Chapter Text
As per your request, the team makes their way to a nearby Mcdonalds to satisfy your post-fight exhaustion cravings. Bucky refuses to let you walk on your own so you now currently have your arms wrapped around his shoulders while his vibranium arm holds onto your waist for more support. All bloody and bruised, you enter the fast food restaurant, immediately catching the eye of everyone inside. Steve sheepishly smiles at everyone, awkwardly motioning them to continue on with their lives.
It works, to some extent. They go back to eating their food and minding their own business but a few intrigued glances slip out from time to time. You’re not exactly used to the attention since you were always so hellbent on staying hidden under the wraps, it almost irks you down to the bone that almost all of the attention is on you. Who is that? Why is she with them?
“Go find us a table, we’ll order for you.” Steve smiles at the two of you. Bucky starts walking to the open table by the corner of the place, carefully pulling you along with him. Sam and Natasha don't follow, pretending to look at the menu board as if they don’t already have half of the menu memorized.
You know what they’re doing, they’re trying to get you and Bucky alone to talk and work things out as soon as possible. However, you don’t plan on giving them what they want. At least not now. You don’t want to talk to him in a place so public, you think the environment isn’t so fitting for a topic so heavy. Instead, you relish the feeling of his body finally being pressed so close to yours after months and months of longing for it. You rest your head on his shoulder once you’ve settled on the booth. You sit in silence for a minute before you decide to strike up a conversation. “Buck-"
“I'm happy for you."
“What?"
“I'm happy for you." he repeats. "Steve can give you so much more than I ever could, I'm glad you realized that. It's good to be loved by him, it's good to love him." you stare at him in shock and realization that this was probably the reason why he never reached out. He, again, jumped into conclusions and expected the worst while you didn’t even get the chance to offer him reassurance.
“The day I left-"
“You don't have to worry about that. I knew I was right. It's really nothing."
“I still mean what I told you the day I left." you speak again after a short silence. “I loved you then, I still love you now. You, Bucky. Not Steve." you patiently and carefully tell him. “I did find comfort in Steve during the days I didn’t have you to run to but that’s really just what friends are for. I did so too with Nat. Even Peter.” you laugh, heart soaring high when you hear him faintly chuckle too. “It’s still you, Bucky. I think it always will be.”
He rests his head on top of yours, sighing. “It’s scary.” he starts. “I’m sorry I was awful but it’s just so scary.”
“Loving me?”
“No!” he replies instantly. “No, that’s one of the best things I have done in my life. It’s the idea of you loving me back.” he wraps his arms tighter around your waist. “Being the winter soldier’s person, it’s dangerous. People who are after me are going to go after you, they’ll want to use you against me and I know somewhere along that path, they’re going to figure out what you can do. It’s all so dangerous and I can’t seem to find a way to work around it.”
“You are not the winter soldier anymore.” you whisper your protest to him.
“To them, I still am. I still can be.” you feel his fist clench, his arm whirring from the sudden pressure. “Hearing you say you love me too, it all got too real too quickly. Not only am I a liability to your safety but I also have nothing to offer you.”
You gently raise your head up to look at his side profile. “You love me.” you smile at him giddily, unintentionally disregarding all the other statements.
“Of course, I do.”
“Say it.” he looks at you puzzled as to what you want from him. “Say it to me.” you repeat.
“I love y-”
“Double cheeseburger and a crap ton of fries for the lady who saved the day.” Sam puts down the tray of food on the table, interrupting Bucky before he can fully say what he wanted to say. What you wanted to hear. He sits on the other side of the table with a smile while looking at you, suddenly stopping when he notices Bucky’s offended stare at him. “What?”
You only laugh and shake your head, straightening up and pulling away from Bucky’s embrace to dig in on the food. “I wouldn’t really call me that, I was the reason it needed saving in the first place.”
“So what’s the plan? They definitely know it’s you now." Steve sits down on an extra chair.
“I can go public. Be an official Avenger!” you open up a ketchup packet. “Tony’s been bugging me about it anyways.”
“Think you can handle that?” Natasha hands you a straw which Bucky takes, noticing that you’re too preoccupied with your burger to take it. He pushes the straw to the lid of your drink and places it in front of you.
"I think I'll be fine, I have you guys to help me around." you sigh, resting your head on Bucky’s shoulder, finally feeling safe and comfortable in the presence of your friends.
The next thing you know, you're back in the quinjet and on the way home. Bucky is right next to you when you decide to play music to pass time. This Love by Taylor Swift. You let the song play out for a few seconds before offering Bucky the other end of the earphones which he happily takes. “Taylor Swift?”
“Yeah, I don’t have old man music.” you smile at him and hold out your hand to him, waiting for him to take it. In silent screams, in wildest dreams, I never dreamed of this.
“Don’t have a comeback for that one.” Bucky takes your hand and entangles it with his, he kisses your hand as he hums to the song playing. You look out the window to see an endless view of clouds and let yourself hear the music accompanied by Bucky’s soft voice. You feel the way his thumb, real and warm, move carefully along your index finger and you smile to yourself, this is exactly how it went a few months ago in the car. This love is good, this love is bad. “I am an old man, literally.” he smiles at you, knowing exactly what you’re thinking.
“I don't mind loving an old man.” you go along with it. This love is alive back from the dead. This time, you feel more secure that you won’t get your heart broken for the second time. You continue. “I meant it before, Bucky. I still mean it now.”
“Good.” These hands had to let it go free, “Because I love you too.” and this love came back to me.
This is what you longed for. In the end, you’re still able to come home to him and that’s all that matters. With the shift of your situation, the road to peace becomes rough and long but it doesn’t seem to matter as long as you’re doing it with Bucky. You two turned out okay, just as he promised you in your room months ago. “Bucky?” you tap your index finger in your intertwined hands. “I’m glad we’re okay.”
“Yeah,” he smiles at you. “We’re okay.”
Just to make sure , “I love you.” you whisper.
And through the soft music, you hear it loud, clear, and unwavering. “I love you too.”
This love came back to me.