Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Eugene wasn’t entirely sure why his office had become the new hang out center for his friends, but he wasn’t complaining.

Well, it was annoying when he had paperwork to fill out and Kiera and Catalina were throwing darts over his head, aiming at one of his old wanted posters. And it was a bit frustrating when Varian decided to hang over his shoulder and spell check his work, and add his own personal thoughts to whatever case the captain was working on. It was also distracting when Lance made himself comfortable on the old couch in the corner to read old cookbooks and critique the recipes out loud, asking Eugene for his own thoughts.

At least Rapunzel couldn’t annoy him. She spent most of the time happily sketching, doodling, or getting caught up on her own work.

Eugene was currently ignoring the bickering between Kiera and Lance over some korean recipe book Lance had imported and focused on processing a run of the mill b&e. Some thief broke into one of the wealthier homes in the capital, stole some jewelry and clothes, was seen by the maid working, left footprints, and pawned off the loot in the same town not even a day later. Needless to say, the pathetic excuse for a criminal was caught. A mere five hours after the crime. Eugene would feel bad for him if the situation weren’t so hilarious.

“I have to say, as a former thief, I’m almost offended by how bad a job this was.” The captain handed the file over to Varian who was reading over his shoulder, “ever since I’ve been out of the game, it feels like thieves have gotten lazier- no offense girls.” A dart narrowly missed his ear as Kiera half-heartedly scowled at him.

“Maybe that’s a good thing” Rapunzel muttered as she finished the small painting she had been working on. A vase of lilies on a small piece of parchment intended for Catalina to hang in her room.

“Your change of heart is inspiring others, like it did with Lance and the girls. You should be happy.”
Eugene wanted to make a comment about how it wasn’t a change of heart that was affecting Corona, more of a ‘criminals these days are too lazy’ but he wasn’t going to ruin Rapunzel's sweet sentiment.

Varian however…

“Or they just suck” he snorted as he read over the file. “Seriously, even I could have pulled off a much better heist, even without my alchemy. This is just sad.” He set the file now full of spelling and grammar corrections down and began taking a bite out of the bagel on the desk that was very much not his.

Lance made a noise of agreement followed with “criminals these days.”

And as much as Eugene wanted to agree with Varian, he couldn’t resist the temptation to rib at the small child who was now currently taking his fill of Eugene’s lunch.

“Oh please, the only time you ever stole anything you had to trick Rapunzel into helping you.”

The princess in question gave Eugene a flat look, but he continued “you may have been an angsty teenage villain when you were fourteen but you used up all your criminal points then. Don’t forget that time you apologized to a wall after running into it. You’d make an awful thief.”

“That was one time!” The pathetic alchemist squawked. “Besides, I was stealing an incredibly valuable, well hidden item owned by the royal family, if I was trying to steal a normal item from a normal person, I could totally pull it off” Varian then did that sweeping hand motion he thought looked cool, it didn’t.

“I believe you little buddy, I think you’d make a great thief.” Lance chimes in, now fully invested in this conversation.

Catalina joined in with an affirming nod and Kiera chimed in with a “meh.”

Eugene took the bagel from Varians grasp and was about to retort with another sassy comment before rapunzel and her moral compass also decided to chime in.

“Varian’s a good kid now, he’s left his criminal life behind him. Varian I don’t think you would make a good thief, you’re too good of a person.”

A sweet sentiment, sure, but Sunshine was conveniently forgetting about the time Varian poured blue dye into Eugene’s shampoo. That time being this morning. She was also conveniently not noticing Varian start to pick at the berries in Eugene’s lunch and toss them into his mouth with all the cockiness a seventeen year old could have. Which was surprisingly a lot for a kid that apologized for drinking water too loud at dinner.

“I’m just saying, not that I would ever do it, but I would make a much better thief than all these guys Eugene arrests. I’ve always been good at strategy and planning.”

That must be why he wins every card game ever, despite Eugene and Lance knowing all the best ways to cheat.

“I’d probably be the best thief in Corona.”

Now that was too far. Eugene was almost inclined to side with him, considering Varians history of stealing, both flowers and queens, but the best?

“Oh ho ho ho kid. I am hesitant to agree with such a claim. Need I remind you that I once held the title of the best thief in Corona? Do you really think you can best me?”

Lance made a noise of indignation but Eugene tuned it out in order to focus on making his face and voice as smug as possible.

“Eugene-“ the princess started but Eugene tuned her out as well, focusing on watching the cogs turn in Varians head.

After a few seconds the captain was sure Varian would say something akin to ‘Yeah you’re totally right, I could never reach to your level and I’m foolish for ever thinking I could. As an apology, I’m going to go make you a sandwich and I agree to let you play around with my toolbox for the rest of the week. If you want, I’ll even get my dad to make you his famous apple pie’

Unfortunately what actually came out of Varians mouth was much more in character.

“I bet I could steal from you.”

The air was sucked out of the room with such a hubristic comment. Lance stilled, his jaw going slack. Rapunzels eyes went wide with what could only be described as pure shock. The young girls next to her also froze, but their shock was mixed with a sense of excitement. Pascal and Ruddiger woke up from their nap as the air in the room suddenly shifted from light and breezy to cold and tense as they too gawked at the teenager.

