Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Bobby

The wind was howling when we met so many years ago. Unfortunately it wasn’t the warmest of greetings. Even I felt chilled.

They came out of nowhere, twins of destruction and light. We weren’t a match, not to mention Logan was reluctant to pick a side, that’s why we fought. But those twins, with their sharp ears and cheek bones, piercing grey eyes, and raven black hair that gave an impression of iridescence in the moonlight.

They whipped up a blizzard that only Storm could control, but Storm did not come with us. By some sort of luck I was able to knock the male twin out of the spiral. I was surprised and impressed by my shot. I sent the boy hurtling like shrapnel and he hit the rocky and frozen face of mountainside. I swear I heard something crack, either bone or stone. I felt like apologizing and quickly changed out of my ice form.

He didn’t get up at first but he stirred and swayed heavily as he got up. There was a small trickle of blood from his mouth and another from the nose. He smiled and I knew I was doomed. It was a blood stained Cheshire smile but I couldn’t look away.

“Color me impressed, loutre pop…” he dabbed the blood on his face and stared at his stained fingers. That’s when I noticed how young he was, younger than me and I was already the youngest on the team. He was also beautiful. That wasn’t usually a word I’d assign to men (except maybe Warren when he’d grow out his hair). He was just as gorgeous as his twin, maybe even more so… I quickly tamped down that thought. How naive, I was.

“Northstar, Aurora, we’re moving out!” A man draped in red and white yelled for the twins.

“Au revoir, loutre pop.” The twin, I now knew as Northstar, said coyly. “Until we meet again.”
I couldn’t even put a word in before he was gone.

-

Now, years later, he’s standing feet away here, in my home, in the school. I tried to blend into the crowd, hoping he wouldn’t notice me. (If he even remembered me…. “loutre pop”).

He was mostly the same, he’d grown into his handsomely, beautiful features, stronger looking. Though with a more noticeable age in his eyes. Tire eyes.

I’d changed too. I was a scared kid back then who was crushing on his friend and teammate and writing it off as a one time fluke but then I met the mysterious twin. I knew deep down I was different. I’ve been out for a while now, always being pestered on who I’m dating. I’ve only ever wanted what I can’t have.

Now I wasn’t the only one who found him “dreamy.” The world knew him as Jean Paul Beaubier née Martin. A skilled acrobat and ruthless competitive skier… until he was outed. First as gay, then as a mutant. He lost all his accolades and sponsors as fast as he could run. It didn’t completely destroy his drive though. Now there was the Northstar Children’s League. It’s a charity for underprivileged kids to express themselves through sports. Really noble. But he still remained an enigma. It only served to make me more nervous and gave me further fear of being attracted to someone so unattainable.

The Professor introduced Jean Paul as a new instructor at the school, for math (of course he’s also good at math). The girls were all flustered around him, the boys maybe too beneath their jealousy and fragile masculinity.

He declined making any sort of statement beyond that he was happy to be here to try something new and exciting (as if math is exciting).

The crowd dispersed but a gaggle of girls followed Jean Paul like a clowder of feral cats. I tried to hurry myself away, but I made the mistake of locking eyes with him. Steely grey.

“Loutre Pop? Is that you?” He grinned.
“Uh…” I felt my cheeks get hot as he approached. I tried to subtly use my powers to cool them.

“Yeah, it’s been a while.” I said shyly, letting my head fall. I had actually looked up “loutre pop,” when we returned from that mission. “Otter Pop.”

“How have you been, I mean I’ve certainly read the exploits of your team but I didn’t think you’d be here. Yet here you all, in the flesh.” His voice was both firm and fluid. I liked the undefinable accent it carried. If I was ice I’d melt into a puddle.

“Fortunately, neither of us are covered in blood.” He laughed. Infectious.
“I am sorry about that.” I rubbed the back of my neck.
“Non, there is no need for apologies.” He place a cool hand on my shoulder. It turned into a branding iron.

