Chapter Text
To protect his eyes from the idiots constantly flashing before him, Sherlock once packed up all the stuff he needed, took as much money as he could fit in his bag and pockets, and went far away from his home.
If it were possible, Holmes would not have taken the glittering heavy coins, because for him it seemed to be an unnecessary trifle, for which the great lords would have cut each other’s throats. In addition, chests in the dungeons of his castle were full with these “trifles”, and Sherlock often played with the gold coins as a child, building different structures with them, which always evoked an adorable expression on his mother’s face.
Since then, the money has remained a toy in Holmes' eyes, but it has been valuable to other people and even to dragons.
So Sherlock showed up to the cave of one such monster and politely started to knock on the stone, while shouting loudly: “Get your ass out, I need to talk to you!” The dragon, being an ancient and wise being, did not like this treatment, to which it responded with a sharp exhalation of fire. It always scared off all the unwanted guests, of which there were few, not everyone would go after one of the most dangerous monsters, and the ones who did it were usually the different weirdos, who have something wrong with their head.
The dragon finally had to come out from its hideout, as the unknown troublemaker did not even think to stop and continued to summon the ancient creature.
In front of its surprised snout, a bag full of gold was carelessly thrown and someone ordered, that’s right, ordered, to guard His Highness from attacks on his serenity.
The coins shone in such an alluring way, and the offeror was so interesting that the dragon agreed and went after the prince.
It turns out this stranger really turned out to be a prince, even though the ancient being always believed that those with noble blood also had courtesy, but this was clearly not about Sherlock Holmes. He was rude, arrogant and terribly entitled, and this was easy to understand, because the guy kept going on and on about how his family, and others, are idiots, but especially his older brother, Mycroft, who was probably already making a fuss over the disappearance of his baby bro.
Yeah, the dragon’s name was Gregory, or simply Greg, but Sherlock chose to forget about that, and when they got to the tower, he just reminded it not to let anyone near him, and if anyone had the guts to fight the monster, it can chew that crazy man in half or throw him away. Holmes didn’t care as long as no one bothered him.
“Well, hello, pretty girl,” Sherlock said, when he climbed into the tower and saw the free space — a field for his actions and only for him.
Indeed, Mycroft made a fuss over his younger brother, and when he learned that he had somehow found himself in a tower, guarded by a fearful dragon, he issued a decree offering mountains of money and almost a manna for saving Sherlock Holmes, one of the heirs to the throne.
“They’re out there looking for you,” the dragon said by the tower. It was so huge, it was as big as the tip of the stone structure.
“Fools, they’re wasting their time,” Holmes responded, looking out the window. “You’re supposed to be guarding me, not sleeping here. I’m worried about my peace of mind.”
“A couple of guys came in today who wanted to set you free, but as soon as they saw me, they took off,” smoke came out of the creature’s nostrils, like out of an oven. “It’s enough for me to just lie here.”
“I hired you because I thought you were a dangerous monster, and you’re just a lazy animal!”
Holmes began to make noise in his tower, furiously rattling his possessions, which mostly had only scientific applications.
Greg has sometimes wondered, how can this little man live there without food or any other amenities? But Holmes was doing just fine, sometimes completely silent for days, torturing the violin and occasionally sneaking out to collect the samples he needed for experiments.
The dragon tried to wonder what exactly His Highness was doing, but His Highness would just say that Gregory was a “dumb animal”, and throw some jar at it when he was furious.
Should have eaten that arrogant man, but it was just a pipe dream, because Greg was a responsible dragon with a sense of honour. It wouldn’t eat the guy who paid it off. Besides, the ancient creature knew how to get revenge on the prince.
“O, prince charming, I have come to rescue you from the dragon’s clutches and return you to your kingdom.”
Sherlock literally got offended, when he heard those horrible words. He was sorting different types of soil without a care in the world, almost saying “My precious”, and then this happens. Well, the prince asked this lazy dragon with some name to guard him against such noblemen, but something must have gone wrong.