Eugene, gobsmacked, could only laugh.

“You-you think you could- sunshine darling tell me I heard this wrong. Hairstripe here thinks he can steal from me? The former best of the best? The captain of the guard?”

“No, you heard him right” the Princess tentatively replied, still not quite recovered from the shock.

Eugene wanted to be offended, he really did, and he was in a way. He may have completely abandoned his former life, but to claim that you could be a better thief than Flynn Rider? Clearly defeating Zhan Tiri and essentially being adopted by the royal family was giving the alchemist a big head. First the kid was taking his food, now he wanted to take his former title as best thief? What next? His job? His horse? His Rapunzel?

(Okay that one was a little bit too far; but he distinctly remembered the romantic evening he had planned that had to be postponed because Rapunzel wanted to coddle the young alchemist who had caught a bad case of the sniffles. Granted it was Eugene’s idea to let Varian sleep in their bed that night but that was besides the point.)

What gave Varian the right to make such a claim? The kid who passed out at the sight of blood and refuses to eat ham sandwiches with the crusts on genuinely thinks he could steal from Prince Captain Eugene Flynn Rider Horace Fitzherbert?

But aside from the offense he took at the statement, Eugene was almost giddy at hearing such a pride filled, hubristic, idiotic statement. He couldn’t stop the laugh from coming out of him at full force.

“Do you really think you could steal from me?”
“I’m positive I can.”
“Need I remind you of who I am? I was stealing from nobility when you were in diapers.”
“Who you were, Eugene” Rapunzel tutted.
“Yeah and you’re old and rusty and have a moral compass now. I’m young and smarter than you could ever dream of being.”
“Do you not have a moral compass too or something?”
“No comment.”

“What if you made a bet?” Lance joined in, successfully ending the mini stand off between the two.

“Ooh yeah, like if Varian can steal from Gene then he can, I don’t know, get a prize. But if he can’t then he has to accept defeat which is like, his worst nightmare.” Catalina added.

Varian was about to interject that actually his worst nightmare was the time Lance asked Varian to inspect a rash on his back in nothing but a towel, but he decided to agree.

“If I can successfully steal something of value from you, Eugene, by midnight tonight, then you have to publicly state in front of all of Corona that I am smarter than you, better than you, and the greatest genius in Corona. And if I lose, I will do the same for you.”

Eugene gave the kid a flat look “yeah I’m not saying all that, how about I just publicly declare you an amazing human/genius and call it a night?”

“That’s good too.”

Before Rapunzel could interfere with her moral compass and rationality, the two shook hands.

“May the best thief win.” Eugene added, his voice dripping with smugness.

“I will.” Varian added, blatantly copying Eugene’s expression and tone.

Dangit Eugene really loved this kid.

Chapter Text

The item to be thieved had been agreed upon by Varian and Eugene. It was a medal given to the Captain for his service in the fight against Zhan Tiri. Varian had also gotten one, but this one was specifically made by Rapunzel, making it extra special.

Eugene was happy that this specific item had been chosen. Yes, it was incredibly important to him and he didn’t want anything to happen to it-specifically anything Varian related to happen. But the item was safely in Eugene’s office, the office that was on the second floor of the castle and was occupied by the captain himself for the rest of the day.
The only time he planned to be out was for a meeting scheduled in the later afternoon, but fortunately Varian was also to be at said meeting.

The heist was leaning in Eugene’s favor.

A knock on his door followed by the creaking of it opening alerted him to his wonderful fiancées presence. She didn’t look happy.

“Hey Blondie how did your meeting go?”
“Don’t you think you’re being a little hard on Varian?”

Eugene stopped, and sighed.

“He’ll be fine Rapunzel. If he loses, all he has to do is call me an Amazing Human/Genius in front of all of Corona. I think he can bear the humiliation of such a defeat”

Rapunzels glare hardened as she replied. “I don’t think he can bear the humiliation of admitting defeat to a group of people who are divided on whether or not he even deserves to be out of the dungeons.”

Eugene stopped, and chewed his lip thoughtfully. Rapunzel had a point. Varian had a head full of false confidence that shattered easily.
He also had a kingdom populated by certain people who would mercilessly torment him for something like this.

Sure, at first this could be just a simple bet, but it could also easily escalate and mess with the progress the deeply insecure teen had made in terms of self confidence.

But Varian also claimed he could be a better thief than Flynn Rider and claimed he was smarter than Eugene.

“Your father made it illegal for people to harass Varian, ever since then the violence has stopped. And if something happens, then his tormentors will have to face the royal family plus Lance and Quirins collected wrath. I’m sure Varian will be fine.”

Rapunzel didn’t look convinced. But Eugene was right, Frederick had made the mistreatment of Varian during his outings in Corona illegal. Since then, he hadn’t faced anything more than some hurtful comments.

(Technically hurting Varian in particular wasn’t illegal, but Frederick had signed the decree, stating it punishable with a fine of ten thousand gold to harass palace staff due to past criminal charges, with the child who had been sobbing in Rapunzel's arms after being attacked at the time, in mind)

Besides, by now most of Corona had forgiven Varian. It was only a few groups of people who genuinely despised him. And even the people who didn’t like Varian knew better than to attack or harass him at this point. He wasn’t the most popular, but people knew he was very close with the princess and queen, along with the captain of the guard and certain high standing members of Corona, like Xavier and Monty.

