Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

San doesn’t believe in soulmates. He despises the idea that someone in the world was perfectly made for him - as if the universe knew him better than he knew himself. Yeah, right. 

San wished things were more simple - he wished people could just fall in love. He trusted himself more than the universe. But, it seems like he was the only one.

You see, things were difficult for soulmate-hating San, especially in a world where your soulmates shared the same soulmark on their skin. The soulmarks match and alter in appearance when soulmates show their marks to one another - confirming they were soulmates.

So, San was determined to keep his mark covered at all times, always wearing long sleeves to cover his forearm - even in the heat of the summer. Luckily, it was proper etiquette for people to keep their marks covered, unless they were fully matched - and most times people had marks in less accessible places like their back or thigh...

San always looked at his soulmark with disdain. He had a compass with an hourglass - the compass had eight star outlines around the edges and the compass arrow would switch directions, supposedly to point in the direction of his nearest soulmates. 

Over the years, San watched as the stars slowly started filling in - from just an outline to a filled black star - but he didn’t pay much attention to it. As of now, there are six filled black stars - which means six of his soulmates had met one another. 

And, more power to them, as long as they stayed away from him.

San - well he was perfectly content with his life in this small town by the sea. Thank you very much.

He worked hard all of his life, at miscellaneous jobs throughout the years, until he raised enough money to purchase a shop near the town square, just beside the fountain. 

He liked their town. And, he loved plants. So, opening a flower shop seemed like the perfect opportunity.

As the years went by, San built the perfect routine. Wake up, make breakfast, head downstairs to open the store, talk to the flowers throughout the day - his reliable friends -, fulfill any bouquet or other orders, close the shop, make dinner, go to sleep. 

Sometimes he would visit Wooyoung at his grandpa’s bookstore. Sometimes he would go down to the shore. But, mainly, San stuck to his perfect routine. 

San’s life was quiet.

It was peaceful. 

It was calm. 

It wasn’t anything fancy, but it was exactly what San wanted . And, he never thought about the compass on his arm - never even bothered to look at it when he was changing or showering. No - it didn’t matter to him. Besides, the compass had only ever pointed North - never wavering. 

Everything was going perfectly fine in San’s life - until.

Until - a tattoo parlor decided to open a shop just next door.

San’s life was quiet. Until the tattoo shop decided to blare their hard metal music playlist.

It was peaceful. Until the tattoo shop’s owner opened his mouth.

It was calm. Until the tattoo shop turned his whole life upside down.

~~

In the midst of winter, on a day where the grey sky yearned for the sun, the shop next to San’s was alive with unexpected noise. 

He was working through his daily routine, watering the flowers and asking them about their day, when at 11am, a strong thumping emerged from the right wall. It took San a few moments to realize it was a beat and some people in the world might even refer to that beat as ‘music.’

The flowers, always temperamental, seemed to lean to the right, away from the obnoxious noise. 

San rolled his eyes and tried to continue his work. After about 3 minutes, the beats died down. 

Thank goodness. 

As quickly as it stopped, though, another - different - beat emerged. The next ‘song’ one might say.

And, with that, he hears a small cheer and the sounds get ever louder. 

A fan favorite?

San sighs. It was going to be a long day.

San knew that the shop next door had been sold - the old Mr. Kim had been looking to sell for a couple years now that his wife had passed. 

San also knew that it was purchased by a group that was new to town. He had seen a couple of them briefly unloading some trucks from his living room window above the shop. But, he only spared a glance - wondering how many of them there were … five? Six? 

Rumor was that they were all soulmates - although a size like that didn’t phase people much. The town was ever-growing, with newer and bigger families and soulmate groups coming and going over the years. 

Lastly, San knew that it was a tattoo shop, through the inquisitive deduction of the signage. Of course, that already was a red flag in his book - why add more markings to your skin when the first was already a curse ?

But, he had done his best over the past few weeks to steer clear of the moving, and renovating, and new greetings. He knew he would meet the tenant next door eventually, but he didn’t want to interrupt his perfect routine just yet.

But, this ‘music’ - this hard metal - would become a problem to San’s perfect routine. And, quickly.

San vowed to give it a day - maybe the music was an opening-day celebration? 

~~

It’s been just over a week and the ‘music’ seemed to get worse and worse - louder and louder - harder and harder. 

So, on Friday morning, when the music started at 10am instead of 11am - their new opening time due to a boom in business (why did everyone in this town want a tattoo suddenly?) San decided that he had had enough.

He threw down his broom, hopped over the bags of soil littered around the ground, and moved towards the door. He quickly stomped over to the front door of the tattoo parlor and stormed in. He was assaulted by a sharp, fake coconut smell, which had him scrunching his nose in disgust.

It took him a moment to adjust to the scene around him - he hadn’t seen the shop since the renovations. Mr. Kim’s old tea shop had drastically transformed into a full tattoo parlor, with black chairs lining both walls, hundreds of music albums and drawings in ornate frames stocking the walls. 

He also noticed subtle pirate-themed ornamentations: swords on the back wall, netting covering the front desk, a model ship and globe on the side desk. 

Why did these guys love pirates so much?

San is still taking in the scenery, when he hears someone clear their throat. Truthfully, he can barely hear it over the blaring ‘music.’ He turns to the counter and his annoyance and anger return full fledged. 

He sees a short red-haired man sitting behind the front desk, feet up on the counter. He noticed another taller man with fluffy blonde hair cleaning a station nearby. They both wear matching black t-shirts with a giant doodle wave in the middle. Both give San a pointed look. 

San points to his ears and then at the speakers - which have skull stickers on them - littered in the corners of the room. The red-haired man rolls his eyes and slowly picks up his phone to pause the music. As the sound stops, San takes a deep breath and feels like he can finally live again.

“Got an appointment?” the red-haired man asks, tilting his head. San notices some smaller tattoos peeking out from under his t-shirt on his neck - they are small, but intricate - stars? 

He briefly gives San a once over and scrunches his nose. San only then realizes how he must look - with his apron, covered in soil, with a permanent scowl - definitely not someone here for a tattoo.

“No - I’m actually here to formally ask you to turn down your music,” San says strongly.

“And, why would I do that, sunshine ?” the man asks, taking his feet down from the counter, leaning towards San with a smirk. San rolls his eyes at the nickname.

“It’s disturbing my work - and my flowers,” San responds, standing tall.

“Ahh, so you are our next door neighbor? We were wondering when you might peek over here,” the man responds, smirk growing and growing. San gives him an exasperated look, the fluffy blonde staying silent - San notices tattoos snaking down the man’s arms, all the way to his wrists.

“This past week has been torture. The music is scaring my customers away and I can hardly think straight, let alone work,” San replies. He wasn’t peeking.

The red-haired man sits back in his chair and puts his feet back up on the counter.

“If you don’t like the noise, sunshine, you are more than welcome to wear earplugs,” he says before grabbing his phone and pressing play. 

San scoffs in disbelief at the man’s disrespect. He looks to the other man, who seems to want to say something, but holds back. The red-haired man keeps his eyes on San, as if wondering what he will do next. 

“And, what about my flowers?” San says, but the music drowns it out. The red-haired man shrugs. 

San turns and storms out, knowing he needs to regroup and strategize for next time.

San might have lost the battle, but he will win the war.

~~

In reality, San doesn’t know what to do about his predicament. And, frankly, things do get better. After the initial boom of customers their opening few weeks, things slow down and the tattoo parlor moves to a 12 pm starting schedule. 

At least San and his flowers had peaceful mornings. 

After San’s run in with the supposed owner, he knew that the man was now just testing him, blaring the music louder and louder each day, as if trying to lure him back in for another battle. But, San tried to remain calm and not take the bait.

One day, surprisingly, two employees from the tattoo parlor show up. San only knows by the wave doodles on their shirts. He stops sweeping and stands in high alert.

They both freeze upon seeing him and the shorter one raises his hands up.

“We come in peace,” he says. San gives a slight nod and they relax.

“We actually partially came to apologize for last week. Yunho told us that you and Hongjoong butted heads over the volume of our music,” the taller man says timidly - like the other tall boy from the shop, his wrists are fully inked and San almost wonders what his arms must look like below his long sleeve shirt. Almost .

“Hongjoong can be a bit of an ass at first glance - and hard set in his ways. Sometimes, his music choice is even a bit too hard-core for me,” the shorter one said with a shrug and a half smile. Unlike his counterpart, San couldn’t see a tattoo in sight. Not that he was searching.

San stays still, soaking in all of this information. He hadn’t expected anyone to apologize to him - not in a million years. 

Suddenly, a strong beat emerges from the wall across the shop. San looks at the clock on the wall and it reads noon. Opening time.

“Wow, that is quite loud,” the taller one supplies with a slight wince.

“No kidding,” San finally speaks.

“We are here for an olive branch. We wanted to meet you on nicer terms and start our stay in the village on good footing. Even if Hongjoong is going to be an asshole, I promise that the rest of us won’t - I’m Jongho and this is Mingi, for starters,” the shorter one begins.

“We can try and turn down the music when he isn’t around and do our best to respect your shop. And, maybe we can buy some flowers to hopefully offset the bad business,” the taller one - Mingi - continues.

