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Takashi Todoroki was a simple boy. One that, truth to be told, didn’t leave a big impression on others. He followed rules, did as ordered, and generally tried to keep his head down when it came to his hacking. Sometimes he got into trouble as Class Representative with other students, but overall, he was a stable, average guy. Not even the speech tick he couldn’t get rid off called much attention to him. His tendency to gossip went mostly unnoticed due to the fact it conflicted with the rest of his image, much to his benefit.
To summarize, Takashi liked to follow routine.
He arrived at school one hour early sharp, every day, and left an hour later. His mother prepared him the same set of meals, all calculated to give the exact nutrition he needs, and anything else he has to choose to get himself (and he rarely did so unless he had company). He would remove and fold his uniform on the exact same spot of his closet, and would finish homework before doing any relaxing. Dueling was to be fit on the weekends and that extra hour after classes, his hacking, every night when everyone was already asleep. Hacking was the only thing that he could offer that few others did, but he kept it a secret for obvious reasons.
Of course, he applied this attitude to his Class Representative duties. To summarize, he would scold the same people who arrived late without fail, he’d make sure the classroom was all clean even if someone skipped their duty, he’d hand over any assignments the teachers asked, and lastly...
If there was one thing that made Takashi stand out from the rest, should people dig deep, is that he was someone who never lost hope.
It seems rather ironic, for some reason. He cannot remember when he developed this part of himself. Part of him thinks someone inspired him...but when he tries to remember the exact circumstances behind that, his mind gets unbearably dizzy until he stops thinking about it. Maybe it doesn’t matter...
Itdoesn’tmatteritdoesn’tmatter.
What matters, is that he doesn’t give up. Even when the adults around him do, “Yamada-sensei, everything is all set for the day! To summarize, all I’m missing is the homework for today’s absent student.”
Yamada-sensei, his history teacher, is a man even more average than Takashi could ever be. He doubts any student will remember him by next year if they don’t get him as a teacher once more, but for now, this man is part of his routine.
And like always...“Todoroki, your dedication is admirable, but—”
“Please, I have to be home by seven precisely.” he interrupts, holding out his hand and smiling in a manner that informs the other that he’s not taking ‘no’ for an answer, and also berates him for wasting their time.
Once, Takashi spent minutes arguing for his decision, bemoaning Yamada and other teachers for daring to give up on a student so easily. But that messed with his routine, and adults never listen to a teenager anyway, so to summarize, he gave up. As long as he gets the homework, that’s what matters.
With a sigh, the portly man gives up, “Here. You’re a good student, which is why I go through the trouble of even preparing this.” then his eyes turn into a mix of concern and gentleness, “But I wish you’d open your eyes some day, Todoroki.”
Completely ignoring his teacher’s words, Takashi smiles, genuinely this time, and takes the assignment, “Thank you very much, sir. To summarize, until next class.” he respectfully bows before turning away.
He doesn’t actually see the man’s face switch to utter disappointment, but he knows it’s there. And like always, he ignores it.
Time to move on to a rather new, but firm addition to his routine.
-- --- -- --- -- --- --
He got lost the first time he came here, but by now, his feet move on autopilot. When he arrives at the reception desk, the woman doesn’t even need to ask what he wants; she merely nods, hands him something to sign, and allows him to go on his way without a single word exchanged. Once, she looked glad to see him, but that is no longer the case.
To summarize, Takashi has become part of her routine as well.
With that, he quietly makes his way through the sterile hallways. They make an effort to keep everything under wraps during visiting hours, but in a place like this, you could never know...
Because this is a mental hospital. And not a very good one, given the one interned here that interests him is from a rather poor family that can’t afford private care. Though they do give private rooms at least, which is good, considering...
When the elevator doors open to make way for his destination, Takashi takes in a breath, as always. And when they open again, his heart beats out of sync. Each step gets him ever closer, to the room where the one who needs this homework is waiting.
