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When the rain is blowing in your face
And the whole world is on your case
I could offer you a warm embrace
To make you feel my love
When the evening shadows and the stars appear
And there is no one there to dry your tears
I could hold you for a million years
To make you feel my love
I know you haven't made your mind up yet
But I will never do you wrong
I've known it from the moment that we met
No doubt in my mind where you belong
I'd go hungry, I'd go black and blue
I'd go crawling down the avenue
No, there's nothing that I wouldn't do
To make you feel my love
The storms are raging on the rolling sea
And on the highway of regret
The winds of change are blowing wild and free
You ain't seen nothing like me yet
I could make you happy, make your dreams come true
Nothing that I wouldn't do
Go to the ends of the Earth for you
To make you feel my love
To make you feel my love
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
600 AD
---
When the rain is blowing in your face
And the whole world is on your case
I could offer you a warm embrace
To make you feel my love
---
Aziraphale looked around anxiously. It had been decades since he’d detected Crowley's presence on Earth despite the fact that he had travel extensively for the last several years specifically in search of the demon. Now he could feel Crowley, and knew he was close, but the demon’s essence was very faint, and the angel was concerned he might be injured.
A cold wind swept brutally through the hills, and a light misty rain began to fall. If Crowley was hurt, he wouldn’t last long in this weather. Even more troubling, Aziraphale was certain he could sense the presence of at least one other demon. He moved carefully through the underbrush and looked out from behind a large stone.
He was right. There were three demons. Crowley was on the ground, struggling to stand, as the other two, one tall and one short, kicked at him savagely. They were talking, but he couldn’t hear what they were saying. Aziraphale narrowed his eyes and set his jaw.
“Hastur and Ligur,” he growled, his face white with righteous fury.
He hadn’t liked them when they were angels, so of course, they were completely detestable demons. The tall one, Hastur, was a Duke of Hell, but Ligur was merely a lackey. As a Principality, Aziraphale was powerful enough to overcome all but the strongest demon, but it got iffy when there were multiples, and he’d just flown from Rome to this remote part of Scotland. It had been a long time since he’d flown that far, and he was tired, but he had a plan.
He stepped back behind the stone, unfurled his wings, launched himself into the air and hovered directly over the demons. Humans couldn’t see angels in their true form unless the angel wanted to be seen, and he’d discovered quite by accident, after nearly frightening Crowley to death, that while demons could sense angels, they could not see them.
Aziraphale’s plan relied on the fact that demons were cowardly and lazy. They might project an air of violent menace, but they avoided fights unless they were sure they could win quickly and easily. The angel spread his arms wide and radiated as much ethereal power as he could and still remain invisible.
Ligur’s head came up sharply and he looked as if he were sniffing the air.
“Feel that?” he said, nervously. “He’s strong.”
Hastur also raised his head, and considered the situation.
“We could take him, but why bother?” he said, finally. “Let’s leave this pathetic excuse for a demon to the angel to deal with. I can’t think of a better punishment.”
Ligur chuckled evilly, and both demons vanished.
Crowley sank to the ground gratefully and used the last of his power to take the form of a red and black snake. Aziraphale was beside him in an instant.
“Crowley. It’s me. Don’t be frightened. I have you.”
The angel lifted Crowley’s limp form gently from the ground and tucked it close to his chest. He scanned the landscape until he found a spot in a rocky hillside that had the potential to provide shelter and flew toward it. Miraculously, he spotted a cave immediately and made for it, warding it against demons the moment he entered. He sat cross-legged on the dusty floor, placed Crowley on his lap, and scanned him for injuries.
“What happened?” he asked as he gently stroked the snake’s smooth scales. The demon didn’t open his eyes or answer, but he let himself relax under the angel’s tender ministrations.
Aziraphale made himself comfortable against the far wall of the cave and patiently stroked the exhausted reptile in his lap while he slept. Even though he sat on the hard, dirt floor in his pristine robes, humming absently to himself, the angel looked content to stay where he was indefinitely.
---
When the evening shadows and the stars appear
And there is no one there to dry your tears
I could hold you for a million years
To make you feel my love
---
Aziraphale kept watch through the night and all of the next day. It was dark when he woke the serpent.