San rolls his eyes. The beat from the other side of the wall continues to blare.

“It really is loud, isn’t it?” the Mingi remarks.

San just nods and shrugs and the others let out a laugh.

“The name’s San… So, what would you like?” San asks, clapping his hands together.

“Oh - well, we know nothing about flowers,” Mingi explains, cheeks flushing a deep red. 

“Or any plants in general,” Jongho seems to be blushing too.

“Is that so? Well, let’s see what I conjure up, shall we?” San says with a devilish grin. This would be fun.

“Since your captain calls me sunshine , let’s gather some yellow. To make sure he remembers it’s from me, yeah? Some birds-foot trefoil, maybe?” San explains, grabbing the yellow flower from its vase in the back, conjuring his plan in real time.

“And, I see your theme is pirates - so, let’s try and pick a plant related to long journey’s at sea. How about something mythic? Here is Helen’s flower - named after Helen of Troy from the Odyssey,” San says, taking a deep breath before opening the glass case on the back wall. 

He makes sure he doesn’t breathe in until the flowers are wrapped in plastic and he’s handing them to Mingi and taking some cash from Jongho.

“This is a beautiful bouquet. Thank you so much, San. We promise we will be back,” Jongho says, mesmerized by the bouquet. 

“I hope to see you both soon. Now, hand that directly to your captain, Hongjoong, and make sure he is the first to get a deep whiff of it, okay?” San says with a smile. The pair nod and say their goodbyes. 

It’s only five minutes later, when San hears deep sneezes over the sound of the blaring music does he finally take a deep breath and laugh . He hopes that they can hear him. 

Helen’s flower. Helenium. More commonly known as sneezeweed. 

His Trojan horse. 

Birds-food trefoil - symbolizing revenge. 

Yes, San had won the battle. This time. 

~~

Mingi and Jongho continue to visit the shop frequently, sometimes to get flowers, more often to hang out with San. And, San had to admit that although they were associated with the annoying tattoo parlor next door, they did make great company.

They thought San’s original prank was hilarious. And, apparently it had San’s archenemy - Hongjoong - fuming for a week. 

San promised he wouldn’t pull a prank like that again and instead started making bouquets with beautiful scents. 

“I’ll give you new scents everyday, just please stop using that wretched coconut air freshener - the flowers and I hate it,” San shuddered, which made the pair laugh and laugh and laugh. 

“Give us more lavender. Joongie liked that one best,” Jongho replied. This time, San was the one who blushed.

Over the weeks, San learns more about the pair and the rest of the folks next door. True to the rumor mill, the six boys next door were indeed soulmates.

Must not be finished, if their matching soulmate tattoos weren’t out on display. Not that San was looking, or anything.

Mingi was almost fully tatted, as San thought on their first interaction. Sometimes he had his sleeves rolled up and would notice San staring. He would explain a couple tattoos (a crown, colorful hearts, some lyrics) and San would pretend to feign disinterest. 

Jongho, on the other hand, admitted to not having one tattoo other than his soulmark.

“Tattoos are meaningful - I’m still searching for the right meaning before I get another one ,” Jongho explained. Mingi laughed and ruffled the younger one’s hair. But, San nodded meaningfully at the younger and tried to convey his understanding through his gaze.

They noticed that San didn’t mention anything about soulmates or soulmarks, so they steered clear of such conversations. 

San also learned more about their soulmate group, bit by bit, piece by piece. He didn’t know all of their names, but he knew strange pieces of information about all of them. Of the time one of them filled the bathtub with slime… of the largest cake one of them had baked for their anniversary… of the one who was terrified of parrots… 

Yes, San enjoyed the stories. He enjoyed his time with the pair. He enjoyed making bouquets - including lavender everytime now. 

The pair even invited him over for dinner a couple of times, to meet the others , but San refused each time. He had his routine. And, yes, Mingi and Jongho were part of that routine now, but San didn’t want to stray too far from normalcy . No thank you.

~~

And, his feud with their lovely captain continued. He continued to blare his music and San would take to wacking his broom against the wall when the music was beyond horrible.

San took to finding more ways to prank the store - harmless of course.

On days his shop was closed - when he was restocking and repotting the flowers - he would leave flowers that attracted the most bees - aster, bee balm, borage, coneflower - just outside the shop and as close to the parlor door as possible - to allow them to bask in the sunshine, of course, nothing more . He smiled as customers squealed at the attack of bees while leaving the parlor, exclaiming they would never be back. 

Similarly, the town cat had finally found its newest prey, always hanging around the alleyway near the parlor’s exit. San found himself dumping his leftover fish bits in his lovely neighbors trash can as often as he could - loving the frustrated captain’s voice trying to shoo the cat every morning, noon, and night.

It was the small things that infuriated the captain next door. And, it was those same small things that brought San the greatest satisfaction.

~~

Anyone who lived in town knew Wooyoung. Most people who lived in town had a crush on Wooyoung one time or another in their lives.

It was just that San’s crush on Wooyoung seemed to last before, during, and after his rejection from the boy. And, yet, it didn’t stop San from staying in Wooyoung’s orbit. 

Once you were in his orbit, especially within his gaze, nothing else seemed to matter. At least, that’s how San felt. 

Wooyoung helped run his grandpa’s bookstore just North of the town square, right up the cobblestone street. 

And, as mentioned, San had a longstanding crush on Wooyoung - who doesn’t have a crush on Wooyoung?  

San had professed his love a couple of years back and was rejected since Wooyoung said he was waiting for his soulmates.

“San, I hope you can understand. It’s not personal,” Wooyoung said, a harsh crease in his lovely eyebrows.

“No - no, of course. I should’ve known. I’ve heard you say that to others, I should’ve known better than to confess. It’s just a silly crush,” San stumbled upon his words, playing with his fingers to avoid Wooyoung’s gaze.

“It’s not silly. Hey, San, what if we - could I see your soulm-,” Wooyoung began but San was already out the door.

But, that didn’t stop the pair from being close. Sometimes San chose to deviate from his routine and visit the bookstore - of course to pick up a new novel, but mainly to spend time with Wooyoung. 

The pair were known to hole up in the back of the bookstore, hidden amongst the piles and piles of books, and giggle over tea and picture books. Sometimes San would walk Wooyoung through plant anthologies - sometimes Wooyoung would share mythological adventures. 

Yes, it had been awkward for a moment, but San cherished his friendship with Wooyoung over mostly anything else in the world. Except maybe his plants, he assumed.

The one thing the friends could never agree on was soulmates. 

“And, then, the princess looked over and saw the intricate flower snaking its way down the mystery suitor's arm and felt her heart burst with color. She had finally found her one true love and finally knew what happiness felt like in his eyes, ” Wooyoung reads from a children's storybook. 

“But, she was so excited to marry the wizard, like one page ago. What happened to her love for him?” San grumbled, confused by the sudden twist of fate. Wooyoung tsk’ed and nudged San.

“Oh, hush. It’s soulmates. It’s so much bigger than anything else in the world,” Wooyoung explained, as if the term ‘soulmates’ made everything make sense. San rolled his eyes, but basked in the warmth of Wooyoung’s shoulder next to his.

Yes, San was perfectly fine living in Wooyoung’s orbit… loving him from afar… cherishing their friendship. 

Until one day.

San had been on his way to the bookstore, for another afternoon of tea and chit-chat with Wooyoung when he stopped short at the fountain. There, exiting the bookstore, hand-in-hand was Wooyoung with a stunning man that San had never seen before.

It wasn’t uncommon for San to not recognize somebody - people always coming and going in town - and he was always in his routine. But, this was different. Wooyoung was holding his hand and staring at him like he was the only man in the universe. 

Wooyoung must’ve finally found his soulmate.

Without even thinking, San did a spin and headed straight home to process the news.

The rumor mill did its job and San finds out from an old auntie picking up her usual weekly flowers that Wooyoung did indeed meet his soulmates .

And, of course San was happy for him. Wooyoung - the boy with an electric smile, an intoxicating laugh, a cosmic gaze - of course he deserved the world. San was happy that he finally found his storybook ending. 

~~

San stuck to his routine. 

Everytime he tried to stray, even just leaving his house to get groceries, it felt like Wooyoung and his soulmate - Yeosang he learned is his name - were there, holding hands, laughing, smiling…

So, San became more and more of a shell of himself. Even quiet when Mingi and Jongho came by to hangout and get their usual bouquets. Neither felt comfortable enough to even ask.

Even if they did ask, what would San say? 

Oh, the boy I crushed on forever but knew would never be interested in me, is finally happy?

Of course, San also briefly noticed that amongst his wallowing, his compass had filled seven of the eight stars. The arrow still firmly pointed North, but Wooyoung’s stomach twisted and ached with anxiety. 

He was perfectly happy without them, thank you very much. 

He hoped for dear life that now that they had found their seventh they wouldn’t try anything rash like coming to look for him. 

San stuck to his routine, now filled with sorrow and anxiety and wallowing. 

~~

One day, San finds himself back at the bookstore, sitting in silence flipping through a flower anthology with cold tea beside him and Wooyoung’s grandpa. 

