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Published:
2020-09-27
Completed:
2020-09-27
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2,935
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3/3
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Irreverent

Summary:

3 ways "Michael Needs to Get Married" could have and SHOULD have gone.

Chapter 1: One

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

“I hope to god you had nothing to do with this,” Diane hisses.

Michael looks at her in shock. “Of course not,” he says, “I have no idea how this happened.”

It’s true, because he doesn’t know how or where Chase rediscovered the forged passports Nelle had in her possession when she was arrested, just like he didn’t know Valentin gave them to her in the first place. It certainly makes his life a hell of a lot easier, though.

Naturally, when the passports were found, the charges against Nelle were refiled, and this time the evidence was held under more security than the crown jewels of England. When Nelle started telling anyone who would listen that it was a setup, that those couldn’t be real, Michael had rolled his eyes. Of course they weren’t real, they were as fake as the ones she had in the first place. Then Nelle had blurted that Valentin gave her the documents, she had sold him the ELQ shares and he gave her passports, but not THOSE passports, because he had taken them and destroyed them.

Well, one of those statements was interesting to law enforcement. Another thing that could be hung on Valentin? What a stroke of luck! But clearly he hadn’t taken the passports from the PCPD, as they were now in the hands of Detective Chase. The ELQ stock were found to now be in his name, and they were the stocks Nelle inherited from Shiloh, so that part was true. But Valentin denied it all, including stealing the documents after Nelle was arrested. Of course he would deny it, but it wasn’t hard to believe he had taken part in such a deal.

Nelle tried to bargain her testimony against Valentin for her freedom. No prosecutor would make that deal, not when Nelle was facing kidnapping and assault charges (finding the passports made the attack on Willow a lot more problematic and believable). Besides, that Valentin had the stocks was proof enough of a deal. It all worked out fabulously for Michael. He now knew who was trying to steamroll his company, and Nelle was back in prison and far, far, far away from his son. Nelle lied about planning to kidnap Wiley, it stood to reason she lied about how Brad got ahold of her son. The way Michael heard it, Nelle argued with her lawyer about going to trial. She would prove it was all lies, she was innocent. Her lawyer told her to take the damn plea deal, testify against Valentin and the prosecutor will allow you parole after ten years. It was generous, Nelle could be sentenced to a lot more than ten years. Kidnapping, attempted kidnapping, fraud, perjury—she was guilty of all of it. And she ended up being found guilty and sentenced to forty years. Valentin got away with a slap on the wrist, but ELQ was safe from his grasp.

It’s amazing that those passports suddenly made things fall into place. And Michael truly doesn’t know how they came to be found.

“The passports were clearly forged,” Michael had said while talking to his mom and dad. “Surely they could be forged again.”

But Michael Morgan Corinthos had nothing to do with that.

 

Notes:

Like...this was the obvious way to go. The passports were faked once, why couldn't they be faked again?

Chapter 2: Two

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

There are so many ways to kill a person and get away with it, not that Michael would know about that. One sees it on TV, reads about it in books, hears about “almost got away with it” cases in the news. You can kill a person a thousand different ways, but getting away with it? That’s something else entirely.

Diane calls him when it hits the news. “Do I want to know where you were last night?” She asks.

Michael is bouncing Wiley on his hip, trying to distract him from reaching for the diamond rings on the counter. “You might as well know, I was at home, celebrating getting married.”

“You what?” Diane asks.

“Yeah, we decided to go ahead with it anyway,” Michael says. He grins at Sasha, who smiles back. The jeweler slides a plastic band on Sasha’s finger, nodding at the fit. “We’re getting Sasha a ring now.”

“Now?! Michael, Nelle is dead!”

“We were already here when you called me,” Michael says. “I assure you I am just as shocked as you are.”

Diane sputters. “I find that hard to believe.”

The jeweler nods at Michael. “Your turn,” he says.

Sasha holds out her hands and Wiley goes to her easily. “Who’s on the phone?” She asks.

Michael switches the phone to his other hand and allows the jeweler to measure his ring finger. “Diane,” he says. “She’s just told me that uh…well, Nelle is dead.”

Sasha’s eyes widen. “She’s what?”

“Yeah,” Michael says. “I suppose there will have to be a funeral.”

“Michael are you listening to me?!” Diane shouts. “You’re going to be the first person they look at!”

“Why would they look at me?” Michael asks. “I was getting married, I had nothing to do with this. Look, come by the house if you want, we can talk there, I have to pay for our rings now.” He hangs up on her, and Diane will probably kill him for that, but it’s true, he had nothing to do with this.

Michael signs the receipt, the rings will be ready in about a week. He and Sasha have picked plain wedding bands, and Sasha picked a three-stone engagement ring, a diamond flanked by a ruby and a blue topaz stone—his and Wiley’s birthstones.

In the car, Sasha puts her hand on Michael’s knee. “Are you okay?”

Michael nods. “What’s most important is Wiley is safe, and we’re happy.” He takes her hand and raises it, placing a kiss on her knuckles. “You still want to marry me?”