He hates this part. Hates not knowing why his body reacts like this, why he sweated cold during the first few weeks. Can never decide if he should knock or not.
So, like always, he takes a moment to catch himself. Lets his eyes wander through the sterile surroundings, inevitably landing on the patient information by the door: Tsukumo, fourteen.
After enough time has passed, his need to make sure he gets home on time overrides everything else. He messes with his hair one last time, and finally, nervously, opens the door—
“Oh, you’re here again. Kinda early, eh Class Rep?” comes the cheery voice, accompanied by a blinding smile that shouldn’t ever belong in a place like this.
But he supposes, Yuma Tsukumo was always like this. Unaware of his surroundings, always smiling or trying to. Catching attention wherever he was, even when he was not making a ruckus and despite his talents in...everything, being rather average, to summarize.
To summarize, it’s the comfort Takashi needs to settle his gut and move forward, try to act normally, “It must be your impression. I always arrive at the same time, give or take a few seconds!” he casually defends himself, as if he wasn’t on the verge of a panic attack a few minutes ago.
Though, in his defence, he is right. He is always on time, but he can’t blame Yuma for lacking a sense of time when locked in a place where every day is almost the same.
Your life coming to a standstill because of something so...well, Takashi doesn’t even like to imagine himself in Yuma’s place.
Maybe it’s part of the reason he always comes here, every day after school, “Well, here’s your homework, Yuma. Are you finished with yesterday’s?” he asks, walking over to the little nightstand right by Yuma’s bed, where a folded breakfast rests against, and fumbling around the drawers.
“Yeah, in the second drawer. I think I got the last problem wrong, maybe, but...heh.” the other shrugs his shoulders, never taking his eyes off Takashi.
He supposes that’s true. Considering his circumstances, Yuma doing his homework every day along with some special exam sheets periodically, is enough to keep him going. It’s how he barely moved grades last year, since poor Yuma unfortunately landed here right before his fourteenth birthday, and consequently, less than six months before the school year ended.
In part, Takashi is surprised that Yuma studies rather diligently now. It’s not how he used to be at all, but like he said previously, not a lot to do here. Yuma doesn’t get any visits besides his sister, grandmother, and rarely his only friend, Kotori. And besides....while Yuma is familiar enough to what little Takashi remembers of him to make seeing his smile comforting, a lot of things about him have changed as well, and he’s not counting his illness. This is just one of the changes.
Since it’s a positive one, he doesn’t focus on how it makes his heart shiver that much. Unlike the other parts of...
“So, how are things at school, Rep? Is Cathy doing fine? I haven’t seen her in so long, though one cat is always around when they let me into the garden...” Yuma asks, a sad smile on his face as he switches to observing Takashi like a hawk, to staring out the window.
Takashi nods, “Yes, she’s around...doing okay in class, likely with her cats.” and swallows a knot of guilt in his throat.
Truth to be told, he doesn’t know much about Cathy. He didn’t even know she was apparently the Queen of the cats until Yuma told him so, and to be honest, couldn’t have been sure if Yuma was speaking nonsense if not for the fact that there is always a cat on the few times the nurses let him go into the garden with Yuma. To summarize, she was just someone who just...blended in the background, for lack of kinder words, and he didn’t ever think Yuma noticed her at all. Did they ever actually exchange a single word or been in a group assignment? He couldn’t tell...
Yet, though as far as he knows, she has never visited him, Cathy does come to Takashi sometimes. Asking him how Yuma is doing, voice so low that he could barely hear it. It’s a bit obvious she has a crush on Yuma despite them not being close, and it’s because of that, that Takashi offers information back. Tells her that Yuma asks about her as well. Encourages to get enough courage to visit him one day.
Even though he really shouldn’t. She could be dangerous to Yuma’s health for all he knows. Yet, when they talk, he speaks to her freely, as if they were old friends. Though he can’t even remember directing a single word to her before all of this either.
It’s the same with Kotori, really. They don’t interact outside of when one asks the other about Yuma, but when they do...to summarize, there’s an odd sense of familiarity to it that it’s scary in how comforting it feels.
