! But He Xuan…” his voice cracked and his eyes burned, but Shi Qingxuan continued. “He Xuan saved me and then he died because of you! Because again you took my life and bent it into the direction that fitted you best! Because you used your last wish and instead of helping me, or…or helping anyone, you took it to…to what? Prove that you’re the only one who has the right to make decisions for me?”

Shi Wudu stared at him and Shi Qingxuan had never seen him look this shocked.

“Qingxuan…I didn’t–“

“Yes! Yes, you did! But I’m done. I’m not going to stay here any longer and live in a way I hate.”

“What are you saying?”

“I’m leaving the palace. I’ll find my own place.”

“You can’t–“

“I should be dead,” Shi Qingxuan repeated, and he slowly felt the anger subsiding, making him feel numb, as if anger had been all He Xuan had left him. “You can just pretend I drowned during that storm.”

“But you didn’t, Shi Qingxuan. You’re still here! Don’t throw your life away like this.”

“I’m not throwing away anything. I’m just taking it back. Don’t make me stay brother. Please. Just…just let me make one decision on my own.”

Shi Wudu stared at him and if Shi Qingxuan didn’t know better, he could have sworn he saw a liquid glint in his brother’s eyes.

-

He took off two days later. It was a clear day, the sky a spotless blue and the sun an unobscured bright orb. He Xuan would have complained about the dry air and the way the sun heated up his black hair, and Shi Qingxuan would have laughed.

He walked down the stairs of the palace with a bundle strapped to his back that contained some simple robes. When he took the last step out of the palace grounds, it felt light a weight was being lifted off his shoulders. You’re finally making your own decisions, He Xuan would have said, and Shi Qingxuan would have ducked his head and muttered something unintelligible.

He walked through the town that was bustling with people at this time of day, with merchants praising their wares and children weaving through the crowd to buy some sweets. He Xuan would have asked him if he had gotten some more mantou, and Shi Qingxuan would pretend he had forgotten, before laughing and throwing one to He Xuan.

When Xie Lian’s hut came into view, Shi Qingxuan paused briefly. He hadn’t told his friend of the events yet, and he had to prepare himself for the upcoming talk. He Xuan would have scoffed at his hesitation and told him to just get it on with. And so Shi Qingxuan took a deep breath, and knocked at Xie Lian’s door. When it opened, he was greeted with a sight of bright red robes.

“Oh, hello, Hua Cheng,” Shi Qingxuan smiled at the dragon, the expression feeling out of place on his face. Hua Cheng looked down at him and there was something strange in his eyes that almost looked like pity.

“Hello, young master Qingxuan,” he said and then called over his shoulder; “Gege, a visitor for you.”

There was some clattering from inside the hut and soon after Xie Lian emerged, his hands and face covered in flour. Hua Cheng gaped at him for a moment, before chuckling softly and brushing some of the flour off Xie Lian’s cheeks with gentle hands. Something inside of Shi Qingxuan’s chest constricted painfully.

“It’s okay, San Lang, I’m going to get dirty again anyway, and – Shi Qingxuan!” As soon as Xie Lian spotted his friend, he jumped forwards and pulled him into a tight hug.

 “Oh, Shi Qingxuan!” Judging from the way Xie Lian’s voice wavered he already knew, and Shi Qingxuan was more than grateful for that. Hua Cheng, for once, didn’t say anything, he just stood to the side and looked as Shi Qingxuan clutched at Xie Lian’s robes and wept into his shoulder. Shi Qingxuan didn’t even know there were still tears he hadn’t spent yet.

“He’s gone,” he managed to get out between the sobs, “He’s gone and it’s my fault.”

“It’s not.” Hua Cheng said simply, and Shi Qingxuan stared at him over Xie Lian’s shoulder. “It was his own decision, was it not? To go against the wish? It’s not like you forced him to.”

“But I did!” Shi Qingxuan cried and disentangled himself from Xie Lian’s embrace. “If I hadn’t gone looking for him, then he wouldn’t have–“

“ And if you hadn’t found him in your brother’s office, he’d still be in there. Actions have consequences. Some good, some bad.  You never know what it’s going to be. You didn’t kill him. And I’m sure he was more than happy to save you in exchange for something as meagre as his life.” Hua Cheng stepped up to them and laid an arm around Xie Lian’s shoulder, pulling him in. “I know I would be.”