San knew Wooyoung wasn’t at the bookstore - having seen him and Yeosang pass by his own shop - but he missed the bookstore, he missed the books, and he missed the Jung’s. Even if it was just Wooyoung’s grandpa, he would take it. 

Wooyoung’s grandpa was good at filling silence with comfort. San never felt awkward around the soft spoken and quiet-hearted man. He was such a contrast to the loud, boisterous energy of his grandson.

San stares down at the drawing of the hellebore - sorrow and pain - heartbreak - when he finally speaks.

“Is it lonelier in the store? Without Wooyoung around as much?” San asks pointedly, although trying to be nonchalant.

His grandpa looks up from his own novel, peeks over at San’s book, and seems to stare at him knowingly. 

“Quieter, yes. But, not necessarily lonelier. Especially, when I know he is happy,” he responds. San nods in response.

“We always knew this day would come,” the old man continues, slowly closing the book. San ponders on the term ‘we’ as it’s just been Wooyoung and his grandpa for many years now…

It’s then that he notices the etching in the cover of the book in the old man’s hands. The old man traces the compass with his finger, softly, but with finality. 

“You know how Wooyoung is about soulmates. Wooyoung’s compass only ever pointed in one direction most of his life - South, near the fountain by the square. But, he always dreamed of the possibilities - the fairytale ending. It started to move around more and more in recent months, so I knew he would find them sooner or later,” the old man continued, eyes never leaving the book cover.

San feels all the air leave his lungs.

“Compass?” is all San can respond. The old man nods and gives San a pointed look. If San’s heart wasn’t cracking, smashing, crumbling into a million pieces, he might’ve been able to decode the look.

But, instead, he jumps up and leaves Wooyoung’s grandpa, the books, and the cold tea behind. He feels himself on the brink of sobbing as he stumbles home.

He’s almost made it to his shop when he notices a familiar red-haired boy storm out of the tattoo parlor door and straight in front of him.

“Was it you who poured olive oil all over our door knobs so no one could enter our shop? I will say the ‘olive branch’ on the ground was a nice touch, sunshine , but this is going too far. It could’ve gotten on the floor and someone could’ve slipped and fallen,” Hongjoong fumed, his face as red as his hair. 

“Fine. Truce. I’ll stop with the pranks and you can blare your music all you want, happy?” San said, trying to hold back his tears. He tries to turn away from Hongjoong so he won’t see him falling apart, but the red-haired man’s face seems to get softer, more confused. 

“Great - but, are you okay? ” Hongjoong asks, with sincerity in his voice. San had never heard his voice soft and almost caring like that before.  

“Just dandy,” is all San can get out before brushing past the man and into his own shop.

He gets to the staircase while he finally breaks down - tears streaming down his face. 

Wooyoung’s soulmark was a compass. The same as San’s.

Wooyoung’s soulmark pointed in the direction of his nearest soulmate. It always pointed South. San’s always pointed North. 

Wooyoung was San’s soulmate. Well, one of his soulmates, at least. 

San slowly makes his way up the stairs and allows himself to collapse onto his bed and fully let out the sobs he had been holding in. 

San was Wooyoung’s soulmate. Wooyoung was his. 

And, yet. 

San thinks back over the years. To all of their days spent in the back of the bookstore. He thinks back to all of their conversations, about life and soulmates. He thinks back to the day San confessed his love.

But, then he remembers the truth. Wooyoung never saw him that way - he even rejected him all those years ago. Even if they were soulmates, it meant nothing to Wooyoung . It wouldn’t change anything. And, San shouldn’t force Wooyoung to love him. 

Soulmarks were the universe’s way of forcing love. And, Wooyoung deserved the universe and all that was beyond it. San wouldn’t force him - or anyone else - to love him against their will.  

So, San knows what he needs to do. What he’s needed to do ever since he was old enough to know what the compass on his arm meant. 

San was going to sever the bond.

Chapter Text

San’s routine was ruined.

He couldn’t think straight, couldn’t work without knocking over pots and brooms, couldn’t respond to simple questions. 

His mind was flooded with the new realization that his longtime crush - Wooyoung - as well as supposedly his six other soulmates - were close by. 

Every time San left his apartment or the shop, his anxiety would spike, wondering if a soulmate was behind every corner. Most people worried about murderers or thiefs - San’s biggest fear was having to face Wooyoung with the knowledge of what they were to one another.

Most nights, San lay awake, replaying Wooyoung’s rejection over and over again. 

Would things have been different if they realized they were soulmates? 

Something small - hope - creeped up San’s throat every once in a while. But, San, would swallow it back down, shut it in a box, and leave it to shrivel and die.

Hope was something San learned to abandon long ago. Back when his family abandoned him.

It got to the point that San didn’t leave the house and barely opened the shop at all. When he did, he only did pick up orders - only directly interacting with the mostly silent delivery boys. 

Jongho and Mingi came by - even tried to coax what was wrong out of him - but San shrugged them off, saying he was feeling under the weather.

Instead of staying away, they came back the next day with a bowl of warm soup - “It’s our partner, Seonghwa’s, world famous get-well-soon-soup. It’s never failed yet,” Mingi explained with a smile that made San’s heart melt just a bit - and everyday after with another gift. A blanket, a stuffed animal, a small basket of olives and berries and crackers.

“Hongjoong thought the olives might lift your spirits - remind you of the good old days, he said. It’s almost like he misses the prank war between you two or something,” Jongho said with a knowing smile. San thinks back and realizes that the music hasn’t been AS loud in recent days, although still booming. In regular circumstances, it would make San smile, or laugh, or maybe even blush. 

But, nothing was normal for San anymore.

He knew what he had to do. And, he knew it was going to hurt - not only himself, but his soulmates - but he knew it was for the best.

San didn’t want to get in the way of Wooyoung’s happiness. Or Yeosang. Or any of their other partners - whoever they were. So, he had to sever the bond.

~~

Two weeks after finding out the news that broke his heart, San locks up the flower shop and stumbles next door into the tattoo parlor - right at noon when they open. 

He finds the red-haired Hongjoong in his regular spot behind the front desk, feet up and reclined. The place looks the same as it did on the very first day he entered, except now a bouquet of lavender and poppy sits on the desk beside Hongjoong’s feet. Music booms through the speakers and San feels his bones vibrate.

When Hongjoong recognizes it’s San who entered, a sly smirk emerges. He prefers that to pity or any other emotion he saw on Hongjoong’s face the day he chatted with Wooyoung’s grandpa.
 
“Hey sunshine - it’s been quite a while - finally here to get inked or just to complain about our playlist choice again??” Hongjoong asks.

San sees Jongho and the tall man from the very first day - Yunho - chatting at a nearby station. Jongho stands up when he sees San, confused.

“Neither - I’m here to get a removal,” San responds, deflecting Jongho’s gaze. This peaks Hongjoong’s interest and he leans forward.

“A removal? Of what?” he asks.

“Soulmark removal. I heard from Chris that you do that,” San says. He had spent the last couple of days discreetly researching and asking around town. He had wanted to get some books on the subject - maybe even find an at-home herbal remedy - but going to the bookstore was obviously a no-go nowadays.

He sees Hongjoong’s eyes widen and he opens his mouth and closes it a few times. San is almost happy he’s rendered the man speechless, if only for a moment.

“For extreme circumstances - like when people are in dangerous situations they need to get out of, or when their soulmate dies and the mark is dormant and causes emotional distress,” Hongjoong jumps into explanations.

“Do I need to tell you a reason?” San retorts abruptly.

“I mean -,” Hongjoong starts - and San sees it emerging from the creases of his face - the pity. 

“Fine - I’ll go find somewhere else to do it,” he says, spinning on his heels.

“No - sunshine - wait. I know how much you - well - dislike our shop. So, I know that you wouldn’t be here if you really didn’t have to be. I’ll stop asking questions,” Hongjoong responds. 

San takes a deep breath - the soft lavender fills his nose - and he turns back around.

“Thank you,” San smiles tightly. San tries not to see the concern and pity and worry covering Hongjoong’s face. He much rather preferred the witty and snarky man from the beginning of the conversation.

“Jongho will show you to our back room and Yunho will go get our mark removal specialist, Seonghwa, for you,” Hongjoong says with a cough, a bit stilted, as if he wants to continue but doesn't know what to say.

San finally makes eye contact with Jongho for a split second, before staring at his shirt instead, and starts walking towards him.

Jongho starts leading him into a back room - a more private space for removals. San notices that the room is soundproof and San almost wishes - for the very first time - that he could hear the music - so it would drown away his thoughts.

“Sannie - is this really what you want? I know you don’t like to talk about soulmarks, but maybe there are other options. Just - are you really sure about this?” Jongho asks, standing still near the door as San moves further into the room to sit on the looming black table chair.

San just gives him a small smile and nods.

“I’ll be okay, Jongho. Thanks for worrying about me,” he says. And, with that, Jongho gives a small nod and leaves the room.

San is then left with his single worst enemy of the past two weeks: his thoughts.

It’s only about 10 minutes later that someone knocks on the door and yet another handsome man walks into the room - Seonghwa, the tattoo parlor’s fifth soulmate, the soulmark removal specialist. 