Rapunzel pulled Eugene out of his thoughts, continuing to express concern over the bet. “I’m just worried.”

Eugene smiled at her, “I promise that when he loses, I’ll go easy on him. I’ll even let him proclaim defeat at the Snuggly Duckling instead of all Corona, how’s that?”

“I’m still worried this will make him feel bad, if he loses.” The princess continued, not comforted by Eugene’s compromise.

The captain thought further, and answered with a simple “you mean when he loses.”

“Eugene…”

“Look Raps, Varian can be a little sensitive, yes, not that I can blame him, but he’s not made of glass. He made the bet, this was his idea. When he loses of course I’m going to rub it in and tease him for it endlessly, but I think he can survive. He’s tougher than you give him credit for.”

“I know he’s tough!” She countered “I’m just trying to prevent any hits to his self esteem.”
The brunette sighed, and began again, “but you’re right, this was his idea. And I guess it has the potential to be a little fun.”

“He’s going to have tons of fun, Raps.”

Eugene stood up and pulled her into a hug. Sure, she was being a little overprotective, but he couldn’t find it in himself to be annoyed. She was looking after their friend. After everything that happened, she earned the right to be a little overprotective of them.

Eugene rubbed his hand up and down her back and pressed a kiss to her head.
“It’s just a lighthearted bet, I’m sure this won’t get out of hand at all.”

Ten minutes after Rapunzel left, Eugene heard shuffling in the ceiling above him.

He was an experienced thief, he had done that countless times before.

“How’s it going Varian?”

A muffled “seriously?” Sounded above him, followed by a panicked “oh crap”

Which was then followed by the young alchemist crashing into the floor next to Eugene’s desk.

Before the captain had time to react to the body covered in splintered wood and dust sprawled on his floor and ask if he was okay; Varian raised himself to his feet and took a ball out of his pocket, slamming it onto the floor next to him.

Smoke began to fill the room, hiding everything from Eugene’s sight. Including Varian and his stupid smug grin.

Including the medal.

Before Eugene had time to react to Varians surprisingly decent plan, despite the fact that there wasn’t a lot of trickery or cunning involved, just throwing a smoke bomb and leaving with the treasure, a scream ripped through the smoke.

Eugene panicked, and called for his friend “kid, are you okay? What happened?”

He stumbled around, feeling for the scrawny teenager. A panicked voice from the other side of the room called back to him “yeah I’m okay, it’s just that the uh, I may have um, I think this smoke bomb was expired”

That didn’t really comfort Eugene

“What makes you say that? Why did you scream?” His voice betrayed his panic, but he tried to calm himself. Freaking Varian out never ended well.

“When a smoke bomb expires the smoke it makes can damage your vision, and repeated exposure can temporarily blind you. And everything going black suddenly is kinda, I don’t know, scary?”

The smoke quickly dissipated, and Eugene rushed to his friends side. Varian was curled up in a ball, hands rubbing at his eyes which were squeezed shut. Eugene was panicking, and wrapped his arms around the kid. Forgetting completely about the attempt to steal from him and also the hole in the ceiling Varian had caused.

“Let’s get you to the infirmary.” He said, concern and panic lacing his voice.

“No no no it’s fine, the effect only lasts for about ten minutes, I’ll be fine I swear.” Varian gave Eugene a soft smile, which would have been comforting if his eyes weren’t squeezed shut. “Can I uh, stay in here until it wears off though? I don’t really wanna stumble my way down the stairs.” He asked while rubbing the back of his neck and turning away from Eugene, looking sheepish.

“Yeah kid, you can stay in here.”

Eugene helped the kid over to the couch and helped him get comfortable. Varian opened his eyes and they were cloudy and unfocused, and rimmed red.

“Are you absolutely sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah this has happened before” he shrugged.

Swallowing the lump in his throat after hearing such a worrying statement, Eugene went back to his desk to finish his paperwork. He would have to have (another) talk with Quirin, asking him to keep an eye out for Varians smoke-themed experiments. He trusted Varian when he said he would be fine though. After a while, Eugene began to trust him when he said that an experiment wasn’t dangerous, and he trusted the alchemist to come to him if he was hurt.

As he sat, his gaze landed over to the wall, where the medal was suspended. And the debris on the floor under it.

Varian almost got him. Sure, his attempt was rather uncreative and obvious, and Eugene was bound to have caught him, but he still would have likely gotten the medal and maybe would have even been able to hide it before Eugene could catch up to him.

But alas, the kid flew too close to the sun.

“The heist isn’t over Eugene. The second i’m better, I’m getting that medal.” Varian stated, now having curled onto his side facing the captain, his eyes still unfocused.

The captain chuckled “sure you are.”

“I am!”

Eugene thought for a moment, and decided that he needed a little more of an advantage. Varian almost got him and he was probably even more determined after his humiliating defeat.

“You know” he stated as he began to rise and walk over to the medal “you almost beat me, I have to commend that. You would make a decent thief. Uninspired and uncreative, yeah, and easily caught, completely unlike Flynn Rider or any legendary thief, but you did almost get the medal.”