“Crowley? Crowley? Are you better?”
The snake hissed.
“Can you turn back please? You know I can’t talk to you when you’re like this.”
The demon hissed again, slowly slid off the angel’s lap and began the transformation.
“Wha?”
“This cave is warded against demons, but I can’t protect you from angels if they should find us. Do you think you have enough power to shield against the ethereal?”
“Hmph.”
Aziraphale felt the subtle surge of Crowley's power, walked toward the entrance to the cave and gently probed at the air.
“That is wonderful!” he exclaimed. “I forget how powerful you are. I expect that’s why it took two demons to attack you.”
Crowley was still tired, and didn’t want to talk about it. He closed his eyes and leaned heavily against the wall.
“Do you think you could give us a little fire?” the angel asked. “I don’t really feel the cold, but I’m worried that it might not be warm enough for you.”
A moment later, a fire appeared in the middle of the cave. There was no wood or other fuel to feed it, but that was not necessary. It would burn as long as they needed it to.
“Oh, thank you! Now, give me your cloak.”
Crowley looked annoyed, but didn’t object when Aziraphale removed his cloak and wadded it up on the floor next to the fire.
“Why don’t you return to your snake form and get comfortable. I assume it will take you a few days to fully heal.”
The demon cracked open one yellow eye, then reverted to snake form. He allowed Aziraphale to place him gently onto his cloak and tuck the fabric tightly around his coiled form.
“There, dear,” the angel whispered calmingly. “Isn’t that much better? You stay here where it’s nice and warm.”
The angel stood and walked toward the cave entrance. Crowley hissed loudly.
“Ssstay.”
“I’m not going anywhere until you have recovered,” Aziraphale soothed him. “The rain finally stopped, and I just want a bit of fresh air. The view from here is spectacular.”
Crowley hissed again.
“Would you like to join me? Of course, you would!”
The angel gathered up the cloak, took it and the snake outside, and tucked them into his lap while he gazed reverently at the stars in the clear night sky.
“Do you know that I still can’t remember the names of the stars?” Aziraphale asked. “I was in Heaven when they were placed, but I just can’t keep them straight in my mind.”
He sighed.
“I should be better. They are so beautiful. They deserve for me to remember their names.”
Crowley didn’t raise his head from the cloak on the Aziraphale’s lap and hummed softly. It was a melancholy sound.
“You can’t see them, can you?” the angel asked sadly.
“They sssing,” the snake hissed. “I lisssten.”
“Let’s listen together, then.”
---
I know you haven't made your mind up yet
But I will never do you wrong
I've known it from the moment that we met
No doubt in my mind where you belong
---
Crowley lay wrapped in his own cloak on Aziraphale’s lap and listened to the vibration of the stars he hung when he was an angel. He was still healing, so he was tired and achy, but he was contented. It had been decades since he last saw Aziraphale, but he didn’t want to think of why that was. Instead, he leaned heavily against the angel, his tongue flicking almost continuously as he tasted the air and remembered the Garden of Eden, the first time he caught the angel’s scent.
---
The Garden of Eden
Crowley noticed the angel standing on the wall over the Eastern Gate one morning while he was talking to Lilith, who the demon quite liked. She was pretty, clever and smelled good. She also wasn’t afraid when he revealed himself as a six foot red and black serpent, which made sense since she and Adam had dominion over all of the beasts in Eden, but he still thought it was kind of bad-ass. Of course, he tried to tempt her to eat the apple, but she just laughed at him.
“Who would be stupid enough to eat fruit from the one tree in a huge garden filled with food that was forbidden?” she asked.
“I know,” he agreed, a little embarrassed, “but I had to give it a shot.”
“You’d probably have better luck with Adam,” she said ruefully.
“You smell better.”
“I guess that’s what’s important, right?”
“You have no idea.”
After that, they would often meet up and speculate about all of God’s mysteries. Crowley was still frustrated that his most beautiful creations weren’t even visible from Earth, and Lilith couldn’t understand why Adam was being such a jerk.
“We were created at the same time!” she said. “Why does he act like he’s the boss all the time? He’s insufferable.”
