Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The Alliance were the only ones left.   

MePhone, Four, and Oodle stood in front of the giant portal in front of them, the portal that would teleport them back to their respective dimensions. It didn’t look intimidating, or scary, but that didn’t mean Oodle wasn’t frozen in place, fingernails digging into his palms as his hands curled into tight fists.  

There was a sort of relief that washed over Oodle, at the idea of SHOS being over. But at the same time, a melancholic feeling bubbled deep in his stomach, thoughts crashing around in his head. Did he miss the Blank Slate, his contestants, Tivo? Yes, he did miss all of that, how could he not? But at the same time, he had grown so attached to his fellow competitors, and while he had ended up with some rivals, Oodle would be lying if he said he didn’t find people that he now considered his best friends.   

For once, Oodle didn’t want to go home.  

“So...this is it, huh?” MePhone finally said, breaking the silence. “Looks like we’re heading back home again.”  

“Sure looks that way,” Four replied. “I thought we were going to be stuck here forever.”  

Oodle remained silent, finally taking a few steps back, his eyes filled with a slurry of emotions; dread, hesitation, fear. Usually, he was the upbeat one, the one who tried to look on the bright side, but now…  

“Oodle?” Four turned back to the demigod, quickly blinking once he saw the expression on his face. “Oodle, are you crying?”  

“What? N-No,” Oodle croaked, his voice breaking as he spoke, tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. “I-I mean—I didn’t expect it to be over so soon, but...but...” He trailed off, his body starting to tremble, as if he was holding something back.  

“...Oodle?” MePhone was the first to notice, his face scrunching up in worry. “Are you feeling okay—”  

“I’m not, okay?!” Oodle screamed, making MePhone and Four jump. “I-I don’t wanna go back! I-I just—I really loved getting to know you guys, and now SHOS is over, and we’re going back to our dimensions, and—” Oodle suddenly broke into heavy sobs, his body shuddering as he cried.  

“Hey, hey,” MePhone wrapped his boyfriend in his arms, Oodle clinging onto him tightly. “Shhh, it’ll be okay.”  

“I don’t want to go home,” Oodle blubbered. “I want to stay here with you guys.”  

“Aren’t you an interdimensional demigod though?” Four pointed out. “You could just come to us.”  

“But I don’t know where you guys are!” the demigod screamed. “And there are countless dimensions out there, and I’m still technically doing my own show...it’d take me forever to find you guys! Hell, for all I know, by the time I find your universes, you two could be...you’d be...”  

“We’re not going to die,” Four stated flatly. “My species lives for a really long time.”  

“And I’m technically immortal since I’m a robot,” MePhone added. “We both have more than enough time to wait for you to come find us.”  

Oodle looked up, tears still streaming down his face, snot dribbling from his nose. “You two would really wait for me?”  

“Of course!” Four exclaimed. “Alliance to the end, after all!”  

“And just because the two of us won’t be able to see each other for a while doesn’t mean I won’t still love you,” MePhone added, gently cupping Oodle’s cheek. “I’ll still be waiting when you come to find me. I promise.”  

Oodle sniffled, trying to hold back his sobs, but he couldn’t hold them back, his cries seeming to rip out of his throat as he tried wiping his eyes, to no avail. MePhone held Oodle closer, Four quickly wrapping their arms around the robot and the demigod, the trio sharing one last group hug, everyone’s eyes filled with tears.  

“This won’t be the last time we’re together,” MePhone promised his friend and partner. “It might take a while before we all find each other again, and it might seem impossible, but if we all got through this competition, we’ll be together before we know it.”  

“And when we get back together, we’ll go on a really fun trip!” Four exclaimed as they glanced at the sniffling demigod. “Maybe if we find out where Controlly lives, we can get revenge on him for all the tricks he pulled on us!”  

“That does sound like a lot of fun,” Oodle mumbled, before taking a deep breath. “...okay. I’m ready.”  

Four squeezed MePhone and Oodle tightly one last time before they stepped back, giving the couple some space to say their own proper goodbyes. MePhone bent down to Oodle’s level, gently kissing away the tears that were still rolling down his face before planting another kiss on his forehead, running his metal fingers through the demigod’s long, green hair.  

“I love you, Oodle,” MePhone whispered softly. “I know I don’t say it a lot, but...I do. I really, really do.”  

“I know,” Oodle mumbled back. “I love you, too.”  

