Archive of Our Own ^beta

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daxii asked:

I found him where I thought I would—head down, water beating over his body as he rinsed the last of the chlorine off himself. He looked shaken, like the world had twisted on its axis, and maybe it had, maybe by some tectonic motion, things had shifted and down had now become up. I slid down the wall opposite the shower and waited, watching him compose himself and slide back on the mask that he showed the world, hiding himself and his insecurities away.

Turning off the water, he turned around and grabbed the towel he’d left for himself, and began to dry off. I just sat, watching, waiting for him to notice that I was there. Eventually, he opened his eyes and saw me. His mask dropped for a second and I saw the worry and the fear and a touch of guilt...I was going to have to fix that.

“Hi...I didn’t hear you come in.” He spoke softly, tentatively.

I stood upright and walked over to him. Taking the towel away from him, I started to dry his hair. “You never do this properly. You’re going to catch cold.” He submitted meekly, letting me do as I would, and I’d had enough.

He tried to speak. “But you…”

“Listen to me. You’re amazing now, and you’re going to be even more so. You shine like the sun out there, you are beautiful to watch, and I am so very proud of you. Don’t worry about needless things. You’ve done nothing wrong, and there’s nothing to feel bad about.” He just watched me with ever widening eyes, wonder replacing guilt and fear. I kissed him briefly before stepping back.

“Now come on, get dressed, you have your public to face.”

I watched with pride from the stands as he ascended the platform, the last member of Japan’s Olympic Team to be introduced.

“Tachibana Makoto”

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Chapter Text

Kuramochi slouched his way down the dirt path between the tents, headed back towards his cell. He and his fellow prisoners were headed back after a day of working in the fields. Harvest was approaching, and the army needed to be fed. He kept himself apart from most of his fellow prisoners; they didn’t trust him. Not that he blamed them, but it was still a little bothersome that he’d sacrificed so much for his adopted homeland and no one could see past the shape of his eyes. He really hadn’t expected much else, and he refused to dwell on it. He just didn’t put himself out there to be rejected.

He was glad that no one, not even his captors, knew what he’d really been doing.

Making his way to the supposed ‘bathing’ facilities, he stopped long enough to rinse his face and hands, dunking his head in the bucket of cold water provided. It woke him up and sharpened his mind, allowing him to shake off the fatigue the day of labor had brought. As he was leaving the tent, he heard the bell for dinner ring, so he headed to the mess tent and got in line with the rest of the inmates. Getting his evening ration of food, he sat to eat, back to the wall of the tent, all entrances in sight. He ate with his eyes always moving, watching the room, always alert. Which is why he jumped when he heard an unfamiliar voice at his elbow.

“Mind if I sit here?”

He turned to face the source, and saw a fellow prisoner, one he’d not seen before, sliding into the spot beside him. “It’s a little late for me to say no, isn’t it?” He responded wryly.

The man beside him let out a low chuckle. “I suppose it is, isn’t it?” He was speaking English, but was clearly as Japanese as Kuramochi; only with the most distinctive head of pink hair he’d ever seen. “Ryousuke Kominato, glad to meet you.”

“Youichi Kuramochi, likewise.” Kuramochi still wasn’t used to the western tradition of given name before family name, but he was getting better. “Where are you from, Kominato?” He also had to work to leave off honorifics; people in the west looked at him oddly without him giving them more ammunition.

“My family’s in New York City, but we’re originally from Kanagawa. How about you?” Kominato responded, and Kuramochi froze momentarily, but tried to keep his movements smooth.

“Last I heard, my family was in San Francisco, but I’ve not seen them for a while. I was born in Hokkaido, though, that’s where most of my relatives live.” Kuramochi responded, the words he’d learned so long ago emerging as truth.

Kominato tilted his head in acknowledgement, and turned his attention back to his meal. Switching to Japanese, he spoke rapidly, low enough that Kuramochi could barely hear him. “You kinda suck, you know? Getting snagged like that. I’m here to get you out.”

Kuramochi grinned at his dinner, nodding his head in agreeance.

This was going to be great.

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Kazuya woke with a start, heart racing. He sat up, breathing hard, feeling as if he’d just run a mile. He felt Mochi rubbing his back, calling his name, but he couldn’t respond at first, couldn’t get the images out of his head. Finally, he caught his breath, leaning into his boyfriend, and he started to talk. “Moch, I couldn’t find him, he was lost and crying and I couldn’t find him, couldn’t reach him, he was so scared so alone...and I couldn’t get to him, it was so dark….”

Mochi wrapped his arms around Kazuya, offering what comfort he could, snuggling close and combing his hand through his head. This was not the first time he’d had this dream, waking nearly inconsolable. Although Mochi was glad Kazuya trusted him, he wished he didn’t have to suffer this. “It’s ok, Kaz, its ok. You’re fine. You’re ok.” He repeated the mantra, hoping to break through the spiral of thoughts that haunted the normally imperturbable pitcher. Kazuya’s breathing finally seemed to slow down, and he slowly regained control.

Sitting up, he wiped at his eyes. “God, I’m sorry, Moch. I have no idea why I keep having that dream, it makes no sense.”

