Work Text:
Carry You Home
“Varian?”
Varian heard his Dad’s voice, but he couldn’t take his eyes away from the window. The snow was falling, and in the distance he could make out Cassandra’s tower, that lonely spike that stretched above the trees, barely visible apart from it being darker than the rest of the nights sky.
“Son?”
“It’s funny how each year passes faster than the last.”
He turned to see his father grimly nodding.
“Yes, they do. It’s part of growing up. Are you alright Varian?”
“I don’t know.” Varian said honestly, clutching at his arm. The Christmas eve party was in full swing, everything light and warm, laughter floating through the air, the movement of people dancing, it all seemed too much.
Quirin clasped Varian on the shoulder as he walked by.
“It’s been a bad year, and I think we both know why, but the year will soon be over. It’s time to wipe the slate, forgive yourself for your mistakes Varian, everybody else has.”
“But, what if I’m not done making mistakes Dad?”
Quirin’s eyebrows furrowed.
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t know.” Varian shrugged him off, but as he was turning to leave he turned to his father and hugged him. “I’m sorry Dad, I do love you.”
“Varian, what’s going on?”
“I think I have a choice to make…”
He was interrupted by a sound of clinking, the clearing of a throat, and King Fredrick was climbing onto a small makeshift stage at the front of the hall.
“We have many traditions at this time of year, and before the merrymaking begins, I want us to all raise our glasses, as we do every year, and drink a toast to the people we have said goodbye to this year. Life is always shorter than we want it to be, tonight we will take a moment to reminisce, and remind ourselves to hold onto the important things in our lives. To absent friends.”
Everybody raised their glasses, except Varian, the words were worming there way into his brain, strengthening his reserve.
“What if I don’t want to say goodbye yet?” He whispered.
“Oh.” Quirin said his eyes widening.
Varian’s glass smashed across the dance floor as he ran for the door.
***
It was a cold night, but dawn was about to break. He had stumbled at first, but as he had climbed higher and higher the night had got lighter. A beam of sunlight was falling through the large window when he got up to the top. He looked around, almost missing her at first in the cavernous space. She looked so small, so vulnerable, nothing like the last time he had seen her.
She was curled up, under some blankets on the floor, a dying fire in a small pit next to her. Careful not to startle her awake Varian crossed the floor, he didn’t know what to do, how best to make himself known. It didn’t matter in the end, Cassandra startled awake and raised herself up on an elbow staring at him. He watched as a thin rock blade materialised in her hand.
“It’s only me, there’s nobody else.” Varian said holding his hands up to show he meant no harm.
“What are you doing here?”
“I wanted to know if I could persuade you to come home.”
“That’s not my home anymore.” She sneered, but Varian felt he could detect something else there, some sadness perhaps.
“Okay then.” He said walking over and sitting across the fire from her.
“What are you doing?” She asked again, this time seeming a little less sure of herself.
“It’s Christmas, I’m not going to let you be on your own.”