Archive of Our Own ^beta

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r/AmITheAsshole . Posted by u/perfectionistperfumer March 3rd 2024

WIBTA if I asked my fiance not to include her best friend in the wedding party?

I (25F) and my fiance (24F) are getting married in September and the next step is to put together the guest list and wedding party. Not going to go into too much detail because I just *know* the man I’m talking about is a Redditor, however here’s some context: I love my fiance, we have been dating since high school and she asked me to marry her some six months ago. Her and her best friend (24M) (let’s call him Clown) have been inseparable since they were toddlers, she loves him wholeheartedly and while I can not see why I am just glad she has a friend who she can dance with since I could not dance to save my life and she is the best dancer I have ever seen.

Regardless, I can not stand Clown, he is loud, has poor manners, dresses in an incredibly gaudy fashion, makes unfunny jokes and has bad taste in anime. Furthermore I have known him since he was a freshman and I was a sophomore and the entire time he has been disgustingly and obviously in love with one of his closest friends (25M) and I am nearly certain he has yet to realize it. It’s painful to watch, he gets all mushy and pulls stupid obnoxious stunts to make this guy laugh.

Okay, onto the assholery: WIBTA if I asked my fiance to leave Clown out of the wedding party? I know she will definitely want him as best man but I do not really want to be around him for longer than absolutely necessary, I would never ask her to leave him out of the wedding entirely, this is as much her day as it is mine and against all reason she loves him so of course he is going to be there, but would it really be that bad if he just… came for the ceremony and then left?

I will hold off on breaching the topic until I have a better understanding on if this would be rude or not. I can deal with one idiotic loser on my wedding if it will make the woman I love happy but, yeah I would definitely rather not.

EDIT 1: Okay so consensus seems to be that I would be the asshole but I really just want to drive home how annoying and obnoxious this guy is, he makes me feel like I am going to pop a blood vessel. The only reason I have not erased him from the face of the earth is because he makes my the love of my life smile.

EDIT 2: People have been asking if he is actually mean or anything like that or if he just personally bugs me and while I loathe to admit it, Clown is actually a pretty good guy overall, not a mean bone in his body, he just annoys me, he is incredibly obnoxious.

EDIT 3: Okay, okay I get it, it does not matter how irritating he is, he has to be part of the wedding party, point made. When I have a heart attack because this guy decides to do a flip over the cake table or something equally stupid I will blame it all on you guys.

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r/AskReddit . Posted by u/supercircuit March 15th 2024

Straight Guys of Reddit, What is the Gayest Thing You’ve Ever Done?

u/combustionhazard . March 15th 2024

theres this guy (25M) hes like one of my (24M) closest friends and he’s also my roommate and i sometimes joke our entire relationship is one big game of gay chicken

we do this whole routine where when he gets hit on (hes like crazy hot but hes not looking to date right now so this is pretty common) we pretend to be a couple. originally we were pretty awkward about it but now we go the extra mile and just have fun with it. i get super overdramatic and jealous and he gets all sappy. we have a whole backstory about it and the poor saps that come up asking for his number end up hearing about how i was playing tennis (i played tennis & he played baseball in highschool) and he saw me playing and it was love at first sight. we talk about our cats (we do in fact have cats, theyre amazing and i love them) and any other ridiculously romantic thing we can think of until the person leaves.

also we live together and have since university, we do the whole domestic routine, he makes a killer omelette and i do the chores and we get each other little gifts when we go out. also we cuddle and watch tv together. i’m also planning on asking him to go to my best friends wedding with me.

like its all platonic, we’re just friends, hes like my life partner though. cant imagine a life without him. i dont get what the rush is from my dad for me to get married when im living like this with my capital P platonic partner.

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u/maninred

Dude thats gay as hell. You’re gay as hell. You’re practically married. I know this is you. You’re not slick. I will actually kill you if you ask him to the wedding “as friends” Ver does not need you being stupid and pinning over him on her big day.

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u/combustionhazard

what the hell do you know. i see how you look at your “training buddies” you wouldnt know pinning if it hit you in the face.

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u/maninred

Says the guy who kisses his “bro” goodnight every night and bought him a “friends promise ring”

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u/combustionhazard

its to represent my wholehearted devotion to him! im always going to be there for him and i wanted him to always remember that!

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u/maninred

You say “i love you” every time you say hello or goodbye. “My wholehearted devotion” you sound gay. You are gay.

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u/combustionhazard

im telling franky youre being mean to me and he’ll make you do more pushups.