Just the fact he always thinks of them by their first names, barely even recalling what their last ones are...
Itdoesn’tmatteritdoesn’tmatter.
Maybe Takashi is delusional because he has no friends. Never had any. Maybe that’s also part of the reason he comes to see Yuma. They feel like friends now, to the point Takashi always called him Yuma from the start as well, not ‘Tsukumo’.
Whereas previously, the only impression he had of him was that he could be a handful to deal with, thanks to his tendency to always arrive late for one...wait, why was he always late again? It had something to do with skateb—
Itdoesn’tmatteritdoesn’tmatter.
This should make him happy, but it’s also painful, because Yuma shows no sign of ever leaving this place. There’s no chance that he could return to school, and the four of them could all eat together at lunch aga—...for once.
And the reason for that, the reason that Yuma is even here...is because he’s utterly lost in his own delusions.
To summarize, he was always the strange kind. Spouting off about Kattobingu or something, never giving up at anything despite sucking, including being Duel Champion. But that was just a cheerful boy being endearing, now he’s...
Yuma came to school one day, and began to cry and scream that several people were ‘gone’. That his best friend never existed, that his group of friends were now strangers to each other, that his precious ‘partner’ betrayed him. That he failed to save everyone from their deaths.
And a whole bunch of other nonsense.
Takashi has heard it all in detail by now, because he’s one of the few willing to listen, without breaking into tears like his sister does. He’s memorized all about the two alien planets, the Astral and the Barian world. About the Arclights and the Tenjos, who were unwillingly roped into their war. How his parents disappeared because of the figurehead of the town, Dr Faker (who in reality only had one sickly son, not two, and never had an underling called ‘Mr Heartland’ who was the mascot of the town.) He knows all about his quest to gather Numbers, how he got enough to make the Barians mad enough to attack the whole planet, in search of the ‘Numeron Code’ that could grant any wish.
He’s also heard about Astral. The alien who actually gathered Numbers. The one who healed Yuma’s deep sense of loneliness, who helped him develop his dueling skills, who led him to meet all the friends that were later killed. The one whom he completed the Numeron Code with, after spilling the blood of a traitorous friend...only to find out the Numeron Code wasn’t that powerful, and while it could be used to destroy, it could not be used to bring people back to life.
To summarize, death was an immutable part of the Universe, Yuma said once. In a way that made Takashi’s very soul shiver, his memories forever haunted by the deep pain and trauma embedded in Yuma’s eyes as he cried that he saw so many people die for nothing.
Of course, Takashi was devastated by that revelation too. Because...
Itdoesn’tmatteritdoesn’tmatter.
Finally, he listened...listened as Yuma revealed what Astral did afterwards. How he betrayed Yuma by wishing to destroy the Barian world...and erase everyone’s memories of every part of the alien’s involvement.
“It was for me.” Yuma had stated, voice trembling, “If he couldn’t bring all my friends back, he wanted to spare me from the pain of their deaths. From the fact he had to leave too. Only...”
And then he had cried, loud and heartbreaking, “Because I was there when the wish was made, it affected everyone but me. So now I’m stuck. I’m trapped with countless deaths flashing over my eyes, and I can’t get over it, because no one else remembers.” a shriek that went straight to Takashi’s heart instead of his ears, and an endless trail of tears, “No one believes I have trauma at all. There is no one to reminisce about anything, and get some closure that way. I’m...I’m stuck.”
Back then, Takashi could do little but comfort Yuma as he cried his heart out, confused to no end. Now, as he looks back on it...Yuma is the most pitiful person in the world.
Because yes, it’s a pain that’s entirely made up in his head. But if for him it’s real, then he’s right that he truly has no way to move on from this. There is no one who can make him heal from something imaginary. And if—
No, best not to think about that now. Today is a normal day, Yuma has long since stopped going on about the ‘past’ to Takashi. For the most part. Now, he’s just happy to see him, seemingly having resigned himself to staying in a mental institution for the rest of his life.