“I don’t get it either,” Crowley sympathized. “I talked to him once. I bet I could get him to eat the apple….but I’d have to get close enough to tempt him, and that’s a non-starter.”
“Really? It’s that bad for you?” Lilith laughed, clearly not believing him.
“It’s bad, but I’m also in no hurry to get out of this garden. I’m not positive, but I’m pretty sure that’s what will happen if I’m successful, so I figured I’d bide my time a little longer.”
“Have you met the angel, yet?” Lilith asked a few nights later as she watched the stars come out.
“No. We’re enemies. I doubt he’d want anything to do with me.”
“Enemies? Because he is an angel, and you’re a demon? Weren’t you all angels at one time?”
“Yup.”
“Do you feel much different?”
“I guess. I obviously feel different because I have an aching, empty hole where the Lord’s love used to be, and because I know what it’s like to burn in a pit of boiling sulfur for centuries. I also have this itch on my left wing that I can’t reach and it’s driving me crazy. I don’t remember itching when I was in Heaven.”
“Do you want me to scratch it?”
“I can’t manifest my true form, so I can’t unfurl my wings, but thanks for asking.”
“No problem.”
“So, the angel?”
Despite himself, Crowley was curious about the angel, with his heavenly robes, curly white hair and pink cheeks.
“His name is Aziraphale, and he seems nice. We’ve spoken a few times. It’s his job to guard the Eastern Gate.”
“From what?”
“No idea.”
“Is it a secret?”
“I don’t think he knows.”
“He told you he doesn’t know what he’s guarding against?”
“I didn’t say that. He just acted kind of cagey, but he was wringing his hands a lot, so I’m pretty sure he wasn’t being completely honest. I don’t think he wants to admit he doesn’t know, but he’s an angel, so he can’t lie. Do you want me to introduce you?”
“Better not. Angel and demon? We might explode.”
“Stop it!”
But it wasn’t long after that when Crowley felt compelled to speak to the angel. He hadn’t seen Lilith in a while. He was curious and a little worried.
“Lilith?” Aziraphale had said. “I’m afraid she has gone away.”
“Gone away where?”
“I have no idea.”
“Why did she leave?”
“She and the Almighty had a tiff.”
“Tiff?”
“Argument?”
“I know what it means. What did they argue about?”
“I have no idea and I didn’t think it was my place to inquire further. She did ask me to tell you goodbye, though.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
“Thank you?”
“Of course.”
Crowley left quickly after that. The angel’s scent was very distracting. He couldn’t stop flicking his tongue and it was embarrassing. He would never forget how it tasted. Sometime later, they stood side by side and witnessed the “first human birth.”
“A rib?” Crowley said, confused.
“Adam demanded that he have authority over all of the animals, and his partner, so the Almighty took a rib to make it happen.”
“Seems drastic. I’m surprised he went for it though. He never struck me as being particularly stoic. He had no way of knowing that God would put him to sleep beforehand, did he?”
“I don’t think so, but that shows how much he wanted dominion.”
Crowley didn’t respond. He was worried. He didn’t want to leave Eden. He’d discovered too many wonderful things in it, including a very pretty angel. But he still had a job to do, and he was fairly certain that anyone who would take orders from Adam, with no questions asked, was going to be an easy mark. Sadly, he was right.
---
Here he was, eons later, curled in Aziraphale’s lap, unsure of what would happen next. One minute, he was positive the angel was fond of him, the next minute, Aziraphale was reminding him that he was a demon and unworthy of any regard. It hurt, but Crowley was an optimist. He was constitutionally incapable of giving up hope.
He hummed quietly into the cloak as he listened to the angel’s heart, and the stars’ songs.
“I would be so good to you,” he hissed.
“What was that, dear?”
“Nothing.”
---
I'd go hungry, I'd go black and blue
I'd go crawling down the avenue
No, there's nothing that I wouldn't do
To make you feel my love
---
A day later, Crowley had recovered enough to take his “human” form, which made conversation with the angel easier. Aziraphale could understand his hisses when he listened carefully enough, but he said they gave him a headache. Crowley still slept most of the day, and Aziraphale was bored, but afraid to summon any books or food. He didn’t need to eat, but it helped to pass the time.
“Why were Hastur and Ligur so angry with you?” the angel asked as they sat in front of the cave listening to the stars.