The couple shared one long, last kiss, their soft lips pressing together as they both leaned into each other, taking in every last second of this moment, of their last moment together before they had to leave, and they found themselves in their own dimensions again, all alone.  

The two finally parted, their hands hesitant as their grip on each other loosened, before their hands fell to their sides. Oodle dug in his pocket, pulling out the three dollars that O had given him, holding them out to Four and MePhone.  

“I want you guys to each take one,” he explained. “That way, whenever we miss each other, we’ll all have something to remind us of the very thing that brought us all together.”  

There was a bit of hesitation on Four and MePhone’s part, knowing how hard not just Oodle, but all three of them had fought for the prize, but upon noticing the look on the demigod’s face, they knew that he was sure, and so the two of them gingerly took a dollar bill, Oodle putting the last one back in his pocket from where it originally came.  

“Okay then. Then...this is it.” MePhone took a deep breath, Four and Oodle slowly stepping forward again. “...we go together, okay?”  

“...okay,” Oodle said, his voice melancholic and quiet. “You guys get back to your dimensions safe, okay?”  

“We will!” Four chirped, patting the demigod on the head. “We’ll see you later, Oodle!”  

“Four’s right. We will see each other later.” MePhone’s hand curled around Oodle’s, even though he knew the point was moot. “We ready, Alliance?”  

“Yep,” Oodle sighed. “...I’ll see you guys on the other side.”  

The Alliance slowly stepped into the portal, the trio separating as they were taken back to their own dimensions. The three of them barely registered what had happened, only knowing that the next thing that they knew was that one moment ago they weren’t home, and then they were.  

And right behind them, the portal closed with barely a noise to be heard, almost as quickly as it had appeared, leaving O’s world empty once again.  

Chapter Text

So this was it. 

Inanimate Insanity was over. For good, this time.  

There were no more seasons, no more contestants who wanted to play, new or old, and Cobs was in jail, where he belonged. 

MePhone didn’t know what to do, now. Inanimate Insanity was what kept him sane, that kept him from remembering that Cobs was out to get him. He couldn’t imagine a life without it, either. All he’d been doing in the two weeks since II had ended was just wander around the hotel aimlessly. 

MePhone sighed, looking at the dollar bill that he had put in the corner of his mirror. The dollar bill his boyfriend had given him and Four, before the three of them parted ways. MePhone knew that Oodle was going to keep his promise, he knew Oodle was going to come to find him, but still...still, his heart ached. 

And like Oodle said, it was going to be a while before his show ended. And how long was a while? Years? Or maybe just a few more months? MePhone didn’t know. He wasn’t going to complain about having to wait, but he was also not very patient. 

He missed Oodle. And Four.  

Goddamned stupid dimensional shit, and not having interdimensional powers like his boyfriend. 

“I hope you two are doing okay out there, back in your dimensions,” MePhone said aloud. “I wish I could visit you guys.” 

A series of knocks broke him from his train of thought, the android turning to the door. He was puzzled; it was late in the night, too late for MePad, or anyone to visit his room, so who could it be? 

The question weighed on his mind as he headed towards his door, opening it. The dark hallway of the hotel was the only thing that greeted him, not a single person in sight. MePhone furrowed his brow, about to close the door, when he spotted some strange package at his feet. It was just an old, slightly tattered cardboard box with an envelope taped to it, MePhone4 scrawled on it in big, fat letters in bright blue marker. 

“What the...” MePhone cautiously picked it up, inspecting the package carefully. Again, it was late at night, so it couldn’t have been any mail that came in for the hotel’s residents. And he knew that nobody was going out of their way to leave him packages under the guise of a “secret admirer” or something stupid like that, not after Inanimate Insanity, anyway. MePhone carefully plucked the envelope off the package as he stepped back into his room, tucking the box under his arm so he could open the envelope, sliding the contents out into his hand. 

There were two pieces of paper inside; one was a sheet of paper, with strings of numbers and letters written down, and the other contained a note. MePhone held the note up to his face, squinting as he began reading: 

Who I am isn’t important right now. The point is, I’m here to help you with a...dilemma, you seem to be struggling with.  

The box contains a device that serves as a...well, a method of interdimensional travel, to put it in simple terms. The other paper I’ve given you is a series of codes that will help you operate the device. Location points, if you will. The first two should be important to you: I’ve circled them, for your convenience.  