He’s pretty - is all San can think.

Seonghwa is dressed in the same black shirt and black pants. He sees tattoos wrapping around his ankles - a snake and a lynx - and some beautiful topography lines around his wrists.

“It’s San, right?” Seonghwa says with a soft smile. He seems to softly move through the room to sit in the chair next to San. San continues to be rendered speechless, so he just nods.

“Well, I’m Seonghwa. You might’ve already known that. It’s nice to meet you, although it would’ve been nicer in different circumstances. Mingi and Jongho have mentioned you a bit,” Seonghwa continues, his voice quite soothing.

“Thanks for the soup,” is all San can say in response. This has Seonghwa nodding, now.

“Glad you enjoyed it. I can always whip up another batch if you ever need more. I promise I’m not part of the wicked music playing outside. It’s part of the reason I soundproofed this room. Maybe I can get you my contact if you want to soundproof your walls too?” Seonghwa rambles, just a bit. 

San almost swoons, but it seems like they both realize the reason they are seated together and the reality sinks in. Silence fills the air.

“Well - how about I start by explaining the procedure to you. I assume you must know a bit since you are here, but I always like to remind my clients about the severity of the removal,” Seonghwa explains, his voice back to soft and professional. 

San just nods, feeling like if he spoke now, he might throw up.

“The act of a soulmate mark removal is a permanent endeavor. For that reason, it takes a bit longer than normal tattoo removals and it also involves more pain than usual. Not only is the ink being removed from your skin, but the magical connection between you and your soulmate or soulmates will also be severed. This can lead to continued pain after the removal is complete, like a stinging sensation - for others, it’s been described as a phantom limb of sorts or a thread floating haywire within their soul. But, I’ve heard that most symptoms, whatever they may be, go away after a couple of months or so. It’s also important to note that your soulmate or soulmates will also feel the pain and their own marks will be impacted too, if they are still alive. Does that all make sense to you?” Seonghwa asks. Again, San just nods.

He doesn’t believe in any “magic connection” connecting him to his soulmates. But, he knows that there will be some sort of pain. And, unfortunately, Yeosang and Wooyoung will also feel that pain, too. And, their other five soulmates - whoever they are. But, at the end of the day, it was for the best. 

“Alright, well, let’s take a look at the mark and I’ll be able to further assess and begin the process,” Seonghwa says, putting on gloves.

San pauses for a couple of moments. But, finally he takes a deep breath and begins rolling up his sleeve to reveal his mark. 

At that exact moment, Seonghwa seems to shrink back as if stung, taking in a sharp breath.

San looks down and sees that the compass is pointing in Seonghwa’s direction. But, San knows it’s just pointing through Seonghwa, since the bookstore is just North of here. He looks back up at Seonghwa, confused, but sees the boy has already turned away to grab more supplies from the shelves to his left. 

“Do you want to tell me a little more about your decision? If something recently happened in your life that triggered your interest in getting the removal?” Seonghwa asks, this time his voice is a bit higher and less restrained. 

Was Seonghwa okay?

“Hongjoong said that we could do this with no questions asked,” is all San hisses in response, abruptly. He feels bad the second he says it, since Seonghwa seems to flinch. 

“I don’t believe in any of this soulmate stuff, if that makes you feel better about helping me,” San tries to keep his voice softer and calmer this time around. 

Seonghwa finally turns around with wipes and San notices how pale he’s gotten.

Isn’t this guy supposed to be a professional? Why does he look like he's the one who is going to be sick? San wonders.

“Let’s begin,” Seonghwa all but whispers, touching the wipe to San’s arm. The cold wetness of the wipe is sharp. 

San sees that there are now tears brimming at Seonghwa’s eyes and he decides that maybe he should find someone else. But, before he can do anything, he hears the door creak and someone bursts into the room.

“Hwa, I need to tell you a hilarious story - oh shit I didn’t know you had a client,” a boy San’s only seen from a distance says as he floats into the room. The boy has a youthful grin, but the smile fades into embarrassment and confusion, quickly, as he makes eye contact with San.

Yeosang. 

San is confused, because he didn’t realize that Yeosang knew the owners of the Tattoo Parlor. He had never seen him around this part of town - unless he was with Wooyoung passing by his shop occasionally.  

He only has a moment to soak in the presence of Yeosang in such close proximity - to notice his strong muscles, his sharp jawline, his soft red facial birthmark - until he realizes the compromising position he is in.

San is laying on the Tattoo Parlor table - his shirt sleeve rolled up - his soulmate mark on display. 

Yeosang’s soulmate mark. 

San watches in horror as he sees Yeosang’s eyes move down to hone in on the mark. 

San immediately tries to cover it, but knows that he is too late.

Yeosang knows the truth. 

“What are you doing? You were just going to let him remove it?” Yeosang screeches.

But, San is confused, because he doesn’t know who the questions are directed at. Yeosang is now staring directly at Seonghwa, who seems to be openly crying now and at a loss for words.

It’s then he notices that Yeosang is wearing the same shirt as Seonghwa. Black with the Tattoo Parlors wave logo on it.

Yeosang and Seonghwa are both employees here. 

Does that mean Yeosang is a part of their group? 

Does that mean they are all soulmates?

“I should go,” San says, sitting up and starting to roll down his sleeve. He’ll get it removed somewhere else…

“Don’t go. Please - look,” Yeosang moves closer into the room, rolling up his sleeve to reveal a matching soulmate mark, a compass now with eight filled stars. 

Once both soulmate marks are exposed, the tattoo completes itself. 

San looks down in horror at the eighth star filled on his own skin too. 

So, he abruptly rolls the sleeve down the rest of the way.

“I - I can’t do this. I just wanted to make it easier for Wooyoung,” San says, his breathing picking up. San stands up to head for the door.

“You knew? And, you still wanted to remove it?” Seonghwa sobs, standing up too. 

“I didn’t know it was you - all of you. Just Wooyoung. I thought he would be better off without me,” San says, with tears now streaming down his face. 

They are all his soulmates. 

Yeosang. Seonghwa. Wooyoung. Jongho. Mingi. Yunho. Even Hongjoong. 

And, he had just been about to make Seonghwa remove his own soulmate’s mark. 

San’s a monster. 

The pair move towards him but he steps away.

He sees the door still ajar and sprints through it, past Jongho and the others who seem to question his running, past the blaring speakers, past the lavender, and through the door. 

He runs and runs and runs until he reaches the sea. 

The wind rushes through his ears and he cherishes the immensity of nature drowning out his thoughts, his feelings, and anything in between.

~~

San stays by the water until dark, sitting with his feet in the sand, tracing shapes into his knees as he watches the waves crash and recede.

Back and forth. In and out. Over and over.

The waves were consistent. They had a rhythm, they eventually ended up back in the same position. Even if it took a while, the waves crashed in a system - an order - a reason.

Love - it didn’t have a reason. And, it could be wrong, sometimes.

But, gravity and waves and their rhythm - that was real. That was science. That was all San could understand and believe.

He feels his arm tingling, but he assumes he’s just imagining things. He had never felt anything from the mark before. Maybe that changes once you meet your soulmates and share marks?

Damn Yeosang for finding out.

Damn Seonghwa for not locking the door. 

Damn the universe for putting him in this predicament.

He feels a gush of wind shake him to his bones and he knows that he has to go home or he will actually get sick out here.

Then he will really need Seonghwa’s soup. Although the offer is probably rescinded. Not like San will ever talk to any of them again, anyway.

Now, they all know the truth. Himself included.

Truthfully, he doesn’t know how to feel. Confused, conflicted, angry, sorrowful… all of the above?

All San knows is that he needs to figure out where and how to get the mark removed, for real this time, and move on. Build a new routine - maybe someone else in some other town, if he needs to.

When he reaches his store, he remembers he had already locked up in the morning before heading next door.

He goes around the back to the stairs leading up to his apartment. He briefly peeks next door and sees the lights on upstairs - but he ignores them and runs upstairs, locking the door firmly behind him.

It’s only when he is safely in his bed and has his covers pulled tightly over his head, does he feel safe. 

Exhaustion seeps out of him.

Sleep comes to him quickly.

~~

He keeps the shop closed the next couple of days.

Stays in his apartment, mainly under the covers.

Truth be told, sitting by the sea without even so much as a jacket did cause him to have a slight sore throat and runny nose. But, that was the least of his issues.

So, he wallows and over thinks and worries as the days pass.

He ignores the fervent knocks on the door downstairs.

He ignores the consistent doorbell chimes throughout the days.

He ignores the buzzing under his skin - as if the soulmate mark is trying to communicate with him.

He ignores it all and wonders when and how and what he was going to do next.

~~

It’s three in the morning and someone is throwing rocks at San’s window.

His freaking window. Was this a silly romantic comedy?

Nothing that could do damage - little pebbles at most - but, enough that he is still awake and annoyed.

He knows who it must be - they do live next door. They must be just outside - why are they out there in the cold? 

But, San has no desire to talk to them. No desire to do anything much, nowadays. But, he knows that he won’t sleep - and neither will they - if he doesn’t just talk to them.

“I’m trying to sleep,” San hisses, finally rushing over to the window and pushing it open. 