Xie Lian looked up at him with wide eyes, but Hua Cheng kept staring at Shi Qingxuan. “You can repay him by living well. That’s all the damned sea snake wanted.”

“San Lang…” Xie Lian said quietly and buried his face in Hua Cheng’s robes. Hua Cheng turned slightly so that his lips almost-but-not-quite touched Xie Lian’s hair. Somehow Shi Qingxuan felt like he was intruding into something intimate and averted his eyes. The image of the two stung in his heart, even though he wanted Xie Lian to be happy.

“Shi Qingxuan, why are you carrying so much stuff around?” Xie Lian eventually asked, still tugged firmly against Hua Cheng’s side. Shi Qingxuan looked up and smiled at them.

“I’m moving out,” he said. “I’m living my own life now.”

Hua Cheng nodded, but Xie Lian looked surprised. “Really? Where will you live? Do you want to stay here? We have enough room, there is-“

“No, no, no, don’t worry, Your Highness! I wouldn’t want to impose on you two!” Shi Qingxuan quickly interrupted before Hua Cheng’s expression had a chance to get even more murderous. “My brother insisted on getting me a place to live in, so I have a small hut down the road, next to the water. We’re almost neighbours now, Your Highness!”

Xie Lian looked relieved and smiled brightly at Shi Qingxuan. “That is great! I’m happy for you…well, I mean, I’m not for…for…but…” he trailed off and looked to Hua Cheng for help.

Shi Qingxuan chuckled. “It’s alright, Your Highness. I understand. Well, I better head over there now and unpack my things!”

“Do you need help? We can lend you a hand!” Xie Lian offered, but Shi Qingxuan shook his head as he picked up his bag and his cane.

“No need, Your Highness and Hua Cheng. I’ll manage. But…there is something else you two could do for me,” he added slowly and gave them a stern look. “You have the chance to be happy together. Please take it. Don’t hesitate any longer.”

Shi Qingxuan would have never thought he’d see Hua Cheng speechless one day, but a lot had changed. The two looked at each other and Shi Qingxuan turned around to continue on his way.

It was a lonely path, but it was his own, and that was enough.

-

Days turned to weeks and weeks turned to months as Shi Qingxuan slowly got used to his new life. The hut was small with only two rooms; one he used as a bedroom and the other functioned as a kitchen and living space. At first it had been strange, to wake up without anyone immediately attending to him and telling him his schedule for the day. He had to do everything himself, and sometimes he needed two days for a simple task simply because his leg would grow tired. But he quickly grew accustomed to living at his own pace and he realised that he hadn’t felt as content in a long time. He had everything he needed – when he was hungry, he went into town to buy food, when his clothes were dirty, he washed them in a small pond next to his house. There was only one thing that was missing, but Shi Qingxuan tried not to think about it too much. Maybe then he could pretend the large hole in his heart didn’t actually exist. It was worst when night approached, and the noises of the day got drowned out by the falling darkness. Then, the waves lapping against the shore were the only sounds Shi Qingxuan heard, and sometimes that made him so sad that he couldn’t breathe. He often sat outside at the beach, staring into the water and hoping someone would look back at him.

When the loneliness grew a bit too prominent, he visited Xie Lian and Hua Cheng. They were still moving slowly, but sometimes Shi Qingxuan caught Hua Cheng pressing a kiss to Xie Lian’s forehead, or Xie Lian leaning his head on Hua Cheng’s shoulder when they sat next to each other. After three months, Shi Qingxuan visited his brother for the first time. It was a short visit, just to let him know that everything was alright, but it felt good to see him again. Shi Wudu hadn’t changed a lot, he was still stern and diligent, but there was a softness in his eyes when he talked to Shi Qingxuan, and when Shi Qingxuan left, he briefly squeezed his shoulder.

It was a good life, Shi Qingxuan thought. He was content. He could continue like this. After a year, he almost believed himself.

It was a rainy day when Shi Qingxuan went into town to buy some vegetables. He had exhausted his supply the day before, where he tried and failed twice to replicate a dish he remembered from the palace. He started to understand why Xie Lian had trouble cooking sometimes. Or, well, all the time. Shi Qingxuan could make some more complex dishes now, but it always involved a lot of trial and error.