Using this device is simple. Type in the code, press the button, and you will be teleported into the dimension associated with the code. However, do not tell anyone in your dimension about this. There are a multitude of reasons for this, but mostly it is for safety purposes.  

Do not worry about having to pay me back for this, however, expect to hear from me again.  

The note ended there, with no sort of signature of any kind. MePhone looked at the paper with the string of numbers, noticing that two lines of code at the top were circled; one in dark blue, and one in bright green. 

This isn’t real, MePhone thought. This isn’t... really a way to get back in touch with Four and Oodle again, right? This is a dream, isn’t it?  

The papers fell from his hand as he grabbed the box, tearing it open. A black device the size of a tablet sat inside, with some sort of keypad and a button, and a small display screen. It looked like something out of a sci-fi movie, which was why he found himself pinching his arm. 

He could see them. 

He could see Oodle and Four again. 

Did this seem too good to be true? Of course it did—this sort of thing only happened in the old animes and movies that MePhone would stay up late watching with Oodle and Four. But on the other hand, it had been ages since he’d seen the rest of the Alliance, seen his friend and partner. They could all get back together now, sooner than later! And who knows, maybe the three of them could finally take that interdimensional trip. MePhone had the time now, after all.  

His mind was made up. 

Maybe I’ll go and find Four first, MePhone thought, as he generated a backpack, tossing it on his bed as he filled it with various necessities. Oodle seemed pretty upset about being separated from Four and I, so seeing the two of us again for the first time in months might cheer him up.  

MePhone zipped up the backpack and slung it over his shoulder, quickly scribbling out a note for MePad to find, which he left on his bed. Tucking the mystery note into his pocket, MePhone grasped the device with one hand, holding the page of codes in the other. One of the codes was circled in blue, and Four was blue, so the blue circle had to be them, right? It only made sense. 

MePhone's face scrunched up as he typed in the code, his eyes darting from the page to the device, then from the device to the page, as if he were watching some sort of odd table tennis game. After a while of typing, MePhone pressed the enter button, watching the words pop up on the screen.

Enter Access Code: QmF0dGxlIGZvciBCRkIvVGhlIFBvd2VyIG9mIFR3byAtIEhvc3RzIExvY2F0ZWQ6IEZvdXIgYW5kIFR3bw

Processing...

Dimension located. Status: Stable

Beginning transportation.

A large portal appeared in front of MePhone, appearing similar to the portal that had taken him and the Alliance back to their respective homes, once SHOS had reached its conclusion. The colors melted and shifted around, looking pretty, in some strange way.

MePhone took a deep breath, eyes squeezing shut, and stepped into the portal.

Chapter Text

“MePad? MEPAD!!”

MePad winced, blinking harshly as he awoke, being greeted by Toilet’s face being only a few inches away from his own; he wasn’t surprised by this, by any means—this particular moment wasn’t too out of character for Toilet, after all. No, what surprised him was something else entirely.

No longer was MePad in the hotel room that he’d went to “sleep” in; no, while the room was roughly the same size, the walls were lavender with pearl-white trimmings, instead of the eye-bleeding orange that the former assistant was used to. A similar purple-and-white palette was spread around the entire area, from the two twin beds pushed against opposite sides of the room to the chair MePad was slumped over on to the slightly off-putting paintings hanging on the walls. Everything looked like something out of a home improvement magazine, almost too pretty to live in, the only thing out of place in the room being the smell—MePad couldn’t see any incense or candles, but for some reason the room reeked of ash and some sort of calming perfume.

“Toilet?” MePad slurred slightly, his usually smooth voice unnaturally heavy and groggy for the robot he was, almost as if he were waking from a bad nap, and not his usual charging-sleep. “Where are we? What’s going on?”

“I dunno!” Toilet exclaimed. “I just woke up and now we’re here! Maybe we both sleepwalked here!”

“I don’t believe that’s possible, Toilet,” MePad replied carefully, slowly standing up. His memory, after saying goodnight to MePhone the night before, was clouded and fuzzy, as if someone had tried to bury his memory bank in the sand. He remembered wishing MePhone a goodnight, and departing to his room, but after that, there was nothing—at least, nothing before this. “Maybe…maybe Mr. Orange Juice redecorated?”

Of course, MePad didn’t believe it. He was just trying to rationalize things, despite not believing himself; it wasn’t that he was freaking out at the idea of being potentially separated from MePhone—after all, his elder brother could easily manage just fine on his own. But there was a weird feeling boiling deep in his stomach, something he couldn’t ignore.