Mochi scoffed. “When do dreams ever make sense, Kaz? I just hate that you have to go through that.” His gentle hands soothed Kazuya, belying his teasing tone. He really hated the dreams, and wanted more than anything to make them stop. “Maybe we should talk about it, though? Maybe it's trying to tell you something?”

“What could it mean, Moch? We’ve found each other, and I don’t know why I’d be dreaming something like that. Must be a throwback to when I was a kid.”

Kazuya had grown up with only his father—his mother had died when he was six. Having a father who’d lost his soulmate was difficult for them both, and Kazuya was alternately ignored and reviled by the father who resented his presence. He hadn’t been very old when his mother died, but he remembered enough to know he’d inherited her looks.

He also always held close her stories about soulmates, about the person who’d have the tattoo that matched the one he had on his hip, the Latin letters a stylized K&Y. He knew from a young age that he would find the person who matched, that they’d be a couple and they would love each other until the end. Finding Mochi, finding that he had the same tattoo, was a gift for which Kazuya was so grateful. The fact that they were friends before they found out, that they shared baseball and the same irritating sense of humor, made things even better. Kazuya had never been good about sharing his feelings, but he’d found that with very little effort he opened up to Mochi.

Mochi, for his part, had been strangely unsurprised when Kazuya cornered him a couple of months into their first year and showed him the mark on his hip that matched the one on Mochi’s shoulder. He’d known for a few years that he preferred boys, and he knew that society didn’t care; the soulmate mark trumped almost everything.

They were both registered with the society, as all infants are required to do, and had been duly and officially matched. They had, however, begged the coaching staff to keep it quiet, not wanting it to affect the team. Seeing the wisdom in that, the faculty kept it secret, not giving them any of the accommodations to which soul mates were entitled. The only thing that they received was the occasional blind eye turned if one or the other was seen leaving the other’s dorm room, and that was enough for the boys.

Until the dreams started, sometime late in the previous summer.

Mochi had no idea what they meant. He knew that he loved Kazuya, and that Kazuya loved him, but he couldn’t help feeling like there was something Kazuya needed that he wasn’t providing. They’d been taking things slowly, they slept together, but hadn’t actually done much more than snuggle and kiss, neither of them feeling like they should rush anything. Now Mochi was reconsidering that, wondering if there was more he should be doing, wondering what was missing. He knew that Kazuya would never admit it, but Mochi felt it as well, like there was some element to their relationship that was not complete, but he’d always put it down to their age and relative inexperience. Now he was no longer convinced.

Now that he’d gotten Kazuya calmed, he lay back down, pulling the boy with him. Kazuya snuggled into his chest, rubbing his stomach in little circles, soothing both himself and Mochi. “I’m sorry, Moch. I don’t know what that’s about. It’s annoying and irritating.”

“Sleep, Kaz, we’ve got practice tomorrow, and the new first years are here.”

“I wonder if that one kid is going to be here, remember? The one who shut Azuma up?”

“I don’t know, but we’ll find out soon enough. Sleep.”

Two days later, Kazuya had his answer. The boy, Sawamura Eijun, was at Seido, and was Mochi’s roommate. He was as loud and brash as Kazuya remembered, with eyes that lit up like suns when he was excited. Mochi was thrilled to have a wrestling partner, and Kazuya was as well, if only so that he was spared some of his boyfriend’s more exuberant moves.

One day, Kazuya was walking to his room after practice when he got a text from Mochi, asking him to come to his room right that minute. Kazuya turned and headed for room 5, wondering what could possibly be that important, although Mochi’d been known to send that text when he just wanted attention, so he wasn’t that worried. He walked into the room to the familiar sight of Eijun being pinned by Mochi.

Mochi looked up and smiled, the widest, happiest smile Kazuya had seen in a while, continuing to hold Eijun pinned, as the younger boy grumbled on the floor. As if he was presenting an offering, Mochi pulled up Eijun’s shirt to the middle of the back. Looking back at Kazuya, he saw the truth and the wonder settle in his eyes, and the rightness settle in his bones.

Kazuya said three words as the truth dawned on him, as the enormity of their mistake sunk in; the same ones Mochi had said right before he had texted him to come over.

“It’s an E.”

Chapter Text

“That’s it, we’re never getting married.” Eijun threw himself into the chair next to Kazuya, crossing his arms and glaring at the flower arrangement that was the cause of his current irritation. “Or if we do, we’re fucking eloping.” He continued to glare, trying to immolate the offending object.

Kazuya snickered at his boy, relaxing as he watched the proceedings. “What’s the matter, Ei? Isn’t this all part of ‘Maid of Honor’ duties? To hold the bride’s hand as she prepares to get married?”

Eijun turned his glare on Kazuya, who recoiled just a fraction under the glare of those golden eyes. “Maybe? But Wakana’s turning into a real bridezilla, and I’m tired of dealing with it. Did you know she decided this morning—this morning, Kaz, when the wedding is in an hour—that she didn’t like the blue that they’d used for the favor ribbons, and wanted me to go see if I could find a different shade, and change them all? I told her she was crazy, of course, but really? And now the flowers?”

“I think she’s just nervous. It will all be fine once this is over. I’m glad that Mochi’s been pretty chill—” He was interrupted by a shrill voice emerging from the room the groom was preparing in.

“What do you mean; you didn’t bring both of the bowties? How am I supposed to decide what to wear when you’re totally incompetent? Go get me a cup of coffee, now!”