“Who knows with them,” Crowley said bitterly. “They’re always looking for trouble. They caught me alone, and took advantage. I could take them one at a time, but not together.”
Aziraphale studied the demon for several seconds before responding. Crowley wasn’t telling him everything, but he let it go.
“Where were you?” he asked instead.
“What?”
“I haven’t seen you in decades. Where were you all that time?”
“You know. Here and there. I have a lot of work to do. No rest for the wicked and all that.”
“I was kind of looking for you,” Aziraphale hedged.
He didn’t know whether Crowley could sense him the same way he could sense the demon or whether that was an angelic talent. He didn’t want to tip his hand since the “radar” might come in handy one day, and he was sure Crowley would not like it if he knew he was so exposed.
“Like I said. I was all over. Europe, Asia, Africa, the Americas. It’s no wonder you couldn’t find me. Did you need something?”
“Not really. I just wondered since it had been so long.”
“Well, you’ve found me now.”
“Yes, of course.”
The demon stood and turned toward the cave.
“It’s late. I think I’ll get some sleep. Good night.”
“Good night.”
The demon reverted to his snake form, buried his head in his cloak and curled up in the warm fabric. He did not want to tell the angel where he had been, what had happened or why he was there in the first place. He knew Aziraphale could sense him on Earth just as he could sense the angel, but he had been protecting the angel from the horrors of Hell for as long as they’d known each other, and that wasn’t going to change. Aziraphale knew the moment that Crowley was dragged down to Hell, and the second he came back. Crowley thought about his most recent return to Earth.
---
A few days earlier…
“Guys!” Crowley objected as he struggled to rise from the rocky ground onto which the two demons had tossed him.
“I don’t need your help getting to Earth. I’ve done it thousands of times before. You don’t need to go to this much trouble.”
“Shut it!” Hastur ordered. “Beelzebub said we should escort you back to Earth and that’s what we are going to do.”
“Well, I’m here, aren’t I? You can just go back to Hell.”
“Maybe,” Ligur said quietly. “But I plan on taking advantage of the free pass and checking it out. I haven’t been up here for ages. I hear the humans have done some amazing things, and I want to see them, and secure souls for our Master.”
“You know I’m the only demon with permission to be Earthside securing souls,” Crowley insisted. “You need to go!”
“I’m a Duke of Hell,” Hastur growled. “You have no power over me.”
Crowley thought about it. Hastur was mostly right. He was a Duke of Hell and Crowley wasn’t technically his boss, but on Earth Crowley was more powerful than Hastur, except that he’d just finished a long stint of particularly heinous torture in Hell. He was injured and very weak. He was pretty sure he couldn’t handle two demons in his condition, but he was desperate for them to leave.
He knew Aziraphale was going to show up any minute since he must have sensed Crowley's return to Earth, and Crowley wanted to keep him as far away from demons as he could. An instant later, Crowley sensed his angel, and cursed. Aziraphale was too close.
“An angel!” Hastur said triumphantly, leering at Crowley.
“It has to be the same one who has been making a fool of you for centuries,” he continued. “He’s why you were tortured.”
Hastur turned to Ligur.
“We could take him, then Beelzebub would know that I’m wasted down in Hell. I should be up here permanently instead of him.”
“He’s pretty strong,” the shorter demon said uncertainly, “and you don’t have the powers of a Duke on Earth.”
“There are two of us.”
“Actually, there aren’t,” Crowley said as he managed to stand, “because I’m going to stop you. Maybe I can’t defeat you both, but even in my condition, Ligur doesn’t stand a chance. That angel is mine! Don’t touch him!”
Hastur looked skeptically at Crowley, who was barely upright. He hated Crowley and had taken a great deal of pleasure in participating in his torment, so he knew how weak Crowley was. Crowley might be more powerful on Earth, but he was in bad shape and would need days, maybe weeks, to heal. This was Hastur’s chance to beat the crap out of Crowley…possibly discorporate him, and procure a sweet gig on Earth. He didn’t want to waste it.
“You’re a failure,” Hastur gloated. “That angel has made a fool of you. I think it’s time for someone else to have a go.”
He looked at Ligur.
