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Shuffle Challenge: Madam Secretary Edition

Summary:

The Madam Secretary addition to the shuffle challenge because this show is criminally underrated. Let's hope I can do these characters justice the way they deserve.

Chapter 1: "you were good to me" by Jeremy Zucker

Chapter Text

“Congratulations, Elizabeth, you truly deserve this.” Those words were probably the most sincere spoken in a politician’s office. As Nadine Tolliver stood in the Oval Office, she waited for the nostalgia to settle uncomfortably in her heart, but it never came. No, all she felt was pride for the woman before her. Once the fierce Secretary of State, Elizabeth McCord was now the President of the United States and wholly deserving of the title. Nadine would have been proud to work under this administration, but she felt no desire to return to politics or D.C. Her life was in California now. 

“I couldn’t have done it without the others, or you, for that matter.” Nadine did a double-take.

“Me?” 

“Yes,  you . Whenever things were going wrong, I would always ask myself, “What would Nadine do?” and suddenly the answer would come to me.” Elizabeth grinned from her new desk. “Plus, threatening to call you always got Mike to shut up for a few minutes.” Now that brought an entirely different emotion to the former Chief of Staff. 

Nadine had not seen Michael Barnow since their “break-up” before her resignation, which worked well enough for her. They had been good together, but in the end, her family had to come first, and Mike B was not the type of man to understand that. He was selfish and crude, not to mention callous on the best of days. No, Mike B was not the man of her dreams by any stretch. 

“And how is Mike B these days?” 

“Quieter but no less acerbic. He’s been….” Elizabeth trailed off as if searching for the right word. “...different since you resigned.” The man had been despondent over the split, but she had always assumed he would hop back on the horse, so to speak. 

“Different how?” Nadine asked hesitantly, not entirely sure she wanted the answer. 

“There were a string of dates, but they never went anywhere. Literally. Don’t get me wrong, he’s still Mike, but also not.” Nadine was not sure she understood but nodded nonetheless. “He avoided California whenever it came up on the campaign tour, and I realized why after a while. I didn’t take him to be the sentimental type.”

Nadine chuckled. “Because he isn’t.” Elizabeth crossed her arms as she leaned back against the desk. 

“I didn’t think so either, but he certainly surprised me.” While Mike B was undeniably smug and immature at times, Nadine knew little about him, and it pained her to admit that she never cared to see the rest of his layers. 

“Elizabeth, we need to discuss-”  Speak of the devil.  “Nadine.” 

“Mike.” The years had not changed him too much. The lines of his face were new, both from joy and stress, but they only added to the handsomeness that initially grabbed Nadine’s attention. His hair had streaks of grey just like her own but was nearly unnoticeable among the other flaxen strands. Mike still had impeccable style and that usual air of arrogance around him, but his eyes were less cold than before. Once calculating and cruel were filled with emotion, she could only describe it as regret. Nadine wondered if she looked the same. 

“Good to see you again.” The words were almost robotic coming from his mouth, but they were still sincere. 

“You too. You did a wonderful job on the campaign, by the way.”

“Of course I did.” There was that familiar arrogance. Nadine had a million things she could say to humble the hatchet man, but they tasted bitter on her tongue. The tense moment was broken by Elizabeth sighing and moving toward the door. 

“I need to speak with Blake; I’ll only be a minute.” Nadine knew the other woman was attempting to give the two a moment of privacy but wasn’t sure if she should thank or curse her. 

It was a moment of silence before she spoke again. “You look good, Mike.” His gaze was scrutinizing as much as appraising, but then it settled back to something heavy. 

“You too.” 

“I think I better go.” He waved her off with one hand, the other in the pocket of his slacks. 

“Elizabeth will be back in a minute; I’m sure we can manage without her. I doubt the awkwardness will kill us.”  I’m not so sure . “How is California?” 

“Nothing like D.C., though I’m not sure if that’s good or bad. The traffic is familiar, at least, but I haven’t quite gotten used to it yet; doubt I ever truly will.” 

“Ever think about coming back?” She did, but never seriously. Her thoughts of Washington were nothing more than reminiscing of a past life she could never return to. 

“There’s nothing left for me here.” 

Hurt flashed through his eyes. “Ouch,” Mike said, hand over his heart. “You wound me, Nadine.” 

“We were never going to work, Mike.”

“You don’t know that,” he protested, “because you never actually gave me a chance. I wanted you, but you  never  wanted me!” Nadine was shocked at his outburst as she had not known the man felt that strongly. Mike had not been shy about their late-night meetings nor asking her to stay for dinner, but he had never outright requested a relationship. 

“Mike, I live across the country, and I don’t plan to return. You were good to me, but it’s time we both move on.” In truth, Nadine hadn’t seen much dating either, though not from a lack of offers. Unfortunately, none had come closer to infuriating her as much as Mike Barnow. “I can’t give you what you want, but I do want to see you happy. Go be happy, Mike.” He was tense across the room, and then he was surging forward to wrap his arms around him. 

Nadine relaxed into his grasp automatically, comforted by the familiar scent of coffee and the detergent he liked. “You are the best person I have ever met, Nadine,” he whispered. She’d be lying if she said the words didn’t warm her heart and vowed to keep them close to her heart. A compliment from Mike Barnow that didn’t double as an insult was rare after all. 

“You’ve always been easy to impress,” Nadine replied jokingly, pulling back to study him. “Will you be avoiding California from now on?”

“If only because of the hipsters and avocado toast.” They shared a quiet chuckle, the tension finally bleeding away to their former teasing. 

“I guess you’ll just have to visit and see how nice it is. I’m sure I can convert you in a few days.” 

“You were always good at convincing.” His smirk was lecherous, and Nadine rolled her eyes in good nature, reaching out to slap his shoulder lightly. “We’ll see about California. For now, I’ll let you finish gossiping with Elizabeth. Mike pressed a kiss to her cheek so fast she barely felt it, and then he was gone, but the warmth of his lips remained. 

Elizabeth slipped back into her office minutes later and appraised Nadine in her motherly way. “Everything okay?” The older woman looked past the new President at the door where Mike had exited and nodded. 

“We’ll see.” 

 

Chapter 2: "Hold Me While You Wait" by Lewis Capaldi

Summary:

The Nadine/Mike break up killed my spirit and I just know that Mike moved to California after season 6 and settled down with Nadine. There is no other option and I will not take criticism. They got another dog together.