A pebble comes flying into his room and he hears a soft “sorry.” 

He looks and sees three faces looking up at him from their back alleyway.. Jongho, Mingi, and Yunho. He tries not to commit their expressions to memory and he hopes he doesn’t look as bad as he feels. But, he knows that’s probably impossible.

“Were you ever going to talk to us? Now that you know?” Jongho asked, a blanket of innocence masked with hurt across his face. 

San sighs. He knew that he was probably hurting Jongho and Mingi the most - the two he had grown closest to over the last few months. And, truthfully, he had grown very attached to them and he couldn’t deny that he may have been developing feelings for the pair. 

But, it doesn't matter now. He hurt Seonghwa - he probably hurt them all in some way - and all that was left to do was finish severing the bond.

“I don’t know. I’m just too confused. And, Wooyoung already rejected me. So, does any of it even matter?” San responds robotically.

“That was before he knew that you were soulmates. Hey, please just give him - and us - a chance to talk with you?” Mingi all but begs. 

San can see Yunho just behind them and his face is so puppy-dog-like it makes San want to break right then.

“What’s the point?” San retorts.

“At least let us try to show you what it means to be soulmates. I know you are fully disillusioned on the whole universe-chosen-soulmate-thing, but at least give us a shot at being friends again? And, maybe it’ll grow into something more?” Jongho responds. 

San wants to look away. He wants to shut the window tight and go to bed. He would gladly take a thousand rocks against windows then continue to listen to the hurt in Jongho and Mingi’s voices. 

But, he knows that it’s seven against one. Even if he closes the window now, they will just think of another scheme. 

It’s better to get the conversation over with sooner than later - have them understand he will never be interested in anything related to soulmates - explain his reasons for breaking their bond…

“Lunch - tomorrow. Just to talk - and then no more rocks at windows. Now, please go inside before you catch a cold,” San huffs and closes the window before he can hear an answer.

The pebbles stop, but he thinks he hears one or two cheers before sleep takes over.

~~

San anxiously fiddles with the bouquet in his hands as he waits for someone to get the door.

White and yellow chrysanthemums. For goodbyes. A few lavenders. Not because Hongjoong likes them - only because they contrast nicely with the yellow.

It’s Mingi who answers the door, Jongho tailing right behind.

“You came,” Mingi says, hope dawning over his face. San clears his throat.

“Uh - yeah, I came,” he responds. 

No one moves, so San just holds out the flowers. Mingi takes them and gives them a sniff.

“Are you going to make him stand outside all day?” he hears a voice say from up the stairs. He looks and sees bright red hair. This pushes Mingi and Jongho into action, grabbing San and all but tugging him inside. He toes off his shoes and they are dragging up the stairs into their apartment.  

Hongjoong is there, taking the flowers from Mingi to put them in a vase. Upon glancing at the flowers up close, something in Hongjoong’s face falls and he quickly makes eye contact with San before rushing away. San feels sick. Does Hongjoong know the meaning behind the flowers?

“Welcome San. We’re glad you came,” a voice to his left says. He turns and sees Seonghwa in an apron, stirring a pot on the stove, but staring directly into San’s soul.

“Do you like dumpling stew? That’s what we are making, but we can make something else if you prefer. Do you like noodles in black bean sauce? Or something else? It’s no trouble. Also, we haven’t met properly - I’m Yunho,” the other tall man in the kitchen says. He has a huge smile on his face, so different than the night before through the window.

“Dumpling stew is my favorite - thanks - nice to meet you properly,” San responds - he’s overwhelmed. 

“Told you it was his favorite,” a voice says from the living room. San turns and sees him. 

Wooyoung. Sitting on the couch next to Yeosang. But, he’s crossing his arms and looking out the open window, obviously avoiding direct interaction with San. Yeosang looks conflicted and stoic, holding Wooyoung’s hand, obviously trying to mediate.

Even angry, Wooyoung was glowing - ethereal. 

“I’m Yeosang - also nice to meet you properly,” Yeosang says, slightly smiling, but it doesn’t reach his eyes.

“Hi Yeosang. Um- hi Wooyoung,” San all but whispers, shuffling awkwardly from foot to foot. Wooyoung doesn’t respond - doesn’t even so much as glance his way.

“Why don’t you take a seat while we finish cooking?” Yunho jumps in. Mingi and Jongho lead him to the dining table and sit across from him. Hongjoong comes and places the flowers, now in a vase, onto the table, taking a seat at the head.

No one speaks. There are just sounds of water boiling from the kitchen, birds chirping outside the open window, San tapping his hand on the table in nervousness. And, soft orchestral music?

“Much better music choice up here,” San says, and immediately wants the ground to swallow him whole. He just arrived - why is he picking fights with Hongjoong?

But, much to his surprise, Hongjoong just lets out a laugh.

“It’s Seonghwa’s pick. I’m not allowed to play my music in the house. Only downstairs,” Hongjoong explains. And, that has everyone laughing, even San. 

Things are going to be fine.

They all manage to make small talk until lunch is ready and they all gather around the table.

Seonghwa immediately grabs San’s bowl and fills it to the top with stew and dumplings. Frankly, it’s overflowing.

“Thank you, Seonghwa. And, Yunho,” San says timidly, staring in awe at the dumplings.

“Eat all of it so I can serve you seconds,” Seonghwa says, immediately moving on to serve Mingi, giving San little time to rebut. 

“Making food for others is Seonghwa’s love language,” Jongho leans over and whispers with a small chuckle. 

Love. San knows Jongho didn’t mean it, but it makes him shudder.

He immediately dives in and can’t help the large moan that leaves his mouth upon tasting the juicy pork and veggies when he bites into the first dumpling.

The rest let out small laughs and Seonghwa’s ears turn red at the all-but-spoken compliment. 

Things are going fine.

They eat and continue their small talk. They ask San about his plants. How he came to own the shop. His interests outside of work. 

They steer clear of questions about soulmates, their situation, and anything close to the true reason San was sitting there with them today. 

He, in turn, tries to be cordial and ask them questions too. He was interested in knowing where they all grew up, what their passions were outside of work, their favorite places in the town…

“And, I’ve been dying to know since Mingi and Jongho told me: who put slime in the bathtub and who is terrified of parrots?” San asks, which has everyone except Wooyoung and Yeosang doubling over with laughter. 

But, he steers clear of questions about soulmates. How they found one another, how they came to move here, how they found Wooyoung… what they wanted to do next… 

“If you haven’t been to the sea yet, you must go. It’s the best place in town besides the bookshop,” San says timidly, gulping down his final dumpling of his third helping. 

He says it to see Wooyoung’s reaction. The boy had continued his silent treatment, focusing on eating, never making eye contact with anyone, frankly. But, Wooyoung doesn’t so much as flinch. 

Hongjoong realizes what San must be trying to do. So, he decides to help. 

“Wooyoung mentioned you were a regular there… that you two have known each other for quite some time… he even said you were mini-menaces always laughing in the back of the normally quiet shop,” Hongjoong softly says, peeling his eyes to stare at Wooyoung too.

“Yeah, I thought we were friends before San somehow found out we were soulmates and decided to rip out the connection between our souls without even telling me,” Wooyoung hissed, still looking down at his plate.

Ah, so that’s how it’s going to be…

“Woo, you know how I feel about soulmates. I was only trying to-,” San begins, but abruptly quiets when Wooyoung glares up at him with deep disgust. 

“You liked me before you knew we were soulmates. You even asked me out. Doesn’t that mean anything? Maybe the universe does get things right?” Wooyoung all but screams. 

“You shouldn’t need a crutch of the universe to make huge decisions like love. You literally rejected me,” San raises his voice to match Wooyoung’s. He doesn’t dare to look at anyone else. He doesn’t want to see their reactions. He’s maybe even a bit scared.

“That’s not fair. You just hate soulmates -  just because you are a Choi -” Wooyoung begins but bites his tongue.

This makes San see red. 

“Finish what you were going to say… Just because I’m a Choi and my Mom left my dads - her two soulmates - for some other random man… Just because my Dad also fell apart and left because of the heartbreak… Just because my Father treated me like shit because it was just the two of us…- Just because of all of that, I don’t believe in soulmates. Is that so hard to believe? If it were you, would you feel any different?” San screams out. 

San didn’t need a tragic reason to hate soulmates, but he had one. 

It’s been a while since San thought about this past… thought about the root causes of his initial hatred for soulmates. Over time, he learned to justify it with realism and cynicism. But, it had all started with his family. His broken mess of a family… 

And, of course Wooyoung knew. Everyone who had been in town at the time knew. They saw it, first hand. 

But, the others at the table - Hongjoong and Seonghwa and Mingi and Jongho and Yeosang and Yunho… they must have had no idea… At least they have an explanation now to the mess that San is… 

And, they were all silent, so San continued.

“If being soulmates mattered at all - don’t you think our feelings for each other would’ve trumped whatever soulmate-frenzee you cared so much about? Have you ever thought about that? Because that’s all I’ve been thinking about since the truth came out,” San finished with a deep breath. He sees Wooyoung flinch.

