Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The flowers stretch from horizon to horizon, likely continuing onward much further beyond that by Basil’s reckoning. Perhaps it was infinite, in his few times here he’s never seen an end to it. He walks through the fields, examining and watering every flower and other plants he finds, knowing each type by heart; roses, lilies, tulips, every flower under the sun seems to be here. It all seems perfect but, where is everyone? Normally Kel would be running around asking about every flower he sees, Sunny would be listening to his talks intently even if he already had been told the information a dozen times before, Aubrey would ask to pick some of the prettiest pink flowers she saw, and Mari and Hero would be watching over them all to make sure nobody ran off alone. But now, it seems he’s entirely alone in this endless field.

Although concerning, he doesn’t particularly mind- maybe some alone time would be good for him. More time to focus on tending to the flowers, he reasons. He can’t tell how much time passes as he works alone, watering and trimming all sorts of plants, but at some point something stops him.

“Basil…” a voice, barely audible, speaks from nearby. He looks up and looks around, but doesn’t see anyone.

“Basil…” the voice repeats.

“H-hello?” The voice is familiar, but he has trouble placing it. He moves in the direction of the voice, towards a large patch of lily of the valley. There’s someone there, laying among the lilies, their face unseen behind a mess of long black hair- but Basil knows who it is immediately.

“Mari?” He squats down by her and looks closely, she doesn’t seem injured in any way. “What are you doing here? Are you okay?”

Mari seems to struggle to rise, “I’m fine, just had a bad fall.” But he notices a few flecks of blood on the white flowers as he helps her up, and sees a couple bruises on her arms and legs. She puts an arm around his shoulder and leans on him a bit, “My knee is acting up, I hope you don’t mind helping me around a bit.”

“Not at all, always happy to help a friend.” He smiles and keeps walking through the endless field, Mari pitching in to help with all the flowers however she can. While he’s dealing with some weeds, Basil notices that she has a nosebleed. “You sure you’re okay?”

“I’m fine.” She smiles reassuringly, but for some reason he feels unnerved by it.

“By the way,” he says after a moment. “Where is everyone else? I’ve looked everywhere but I’ve only found you.”

“I don’t think they want to talk to you.” She seems a bit sad at that idea, and Basil notices her skin seems to have suddenly gotten a lot more pale.

“Why?” His heart begins to race and he feels his legs shaking, as though he already knows what she’s going to say.

“Because of your lies, and your cowardice. You betrayed them all, and you think they’d still want to talk to you?”

He looks away from her as they keep walking, he doesn’t want to see what she looks like. He tries to say something but he can’t think of a response- he knows she’s right.

“They all loved you, but you hurt them with your delusions. Perhaps it was inevitable, you’ve always been the delusional sort.” There’s no anger coming from her voice, only sadness and disappointment, which hurt more than any amount of vitriol.

“I-I’m so sorry, I know what I did was terrible but I was just-”

“Trying to protect Sunny? I know.” She lets out a thin, raspy sigh, like the last exhalation of the dead. “I just want to know why.”

Basil freezes, he feels sweat running down his face, and his body trembling as he looks at anything other than Mari. “Why what?”

“Why didn’t you help me? I might have lived if you just called an ambulance, but you never even tried.” He puts her cold hand on his cheek and forces him to look her way- her eyes are cold and dead now, all the joy and love that inhabited them now gone. Her neck was almost entirely covered with a bruise, one that could have only come from a noose.

Basil jumps back, letting her stumble and fall, and suddenly they’re in her house. She lays in a crumpled pile at the bottom of the stairs, while an indistinct figure looks on in horror from above. He can only stare down as her limp form, within touching distance of him, as the other boy rushes down the stairs. Then she grabs his legs, looking up at him through a tangled mess of hair.

“Why… didn’t you help me?” Tears roll down her barely visible face, she sounds scared and confused more than anything. “Did you hate me? Did I do something wrong?”

“N-No! Mari I-I never-” her grip on his ankle causes him to trip as he tries to back away, she lets go and allows him to fall onto his back. He looks down to see her but all he sees is his garden shears stabbing him in the stomach, his shirt staining dark with blood. He wants to scream in pain but can’t, so he simply lets his head fall and closes his eyes, ready to embrace the end he deserves.

He awakens in a cold sweat, enveloped by an all-consuming darkness. He puts his hand to his stomach, no wounds, no blood. Of course there would be no blood, he thought, it was just a bad dream. He wipes his face, he can’t tell if it’s sweat or tears that’s wetting his cheeks. Sitting up, he looks around his bedroom cautiously, as though there might be someone, or something, watching from the darkness. He looks at the clock- 3AM, only 4 hours of sleep so far. His mouth feels dry, maybe a glass of water will help. He slowly slides out of his warm bed and walks towards his bedroom door. As he looks at his old carpet, memories of his fight with Sunny replay in his mind over and over, no matter how much he tries to not think of it.

“Everything is going to be okay.” He closes his eyes and begins repeating this mantra as he leaves the bedroom and enters the hallway. The house is dead silent, which only emphasized how alone he was currently- maybe this is how Sunny felt, while his mom was away preparing their new home?

“Everything is going to be okay.” But he knows it’s a lie- he lies to almost everyone these days, especially himself. He lied about Mari’s death, he lied about the photo album, and he lies every day he tells people he’s okay. The only person he feels he’s ever been totally honest with is Sunny but, is that really true? Was he lying when he said he could handle himself on his own? If he was, he must have been lying to himself as well, because even he believed it at the time. How stupid he feels now, barely able to traverse his house at night without feeling terror.

“Why didn’t you help me?” The words from his dream echo in his mind as he inches forward. Why didn’t he? He loved Mari, she was more family to him than his own parents, why did he do nothing when she fell? He’s sure any of the others would have called an ambulance immediately, but he just stood there staring. Was she still alive then? He can’t remember, he just knows she was gone by the time they rested her in her bed.

She was gone… even four years later, the idea was sometimes hard to accept in his mind. Mari, beloved Mari, how could the universe be so cruel to take such a loving soul so soon? She had her whole life ahead of her, and in an instant it was all taken away. It was a pointless accident over a violin, she was just standing in the wrong place. How could that be allowed to happen? She was… so still, so silent, curled up on the floor in front of him like she was only asleep. He wanted to shout, scream for her to get up, but he just stood there staring at her in silent terror, until Sunny came down and began dragging her up the stairs- then, he started helping him. When they got her into bed, Sunny was desperately looking for a pulse, but Basil already knew she was dead. Her eyes, once full of joy and compassion, were empty; her skin, so vibrant and warm, was now pale and cold; her heart, once overflowing with love for all her friends, had stopped forever. He almost threw up then - he might have done so after hanging the body, but he can’t remember much of that day after she fell - and even now the thoughts make him sick to his stomach.

“Everything is going to be okay.” He enters the kitchen and reaches for a cup with a trembling hand, filling it with water from the tap and taking a large gulp. It quenches his thirst but does nothing to cool his anxiety, because he knows he’s more alone than he’s ever been in his entire life. No Mari, no Sunny, no grandmother, not even Polly was around to help, it was just him alone in this-

He freezes suddenly, a chill runs down his spine.

No… no he’s not alone.

There’s Something behind him. He doesn’t need to see it to know it’s there. How long has it been following without him realizing? Perhaps since he got out of bed. He thought that it would be gone when the truth had been revealed, as Sunny seemed to be free of its curse; of course, he was wrong. Even before Mari died Something had followed him whenever he was walking alone, especially when it was dark.

“Everything is going to be okay.” He repeats, it feels more and more hollow each time he says it. He remembers once this mantra was comforting, now he only says it because he doesn’t know what else to say when he’s stressed.

“You’re all alone now,” Something said, but it didn’t say anything, because it wasn’t really there. Basil tells himself this, but no matter how much he reminds himself, it never makes the voice feel less real. “And that is what you deserve.”

He tries to ignore it, it always says the same things, it never replies when he argues.

“Did you ever really-” The words are cut off by a loud ringing that causes Basil to jump in surprise. It was the phone, who would be calling at this hour? It’s practically right next to him, on the wall by the oven, so he picks it up immediately after the shock wears off. “H-Hello?”

“H-Hi.” A familiar voice responds on the other end.

“Sunny? W-What are you doing calling at this hour?” Basil can’t hide his confusion. It’s been a month since they last saw each other, and suddenly Sunny just calls out of nowhere in the middle of the night?

“Sorry… I couldn’t sleep. I hope I didn’t wake you.”

“It’s fine, I couldn’t sleep either. I just… wasn’t expecting to hear from you so soon, to be honest.” If he was honest, part of him hadn’t expected to hear from him at all, despite all the promises they made- the thought made him disgusted with himself, not being able to even trust his best friend would be there for him, but he could never shake the fear until now. “Is everything okay?”

“Just having trouble adjusting. Getting used to a new house is… difficult.”

Basil sits on the floor with his back against the wall, so Something can’t stalk behind him. “I can imagine.”

“Hey, do you remember when I would tell you about my dreams?”

“Of course, I remember you always had really detailed dreams.” Detailed barely described it, Basil remembers it seeming like he had created entire worlds in his dreams and explored them all as though they were real places. “Do you still have those dreams?”

“Yeah.” He falls quiet for a moment, probably thinking of his next words carefully. “After Mari died, I spent most days hiding in those dreams, in fact. Making adventures to go on with my friends, like nothing bad ever happened.”

“What were they like?”

“Well let’s see…” He then starts going into everything, four years of adventures all in his dreams. How he, Kel, Hero, and Aubrey constantly searched the land to find Basil after he would go missing, with Mari always there with a picnic ready whenever they needed a rest. He traveled to so many places, from a castle to space to the bottom of the ocean, and fought all manner of characters from stories they grew up on, all in an effort to find Basil. Everyone was always so worried about Basil, especially Aubrey, who he recounts being on the verge of tears many times when they couldn’t find him. So much focused on the antics of him and their friends, all the bickering between Kel and Aubrey, and how Hero always had to mediate between them. Hero seemed to be a great focus in a lot of their adventures, like when Sweetheart tried to marry him.

“Wait, so the casino was run by a talking shark in a suit?” He giggles at that thought, wondering why Sunny would connect those two characters together in his stories.

“Yeah, he tried to keep Hero working for him because he was the perfect employee, but we beat him and he had to call Pluto in for help.”

“Man, you’ve really made some great stories, and you did it all in your sleep.” He can hear Sunny muffle a small laugh.

“I haven’t even told you about Humphrey the Whale.”

Basil yawns, “Can always save some stuff for another time, but tell me. Did you ever find me?”

“Yes but…” His voice trails off a bit, “Whenever I did, everything would just reset to how things were in the beginning, and you’d go missing all over again.”

“I see.” Basil nods even though Sunny can’t see him. “I guess you didn’t want the adventure to end.”

“Yeah…” Sunny seems a bit pensive about it, or maybe he’s just tired. “How about we continue this another day.”

“Sure. Maybe some time this weekend?”

“Sounds good, let me give you my phone number.” Basil quickly grabs a scrap of paper and a pencil from one of the drawers in the kitchen, which seems to be home of all manner of miscellaneous items, and writes down the number.

“I’ll see- or uh, talk to you then.”

“Heh, good night.”

“Good night.” He hangs up the phone. The house seems less intimidating now, perhaps because his eyes have had more time to adjust to the darkness, so he has a much easier time navigating to his room. He can’t feel Something behind him, which also puts him at ease- though he’s sure it’s only backed away a little bit rather than left entirely. It’s always there, after all, even if he doesn’t feel it breathing down his neck.

He checks the clock in his room- 4:35 AM. An hour and a half? They really spent that long just talking? He crawls into bed, adjusts the pillows and blanket, and curls up in a preferred posture. All the while, his mind wanders through all the information he was told of Sunny’s dreams, trying to visualize all he had been told. Sunny went by the name “Omori” in his dream world; everyone else had purple hair, except Basil whose hair was a shade of green; every day they just sat around and had a picnic in a playground, until inevitably Basil would vanish and they’d have to find him. He wonders why it was always him who went missing- perhaps it had something to do with his knowledge of Mari’s death? Perhaps it’s how Sunny’s mind expressed regret over leaving him alone? With all these thoughts swirling in his head, he slowly drifts off to sleep where, mercifully, he dreams not of Mari, but instead of Hero marrying Sweetheart.

Chapter Text

When Basil wakes up again, it’s not his dreams that force him awake, but rather the noise of reality forcing him awake. He listens, and realizes that someone is opening the front door. He looks at the clock- 10:57 AM. Odd, Polly is usually around a lot earlier, but maybe she was held up by something. He settles back into bed, wanting to enjoy the comfort of his blankets for a little longer, not like he has anything to do today after all; it’s summer vacation, and he doesn’t have any friends to spend it with, so he’ll probably be alone all day. He wonders what he can do in that day, perhaps he can start a new book, tend to his plants more, or maybe-

He hears talking outside, two voices, neither of them being Polly.

“I wonder where he is?” A woman’s voice says.

“Probably still in bed.” A man replies tersely.

No . Basil knows exactly who they are, and they’re the last people he wants around right now. No no no. He slowly climbs out of bed and creeps to the door- just then there’s a loud knock on it from the other side.

“Basil! Are you there?”

He opens the door slowly, and finds himself face-to-face with his mother. She’s just as he remembers her last time he saw her, almost two years ago. He locks eyes with her for a moment, the same bright blue as his own eyes, before she suddenly pulls him into an awkward, tight embrace.

“Oh, it’s been too long!”

“M-Mom?” Is all he can manage to say. What is there to say? He certainly didn’t miss her, that would require her to be around at all. Nor is he happy to see her, for that would require him to have any affection for her.

Well, there is one thing he can think to say.

“W-Why are you here?”

The question takes her by surprise, and she breaks the uncomfortable hug to give him her own look of confusion.

“Why are we here? Why wouldn’t we be? We came as fast as we could when we heard the news.”

The news… The news… She can only mean news of his grandmother- her mother- passing away. But that was a month ago, and he was in the hospital for a week afterwards- why didn’t they come then?

“But, it’s been a month…”

“Work held us up.” His father watches the two from further back with his typical look of indifference. “I had a lot to do.”

“Yeah, I’m sure you understand how important his work is.” His mom smiles and pats him on the head, which might have been endearing as a kid but now feels awkward when the two are the same height.

“I understand.” He lies, as usual, and emphasizes it with a fake smile. It’s hard for him to keep his composure at that moment, faking a smile means they can’t see how angry he really is. ‘I’m sure you understand,’ not even the smallest of apologies? His grandmother died and he was hospitalized for almost a week and they weren’t there at all, and all they can say now is ‘I’m sure you understand’?

“I know you just woke up but do you think you could help us bring our luggage in?” His mom asks, but he can tell she’s not actually asking.

“Y-Yeah, just give me a minute.”

She smiles and leaves to deal with the luggage, leaving Basil alone with his father. His dark hair has developed a few streaks of grey, but beyond that he seems unchanged since the two last saw each other- he might even be wearing the same clothes, a white button up shirt and black pants, but it’s hard to tell for certain.

“Basil.” He says in his usual calm, but authoritative voice. “Have your grades improved at all lately?”

His stomach turns- no, his grades haven’t gotten better, in fact they might be even worse than when his parents last visited. Ever since Mari passed, studying and doing homework have often felt like Herculean tasks for him, especially after one of his breakdowns. He used to be smart, he used to be well-read, but it seems like all that left him a long time ago.

“A little…” He tries to lie but knows that this is something he can’t get away with lying about.

“A little? ” He sighs, “You went from an A student to barely passing your classes, you really need to take your grades more seriously.”

“M-May I at least wash up before we get into this?”

His father makes a grunt and nods to the bathroom. “Make it quick.”

Ruthless, absolutely without compassion, all he cares about is results. That’s how it’s been with him for as long as Basil remembers. He never asks how his son is doing, or what he’s been up to, or whether he’s made any new friends, he only cares about grades and test scores. And he accepts no excuse for failure, either.

Basil nods back and rushes into the bathroom- he wasn’t lying about needing to wash up, he absolutely does, but he also wanted to use this as a chance to steady his mind a little before having to deal with his parents for the rest of the day. As he washes his face, he realizes now that his hands are shaking.

He takes a deep breath, “You can do this, you’ve survived worse.” And he has, without question, yet somehow the idea of facing his parents feels more viscerally terrifying than almost drowning. Perhaps he knows, unlike that day at the lake, that there’s nobody who can save him from this- no way that anyone could ever save him from this. All he can do is try to weather this storm himself. After brushing his teeth and combing his hair, he looks into the mirror to make sure his stress doesn’t show on his face. He looks down at his hands, and his wrists- the old scars itch a little.

He sighs, “I can do this.” Another lie? He’s not sure, and that scares him even more.

A few hours pass, getting luggage in and getting settled- usually his parents don’t stay in this house when they visit, but since a room has been opened up now they decided it’d be best to stay here instead of a nearby hotel. Even so, the only open bed isn’t exactly large enough for two adults, so his father decides that he’ll sleep on the couch.

Basil checks the time, 1:30 PM, lunch time and he never even had breakfast. He steps into the kitchen to make a sandwich, trying to ignore his mom watching tv in the living room as he does so. It’s hard to ignore his parents’ presence, however, especially when they feel the need to comment on everything he does.

“Why are you doing it like that?” His mom asks. He looks down, he’s spreading peanut butter onto bread with a fork.

“Oh, uh, no reason really. Hehe” He lies, because he’s too embarrassed to admit that even holding a butter knife makes him uncomfortable sometimes.

She smiles. “Why don’t you come over here and eat? There’s still a lot we need to catch up on.” He wants to say no, he wants to eat alone in his room, but he nods in agreement anyways. A game show of some kind is on tv, Basil doesn’t care enough to figure out which it might be, he’s too busy gazing down at the sandwich as though he could eat by just looking at it long enough.

“So how are all your friends?” His mother asks suddenly. It’s the last thing he wants to talk about right now, the reason he didn’t want to sit in here at all. He knew the question would be asked eventually, of course, but he wanted to delay that moment for as long as possible.

“T-they’re fine.” He lies, “My friend Sunny moved out last month but… w-we still keep in touch. And Hero is going to college now.”

“Oh that’s nice. And what about that nice girl Aubrey? You always seemed so fond of her, heh.”

He sighs, of course, she still can’t imagine Basil hanging out with a girl unless he’s attracted to her. “We… We talk occasionally, but a lot has changed since we were kids, and she’s got a new friend group.” He finally starts eating at that point, although he does not feel all that hungry suddenly.

“That’s a shame. Have you been taking any more photos lately?” Basil is annoyed that she doesn’t seem to ask about Kel at all, but then she probably hasn’t bothered to know any of his friends’ names.

“No.” He says reflexively, not wanting to show his photo album to her.

“Too bad, I always loved seeing the photos you took as a kid. Have you ever thought about becoming a photographer?”

“I-I could consider it, I guess.” If he were honest, he would say he hasn’t thought about a potential career in years. In fact, for a long time he had not even been able to imagine living that long. “What have you been up to lately, mom?” He doesn’t actually care, but he wants to deflect the conversation towards her so it doesn’t feel so much like an interrogation.

“Oh you wouldn’t believe the stuff that’s happened these past few years!” With that she is off talking aimlessly about this drama or that work incident or any other strange happenings that crosses her mind. Basil barely pays any attention, most of it is utter nonsense to him anyways, just work culture and adult gossip. She doesn’t notice his inattentiveness, however, and keeps going on and on. How could anyone care? Why can’t he just be left in peace to eat his peanut butter and jelly sandwich? It hasn’t even been a day and he already wishes he was alone again, at least Something has the courtesy to only harass him at night.

Once he’s finished his food he stands up awkwardly, “Can I be excused?” It’s probably a dumb question, but he feels compelled to ask first anyways.

“Oh, you don’t need to ask.”

With that he gets up and leaves for his bedroom, not giving her a chance to say anything more. His father is there in the hallway, however, likely having been organizing his grandmother’s old room a little.

“Basil.”

He freezes in place and his chest tightens as he reluctantly locks eyes with his father. “Y-Yes?”

“How did you end up in the hospital? It seemed pretty serious when Polly told me about it.”

“It was just a small head injury, no need to worry.”

His dad is silent for a moment, his expression is hard for Basil to read. “And, uh, this ‘small head injury’ required an ambulance?” He raises an eyebrow, perhaps the only thing worse than if he outright accused Basil of lying- he must know it’s a lie, but he wants to see where it goes.

Basil swallows, why did he think he could get away with this? He can just come clean but he can’t now. “I-I was knocked out and I guess Polly just panicked a little.” Immediately he regrets saying that about Polly, she doesn’t deserve to be thrown under the bus for his mistakes.

“I see.” His tone sounds skeptical. “In any case, I’m glad you seem to be fully recovered.”

“Polly helped a lot.” Basil adds in, hoping to make up for his last comment, “She’s done a great job.”

“Good.” He pulls out a piece of paper and hands it to Basil- it’s a shopping list. “By the way, I need you to pick up a few things at the grocery store. We’re going to be staying a while and the fridge seems a bit empty currently.”

He nods, Polly had actually been planning to go grocery shopping soon, but seemingly even she was taken by surprise when his parents showed up. “Alright.”

Chapter Text

It’s bright out, so bright that even the cheap sunglasses Basil took with him aren’t enough, and he squints and puts a hand over his forehead as he adjusts to the daylight. What he sees is the same sight he’s always seen when he steps out of his house; the same suburban street with the same houses on the other side. The world goes on as usual, entirely oblivious to what’s been unfolding in this unassuming house. He takes a deep breath and sighs before setting off for Othermart. He’s not used to being the one to go to the store, but he’s old enough that learning to do so would be useful. He can’t rely on Polly forever, after all, she’ll probably leave once he’s old enough to live on his own.

She’ll leave, just like everyone else.

“That is what you deserve…”

He looks around- were those his own thoughts, or did Something else just say them out loud?

As he crosses the street he looks to his left, down the row of similar suburban homes. He can barely see the basketball hoop outside Hero and Kel’s home, and beyond that Sunny’s old home. Someone is already moving in, the trucks are parked outside and likely being unloaded. Are the new residents aware of the death that happened in that very house only a few years ago? Surely not, no reasonable person would buy a house where a teenage girl was found hanged in the backyard.

He keeps going, he doesn’t want to linger too long on that thought.

The park is abuzz with activity, the early afternoon often is the main time people go. A walk through the woods would be nice, but that can wait for another time. As he walks past he spots Kel playing a game of basketball with some people he doesn’t recognize- friends from school maybe? Basil doesn’t really know many people in school, it’s better for everyone that way. The Hooligans are also at the park, around the bench that was too close to the sidewalk for his comfort. Kim glances up and sees him as he walks by, he looks away and walks faster.

He stops outside of Hobbeez and looks inside- when was the last time he went inside? Games, movies, books, comics, he had lost interest in most of them after Mari’s death- he didn’t have the courage to walk there on his own, and after his grandmother fell ill he stopped getting anything for his birthday or Christmas. Perhaps, however, it’s time for him to consider getting back into his old passions. He shakes his head- not now, he was only given enough money for groceries anyways. Maybe a summer job would be in order, too.

As he enters Othermart he glances down at his list again, it shouldn’t be too hard. Shouldn’t, but he has a way to make simple tasks feel impossible. He takes a cart and begins searching the aisles, most of it is easy but his parents seem oddly picky about certain brands. He doesn’t recognize many of the names, though he hasn’t paid too much attention to specific brands in a while.

Hours pass, or what feels like hours.

This is more overwhelming than he anticipated.

The grocery store isn’t very large, so why can’t he seem to find everything he needs? He could always substitute a few of the more specific requests with items that appear similar, but they might be angry about it. Was the specificity born just of personal taste? Dietary restrictions? Allergies? He doesn’t even know his parents well enough to understand their eating habits. He could always ask an employee, but that would mean admitting that he’s been wandering aimlessly through the aisles for who knows how long.

Suddenly, he sees something at the other end of an aisle. Someone achingly familiar stands there, her face obscured by long dark hair. She waves and turns the corner out of view. Basil follows, although he isn’t sure why.

As he turns the corner, he suddenly crashes into someone and is sent sprawling onto the floor, his basket of groceries scattered around him.

“Oh I’m so sorry. Are you okay?” A familiar voice says as Basil sits up and rubs his head. He looks up and the two lock eyes- it’s Hero, standing by a shopping cart of groceries. A look of recognition crosses his face as he realizes who he ran into.

“I-I’m fine. Sorry about that.” He gets to his knees and starts picking up all the food he dropped- thankfully nothing shattered.

Hero drops to his knees and starts putting things into the basket, “I can help…”

Basil feels his stomach tighten, “No need to trouble yourself!”

Hero snatches up the shopping list off the ground and takes a look at it, Basil cringes as he watches. “Who gave you this list?”

“M-My parents are visiting and, uh, they gave it to me…”

Hero nods sagely, “That explains it.” He points to a few of the things written down. “I don’t think you can find this kind of stuff in a supermarket.”

“Believe me, I tried.” Basil tries to be humorous, but he just sounds defeated. He stands up and wipes himself off, still feeling sore from the fall and dreading having to walk back home with that pain.

“If you don’t mind me asking…” He speaks a bit reluctantly, “How are you handling your grandmother’s passing?”

He tenses up, why does Hero care about how he’s doing? “Uh-uh, I’m fine? I-It’s not easy but I can manage.”

“... I, uh, I know how you feel.” Hero says after a moment. “It’s rough but… you’ve got people to support you at least.”

Basil’s heart races- is he talking about Mari’s death? He has to be, what else could he be talking about? He’s making sure Basil always remembers what he’s done, clearly. He must hate even being so close, but is helping only out of common decency. That’s just who Hero is, he’ll help even the people he hates if they need it.

But he won’t let them forget. He won’t let Basil forget.

Basil’s breathing is a bit unsteady. “T-Thanks for the help, but-but uh…” he takes the list. “I-I really should be going now.”

“Yeah, you probably should be heading home now.”

He nods and turns to leave as fast as he can, nearly forgetting to stop and buy the stuff he had just spent ages browsing the store for. After one awkward interaction with the cashier, where she likely can see his stress and discomfort, he grabs the bags of groceries and heads out. He’s not surprised by Hero’s words- he is surprised by how much it actually hurts to hear him say it. Hero, Kel, and Aubrey would likely never forgive him, why can’t he just accept that?

Because he still loves them, of course. They’re good people, and they have every right to be angry at him for the crimes he’s done. But… Why did they let him go free like this? Shouldn’t they have reported him to the authorities for his actions? Perhaps living with their scorn is a greater punishment than any amount of prison.

He stops outside the store and takes a few deep breaths to steady himself. He’s shaking hard and his heart rate has skyrocketed. Perhaps some water would help him shake off this feeling.

He heads home as fast as he can, hoping to not linger long enough for Hero to run into him again outside. It’s well into the afternoon now, perhaps around 3PM, and the sun is still high in the sky. Why did Hero even bother asking about his grandmother? Maybe he felt obligated to say something to Basil at that moment. He doesn’t really care about his feelings, surely. Why would he? His grandmother was bound to pass away soon, he honestly had felt a twinge of relief when it finally happened; after months of anxiety and fear over the day, it had finally come to pass, and all the uncertainty was washed away and replaced with a grim resignation. He was sure he would die that day, so it hadn’t bothered him as much as it should have, but now…

“Hey flower creep!” He stops at the intersection beside his house and looks back to see Angel approaching behind him, probably heading home from the park.

“Uh, y-yeah?”

Angel smirks, trying his best to look confident and self-assured. “Lost in your thoughts? You barely even realized I was behind you til I said something.”

Basil swallows, he’s usually more attentive of whether there’s someone, or something, behind him. “Why does it matter to you?”

“Heh, was just debating if I should trip you or not.” He crosses his arms. “I heard you plucked Sunny’s eye out.”

“Who told you that?” Basil starts shaking again.

“Just a hunch we’ve had, Aubrey won’t tell us anything but Kim says it’s true.”

“And… what would Kim know of this?”

“Says Aubrey told her all about it, but even she won’t say anything more than that.”

So, Kim knows the truth? The fact she hasn’t divulged it to all her friends is a good sign, at least, but the fact alone that she knows unsettles Basil. She’s always been the most vitriolic towards him, sometimes even more so than Aubrey, what might she do now that she knows his secret?

“I don’t get why Aubrey’s suddenly gone soft on you.” Angel suddenly breaks his thoughts. The younger boy walks past him and turns to go down their street. “Were it up to me, you wouldn’t be able to leave the house without getting some of this .” He holds up a fist, trying to look intimidating, but the fact he’s just a kid ruins the effect. He walks away, leaving Basil alone again.

Aubrey has avoided him for a while now, he wasn’t sure why she didn’t go back to harassing him now that she knows the depths of his evil- perhaps she was afraid? He did almost kill Sunny, perhaps she’s afraid he’ll do that again if he’s pushed too hard.

He rushes inside and quickly sets down all the groceries on the dining table.

“Oh, there you are.” His mother says, “Was wondering what was taking you so long.”

He doesn’t respond, instead he rushes directly into his room and locks the door behind him. He sits down with his back against the door, taking long deep breaths. He wishes he could hide here, just like Sunny hid in his room for so many years, outside he feels like everyone is judging him; he’s felt that way for so long after Mari died, but now he knows for certain that they are, because now they know the truth. The uncertainty is gone, but the certainty of their hatred is even more draining to him.

“Liar.” Says a voice.

He looks around, the voice is familiar but at the same time alien. Was that Something speaking, or his own voice?

He wishes Polly were here, she’d listen, but with his parents around it seems unlikely she’ll be around the house very often. Besides, she works for his father, if he asks her to tell him everything Basil has told her, she’d have no choice but to comply.

Which means…

A sudden shock of realization jolts him upright. He looks around the room as though he’s trying to find some escape, but the only way out is behind him, and through his parents.

Which means she’ll tell them what happened that night.

She’ll tell them the truth.

Then it’ll all be over for him, they’ll know who he really is deep down. He takes a deep breath and tries to steady himself. It’s not as bad as he thinks, surely. It can’t be. It can't be. Everything’s going to be okay. Everything’s going to be okay. Everything is going to be okay.

“Liar.” The same voice as before. The voice of a Stranger, yet also somehow familiar.

“Same time tomorrow?” Kim asks as she collects the candy wrappers she and Vance have been building up all day and dumps them into the trash can. It sometimes concerns Aubrey just how much candy the two of them can eat in a single day, it certainly can’t be good for their teeth.

“We’ll see.” Aubrey says. “Hero said something about getting lunch that day, but he’s been kinda busy doing chores for his parents these past few days.”

Kim rolls her eyes, “Man, Hero’s so boring , I feel like I’m hanging out with your bland older brother whenever I’m around him.”

Aubrey lets out a small chuckle but says nothing, she doesn’t want to admit that Hero really is like an older brother to her. The two have changed a lot these past four years apart, mostly for the worse it often feels, and he clearly wanted to make up for that lost time any way he can. He also clearly still feels guilty about not being there for her in the aftermath of Mari’s death, and hopes being there for her now might help him atone- as though he needs to atone for anything. If anyone needs to atone for anything, it’s her.

“I was gonna ask if you wanted to join us, but I’m guessing that’s a ‘no’.”

“Guess we always have another day.” Kim looks over and sees Vance waiting impatiently by the park entrance. “I better get going.”

“Alright.” Aubrey leans forward and gives Kim a quick kiss. “See ya.”

“See ya.” She turns and joins her brother, something is said between them before they proceed to head home.

Aubrey looks back at the bench- everyone else has already left, leaving her by herself in the park now. It’s still light out, but everyone seems to have had a reason to head home early today. It happens sometimes, no big deal, but it always leaves her feeling a little unsure of what to do for the rest of the day. Maybe she’ll just watch a little tv in her room back home for a while, one of the others might stop by later when they’re free- that’s usually how it goes at least. She leaves the park and waits at the crossing as a few cars pass, but stops before stepping into the road when she sees Hero coming from the direction of Othermart, arms laden with groceries. He could probably use a little help.

“Hey Hero!” She calls as she approaches. “Need a hand?”

“That’d be great, thanks.” He hands off a bag with a large carton of milk.

“It’s nothing.” As the two cross the street, Aubrey can’t help but notice a look of concern on Hero’s face. “Something up?”

“I…” He hesitates for a moment, perhaps trying to find the right words. “I ran into Basil at the store earlier.”

“Oh yeah, Kim said she saw him walking to the store a few hours ago. I thought it was strange, because usually Polly would get groceries for him, and he never visits Hobbeez or Gino’s.”

“He said something about his parents sending him, might be why he was so… tense.”

She raises an eyebrow, “More tense than usual?”

“Yeah.” Hero nods. The idea seems crazy to Aubrey, Basil is already so tense whenever he’s just minding his own business, it’s hard to imagine him being more agitated than usual. “It felt like he was afraid of me, honestly. He was visibly shaken and ran away as soon as the conversation ended.”

“Not too surprising, honestly.” She sighs, “I’m still not really sure how to feel about him, honestly.”

“… Me neither. He’s always been so kind and considerate, it’s hard to wrap my head around what he did…”

“Hey…” Aubrey stops at the turn onto Hero’s street. “Do you… think he was faking it the whole time?”

He shakes his head, “Aubrey, you knew him longer than any of us, do you think he faked it?”

“I… no.” The idea seems absurd to her, how could he have kept up such a massive lie at such a young age for so long? And how would he have benefited from it? Still, it’s hard to reconcile his quiet generosity and kindness with the fact he was willing to lie about Mari’s death for so long. There had to be something that compelled him to act in such a way, but what could be so powerful that it would drive him to ruin everything he had? Perhaps…

“Come on, let’s not linger on this right now.” Hero turns back and keeps walking.

Aubrey follows, but she can’t help but linger on it. Basil always seemed like an uncomplicated person to her, even when she hated him for what happened to the photo album, but the truth has revealed him to be a total enigma. His actions were, and often still are, erratic and irrational- he’s afraid of being alone yet he drove all his friends away from him, he protected Sunny for years yet he also stabbed him in the eye. It all leaves her wondering: just who is Basil?

Chapter Text

Time passes, as it always does, and Basil stays in his room for the rest of the afternoon. He tries to take a nap, but his mind and heart both refuse to calm down enough to let him doze off. He tries to read, but he can’t focus on the words. So instead, he just sits on his bed staring at his photo album in his lap; Sunny had practically forced him to keep it when they last saw each other, and he put a lot of symbolic value in Basil keeping it, but Basil himself was very unsure of it. For so long, he’s hoped that someday he could get back these happy times, but it’s clear now to him that such a hope is impossible.

He flips through it, he hasn’t done that since Sunny brought it back incomplete, but he’s glad to see that all of the photos were returned to their places. He thought about putting the recent photos of him and Sunny in, too, but he hadn’t had the courage to open the photo album until now.

One however seems extremely faded compared to the others, like it’s been out in the elements for years. Strange, he lost this one ages ago, some time around when Mari died it simply vanished. Perhaps Sunny had found it and put it back in place, but where would he have found it? He gently pulls the photo off and looks at the back.

‘Don’t forget it’s in the toy box’

He’s not sure what’s more off putting to him- the text on the back, or the fact that part of him knew it was there before even seeing it. He knows exactly what had been put in the toy box, but who left a note reminding Sunny of it? He puts it back, he doesn’t want to think about it. Moving on, he flips to the end- more of the album was empty than not, and there were still many pages just waiting to be filled with new memories. Despite his promise to Sunny, Basil hasn’t added any of his new photos yet. He will, eventually, now just isn’t the right time.

“BASIL! DINNER’S READY!” His mom yells. He glances at the clock, almost 6PM already? Where did the hours go? He gets up, promising that he’ll definitely add his photos to the photo album later, and reluctantly slinks out of his room- he doesn’t feel well, but he knows he still needs to eat. “There you are.” His mom says as she sets out plates on the dinner table, “You were in your room for a while, what were you doing?”

“Reading.” He lies. “A book about flowers.”

“How many gardening books do you have? It feels like you’ve read every book on flowers that’s ever been read.” She chuckles.

“I haven’t counted in a while.”

His father sits down at the dinner table, “Nice to see you’re still reading.” Basil moves to sit down at the table but his father stops him. “Wait, wash your hands.”

“Oh yeah, I almost forgot.” His mind still feels a bit unfocused as he washes his hands, but right now isn’t a time to dwell on the past. He just needs to put all these feelings aside for a few hours, maybe that’ll help with this feeling of malaise descending on him. He sits back down, on the side of the table across from his parents. For a while, they all eat in blissful silence, though Basil has a gut feeling that his parents’ quiet is only because they’re preparing to tell him something important. The dinner, a bowl of homemade soup, is similar to the kind Polly always makes, which isn’t exactly surprising seeing as Polly and his mom likely both were following his grandmother’s recipes. Is this what it feels like to be normal; sitting together with your parents at the dinner table, eating in silence?

“So, Basil…” his mom says slowly. “We’ve been meaning to talk to you about grandma…”

Basil freezes, his spoon held midair. Oh no, he knew they would have something important to tell him about but… not this. It’s too soon to talk about it, and too late for them to pretend to care. “Y-yeah?”

His father suddenly says, “We’ve been talking and arranging plans since before we arrived in town, and we decided that the funeral will be held on Sunday.”

Sunday… two days from now?

“R-really?” He swallows. “W-w-why didn’t you tell me earlier?”

“We wanted to get everything settled before telling you.” His mom says. “We didn’t want to take you off guard by showing up and immediately telling you about it.”

As if springing it on him during dinner was less of a shock? This is unbelievable, outrageous, unfair. Basil sits in silence for a moment, confusion and anger washing over him as he fully processes the words that he’s been told.

“Y-you didn’t want to take me off guard?!” He suddenly stands up, his voice rising to a shout as he speaks. “You could have warned me before you arrived! And maybe you could have told me you were coming at all! Or you could have gotten here a month ago rather than waiting until now to do this!”

“Basil, calm down.” His father says- his face is utterly calm, but Basil feels daggers in his gaze. “I won’t try to explain myself while you’re throwing a fit like this. Sit down and when you’ve calmed down, maybe we can talk about this like adults.”

Basil clenches his fists- that’s all it is, huh? A fit? Like he’s just an unruly toddler whining about nothing? Is that really what his parents think of him? The idea makes him want to scream and break something, but the words die on his lips as his father simply looks at him impatiently.

“I said sit down.”

And Basil sits. His mom seems like she wants to say something, but turns away.

“Now then,” his father continues, “with that out of the way, we need to discuss what you’ll be wearing. We looked through your closet, and all your old dress wear is probably too small for you, so tomorrow we’ll go out and get a nice suit for you.”

The room returns to silence as they return to their food. Basil’s hands shake as he continues eating, despite his appetite being quite soured. He stares down at the soup- the same as Polly would make it, the same as his grandmother would make it, and yet something felt like it was missing. He won’t say something cliche like it lacks the love the others made it with, he’s not that hopelessly romantic, but he still can’t shake this feeling of absence. He’s angry, so very angry. He’s angry at his father, for ignoring his feelings and belittling him. He’s angry at his mother, for sitting there quietly and letting it happen. But most of all, he’s angry at himself, for being weak. He’s always been weak and spineless. Too weak to stand up for himself against his parents. Too spineless to stand the scorn of his friends. Too cowardly to just do them all a favor and-

No. Stop. He can’t go down that train of thought. Not after everything he’s overcome now. Despite everything, there are still a few people in the world who would miss him. Sunny lost an eye trying to save him from himself. Sunny nearly drowned trying to pull him out of the lake. He has to keep going for Sunny’s sake, and for Mari’s sake. That day outside the hospital, he promised her he’d keep going, no matter how hard things got. He already betrayed her once, he can’t do it again.

He keeps eating.