Eijun looked at Kazuya, noticing for the first time that he was looking frazzled as well. He raised an eyebrow at his boy, and grinned. “So we have a groomzilla, too?”

Kazuya sighed, and looked chagrined. “He’s nervous, too.” He said, ruefully. “For him though, it’s more about how he looks and less about how other things look. It’s definitely nerves. I’m tempted to send you in there for a quick wrestling match, to calm him down.” Eijun frowned.

“Miyuki Kazuya!” Eijun exclaimed. “Then you can go in and explain to Wakana for the hundredth time that the flowers are perfect, and that she’s gorgeous, and everything’s going to be beautiful.”

“You know...that might not be a bad idea.” Kazuya said, slowly, mind working. “They’re both used to the other one of us, maybe a new face saying the same things would be reassuring?”

“You’re serious?”

Kazuya nodded.

“Well, it can’t hurt.” Eijun said, getting to his feet. “And it might keep us from killing them.”

Kazuya stood as well, and pulled his boy into his arms. “First, Ei. You look amazing in that tuxedo. Second. If we get married, we’re not going to have all this frippery. Third, I love you, and don’t ever forget that, ok?”

Eijun leaned into the embrace, wrapping his arms around Kazuya. “Don’t try that, Kaz. You’re so gorgeous; you steal my breath. And you’re right, if we get married, it won’t be about the flowers or the favors.” He leaned over and kissed Kazuya’s cheek, whispering in his ear. “I adore you, and I can’t wait to get you out of that tux later.”   

Kazuya froze for a second, and then smiled, predatorily. “How is it you can still do that to me after all this time? I will get you back for that, somehow.”

Eijun stepped out of his embrace and headed towards Mochi’s room.

“I’m looking forward to it, Kazuya-senpai.”

Chapter Text

Afterwards, nobody really knew what started it. It was just a normal Saturday afternoon, practice over, and the boys were lounging in Kazuya’s room, just hanging out. Just a normal Saturday afternoon.

Until it wasn’t.

None of them could ever say who started it. Was it Eijun, with his lack of subtlety and thin skin? Was it Mochi, who didn’t always know when to stop, who pushed boundaries as if it was his avocation? Or was it Kazuya, whose sharp tongue and even sharper wit had done more damage than even he knew?

No one knew.

They just knew that suddenly, they were fighting. Eijun was yelling, while Mochi taunted him; Kazuya poked at Mochi until he poked back, furious. There were harsh words and things said that should never be said to someone you care about, let alone that you claimed to love. Lines crossed, pain inflicted, bonds shattered.

And they knew they were at fault.

Eijun was the first to leave. He didn’t want to break down in front of the boys, didn’t want them to see him crying, so he headed towards the door. Shouting a loud goodbye over his shoulder, he slammed the door on his way out. He jogged to the field and spent the rest of the afternoon doing laps, tears streaming the whole time.

He blamed himself.

Mochi was next. In the silence after Eijun left, he and Kazuya stared at each other, neither willing to give an inch. Finally, Mochi broke, and headed for the door, muttering a gruff goodbye as he slammed the door behind himself. He went back to his dorm room and played Mario Kart all afternoon, cheeks wet and eyes blurry the whole time.

He blamed himself.

Kazuya whispered goodbye as he watched first his heart, and then his life leave. He didn’t know what to do, how to fix this. He didn’t even understand what had happened. He just knew that they were gone, that he was alone. And that there was nothing he could do about it. He spent the afternoon lying on his bed, weeping over the breaking of his world, unable to see any way to bring things back to good.

He blamed himself.

Eijun curled up in the dugout. He was exhausted from running and crying, and needed to sleep, but he couldn’t go back to his room where Kuramochi was, so he found a place that was fairly flat and fell asleep.

Mochi waited up for Eijun, wanting to make sure he was all right. When he didn’t show up, he checked the fields to see if he was still running. Not finding him there, he went to the only place he could think of, Kazuya’s room. Kazuya was curled up, asleep, when Mochi let himself in, and Eijun was nowhere to be seen.

Mochi got closer to him, preparing to shake him awake, when he saw the tracks of the tears on his face. Sighing, he covered Kazuya up with a blanket and kissed his forehead, heading out to find the other boy.

Heading back out to the field, sure he’d missed Eijun, he saw the flash of something yellow in the dugout. Heading over that way, he found his missing boy curled up on the floor. He bent over and rubbed his cheek, wiping the tears and the dirt off. Eijun didn’t move. Smiling ruefully, he lifted the other boy and half carried, half walked him back to Kazuya’s room.

Tucking him into bed, he climbed in behind him, wrapping both of the boys in his arms. Tomorrow, they’d have to figure it out. Tomorrow would be rough. But for now, they were all exactly where they belonged.

Chapter Text

Broken...permanent damage...unknown prognosis...possibly unusable...the thoughts pounded in Eijun’s head, aided by the ache that seemed to beat in time with his blood pounding through his veins.

It was so fucking stupid. A flubbed pitch that was hit hard, straight at him, an outstretched arm that wasn’t withdrawn in time, and as a result, a broken wrist, his left wrist, his pitching wrist. He sat in the emergency room, waiting for the doctors to tell him if they could set it, or if he’d need surgery and the endless physio afterwards.

