Chapter Text
Remus Lupin was hidden in the shadows of Nocturn Alley, quietly watching the front door of a rundown apothecary. Two known Death Eaters had entered a little while ago, followed by a nervous looking young witch. Unfortunately they had cast a Muffliato charm, which made it impossible for Remus to listen to what was going on inside, even with the Extendable Ears Molly had confiscated from Fred and George.
A glance at his watch told Remus that it was almost midnight. Two hours had passed since the Death Eaters had entered the building. Remus’ limbs were aching from spending so much time in a crouched position, but he didn’t dare move. It was dull work really, there wasn’t much to do besides waiting and the mission would probably be irrelevant to the Order anyway.
Remus propped his head back against the wall and let his eyes wander up and down the street. He wished he had someone to keep him company. Maybe Arthur or Kingsley, who always had some stories about the Ministry to share. Or Tonks. Remus’ stomach fluttered. Tonks, who managed to make the dullest stakeout a memorable experience. Nymphadora, who he tried to ban from his mind, but still succeeded in being the first and last thought of his day. Remus scolded himself for the stupid grin, that had taken over his face. He had work to do, he had to concentrate on the task at hand.
Remus was still struggling with himself, when he noticed a faint blue light floating towards him. It was a patronus, a phoenix to be exact. Dumbledore’s patronus. Remus stomach dropped. The headmaster rarely sent messages, it normally would be either Kingsley or Moody. Forgetting about his intention to stay hidden, Remus got up immediately. His legs were protesting, but he didn’t care. The phoenix had reached him and opened its beak to speak with Dumbledore’s voice.
“There has been an attack at the Department of Mysteries. Assemble at Headquarters at once.”
Remus’ blood froze in his veins and his body went numb. If the Death Eaters had started firing curses at him right there and then, he would have been helpless, completely unable to defend himself. His thoughts were racing a mile a minute and his mind was once again filled with pictures of her. Nymphadora. She had been scheduled to patrol in the Ministry tonight. Remus felt panic rise inside his chest and without thinking he turned on the spot.
A second later he appeared on the front steps of Grimmauld Place. His body acting of its own accord, he slammed the door open and reached the basement kitchen in seconds, not caring about the portrait of Sirius’ mother wailing at the sudden disturbance.
“How is she?”, the words had blurted out of Remus’ mouth before he could collect himself. Sirius was the only one present in the gloomy kitchen and he slowly lifted his head from where he had placed it in his hands.
“They took her to St. Mungo’s.” Sirius’ voice was uncharacteristically low, barely more than a whisper. Remus’ insides clenched painfully. A small part of him had hoped, that Tonks had fought off the attacker unharmed.
“What happened? She’ll be alright, won’t she?” It was impossible to keep his voice unaffected by the fear that tormented his brain. Remus knew, that he should calm himself and be strong for Sirius, Tonks was his cousin after all, but it wouldn’t work. His knees felt wobbly and threatened to buckle underneath his weight.
“I don’t know. Dumbledore’s message only said, that she was being taken to the hospital.” Sirius looked just as helpless as Remus felt.
“Moony, you’re bleeding”, Sirius said suddenly and pointed to the drops of blood on the floor. Remus looked down at himself and only just noticed his soaked sleeve. Deep red was blooming from his elbow down to his wrist.
“Must have splinched myself”, he said absentmindedly. Remus could feel Sirius rounding the table and lifting the sleeve of his cloak to examine the wound, but he couldn’t care less. The only pain he felt was inside his chest, where his heart seemed determined to tear itself apart.
A loud thump from upstairs snapped Remus back to reality. Without warning he ripped his injured arm from Sirius’ grasp and took two steps at once up to the hallway. He was met by a tousled looking Mad-Eye Moody.
“Do you know anything?”, Remus gasped. Sirius appeard beside him.