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u/combustionhazard

okay maybe i am pinning. maybe i am gay. now its your turn to do some self reflection. also im still telling franky you were mean to me.

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r/relationship_advice . Posted by u/MrMole April 3rd 2024

How do I ask my best friend out? He is too stupid to realize I’m in love with him.

I (25M) have been in love with my best friend (24M) and now roommate since we were high schoolers. I’m pretty sure he likes me too and is just too “no homo” to realize it. This guy bought me a fucking promise ring. Like I am going insane here guys.

Okay so, before you all tell me to just “ask him out” I HAVE TRIED. I’m asking Reddit, this is my absolute last fucking resort. Also before anyone says maybe he’s just pretending he doesn’t get it because he’s uncomfortable: I’ve known this since we were teenagers, he can’t fool me for shit. If I were making him uncomfortable I would know. Hell I tried backing off after the first few misfires thinking the same thing and he got so goddamn pouty over it.

Here is an itemized list of all the times I’ve tried to ask him out or have hinted at this in a way that I think is obvious.

1. Turned to him, said “this ones for you”, winked, then hit a home run (yeah I’m embarrassed by my teenage self too. No need to comment on it)
2. I asked him to prom our senior year. I got his best friend to help me organize the whole thing, there was a sign, flowers, I got him his favorite candy ect ect, not my proudest moment I will be honest. We did go to prom but he thought we were just going as friends. There were hearts on the sign. The flowers were roses.
3. Summer of senior year I worked my ass off at two different shit jobs so we could go on vacation together because I knew he wanted to go to this out of state amusement park but never got the chance. There were fireworks. We went on one of those stupid love boat rides. We shared a damn bed despite there being two rooms. That weekend almost killed me.
4. We live together and share a room. I make him breakfast every morning. We have cat children. We regularly refer to them as “our children” and ourselves as their “dads”.
5. I asked him to the movies on Valentine's Day. We watched a romcom. There were heart shaped chocolates involved.
6. We go out for dinner every few weeks, usually just the two of us.
7. I let him use me as a pillow (I’m known with our friends as the kind of guy who hates physical contact)
8. I let him bridal carry me places even though it makes me look stupid because he thinks its fun.
9. We slow dance together. Like just in the kitchen. For fun. He is aware I learned to dance for him (he’s a dancer)
10. Whenever he asks why I’m not in a relationship I tell him I’m not interested and that I “already have him”

His best friend's wedding is coming up and I want to ask him if we can go as a couple but at this point I’m totally lost on how to go about it. Like we would already be going together anyways, I’m part of his best friends fiance’s wedding party and he's best man, but I feel like this is my chance to finally make him realize my feelings.

Please help me out here guys, I do not want to wait until our best friend marriage pact runs out at age 50.

Also I do not feel bad for calling him stupid. I do not care that he is objectively intelligent. I will insult his intelligence all I want for putting me through this.

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u/combustionhazard

sorry to say but, your friend sounds like an idiot! although i guess my friend who i recently realized i’m in love with did a lot of the same things you listed, but it’s different because he’s not into me

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u/maninred

I hope you know how irritating you are. And stupid.

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u/maninred

That’s rough buddy. Couldn’t be me

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u/perfectionistperfumer

This literally is you. Now ask them out before I kill you for being nearly as annoying as Mikey here. Unlike him you do not have the protection of being my lovers best friend. (EDITED)

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u/maninred

Edit their names out or you will not live to see your wedding day.

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u/perfectionistperfumer

So it is as I thought.

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u/maninred

Shut the hell up

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u/krotosfate

I will hope to see you two together at last on my darling and I’s special day!

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u/goldenratio

I’m not coming if you don’t have this figured out by then. Do you know how damn annoying you guys are? However I would not be opposed to painting something for you to give him if it would help you sort this whole mess out.

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u/madcollector

Maybe you could get him one of those jewelry boxes that sings to you? Last time I was at your place his rings and necklaces were everywhere so it would be practical. You could write a note expressing your thoughts and place it inside to read while the song plays. I don’t know if it’s *you* enough though. Hope this helps in some way though!

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 r/NoStupidQuestions . Posted by u/ironlady May 27th 2024

I am in charge of my best friends bachelorette party and I am very confused and very lost

So my friends and I are all pretty young, in our early 20s, this means that none of us are married. However two of my friends are getting married in September.

I’m the maid of honour for one of them.

I don’t know what I’m doing.