Notes:

I relate to Mike B on so many levels. I too find comfort in hiding behind acerbic comments and hold a lot of pain regarding lost love. This is all hurt with like minor comfort but I'm really just hurting my poor baby.

Chapter Text

At three o’clock on a Tuesday afternoon, Michael Barnow found himself at his favorite bar in all of D.C. It was an ancient underground joint that few knew about, which is why McCoy’s had risen quickly to the top of his list. Two hours before the earliest Washington grunts were off work, McCoy’s was empty save for Lenny, the bartender. 

“Another,” he said, tipping his glass toward the older man. Scotch filled the bottom of the glass with a satisfying swish, but it was down his throat quicker than it came from the bottle. The burn was familiar after his fourth glass, and it hurt far less than the ache in his chest. 

Mike had called Nadine after their latest tiff and apologized, the words unfamiliar but genuine on his tongue, but Nadine had seemingly ignored them. He could hear her own words playing on repeat in his head.  I just can’t see myself with someone like you.  Mike’s thawing heart had shattered then as Nadine dropped the figurative hammer on it, but he kept it together. He agreed with her, and they hung up on “good” terms, but it was mere seconds after the line went dead before he crumpled in a heap of emotion. 

“Do you plan to kill your liver in a grungy bar? What would the tabloids say?” Mike shrugged to acknowledge Elizabeth’s question but didn’t take his eyes off the empty glass in his hands. “Nadine told me what happened.” 

“Okay.”  Someone like you…  He closed his eyes, willing her voice to leave him be.  We just don’t work…

“She’s moving to California, you know? Her son’s having a baby.” Mike knew vaguely about Roman from his research into Elizabeth’s ragtag team since Nadine never trusted him to disclose any personal information. She learned plenty about him, though. 

Nadine knew more about him than anyone else after their shared nights. It was easy to talk to her in their post-coital afterglow, and Mike found himself telling her everything and anything. His son, his divorce, even his childhood and history with Elizabeth. Some days, heavy topics made her press a soft kiss to his neck in comfort, while other days were light with jokes and anecdotes. Nadine had listened to him ramble no matter the day, so maybe that was why Mike had begun to fall in love with her.

Mike gestured for another round, and Lenny obliged.  

“Mike?” 

“Hm?” Elizabeth rested a hand on his raised arm.

“Talk to me, Mike.” 

“What do you want me to say, Elizabeth?” Mike snapped, slamming the glass onto the bartop. “That your Chief of Staff broke my heart? That I wish I was good enough?” Her pitying eyes did nothing to reinforce the fragile dam in his heart. 

“You  are  good enough.”

“Not for her,” he said softly. “I tried to be better, Elizabeth.   wanted  to be better for  her . Nadine made me believe in those long-shots and sob stories that you’re so fond of.” 

“You loved her.” 

Mike laughed, but there was no joy in it. 

“I was starting to. She just made it so easy.” Taking a shaky breath, Mike tossed back the scotch in his glass. “I loved being with her, and not just like that. Simply being in her presence was like taking a hot shower after getting caught in the rain. I felt like I could tell her anything, and I wanted to say everything.” 

Elizabeth’s eyes were heavy on him as he spoke. “I wish that I was good enough,” he repeated, his voice laden with sorrow. Arms wrapped around Mike, a tight and stabilizing grip, and he fell apart in the embrace. “God, why does it hurt so much?” 

“Because it was real. You were in love with Nadine, and it was  real . It wasn’t another part of your image or a ploy to gain information; you were really in love.” 

“Love sucks,” Mike grumbled, running a hand through his already tousled hair. “This whole thing?  Sucks. ” 

“You’ll fall in love again, Mike. It won’t hurt forever.” 

“While it does, it fucking sucks.” That was the only way to describe the entire situation. Being vulnerable with another person was all fun and games until they left a bigger mess than they found. 

“It’s weird to see you like this,” Elizabeth commented. “I rarely see anything behind the Hatchet Man facade.” 

“It’s not a facade.” Her lips quirked upward, and she poked his shoulder. 

“You’re not nearly as heartless as you pretend to be, Mike. If you were, this wouldn’t hurt so damn bad.” Mike pondered those words for a minute as he debated another drink and then slid the glass away. 

“It would be easier that way.” Nothing would hurt like this again if he simply didn’t feel anything at all. Mike would never feel heartbreak if there was no heart to break. 

Elizabeth shook her head. “No, it would be  worse . If you had no heart, then how would you fall in love again? Without a heart, life would just be meaningless and empty. While there is a pain in love, Mike, there is also a beauty that can’t be measured.” 

“Well said, Shakespeare.” 

“All I’m saying is that you can’t give up on happiness or love. This pain is temporary, and you will fall in love again one day. Just because you and Nadine didn’t work does not mean there was something wrong with you.” 

“I think I’m going to go home now.” Back to his empty apartment where Nadine’s perfume clung to the armchair she favored, and a half-empty wine bottle sat on his counter. “I’m getting a cab, don’t worry. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Mike slid off the bar onto unsteady legs and stumbled his way outside, Elizabeth following close behind. 

“Let me take you home.” Mike didn’t have the energy to argue; all of it used to leave the bar and let the woman put him into the motorcade. The ride was blissfully short, and Elizabeth remained quiet, only telling him goodnight when he nearly fell out of the SUV outside his house. 

Mike didn’t bother turning on the lights as he shuffled toward his bedroom, nor did he remove the expensive suit before collapsing forward onto his bed. The blankets were still rumpled from this morning, and Nadine’s scent lingered on the sheets. He pulled the pillow to his chest and buried his nose in the fabric as tears finally fell. Hopefully, it would hurt less tomorrow. 

 

Chapter 3: "Sunshine" by Keaton Stromberg

Summary:

Henry and Elizabeth fluff!

Notes:

Nothing gives me more joy than Henry and Elizabeth's relationship. Maybe it's because the actors have real chemistry, but their love is literally pure seratonin for me. Have some of Henry just lovin' his wife.

Chapter Text

Elizabeth was many things to him. Wife, mother to his children, technically his boss. Most of all, she was his sunshine. 

Henry had been married to Elizabeth Adams McCord for twenty-five years. Four homes, three kids, two positions in government, and one shared life. The theologian thanked God everyday for his family, but especially his wife. Even when her stubbornness made it damn near impossible. Of course they had their bad days, all couples did even if they seemed perfect from the outside. Somedays his reasoning was not what she wanted to hear, and other days her bullheaded nature was not helpful. 