“Beat it!” Holmes screamed without even looking out of the tower. He had hope that the intruder would finally leave, as Sherlock politely asked him to, but to his utter displeasure, no one listened to him.
“I think the wind is playing tricks on my ears because my eyes see you need help.”
“I told you to go away! You don’t have to save me!” the prince finally looked out.
“So, the stories were true, you really are like a beautiful lady!”
“Get out, knight, I’m not your Fair Lady!”
“The dragon must have cast an evil spell on you that has disturbed your consciousness. But don’t worry, I will return you to your glorious parents, and the confusion will fade! I swear on my honour!”
“What a chosen idiot…”
And then this saviour, to the horror of Holmes, started, with his jangling armour, climbing up the tower.
“I’ll save you.”
“Good God, no.”
“Don’t worry.”
“I’m worried, you asshole, that you’re gonna ruin everything!”
“Almost there.”
“No!”
And Sherlock found a massive clay pot and threw it at the knight, but the shell flew past its target.
“What are you doing, Your Highness?”
“What do you think?” asked Holmes and he grabbed the next item for the light knight’s head.
“Your mind is really messed up, don’t do that!”
“Bye-bye!”
This time the shell found its place and successfully crashed, causing the knight to roll and fall to the ground.
“Tell my brother I’m not going back!”
“Unholy… Unholy.”
When the “savior” crawled in an unknown direction, the dragon appeared, somehow trembling strangely, and issued an incomprehensible cluck.
“You were supposed to protect me!”
The dragon started clucking even more.
“Hey!” Holmes was almost hanging from the window frame.
“I’m not your Fair Lady,” The dragon panted and fell helplessly to the ground, shaking and causing the earth to tremble around it.
A few seconds later, Sherlock, blushing, realised the creature was laughing.
That’s how they lived, the prince and the dragon.
Perhaps, the very first knight, who happened to have the misfortune to clash his head with the elegantly thrown at it pot of His Highness' own hands, has never conveyed Sherlock’s words to his brother: saving the prince is not necessary, he does not want to see boring court faces, and wants loneliness, stone walls and a pinch of mud from Wessex.
Holmes kept telling Greg that that was why he had left his lands and his castle with all its comforts and riches: no one understood him. If the prince tried to defend his point of view, to fight for his own wishes, he was simply ignored. To all, he was His Majesty Sherlock William Scott Holmes, not just Sherlock.
To the dragon, of course, the young prince did not say all this in plain language, all this meaning, which is indicated above, was collected by Greg carefully and painstakingly, because the whole essence was concealed behind poignant phrases with an impossible number of “sweet” words.
At some point, the dragon even felt sorry for this underestimated and foreign to others prince, but when the greeting of the guy began with “Hey, lazy animal” the creature was only more willing to mock the young lord.
Greg performed its duties almost perfectly, precisely “almost”. After all, it had to teach the rude Holmes a lesson, and the dragon itself was bored to lie on the ground and guard the tower in a theatrically warrior-like manner. So sometimes it would make a whole show for itself. What a spectacle it was when Sherlock, in a panic, would start to ward off his noble husbands, fearing that his peace would be disturbed.
The dragon looked with its slit-like eyes with melting gold in them at the “selected” warriors, who it would have let pass beyond itself. Yes, not everyone has been honored to come to the tower, because not everyone was able to entertain the ancient creature. One’s armour didn’t shine dashingly enough in the sun, the other’s hair didn’t dance mesmerizingly enough in the wind. Every little thing was important, and Greg noticed everything.
So it listened with special pleasure as one of the nobles sang a serenade for Holmes, and one even tried to lure the prince out with a beautiful patterned blade, while comparing it to the prince’s beauty.
What they didn’t know was that it didn’t take much to get Sherlock out of the tower. You could have just offered him that Welsh mud or a piece of an interesting plant. Greg could have sworn that this mad experiment-loving prince would run out of his hideout and almost jump on this fine man’s neck.
The dragon was surprised when one husband had done so, but had given the dragon a delicious berry tea with mint beforehand.