“And, how did you find out? How long have you been planning to do this to me?” Wooyoung questioned. His voice was weaker this time, like all of San’s questions were foiling Wooyoung’s anger. Like he was sinking in sadness… in defeat… 

“Your grandpa mentioned the compass. Last time I was at the shop,” San replies honestly, his tone softer too. He didn’t like to yell or fight, either.

“That must’ve been weeks ago. Why didn’t you just talk to me?” Wooyoung practically begged for an answer. At that, San is silent, looking down at his empty bowl.

“Did you really not realize it was us?” Mingi chimed in. San looks up and sees the hurt from the night before on his face.

“Only Yeosang. And, I had never seen him at the parlor before the day I -,” San begins but Wooyoung jumps in, anger back full force.

“Before the day you tried to rip my soul - all of our souls - apart for no reason other than your own selfishness. Did you ever think about the fact that you almost made Seonghwa rip his own soul apart?” Wooyoung practically screeched. Immediately tears started to build up in San’s eyes. He looks over at Seonghwa, who now seems to have tears in his eyes too.

“I didn’t know Seonghwa was my soulmate - I would’ve never intentionally tried to hurt him or any of you. That was never my intention - I promise. I just - Wooyoung I know you’ve adored soulmates all of your life. I know how special it is to you. So, I knew it was for the best to just sever the bond - because I could never live up to those expectations. I would never throw myself at my supposed soulmates just because the universe told me to - it’s complete and utter crap. You can’t let the universe control your life,” San explains on and on.

“But, you liked me! And, I liked you back!” Wooyoung all but screamed and then froze, as if surprised that he let his own secret out.

“What? But, you rejected me,” San says confusedly.

“I did - because I didn’t know we were soulmates. But, after you left, all I could think about was how much I enjoyed spending time with you. And, I was going to ask to see your soulmark before you left the shop… You had me doubting everything I believed about the universe and soulmates. And, now it turns out we actually are soulmates and you don’t want us to be - and I’ve never been more confused in my whole life,” Wooyoung explained through his tears, and San couldn’t look away. 

This was news to San and had him sprouting new tears. Wooyoung liked him back? Or, at least, he had before San tried to remove his soulmark? Why didn’t Wooyoung ever tell him?

“I am sorry that I hurt all of you by my actions. But, I came here today to say my goodbyes. Because I think you all deserve that. I still plan on removing my soulmark - but I’ll move out of town to make things easier on you all. I’m too cynical to play into the ‘universe brought us together’ stuff you all believe. But, I know that you all deserve all the love in the world. Especially you, Wooyoung. You are kind and thoughtful and sweet - even if you never forgive me, know that I always meant to ensure your eventual happiness - which means I need to leave,” San explains. This was what he had planned on saying all along. 

His eyes don’t leave Wooyoung, but he sees Mingi and Jongho crying out of the corner of his eyes. He knows this will hurt them the most - him leaving. But, it was for the best.

“Look, sunshine, we didn’t invite you here to fight. We just wanted to get to know you. To try and be friends. Can we try that? Before you skip town?” Hongjoong asks. 

Finally, San looks away from Wooyoung to catch Hongjoong’s gaze. There is something hopeful there. He had never seen that from the owner of the shop - the man who terrorized him and his plants - the man who constantly played into his prank wars - the man who pitied him. Hope? That was new. And, it had something that San once thought long gone and dead blooming deep in his chest. 

Friendship. He could do that. He could try that.

San softly nodded and before he could say anything more a body was flying into hug him. He doesn’t even register it’s Wooyoung until he feels the tears springing from the man’s eyes and running down his back. He hugged Wooyoung back - something he never thought would happen again.

Yes, they were broken. Yes, there was more talking and reconciliation and understanding that needed to happen. But, they were on their way.

Suddenly, more hands and bodies were surrounding him. And, the small hug became a group hug of limbs and sniffles and hope. 

Friendship. They could do that. They could try that.

~~

The days went on and San’s routine morphed into something new - something he never expected. Something he even started to enjoy.

San started opening the plant shop up again.

Mingi and Jongho came to visit, per usual. But, they would normally bring Yunho along, or Seonghwa with lunch.

San and Yunho began to get to know one another, realizing they shared a similar sense of humor and both liked the same video games. Sometimes Mingi and Jongho would just leave the pair to continue to talk as San watered the plants and ran around the shop doing miscellaneous tasks. After work, San would sometimes even invite Yunho upstairs to play a game or two before normally Mingi would come by and drag them both next door for dinner.

“I’m sorry about your parents. That seems like it must’ve been a tough childhood. It’s not fair what your mom did to your dads, but it’s definitely unfair that you were caught in the middle of it all,” Yunho says offhandedly one day, in between rounds of their favorite latest game.

San only hummed, obviously surprised by the random comment. 

“I - well my parents weren’t soulmates. Actually, neither of them were born with soul marks. I remember how difficult it was for them. And, I know it’s a totally different circumstance, but just know that I’m here, if you ever want to talk about it… any of it,” Yunho says. San looks over and sees how serious this normally giggly boy is. 

Although it wasn’t prompted and San didn’t have the words to respond, he was moved by Yunho. No one else had brought up anything that had happened at that first lunch. But, obviously they all now knew about San’s past. 

It’s like Yunho knew San wasn’t ready to talk, but he knew one day he would be. And, now San knew that Yunho would be there.

The silence - that wasn’t quite bad - was broken by Mingi ringing the doorbell to tell them it was time for dinner. Both boys blushingly smiled and trudged downstairs. San may have brushed Yunho’s hand once or twice on the walk over - but neither boy seemed to take issue.

Dinners with the group became a normal occurrence for San. 

At first, he thought he was intruding, but then he realized that Seonghwa was continuously serving his favorite meals. And that’s when San realized that he wasn’t just joining, but rather was the esteemed main guest that the meals were centered around.

San, though, still insisted on helping with the dishes, every night.

That’s where San got to know Yeosang a bit better.

It was consistently Yeosang’s job to do the dishes every evening, but San was insistent on helping, which led to many awkward nights of cleaning and drying dishes in silence.

“I know the others are happy that I’m here, but if it’s uncomfortable for you or Wooyoung, please just let me know and I can stop coming,” San says one night, suffocating in the silence. He’s drying a bowl with his back turned to Yeosang.

He hears a pan crash and turns to see Yeosang staring at him.

“No, don’t go. I-I just don’t really know how to interact with you, yet. You’re basically a stranger that’s now at every family meal,” Yeosang explains. San wants to laugh, but he stays soberly quiet.

“I feel the same way about all of you, except maybe Mingi and Jongho. Why don’t we start from scratch and you tell me a bit more about yourself?” San suggests. But, he sees the second of hesitation pass over Yeosang’s face and San turns around abruptly.

“Unless you want to respect Wooyoung’s silent treatment of me. I kind of just assumed you were going along with it,” San coughed out.

Since that first encounter, with basically a screamfest between Wooyoung and San, the pair had barely spoken any words to each other. After the hug, San thought maybe Wooyoung might communicate with him. But, it’s back to avoiding his gaze and the silent treatment. At least, now, Wooyoung participates in dinner discussions, but just doesn’t speak directly to San.

“Did anyone ever tell you how we met Wooyoung? Or how any of us had met each other?” Yeosang asked and San’s hair stands on end. He just shakes his head, hoping Yeosang sees it and knows to keep talking.

“Well, the others love telling their meet-cute stories, so I’ll leave that to all of them, when you are comfortable enough to ask. But, for me, I was their sixth soulmate. And, by the time we met, I was a shell of myself. I realized that five of my soulmates had met and it had been such a long time since my compass had moved that I kind of just assumed that they had given up trying to find anyone else and were happy enough as five,” Yeosang explains. 

San nods a bit, remembering the long hiatus between the fifth and sixth stars being filled on his arm - not that he ever looked or cared.

“Things at home and school were also rough. I was a bit of an outsider, more quiet and reserved than my fellow classmates. So, it became a cycle - I was bullied because I was quiet so I became more and more quiet. It came to the point where I didn’t speak for weeks at a time. And, no one noticed. I didn’t have any plans for the future and couldn’t even fathom life after graduation,” Yeosang continues. 

He stops here and San hears a sniffle and immediately turns around to see the man hunched over the sink, holding onto the edge like a lifeline. San wants to reach out and comfort the man, but stays back.

“But, then, Seonghwa came by the coffee shop I was working at at the time. And, it was like two magnets - he slowly got me out of my shell, asking me how my day was, coming back consistently to talk with me. By the time we realized we were soulmates, I felt like a person again,” Yeosang explains.  

“I was the one who suggested we track down our last two soulmates. Because I was terrified that they might’ve felt that same crushing loneliness that I did - that they might’ve thought we abandoned them. And, when I walked into Wooyoung’s bookshop that very first day and we realized we were soulmates, I wasn’t far off. Wooyoung - I mean I doubt he ever said anything to you - but he was in bad shape,” Yeosang explained. San gasps, shocked at the revelation.