Takashi has too, which is why he’s so mad about the teacher’s reluctance to give him the daily homework. To summarize, yes, they’re ‘right’ to give up on Yuma returning, but they’re not right in giving up on him as a person. Yuma deserves more than to rot away here, forgotten by the outside world, but he and Takashi weren’t friends previously...he needs an excuse to come here, and the homework is it. How can they not see that?
But again, best not to think about that. He got his excuse today, he managed to come visit, and tomorrow he’ll ask Ukyo sensei, who is the one teacher who is always eager to provide him with the homework and everything else, the only one who truly wants Yuma to come back too. Of course he does, because...
Itdoesn’tmatteritdoesn’tmatter.
For the rest of the hour, they talk, Takashi helps Yuma with his homework, duel, and Takashi talks to him about anything and nothing. Ignoring the place they are completely.
Yuma always wins the duels...his deck is so different from what Takashi remembers, though some cards are charred and illegible. Yuma refuses to get rid of them though, obviously, because they are the only things left from—
Itdoesn’tmatteritdoesn’tmatter.
When the time is almost up, Takashi regrets that he has to leave without telling Yuma the full story of how two girls from the year below were fighting over a boy that actually batted for the same team. To summarize, what a shame!
The other smiles, correctly guessing how he feels, “You love gossiping so much.” he chuckles, and then he looks out the window once more, “Tokunosuke loved to join in.”
And once more, Takashi’s heart skips a beat. It’s painful, that name. It’s just another one of Yuma’s many delusions, but for some reason, it’s the one that hurts him most. Sometimes, he finds himself looking below him and yelling the name in the same tone he uses to scold students, because—
Itdoesn’tmatteritdoesn’tmatter.
With that heavy pain in his heart, he finally gets up to leave the room, urging Yuma to do his work, as Takashi will be back tomorrow for certain.
“Thank you, Class Rep.” Yuma thanks as usual, the nickname feeling like a joke between close friends rather than the air of mocking it should bring, “I’m glad, that you’re such a good guy. Always a nag, but loyal too. I’m so fortunate that you and Cathy lived.” he closes his eyes and brings a hand to his chest, “I’m lucky that you’re strong enough to come. I hope I don’t drag you down...I had to force Kotori to come less often because of it. It’s why I don’t want Cathy to visit at all.”
His voice is shaky by the end, almost dropping to a whisper, “I don’t want to be a burden on the few friends that survived, after all. But I also don’t want to be alone...” he laments.
And no matter if he’s insane or not, Takashi knows that those words are sincere.
Not knowing what to say, as always, Takashi just leaves silently.
If he’s crying by the time he passes by the receptionist, the woman is kind enough not to point it out.
-- --- -- --- -- --- --
The walk back home is predictably painful. No matter if he knows Yuma is insane...he always stops to look around.
He stops by the river, to the place where ‘Tokunosuke’ supposedly made a grave for the time ‘Astral’ died. There is nothing left there, of course...but at first, when Yuma began shouting at school, there was a spot where the grass was missing. As if something used to be there...in the exact size of a makeshift grave, to summarize.
Of course, it’s now grown back, and the river looks the same way Takashi always remembers it looking. Yet, his heart always hurts when he passes by the sight where the imaginary grave should be. Of course it does, he was part of the Numbers Clu—
Itdoesn’tmatteritdoesn’tmatter.
Trying to keep himself together, he keeps walking. But not the way he should. Not the shortest path to his home.
Instead, he takes a long detour, like he always does. To a place he doesn’t recall ever paying attention to. An abandoned mansion. One with so many hearts even from the outside, he personally calls it ‘Heartland Mansion’. Even though, his head always begins to spin he does that, and he feels really sick, and—
Itdoesn’tmatteritdoesn’tmatter.