She still made him feel as giddy as their first date and each kiss was just as electric. His wife had been getting more beautiful as the years went on no matter the occasion, but he appreciated her most in these moments. Now, with her face washed and clothed in a pair of worn sweats and his old USMC t-shirt. Elizabeth looked confident in her work attire, but she was truly comfortable in these clothes. She was studying some trade agreement from work, brows furrowed as she bit the end of her pen in thought. 

“I can feel you staring,” Elizabeth said, not looking up from the page. 

Henry grinned.

“Maybe I’m really interested in what you’re reading.” She looked up at him over her glasses and he saw the small smile pulling at her lips. 

“You’re interested in China’s latest annoyance?” 

“Hm, that’s why you’re wearing your frustrated face,” he said. 

“I don’t have a frustrated face,” Elizabeth denied, her expression turning indignant. “This is my regular face.” 

“You totally do, babe. Your face gets all scrunchy, especially when dealing with China.” 

“I do not get scrunchy .” 

“It’s cute, don’t worry. C’mere, I’ll fix your scrunches.” Elizabeth tried to remain indifferent, but Henry was not giving up that easy. He slid off the bed and inched toward his wife until he was close enough to pluck the packet from her hands. 

“I have to finish reading that!” Henry, at over six foot, nearly towered over his wife so it was easy to keep the papers out of reach. He finally tossed them aside and grabbed her instead, still smiling mischievously as he moved backward. Elizabeth squealed as he unceremoniously pulled her down on top of him and he loved seeing the mirth fill her eyes. 

“There go the scrunches,” he teased, one arm wrapped around her waist to keep her in place while the other poked at her forehead. 

“You are the worst,” Elizabeth grumbled. 

“Maybe, but you married me.” 

“You asked,” she replied flippantly.

“You said yes,” Henry shot back. Her smile became soft and she leaned down for a quick kiss. 

“Yeah, I did.” He grinned at her words and rolled them over so he was hovering over her. “Henry, I need to finish reading that report.” 

“You can take a small break,” he hedged, pressing light kisses to her cheeks and jaw. 

Elizabeth rolled her eyes. “It’s never a small break with you.” One hand trailed down her ribs to settle on her hip suggestively while the other stayed wrapped around her shoulders

“C’mon, you know you want to. I’m sure that whatever China did isn’t more interesting than me.” 

“I don’t know, you know how rousing my arguments with Chen can be,” she teased.

“Should I be jealous?” Elizabeth pressed a lingering kiss to his lips, a warmth flooding his chest. Kissing his wife was as comfortable and familiar as breathing, and Henry is sure he couldn’t live without either. 

“Never. I said yes to you , didn’t I?” 

“Of course you did,” Henry replied smugly. 

“It was a pretty great proposal, Elibet.” The two shared a soft smile at the memory and Henry swooped in for another quick kiss. “You’re my sunshine, you know that, right?” 

Elizabeth smiled back at him. “It’s one of the better things I’ve been called. Though I’ll always prefer being called your wife.” 

“Til death do us part, babe.” 

Chapter 4: 4. "Eastside" by Halsey and Khalid

Summary:

A possible pairing that came from the final season and their cute romance.

Notes:

Thanks to @King_Colby_1 for the idea. I had no plans to do any chapters with Alison, but I'm glad I did. I got to take a lot of liberty with Zach's character and I always enjoy doin' that.

Chapter Text

Alison McCord sat expectantly at a table inside Zeke’s Coffee, eyeing the door as her latte slowly grew cold. It was seven on a Sunday, and she was anxiously waiting for her boyfriend on the Northeast side of Washington, D.C. Her parents would blow a gasket if they knew she was hanging around this part of town, but they would do the same if they knew the guy she was seeing. They met in secret as much as they could, choosing locations near which neither of their families had any business. 

The bell rang as the door was opened, another rush of cold December air following, but Alison only sighed in disappointment. Another hipster. She had nowhere to go at the moment, but the waiting only made her nerves worsen. Another ring, but a familiar head of dark hair popped into her vision this time. His long hair was pulled up into a neat bun, a few strands falling artfully around his face, and his usual beaming smile was in full effect. 

“Ali, sorry I’m late.” She wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug, breathing in the scent of oil paints and the mint shampoo he used. 

“It’s fine; I’m getting used to it,” Alison teased, reaching up on her tip-toes to kiss him. Zach grinned apologetically as they sat at their usual table and reached for his iced coffee. 

“Got caught up with dad; he tried talking me out of my degree again.” While Zach Barnow resembled his father in many ways, they would always differ in their aspirations. Michael Barnow, the Hatchet Man as her father called him, had nothing on his mind but destroying the weak. Zach’s sole focus was to create and show beauty despite the dark times. Sometimes, it reminded Alison of her mother. 

“Did you finally give in?” 

“Of course. I’m trading my Fine Arts degree for one in Law like he always wanted.” Zach couldn’t say that with a straight face. 

“I can only imagine you arguing in a court of law.” 

“Yeah, I don’t have the same ruthlessness my dad does. I don’t want to be stuck doing the same thing either, but he doesn’t get that,” he said, shrugging. “I doubt he kept the painting I gave him.” Alison reached over to take one of his paint-stained hands and smiled softly. 

“He’ll understand one day. You’re crazy talented, and he’d be an idiot not to see it.” Zach had such talent with a brush that Alison was constantly in awe of the works he created and even had one of them hanging in her dorm. 

“Thanks, babe. You ready to get out of here? We have the whole day to ourselves, and I don’t want to waste it.” 

“My parents don’t get back until the end of the week,” she pointed out, though she followed him to the door. 

“True, but we’re both busy with classes after today, and I have a showcase due Friday night. I know you also have that big project you need to finish.” Alison grimaced at the reminder of her midterm. 

“I just need to finish the formal piece, and I’ll be ready to present. I need to find another model since Camden broke his arm in the lacrosse game last week.” They walked down the block where Zach’s navy blue Corvette was parked, his arm wrapped around her shoulders. 

“I can do it if you want; I mean, I did alright the first time.” Their first time hanging out had been in Alison’s dorm as she used him as a mannequin for her final last semester, which was over four months ago. 