He just wanted someone to tell him he’d be able to pitch again.

What was he without baseball?

He wasn’t smart. He didn’t have any other talents.

What was he going to do without baseball?

What was this going to do to his relationship with Kazuya?

What did he have left, if he lost baseball?

He felt the tears start. He was alone in the room; Coach Oota was off filling out papers. He had accompanied him in the ambulance—the injury had happened during the fifth inning of the game, and he was sure that the game was still going. Seido had been up by two, but their opponents were fighting hard.

He was so scared. He didn’t know anything.

The pain medication was starting to kick in, and he started to drift a bit, still unsure of what was going on with his wrist. He relaxed into the bed, mind whirling and yet somehow distant. As he began to fall asleep, he heard someone come in the room and felt them take his hand. Forcing his eyes open, he looked into Kazuya’s worried eyes. “Kazu.” he whispered. “What do I have if I lose baseball?”

Kazuya’s eyes flooded. “Idiot. You have me, of course. Now sleep, I love you.” He brushed back Eijun’s hair and planted a kiss in his forehead.

Eijun roused enough to ask one more question. “Who won?”

“We did. Called game. Everyone wanted to get it over so they could check on you. I’ve never seen them all play so hard or well. It was called after the seventh inning; they’re all out in the waiting room now.” Kazuya grinned, and it finally registered that he was still in his uniform. “Now sleep, Eijun. We’ll all be here for you when you wake up.”

He smiled and drifted off; Kazuya had reminded him of what he had, even without baseball.

He had a team. And that was enough.

Chapter Text

“Man, I was such a dweeb in high school!” I laughed, looking at the picture on the wall.

Eijun knocked me in the side. “You just graduated last year, Mochi. It’s not like you’re one of the ob’s in the stands.” I couldn’t argue with him there, unfortunately.

“Duh, but I was still a dweeb.”

“I do not think you have quite overcome the dweebishness.” A new voice joined our conversation, a voice I hadn’t heard in a couple of years, a voice I’d love to hear every day of my life. Turning to the side, I grinned.

“Hello, Ryou!” I started, trying to keep myself from babbling inanely or shouting out a confession on the spot.

“Oniisan-senpai!” Eijun exclaimed. “I’m so glad you could make it back.” Those of us alumni who were close enough had returned for the celebration: Seido, with Sawamura as captain and ace, had won summer Koshien. We were all happy for them of course, and I wasn’t surprised, after our win last year, the team had only gotten stronger.

“Congratulations, Captain-ace.” Ryou smiled at Eijun. “Enjoy your retirement.”

Eijun’s face fell. I knew how he felt; no one wants to give up their team. “You’re going to Hosei, right?” I asked.

“Yeah. They recruited Kazuya and me last year.” He smiled. I couldn’t believe how much Eijun had matured since I left; he’d managed to get both his pitch and himself under control.

“Well that’s convenient.” Ryou snarked. “As well as nice for you, no worries about the tests.”

“I know, right? But I’m still going to study and take them; I want to be as ready as I can for uni.” Eijun grinned at both of us and with a small wave, moved on.

I turned my attention completely on Ryou. I’d missed him, so much. I’d had a crush on him since I was a first year, but he’d always seemed just out of reach. I wondered if I’d ever feel like that distance was breached.

“So, how is Todai?” I asked Ryou. He’d gone there to play baseball and to study chemistry. I wasn’t sure if that was reassuring or scary. It depended on the day, I think.

He smirked. “A lot less work than Seido was. The team practices are nothing, and I don’t have a rookie partner to try and whip into shape.” I bristled, glaring. “Really, though, I miss our partnership. We were brilliant together.”

“We could still be.” I heard the words come from my mouth, but I didn’t realize that I’d said them. Which sounds really stupid, but I swear it’s the truth.

“What exactly are you suggesting? Or should I say proposing?” He purred at me, all bristly cat and so fucking perfect I couldn’t stand it.

I snorted and shook my head. “You know what I’m asking, Ryou. I’ve crushed on you since I was a first year, and I thought it might go away, but it hasn’t. Would you like to go out for dinner sometime?”

“Under one condition. Can you promise me that?” He asked.

“I’ll do my best for you, always.” I answered, unsure what he wanted, but willing to try.

He opened his eyes and looked at me, stealing my breath and any semblance of free will I might have had when it came to him. “The condition is this: tonight. Sometime is tonight.” I babbled out something in agreement; he grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the celebration.

I waved at Eijun as we passed, and he shot me a wink and a thumbs-up.

Damn punk, if I didn’t have someone, I mean something better to do, he’d have been pinned to the ground.

Lucky for him, I was already occupied.

Chapter Text

Haruichi sat on the bench, slouched down just enough so he could rest his nape on the back of the bench. His head was tilted at the sky, eyes watching the clouds skitter across his vision. The wind was picking up, it was going to storm soon. He didn’t even register what he was looking at, instead, all he could see was his bat missing the ball, his swing wide, the last strike in a game that put them out of the Spring Koshien. He knew that it wasn’t all his fault, that the other team members all felt the same, that they’d somehow let themselves down, that they’d failed. But it still stung, he still wanted and wished for a different outcome, wondered if he’d ever be good enough, if he was destined to be seen as the nice boy with pink hair and a wooden bat for the rest of his career. He didn’t want that, and he didn’t ever want to feel this level of culpability again. He sighed deeply when he felt someone sit beside him. He wasn’t much in the mood for company, and sliding his eyes over, he prepared to tell the interloper so.