He doesn’t know why he comes here. This place always makes him feel a strange mix of emotions, much different from the other times his head gets dizzy. It goes from curiosity, to fear, to a strange void, to joy, as if his body is living through something his mind can’t comprehend.
Or maybe reliving is more the right word...
Despite being a good boy, he went inside, once. The place only had some chains to close it off, one that you could easily hop over. Funny thing is, some stuff was still inside. Tons of it, in fact, as if the owner of it still lived in it. Yet, thieves never came here despite the stupidly easy mark. No signs that it was up for sale either.
It was as if the entire town forgot about it, to summarize. Except for Takashi. Who comes here, even though he doesn’t recall having any connection to it prior to Yuma being hospitalized.
Inside, in the few corridors he ventured down, there was some stuff that felt...missing. Gaudy clothes, arrogant statues, and other such items to be displayed on the glass cases as if it was a museum. But while many pieces of ‘regular’ art remained, it didn’t match up to Takashi’s expectation.
The expectation to see the face of Heartlan—
Itdoesn’tmatteritdoesn’tmatter.
The disappointment made him so angry that he broke several of the glass cases, as if doing so would make the missing items materialize. A rare moment of letting his frustrations out.
But it made no sense. To summarize, he had never come here before. He couldn’t possibly know what was ‘missing’. Yet, more than the strange mix of emotions, the fact that things weren’t ‘right’, made anger overtake his rational side. Hence, why he never went inside again.
Yet, he still passes by every day, enduring the strange effect it has on his body. Waiting for the day it will all finally ‘click’.
It never does. It just makes him dizzy all over again. Like he always does when his mind ventures off.
He gets the same feelings in other places. By the pool at school. Whenever he walks by the student council. It got to the point he got a medical exemption from PE whenever swimming came up, though he refused to get psychiatric help for his ‘unexplained trauma’. It also made him give up on joining the student council permanently, and he refused to talk to the current President whenever he had the need of something from them, going to random members instead.
It doesn’t make sense. Didn’t he love policing the students during swim class, didn’t he listen to the President once, wasn’t he once part of the disciplinar—
Itdoesn’tmatteritdoesn’tmatter.
The entire school feels tainted. A broken mirror of what it should be.
Once, Takashi loved to collect autographs of famous duelists. Part of him being a gossip meant he participated in celebrity culture as well. Yet, none of the ones he has feel like they matter. Because he’s missing one...the autograph of the current Asia champion. The crown jewel of his collection.
Even though, there currently isn’t one. The last one retired, and the tournament that was meant to replace him went badly, for reasons unknown, and so far, another one hasn’t been held.
To summarize, it’s completely idiotic. A world obsessed with dueling, yet no one cares there hasn’t been a champion in years? Only recently did people start calling for a new tournament already, as if they had suddenly woken up one day and realized the loss.
Coincidentally, that was at the time Yuma went nuts. Of course.
His gut always twists whenever he walks by a dueling billboard that is permanently empty. Everything feels so wrong...no fanservi—
Itdoesn’tmatteritdoesn’tmatter.
The reaction spreads to encapsulate almost the entire town. He can’t pay attention to the hologram announcements any longer. Any time Dr Faker comes up, any time he doesn’t hear an annoying catchphrase...he wants to vomit.
Heartland city feels disgusting. Why is it even called that? There is no connection to hearts at all...why do they even have that gaudy tower, if they don’t use the theme anywhere els—
Itdoesn’tmatteritdoesn’tmatter.
It feels empty too. Of that, Takashi is absolutely certain. Traffic is sparse, empty homes abound, there are not enough people to cover all the job offers. Only recently have others from the outside started to take on those jobs and slowly move in, as if they didn’t notice the offer and space was there for a good long while.
There’s no reason it should be like that. It used to be bustling just last year, he’s sure. The economy was good. Yet, it was like...one day, half the population suddenly vanished out of nowhere.
As if they all died and no one remembered, to summarize.
It’s at moments like those that his arm begins to ache. He rubs at it as if it’s an old wound, but...