He was well-known among the merchants of the town now as “the young master who learned to live properly”, and they always greeted him with kindness and enthusiasm. Shi Qingxuan had always found the common people to be a lot easier to be with than the stuffy businessmen and nobles that regularly visited the palace.

“Oh, back so soon? Not that I don’t appreciate the patronage, haha,” the vegetable vendor said with his loud voice and handed Shi Qingxuan his filled basket.

“The dish has gotten the better of me, but I’ll make sure to best it today,” Shi Qingxuan replied, and the merchant laughed heartily.

“Make sure to tell me how it went!”

Shi Qingxuan just smiled and waved his goodbyes. When he passed the local tea house, he decided to drop in for a cup of tea and some rest for his leg – spending the whole day hobbling around had taken its toll on it. The tea house was quite crowded already, and Shi Qingxuan enjoyed the lively conversations and happy atmosphere. He sat down at a table on his own and ordered his favourite tea before turning his attention to the latest gossip. Listening in on other’s conversations had become one of his favourite past time activities, mostly because their lives were often much more eventful than his own. He looked around for the boy he’d seen the last three times, who always told his friend about the latest progress in his search for a proper partner. Unfortunately, he didn’t seem to be around, and Shi Qingxuan hoped he hadn’t missed anything significant of his story. 

“–seen the young man who has arrived yesterday? His looks are very agreeable.”

Shi Qingxuan turned around to the two women a few tables away from his, who had started chuckling behind their hands.

“Forget it, Wan Mei, he is out of your league! Did you see his robes? He’s definitely a noble. Who knows, maybe he has lost his way en route to the palace.”

“I would love to show him the way then,” Wan Mei giggled and her friend slapped her arm. Shi Qingxuan smiled to himself. So there was a new noble in town, huh? Maybe he was looking for property and soon another lavish mansion would adorn the city’s streets. He made a mental note to keep his eyes and ears open for any developments on that story.  

When his leg felt like it was willing to work with him again instead of against him, Shi Qingxuan paid for his tea and started the journey back home. It took him a while with the heavy basket to carry, but he managed to make his way there before sunset. The ocean behind his hut greeted him with the sound of waves that Shi Qingxuan now found soothing rather than melancholic. The orange sun turned the calm water into liquid lava and Shi Qingxuan once again thought how lucky he was to have found such a beautiful place. He placed the basket with vegetables onto his doorstep and decided to sit down at the beach to watch the sun drown beneath the waves.

When he turned toward the shore, he saw that someone was already sitting there. It was strange, considering Shi Qingxuan had never gotten any visitors besides Xie Lian, and this person seemed way too tall to be Xie Lian. Well, it was not like the beach belonged to him alone, and company was always welcome. Shi Qingxuan put on a smile and limped towards this unfamiliar visitor.

“Hello, friend!” he called out from some distance away as to not startle the man who seemed to be lost in thought. Except he did startle, even though Shi Qingxuan had spoken as friendly as he could. His shoulders tensed up and Shi Qingxuan watched him get stiffly to his feet. He was tall, with long, flowing black hair and dark robes that had intricate golden patterns on them. Shi Qingxuan wanted to gasp, but his mouth was dry and his lungs devoid of air. He was rooted in place, staring at the dark form silhouetted in front of the glowing ocean.

The man slowly turned and a gentle breeze picked up, tugging at his robes and the long strands of silken hair. Golden eyes reflected the light of the sun, widening when they settled on Shi Qingxuan. The man’s shoulders slumped and his expression turned soft. Shi Qingxuan’s breath hitched in his throat and his eyes started to burn. He took a step forward, and then another, and another, half running and half limping towards the man. His leg ached and protested, but he didn’t pay it any mind – it could fall off for are he cared. His foot caught at a stone and he stumbled forwards, but two arms circled around him before he could fall. He buried his face in those dark robes that smelled like ocean and wind and He Xuan and he cried without restraint, clutching the fabric as tight as he could to make sure it was real.

“Still stumbling around, I see,” a low and gentle voice said and the familiarity of it made Shi Qingxuan cry even harder. He Xuan’s arms around him tightened, like he was afraid Shi Qingxuan would vanish if he didn’t hold him close enough. As if Shi Qingxuan had any intention of ever moving again.