Half an hour or so later Basil excuses himself from the dinner table as fast as he can, putting dishes in the sink before leaving into the hallway. At first he plans to go into his room, then he considers locking himself in the bathroom, before finally deciding to turn left and enter his grandmother’s room. He isn’t entirely sure why he wants to be here, but he feels like he needs to be here for his own sake. It feels almost disrespectful to see his mom’s luggage, not yet unpacked, resting on his grandmother’s bed, but he knows that’s an irrational thing to feel. After all, his mom needs to put her stuff somewhere, the room is fairly small, and the closet is still full of his grandmother’s clothes. He sits in the chair beside the bed, as he’s done a thousand times before, and looks over at the empty bed.

If he squints a little, the bags on the bed almost look like a person laying on it.

“Hey, grandma, are you feeling any better?” That’s how he’d start most conversations with her in these past couple years. She rarely was better, but usually she’d smile, say she was feeling fine, and ask how he was doing.

“Me? I’m doing alright.” He was rarely doing well, either, but with her health so poor he always worried that making her stressed about him would only make things worse for her. She always nodded and smiled, and usually asked about how his friends were doing. “I talked with Hero today- you remember him, right? Yeah, he was always really polite. He… I don’t think he really wants to see me anymore, and I can’t exactly blame him for it ever since… you know…”

She knew about Mari’s death, not the true reason for her death of course, but she understood that he was still struggling to move on from it. She had been very fond of Mari and Sunny in those days. “Sunny? He… we still keep in touch sometimes I guess. I can’t stop thinking about that night, though. I know he forgave me for what I did but… sometimes I feel like I don’t deserve to be forgiven. Have you ever felt like that before?”

Silence.

He rests his head in his hands.

There’s a small knock on the door, he looks up as it creeps open and his mom peeks her head in. “Basil? How are you feeling?”

He looks away. “Fine…”

“I know you’ve probably been really lonely and stressed out recently, and you’re right to be frustrated right now… but your father’s been going through a lot of stress lately, too. I hope you can understand that.”

As if their pain was at all comparable, as if he could ever truly understand everything Basil has been forced to endure these past few years.

“… Do you think you’re ready to talk about it now?”

He stays quiet.

“Alright, I get it. While you're here, maybe you can look through grandma’s things and pick what you want to keep?”

He nods and she closes the door again. He slumps back in the chair. “They’ve only been here a day and they’re already driving me crazy. I almost preferred living alone.”

He looks over at the empty bed and sighs. Mom was right, as long as he’s here he should start gathering whatever he wants to keep of his grandmother’s. He opens the closet and digs through all the clothes hung up on a rack to find what hides on the ground under them. It’s mostly dusty old boxes, untouched even by Polly’s cleaning, but one thing jumps out at him immediately once he notices it. He reaches in and pulls out a simple green knitted blanket, faded and dusty from who knows how long in the closet. She had made this by-hand for him when he was just a young boy- was it for his birthday or Christmas, though? It’s been almost a decade and some of the details have gotten fuzzy, but the joy he felt at first seeing it still lingers as he holds it up.

It’s a little small now, or rather he’s gotten much taller, but that doesn’t matter to him. He sets it aside and pulls out a box it had been resting on. It’s a wooden chest, probably older than Basil judging by how worn it is. There’s no lock on it like he would have expected, but then most of the things stored away here are likely only valuable to him now. He opens it gently, as though it might break if he’s too forceful with it, and takes a moment to examine the contents before digging through them- it was mostly old papers, a few souvenirs from the rare vacations they went on, and a small photo album. He grabs a manila folder thick with papers labeled “Basil” and thumbs through it- grades, assignments, essays, most of it is school papers that most people would have thrown out years ago, but which his grandmother kept as a record of his life.

He thinks to set it aside immediately, but then he notices some different paper tucked in among the mass of schoolwork. Pulling them out, he instantly realizes what they are- drawings, some assignments for various art classes and some doodles he did in his free time. They’re fairly crude, mostly his young attempts to sketch plants but a few are drawings meant to be his friends. Looking back, he never was that good at art, he tried to learn and improve but his work never seemed to measure up, especially when compared to his friends. One drawing, however, catches his eye immediately, and he feels a hitch in his throat as he pulls it out to take a closer look.

It’s him, and his grandmother.

And his parents.

They’re all labeled; “Me”, “Grandma”, “Mom”, and “Dad”. His parents stand off to the side while he holds hands with his grandmother. He drew this for her when he was 5, eager to show off his skills at art that he’d developed in school. It isn’t very good, but she smiled and took it, because that’s just what adults do when children give them art. Back then, he always asked her about his parents, where they were, when they’d visit, why they never seemed to remember his birthday or Christmas, and she would always smile and say that they were working hard and would surely come visit as soon as they had the chance. He believed her, at first, but eventually he got older and realized they simply didn’t care about him- never have and never will.

And now they’re all he has in the world it seems. Them, Polly, and Sunny. But Polly will surely be gone before he even realizes, before he can ever truly appreciate all she’s done for him. And Sunny… perhaps their separation is for the best, being together seems to only bring misfortune for both of them- yet, he can’t imagine a world without him. He rubs his eyes and realizes they’re welling up a little, a few tears already on his cheeks. Putting the paper back in the folder, he sets it down and keeps looking around the accumulated stuff. His mom asked to pick whatever he wants to keep now that his grandmother is gone, but he knows in his heart that choosing is impossible- he wants to keep it all, even the stuff he doesn’t particularly like. If she thought they were valuable enough to keep, then he’s going to keep them. It’s the least he can do to honor her memory.

His eyes drift down to the small photo album among all the papers- it’s half the size of his own, the pages being translucent plastic sleeves to put a photo on both the front and back sides. A simple photo album, one that doesn’t allow for the details he’s added to his own, but still a useful tool for preserving photos. His grandmother always loved taking photos of important events, she always took a photo of him on his birthdays, and occasionally on Christmas- even after she gave him her camera to start his own collection she would sometimes use it to snap a photo of him. Even when he was lost and alone, she kept at it until she could barely even get out of bed due to the pain and weakness of her body. It was their way to bond, even when he was at his lowest. Even when he himself lost the passion or desire to ever take a photo again. His hands shake a little as he holds it up, as though it’s so heavy that just lifting it is a struggle.

He opens it.

The photos go back decades, some are from before his parents were even born. The oldest were in black and white: childhood photos of his grandmother in the late 1930s into the 1940s; her father in a military uniform; her and Basil’s grandfather- the man he was named after, who died before he was even born- when they were young. Strange to think she grew up in such a different world from today, what might the world look like when he’s in his 70s? He keeps flipping forward to see them married with children, and those children grow up- his mother’s entire life all summarized in a single collection of photos. Records of major milestones in the road that brought her to where she is now.

He stops on a photo.

His parents look so young, only a few years older than he is now. His father is dressed in a suit not too dissimilar to the one he wears now, but the coat is simply draped over his shoulders like some kind of cape. He’s smiling, but he’s clearly quite nervous- his mother seems oblivious, however, leaning on him with a big smile on her face. She wears a white dress and a flower bracelet on her wrist. Wearily, he pulls the photo out of the sleeve and checks the back for any sort of caption.

‘5/12/76 - Amanda on her first date. Albert asked her out to a school dance, but judging by his face I don’t think he expected her to actually say yes.’

He’s heard the story of how his parents met before, his grandmother told it a few times when he was a kid but it always sounded exaggerated. Too perfect. Too much like a romcom. Love at first sight, years of complicated schemes to court each other, and all manner of silly escapades with friends. It couldn’t be the truth, people always embellish such stories when they get older and only remember the best or worst times of their youth. Day-to-day life is just a boring blur, one day bleeding into the next until something big happens that shakes you from your comfortable routine.

He puts the photo away and moves on through the next couple holidays and vacations until he reaches the one he was looking for: his parents’ wedding. They’re both dressed impeccably for the occasion, and their smiles are warm and eager as they await the next stage of their lives. He pulls it out and looks at the caption.

‘8/22/86 - Amanda and Albert tying the knot. Took them long enough!’

A small smile crosses Basil’s face when he reads the caption. He’s not surprised at all that his grandmother would be so impatient after a decade of dating with no marriage. Even with him she would sometimes inquire about girls he liked, especially when he started high school- occasionally she even teased about him and Aubrey having something going on. That always embarrassed him, not because he had any romantic feelings for Aubrey, but because he was a bit ashamed to admit that he didn’t have a crush on her, or any girls for that matter. Even now he’s never had a crush on a girl, and sometimes he worries there might be something off about him because of it.

Putting it away, he turns his attention to the next major photo. He’s seen it before, and even if he hadn’t he doesn’t need the caption on the back to tell him what it shows. Still, he reads it anyway.

‘2/18/88 - Little Basil is born! I rushed as fast as I could when I heard the news, I just couldn’t wait to see my grandson. Albert seems a little concerned however, he says his new job might make raising a child difficult for them.’

His mother looks so happy, young Basil wrapped in a blanket in her arms. His father stood to the side of the hospital bed, a small smile crossing his face. Just looking at their smiles sickens him- how could they be so happy now, yet ditch him so quickly after he was born? Was there something wrong with him? Or is making money really more important to them than their own son? He almost wants to rip the photo apart, but he wouldn’t dare disrespect his grandmother’s memory by destroying her cherished possession like that.

He quickly moves on, for his own sake, but from here on the photos become extremely familiar to him- because they’re all his life. His birthdays, holidays, the few vacations his grandmother took him on over the years. Him at the age of 6, ready for his first day of elementary school, dressed in a green collar shirt and khaki shorts. Next to that, he and Aubrey together at the park around age 8. He smiles mournfully- once she had been his best friend, before he had met Sunny and subsequently latched onto him. Perhaps Aubrey was lucky in that, not being beholden to his attachment issues to the same degree as Sunny would end up being. Now, she likely hates him more than anyone else in the world, even before she learned the truth of Mari’s death. Despite that, despite her constant name-calling and harassment over the past four years, despite even the narrowly avoided case of voluntary manslaughter; he still wishes that the two could somehow rekindle the bond they had at that time.

He keeps going through the album, through the years of school and the new friends he made. He flips so fast he reaches the end before he even realizes it. His throat catches a little as he looks down at the last photo of the album. The last photo his grandmother had ever taken, before she was too weak to even get out of bed.

It’s Basil, sitting at the end of the dinner table. A small strawberry cake is on the table in front of him, just large enough for two people to share, with two candles on top placing his age at 15. He looks tired, but he tries his best to put on a smile for his grandmother. He smiles now and, despite the pain in his heart, he feels a small spark of genuine happiness in that moment. Even when he was at his lowest, even when he didn’t deserve to be loved, she was there for him. She didn’t quite understand what was wrong with him, because he would never dare admit it, but she supported him anyway. If only there were a way to thank her, if only he had the mind to do that while she was still here. He wipes tears from his eyes- he’ll have to make her proud somehow. He closes the photo album and continues looking through the old trinkets and keepsakes, all of it equally priceless. Hours pass without him noticing as he gets lost in the past, in everything he cherished most and everything he lost.

His reminiscence is broken by a knock on the door and the soft creak of the hinges as it opens.

“Basil?” His mother says. “Are you done in here? It’s getting a bit late.”

“Yeah… I-I’ll just take all this to my room.” He collects the objects as best he can and carries them all out.

“Need help carrying all that?” His mother asks.

“I’m fine.” He leaves to his room as fast as he can without tripping and gently sets everything down on the floor. He looks up at the clock- 9:30 PM, perhaps now would be a good time to get ready for bed. He quickly changes into pajamas and rushes to the bathroom to wash up. As he washes his hands he takes a good long look in the mirror. The scars on his face from his fight with Sunny have almost entirely faded, but looking closely he can still see them. He’s lucky, his injuries will eventually disappear entirely- Sunny’s will stay with him for the rest of his life. He looks down at his forearms. At the old scars he still bears there, and elsewhere on his body. Even these, he knows, will eventually fade, though it may take years and years for them to fully disappear. Someday he’ll wake up and look in the mirror to find the wounds have all vanished, like they were never there at all.

Hopefully.

He brushes his teeth and leaves the bathroom intent to go straight to his room, but stops to look into the living room first. His parents are watching TV together, just the news right now however. His mother glances back and sees him.

“Are you going to bed, Basil?” Her face is cast in darkness by the light of the TV behind her, rendering her face a shadow to him.

He nods.

“Alright. Good night.” She turns back to the TV.

“See you in the morning.” He says before returning to his room.

Chapter Text

The sun rises on a new day in Faraway Town, USA. Another calm summer day like any other, marked by a very light sprinkling of rain in the morning. Faraway Town is no different from any other small suburban town that lay on the periphery of a large American city, its only claim to any local notoriety being the vintage hobby shop known as Hobbeez, which is visited regularly by people from well out of town. As morning dawns, bright and golden over the blue sky, the town slowly stirs awake like a man reluctantly rising after his alarm clock goes off.

6:30 AM

Hero sits up in his bed and stretches his arms, the first up in the Montoya household as always. The light is only just creeping into the room from the north-facing window, casting it in a soft yellow glow. He enjoys the quiet stillness of the morning in Faraway Town, it’s one thing he always misses when he’s in college- in the city, every morning is marked with the constant bustle of people walking and driving. He doesn’t hate that racket as much as some people he’s met, but he’ll always prefer mornings in tranquil silence more.

Climbing out of bed, he casts his eyes to the other side of the room where Kel still snores softly under his jumbled mess of a blanket. He’s grown so much the past four years, it seems like he’s due for a slightly larger bed soon- strange to think his little brother is almost larger than him now.

He lays out an outfit for the day, a blue t-shirt and khaki shorts, before quietly making his way out of the room- Kel is a very heavy sleeper, but he always makes sure to keep quiet in the mornings just in case. Into the bathroom he goes to wash up and get ready for the day. As he dries off from his bath he looks into the mirror, closely examining the stubble on his cheeks- he shaved a couple days ago but already it’s starting to grow in again. Maybe it’d look good to grow it out a little, try out a mustache or beard? Nah, maybe another time. Once he’s done shaving and brushing his teeth he sneaks back into his and Kel’s room and puts on the clothes he laid out.

He heads downstairs, making sure to not make too much noise so he doesn’t wake his parents; he isn’t worried about them knowing he’s up, of course, but they needed the rest with how much they deal with Sally’s crying lately. Slipping his shoes on he heads out for his morning jog through the neighborhood. He takes a moment to glance at Sunny’s house as he passes by it- the new residents just arrived recently, and their belongings have all been unpacked, but Hero hasn’t had the time to greet them yet. He keeps going through the neighborhood, occasionally waving at the few people out, mostly people jogging like him or heading to an early job. It’s raining, but so lightly he barely even notices it aside from an occasional larger droplet on his head. It almost feels more like spring than summer, which he’s grateful for. Better a light rain than unrelenting heat. He takes a meandering route through the neighborhood, enjoying the sights of suburban life in the early morning. The rest of the family won’t be up for a while, he can take as much time as he wants and likely be back around when everyone else wakes up.

Which gives him more than enough time to pay Mari a little visit. He’s been pretty busy these past few days, his parents constantly putting him up to work around the house for them since they don’t seem to trust Kel much to get any of it done, she’d probably really appreciate him stopping by. He wishes he had some flowers on him for her, but even she might get a little tired of flowers if he brings them every time he visits. They’ll just die eventually, anyways. He enters the church on his way back- nobody else is there right now, aside from the priest, who always seems to be up bright and early to tend to the building and deal with whatever paperwork priests need to worry about.

“Good morning, Hero.” The priest smiles and nods to him. He’s been here often enough in the past month that the priest has come to know and expect his occasional visits- sometimes alone, sometimes with Kel and Aubrey.

“Good morning, father.”

He can’t remember the last time his family went to church every Sunday, or why exactly they stopped in the first place, but he figures he’s probably visited more in the past month than in the previous year. He needed to make up for lost time, after all, since he hadn’t paid Mari a visit for four years. Stepping out into the graveyard, he takes a moment to take in somber tranquility- he’s all alone, not even Old Beardy is loitering around the cemetery yet. He walks through the rows of graves, noting every name as he passes, until he reaches the one he’s come for.

OUR DEAREST,

MARI SUZUKI

1 MAR. 1985 - 22 OCT. 2000

THE SUN SHINED BRIGHTER WHEN SHE WAS HERE.

It certainly did.

“Hey, Mari,” he says, “sorry for not visiting recently, been a little busy. I know I shouldn’t worry too much, I’m sure Kel and Aubrey have been keeping you company just fine but… I’ve left you alone for too long already.” He sits down in the grass by the headstone and places a hand on it.

“I know, I know, I need to move on…” he sighs, “I thought I was before, but I was just lying to myself. When I saw Sunny and Aubrey again, I realized how little I actually had- seeing your grave, reconciling with them, saving Basil, I thought I was beginning the process, but then Sunny told the truth and… I don’t know, I feel like I’m right back at square one again.”

He hasn’t admitted this to anyone else, not even Kel truly knows what he’s going through. The only person he was ever able to admit his feelings to so openly was Mari. She knew it all, his doubts, his fears, his dreams- and he knew the same of her. That was the cornerstone of their relationship, a shared understanding which they had with none but each other.

“What they did… it’s hard to wrap my head around honestly. I can’t help but feel like we failed them. They were our responsibility, we cared for them, taught them, tried to be good role models for them- what does this coverup say about us then?” It’s something he’s been grappling with all month, since he learned the truth. What drove Basil to believe he needed to cover up Mari’s death? Their friends never would have held it against Sunny in the long term if they knew from the beginning. Sure, things would have been rocky at first, but they would have been able to work through it all together.

“I know , Mari. I know I shouldn’t blame myself for their actions but I just… I can’t help but feel responsible for them. Thinking about what they’ve done, I get so angry sometimes.” He clenches a fist. “How? How could they have done this to you? How could I have let this happen? I should have been able to see how stressed Sunny was with his violin- we should have.”

But the past is gone, he can’t change it no matter how many scenarios he invents in his head, how many possible choices he could have made to avert the present. He knows this, although he does not like to admit it, because what he must truly do is even more daunting than trying to change the past- he must look to the future, so that next time he won’t have to think ‘if only I did this differently’.

“You’re right, Mari. As usual.” He looks out across the cemetery for a moment in silence. “I need to look out for him- for Basil. We almost lost him twice, I fear if there’s a third time he won’t have anyone there to save him. But… it hurts to be around him,” he pulls his legs close, feeling like a lost child as he does so, “I try to be polite, try to keep a look of confidence, but it’s hard to see him without thinking of you- without thinking of what he did to you.”

‘Do you hate him?’ He can practically hear Mari asking him that question. She always knew how to cut to the point like that, it’s something he loves, or loved, about her.

“I don’t know, but I know I don’t want to lose him. As long as he’s still with us, we might have a chance to fix things.” He sits in silence for a moment, taking in the morning light as the sprinkle of rain continues. Mari used to love hanging out on slow summer days like this, sometimes with the others but sometimes just the two of them together. Their own private moments to vent, to dream, to simply cherish each other’s company. Now it’s all gone, wiped away like his tears in the morning rain.

“Mari, I… I feel so lost right now. Ever since Sunny told us the truth, nothing has felt right anymore. I thought I knew Sunny. I thought I knew Basil. But neither of them seem to be who I thought they were. What should I do?”

The only response he gets is a gentle rustle of wind through the trees.

He lets out a deep sigh and stands up. “I’m sorry if my venting was a little much. I don’t really have anyone else to tell this to. Aubrey and Kel already have so much on their plates, I don’t want to increase their burdens with my problems. In any case, I should get going now, need to be home for breakfast. I’ll be sure to bring Aubrey and Kel next time, I know you like seeing us all together.”

He puts his hands in his pockets and begins leaving, but stops and turns around. “Oh, before I go, I need to ask you something- do you think it’d look good if I grew out my facial hair a little?” 

Silence, Hero lets out a quiet chuckle and shakes his head. “Yeah, you’re right.” He takes one last look at the headstone, “I’ll always love you, Mari. Until the day I die.”

7:15 AM

Morning has always been the worst time of day for Aubrey, even when she was a kid. Before he left, her dad would usually be out for work and her mom has never been very functional in the morning, leaving her to take care of herself and make sure she was on time for the school bus. It’s even worse now, with her dad gone and her mom even more dysfunctional than before- which is why, for the past 20 minutes, Aubrey has been laying in bed awake. She can afford to, not like she needs to be anywhere early. Perhaps she should just go back to bed for a few more hours.

Drip. Drip. Drip.

Her ears perk up to the sound, she sits up in bed and looks around at the ceiling until she spots it- another leak. Goddamnit, she patched that spot up days ago. It’s not even raining that heavily out. This house, it’ll be the death of her if she doesn’t get out as soon as she can. She reluctantly rises from her bed and grabs the bucket she keeps in her room to contain such leaks. The fact this is such a common occurrence that she needs a dedicated leak-containing bucket doesn’t make it any less frustrating- in fact, it makes it even more frustrating that she has to put up with this so much. None of her friends seem to have this problem.

Once she puts the bucket in place she gives Bun-bun a small pat on the head, the albino rabbit seeming very content. His food seems to be a bit low, better get some more soon. She digs through a basket of clean laundry and picks out a white shirt and underwear for the day, then picks up her denim skirt from yesterday and gives it a good look over, deciding it can probably be worn another day before she needs to wash it. It might be on its third day, but nobody else will notice. Gathering up her clothes, she opens the entrance to the attic and climbs down into the hallway. Trash is strewn across the floor, Aubrey knows she should probably clean it up one of these days but it’s all her mom’s trash- why can’t she pick up her own shit for once? Kicking aside a few discarded beer cans she enters the bathroom, ironically one of the cleaner rooms in the house. After setting her clothes on by the sink, she starts going through her usual motions in the morning; brush her teeth, floss, relieve herse-

The toilet is clogged.

The fucking toilet is clogged.

“Oh wow that’s real nice. Thanks, mom.” She groans to herself as she holds the toilet lid open. Fortunately, she’s dealt with this before, so she quickly pulls the plunger out from under the sink and gets to work, grumbling the whole time. Why does she have to be the plumber in this house? And the handyman, and the garbageman, and the cook. She’s only sixteen,  she should be focusing on making friends and growing as a person, not how to keep her dilapidated house from falling apart at the seams. She sighs, it’s all because her stupid father had to drop everything and leave the moment he found a woman prettier than her mom. If she ever sees that bastard again, there’s going to hell to pay.

With the toilet cleared, she puts the plunger aways and gets back to her regular morning routine. As she stands before the mirror drying off from her bath she takes a close look at her hairline, noting that her hair has grown out enough that her natural color is showing through around her scalp. Perhaps it’d be nice to go with her natural hair color for a change, but washing the color out might take a long time. She grabs her teal contacts, then decides against them for the day. She looks into the mirror again, into her eyes- brown like her mom’s, brown like Mari’s.

She takes a deep breath and sighs, she probably shouldn’t read too much into her eye color like that. Out of the bathroom and into the living room she goes, and as expected her mom is already on the couch- she’s always there, often it seems like she sleeps on the couch more often than in her actual bed.

“Morning, Aubs.” Her mom says as she flips through channels absentmindedly.

“Morning.” Aubrey grumbles. “Saw the little ‘gift’ you left in the bathroom earlier.”

Her mom gives a confused look before saying, “Oh, yeah. Sorry, I meant to get around to cleaning it but I was tired and it must have slipped my mind.” Ugh, typical excuse, she’s always too tired, or busy with something else, or just plain forgot about it. Best to just ignore it, complaining never gets her to change her behavior. Aubrey moves into the kitchen and glances into the fridge- mostly dirty and expired food as usual. She pulls out the carton of milk and gives the contents a sniff. Eugh, disgusting, she could have sworn she had only bought this a week ago. Oh well, down the drain the milk goes, and into the trash the carton goes. The rest of the food isn’t much better here, whether refrigerated or not. Aubrey is shockingly used to this, often preferring to eat out or order delivery than make food for herself. She’d clean the fridge out, but it seems like they rarely ever eat what’s in there and it always all goes bad. She checks the cabinets and grabs a single package of peanut butter crackers- that will have to hold her over until lunch.

Nothing else to do in the living room, what with her mom hogging the couch as always, Aubrey decides to return to her room to watch some TV there instead. Not many choices for channels, but she’s learned to simply accept whatever happens to be on at the time. She picks up Bun-bun and sets him in her lap as she watches, and for a moment she’s almost able to ignore the diminished yet still present dripping of the leak. Ignore the sounds of her mom downstairs. Ignore everything except this small sliver of the world- just a girl and her little white rabbit watching TV. Suddenly, she’s broken from her reverie by a new noise- soft yet at the same time impossible to miss. Something moves out of the corner of her eye, she looks but before she can get a good look the thing scurries back into the hole in the wall near the TV. She doesn’t need to see it to know what it is, though. A rat, or maybe a mouse. And where there’s one, there’s probably more.

Great, just what she needs, pests. She’ll have to get new mouse traps whenever she has the time to stop by Fix-It. And maybe she should finally get around to cleaning all the trash in the living room? No, that’s her mom’s shit, she needs to clean it up herself. Even if it’s getting too high to manage. Even if she never will clean it.

8:00 AM

A cry rings out through the house, high and shrill, like a fire alarm. It jolts Kel awake from his peaceful dreams, and he knows immediately what it is. He sighs, his baby sister is the sweetest little thing in the world but when she’s upset she can scream louder than any adult he’s ever met. He rolls out of bed and checks the time- it’s early, but not an unreasonable time to wake up. Hero is already out of bed, as usual, and likely has already gone on a morning jog. He used to hate exercise; he used to be winded after only a few minutes of running, but something changed in him. Now he’s always the first one awake in the morning so he can take a jog through the neighborhood. Now he’s strong enough to dive in a lake and drag two drowning people out at the same time.

Brains and brawn, he really does have it all it seems.

Kel exits his room and goes downstairs to peek into the living room. His dad is relaxing on the couch when he takes notice of Kel.

“Mornin’, champ. Did Sally wake you again?”

“Yeah.” He can hear her crying still up in his parents’ room, his mom is probably changing her diapers right now. He enters the kitchen, finding Hero rinsing off a plate in the sink. “Top of the mornin’!”

“Oh, good morning, Kel.” Hero smiles as he scrubs off the plate. “Sally wake you?”

“Yeah, at least it didn’t happen at 4 in the morning like last time.” He chuckles lightly. “You’re lucky, you get to spend a lot of the year living on your own so you don’t gotta listen to her as much.”

“I’m not alone, I have a roommate.” He never talks about his roommate, Kel has noticed- perhaps they don’t really know each other well? “Besides, even with all the noise Sally can make, I’d much rather be here than anywhere else.”

“Anyways,” Kel opens a cabinet and grabs a box of cereal. “I’ve been thinking about seeing a movie, anything good coming out soon?”

“Hmm,” Hero thinks for a moment, “I think that new Outlaw Blues movie is coming out next week.”

“Oh right! Yeah, that might be fun! The show was really good.” He grins, it’s been a while since the two of them went out to see a movie. Hero has been in college since the end of last summer, barring holidays and winter break. As the two talk, Kel retrieves a bowl and milk before sitting down at the dining table and pouring out a bowl of cereal for himself. “Maybe we could ask Aubrey to join us, too.”

“Maybe, could even invite all her other friends. I bet Kim and Vance are really good at sneaking snacks into theaters.” He chuckles and hands Kel a clean spoon for his cereal, which he had not realized he forgot.

“Hero, I never thought I’d hear you endorse breaking the rules like that.”

“Well, movie snacks are a total scam and everyone knows it!” He takes a seat at the table, though he’s already eaten. “You can get the same stuff at any gas station or convenience store for half the price.”

“Makes sense!” Hero always knows so much like that. Kel rarely pays attention to price differences like that, usually because he isn’t the one paying for it, but maybe he should start paying more attention to that kind of stuff.

“Speaking of Aubrey, we’ll be picking her up for lunch around noon.”

“Picking her up?” He raises an eyebrow in confusion- weren’t they just going to go to a nearby place like Gino’s?

“Yeah, we talked to Aubrey yesterday, remember? She’s tired of eating at the same few restaurants every day so we’re going to go up to the mall instead.”

Oh, right, the conversation completely slipped his mind. Yesterday evening when Hero came home from the grocery store, Aubrey was helping him carry the stuff inside and the three talked a bit. “Ahh, yeah you’re right.”

Aubrey, she’s changed a lot these past few years, but she still seems to be the same in a lot of ways, despite her insistence to the contrary. Looking back, he really should have talked to her sooner, but he was too afraid of accidentally offending her like he did Hero- and then she formed her little posse of hooligans and even if he wanted to talk to her he had someone like Kim or Mikhail standing in the way.

“Kel!” His mom suddenly enters the room, having evidently finished changing Sally. “When you’re finished with breakfast, could you take out the trash?”

“Morning to you, too.” Kel grumbles.

After finishing up breakfast and getting dressed for the day, Kel grabs the large trash bag, full of the collected waste of every trash can in the house, and heads out into the morning light. The light rain has stopped by now, and the sun seems to be making quick work of the puddles in the sidewalk. By noon it probably won’t look like it rained at all.

Maybe there’s something poetic in that, or maybe not. Kel’s never been good at poetry. Mari probably would have something poetic to say about it, she always made such insightful comments on everyday things. If not her, then maybe Basil.

He spares a glance at Sunny and Mari’s old house before continuing to the large trash bin to dispose of his smelly cargo.

“Hey Kel!” He’s slightly startled by the unexpected voice and turns to see Cris standing outside her front door. She’s in a pink tank top and black shorts, and her blue hair is done up in a ponytail. “Was just going for a jog and who do I happen to run into?” She walks up to the fence separating their front yards and leans on it.

“Heh, well we’re neighbors after all.”

“Yeah but I mean, we haven’t really seen each other much lately have we?” She rests her chin on the fence, which for Kel reached only around his chest, but for Cris it’s nearly the same height as her. “I know you’ve been spending time with your brother and all, but if I didn’t know any better I’d think you were avoiding me.”

“What? No! I would never. I just, well, like you said I’ve been busy with family.” He chuckles awkwardly. He’s definitely been avoiding her, not because of anything she did but because he’s been entirely focused on reconnecting with Aubrey and trying their best to work through everything Sunny had told them- and he just didn’t want to get her, or anyone else, involved when she didn’t need to.

“You free right now?”

“Uh, no actually I need to help my mom with some chores as you can see.” He holds up the trash bag for emphasis as he puts it in the bin.

“Maybe later?”

“I’m going to get lunch with my brother and a friend.”

She sighs, “You mean Aubrey? I don’t get why you hang out with her all of a sudden, to me she just looks like trouble.”

Kel chuckles lightly, “I’ve known her since childhood, she acts tough but she’s a softie deep down.”

Cris smiles, “Alright, if you’re so busy today I’ll leave you to it- but don’t think you can get out of it tomorrow!” With that she turns and runs off for her morning jog.

“Yeah… Tomorrow.” He sighs and goes back inside.

8:30 AM

Basil awakens to the smell of something being cooked and for a moment he hopes it’s Polly already making breakfast for him- but then his hope becomes disappointment as he remembers who actually would be cooking breakfast for him today. He slips out of bed and stretches his arms a little. Thankfully, unlike the previous night, he hadn’t had any nightmares to wake him up, and the dream he had is already fading from his mind as he steps out the door into the hallway.

“Good morning, Basil!” His mother exclaims as he enters the living room. “I hope you’re hungry, breakfast is almost ready.”

“Morning.” He mutters as he moves to the dining room table and sits down to await his food. He can smell the cooking bacon on the air, and with that likely eggs of some kind, as is standard.

“You feeling better today?”

“Yeah…”

“Good! I was worried about you when you went to bed in such a foul mood.” She smiles over her shoulder as she continues to work on the stovetop. A moment of silence falls between the two, which seems to stretch for an eternity before his mother finally speaks up again. “Don’t tell your father this, but I think you were right last night. We probably should have dealt with all this earlier, rather than putting it off until now.”

He perks up a little- his mother agrees with him on this? “Why didn’t you say anything last night?”

She sighs, “Well, your father can be extremely stubborn once he’s set his mind on something- I’ve learned when he’s like that it’s better to just nod along than try to argue.” As she speaks she puts the finishing touches on a plate and walks over to set it down in front of Basil.

“And, why didn’t you come sooner?”

“Ask your father that, it was his choice.” There’s a brief change to her face before she turns away. What was that look- regret maybe? Guilt? Whatever it is, she doesn’t want him to see it.

Suddenly, as though summoned by Basil’s mother mentioning him, Basil’s father enters the room, clean and dressed for the day. “Good morning,” he sits down at the table as Basil’s mother sets out food and coffee for him. Mother joins them, and soon the entire family is once again eating together at the dinner table. “So, we’ll leave for the mall in a few hours, the department stores there should have some good suits for you, Basil.”

“Alright.” Basil nods as he eats.

“Oh, Basil,” his mother says after a while of eating, “there’s something I wanted to ask you about.”

He freezes, bracing for whatever she has to say. “Y-yeah?”

“When I looked through your clothes yesterday, I saw a few loose photos not in your photo album- I was worried they might have fallen out but it didn’t look like there were any empty spaces in the album.” Oh no, she saw the new photos and flipped through his photo album? “I saw the photo you took of your friend Sunny, it’s very nice but…”

He swallows hard, knowing exactly what she’s likely going to ask about, “But what?”

“Why does he have an eyepatch?”

“It was an accident!” He blurts out suddenly. “I- I mean yeah an accident. It was a year ago and-and we were heading home from school one day when suddenly-”

His mother chuckles, “Alright, alright, no need to tell the whole story. I believe you.”

“He seems to be doing well despite it.” Basil’s father says. Basil certainly hopes he’s doing well in his new home, he sounded… okay when they talked the previous night but he could have just been avoiding some of the harder topics- after all, with the truth out and his new living situation with his eye, adjusting to a new house is probably the least of his concerns.

Basil looks down at the floor, “Yeah…”

“What’s wrong?” His mom asks.

“I… I guess I just miss him.”

He looks up to see his mom smile at him, “I’m sure he misses you just as much, dear. Maybe he’ll even pay a visit eventually.”

“Yeah… maybe.”

Chapter Text

“Hey” Basil’s mother pokes her head into his room a few hours later. He looks up from the book he’s reading on his bed. “Are you ready to go?”

He nods, “Just give me a minute.” He closes the book and looks it over- it’s a book on botany, one he had started years ago, before everything fell apart. After that day, he had lost his passion for reading, and it languished on his bookshelf for years- now, though, he feels it’s time to start brushing up on his books. At the very least, they’re a convenient way to keep his parents out of his hair for a while. He gets up and sets the book on his nightstand before heading out to get his shoes on.

A few minutes later and the three head out to the car, a fairly new white mid-size car- probably a rental vehicle, and definitely not the same as the car they used last time they visited. No surprise there, he’s not sure they even own a car on a permanent basis with how often they travel.

The car ride is entirely silent at first, save for the sound of the radio- his father flips channels regularly, clearly not finding whatever station he’s looking for. He stares out the window and watches the buildings and people pass by- life goes on as normal, as it always has been, everyone oblivious to his loss. Just as it was when Mari died.

“Since we’re heading to the mall,” Basil’s mom suddenly speaks up, “we should plan on some other things to do. Make an event out of the day! It’s been a long time since we did anything like that.” His father nods, although his focus still seems torn between the road and the radio. She looks back at him, “What do you think?”

“Sure.” Basil mutters.

His mother rubs her chin in thought, “I’m not too familiar with this area but we could probably find something to eat around here.”

“I’ve been to the mall a few times,” he says, “but it’s been a few years to be honest, some things might have changed.”

“Well, we can always just explore the area.” Basil’s father pitches in.

“Oh! I just thought of something.” Basil’s mother turns to him and smiles. “What if we got you a haircut? It looks like you haven’t had a trim in a while, and you don’t want to look messy tomorrow when all your relatives arrive.”

What? His hair? It’s not messy, he always takes care of his hair, more than most people he’s met. He’s still using a conditioner brand that Mari recommended him years ago. He washes every day. How could it be messy? He’s had some days where it was hard to do a lot of basic things, but even at his worst he always takes care of his hair at least.

“I agree.” His father says. “You should try for something a little more… professional.”

“But- I- I…” He tries to speak but he can’t form the words, he knows he can’t argue his way out of this if his dad is for it now. He averts his eyes from his parents in shame, turning to look out the window again. “I guess…”

It’s fine. It’s fine. It’s just a little haircut, a haircut has never hurt anyone. Everything is going to be okay. It’s just hair, it’s not that important, right? And it’ll always grow back if he doesn’t like the new style they give him.

“Everything is going to be okay…” he mutters.

“Huh? You say something?” His mother glances at him with a confused look.

“N- Nothing.” He turns back to the window and watches the road pass by. They’re already close to the mall, he can tell from the familiar buildings around it. Suddenly, out of the corner of his eye, he sees something outside the car- but when he tries to look at it, it’s already gone.

Once they arrive it’s fairly easy to find a parking spot, today evidently not being a very active day at the mall. Basil steps out of the car and takes a long look at the wide, flat building complex before them. How long has it been since he last visited? It had to have been before Mari died, after that day he rarely went this far from home unless absolutely necessary. A sudden gust of wind blows through, and he feels the flower pin in his hair move a little before he reaches for it instinctively- wouldn’t want it to fall off while he’s walking inside, after all.

“So uh… What should we do first?” Basil asks reluctantly, glancing over at his parents as they step out and grab a few things from the car.

“Clothes, that should be our main priority.” His father says.

“Yeah, we should get the important stuff out of the way before anything else.” His mother agrees.

Basil nods along and follows as they set off. Thankfully, the department stores are easy to find because they’re so large, and many of the entrances into the mall are through the big stores. Looking around at the entrance, he realizes how rarely he’s been in one of these big department stores- his grandmother was always one for thrift stores, instead, always selling his old small clothes to buy new ones. Money wasn’t a major concern, thanks to his parents covering living expenses, but she still always was adamant that it was better to buy at a thrift shop than constantly buying brand new clothes. He’s inclined to agree, if only because these department stores are overwhelming to him in how much they have to offer.

His mother points in a direction, “I see the sign for the boys’ section over there.”

He follows his parents in silence as they discuss the plans for tomorrow. He largely tunes it out, not really caring about what they’re talking about, and instead stares down at his feet as he walks. How many times will he even wear this suit? Once? Maybe twice? Then it’ll be back in the closet, where he’ll likely never see it until years later when, once again, it’ll be too small for him. Not like there are any other formal events he’ll be attending any time soon, after all. His parents herd him over to the right section of the store and begin looking through formalwear, occasionally holding up a suit and asking each other-not him, each other-how it looks on him. He nods along, just waiting for when this ends.

“Maybe you should try these on in the changing room?” His mother suddenly asks as she holds up a loose collection of clothes.

“Alright.” He takes the clothes from her and looks around for the changing room. Thankfully, it doesn’t take long for him to find one nearby, and he quickly slips into one of the rooms, which feels far too similar to a public bathroom stall for his comfort. He looks into the mirror on the wall- there’s nothing behind him, thankfully. He starts trying things on, and at least now without his parents he can decide for himself what best suits him. Most, however, simply don’t seem to fit just right. Shirt just a bit too large, pants slightly too tight, suit jacket simply uncomfortable.

After a while of testing, he finally gets on the ones that fit him best. Black coat, black pants, white shirt, all that’s missing is the tie. Looking himself over in the mirror, the amount of black in the outfit feels strange, especially with how it clashes with the pink flower pin in his bright blond hair. He holds up a black tie- he doesn’t know how to tie it and he doesn’t want to ask his dad right now. Of course, so much black is standard for a funeral, but his grandma probably wouldn’t like seeing him dressed in such dreary attire. She loved how he wanted to always dress bright and colorfully, especially how he wasn’t afraid to wear more “girly” colors like pink. Even just a green tie would be nice right now, but it is what it is. He changes back into his normal clothes and returns to his parents with the outfit he’s picked.

