Work Text:
"You're not going to get anywhere staring at my grave, you know."
"I know, I just . . . I don't understand what happened!"
"What's there to understand?" Karkat turned and posed a curious face at Nepeta. "I got stabbed, I ran out of blood, I died! Simple."
"Okay, yes, that is very simple, Karkat," Nepeta rolled her eyes at the ghostly figure of him. "But I need to know how you died." Karkat opened his mouth again and Nepeta added,"And not the whole stabbing part, I need to know who did it!"
"Oh, duh, of course." It was Karkat's turn to roll his white eyes. "Well, fuck, if I knew, I'd tell you first, you know that."
"Wow, makes me feel so much better."
"No problem, always here for the shits and giggles." Karkat floated slightly downward, half his pale form in the ground. "So, I liked my buriel. The red flowers were a nice touch."
"Oh, yeah, Kanaya picked those out. Said they would look nice next to the black casket."
"They did, I can assure you. Half my ghost pals simply raved over it, it was quite fun seeing their dumbasses talking about something other than being a ghost."
"Huh, so you can see other ghosts?"
"Yeah, there's about four milling around the area." Karkat pointed across the graveyard towards a cherry tree. "There's one really old guy chilling under that tree, he seems pretty upset. He had to choose between his daughter seeing him or his wife. He chose his daughter."
"Oh, so his wife hates him, huh?" Nepeta asked, staring at the empty tree. Karkat nodded.
"Yeah, she hasn't visited in a while, apparantly. In another state or something. Kinda sucks, you know," Karkat added in a bit of a strained voice,"Being stuck inside one city. I'm glad I died in Chicago, though, plenty of people around here to haunt the asses off of."
"I was wondering what you did when I wasn't here," Nepeta said, smiling slightly. "Seems kinda dumb, but hey, it's you, so I don't expect much else."
"Wow, Nep, that's really fucking rude of you, I'm thinking about traipsing my ass off to the sky emporium now," Karkat said sarcastically, Nepeta rolling her eyes.
"Yeah yeah, go ahead, you're not telling me anything useful, anyway."
"Hey, I told you I was stabbed and I ran out of blood, that's all you need to know!"
"Hey, okay, no, I'd like to know who did the stabbing part."
"Maybe it was me? Maybe I did the stabbing part!" Karkat floated on top of Nepeta and pretty much sat on her head. "Maybe I took the knife and stabbed myself with it!"
"Karkat, they didn't find fingerprints on the knife. Or any knife. There wasn't a knife."
"Maybe when you die you can take whatever you were holding with you!"
"Maybe you're a dumbass, Karkat."
"Ahem, the dumbass you married."
"The dumbass I regret marrying."
"Oh, ouch, Nepeta," Karkat floated upside so his face was up against hers. "That hurt so much, oh my god, you are the worst person ever. I'm leaving, bye!" Karkat slowly floated downwards to his grave.
"Good, maybe I'll get some actual work done for once!"
"Good!"
"Great!"
"Perfect!"
"Fan-tastic!"
"See you!"
"Hate you!"
"Love you!"
" . . . Love you too."