“You’re back. You came back,” Shi Qingxuan voice was muffled by the robes, but he refused to draw back.

“Of course I did. That was your wish, wasn’t it?”

Shi Qingxuan froze. But he hadn’t…

He slowly disentangled himself from He Xuan and looked up at him, at those warm golden eyes and the unusually soft smile.

“But I didn’t…I mean, I wished that–“

“That I returned to be able to do whatever I want to do,” He Xuan finished. “So that’s what I’m doing.”

Shi Qingxuan stared at him and it felt like his heart was going to burst. “He-xiong…”

One of He Xuan’s hands came up to gently cup Shi Qingxuan’s face. “Could you…say that again?” he asked quietly, his eyes wandering down to Shi Qingxuan’s mouth as if he wanted to see it form the words. Shi Qingxuan swallowed, suddenly feeling very warm.

“He-xio–”

He Xuan bent down and covered Shi Qingxuan’s lips with his own, swallowing the word before it escaped. The arm around Shi Qingxuan’s waist tightened as He Xuan pressed him closer and angled his head so it would give him better access to Shi Qingxuan’s mouth. But the kiss remained soft, more a question than a demand, as if He Xuan tried his best to restrain himself. Shi Qingxuan wouldn’t have any of it. His arms came up almost automatically, wrapping around He Xuan’s neck as he parted his lips to give He Xuan a silent permission. That was all the encouragement He Xuan needed, and he deepened the kiss in a way that took Shi Qingxuan’s breath away and made his already weak legs grow even weaker until eventually, He Xuan’s arms were everything that kept him standing.

When He Xuan pulled away, they both panted heavily.

“Oh,” said Shi Qingxuan, who had been told about kissing before, but wouldn’t have imagined it to be so…well. Whatever that amazing thing was he had just been a part of.

“I would never have expected breathing air to be so bothersome,” He Xuan muttered and then gazed at Shi Qingxuan, with golden eyes that were a shade darker than usual. “It’s entirely worth it, though.”

The noise Shi Qingxuan made would have been embarrassing, were he not so utterly indifferent towards everything that wasn’t He Xuan’s voice, He Xuan’s eyes, and He Xuan’s mere presence.

“H-how are you here? How…” Shi Qingxuan looked down and gestured with the hand he didn’t use to cling to his human support.

“How do I have legs? Honestly, I don’t know. I woke up on a beach I’ve never been to before, and that’s it.”

“What do you mean that’s it?”

“Well, it’s not like my powers ever explained themselves to me. They just…were. It’s like trying to explain how your organs work. It’s enough to know they do, no need to know how.”

Shi Qingxuan could have said that there were people who were very aware of how organs worked, but he didn’t really care. His He-xiong had returned to him, and that was all that mattered.

“What I’d like to know,” He Xuan said and suddenly Shi Qingxuan lost contact with the ground. He gasped in surprise when He Xuan lifted him up into his arms and started walking to his hut, “is why you haven’t invited me into your new abode yet.”

Shi Qingxuan grinned happily and nuzzled his head into the crook of He Xuan’s neck, breathing in the scent of the ocean. “You don’t need an invitation, He-xiong. You belong here already.”

He Xuan’s steps stuttered and he almost dropped Shi Qingxuan.

“Oh? Do you still need to get used to your legs? We can practice together!”

He Xuan muttered something about That not the problem here and opened the door to the hut.

“Comfy.” He said flatly as he took in the very messy kitchen area.

“AH!” Shi Qingxuan yelped and squirmed out of He Xuan’s arms. He stumbled when his legs hit the ground, but it didn’t matter because at least it allowed him to obscure He Xuan’s view of the cluttered floor. “I would have tidied up if I’d known you’d come!”

He Xuan snorted, and the sound was so unfamiliar that Shi Qingxuan forgot about the embarrassing state of his home. “If you’d known I had magically reincarnated as a human you mean? No, I mean it. It’s comfortable. … how do you say? Homely.”

Shi Qingxuan looked down to hide the bright redness of his face. “H-how long have you been back?”

“About half a year, I think…it took quite a long time to find you. And…well…getting used to these boring-looking things,” He Xuan patted his leg begrudgingly.