“Okay, cool.” I said nervously. He looked away.
“The Professor wants to talk with me, until next time, loutre pop.” He smiled and was instantly gone.

Where his hand had been, felt like a blister.

Uh oh.

Chapter Text

Jean Paul

I should have been upset, but I was impressed. I was at the top of my game, taking on the elite X-Men, barely 20 and winning. Should’ve known better than to pick on the one you think will be the easiest to beat. It’s like underestimating the quiet.

I remember flying and then suddenly I was slamming into the frozen stone. It was like an electric shock, a restart of a computer. Black for a second. But I came alive again with my mouth tasting of metal.

I felt something warm trickle over my lips, I touched the wind chapped skin above my lips and it came back red, or really more black in the moonlight. I looked to see my assailant frozen in his spot except he was no longer made of ice like earlier. He’d melted. This withdrew my initial anger. My ears were ringing so I could only see him mouth the word, “sorry.”

I couldn’t be angry with those baby blues.

My smile felt crooked on my face. Years without smiling can do that to you.

“Color me impress, loutre pop…” my words felt like cotton in my bloody mouth. He looked so damn distraught. I felt a twinge of pity. He was young, younger than the rest of the mighty X-men. This was a status we both shared in our respective groups.

My nickname for him stemmed from the cheap popsicles given to me as a child in the foster care home. Otter Pops. They were just watery syrup in sharp plastic tubes that cut the edges of your mouth, but they were a treat nonetheless.

Once my hearing returned I could hear James calling for my new (long-lost) sister and I.

“Au revoir, loutre pop.” I darted.

Normally my heart wouldn’t pound after a sprint but it felt heavy in my chest. Baby blue Otter Pop.

-

At first I laughed at Charles and Jean as they offered me a role at their school for the gifted. Me, of all people (of all mutants) was not an obvious choice for a teammate or worse yet a teacher.

But I did concede that the last year had been awful. Now the World really knew me, or the me they wanted to hate, mutant, gay, take your pick. I lost the small fortune I’d acquired between sports sponsors and performing houses, what I had left I used to start the charity that was meant to come during my retirement.

Retirement came early and against my will, much like everything else in my life. Orphaning, stealing, protesting, touching, loving….

But Grey and Xavier called my bluff, a challenge really. A chance to choose a new adventure. I’d both give and take from this endeavor. That is what I was missing during my pseudo imprisonment by Department H. Of course Xavier made joining his X-men optional. He must’ve heard of my antics during my Alpha Flight tenure. Deep down I knew it wasn’t really optional, how is anything option with telepaths around?

I wanted to ask him what came about the boy with the baby blues, but my blood pressure rose at the thought of it. I’d seen him in op-eds in the tasteless gay magazines and long ago in the newspapers along with the other X-men, but he’d since faded from the spotlight. I was jealous of that, that he could just hide from the light.

But the strangest thing happened, I saw him. Otter pop, baby blue, Robert Drake, Iceman and X-men. He was a ghost of his former self. He was older, more defined. Hardened features like Michelangelo’s portraits and statues. Now I knew this crush wasn’t over me.

I knew he was trying to hide within the school children and instructors, but me, in an attempt to seem bold, went after him. (I felt bad brushing off the schoolgirls who hounded me, I mean they had to know I was not interested).

“Loutre pop? Is that you?” I kept my composure. I wanted to corner him, dominate the narrative, tell him that I hadn’t forget him. He was so much more remarkable up close. Icy baby blue.

“Uh,” he stumbled.

Please tell me he hasn’t forgotten.

“Yeah. It’s been awhile.” He finally spoke in a full sentence. His voice was evenly deep and soft. His cheeks flushed pink before cooling again.

“How have you been, I mean I’ve certainly read the exploits of your team but I didn’t think you’d be here. Yet here you all, in the flesh.” So much flesh indeed. Muscular and toned. If only I could reach out…

“Fortunately, neither of us are covered in blood.” I continued, finishing with a pointed chuckle.

