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Secret Files of the Special Tasks Group

Summary:

When the galaxy is at stake, there's one group that will "hold the line!" no matter what the odds and stop the bad guys: The Special Tasks Group!

Their classified covert operations are revealed here for the first time. Read the exploits of the STG's top operatives Major Kirrahe and Dr. Mordin Solus!

Notes:

This is the first entry in a possible series of short, one-shot stories featuring the STG's Major Kirrahe and/or Mordin Solus. It is not a serial but rather an anthology: each chapter will be an individual, self-contained story.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Incident At Mala'Nak

Chapter Text

A glowing, translucent orb floated up next to Liara T'Soni. "Shadow Broker, there is an incoming message from the Batarian Hegemony supreme command marked 'high priority.' I am transferring it to your main viewing screen."

"Shadow Broker, I am Captain Ka'hairal Balak of the Batarian External Forces," the message began. "On behalf of the Batarian Hegemony, I am requesting all data available for purchase relating to the Special Tasks Group's involvement in the incident at Mala'Nak. The hegemony will pay your standard fee and requires the data within three solar days."

Liara T'Soni leaned back in her chair and sipped her mint tea as she contemplated the message. "Glyph," she eventually called out, "Tell the Batarian Hegemony the message was received and we will respond within one solar day. Then provide me with an overview of the key items from the databanks relating to the planet Mala'Nak, with a focus on recent incidents and developments."

"At once, Shadow Broker," the glowing, translucent orb replied. It spun and flashed for a few seconds, then announced, "Done, Shadow Broker. Transferring the data to your main viewing screen. I have taken the liberty of arranging the items in chronological order."


[Public Information] Encyclopedia Galactica (2186 edition) entry for Mala'Nak. - The fifth planet of the Lutarian System in Kite's Nest. Named 'Mala'Nak' ('Tangled Nest') by the batarians who colonized it in 1835 CE, at which time it was considered a lush garden planet. The colonies supported an estimated 12 million batarians at their height. The colonists were evacuated from the planet during 1953-4 CE when the concentration of pollutants created by element zero mining rendered the atmosphere toxic to batarians and most other sapient species. The planet was uninhabited for two centuries following that. Beginning in 2173 CE, Salarian Union scientists used the planet to test new ecological terraforming technology. Within three years, the atmosphere was cleansed of pollutants and the local flora began a remarkably swift comeback. In 2178 CE, the Salarian Union officially laid claim to the planet and received colonization rights from the Council. As of 2186, the planet is home to a population of 2 million salarians and growing. The planet's farms are the galaxy's third largest producers of free-range varren.


[Public Information] Citadel Newsnet - The Council has formally rejected a demand by the Batarian Hegemony that it order the Salarian Union to abandon it's claim to the disputed planet of Mala'Nak and relocate all salarian colonists there. In a unanimous 3-0 vote, the Council accepted the Salarian Union's argument that the Batarian Hegemony had renounced any claim to Mala'Nak by leaving the planet uninhabited for two centuries. Salarian Union representative Valern abstained from the vote, citing the conflict-of-interest. Speaking on behalf of the Council, turian Councilor Sparatus said, "The batarians should have lodged their complaints when the Salarian Union first requested colonization rights in 2178, not seven years after the fact. That they were not alerted to the Salarian Union's request at the time or that the request was not publicly announced is immaterial. That is the cost of the hegemony's refusal to address its pariah status and restore formal diplomatic ties to the Council. To put it more bluntly, if they want to continue with their slave trade, this is the price they pay. Besides, if they had actually maintained an interest in Mala'Nak, they would have noticed the Salarian Union's actions much earlier and would not have needed an alert from the Council." - Emily Wong reporting.


[Public Information] Statement by the Batarian Hegemony regarding the Council's announcement - The batarian people people stand firm in their rejection of the Council's outrageous and illegal decision to sanction the invasion and occupation of the hegemony's planet Mala'Nak by the Salarian Union. This is theft and no amount of posturing by the Salarian Union's allies within the Council can hide the reality that this is a grievous insult to the hegemony and its people. Batarians will continue to seek the means to restore what is rightfully theirs.


[Public Information] Statement by the Salarian Union regarding the Council's announcement - The salarian people welcome the Council's decision to recognize their sovereignty over the planet Mala'Nak, though this outcome was never under serious dispute. The planet had been abandoned for more than two centuries and under long-standing Council rules was therefore open for claiming by any species, with the Salarian Union indisputably being the first. The planet would likely still be up for claiming had salarian innovations not eliminated the pollution in the planet's atmosphere and made it once again habitable. It was only after this miraculous recovery that the Batarian Hegemony even thought to pursue its long-expired claim to the planet.


[Secret Data] Turian Navy reconnaissance ship Afrekennus dispatch - While patrolling the Lutarian System, long-range scanners detected two batarian dreadnoughts traveling through the region. The ships' trajectory indicates they are heading to Mala'Nak. Update: Information cleared for transmission to the Council.


[Secret Data] Special Tasks Group intel report, Mala'Nak outpost - Batarian shuttles detected entering atmosphere, depositing engineers and mechs at coordinates 458.72 by 23.47. The location is a mountain plateau and the highest elevation in that region. Construction is underway at the site. The remoteness of the site and its elevation are preventing STG operatives from covertly disrupting construction.


[Secret Data] Special Tasks Group intel report, Mala'Nak outpost, marked 'urgent'- Surveillance confirms that the batarian construction project is for long-range artillery. The size of the armament and the height of plateau indicates a 98% probability that the artillery could reach Heranon, Mala'Nak's largest salarian colonization site. Two batarian dreadnoughts detected outside the planet's atmosphere. The ships are believed to have previously evaded detection by hiding on the darkside of Mala'Nak's second moon. Salarian Union ships stationed at Mala'Nak and the surrounding Lutarian System lack sufficient firepower to engage batarian vessels. Request Salarian Union provide additional ships.