Eugene took the medal off the wall, and smirked. “I think I’m going to lock this up.”

“What? That’s not fair!”

“On the contrary, it very much is. You see, most people keep their valuables locked in secret locations anyway. I’m only making this heist more realistic.”

“I hate you.”

“And the best part, you’re in here, but you have absolutely no idea where I’m hiding it. Good luck at midnight, Var.”

“Are you really taunting a blind man?”

Eugene answered by humming a happy tune as he locked the medal in a safe he had hidden in one of his cabinets, and then locked the drawer the safe was in; being sure to keep the noise as low as possible, he then slipped the keys into his pocket.

Varians eyes were in his general direction, but they were still cloudy and unfocused, and he was very much scowling. He had to admit, he was a little sad Varian couldn’t fully experience his smug demeanor.

Yeah, this heist was definitely leaning in his favor.

Except now he had a broken ceiling to clean up.

True to his word, Varians vision cleared up in about ten minutes. He swore vengeance, claimed up and down that he would win, and then left. Eugene had no idea watching Varian shake his fist and get mad would be so adorable.

It was two in the afternoon, five hours of doing monotonous paperwork, (he hated procrastinating and doing all his paperwork in one day but oh well) and two hours since his and Varians bet.

Eugene desperately needed to stretch his legs, and he needed to breathe in fresh air. Air that wasn’t covered in dust and leftover smoke from Varians' failed attempt at stealing.

He didn’t like the idea of leaving his room open to the pathetic thief, but it had only been half an hour since his attempt; he was likely still planning his next move. Eugene had time to walk around. Maybe even talk to his fiancée if she wasn’t busy.

As he entered the first floor, he caught a maid, and asked if she could clean up the mess in his office while he was gone. She told him it would be a few hours before she could. Eugene assured her he could wait.

After a walk around the training fields, a snack, and a riveting conversation with Rapunzel about bees, Eugene made his way back to his office.

His office, which was holding someone in a maids outfit, turned away from him. Odd.

The maid wasn’t cleaning up the mess though, this maid was poking around Eugene’s desk.

“Hey Varian.”

The figure raised up in a panic. And turned to Eugene.

“Whose Varian?” The figure chuckled nervously. Their black hair was pulled back into a ponytail with the hairstripe pinned back from view under their bonnet. There was also an absence of freckles, covered up with face powder. Eugene vaguely recognized the pinkish red dye on his lips as lip balm. Varian did, admittedly, look slightly different. Just not different enough (he didn’t even change his gloves). Disguised in what Eugene could only assume was a stolen maids outfit and Queen Arianna's cosmetics, Varian realized his cover was blown.

“Come on, I’m sure you’ve got other places to clean mysterious stranger.”

Varian scowled at him, and left the room with Eugene.

“So, did you find anything?”

“No” Varian grumbled.

“I have to say, this was definitely… a plan.”

“Shut up, it was a good idea.”

“Where did you even get that outfit?”

“Don’t ask.”

As they went down the hallway, Varian continued to glare ahead of him. To add insult to injury, he tripped over the skirt of the dress and fell onto his face as they turned left.

Eugene burst out laughing, Varians second failed attempt was even better than the first. And he felt compelled to gloat.

“You ready to call it quits miss?”

“Okay look it’s not my fault my distraction went off at the wrong time. If it worked as planned I would’ve had time to find the medal and take it.

“Uh huh sure, wait what distraction?”

Before Varian could answer, the plant next to him exploded.

Eugene looked at the burning plant unimpressed, while Varian just looked defeated.

“Clean this up and go apologize to Faith for stealing her clothes” he ordered, chuckling, as he walked back to his office.

Today was a good day.

It was now four in the afternoon, and Eugene had to prepare for his meeting with the King and Varian. It wasn’t anything too serious, just discussing weapon’s manufacturing or something similar, Eugene wasn’t really paying attention when Nigel told him about it.

Eugene, admittedly, was still willing to take precautions to prevent Varian from finding and stealing his medal. Sure his last two attempts were hilariously bad and had gone horribly wrong, but he wasn’t going to risk it. Maybe the third time would be the charm for him, he knew he wouldn’t give up.

The captain placed Stan and Pete on guard in his office, instructing that Varian should be drop kicked out the window if he tried to go in.
Okay maybe not drop kicked, but forcibly removed.

But, Varian was supposed to be at the meeting anyway. Eugene was confident Varian wasn’t going to be able to pull anything off.

As he walked into the planning room fashionably late, he cursed under his breath as he saw the King, the Queen, Nigel, Xavier, Ruddiger who was holding a notepad (he knew how to write?), some of his sergeants and lieutenants, but no Varian.

“Where’s the engineer?” Eugene asked.

“He couldn’t make it to today's meeting, he said something about trying to ruin your life? I did not ask further.” King Frederick told him. “He sent his raccoon in his place.”

Eugene cursed.

“May I be excused? Thank you!” He said, not giving anyone time to answer as he sped walked back to his office. His concern grew as he saw Stan and Pete out the window in the courtyard.