After making their purchases the three leave into the rest of the mall. The place seems mostly the same, but Basil immediately notices a few empty rooms where shops have closed in the years since he last visited. Odd, you’d think others would rush to fill the spaces. They walk through the ground level of the mall and glance at all the stores they pass by. Mostly niche stuff like furniture, candles, and those strange gimmick products they advertise on TV all the time. He takes note of a new video game store that wasn’t there before, but keeps moving with his parents.

“Let me stop here for a moment.” He turns to see his mother pointing at a store of women’s beauty products.

“We’ll wait out here.” His father says. She enters the building, leaving Basil and his father alone.

Then, silence.

He glances at his father, standing with his arms crossed. It’s strange how close the two are in height now, although Basil is still a few inches shorter. Last he saw his father he still was towered over by him, now they practically see eye-to-eye- although only in the most literal sense. His father looks back, Basil quickly turns away and pretends he hadn’t been looking at him.

“So…” His father speaks after a moment. “Is there anything you want to do today?”

“Not really…” Basil stares down at his feet awkwardly. “Maybe the book store?”

“Alright,” his father goes silent again before speaking up. “I’m going to use the bathroom, wait here for your mom.” He walks away quickly, leaving Basil all alone. He sighs, and looks for a place to sit down- it’d be awkward to just stand around in the middle of this public place for however long it takes his mother to browse the store. Thankfully, there’s a bench nearby, and only one person is sitting on it right now.

“D-do you mind if I sit here?” He asks as he approaches the bench.

The black-haired girl glances up from her book and looks at him curiously through her brown spectacles. There’s something familiar about her, he realizes, but he can’t quite remember where they might have met. A classmate maybe? Yeah, that must be it. “Oh, sure, I won’t mind!”

He sits down and crosses his legs as he waits for either parent to return- although their absence is not at all unwelcome at this moment. He glances at the girl, she’s discreetly looking at him, but quickly turns away when she realizes he’s looking back at her.

She suddenly speaks up after another moment of silence. “Um, this might be an odd question… but, a-are you Basil?”

Huh? She knows him? Well, sure, she’s likely a classmate, but most classmates never bother to remember his name. “Y-yeah, why? D-do I know you from somewhere?”

“You’re a friend of Kel’s, right?”

“It’s… complicated.” He looks down at the ground, finding it hard to keep eye contact with her for such an evasive answer to an honest question.

She tilts her head curiously, “I was at the park last month and I saw him get into a fight to help you out, so I just assumed you were friends. Sorry if I made a rude assumption.”

“Nonono i-it’s fine it’s just…” He sighs deeply, “I, uh, could actually use someone to talk to right now.”

“Well I’m here to listen, if you want.” She smiles and sets down her sketchbook, “I’m Mincy, by the way.”

He thinks for a moment, “A-A lot, I guess. I’ve been feeling so overwhelmed recently. So much has changed recently, it’s hard for me to keep up with it all. My… My grandma passed away recently, and now my parents decide to enter my life again after years of not caring about me in the slightest and immediately start ordering me around. A-And it’s not like I have anyone who can help me with all this because all my friends hate me now and it’s entirely my fault.”

“Oh that… that’s a lot .” Mincy says after a moment.

“I-I’m sorry for dumping all this on you when we’ve just met.”

She smiles awkwardly, “Oh no it’s fine! If you don’t mind me asking, why do you think your friends don’t like you anymore?”

“I…” He stops- he really should not have mentioned that to a complete stranger. “I don’t want to talk about it. I-It’s too personal.”

“Alright, I won’t press on it.” She pauses for a moment to think, “I’m sorry for your grandma, although I’m sure you’re already sick and tired of hearing those words. I know when my grandfather passed I… I couldn’t stand how hollow such words of sympathy felt, but it’s hard to think of anything better to say.”

Basil nods, “It’s fine, not many people have actually spoken to me about it, to be honest. Sometimes it feels like I’m the only person who even cares that she died.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. It’s hard to imagine what it must feel like, to be honest.”

“It’s okay. I just… I’m not sure where to go after all of this, after everything I’ve done and everything that’s happened to me.” He looks down at his hands, “After all the ways I’ve hurt my friends, how can I move on?”

“Maybe…” She bites her lip nervously as she thinks, “If you’ve burnt so many bridges with your olds friends, maybe you should focus on finding new friends instead? You can’t undo your mistakes, or force your friends to accept you again, but you can work on yourself going forward. ”

“But… how?”

“Perhaps you can try to reinvent yourself, find a new passion in life and develop it.” She gestures to her sketchpad, “I didn’t always want to be an artist, it was only after I moved and ended up estranged from my childhood friends that I really started exploring that side of myself.”

Yes, that’s it, a reinvention. A rebirth, even. That’s what he needs- to break free from his past self and his past mistakes. His parents are right, he needs to change how he looks, as a way to mark this new beginning. This haircut his parents are getting him, and this new outfit, will be part of that rebirth. He’ll become a brand new person, someone who doesn’t make mistakes- who doesn’t stab his best friend in the eye.

“You’re right.” He says, his eyes wide with the realizations. “I’ve been obsessing over the past for so long, futilely hoping that things could magically return to how they used to be, but all I’ve been doing is missing the chance to make things better now .”

Mincy grins, “That’s the spirit! I know you can do it, Basil!”

He smiles a bit awkwardly, “T-Thanks, you’ve really given me a lot to think about, but I have to ask- why are you so keen on helping me?”

“Well, a while back I was stuck in a bit of a rut myself. Not as bad as yours by any means but still, I could barely even lift my pen to draw. Then I met Kel and Sunny, and they encouraged me to keep going, even though they didn’t know me. I guess it just showed me that, sometimes, a few kind words from a stranger can be exactly what a person needs to pull through in tough times.”

“Heh, sounds like Kel, always happy to talk to complete strangers.”

“Sorry for the delay, Mincy.” A boy looking about the same age as Basil and Mincy walks over to the bench. “I ran into a few friends and got held up.”

Short black hair, a black shirt and khakis, a very thoughtful look in his eyes. He looks radiant, like a star in the night sky- like he’s sparkling little flecks of light as he moves.

“O-oh, Casey, was so busy talking I didn’t even realize you were late.” Mincy chuckles.

“I see you’ve made a new friend.” He turns to Basil and smiles, a subtle but undeniably beautiful smile- a smile that conveys so much with only the smallest of movements in the face. His face reminds Basil of a painting, something so perfect that it seems hard to believe he is real. He…

He kind of looks like Sunny, now that Basil takes a closer look.

The dark hair, the thoughtful gaze which could be easily mistaken for boredom, the subtle smile.

Basil can’t help but blush under his gaze. “I-uh, well, uh i-i-it’s nice to meet you Casey.”

“This is Basil! He goes to our school.”

“Basil, huh? You’re the one that pink-haired girl likes to mess with.”

“Aubrey? Y-yeah.”

Casey puts his hand on Basil’s shoulder, who tries his best not to show how flustered he is. “I know what it’s like to be pushed around like that, maybe we can talk some time.”

“S-Sure.”

Casey backs away and turns to Mincy, “We should be going, though. We have a movie to catch, and we might be late if we stay for too long.”

Mincy stands and smiles at Basil, “We’ll see you around, Basil!”

“See ya…” He weakly waves as they leave. He wishes he could join them, if only to get away from his parents. Perhaps another day he could find some time to hang out with them- maybe, just maybe, they could be his new friends?

But, Mincy is already friends with Kel.

And her brother, he’s so beautiful… and so much like Sunny. It might be a little too much for him right now.

Someone walks over, he looks up to see his father standing in front of him.

“I didn’t want to interrupt so I waited for the conversation to be finished.” He says. “I didn’t eavesdrop, if you’re wondering.”

Basil simply nods in response.

“Who was that? A friend?”

Basil looks over as the siblings walk away and sighs. “No, just a friendly stranger.”

Chapter Text

“She must be busy.” Kel notes as he checks the time on the dashboard- 12:15. “We agreed on noon, right?”

“Yeah.” They’ve been sitting in the car for about fifteen minutes, waiting outside Aubrey’s house for her to come out. Hero would call her, but she said not to call because her mom is closer to the phone and would likely answer first. “Maybe I should knock on the door and see what’s up.”

“I got a better idea!” Kel declares just as Hero is unbuckling his seatbelt. He leans over Hero and hits the car horn. “Kel! Stop that!” Kel giggles and hits it again while Hero tries to push him away to his side of the car.

Silence passes for a few moments, then Aubrey steps out of her house in a rush, clearly annoyed. She gets in the back seat grumbling, “I was busy, you didn’t have to honk and wake my mom up.”

“Sorry about that, it was all Kel.” Hero chuckles a bit awkwardly.

“Hey! Way to throw me under the bus like that.” Aubrey kicks the back of his seat. “Ow!”

“You’ve really cleaned this whole thing up, Hero.” Aubrey says as she buckles up. “I remember it used to be a mess back when it was your mom’s car.”

“Well we don’t have so many children constantly spilling things in the back anymore.” His parents were usually the ones to drive the gang places whenever they all went somewhere together. Sunny and Mari’s parents were often too busy with work, plus neither owned a car large enough to carry six passengers, so the responsibility usually fell on his mom with her minivan- which Hero inherited when his mom bought herself a nice new car and he got a drivers’ license. She said it’d be useful for driving his friends around in college- not that he has any friends in college, this is probably the first time anyone other than Kel has been in the car with him when he’s driving.

Kel sighs wistfully, “Those were the days. Going to movies together, and the beach, and the mall.”

“We never really visited the amusement park, though.” Aubrey notes. “I can’t remember why.”

“I think it was because Sunny’s afraid of heights, and Basil had a weak stomach.” Hero says. They probably could have still gone, but Mari was always adamant about not leaving someone out when they all went somewhere together- especially when it was Sunny in question. Typical of her, always looking out for her baby brother even at the expense of her own enjoyment.

And yet he…

No. No. Now’s not the time to think about that. Today is a good day for Hero, he’s getting to spend it with his two closest friends and he won’t let it be ruined because he spent too long dwelling on that day.

He’ll save it for next time he visits Mari.

“It’s too quiet here, we should turn on some music!” Kel declares, mercifully breaking Hero from his previous line of thought. He starts digging through the arm rest compartment, “I know I left it here- aha!” His hand withdraws from it holding the CD case for a Plear album.

“I was wondering where that went.” Hero says.

Aubrey groans, “Of course you’d like their music, Kel.”

“Hey, what do you have against Plear?”

“They’re overrated as hell, that’s what.” She crosses her arms. “Mediocre at best music.”

“As if whatever you listen to is better.” Kel scoffs and folds his arms.

“You don’t even know what I listen to.”

“Well I bet it’s boring.”

Then the two get into it, bickering about this artist or that album. Hero tries to block it out as he focuses on the road, but they sure make a ruckus. Aubrey kicks Kel’s seat a few more times as they argue- probably should put a stop to this. He moves to select a station on the radio.

“Last I checked, I’m the one driving here, so I get to pick what we listen to.” A firm foot down, neither will be happy but they’ll be annoyed with him instead of each other. He flips to a station- the sound quality on the speakers is bad. “Yeesh, I forgot why I don’t use the radio very often.”

Aubrey and Kel groan in unison but accept his decree.

“Oh, Aubrey, Kel and I were talking about seeing a movie in a week or two- think you might want to see it together? Could invite all your other friends, too.”

“Sure, I’ll see when they’re all up for it.” Hero sees her smile in the rear view mirror and does likewise.

“Great!”

The three pull up at the mall and find a place to park- unfortunately the side of the parking lot they entered is full so they have to park at the far end and walk all the way to the entrance.

“I’ll race you guys there!” Kel says. Classic Kel, always the competitive type- at least nowadays he’s mature enough to take losing well. Hero is about to object when Aubrey interrupts him,

“You’re on! $10 to whoever wins.”

“I’ll abstain from this.” Hero says awkwardly, but neither seems to care as they both immediately break into a sprint. He follows after them at a brisk pace, enjoying the afternoon. Kel and Aubrey have both changed a lot over the past four years, but seeing them compete like this almost makes it feel like nothing has changed at all. Except, of course, that it’s only the three of them now. It’s an improvement over the past four years, of course, but at times like these the lack of the other three in the group was most noticeable. Once, Mari and Basil would have stayed back to chat with him while Kel and Aubrey raced forward, and Sunny would quietly accompany the three of them. Basil always had something new he wanted to share- usually something he read about in a book. Despite everything, Hero still finds himself missing those moments, when Basil seemed so happy just to have people listen to him. Will he ever be that happy again?

He reaches the entrance to find Kel and Aubrey both panting from exhaustion.

“I was pretty close, all things considered.” Aubrey says.

“Well the fact he’s got longer legs certainly gives him an advantage.” Hero says as he joins them.

“And I work out all the time!” Kel grins.

“Honestly still hard to believe how tall you’ve gotten, Kel.” Aubrey says as she pulls out her wallet and hands him the promised ten dollars. “I remember you used to be the shortest of us.”

“Now you’re the shortest.” Kel chuckles. Hero almost brings up that Basil and Sunny are shorter than Aubrey, but decides it’s not a good time to mention them.

“Bet I could still beat you in a fight.” Aubrey says as the group moves to enter the mall.

“We fought twice already.”

“First time Sunny ruined it with his knife and the second one was six against two.”

“What about after you pushed Basil?”

She rolls her eyes, “That was barely a fight, we just wrestled on the ground for a minute before Hero showed up.”

Hero sighs, “Why are you so keen on fighting?”

“Yeah.” Kel crosses his arms, “I was already sick of it after all your friends challenged me to fights in a single day.”

Aubrey chuckles a little. “That was a wild day. Hard to believe you and Sunny beat all of them with just a basketball and your bare hands.”

“It was mostly me, honestly, though Sunny certainly tried his best to help.” He gets a bit of an embarrassed look, “Especially when he stole my mom’s pepper spray and used it on you… Sorry about that, by the way.”

Again the conversation turns to Sunny, why does he feel inescapable now that he’s left town entirely? He did so much in only three days, it seems like everyone in town now has something to say about him. How nice he was, how much he helped them- they weren’t wrong or anything, Hero saw firsthand just how selfless Sunny had been. Yet, how can he square that with everything he knows now? Was Sunny’s streak of kindness just him wanting to help everyone? Did he think it was a way to atone for killing Mari?

A hand grabbing his shoulder jolts Hero back into focus.

“Get your head out of the clouds, man, you almost ran into someone.” Aubrey says.

“Sorry.”

The three take a look around the mall- it’s a decently busy day, and there are quite a few people milling around everywhere from store to store. Hopefully they can find a place to eat that isn’t too busy.

“Oh, let’s stop here first!” Kel points to the game store. “Only been in here once or twice, but they got all the newest games for every console!”

“I think you have enough games already, maybe wait for your birthday.” Hero says.

Aubrey grins and slaps him on the back, “C’mon, Hero, live a little! After all the shit we’ve had to go through, I don’t think anyone would blame us for indulging a little.”

“Yeah, besides it’s my money so I can spend it however I want.”

Hero sighs, “Alright, just try not to get anything too expensive.”

Kel rushes into the store, with Aubrey and Hero following close behind. He’s certainly right about their game selection, the place has walls covered in consoles and games for them- a few consoles are even set up so people can play them before buying, or just to distract kids for a little while. Kel and Aubrey gather to one side, browsing the game titles and discussing their merits.

“Magic City, maybe?” Kel grabs it and looks at the cover.

Aubrey shrugs a little. “Eh, the next one’s coming out in a few months, I’d wait for that.”

Hero glances over Kel’s shoulder at the game, noting the woman in a bikini on the cover and the M rating. “That seems a little too mature for you guys.”

“Psh, you just say that because you can’t handle video game violence.” Kel says. “Most people our age are playing this, anyways.”

“Maybe you could get something with co-op?” Aubrey says as she runs a finger along the displayed games. “Last time we played games at your place we were stuck taking turns on the console.”

“Well then we’d need to buy a new controller, too. We used to have two but one broke.”

Hero chuckles, “Isn’t that the one you accidentally crushed when you slipped and sat on it?”

Kel’s face goes a bit red, “Yeah, that’s the one. Was really hoping you wouldn’t mention that part.”

They spend a while browsing the games before Kel finally grabs one with some curiosity- it’s an older game, but their current console should be able to play it. Hero grabs the game and inspects it curiously.

“Intruder: The Twin Snakes? I think I’ve heard some classmates in college talk about it. Looks interesting.”

“I see they also have the second one.” Aubrey says, pointing at a game. “Sons of Liberty?”

“I’ll get both!” Kel declares as he grabs the second game.

“Kel that doesn’t seem like-” Hero starts but his brother doesn’t stick around long enough for him to finish as he immediately rushes to the counter to buy them. “Nevermind.”

Aubrey laughs loudly, drawing some eyes to the two. “He’s such an impulse buyer, I swear.”

“I remember when he used to buy action figures with his measly allowance whenever possible- no matter how many he had he always found another he wanted more.” Hero shakes his head. “Some things never change.”

“You mind if I stop somewhere, too?”

“Of course , Aubrey. You don’t even need to ask.”

Once Kel’s purchase has been made the three head out and continue exploring the mall. After a while of wandering, Aubrey points to a beauty store.

“I think we’ll sit this out.” Kel says. “I’d feel weird hanging out in a store like that.”

“How about we check out the As Seen on TV store?”

“Aw hell yeah!”

Perhaps it would have been better to go here with some of her other friends. As Aubrey looks through the store at all the high-end beauty products, it becomes clear that having a friend or two there to talk with about it would be better. Kim would probably have some good advice- despite her generally boyish appearance, she seems to know a lot about makeup products. Instead she had to come here with Kel and Hero, probably two of the least knowledgeable people she knows. Even the Maverick probably knows more about makeup considering how vain and insecure he is about his appearance.

Still, might as well look for some stuff now while she’s here- perhaps some nicer hair dye? She’s used the same cheap pink for a while, maybe some experimenting with new colors would be nice, like when she used to dye her hair blonde. She looks through the different brands and colors curiously. Purple, perhaps? No, purple was always Mari’s color, she doesn’t need another thing to remind her of Mari every morning. Maybe red? Red hair is pretty attractive, after all. Could even get some green contacts to go with them. Suddenly, she feels a shoulder brush against hers, snapping her from her reverie.

“Oh, sorry. Didn’t mean to bump into you.” Says the other person as Aubrey turns to get a look at them. A lithe woman, somewhere in her late forties by Aubrey’s estimate- her lightly wrinkled face is wreathed by golden blonde hair which falls down her shoulders and back, and her eyes shine a brilliant bright blue. Her dress is a pleasant shade of green, with shoulders bare, and a bracelet of yellow flowers wraps around her left wrist. She’s quite beautiful for her age, but there’s something unnervingly familiar about her face.

“It’s on me, I wasn’t paying attention.” Where has she seen this woman before? She looks so familiar and yet unfamiliar at the same time. The woman moves with a measured elegance as she reaches up for some blonde hair dye- likely to cover up some early graying. “I’m sorry if this is awkward, but have we met before?”

The woman smiles pleasantly, “Oh, I don’t think so! I don’t really live around here, I’m just visiting for the week. I’m Amanda, by the way, you?”

Aubrey nods in understanding- still, she can’t shake the feeling of familiarity. Perhaps she knows a relative? “Name’s Aubrey. If you don’t mind me asking, what brings you to a place like Faraway Town? Not much interesting or unique going on here.”

Amanda hesitates for a moment, “My mother passed away recently… well, a month ago, actually. I wish we had come sooner, but my husband had work and kept coming up with excuses.” She sighs then seems to straighten up a little, “I’m sorry, I really shouldn’t be getting into this with a complete stranger- especially a child. I should really get going, my husband and son are doubtless growing impatient.”

Aubrey smiles slightly, “Yeah I probably shouldn’t keep my friends waiting, either.”

As Amanda turns to leave she says, “Maybe if we run into each other again I could introduce you to my son. He’s about your age, and I think he could really use a new friend right now.”

“What’s his name?”

“Basil.” The name hits Aubrey like a bat to the face, and suddenly everything falls into place- of course she’s seen that face before, she’s been to Basil’s house and seen all the photos of his parents. Why didn’t she see it sooner? Especially once she started talking about her mother - Basil’s grandmother - passing away a month ago. She takes a box of red hair dye and quickly buys it before leaving. She looks around the mall and sees Amanda departing, and sure enough Basil is following close behind her.

They look so normal. Like any happy family she’s seen in the neighborhood.

“Yo, look at this.” Kel holds up a box, “It’s for steaming eggs.”

Hero looks at it closely at the box. It doesn’t look very special, yet the people advertising it no doubt claim it’s some kind of revolutionary new invention, “I don’t think you need a specialized tool like that just to steam eggs.”

“But it makes the work easier!”

“I doubt it.”

“Fine.” He puts it away and keeps browsing. “What about this?” He points to a device that compresses clothes into a smaller space with a vacuum to make packing easier.

“I don’t think we’re ever going to need that.” Hero chuckles. Kel always seems to have had an odd love of these kinds of niche or borderline useless products they advertise on TV. Something about the novelty, perhaps. He certainly doesn’t really think about the function all that much, just the fact that it’s strange and new.

“I hope I didn’t keep you guys waiting.” Hero turns to see Aubrey behind them. “I just had the strangest encounter.”

“Yeah?” Kel asks as he curiously looks over another useless product.

“I ran into Basil’s mom.”

“Really?”

“What was she like?” Kel asks eagerly.

Aubrey thinks for a moment, “She was… shockingly normal? I was expecting his parents to be cruel and uncaring with how absent they usually are, but she seems like an all-around nice person.”

That is strange. Considering how inattentive Basil’s parents have always been, and how on edge he seems to be because of them, Hero expected something more. Although, there’s still no accounting for his father.

“Does that mean Basil is here?” Hero asks.

“Yeah, I saw him as I was leaving the store, though he was walking away and didn’t notice me.”

“Who knows,” Kel says, “maybe we’ll run into him later, too.”

“Maybe…” Aubrey says- it’s not something she’s looking forward to, all things considered. Better to keep Basil at arm’s length for now, until she’s ready to talk to him again- if she ever is ready at all.

Chapter Text

The family passes through a few more stores on the way to through the mall- most of this passing by Basil unremarked and unremembered. Was going to the mall always this boring? No, it’s his parents that are boring. They rarely have anything interesting to talk about, and they likely have no interest in anything he might want to talk about. They prattle on and on about work, about adult gossip, about future plans that likely don’t involve him at all. Why should he care at all what they have to say?

Suddenly, his mother stops and points at something, “ There’s the bookstore.” She says as though she was continuing a conversation topic.

“It’s close to the hair salon, I see.” His father adds before turning to Basil. “We can stop there first if you want.”

He remembered that? Even Basil had almost forgotten his earlier request in the mental malaise which has only just been lifted. “Y-Yeah, I’d like that.”

Without another word the three enter into the bookstore- it’s a modest place, not as small and cozy as local family owned bookstores but not as expansive as the large corporate bookstores he’s sometimes visited. At the front, no surprise, are new releases and best sellers, situated close to both the entrance and the registers so most might find the main book they’re looking for quickly and easily. Might as well start there. He begins browsing the stands, noting titles and reading the back of each for a synopsis.

He picks up one and glances over it; it's a thriller about two young serial killers terrorizing a small suburban town, and their friends’ attempts to uncover the truth that’s right under their noses. From the reviews on the back it seems like it’s a tragic fall to evil type story, and one apparently so well-written it leaves you rooting for the people who murder their neighbors for the thrill of killing.

“Oh, I already have that!” His mother says as she watches him examine the book. “It’s really good, although I find the gay romance to be a little much. You could borrow my copy if you want.”

Basil puts the book away, “It doesn’t really sound like my thing, too gruesome.” He keeps looking through the novels, examining those that stick out to him. A time travel heist about a group from across many timelines trying to fix their mistakes- the mechanics of the story seem a bit too complicated for his tastes. A supernatural drama about a boy who can see exactly when people are destined to die, and his attempts to save a friend from his fated doom. Interesting, but something about how the protagonist and his doomed friend are described feels uncomfortably familiar.

“So what kind of book are you looking for?” His mother asks.

“Something light, I think.” He says as his eyes dart from cover-to-cover.

“Do you still read those books on flowers often?”

“A little- although when you’ve already memorized most of it, it isn’t as fun to reread.”

 Finally he stops on one that really catches his eye- A lighthearted story about a girl, long dead under unusual circumstances, suddenly returning to life through equally unusual means, and how she reacts to how the world and her friends have changed in the years since her passing.

“This looks nice.” He pulls it out and turns to notice that his father walked away at some point while he was distracted. “Where did he…”

“Oh, your father went to look at the DVDs here.” His mother says. “Looking for a movie we can watch later this week.”

“Like… like a family movie night?”

“Of course! There’s a lot we haven’t been able to do as a family, and I thought it’d be fun to take the time now that we’ll be staying a while.” His mother smiles. “Maybe we can pick something out together.”

“I guess.” Part of him dreads the idea, but another part yearns for the chance to potentially bridge the gap between him and his parents. Maybe this is exactly what they need, some proper bonding time- no funeral concerns, no friends showing up, no uncomfortable questions, just them relaxing like a family for once in his life. He follows his mother and the two soon join his father looking through a rather meager selection of DVDs. His father is already looking through it when the other two join in.

“How about this?” His mother points to a Sweetheart film, rated PG. Doesn’t seem like something his father would like, being some kind of romance show starring some princess. Wait, didn’t Mari really love Sweetheart? Yes, she definitely had some Sweetheart merchandise when they were young. Did Sunny’s mom keep any of that stuff, or was it all sold? He probably wouldn’t have sold it, but then he’s notoriously sentimental- he can’t let go of a memento, even years later.

Even if remembering hurts.

“Maybe this would be better.” His father’s words break him from his brooding and he turns to look at the DVD case he holds up- Paper Trail , rated R.

“ That? ” His mother asks in surprise. “That seems far too dark for Basil.”

“Oh, come now, he’s almost an adult. I saw stuff like Night of the Flesh Eaters when I was much younger than him.” He looks to Basil, “You’ll be fine, won’t you?”

No. He won’t ever be fine. He can’t even hold a knife without shaking in fear- how could he handle a mature movie? That’s what he wants to say, at least, but instead he simply nods and says, “I guess.”

His father makes an expression that almost looks like a smile, “Then it’s decided.” Why did he have to say it like that? He makes it sound like the decision is something of grave importance for them. After a short wait in line they purchase the book and movie and head off to finally deal with the main reason they chose to come here in the first place. The hair salon- practically right next door to the bookstore, conveniently. It seems oddly empty, and in only a couple minutes he’s put the flower hairpin in his pocket and is sitting in the spinning chairs they used to give people haircuts on. What are they called? Is there a special name for them? Doesn’t matter, the hairdresser comes up and asks his parents what type of haircut they’re looking for today. He goes into great detail over exactly what Basil’s hair should look like- he’s clearly put a lot of thought into it.

“Hold still.” The hairdresser says as she puts the protective cape over his shoulders and affixes it to the back. “So how old are you?”

Of course, small talk, hairdressers always love to do this kind of stuff. Probably makes things less awkward to them, but for him it only makes it even more awkward. “Uh, 16.”

“My son’s 16, too.” Water splashes over his head as she sprays his hair to make it easier to work with. “He’s on his school’s basketball team. Do you play any sports?”

“Not really-” A blade appears out of the corner of his eye. No, two, it’s a pair of scissors. Yes, that’s normal, that’s what you use to cut hair. Why is he surprised by this? This isn’t the first time he’s been around scissors, either, his heart shouldn’t be racing this much. This is just like the garden shears he’s worked with practically all his life. The garden shears he’s always been so deft and precise with, which he almost never cut himself with.

The garden shears he almost murdered Sunny with.

The garden shears he almost turned on himself.

But it’s fine, thankfully the fact his hair is already wet means the hairdresser doesn’t notice the sweat. She combs and snips his hair and asks him a variety of inane questions, most of which he answers with simple nods and grunts. She makes him look up, and he stares directly into the mirror in front of him- nothing is there, thankfully, other than himself and the hairdresser. And the repeated reflections of them in the mirror on the other side of the room. Like a glimpse into other worlds, he sees himself reflected back infinitely, some facing towards him and some with their backs to him.

Perhaps in one of those worlds, there’s a version of him who didn’t make his mistakes. Perhaps one is still happy.

Why couldn’t that be him? Why does he have to be the one who did everything wrong?

“Are you okay?” The hairdresser asks. “You’re shaking a bit.”

“S-Sorry. I’m just a little nervous, I guess.”

“So what occasion is this for? Going on a date?”

“No… Funeral.”

“Oh, my condolences then.” She moves in front of Basil and begins the work of trimming his bangs. He can see the knife so clearly now as she snips across his forehead. Just one slip and she could cut his face, or she could even trip and ram it into his eye like he did with Sunny. He would deserve that much at least.

Snip. Snip. Snip.

She keeps going, unheeding of him. She’s a professional, of course, and professionals don’t slip up and stab their customers. He glances down, so much hair already draping his shoulders and falling to the floor in wet golden clumps. Everyone always said he has beautiful hair- perfect, even. Aubrey especially went on about how his hair seemed to look good without any effort on his part, compared to her constantly tangled and knotted black hair.

And now it’s all scattered on the ground around him, like a tree shedding beautiful red and orange leaves in the fall.

Well, it’s not like he’s going bald completely. He’ll still have hair, he needs to stop overreacting like this is the end of the world. It’s just a little change in style, a new look for a new Basil. It’s like Mincy said, he needs a makeover.

The hairdresser suddenly calls over his parents and he realizes that her work is done. “How does this look?” The question is more for his parents than Basil himself. He looks in the mirror again. His hair is shorter than he’s ever seen it cut, with the front parted cleanly a bit off-center. His ears are now entirely uncovered, too, where once he kept them partially hidden behind his hair. It looks very formal and professional, like he’s getting ready for a job interview.

The three others gather around him, examining the hairdresser’s work closely.

“Looks better already.” His father nods approvingly.

“You almost look like your grandfather like that.” His mother walks around him to get a full look at his hair, smiling softly as she looks at his face in the mirror.

“You look just like Sunny…” Something adds as it hangs over his shoulder. It’s right, the hairstyle is eerily similar to Sunny’s. “Why do you keep running? You should know you can’t outrun guilt.”

He gulps, but says nothing.

“How do you feel?” His father asks.

“Great.” He fakes a smile to emphasize the point. “I feel like a new man, to be honest.”

“That doesn’t change what you did.” Something says. “Nothing will.”

Please be quiet, just this once. Basil looks away from Something and once more sees the infinite reflections- infinite worlds. So many versions of him and his parents, receding until they were too small to see. As before, some face towards him and some look away.

And all the different Somethings stare directly at him.

“You can’t escape.” They all speak in the same voice. In Mari’s voice. Basil’s stomach turns inside out- memories of that day flood his mind as the ghost which is not real and yet has always been behind him watches on. “You will die as you lived. Alone. Cowering. Weeping. Ashamed.”

He gets up as fast as he can but immediately stumbles, a hand catches him before he can fall.

“Are you alright?” His mother holds him by the shoulder.

“Y-Yeah, just feeling a little lightheaded all of a sudden. Heh. I think I just need to use the bathroom.” He steadies himself and pulls away from his mother. Before she can respond he’s already off to the bathroom- there’s little privacy there compared to the bathroom at home, but it’ll still give him a place to recollect himself away from his parents. At least, as long as his father doesn’t also decide to use the bathroom at this moment. He enters a stall, locks the door behind him, and sits down on the toilet.

He breathes in deeply and sighs. “Everything is going to be okay. Once we get through the funeral, everything will be okay.” It has to be. His parents will see how dutiful and loyal he is as a son and decide to stay with him- or maybe they take him along with them, so he can finally leave Faraway Town as Sunny did.

“That will never work.” The same Stranger from yesterday speaks, its voice low and quiet. “If you do nothing now, it will simply follow you.”

“You can never escape it.” Something whispers in his ear sweetly. “The guilt, the pain, the regret. Nothing you do will ever rid you of this feeling.” But he needs to get out of here, away from the judgment of the others. He needs a new start.

“Stop running.” The Stranger sounds exasperated. “Is that all you can do now? Run and hide from all your problems?”

Maybe it is all he can do, simply run and hope his problems don’t catch up. “What else can I do?” He didn’t intend to speak out loud- hopefully nobody else is in the bathroom right now.

“Give up.” Something’s words are laced with warmth, in that loving voice Mari always used when she was comforting someone who was afraid. “Embrace your end, Basil. It will not change no matter what you do.”

“No.” The Stranger says. “Remember your promises.” Yes, the promises. The promises he made to Sunny and Mari. To keep going, to make new memories, to live for their sake.

“They mean nothing.” Something says.

“They mean everything.” The Stranger replies.

God, having one voice in his ear was bad enough, but two arguing with each other is almost as annoying as it is debilitating. He rubs his eyes, knowing he won’t get the moment of quiet he’d hoped for, and leaves the stall. He washes his hands, trying his best not to look at the mirror in front of him. Something is there, of course, but knowing it’s there and seeing it are two different things entirely. But suddenly, there’s a presence behind him, moving to his side and reaching for the sink. He looks up into the mirror- Something looms large behind him, but to his right another person has started washing their hands.

Basil almost jumps out of his skin. “K-Kel?!”

Kel looks up in surprise. “Basil? I almost didn’t recognize you, heh. You got a haircut?”

“Yeah, thought it was time for a new look.” Something and Kel both stare at him intently in the mirror- both equally inscrutable to him at this moment. “And, besides, need to look more professional for the funeral tomorrow.”

“Whose funeral?” Really? Kel has always been a forgetful one, but could he really so easily forget something so important?

“My… grandma’s? Don’t you remember?”

“Yeah, but… didn’t she die like a month ago? I thought the funeral would have already happened.” He’s right, it absolutely should have. Guess he can’t be blamed for not realizing that Basil’s parents would delay it for so long.

“Had some… complications.”

Kel smiles, “Well, hopefully you’ll get a little closure so you can go back to your normal life again.”

“His smiles are as fake as yours.” Something whispers into Basil’s ear. “You’ve hurt him in ways that will never heal. He loved her, and you killed her.”

“I hope so. I’d like to put all this behind me and move on, but it’s hard with this funeral hanging over my head.” Looking back in the mirror, he realizes he still hasn’t put the flower hairpin back on; he quickly retrieves it from his pocket and affixes it above his left ear as always. It doesn’t serve any practical purpose anymore, but it feels good to wear.

Kel nods, “Now that’s the Basil I know. I can’t imagine you without that little hairpin honestly.”

“The Basil he knows is a killer, and a liar.”

His heart pounds in his chest and his hands shake as he reaches for the paper towels. “I-I’m sorry, I really need to go.”

“It’s good to see you out and about, at least. You’ve barely left the house this past month.”

He leaves without another word, passing by Aubrey and Hero outside the bathroom on his way out. They both look surprised, both at the fact they ran into him and his new appearance.

“Wait, Basil? What are you-” He ignores Aubrey and keeps walking, not even turning to look at them. “Basil!”

“Always running away.” The Stranger says. “What will you do when you have nowhere left to run?”

“Whither and die.” Something replies for him.

He rejoins his parents, who are waiting not too far from the bathroom. “Can we go home now?”

The car ride home is quiet and uneventful- not much to talk about, and a lot on Basil’s mind to preoccupy him. Something’s voice still follows him, occasionally whispering into his ear its sweet-sounding venom. Its painful lies and more painful truths. When they get home, Basil immediately changes his shirt and settles into his bedroom with the door locked.

The rest of the day goes by in a blur. He eats lunch in his room, and once dinner comes around he eats in complete silence. Nobody talks to him the entire time- even Something and The Stranger quiet down eventually, seemingly having made their points. At least now he has some peace and quiet.

“I just need to get through tomorrow and everything will be okay.” Like Kel said, he just needs to find some closure to all this. The funeral will be the end of one stage of life, and the beginning of another- time for him to finally grow up.

Until then, he just needs to distract his mind for the night.

He grabs the book his parents got him today and starts reading through it in bed. It’s exactly what he needs at this moment, something lighthearted and fun. A story where nobody has to die- even those who die come back. There’s difficulty, emotional turmoil, arguments, but in the end everyone lives happily in the end. A story that could only exist in fiction. He yawns and checks the clock- 10:43 PM, he oughta head to bed now. He washes up, ignoring Something watching in the bathroom mirror, and quickly climbs into his familiarly comfortable bed. Tomorrow the funeral- the end, and the beginning. Wherever grandma is, hopefully she’s watching over him right now. Once she’s finally resting in peace, maybe he’ll be able to find some peace, too.

Chapter Text

“No, you got it all wrong!” Aubrey says a bit defensively, “The nails were Kim’s idea, not mine.”

“Huh, really?” Kel sits back in the restaurant seat and puts his hands behind his head. His legs almost hit Aubrey on the other side of the booth, and she occasionally gives him a light kick to move his feet aside. The table isn’t small by any means, he’s just gifted with long legs. Beside him, though, Hero seems to have a much easier time keeping his legs on their side of the table.

“She said it made me look cool.”

“If you don’t want people to think you’re a bully, maybe don’t carry around a deadly weapon.” For someone as clever as Aubrey, she sometimes seems to struggle with introspection on her own actions. It can be pretty grating sometimes, how she stubbornly refuses to see her own mistakes.

Her face reddens up. “I never hit anyone with it!”

Hero sighs, setting down the sub sandwich he’s been eating- a sub sandwich, as usual, with all the lettuce and tomato on so that it looks like a salad on a bun. “Kel’s still right, even if you didn’t use it, just carrying it around is enough of a threat to put you in a bad light.”

Kel smiles, but then Hero continues. “And Kel, don’t press the matter too much. Aubrey already knows it’s wrong.” Of course, Hero always manages to find a position that leaves neither of them happy.

“You’re right, I was just curious about why. I mean, do nails actually make a bat any deadlier?”

Aubrey shrugs. “Probably not. Like I said, Kim just thought it looked cool.” She pauses for a moment to take a long sip from her soda before continuing. “Hard to believe I couldn’t see how she felt about me until she said it directly to my face.”

“If you don’t mind me asking, Aubrey,” Hero begins carefully. “When, uh, when did you figure out you were interested in women like that?”

“Why do you want to know?”

Hero scratches the back of his head nervously. “Well, we’ve missed out on a lot of milestones in each others’ lives these past few years, and you never really formally came out.”

“For the record, it was about three years ago. Kim was the first I talked about it with, later that fall.” Aubrey brushes a hair out of her face. “You know, everyone always thinks Kim only follows me around because she likes how strong and mean I can be- but that day was really what cemented the bond between us. It was the first time I saw past her outward bravado.”

Hero smiles. “You know, I was a bit reluctant at first when I heard about your little gang, but I’m glad to see you had such good friends taking care of you all these years.”

“Even if they are a bunch of dweebs.”

“ You’re a dweeb!” Aubrey shoots back.

He sticks out his tongue.

“Anyways.” Hero butts in before the two can continue this argument. “How’s Kim doing, anyways?”

“Fine. Vance is getting a summer job on their mom’s insistence so she’s a bit lonely. Weird seeing them apart like that, honestly.”