[Secret Data] Special Tasks Group intel report, Mala'Nak outpost marked 'extremely urgent' - Batarian cannon construction nearly complete, weeks in advance of this outpost's earlier estimates. Batarians now believed to have used modular sections built off-world, then transported to Mala'Nak, to quickly assemble weapon.


[Secret Data] Special Tasks Group internal memo - Effective immediately, Aslep Swidd will be stepping down as chief of operations at the STG's Mala'Nak outpost and will take over as chief waste management technician at the STG's headquarters on Sur'Kesh. Everyone please give Aslep a warm welcome now that he is back home.


[Secret Data] Special Tasks Group tactical assessment of batarian presence on Mala'Nak - The batarian cannon placed on top of the mountain plateau utilizes ultraviolet frequency lasers, comparable to the latest turian warship technology. The site also includes long-range scanners. The turret complex the cannon rests on is five stories high and its outer walls are reinforced with silarus armoring. An estimated crew of 50 batarian engineers and guards are present at the complex. The cannon has a range allowing limited strikes in the outer atmosphere. It would be easily capable of striking the salarian colonies on the planet surface. Two batarian dreadnoughts maintain regular patrols in the planet's lower atmosphere. Any attempted orbital strikes to destroy the canon would require a fleet large enough to counter the dreadnoughts, both of which would be bolstered by the cannon on the planet surface. The likely casualty losses of such an attempt would be unacceptably high. An attempted lower atmosphere attack would face similar challenges, plus the cannon's long range scanners would preclude a surprise assault. A ground assault would also be highly challenging. The area surrounding the mountain is covered in dense vegetation and clear-cutting would be required to move in armored vehicles. The sheer cliffs on all sides of mountain would prevent the armored vehicles from reaching the cannon and attacking it at close range, necessitating instead an attack from a distance that would allow the armored vehicles' weapons an angle capable of striking at the mountain top. The vehicles would be detected through their emissions while still in range of cannon, which would have the high ground for the attack. Ground troops sufficient to assault the cannon would likely be detected before they came in range for an assault. The batarian scanners would detect the troops' weapons and equipment, which would stand out against the forest floor. An additional hazard is that feral varren are numerous in that region.


[Public Information] Citadel Newsnet - Salarian colonists on the planet Mala'Nak have uploaded homemade footage to the Extranet showing that batarians have built in secret a massive cannon on a mountaintop within range of the colony. The footage also shows that two batarian dreadnoughts have entered the planet's atmosphere and are patrolling the same region as the colony. The Batarian Hegemony has denied that any invasion is underway and said that its intentions on the planet are purely peaceful. Salarian colonists have not found the claims reassuring. "We're obviously extremely worried. Just a few shots from the cannon could turn the colony into a crater," one colonist said. The Council has called an emergency meeting with the batarian envoy to the Citadel to discuss the matter - Emily Wong reporting.


[Secret Data] Minutes of emergency closed Council meeting with Batarian Hegemony envoy - Participating: Councilor Tevos (presiding), Councilor Sparatus, and Councilor Udina (quorum present). Councilor Valern recused from voting, present as Salarian Union advocate. Envoy Zertak representing the Batarian Hegemony.

Councilor Valern asserts that the Salarian Union has sovereignty over Mala'Nak, as previously recognized by Council law. He moves that the Batarian Hegemony be ordered to dismantle the cannon and remove its dreadnoughts from the planet.

Envoy Zertak claims that Mala'Nak is part of the Batarian Hegemony and therefore it has the right to locate batarian ships and artillery at the planet. Envoy states that no further discussion on the matter is possible until the Council formally recognizes the planet as 'Mala'Nak, a batarian world invaded and occupied by salarian forces.'

Councilor Valern objects to any Council action that would dispute the Salarian Union's claim to Mala'Nak.

Following a three-hour debate, the Council quorum, Councilor Valern and Envoy Zertak agree on a compromise: the planet will be officially recognized as 'Mala'Nak, a world first colonized by the batarians.'

Councilor Valern re-states the Salarian Union's position that it has sovereignty over Mala'Nak as recognized by Council law. He moves that the Batarian Hegemony be ordered to dismantle the cannon and remove its dreadnoughts. He asserts that if the Batarian Hegemony were to regain control of Mala'Nak, it would merely destroy it through pollution a second time.

Envoy Zertak re-states the Batarian Hegemony's position that Mala'Nak belongs to it and the salarian colonists must be evacuated. He adds that even if the Council were to recognize the Salarian Union's claim, the cannon and the dreadnoughts would still be legal under the Council's colonization accords. He notes that the accords allow a species that previously colonized a planet to place memorials to any battles fought on the planet. Envoy Zertak states that the cannon is to memorialize a great batarian victory on Mala'Nak against alien invaders. He asserts that since the Council has recognized the Batarian Hegemony's claim to having previously colonized the planet, it must therefore sanction the memorial.

Councilor Udina states he is impressed by the hegemony's position, calling it a "damned clever loophole." Addendum: Councilor Udina states for the record that he was speaking abstractly regarding the Batarian Hegemony's actions and does not in any way endorse them.

Councilor Sparatus disputes the hegemony's claim, asserts there is no historical record of a battle of any significant size taking place on Mala'Nak.

Councilor Udina strongly recommends that Envoy Zertak not debate the turian councilor on matters of military history, citing a 50 credit bet he lost last month regarding a detail of the First Contact War.

Envoy Zertak states that the memorial commemorates the successful repulsion of volus invaders in 1867 CE.

Councilor Tevos calls 10 minute recess to allow Councilors Valern, Sparatus and Udina time to stop laughing.

Following the resumption of the meeting, Councilor Sparatus moves that the Batarian Hegemony's claim that the cannon memorializes a volus invasion be dismissed on the grounds of gross historical inaccuracy. Sparatus notes that the volus had long been a protectorate of the Turian Empire at the time of the alleged incident and thus relied on the turian fleet for all defense-related matters. He argues that a volus invasion was therefore impossible because it lacked a fleet of warships of its own.