“Of course!” Sasha says. “I want us to be a family—you, me, and Wiley.”

Michael grins, glancing at his son in the rearview mirror. Wiley is chewing on his fingers, he seems to have a tooth coming in. It’s amazing, watching how his son changes day by day, even minute by minute. This morning Wiley learned he could pull off his own socks and he’s been having an absolute ball with that. He’ll never miss another new discovery, because now he’ll never be parted from his son.

Michael is questioned by the police, but he has nothing to hide. All the Quartermaines had dinner to celebrate Michael’s marriage, and his new wife corroborates his story—he was in bed all night. He last saw Nelle that evening, when she saw him and Sasha coming out of the courthouse after picking up their marriage license. Nelle said some very nasty things, vowed that Sasha would not be her son’s mother, and stormed off.

Michael thinks Nelle probably didn’t mean to kill herself—because that’s what the coroner will eventually find, that it was suicide. No bruises, no signs of smothering, no marks where a needle could have been injected. Nelle was probably doing it for attention, she thought someone would find her before it could happen (because she called several people—Chase, Michael, even Valentin for some reason), and she could say that seeing Michael try to replace her in Wiley’s life lead to her wanting to end it all. Would it make her sympathetic? Maybe, it might also have made her look irrational.

But Nelle has never been a rational person. Her lawyer will probably argue for a deeper investigation (he won’t, because Valentin is paying him and Valentin is quite glad he has one less problem), but there’s nothing to find, because Michael had nothing to do with this. No one had anything to do with this, because it was all Nelle. It’s always been Nelle.

Michael isn’t completely heartless—Nelle doesn’t have family, but he won’t let her body go unclaimed. He’ll pay for her to be cremated and her ashes to be interred (his mother will tell him to chuck the urn off a bridge, Nelle doesn’t deserve to have Michael pay for the upkeep of a columbarium). Someday Wiley is going to ask questions about his mother, and Michael knows what it’s like to be lied to about a parent, he doesn’t want that for his son. And in this town, he can’t hope to keep Nelle’s life a secret, Wiley will know, probably sooner rather than later, that his mother’s name is Nelle. So this is for Wiley, so he’ll have a place to go to visit his mother as he grows up (if he wants to), so he’ll be able to see her name and leave flowers (again, if he wants to). Michael will tell him what he thinks is appropriate, but he won’t lie. The internet is a reality, as is the access children have to it, and Nelle’s crimes are all public record. Wiley will form his own opinion, and maybe one day Michael will have Nelle’s ashes removed and he’ll drop them in the ocean, but only after his son has grown up.

When Nelle’s body is released for burial, Michael arranges everything. Before she’s cremated, he asks for a moment alone. He pulls the sheet back from Nelle’s body. Death has already changed her face, she’s waxy, bloated from the autopsy, and Michael has to take a moment to poke her cheek, just to make sure this is real. He leans over her.

“You’re done playing games with our son’s life,” he whispers. “You got what you deserved, and I’m not sorry.”

Not that he has anything to be sorry for, of course. After all, he had nothing to do with it.

 

Notes:

I mean come one, who didn't want goody-goody Michael to snap and totally 100% have something to do with it?

Chapter 3: Three

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

“T-this is crazy!” Chase sputters, “Michael can’t marry Willow!”

“She has to!” Sasha insists, “Michael needs to marry someone wonderful, who loves Wiley, someone better than Nelle in every way.”

“No,” Willow says, not shocked or offended, as her boyfriend is. Instead, she sounds thoughtful. She turns around, looking between the three of them. “No…Michael has to marry Chase.”

Michael’s jaw drops. Chase is absolutely flabbergasted. Sasha looks equally surprised, but then her whole face changes. She actually starts beaming. “Willow, you’re an absolute genius!”

“You’re both nuts!” Chase cries. “What the hell would that—how would—no one would believe that!”

“I can’t believe I didn’t think of it sooner,” Sasha goes on, completely ignoring Chase, “I mean, it was so completely heteronormative of Diane to imply Michael needs a wife, Wiley had two dads from the start, and there’s plenty of reasons for both of them to be closeted!”

“No one is closeted!” Chase objects.

“And they knew each other way before they knew ether of us,” Willow adds, “I mean if asked we’d have to say we knew—”

“And we know the truth, neither of you are in the closet, at least I don’t think you are,” Sasha says, “And maybe we’d get some ribbing but oh my god can you picture the look on Nelle’s face?!”

“Yes!” Willow turns to Chase. “Babe I know it might be uncomfortable but between the three of us, if Michael needs to boost his social standing and household you’re perfect! You’re a great cop, you are the most law abiding person ever—”

“The complete opposite of Nelle!”

“And you would never marry the son of Sonny Corinthos if you didn’t have absolute faith in him!”

Chase has a look on his face like his soul has left his body. “I—I—I can’t believe—the two of you—!” He whirls on Michael, who has been disturbingly quiet. “Will you please say something?!”