“I think we both know Wooyoung well enough to know that he is bright and energetic and can fill a room with joy and happiness. But, he also has lots of doubts and loneliness bubbling under that facade. When we shared tattoos, he immediately burst into tears and wouldn’t stop hugging me and crying. It made me realize that we mirrored each other: both having felt that despair and loneliness. He was just much better at hiding it,” Yeosang finishes and he’s finally looking up at San, who’s now in deep thought, trying to retrace every conversation he’s ever had with Wooyoung - looking for the warning signs of depression or loneliness to the point of no return. But, he can’t seem to find them.

“Did I choose not to see his sadness? Or, did he choose not to show it to me because he knew I was uncomfortable with soulmates?” San all but whispers out, holding back a sob in his throat. Suddenly, Yeosang is placing a hand on top of his and San’s eyes finally catch Yeosang’s. They are finally looking at one another, seeing each other. 

“That’s something that the two of you can talk about. One day, hopefully soon. But, I do think I owe you an apology. I think that this whole time, since the truth came out, I’ve been so focused on protecting Wooyoung’s feelings - because I feel so connected with our past experiences - but that has closed me off from thinking about you and your emotions through all of this. To be honest, they aren’t much different than mine or Wooyoung’s and you deserve to be able to share your sadness and work through your pain with us too. I’m just sorry I’ve been too blindsided to be there for you, before now,” Yeosang finishes. And, now, the pair are mirrored with tears streaming down their cheeks. 

San continues to feel a sob in his throat and can’t speak - can’t respond. Instead, he just leans in and holds Yeosang. 

They stay there, hugging and crying, for what feels like hours. Before Wooyoung, of all people, stumbles upon the scene. He seems shocked, taking a step back, but Yeosang clears his throat and slowly pulls away from San.

“Sorry - I - the others were just wondering if everything was okay. So, I came to check on you,” Wooyoung says, staring directly at Yeosang, as if San doesn’t even exist.

“Ahh - yes, Woo. We will be there soon. Thanks for checking in,” Yeosang says, before grabbing San’s hand and pulling him to the sink with him. Wooyoung stiffly nods and turns back, peeking one last time at them confusedly before moving into the living room.

“Let’s both wash and then both dry from now on, okay? And live a little more in the present?” Yeosang says, bumping his hip into San, who immediately smiles.

“Yes, I would like that very much,” San says with a smile and their night continues. This time, there is conversation. And, everything feels lighter, lighter, lighter.

Things between Yeosang and San blossom, and they begin sitting with each other at dinner and talking before meals, as well. San also finds himself coming over to their house more often, not just for mandatory dinners, but also just to hang out and interact with the group.

San doesn’t think he would ever say it out loud, but whenever he hugs Yeosang, he hopes Yeosang can feel what he wishes to say. 

Thanks for finding me, too.

San also begins to hang out with Jongho and Mingi separately. He loved spending time with them together, all in the shop giggling over something silly, but he also loved how their relationship developed separately. 

While lounging at the group’s home, Mingi always found himself drawing or writing - it was in the softness and quietness of those moments that San found himself most comfortable with Mingi. Mingi would invite San to sit beside him and the pair would hang out together, both drawing or writing or reading. Yes, the pair could become the most rowdy and loud and energetic, but they also found peace in the quietest of activities. Those soft afternoons with tea and chilling with Mingi became some of San’s favorites.

“I don’t know if this will make you uncomfortable or not, but I want to share a part of me with you that’s important to me,” Mingi says one day. The pair had been sketching silently, but Mingi had broken the silence and seemed serious.

“Of course, Mingi. If it’s important to you, it’s important to me,” San responds without hesitation.

“I - well - okay - I wanted to give myself a new tattoo - it’s a lyric I’ve been playing with for a while. And, I would love it if you could be there with me, when I get it,” Mingi explains. 

San understands why Mingi thought San might say no, but the boy's hesitation makes him want to share this important moment with Mingi even more. 

“It would be my honor, Mingi,” San says and the shining, beaming, bright smile Mingi gives him makes San need to look away before he does something silly. 

The pair head downstairs and both Hongjoong and Jongho, both of whom are helping different customers, seem surprised to see the pair head to a station. Mingi begins to set up and San watches the intensity and passion that Mingi has. 

No wonder they all work at the tattoo parlor - the soulmark is what brought them all together, but they also have a shared passion of art through tattoos. Each one of them is skilled in something specific - he sees that Hongjoong is very good with color, Yeosang with cartoon characters, Seonghwa with the removals and abstract art, Yunho with realistic renderings. He was beyond excited to see that Mingi’s speciality was text. 

Mingi gives San a quick look, before pulling up his pants to reveal his ankle. And, that’s when San sees it. Mingi’s soulmark - a compass with 8 filled stars, pointing straight at San.

“I - well I wanted to add some lyrics near my soulmark. Is that okay or does it freak you out too much?” Mingi asks. San shakes his head, although his eyes don’t leave the compass and it’s unwavering, steady point.

That is, until Mingi begins to draw write above it. The passion, and dedication, and precision in Mingi’s posture and movement puts San in a trance that he doesn’t even notice what the lyrics are until Mingi is all done and cleaning up.

“Forever, you are my star. That’s a beautiful lyric, Mingi. I’m excited to hear the rest of the song, one day,” San says. 

And, he means it.

If you ask anybody, Jongho was the opposite of a homebody. He constantly wanted to run around and get outside and be active. 

One day, San saw Jongho pacing outside his store and San finally went outside to ask him what was going on.

“Are you okay Jongho? You’ve been pacing outside for like 15 minutes,” San says, broom in hand.

“Oh - hi Sannie. I - oh wow - that’s so embarrassing, I forgot there were glass windows. Well, I’m - I was just - and you can totally say no if you are too busy or not interested, but I was wondering if you - well you mentioned you loved the sea and I wondered if you would take me?” Jongho finally spits out. San is confused for another moment, trying to fully understand what Jongho said, before he immediately puts the broom down and pulls his keys out to lock up, switching the sign to be closed.

“Sure, let’s go,” San responded.

“Wait, right now? But, we don’t have to if you are busy and working,” Jongho says, startled at how abrupt San’s response was.

“Jongho - calm down - I love the sea and I would love to share a trip to the sea with you,” San responds. 

And, so, the pair make their way to the seaside and spend the afternoon, sitting in the sand, watching the waves. The last time San had come was right after he found out they were all soulmates and San is beyond happy to be making new memories.

Their first trip to the sea isn’t their last - the pair begin adventuring all over the place - sometimes just walking through the town, sometimes hiking in the hills nearby, sometimes through the forests to the North, sometimes back to the sea. San finds his happiness in his small adventures with Jongho.

But, he also finds happiness when everyone is together. Whether it’s dinner or playing another random game Seonghwa found on the internet or random dance parties, he finds himself laughing and smiling and enjoying life way more than his old routine budgeted. 

He finds that having friends and spending time with them and being spontaneous can lead to exciting and joyous experiences - memories that will last a lifetime - even after he leaves.

It crosses San’s mind every once in a while - is he getting too attached? But, he tries to allow himself to soak in the joy he feels. Just like Yeosang suggested, San focuses on living a little more in the present.

The group is happiness. They are love. They are laughter - all things that San starts to wonder if he deserves. After growing up and seeing his family so unhappy, San assumed soulmates always meant trouble - always meant messiness and tragedy. But, after spending time with all of the boys, he’s starting to realize that maybe that’s not everyone’s story.

Maybe that’s not his story. 

On the weekends, when San closes the plant shop, he’ll even help Seonghwa with preparing meals, something San’s always loved doing. Especially when it comes to using herbs. San even started gifting Seonghwa fresh herbs after hearing his plans for upcoming meals. He even brought a basil plant to put on their windowsill, since he knows how frequently it was a staple in the household.

As the weeks go on, things between San and Seonghwa seem fine, the pair growing closer every day. But, San still feels guilt churning at the bottom of his stomach. Until, one day, he doesn’t think he can hold it in any longer.

“Will you ever forgive me for almost making you remove our soulmark?” San asks Seonghwa one day when it was just the pair of them in the kitchen, Seonghwa stirring a stew and San cutting up vegetables and herbs.

“There is nothing to forgive. I was never mad at you, just confused and heartbroken that you felt compelled to remove your mark in the first place. I feel that for every person I help,” Seonghwa explains solemnly.

San is silent and shocked.

“I’m still willing to help you remove your soulmark - if you still want to. You told us - on that first lunch - that we deserve all the love in the world. After getting to know you, I believe that you deserve all the love in the world, too. If removing your soulmark will help you find that love and the happiness you are craving and you so rightfully deserve, I promise I will help you do that,” Seonghwa explains softly and suddenly San is crying. He didn’t know he could physically cry this much, but here he was.

And, then, San said something that had been hiding in his heart - something that had been taking root and growing for all the weeks since their initial meeting. The roots stem from Yeosang’s laugh, the touch of Yunho’s hand in his, Jongho’s smile, Mingi’s soft humming, the warmth of when they were all together….

“And, what if maybe that’s not what I want anymore?” San asked. 

He was terrified of the answer, so he closed his eyes and held his breath. Immediately, he felt someone hold his hand and looked up to see Seonghwa by his side, staring at him with deep seriousness.

“You are always welcome here, Sannie. With us, whenever you are ready,” Seonghwa explains, before placing a soft kiss on San’s forehead and turning immediately back to the stew. San nodded, slotting this memory into the back of his mind to come back to soon. 