“Ya. Even when we were kids I remember Vance always seemed to follow Kim around and act as her bodyguard.” Kel takes a bite of his burger, prepared just as he always likes it- without vegetables and covered in ketchup. He never understands why people like Hero love covering their burgers with greens like lettuce, tomatoes, and pickles. The meat is what he wants, why drown out the taste of it with bland vegetables, or worse, pickles? “You know… I always thought… that was a bit weird… seeing as Vance is the older one.”

“Kel, don’t talk with food in your mouth.”

“At first I thought it was odd, too.” Aubrey says. “Knowing them better, I think it’s just his way to look out for her.”

Hero shrugs, “I guess that makes some sense, though I can’t imagine blindly following everything Kel tells me to do.”

“That’d be the day.” Kel chuckles. Oh, the things he’d do with Hero following his every command- no more chores, no more homework. He could just play sports and watch TV all day long. And none of Aubrey’s friends would dare challenge him to a rematch with Hero always around.

“Kel, are you imagining what it’d be like to boss me around?” Hero glances at him with a knowing look.

“ Maybe. ”

Hero chuckles. Soon, the three have finished their lunches and set off again into the mall. Activity seems to have thinned a bit since they got here, but there’s still a decent crowd around. Without a word, the three slowly make their way back to the entrance they had come in from- Aubrey and Hero thankfully remembering the way much better than Kel ever could.

“Anything else you two want to do before we go?” Hero asks.

“I gotta use the bathroom real quick.” Before the other two respond, Kel hurries into the bathroom.

“What’s taking him so long?” Aubrey groans. It’s just like Kel, one minute he rushes them along and the next he keeps everyone waiting. “He better not be shitting in there.”

“It’s only been a few minutes.” Hero stuffs his hands into his pockets. “He usually isn’t one to, uh, do that in a public bathroom.”

Aubrey giggles- Hero seems to be uncomfortable even thinking about Kel doing stuff like shitting. Sometimes she wants to press that awkwardness further by bringing up other subjects, but it seems a little mean to pressure Hero like that; if it were Kel, it’d be a much different story.

Suddenly, someone steps out of the men’s bathroom in a clear rush. His hair is strangely cut, but his hair pin and clothes make it obvious that it’s Basil. Why does he look so strange, though? He’s never cut his hair like this before, in his entire life.

“Wait, Basil? What are you-” He keeps walking, not even stopping to look at her as she addresses him. He’s never done that , either. No matter how hard he tried, he could never ignore her remarks in the past, whether at school or in the park. “Basil!” Still he ignores her and keeps walking, joining with the woman Aubrey had met a few hours ago and a dark-haired man with a very stern, professional look.

“His parents?” Hero says as they watch the three depart.

“Well clearly. ” She crosses her arms and scoffs. Something about seeing Basil with his new haircut, and his parents, rubs her the wrong way. What is he trying to do giving himself that dumb new haircut? Impress his parents? Reinvent himself? As if he can escape what he’s done by simply cutting his hair short.

“Guys, did you just see Basil?” Kel says from behind, his exit from the bathroom going entirely unnoticed.

“Of course we did. We have eyes, you know.”

The brothers both give a bit of a concerned look but say nothing. They can probably tell that seeing Basil like… that , has soured her mood somewhat. “His hair looks like Sunny’s now.”

“Yeah, now that you mention it…” Kel mutters. “He said something about his grandmother’s funeral but, like, she died last month- shouldn’t the funeral have already happened?”

“Yeah.” Hero scratches his chin. “I think it’s normally a week or two?”

Aubrey turns away. “C’mon, let’s just head home.”

The ride home is a lot more quiet than the ride to the mall. Hero doesn’t bother with the radio, and Kel seems to be thinking something over- probably Basil, if Aubrey has to guess. It’s strange, Basil only got a haircut and yet it feels like there’s been a major shift in him. She’s known him for almost a decade now, and that style he had before almost defines his appearance in her mind- without it, he looks like a completely different person. But maybe she’s overthinking it. Maybe it’s just his parents making him look more professional for the funeral.

When they reach her house, Hero suddenly breaks the silence. “Any plans for tomorrow, Aubrey?”

She gives a noncommittal shrug, “Probably just hang out with Kim and the others, if they’re free.”

“Cris wants to hang out tomorrow, so I’ll probably be busy,” Kel says. That blue-haired girl? Despite living so close, Aubrey has never really talked to her. She’s an excellent swimmer, according to others at school, but other than that she’s a bit of an unknown. Her blue hair is pretty cute, at least. Is there a thing between her and Kel? Probably best not to ask right now.

“Thanks for this, guys.” She gets out of the car as the brothers eagerly thank her for joining. They’ve changed a lot, the three of them, but at least they’re back together again. Half the old friend group is better than none…

The house is still a mess, as usual. Her mom is still on the couch, as usual. It’s like time hasn’t moved at all in this house since she left. Hasn’t moved in years, really. It’ll never change- She will never change. The two ignore each other as Aubrey goes back to her room and turns on the TV. Her eyes, however, drift to the corkboard by her bed, where the photos of Mari had been kept safe for so long. Now she has nothing left of her.

They told her it was the right thing to do, Sunny and Hero and Kel. They told her that Basil deserved to have those photos back- but they were wrong. Basil lied. Sunny lied. They killed her and they lied about it and now she doesn’t even have anything left to remember her by. Maybe she should take the photo album back, and give Basil the comeuppance he’s been long overdue. Kim could probably help, and Kel and Hero certainly wouldn’t try to stop her this time. It would be so easy and yet… she knows she can’t do it, no matter how much part of her wishes she could. Besides, Sunny probably is the one with the photo album now, at least if Kel is to be believed. All gone, spirited away with Sunny when he wrecked their lives and abandoned them for a second time. To think she ever loved a spineless coward like him. He kills his own sister and doesn’t even have the guts to admit it until he’s able to leave town and likely never return.

Never to face the consequences of his actions.

Oh, Kel might argue that he’s been suffering these past four years, but if he was suffering so much why didn’t he come out about it sooner? Why did he lie? Why did he hide? And why did Basil help him get away with it?

Click.

The TV turns off.

The lights are off, too.

The AC has gone silent.

What just happened? Was there a power outage?

She goes back down to the living room- everything is off there, too. Mom lets out a long groan. “Fuck. We paid the electric bill, didn’t we?”

“Why would I know? It’s your job to pay the bills.” She digs through a pile of envelopes on the “dinner table”, really just a small rickety wooden table neither ever eats at. No bill payment. “Clearly you forgot.”

“ You should have reminded me!” She gets up and locks eyes with Aubrey.

“Why is this my fault?” Aubrey clenches a fist. “You’ve been paying the bills in this house for years , how could you forget?”

“Don’t talk back to me , young lady!” Her mom glares at her furiously. “This is still my house, don’t forget!”

“Fuck you!”

Her mom seems likely to explode in rage, but just as quickly as her anger rises it seems to die down. She sighs. “It’s fine. It’s fine. We can always just pay late. Just give me some time to get the money together.”

“And until then, what? We just gotta go without power?”

“I guess…” Mom sighs and slouches back on the couch, looking defeated. “I really fucked up, didn’t I?”

“Tch, you think? ”

“I’m sorry for yelling, Aubs.” She looks down at the floor. As always, her mood shifts quickly in the span of a single conversation- even before Aubrey’s dad left, her mom had a habit of rapidly swinging from one emotional extreme to another. “You’re right, it’s my fault.”

Aubrey sighs. The only thing worse than mom’s anger is her self-flagellating shame. Sometimes it feels like she does this on purpose, to fish for sympathy immediately after yelling at her- but Aubrey knows it’s authentic, she’s not cunning enough, or good enough at faking her emotions, to perform that kind of trick. No, this is something worse; the hollow self-pity of someone who hates themselves, but doesn’t have the will to change for the better. Aubrey tries to think of something to say that might comfort her a little, but it would be futile.

“I think I’ll go to the park.”

As she steps out the door she briefly hears her mom shift on the couch.

“Wait-”

The words are cut off by the closing of the door.

“Aubrey seemed a bit upset there, don’t you think?” Kel says as he gets out of the car. “Maybe seeing Basil got her in a bad mood.”

“Well, you know how she can be sometimes.” He sighs, “She was already so angry these past four years.” Sometimes he still has trouble accepting that that angry girl is the same bright-eyed kid he remembers from only four years ago- but, looking back, the signs were always there. She was always headstrong, stubborn, and quick to anger, especially when Kel was involved. Things could have gone differently, though, if Mari had lived. Or if he had been there for her when she needed him.

It’ll be different this time, though, he’ll be sure of it.

“Can’t really blame her now since, well, you know.” The two enter the house to find Mom on the couch, swaddling Sally in her arms as she watches TV.

“We’re home!” Hero announces.

“How was it, dear?”

“We had a good time.” He and Kel don’t mention all the video games Kel got, better that Mom doesn’t know how much he had spent. The two brothers quickly retreat into their room, moving to their halves and getting to their own affairs. Kel lays down in bed and starts reading a comic, as he’s always done. Hero sits at his work desk and pulls out a sheet from a stack- a job application. If he’s going to be staying home for the summer, he might as well get a part-time job. Othermart always needs new grocers this time of year, and if not them the guy at Fix-It always seems like he could use some help keeping the place in order. Filling in a job application is almost second nature to him, so often has he practiced in his spare time previously. Kel used to joke that he’s done it so often he could make a career out of just writing job applications.

“Hey, Hero.” Kel says after a while. “How are you feeling about, er, the whole Basil situation?”

Hero sits in silence for a moment. ‘The Basil situation,’ everyone always came up with their own euphemisms for what’s happened. The incident, the truth, the ‘situation’ with Basil and Sunny. None of these could ever really capture the true scope of it- they all lived a lie for four years. A lie born of two kids terrified of the consequences of their actions. How could something like that ever be truly encapsulated with simple euphemism like ‘the Basil situation’?

“Why do you ask?” Hero sets down the pencil and turns in his seat. Kel reclines on his side, glancing at him with a look of curiosity and concern. He gives his best attempt at a shrug.

“I don’t know… I mean it’s been a lot to deal with…” The two brothers exchange a look for a moment. Kel tries to look relaxed, but Hero can see the uncertainty in his eyes- it almost hurts to see it in his little brother. “Basil… I didn’t think there was anything weird about him when I saw him, but now…”

“Something’s wrong, yeah.” Hero runs a hand through his hair. “Probably just that funeral getting to him. He seemed pretty on edge when I ran into him yesterday.”

Kel sighs, he clearly isn’t happy with that explanation, and Hero doesn’t blame him. His anxiety meeting Hero, his haircut, his avoidance of them, there’s something more going on. And it likely has something to do with Mari. The brothers sit in silence for a while, Kel rolls onto his back again and stares at the ceiling, Hero turning back to the application.

“You still haven’t answered my question.” Kel sounds quite impatient.

“How do you feel about it, Kel?”

He waits, Kel stays quiet. He looks back, Kel’s still staring at the ceiling contemplatively. “I… don’t know how to feel.” He sits up in his bed, his shoulders drooping a little. “I still don’t understand why they did it.”

“I don’t think we ever will.” This wasn’t the first time they’ve had an exchange like this since that day. Kel asks the same question from time-to-time, and Hero always gives the same answer- likely nobody could ever truly understand what happened that day, not even Sunny and Basil themselves. Kel looks at him, his eyes conflicted, lost, confused, but most of all desperate. Desperate for someone to come and give him the answers he’s seeking.

“To be honest, I want to forgive them.” Kel sighs. “Even after the lies and pain, looking back on those last three days with Sunny… I still want to be friends with him. And Basil. Aubrey would probably call me stupid for thinking that.”

“She… probably would, yeah.” He grimaces, it’s tough to admit but he knows in his heart that she’d be snide and sarcastic about it at best, and incensed at worst.

Kel hesitates for a moment, “Do you think I’m stupid for it?”

Hero sighs, so that’s what this is about. He wants someone… No, he wants Hero to validate his beliefs and put his doubts to rest. “No, Kel, you’re not stupid.” He gets up and moves over to Kel’s side of the room. “Look, I get it. Sunny and Basil were some of our best friends. Sunny was… almost a brother, even. I don’t blame you for still caring about them despite everything that’s happened.”

Kel looks down at the floor and sighs, “It’s strange, you know. I’ve made all sorts of new friends at school these past four years. Heh, I’m actually pretty popular, even… Yet, I only ever really think about them, as if their friendship is more important.”

“Then why did you ignore Basil for four years?” Hero might have asked this question in a different time, but now wasn’t an appropriate moment to question his brother like that. Another time, perhaps, for now he just needs support. He takes a seat on Kel’s bed beside him and pats him on the back.

“If you want to forgive them, that’s your choice. You don’t need my or Aubrey’s approval for it.”

Kel looks up at him, “But would you forgive them? I… I don’t want to do it alone.”

He hesitates- could he ever forgive them? Mari, she was the center of his entire world. He would have done anything for her, and they had made him feel like her death was somehow his fault, because they couldn’t accept the truth of what happened. Mari would probably want him to forgive, and to keep looking after them for her sake but… is he strong enough to do that? He pulls Kel into a hug, his brother accepting the embrace immediately and resting his head on his shoulder.

“I’ll support whatever you do, Kel. I promise.”

Chapter Text

Everyone gathers around Sunny as Mari brings out his present- the only present he’ll get this year, from all of them. They all gather in the living room of Sunny’s house, though emptier with the couch having been moved to make room for the Christmas tree. Despite the many lights, the room looks to be bathed in darkness, yet none of his friends notice it at all. He looks over at them, but their faces are obscured and almost unrecognizable. They’re talking, but Basil can’t seem to understand what they’re saying. He simply stares at the box, the instrument case cloaked in wrapping paper, as if that could somehow conceal what’s inside. As if its true nature could ever be hidden. And yet, he hadn’t seen its true nature then, what it will do to Sunny, to all of them. How it will destroy everything they care about.

“No.” Basil says, but nobody hears him.

Sunny unwraps the present and reveals the violin case, opening it with the look of innocent awe he often has in place of a smile. Hero puts a reassuring hand on Basil’s shoulder to keep him steady. Kel throws out his arms as if to say ‘ta-da!’ but no words come out. Everyone seems so happy but Basil simply watches in frozen horror as the violin is pulled from its case.

“Please don’t!” He calls out, but his voice emerges as a strangled whisper. “It was a mistake!”

The others keep talking incomprehensibly, Sunny looks over them all before his eyes come to rest on Basil. Those kind, sweet eyes, filled with love and gratitude for the gift so lovingly picked out by his best friend. But the gift is a curse upon him, in truth, and he’s none the wiser in accepting it. He picks it up carefully, as though it’s made of glass. As though one wrong move and it might shatter into a million pieces.

“Wait!” Basil screams but he sounds like he’s a hundred miles away. So close, too far.

The world holds its breath as Sunny slowly rests the violin between his cheek and shoulder. It looks natural, like it was always meant to be. Like there was no other possible outcome. He lifts the bow and draws it across a single string, producing a long, sad note.

Basil’s eyes shoot open to the all-too-familiar sight of his bedroom ceiling. The room is almost pitch black, and his eyes take a while to adjust as he sits up and looks at the clock. Unfortunately, it’s too dark to see the time clearly. He rubs his head, the dream still lingering in the back of his mind. The violin, Sunny told him not to blame himself for what happened, but how can he ignore what he had done? This was all because of his carelessness. Every time he tries to help others, he ends up hurting them.

“Are you going to stop trying, then?” The Stranger's voice worms into him like an unwelcome guest.

“I already did.”

He gets out of bed, feeling the need to relieve himself rising. He sneaks out of the room, navigating easily despite the darkness. He could probably walk through the house blindfolded if he needed to. The bathroom door is closed, light seeping out of the crack between the door and the floor. Who else would be using the bathroom at this time? He looks over, grandma’s bedroom door is open.

Despite himself, Basil walks over and peers inside.

Someone is sitting on the bed, shrouded in darkness. Isn’t his mom in the bathroom? Before he can speak, the figure turns to look at him, and he can barely make out a familiar face in the gloom.

“Basil, dear.” Speaks someone with an eerily familiar voice, but it can’t be. She died in the hospital a month ago, Basil was there when her heart flatlined. She seems to be knitting something as she speaks, her vague face downcast towards something in her arms. “Still having bad dreams?”

He stands there in stunned silence, body rigid as a corpse.

“I guess so…” She keeps working, occasionally looking up at him. At least, that’s what it looks like. “You’ve changed so much these past few years, I wish I could have helped you more.”

“You never would have accepted her help.” Something says. “You know it.”

“Is something bothering you, dear?” She shakes her head, “You’ve always had such an active imagination, you know. Always getting yourself worked up over nothing.”

He opens his mouth to speak, but the words die before they can escape. What is there left to say? What could he ever say to make up for all his failings? No apology could ever suffice.

“A weak excuse.” The Stranger says.

“These past few weeks have been quite hard on you, I know…” Grandma sounds worn out as she speaks, “You knew this day would come eventually, I had been ill for a long time after all. But now, at least, you don’t have to worry about it anymore. And, about the incident with Mari… You made some pretty big mistakes, but we both know that you have to keep going regardless.”

“I… I’m scared.” Basil utters at last.

“Afraid you have no future?” Grandma tilts her head.

“You deserve no future.” Something says.

Grandma almost seems to smile, but her face is difficult to parse in the darkness. “Dear, you won’t have anything to look forward to if you spend all your time looking backwards. It’s true that your friends might not forgive you, but maybe it’s time to let them go and find new friends.”

“But… they’ll hate me when they learn the truth about me. Everyone will.”

“People have done far worse than you, for far less noble reasons, and managed to remake their lives afterwards. Don’t think you’re the first person who has made such bad decisions.”

“But… how?”

“That’s something you need to figure out yourself.”

“But-” His words are cut off by the sound of the bathroom door opening. He turns to see his mother stepping out of the bathroom, clad in a simple nightgown.

“Basil?” She asks, a bit startled. “What are you doing up?”

He pauses for a moment, his reasons for getting up almost forgotten in the haze of his conversation. He glances back into the bedroom, but there’s nobody there. “I have to pee.”

His mother smiles, “Well I hope I didn’t keep you waiting too long, you need to get a good night’s sleep for tomorrow.”

He nods and shuffles past her into the bathroom. Something observes quietly in the mirror but he pays it no mind. The light of the bathroom is blinding after the gloom of the night, and when he turns the light off as he leaves the house is once again almost pitch black as he inches back into his bedroom. For a moment, it almost looks like a figure stands over his bed, but he blinks and it’s gone.

If only going to sleep were as easy as closing his eyes.

If only he didn’t have to think so much, constantly mulling over the same handful of moments in his life over and over, as if he could find some solution to all his problems he had never considered before.

If only he didn’t have these demons speaking to him all the time.

Eventually, he drifts off into a mercifully dreamless sleep.

The next morning comes and goes in a blur, and both of Basil’s parents can tell he likely didn’t get much sleep. They worry and fuss over his appearance and try to get him to look just right, but he has trouble paying attention to them. He needs to get out, just for a moment at least, before they go to church.

After breakfast, he decides it’s high time he watered the flowers outside. It’s been too long, thankfully Polly has diligently cared for them the past few months. Despite the early hour, the sun already beats down harshly today- a very sharp increase in temperature from the past few days. The air fills with the fragrance of the many flowers lining the house, a smell that was once lovely and comforting but now seems common to the point of being unremarkable. Perhaps being around flowers so much has dulled his appreciation of them, or maybe it’s just him who lost passion for it. Nevertheless, he needs to look after them, no matter what- and it feels good to be needed, even if the flowers can’t thank him for his care.

He takes an old metal watering can and fills it up using the hose- he could probably use the hose itself to water, but he’s always liked tending to each flower individually rather than spraying them all at once.

A myriad of daisies grow outside, all different shapes and colors- yellow, white, orange, blue, each with their own different meanings behind them. Yet all of them are symbols of innocence and loyalty towards those you love. It’s why Basil has always worn a pink daisy in his hair, sometimes a real flower but often simply a hair clip in the shape of one.

Lilies, carnations, irises, perhaps he has a few too many flowers. Grandma loved them almost as much as him, and the work of watering them all was a lot easier when her or later Polly would help out. Having to do it all alone, however, he realizes just how much of a hassle it is to tend to them all. As he tends to some green carnations, a thought suddenly crosses his mind.

What’s Sunny up to right now?

When the two spoke on the phone a few nights ago, Sunny kept the details on his personal life vague. Has he made new friends? Probably would be easy for him, once he gets the courage to start meeting new people. Basil, at least, has never met anyone in town who knew Sunny and disliked him. Kind, thoughtful, a good listener, quick to help people in need- he’s all that and so much more. How could someone not come to love him? He said adjusting to his new home is hard but he’ll flourish if nurtured correctly. Like a flower. Like a white tulip. Simple, modest, and perfect. Hopefully, his new friends will appreciate that, and give him the care he deserves.

He might even be happier with them.

He might never want to come back to Faraway Town. Not like this town has anything but painful memories for him.

Wait, the flower. He looks down, he might have over-watered it a bit. Around the back he goes to the little patch of plants in the backyard. A lot of the plants back here are more food than flowers- peppers, berries, tomatoes, but most aren’t ready to be picked just yet. More flowers sit back here, too, and he needs to refill the watering can before continuing to work on them. Some might need to be trimmed soon, but that can come later in the day when he can afford to get his hands dirty.

A gladiolus, representing strength of character. Aubrey’s flower, if she still cares about that stuff at least. She’s always stood up for what she believes in, though sometimes she makes hasty judgements and acts on her biases. Still, her commitment to doing the right thing is admirable, even if Basil himself has often been on her bad side for it.

“You deserve nothing else.” Something whispers. Yeah, she has every right to hate him, even if the photo album wasn’t actually his fault. He let her believe a lie to protect Sunny, to make sure the even greater lie wouldn’t be revealed.

A rose bush sits under the window of Basil’s bedroom, its flowers the iconic bright red that people most associate with roses. He always thought of Hero when he tended to these roses, because both are loved by everyone. And he was always such a romantic when he was with Mari, no flower could really capture what they had better than the red rose, a symbol of true love. Will he ever love another the same way he loved her? The bush is far too large to water with such a tiny can, so Basil reluctantly grabs the garden hose and sprays the bush down a little before moving on.

The cactus in a little pot doesn’t need any water. It can survive without it for a long time. Resilient, like Kel. Even after years of not speaking to each other, Kel came in and supported Basil without question. ‘We’re still friends,’ he said, but that was before he knew the truth. Before his trust was irreparably broken. Still, though, if Kel was honest about them being friends, why had he never made the effort to talk until Sunny left the house? Unlike the others, he weathered the storm of Mari’s death fine, and came out arguably better off than before. Strong, handsome, athletic, one of the most popular guys in school. Was he simply too busy with all his new friends? Or maybe he simply forgot about Basil? Or maybe he turned a blind eye, because it was easier than trying to confront Aubrey over the issue.

Regardless, Basil was left alone and defenseless all those years.

“Your fault.” Something said.

But, even if he had been the cause of Mari’s death, what kind of friend would leave him alone like that for so long? It’s not like Kel knew he did anything wrong.

Speaking of Mari, a Lily of the Valley sits in the garden at the edge, just on the side of the house, where it can be shaded for part of the day. Despite the name, it’s not actually a lily at all- it’s more closely related to asparagus. Where the flowers would usually hang like bodies on a tree, nothing remains. The flower already bloomed last month in May, and the fruit that came from it has fallen and rotted away in the summer sun. In a few months the top portion of the plant will die, and the roots will wait through the winter before growing forth again in the spring.

If only the same could be said of Mari herself.

Mari… it was like the entire world had been held together by her alone. When she fell, it all came undone. Would things have gone better if he hadn’t tried to hide the truth? Or would they have fallen apart all the same? Either way, his efforts that day were pointless, futile, and worst of all stupid. He only made things worse for Sunny, and himself. He’d turned a simple accident into a secret, a conspiracy, and for what? So Sunny could slowly rot away in his house? So Basil himself would be slowly killed from the inside by the secret? He told himself it was Something behind Sunny that did it, that Sunny could never hurt anyone even by accident.

“But you knew it was a lie from the start.” Something says. “A lie to ease your mind.”

Did he?

“If you knew it was a lie…” The Stranger says. “Why do you still treat it like it’s real?”

Neither of the voices are truly real, he… he knows they aren’t. They can’t be real. Neither could the ghost he saw last night. Yet they haunt him all the same, real or not. Just as Mari still haunts him.

But he’ll persist. Not like he has much of a choice.

After a few more flowers he comes upon the last one, a tall, proud sunflower. When Basil was young, he had learned they always face towards the sun, but having spent years tending to them now he’s realized that it’s not true. When they just sprout it’s true they track the sun, but as they grow they stop and face a single direction. It’s just like him, in a lot of ways. He always wanted to look on the bright side of things, but that was always just wishful thinking. An empty hope, like a prayer, that he could somehow find hope in even the most hopeless situations. Even after everything, he still thought grandma would somehow get better. And now he finds himself hoping beyond hopes that his parents will accept him, after ignoring him for most of his life.

He hated them at first when they showed up, but now he realizes they’re everything he needs. A way out of this life. A fresh start, just like what Sunny gets to have. New clothes, new hair, new home, nobody would know who he is or once was. He could make new friends, finally find love, go to college and get a job, and he’d never return to Faraway Town again. His old friends would never have to deal with his presence again, either. They could all find the happiness they deserve without him constantly reminding them of that day.

It’s too good to be true, though. It can’t be so easy to simply pack up and move on. But he has to believe it, there’s nothing left for him in Faraway Town.

“Basil!” His mom’s voice breaks his train of thought. The dress she’s wearing would be beautiful if it weren’t worn for a funeral- low-cut and short-sleeved, with a belt around the waist of a matching black. Her golden hair is done up in a high bun, and even at this distance Basil can see the fine earrings she’s donned for this occasion. She idly thumbs a crucifix pendant around her neck as she watches him water. “You ready to go soon?”

“Yeah, just about done.”

She nods, her expression uncharacteristically solemn. In the shockingly quite sparse time that Basil has gotten to know his mother, she’s always been a cheerful woman. Her smile comes quickly and easily, in a way that almost would remind him of someone like Kel. But now, standing there in all black, it’s like his mother has suddenly become a real person, not just a two-dimensional figure who occasionally pops into his life to pretend like there’s nothing wrong with him before leaving. At that moment, he feels struck by the most obvious realization in the world.

Her mother died. The person who brought her into this world, who cared for her. The first person who ever loved her. His mind flashes back to grandma’s photo album, all those photos of his mom throughout her entire life, grandma always there with her. It must be painful, even for someone nearing 50, to have to go through this. It’s a pain Basil himself feels keenly, because grandma had been more a mother to him than his actual mother, who always seemed too busy to pay him any mind.

But perhaps now, it could be different. They can share in this pain together, he just has to take the first step. And the second. And the third. Until he’s standing right in front of his mom. She seems like she’s about to turn when he lightly puts a hand on her shoulder. The two lock eyes for a moment, and Basil tries to think of something to say, but it seems like actions would speak louder than words right now. He puts his arms around her and pulls her into an embrace.

“Basil…” Her voice falters.

“Mom, I-I’m sorry. I’ve been acting a bit… selfish lately, I feel. Hiding from you a-and refusing to talk. Arguing with you and dad at every turn.”

“It’s okay, Basil.” She returns the embrace. “You have every right to be mad at us. We… we left you alone…”

“But… you’re here now. That’s all that matters.” He’s not sure if he entirely believes his own words, but they’re the words that need to be said at this moment. For her sake, and for his.

She sniffles a little and he recalls the last time he had such an emotional embrace, outside a hospital with a quiet one-eyed boy who meant the world to him. Words echo through his mind. Words spoken through tears of joy and pain.

“I know you’re afraid… I am, too. But you have to keep strong- I know you can do it.”

This is for the best. It’s time for him to move on and start again. Focusing on the past would only hurt him more.

“...From here on, we’re going to make a lot of new memories on our own… when I come back you can show me all the new ones you’ve made…”

It was a hopeless promise for them to make back then. They’d never meet again, most likely. Sunny, he’ll move on with his life, make new friends, and find love. Why would he ever want to return here? All that’s left in this place is reminders of his sister’s death. It’d be good for Basil to do the same, depart with his parents and leave this whole mess behind. They’ll never see each other again, but that’s a good thing. Their bond only caused them pain.

“Basil… no matter what happens, you’ll always be my best friend…”

This is what’s necessary. They need to move on.

It’s the only way.

It’s the only way.

It’s the only way.

Chapter Text

They arrive at church early, maybe half an hour before mass starts. A few people are already there, it seems, before anything is even set up. Before the dais, upon which the priest’s lectern stands, sits a simple black casket resting on a wheeled platform for ease of transport. Mom had explained it all as they walked here, how they needed to arrive early to greet all the mourners and hear their condolences. Not that he needs explaining, he’s been here once before.

Mom is an only child, so there are no aunts, uncles, or cousins around to join the mourning. And beyond that, to Grandma’s siblings and their children, they never had any contact. So it would just be the three of them, as well as any locals who wished to give their regards.

The family that runs the bakery approaches first, unsurprisingly lacking their mischievous son in a fake blonde wig.

“We’re so terribly sorry for your loss.” Mr. Baker says as he gives Basil a firm, professional handshake. “If you ever need anything, don’t be afraid to ask us.”

“Between this and that Suzuki boy almost dying, this town has had a terrible amount of misfortune recently.” Basil tenses up a little at the mention of Sunny. Do they know he was involved in that incident? That he himself nearly killed himself? It doesn’t seem like it.

They were there the last time, four years ago. The last time Basil had to attend a funeral here. Mrs. Baker had given Sunny’s mom a hug and seemed close to crying herself. They all had nothing but kind words to say- how wonderful Mari was as a neighbor and a friend, how she’s surely with God now, and all other kind words that Basil only half-heard and faintly remembers. Sunny’s parents were barely holding themselves together at the time, but they kept their composure. Sunny gazed off vacantly, not noticing anyone who tried to speak with him- he barely even reacted when Basil had taken his hand and held it tight.

Basil shivers a little, the memory of Sunny’s empty eyes that day feels like a knife to the gut. He takes Mom’s hand and squeezes it gently, not like the hard grip he had on Sunny’s hand at the time.

The next to give well-wishes is the eccentric artist who lives down the street, dragging behind her none other than Angel, who looks like he’d rather be anywhere else. What’s her name? She shakes hands with both of Basil’s parents and introduces herself to them as Faith.

“Angel, give Basil your condolences.” Faith nudges her younger brother in Basil’s direction.

“But I-” Angel’s words are cut off by a light tug on his ear. “Agh, okay okay. Let go, please.” He looks Basil in the eyes, reluctantly. He’s already made his true feelings about Basil clear, and he probably made similar complaints to his sister before she dragged him here to play nice with him. “Er, sorry about your grandma, man.”

“Thank you.” He fakes a smile.

The woman from the pink house also shows up, bringing her two daughters along. The elder girl, Brandi, seems maybe a few years older than Hero, and she looks strong enough to beat Kel in a fistfight. She gives Basil a handshake and expresses deepest sympathies for his loss. The younger girl, Bebe, gives him a bit of a wary look before they move on. They had been there, too, that day. Brandi had looked quite dejected, and talked at length about how much she had always liked Mari, and how she was a great friend to everyone back in high school. Bebe had simply given condolences and kept going. There was also an older brother with them. Bobby? Billy? Something like that. Where is he now? Maybe he moved out, he should be well into adulthood by now.

A woman in red glasses is up next, who pulls Mom in for a friendly hug before shaking hands with Basil.

“This is Joan,” Mom says with a smile, “She’s an old friend of mine.”

“Quite a few fond memories from when we were your age.” Joan chuckles. “You know, I have a couple kids your age, although they didn’t come today.”

“What are their names?”

“Vance and Kim.” She smiles. “They can be quite unruly sometimes but they have good hearts. I’m sure you’d get along.”

“Yeah, I’m sure we would…”

A few more come and go, giving greetings and condolences to the three, and it almost seems like everyone is in place for mass when the final two come hurrying in. It’s Polly, and a man with dirty blond hair and red glasses beside her. Saving the best for last, it seems. Polly shakes hands with his parents with a kind smile, but when her eyes meet his she seems to recoil in shock a little.

“Basil. You look… different.”

“You… You like it?”

“I, uhh, might need a while to get used to you with that haircut.” She chuckles awkwardly, “But it looks good on you, I think.”

“Thanks.” He’s not sure if she means it or not, but the compliment means a lot either way. “And who is this?”

The man smiles, he looks a bit familiar somehow, but Basil can’t place where he’s seen him. “I’m Dylan, Polly’s fiancé.” He shakes Basil’s hand.

“It’s good to meet you.”

“I’m sorry about what happened.” Polly gets a look on her face, one Basil is a bit familiar with. She’s afraid, and more than a little ashamed of herself. She must think it was her fault, that she somehow failed at her job.

“Don’t be too hard on yourself.” Dad puts a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “You’ve done a fine job these past two years, I don’t think anyone could have done much better.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“Miss D’Cruz…” Mom takes Polly by the hand, “I can’t thank you enough for all the work you’ve done.”

Polly smiles, “I was just doing my job, ma’am.”

The two depart and take their seats in the pews, and soon after Basil and his father take their seat in the front row. Mom, however, moves to talk with the priest a little. Odd, being the only members of Grandma’s family there. It was different last time he had been here. All manner of relatives came to pay their respect for Mari. Aunts, uncles, cousins, one of Sunny’s grandfathers was even there. They all were crying. Everyone loved Mari, everyone. How could anyone have thought to hurt her? The idea was almost as absurd as the idea that she might have had it in her to take her own life.

The truth was worse than any of them could have conceived.

But that was the past. No need to think about it anymore. The truth was out, and now he can just move on with his life. He looks down at the little sheet of paper he had been given at the entrance. It was a small obituary of sorts for Grandma- birth date, death date, parents, children, grandchildren all listed. All her life accomplishments, boiled down to a couple paragraphs.

“Good morning.” The priest begins. The churchgoers all reply with similar greetings. “It’s good to see so many people here today, on this most somber Sunday. We gather today to celebrate the life of a long-time member of the community, Beth Halladay. We will begin this with a word from her only daughter, Amanda.”

Mom steps up to the altar and adjusts the microphone to her height. “Good morning, everyone. I’m happy to see so many here today, though I wish I knew most of you better. I…” She goes on speaking, but Basil tunes it all out as he stares at his dress shoes. It might be wise to listen, to learn more about Mom and Grandma, to better understand them. But his mind wanders elsewhere.

He sat towards the front of the pews, just behind Sunny’s family. Grandma was right beside him, a comforting hand on his shoulder. All were quiet at the time, but it wasn’t a peaceful quiet- more a calm before the storm. Aubrey was sitting nearby, barely keeping her composure as Mrs. Suzuki stood before the gathered crowd. Her dress, which almost reached her feet, was almost as dark as the grim atmosphere of the church that day.

“Mari…” She shakily begins. She looked like she only just stopped crying, and was liable to start again at any moment. “Mari was the most extraordinary girl. Smart, charming, kind, responsible, and talented… so, so talented. Baking, piano, she could do anything she put her mind to. Even after hurting her leg and being unable to play sports, she never gave up even for a second. She- She always-” Her voice caught, it was taking all of her strength just to speak.

“She always…” She suddenly collapsed to her knees and began sobbing uncontrollably. Mr. Suzuki rushed up and helped her to her feet. “I-I’m sorry. I can’t. I…” He gently led her away from the altar and back to her spot in the pews, far too close to the casket. Thankfully, it stayed closed for the funeral- her reaction at the wake had been even worse.

“You never once cried for her.” Something says, though Basil ignores it.

“Pay attention.” Dad mumbles, shaking Basil from this unpleasant memory.

“S-Sorry.”

“And… I hope she and dad are finally together again. Thank you for your time.” Mom says. Her speech seems to be over, but she takes a moment to recollect herself. “There’s one other person, though, who I think should be up here.”

She locks eyes with Basil. “Basil… you don’t have to do it if you don’t want to but…”

He gets up slowly and makes his way to the podium. His stomach is in knots already, and his legs feel weak as he walks. When he gets to Mom’s side, he leans beside her ear and whispers. “Mom, I… I can’t-”

“Yes, I know you can.” She whispers back. “Just speak from the heart.”

With that she returns to the pews and takes a seat beside Dad, leaving him alone before dozens of people. And he has to come up with a speech on the fly? He looks at all the people in the crowd- his parents, Angel, Polly, and many he barely knows. What could he say? What words could truly encapsulate his feelings to a room of mostly strangers?

“I-” The microphone lets out a loud screech, almost causing him to jump. He adjusts it a little before continuing. “I’m not sure where to begin. My grandmother was… was…”

“Her heart’s failing!” One doctor yelled as the group rushed in suddenly. They said other things, talked medical jargon, tried to get Basil to leave the room, but those were the only words he really understood. They were trying everything- or at least, that’s what it looked like to him. They brought in specialized equipment and kept working for what felt like a thousand years.

And yet, none of it was working.

A nurse tried to pull him out of the room, saying something about how he shouldn’t be there at a time like this, but he couldn’t move even if he wanted to. His body felt frozen, even breathing was growing difficult as he stood there in total silence.

The heart monitor stopped with a loud, high-pitched note.

They kept trying for a while longer. Trying in vain to reverse what had already been done. Trying to make sure that things can go back to the way they were before. But they could never, would never, go back.

“You thought your life had ended that day.” The Stranger says in a low, almost impossible to hear voice.

“Your life ended four years ago.” Says Something. “You’re just too delusional to realize it.”

He blinks and takes a deep breath, ignoring the voices.

“My grandmother was the most amazing person I’ve ever known. For as long as I can remember, she was always there- from my highest highs to my lowest lows, she supported me the whole way through even… even when I felt like I had lost everything, she was there for me. She was a hard worker, even as her health began failing she always hated being idle.

“It was hard, seeing her in those last few years…” He takes a deep breath and lets out a long sigh, glancing at the closed casket. The tears don’t come, it feels like he’s exhausted them all in these past few weeks. “She always would complain. About needing a wheelchair. About needing a caretaker. About being bedridden most of the day.”

The thing she always seemed most disappointed about was that she couldn’t help in the garden anymore. She always wanted to see some of the flowers he was growing, and would compliment him on how skilled he’s gotten at caring for them.

“Sometimes it got a little annoying, I won’t lie but… I know she just didn’t like feeling like a burden on others. And I know she felt like she couldn’t do as much for me when she was feeling so weak and in pain. I… I guess I know how that feels, too. I hope she can at least rest easy now, knowing I’ll be taking care of the flowers for her. Thank you for listening.”

He returns to his seat without another word. What more is there to say? Mom puts a hand on his shoulder. “I… I’m sorry I put you in the spotlight like that.”

“I was afraid for a second there, when you froze up and started mumbling, but you did a good job.” Dad says in a low voice, patting him on the back. He can’t help but smile a little at that. This must be what it’s like to have normal, loving parents- like what Sunny or Kel have. They’re lucky, they’ll never really understand how hard it is to feel ignored, unloved, and abandoned by their family.

The priest steps up to the altar and begins mass in earnest. For the most part it’s the same rote traditions as Basil remembers, from when Grandma sometimes took him to church- and from the last time he was at a funeral. Hymns are sung, the priest stands and speaks, everyone kneels for certain parts. All as it always has been, and probably always will be.

“... the righteous are taken away,” the Priest says, quoting some passage from the Bible, “to be spared from evil. Those who walk uprightly enter into peace; they find rest as they lie in death.”

Spared from evil… why might God choose to spare some in such a manner, but not others? It seems like just a way to rationalize the whims of life and death. Not like Mari died young because God thought she was too good for this world. Or maybe she was spared, somehow? No, that’s absurd. Mass continues, they take communion, more songs of mourning are sung and prayers prayed.