I’ve never been to a bachelorette party before, I haven’t even been to a wedding since I was a kid. I have absolutely no clue what I’m doing, furthermore my friend, she’s like crazy fancy. We’re total opposites in that regard, I have tried to understand it but to no avail. I am very worried if we go to a restaurant I think is fancy or something it’ll actually be lame as hell.

ALSO there’s a ton of pressure to make it as awesome as possible, not even just because she’s my best friend but because she’s a lesbian. That means TWO bachelorette parties. And her fiance’s best man is super fancy and he definitely has a better handle on this than I do.

My friend really likes fancy things, she’s really into interior design and makeup, she’s been super into glass blowing lately, she really likes fish and she figure skated all through high school.

Would it be weird if we went to the aquarium, then went figure skating, then went out for dinner, then went back to my place and I let her try out my guns?

I feel like she would get a kick out of the guns. She is a very angry woman. I say that with love.

TLDR: I have no idea what to do for my best friends bachelorette party, would it be weird if we went to an aquarium then went figure skating? Is target shooting an appropriate end of the day bachelorette party activity?

 r/NoStupidQuestions . Posted by u/combustionhazard May 27th 2024

i am in charge of my best friends bachelorette party and i am very confused and very lost

my best friend, ever since childhood. SHES GETTING MARRIED!!!! and me, being her wonderful amazing best friend, am her best man~

that means: i have to plan her bachelorette party…

and okay, you see, i have so many ideas! we could go ballroom dancing, we could go to a gymnasium, we could go axe throwing, we could go wine tasting, the circus, we could go to the spa, we could go see the ballet, the symphony. there are so many things we could do!!

but for one, we can’t fit that all in one day, and two, i don’t know which of these are appropriate bachelorette party plans because i have never been to one! it needs to be perfect, okay you see, my best friends fiance. she’s so lame, yep! but unfortunately my dearest friend is in love with her (eugh) so even though i personally think she has bad taste i support this wedding wholeheartedly. anyways back to the point: this bachelorette party needs to be the best bachelorette party anyone has ever had! not only because its for my amazing best friend who deserves the world but because i *need* to beat her fiance. the stakes are just so high.

which of these are appropriate bachelorette party plans? there needs to be some dancing in there somewhere but other than that things are pretty flexible.

please please please help it needs to be perfect or i will die of shame on the spot.

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u/MoonlightGentleman

Are you entirely certain you aren’t in love with your best friend? This entire post is suspect.

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u/maninred

He isn’t. He’s gay as shit.

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u/combustionhazard

HEY

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 r/wedding . Posted by u/krotosfate June 15th 2024

We Finally Picked Our Wedding Dresses!

My soon-to-be wife and I have been looking for dresses for a while now and we finally found ones that were just perfect! I’ve been gushing about this all day to my friends but I still have so much left over excitement that I just had to share!!

I don’t really know how to say this gently so I’ll just go for it: my fiance and I both care for aesthetics a lot a lot a lot. We’ve both always just been really particular about things, furniture, clothes, jewellery, ect ect, always loved the luxurious things in life. So it’s been pretty tricky trying to find our wedding dresses because not only do we both have pretty specific tastes but we’re also too damn stubborn to settle for anything but perfection.

It’s been a little bit of a nightmare to be honest. For a while there I was worried we wouldn’t be able to find *the right* dresses. But we did! It was really hard to find dresses that looked good together without sacrificing what we each wanted. Mine is this beautiful big fairytale wedding dress and hers has a much slimmer, high fashion, silhouette. They both have matching flower stitching on them and it really ties the whole look together!!

I love my dress so so so so much!! Even as a little little kid I always dreamed of having a beautiful big dress like that!

Ahhhhhh my fiance and i look so so so good together in our dresses! I’m not posting any pictures because we’re not showing any of the guests (except our best man/woman) the dresses ahead of time and my dear friends have unfortunately fallen victim to the trap that is Reddit.com :( (pray for them)

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u/maninred

You say this as if you don’t have a reddit account

Regardless, happy for you Margie, Behamfil’s been telling me how happy you both looked.

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u/krotosfate

Thank you Naib ! I’m so excited for you all to see them!! Please tell Martha I say thank you!

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u/combustionhazard

MARGIE <333333333 ahhhhh im so excited you both looked so so so so pretty!!

 r/wedding . Posted by u/PerfectionistPerfumer June 15th 2024

My wonderful wonderful fiance (ALMOST WIFE) and I got our wedding dresses today!

Short post but I need to talk about this and the romantic side of me needs to stay hidden from my dear friends at all costs, the only one who can know is my (almost wife) fiance.