Furuya sat beside him and not Eijun, the person he’d expect to seek him out. It was Furuya, looking as lost as he ever had, dark eyes downcast. Clearly he was in the same place as Haruichi, unable to allow himself the freedom to let it go, let the game fade and allow the future to become important again, allow the past to become exactly that, the past.

Slowly, Furuya lifted his head and joined Haruichi, looking at the sky. After a while, he spoke. “You know, it’s okay to cry.”

“Yes, Furuya-kun, I know that.”

“It’s ok to feel bad or feel sad.”

“I know that as well.”

“I don’t like feeling like this.”

“Neither do I, Furuya, neither do I.”

“We should do something about it.”

“What did you have in mind?”

Furuya was silent for a while, and then whispered. “I don’t know.”

“Neither do I.”

Turning their attention back to the sky, they watched the storm roll in.

Chapter Text

Eijun looked in the mirror one more time, inspecting himself, making sure that everything was in place. He was determined that this time, this one time, he was going to look perfect. His senpai deserved it. He deserved it.

It was graduation day.

After today, he would be a third year. But more importantly, after today they would be gone. Off to college or work or wherever life took them. He couldn’t think too much about it; he didn’t want to cry, not now, not in front of them. He’d done enough of it—behind the shed, behind the practice building, anywhere he was sure of some privacy. He didn’t want them to know how much he was going to miss them.

He didn’t want him to know how much he was going to miss him.

Stepping out of his room he went to the cafeteria, where the rest of the team was waiting for him, their captain. He knew he had to say something, so he spoke as best he could to his team.

“We’re losing the senpai today, permanently. But it doesn’t matter where they go, they will always be our teammates. Let’s go out there and show them how much we appreciate all that they’ve done for us!”

Together, as a team, they walked out to the lawn where the chairs were lined up, waiting for the guests and the graduates. As a block they all sat together in their designated seats, and as the team members walked, they made as much noise as they could.

Finally, it was over, and the graduates made their way through the crowd to their friends. Hugging, crying, laughing with each other, taking selfies and snapchats and videos. Through it all, Eijun stood to one side, watching, not joining.

“You’re not even going to tell me goodbye?” Eijun jumped at the voice in his ear. Spinning, he saw Kazuya standing there, grinning. He glared.

“Not if you’re going to be sneaking up on me, you shitty senpai!” Eijun retorted.

Kazuya smirked. “I have something for you, brat.” He held out his hand. Eijun held out his hand palm up, and Kazuya dropped a button into it. His hand closed around it in a fist.

“Dammit, Kaz, I promised you I wouldn’t cry. You’re not making this easy.”  

“I know, I’m sorry. I just...well, I want you to know how much I’m going to miss you, wanted to give you something so you won’t forget me.”

“As if I could ever forget you, Miyuki Kazuya. You’re more likely to forget me.”

“Not a chance, Ei, not even the slightest chance. This isn’t the end for us, not even close.” Kazuya pulled his boy in for a hug, relishing the closeness and wishing he never had to let go.

“Wait for me, Kaz.”

“Until the end of time.”

Chapter Text

“There’s blood on your hands.”

Kuramochi looked at them and hissed. “Dammit, I thought I got it all off. Sorry, Ryou.”

“Don’t apologize, idiot, just fix it. If anyone figures out what’s going on, we’re both going to be sorrier than you can possibly imagine.”

Stepping back to the sinks, Kuramochi stuck his hands back under the stream, scrubbing harder at the stains still visible. Watching the pink water drain away, he forced his mind and body to relax. Being tense was just going to get them killed, or worse, captured.

“If you’re quite finished pampering yourself, we should probably consider leaving before the alarm is raised.” Ryou deadpanned, watching Kuramochi closely for any sign of panic or distress.

“Seriously? I’ve got it off, let’s go.” Kuramochi pushed past his partner and headed for the door.

Ryou laid a hand on his arm, halting him in his tracks. “Youichi. Look at me.”

Kuramochi turned towards him. He couldn’t help it, that voice in that tone always stopped him, and he always did whatever it told him to.

He lifted his eyes to meet Ryou’s, which were not their usual slits, but open and shining, a beautiful red that matched his natural hair color. No wonder Ryou constantly squinted his eyes closed; if anyone saw them, they’d remember. The darker color he’d dyed his hair would be a total waste of time and money, the’d know him for his eyes alone.

Ryou stepped into his space, sliding a hand along Kuramochi’s jaw. “Listen to me. Whatever happens, remember two things: Don’t look back, and don’t wait for me if we get separated. I will find you. I will, I promise. Get out of here, and don’t ever come back.” He softly laid a kiss on Kuramochi’s lips, silencing whatever protest he had formulated. “Three things. Remember that I love you, Kuramochi Youichi, and always will.”

He stepped back and held out his hand. “You ready?”

Kuramochi took it, and grinned at his partner. “For you, Ryou? Always.”

“Ok, then. Let’s go.”

Together, they stepped through the door.