Basil stood as mass ended and the crowd began to make their way to the cemetery for the burial. Naturally, he drifted over to Sunny’s side, the two lingering together wordlessly as the mourning congregation gathered by the back exits of the church. Sunny didn’t speak, which wasn’t surprising from him, but it was going on a week since he last said anything to anyone. He just gazed off vacantly, like his mind was somewhere else entirely. Nobody ever questioned it- the shock and trauma of finding his sister hanging from a tree seemed like a good enough explanation.

But Basil knew the truth, and knew the pain of keeping it secret was probably what really kept his best friend so silent.

“Everything is going to be okay.” He whispered to Sunny, to no response.

“Basil, get up.” Dad says, breaking his distant train of thought. He looks up to see Dad standing. “It’s time.”

He nods and stands, noting only some of the attendees are staying for the burial. The rest slowly file out, their dues to the dead paid. None can really blame them for leaving- this is normally when church would end, and they probably have more important things to do than watch a box get put into the dirt. Polly and her partner stay, as does the red-glasses woman, and they wait by the exit to the graveyard for the priest.

“I know this isn’t standard…” The priest says. “But, if any would wish to volunteer to be the pallbearers, please step forward.”

Mom gently nudges at Basil and he steps forward, as do both of his parents. Polly decides to volunteer, too. The priest nods, four people seem like enough, and they gather around the corners of the casket to lift it up.

Basil watched alongside Sunny as the pallbearers took up Mari’s casket. There were six, though he did not really know most of them. Mr. Suzuki was one, and Kel had volunteered to fill in when Hero had declined the offer- the rest were cousins of Sunny who Basil had never really met before this day. He already couldn’t remember their names. Sunny’s mom was calming from her last breakdown, but now it was Aubrey’s turn to sob. She followed the pallbearers closely, her wailing drowning out all other sound in the church as it bounced off the walls and multiplied in intensity. Basil wished he could help comfort her, support her, tell her that everything would be okay… but his body remains frozen in place beside Sunny.

He couldn’t. Not after what he’s done. Not with the dark secret he kept.

Some of the adults tried to speak with her, but she ignored them. Hero made no moves to support her, his eyes seemed hopeless and tired. Her parents hadn’t been there, either, by Basil’s recollection- and if they had, they didn’t help their daughter, either.

So Aubrey simply stood there, crying. Surrounded by dozens of people, and yet so very alone.

The group lift the casket gently- two more people might make it a little easier, but this is manageable. It takes some negotiating to get it through the narrow back door, which might have been comical if Grandma’s corpse wasn’t inside it. He tries not to think about that part too much- it’s easier to bear the weight when he thinks of it as just a heavy box, and gives no thought to the contents. Soon everyone is outside and they carry the casket over to its final resting place, a new grave site just opposite of where Mari is laid to rest. The heat now is intense, and it’ll only get hotter as the day goes on. The sun is also right on top of the sky at this point, and without any shade or sunglasses Basil is left squinting as he carries the casket. With a push from all four, the casket is rested onto a platform that will be lowered into the ground.

The memory of Aubrey’s cries still linger as he watches the final blessings and the lowering of the coffin into the ground. He should have been there for her but… How could he have helped? He was only a child. A child, who felt as though the whole of the world was weighing down on him.

“Basil?” Polly’s voice pierces his thoughts momentarily, and he realizes now that he’s started shaking.

A child, that’s all he was, and all he still is. A child crushed under the weight of his mistakes, with nobody to blame but himself. A child, always lying and pretending that everything is fine, hoping vainly that it might become true if he lies about it enough. He puts a hand to his face and feels wetness around his eyes. When had he started crying?

“I-I’m fine, it’s just…” Mom sweeps in quickly and pulls him into a hug, just as he had done earlier in the morning. Polly pats him on the shoulder reassuringly, but likely feels it would be too awkward to join the hug herself.

“It’s okay.” Mom says softly. “I’m proud of you, Basil. You kept your composure for all this time but it's okay to cry now.”

So Basil allows himself to cry a little- for Grandma, for Mari, for Sunny, and for his own weakness. Mom and Polly stood close to comfort him, while Dad watched quietly from nearby. Everyone else, barring Polly’s partner, has already left after the final blessing. The casket will be buried soon, but that process is too time-consuming to do in front of everyone.

Wiping the tears from his eyes, Basil takes one last look back at the headstone.

REQUIESCAT IN PACE

ELIZABETH HALLADAY

13 APR. 1933 - 25 MAY. 2004

Goodbye, grandma. Until we meet again.

“You ready to go?” Mom asks as he pulls away from her embrace.

“Almost. There’s just… one more thing I need to do.” He walks over to the other side of the cemetery grounds, his parents following curiously. Mari’s grave, as clean and well-maintained as he imagined it would be- no flowers, though. There had been so many there last time he was here at her funeral. Many different kinds, but most were lily-of-the-valleys, it seemed. Everyone knew she loved them most, but nobody knew it was because of him and his love of flowers.

Mom and Dad soon join him, staring at the grave in silence for a moment.

“Mari,” Dad says. “She was your friend, right?”

“Yeah.”

“She’s the one who…” His voice trails off, not wanting to say what Basil knows he wants to say.

“Hanged herself?”

Mom’s face seems plastered with concern, and more than a little regret. “It must have been so hard for all of you at that age.”

“I… still don’t understand it.” Basil says- it wasn’t quite a lie, but they won’t understand what he means. “I still think about her every day.”

The three stand in silence for a moment, his parents likely at a loss for words on how to react to that. They weren’t here for him, all that time. They could never know how much he truly suffered, how much he hurt himself just getting through each day.

“I’ll meet you at the house, if you don’t mind.” He says absentmindedly.

“Alright, take as much time as you need.” Mom takes Dad by the arm and the two leave together. Polly soon joins him, still lingering with her partner long after everyone else has left.

“Basil… You’ve changed a lot these past few days.” Polly says with a concerned look. The tone in her voice makes it very clear- she thinks something is wrong with him, that this change is somehow a negative affliction on him. “You almost look like a different person.”

“I… I’m finally growing up.” He locks eyes with Polly for a moment as he speaks. “I’ve spent these past four years hiding, refusing to accept that the world has changed. Now, though, I finally feel like I can move on with my life, and move on from all this… unpleasantness.”

“You really think that?”

“Yeah.” He looks back at Mari’s grave, knowing this will be the last time he ever lays eyes on it. “It’s time for me to stop living in the past.”

Chapter Text

“Thanks again for letting me crash at your place.” Aubrey doesn’t take her eyes off the clouds as she speaks. It’s quite beautiful out this morning, not too hot or cold. “When I said I wasn’t feeling like going home, I really wasn’t expecting you to smuggle me into your bedroom without your mom realizing I was there.”

“Don’t even think about it.” Kim says in her characteristic relaxed manner. “You should thank Vance for putting up with us.”

“Heh, you’re right I suppose.” The previous day had been quite an unexpected ordeal, and her mom’s stupidity had left Aubrey absolutely fuming for a while. She spent most of that evening in the park with her friend, but when night came she wasn’t in the mood to head back home and deal with her mom just yet. Now here she is, reclining on the roof of Kim’s house of all places. This isn’t the first time the two have set up here- with a ladder they can easily reach the roof above the garage, and few people ever seemed to notice them up here. “Still, you didn’t have to share your breakfast with me. I’m used to going without it.”

“And that’s exactly why I did it.” Aubrey can’t help but smile a little at that comment. Once, she rarely let any of her friends know the full extent of her home life, out of a sense that they’d look on her with pity. They all had it so much better than her, after all, in their clean houses full of expensive toys and electronics. “You’re clearly going through some shit right now, would be worse to have to do it on an empty stomach.”

Aubrey turns to look at Kim, who is staring at her with a smirk. Her eyes, such a brilliant shade of amber, seem to almost glow golden in the morning light. Her deep brown hair only fully covers the right half of her hair, but the hair on the left seems to be growing out a little. Maybe she’ll try a new style, or maybe she’ll just shave again soon.

“It almost felt like being a kid again. Getting to sleep over with a friend, staying up late to watch TV. Not having to worry about whatever the hell my mom is doing downstairs.”

“Did your sleepovers as a kid normally involve so much kissing?”

“Probably not.” She looks back up to the sky, resting her hands under her head. “Probably can’t do this again tonight, though. Seems like pushing our luck a little.”

“True, but I’ll be staying at my dad’s place for the week starting tomorrow. I’m sure he’d be more open to letting you stay over than my mom.”

“Especially after I helped fix that leaky pipe he was struggling with.”

Kim chuckles, “I almost forgot you did that. What compelled you into helping him like that?”

She shrugs, “I dunno, Sunny seemed weirdly invested in your dad fixing the pipe and… I thought I might as well lend a hand, I guess.” It was all Sunny, that day, he seemed to love leading the other three into random encounters with their neighbors as they were waiting for Basil to get back from the hospital. They had even helped the newlywed couple who had moved in two doors down from Aubrey to cook dinner for their housewarming party. Not quite how Aubrey had hoped to spend her first day reunited with her old friends.

“I don’t want to pry too much…” Kim says after a moment of silence, “but what are you thinking of doing about him and Basil?”

“What do you mean?”

“You can’t just stew in your anger forever. Especially once school starts.” She shifts a bit closer to Aubrey. “You’ll have to see Basil in school every day, knowing what he’s done.”

Aubrey lets out a shaky sigh. “Basil… I don’t know what to do with him, to be honest. Have you seen his new haircut?”

Kim sits up suddenly, looking Aubrey in the eyes as she continues to stare upward at the clouds. “No, what’s so weird about it?”

“It’s so… bland. And nothing like Basil at all.” She sits up. “It’s like he’s trying to become a different person. As if he can just pretend everything he did never happened and move on with his life.”

“You sure it wasn’t just for the funeral?”

“I mean… I’ve almost never seen him change his haircut so much. Not even for the last funeral we went to…” She raises a hand and realizes she clenched her fist without noticing. “It just feels like he thinks a new haircut and a slight change in clothes can make him a new person, help him escape the consequences of his actions.”

“You think he’ll try to run away?”

“With his parents? I’m not sure.”

Kim thinks for a moment, then she gets a devilish look on her face, her eyes almost seeming to glitter as she speaks. God, she’s beautiful when she’s like this. “ Well, if you’re so afraid of his escaping any consequences, why don’t we just go ahead and make sure he faces them right now?”

“What do you mean by that? You want to barge into church and beat him up?” She raises an eyebrow. Basil should be in church right now, seeing as Kim’s mom had left to attend the funeral - apparently she and Basil’s mom are old friends - and Aubrey hasn’t felt comfortable going there after the fight. Like hell she’s going to start another scene there in the middle of a funeral.

“Hah! That would be quite the stir, but no. I got something even better .” She throws her arm around Aubrey’s shoulder. “Think about it, with Basil and his parents occupied, do you think anyone is home right now?”

Polly could potentially be there, but she’s more likely at church with the rest of them. Other than her, nobody else would likely be there. Perfect for a break-in, perhaps? “No but… what are you intending to do at his place?”

“He’s got that bigass garden outside his house, right? With all those dumb gay flowers he loves so much.”

Aubrey nods wordlessly. There’s only one reason she can see why Kim might be so interested in the garden, but it would be better to hear her say it herself.

“Well,” Kim continues, “I say we go over there and wreck the place up!”

Aubrey’s eyes widen- she’s not sure if she’s more shocked by Kim suggesting this, or the fact it took this long for the idea to come up. She already knows what happened with Mari, and what happened between Sunny and Basil that got them hospitalized- Aubrey had told her all of it. Since then, Kim has been even more overtly hateful of Basil, as if she personally was affected by Mari’s death. Perhaps it’s just her desire to protect Aubrey from people who have hurt her. Still… the garden, it means everything to him. It’s always been his pride and joy, and the thing everyone knows him by.

“Mari meant everything to you.” The thought rises unbidden from the depths of her hate, and she can’t help but see the twisted logic to it.

Still…

“I’m not sure about that. Wouldn’t his neighbors see us?”

Kim laughs. “They already hate us! Why should we care what some stupid parents think?”

“They’d call the police.”

“You think the cops will really care about a few smashed up flower pots?”

“Do you really want to test them like that?”

Kim lightly pushes her shoulder. “Come on, Aubrey, have a little backbone. No risk, no reward, am I right? Don’t give me that look, it’ll be fun.” She grins widely. That smile, that damn smile. How can she be so irresistible?

“Alright, fine.” Aubrey can’t help but smile a little seeing Kim’s delight. She still has reservations, sure, but perhaps she could blow off some steam this way. Besides, Basil can always just regrow his garden, not like it will be the end of the world.

“Then what are we waiting for? An invitation?” Kim stands up dramatically, almost stumbling on the sloped roof. “Let’s go!”

A few minutes later the two find themselves outside Basil’s house, which lies entirely empty. Vines creep up the off-white walls, and there are flowers scattered around in front of the house and in the driveway on the side.

“So fucking green in there.” Kim says as she peers through the window. “The wallpaper, the carpet, the kitchen tiles- even the couch is green!”

“Yeah, even the bathroom walls are green.”

“Of course Basil would have an entirely green house like this.” She looks around the garden. “Would be easier with a bat…”

“I told you, I left it at home.” Aubrey picks up one of the flower pots and looks at it closely- it’s a new sprout, she’s not really sure what type of plant it is. “We can just do this by hand.”

She throws the pot at the wall, shattering the ceramic and spreading dirt everywhere.

“Nice throw!” Kim laughs before picking up a larger flowerpot and smashing it against the pavement. “Isn’t this fun?”

“Yeah.” Aubrey says, finding it hard to resist Kim’s magnetic enthusiasm. God, she’s beautiful, so beautiful it’s easy to forget how cruel she is.

What comes next is nothing short of a whirlwind of destruction. Pots smashed, plants uprooted, tipping over a rack of flowers. Kim even knocks over the trash bin, though wisely they avoid the rental car Basil’s parents are using. When they go around the back they find even more plants all lined up neatly against the wall.

“If only we had something to destroy this rose bush.” Kim muses. It’s unfortunately too large and thorny for them to tear it up with their bare hands, so they content themselves with the other plants around it. Aubrey yanks the gladiolus out of the dirt while Kim smashes the potted cactus against the ground. Basil had once said the flower reminded him of her, because she always stood up for what she believed in. Was she doing that right now? Does she really believe that hurting Basil is the right thing, or that it will even make her happy? She tosses the plant aside- it’s just a stupid flower, why should she place so much weight on whatever made up symbolism it supposedly has?

Kim moves to pull out the Lily-of-the-Valley, but Aubrey raises her hand. “No. Leave that one.”

“Why?” She stares at Kim in silence for a moment, not sure what to say. Even now, when she just rejected the flower symbolism Basil loves so much, she finds herself unable to separate the Lily-of-the-Valley from Mari. Kim shrugs, “Whatever you say.”

She takes a glance back at the flower before continuing on.

Aubrey hates to admit it, even to herself, but the thrill of this feels damn good. Doing something bad and not caring what other people think. Just like she had been before Sunny decided to force his way back into her life and fill her head with doubt and regret.

“I gotta say, I’m feeling pumped up now after that.” Kim says as they leave the backyard. She does indeed look very energized, grinning almost madly as she adjusts her glasses and looks upon the devastation they wrought. They sure did a number on this place, Basil will probably cry loud enough to hear it across town when he sees it. He’ll fall to his knees and cry and then…

And then what?

Is anything really going to get better for her because of that? Mari is still dead. Her mom is still a worthless loser driving them into destitution. Her life is still a total mess, and it’s not like hurting Basil makes her feel any better about it.

Shit, what happens if Kel and Hero find out? They’ll probably be very disappointed that she’s back to doing this again. Goddamn why didn’t she think this through?

“Aubrey?” Kim shakes her from her thoughts with an arm around her shoulder. She smiles playfully, and in an instant all Aubrey’s doubts fade away. To hell with Basil. To hell with Kel and Hero. To hell with her mom. All that matters now is Kim. “You feel better now?”

Without thinking, Aubrey kisses her. “I think so.”

Kim’s face lights up with delight. She really is beautiful, so beautiful she can make Aubrey forget her guilt for a moment. “Hey.” Kim whispers as their faces sit close together. “Why don’t we go to our hangout spot for a little alone time toge-”

“Hey!” A voice calls out behind them. Shit. Shit. Shit. Someone’s seen them. Why did she get distracted kissing Kim? They should have left immediately. The two turn around to see a girl with light blue hair glaring them down. “What the hell are you two doing?”

Shit, Cris. Of all the people to catch them in the act, it has to be someone who knows Kel and Hero personally.

“Mind your own goddamn business.” Kim sneers. They’ve rarely spoken to Cris before, but Kim has never seemed very fond of the swimmer. In all honesty, Aubrey felt a little resentment towards her in the past, herself. Seeing Kel hanging out with another girl felt like a stab in the back at the time, but Cris never did anything to earn that ire.

Cris crosses her arms and sighs, her pale green eyes seem full of annoyance. “I should have known.”

“What does that mean?” Aubrey grumbles.

“Kel told me that you’re a good person at heart, but I should have realized…” Her eyes drift over the destruction around the two.

Aubrey shrugs, “What? That he’s wrong about me? He knows exactly what Basil has done, why he deserves this.”

“Then I’m sure you wouldn’t mind me telling him all about this.”

Aubrey grits her teeth, she really shouldn’t have said that, act like Kel would be in support of this action.

Kim crosses her arms and gives a smirk, “I’d tell you not to stick your nose into other people’s business, but with a nose like that I’m sure you just can’t help it.”

“You bitch .” Cris balls her hand into a fist and seems almost ready to fight Kim, but quickly steps away with a groan. “Fine, if you want to be that way, then I won’t stop you.” She turns and walks away.

“We should stop her.” Aubrey blurts out as she goes. “We can’t-”

“Who gives a fuck about what that idiot says?” Kim interrupts. “You know what they say about blondes.”

Aubrey sighs. “Whatever, let’s just go.”

Kel hesitates outside Cris’ house, looking at the blue door intently. Man, the Church family really love the color blue, don’t they? The door is blue, the roof is blue, the wallpaper inside is blue, even the carpets they have are blue. No surprise then that Cris started dyeing her hair blue a few years ago. His hand is held up as if to knock, but he can’t seem to move it. He looks over to Hector, sitting patiently on his leash- mom had told him to take the dog for a walk today, and it seems like the best of both worlds to take him to the park with Cris.

He sighs. What to say to her? She’s always been so kind and open with him, and she likely expects the same from him. Is he ready to tell someone the truth of what happened? Let someone in on the greatest secret of his life? Hector barks at something, probably just a squirrel.

“Here goes nothing.” He pulls his hand back a little to knock on the door.

“Yo Kel!” Cris’ voice calls out from behind him, he turns and sees her standing in the driveway. She’s got a plain white t-shirt and a pair of short jean shorts on today, and her blue hair is kept loose as it usually is- her natural dirty blonde color isn’t visible at all, she must have redone her hair color recently.

“Cris. I, er, thought you’d still be home.”

She laughs. “Sorry, I wanted to go for a quick jog first. Oh, I see you brought Hector.” The dog rushes to greet her as she walks up to the two, and she kneels down to give him a scratch behind the ear while telling him how much of a good boy he is.

“You look nice today.” He smiles.

“Thanks, man. You look nice, too.” He glances down at his clothes briefly- a red t-shirt and cargo shorts. Is that really that nice?

“Heh, thanks.” He scratches the back of his head. “So uh, was thinking we just hang out at the park for the afternoon, how’s that sound?”

“Fine by me.”

The two eagerly catch up a little as they walk to the park, though Kel strategically avoids talking too much about anything involving Basil. He really does feel bad not talking to her sooner, but he’s just had a lot to deal with regarding both Hero and Aubrey. As they talk they arrive at the park, finding it not too busy at the time. Kel lets Hector off his leash, and the three idly start playing fetch with a tennis ball he brought as he and Cris continue to talk.

“I saw Aubrey earlier.” Cris says after a moment of silence between the two. She sounds upset.

He sighs, already knowing where this is going. “What did she do?”

“She and Kim were vandalizing Basil’s house!”

“What?!” He would never expect Aubrey to do something so cruel, especially on the day of Basil’s grandmother’s funeral.

“They smashed all the plants outside his house,” she continues, “all the flower pots were smashed! They even yanked plants out of the ground.”

“Did you say anything?” Hector rushes back with the ball in his mouth, but Kel is too wrapped up in the conversation.

Cris pouts a little, “I did, but that douche Kim had the gall to laugh and insult my nose.”

“Yeesh, never seen you so upset over something like this.” That doesn’t seem out of character for Kim, from what Kel knows of her. The vandalism was likely also her idea, most likely- Aubrey seemed content to simply leave Basil alone, only Kim could have gotten her to do something like this. Hector drops the ball and nudges it in Kel’s direction, he picks it up and throws it again.

Cris goes quiet for a moment. “What went on with you and Basil? Aubrey seems to think you’d agree with her actions.” It’s the question Kel has been dreading this whole time.

“It’s, er, complicated.”

She shrugs, “We have all the time in the world.”

He thinks for a moment about what to say before going into it- not the truth, but the best he can give. He talks about Mari’s ‘suicide’ and how it broke everyone up, how Aubrey felt betrayed by everyone, how the photo album was vandalized and Aubrey blamed Basil for it. It feels good to get some of this off his chest, but at the same time he can’t help but feel guilty about lying. Well, it’s not really a lie, he’s just using one truth to hide a larger truth.

“So, you’re not even sure if Basil or Sunny was the one to black out the photos?”

Kel nods- Sunny claimed he was the one to do it, but he still feels like he might just have been trying to cover for Basil.

“That really doesn’t seem like something worth getting so upset over.”

“I, uh, have a feeling that it was Kim’s idea to do that.”

“I don’t care whose idea it was.” Cris crosses her arms and pouts. “They both were responsible.”

He sighs, knowing there’s no argument against that. “I’ll talk to her.”

“She must mean a lot to you, if you cut her so much slack.” There’s a twinge of frustration in her voice as she says this- frustration and, perhaps, a bit of jealousy? But she’s right, perhaps he’s giving her a little too much leeway right now. She and Kim both need to be given a stern talking to, but they wouldn’t listen to it if Kel said it. Maybe he can get Hero to help? She’s more likely to listen to him.

“Cutting her out of my life only made things worse last time. I can’t afford to make the same mistake.”

Cris nods in understanding. “I hope you’re right about her.”

“I hope so, too.” For her sake, as much as his own.

Hero takes a bucket of paint off the wall and inspects it closely- Dad was very specific on the brand and color he needs to repaint the fence, all he needs to do is get it. This seems to be the right one.

“Aye! Hero!” A familiar voice calls to him, and he turns to see Brandi wave to him with a giggle. She wears her usual crop top and shorts, giving a clear look at her toned arms and abs. She must work out at the gym a lot to keep that body. “I didn’t expect to see you here. Running errands for your parents, too?”

“Yeah, I was just about to head home actually.”

She smiles and steps up beside him, crossing her arms across her chest. “You up to chat for a second first?”

Brandi’s feelings for Hero are very well-known to him at this point, as she’s never really been one to hide them. He, for the most part, tries to ignore her advances. It’s not that he doesn’t find her attractive, far from it in fact, but he’s not ready yet. This doesn’t seem like one of her romantic advances, however. “Er, sure. What is it?”

“I was at the funeral earlier today.” She says as she thumbs through some paint sample guides.

“The funeral?”

She giggles. For someone so tough-looking, she giggles like a schoolgirl a lot. “The one for Basil’s grandmother. Did you forget it was today?”

“Oh, yeah, must have slipped my mind.” Probably not the best excuse for not going to a funeral, actually.

“Really?” She gives a look of skepticism. “Aren’t you and Basil close? I thought you and your brother, of all people, would be there.”

“I’d rather not talk about it.”

She tilts her head, confusion plain in her dark brown eyes. “Would you happen to know of anyone who might have reason to hate him?”

“Why do you ask?”

“Because someone vandalized his house earlier. I saw it on the way home from church.”

Oh no, Aubrey, it had to be her. She must be quite upset about something if she’d do something so drastic. “He probably won’t take that very well…”

“Why don’t you go see him? I would, but I don’t think he’d accept a visit from a stranger like me.”

He turns to leave. “It’s complicated.”

“Is this about Mari?”

He stops, his shoulders tense up a little. She’s right, of course, but he didn’t expect her to be so blunt about it. “Why do you think that?”

She giggles, though it’s more a brief exhale than a proper laugh. “It’s always about Mari, isn’t it?”

It is. It really is. “I… I have to go now.” He starts walking away.

“You free this Wednesday? Some friends and I are going to the movies.”

That sounds suspiciously like a date. “I’ll see.” He says, sure he’ll find an excuse to not go. It would be nice to make a few friends around his age, sure, but… he’s just not ready yet. Not ready to let her go.

Chapter Text

It’s all gone. Every flower. Every plant. All those years and years of work, wasted. Basil stands frozen as his parents assess the damage. Polly puts a hand on his shoulder and says something, but he barely notices as he steps forward to inspect the damage more closely. Dirt strewn everywhere, plants torn up and entirely uprooted, ceramic flower pots shattered all across the pavement. Dad sighs and shakes his head as he examines one smashed flower pot.

“Who could have done this?” His question seems to not be directed at anyone specific, but he probably expects Basil to know.

His mind races as he looks around the back to find more such destruction, his mind races. Who could have done this? The hooligans, perhaps. Aubrey and Kim seem the type to do it, would they have gotten Kel or Hero onboard? The idea seems a bit absurd, and yet…

The lily of the valley sits untouched, alongside the rose bush. The bush makes sense, whoever did it probably only had their bare hands to break things, but the lily of the valley is another matter. That was a sure sign of Aubrey, Hero, or Kel being here. Maybe all of them. He can see it now, them laughing as they destroy everything he holds dear. They knew he’d be at the funeral today, no doubt. They probably had this all planned out in advance, but for how long? Days? Weeks? Maybe they hatched up the plan the moment they all left his hospital room after they learned the truth of Mari’s death.

Mari, if she hadn’t died, none of this would have happened. If Sunny had been more honest with his feelings, if he had just told them he didn’t want to play violin instead of bottling it all up until he lashed out at his sister. It was his fault, and now Basil has to pay for trying to bail him out of his mistakes, while Sunny gets to live consequence free wherever he’s ended up living now.

“It’s your fault for getting yourself involved.” Something says. “This is what you get for it, you don’t deserve to complain about it.”

He wanted to help at the time, he thought Sunny would be grateful, and that they’d be together forever after that. But Sunny abandoned him, and now he’s been left alone again.

“You, solely, are responsible for this.”

“Sunny, he could have prevented all of this.” Basil’s voice is low as he sits down beside the lily of the valley. “He… he’s a good person. How could he have done that?”

"How could you have done that?"

“T-that’s obvious, isn’t it?” He’s a terrible person, of course he did something like that so easily. It’s the only answer he can think of.

“Then Sunny must be a terrible person, too.” The Stranger adds.

Yes. It all adds up. And yet… no. Sunny can’t be a bad person.

“Why not?”

“He… He just can’t.”

He pushes the thought aside and gets up again. Dad seems ready to clean it all up himself, but Basil waves him off to do it himself. The plants are his responsibility, after all. He’ll take care of them, even if that means having to clean up what’s left and throw it all away. Maybe it’s a good thing, actually. He’d have to leave it all behind eventually, if he wants to move out with his parents. Would be hard for him to let go of all his flowers, but now he doesn’t have to worry- at least, when it comes to the ones outside, the ones that can’t be moved. Yes, Aubrey and the others did him a favor, actually.

Once he’s finished with this, he gets inside and quickly goes into his room to shrug off the black suit jacket and pull off the tie. He’d normally change into something more casual, but just dropping the jacket and tie feels like enough right now. His heart races as he sits down on his bed and takes a few deep breaths. In through the nose, out through the mouth, he’s heard it’s the best way to relax a skyrocketing heart rate. In through the nose, out through the mouth.

Okay, the garden. It was obvious that Aubrey was likely involved. Probably some of the hooligans, too, but which ones he can’t say. Would it really matter which ones did it? They’d all probably rush to Aubrey’s defense if she were accused. Kel and Hero, however, probably weren’t involved, now that he sits back and reflects on it.

“How do you know?” Something asks.

“It just isn’t like them.” Even if they hate him, they’d never be so brazen, so destructive, so uncaring about the consequences.

“They don’t lie and hide who they really are…” The Stranger remarks. “Unlike you.”

“Yeah…” He sighs and lays back on his bed. 

There’s not much for him to do today, so he decides it would be best to simply stay in his room and stare at the ceiling for a while. The two specters continue to haunt him as he rests, unfortunately, but it isn’t anything he hasn’t heard before. He really can’t leave town soon enough. The Stranger kept telling him that leaving would be useless, that his pain will always follow him, but what does it know? It’s just a voice in his head, after all. A voice of constant doubt and second-guessing.

I can’t afford to second-guess myself anymore. He thinks to himself as he gazes at the all too familiar ceiling. The white paint was older than Basil himself, and it showed its age in every crack and chip. Grandma had been talking about hiring someone to work on the ceilings a little, but that was before she was too sick to get out of bed. Even if I regret my actions, it’s better than regretting my inaction.

Mom knocks and opens the door a small crack. “I made you some lunch, if you want it.” She sets down a plate on the floor and closes the door again, not even waiting to see if he’ll thank her for it. A sandwich, nothing special. He slowly inches out of bed and picks up the plate, eating while sitting on his bed. Normally, he’d be worried about getting crumbs on his bed, but for some reason it doesn’t really bother him now. It doesn’t really matter, does it? Stains can be washed, crumbs can be vacuumed, even blood can be cleaned up with enough effort…

Blood on the floor. Blood on his clothes. Blood on his hands. He even felt some on his face, but he wasn’t sure if it were his own or-

He shakes his head, as if to force the memory out. He… he saved Sunny, didn’t he? He’s free now, and happy for the first time in what seems like an eternity. Free from the guilt, free from the lies, free from Something haunting his every step. He was finally allowed to live again, even if the price was so terrible. Sunny even told him not to blame himself for what happened then so… did he do the right thing?

“No.” Something and The Stranger say in unison.

Another knock on the door, how long has it been? He already finished his lunch some time ago, the plate sitting by the door to be picked up later.

“Yes?”

The door peaks open a little, it’s Dad. “We were thinking about watching that movie before dinner. Are you up for it? It might help take your mind off of, well, you know.”

“I’m fine.”

“You’ve been sulking all day.”

Basil lets out a sigh. Dad’s right, of course- he has been cooped up in his room since he got home. Perhaps a good movie could lift his spirits. What was the one dad bought yesterday? He gets out of bed. “I guess… It has been a while since we’ve had a movie night.”

“Yeah…”

Soon he finds himself in the living room with his parents- both have changed into more casual clothes for the day, while Basil himself still hasn’t shed the collar shirt and dress pants from the funeral. Mom wears yet another fancy dress, a light blue that seems to match her eyes. How much does her wardrobe cost? He can’t recall any of his friends’ parents ever dressing so nicely every single day. Dad’s clothes seem a lot more casual- at least, casual for a man like him. He sets the box for the movie beside him as he fusses with the DVD player. Paper Trail. , that’s the title.

“What’s the movie about, again?” Basil asks slowly.

Dad shrugs, “I remember seeing some reviews of it a couple years ago, apparently it’s really good. Other than that, I like to go into movies as blind as possible.”

“I swear,” Mom says, shaking her head with a small smile, “You sometimes watch something entirely based on whether you like the title or not.”

“That’s what a title is for, isn’t it?”

“That, er, makes sense to me. I guess.” Basil says as he sits down on the couch on mom’s right. Dad’s words feel a bit reductive, but not exactly wrong. Still, it’d be nice to know what he’s getting into beforehand- especially with a title so… provocative.

“I mean,” Dad continues as he puts the disc in. “What’s the worst that can happen? I watch a boring movie? Waste a couple dollars and a few hours of my day?”

Basil thinks for a moment, “You could miss out on a good movie with a bad title.”

“Well then I’ll just hear about it another day and watch it then. Not like the movie stops existing.”

“Do… you watch a lot of movies?”

Mom nods, “When we have the free time, at least.”

Dad takes a seat on the couch to Mom’s left, leaving her in the middle between them. “Well, it’s one of the upsides of traveling abroad so often- we can see things that are never released over here. Anyways, let’s start.”

“We probably should have gotten popcorn first.” Mom mumbles as Dad hits ‘play’ on the movie’s menu.

The movie is a noir story, the detective searching for the man who murdered his girlfriend. The perpetrator left many clues around just for him, in the form of notes left in places he would know to look. It’s quite gripping a story, and the three rarely speak as they watch. He glances over at his parents- they seem so relaxed now, Dad putting an arm around Mom as they watch. Dad chuckles at a joke in the movie- is this the first time he’s laughed since he’s gotten here? It feels almost uncanny, seeing them so happy right now, and he almost loses focus on the movie entirely as he ponders this.

Yes, that’s right, the detective is following a strong lead on the case, something about his girlfriend’s ex. But everyone else in the story seems to be acting strange around the detective- or, rather, maybe he’s the one acting strange? Others seem to treat him with an odd amount of suspicion. Or perhaps he’s simply misinterpreting their words as being suspicious? The movie keeps it very ambiguous as to how reliable his point of view is, and it’s clear there’s something very off.

Dad mumbles something about an actor looking familiar, Mom chuckles a little when she recognizes the person he’s talking about. Basil isn’t sure who the person is- it’s been a while since he really sat down and watched a movie, hasn’t it? He used to watch kids’ movies with his friends a lot, and sometimes he’d watch something with Grandma around the holidays, but they hadn’t been able to in a couple years. Polly asked once or twice in the past but he never really was in the right place mentally to focus on a movie at the time- hopefully they’ll have some time to watch a movie together in the near future. Before he leaves.

He moves a little closer to Mom as they continue watching- he almost wants to rest his head on her shoulder, but he’s far too old for that kind of affection with his parents.

The detective is close to the truth now, he can feel it. The clues have led him on a wild goose chase, through many places important in his life, and he starts wondering if the culprit is someone close to him. He knows so much about the detective’s personal life, and his sometimes rocky relationship with his girlfriend. It couldn’t be the ex, he wouldn’t know so much about his work or home life- it couldn’t be his girlfriend’s neighbor either, even if she clearly had some animosity towards her. Her brother? He did seem evasive and suspicious when questioned. The questions mount as the detective finds the final note left for him, hidden in a small safe in his own home. Who could have gotten into this safe? He reads the note carefully, it tells him to go to a specific location in his backyard and dig a few feet down. There he finds a box, and in it a cassette tape.

He puts the tape in his cassette player.

It’s his voice speaking, quiet and vacantly. He explains carefully what has happened- an argument with his girlfriend turned into a fight, and in a fit of rage he had held her head in a full bath tub until she had gone still.

Basil shudders, the memory of his own fairly recent brush with drowning coming to the surface unbidden. Water in his mouth. Water in his nose. Water dragging him down like a weight on him. Why did he never learn how to swim? For any normal person, being pushed in the lake would have just been an annoyance, not a life or death situation.

“You’re weak.” Something whispers. “You say you want to care for others, but you’re too weak to even care for yourself. You said you were trying to save him, but in truth you sat and waited for him to save you .”

Basil tries to ignore Something and keep watching, but he suddenly feels lightheaded. He grips the armrest of the couch.

“He lied to himself.” Stranger says of the movie protagonist, “He could not live with the weight of his actions, so he deluded himself.”

“Yet he knew that he had to face the truth, even if he did not want to.” Something adds.

Go away. He tries his best to ignore them and keep watching the last few minutes of the movie, but he can feel himself shaking a little. Hasn’t he already faced the truth? Hasn’t he suffered enough? The lake, the garden, and a hundred other indignities rush through his mind. Years and years of humiliation, social isolation, name calling- everyone in school hates him, and they don’t even know him. Know the things he did. It all circles back to her. To Aubrey. At every turn she’s been there to ruin his life. All over a vandalism that he hadn’t done. He never even needed to pretend he did it, she just assumed he was the culprit the moment she saw it.

He can practically feel Something wrapping itself around him as it speaks, “You deserve it all. And worse.”

“You okay, Basil?” He turns to see Mom looking at him with concern. “You look pale.”

“I’m fine.” He forces a smile. “I, uh, need to use the bathroom.”

He slips into the bathroom as always. When did he start using this room as his respite? It’s an easy place to hide- nobody questions why you’re going to the bathroom, or why you locked the door, or why you’re in there for a long time.

“You can’t keep hiding.” Stranger says. “You have to face them. You have to tell them the truth.”

Basil leans over the sink and gazes into the mirror. What gazes back is a grim parody of Basil. Short hair, plain clothes, empty eyes. In a strange way, it feels relieving to see this, and not a reminder of the person he once was. It feels as though his appearance finally reflects how he feels, as grim as that might be.

“They already know the truth.” He sighs. “Sunny told them everything. What more is there to say?”

“Not them. ”

“My… my parents?” He could never tell them. Why does he owe them the truth? They’ll just disown him, abandon him again. He can’t do that, not when they’re so close to accepting him.

“It’s for your sake, not theirs.” Stranger says.

Something watches behind him, but says nothing. What is it thinking? Does it think? He tells himself it’s not real, but maybe he’s just lying to himself again. Which would be easier to live with?

“How can I tell the truth when I can’t even figure out what’s true?”

“You already know what you must tell them.”

He washes his hands and slowly exits the bathroom to find Dad in the hallway, pretending she wasn’t waiting outside for him. He looks a bit contemplative, but doesn’t say anything as Basil walks past him

“Your mother and I are planning to go out for dinner.” Dad says just as he reaches for the doorknob. “If you’re not feeling well… you can stay home. We’ll bring you back something.”

Basil nods wordlessly and enters his room once more. Back to his bed, past the place where blood once soaked the floor, past where he planned to end himself, past where Sunny had scribbled over all the photos in the photo album. The room feels suffocating now. Every pain suffered in this room seems to surround him at once. How could he ever sleep in a room like this? Every inch of it seems to be coated in regrets and mistakes.

“Tell them.” Stranger says.

“They won’t believe me.” Basil whispers. “Or worse, they’ll only hate me for it. For this. ”

“Then accept your end.” Something finally speaks up after its long silence. “Why keep going? They’ll find out eventually either way. Do you think you can hide this forever?”

Silence.

The walls feel so restraining all of a sudden, as though he only just realized how small the room is. The bad memories keep surfacing, even when he closes his eyes and tries to pretend he’s anywhere else. It’s a prison of his own making, this bedroom. No bars in the window, no lock keeping him from leaving- but he can’t ever truly leave, can he? Even if he leaves, even if the place were destroyed, even if he moves to the other side of the world, he’ll always be here.

“Running away is futile, and you know it.” Something says.

“You have to face it head-on, even if it might hurt.” Stranger adds.

Basil struggles to speak for a moment, his body shakes as he tries to lay down in bed. “Will the both of you… please be quiet.”

It’s so hard to think straight with these voices constantly talking over him. He closes his eyes and tries to rest. Put the unpleasant thoughts behind him for a moment. But they claw at him. The lake, the tree, the garden shears, a single eye staring at him constantly. Blood. So much blood. Mari’s blood on the floor. Sunny’s blood on his hands. Aubrey hitting him, Kim mocking him, Kel standing by and doing nothing. Years and years of pain, and for what? Nothing. It was all pointless. Less than pointless, in fact. A coverup that never needed to happen. A lie to protect someone who didn’t need protecting.

A lie.

He sits up again and looks around at the suffocating confines of his room. At the books neatly arranged on the bookshelf. At the plants hung from the ceiling like hanging corpses. At all the flowers he still keeps sentimentally in here.