“Ah, He-xiong, I still think you look beautiful, even without your tail!” Shi Qingxuan said and, as if to underline his point, ran his fingers through the soft strands of He Xuan’s hair.

He Xuan stared at him, then looked away, cleared his throat, and stared at him again. “Can I kiss you?”

“He-xiong, there is literally nothing I’d like you to do more.”

He Xuan’s white cheeks took on a faint shade of pink as he leaned in to claim Shi Qingxuan’s lips in another kiss.

And there in the small hut at the beach, in He Xuan’s arms, Shi Qingxuan had finally, finally found his own place in the world.

-     Epilogue    -

Shi Qingxuan could basically feel the incredulous looks from the people around them. The usually so loud and lively inn was uncharacteristically quiet and only a few murmured words could be heard here and there.

He Xuan was undeterred.

The table before them was piled high with every single dish the kitchen had to offer and He Xuan took great care to get a taste of each one.

“Is that young master eating those things all by himself?” Shi Qingxuan heard a young woman ask her friend. “Look at how slim he is. Where does he put all that?”

“I have no idea,” her friend replied and snickered. “But I wouldn’t mind spending a day in the kitchen for him.”

Shi Qingxuan grinned so widely it almost hurt. He looked at He Xuan and thought that no one had any right to look attractive while eating. He Xuan glanced up and cocked an eyebrow when he caught Shi Qingxuan staring.

“What’s the matter?” he asked, the chopsticks that carried a piece of steamed fish hovering halfway between the bowl and his mouth.

“Oh, nothing,” Shi Qingxuan said sweetly. “I was just wondering if the fish was any good.”

He Xuan shrugged and held his chopsticks out. “Try it then.”

Shi Qingxuan leaned forward and took the piece of fish from the chopsticks, humming appreciatively when the salty taste hit his tongue. “It’s good!” he said and threw the chattering women a quick glance. Their eyes widened and they whispered and giggled behind their hands. He Xuan followed Shi Qingxuan’s gaze with his trademark frown, and the giggling intensified.

“What –“

“He-xiong! We have to visit His Highness and Hua Cheng after this,” Shi Qingxuan said merrily as he dug through his pouch for some money.

He Xuan rolled his eyes. “I can imagine at least ten things I’d rather do than watch that damned sky-snake pine after his human.”

“They’re no longer pining, He-xiong.”

“That’s worse.”

“Please, He-xiong…for me?” Shi Qingxuan asked innocently and fluttered his lashes.

He Xuan pointed his finger indignantly at Shi Qingxuan. “You! …whatever. It’s not like I have anything better to do.”

“I think they’re not home,” Shi Qingxuan said after knocking against the wooden door for the third time.

“Oh, they definitely are,” He Xuan growled and eyed the path that led behind Xie Lian’s hut. “I can feel that sky snake lounging around over there.”

“You can still feel mythical creatures then?”

He Xuan shrugged. “Apparently. Hey, don’t ask me how all this works.”

“Hmm…” Shi Qingxuan hummed as they slowly made their way around the hut. “Does that mean you can still fulfil wishes? We have to try –”

The view that presented itself to them when the small backyard came into sight stunned Shi Qingxuan into silence. There, behind the tiny abode right next to the shore, was Xie Lian. And Xie Lian, in his stark white robes and with his bamboo hat sitting crooked on his head, was leaning against the snout of a gigantic red dragon. It was so long that it had to curl in on itself multiple times to fit into the space. The red scales were here and there patched with gold and two sleek, black whiskers twitched in the wind, one of which Xie Lian stroked idly. The long tail swung lazily around and missed the roof of the hut by only a hair’s breadth.

“I see I am still not granted some peace and quiet in this life,” Hua Cheng said, his voice a low growl that still managed to sound annoyed, and his eye wandered over to their guests. Xie Lian looked up and his entire face lit up when he saw Shi Qingxuan and his companion approach. Shi Qingxuan was sure that he would have jumped up and hugged him, had Hua Cheng’s whisker not wound around his waist to keep him in place. As it were, he simply freed one arm out of the other’s strange embrace and waved.

“Shi Qingxuan! He Xuan!”

