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Language:
English
Series:
Part 1 of Destiny's Burden Saga
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Published:
2023-06-08
Updated:
2023-07-07
Words:
34,680
Chapters:
4/?
Comments:
14
Kudos:
2
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1
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115

Destiny's Burden

Summary:

Fate is a utopia brought by the savior of all the land, Mary Sue, who rules the planet with her saving function: Destiny. Now, everyone functions on Destiny, prophesizing the stories of several citizens to have history play out as it should. The Chosen Ones are destined good guys with stories written in the book. The Dark Lords are rebels against Destiny and are cursed to be the bad guys. The Averages are background characters with no magical abilities and no life purpose at all. This is how the world runs with the newly formed magic and advanced technological advancements working together to make the perfect world of balance.
And now that is all being threatened by an unexpected force.
To solve this, Mary Sue plans to use it as an opportunity to bring out perfection of her descendant, Charlie Sue, who has come of age for his story as the next Sue savior.
He moves into the capital of the world, Hiro, to solve the mystery of the new force, alongside his destined sidekick and best friend, Sherilyn Rosuto. With help from princess Akari Vesta, and two unknown faces of AJ and Fran, the five of them are here to bring justice to Fate.
Or, they might instead find cracks in how things run.

Notes:

Four years of production. Multiple rewrites. Notes after notes after notes of lore. Three fanfiction on this account. I finally feel confident enough to show this.
My own fantastical story, Destiny's Burden.
Ever since quarantine, I have worked day and night on this story, passionate over it. I really felt like what was originally a spoof on Chosen One stores was coming to life with this world. This story has kept me going through those times, and gave me a ton of purpose as a writer. Had it not been for this, Sketched Artistry Pretty Cure and Total Drama Danganronpa Island would've never been made. It also goes to one of my teachers in high school who saw a draft, and we had a very vital conversation to my confidence that inspired me to get on social media and share my stories. Before then I was a writer since I was six and was passionate over that, but a friend betrayed me when I was going to find success and beat me up and called me a hack. I showed no one my work for a long time.
But here I am now.
This work on this account is going to be a first viewing of this story and allow my viewers to be beta readers. I highly recommend comments regarding any feedback and criticisms you have. Unlike my fanfiction, I'll try to reply to them and explain some things, take the L for flaws, or defend my choices.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Prologue

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

“Do you believe in destiny?”

“What is that?” Asks the little boy. His chipper tone is carried by confusion of the situation around him, and why he was brought here. 

He’s standing in the middle of the towering room around him, with perfected white marble floors, and filled to the brim bookshelves that cover the walls and stretch out for stories. The top of such is accompanied by a star-filled golden chandelier. The only place on the wall that isn’t covered by books are the elevator door behind them, and a glass double door shaped like a three point shield, framed by gold.

It’s all so perfectly designed. Meant to be.

And yet here he is, a kid no older than six whose blonde hair desperately needs to be cut, wearing a simply worn down blue knit sweater and black sweatpants. 

To think he knows the woman who asks. The oh so beautiful woman with not a dent of poor sense. Her pale skin shimmers an astonishing white. Her gold locks flow on her back to her waist, the top of it braided to keep the hair out of her face. Her emerald green eyes glisten like the jewels themselves. Her pink silk dress carries white glitter that shines like stars, carrying itself to the top of the dress, which sparks a white fire around her, covering her torso and her wrists, giving attention to that and enough for the pink sleeves accompanying her arms. Along her dress is a barely visible cape, flowing along her with every step and glittering her signature white. 

It’s no wonder everyone deems her as perfect. She’s perfectly designed in every way.

“Destiny is our world,” She tells him. She points her fingers at the books around him, making him see for himself.

“Destiny creates the purpose of every human being in this world. Everyone knows what they will do with their lives thanks to Destiny. It creates a story prophesied to follow and give Fate history, peace, and prosperity against those who fight against it.”

“Why would anyone fight against it?” He asks.

“They’re evil.” She answers. “It’s why Destiny is made to bring justice.”

“And we protect Destiny,” The boy confirms.

She ruffles his hair, chiming, “That’s right!”