Eugene switched directions and left out the nearest door to chastise them for not doing their job.

“Stan! Pete! What the heck? You’re supposed to be guarding my office and keeping terrorizing little alchemists out!”

“We’re sorry!” Stan was very apologetic “it’s just that Maximus came to us and was trying to tell us someone was breaking into the castle!”

“Yeah and when Max comes to you, you don’t ignore him” Pete added.

Eugene paused, that was a legitimate cause for concern. “Did you catch them?”

“That’s the thing, we didn’t find anyone, or any evidence of a break in. Whoever did this was good.” Pete said, followed quickly by Stan “we were about to find you so you could alert the rest of the guards and their majesties.”

Eugene paused, and thought for a moment. Before glancing up to his window where he saw a silhouette of a young boy in goggles, he groaned.

“No one was trying to break in.”

Before the two guards could say anything, Eugene made his way back into the castle and into his office, where he once again saw Varian poking through the room. This time, Varian noticed Eugene before he could say anything snarky, and groaned with an “are you kidding me?”

“Nope!” He said, popping the ‘p’ “did you seriously get Max to lure the guards from my room?”

“He’s easily persuaded by apples.” Varian answered, shutting the drawer he had been rifling through.

Eugene sighed, he was right, clearly this kid was still determined and would do whatever it took to get the medal. It also wasn’t comforting that Varian had his nose in the cabinet holding his safe. Granted, he wasn’t in the right drawer, but he was getting too close.

“Say kid, I was thinking, today is a nice October day, Lance and the girls are visiting the castle, how’s about you, me, Lance, Rapunzel, and the girls all go for a walk on the town?”

Varian paused, and answered with a “I’m good, thanks.” And began to poke through another drawer.

“Nah I insist!” Eugene grabbed Varian by the shoulders and led him out of the office.

Varian pushed away from him “that sounds like a great idea, you take the love of your life, and Rapunzel and the girls, on a trip through town, maybe pick me up some truffles from Monty’s, but I stay here.”

Eugene grabbed his shoulders again and with his superior strength, led Varian out the door and locked it. “No, I think some outside time will do you good, get acquainted with the people you will have to admit defeat in front of.” Varian glared at him. “Besides, I just busted your plan, it’s not like you’ve got anything else to do.”

Varian sighed and accepted “maybe I can get some fresh inspiration while we’re out.”

“That’s the spirit!” Eugene clapped the visibly discouraged alchemist on the shoulder and led him to town.

“How’s your heist going V?” Kiera asked as they walked into the town square. Eugene and Varian had run into Rapunzel and quickly Lance and the girls, and they were all easily persuaded into a quick walk around. The mood around them was light, but Varian looked downcast as he walked with them.

“Horribly!” Eugene cheerfully answered before Varian could answer. Catalina and Kiera snickered and Rapunzel gave Varian a sympathetic look.

“My first three attempts didn’t go as planned, but I’m fully confident I’m going to win, it’s only a matter of time.” Varian answered, though he didn’t seem as confident as before, looking far more morose than he had earlier today.

Eugene snickered and then Lance spoke “I think you’re capable but I really don’t want you to embarrass yourself, maybe you should call it quits now.”

Varian squawked at him “absolutely not, it’s Eugene who's making a fool of himself.” Varian turned and glared at the captain. Lance and Rapunzel sighed fondly, Eugene and the girls struggled to hold back their laughter.

“Are you going to dress as a lady in waiting for your next plan?” Kiera asked teasingly “or are you going to crash through the window?”

Eugene wondered how the girls even knew of what happened, but gossip did travel fast through the castle.

“You guys are the worst, I’m going to go drown my sorrows in chocolate.” Varian mumbled as he walked into Monty's shop, but Rapunzel stopped him.

Eugene was about to comment but Rapunzel turned to him and handed him a bag of coins. “I think Eugene would be happy to get us all some candy.” She looked at him with her eyebrows raised, and wrapped her arm around the sad teenager, clearly no wasn’t the correct answer from him.

Eugene sighed and went into the shop, already knowing what his closest friends liked from there.

When Eugene returned, he noticed the alchemist's mood had lifted significantly, and he was chatting with Catalina about something he didn’t care enough to listen to.

Varian smiled and thanked Eugene as he handed the truffles over. The group settled onto a bench overlooking the town square, and Eugene sat happily in between his lovely fiancée and the bane of his existence. As revenge he stole some of Varians snack, and snickered as the teen glared at him but made no move to stop him.

He was happy. He was in Corona on a nice day, the early evening sun provided just enough warmth, but the October chill kept the temperature balanced. There were people traversing through the town but it wasn’t overly crowded. He had the most important people in his life with him, all chatting with each other.

Eugene was content.

Which was why he was very annoyed when a band started playing and a group of people began to dance, disrupting the peaceful atmosphere.

And why he was very annoyed when Rapunzel and Lance left him to go join the impromptu dance party.

Eugene stayed sitting with the children, watching but feeling no desire to participate.

“Not to say I’m surprised, but I wonder what brought this on.” Varian mused aloud.

“Eh, it’s Corona.” Kiera answered, Eugene fully agreed with her. Corona never needed a reason to celebrate, they just did on a whim.