“I’m sorry about that.” He rubbed his neck, a nervous tick that allowed him to flex those muscles.

“Non, there’s no need for apologies.” I said.

All is forgiven.

I placed a placating hand on that firm shoulder. He cool to the touch.

“Okay, cool.” He said.
“Jean Paul, will you come to my office?” I heard Xavier’s voice echoing in my mind. It made me angry deep down.

“The Professor wants to talk with me, until next time, loutre pop.” I sighed before squeezing his shoulder. I darted, feeling vaguely flustered.

Merde.

Chapter Text

Bobby didn’t think he’d have heart palpitations in the teachers lounge but here he was at lunch no less. Picking apart a napkin what started as the usual coffee break became something more… or maybe Bobby was just reading too much into it…

He came in and was relieved that the lounge was mostly empty suffice for Kitty and Logan (he was teaching her solitaire) and that there was still coffee in the coffee pot.

Bobby gave them a nod and hurried to the coffee pot, as he reached for the handle, he felt something like an electric shock and quickly withdrew his hand. Like he just stuck a fork in a power outlet.

“Oh mon Dieu! Forgive me!” It was Jean Paul, he’d somehow miscalculated his speed and my sheer improbability, his hand careened with Bobby’s as they reached for the pot.

“Oh my God, shit, sorry.” Bobby stammered, holding his hand out, like he was examining it for burns.

“No, the grievance is mine, I didn’t even see you til it was too late…” Jean Paul tried to meet Bobby’s stunned gaze, but Bobby kept averting his eyes.

Logan and Kitty exchanged a glance. Kitty rolled her eyes.

“It’s fine, here, go ahead.” Bobby motioned to the pot.
“Non, you can as my apology.” Jean Paul gestured.

Bobby shrugged, not wanting to drag on the conversation, his cheeks already felt a degree warmer. Under watch he poured the coffee into a drinking glass instead of mug. He had to concentrate as to not shake as he did so. The ice he added to the cup had more cracks than usual.

“I should have guessed you’d prefer it iced.” Jean Paul chuckled for a minute.
“Oh, yeah…” Bobby stammered again.
“I prefer espresso iced.” Jean Paul stated, but there was a tilt in his voice. Nerves.

“Oh yeah?” Bobby felt like this was absolutely a flirt, it had to be…

“Yes, may I?” Jean Paul held out his hand. “The pot?”

Bobby was still gripping the pot, debating on if he should chill the contents as a signal, or if he should explore the concept of iced espresso. Was that an invitation. He shook his head and handed over the pot. Chicken, he thought.

“Merci, loutre pop.” Jean Paul smiled and filled a mug before walking purposefully out of the room. Bobby’s cheeks turned bright red.

“Smooth.” Kitty snorted.
“You’re lucky your hand ain’t broke, kid.” Logan jeered too. “At that speed it can be like a bullet.”
“Aw, but he wouldn’t want to hurt the precious Loutre Pop.” Kitty elbowed Logan.

“You guys suck.” Bobby snapped. His cheeks we now red from embarrassment.

“I’m only joking.” Kitty’s voice returned to normal. “Your crush is obvious though.”
“How—“ Bobby went to speak but fell silent. “Just cause I’m gay and he’s gay doesn’t mean we need to get together ya know?” Bobby grew defensive.

“No one’s saying that, Bobby.” Kitty said. “And he’s being obvious too.”

“So that was flirting?” Bobby asked, both relieved and anxious.

“I’d say telling you he likes things iced is flirty, definitely.” Kitty started picking up the playing cards. “So flirt back next time, Otter Pop.”

So there’s a chance.

——

Jean Paul’s purposeful stride turned into a hurried and awkward walk back to the still empty classroom. Nerves overtaking.

With no one watching he slumped against the closed door. He didn’t feel like drinking the coffee he was holding now.