It’s a lie, all of it.

He’s a lie.

“Why hadn’t I seen it sooner?” He says aloud.

“You’re running away again.” Stranger chides.

“No, I’m facing the truth. For so long, I’ve been reluctant to let go of the past. Even now, when I thought I was moving on, I realize now that I was still clinging tight to these memories.”

“You cannot move on by destroying the past.”

The past was nothing but pain and disappointment. Parents who never loved him. Friends who betrayed him. Friends who died. The person he cared about most abandoned him twice now. It can all go to Hell for all he cares. He gets up and moves to the flowers.

Stranger sounds agitated now. “There is still hope, Basil. Your friends, you have to trust-”

“Why should I care about them?” He grabs a flower pot and throws it against the ground. “Why should I care about any of them? They’ve never understood me!” He grabs another flower and smashes it against the floor, watching the dirt and pottery shards fly everywhere.

“You’ve never understood anything.” Something says. “You’ve always simply acted on assumptions.”

“They betrayed me!” Basil shouts as he flips over the entire table of flowers. “They all betrayed me! My parents. Sunny. Aubrey. Kel. All of them.”

“You only believe what you want to believe about them.”

He tips over another table. “Shut up! I don’t want to hear it!”

In a flash he grabs his watering bucket and throws it at one of the hanging plants, but misses. The watering bucket hits the wall and leaves a scratch on the wall before landing on his bed. He turns to the bookshelf, full of useless knowledge on flowers and stupid novels he rarely ever understood.

Basil knocks them all off the shelf, sending them sprawling across the floor. The nightstand by his bed is soon on its side, too, the contents of its small drawer spilling everywhere across the floor. He then gets on his hands and knees and pulls the photo album out from under his bed. His most prized possession, once.

“Nobody wants me. Nobody cares if I live or die. Maybe they never did…” Sunny should have kept the photo album. Kept it and taken it as far away from Basil as possible. He’d be better off with these memories, he was the one who wanted to cherish them so much. A few droplets of tears splash onto the cover as he looks at it.

He had wanted it back so much once, not too long ago, but now…

“They can all just die.”

He drops the photo album onto the floor. Part of him wants to destroy it, or throw it away, but even now he can’t build up the strength to do it.

“Then tell me,” Stranger says. “Why do you still hold onto those photos so dearly?”

“Everything would have been better off without me. None of this would have happened without me there. I should die, too.”

“You don’t really mean that.” Stranger seems to sigh.

Something wraps around him tightly, like the distant memory of a hug twisted into something painful. “Weak. You’ve always been weak. They can all see it, can’t they? That’s why they hate you.”

“You’re still just assuming.” says the Stranger. “You condemn yourself for acting on assumptions, yet you continue to make such assumptions about others.”

Basil puts his hands on his head, the tears flowing freely. His legs wobble and bow. “W-what do I do? What do I do?”

“Tell. Them. Everything.”

He drops to his knees. Tell them? How could he ever tell them? They’d never believe him, not in a million years. That he framed Mari’s suicide because he believed a monster murdered her? That he talks to ghosts and shadow creatures and voices in his head to give him life advice?

But he can’t do this alone. He can’t do anything on his own. Weak, cowardly, stupid. And worst of all, insane. The more he tried to hold onto his friends, the more he hurt them. And the more they hurt him in return.

“Mari… Sunny… somebody please help.”

He lays down on the floor, curling his knees under his chin.

Chapter Text

“I should really head home now.” Cris says, checking her watch. “My dad’s making dinner tonight, and you know how he gets when you make him wait.”

Kel chuckles, he knows her dad well enough to know how serious he takes his grilling. Dad’s trying his best to match their neighbor in his cooking skills, but Kel doubts he’ll be able to do so- not that he’d ever admit that to him.

“Let’s hang out again tomorrow.” Kel says.

“Sure!”

The two wave as Cris departs from the park, leaving Kel alone with Hector sitting at one of the benches. It’s perfect out- hot but overcast, with a gentle breeze to help keep things cool. He’d stay out here for the rest of the evening if he could. Play some basketball with some strangers like usual, perhaps. But he should be heading home soon. Mom is probably going to start making dinner soon, and he doesn’t want her to have to send Hero to retrieve him. Besides, he and Hero will need to talk about the matter of Aubrey, and the sooner the better. Does he already know? Has he spoken to Aubrey at all today? Kel hasn’t seen her since yesterday. And how might Basil be faring? Probably not well, knowing him.

Hopefully he doesn’t do something drastic. Again.

He should definitely talk to Basil soon, too.

Man, he’s got a lot to manage with his friends right now. Mari always made this kind of stuff look super easy, but without her somebody else needs to step up to look after everyone. Hero keeps trying to shoulder this burden himself, but who is there to take care of him ? Kel sighs and leans back on the bench, running a hand through his hair. He’ll talk to Aubrey tomorrow, definitely. He just needs to-

“You free tomorrow?” He hears a familiar voice from the direction of the lake hideout. Aubrey and Kim are there, talking about their plans for the next day. How long have they been at the hangout spot? Kel didn’t see them arrive, but then he was distracted. He gets up and walks over to the two.

“Oh, hey, didn’t realize you guys were here.”

“Hey Kel.” Aubrey says. She seems relaxed but she doesn’t smile at all.

Kim sticks her hands in her pockets and smirks, “Sup, nerd?”

Kel rolls his eyes, “You need to be more original with your jabs, Kim. You’re starting to get a bit stale.”

She laughs ruefully. “I’d love to stay and chat but I oughta be back home for dinner soon.”

Aubrey seems to hesitate for a moment, “I, uh, I should be going, too.”

“Wait.” He puts a hand on her shoulder and gives a hopefully reassuring smile- she might not be so defensive if he approaches this in a relaxed, friendly way. “Think we can talk for a moment? In private, I mean.”

The two girls exchange a reluctant look for a moment before Kim gives Aubrey a brief kiss. Kel averts his eyes awkwardly.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” Aubrey says.

“See ya.”

Once Kim departs the two friends stand in silence for a few moments. She probably already knows why he wants to talk in private, judging by the look on her face. She seems rather… relaxed. She probably already expects what he wants to talk about. Without saying anything, she turns to the trees into the secret hangout spot. Kel nods, and the two wordlessly make their way to the lake hangout spot. He takes a seat at a bench looking out over the lake, and gestures for Aubrey to sit. She complies with a sigh, adjusting her hair a little as she stares off absently towards the lake. Her eyes are her natural brown right now, she hasn’t worn her contacts in a couple days. She looks… more like her old self like that, even with her bright pink hair.

“Hey, I’m curious…” Kel says. “Why do you wear those contacts so much?”

She shrugs, “Because they look nice, I guess. Do I have to have some deep reason for it?”

“Well, I noticed you’re not wearing them now, and you weren’t yesterday either. Guess that just made me curious.”

“Oh, yeah, guess I just forgot them today.” She furls her brows in thought, still gazing off into the distance. Kel follows her gaze and sees her looking at a group of pinwheels set up near the lake, on the opposite side of their usual picnic spot. White, pink, orange, and blue, all clustered together closely. Two others, purple and green, both sat apart from the rest- they were closer together once, Kel remembers. When were they moved?

“I can’t believe those are still there.”

Aubrey smiles a little, “To tell the truth, every time I would come here for the past few years I’d look over at them to see if they were still standing.”

Kel nods. “Were you the one who moved two?”

“No, I think someone else replaced them when they fell.”

The two let these words linger, and Kel watches the green pinwheel. All alone now, pulled away from the others and isolated. How might it feel to be like that? Without friends, with little support. Having to deal with it all by yourself, despite the storms that constantly try to knock you over. It must be so hard to keep standing.

“Let’s just cut to the point.” Aubrey suddenly says. “This is about Basil, isn’t it?”

Kel stays silent for a moment. “I just want to know why.”

“You know exactly why.” She sideeyes him. “Or did you somehow forget that? ”

Oh, of course, she just has to accuse him of being stupid right off the bat. Classic Aubrey. Even now she just can’t help but resort to lashing out when cornered. “If this were just about Basil, you would have done it weeks ago.”

“Maybe I was bored today, and decided to mess with Basil while he was away from home.”

Kel sighs. “Be honest, Aubrey. I can tell something else is wrong. You never do this kinda stuff simply because you’re bored.”

She groans and rubs her eyes. “You’re right. Sorry. It’s just…” She goes quiet, returning to gazing at the pinwheels. “It’s my mom.”

He sits up suddenly, “Your mom?! What did she do to you? Did she-”

“ No , she didn’t do anything to me. Let me just explain before you jump to conclusions, okay?” She glares at him with frustration.

Kel nods and leans back again. “Sorry. Go on.”

“My mom, she’s just so useless .” She clenches her fists. “Can’t even remember to pay the bills these days. She just fucking watches tv, gets drunk, and sleeps on the couch all day. And she expects me to get all her beer and cigarettes for her!”

“But… you’re not old enough to buy those?”

“ You try telling her that!”

Kel goes quiet for a while, thinking about the events of the day. “So that’s what it is, huh? I… think I get it. You’re mad, but you can’t do anything about your mom, so you hurt someone else instead.”

“I suppose you’re right…” She slouches forward with a sigh, her eyes drifting to the ground. “She always does this to me. And she’ll never change.”

“I’m sure that’s not true.” He smiles.

“How would you know? Not like you’ve ever talked to her.”

“I know, I know. It’s just…” Kel lets out a sigh. “I get it, parents can be pretty difficult to deal with sometimes. They can often seem pretty stuck in their ways, with how old they are- but I think even they can change. You just need a little patience with her, I guess.”

Aubrey guffaws, “You really think it’ll be that easy? As if I haven’t been giving her all the patience in the world for years! ”

“Well, I didn’t say it’d be easy. ” He chuckles uncertainly. “I mean, I’ve had some trouble with my mom over the years. Sometimes it seems like she doesn’t even remember I exist, compared to Hero and now Sally. But I try to cut her some slack because I know-”

“Kel!” Aubrey shouts, looking suddenly quite enraged. She stands up, gritting her teeth in frustration. “Don’t make this about you! Your life is nothing like mine.”

“I was just trying to help.”

She sighs and rubs her eyes, “And you failed, as usual.”

Kel stands up. “You think I’m making this all about myself? You’re the one who takes out all her personal issues on other people!”

“Don’t defend him! He ruined our lives, Kel. Why do you feel the need to defend him?”

He puts a hand on her shoulder, but she swats it away. “Does hurting him make you feel better at all? Because it seems to me that you’re not any happier.”

“Don’t get all high and mighty with me!” Aubrey glares daggers at Kel and turns around as if to walk away.

“Where do you think you’re going? We’re not done here!” He grimaces, maybe that was a little too harsh of him to say. “ Please , Aubrey, let me help. I know things have been difficult, but we can still work this out.”

She turns back around, hands balled into fits, “Then you tell me how to fix things. Since you’re so wise and know so much about my life, I’m sure you could come up with a perfect solution.”

Kel grits his teeth and scowls. “Well maybe things would be a little easier for you if you weren’t such a jerk! You almost killed Basil and you still think you can just step all over him without any consequences?”

Aubrey gives him a light shove, just like she had with Basil that day. Fortunately, there’s no water behind Kel for him to fall into. “How many times do I have to tell you that was an accident?”

“And if he hadn’t been saved? If he had died there? Wouldn’t that make things easier for you?”

An uncomfortable silence passes between the two for a moment. Aubrey seems to be considering her next words carefully. “It doesn’t matter what could have happened. What matters is what did happen. Basil… Sunny… they ruined everything! ” Her face is a bright red, and her voice is strained with anger. “Why do you keep trying to act like things can just go back to how they were before?”

“Why do you keep acting like you’re the only person whose suffering matters? Seriously! It’s always about you.”

Aubrey’s anger turns to shock, “What do you mean?”

Kel throws his hands outward. “Oh come on! You know exactly what I mean! Even before we knew the truth you kept acting like your feelings about Mari’s death mattered more than mine. More than Sunny’s feelings even! You just assumed that we all didn’t care!”

“I already apologized for that!”

“An apology means nothing if you just keep doing it!”

She gasps in shock, her hands balled into fists. She looks like she’s trying very hard not to cry. “You… Do you not get it? They killed Mari! Murdered her! Their feelings don’t fucking matter!”

“They’ve already suffered for their mistakes! Are you just going to keep at it until they’re dead?”

“You know I don’t want that!”

“Then when will it be enough?” Aubrey freezes a little, tears welling up in her eyes. Whatever words she tries to form die in her throat before she can vocalize them. Perhaps he went a little too far in his anger. Kel sighs, feeling exhausted all of a sudden. He needs to dial it back a little. “Aubrey, this isn’t just about Basil. Or Sunny. This is about your anger. You can’t just deal with all your feelings by hurting other people. Even if you feel like they deserve it.”

“I… I…” The tears start flowing readily, and she tries to cover her face.

“Aubrey…” Kel takes a step forward.

“Leave me alone!” She turns and runs off in tears. Kel raises hand to try and stop her but she’s out of reach too quickly.

“Wait!” He calls out, but she’s already gone. He should probably go after her but… she won’t listen to him anymore. Why did he think he could talk to her about this on his own? He should have talked to Hero first, but of course he had to rush into this and make things worse. He sits back down and runs a hand through his hair. “Shit, I really messed up this time.”

The days just seem to get worse and worse for Aubrey, and it’s all her own fault. Why did she have to accept Kim’s idea so easily? She should have known better- she did know better. And yet Kim’s evil, beautiful smile always manages to sway her. She runs out of the park and down the street, stopping at the first crossroads. She could turn left and go back to Kim’s embrace but where would that take her? Right back to where she started. Back to that evil smile and the way it gets her to do things she knows she shouldn’t. But where else should she go? Home? Her mom will likely be furious when she returns after being absent so long. Or maybe she’ll cry pathetically and apologize. Or maybe she won’t even notice or care.

She’s not sure which reaction would be worse.

But she can’t stay away from home forever- who would take care of Bun-Bun?

She keeps walking, back home. It’s approaching dinner time, and the shadows stretch out towards the east as she walks. She spares a glance at Basil’s house as she reaches the intersection. Looks like they already cleaned it all up. It’s the first time she can recall ever seeing that green house without any plants around it. Even in her earliest memories, before really getting to know Basil, before it even took that bright green color it is now, it always had flowers around it.

“H-Hi.” Said the blond boy from the flowery house just across the street. He wore a green collar shirt and khaki shorts- even when he was 6, he dressed like that. “I’m Basil.”

“Hi Basil!” The girl in pink said with a broad smile. “I’m Aubrey!”

She turns away from the green house, towards her house. So similar in shape yet so different in character- dirty, beaten, worn down. Trash surrounds the house in the same way flowers once surrounded Basil’s house. Wiping tears from her eyes, she takes a deep breath and enters the house.

Silence.

Mom is on the couch, already asleep. She almost looks peaceful, sprawled out awkwardly with her head on one of the arm rests, matted and dirty blonde hair splayed across her face. She used to be quite pretty, in the old photos she threw out when Aubrey’s dad left, but she’s seen to systematically destroy herself until nothing but this husk remains. Instead of improving herself, she chose simply to blame the world and double down on her self-destructive path.

Aubrey continues on, climbing up into her room as she has a million times before. Bun-Bun is waiting in his little pen as usual, looking happy to see her again.

“At least someone misses me.” She mumbles as she kneels to pet the eager white rabbit. She’s never gotten the chance to show him off to her other friends, as much as part of her would love to see it. If only she didn’t live in a shitty house with a shitty mom, then she could have everyone hang out and watch tv and play with Bun-Bun. Just like they used to do at Sunny’s house.

She’d like to blame her parents for all her misfortune, but…

“When will it be enough?”

Kel was absolutely right. It’s her own fault she’s gotten to this point. Her mom never forced her to take out all her anger at Basil, or ignore her friends’ trauma, or treat Kel so poorly. But what is she supposed to do? Admit these past four years have been a waste? That she’s nothing but a spiteful asshole who can’t handle her feelings and hurts others because of it? That her friends… that Kim has made her worse?

Or maybe she made them all worse.

God, why does Kel have to be so right for once in his life?

Chapter Text

Basil gets up from his bed- he didn’t sleep at all, but he sprawled out on his bed for the entire night, staring up at the clock and watching the hours pass by. Even when sunrise came he stayed in his bed, as if his entire body were paralyzed, until finally his mother knocked on the door and asked if he was up yet. 11:00 AM. A late start to the day.

Too late, perhaps.

He walks to the bathroom, ignoring the words of his mother as she prattles on about something that doesn’t matter. Something about his clothes? Her voice is faint and distant as he shuts the bathroom door behind him.

In the mirror, a Stranger stares back at him. A Stranger wearing his face- or a crude imitation of it, perhaps. Dead, sunken eyes peer back at him from whatever world was visible through that piece of glass. It stands slightly hunched, mouth agape, eyes baggy and tired. Like something dead trying its best to pretend to be alive.

“Look at yourself.” It says. But Basil cannot see himself, only the Stranger. “You’ve fallen so far in only a few days.”

“I was always like this.” Basil says. “I’ve just stopped trying to hide it. It’s far too late for me now.”

“Is it really too late, or are you too scared to try and change yourself?”

“It’s four years too late!” He shouts. “My life ended that day; I’ve just been lying to myself about it.”

The room falls silent. There’s a knock on the bathroom door, but Basil barely notices it. The Stranger glares emotionlessly, but he can feel its frustration and disappointment.

“Why do you even care what happens to me?”

“I am you.” The Stranger says. “The part of you that knows better. The part of you that still clings to hope.”

Basil walks closer to the sink to get a better look at the Stranger, who likewise moves closer to match him. It watches him, waiting for something.

“What hope is there left to cling to? Sunny… he’s abandoned me again. My friends will never forgive me, either.”

“You just have to have faith in them. Would Sunny have called you in the middle of the night if he didn’t care?”

“I…”

A second, louder knock rings through the bathroom. “Basil! Are you okay in there?”

He turns away from the mirror without another word and leaves. Mom stands outside the bathroom, looking incredibly concerned.

“Basil, what’s wrong? You were shouting something in the bathroom…”

“Nothing is wrong.”

“You didn’t bathe at all!”

He’s in the kitchen now, staring at the sink as Mom tries to get his attention. Is this because of the funeral, or the garden, or both? Does he need a friend to talk to? Again her voice fades into the distance as she talks, as though she’s walked into another room. It’s hard to pay attention to what she’s saying when her voice is so faint. Suddenly she grabs his shoulder and shakes him.

“Basil!”

Everything seems to come into focus at once; Mom is staring at him fearfully. What was he just doing? Why is he in the kitchen?

“Mom, I…” He shakes his head and takes a deep breath; this house feels so stifling. “I think I just need some fresh air.”

“You haven’t even eaten.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“You didn’t eat dinner, either.”

She’s right; he hasn’t eaten for nearly an entire day, yet he doesn’t feel any pang of hunger. It’s not the first time he’s felt this way- in fact, it’s something that’s uncomfortably familiar. Not much he can really do about it, eating would probably only hurt.

“I just need a quick walk.” He says. “I’m fine.”

Before he realizes it, he’s already outside the house. How did he move so quickly? The sun feels oppressive today. He pointedly does not look back as he walks across the front yard to the sidewalk- if he sees the outside of his house again, he might break again.

He starts walking- not thinking much of where, just away from here. This house, this family, this life. He needs to get away from all of it.

And maybe never come back.

“You never learn.” Something says as it follows behind him.

“I don’t care.” He keeps walking, his feet guiding him as if on their own down the path he’s traced a thousand times before. The same street he’d walk down to go to Sunny’s house, or the park, or Hobbeez. He barely needs to think of where he’s going; he just lets his feet guide him.

He feels empty-more than empty, in fact. Is he even alive? Or has he been a ghost this entire time without realizing? Maybe if he just accepted that fact, he could finally find peace. That’s usually how it works with ghosts, at least in the stories he’s read.

“You truly have lost it now.” The Stranger mutters. He sighs; even his hallucinations are calling him crazy now.

Maybe he should just go to the lake and finish what Aubrey started.

“Do it.” Says Something, lingering over his shoulder just out of view.

“Don’t listen.”

Now outside the park, he gazes in from just beyond the entrance. The place is a lot quieter than last time he was here; it’s Monday, after all, and most adults are likely at work by now. Kids are probably hanging out at Hobbeez, for the most part. All that leaves are the old homeless people who always mill around the park. Nobody would notice if he disappeared into the hideout and never came out.

It’ll be so easy.

It’ll be a walk in the park.

So why can’t he move forward?

“I won’t let you.” The Stranger says. “You know this is wrong.”

“I know but-”

“Basil?” A familiar voice interrupts, “Who are you talking to?”

He turns- it’s Polly, wearing a wide sun hat similar to one he would often wear as a child. The longer she looks at him, the more fear spreads across her face.

“Polly, I…”

She steps up closer and puts a hand on his shoulder. “Oh dear, you look terrible. Are you wearing the same clothes from yesterday?”

He can do nothing but absently nod as she looks over him, all previous thoughts vanishing under her worried gaze. What was he even doing out here? Wandering around like an idiot, probably looking for all the world like a homeless person.

“What are you doing here?”

“J-just taking a walk.”

“You really shouldn’t be going out like this.” She brushes a hand against his cheek maternally. “Come on, you need to wash up.”

She takes him by the hand and tries to guide him away, but his feet are glued to the ground. He can’t go forward, but he doesn’t want to go back either. Go forwards or backwards, it’s always the same. Nothing will change either way, will it?

“I don’t want to.”

She pauses for a moment, looking into his eyes with concern and curiosity. Understanding flashes across her eyes, and she nods slowly.

“It’s okay, I won’t force you to go home right now then. If it’s not too much, I could let you stay at my house for the day.”

“A-alright. Sure…”

He’s never once been to Polly’s house, though they live close enough together that he can see it across the street from his own house. The exterior is similar to his own house, but it seems like a much cozier place, with light blue walls and a brown roof. He can’t imagine how stressful it must be for her to have to take care of two different houses at the same time. Maybe he should have helped her clean around the house more often whenever he could…

Polly helps him along down the street, holding his hand gently. She doesn’t ask any questions and doesn't try to push him to say anything. She just guides him down the sidewalk without any judgement or demands. As they pass by his house, she very knowingly points to her own house so he won’t turn and look at his own barren house.

Once inside she sits him down on the couch. “Let me at least call your parents so they know you’re okay.”

He nods and lets himself sink into the comfortable couch as she grabs the phone near the TV. Just as the outside, the inside in many ways resembles his own house. The living room and kitchen are conjoined, without any walls separating them. There’s only one doorway, likely leading to a hallway with a bathroom and two bedrooms. Or, probably only one bedroom, considering Polly only needs one bedroom.

“Alright. Thank you, sir. Have a good day.” Polly hangs up the phone and moves to sit on the couch next to Basil. “You should really get in the shower and wash up a bit. I’ll make you something to eat and put those clothes in the wash for you.”

“I-I…” He trails off. What is he supposed to say? That there’s a monster in the mirror where his reflection should be?

She smiles. “When you’re all cleaned up, we can talk about it. Okay?”

He nods. The Stranger is likely waiting for him in the mirror but… he can’t run away this time. Polly first cleans the bathroom up a little before letting him in with a clean towel, and she discreetly takes his dirty clothes through a barely open door to put in the wash while he bathes. The bathroom looks similar to his own, as with the rest of the house. He looks in the mirror and once again sees the Stranger and Something.

“You’re not running away this time?” The Stranger asks.

“Where would I even go?”

“Anywhere other than here.” Something says.

“Well… I’m not going to be running off without clothes.”

He turns to the shower bath and turns on the shower faucet. Normally, he prefers a relaxing bath. It gives him more time to think, but right now he’d rather think about his situation as little as possible.

He really did think about it, didn’t he? Heck, he had actually tried, but the Stranger had stopped him. It’s okay now, though. He’s safe with Polly looking after him.

“It’s temporary.” Something says. “She’ll leave you eventually. When she stops being paid. After all, it’s just a job for her.”

“Would she really have let you into her home like this if it was only a job?” the Stranger says.

He can’t think of anything more to say, so he stays quiet and rushes through the steps of showering as quickly as possible. Once he’s done he dries off thoroughly Polly passes him some slightly too large clothes to wear until the ones he had on earlier are dried.

“Is that better?” She asks as she sits him down to eat. One of his grandmother’s recipes, no doubt.

“A little…” He stares down at his plate, feeling suddenly exhausted.

“I should have talked to you sooner.” Polly says after a moment. “I guess… I hoped your parents could step up for once and help, but…”

“They’ve only made things worse.”

“I’m sorry.” Basil glances up at her, her face downturned and full of guilt. She always puts everything on her own shoulders like this. Before the truth came out, she often assumed that any problems he was having were entirely her own fault. He certainly didn’t help with how much he often avoided talking about his problems.

“I-It’s okay.” They sit in silence for a moment as he eats. “Polly, I don’t know what to do. Sometimes it feels like there’s no hope for me in this life. I was so ready to run away with my parents and start a new life, but now I’m not even sure if that would fix anything.”

Polly listens and nods along. She’s clearly worried, maybe she’s not sure what exactly to say.

“It’s just,” Basil continues. “I waited so long for Sunny to return and save me. It’s what kept me sane for years. And now… now he has saved me, but now there’s nobody out there I can pin all my hopes on.”

“I suppose it would be too easy for me to just say ‘don’t pin all your hopes on a single person like that’, but you already know that.” She sighs. “All you can really do right now is hold onto the promise that things will get better someday.”

“Do you really think that’s possible? Even after everything I’ve done?”

She looks away for a moment, eyes downcast to the ground. “We have to hope.”

“Yeah, I suppose.”

“And no matter what happens, I’ll be there to support you. I promise.”

He desperately wants to believe her, but…

He sighs and keeps eating. At least he’s still alive.

After eating he gets settled on the couch- Polly sits down with him, she says she has nothing else really to do today but Basil gets the feeling she’s probably putting off her housework to keep a close eye on him. There isn’t much on tv on a Monday afternoon, unfortunately, so he mostly browses channels aimlessly.

“Basil,” Polly speaks up after a while of them sitting in silence. “If you don’t mind me asking, have you told your parents anything?”

“No.”

She nods. “Are you… afraid of them?”

“Y-Yes.” He lets out a sigh, like a weight has just been lifted. Yes. He’s afraid of his parents. He’s wanted to say it for so long yet he’s never truly had the courage to admit it. They terrify him, in fact. “I’m afraid because… because what if they just don’t listen? What if they think I’m just making it all up? Or worse, what if they despise me for what I’ve done?”

Polly puts a hand on his shoulder gently. “I understand your fears, but it seems to be that you need to tell them- not for their sake, but for your own peace of mind.”

She might be right, but… easier said than done. He sits in silence for a minute, pondering her words. Maybe telling them would make things easier, even if they hate him he’ll no longer have to live in fear of the possibility. “Hey, Polly. What’s your relationship with your parents like?”

She looks a bit surprised by the question at first. “I- Well- To be honest, they aren’t much better than yours.”

“I-I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked.”

“It’s fine, it's fine. It’s just, well, I don’t really talk about it much.” She leans forward with a sigh, her countenance turning somber and thoughtful. “I never seemed to be able to make them happy. No matter how obedient I was, or how well I did in school, they always found something to criticize me for. To tell the truth I… haven’t talked to them in a few years.”

Basil smiles sadly. “I-I guess we’re more similar than we seem.”

“Heh, yeah. Maybe that’s why I was blind to what was really wrong with you. It didn’t occur to me that there might be something other than your parents bothering you.”

“It’s alright, I understand.”

The two go quiet for a moment; Polly seems to consider her next words very carefully. “Whatever your parents do, I want you to know that I’ll be here for you.”

He nods. “C-Can we talk about something else? A little distraction would be nice right now.”

Polly smiles, “Sure.”

Chapter Text

“And then she ran away.” Kel says with a sigh as he stares at his dinner with disinterest. The two sit in the living room, working over what’s left of dinner from a few nights ago. Mom and dad are out for the night, and Hero has already cooked recently so they decided to just settle for what they already have. “I really screwed up, I know.”

Hero stabs at dinner as he thinks about everything his brother had just told him. So Aubrey and him had a fight earlier in the day, and she ran off crying. He wishes he was shocked by that outcome but it feels like it was expected. “You should have spoken to me first.”

“I know, I know. I was going to, but then she was right there in front of me already and I thought, like, I need to take this chance right now .”

Hero sighs. Kel’s impulsiveness isn’t very surprising, but that doesn’t detract from the disappointment. “What’s done is done. You did what you thought was right in the moment, even if it backfired.”

“Do you think we should go talk to her now?”

“Er, maybe not right now. It’s late, and she probably isn’t in a very receptive state right now.”

Kel sighs. “Alright. Oh, did you see Basil at all today?”

“No. You?”

“No, I only heard about what happened from Cris.”

“I see…” That’s probably not a good sign. What might Basil be up to? He might not have left his house at all today. “We should probably pay him a visit, too.”

“Agreed. It’ll be just like last time except, well, no Sunny.”

“And no photo album to help.”

The two sit for a moment in silence, mulling over this predicament. Kel’s instincts were absolutely right about Aubrey’s motives, at least, he just misspoke without realizing. She mistook his empathy for trying to make it all about himself, so what else could they do to get through to her?

“I think I have an idea.” Kel says. “But, uh, I don’t think Mom and Dad are going to like it.”

Hero raises an eyebrow, “And what might that be?”

“Well…”

The next day Kel is up a bit earlier than his usual, and he’s quite energetic and eager to get out. Mom tries to ask why he seems so eager today, but as usual he’s extremely evasive with her. Hero can’t exactly blame him for his feelings towards their parents, especially Mom, but it’s still a bit sad to see him be so closed off with them.

“You seem pretty excited for something so serious.” Hero says as he washes the dishes.

“Well, I had a good dream, and I guess I just feel like things are gonna turn out well today.”

“What was the dream about?”

Kel scratches his chin and things for a moment. “I can’t really remember, honestly. I think I was talking with Mari, but I can’t remember what we were talking about.” He grins.

Hero smiles back, but struggles to reflect his brother’s enthusiasm. Kel once said that he always has a good day after he dreams about Mari. Hero wishes he could say the same. “If all goes well, maybe we should pay her a visit later today.”

“All of us together? Sure! You gonna bring more flowers?”

“I didn’t bring any last time, so I probably should.”

Kel refills Hector’s food bowl, something he forgot to do yesterday, and the two head out for Aubrey’s house. The new neighbors in Sunny’s old house seem to be nearly settled in. Maybe they should introduce themselves soon, like they had when Sunny and Mari’s family moved in so long ago. They themselves had only moved into the neighborhood a few years prior, and their parents were eager to see kids around Hero and Kel’s age right next door.

“What gift do you think we should give the new neighbors?” Hero muses aloud as they walk down the sidewalk past Cris’ house. “I remember dad gave Sunny’s family a cactus when they moved in, but it’d be a bit lazy to do the same thing twice wouldn’t it?”

Kel shrugs. “I guess. Why are you asking right now, though?”

“I mean the neighbors seem nearly settled, we should probably introduce ourselves to them.”

“I wonder what they’re like?”

“I guess we’ll see…” He glances back at the house receding slowly behind them. “They must be a pretty reclusive bunch, I wonder if Mom and Dad have talked to them at all.”

Hero shrugs.

Soon the two stand once again outside Aubrey’s house, in a scenario not too different from one they were in only a month ago. Her other friends are nowhere to be found this time, unfortunately. They probably don’t realize anything is wrong just yet.

“So should we just let ourselves in again?” Kel scratches his head a little. “Not like they’ll answer.”

“Usually you’d just rush in immediately.” Hero says.

“Well, don’t wanna repeat yesterday.”

He nods in agreement before stepping up to the door and knocking. Might as well try, even if nobody-

The door opens.

Aubrey’s mom peers through the doorway, looking to all the world like a walking corpse. Her hair is matted and dirty, her eyes are sunken and empty, her clothes are filthy. She barely looks related to her own daughter.

“You Aubrey’s friends?”

“Yeah.” Hero says. “We’re, uh, here to see her. Ma’am.”

“Course you are, why else would you be here?”

“Is she home right now?” Kel says, standing just behind Hero a little too close for comfort.

“She was gone for a while but she showed up last night and went into her room. Hasn’t been out since.”

“Is it okay if we come inside?” Hero smiles charismatically, or at least he hopes he is.

Aubrey’s Mom scoffs. “Well, you already let yourselves in last time. I don’t see how I could stop you now.” Oof, she remembers that? She seemed totally tapped out when they last showed up.

The house is just as bad as it was last time the brothers stopped by. Maybe even a little worse, now that he looks closely at all the trash. Does Aubrey clean at all? Maybe she’s too stubborn to clean up her mom’s messes.

“Make yourselves at home.” Her mom says sardonically as she takes up her spot on the couch again.

They maneuver past all the strewn trash and make it to the hallway where the attic entrance resides. The ladder has been drawn up and the door closed.

“This would be a lot easier if we could knock.” Kel murmurs.

Hero grimaces, “She probably won’t be too happy with us barging in.”

His brother shrugs and pulls on the cord, allowing them to lower the ladder. Hero climbs up first, scanning the bedroom at the top of the ladder before pulling himself in entirely.

“Hero, I know it’s you.” Aubrey says. She lays on her bed, staring vacantly at the ceiling. “My mom never even bothers to check on me.”

“Aubrey, Kel told me about what happened yesterday and-”

“You’re here to set things right, as usual?” She doesn’t bother looking at the two, just keeps staring at the ceiling. She doesn’t sound angry, just tired. So tired.

“I just want to see if you’re okay.”

“I’m not. There, done.”

Kel looks perturbed, “A-Aubrey. I’m sorry I said everything I did yesterday.” He walks up beside her bed, but she turns to face away from him.

“What’s there to apologize for? You were right. I was just in denial about it.”

He stammers for a moment before Aubrey suddenly shifts and sits up in her bed.

“What? No backtracking half-apology? No pretending you didn’t mean any of it? You were right, don’t try to undermine that in some fake attempt to make me feel better.” She sighs. “All I ever do is hurt people and pretend that I’m the victim. Every time I try to get better I just get worse because there’s no way out of this shitty excuse for a life. And there’s nothing either of you can do to change that, unless you can somehow fix my mom’s drug addiction and whatever else is wrong with her brain.”

Hero steps up by the bed, Aubrey glances over but averts her eyes from him. “So are you just going to hide in here forever? Cut yourself off so you never hurt anyone, and nobody else can ever hurt you?”

“Maybe. I don’t fucking know.”

He puts a hand on her shoulder and, to his surprise, she doesn’t resist. “It’s true that we can’t really help fix your problems, but that doesn’t mean you or we should give up on you.”

“Yeah!” Kel says. “Look, I’m sorry I made it seem like I was downplaying how bad you have it. I know things are super rough for you, and there’s nothing we can really do about that right now, but we’re here for you. Always.”

She smiles, but there’s little joy in it. “You’re both too good for me. I don’t deserve to be coddled and cared for like this. I’m just a bully, looking for excuses to hurt people while making myself out to be the victim.”

“Hiding in your room isn’t going to help.” Hero says.

“I know! I just…” She rubs her forehead and lets out a deep sigh. “I just get so fuckin pissed off at the world and I feel like I have no outlet for it except to make Basil’s life worse. It doesn’t help that Kim seems to always know exactly what buttons to press to get me to agree to her plans.”

“It was her idea?” Kel says.

“Yeah. But, don’t pretend she’s the only one at fault. I still wanted to hurt him, even though I knew it was wrong.”

“Maybe…” Hero pauses for a moment, considering his words. “Maybe you should be more upfront with her about all of this. She clearly cares about you a lot, I’m sure she’ll understand if you explain how you feel to her.”

“I’m not sure she’ll really get it. Basil did something bad, so he should be punished- that’s all she sees. Especially after I told her about what happened.”

“Why did you tell her?” Kel puts his hands in his pockets and frowns. “You should have at least informed us first.”

“I agree. This might sound a bit callous, but what happened with Mari is none of her business. We shouldn’t be so liberal with something like that.”

“So you just expect us to take the truth to our graves?!” Aubrey snaps.

Hero raises his hands apologetically. “No no no. I just mean, well, I don’t think right now is a good time to put us all into even worse trouble than now.”

“Yeah, and it’s not like Kim even really knew Mari.” Kel adds. “It feels wrong to let her butt into such a personal matter.”

“I guess you’re right. I… I’ll see what I can do.”

The brothers share a smile between them, now was the time for their plan. Kel steps forward. “Aubrey, would it be okay if you, uh, stayed the night with us?”

She looks surprised for a moment, “A-Are you sure you have room?”

“You can sleep on the couch, just like when we slept over at Basil’s.” Hero says. “Mom might make a fuss over it but I think she’ll warm up to having you around the house again pretty quickly.”

“Yeah!”

Aubrey relaxes her shoulders and smiles. “That… would be nice. I just wish I wasn’t leaving Bun-Bun alone so often.”

Kel looks over to Hero, “You think Hector would get along with him?”

Hero grimaces, “Eehh, I wouldn’t risk it just yet.”

She sighs and stands up. “Ah well, I’ll just pack up a few things first. Should we stop by Basil’s house first? I should apologize.”

“Maybe we should wait and talk to Kim about this first.” Kel says. “I mean, it doesn’t feel like an apology would work unless she apologizes, too.”

“I don’t like the idea of putting it off but I agree.” Hero says. “Kim needs to apologize this time, too. Should we go see her now?”

Aubrey shakes her head. “I don’t think I’m ready just yet for that. And… I’d prefer it just be me talking to her.”

The brothers agree and help her pack a few things- they even agree to let her bring some dirty clothes so she can use their washing machine, since her’s has recently been having problems. Hopefully Mom and Dad don’t complain too much about it- they’ll surely make demands of Hero to make up for this, but he won’t mind. It’ll be worth it to help Aubrey out. Once ready, Aubrey makes sure that Bun-Bun’s well stocked on food and gives him a pet before the three climb back down the ladder. As they head out, Aubrey’s mom looks over at the three impassively.

“Heading out for the day again?”

“Yeah.” Aubrey says.

“Have fun…”

The three head out but Hero stops Aubrey outside, “Hey, do you think you’d be willing to visit Mari before we go to our house?”

Aubrey pauses for a moment. “I… I suppose. I haven’t gone in a few days.”

“You still wanna get some flowers first, Hero?”

“Sure, we can take a detour to get some.”

The three quickly stop by Fix-It and buy flowers before heading back around to the church. Hero wonders if he should have gotten flowers earlier, but it would probably have been awkward to walk into Aubrey’s house with a bouquet of flowers- especially if she had said no to this. Church is empty today, save the priest and a few lone people here to pray and collect their thoughts. They quietly move past them, one or two people glancing up at Aubrey warily as she passes. Probably because of that incident last month…

They exit into the cemetery in the back, none except the gravekeeper here as usual. Wordlessly they move to the same spot as always. To Mari’s resting place. Hero sets the flowers down before the tombstone.

“Hey, Mari.” He says after a moment. “I got Kel and Aubrey with me, like I promised. Things haven’t really been going well recently but, well, I guess that’s not surprising.”

He feels Kel put a hand on his shoulder. “Don’t be so down, things are looking up!”

“Yeah.” Aubrey smiles sadly as she kneels in front of the headstone. “Mari, I know I’ve been pretty shitty these past few years, using your death as an excuse to hurt others. I hope you’re able to forgive that.”

“If anyone can, I’m sure it’s her.” Hero says.

“You’re right.” She lets out a deep sigh. “I wonder if she’d ever forgive them?”

“I… think so.” Kel says a bit quietly.