Michael’s face is unreadable. “This is the most out of the world idea I have ever heard in my entire life.”

“Thank you!” Chase says.

“And it just might work,” Michael says.

Chase grabs his jacket and marches out of the room.

“He’ll be back,” Willow says confidently. “I have undergone so much sensitivity training, I have a whole list of reasons why someone would stay in the closet, get me some paper and a pen, we can’t leave a digital trace, thank god this house is full of fireplaces…”

Sasha laughs as she rifles through a writing desk, “Hasn’t ELQ been donating to LGBTQ causes since you took the wheel? We can set up some kind of yearly grant, really push this in people’s faces, not shy away, make it totally proud, my god the social justice warriors are getting chills down their spines…”

“No one can ever know we are having this discussion,” Michael says, “The last thing I wanna do is tell Wiley his mom was a liar and then weave a lie myself but Nelle is so crafty and devious…”

“Then we won’t lie,” Willow says, already scribbling on a notepad. “We will just tell the most roundabout truth ever.”

 

Chase returns an hour later, pouting and blushing. “I cannot believe I am actually considering this.”

Michael, Sasha, and Willow look up from their notes. A fire is crackling in the fireplace, Willow has a heavy-looking book in her lap, and Michael is flipping through a yearbook.

“Oh, you’re back,” Willow greets.

Chase looks around. “You never thought I would ultimately refuse this, did you?”

Willow at least looks a little sheepish. “I mean, I know the only thing you hate more than Nelle getting off for murder is Nelle getting shared custody of Wiley.”

Chase collapses on the sofa, rubbing his hands over his face. “I have been going over this in my head again and again…”

“And you realized that Willow and Sasha have made many good points?” Michael asks.

Chase lowers his hands and glowers. “I have some conditions.”

“Name it, honey,” Michael says, entirely too happy.

“Number one, no pet names!” Chase snaps. “Number two, not in this house! The fewer people we have to pretend for the better off my mental health will be.”

“Oh, we have a plan,” Sasha says. “Don’t worry, this is going to be amazing.”

 

Chase has to admit, he had questions about this whole charade, but the look on Nelle’s face is really making it hard for him to have regrets.

“…When Nelle was arrested and I thought my son was gone, I leaned on Chase. He had been in a relationship with Nelle too, he had been tricked by her, he had warned me about her. I felt so…stupid, and he told me not to blame myself, that he had felt the same way…”

“Objection, your Honor!” Nelle’s lawyer calls.

“Objection for what exactly?” Diane all but chuckles, “My client was asked to specify how he and detective Chase began a relationship and he is explaining.”

“Using an account of a crime for which my client was cleared!”

“Uh, no,” Michael corrects, “At the time, Nelle was arrested for trying to kill me, she wasn’t cleared for that.”

“This is completely ridiculous!” Nelle explodes, “They are not together, they are not married, not for real!”

“You are out of order,” The judge snaps.

“No this court is out of order!” Nelle shouts, her lawyer trying to calm her, “I can’t believe anyone would buy this, Michael and Chase are both completely straight, there is no way they actually feel anything for each other!”

“That’s homophobic, biphobic, and so many other phobics,” Michael says under his breath.

Chase is really having to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from grinning. He hopes his pained grimace comes off as embarrassment for Nelle’s sake, because she really is doing a fantastic job of tanking her own case.

The judge needs only the afternoon to deliberate. Really, Michael and Chase probably didn’t need to get married for Michael to win sole custody…but Chase has to admit, it has been kind of fun.

Nelle’s reaction alone would have been worth it, but really the reaction of the whole town has been priceless. Chase thought he would get some ribbing from the other cops for it, but this is an era of sensitivity, and people seem more anxious about offending him than objecting to his lifestyle choices. He’s getting congratulations from everyone, and compliments (of all things) on how lovely it is for Michael and Wiley to have him in their lives.

It’s a little hard lying to everyone, but Chase can’t say his marriage is a farce. He and Michael live together (and it is pretty sweet to live in the Quartermaine mansion), they sleep in the same bed (kind of, it’s two twin mattresses pushed together and Chase finally took away the pillow divider because Michael was right, they’re grown men, they know themselves, and Wiley is worth it), and they are raising Wiley…together. Sort of.

Well…Chase does get up at night when Wiley cries, and Michael does too. At first it was just Michael, but then Chase felt bad and went along. Now Wiley sometimes bats Michael away and holds his arms out to Chase, and Chase has to admit he’s more than a little smug about that.

The best thing about it is no one really questions Willow and Sasha visiting. Willow is Wiley’s godmother, and she and Sasha became roommates, and Willow likes to bring Sasha over when she comes to visit. Michael and Chase are shopping for houses right now, their family needs room to expand, and room for Wiley’s favorite godmother and auntie to come and maybe spend the night once in a while. Privately the four of them joke that Wiley has two dads and two moms, and no one can ever say he’s lacking for love.

 

Notes:

The writers are cowards and this should have happened.