“But we’re not in the hotel!”

MePad blinked. “I beg your pardon?”

“I took a look outside before I woke ya up! I dunno where we are, but we’re not home!”

…Well, so much for trying to rationalize.

“I…I see.” If MePad could, he’d probably start losing his freaking mind right now. This didn’t feel real—this seemed like something out of some sort of self-produced internet webseries. If MePad didn’t know better, he’d think this was a nightmare or something. “Okay, okay. This is fine, we just need to—”

“Let’s go see if we can find someone!” Toilet bellowed, cutting MePad off and rushing out of the room before the robot could say anything else.

“What—Toilet!” MePad gasped, rushing out of the room behind the screaming man barreling down the hallway. “Toilet, we don’t know we are!”

“I SAW SOMETHING MOVE HERE EARLIER! MAYBE IT WAS SOMEONE WHO CAN HELP!!”

“Toilet, wait! We don’t know if—”

MePad suddenly found himself crashing into someone else, a loud thud echoing through the hall as he and the stranger fell to the floor. MePad groaned quietly as he slowly sat up again, however the other person only merely winced, shaking their head slightly, as if they were trying to clear it.

“Oh, dear—I’m so sorry,” MePad quickly apologized. “Are you all right?”

“I…” The stranger blinked, their almost alien-like eyes staring at MePad for what seemed like an eternity. “…I am fine, thank you.”

“Do you need a hand?” MePad extended his arm towards the other, who stared at the transparent, light purple hand in front of them before slowly nodding in response, slowly grasping MePad’s hand in their own.

They were slimmer and slightly shorter than MePad, which was noticeable once they pulled themselves up with the other’s assistance. They seemed to be some kind of robot or android like MePad was, since they appeared to have the same holographic arms he had, but at the same time, they clearly weren't; the way they moved was simultaneously too fluid for a robot, yet too stiff for an organic being. Everything about them, from their blue, screen-like face to the way they carried themself, just seemed to appear so alien.

“Thank you,” they said, their voice not completely monotonous, yet lacking in any sort of emotion—a bit similar to MePad’s own.

“Not a problem,” MePad replied. “I don't believe I’ve introduced myself, I’m MePad.”

“MePad…” the stranger repeated, beginning to trail off for a moment before they blinked harshly, trying to snap themself out of it. “Apologies, Mr. MePad. I-I am Tivo.”

“It’s alright, Tiv—”

“MEPAD!!”

Tivo jumped slightly, turning quickly to face the oncoming Toilet, who was barreling back at them, dragging some kind of creature behind him—something vaguely human-like, but very clearly not, judging by their yellow skin and big, bug-like eyes.

“There are…others, here?” Tivo said, their statement coming out as a question as they stared at the two people in front of them.

“Toilet!” MePad sighed, relieved that his companion was alright. “Tivo, this is Toilet, an acquaintance of mine, and…” MePad trailed off, staring at the alien holding onto Toilet’s hand. “Um…Toilet, who—”

“This is X!” Toilet exclaimed. “Like the letter!”

“Hi!” X waved at the two androids, the little nubs on their head twitching a little.

“Um…” Tivo fidgeted a little, looking a bit concerned. “Have…have you two seen anyone else? I have been looking for someone—a little short, green hair and skin...anyone like that?”

“Hmm…” Toilet’s face scrunched up, trying to think. “Nope! Nobody like that!”

“Oh.” Tivo’s shoulders fell, as if he we're disappointed. “Thank you, anyway.”

“Hey, don't feel sad!” X cried. “Maybe the others have seen your friend!”

“…others?”

MePad didn't know what to expect when Toilet and X dragged him and Tivo outside, but it certainly wasn't…this.

The grass beneath their feet was bright pink, little white flowers blooming here and there. The sky above, instead of the blue that MePad was familiar with, was a very light purple, with no cloud or sun to be seen.

But MePad wasn't paying attention to the nature around him; no, he was more focused on the people—there were about ten others there, gathered together in small groups, some looking frightened and everyone seemingly just as confused as MePad was.

“Oh great. There's more of them,” a young man in a teal hoodie said dryly, voice dripping with sarcasm. “Woop-de-fuckin’-doo.”