Envoy Zertak re-states claim that the memorial commemorates the successful repulsion of volus invaders in 1867 CE, cites records kept by the hegemony to back up the claim.

Councilor Udina moves that the volus ambassador be invited to the meeting to address the charge. Councilor Sparatus seconds the motion.

Councilor Tevos calls 20 minute recess to allow time to summon Vol Protectorate ambassador Din Korlak to the meeting.

Following the resumption of the meeting, Ambassador Korlak refutes Envoy Zertak's charge that the volus ever sought to invade Mala'Nak and insists that the record reflect his belief that the claim is "incredibly stupid."

Envoy Zertak again cites batarian records of the alleged incident, which state that armed volus ships approached Mala'Nak and were subsequently forced to retreat.

Ambassador Korlak notes that the batarians' own records state that the ships were flagged as trading vessels and that they retreated after being warned that the volus crews would be arrested for refusing to pay additional transport taxes should they set foot on the planet. Korlak adds that the new taxes went well beyond the then-existing trade accord between the Vol Protectorate and the Bartarian Hegemony and were later dropped by the hegemony.

Envoy Zertak claims that the volus ships were armed and they stated their initial intention to land on the planet surface without paying the taxes. They only retreated once the batarian fleet was mobilized. Envoy Zertak claims this constitutes the successful repulsion of an invasion.

Ambassador Korlak notes that the trade ships were only lightly armed. He states the purpose of their armaments was so that, in the event of an attack by batarian pirates, the trade ships could hold the raiders off until turian ships could respond to a distress call and provide protection. Ambassador Korlak adds that batarian pirate raids were frequent at the time, the outlaws operating with seeming impunity in batarian space. The ambassador states that the Batarian Hegemony only levied the additional taxes after turian escorts reduced the number of pirate attacks. Korlak notes the irony that the batarians claimed to never be able to see the pirates operating in their space despite all members of the batarian species possessing four eyes.

Councilor Valern states for the record that it is a scientific fact that no matter how many eyes a species has on its head it will still not be able to see if that head is lodged inside the species' own rectum.

Envoy Zertak re-states claim that the volus ships were armed invaders and the Batarian Hegemony repelled them, adds that the Council's accords on military memorials at former colony sites do not contain any specific requirements regarding the nature of the battle fought.

Ambassador Korlak is excused from the meeting by Councilor Tevos. Ambassador Korlak asks if he can continue to help the Council by returning later with any food or drinks they may require. Councilor Tevos says that will not be necessary. Ambassador Korlak states for the record that he was not seriously offering to fetch refreshments. Councilor Tevos states for the record that she was aware of this.

Councilor Udina notes that the cannon on Mala'Nak is functional and that the two batarian dreadnoughts are now inside the planet atmosphere and in the vicinity of salarian population centers. He asserts these details indicate their purpose is not to memorialize any past conflict. He adds that the details bring to mind an old human aphorism, "No shit, Sherlock."

Envoy Zertak states that the Council's accords on military memorials at former colony sites do not contain any specific requirement that memorials involve only de-commissioned artillery. He adds that the dreadnoughts are present to participate in ceremonies marking the 350th anniversary of the battle.

Councilor Valern objects, notes the 350th anniversary of the alleged incident will not happen for another three decades. The councilor suggests this constitutes proof that the Batarian Hegemony is no better at reading calendars than it is at honoring trade accords or interpreting Council rules.

Envoy Zertak states that the dreadnoughts are early, adds that the Council's accords on military memorials at former colony sites do not contain any specific requirements regarding how long before an anniversary event participants can appear. Envoy Zertak states that it is important to the batarian people that the cannons sound and the ships fly to mark the occasion.

Councilor Sparatus contends that the Mala'Nak memorial would have the virtue of commemorating one of the Batarian Hegemony's greatest military achievements. He asks Envoy Zertak if he concurs on this point. Envoy Zertak declines to respond.

Councilor Tevos suggests that as a good faith gesture, the Batarian Hegemony agree to decommission the cannon prior to the 350th anniversary event and have the dreadnoughts leave the planet until one week before the anniversary. Tevos offers to send a group of neutral asari observers to Mala'Nak to verify the actions.

Envoy Zertak calls the offer "deeply insulting" and rejects it. He states that the asari could send every prostitute on Thessia to the batarian homeworld of Kar'Shan and that would not be enough to persuade the batarian people to agree to dismantle the memorial or to relinquish their claim to Mala'Nak. Envoy Zertak adds that such a move might nevertheless solve the matter since removing all prostitutes on Thessia would leave the asari homeworld so depopulated that the salarians on Mala'Nak would have a new place to colonize. He restates the Batarian Hegemony's demand that the salarian colonists leave Mala'Nak and adds that the hegemony is "ready and able" to force the issue.

Councilor Tevos states it is clear that no common ground can be reached on this matter and calls the meeting adjourned.


[Secret Data] Dispatch from Salarian Councilor Valern to Dalatrass Linron - The batarians said 'no.'


[Secret Data] Message from Dalatrass Linron to Special Tasks Group Headquarters, Sur'Kesh - Initiate Contingency Plan - Operation 1812.


[Secret Data] ***Top Secret, highest level clearance required*** Mission report by Special Tasks Group's Major Kirrahe regarding the 3rd Infiltration Regiment's actions as part of Operation 1812 -

09:03 - Following two-day, 50 kilometer march, my 8-man unit has reached the base of the mountain that the batarians' cannon rests on. There is no indication that we were detected during the march. All of our weapons, electronic gear and mass effect-utilizing equipment including the individual anti-gravity generators were turned off and powered down during the march across the jungle floor. The batarians' scanners should not have been able to notice us.