“Kingsley took her to St. Mungo’s. She lost a lot of blood.” Mad-Eye was looking even graver than usual. Remus could hear Sirius draw in a sharp breath and couldn’t help but wonder, how his friend was still able to breathe.
The three of them descended to the kitchen again and Sirius finished patching up Remus splinched arm. He seemed determined to busy himself and started to rummage the cupboards for some Firewhisky next.
Remus’ feet carried him over to the table, where he sat down on one of the chairs. The dusty old clock above the doorway pointed to half past midnight, but it seemed like an eternity since he had waited outside the apothecary in Nocturn Alley.
The next few hours passed in a blur. Molly and Arthur arrived shortly after Moody, informing them, that Harry had seen the attack in his dream. Harry entered the kitchen by floo a few minutes later, accompanied by Ron. He looked dreadful, but managed to depict his dream in a monotonous voice. Everyone listened to him in horror and Remus just wanted to crawl under the table and bury his face in his hands. Pictures of Tonks’ unconscious body, blood oozing from her small frame and painting her delicate face red, flooded his mind.
The silence following Harry’s tale felt heavy, only interrupted by Molly’s occasional sob.
Over the course of an hour almost every Order member found their way to Headquarters, leading to Harry’s story being repeated over and over again. The kitchen was filled with worry and tension, when Dumbledore finally arrived at about three in the morning. The headmaster looked older than ever, shadows cast over his piercing blue eyes and Remus’ hopes shrank to a bare minimum. He felt empty, exhaustion and grief threatening to overtake him.
“You probably all know by now, that one of us has been attacked tonight at the Department of Mysteries”, Dumbledore started, looking around the room. “Nymphadora Tonks has been taken to St. Mungo’s with severe injuries. I’m afraid I cannot assure you of her well-being yet. She has lost a lot of blood, but the healers are doing everything they can to save her life.”
The room filled with tired whispers and Molly’s muffled sobs again. Remus could feel himself drown, the walls seemed to close in on him. He had to get out. He couldn’t remain in this suddenly tiny kitchen any longer. Somehow he managed to get up from his seat at the table and in three long strides he was at the door.
“Remus”, he heard a calm voice behind him. Remus turned around, jaw clenched and fists balled, to meet Dumbledore’s steady gaze. As always it felt like the old wizard could see right through him.
“She’s a fighter”, Dumbledore said with a knowing look and the faintest smile on his lips, before he disappeared into the fireplace. Remus felt himself nod and rushed up to the library.
It was soothing and terrifying at once to finally be alone. Darkness surrounded him, but it was what he wanted. Silence and pitch black darkness. He closed the door behind him and leaned back against the cool wall. For a few minutes Remus tried to concentrate only on his breathing. In and out. In and out. It worked quite well and soon he slid down to sit on the floor. In and out. In and out.
Slowly, Remus drifted off into a restless sleep. Unwanted pictures of lifeless bodies flashed before his inner eye. Streaks of pink hair soaked in blood. A laughter echoing in his mind, quickly turning into screams. Tonks hugging him, her skin like ice.
Remus jerked awake as his head collided with the table next to him. His hands were shaking, his breath hitched. He blinked away tears and got up suddenly. Wanting to be alone hadn’t been a good idea. Wand in hand he lit the fireplace and started to pace up and down in front of it.
It was almost five in the morning, when Remus heard the front door open. Seconds later Kingsley’s low voice cut through the silence. Remus made his way down the stairs to meet Sirius and a bunch of Order members eagerly waiting for news.
“Tonks is stable. They extracted the venom and injected a potion to regenerate her blood. Her wounds are still bleeding, but they are working hard to patch her up”, Kingsley said breathlessly, “She is stable. Her parents are with her.”
Remus let out a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding. His hands gripped the stair’s railing and he let his knees give in, sitting down slowly. It felt like the weight of the world had been lifted off his shoulders. Exhaustion and relief made his body shake uncontrollably, but he didn’t care. Nymphadora was save. Remus buried his face in his hands and laughed.