Chapter Text

They laid together in a pile, limbs intertwined, hands rubbing heads, backs, whatever’s in reach, just relaxing together, enjoying the day and each other’s company, talking about nothing in particular.

“If you could be anything or anyone, what would it be?” Kazuya asked, it was his turn to ask the next question in the conversation.

“I think it would be cool to be a superhero, you know, doing good and saving people and stuff. Plus the fighting the bad guy, I’d love to do that.” Mochi started, gesticulating wildly without actually hitting any of them. He’d had lots of practice in the last few months, ever since Kazuya had cornered them both to ask them if they’d consider trying out a relationship with him. They’d agreed, and after some adjustments, it seemed to be working fairly smoothly. They were still getting to know each other, and these discussion sessions—which frequently turned into light make-out sessions—were an important part of that.

“Ohhhhhhh! Mochi, that sounds so cool!” Eijun enthused. “You’d be good at it, too, you could just wrestle them all into submission.”

Kazuya smothered a laugh. He adored the younger boy, he really did. His open heart and enthusiasm were part of the things that had drawn him to Eijun, but sometimes he was a little much. Never really irritating, just so very...present. “What about you, Ei?” He waited for him to spout some nonsense about aces or a manga character or something.

“I have contemplated becoming a hermit,” Eijun said with a grin. The other two just stared, jaws dropping.

“A hermit,” Kazuya deadpanned.

“Yes, a hermit,” Eijun affirmed.

“Are you sure about that, Eijun? I’m not sure the monk life is for you,” Mochi interjected. The two boyfriends looked at each other, befuddled.

“Not a monk, Mochi, a hermit . You know, the green guy in that movie we saw that moved to Hollywood and rode a bike? He had a girlfriend? He’s been in a lot of movies, too. Treasure Island? And something about Christmas.”

Kazuya couldn’t hide his laugh this time, it was startled out of him.

“Ohhhhhh! You mean Kermit . The frog? The puppet?”

“He’s not a puppet, Miyuki Kazuya, he rides a bike! Puppets don’t ride bikes. He just seems like a nice guy, even if he is a frog. I’d like to be like that.”

Kazuya smiled wryly and reached over, rubbing Eijun’s head. “You don’t have to want to be like that, you’re already a nice guy.”

“He’s right, for once. You’re our nice guy,” Kuramochi agreed, pulling them both closer for more snuggles.

Chapter Text

Tetsu unlocked the door and stepped into the apartment, locking the door behind him and stowing his stuff in the closet. Hearing laughing voices in the kitchen, he made his way there to find his boyfriends making out at the dining room table, Chris straddling Jun’s legs and enthusiastically kissing his boy.

“Not that this isn’t a scene that’s starred in many of my fantasies, but what’s going on? Chris, are you drunk?” Tetsu asked, both perplexed and amused. Chris, while fairly affectionate normally, was so reserved that the idea of him climbing on Jun’s lap to kiss him so enthusiastically was the stuff of fantasy and only happened when he’d had a good bit to drink.

Chris broke off the kiss and looked over at Tetsu, smiling the broadest smile he’d ever seen from the boy. Climbing off of Jun’s lap, he left the still stunned boy seated and walked over to Tetsu.

“I’ve not been drinking, Tetsu, really.” Chris slid his arms around Tetsu’s neck, slipping into his space, snuggling his face into Tetsu’s neck. “I love you, you know that?”

Tetsu’s arms wrapped around his boy automatically, and he pulled him closer. “And I love you. Now what’s going on? What’s got you so...affectionate?”

Chris pulled away with a slight pout. “I can’t hug or kiss my boyfriends without my sobriety and sanity being questioned? What kind of world do we…” He busted out a laugh. “I’m sorry. I can’t even go there with that.

“I got some news today. The doctor’s say I’m completely healed, so that’s good. And the timing is perfect—I’ve been asked to join the Swallow’s farm team for the coming season.”

Tetsu’s eyes widened, and he wrapped Chris in a tight hug. “Oh my god, that’s amazing news. No wonder you’re so happy, I’m tempted to go sit on Jun’s lap and make out with him myself, and I’m just hearing your news. I’m so happy for you. I think, though, that we can do one better, don’t you?

“Grab Jun—he’s still not with us, and let’s go celebrate.”

Chris smiled in anticipation. “Meet you there, Tetsu. And I might be persuaded to sit on your lap this time.”

Tetsu returned the grin and watched as Chris dragged the recovering Jun down the hallway towards their room, turning to his bags to retrieve the bottle of Champagne he’d bought on the way home after getting Jun’s text.

This was going to be great.

Chapter Text

Kazuya decided that the afternoon was the perfect time to run, and the practice field was the perfect place to do so. It had nothing to do with the fact that the school parking lot was visible from the whole field, or that the team was expected back that afternoon after a long training camp, one that the retired third years did not attend.

It had nothing to do with that at all. Nothing.

He just felt like running, and if he watched the parking lot closely, it was because he was sharpening his observational skills, trying to guess who was doing what out there. Really.

It wasn’t because Eijun had been gone for nearly a week. It really wasn’t.

He had no real reason for the picnic lunch he’d packed, or the cake he baked that afternoon. He’d been in the mood to bake, that’s all. No other reason. And a picnic was just something that sometimes sounded like fun, so he thought it might be a good evening for it. No other reason at all.