“If I can’t find another guy to do it, I’ll let you know. You still have that big piece to finish after all.” They drove out of the Northeast district and to more familiar turf, Zach’s hand engulfing hers on the console between them as they spoke. 

“I can’t finish it until it dries, and you know how oil is. I have like another day before I can even  think  about painting the next layer.” 

“Well, I’m excited to see it on Friday. I’ve loved everything else.” The older boy had a secretive smile as they merged into traffic. 

“You know, you could invite your parents.” Alison sighed at his hinting and bit the inside of her cheek. “C’mon, Ali, we gotta tell our parents eventually. How long do you think we can keep this up?” 

“I want to tell them, and we will, but we gotta do it at the right time. With my mom being president, it’s a miracle we’ve kept it hidden this long.” 

“I know, babe; I just wish we didn’t  have  to hide.” Alison reached over to take his free hand, yearning for that simple connection. 

“Are you having second thoughts? I know it’s a lot, being the president’s daughter.” A majority of her friends were closer to casual acquaintances after the election, but it’s only because they stopped seeing Alison as a normal person. Being the president’s daughter was more complicated than being the secretary’s. 

“My love is yours if you’re willing to take it, Ali. I’m not backing out now.” Zach pressed a warm kiss to her knuckles and briefly met her eyes before turning his attention back to the road. 

“Where are we off to today then?” 

“Somewhere secluded, no paparazzi or tourists.” 

“Kansas?” Alison guessed, grinning over at her boyfriend as he laughed. 

“Not quite as far, but just as empty. Don’t worry, though,” Zach said with a grin. “I’ll have you home by curfew.” 

 

Chapter 5: "Older" by Ben Platt

Summary:

Blake and his thoughts on Election Night.

Notes:

I love Blake Moran and I just know this motherfucker bumps Ben Platt in the mornings. Anyways, this one is no pairing and I want to make it clear that I don't see this as an Elizabeth/Blake piece. I personally don't ship them as they're typically written in infidelity pieces, and I just think they're better friends than lovers. That's my speech for the day, thanks for coming to my TedTalk.

Chapter Text

Blake Moran had done a lot in his life, more than most 28-year-olds had. He was a college graduate, had a fantastic job with the Secretary of State, and got a front-row seat to watch the world change. Don’t get confused; Blake had his fair share of the mundane to partner with the extraordinary. A variety of partners, a million mistakes, and many stories to tell his future children when he’s old and gray. It was a healthy balance, and he wouldn’t trade any of it. Well, most of it. 

Blake sipped his drink as he watched the others dance around the bar, everyone eagerly awaiting the election results. His hands were sore from the numerous songs he had already run through, but the energy still hummed in his veins. He would return to the bench soon enough. 

His eyes found Matt and Jay. The two were grinning at each other as they talked animatedly at the bartop, and Blake found that he felt an almost brotherly affection for them. As an only child, the socialite had always wanted siblings to create chaos, and he found that in the two. Yes, Matt sometimes pissed him off with his prying or exhausted him by mooning over Daisy, but he quickly became a younger brother to him. Jay was more similar to an older brother. He looked out for everyone and enjoyed handing out deserved validation but never hesitated to tell Blake when he was wrong. It always stung at the time, but Blake always saw it as the constructive criticism it was. 

Deeper in the crowd and speaking to the other floor seven workers, Daisy was heard laughing over the music. She often irked him as much as Matt when they began questioning his choices outside of work, but he knew her heart was in the right place. Even if it was a nosy place. Daisy could quickly gain the spot of his older sister. She teased him as a sibling would and tried to give him advice as if she was years older than him rather than just a few months. Her attempts at giving relationship advice never hit home, though, not when Blake had seen her dating history unfold. 

Across the room on the upper level, Blake caught a glimpse of Nadine. She spoke quietly with a man, and he grimaced when he realized it was Mike B.  God, I hate that man.  He wasn’t sure what a woman like Nadine saw in Mike Barnow, but he trusted her judgment well enough. Plus, Blake was convinced that she could kick his ass if necessary, and if not, he would gladly do so for her. Nadine was a strict but kind woman, and he saw her as a morally gray version of the Secretary. She might do things more darkly, but they were both done in the name of the greater good. Maybe that’s why Nadine seemed so drawn to the infamous Hatchet Man. 

Not in attendance tonight was their boss, the Secretary of State. Elizabeth McCord was a lot of things to the world. Too loud, too brash, too much of everything. She was considered an underdog, the winner of the little man, but to Blake, she was just a friend. Their relationship had started to develop when he was just a lowly TA at UVA and had been going strong since. It was easy to agree to join her in D.C. when she asked, and he had yet to regret the decision. Despite the numerous bad things that had happened, such as Iran, Blake loved his job and what he did every day. It may not seem like much on the outside, but being Elizabeth’s assistant allowed him to watch the world evolve every day with the woman who inspired him to change his major. Nothing was worth more to him than helping her. 

“You’re looking too pensive for a man who has consumed many shots.” Blake startled at the sudden appearance of Nadine to his right, his drink sloshing onto the cuff of his suit. 

“I’m just thinking. Is that a crime now?” 

“That depends on your thoughts. Are you thinking about espionage or something worse?” 

“Of course not,” Blake spluttered, unsure of where she got such an idea. 

“Then what’s on your mind? It’s Election Night after all; very few are thinking right now,” Nadine pointed out, languidly sipping her own drink. 

“I’m thinking about everything that has happened, life and such. Everything has changed so much, and I’m just musing. I’m still new to this world, but it’s changed me.” 

“For better or worse?” 

“Not entirely sure.”

“Well, a piece of advice, Blake. Don’t let your wonder turn into closure.” She swirled her scotch. “Let yourself change, but never too much that you forget who you were. This is a whirlwind life, and you don’t want any regrets when you’re done.” Blake stored her words in his mind for further reflection when he was sober and then flagged down the bartender again. 

“I say a speech like that calls for more shots, ma’am.” 

 

Chapter 6: "The Last Time" by Taylor Swift & Gary Lightbody

Summary:

The end of Nadine's encounters with Henry and Elizabeth McCord.

Notes:

This is one of my favorite pairings from this fandom and I have read some superb fics. I just love Nadine finding her happy ending with Henry and Elizabeth, plus the three had some good scenes in the show. I also just adore Nadine in general and can ship her with multiple characters, so it's a win-win for me. That being said, this ain't a happy ending chapter because I'm sad as fuck homies.