“Give them a few minutes, I'm sure it’ll die down.” Eugene stated, before Varian interjected with an “or it’ll get worse.”

Eugene smiled at the kid, about to respond with his own sassy comment, before Rapunzel joined them once again, and grabbed Eugene’s arms and pulled him into the throng of people dancing.

“Tell my story!” Eugene jokingly yelled to Varian who was snickering.

Rapunzel twirled him around and smiled as Eugene returned the favor. Soon enough, the two were in a full jig as they jumped and bounced around the town square.

Eugene wasn’t much for dancing, but the joy on Rapunzel's face made it far, far more enjoyable.

Rapunzel placed one hand on his hip and placed the other hand in his, he mimicked her and they began a more foxtrot style dance.

Eugene’s attention was now fully on his fiancée and they moved around the town square, attracting a sizable crowd. Even Lance had ditched his own dance partner to watch from the sides with the children. Unlike the rest of the crowd though, this group was heckling them. Or more specifically, Eugene.

The song ended, and Rapunzel dipped him. Another song began, and she then took Varian as her dance partner. Varian gave a panicked look to Eugene, who only laughed, and then took Lance as his partner. Kiera and Catalina happily treating themselves to the others’ snacks while they were occupied.

This song once again ended, and the band moved on. Eugene could tell his Sunshine had fun, but was also relieved that she no longer had to deal with Varians steel toed boots accidentally slamming into her bare feet.

“Eugene and I are going to have to teach you how to dance, little man” Lance said as Rapunzel sat down, resting her sore feet. Eugene made a noise of agreement.

“Do I have a choice?” He asked questioningly, eyebrows raised, despite already knowing the answer.

“Nope.” Lance answered as he pulled the younger man into a side hug.

“It’s a good chance for some quality team awesome bonding time!” Eugene exclaimed as the group began their trek back to the castle for dinner. “Oh man, think of all we could teach him, the waltz, the tango, the foxtrot!”

“I would love to watch Varian do the tango with Eugene.” Kiera added.

Varian groaned, but continued to walk by Lance’s side as they traveled to the castle.

Unlike the rest of the day, dinner was uneventful. Varian had surprisingly joined them, despite him often choosing to eat in his lab or bedroom. The girls had also joined them for dinner, but Lance had gone to his guest room, stating he needed rest for an early shift at the Snuggly Duckling the next day.

The king had updated Varian and Eugene on what they had missed during their meeting, which really only included that Xavier was going to forge some better swords for the guard. Nothing fancy. Varians proposal of explosive bayonets was declined. As were his cyanide tipped crossbows.

Kiera was disturbingly disappointed by that.

The rather boring conversation consisting of “how was your days” was made interesting by Arianna asking Varian. Who then answered with an “uneventful.”

“Really, because one of the maids said they saw you dressed as them, sneaking into my room.” Despite the accusation, Arianna only looked amused and not offended.

Eugene couldn’t hold back his laughter. Neither could the girls. And neither could poor Rapunzel.

“What-“ Fred began, shooting an offended look at the teen before Varian raised his arms in defeat and yelled over the laughter “It seemed like a good idea at the time!”

“Varian made a bet with Eugene and has been trying to steal his Medal of Valour from him all day, and he’s not, well, doing that great.” Rapunzel said, giving Varian another sympathetic look, he only glared in return.

“Why?” Arianna asked, chuckling.

“Why did we make the bet or why is he failing? Because I can answer both.” Eugene chuckled, giving a teasing glance to the teenager who looked about twenty seconds from stabbing him with his butter knife.

“Why did you make the bet?”

Varian answered before Eugene could “because I think I would make a better thief than he was during his Flynn Rider days, and he doesn’t believe me.”

“And seeing as how every single attempt you’ve made to rob me has failed, I think I have the right to be confident I was correct.”

“That's what you think.” Varian countered, once again giving Eugene a smug look. Which would mean something if Varian had done anything right during today, but alas, he had been caught or failed each time.

It was beautiful in a way.

“How long do you have left in this game?” Frederick asked.

“I have until midnight, so I have plenty of time to claim my rightful victory.” Varian answered. And he was right, it was only about seven. But unfortunately, Eugene was headed straight to his office after dinner, and fully intended on locking himself in there until midnight.

Eugene could only smile to himself, today was going great.

By eleven, Eugene could not be happier. He had stayed in his room, with a drawer that was still very much locked. A maid had come in to clean the debris at some point in the evening, and after a thorough examination, Eugene determined that she was neither Varian nor his likely accomplice, Ruddiger.

Rapunzel had come in at some point around nine to hang out with him before bed, accepting that Eugene’s pride was going to prevent him from going to sleep at a decent time tonight. When asked, she stated that she saw Varian sulking in his lab, but had a lot of plans scattered around, and she thinks he’s going to strike again. When Eugene pressed her for details, she stated that she was a neutral party in this bet and wasn’t going to help one side win.
She seemed a little too quick to assure Eugene of this, but he trusted her, he knew he was probably being a little paranoid. Which was ridiculous, he was winning.