She’s so beautiful in the dress! She looks like a fairytale princess (she always does but still!) and the way she smiled today when she saw us in the mirror, I want to see that smile every day of my life. Everyday we get closer to the wedding the more real everything feels, I just want to be her wife already, I want our forever, and I mean, it’s not like we don’t already have it, but it’s still special, I love her so much. I adore her, everything is so much brighter with her in my life.

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u/ironlady

VERA I KNEW IT!! You ARE cute about all this, my dear best friend has *emotions* about her upcoming wedding? Who would of thought.

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u/PerfectionistPerfumer

Not a word Martha. Not a word.

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 r/florists . Posted by u/springdemon September 6th 2024

Two of my lovely friends requested that I put together their bridal bouquet

I’m currently in school studying botany, I’m not entirely sure what I plan to do once I graduate but being a florist is definitely up there when it comes to options. Two of my close friends are getting married this month and they requested I put together the bridal bouquet. I’m so excited for them and I did my best to make the bouquet beautiful and significant to them.

They informed me that on their first date V asked M out with a bouquet of daisies she had picked herself (this was a super crazy big deal because V never ever ever would’ve done this for just anyone) so I decided to make the centerpiece daisies! I added some carnations and orchids because I just think they fit the two of them really well and they kind of just fit their general vibe. One of them is very high fashion fancy and the other is very fairytale fancy so idk they just go really well.

I’m so grateful for this opportunity to do something so important for them that I just had to share! I think they’ll like it, I’m so excited for their big day :)

 r/diy . Posted by u/mechmaster September 6th 2024

My friends and I got to make a wedding arch!

I’m currently studying hardware development and my friends enlisted the help of me and a few of our other friends to create their wedding arch. Now, you might be wondering, why would they ask a hardware student to make a wedding arch? And now let me tell you! This is a very special arch! This bad boy has lots and lots of lights AND I got to add some fun spinny flowers that can dance in patterns thanks to u/supercircuit’s programming! So the two of us handled the mechanics of the whole thing and then our other friend took our hard work and made it PRETTY, you wouldn’t believe, he grumbled about it the whole time but you can tell how much work he put into it because it’s just STUNNING. It was so amazing seeing all of our specific skills come together into a finished project since most of the stuff I have sitting at home has exposed wiring and messy marker lines everywhere.

 r/aita . Posted by u/perfectionistperfumer September 6th 2024

He’s coming to the damn wedding

So, returning to my original post here, my fiance’s best friend is unfortunately going to be attending the wedding, but it won’t be as bad as I originally predicted. For one, he’s finally dating that guy, so there will be no obliviousness, however only slightly better, he is now spending all his time waxing poetic to us about his eyes or whatever. I’m counting on his partner to keep him from doing anything stupid, but I don’t know how much faith I have. Everyone please give me patience, lord knows I will need it.

I can’t really be bothered to be annoyed with this idiot though, because I’m getting MARRIED, and to the love of my life even. I have the most wonderful fiance in the whole wide world, she’s simply the best there is. I love her so dearly, hope someday you losers can find even a shred of the joy I feel.

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 r/weddings . Posted by u/perfectionistperfumer September 8th 2024

Married Life

And by married life I mean married day. I have been married for a day, and even though everything is basically the same it feels totally different. The rings for one, the rings are beautiful, I love looking at my hand and remembering a part of her will always be with me even when I’m working long hours. So the actual wedding was wonderful, we enlisted the help of our friends for most of the preparations, and as I thought, they did not disappoint. Also, the guy I was worried about (check other posts idc) was fine, there was an irritating amount of “isn’t he dreamy? ” but other than that he was tolerable, and my wife (MY WIFE!!) looked so happy when they were dancing together (we danced two of course, it’s just I wouldn’t have been able to keep up with the more complicated dancing they were doing), so in the end it was totally worth it. He can actually be kind of funny even.

I keep putting my wedding dress back on just so I can spin around in it. I’m going to remember this day forever. We've even already gotten some photos developed, I have one in my wallet, and there’s one on my bedside. I really am the luckiest son of a bitch in the world.

Anyways, praying my friends don’t see this, but I really just wanted to share, it’s like I have so much happy energy built up that i’ll just die if I don’t express it somewhere

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u/ironlady

Immediately found it.

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u/maninred

You are a hero for putting up with wine drunk Mike trying to tell you that Norton has beautiful eyes then getting angry at you for “cheating” when you agreed to get him to screw off

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u/perfectionistperfumer

I’m so glad you recognize my patience. That man is insufferable.