Also, happy belated 4/20 to whoever celebrated. This would've been out four days ago, but I got a lil busy celebrating with some friends.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

“You know we can’t keep doing this.” Nadine let them lead her into their home, the house they shared with their children. She could stop this here, at the door, and return home. Yet, there was no going back to the way things were. No going back to what they had before Nadine chose to sleep with another boss  and  her husband. 

“I know,” Elizabeth said, her grip tightening almost imperceptibly around Nadine’s hand as she pulled them upstairs. She could feel Henry’s gaze on them with each step, hot and heavy on her back just as his hands were. Unlike Vincent, there was no spouse left in the dark. Henry had intimate knowledge of her encounters with his wife and Nadine; there were no secrets this time. Except for the affair itself. No one would ever know because there would be nothing to know after tonight. 

They moved loudly down the hall as Elizabeth stopped to press her against the wall, forceful yet mindful of her strength. There were no kids nor secret servicemen to worry about, just as Nadine had planned. If it was their last night together, it would be one to remember. Not that Nadine could ever forget either of the McCords. She would never forget their hands on her skin, their gazes watching her every move, and their unwavering trust in someone who could easily ruin everything they had built. Nadine had no intention of that, so it had to end because they had been playing with fire for far too long. 

It had started innocently enough. Dinners with the entire staff turned to meals with just them at dimly lit restaurants and then cozy meetings in their home when the kids were out. Nadine had not come into their life hoping for this, but she hadn’t turned away either. When Elizabeth had first kissed her, Henry watching with bated breath in the doorway, Nadine hated to admit that she froze. In truth, she had noted how attractive they both were because it was hard not to. They were terrific separately, but together they posed an entirely new threat to someone’s sanity. That night had been the start of many encounters, whether in their home, diplomatic trips, or quickies in the secretary’s office. 

“You’re thinking too much,” Henry whispered, his breath warm against the shell of her ear as he took his wife’s spot. His calloused fingers traced across her jaw almost reverently, and Nadine shoved down the emotions the action elicited as if they would go away. His gaze could be considered adoring if he were looking at Elizabeth but not Nadine. Never her. 

“Try harder,” she finally teased, tilting her head back as he pressed his lips to her neck. They didn’t linger much longer in the hallway as patience was not one of Elizabeth’s many virtues. Not that any of them could be considered virtuous in this situation. 

Henry and Elizabeth stripped each other inside their bedroom with an efficiency that only comes from years of experience and then turned to her. Together they carefully removed Nadine’s tailored clothes and laid her down on their silk sheets with far more gentleness than she was accustomed to. With Vincent, it was usually a hurried affair that ended in his satisfaction more than hers, but the two McCords were strikingly different from him and each other. 

Elizabeth was surprisingly the more dominant of the two, but Nadine shouldn’t be surprised, considering her personality. The younger woman was used to leading and giving orders in her day-to-day life, so it made sense that she enjoyed dominating the bedroom. Despite this, Henry was not strictly submissive either; he simply preferred a gentler touch. While Elizabeth was powerful kisses and roaming hands, Henry was all about soft touches and whispered praise against her lips. It was an odd combination, but it worked well for the two trying to take her apart. There was something uniquely intoxicating about the mix of personalities. 

Nadine would be lying if she said she was entirely present in this moment. Yes, she was physically with them, but a part of her mind was wholly focused on committing this last encounter to memory. It would be all she had of them soon enough. Nadine could lose herself in the sensations, let them play her body like an instrument until they learned every note, but then she wouldn’t be able to remember everything. She wouldn’t see the look on Elizabeth’s face as Henry fucked her now-former Chief of Staff, nor would she see Henry bite back a moan when she began to touch herself beside them. These were the things Nadine wanted to remember when longing got the better of her, and her thoughts fell back to them. 

After, when they had fallen asleep, Nadine was still wide awake as her mind would not allow her to rest just yet. Instead, she observed her two lovers one last time. They were at ease in their sleep; all the wrinkles from stress smoothed away, making them all the more beautiful in her mind. Henry had one arm slung around Elizabeth’s bare waist while her legs tangled with Nadine’s like an octopus. She hadn’t expected them to be so clingy afterward, but she learned after their first night. They had pouted when she tried to excuse herself, so she had given in with a dramatic sigh. Nadine would be lying if she said she didn’t enjoy it. 

Eventually, Nadine carefully extracted herself from their bed when she had committed every line and detail to memory. She gathered her clothes and crept almost silently across the hall to the bathroom. Nadine put herself together again with almost detached ease, righting her clothes and making sure she looked less wrecked than she felt. It would do no good if she left the McCord residence looking freshly fucked even if the secret servicemen stationed outside were technically sworn to silence. 

Nadine exited the home but couldn’t stop herself from looking back once more. 

“This is the last time,” she murmured to an empty street, “I won’t hurt you anymore.” With that said, the words hanging heavily in the chilly air, Nadine walked away from her heart’s desire and to the metro to catch the next train uptown. She had packing to finish. 

 

Notes:

I fuckin love this song by the way, both the original and Taylor's version. It hits me right in the honey nut feelios every time.

Chapter 7: "Grow As We Go" by Ben Platt

Summary:

Piper and Jason in their first apartment.

Notes:

Jason and Piper were a good teen couple that had a lot of room to grow. I really wish they would've focused on them more since Jason was kinda pushed to the side in later seasons.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

“Why the hell do we need eight couch pillows?” Jason yelled, surveying the pile of sky blue fabric in confusion. 

“Don’t ask me; my mom said you could never have too many pillows.” The young man sighed and tossed them onto the couch to get them off the floor. “What else do we have to get from your dorm?” Piper stepped into the small living room and scrolled through a list on her phone. 

“Uh, I still need to grab my records and the last of my books, but that should be it. What about you?” 

“Just my computer and Xbox; the rest is stuff my mom probably wants to keep for nostalgia or whatever.” 

Piper nods her agreement. “So, stuff that can wait till tomorrow?” Jason glanced at all the boxes scattered across their new apartment and nodded. 

“Definitely; we still need to get the bedroom set up, so we have someplace to sleep tonight?” 

“What, you don’t want to sleep on the floor with me?” Jason grinned and reached out to pull his long-time girlfriend to his chest. 

“I’ll sleep anywhere with you,” he said, “but I’m not the one who’ll be complaining about their back in the morning.” Piper rolled her eyes and pushed him away with a gentle shove. 