“What do you say?”
Ligur was looking apprehensively at Crowley, sizing him up. Maybe he could beat the stronger demon in his weakened state, but why would he take the risk? There was nothing in it for him. He raised his head, and looked as if he were sniffing the air.
“Feel that?” he said, nervously. “He’s strong.”
Hastur also raised his head, and reconsidered the situation. He didn’t want to start a fight he couldn’t win, and he needed to win to convince Beelzebub he should be on Earth. If he lost, the Prince of Hell would be furious that he stayed longer than permitted, and nobody wanted Beelzebub angry at them.
“We could take him, but why bother?” he said, finally. “Let’s leave this pathetic excuse for a demon to the angel to deal with. I can’t think of a better punishment.”
Both demons vanished, Crowley collapsed, and reverted to his snake form before he hit the ground. A moment later, Aziraphale gathered him into his arms, and, despite everything, the demon was in Heaven.
---
The storms are raging on the rolling sea
And on the highway of regret
The winds of change are blowing wild and free
You ain't seen nothing like me yet
---
Aziraphale watched Crowley walk into the cave, arrange his cloak near the fire and morph into his snake form. He knew the demon wasn’t being honest with him, but he had no right to pry. They’d known each other for eons, but the angel still didn’t know how to characterize their relationship. They’d had a lot of good times, and a couple of very serious disagreements, but Crowley was the one constant in his existence on Earth. The angel sighed as he recalled one of his favorite memories of time spent with Crowley.
---
Rome 41 AD
He was in Rome, which had been his favorite haunt for centuries. The wine and food were excellent, and everything was so civilized. He sensed Crowley when he came into the city and knew where to find him, but pretended to be surprised. The demon looked so despondent as he sat at the bar, Aziraphale wondered what was wrong. He knew Crowley wouldn’t tell him the truth, but maybe he could cheer him up a bit.
He'd stepped in it at first.
“Still a demon, then?”
What on Earth was he thinking? That was such an idiotic thing to say, and Aziraphale blushed after all this time. Fortunately, Crowley let him off the hook pretty quickly and agreed to try oysters for the first time, which was a big deal because the demon rarely ate. Not much had changed, though because Crowley only choked down one oyster before moving strictly to wine, leaving the rest to the angel.
---
Aziraphale smiled. They’d had a generally cordial relationship, each doing his best to meet quotas and thwart the other, but Rome was the first time the angel recognized that he had more in common with the demon than he did with the angels in Heaven, who tended to make faces when he tried to talk to them about humans. At least, Crowley got his jokes and could appreciate his stories.
The demon was also surprisingly funny after he’d had a couple of drinks, and seemed to enjoy the angel’s company as well. Aziraphale relished the times when Crowley finally relaxed. Those were the only times he ever saw the demon laugh, and the angel loved that laugh. He couldn’t remember what he’d said that was so funny at Petronius’ restaurant, but Crowley threw his head back and laughed out loud. It was contagious, although the other patrons might not have found it so, and Aziraphale joined him. He was sorry when he had to go, and Crowley seemed disappointed, but he couldn’t be seen with his mortal enemy.
They’d met several more times after that, and not simply for biblical events, but that was to be expected, right? It would be odd if they hadn’t seen each other when they were on Earth together for thousands of years. There were so many memories.
Aziraphale sipped his tea and stared sadly at the stars Crowley hung, but couldn’t see. He thought about the demon and their time together. Crowley was often ill-tempered and impatient, and did tempt humans to Hell, but he was selective, and he didn’t push. He never approached the poor or helpless. He liked to concentrate on what he called the “high-zoot souls”, but even then he’d merely offer the humans a choice. They usually chose wrong, but that was on them.
Crowley loved humans, and had taken great risks for them. He was a demon, certainly, but he was more compassionate than the angels Aziraphale knew, and he was never unkind. The angel wished, as he often did, that they had met under different circumstances. They could have been such good friends, but he had to keep the relationship “strictly business” for both of their sakes.
---
I could make you happy, make your dreams come true
Nothing that I wouldn't do
Go to the ends of the Earth for you
To make you feel my love
---
The angel sighed, sad for what could have been. Inside the cave, a demon did the same.