Specialist Solus' feral varren pacification measures proved 100% effective. In all cases where the beasts stalked 3rd Infiltration Regiment members during the march to the mountain, deploying the countermeasures prevented attacks. The varren ate the countermeasures and the narcotics inside the meat items rendered the beasts docile and sleepy. I was forced to admonish Operative Rentola for excessive belly-rubbing of pacified animals. The time that consumed did slow our progress towards the mountain marginally.

We must now be inside the minimum range for the batarians' scanning devices. Nevertheless, I am ordering the team to hold off powering-up weapons, omni-tools, etc., until after we complete the ascent in order to maximize our chances of avoiding detection.

16:17 - Ascent to top of mountain completed without incident or detection thanks to unit's specialized training. The team is currently briefly recuperating behind some rocks near the edge of the cliff wall. Specialist Solus is regaling team with anecdote about the time he observed Commander Shepard push an Eclipse merc through the window of an Illium building from a great height.

16:46 - Team ordered to power-up weapons, omni-tools and engage stealth cloaks. Myself and Agent Rentola hack locking mechanism for artillery complex's outer access door. Sniper Specialist Waylak dispatches batarian guard inside building before he can report access door's opening. Guard's body dragged outside, tossed over cliff side. Team infiltrates complex using STG cloaks.

16:51 - Omni-tool scans find junction for artillery complex's ventilation system. Team ordered to employ breathing masks. Specialist Solus deploys toxin designed for batarian physiology into complex's air system.

17:02 - Batarian crew observed retching, other reactions consistent with nausea. Several descend to bottom level barracks, evidently home to location's infirmary. Using distraction causing by crew's reaction and STG cloaks, team reaches complex's top level command center. Four batarians in breathing masks observed manning center. Operatives Waylak, Hishau, Imness and Shenok are assigned to mount the defenses to the center's entrance. Myself, Specialist Solus and Operatives Rentola, Ruugar and Tolan ambush the batarians.

17:06 - Remaining batarian crew neutralized. Barricade team reports first lines of defense near stairwells established, working on secondary lines.

17:09 - Operative Rentola hacks complex's communications network, confirms batarian crew dealing with widespread sickness. Batarians suspect illness caused by last night's supper. Operatives Ruugar & Tolan begin hacking targeting systems for cannon.

17:13 - Operative Waylak reports that secondary barricade defenses are established at the command center door and the elevator power has been cut. Using batarian communications system, I send separate messages to batarian dreadnoughts announcing medical emergency at cannon site. I request evacuation of stricken personnel and replacements for cannon crew.

17:15 - Separate responses from Dreadnoughts Cholis and Wuursbat acknowledge message, advise they are on course to the cannon to conduct medical evacuation. Cholis approaching from west. Wuursbat from southeast.

[Note: The following reports for time period 17:16-32 reconstructed after mission using members' audio recordings. Fast-evolving nature of mission did not allow time for contemporaneous reports.]

17:16 - Operatives Ruugar & Tolan advise that cannon operating system access has secondary code-lock using rotating encryption algorithm. Specialist Solus ordered to assist in cracking code.

17:18 - Scanners confirm dreadnoughts inbound to cannon complex with ETA of 10 minutes. Solus, Ruugar & Tolan report no progress in breaking encryption and getting control of cannon operating system.

17:19 - Batarian officer at barracks reports into command center, states crew showing signs of rapid recovery. Announces relief crew on its way to command complex to allow present crew to receive treatment. Posing as officer in charge, I advise that the relief crew is unnecessary.

17:20 - Dreadnoughts now reported to be 8 minutes out. Solus, Ruugar & Tolan report no further progress in breaking encryption.

17:21 - Batarian officer at barracks requests identity of officer in charge at command center. Attempt to read identification tags on body of suspected top batarian officer killed in ambush impossible due to plasma burns on corpse. When unable to respond to officer's inquiry, batarians at cannon site sound red alert.

17:23 - Dreadnoughts now reported to be 5 minutes out. Solus, Ruugar & Tolan report still no progress in breaking control encryption. Shenok reports sounds of batarians in stairwells. I take position alongside barricade team.

17:24 - Dreadnoughts now reported to be 4 minutes out. Batarian troops surge through stairwells. STG barricade team opens fire, killing or severely injuring most of first wave attempting to storm command center. Operative Hishau injured by batarian fire.

17:25 - Dreadnoughts now reported to be 3 minutes out. Second wave of batarians hunker down in stairwells, exchange fire with barricade team. Operative Tolan reports success in cracking algorithm, cannon now powering up. I order barricade team to fall back to secondary defense line.

17:27 - Dreadnoughts now within visual range. Operative Ruugar joins barricade team while Specialist Solus applies first aid to Operative Hishau. Operative Rentola reports cannon targeting system online. Forcefield systems at secondary defense line activated. Heavy fire outside secondary defense line indicates hidden automated turrets behind first line of defense have been activated and are neutralizing batarians surging towards secondary line of defense.

17:28 - Operative Waylak reports batarians have retreated back to stairwell and are attempting to use grenades to disable automated turrets. Dreadnought Cholis' commander sends message to cannon command center, inquires why both dreadnoughts were summoned to evacuate stricken personnel. Operative Rentola reports cannon powered up and targeting system locked onto Dreadnought Cholis' mass effect core. I order Rentola to fire.

17:29 - Direct hit on Cholis observed. Rentola ordered to adjust for Cholis' altered trajectory, fire at same spot on dreadnought. Batarian ship hit a second time and its mass effect core containment is lost. The ship explodes and disintegrates. Dreadnought Wuursbat activates shields and adjusts trajectory, starts heading towards planet's outer atmosphere.

17:30 - Wuursbat's new trajectory causes momentum loss as ship begins turn. Cannon tracking systems switched to new target. Rentola ordered to fire at will. Third hit breaks dreadnought shielding. The fourth and fifth shots shear through the ship's hull. Dreadnought halts its ascent and begins falling back to planet.