“You go set up the bed, and I’ll call for delivery. Your dad gave me fifty bucks before we left because apparently, he remembers what it was like being broke college kids.” The young man snorted but left to do as his girlfriend said. Jason plugged his phone into the speakers and set to work on putting their bed frame together with only minimal swearing. The engineering student preferred to work with circuits and processors, but it wasn’t too hard to read instructions. Plus, his dad had him help with many projects throughout the years, so it wasn’t like Jason was entirely clueless. 

“How’s it goin’ in here?” Jason finished twisting the last screw into place and then flopped back onto the carpet. 

“This is why I stick with computers. This stuff makes no sense; how do people do this for a living?”

“We all have a preference. You don’t get my stuff, and I don’t get yours.” 

“And yet, you still listen to what I do every day,” Jason pointed out from the floor. 

“I can still listen even if I don’t understand.” 

“Hopefully, we can get the office space set up tomorrow. I need to finish repairing Mr. Wheatley’s laptop before the weekend.” 

“Well, we aren’t going to finish anything if you keep laying on the floor. Get up, you big baby. Thai will be here soon, and I don’t know which box has the plates in it.” Jason pushed himself off the floor and dutifully followed Piper to the kitchen but stopped to survey the now orderly living room. Everything was in its place, the pillows neatly organized on the couch and armchair, and it looked like a home.  Their  home. 

Piper was already digging through one of the boxes in the kitchen, so Jason cut the tape off another and began putting the items away as they searched. Eventually, he opened the correct box and triumphantly pulled out two forks. 

“Okay, Jace, we still need plates, though.” Jason waved her off as the doorbell rang. 

Walking backward, he said, “The food comes in cartons; no plates needed, babe.” The young man paid the delivery girl and took the food bag with an eager grin. The smell wafting from the cartons was enough to make his mouth water, and it reminded him how hungry he was. The two had been so busy packing that they hadn’t eaten since breakfast, and it was coming back to bite them in the ass. 

The couple settled on the floor in front of the coffee table, their feast spread out in front of them buffet-style. Jason picked at the Pad Thai and the Pad Krapow Moo Saap but devoured the Moo Satay with relish. They ate in companionable silence, occasionally offering whatever thoughts came to mind, and slowly cleaned up the mess when they finished. 

It was nearing eleven when the two ambled into their bedroom. They were bone-tired, and it was finally catching up to them. Jason shed his shirt and jeans, tossing them onto the floor to be picked up in the morning, and flopped backward onto the unmade bed. The sheets and blankets were still in one of the many boxes littering the bedroom floor, but neither of them wanted to try and find them. The mattress was plenty comfortable in their exhaustion. 

Piper tucked herself into Jason’s side and relaxed into his embrace. Music still played from Jason’s phone, but it was much quieter as they took a moment to themselves. The pair had been running around all day, finalizing arrangements and unpacking, so this was the first time they  stopped.  The room was filled with soft piano and the sound of their slowed breathing, but the traffic outside was vastly different from Jason’s former home uptown. A late-night coffee shop was open 24 hours across the street, and if he listened, Jason could hear the jazz when the door opened. 

“Think it’s gonna be okay?” 

“What?” 

“The apartment, us. It’s a big step. Do you think we’re ready?” Jason pondered his girlfriend’s question and then pressed a kiss to the top of her head. 

“I believe that when it’s done, we’re gonna see that it was better that we grew up together.” The young man had his own reservations about taking this step with Piper, but he knew it would be worth it in the end. They loved each other, and they would face every hurdle together. He grew up in a home with parents that genuinely cared for each other, and Jason wanted that same life for himself and Piper. 

“I love you, Jace.” He tightened his arm around his girlfriend and smiled as the familiar warmth filled his chest. 

“I love you too, Piper; we got this.” Eventually, her breathing evened out, and she was fast asleep against his chest. Jason rested his hand over her heart, felt her steady heartbeat strong against his palm, and closed his eyes. 

 

Notes:

I'm a big Ben Platt fan and his first album was just full of hits. I think I used "Share Your Address" when I did the Murlendez shuffle challenge actually.

Chapter 8: "Hoodie" by Hey Violet

Summary:

A little moment between Matt and Daisy post-break up

Chapter Text

There was a hoodie that sat in the back of Daisy’s closet, but she would deny its existence until the day she died. It was a worn scrap of green fabric with cigarette burns in the cuffs and a broken zipper that got stuck often. The Capital Hill logo on the front was faded from years of use and washes, but a faint scent still clung to it.

Daisy didn’t wear it often. It only came out of the closet when the days got too stressful, and the job got to her. Matt had never asked for it back after their situation-ship ended, so Daisy never offered. Instead, she used it for comfort because the smell of Matt’s semi-expensive and old ink never failed to calm her down. It had been a long day of fielding the press and keeping the current crisis under wraps, so a bottle of wine was her best friend tonight.

Daisy was about to settle back on the couch when her phone buzzed. She checked the message and let her head fall back with a groan. The world never rests. Considering the urgency of Jay’s summons, Daisy stepped back into her heels and fled from her apartment with only a second thought to grab her keys. The drive back to the Truman Building was quicker without the daytime D.C. traffic, and the parking garage was equally empty.

Daisy nervously tapped her fingers as the elevator ascended to the seventh floor and breathed a sigh of relief when the doors slid open. She walked briskly down the hall to the conference room where the others were already waiting. Blake spoke quietly with the secretary, showing off their close bond, while Jay and Matt crowded around Nadine. The secretary saw Daisy first.

“Sorry to call you in so late. Did we wake you?”

“No, you know there’s no such thing as sleep for us.” Matt and Jay looked up finally, the latter taking her in behind his glasses. Nadine tucked her iPad under her arm and peered curiously at her.

“That’s an ancient design; they don’t make hoodies like that anymore.” Daisy flushed and fiddled with the sleeves absently. 

“Yeah, uh, it’s pretty old.” She could feel Matt’s eyes on her, his gaze heavy and knowing, and she refused to look his way. Daisy took a seat at the table and tried to focus on the secretary’s recount of the newest issue. Matt sat to her left close enough to feel his presence, and she hated to admit how comfortable it was. For all the faults they had when together, the pair were always at ease. Their closeness had diminished somewhat after their blowout “break up,” but they would never lose the familiarity born from years of friendship.