Shi Qingxuan heard He Xuan mutter something that sounded suspiciously like “Damn pretentious snake”, while his hand almost unnoticeably came to rest on Shi Qingxuan’s hip. Shi Qingxuan averted his eyes from the landmark that was Hua Cheng to grin at He Xuan.

“His scales are almost as pretty as yours were.”

Hua Cheng let out a huffed breath that ruffled Xie Lian’s hair. “You’re human now, huh? How nice.”

“I’m so happy for you two!” Xie Lian smiled while he tried and failed to free himself from Hua Cheng’s grasp. “Ah, San Lang, let me greet our friends!”

Hua Cheng made something that might have been a smirk, and that exposed two rows of sharp teeth. His whisker tightened around Xie Lian and lifted him up to his feet. “Gege’s wish is my command.”

Xie Lian patted his snout before running over to Shi Qingxuan to pull him into a tight hug. “Shi Qingxuan, I’m so glad it all worked out! I told you so, didn’t I?”

Warmth spread through Shi Qingxuan’s chest and he returned the hug with equal enthusiasm. “Your Highness was right. Thank you so much.”

When Xie Lian pulled back, his eyes wandered over to He Xuan. “I’m glad you’re back. Shi Qingxuan was so desperate without you.”

Shi Qingxuan would have been embarrassed, were it not the absolute truth.

“Looks like we both got everything we wanted, and a lot more than we deserved,” Hua Cheng rumbled at He Xuan and snaked forwards to gently nuzzle Xie Lian.

Shi Qingxuan gave He Xuan a questioning look, unsure of what Hua Cheng was referring to, but to his great surprise, He Xuan nodded.

“Yes. That we did.”

“Look at how well they get along, Your Highness,” Shi Qingxuan grinned and nudged Xie Lian’s side with his shoulder. Hua Cheng’s single eye glared at him and Shi Qingxuan was eternally grateful that He Xuan’s back was broad enough to hide him. A sudden gust of hot, foggy wind picked up and enveloped the large red dragon form, obscuring it from view. He Xuan wrapped his arm protectively around Shi Qingxuan and shielded him from the current. When the dust settled, the dragon had vanished, and in its place stood a slightly ruffled red-clad man. Xie Lian shook his head and skipped over to him, poking his finger against Hua Cheng’s chest.

“San Lang, I told you to not transform in our backyard! Look at this mess!” he gestured around at the branches, stones, and small knick-knacks that Hua Cheng’s transformation had scattered all around. Hua Cheng smiled down at Xie Lian and looked almost apologetic.

“I’m sorry, Gege, I’ll make sure to clean it all up.” He bent down and kissed Xie Lian’s forehead, then his nose, then the corner of his mouth. “Please accept this humble dragon’s apology.”

“Humble,” He Xuan scoffed and then Shi Qingxuen felt the other’s breath warm against his ear as he whispered, “The snake just wanted to show off, so arrogant.”

Shi Qingxuan chuckled and turned his head so that He Xuan’s lips touched his cheek. “I still think merfolk are more impressive.”

He felt He Xuan smile against his skin. “Of course they are. That’s out of the question.”

“Well,” came a long drawl from Hua Chang. “Not that I don’t enjoy this blessed reunion, but Gege and I have some things to do, and from the look of it, you two do as well.”

He Xuan spluttered and Xie Lian turned beet-red. Shi Qingxuan shrugged.

“Of course, we’ll leave first then. You two have to visit next time!”

“Young master Qingxuan is so reasonable,” Hua Cheng grinned and bowed mockingly. Shi Qingxuan waved and pulled a slightly indignant He Xuan after him.

“Why are you listening to the sky snake’s demands?”

“Oh, I’m not. I’m listening to my own demands. He-xiong, my first wish is for you to take me home. My second wish is that you kiss me senseless when we’re there. And my third wish is that you never leave me again.”

For a moment, He Xuan was quiet, and Shi Qingxuan felt his face heating up. That had probably been a bit too much. Then He Xuan’s arm curled around his back and the other hooked under his legs, lifting him off his feet.

“Looks like I’m still able to fulfil wishes after all.” He Xuan said and pressed his lips to Shi Qingxuan’s in a brief kiss.

Shi Qingxuan laughed and wrapped his arms around He Xuan’s neck, wondering how he managed to land this catch.