The three fall into silence, all probably thinking the same question- if she might be able to forgive, can they? Kel, at least, already seems to want to do so, and Aubrey’s crisis might lead her to the same conclusion. But what about Hero? Can he ever truly forgive the people who took his true love from him? Even if she herself might forgive them for it? He keeps asking himself but he still can’t seem to come to an answer, perhaps the other two can help push him to make a decision.

“I wonder if the five of us will ever be here together.” Kel muses aloud.

“That would be nice.” Aubrey says. “Maybe we could have a picnic here again. Everyone could bring something.”

Hero nods, “Yeah, I could make a nice big lunch for everyone.”

“We could all sit around and pass the time looking at the clouds while chatting about whatever.” Kel says wistfully. “And Basil could get Mari all her favorite flowers.”

“And maybe you could bake us all cookies, just like when he used to have picnics.” Aubrey adds.

“Oh no, I could never top Mari’s cookies.”

“Nonsense.” Kel smiles. “You always said hers had more love baked into them, but I think you’ve got more than enough to match hers!”

“Ya, Hero. We wouldn’t be here without that.”

Hero feels himself tearing up a little and wipes his eyes. “Thanks, guys. I think I really needed to hear that right now.”

“I’m feeling a group hug!” Kel says, throwing his arms out. Aubrey rolls her eyes but this time seems in agreement with him as the two embrace Hero together. Maybe someday they all can get together and celebrate Mari’s life together, but even if the rifts with Sunny and Basil are never mended, he’ll at least always have these two here with him. Perhaps that can be enough.

Chapter Text

Later in the evening, Basil finds himself sitting at the dinner table with Polly and Dylan, eating a familiar meal from his grandmother’s recipes. She was surely trying to cheer him up by making him something familiar but in this situation it feels somehow… wrong. Like a stranger wearing your own face. It’s not her fault or anything, and he appreciates the effort she’s made to ensure he’s comfortable, but the feeling of wrongness still permeates the whole situation.

A house, similar to his yet different. A familiar face and a stranger’s face at the table together. And a familiar meal between them.

“How is it?” Polly asks after a while of eating in silence. The table only has two chairs normally, so the two needed to pull out a lawn chair for him to sit on as he ate- it’s not very comfortable.

“Good as always.” Basil says.

“Mhm.” Dylan nods in agreement. Ever since he got home from work, it’s often felt like Polly has been paying more attention to him than Basil- asking him how his day went, if he’d like this dish for dinner, if he wants to watch a movie later.

She smiles, “You know, it’s nice to finally sit down for a meal with my two favorite people.”

Basil lightly chuckles, glancing over at Dylan uncertainly. He’s so important to Polly and yet this is only the second time they’ve barely ever met. Maybe one or two times at his job, but yesterday was really the first time they’ve seen each other outside of that setting. He doesn’t know what to say, and clearly neither does Dylan.

At the very least, he doesn’t want them asking about his personal life right now. Maybe he should get them talking about themselves.

“So how did you two meet?” He says.

Polly looks a bit surprised. “Oh, well, uh. It was about six years ago…” From there the two go into a long personal tale, one picking up the story whenever the other stops or struggles to remember a detail. They seem like a good match, as he listens to them talk as much with each other about the events of the past few years as they do explain it to him. It’s a pleasant story- a chance meeting, an awkward first date, when they moved in together. It almost takes Basil’s mind off his own troubles, just for a moment, but his mind wanders to his own lack of lovelife. He’s never found a girl who feels quite right for him, even if he was in the right headspace for dating- even when they share interests, he’s never really felt anything special for them. What does it even feel like to be in love, at that?

“Uh, I know this is a weird question but… how do you know if you’re in love?”

The two adults go a bit quiet for a moment.

“Well, it’s hard to explain, really.” Dylan says. “It’s like, uh, it’s like there’s something missing inside you, I guess. And that other person is that thing?”

Polly adds, “Personally I would say it’s more of a feeling of comfort when you’re with them. You feel like you can be honest with them in a way you never are with anyone else.”

“I… I think I understand.”

“Is there anyone specifically you’re thinking about?” Dylan asks.

Sunny.

“I’m not sure, to be honest.” He sighs. “I guess it’s just hard for me to understand my own feelings right now. There’s someone out there who is very important to me…” Sunny. “But I’m not sure it’s quite right to say that it’s love love.”

It’s so hard for him to think clearly about Sunny- sometimes it feels like he’s so perfect that none of the mistakes could have been his fault, other times it feels like it’s all his fault. He abandoned Basil, but he saved him. He left, but he forgave. Even after losing an eye he forgave.

Polly tilts her head curiously. “Oh? Would you mind telling us more?”

“I don’t think I wanna talk about it right now.” The two exchange a look for a moment- does she know what he means? Who he might be thinking about? What would she think if she knew? She doesn’t say anything, only nods understandingly and goes back to eating.

Dylan smiles. “It’s alright, I understand you wouldn’t want to bare your soul to someone you practically just met.”

“Yeah, I suppose.” He looks back down at his dinner, the conflicting feelings still rolling around his mind. Is it even possible for him to love Sunny in that way? To love another boy the way most boys would love a girl?

Is it possible for him to be…

To be…

To be gay?

The word drags up countless others in his mind- all the jeers and insults his classmates have leveled at him for years now. The words of adults about how such things are immoral, sinful, evil even. But he’s already done so much worse, hasn’t he? They both have, and perhaps nobody can ever understand the weight of their mistakes other than each other. Perhaps nobody else could ever truly love him, knowing what he’s done.

No. No no. That can’t be true. It would be a curse on both of them to force them into such a situation only because he thinks nobody else will love him. Sunny deserves so much more than that. Basil, too.

Perhaps it’ll just take time, and healing, for them to be able to be together.

“You done eating?” Dylan asks, noticing Basil mostly staring vacantly at his half-finished dinner.

“I guess.” He says, suddenly not feeling hungry.

With dinner done the two adults clean up the dishes, putting leftovers away into a container for another day. As Dylan does the dishes and thinks aloud about what movie they might want to watch tonight, Polly pulls Basil aside to talk.

“Is there anything you want to talk about right now? I know you’re going through a lot, and I just want to help.”

“I-Is this about what I said earlier?”

“Basil, you know I’m worried about you.” She puts a hand on his shoulder. “If there’s anything bothering you, anything at all, I’ll always listen.”

“It was nothing, Polly.” He looks down. “I’m not sure why I even said any of that, really.”

“Basil, are you in love with Sunny?”

The question hits him like a hammer to the face. It’s what he’s been asking himself, of course, but to hear someone else ask it so bluntly puts a whole new weight on it. “I… I don’t know. He-He’s the kindest, sweetest, loveliest person I’ve ever met, even despite the bad things he’s done these past few years but… is it wrong for me to feel that way? Is it wrong for me to love him?”

Polly puts a hand on his chin and gently guides him to look back at her. She smiles with infinite love and kindness. “Oh Basil, dear. I know the two of you have been through so much together, but I don’t think it’s wrong to feel that way.”

“Really?”

“I only knew him briefly before he moved away, but Sunny is an extraordinary boy. He saved your life, and he helped so many others in only three days.”

He did, she’s right. Even he’s heard others talk about all the nice things Sunny did over the mere three days he was out and about before moving. Everyone loves him, everyone. How could someone like Basil ever earn his love?

“But I mean, I’ve hurt him so much- and he’s done the same to me.”

“And those wounds will heal, just give it time and don’t try to rush it.”

“B-b-but we’re boys…” He stammers. “Isn’t it wrong for us to feel that way about each other? That’s what everyone has always told me.”

Polly runs a hand through his short hair and pulls him into a warm, almost maternal embrace. “It’s true that people will try to make you feel wrong for having these feelings but, trust me, you’re not.”

With that, it feels like a weight has been lifted from his shoulders- one he never even fully realized was there. Yes, he loves Sunny. It feels so relieving to finally accept that- even if they can’t be together now, or any time soon. He even feels some tears roll down his cheeks as he rests his head on Polly’s shoulder.

“Thank you. Thank you.”

She gives him a pat on the back, “No matter what happens, I’ll always be here for you, okay?”

He tightens his embrace a little. “Thank you.”

After drying his tears the night goes on as normal, the three sitting down for a much more family-friendly movie than the one he saw with his parents. Polly puts an arm around him as they watch and he feels himself relax into her embrace- is this what Sunny felt when he was with Mari? Not quite the same as a mother’s love, but close. He almost falls asleep a few times, as the exhaustion of the day slowly finally catches up to him. Once the movie is over she grabs a blanket and pillow from storage and sets up a spot for him to sleep on the couch. It’s not that late, but she thinks he could benefit from getting to bed early tonight to make up for his clearly terrible rest last night.

“Is there anything else you need?” Polly asks. “Anything at all?”

He yawns, already laying down. “I know it’s silly but… you think you could tuck me in? Just this once.”

She smiles, “Alright, just this once.” She takes the blanket and deftly pulls it up to cover him, then ruffles his hair a little. “Good night, Basil. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Good night.”

The last place Aubrey expected to be staying the night was Kel and Hero’s house but, well, here she is now following the two brothers in. She’s been inside a few times before, of course, but to sleep over? The first home resident to greet them on entering is Hector, who bolts up from his dog bed the moment he hears the door opening to greet them- he’s gotten larger than when they were kids, but still a fairly small dog. Kel gets on his knees and pets him vigorously as Hero takes up the burden of carrying the stuff Aubrey packed.

“Make yourself at home.”

The basic layout of the house is the exact same as Sunny’s old house just next door, as is common for such houses. Dog and baby toys lay strewn across the floor haphazardly, and it’s a bit hard to tell what’s for the dog and what’s for the baby in some cases.

Kel cups his hands and shouts, “Mom! Dad! Aubrey is here!”

Kel’s mother is the first to come in from the kitchen, arms crossed in front of her. Her short and chubby figure strikes a great contrast with her two tall and athletic sons, but Aubrey can see a bit of similarity with Kel in her face.

“Really?” She says incredulously. “Why do you two keep inviting over guests without telling us in advance? I understood it with Sunny since it was a surprise for everyone that he visited but this is the fourth time this month you’ve brought someone over unannounced.”

The two brothers chuckle awkwardly as she turns her gaze to Aubrey. She’s probably a decade older than Aubrey’s own mom, but she looks a bit younger- probably more because of her mom’s lack of self-care than anything else.

“But I am happy to see you here, Aubrey. Really. It’s always so nice to see Kel spending time with his old friends again.” She lightly squeezes Aubrey’s arm. “Oh my, you seem even skinnier than last time you were here. Have you had anything good to eat recently?”

“Not since a few days ago.”

“I’ll make something for you, then.” She rushes back into the kitchen again immediately.

“She really likes you.” Kel says, a bit embarrassed. He complains a lot about her, and Aubrey is sure his complaints aren’t unfounded, but she’s always seemed very doting on all his friends who come by.

“I can tell.” She looks around the living room a little. “So, where should I put my stuff?”

“We can handle it.” Hero says. “Just get settled right now.”

The two boys take her stuff and disappear upstairs, letting Aubrey settle in on the couch and browse channels on TV, while Hector jumps up and takes up a spot next to her. As much as she wants to relax, her mind lingers on the past events of the week, and the matter of Kim. Kel and Hero can never really understand the relationship the two girls have with each other, and how hard it is for Aubrey to deny someone like her. She had been there for her when nobody else was, giving her support and comfort after years of being alone. And, sure, looking back her feelings of isolation were at least in part caused by her own self-centered view on Mari’s death, but that doesn’t change how it felt in the moment.

Why does Kim always have to be so tough and unforgiving? If she just let people see how sweet she really is, they wouldn’t have any of these problems. Aubrey sinks into the couch as she recalls the warmth in the girl’s embrace, the joyous feelings they shared together in their most intimate moments.

The two brothers come walking back into the living room, taking up spots on the couch on either side of Aubrey and Hector.

“You alright?” Hero asks.

“I’m fine.” She turns her gaze over to Kel. “Kel, have you ever dated before?”

Kel blushes a little with embarrassment, “I er well, there was that one time last year when a girl in my math class asked me out.”

“How’d that go?”

“Yeah.” Hero chimes in, “How did that go? You never told me anything about it.”

Kel scratches his head, “To be honest, it turned out she just despised Orange Joe. She couldn’t even bear to watch me drink it and argued with me about it for a while before leaving.”

Aubrey laughs, “Really? You had your date ruined by fucking Orange Joe? ”

“I mean, even if it didn't happen I don’t think she was really my type.”

“Still..” Hero says while stifling a chuckle, “I can see why you didn’t tell me when it happened.”

“Why’d you wanna know so badly?” Kel nudges Aubrey a little.

She sits up a bit, her face turning contemplative. “Well, I just wanted to know if you’ve ever really known what it feels like to be in love. I mean, really in love, not just agreeing to a date with someone you barely know because she’s hot or whatever.”

Kel and Hero both go quiet for a while. Hero looks somber, probably thinking about Mari. Kel looks contemplative, and Aubrey wonders if he’s thinking of anyone in particular.

“Is this about Kim?” Hero says after a moment.

“Yeah.” She sighs. “It’s just, it’s so hard for me to explain without you really understanding how I feel- how she makes me feel.”

“You love her?” Kel says.

“More than anyone else in the world, honestly.”

Hero nods understandingly. “That’s why you agreed to her idea, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, it’s just… I’d do anything for her sake, even when I know it’s wrong.”

The brothers both give thoughtful looks before the conversation is interrupted by their mother entering the room again with sandwiches.

“I took some leftover chicken and made chicken salad sandwiches for you three. Enjoy!”

“Thanks mom.” Hero and Kel say together.

“Thanks.” Once she leaves the room again Aubrey lets out a sigh. “Let’s talk about this more later, alright?”

“If that’s what you want.” Hero says.

The three turn on a random show and eat in relative peace, though Hector repeatedly tries to take some of Aubrey’s sandwich- it’d be more annoying if he wasn’t such a cute little guy. It’s honestly a pleasant day for her overall, spending it with two of her oldest friends- days like this feel almost like how things used to be, even if only half the original group is here. Kel might be a total dunce at times, and Hero might be a bit boring, but there’s a certain comfort she feels just hanging out with the two of them like this.

Is this what it’s like to have a family who cares about you?

After a while of this, suddenly Kel sits up straight. “Wait, Aubrey, I just had a thought.”

“Remarkable, I never thought you’d be able to do it.”

Hero lightly nudges her with his elbow for that remark, but Kel himself doesn’t seem phased by it. “Remember what you said earlier about Kim? That she makes you willing to do bad things, even when you know they’re wrong.”

Aubrey raises an eyebrow, “Yeah, what about it?”

“What if that’s what Basil was feeling… four years ago… What if he did all of that because he felt the same way about Sunny that you do about Kim?”

Aubrey guffaws, “Are you sure you were thinking at all there before you said that?”

Hero nudges her a bit, “Aubrey…” Yeah, shit, probably a bit too rude.

“I know it sounds ridiculous but like, hear me out for a moment. We’ve spent weeks trying to think about an adequate explanation for why he helped Sunny do… what they did back then. And so far nothing really completely makes sense.”

“Yeah, but how does that prove your point?” Hero says.

“It doesn’t, I know, but I was just thinking about the two and, well, looking back don’t you think it’s weird how close they were?”

“They were best friends, Kel, of course they were close.” Aubrey moans.

“Well, did Sunny ever hold hands with you? He never did it with me, but he did with Basil.”

“Maybe when we were very young, but…”

Hero shakes his head. “I don’t think that’s enough to come to such a conclusion.”

“Yeah, I think you’re really reaching with this, Kel.”

Kel groans, “C’mon guys, you really can’t see it? What about how many photos of Sunny there were in the photo album? He barely took any photos of anyone’s birthdays other than Sunny’s.”

“Kel, that’s enough.” Hero sighs. “I’d rather we not sit around speculating on people’s love life like that.”

Kel looks a bit deflated but nods understandingly. Aubrey can’t blame him for the speculation, of course- the question of why Basil did what he did has been on their minds for a while now, with nothing quite satisfying.

But maybe Kel’s onto something?

It’s nothing definitive, of course, but he’s absolutely right- Basil and Sunny were always extremely close. Even now, after Mari’s death, four years apart, and Sunny losing an eye, the two were holding hands when they were last together leaving the hospital. Still, it does not fully explain why exactly the two decided that covering up Mari’s death was necessary. It’s almost like they were afraid of something…

But what?

Still, Kel’s idea is something she can’t just write off. If it was true, what does that mean about Basil? That he’d do something so fucked up for someone he loves?

It’d mean that he and Aubrey are the same. Just two idiots in love.

Chapter Text

For the first time in a while, Basil sleeps peacefully through the night. No nightmares, no rolling around sleeplessly in bed. He still wakes up a lot later than he’s used to, judging by how bright it is outside, but that’s probably because he had been going on over 24 hours without sleep by that point. Polly is already up and about when he wakes up, and she’s quick to pause her household chores to greet him.

“Did I wake you up?”

“No, you didn’t” He sits up and stretches his arms out with a very loud yawn. “Good morning. What time is it?”

“Just past noon.” She pats him on the head. “I thought to wake you up for breakfast, but you looked so comfortable that I didn’t want to disturb you.”

“Thanks.”

Her face turns serious, “Your parents are probably going to stop by soon to pick you up… you should probably wash up.”

“Can’t you say no?”

“That would be kidnapping, Basil.”

“Can’t I say no, then?”

She pauses and reflects for a second, “I don’t think that will help at all. You can’t solve this by running away.”

She’s right, unfortunately. Hiding and refusing to go home won’t actually solve any problems, even if he’d prefer to stay here. He frowns and gets up to go to the bathroom. There the Stranger again waits. “After all that, things are just going to return to how they were before,” He says, disappointment bleeding through each word. “Aren’t you going to do something about it?”

“Like what?” Basil sighs, “I knew this would happen, even if I don’t want it.”

“You’re giving up too easily, as usual. You have the power to change things, if you’re just willing to take a risk.”

“How do you know that?”

“Basil. I’m you. I know everything you know. I know everything about you. And I know you can do something about this, if you only put your foot down for once.”

He’s right, absolutely right. He needs to finally tell his parents exactly how he feels- force them to care about him enough to stay, or at least not bail on him the moment it’s convenient for them. He looks down once more at his arms- the old scars are there as always, subtle enough that few ever notice them. Could that be enough proof? No, they haven’t even bothered to look at his arms enough to see them. Maybe he should show them the other scars, the more visible ones on his legs and stomach. 

“I have to make them afraid.” Basil says, “I have to make them see the pain they’ve caused me.”

“But what if they still don’t care?” Something says.

“Then at least I’ll just have to do something drastic…”

He washes up in the shower as he did yesterday and puts on his dress clothes, the only pair of his own clothes around the house here. They’ve been thoroughly washed, thanks to Polly, but the discomfort at wearing the same outfit three days in a row is very apparent on his face as he leaves the bathroom.

“Basil, I made you something to eat before you go.” Polly says as he enters the living room again. He sits down at the small dinner table as she puts down a plate of eggs, but he’s not super hungry so he eats very slowly.

“How does it taste?” She asks.

“Polly… Why do you care so much? About me, I mean.”

“W-Why do you ask?”

Basil doesn’t look up from his plate at all as he speaks. “I mean, this is just a job for you, isn’t it? You barely know me, and I barely know you.”

Polly smiles warmly, “Because the moment I met you, two years ago, you were afraid of me. I could tell you were a bright and passionate boy, but you seemed so isolated and terrified of the world, with nobody to care for you except for your grandmother. To be honest, it shocked me to my core seeing just how little your parents seemed to pay any mind to you. So I decided that I would be that support, be that caring person, because it’s what you deserve.”

“But it’s still just a job. When I no longer need you, won’t we become strangers again?”

He feels her hand rest on his shoulder gently, “Basil, we’re neighbors. Even if I won’t have to look after you so much once you’re older, I’ll still be just a short walk away. You can visit me any time, and I’ll always make time to visit you.”

“That would be nice.” Basil smiles.

The doorbell suddenly rings.

“That must be your parents, you should finish eating if you can.”

She goes and opens the door and, just as she had said, Basil can hear his parents at the door inquiring about him. After some preliminary small talk the two are let in and immediately he can feel his father’s presence behind him.

“You feeling better now after that walk?” His father says.

“Yeah.”

“Oh, dear, you had us all worried walking out like that and disappearing all day. What got into you?” Mom has a tone of concern, but Basil doesn’t buy it.

“Maybe I just wanted to spend some time with Polly.”

His father puts a hand on his shoulder, causing him to flinch a little. “Whatever the reason, it’s time for you to come home. We have some important things that need to be cleared up before we leave town again.”

Leave town again, they’re already set to go now. Probably won’t even stay a whole week, unless Basil does something about it. But not now, not in front of Polly. He has to wait until they get home first. So for now, he complies and gets up once he’s quickly finished the last of his breakfast. He waves Polly goodbye and they depart for his house, just across the street.

“You know, Basil, I really don’t appreciate the little stunt you pulled yesterday.” His father says sternly as they cross the street. “Leaving with barely a word and disappearing all day.”

And already the reprimanding is starting, not even a single ‘we were worried about you’, just ‘you were being rude to us so.’ As if their concerns are more important than his. Ironically, the more angry he gets at his parents, the more he wants to reveal the truth of his suffering to them- whether they act up and start loving him as parents should, or disown him entirely, at least he won’t be stuck with this condescension anymore.

“We were worried sick. You should have just told us if you wanted to see Polly.” His mother says. “We would have let you.”

Even more frustrating than his father’s heartlessness is his mother’s spinelessness. Her love is as fake as her smile. He won’t dignify either of them with words right now. When they get in the house the two stand before him with their arms crossed, faces concerned and disappointed.

“Basil, we know you’re hiding something from us.” His mother says. “Your room was a complete disaster.”

“I know times have been tough for you lately, but I thought you were more mature than to throw a fit and break things like that.”

“If there’s anything you want to talk about, please let us know.”

He still says nothing. They don’t deserve to act like this. Like they care. They should have been the ones buried in that cemetery, not Grandma.

“Do you have anything to say for yourself?” His father crosses his arms impatiently. “Or are you just going to stand there like you don’t care?”

“I don’t care.” He mumbles.

“What did you say?”

“I said, I don’t care! ” They both recoil in shock, it feels so good to have them on the backfoot like that. “I don’t care what either of you have to say! Why should I? You haven’t cared about me once in my entire life! You left me with my grandmother before I could even talk, and when she got too sick to do it you hired someone else to do it for you!”

“We’ve been busy making sure you have a roof over your head!” His father thunders with rage- this is the first time he’s ever been talked back to like this. “Do you know how much we pay Polly to look after you? Double- no, triple what she’d be getting from anyone else! We pay for the utilities, the electricity, the property taxes, we even would send money just to buy you food.”

“Do you really think throwing money at me makes up for any of this?!”

“Nono sweetie.” His mother says, “We just mean that we’ve been trying to care for you this whole time, even if we couldn’t be here personally.”

“Why couldn’t you?! What’s so important about your job that you decide to never see me for years? You think you can just disappear from the world for ages and then come back and I’ll be your faithful little servant doing everything you want, getting the haircut you like, dressing the way you want, letting go of my hobbies just in the hopes of making you happy when you’ll never be happy!” His voice is feeling hoarse already, but he can’t stop, he has to keep going. Has to make them understand.

“Basil, please be reasonable.” His mother pleads. “We’ve been trying to help you this whole time! You have to unders-”

“Shut up!” He grabs the rack of flowers nearest to the front door and tips it over. “You never listen to me! Do you have any idea how much I’ve been through these past four years? My grandmother died! I almost died! And you took an entire fucking month to even stop by and see if I was okay!”

The room falls silent, both his parents seem completely frozen in shock. “Basil… what do you mean?”

“Look at me!” He sobs, rolling up his sleeves to show them his arms. “Please, look at me! Help me! Don’t leave me like everyone else!” He collapses to his knees, still holding his arms out in front of him. The words are all lost on him now as he descends into incoherent sobbing.

His mother kneels beside him, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Basil, dear, we had no idea you had gone through so much.”

“I had a sneaking suspicion…” His father says with a sigh as he also kneels down. “You aren’t exactly good at keeping secrets, you know.”

“Yeah. You’ve been talking to yourself a lot recently, and we could tell something was off after you watched that movie.”

“You’ve been acting weird ever since we got here, in fact. But I never would have imagined…” His father looks down at his scars. “How long has this been going on?”

“F-Four… Four y-years.” He manages to say between sobs. “A-And you… you only v-visited three times… Four years in-in hell and y-you never even v-vi-visited on my birthday…”

“Oh Basil…” His mother pulls him into her embrace. “We always thought you were happy with how things were. You had great friends, a loving grandmother, every book and flower you could ever ask for, and you never complained.”

“Even when that friend of yours Mari died, we thought you had your friends to help you out…” His father says.

“You should have told us sooner. We would have done anything to help- anything , if you just told us what was wrong.”

Basil pushes her away suddenly, anger boiling in him all of a sudden. “ No! You can’t act like this is my fault for not telling you! You never should have left me to begin with! You haven’t even apologized for it!”

“Basil, please, we want to help.” She pleads.

“Then apologize! Tell me what you did was wrong! Tell me that it was a mistake to put your work before me! Tell me you should have loved me the way any parent should love their children!”

“Basil,” his father stands up. “I know what we did was regrettable but… I’m sure you’ll understand when you’re older.”

“Excuses!” He bolts to his feet, feeling like he could punch his father square in the jaw if he wanted to right now. “All you give me are empty excuses! Just tell me you don’t care and leave if that’s how you feel, don’t keep pretending to care while leaving me to deal with all of this myself.”

His mother stands up beside him, putting a hand on his shoulder. “We want to help you, you just need to be willing to trust us. We’re listening, just listen to what we have to say.”

He yanks his shoulder away from her, “No! Fuck you! If you won’t apologize, then I’ll make you regret it!”

In an instant he turns and storms out the front door, his parents attempt to grab him and pursue but he’s too fast for them. He hears them shouting for him but he won’t stop, not for a second. They won’t listen, so he needs to force them to listen. Needs to terrify them into seeing how badly they’ve treated him.

They can’t keep getting away with it. They can’t . But how can he do it? What could possibly make them change their minds? First, he needs to hide, go somewhere they won’t be able to find him. The lake hideout? Yes, that would work. Just gives him enough time to come to a decision. Thankfully, he doesn’t see any of his old friends as he walks there, nor any of their friends. Once he’s at the lake hideout he lays down on the blue and white picnic blanket always left here, gazing up at the sky aimlessly.

All his life, have his parents really never cared? Do they just want him to be quiet and obedient, never complaining about their neglect? Even when they seemed sorry, all they could do was make excuses and reasons for him to put up with their behavior. As if being his parents was enough to absolve them of any wrongdoing, or having good intentions makes his abuse justified. Polly, Mari, even Sunny’s parents had been better parental figures in his life than his own- at least Sunny’s mom would cook dinner for him often, before Mari died.

Why couldn’t any of them be his actual family? Why does he have to be stuck with such selfish and careless parents?

He walks over to the pier and looks into the dirty water- he almost drowned once already, and had thought about it again only yesterday. Maybe he’ll finally give up now? One “slip” and he’d die, with nobody around to save him. They’d spend hours searching before finding his body here, floating face-down in the water, and they’d know it was their fault. They didn’t love him, and they killed him. They’ll take the guilt with them to their graves, just as he does with his own guilt. He can see it now, his parents collapsed over his body, crying and begging for forgiveness- but he would never be able to forgive them.

But, he wouldn’t be alive to see it. He wouldn’t be able to hear them cry and apologize and beg for forgiveness from him. They would never be able to fix what they’ve done.

No. He doesn’t have to die, just make them worry that he almost died. If they don’t care after another near death experience, then they’ll never care if he lives or dies. But what would convince them? He can’t “almost drown” without someone else to rescue him, and he can’t fake a hanging without risking actually strangling himself.

He walks back to the picnic blanket, in the same spot Mari’s would be set during their old picnics. If only he had a knife or other blade to cut himself with, still easy to mess up but it’d leave a perfect mess of blood all over this blanket. It’d probably cause a bigger panic.

Maybe…

There! A large rock laying by the trunk of a tree. Picking it up, it’s heavy and rough, with a vaguely oval shape.

This will do.

It’s going to hurt like hell, maybe more than something clean like a knife, but it doesn’t matter. It’ll be more than worth it, in the end. They’ll all be so scared and relieved to see him alive. They’ll finally understand his pain and apologize for all their failings. Everything will be perfect after that. Everything will be as it should be, as it should have always been. He just… needs to do this one thing…

Crack

He slams the rock into his head, the pain is almost unbearable, but it’s not enough.

Crack

Again.

Crack

He can feel the blood trickling down the side of his head now, staining his clean white dress shirt. But he can’t stop now, not yet. He needs to send a message with this, after all.

Again.

Chapter Text

“First stop, Kim’s dad’s house.” Kel says as the three step out of his house into the afternoon fresh air. “Hopefully this all goes quickly, I have a bad feeling about Basil. I mean, we remember what happened last time…”

“I agree.” Hero says. “Although I’m sure he won’t be very excited to see all of us.”

Aubrey stays quiet, letting the two brothers lead the way. Will Basil even accept an apology this time? Or will he just hide from them, expecting more retribution? If his parents will even let the group see him is the bigger question, however.

“Hey Kel!” A shout directs the attention of the three- it’s Cris, standing in her doorway. She runs over to the three, her bright blue hair, tied back into a ponytail, whipping in the air. “Kel! You said we’d be able to hang out yesterday, where were you?” She glares at Aubrey, but says nothing.

“I’m sorry, stuff just came up yesterday that I had to deal with.” He nudges Aubrey with his elbow. “And I think someone has something to tell you…”

Way to be subtle about it, Kel. She sighs loudly. “I’m sorry for being such an asshole to you. And I’m sorry I laughed at your nose, it’s not actually that big…”

The blue-haired girl crosses her arms and huffs, “ I’m not the one you should be apologizing to.”

Aubrey crosses her arms, “Where do you think we’re going right now?”

Cris looks to Kel and Hero, “Can I tag along? I don’t really know Basil well, but I’m still concerned after what I saw of his house.”

Aubrey doubts it. She looks like she just wants a reason to hang out with Kel more. How could a girl be so interested in Kel of all people? He probably doesn’t even shower most days and yet this short swimmer girl seems to want nothing more than to hang out with him.

Hero nods, “I’m sure he wouldn’t mind.”

“The more the merrier, I suppose.” Kel adds, although he seems much more reluctant than his brother.

“Whatever.” Aubrey rolls her eyes and the now four companions depart to Kim’s dad’s house. It’s strange to think he’s been her neighbor her whole life, but she never once realized that he was Kim’s dad even when they two became best friends. “We need to get Kim first, so she can also apologize.”

“Today is just going to be a long line of apologies, isn’t it?” Hero says with a small chuckle.

When they reach the house, Hero naturally takes the lead to knock on the door. Kim’s dad quickly comes to the door and smiles, “Aubrey, Kim said you’d be stopping by. But,” he looks over at the gathered group, “I wasn’t expecting a party.”

“I hope you don’t mind, we won’t be here long.”

The four walk in and immediately go to Kim and Vance’s shared bedroom.

“You know, it’s kinda weird to me how you guys still share bedrooms with your siblings.” Cris says. “I mean, I thought it was normal to get separate rooms when you’re in high school.”

“I guess these houses just aren’t big enough.” Aubrey says. She looks back at Kel and Hero, “Hey, when Sally is older, where do you suppose her bedroom will be?”

“Er, well by then I’ll have probably moved out.” Hero says. “So she can take my half of our bedroom.”

“And then I’ll move out and she can have the whole room to herself!”

“ Right… ” Aubrey says before knocking on the bedroom door.

Vance opens the door- with his beard grown out more than usual, he looks uncannily like a younger version of his dad.

“What’s with the crowd? Is it someone’s birthday?”

“We uh, need to see Kim.”

Kim shoves her brother aside, “What the hell are all of you doing here? This some kind of intervention?”

“I suppose so, yeah.” Aubrey turns to the others, “Can everyone else wait out here? I think we need to talk personally.”

The others agree reluctantly, of course, and the two girls proceed to boot Vance out of the room before closing the door and locking it. The two immediately embrace, but Aubrey puts her hand up to keep Kim from kissing her- four people are outside likely putting their ears to the door right now, it’d be way too weird to start making out right now.

“What’s all this about, Aubrey? This isn’t like you, letting all those people barge into my house.”

“I know I know, I’m sorry it’s just…” She sighs. “It’s about Basil.”

“Do you regret what we did that day?”

“Yeah…” She looks off to the side. “I’ve been thinking about it for a while, to be honest. Even at the time I wasn’t really sure I wanted to hurt him like that, but you managed to talk me into it. I thought maybe it’d make me feel better to vent my anger, but it only made me feel worse.”

Kim puts her hands on Aubrey’s shoulders. “You said it yourself that he deserves it. He’s done horrible things. What’s got you doubting yourself suddenly?”

“I-I just don’t like being this type of person, someone who constantly bottles up all her anger until she can vent it by hurting people. I don’t care if he deserves punishment or not, it’s not like doing it ever makes me feel any happier.”

“But… you seemed happy at the time.”

“Kim, I was happy because I was with you. I love you so much, it makes me stupid sometimes. Stupid enough to do shit that I should know better than to do.” She puts her arms around Kim’s waist. “Aren’t you tired of everyone hating us? Of feeling like you constantly need to be ruthless and cruel all the time?”

“I like doing it, though.” Kim says weakly. “I always liked the feeling it gave me, to make everyone fear me. Respect me. Because when they were afraid, their words didn’t hurt me as much.”

“But Basil never hurt you, you just wanted to hurt someone who wouldn’t fight back.”

“Yeah…” She takes off her glasses and rubs her eye, “Aubrey, you’re probably way too good for me, you know. I’m sorry for being an asshole and dragging you along.”

“Heh, I’m really not. And I’m not the one you should be apologizing to.”

Kim smiles sadly, “If it makes you happy, sure.”

Aubrey kisses her on the cheek, “When this is over, let’s just forget about Basil and focus on what makes us both happy, okay?”

“That sounds nice.” Before either realize, they’ve locked lips, not caring about the others waiting outside. Nothing matters but Kim at this moment. Nothing. After a while they get interrupted by a knock on the door.

“You guys okay in there?” Kel says, “You haven’t said anything in-” Someone muffles him, clearly understanding what they’re doing in there.

Kim and Aubrey both laugh.

“Classic Kel.” Aubrey says. “A few steps behind as usual.”

“Sometimes I wonder why you even hang out with a guy like him.”

Aubrey smiles, “If it was anyone else I wouldn’t be able to stand it but Kel… he’s like a brother to me, to be honest. Even when he pisses me off, and he does a lot, I can’t help but love him.”

“As someone with a brother, I understand completely.”

The two leave the room to find the four others gathered around the door, just as Aubrey had expected.

“Did you guys hear everything?”

“Most of it.” Hero says.

“Enough to get the picture.” Cris adds.

“Oh, Cris.” Kim looks away reluctantly. “I, er, sorry for calling you stupid, and making fun of your nose. I like your blue hair, for what it’s worth.”

“Apology accepted.” The blue-haired girl smiles.

Kel grins “All’s well that ends well! Speaking of, since we have everyone here, we should go to Basil’s house now.”

The group departs now, Vance also tagging along because he doesn’t want to be left out. As they walk, Aubrey takes Kim’s hand and keeps her close, the two girls exchanging glances occasionally. Could this really be how Basil feels about Sunny? Is that really what drove him to cover up Mari’s death the way they did? Well, no need to speculate, they can ask him themselves when they see him. When the gang of six arrive at Basil's, they find Polly already lingering at the front door with a worried look on her face.

“Polly, something wrong?” Hero says.

“I-I was called here by Basil’s parents, they said it was urgent but…”

There’s muffled shouting inside, it sounds like Basil’s parents are arguing but it’s hard to make out what they’re saying. It sounds like they’re blaming each other for something.

Kim grumbles, “What are you doing just idling out here like a shy kid? If something’s wrong you gotta just rush in, damn whatever they’re doing right now.” She rings the doorbell a few times.

Basil’s Mom opens the door, looking stressed and worried. “Polly? Why are all these kids here with you.”

Hero steps forward. “Mrs. Rowntree we’re just here to check on Basil. Did something happen to him?”

She takes a moment to compose herself, “He-We had an argument and he started crying and he ran out of the house. We don’t know where he could have gone.”

“Basil’s missing again?” Kel says in disbelief.

“Did he say anything before he left? Anything that might tell us where he could have gone?” Aubrey says- His Mom seems to recognize her, but makes no comment of it.

“He said. ‘If you won’t apologize, then I’ll make you regret it’.”

“Fuck, we’re too late.” Aubrey slouches her shoulders. “We should have come sooner.”

Kim puts a hand on her shoulder. “Don’t say that, it’s never too late.” She turns to Basil’s Mom, “I think we could help look for him. Between the six of us, I don’t think there are any hiding places Basil has that we don’t know about.”

“Thank you, we were just about to call the police to be honest.”

“We can handle it.” Hero says. “But you should probably be ready to call them, just in case”

She nods, “We’ll follow you, then.” She calls over to her husband, Basil’s Dad comes to the door with a gloomy look on his face and the two exit the house together. Once the door closes the now nine companions turn to each other. “If I were him, I would probably go to the lake hideout spot.” Hero says.

Cris cocks an eyebrow, “Lake hideout spot?”

“There’s a little hidden lake out of the way in the park, there’s a path but it’s really overgrown.” Aubrey says, “It used to be the perfect place for picnics when we were kids.”

“We have to hurry!” Kel shouts. “You know he can’t swim, what if he-”

“Less talking, more moving!” Vance shouts, and the gang are off running down the street towards the park. Aubrey can only speculate how ridiculous this sight must look to any bystanders- five high schoolers and four adults hauling ass to the park like they’re being chased by something. When they reach the park, Hero shows Cris and the adults the way to the lake hideout spot, through the dense bushes and along a derelict foot path. When they get to the other side and see the lake, at first everything seems calm. Too calm. Kim grips Aubrey’s hand tightly, a sense of foreboding washing over the entire group.

“What if he already jumped into the lake?” Polly asks, shaking in terror, “W-What would we do?”

Aubrey sees something to the left, while everyone else is focused on the lake. The blue and white picnic blanket, left there by some unknown picnicer years ago. It should be mostly blue, but from here it looks like it’s turning red.

And there’s someone laying on it.

“Fuck, I see him!” She points to the picnic blanket.

“Oh God.” Polly gasps.

“Jesus.” Cris exclaims. She, Kel, and Hero are the first to rush to his side, with Aubrey following. Basil lays sprawled on his side, a pool of blood soaking into the blanket seemingly from the side of his head. In his hand he limply holds a bloody rock.

“He’s alive, thank God.” Hero says. “But he’s lost a lot of blood. Someone call an ambulance!”

Polly rushes to his side to help tend to the wound, while Basil’s Mom dials 911 on her cellphone. It’s just like the last time, at Basil’s house. So much blood, so much panic, and Aubrey feels like there’s nobody but herself to blame for it.

“This is my fault.” Kim says. “Fuck.”

Aubrey pulls her close, and Vance joins in the embrace. “It’s my fault, Kim. You were just following my lead.”

“No, it’s my fault.” Polly says, tears welling up in her eyes. “I-I should have done more.”

“No.” Basil’s dad steps up with a grim look on his face. “As his father, this is my failure alone.”