“Daisy?”

The media coordinator was startled. “Yes, ma’am?”

“I need you to make sure this stays under wraps; I can’t have the media catching this story and running with it.”

“Of course, ma’am, I’ll keep an eye on all the outlets and start on the denials.” Secretary McCord nodded her understanding and turned to give Jay and Matt their own marching orders while Daisy left behind Nadine. She settled back into her office, fired up her computer, and began scouring the web. The coordinator checked every major outlet and a few smaller websites but thankfully came up empty.

Daisy set a few keywords and phrases to be pinged if they came up and instead began working on a few replies to prying reporters. The obvious “no comment” only worked so much, so she needed actual answers that were vague enough to go unquestioned. As a media coordinator, Daisy had no need to be as creative with her work as Matt because she was not meant to. Instead, she was supposed to run her fellow media reporters in circles. Matt was to inspire the masses, and Daisy was supposed to confuse them. Her side of the story may be just as important as his in the long run, but she could admit that constant denials were not as fun as giving hope to the people.

“Hey,” Daisy paused in her typing to find Matt standing in the doorway, “you busy?”

“Usually am, but it’s your office too.” He waved his hand uncaringly and continued to lean against the doorframe.

“I’m working with Jay on some policy stuff  to determine what people should and shouldn’t know, so it’s all yours.”

Daisy’s brows furrowed. “Okay, so what I can help you with?” Matt shifted almost awkwardly, his hands falling into his pockets, and smiled.

“I just wanted to see if that was really the hoodie I’ve been lookin’ for.”

“And if it is?”

“Well, I kinda forgot you ever had it, so I just assumed I left it here or at the gym. I’m glad it didn’t get picked up by Gus; he doesn’t really like me.”

“Probably because you left a sandwich in here for a week when we all went on a diplomatic trip, and it rotted in your desk,” Daisy pointed out.

“Hey, in my defense, we were rushing, and it was right before lunch, so of course, I had a sandwich waiting.” The young woman rolled her eyes but found herself smiling. “Anyways, I just wanted to see if I was right.”

“If you want it back, come take it back.”

“Nah, it’s pretty cold in this building, so that would just be cruel,” Matt teased, grinning at her.

Daisy pointed past him. “Out, I have work to do.” He walked out of view only to pop his head back a moment later.

“Just an f-y-i, it looks way better on you than it did me.” His resounding laugh could be heard through the halls as Daisy chucked her pen at his head. She was still smiling, and it was easy to draw the hoodie tighter around herself with a sigh. 

Chapter 9: "Jenny (I Wanna Ruin Our Friendship" by Studio Killers

Summary:

Blake has an office crush that finally comes out.

Notes:

This song had a fuckin' grip on Tiktok for the longest time and I can't lie that I do like it, it's catchy as hell

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Blake Moran had a type. He was shallow enough to have a physical preference, but appearance could be overlooked if he liked their personality at the end of the day. Of course, it differed between men and women. For men, Blake preferred them to be around the same height and more built than he was if not to have that feeling of safety. On the other hand, Blake liked his women smaller than him, which wasn’t hard at six-foot-three. 

Again, those things can be overlooked if the person possessed a personality quirk that he liked. Blake did not like meek or subservient, but rather someone with the stones to tell him if he was wrong. He enjoyed someone who could banter with him and give as good as they got, who could challenge him to do better. Blake knew he was neurotic most days, so he needed an equally strong partner to put up with him on his worst days. 

Unfortunately, dating was hard when you worked for the State Department. One rarely had the free time to pick someone up at a bar or go on an actual date, which left two options. Either Blake dies alone and sad working for the Secretary, or he dated in-house. Blake had seen how badly the second option could pan out after watching Matt and Daisy’s situation-ship implode, so he was not keen to jump into anything. It didn’t help that he barely knew anyone else aside from his coworkers on the seventh floor. There was only one option that Blake could see himself pursuing, but there was never any indication his advances would be accepted, so he never tried anything. 

Now, nearing midnight in the chilly Truman Building, Blake was confronted with his schoolgirl crush. He liked to think that he and Nadine were friends after all this time, but he could easily want more. Nadine was fiery and just as intelligent as him, all things he loved in a person, but they might be friends, and Blake knew they could never go back if something were to go wrong. 

 She sat across from him, looking as prim and proper as ever despite the late hour, flipping through the folder in her hand as she stared over the rim of her glasses. Blake often thought that the Secretary knew of his unfortunate crush as she always paired the two on late-night projects. He was never sure if it was a blessing or a curse. To sit in front of one’s desire and not be able to say a word was certainly another brand of torture. Blake was  able  to tell her how he felt, but he wouldn’t. The Secretary’s assistant was a coward in Nadine’s presence. 

“Are you going to ask me whatever you are thinking so hard about, or are you just going to continue to stare?” Blake nearly dropped the folder in his hand at her sudden question and scrambled for an answer as she finally looked up at him. “I could feel your gaze; you’re not subtle.” 

Blake settled on a half-truth. “I was thinking about how much has changed.” Nadine eyed him skeptically and then set her file to the side. 

“In what way?” 

“Well, I went from being another finance drone to working for the Secretary of State, so that’s a pretty big change,” he said, fiddling with his cufflinks. “I met all of you. Even if you annoy me sometimes, I like to think we’re all friends.” Blake observed her as he spoke, trying to find any hint of how she felt, but Nadine was an expert with the bureaucratic mask. 

“And how do I annoy you, Blake?” If he couldn’t hear the mirth in her tone, he would’ve been more afraid. Now, he was only moderately scared. 

“The others annoy me,” Blake clarified. “ You  stress me out. You’re just as bad as the Secretary most days. You look after every one on this team, but never yourself, so someone has to.” 

“The special tea you keep in your desk.” It wasn’t a question, but he nodded. 

“I know what every member of our little group likes after a long day. Matt likes to go out, have fun, and get distracted. Daisy used to go with me to karaoke bars, but now she’d rather see her daughter. Jay enjoys a glass of scotch and talking to his kid. And we all know that MSec goes home to Henry.” 

“You’re more observant than we give you credit for,” Nadine replied, shocking the young man though he tried not to let it show. 

“It is my job,” he pointed out, “and I love it. Even when I have to take care of you guys because you won’t take care of yourself.” 

“You’re a good friend, Blake. It’s hard to have those in this line of work, especially in this city, but you are definitely one of the few.”