She explains, “You are far more special than any other Chosen One to ever come here. As a member of the Sue family, we harness the pages of Destiny itself and set an example of utter perfection. And the lucky one gets trained to be the controllers of the elements of the story, to run Fate alongside me.”

“That’s your Destiny, Charlie. That’s what you’re meant to do.”

She moves to the gold book in the center of the room. It’s covered in a small bubble of yellow magic. She holds the bubble, eyes notioning Charlie towards the book.

He steps towards it, reaching his hand out, unsure what to do.

After hesitating, he puts his hand through the bubble, caressing the cover of the book.

As he does so, the room around them shatters, creating a glistening void of warm sunrise colors, with letters scattering all over the place. The two figures are hovering in the void, and while she’s calm, he’s shocked by the sudden change of scenery.

All he can do is watch as both of their bodies are covered in a blanket of colored magic. She's pure white. He’s an orangey gold. He’s gazing at his hands in confusion, unsure what’s happening.

She giggles at him, assuring him that it’s all okay.

In a flash, the void disappears and gets vacuumed into the book, leaving the two back into the library. 

Charlie is now in a glistening gold tuxedo, with a deep blue bow tie on his collar. His once messy hair is now slicked to the side and smooth. He’s now holding a golden shield, shaped like the door to the balcony, as well as a big jagged blue sword. 

“What is…?” He’s confused as ever. What has happened to him? He feels so… strong.

“Come,” She offers him a hand. “All of Fate has come to see the new descendent of Mary Sue.”

Indeed, they have.

From the fiery king and queen, two princesses, and one baby prince in the mother’s arms, all with blazing red hair. 

To the fiery military, and the saluting general with his soldiers accompanying him. 

To the folklores. Its king in a samurai uniform, and the little princess in her kimono. Its kids are in similar outfits, including the children.

To the supernatural creatures. The many werewolves and vampires and fairies that inhabit the world.

To the Dark Lords resting amongst the wasteland cliffs in their land and watching the sun rise gold. None of them appear with emotion of happiness, anger, or even an idea of revenge. This is just their life.

To the thousands of citizens watching by the courtyards of the castle. A castle of five glistening silver towers connected by bridges and forts. In the middle tower is where the Sues are.

Then she walks out to the balcony, along their view. Her body glistens a bright white in the sunlight just from standing, and her citizens erupt in cheer instantly.

She gives a smirk, placing a hand to her heart at the praise.

She then hand notions to everyone to settle down, and they do so at her command.

“Chosen Ones and Averages of Fate, I, Mary Sue, and proud to announce the new miracle Destiny has brought to us. He will be present in Destiny’s Empire to defend all of you from the Dark Lords, and will train by the Mentor Circle alongside his shortly destined sidekick. Looking at the little Rosuto there.”

Indeed, there is a family in the front rows waving to them. To be exact, it’s two grown men, with one holding a strawberry blonde girl around the same age as Charlie, who is waving to the balcony. 

There’s another girl, a younger brown haired girl, gripping her fathers’ leg and hiding behind him. It so happens that she’s looking up at Charlie, who is gripping the door in the same shy manner.

He’s looking down in fascination. He doesn’t care about what his mentor is saying.

“When he comes of age, he will carry on the mantle of the next Gold Sue, and the next secondary ruler of Empire. He’ll slay many Dark Lords who come our way, and save the entire branch of this Sue’s tree.”

“Fate, welcome your new hero, Charlie!”

The cheering starts again, and Mary Sue turns around to find Charlie not moving, and by the doorframe.

She doesn’t look him in the eye. Instead, she kneels down and picks him up, carrying him to the balcony.

She lifts him up to the sunlight, making the boys’ golden veins glisten for all to see.

Everyone wildly praises him, rallying themselves up for the new savior.

They all kneel down, bowing to him.

He is their savior. He is their hero. He will be the most perfect person who will save everyone.

And Charlie is confused what any of it means.

Notes:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1YuauW92g3sv6NV87iM_KfD_4sAfLj-4vBRxVUKs5-F8/edit

The link is a view of concept art for character designs. This will be updated for every one that I do, and other characters that get introduced. But for now, this will be a nice visual gateway for you.