Takashi never broke a bone. Ever.
But he did so in Yuma’s delusions. The same delusions that explained everything Takashi was feeling. Because Takashi wasn’t stupid, and he could connect the dots.
Half of the population being missing corresponded to what Yuma said about people picking up ‘fake Numbers’ and being sacrificed to the ‘Barian World’. Heartland once having an obnoxious mascot called ‘Mr Heartland’ corresponded to why the Dr Faker announcements felt sparse and lacking in comparison, along with explaining all the spots around town that should have statues, but were just empty. The ‘missing’ champion could be explained by the fact that ‘IV’ was that champion for years, and people only needed a replacement now because he died. All those places at school corresponded to a story Yuma shared about Takashi himself, of moments between them, their other friends, of the one time he got pulled into ‘Gilag’s schemes’. The mansion too, corresponds to a story Yuma told of almost losing all his friends to ‘Heartland’ after ‘Astral’ died.
That spot by the river, where there was no grass once, truly had a grave in it at one point.
It all synced up perfectly.
Too perfect. And it was just because he was letting his mind be affected by Yuma’s stories, he knew. He sympathized with the boy so much, that he was making his fantasies become real in some way. There was no way it could be true.
Except...Kotori said she got the same feeling sometimes. That every day, she looked back on her childhood with Yuma, and felt like someone was missing from it at all. It was rare for her to say it now, but there was a time she too called out the name of someone who wasn’t next to her any longer.
Tetsuo, to summarize.
But of course, she was close to Yuma, so it made sense she was affected as well. There was no possibility that it could actually be...
Yet, when Takashi finally arrives home, at seven sharp, he proceeds with the next part of his new, unhealthy routine. That is, to scrounge though his entire room, flip through all his books, remove all the clothing from his drawers, make it a mess, to summarize. All in search of one thing...
The autograph of the Asian champion, IV. The one he knows he kept despite the other breaking his arm. The one he prized the most of his entire collection, the one he had hidden away in the safest place he could think of, afraid of someone stealing it one day.
Of course, he never finds that ‘safest place’. Neither the autograph nor IV were real after all. Yet he still searches and makes a mess out of his room every day.
All because of the empty frame in the shape of a heart that he randomly found one day. That was exactly like the ones all the participants for the ‘WDC’ Yuma talked about had. The WDC he too supposedly joined.
That frame could be anything. Something that came with another item else he bought and forgot to throw away. Something his mother thought was a mould for her cookies, got robbed when it didn’t match the online description, and it somehow ended up in Takashi’s room. Something that used to be a paperweight, but the stone inside lost its glue and fell out, yet Takashi liked it so much, he kept the frame anyway as a memento.
To summarize, anything but being the frame that once hosted his entry heart piece to the WDC. The one he lost to IV.
Yet, he keeps it with him, close to his actual heart, in the breast pocket of his uniform. He refuses to throw it away, just like he refuses to forget about the spot by the river where the grass was once missing. Just like he refuses to give up searching for the autograph. He knows it’s there, waiting to be found...
And to make Takashi break when he does.
Because that will be more proof. Proof Takashi will explain away with ‘I wrote and placed this here myself while I was sleeping, because I’m becoming insane like Yuma’, but proof his mind will take note of nonetheless.
Along with the fact that...he is just as trapped as Yuma is, to summarize.
If Yuma’s stories are true, then that means Astral robbed Takashi as well. And Cathy, and Kotori, and Yuma’s immediate family. Robbed everyone who knew those people sacrificed to the Barian world.
Yes, he erased the pain of their disappearance. But he also erased the joy their lives brought to others. He left them with a hole that could never be replaced, but never heal either, as they lacked the tools to make peace with their deaths and move on. The world had to shift and twist to erase traces of their existence.
Astral had no right to do that, and Takashi hates that he can’t even remember the face of the one whom he should clearly hate the most right now.
Yet...”It was for me.” Yuma tells him over and over. So Takashi can’t even be mad at Astral for too long...just...laugh at what a joke this all is.
