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[two people sit in a pub. you don’t need to know what the pub looks like—largely, you already do. it’s crowded, and it’s warm when you are happy. if you have the energy to notice it, there’s earnest beauty hidden in its corners. if you are tired and empty, you’ll see sharp angles around the tables and wonder how come it took you so long to get hurt again.]
[two people sit in a pub. you don’t need to know who they look like—largely, you already do. they are stubborn and, on a good day, they are gorgeous. on a bad day, they are tragic and they carry their fatal flaws in their heart, they hold them in their hands.]
[today is a good day.]
[they are leaning on the wooden back of a booth, under a wall of pictures. they look at each other lazily, comfortably, unhurriedly. she leans her head back to laugh, and he pushes himself a little closer to her body, indignant and endeared.]
“i’m sorry, did i say something funny?”
[his voice comes off with dull edges. it comes off tired the way children are tired when they smile at someone they love and giggle without reason. it comes off pink, and skin-soft.]
“next time someone asks me what kind of person you are i’m going to tell them about all this—”
[she gestures with both of her hands as if trying to catch the feeling and feel its texture through her fingers.]
“—all this inexplicable beef you have with a bunch of dead scientists who didn’t motivate their love for physics in a way you approve of.”
[he laughs, though he keeps it brief. slowly, his expression falls back to fake-serious, and he leans in, closer to her face.]
“you know what i think?”
[she is intrigued by this. she looks down for a moment, as if evaluating her next move. when her gaze comes back to his, neither of them feels the weight of it. it’s light, the way wind is light when it tries to turn the end of summer into autumn and can’t quite make it.]
“what?”
“i think that you are too exhausted to comment on my incredibly interesting science trivia, but you do want to, and you are trying to be funny because you can’t be clever.”
[she crooks her eyebrows. how dare you, bastard. ]
“first of all—”
[already, he laughs. she puts her hand on his shoulder to keep him still.]
“listen to me, first of all, i am clever even when i’m funny.”
[he nods, immediately. it’s affectionate mockery just as much as it is sincere admiration.]
“oh, of course ma’am, i did not mean to imply otherwise.”
“yeah, well. you better not, sir.”
[wordlessly, he rests his forehead on hers. it’s a little awkward because his movements aren’t well-coordinated right now, but mostly it’s sweet.]
“or else?”
[she looks happy, and he looks smug because he can tell.]
“or else, ma’am?”
[there’s a confidence in his voice that’s exclusive to her. when he moves his head to kiss her cheek, she shuts her eyes and puffs her cheeks. it’s adorable. he doesn’t kiss her again, because he never knows if he can, because they have crossed some bridges before but they have spoken about none of them, and it feels vulnerable to build new ones.]
[he doesn’t kiss her again, so she takes his head in her hands and kisses him once straight on his lips. when they part, the look in his eyes isn’t really surprised or moved, it is excited. it’s the look he might give you if you had the whole day available, actually, not just the morning, the little smile he might flash you if you wanted to go to the nearby museum, which you have never been to, and asked him to come with.]
“i see.”
[she laughs, and absent-mindedly tucks a strand of hair behind his ear.]
“you see what?”
[he shrugs. easy question, sasha. easy question.]
“you, i guess.”
[she kisses him again, and it’s more than a simple peck this time. he lets her, the way you let yourself breathe again after a dive, when finally you come back out of the water.]
“you know what i see, sims?”
[he shakes his head. on another occasion, he might have answered with a joke, but right now he settles on waiting for her to finish her thought.]
“i see that martin and tim’s dart match might be close to its inevitable end.”
[he raises his eyebrows, interested.]
“who won?”
[she comes a little closer still, and rests her chin on his shoulder, investigating. her hands are on his hips.]
“no idea. they seem to be very into it. flirting all the way through, i’m sure.”
[she stands back a little to stretch her back, and he smiles, following her movements with the ease of someone who loves you on instinct.]
“kids these days, right?”
[she rolls her eyes, and feels blood rush to her ears. it’s not embarrassing. if anything, she hopes he notices it. little gift for you, jon. i let you have it.]
“yeah, fuck off.”
[jon reaches out to leave a kiss on the corner of her lips. she doesn’t expect it, but it doesn’t land with the novelty of surprises.]
“sorry, ma’am. i don’t think i know what you are talking about.”
[she’d say, you are not cute, but he very much is.]
[from the other end of the room, tim catches her eye, and winks at her. she’d consider telling him that he is not cute, even if that’s not true, either, but they are too far apart for that. instead, she rolls her eyes and winks back. he grins. of course he does.]
[she redirects her attention back to jon, and he is already waiting for her, calm and sleepy and alive.]
[it’s a good day today, and neither of them needs to know how the story ends.]
[fortunately, at least for this, it does not matter. if this is how it begins, there’s no version of this night that doesn’t end with a smile. if this is how it feels to stay close to each other, there’s no version of this warmth that’s not worth the try.]