Especially considering an hour later Varian sent Ruddiger into his office, covered in fake blood- that after a two second evaluation, Eugene realized was just strawberry jam. Ruddiger also half ate the scribbled note of “help! -Varian”

It was even more hilarious when Varian sent Pascal, with the same exact trick except the note stated “help! -Rapunzel” twenty minutes later.

By eleven fifty, Eugene was already thinking about how he was going to celebrate his coronation as an amazing human/genius. Maybe he could try to write out a speech for Varian to give. He wasn’t going to humiliate the child, but he couldn’t resist the urge to annoy him as much as possible by rubbing his victory in his face.

Eugene gave another glance at the locked drawer, and another glance to the clock, and smiled in satisfaction.

This heist had definitely been in his favor.

His quiet gloating was interrupted when he heard a knock to his door. Eugene so desperately hoped it was Varian either admitting defeat and begging for the bet to be called off (just so Eugene could deny it) or Varian trying another half baked idea.

It was neither, when he opened the door he saw Arianna looking far more concerned than he had ever seen her.

“Is everything alright?” Eugene’s playful mood fell, concern lacing his voice as he met Arianna's worried gaze.

“Varian has just been arrested.”

Eugene’s heart dropped.

“What? Why?” His brain was going a mile a minute. Had he tried another attempt at robbing him but was caught by a guard who had no idea it was just a bet? Had he gone too far in one of his plans and hurt someone or damaged something? Was it completely unrelated to his heist? Was he okay? Did the guards hurt him? Oh no, what if they put him in the dungeons? What if his pardon was taken away? What if they put him in with Andrew again?”

Arianna must have been able to read his mind as she answered “he’s okay, no one was hurt. He was caught scaling the castle with acid so he could break into your office, but he got the wrong one and accidentally broke into one of the guards' bedrooms. He’s in the throne room right now.”

Eugene sighed. He was annoyed and frustrated with the kid, but relieved he wasn’t hurt nor did anything serious happen to him. And that he didn’t do anything serious to anyone else, just a little property damage.
All Eugene had to do was collect him, maybe barter with the king a little bit to go easy on him, and console Varian when he eventually broke down in tears.

Eugene sighed. It had been a fun day of watching Varian fail to live up to his prideful claim that he was a better thief than him. But now that it was eleven fifty five- five minutes until midnight, and Varian was currently under arrest in the throne room, and very likely to be sent into time out for the rest of the night by Freddie, and Eugene still had his medal; he couldn’t help but feel a little sad. He felt bad for the kid, he had definitely tried his best. It didn’t feel fair for the day to end in such a way.

But he also made his own choices. Even if they were hilariously bad.

As Eugene walked into the throne room, ready to be faced with a distraught and handcuffed Varian, an unhappy king sitting on his throne, and an upset Rapunzel mediating between the two, he was shocked to find that that wasn’t what he found at all.

Instead, he found the room filled with townsfolk from Corona. Odd, considering the late hour, but what was even odder was that Frederick was standing next to Rapunzel and Lance, all three looking as happy as ever and chatting with the people.

Eugene gave a questioning look to the queen, who only smirked and walked over to her husband and daughter.

Before Eugene could ask what the heck was going on and where was his Varian- he heard Catalina shout “he’s here!”

The townspeople looked over and filed away from the middle, giving him knowing glances the entire time, revealing the throne.

Sitting upon the throne was Varian, not at all distraught or handcuffed, looking incredibly smug, holding Eugene’s medal of valour,

“Looking for this, Eugene?”

The clock chimed, declaring it midnight.

Chapter Text

It was midnight, and Varian had the Medal of Valour. He had won the bet. He had beaten Eugene.

Despite every attempt to steal the medal failing, he had it.

“How? Wha- what?” The Captain stuttered out. He stuck his hands in his pockets, unable to find anything. They were empty.

How did the kid pull this off?

Varian hopped off from the throne, and Eugene heard a slight grumble from the King closely resembling a ‘finally.’

“I bet you’re wondering how I pulled this off.”

Eugene scowled and crossed his arms. “Literally every attempt at stealing my medal has failed; yes, I’m wondering how you pulled this off.”

“See, Eugene, that’s what you think. Unbeknownst to you, every single one of my attempts has only brought me closer to my goal.”

“Varian, you literally crashed through my roof and went temporarily blind.”

Eugene pointedly ignored Quirins worried face and Nigel’s horrified expression. “You crashed through the roof?” They exclaimed, only to be ignored.

Varian smirked up at him. “Did I really go blind though?”

Eugene tensed.

“You faked being blind?”

“Exactly.”

“Why? That’s so convoluted. Why didn’t you just steal from me when you used the smoke bomb? You would have been able to take the medal and run.” But instead, for some reason, Varian had decided to play the hard game.

Varian started to walk, circling Eugene, as he began to explain.

“You would’ve known immediately. A good thief doesn’t make it immediately obvious he’s stolen something right? Because then he gets caught sooner. You could’ve just caught me and taken the medal back before I was off the second floor.”
Varian continued his pacing and folded his arms behind his back, looking like an adorable supervillain.

“And, I mean, I needed a challenge. Taking it like that would’ve been too easy. And too boring. This needed to be a legendary heist, to rival Flynn Rider himself.”

Eugene cut off Varians little monologue. “That still doesn’t explain why you faked going blind.”

