Chapter Text
goldie.guard:
Really.
mischiefs_other_half:
???
wait a sec is this GG??
Yes.
You seriously stole my cloak just to give me your Penstagram user?
and ur seriously texting me :DD
I didn't think you would!!
Wait
did u make a Penstagram just to message me??
You don't have any posts
Of course not! Don't be ridiculous.
mmmmm you sureeeee
...Okay, so I might have. But that doesn't mean anything! I was just appalled that someone could do something as… baffling as you!
Stealing from a coven official? Seriously?
I mean, you hang out with the Owl Lady so I suppose that makes sense. But I was under the impression Blights were supposed to be sophisticated.
supposed to be. doesn't mean we aree
but we're sophisticated enough to kick ur ass if ur fight with Amity means anything ;P
Is that a threat?
pfft no. chill dude
soooo whatre ya doin
Aside from messaging you? Official Emperor's Coven business.
ooooo cool, cool.
good to know i'm just as important as emp's coven stuff ;)
You are not, let me assure you.
awwwwww ur breaking my heart Goldie
</3
Do not call me Goldie.
but u literally have goldie in ur user
Because @golden.guard was already taken for some reason.
ahhhh that means u have fans bro!!
or an impersonator
but probably just fans who think ur cool
i'm a fan ;)
What is with those symbols you keep using?
the emoticons? They're how teens these days show expressions via message, Oldie >;)
I'm like the same age as you, I'm not old.
but u message like ur oldddd
you aren't writing an essay, no need for proper grammar lol
Someone of my status does not write improperly. I'd look stupid. Like you.
And do I even want to know what 'lol' is?
its a human expression! Or abbreviation i guess. it stands for laughing out loud
but Luz says you don't actually use it when ur laughing out loud, just when u find something kinda funny
or you wanna make a serious situation less serious
Human expressions are strange.
but fun!
aparently the human world is wayyy more like advanced than us with scroll magic
or Luz called it technology since they don't actually have magic
they have fonnes and compeutors and tellyvision instead
im not really sure how to spell those words tho
...Rain in the Human World doesn't boil or burn.
it doesn't??
i think Luz might have mentioned that before maybe
wait how do u know that?? have u been to the human world?
No. But I know someone who… has personal knowledge of the Human World.
ohhhhhHHHHH
like they've been there before??
I can neither confirm nor deny that.
pfffft this isn't a frickin interogation my dude
I am not 'your dude.' I'm the Golden Guard, the new Coven Head of the Emperor's Coven, and the Emperor's right-hand.
so what ur saying is ur actually my bestie?? :))
What? No? What even is that?
best friend lol
and ur right, Jerbo would get jelly if he knew i had a new bestie
Who's Jerbo? And why would he become jelly?
haha i mean jealous
the kid named Gus who's a friend of Luz's taught me that one
Jerbo's one of my friends from school :)
he's pretty chill, you'd like him
Well if he's nothing like you, then I think I would.
ouch :((
y r u so mean
u know u like me <3
You're intolerable.
but ur still messaging meeeee
despite u having more important 'emperor's coven business' to do ;))
I suppose you do make a good distraction from paperwork.
paperwork? ew
And distraction? ;)) I'm great at distracting people you know ;P
I don't… need to be distracted. Whatever you mean with those strange 'emoticons.' In fact, I SHOULD be focused on my paperwork. It's extremely important to the coven.
what 16 year old does paperwork ://
you r 16 right? Amity said u looked my age, just scrawnier
I am not scrawny. I am the perfect build for my position. Tell your sister she's wrong.
And yes, I am sixteen.
haha she'd probably flip if i told her i was messaging the guy who threatened her girlfriend
which, not cool by the way, but i'm willing to look past it cause she also called u sad
I wouldn't have had to threaten anyone if she had just given me the key.
And, on second thought, don't tell your sister anything. I don't know where she and her human got it into their heads that I am 'sad.'
mmm, as Luz would say, u do radiate sad vibes
i imagine having to be a coven head at 16 would b pretty stressful
...It is. But it's nothing I can't handle.
you couldn't even handle a 14yo in a fight bro
I absolutely could! I was without my usual staff and exhausted from earlier fighting yet I still held my own and got the key from her. I have been trained by only the best my entire life as a genius teen prodigy, and you think I couldn't handle a fourteen year old in a simple fight?
well I mean the facts are there
Amity came home pretty much unscathed, just tired and bruised
And she still had that blood or whatever
She still had Titan's blood?
yeah?
i mean no
she didn’t
i probably shouldn't have told you that
woops
uhm
just disregard that??
Please
It's fine. I won't tell anyone else like Emperor Belos if that's what you're worried about. The human having Titan's blood is no concern of his so long as he has his own.
But that does explain why the key was cracked. I hadn't seen it break throughout all of our battle.
Oh.
thanks for not telling i guess?
Amity would have killed me
Hm. For the record, I don't hate your sister. She's annoying, but I understand she was just trying to help her girlfriend.
well that's good
i was teasing you and all but i mean
you could ruin her life. if you told anyone that she fought you
or even that she was working with Eda and them
so like
thanks for not doing that
...Of course. I'm not trying to ruin anyone's life. I'm just… doing my job.
yeah
Anyway. I have that important paperwork to get to. So this is the end of our conversation.
aw :(
talk to you later??
...Maybe.
:D
k, have fun with your boring paperwork!!
new bestie <3
Not your ‘bestie’ still.
not yet >;)
actual bye now lol
Bye.