“I’m whatever you guys need.” Her brow quirked upward, and he saw a smile pulling at the corner of her lips. 

“Anything we need?” Blake’s heart stopped. He was never good at telling when people were flirting with him, so he didn’t want to read too much into her words. His mind warred with the two options before him as they held tension-filled eye contact. Blake could either brush off her words and keep things professional, or he could shoot his shot, as Matt would say. The young man finally stood up, leaned over the coffee table, and tried to summon some of the Secretary’s courage.

Blake reached out to cup her cheek gently with one hand on the table for balance. She didn’t jerk away from his touch nor threaten to castrate him, so he took that as a good sign. 

Anything  you need,” he confirmed, dropping his voice an octave. 

“Blake?” 

“I don’t know how to say this because you’re really my dearest friend, but I want to ruin our friendship.” Blake bent down further to press a lingering kiss to her forehead, savoring the contact and how she subtly leaned forward and then stepped away. “Ball’s in your court, Nadine.” Her cheeks were tinged pink, probably matching Blake’s, and then rose gracefully from the couch.

“How does a late dinner sound?” 

 

Notes:

The thing about this goddamn show is that a lot of the characters had potential to me, like, at least enough tension to find romantic possibility. Blake and Nadine was not something I had really seen until I read some fics, and suddenly I was seeing the potential every time I rewatched the show, so hopefully you guys did too.

Chapter 10: "People Watching" by Conan Grey

Summary:

Nadine muses on all the couples she is surrounded by with a special appearance from a possible Prince Charming.

Notes:

This song is a banger and I love Conan Grey so much. Hope y'all enjoy the final chapter :)

Chapter Text

Some days, the Truman Building felt almost like high school, and it had been a long time since Nadine Tolliver was in grade school. The cliques were just the separate floors and the never-ending pool of gossip that no one could escape. Nadine had done a reasonably good job of staying under the radar with things she didn’t want to make common knowledge, but everyone still speculated. Another aspect was the number of couples she seemed to work with, especially on her own team. 

The Secretary had Henry, her adoring husband, and everyone hated how disgustingly perfect they were for each other. They encouraged one another in ways the Secretary couldn’t get from anyone else, and it seemed like she did the same for him. Nadine had observed their interactions many times, and it always struck a painful chord in her heart as she had never loved someone the way did. The McCords had been together through decades and three kids, and that was simply not something Nadine ever saw for herself and not just because of her advanced age. No one ever got close because she never gave them a chance after Vincent. 

Matt and Daisy were other examples, though not one she wanted to model. Despite their careers and lifestyle, they were still young, so they tended to be caught up in a whirlwind of emotion. Nadine was always unsure if they were finally trying to be in a real relationship since they always seemed to jump back and forth between friends and lovers. Nadine was sure they would work out if they tried, though. Matt and Daisy balanced one another out in a way that their other partners had not. Daisy forced Matt to be more serious while he made her live life to the fullest, things they both benefited from, even as friends. 

Jay was a more realistic option. The young man was already divorced once but did not let it get him down. His new wife was a wonderful woman that kept him on his toes, and Nadine knew they were much better suited than he and Abby. Nadine had attended both weddings, and it was clear how much Jay put into his relationships, but hopefully, he learned the dangers of that after the first time. He gave Abby the wrong parts of himself, that inevitably led to their divorce, but he had already significantly changed this time around. Jay returned home at sane hours to be with his wife and child, which was already an improvement from his first go-round. 

Shockingly, even Blake had someone special in his life. Nadine had suspected such when he suddenly stopped being so neurotic, but he confirmed it privately only two weeks ago. He and his boyfriend, Trevor, went on a weekend trip to Martha’s Vineyard with his parents. It was a big step for Blake, and she was proud of him, which were her exact words when he admitted it. Nadine knew he had yet to tell the others, so it warmed her to be so trusted. It also made her wonder if the Secretary knew.  

The point was that Nadine herself was alone despite being surrounded by so many happy couples. While she couldn’t see herself in a back-and-forth like Matt and Daisy, Nadine did enjoy the thought of being like the McCords. The Chief of Staff had never been in a relationship where both parties had been so consumed by one another, especially not with Vincent, and she could admit she was curious. 

Nadine absently swirled the remaining scotch in her glass, more water than liquor at this point, and downed it in one go. She watched the Secretary and her husband dance across the room, noting the love and adoration they wore proudly for one another. 

“They’re disgustingly cute, aren’t they?” Nadine didn’t turn her head to look at the voice because she didn’t need to. She could pick out Mike’s voice anywhere. 

“They are certainly in love,” Nadine finally replied, flagging the bartender down for a refill. 

“Yeah, my ex-wife definitely never looked at me like that.” She chuckled and turned to look him up and down. 

“I wonder why,” she said sarcastically, sharing a slight smirk with the Hatchet Man. 

“Ouch, Nadine, you wound me. Here I was, just coming to say that you look lovely tonight.” Mike pressed a hand to his chest and adopted a mock-hurt expression. 

“Complimenting other women might be why you got divorced, Mike.” News of his affair had not been private, so Nadine didn’t feel guilty bringing it up. Plus, it would be a  little  hypocritical of her to be judgmental. 

Thankfully, he took it in good nature, saying, “We all make mistakes. I paid for mine and learned from it too.” 

“What, not to get caught?” His stare became heavy, and Nadine found that she couldn’t look away. 

“No, that I wasn’t in love with her. You don’t throw away real love.” 

“You sound like the Secretary,” she pointed out if only to see his face scrunch up. 

“Do not say that. She’ll think I’m going to start being  nice ,” he spat, though he was apparently joking from his smile. 

“You’re not as bad as you think.”

“No,” Mike agreed, “I’m much worse.” 

“Did you come all the way over here just to bother me?” Nadine inquired, arching a brow at the younger man. 

“Absolutely, there’s nothing else I’d rather do.” Something about his words filled the woman with an unfamiliar warmth, but she tamped it down. “You ever been in love like that?” 

Looking back at the McCords, Nadine shook her head. “I’ve been married once, and it ended much like yours did.” 

“I asked if you had been in love, not married. Have you never had that all-consuming love? You know, the kind of love they write those horrible Hallmark movies about.” 

“No,” Nadine admitted quietly, looking away from him. “Someday, I’ll be falling without caution, but for now, I’m only people watching.”