He ran, and continued to run even as he saw the bus pull in and the passengers unload. He stopped running and narrowed his eyes as he saw Eijun step off the bus and look around, shoulders slumping a little when he didn’t see anyone there to meet them. He didn’t have a twinge of guilt in his stomach, he’d just not eaten yet, he was waiting.

He headed back to the dorms and stopped when he saw Eijun walking down the hall towards his room, bag slung over his shoulder. He looks tired. I hope he’s okay.

As he stepped into the hall, Eijun looked up. Meeting his boy’s eyes, seeing the gold start to gleam, he admitted to himself that he was a bit of an idiot. I missed him so much. I can’t let him know, though.

“Miyuki Kazuya! I thought you were going to meet the bus, I was afraid there was something wrong.” Eijun shifted his bag nervously, playing with the straps.

“Why? It’s not like I missed you or anything.” Kazuya lied with a smirk. “Did you miss me, Ei-chan?”

“Don’t be such an ass, Kazuya.” Eijun stepped up to him, much more relaxed now that he realized that his boy was fine, he was just being his usual self. “You know I did, every minute.” He dropped his bag and wrapped his arms around Kazuya, burying his head in his neck. Kazuya’s arms came up and pulled Eijun in tightly.

Burying his face in Eijun’s shoulder, relaxing for what felt like the first time in days, Kazuya whispered.

“I was miserable, I missed you too.”

Chapter Text

Eijun slumped over in his chair, resting his head on the table.

“It’s been such a long day, Haruichi, and I’m tired. Can you help me understand what’s going on?”

Haruichi put down the book he was reading and looked at his best friend.

“First of all, we’re in the library, you need to be quieter. Secondly, I don’t know what you’re talking about. What class are you stuck in?” He thought that maybe he did know what Eijun was on about, but he was hoping it was as simple as a math problem, rather than what he suspected.

“It’s Kazuya.” Haruichi sighed. It wasn’t that Eijun was always asking him for advice about their relationship, but he’d done it enough that Haruichi could predict when it was coming.

“What’s he done now?” Eijun occasionally needed an interpreter, someone who could explain Kazuya’s actions to him, because he wasn’t really good at understanding them sometimes. He expected everyone to be working from the same experiences he was, and things could get confusing for him. Haruichi didn’t really mind, but he wished Eijun would get smarter about this stuff.

“He’s acting weird. I mean, we’ve been together for a while, and I know I’m not the smartest person around, but he gets kinda standoffish when I tell him I care about him, or when things get emotional between us. He shuts down, Haruichi, and I don’t want to press him or force him into something. But I don’t get it.”

Well, at least this wasn’t just him being stupid, it was really something that he needed to understand, and Haruichi knew that if he could explain it correctly, Eijun would be fine. He could be exceedingly empathetic if he understands where you’re coming from, it just needed to be explained to him.

“This is important, Eijun. You know he lost his mom, and that his father’s never at any games or school functions, right? And those are people who are supposed to love him, supposed to support him. I think it’s probably always been like that for him. With a family like that, how could anyone not be afraid of love? All he knows of it is disappointment and pain.”

Eijun’s face fell, and he thought, hard. “You’re right, Haruichi, as usual.” He nodded emphatically. “So how do I help him?”

“I don’t know if you can, to tell you the truth. You just have to be patient with him and show him that you’re not leaving. He’ll get there on his own.”

Eijun smiled at Haruichi. “Thank you, you’re a lifesaver. I don’t know what I’d do without you, you’re such a good friend for helping me and putting up with my stupid questions.”

Haruichi blushed. Eijun was sometimes an idiot, but he had a heart as big as the world, and at the end of the day, that was the important thing.

“Now about the quadratic equation…”

Chapter Text

I made my way through the crowded hotel ballroom, smiling repeatedly at the well-wishers, agreeing that yes, they did make a wonderful couple, pressing drinks into hands, and accepting second hand congratulations from those who hadn’t yet been able to approach the newlyweds.

Plastering yet another smile on my face, I wandered towards the back of the room, looking for a convenient curtain to hide myself behind, someplace I could be unnoticed and undisturbed.

My father had gotten remarried, and although I thought the person he chose was a lovely lady, she was only a decade older than I am and I wasn’t quite sure how I felt about the whole situation. I’d successfully avoided thinking or speaking about it, and now it was hitting me, and I didn’t have anyone to talk to about it, at least not here.

The person I most wanted to talk to was not welcome at this wedding.

I almost didn’t go myself, declaring, determined to stand my ground, to force my father to acknowledge Eijun, but he, in his big hearted wisdom, refused to allow me my rebellion, instead insisting, no demanding, that I went. He rarely asks me for anything, and he is so careful not to intrude on my life, try to force my actions, that when he does so I have no power to resist.

So there I sat, back to the french doors that lined the wall, just marking time until I could politely go home and crawl into sweats and onto Eijun’s lap.

I was lost in thought when I heard someone pull up a chair beside me, and heard a voice. “So this is where you’ve hidden yourself, Kazuya.”

Looking over, I smiled at the one person I was glad to see here. “Hello, Grandfather. Yes, you’ve found me.”