“Hey, knock it off!” A woman in pastel pink smacked the man over the head, scowling at him slightly before turning to MePad and the rest of his small party. “Don't mind Gameport. We’re, uh, still processing the current situation here.”

“I…I see.” MePad glanced around, trying to see if anyone looked familiar, but any searches through his memory banks came up empty. “It's quite alright, Ms….er…”

“Cell,” the woman finished, before gesturing to her group. “And this is Play, Remi, Glow, and you already met Gameport.”

“There are…so many of you here,” Tivo noted. “How did you get here?”

“Same way you did. Woke up in an unfamiliar room in a weird place with no idea of how we arrived.”

“…and you do not know what or who brought you here?”

“If we did, do you think we’d be here?!” A man with shiny-looking hair shouted. “I’ve got a game show to co-host!”

“YOU’RE A CO-HOST?!” Toilet shrieked. “ME AND MEPAD ARE TOO!”

“Former co-host,” MePad clarified. “Our show’s been over for some time.”

“I’m a co-host too!” X piped up.

“As am I,” Tivo added.

It didn't take long for everyone to start buzzing about the brand-new constant between them, the realization of everyone here being an assistant or co-host of some kind of reality or game show (with a few exceptions, anyway). It helped ease everyone’s nerves, but not by much.

MePad was—he was feeling—well, he didn't know. Usually he had at least a small idea of what was going on, but now, he was completely clueless. Who wouldn't be, after being thrust into this strange new circumstance?

“Okay,” MePad mumbled, trailing off as if he were about to continue, but words didn't come, his eyes soon falling on Tivo, who was glancing around the area, eyes growing smaller, as if they were panicking. “Tivo? Are you alright?”

Tivo opened their mouth to speak, only to be interrupted by ear-splitting microphone feedback, a shrill, slightly glitchy sound that made everyone cover their ears and shout and complain about the noise.

“…stupid…okay, maybe if I just…”

An unfamiliar, disembodied voice muttered to themselves, a rustling echoing alongside them as the feedback started to die down.

“There we go! Sorry about that, folks!” the strange voice shouted. “Now that everyone’s conscious and accounted for, we can get things started!”

“Get what started?” the shiny-haired man from before—Platinum—shouted. “Who the hell are you?”

“Names, names…they're not important to me. But for you lot, I suppose the least I can do as your host is indulge you. You may call me Hosty.”

“Host?” X repeated. “Host of what, though?”

“Of the competition, of course!” Hosty bellowed. “I’ve chosen all of the finest cohosts throughout the multiverse to compete against each other in the Co-Host Competition!”

“Like…a reality show?” Remi nervously asked.

“Exactly! Haven't you ever wanted to be in one, my darling?”

“Um…no?” Many other people chimed in, with similar answers.

“Uh, excuse me?” A woman in a Christmasy looking dress piped up. “Uh, hi, Santa Hat here—don't get me wrong, this seems fun and all, but Loaf and I aren't even co-hosts anymore…we’d really just like to go home.”

“I share a similar mindset with Ms. Santa Hat,” Tivo declared, albeit shakily, turning to walk away. “Thank you for the opportunity, but I will have to decline. Now if you will excuse me, I will be on my way—”

“As soon as you find Oodle?” Hosty finished, chuckling darkly. “Oh, Tivo, sweetheart, you don't even know, do you?”

Tivo froze, slowly turning around again. “Know what?”

“Did you really think you'd all be here if your hosts knew about this? Oh, the screaming, the yelling, ‘Don't you even think about taking them, you’ll be sorry!’…” Another sinister laugh. “Your hosts aren't here, you idiots! They don't even know where you are! Heh, I doubt they even care, honestly…”

A silence fell over the cohosts, one that quickly filled with quiet panic and dread. MePad quickly noticed the look of fear on X and Toilet’s faces, and moved to pat the latter on the head, as if he were trying to comfort him.

“Now that that question is answered, start getting into teams! You have one hour, and then the fun begins!”

A small click echoed through the air, Hosty falling silent, at least for the time being.

“MePad?” Toilet asked quietly. “What happens now? How are we gonna get back to Mistag Phone?”

“I…” As MePad trailed off, he noticed Tivo’s catatonic state, eyes staring off into space, body shivering a little bit. They didn't breathe, but their shoulders rose and fell, as if they were hyperventilating.

“…Tivo?” MePad finally said. “Tivo, are you alright?”

Tivo glanced at the group around them for a moment, before they opened their mouth and screamed.