“Iced espresso?” He whispered. “Why didn’t I say iced coffee? Iced latte?” He let his head hit the stained wood door.

“Pull yourself together.” He stood back up. “And stop talking to yourself.”

——

Bobby had half a mind to just take his dinner back to his room and try to sweat out this undeniable crush. But he knew he wouldn’t hear the end of it from Kitty.

So now he was in the dining room with Kitty, By his side and Jean Paul on the other side of the room. They locked eyes for a moment before Jean Paul looked away, so unbothered.

Bobby nearly froze up when he saw Jean Paul get up and start to walk towards him, that same purposeful walk.

“Robert, I’m sorry about earlier, sincerely. I was wondering if you’d like to accompany on a walk after supper?” His voice was fluid and firm. “It’s still light out.”

Why would it matter if it’s light out?

“Uh, sure I guess.” Bobby squirmed.
“Excellent.” Jean Paul smirked before striding away.

“Did he just ask you out? Cuz I thought the iced espresso thing was definitely a signal for you to act first?” Kitty nudged Bobby.
“What have I gotten myself into?” Bobby buried his face into his hands.

——

The sun was low in the sky which cast everything in pinks, yellows, and oranges. It was still almost uncomfortably hot for the start of the school year. August. Earlier than most, therefore the heat still remained.

Jean Paul was leaning against the old Xavier grandfather oak. Bobby marveled at how Jean Paul still managed to wear long sleeves in such weather, what was he hiding? It made Bobby feel almost undressed in his tee and shorts.

“Hi, can I just ask why? Why does making things up to me matter?” Bobby came out and said it.

“Getting to the point I see?” Jean Paul sighed.
“I guess?”
“I just want us to work, let me rephrase, it order for us to work as a team. I think it’s be detrimental if there were still animosity between us.”

“Oh.” Bobby felt deflated. His heart was still in his throat. “Guess I should apologize for striking you before.”
“Oh, no need. I think my ego needed that, let’s walk.” Jean Paul patted his shoulder.

“How can you wear that? Like it’s 80 degrees.” Bobby joked.
“I don’t know, it’s terrible isn’t it? I don’t like showing skin I suppose.”

He hated being vulnerable.

They made small talk about the weather, about how obtuse Scott could be, and their shared appreciation for Kitty.

“I don’t know why you’d think there was any animosity between us?” Bobby used Jean Paul’s words. “I mean you don’t seem to be angry with me.”

“I thought maybe you were uncomfortable…” Jean Paul said softly.

They were far from the school and the sky was shifting to red and purple. The crickets has started their evening songs and soon there’d be fireflies in the shrubs.

“I—I’m not, I mean…” Bobby forgot to speak. Jean somehow managed to be ethereal beneath a sheen of sweat.
“It just seemed like you were.” Jean Paul didn’t want to point out the elephant in the room. “I had no ulterior motives for walking with you.”

The silence that followed filled both of them with hurt. Both unable to articulate what they wanted.

“I admire you, I like you, I just wanted you to like me too.” Jean Paul felt like a silly school girl. He hated the vulnerability and was ready to take off.

Bobby said nothing as they faced each other. Jean Paul was looking down to avoid eye contact.

“I—“ Bobby opened his mouth but closed it.
“It’s okay, you don’t have to say anything.” Jean Paul was seconds from running into the sea.

“Shut up,” Bobby half smiled before quickly grabbing Jean Paul’s cheeks and pressed their lips together.

“I’m making the first move, please kiss me back.” Bobby thought during the first stunned seconds of the kiss but after the initial shock, Jean Paul’s hands came up to hold his wrist and his cheek as well. Kissing back.

“See?” Bobby stepped back breathless. His lips still buzzing.
“I do.” Jean said quietly before abruptly speeding into the distant trees.

“Son of a bitch…” Bobby cursed himself. Now everything was ruined.