And clearly, the Numeron Code wasn’t all that powerful, because at least to Takashi, several things went wrong. As his arm aching and itching once more proves.
It was likely because he spent so much time with Yuma, he came to the conclusion of. If Yuma was unaffected by the Numeron Code because he was there when the wish was made...it was because he already knew from the get go that the World the Numeron Code created afterwards was a fake one. It made him invulnerable to its influence.
Therefore, logic dictated, Yuma constantly talking to Takashi about the ‘actual’ past, made the illusion of this current reality shatter for him as well. Slowly, bit by bit...but it got worse every day.
Hence, why he knew he would find the autograph soon. One day, it was going to materialize as if it was always there, to summarize. Maybe he’ll find old photos of the Champion too. Photos that will look charred to everyone else who sees them. Just like the ‘Chaos Rank Up’ and other related ‘Number Cards’ that Yuma still has, but that Takashi’s eyes can’t perceive as anything but burnt pieces of paper.
Yes, surely.
Or maybe, he’s going to end up at the institution with Yuma someday. Just like Kotori almost ran the risk to, before she stopped her visits, and her talk of ‘Tetsuo’ abated majorly ever since.
But no matter the case, if Yuma is right or not...if it ends badly for Takashi either way...
He’s never going to stop visiting Yuma. In fact, he’s going to have to make up some excuse to visit him during school vacations too. Maybe even weekends. He can’t rely on the homework thing forever after all. Perhaps, he might even drop the pretence of an excuse, and just visit Yuma every day. They are friends now at least, right?
No matter what is real or not...
“If you lose to me, you’ll agree to drop that virus bomb!”
“You better win! If you don’t I’ll be framed as a criminal!”
Yuma doesn't deserve to rot alone in a hospital. Of that, Takashi knows for sure. It might make sense, or it might not, but Yuma has Takashi’s loyalty...along with the hope that, eventually, he will heal somewhat. Maybe not enough to ever leave the hospital.
“These guys really admired you! So how could you do this? IV, I won’t forgive you! Fight me!”
But enough to make him smile in a way that makes Takashi’s heart flutter with joy.
Like it quietly remembers doing once. Ever since the matter with Ukyou sensei, imagined or not. That he, along with most people that knew and loved Yuma, regardless if it was several or just Cathy or Kotori, hid away behind a veneer of mocking.
“I mean, if I’m not Class Rep any more, how should I be addressed?”
“It doesn’t matter what people call you! Just because they’re not calling you Class Rep any more, doens’t mean you can’t be one!”
“I wanted to help everyone, even if it was just a little bit. I...I...”
“Press forward on the path you believe in! Show me your kattobingu!”
He hates that he can’t remember why he fell for Yuma most of all. And yet, even before he began visiting Yuma...the feelings were always there.
“Yuma-kun, please have a look. This is Takashi Todori’s Todoringu!”
You cannot erase what is part of your soul, to summarize.
Or maybe Takashi is so lonely that he just fell for a random student out of nowhere.
It doesn’t matter either way. It won’t make his feelings disappear regardless.
Which is why, tomorrow, Takashi’s body is going to convulse as he walks through that corridor, why he’s going to hesitate before opening the door to Yuma’s room; because he knows he has to compose himself enough to impede Yuma from realizing that Takashi isn’t as strong as he thinks. To stop the other boy from cutting off the amount of his visits, just like he did with Kotori.
Takashi is a simple boy. One that doesn’t leave a lot of impression on others. One that doesn’t have much to offer that is special, beyond his secret hacking skills and a speech quirk. One that is a slave to routine, no matter how unhealthy it becomes.
But he will remain by Yuma’s side.
“You’re all going to forgive me?”
“Because we’re friends, right?”
He’s the only one left to do so, to summarize. And Yuma inspired him to never lose hope, no matter the circumstances.
The mind might forget, but the soul doesn’t. It’s an immutable part of the Universe.