17:31 - Rentola ordered to cease fire, set cannon mass effect core to overload instead. Specialist Solus reports Hishau able to move under his own power. Waylak reports that batarians pinned in stairwells have destroyed all but one turret.

17:32 - I order command center evacuated. Center's western observation window shattered through concentrated rifle fire by infiltration team. Members exit through window, activate individual mass effect anti-gravity generators to slow descent from mountain to floor below.

17:36 - Dreadnought Wuursbat observed crashing on planet surface approximately 10 kilometers from cannon site. Cannon's mass effect generators observed exploding, destroying complex. With cannon site sensors destroyed, I can now radio STG's planet outpost for shuttle pickup.

17:45 - While waiting for shuttle, feral varren observed emerging from undergrowth. Specialist Solus reports no further varren pacification measures remain. About to order team to fire on beast when animal spots Operative Rentola and then rolls over onto it's back, exposing belly. Operative Rentola begins rubbing varren's belly, requests permission to take beast onboard shuttle. His request is seconded by several other 3rd Infiltration Regiment members.

17:50 - STG shuttle arrives. I allow varren to come aboard with team, warn Operative Rentola he is now personally responsible for the beast.

Summary of Operation 1812: Mission successful. All three targets terminated with no evidence of Special Tasks Group's involvement. One injury, no casualties. Commendations recommended for all team members. - Major Kirrahe, 3rd Infiltration Regiment, Special Tasks Group.


[Public Information] Extranet footage of explosion on Mala'Nak - The footage was uploaded by a salarian civilian on the Mala'Nak colony Heranon who repurposed a stargazing telescope to watch the gun battery. The footage shows the cannon activating and firing on the batarian dreadnoughts and tracking the second ship as it tries to change course before the cannon destroys the second ship. The cannon then itself explodes spectacularly.


[Public Information] Citadel Newsnet - The Batarian Hegemony today demanded that the Council investigate recent incidents on the disputed planet of Mala'Nak. The Salarian Union has refused to relocate its colonies there despite conceding that the planet was once the site of batarian colonies. The salarians have contended that the batarians abandoned any claims to Mala'Nak after pollution rendered it uninhabitable for centuries. They claim that the batarians only want the planet back now that salarian technology has reversed the ecological damage. The batarians have called this 'a grievous insult to the Hegemony and its people.'

The batarians dispatched a pair of dreadnoughts to the planet last month to press their claim. The dreadnoughts' engineers built a major gun battery on the planet surface within range of the main salarian colony. However, the battery inexplicably fired on the batarians' own ships, wiping them out before the guns' own mass effect core overloaded and exploded. The Batarian Hegemony has alleged sabotage but the Salarian Union has denied having any hand in "what was clearly faulty work by the hegemony's engineers."

A Salarian Union source told Citadel Newsnet that it would continue to "hold the line" on Mala'Nak. - Emily Wong reporting.


[Secret Data] Report from STG Specialist Mordin Solus regarding anti-batarian bioweapon B-790 - The compound used in Operation 1812 was easily transmitted through the ventilation system. Successful at inducing nausea in the batarians at the site. Effects were not severe enough to incapacitate them for prolonged period, however, resulting in faster than expected response by location's guards.

Unexpected side-effect of compound: a marked increase in flatulence among batarians. The sounds and smells immediately noticeable. They served as low-tech emergency warning system that batarians were nearby. May have been crucial in infiltration team's ability to mount rapid response when the batarians attempted to storm cannon command center. Request STG provide funding to create more explosive variant of compound with more powerful olfactory effects.


[Public Information] Citadel Newsnet - The Salarian Union announced today that it would rebuild the batarian-made gun battery on the disputed planet of Mala'Nak that seemingly malfunctioned and overloaded recently, destroying itself and two Batarian Hegemony dreadnoughts in the process. The hegemony had insisted that the gun battery was a memorial to a conflict centuries ago when batarians had colonized Mala'Nak. The Salarian Union had previously disputed that was the purpose of the gun battery and demanded that it be dismantled. Dalatrass Linron said that as a goodwill gesture to the Batarian Hegemony, the union has reconsidered its position on the memorial and salarian engineers were nearly finished building an exact duplicate on the same location. "There has been too much suspicion and distrust between our peoples. We salarians hope that by rebuilding the memorial we can honor the batarian colonists and make clear to the hegemony that we are ready to welcome them to our planet if they care to visit." Linron said there were plans to build other memorials elsewhere on the planet. - Emily Wong reporting.


Liara leaned back in her chair and smiled as she finished her tea. "Glyph, provide the following message to the Batarian Hegemony: 'Having searched the available databases, the Shadow Broker cannot report having any relevant, non-public information about the incident at Mala'Nak. Therefore there is no business that we can conduct in this area.'"

"At once," Glyph replied. "Message sent."

Chapter 2: The UFO Conspiracy

Summary:

Journalist Emily Wong makes a startling historical discovery: The aliens that some humans reported getting abducted by from the 1950s onward may have been salarians! But what where the salarians doing on Earth back then and why? Wong vows to uncover the truth. A one-shot comedic short story.

Chapter Text

"Yes, what is on your mind, Emily?" asked Arulus Vikellius in response to the rap on his office door. Citadel Newsnet's editor-in-chief asked the question without bothering to look up from the story he was currently copy-editing. Emily Wong was the only reporter on his staff who would casually stride into his office for an impromptu meeting like this. It was his own fault really, the turian mused. When he had told the publication's staff that he had an "open door policy," he hadn't anticipated that any of his reporters would take him literally. His usually-grouchy demeanor ensured that most of the outlet's journalists never bothered to test the assertion - and that was just the way he liked things.