“Where’s Eijun?” He asked, looking around, like he expected the boy to come out from behind the curtains.

“He wasn’t invited.” I didn’t even try to keep the bitterness out of my voice.

Grandfather sighed. “Your father’s an idiot. I’m glad you came, though. It’s wonderful to see you, although I’m surprised that you did.”

“Eijun made me. I wasn’t going to.”

“Typical of Ei-chan. I really like him, Kazuya. He’s good for you. Keep him.”

“As he’s reminded me upon occasion, he’s not a stray, Grandfather. But I do intend on keeping him around as long as I can.”

‘That’s good, I know he thinks the world of—” Grandfather broke off, and smiled, getting to his feet. “Well, I’ve talked your ear off long enough. Come visit the next time you’re in Nagano, ok?”

I stood as well, “We will, Grandfather. It was lovely to see you.” He wrapped me in a hug, patting me on my back.

“Don’t worry about staying much later, Kazuya, you can leave when you’re ready.”

“I will, soon.”

“Good.” He smiled at me, and then looked over my shoulder at the window. “Like now?”

I heard a knock on the door and spun around to see Eijun on the patio, dressed in a suit, smiling widely. I grinned at him as he motioned me to step outside.

My Grandfather patted my back as he strolled off, and I opened the door to step out into the warmth of the night.

Chapter Text

Kazuya fell onto his couch with a sigh. “The universe hates me.”

“No, you’re just a lazy idiot who waited until the last possible chance  to take your science requirement.” Kuramochi replied, without a shred of sympathy.

“I did, you’re right. But! I did not make them fill those classes up so quickly, or put the only physics class during the same time period as my advanced calculus class. I don’t want to take chemistry.”

“There’s always bio, Kaz.”

Kazuya shuddered. “No thank you.”

Kuramochi laughed. “Then it’s chemistry for you, my friend, I hope you like potions.”

Eijun leaned forward in his chair, plopping his head on the table in front of himself. “What was I thinking, Haruichi?” he whined.

“You weren’t, Eijun. That’s the problem.”

“I knew I needed that class, but I didn’t think I’d have to take it this year, I thought I had time.”

“Eijun, you know you need other chemistry classes for your degree. You’ve got to take the first one sometime.” Haruichi tried to make his friend see sense.

Eijun whined, “I know ! I just thought it could be later.”

“Like when? You’re already a sophomore.”

“I know! I don’t know !” Eijun wailed.

Kazuya walked into the first day of class with a backpack and a smirk. Looking around the room, his eyes fell on a boy sitting alone at a table, daydreaming. Immediately intrigued by his golden eyes, he walked over and slung his backpack on the table, startling the boy out of his thoughts. He looked into those eyes and held out a hand.

“Miyuki Kazuya.”

“Sawamura Eijun.”

“Nice to meet you, partner. ”

Chapter Text

“I don’t fucking believe it.” I watched in amazement as Shinji downed his fifth shot of tequila. “How are you even still alive?”

“No idea.” Shinji slurred a little, but not much. “But I’m glad I am.”

It was his birthday, and i’d taken him out to get drunk. Joke was on me, though, he was still sober. I, however, was currently feeling no pain.  

“I’m glad toooo,” I singsonged. “If you weren’t around, what would I dooooo?”

He snorted into his sixth?seventh? shot. “Probably fail and get kicked out of college and off the team.”

“Mean. Rude.” I sipped my beer. Oddly enough, we had been recruited by Hosei out of Seido, the only ones from our class, so here we were. I’d been scouted by a few other schools, but I wanted to get a degree in Literature, and Hosei had the course I wanted. Shinji’s story was the same, only with Medicine.

We’d been roommates for the last few years, and we got along just fine. A few issues here or there, but generally we did well together.

“Eijun? Can I ask you something?” My head shot up and I stared at him, maybe he was drunker than I thought? He seemed hesitant, and I didn’t want him to feel that way, he rarely asked me anything personal.

“Sure, anything.”

“What’s really going on between you and Miyuki?”

I sighed. I thought he, of all people, believed me. “Nothing. Like I’ve said a million times. He’s my catcher. He’s one of my best friends, but that’s it. I can’t say there wasn’t some...experimentation at Seido, but two things came from that: One, we were better off as friends, and two, he’s not as gay as he thought he was. As soon as he saw Wakana, he never looked back. I’m fine with it. Rejection hurts, no matter how right it is, you know? It didn’t bother me for long.”

“I’m sorry.” Shinji stared into his glass, like all the answers lay at the bottom. “I just had to make sure. I’m sorry about the rejection thing, too. I know how that hurts, no matter how gently they do it.” Toujou. Toujou had broken Shinji’s heart when he’d started dating Nabe, although I hadn’t known until then that Toujou knew how he felt about him.

Wait, there was something I was missing…”Why did you have to make sure?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah. Man, I really must be drunk if I’m talking to you about it.”

“About what?” I was still confused.

Shinji slid his hand across the table and intertwined our fingers.

Oh, that.  

“I’m hella interested, Shinji, I’ve been that way for a long time. But you’re drunk. If you remember, talk to me about it when you’re sober.”

“Ok.” He leaned over to kiss me, and I let him.

I woke up in his bed, with his arms around me, and his voice in my ear. “I remember.”

At least one of us did.