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tommy hated it on this island. it only brought back the worst memories. but he had to power through, for wilbur. one last stop on this stupid tour and they could go home.
tommy took a deep breath. in and out. repeated. then he spoke.
"and this is… the tower."
"the tower? what- what's this for, did dream hurt you with it?"
"well he did but uh, not with this. I made it. this is where i- i tried to kill myself, because of dream." tommy stumbled over the words as he spoke, not wanting to relive them. he was trembling but he hoped wilbur wouldn't notice.
"you did what?" the words sounded cold and harsh.
"I uh, yeah. I jumped. I'm okay now, it didn't hurt cuz' I landed in the water, but dream made me. not literally, like I did it all by myself, but y'know." tommy let out a small laugh, but the silence he received in return made him feel even smaller, as if he wasn't even there.
"uh will? it's okay, I'm okay. it's no big deal. I don’t even really want to be here anymore, let- let's just go, alright?" the tiny boy tugged on his larger counterpart, pulling his arm towards the rowboat they had left on the shore.
the water was calm, peaceful. if you'd only looked at the shore and none of the wreckage behind, it would seem like paradise. maybe that's why ghostbur had liked it so much. the blue tones of the ocean were a great comfort. tommy missed ghostbur.
"no. tommy, tell me what happened here. all of it. what did dream do to you that made you… do that?" wilbur asked, no demanded. he was angry, tommy knew that for a fact.
"i mean, I already did man. plus you were here." tommy muttered, raising his voice slightly on 'here' for emphasis. wilbur didn't seem to notice anyway. "listen wilbur this wasn't a- a vacation it was a fucking exile! none of this was, like, a good experience so I don't really wanna y'know, go through that again."
wilbur turned to face the younger and laid a hand on his shoulder. tommy had to refrain from shuddering at the touch.
"if you don't tell me what happened I can't help you. I uhm… I have a plan. but it won't work, if you can't tell me everything." wilbur said.
well shit. this was going to be hard. tommy reminded himself that it was for wilbur, and when wilbur had a plan it was (mostly) best to follow through. dream deserved to rot in prison, and maybe wilbur could help get him back in there.
"I uh- yeah yeah, okay. I can do that. okay."
"so, from the start of your vacation."
"exile." tommy interjected.
"sorry, exile. I'm not used to- nevermind. from the start of exile."
"well uh, tubbo and dream kicked me out. of the smp, like entirely? I was supposed to be confined to this shitty little island. and dream came around everyday, he would erase everything. all my progress. I would get, like, food and tools and shit like that, and the next day it'd all be gone." tommy started.
"erase… your progress? like what, take all your stuff?"
"no he would uh, blow it up. with tnt. he made these dumb little holes in the sand and I had to throw all my stuff in there, and he'd blow it up. make me stand super close, watch it y'know, so my ears ain't too good anymore."
"that's… that's fucked. I'm sorry man."
tommy laughed and shrugged wilbur's hand away. "it's alright, only gets worse from there eh?"
the sea breeze pushed his hair to the side and tommy noticed wilbur glance at his ears, saw the recognition on his face when he processed the scars strewn about on his skin. tommy tried to ignore the creeping feeling he got down his spine at the stares. at least he couldn't see the others. tommy kept his hair long for a reason.
"he kept destroying all my shit, so I made a little stash thingy under logstedshire. anyway that's not really important 'til later, but he would hit me sometimes. like he'd just get really mad, and we would get into some stupid arguments, and he'd hit me a little. shot me with arrows a couple times, nothing too serious but it hurt pretty fucking bad."
wilbur sighed and shook his head. "then i- well ghostbur… brought you the compasses? the uh, friendship compasses! for you and tubbo."
"yeah, a bit into exile I think. it's a bit blurry, but yeah."
"uh okay I think I'm getting it. so, what about the party?"
"party? what- what party?"
"the beach party. y'know, you invited me but dream said not to go. so I didn't…jeez, dick move on my part. sorry." wilbur lowered his voice as the realization hit.
"It's alright will, nobody showed up anyway. dream stopped all my letters from getting out so no one knew about the party. I kinda forgot about it, repressed memory i guess? i dunno."
"not even tubbo?"
"nada, nothing. not even tubbo. plus he got rid of his compass." wilbur scoffed at that. tommy just shrugged. "dream said that he apparently didn't want to see me. no one wanted to come to the party."
"well he fucking lied. I wanted to come see you, I know that tubbo definitely would've been here if he knew."
"thanks big dubbs, but I don’t know if he would've. that's okay though. I'm kinda glad he didn't have to see me like…like that. I wasn't doing too hot, and I'm always hot so you know it was bad." tommy and wilbur both laughed at that, even if it was a bit of a sad laughter.
maybe tommy could get used to not having ghostbur around. yeah he'd miss him to hell and back, but wilbur was still here. just… different. a lot different, but he could work with it. they could work with it.
"so uh, what happened with your stash? you said you used to hide stuff under logstedshire? what's so important about that?"
"well dream found it one day. he got pissed, as expected, blew it all up. the usual. but this time was different, he- he was angrier." tommy spoke softly. he felt his lip start to tremble. "he uh- y'know. bad shit."
"bad shit. I get it, you can take a break. just breathe, in and out. you got this man." wilbur pulled tommy into a hug.
tommyinnit hadn't been hugged in a long while, so he cried. as he did it felt as though a weight had been taken off his shoulders. he tried to stop himself like he always did but he couldn't, so he just stood there for what felt like years, wrapped in his brother's embrace, and he cried. wilbur didn't push him away or yell at him to stop, just held onto his little brother like when they were kids hiding from thunderstorms.
"I didn’t- I didn't listen. I didn't follow the rules. so he destroyed my tent, logstedshire, everything. all my- my stuff. he used to visit me everyday, but after this he started to come by less and less." tommy shuddered and took a long, deep breath. "he…he told me he was my friend, my best friend, and then he just left me. left me here all alone, and I couldn't even go to the fucking nether! he- he burned my photos of tubbo and- all my stuff was gone."
"and so I realized that he wasn't my friend. he lied to me, he was never my friend. he was… he was just here to watch me like some experiment! and that was when I jumped. i fell in the water and it was shit, this whole place was a fucking shithole, so I left."
wilbur sighed. it sounded like he had been holding his breath for a while. he pulled away from tommy and looked around the ruins of logstedshire, taking it all in once more. tommy just watched and listened to the seagulls. the sun beat down on his cheeks and his feet stung from the hot sand. he wiped the still-warm tears from his face and adjusted the bandana he wore around his neck.
"okay. tommy I'm so fucking sorry that he did that shit to you, but we, yes I said we, are gonna get back at him for all of it. I'm so sorry I ever trusted him, I believed he was a good person and I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I never listened to you, ever. not during l'manburg, not ever." wilbur chuckled. "I hope you can forgive your dear old brother, but uh… that's for a later time, because now we are going to kill that son of a bitch."
tommy locked eyes with his brother and he could see the fire raging in his mind. wilbur reached out a hand and tommy shook it. when wilbur had a plan, it was best to follow through. tommy was ready to follow through. he felt his healing wings flutter lightly under his shirt, and he was reminded of what it was like to be free. he hadn't been able to fly for a while, but he was healing, and he would be free once again.