Emily Wong was the lone exception. The human popped into his office 2-3 times a week to pitch him story ideas. She would bound in, explain what she proposed for her next assignment in a few breathless sentences and just as quickly scurry back out to begin work on the story, taking it as a given that her boss had okayed the idea. It was an annoying practice, with the most irritating part being that they were usually good ideas that Vikellius knew would draw in listeners. So he usually let Wong do as she pleased. It was the easiest way to deal with her irritating enthusiasm.

"Boss, get this: I think I have a lead on my biggest story yet! I'm talking galactic-level stuff" the human exclaimed. "Have you ever heard of the term 'Ufology'?!"

"You effed off who now?" the puzzled turian asked as he spun himself around in his chair to face Wong.

"Ufology," Wong repeated. "It's an old Earth term, first coined over 200 years ago. It's based on the acronym 'Unidentified Flying Objects' - the term the Earth militaries of the time gave to unknown airborne phenomena. The things pilots saw in the skies alongside them but that they couldn't, well, identify. There were numerous such sightings, all unexplained."

Vikellius shook his head, still confused. "How is something well over two centuries old relevant news?"

Wong beamed. "Because I think I've finally solved what was happening with those sightings!" She took an antique paper-and-ink book out of a bag she was carrying and handed it to the editor. He glanced at the tattered cover and saw a colorful image of a glowing saucer-shaped object. The wording next to it was impenetrable to the turian, Vikellius never having bothered to study Earth languages.

"What is this?" he asked.

"It's a book titled 'Flying Saucers: Fact or Fiction?' published in the Earth year of 1975! There were a ton of similar books that came out on Earth in the latter half of the 20th century! I found a few of them in storage at the Wong family home in California," the reporter excitedly remarked. "At the time, humanity was just making its first tentative steps towards spaceflight. Discovering mass effect energy was still more than a century into the future. But that period of history was the first time that humans thought seriously about the possibility of life on other planets. There was a lot of wild speculation that the UFOs, - also called 'flying saucers' on account of them often being round in shape - were actually alien ships visiting Earth and that beings from elsewhere in the galaxy had had limited contact with humanity! Most humans discounted these ideas. But not all."

Vikellius casually flipped through the book and sighed. "I still don't see the point of this, Emily. So your people were speculating about alien life long before they actually met any non-human sapients. So...? I'm sure if you looked back at my species in its pre-spaceflight era you'd find similar speculation about what life on other planets might be like."

Wong beamed a triumphant grin. "My people may not have been speculating. Check this out!" she declared as she guided the editor to a particular page and pointed to an sketched illustration on it.

Vikellius' mandibles flared as he gazed at the page. The drawing, while crude, showed a non-human biped with a triangular head, large, dark oval-shaped eyes and just three fingers on its hand. The resulting image was unmistakable. "That's a salarian, isn't it? When did you say this book came out?"

Wong's grin grew wider. "1975! The book is well over two centuries old!"

The turian shut it and handed it back to Wong. "This 'book' has to be a hoax then. Your species only had its first contact with any Council races four decades ago."

The human shook her head. "I'm telling you, boss, the book isn't a hoax. As I said, I found it in storage at my family home on Earth - tucked away in a forgotten part of an attic like it was a time capsule. The picture inside it that I showed you was the author's depiction of the aliens he claimed to have encountered. Look, I have other books like it!" She reached into a bag and pulled out three other tattered, dusty volumes. "This one is titled 'Aliens Among Us!' And here's a memoir titled, 'Probed and Prodded: The True Story of My Alien Abduction'! and here's one called 'The Truth At Last: Aliens and McDonald's Secret Sauce.' And I have one more back at my desk!"

One by one, Wong presented the books to her editor, taking care to open each one to a particular page with an illustration. Each one showed a different artist's drawing of the aliens the various authors alleged they had encountered. The pictures varied in quality but in each case the drawings plainly resembled salarians.

"Spirits! Those devious little pyjacks," exclaimed Vikellius. "Somehow they must have been visiting your sector in its pre-space flight days! But how did they manage that before your system's mass effect relay was made fully operational?" he wondered aloud, scratching his mandibles as he talked.

Wong shrugged. "They're smart. They must have figured some alternate method of transit. But who cares how precisely they did it?!" she declared, growing even more excited and animated as she spoke. "The important thing is we have proof they were interfering with the development of a pre-spaceflight race - and keeping the rest of the Council in the dark about it! This is huge news! Potentially historic, even!"

Vikellius raised a single finger talon. "Evidence. Not proof," the turian solemnly intoned. "I agree that you are onto something potentially big, Emily. Interference in a pre-spaceflight species' development is a major violation of Council rules - and by a Council member! But we need more than musty old Earth artifacts to prove this. We need something salarian - internal documents, classified mission reports, etc. - that corroborates your theory. Then - and only then - do we have a story."

Wong beamed. "You know me, boss! I'll poke and pester the salarians until they give in and provide me with the proof this story needs!"

The editor chuckled. While Vikellius admired the human's spirit, he knew from experience that salarians were especially protective of their state secrets. Wong's efforts therefore would probably be in vain. But it would also probably be a good long while before Wong gave up on the story. That meant a nice extended period of him not being bothered in his office by the boundlessly energetic human.

"Go for it, Emily," Vikellius announced. "This publication is behind you 100%."


"Thank you contacting the Salarian Union Interstellar Exploration Archives. If you want to know the archive's hours of operation, press #1 to be told that we are not currently open to the public. For a schedule of upcoming events, press #2 to be told we have no upcoming events. To request a private viewing of specific materials, press #3 to be told you lack proper security clearance. To make an inquiry or leave a comment, press #4, wait for the chime and then leave your name and state the matter in as concise a manner as possible. We will proceed to ignore your comments or requests at our earliest opportunity. Thank you again for contacting the Salarian Union Interstellar Exploration Archives and, please, have a pleasant day."

