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Athena was many things; a hardened fighter, a woman who still mumbled 'reporting for duty' when she got in at night, and an easily flustered lover who blushed when Janey held her hand. She was also, Janey was discovering, a deeply traumatised young woman.
They had settled into something of a routine on the moon, a routine which their move to Hollow Point had broken. That had been bad; Athena's subsequent capture by Lillith had thrown them into even more disarray. They'd been back home maybe a week, but even with the sheer joy of Athena accepting her proposal to become her wife, it wasn't the sweet homecoming Janey had expected. For one thing, Athena had stopped sleeping.
Janey hadn't noticed at first, falling into bed as usual with her arms around the compact assassin. But on waking a few hours later at a noise in the alleyway behind their house (bloody psychos drinking outside), she became aware that Athena was still in the same position she'd been in when they'd gone to bed. "Trouble sleeping, darl?"
"No," Athena said, and stroked her hair. "Get some rest."
And Janey had done what she'd said.
The second night, Athena lay down next to her until Janey fell asleep, and then climbed out of bed and drew a chair up by the window, watching the world outside in silence. The third night, Janey woke up to use the bathroom and caught Athena in the middle of a perimeter check.
By the fifth day, Athena was drinking one coffee on the hour every hour, and Janey had given up on inviting her to bed, trying to get her to sleep. It wasn't working. As a mechanic, she could work wonders on broken machines, misfiring circuits and engines that no longer ran well. Athena was a scrapped child soldier, not a broken engine; it would be harder to fix her.
But she could try.
She'd have to start by breaking something.
When Athena completed her third perimeter check of the day (completed once every two hours), she came home to a broken coffee machine. Janey had taught her enough to attempt field fixes on simple machines like this one, so she settled down behind the kitchen counter, a gun in one hand and a mirror showing her the door - nobody would get the drop on her. It didn't look broken from the outside, and she growled as she pulled it apart one handed to see that several important pieces were missing. There was only one person she knew who had access to her kitchen and could possibly sabotage her coffee maker. "Janey," she called. When Janey didn't answer, she shouted "Springs!"
Still no answer. Which meant Janey was back at what had been at one point Scooter's garage.
Athena walked through the door of Scooter's place looking like a dark cloud. Janey looked up from the engine she was piecing together and smiled like the sun. "Hey there, darl! Visiting me at work?"
Athena faltered on her warpath, her cheeks going red and her words stopping in her throat. Somehow, looking into Janey's dark, piercing eyes always had this effect on her. She could barely look directly at her sometimes, as though her warmth would burn her eyes. "The coffee machine," she managed finally. "Won't work."
"Yeah," Janey had the grace to look apologetic. "Sorry bout that. Needed some of the parts to get a client's engine running. Short notice and all that. Would've told you but you were doing one of those perimeter checks you do."
Athena leaned against the door, nodding even though she was barely listening. It had been nearly a full week since she'd last slept; even with the caffeine built up in her system from her hourly coffees, she still felt heavy. 'Stay aware,' she warned herself. It had only taken a second of letting her guard down for Brick to catch her unaware, for Vallory to shoot her, for a million other examples of people getting the drop on her. 'Stay aware, stay awake.' There was more than one person to keep safe now. 'Stay awake,' she told herself again. 'Keep Janey safe.'
"Oh, are you tired?" Janey was smiling at her. "Want a nap?"
"No," said Athena.
"You sure? I made this for you." Janey came around her workbench and took Athena's hand. Athena let herself be led, pressing her forehead briefly against Janey's back, between her shoulder blades. It was easier to show 'I love you' than to say it. In the office that had belonged to Scooter was a trap door. Janey opened it, climbed down using a metal ladder embedded into the wall. "Come on in!"
Athena didn't need the ladder, dropping instead and landing harder than she'd expected to. She tottered a little on the way back up. Implants and modifications by Atlas meant she could go a long time without a full night's rest, but a week without so much as a nap? That was harder to do without some side effects. Janey placed a hand on her shoulder to balance her and warmth blossomed up through her stomach. 'Stay awake,' she warned herself. 'Stay aware.'
The room Janey had found was used to store important or rare mechanical pieces, climate controlled with metal walls. "I'd like to see someone get in here!" Janey said. Athena punched the wall. It hurt her fist enough to satisfy her and she nodded, impressed. "One access point," Janey said and pointed to the trap door they'd come in through, before taking a remote out of her pocket and hitting a button. "Electromagnetic lock! Built that myself," she said, with a hint of pride in her voice. Athena tugged and then pushed on the trap door and got nowhere.
"Very good," Athena agreed.
"I was thinking," Janey reached out and held her hand, smiled at her. Athena flushed, her eyes seeming to search Janey's to make sure it was okay before she smiled back. "Why don't we have a sleepover down here? I'll bring our mattress and some sheets, you can bring the pillow. If you want, you can even set up a turret outside." Janey slipped the remote back into her pocket; with her free hand, she cupped Athena's cheek. "Whatever makes us safest."
Athena didn't say anything for a second, her Cupid's bow lips turning downwards as she thought carefully. Then she nodded. "I'd like that," she said.
It was a good thing they lived close by, because wrestling an entire mattress over two streets and into a garage felt like an odyssey. Athena helped Janey crush it in, before dropping pillows and sheets down the hole after it. She'd brought a tub of the burn cream Janey used in the evenings to stop her grafted skin from tightening and growing painful, and she held it safe in her arms as she climbed down after their ingredients for their make shift bed.
Athena pushed the mattress into the corner, placed a sheet over it and arranged the pillows perfectly. She helped Janey out of her clothes and rubbed burn cream over her burns and got changed into her own pyjamas. "Point of entry?" she asked, as Janey did up the buttons on her pyjama shirt for her, her own fingers having fumbled.
"Sealed," Janey said and pressed her forehead to Athena's. She could almost hear the cogs whirring in her fiancée's brain, could almost see the misfiring wires beginning to spark a little less. "And I've put the bed right up into the corner so you can feel the wall against your back."
"Nobody will get the jump on me," Athena said, solemnly.
"Not if I can help it, Darl." Janey held her. That was nice, that was warm. Despite herself, despite her remaining doubts Athena could feel herself drifting off, giving in. Her fingers reached for Janey's scarred cheek and she brought Janey's mouth down to hers for a goodnight kiss. Janey lay down, keeping her pressed against the two walls, trying to help her feel safe. "I love you," she said, and her voice was soft and full of care. Athena was the only thing in her shop she couldn't fix with a wrench and boundless optimism, but she could help ease the worst of her problems. "I do love you, my dear lady."
Athena felt her stomach lazily roll over, her body produce the same goosebumps she felt whenever she wanted to kiss Janey, to feel her between her legs, but she was too tired to even follow that train of thought. The warmth of the bed, the silence of the basement, the safety of her current position and the solid protection of her girlfriend had all added together to a situation in which the mercenary could feel all conscious thought slipping away rapidly. It was still too much to say 'I love you.' But, soon. She could feel it bubbling up in her chest and didn't crush I down the way she had down so in the first few months of their relationship. She let it blossom, knew its time would be soon. She reached up to touch Janey's lips and smiled. "Mrs Athena Springs," she said instead. "Can't wait."