A few hours later, everyone is gathered in the hospital. Kel is surprised that even Cris, Kim, and Vance have decided to stick around for a while and see if Basil is okay. His parents are mostly silent as they wait around, Polly seems pale as a ghost, and Hero paces impatiently as they all wait for word on his state. Kel for his part can’t stop his leg from shaking. It sucks, feeling so constantly helpless, at the whims of fate or some other force. Again and again they find themselves here, in the hospital, worrying about someone who might have died.

Cris puts a hand on his shoulder. “You good, man?”

“Not really.”

“You wanna go get some water? It might help. Here, I’ll walk you there.” She grabs his arm and takes him out of the waiting room to the bathrooms.

“Cris? What’s this about?”

“Kel I’m just- I’m really worried about you, to be honest. I know there’s something you’re not telling me about Basil, and it seems important enough that it hospitalized both Sunny and Basil. I-I’m sorry if I’m prying into something that isn’t my business.”

He looks down at her pleading green eyes- she’s been such a loyal friend the past couple years, maybe one of his best friends. And he’s been ignoring her for the past month, just like he did with his old friends after Mari died. How can he keep denying her a place in this part of his life?

She looks away bashfully, “You know, when I first came back from boarding school, it was kind of scary here. It should have been my home, but I knew nothing about it, and nobody here knew me at all. I felt like a stranger in every way, but then I met you. You helped me when I needed a friend and… I guess I just want to do the same for you.”

“Well, I think you’re more than involved already after today. I… I’ll have to talk about it with Hero and Aubrey first but I promise, no secrets from now on.”

“Thank you, Kel.” She hugs him tightly, pressing her face against his chest.

“I’ve made the mistake before, distancing myself from a friend because I think it’s better for them. I promise I won’t make the same mistake again.”

The next day, Kel, Aubrey, and Hero return to the hospital to pay Basil a visit. He’s recovering well, having mostly gotten a moderate concussion, but he needs time to rest and recover.

“Not many people are visiting.” Aubrey muses as the three sit beside Basil’s bed. His parents were here earlier but left to deal with some personal matters, while Polly needs to take a bit to recover after how stressful yesterday was for her. Hero thought she’d have a stroke at any moment with how on edge she looked all day yesterday.

“Just like last time.” Kel says.

“Yeah, everyone visited Sunny but nobody spared a thought for Basil, except us and Polly.” Hero sighs.

“Maybe that’s why he’s doing this.” Aubrey’s eyes drift over to Basil, resting peacefully in the hospital bed. “Save Polly, it might seem to him like nobody in the world loves him- that nobody would care if he dies.”

His parents had explained the argument, and what had come before, in a lot of detail yesterday. Basil’s been on edge ever since they came home, it seems, and his garden being destroyed is what finally pushed him over the edge.

“It makes me wonder why he decided to just hurt himself with that rock.” Kel says. “I mean, if he threw himself in the lake, we never would have saved him.”

“Maybe…” Hero pauses for a moment to think, “Maybe he wanted to be saved.”

The other two nod quietly in agreement. It feels like Basil making a cry for help, a plead to the world that people care about him. Hero can’t really blame him for it, after everything he’s been through of late.

“Are you two still angry at him?” Kel says after a pause in the conversation. “Are you able to resent him for what he did after this?”

“I don’t know.” Aubrey says. “But I think I can understand his pain a little better now. I don’t have to forgive him to do that, at least.”

“We’ll put this all to rest once he wakes up.” Hero says. “We’ll make sure he tells us everything he’s kept secret from us, and judge for ourselves.”

At that moment, two people suddenly enter the hospital room. Two young black-haired individuals, obviously siblings, who Hero has seen around in the park occasionally.

“Mincy?” Kel says with shock. “And, er, Casey? You’re Jay’s friend, right?”

“Yeah, friend.” The Pretty Boy says with a coy smile. “We wanted to stop by as soon as we heard what happened.”

“You heard?”

“Of course!” Mincy says. “It’s practically the talk of the town.”

Aubrey raises an eyebrow, “That doesn’t explain why you two are here.”

“It’s a bit silly but, we ran into Basil a few days ago at the mall and talked with him and, well, a friend of Kel’s is a friend of mine I suppose. Hehe.” She takes the one last open chair in the hospital room and awkwardly pulls a sketchbook from her large bag. “I thought he’d appreciate a little gift- you know, something small but heartfelt. I was hoping he’d be awake to tell me what he’d want, but maybe you guys can tell me.”

“Flowers.” Kel says. “He’s always loved flowers.”

Mincy nods, “Any specific types?”

The three exchange a look, they know exactly what Basil would like.

“A rose.” Hero says. “Because everyone loves roses.”

“A gladiolus.” Aubrey says. “He’ll need the courage.”

“A flowering cactus.” Kel says. “Because he’s resilient like one.”

“A Lily of the Valley, to hope that happiness will return to his life.” Hero adds.

“A white tulip, for the hope of forgiveness.” Aubrey says.

“And in the middle, a big sunflower!” Kel finally exclaims. “For the bright future he’s bound to have!”

Mincy is grinning ear to ear by the end and she can’t help but chuckle, “You guys really put a lot of thought into that, didn’t you?”

Aubrey smiles and looks at Basil fondly, “He was the one who taught us about plants like that. All he ever wanted in life was to make a garden his friends would admire and take photographs of his most precious memories.”

“A lot has changed since then, Basil most of all.” Kel says. “I wonder if he’ll ever find that simple joy again.”

Hero smiles, “I think so. And maybe someday, we’ll all admire his gardening skills together again.”

“I’ll get to work on it immediately.” Mincy says before burying her face in her sketchbook.

Casey chuckles, “There she goes, throwing herself into her drawings with the fervor of a zealot.” He looks at Basil then to the three friends. He looks a lot like Sunny, now that Hero is taking a good look at him, but he’s a bit more refined and elegant in his presentation. “You three must really love him if you remember all of that so vividly.”

Love, hate, resentment, fear, so many feelings had swirled through Hero’s mind ever since learning the truth of Mari’s death. For the past month he felt directionless, and so he’d constantly ask Mari for some guidance- would she forgive them? Would she want him to forgive them? Sometimes it feels like the responsibility for what happened falls on their shoulders, but looking around at all those in the park yesterday, it seemed like everyone felt the same way.

Maybe they were all right, maybe everyone failed in their own ways. Sunny, Basil, Hero, Basil’s Parents, even Mari. Perhaps they should stop focusing on their past mistakes, and start focusing on how to fix them in the future.

Hero sighs. “We’ve had some… rough times these past few years, and we’ve been quite angry with him for his past mistakes but… I don’t think we can ever truly hate him.”

“I thought I hated him once, but now I’m not so sure…” Aubrey says.

“What will we say to him when he wakes up?” Kel muses aloud.

“Just tell him that you’re glad he’s okay.” Casey says, “Everything else can come later.”

“You’re right.” Hero says. “I think that’s what he needs most right now.”

Later in the evening, Polly sits by Basil’s side anxiously- she hated leaving him alone, but Hero wisely told her to take a rest today after how harrowing and stressful yesterday was for her. Still, she feels like she’s barely keeping herself from shaking right now.

I’m going to start getting grey hairs before I turn 35, at this rate.

Basil’s friends stepped out to get dinner, leaving her with only his parents.

His parents, who left him to his grandmother for most of his life.

His parents, who hired her to care for him since they couldn’t bother.

His parents, who couldn’t even bother to visit for his birthday or holidays.

“Why did you do it?” Polly says without thinking.

“Do what?” Mr. Rowntree says.

“Leave him. Abandon him. Whatever you want to call it.” She looks down at Basil regretfully. “You left his grandmother to raise him for his whole life, while you go traveling around the world for your elite job. What made you think that was a good idea?”

“We- I thought that he wouldn’t be happy living the same lifestyle as us…” Mrs. Rowntree says with a dejected look. “Moving around so much isn’t healthy for a kid, he’d never be able to make friends or fit in anywhere. My mother understood completely, it was her idea to let her take care of him, to be honest.”

“Over the years, as he made friends and seemed to find a community here, I suppose I started feeling like I didn’t have to care.” Mr. Rowntree says.

She glared both of them down, “You’re both the worst, you know. You spent his whole life thinking that throwing money at him was a substitute for being loved, all the while he was desperate for a single moment of time with you.”

“We should have been more attentive…” He says almost reluctantly.

“But you’re still going to leave, aren’t you? Go back to your cushy corporate job and leave me to do the work that you’re too apathetic to do.” She sighs, “Fine, if that’s what you want. Basil already looks to me as a parent more than he does either of you.”

The two stay quiet for a moment, looking between each other with guilty faces.

“Is it too late for us to try to fix it?” Mrs. Rowntree says. “He’s nearly an adult, after all. We’ve already missed out on all of his childhood.”

“It’s never too late to be better parents, but I don’t think it’ll ever make up for that failure. But that’s for Basil himself to decide, really.”

Mr. Rowntree sighs and slouches forward in his chair, his wife putting a reassuring hand on his back. “Do you think he’ll ever forgive us?”

“I don’t know, it’s up to him but…” She looks at him and gently takes his hand. His breathing is steady, and he looks almost like he’s simply taking a nap, were it not for the bandages around his head. “He’s never been one to hold a grudge in my experience, even with someone who has hurt him.”

Chapter Text

The flowers stretch from horizon to horizon, beyond Basil’s reckoning. The fields seemed almost infinite, in his times spent wandering them. He doesn’t even need to spare a glance at each to know exactly what type they are by heart. Normally he would be comforted by the sight of natural beauty but, where is everyone else?

“Hello!” He calls out to the endless field. “Is anyone here?”

“Basil…” a voice calls out, barely heard in the rustle of the wind. “Basil!”

“Hello?” He looks around, nobody is nearby but… someone is here. Calling to him.

“Help me!” The voice cries, familiar yet too faint to really make out who it is.

He tries to follow the voice to the best of his ability and finds a person laying among the flowers. It’s Mari, collapsed in a heap.

“Mari? What are you doing here? Where is everyone?”

“Basil, help me. I can’t get up.”

He puts an arm around her and helps her to her feet. “Where is everyone?”

“You already know where they went.” Mari says with an almost cruel smile. “They left.”

It’s only then that Basil notices the marks around Mari’s neck, her corpse-pale skin, her dead eyes, the slight bit of blood on her face. He lets go of her and backs away, letting her collapse to the floor, but all she does is laugh at him. The field seems to melt away, and he suddenly finds himself in a familiar yet alien house. It’s like Sunny’s house, but wrong. No paintings on the walls, the furniture outside the piano room seems off, the stairs seem to ascend infinitely. Mari lays dead at his feet, crumpled in a pile of hair and limbs bent awkwardly.

She grabs his ankle. “Basil… Why did you hang me?”

He tries to pull his foot away but she’s too strong. Far too strong. She uses him as leverage to pull herself up, her hair growing and enveloping her like a shadow until Something looks down at Basil condescendingly.

“You betrayed them. You betrayed me.”

“M-Mari, please. I just wanted to protect Sunny! I’m sorry!”

Something lets out a raspy laugh. “You claim to have done it for Sunny’s sake, but it was really for your own sake. You loved him, and you were terrified of losing him, to the point that you’d throw everything away to keep him by your side.”

“N-No, that’s not it! That’s not-”

“You know it’s true!”

Basil tries to pull his foot away again but Something’s grip only tightens.

“Oh, dear Basil.” It chuckles. “You know it’s pointless to resist. You betrayed everyone for your own selfish desires, and for that you deserve nothing but scorn. They’ll never forgive you, no matter what. Because you killed Mari. You destroyed all their lives for nothing.”

It constricts his limbs like a snake and pulls him up into the air. He thrashes, but the more he thrashes the tighter it squeezes, and the more exhausted he feels. He’s so tired, after so many years of fighting this battle. Why can’t it just end?

“They’ll just keep hurting you, because they know you’re disgusting. It would be easier for them and you alike if you didn’t exist.”

“Y-You’re wrong.”

“Do you think Sunny or Polly are going to save you? Do you think the hollow love of two people is enough to redeem your tainted soul? You don’t deserve their concern, especially not Sunny’s, after everything you’ve done to hurt them.”

“I… No… I can’t give up.” He struggles to speak, even moving his mouth feels exhausting.

“Why keep going? Just to face more suffering?”

“B-Because… Because…” Why is he doing it? It would be easier to give up, it’s true. But he won’t. He can’t.

Because of Sunny.

They’ve both done horrible things, it’s true. Things they can never undo. But they can still grow from it, just as Sunny did when he got the courage to tell everyone the truth. He can do the same, learn and grow and move on, and someday they’ll meet again as new people.

And maybe then, they can start again.

“I-I made… a promise! ” With a sudden burst of energy he yanks himself free from Something’s grasp.

“A lie! An empty promise! He’s going to abandon you just like he did before!”

“No, he won’t. I assumed so for the longest time, but now I realize I was wrong to distrust him.”

Something backs off for a moment, regarding him with what he assumes is anger. “Why would he ever truly forgive you? Why would he love you? You can claim to grow and change but you’ll just make the same mistakes again next time.”

“You’re wrong. I might regress sometimes, but I won’t make the same mistakes, because I now see the truth. I couldn’t accept the truth before, so I blamed you and made you into this monster haunting my mind. But now, I know what I have to do.”

“Foolish. As long as your guilt remains, I’ll be here.” Something hisses. But it’s already shrinking away, no longer towering over him.

“Perhaps, but I’ll keep going regardless, because there are people out there still fighting for me.”

The shadows slowly dissipate as Something begins to fade away. Or rather, it returns back to what it used to be. Before Basil again lays a body, now curled peacefully in rest. Eyes open, and look up at Basil.

“Basil.” Mari says with a soft smile.

“Mari…” He drops to his knees and the two embrace. Warmth envelopes Basil, and for a moment it almost feels like Mari is still alive with him. “I’m sorry, Mari. For everything. I was such a coward, and an idiot. I ruined everything just to protect Sunny, and all I did was make his life even worse.”

“I know.” She says reassuringly.

“I pushed him into it, and then I acted like I was a good person for helping keep it a secret all those years.”

“I know.”

“Mari… Would you ever forgive me?”

She sighs, “Basil, I’m already dead. You already know that the dead cannot answer pleas for forgiveness like that, otherwise you would already be dead.”

“I know but… I just want to hear you say it.”

She runs her hand through his hair. “Maybe someday.” The two stand up, parting their embrace. Mari smiles weakly, she seems as tired as Basil feels. “I wish I could stay a little longer, but I have to go.”

“Will we ever meet again? I mean, not just in a dream.”

“Like I said, someday we will. When it’s your time to join me.” She turns to the stairs, stretching up endlessly. “Until then, take care of yourself.”

She begins ascending the stairs, to wherever they lead.

“Goodbye, Mari.”

“Goodbye, Basil. I miss you.”

With that, she ascends out of view, leaving Basil all alone again. There was no forgiveness there but, she was absolutely right, the dead simply cannot be looked to for forgiveness. Only the living can offer it. But where does that leave him? Force to confront the friends who still bear the pain of his actions? Can he ever bring himself to ask them for forgiveness, or expect them to give it? Even if he resolves to keep going, that doesn’t guarantee a good outcome.

Maybe they won’t change at all. Aubrey might just go back to hurting him, and Kel and Hero will keep ignoring it. How can he move on if they’ll just be there to remind him constantly? And then he’ll try to run away again, and return to this point again.

Return. That’s what he needs to do now. Return to where he came from. Home. He’s not sure why, but he needs to be there.

The world around him morphs, the walls constricting into the shape of his bedroom. Everything is just as it used to be, before he threw his stupid fit and broke it all for no reason.

“Basil.” The Stranger says, sitting on his bed almost casually. “I’ve been waiting for you here. I’m glad you got this far, but there’s still one thing you need to do. Perhaps the hardest thing you’ll ever do.”

“Why am I doing all of this?” Basil says, looking around in fear. “The monsters following me everywhere, the ghosts, you. Why am I inflicting this on myself?”

“Because you could not live with your own lies.”

The memories come back then, every moment in the past few days with his parents- pretending to be alright, pretending to like their ideas, pretending he’s the son he thought they wanted him to be. The haircut, the suit, taking off his flower, all to make them accept him so they wouldn’t leave him again.

“I… I just…” He struggles to say, “I just wanted to have a normal family.”

“You wanted to escape your guilt and pain.”

“What’s wrong with that?” Basil shouts.

“Because it’s impossible, you cannot escape yourself. You can try to throw it all away, but it’ll always remain here, in your heart. I’ll always remain here, because I’m you.”

“How am I supposed to live like this? I don’t want to have to keep going through this struggle.”

“You don’t have to.” The Stranger says kindly. “That’s why I helped you get to this point, when you could face your parents. When you could finally overcome your fear.”

“But it’ll just come back, won’t it? I’ll become paranoid of everyone’s intentions again, they’ll hurt me as before. Why should I remake the garden if they’ll just destroy it again?”

“You can’t control their feelings, it’s true. But you have to face them still, and tell them the truth. And maybe things will change after that, once they understand your pain.”

“And what if they still hate me?”

“This isn’t about them, this is about you.” Stranger stands up and looks Basil dead in the eyes. “You worry that they’ll hate you because you hate yourself. You distrusted Sunny’s words because you could not accept that he might love you still. You feared Polly leaving because you could not understand why she might stay to care for you.”

“Of course I hate myself. I’ve hurt the people who matter most to me. I even hurt Sunny, in a misguided attempt to show him how much I love him. Even if he truly forgives me, that just shows that he’s too good to deserve the love of someone like me.”

The Stranger smiles. “He probably looks to you similarly. Do you think he doesn’t regret his own mistakes? That he doesn’t feel like he’s hurt you, too?”

Basil sighs, “You’re probably right. But what if he doesn’t love me, in the same way I love him?”

“If you learn to love yourself, it won’t matter. It will hurt, but you’ll be able to move on and keep living. If you stay the way you are now, and keep putting all your self-worth in how others feel about you, then you’re bound to end up back here after every disappointment.”

“You make it sound easy!” Basil suddenly shouts. “After everything I’ve done, how can I love myself?”

“I never said it’s easy, just that it’s necessary.” The Stranger’s form suddenly changes, grows smaller, until a new one is revealed- it’s Basil, the old Basil, the young and idealistic Basil, wearing his old overalls and a green shirt. He adjusts the flower crown on his head and smiles innocently. “I should know.”

“I-You…” Basil stammers but can’t seem to find the words.

Young Basil steps up to him, looking up directly into his eyes still, “I’m everything you hate about yourself. Everything you tried to reject and abandon.”

“I… I’m sorry.” Basil says, “Everything you are only reminded me of my mistakes. That’s why I feared you, why I hated you.”

“Nobody can live without regrets, least of all you. But, you can learn to live with it.”

“How?” He feels the tears run down his cheeks as he looks down at his old self. “How can anyone live with this pain and hate?”

“I know it’s hard to believe, but one mistake doesn’t have to define your entire life. You’re only 16, you have your whole life ahead of you.” Young Basil lightly grabs Basil by the upper arms. “What do you want to do from here? It’s up to you.”

“I don’t know… I’m sorry.” He wipes tears from his eyes and sniffles. “I lost my way years ago, and I don’t know where to go from here.”

“That’s okay, you have a lot of time to figure it out. Until then, you have to love yourself, because nobody else can do it for you.” The Young Basil embraces Basil tightly, a feeling of warmth and comfort washes over him. “Despite everything, I love you.”

“I… I love you, too.” He closes his eyes and holds his younger self.

Basil opens his eyes to a familiar white ceiling, and the equally familiar bustle of a busy hospital. He can hear people moving and talking around him- is that Polly? His mother? Hero? Someone says “He’s waking up” and everyone goes silent.

Looking around, it seems like everyone is there- Polly, his family, his old friends, they all look at him with relief.

“Basil…” Polly pulls him into an embrace as he tries to sit up. He can hear her crying. “I-I’m so glad you’re okay.”

“Yeah, we were all worried about you.” Kel says. “You really had us worried.”

Basil looks down at his blanket, “I’m sorry… For all of this. I got you all so worked up, no doubt.”

His father puts a hand on his shoulder, “It’s okay, I… I’m sorry I was treating you so poorly.”

He’s not sure he heard that right- his father? Apologizing? Admitting that he’s been a bad parent? If it weren’t for his persistent headache, Basil would swear he’d died and gone to heaven.

“You’re not angry?”

“No,” his mother says. “We’re not angry. You were right to be so upset with us, and you were right to tell us. We’re just glad to see you’re okay now.”

“Even though you know that I…” His eyes drift up to his friends, standing beside the bed looking relieved.

“It’s okay, we understand.” Hero says.

“You can explain it all later.” Aubrey says. “Right now, you need to rest.”

They don’t hate him.

They don’t hate him.

Even Aubrey looks relieved. After everything they’ve been through, all the ways he’s hurt them, they still care? It almost feels wrong, like he manipulated all of them into this with his fake suicide attempt but… no, they didn’t start caring because of that. They always cared, they just never expressed it so clearly until now. Polly won’t let go of him, but he doesn’t mind. He puts his arm around her and lets her kiss him on the cheek, feeling her tears rub off onto his face.

“I’m sorry, Polly.” He can’t help but join her in tears. “I’m so sorry for putting you through all of this.”

“It’s okay. Just as long as you’re safe.”

The others give the two a little space, until Polly has calmed down enough to pull away from Basil. She’s such a soft woman, and such a worrier- she really did not deserve to be caught up in Basil’s downward spiral, but there’s nothing he can do about that now but let her be there for him.

“Hey, Basil.” Kel steps forward with a bag and offers it to him. “We got you a few gifts.”

He rifles through the bag and pulls out a package of seeds. Rainflowers, a symbol of rebirth and new beginnings. He reaches in and finds even more seeds; Celandine, representing joys to come; Chamomile, energy in adversity; White Heather, “your wishes will come true”; and, of course, Sunflowers, for a brighter future.

“I helped them with those.” Polly says, still wiping tears off her face.

“She’d read some of your flower books in her free time and knew a bit about the symbolism.” Aubrey says.

“Thank you.” A few more small gifts are in the bag, mostly trinkets and baubles for him to keep, until he reaches the last one- an envelope.

“Oh, that’s from Mincy.” Kel says. “She wanted to draw something special for you, and we made sure she knew exactly what you’d like.”

He opens it up and pulls out a single piece of paper- it’s a detailed sketch of many kinds of flowers. Roses, Gladioli, Tulips, a Cactus flower, Lilies of the Valley, and at the center a tall, proud Sunflower.

Get well soon!! - Mincy

“I… Thank you. Thank you all so much.”

“It’s nothing.” Hero says with a smile. “Things have been pretty… rough between us lately, but I want you to know that we still care about you.”

“Sometimes you just can’t help but love someone, even after they’ve done everything wrong.” Aubrey says, crossing her arms as she does so. “Kinda like family.”

Family, that’s what he is to them still? Even after everything. He involuntarily lets out a sigh of relief and smiles, despite the lingering aching in his head he feels better than ever.

Looking at them now, it feels like something has changed- not in them, but in him. For the first time it really strikes him how tall Kel has become. He’s obviously noticed that Kel has gotten tall, it’s hard to miss, but standing her now next to his similarly tall brother it feels like he’s only seeing it now for the first time.

And Hero! So mature now, already an adult. They’ve barely seen each other before now, and when they did it was never under happy circumstances. He’s honestly looking quite good for himself, better than Basil had thought.

And Aubrey, what gets him there is not how different she’s become, but how little she’s truly changed. The same kind eyes shine through her teal contacts, the same warm smile now covers her, the first time he’s seen her smile for a long time. Her pink hair, a promise from so long ago, still diligently kept, hangs all the way down to her stomach now.

“C-Can I have a mirror?”

His mother hands him a small hand mirror from her purse, letting him look at himself with fresh eyes. He looks terrible, even after one night of decent rest he looks almost as worn out as he feels. His hair, cut short in this silly business style to appease his parents, is thankfully covered up by the bandages around his head. His hair might be even shorter now, since they’d need to shave around the wound to better stitch it up. The scars from his fight with Sunny still remain, giving him an even more haggard, beaten down look.

And yet despite that, he’s never felt more alive.

Chapter Text

Late September, three months later.

Fall has never really been Basil’s favorite season. Sure, the leaves falling look pretty, but it’s all just life dying away and preparing for the months of winter freeze ahead. It’s sort of how Basil has felt at this time of year in the past, quietly anticipating the inevitable months of solitude and depression that follow.

But this year, it feels a bit different.

Or, rather, he feels different.

The past few months since the funeral have been a whirlwind of changes for him, it seems. He’s been in and out of a mental hospital a few times, started seeing a therapist, and began the long task of remaking his garden all over again. Looking around, the world as a whole doesn’t seem like it’s changed much, yet everything feels changed at the same time.

He looks down at his new flip phone- a parting gift from his parents, before they inevitably had to return to work. They promised to spend more time with him going forward, even promising to set aside time from Christmas to his birthday just for him. Sometimes it feels like too little, too late, but he can’t blame them for trying. After all, if he deserves a second chance, then so do they. He knows what number he needs to dial, he memorized it in fact. It’s just a few numbers to dial and yet, he can’t seem to bring himself.

He’s been trying for a few days and failing.

What will he think? It’s been months since they last spoke to each other, it might seem like Basil has been completely ignoring him. No, he needs to stop doubting his best friend like that. He’ll certainly be happy to hear from him after so long.

But what if it’s a bad time? What if he’s too busy? What if-

“You know you can’t call someone just by staring at your phone really hard. You have to actually dial a number.”

He looks up, Kim stands in front of him with her arms crossed, wearing her usual blue hoodie. For a while after his time in the hospital, the two had a humorously similar hairstyle, but now his hair has been growing out enough that he can cut it symmetrically again. It’ll still take a while for him to get back his usual look, but it’s a work in progress.

“Oh, hey Kim.”

“I’m surprised they let you go to the park considering all the rocks you could use to-” She stops herself. “Sorry, no, that’s the old me. I’m a new person now, y’see? Trying to clean up my act.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Really! No more bullying. In fact, just to prove it- you actually look really nice in pink.”

He looks down at his pink t-shirt- in the past, Kim was often the first person to mock him for wearing ‘effeminate’ colors like that. He’s not sure if she’s being honest, but the compliment still makes him smile, “Thanks.”

“Anyways where the hell have you been? I haven’t seen you in school at all.”

“I… I’m going to a different school this year.” He sighs. “You and Aubrey and the others might be moving on, but everyone else in school would still pick on me relentlessly. I wanted a new environment so I could make new friends and focus on finishing high school- especially since I have classes I need to repeat.”

Kim shrugs, “Can’t say I blame you for that.” She looks out in the distance, for a moment. “You know, it’s none of my business, but I really still don’t quite get why everyone let you off so easily.”

“Don’t ask me, sometimes even I’m not sure.”

“Well, for what it’s worth, moving on is always easier than holding onto your anger. Cuz, you know, if you wanna keep being angry, you have to constantly remind yourself of the pain.”

He nods, “Yeah, you’re right.”

“Anyways, I’ll leave you to your important call.” She turns and begins to leave but stops. “Oh, tell that nerd Sunny I said hi.”

“How did you…”

“What other person in the world would you be trying to call right now? The President?” She laughs and walks away.

It’s really that obvious, huh? He can’t help but laugh in embarrassment. Guess he has no choice but to go through with it now.

He dials the number and holds his breath. Every moment that passes as the phone rings feels like an eternity.

Click

“Hello?” Just that one word takes away all of Basil’s stress and worries. Sunny, dear Sunny. He’s been longing to hear his voice for so long now.

“Sunny, h-hi. It’s me.”

“Basil…”

“I-I’m sorry it’s been so long since we last spoke! I’m especially sorry for not calling you for your birthday.”

“It’s okay. How are you?”

“I’m good now, but a lot has happened in the past few months.” He sighs. “I, er, I’d rather not get into all of it right now, to be honest. It’s a bit depressing. But, I just want to say, I should have trusted you more. I’m sorry.”

“We all make mistakes.”

“Us two more than others, maybe.”

“Yeah…” Sunny goes quiet for a moment. “How’s everyone else?”

“They’re all doing well, they haven’t fully come around yet, but they’re getting there.” He and Kel have been talking occasionally ever since the incident at the lake hideout, and Hero would check on him from time-to-time before he went back to college.

“I-If you don’t mind, could you tell me more? I’ve missed our talks.”

Basil feels his face redden and he can’t help but smile. It’s so weird, they’ve talked hundreds of times before, but now he feels so giddy to hear Sunny say that- realizing he’s in love has really made even his thoughts of Sunny feel different somehow.

“Alright. Where do I begin…”

Early July

Aubrey steps into her house with a sigh, it was a good day while it lasted, but now she’s back in her disgusting hovel as usual. Mom is resting on the couch, as usual, with the TV on as usual.

At least the power is working again.

Her mom doesn’t look at her, simply staring at the TV vacantly. It’s not really her fault she’s like this, is it? The world really dealt her a shitty hand, and she hasn’t been able to adjust to it. Looking around the house, Aubrey feels a little stupid- she’s been letting her life go to shit and for what? Her pride?

Bah, if Basil can start putting his life back together, then so can she.

Her mom just needs a little push to get started.

“Mom.”

Her mom looks up at her. She looks so weak and haggard, she might even be ill for all Aubrey knows. It’s sad. It’s pathetic. It’s pitiable. But it’s her mother. Her mother. She used to be so much more, so much kinder and happier and more beautiful, even in tough times before her dad left. Maybe they can’t go back to that, but that doesn’t mean she has to be like this forever. “Aubs, how was your day?”

“Mom, when’s the last time you changed your clothes?”

“I don’t know, why?”

“Get up, we’re going to change that.”

“Wha?” Her mom stands up shakily, she’s so thin and weak since she barely eats. “What do you mean?”

“Mom, I think it’s time we tried to clean-” she gestures around the house, “all of this. ”

Mom just stands there quietly, watching her with utter confusion and… fear? “I don’t know…”

“Mom, I know things have been rough these past few years for you, and I’ve been too stubborn to do anything but let you spiral like this…” She looks away a bit, “I’ve blamed you for a lot of problems in my life but, well, I think if we work together we can start putting ourselves on the right track again.”

“You make it sound so simple.” She steps forward but stumbles and collapses into Aubrey’s arms. “I-I can’t do it. I tried, but I just can’t do it anymore.”

“I can get a job since we need more money, and my friend Kel’s family said they could always use a pet sitter to watch their dog when they go out of town on vacation.”

Her mother seems to deflate, “So you’re just going to put your own life aside to care for me?”

“No, mom, you’re going to learn to take care of yourself. I’ll just help you get there.” She smiles, “Besides, it’s not like I have any big dreams like college, working at the hardware store is fine by me. Just as long as I’ve got my friends.”

Aubrey puts an arm around her mother’s shoulder to steady her.

“Now, come on. I’m sure you’ll feel a lot better after a bath, clean clothes, and a warm meal.”

Her mother smiles sadly. “Aubs, why are you doing this? I’ve been nothing but a total screwup of a parent.”

“Because I still love you, mom.”

Mid-August

Only a few days until he goes back to campus for college, and how’s Hero spending it? Doing chores for his parents, of course. No wonder Aubrey’s friends all think he’s boring. It probably doesn’t help that he has no friends his age, either. He just spends all day hanging out with his younger brother when he’s not doing work around the house.

Speaking of, if only Kel were here to help carry all these bags. It’s probably the hottest part of the year still, and he thought it’d be great exercise to walk to Othermart today, but now he’s very much starting to regret that decision. But as usual, Kel ran off to hang out with the neighbor Cris and some of his other buddies from high school. If Hero didn’t know his brother better, he’d assume that Kel was just sneaking off for some private time with a girl. That’s what he and Mari often did, after all.

“Yo Hero!” He hears someone call out as he passes by the fountain next to Hobbeez. It’s Brandi with her two friends, who Hero has seen around the neighborhood occasionally. “You got a minute?”

Well, nothing he’s bought needs to be put in the freezer, so why not?

“Er, yeah?”

“How many classes are you taking next semester?”

“Five, why?”

Brandi leans back on the bench, “If you ever have any free time from studying, you really should come hang out.”

“I-I’d love to but-”

“Look, man.” Katie, a girl with short blue hair and a very colorful shirt, suddenly interjects. “Aren’t you tired of hanging out with a buncha high schoolers all day long? Don’t you wanna like, hang out with other adults for once?”

“Y-Y-Yeah.” Says the other friend, Curtsey from the candy store, “My brother always told me that college is about making friends just as much as studying.”

“Don’t you have 4 brothers?” Brandi says.

She is right, college should be a place where he makes new friends and finds a community to join, but he hasn’t really made any effort to do either. Ever since Mari, he hasn’t made any new friends at all, simply preferring to focus on his work and his family.

“I-I’ll think about it I guess.”

“That means no.” The Colorful Girl says sardonically.

The other two girls chuckle. She’s right, that was a polite way for him to try and decline the invitation.

“Hero, why are you so afraid of living a little?” Brandi says. “All you do is study, work, and babysit your brother and his friends- don’t you want to have a life of your own?”

“Why are you so interested in my life?”

“Because she thinks you’re hot.” Curtsey blurts out, causing Katie to laugh uproariously.

“She got you there!”

Brandi crosses her arms and huffs, looking away from him bashfully, “I mean, it’s not just that. You’re a good guy, easy to get along with, yet you always seem so lonely when you’re not home with your family. I guess I just thought you might need someone to push you out of your comfort zone a little.”

“I appreciate the sentiment but, maybe try not to be so forceful about it.”

“Sorry.” She’s clearly trying to hide that she’s blushing. “But, uh, would you still like to hang out in the future?”

She is correct about him needing to get out of his comfort zone and meet people his age, and she surely has friends she can introduce him to at college. Even if she’s been a little too pushy about it, she clearly has a genuine interest in getting to know him and getting him out there.

Hero smiles, “You know what? Sure.”

Early September

“How are you so good?” Cris says as she drops the controller in her lap.

“Heh, I was never even the best of my friends, you know.” Kel says with a smile. “Sunny always knew all the secret moves in the game, I could never beat him.”

Cris leans back on her elbows and chuckles. “That seems so him.”

The two sit side-by-side on the floor in Kel’s room, playing the console he keeps just by his bed. With Hero out for college, he has a lot more privacy to use the room how he sees fit- like inviting friends over to play games without bothering him.

“You know he and Basil are the ones who introduced me to Pet Rocks.”

“Really? Hard to imagine a time when you weren’t carrying yours around everywhere you go.”

“He’s my best friend!” Kel grins.

“I thought Hector was your best friend.”

“I can have more than one best friend. In fact, I can name three right now.”

“Really? Do tell.”

He holds up his fingers to count. “One. Hector. Two. My Pet Rock. Three. You. ”

“I’m honored to be ranked at the same level as your dog and a video game character.” Cris says sarcastically. She looks so cute today, in a red sleeveless hoodie that reaches down far enough to almost entirely cover her jean shorts, and a pair of long black socks. Her hair, freshly dyed an almost metallic-looking blue, is pulled back in a tight bun on top of her head.

“That still puts you above most of my friends.”

“Am I above Hero?”

Kel laughs, “Maybe a little. ”

She chuckles and scoots a bit closer to him, giving him a chance to notice the faint smell of coconut on her. It smells nice.

“Well, I’d say you’re my best friend, too.”

“Heh, really?”

“Of course! Would a face like this lie to you?” She smiles playfully, and Kel can’t help but smile back. She’s got an infectious smile like that sometimes, the kind that always lifts his spirits a little.

“If you did, you wouldn’t tell me, obviously.”

“You got me there.” She scoots a little closer. What were they just doing before? “You think your parents would mind if we did this every weekend?”

“Well, er, they might get a little suspicious about me hanging out with a girl so often. Heh.”

“And?” She’s almost touching him by now, but she doesn’t scootch any closer. “You’ve never really been one to care about what your parents think.”

“Heh. I guess you’re right.” He scratches the back of his head. “But like, you know how moms get when they see you hanging out with someone of the opposite sex, y’know?”

“What, afraid they might think we’re dating or something?” She grins mischievously. “What’s so bad about that?”

He laughs awkwardly, he can feel his face turning red and his body heating up. “I mean, uh, we’re not dating.”

She puts her hand on top of his. “I mean… we could be, if that’s what you want…”

Wait, what?

Huh?

“I-I’m not sure I mean this kind of out of nowhere and…” Their eyes meet, her soft green eyes sparkle with expectation. She’s so wonderful, why is he hesitant? “And…” She’s looking at him expectantly, her lips pursed in curiosity. It’s no time for thinking, he just needs to act.

He puts his hand on her shoulder and pulls her in for a kiss. It’s an awkward, messy kiss for the both of them, but it doesn’t matter. She returns his passion tenfold in her kiss, and when they part she tackles him to the ground in an embrace. They can’t help but laugh together there, laying on the floor in an awkward pile.

“Kel, I love you.” She pulls herself closer, resting her head under his chin. He closes his eyes and envelops her in a tight embrace.

“I love you, too.”

“… And that’s about it, really.”

“They sound happy.” Sunny says.

“Heh, yeah, I think they’ve all been a lot happier recently.” Basil wouldn’t credit it to himself, but it seems like finally figuring out their feelings about him and Sunny let the three of them start focusing on other parts of their lives again.

“And you?”

“Me? Well…” He’s had some of his lowest lows this past year, between Sunny leaving and his parents returning. He hurt himself a lot, and he hurt others, too. He almost died a few times, even. And yet, he kept going. Somehow. Even when everything seemed hopeless, he kept going. And now? He’s got nowhere to go but up from here. A broad smile crosses his face, almost involuntarily. “I’ve never felt better.”

“That’s all I wanted to hear.” Sunny says.

“How long do you think it’ll be before you come back?”

“We’ll see. My mom might not like me visiting you, to be honest. But I will, someday.”

On the other end of the phone Basil faintly hears a girl’s voice shout, “Yo Sunny! You done with that call yet?”

“Oh, sorry, I’ve kept your friends waiting, haven’t I?”

“Don’t be sorry, Basil. I’m glad we got to talk. Maybe we can talk again tomorrow.” The idea fills him with hope, maybe they can even make these conversations daily? Or at least weekly. A little check-in every now and then would really help.

“That sounds nice, maybe you can even tell me about your dreams more like you promised.”

“I will…” A silence passes between the two, neither wants to end the call right now. “I-I should go. Bye.”

“Bye, Sunny. I’ll talk to you later.”

Click

He lets out a deep sigh and looks into the sky. How many years will he need to wait to see Sunny again? It doesn’t matter, he’d wait an eternity if he has to, because he knows they’ll be together again no matter what. They’ve both gone through hell, but now they finally have a chance to grow, to heal, to learn how to live again.

He won’t let that go to waste.

It’s a clear and sunny day today, with few clouds. The sky almost seems to stretch on forever, an entire world of possibilities opened to him after years of rotting and destroying himself. After years of self-inflicted torment. What will he do with that freedom? He’s still not sure, but he won’t take it for granted.

For now he should just finish high school and get on his feet, everything after that can be done in its own time. Maybe he’ll get a job? Fix-It always needs help, and they have a lot of flowers that need tending to all the time. Maybe he could get into drawing? Art’s always been a passion of his, but he was never as good as someone like Mari, and didn’t really practice a ton since he was focused so much on just gardening. Oh, and there are so many books out there he still needs to read. He could get Polly to take him to the library and pick out a few. Perhaps he could also find some others who share in his love of gardening, even? Exchange ideas and learn tips for how to better manage all his flowers. Not to mention, Polly is getting married later this year, and she seems delighted by the idea of Basil being there.

Oh, so much to do. So many possibilities. He could even start an entirely new hobby, if he wanted. He doesn’t have to only stick to the things he’s always liked. It’s a new day, after all, and a new Basil.

He takes a deep breath and stands up, looking around at the park around him. Everyone else is going about their lives as normal, it’s time for him to join them.