"Grrr..." grumbled Emily as she switched off the communication device. She had anticipated that getting the salarian evidence she needed would be tough, but even she was surprised at how little access they gave the general public. Attempt after attempt by her to gain access through official channels to some database that might have shed light on whether the salarians had visited Earth in the mid-twentieth century had been rebuffed. Sometimes the salarians were polite about it. Sometimes they were curt. But in each case the "No!" was immediate and firm.

'Well, if they won't officially let me in, I'll just have to find another way,' the reporter thought. 'I'm not happy about what I am about to do, but needs must.' She turned the communications device back on and said, "VI, connect me to Citadel Security's cyber security division. I need to talk to Officer Quetzal."


The location Emily Wong's source had specified for the rendezvous was a dingy cafe in the wards. The establishment was open around the clock and, but for the presence of non-human customers, could have been a diner in the downtown area of a major Earth city: simple white seats, tables and walls, the smell of strong coffee in the air and even a pie displayed on the counter under a glass cover.

Wong was already on her third cup of coffee when she saw an odd-looking salarian enter the establishment. The salarian was wearing a dark-colored human fedora-style hat. It was a size too large and didn't properly fit him due to his cranial horns. The salarian was also wearing a coat with an upturned collar and sported dark-shaded eye coverings. Too dark, apparently, as the salarian walked directly into an exiting asari customer, then into the side of one of the cafe's booths, then into a stool by the counter, before again correcting himself and walking over to Emily Wong's booth.

"Officer Quetzal, I presume?" the reporter asked as the salarian took the spot opposite her. "Good to finally meet you in pers-"

"Shhhhhh..." muttered the salarian as he surreptitiously scoped out the other customers in the cafe. "We must be certain we are not being observed first..."

As the salarian quietly contemplated the others the cafe's human waitress approached Wong's table and said, "Usual Quet?" while placing a beverage in front of him.

"Not today, Glenda," the salarian replied. "This time I think I'll just try a slice of that pie on the counter."

"Gotcha," the human muttered and walked away.

Now confident he had eluded any would-be observers the salarian turned to the reporter and whispered, "What you asked for was a very tall order, human."

"But you did obtain it?" Wong replied, adopting a similarly hushed tone.

"Of course, I did! You are talking to the galaxy's greatest hacker!" Quetzal boasted. "There is no security lock I cannot crack. No encryption I cannot decypher. This was nevertheless a difficult assignment for me, human! Whatever you may think of me, I assure you that I am a proud citizen of the Salarian Union! Revealing its secrets to an outsider will gnaw away at my conscience for years to come! So you had better have the payment we agreed upon!"

Wong nodded and pulled up her omni-tool. "Yes, three cases of Eden Prime popcorn. Here's the voucher for them from Morlan's Famous Shoppe" she declared as she pushed the "send" button.

"Excellent!" Quetzal replied. He reached into his coat and pulled out a computer disc. "And here is the data module with the information you requested. Not sure what's so special about the records of intergalactic scientific expeditions from long before either one of us was born, but here you go." As he completed the handover, the cafe owner placed a slice of pie in front of him. Quetzal grabbed a fork and took a bite, then broke into a wide grin. "Delicious!" he declared. "I'm not familiar with this type of Earth dessert, human. What kind of insects are these?"

Wong tucked the data disc into a special pocket sewn into her dress. "Those aren't bugs. They're nuts. Pecans, to be precise. Getting back to our business: You're certain you were able to get the data undetected?"

Quetzal finished swallowing a bite of pie. "Undetected? No. That, I'm afraid, isn't possible. The archive's security system raises an alert anytime it is accessed and that system cannot be disabled remotely. So the Salarian Union must by now know that an unauthorized individual got into the archives. However I used a public extranet cafe terminal to do the hacking and was I extremely fastidious about not leaving anything on the terminal that would trace the hack back to me. In short, they know the data was looked at, but they have no way of knowing who did it."

Wong nodded and signaled to Glenda to prepare her check. "Then I've got to finish writing my story quick! Goodbye!"


Emily Wong had only just stepped inside her apartment and was reaching to flip on the lights when she became aware that there were others in the darkened room. A neural shock immediately followed and Wong was soon engulfed in an even more complete darkness. When she groggily awoke, she found herself seated in a chair in the apartment's main room, surrounded by four salarians in body armor. One of them she immediately recognized.

"Major Kirrahe?" Wong muttered.

"Yes, hello! Good to see you again, Emily!" the Special Tasks Group agent remarked, flashing a genuine smile. "How is my favorite recipient of official leaks from the STG? It's been too long! Alas, I wish the current circumstances were different."

"Why, what are you and, I presume, these other STG agents doing here?" Wong cautiously replied.

Kirrahe sighed. "There's no point in being coy, Emily. We know that you have discovered the STG's secret missions to Earth two centuries ago. We cannot allow you to make this knowledge public. So we are here to prevent that from happening." Kirrahe spotted Wong's body tensing up at the news. The salarian adopted a more soothing tone in reaction. "Relax, we have no plans to harm you. In fact, I volunteered for this assignment to ensure that that would be the case. But we *are* going to have to destroy all of the evidence you found and wipe your memory of your own investigation. Sorry, but there is just no other way."

The STG officer pointed to a salarian seated at Wong's personal computer. "My colleague has already purged this computer and your office one of all relevant data. We've conducted a thorough search of the rest of your apartment. We found the old Earth books that I assume got you started on this project and we incinerated them. And now I'm going to destroy the data disc you bought from Quetzal." Kirrahe held up the device in his hand. The STG officer brought up his omni-tool and in a flash, the disc was reduced to dust.

Wong grumbled and hung her head. "If you're going to wipe my memory anyway can you at least answer some questions now?"

"Hmm, I don't see the harm in that," Kirrahe answered, pulling up a chair and seating himself opposite Wong. "Ask away."

"How did you find out that I was working on this story?" the human inquired. "Quetzal assured me the hack couldn't be traced back to him."