He wasn’t ready yet, but maybe opening his hearts to his soulmates - to these beautiful and kind men - wasn’t so difficult or so wrong after all. 

Before San could fully organize his thoughts and his feelings, he knew he had to talk to Wooyoung. He had to clear the air - apologize - and figure out a way for them to move past it - or at the very least, co-exist.

So, one weekend morning, San goes downstairs to water the plants, grabs what he needs off the shelf, and then heads next door. It is early enough that he knows most of the boys won’t be up. But, he knows one young man who rises with the sun and he’s hoping his plan will work out as he slips inside the house (with the emergency key they gave him) and quietly climbs up the stairs. 

Just as he planned, the living room is empty except for one young man sitting comfortably in the chair closest to the window, quietly reading a book. The sunshine softly shines on his face and San soaks in his beauty - it’s been a while since he’s been truly able to.

It takes but a moment before Wooyoung looks up and the pair's eyes meet. Wooyoung immediately looks back down at his book, over to the window, and basically anywhere else but San - obviously flustered. 

Wooyoung didn’t exactly live above the tattoo parlor, per say, but he stayed over enough for San to know he would be around this morning. Most nights, after dinner, he would see Wooyoung cuddling with Yeosang or Seonghwa in his pajamas. Sometimes, the others would offer that San stay the night, too, but San was never bold enough to accept. He didn’t know if he fully wanted to. He didn’t know if he should. But, he knew Wooyoung did. 

“Morning, Wooyoung. I thought - well - I was wondering if I could make us some tea and we could chat? Or we could just read silently together? I brought a book, too,” San softly says, holding up one of his favorite plant anthologies. 

He’s read it a million times - Wooyoung and he both know he’s read it a million times - but, he’s hoping it will break the tension.

Being in the same room - they can do. Reading in silence - they can do. Talking through the past few months - maybe?

The silence continues and San thinks maybe it’s all a mistake… maybe he should just go back home… maybe he should just give up entirely. And, then, he hears it.

“Extra sugar, please,” Wooyoung all but whispers. 

As if San can forget Wooyoung’s tea order.

San tries to hide his beaming smile and all but sprints into the kitchen to begin boiling the water. 

In less than five minutes, he’s bringing two mugs over, sitting in the other lounge chair nearest to the window and the basil plant San gifted the home, with his book open to herbal remedies.

He doesn’t dare speak first. He just stares at the page, willing himself to inhale the same words over and over again. He took the first huge step - coming here when he knew only Wooyoung would be awake. Now, he had to move at the speed of Wooyoung’s trust…

“I miss this, Sannie,” Wooyoung says, softly, suddenly. 

“I miss us, Woo,” San responds immediately, without even thinking, “I miss us sitting at the back of the bookstore, reading everything, laughing about nothing. I miss the old grandmas shushing us, but your grandpa not caring and just bringing us more and more tea. I miss the way your eyes lit up every time you told me about your day. And, I even miss you reading and re-reading and re-reading all of those soulmate love stories. I really thought I was doing what would be best for both of us - creating space for you to live happily with your other soulmates and forget about your last soulmate. But, I realize that it also hurt you along the way, and I can never be more sorry.”

Wooyoung reaches out and takes San’s hand. Both boys seem shocked by the movement, but neither moves away.

“Sannie, I’m still upset that you tried to break our bond, but I also now fully understand why you tried to in the first place. It breaks my heart knowing that you couldn’t feel like you could talk to me,” Wooyoung begins and takes a deep breath, “But, I want you to know that I’m here for you, always. For anything. Your mother and your dad and your father were all horrible people. And, your whole childhood is something no one should’ve had to endure - but you are so strong and so brave and so resilient and so, so, so deserving of love - from your soulmates or anyone else in the world. And, maybe I’m too late, but I would be honored to start over and see where things go, if you will have me - if you will have us.”

San is at a loss for words and instead just softly nods. Soon, Wooyoung is scrambling into the same chair as San, hugging and holding the young man and attaching themselves at the hip.

And, that’s how the rest of the soulmates find San and Wooyoung when they wake up: an entanglement of limbs and books and tea and hearts. The pair are giggling and talking like there’s no one else in the world.

For the first time in what feels like forever, things feel right. Things feel settled.

San’s new routine continues on and on and on and the most surprising of all changes to his routine is his now-almost-common visits to the tattoo parlor. 

There are no pranks involved, anymore. No yelling matches. No sarcasm or anger-infused words thrown around. And, certainly no coconut.

Yes, San consistently finds himself now hand-delivering his bouquets of lavender flowers to the tattoo parlor next door. And, no one seems to mind that after his delivery, he normally pulls up a chair and sits with Hongjoong until past closing hours. No one seems to mind, especially Hongjoong.

“Remember when Hongjoong found out Sannie referred to him as our captain? I’ve never seen him blush so hard. We started calling him captain for weeks, but he got so flustered he almost messed up a couple tattoos, so we had to stop,” Jongho says one day, which is the extent of the jokes. This has San laughing and Hongjoong flustered and chasing Jongho for the rest of the evening.

It was moments like that when San found himself at peace - at home. 

“Do you miss our prank war?” San asks Hongjoong one day. Hongjoong’s feet are still up on the front counter. But, he doesn’t seem as intimidating or as annoying as the first time San met him. It also helps that the music is at one of the lowest volumes (Hongjoong tended to turn it down when San entered, nowadays).

“Sometimes - but, it’s nice seeing you smile instead of glare at me,” Hongjoong explains, sifting through some paperwork. They glance at each other for just a moment and both look away.

“I agree,” San whispers, but Hongjoong catches it and smiles.

San watches as the sun moves across the parlor and finally strikes the lavender bouquet on the front desk. It seems to sparkle - the perfect warm shade of purple.

“What made you call me sunshine? That very first day?” San asks out of curiosity.

“From the moment I saw you, I felt drawn to you. It felt natural to call you sunshine. At first, it was because you were the total opposite of ‘sunshine,’ yelling at us upon first conversation. And, then, I kept using the pet name because it seemed to annoy you. And, then, it hit me,” Hongjoong explained, almost naturally.

“Hmm?” San asks, intrigued for him to continue.

“My compass always pointed me towards our next soulmate. For me, it first pointed to Seonghwa, then Jongho, then Yunho, then Mingi, then Yeosang, then Wooyoung. A real compass points North and if you look in the sky, you can see the North Star shining bright. But, I never needed the North Star - me and my compass always just needed the seven of you. And, after we found Wooyoung, I knew that I would someday find my final star - and then you came into our lives, sunshine,” Hongjoong explains. 

San turns to him and sees the man staring straight back at him.

“You are our final star - the brightest sun in the sky - our true and total sunshine,” Hongjoong spells it out naturally.

Immediately, San leans forward and places a kiss on Hongjoong’s lips. It feels natural - it feels right.

“I told Seonghwa that I didn’t want to remove my soulmark anymore - at the time, I wasn’t sure what I really wanted anymore,” San says, leaning back to commit the sharp lines of Hongjoong’s face to memory. 

There may have been others in the parlor - some of his other soulmates - other customers. But, at that moment, it was just Hongjoong and San.

“But, now, I know,” San explains, “I want you. And, Seonghwa, and Yunho, and Mingi, and Jongho, and Yeosang, and Wooyoung. I want all of us to be together. If you’ll have me.”

“Welcome home, Sannie,” Hongjoong replies, taking San’s hand and kissing his knuckles.

Although San was scared of what was to come - of truly accepting what the universe had in store - of accepting his soulmates - he was also tremendously and overwhelmingly happy. 

San’s life was quiet. Until the tattoo shop decided to blare their hard metal music playlist.

It was peaceful. Until the tattoo shop’s owner opened his mouth.

It was calm. Until the tattoo shop turned his whole life upside down.

And, he wouldn’t change it for the world.

+1

Once the last box of San’s clothes is finally up the stairs above the tattoo parlor, everyone slowly finds a seat after a long day of moving. Everyone except Jongho, who immediately jumps up and grabs Yunho’s hand, urging the lanky man to get up, who looks like he could fall asleep any moment.

“Hyung - come onnnn! Somebody, anybody, please!” Jongho exclaims. San is confused and stands up, but Jongho shakes his head at him.

“Nope - not you - well, Sannie, you need to join us. But, I need someone with expertise to complete a very special task,” Jongho explains with a smirk on his face. San turns to the others, who equally shrug in confusion.

Finally, it’s Hongjoong who chooses to take the bait.

“What’s the task, Jjongie?” Hongjoong asks, chugging a water, looking no closer to standing up than the rest of them.

“Fine - if none of you want to help me with my first tattoo, I’ll do it myself,” Jongho exclaims, in faux frustration. Immediately, everyone - including Wooyoung and San who are obviously very unqualified - are clamoring up on their feet and are asking question upon question.

What’s the tattoo going to be? What’s the meaning? Why now?

But, Jongho keeps his eyes on San the whole time. He slowly grins.

“I want a bouquet of 8 daffodils. For new beginnings. To the beginning of our love story and everything beyond it.”