Kirrahe chuckled. "Well, first off, Quetzal is always on our shortlist of suspects whenever something is hacked. To be fair to him, he wasn't lying when told you there was no way to trace the hack itself to him specifically. He left no 'digital DNA traces,' so to speak, on either the archives or the terminal he used to hack them. But we were able to trace the hack to a public extranet cafe here on the Citadel. So we asked the owner who had rented that particular terminal that day and he told us. Quetzal apparently frequents that cafe because they offer discounted rates to C-Sec officers and he had to present his Citadel Security ID to get it. Also, he left a food court tray near the terminal he used and the vendor he purchased a sandwich from prints the customer's name in large letters on all of the sandwich wrappers. I guess that's to ensure that they get served to the correct person. It was a pretty clear clue when we spotted it. And once we knew Quetzal was the hacker, we monitored him until he met with his client: you."

The reporter shook her head and muttered what Kirrahe presumed was an Earth language curse word under her breath. "Why were salarian scientists secretly studying humans in the first place?" she asked. "And how did they get to the Earth's solar system?"

The major shrugged. "Your species was being evaluated to see if you were suitable candidates for uplift - that is, jump-starting your development by providing you with advanced technology. The scientific process of studying humanity took a while - you are quite a complex species. Ultimately the STG's experts decided against it. Humans were deemed too far along in their own technological development. Better to let your species discover intergalactic spaceflight on its own, it was thought. As to how those scientists and researchers got into your solar system, well, that's beyond even my security clearance."

Kirrahe smiled and continued, "I'll let you have one last question, Emily. Then I'm afraid that Agent Wiks here is going to have to go ahead with the memory wipe."

The reporter mulled that over for a second. "Okay, then I guess I have to ask this: What was the deal with all of the anal probing of human abductees that your scientists were doing? Nearly every account of an alien abduction claims that the humans got some sort of device shoved up their backside. What could you have possibly been trying to learn from doing that?"

"Ahh, yes. *That*. Well, umm..." stammered Kirrahe in response. "The thing you have to understand, Emily, is that these were our first contacts with your species and while we learned how to translate human languages fairly early, many of the nuances of those languages took longer to be fully understood. Even today we salarians have trouble with certain human idioms and figures of speech. What I mean by all that is, there was an instance early in the Earth project where some scientists were remotely observing a human couple seemingly beginning a mating ritual at a secluded spot. The female abruptly forced the male to stop and told him in an accusatory tone, "Your brain is in your pants." The scientists translated this rather too literally and assumed from it that humans must possess a secondary brain somewhere in their body's pelvic region. Many scientists quickly adopted this theory because it would have explained many of the peculiarities relating to human mating practices."

"A 'second brain'? Seriously?" Wong asked incredulously.

"As I said, we were still learning about your species," Kirrahe rather testily retorted. "Salarian scientists tend to be competitive types and soon there was a race among them to be the first to find and fully study this 'second brain.' Probing the humans' rectal cavities was logically the best way to search their anatomy in that region. So the STG scientists did exactly that. Of course, your species doesn't have a secondary brain, so the researchers never found anything. But salarian scientists are also persistent individuals who are prone to redoubling their efforts rather than conceding defeat. So the probing continued well after it should have been clear that there was nothing to find. It was pretty embarrassing for everyone involved when they eventually realized the mistake."

"Salarian scientists abducted and anally probed random humans for decades based on a single mistranslation?!" a stunned Wong sputtered.

"Yes, well, of course it is going to sound rather foolish if you put it that way," Kirrahe conceded. "But I trust you understand better now why we don't want any of this to come to light." The major stood up out of his chair and motioned to another salarian, who began preparing a doctor's injector. "You were determined to get to the bottom of things, Emily. So were those salarian scientists. But sometimes the effort just isn't worth the result. We found that out the hard way. And your people paid the price. Let's leave this whole matter in the past, shall we?"

The other salarian placed the injector to the reporter's neck. "Before I do this, I just want say: Huge fan of your work, Miss Wong," the STG agent declared, then pressed the injector's trigger. A moment later the world went dark for Emily Wong.


Reporter Khalisah Bint Sinan al-Jilani drummed her fingers along the Presidium cafe countertop as she finished editing a short news story on her omni-tool. She looked up and spotted rival reporter Emily Wong walking along the nearby thoroughfare. This prompted al-jilani to look back down at the story on her omni-tool even though she had finished with it. 'Just look as inconspicuous as possible and maybe Wong won't spot me,' al-Jilani thought.

The effort was for naught. "Hi Khalisah! Saw you sitting over here by yourself! Mind if I join you?" Wong asked, then plunked herself down in a seat opposite al-Jilani before the other human could respond. "Working on anything good?"

"Maybe... Waiting to hear from my editor," al-Jilani cautiously replied. "What, uhh, about you?"

Wong shrugged. "Nothing at present. I must have gone out last night and had a few too many cocktails. Woke up this morning feeling kind of groggy and my memories of last night are really fuzzy."

"Oh," al-Jilani muttered, unsure what level of interest, if any, she should feign in having a conversation with Wong. Her eyes were soon caught by something she spotted in a tote bag Wong was carrying. "Hey, is that an antique 'dead tree' book? Rarely see those nowadays."

Wong reached into the bag and pulled the book out. "This? Yeah, found it in my desk this morning. Can't seem to recall when I must have gotten it. Tried to give it a read earlier, but for some reason I just couldn't get into it."

"I'm kind of a sucker for those antiques," al-Jilani declared. "If you're not reading it, may I borrow it?"

"Borrow it? You can keep it!" Wong announced and handed it over.

Khalisah examined the cover. "Hmm, 'The Secret History of UFOs.' Thanks, Emily. This will make for great bedtime reading."

-The End-

[Special thanks to Magpie Corvidae for permission to use her OC Quetzal from her story, "Khalisah Bint Sinan al-Jilani, Westerlund News"]

Notes:

Special thanks to Lara Jayd for beta-reading this story.