“I needed you to lower your defenses.” He said.

“Var, your stunt caused me to raise my defenses.” He deadpanned.

“Nah, I already knew you were going to lock the medal up at some point.” The kid shrugged.
Eugene again found himself asking “how?” He felt that he was going to be asking that a lot tonight.
“Because I knew you actually thought I had a chance at winning, and would do whatever it took to prevent me. And knowing you, you would gloat about it too. So I handed you the opportunity to show me where you were hiding the medal, and you never even knew.”

Eugene scowled. Where he thought that Varian had made a fool of himself, he had actually been making a fool of Eugene. The kid apparently knew him better than he thought he did. And if this attempt had been successful, so had the other attempts where the Captain had been so confident.
He felt an odd mixture of embarrassment at his apparent foolish confidence, and a touch of pride at how smart Varian was. But mostly frustration at how he had lost when he had been so sure of himself.

Varian, picking up on Eugene’s silence, continued.
“The next part of my plan came in the form of my flawless maid disguise.”
“I caught you as the maid, immediately.” He deadpanned, again.

Varian didn’t look offended or perturbed by that statement at all. He stopped walking right in front of Eugene.

“But you didn’t catch Kiera and Catalina.”
Eugene stilled, as Varian continued. “You see, while you were distracted by making fun of my seemingly foolish disguise, Kiera and Catalina were able to sneak in and pick the lock of the cabinet the safe was being held in. And my seemingly mistimed distraction of blowing up a plant, gave the girls a moment to sneak out of your office. You never even noticed.”

“I’m sorry, you blew up a plant?” Nigel exclaimed.
“Not now Nigel!” Varian and Eugene shouted in unison.

The man backed off, Eugene could deal with that later. Right now he was focused on the gloating alchemist.

“Okay so you picked the lock to the cabinet, but my safe lock can’t be picked, I designed it myself.” The Captain was grasping for any way to throw Varian off his game, to poke some sort of hole in the story, even though Varian holding the medal was proof that Eugene couldn’t.

“I’ll get to that, but first, phase two of my perfect heist. Patience, Eugene.” Just then, Ruddiger jumped onto the alchemist's shoulders. Of course, Eugene shouldn’t be surprised that Varian got the help of three of Corona’s best thieves. Two little girls and a raccoon.

“Like I said, I knew you knew I had a chance at winning, so I knew you’d post guards at your door while at the meeting. Luckily, Max and Ruddiger were all too keen to help me destroy you!” Varian said, shaking his adorable little fist again, grinning. “I had Max lure Stan and Pete out.”

“You didn’t even have to bribe Max with apples, did you.” Of course that horse would help Varian humiliate him. Looking over, the horse was giving Eugene the same smug look Varian was giving.

“Nope. And the time you spent distracted by Stan and Pete, Ruddiger was unlocking your window, giving me an opportunity to come in later, after I stole your keys.”

The man found himself asking “how did you even pull off stealing my keys?” Eugene loved the kid, and clearly underestimated him, but he didn’t exactly have the nimble fingers required for pickpocketing. Not with those gloves and clumsy nature.

“Oh I didn’t, Rapunzel did.”

Eugene let out a dramatic gasp, holding a hand to his heart, and sent a hurt look to his sheepish looking wife.

“Blondie, how could you? You said you were a neutral party!”

The brunette let out a soft laugh followed by a small “sorry.”

“It was easy to pull off, really. I knew by poking around near the medal would cause you to panic. That, mixed with your need to go outside due to being in your office all day, led me to believe you would drag me with you to the town square. Where I then easily convinced the locals to start an impromptu dance party. It was incredibly easy to convince them. A little too easy.”

Varian had used Corona’s celebratory nature against them. Eugene was so proud.

“Then, all I had to do was get Rapunzel to pull you into a dance, which then distracted you from her pickpocketing you. Then, she gave the keys to Lance.” Varian then gestured to the man who was standing next to Rapunzel, looking incredibly smug.

That must’ve been why Rapunzel insisted Eugene go into Monty’s alone. They were conspiring against him. Once again, Eugene was so offended. And so proud.

Wait. Why Lance? Why didn’t she just give the key to Varian?

Varian continued to monologue. “You’re probably wondering, wait, why Lance? Why didn’t she just give the key to Varian?”

“I was not wondering that.” Eugene scoffed.

“Well, I assumed you wouldn’t let me out of your sight anytime soon. So during dinner while you were gloating, Lance was going through your unlocked window, going into your unlocked cabinet, and unlocking the safe. Successfully stealing your Medal of Valour. And he gave it to me after I left dinner.”

Eugene wasn’t sure Varian’s face could even get more smug, as he posed with one hand on his hip, the other holding the medal.

“Then, I sent in some seemingly harmless attempts to steal from you so you wouldn’t get suspicious. And then I had Rapunzel tell you that I was still in the planning stages, despite the fact that I had already beaten you.” Varian made his way to sit once again on Fredericks throne, his raccoon purring smugly on his shoulders. Then he chimed in again, swinging his legs and clearly reveling in Eugene’s dumbstruck face.

“So, all I had left to do was send Arianna in, who wouldn’t seem suspicious to you at all, to bring you here. To my coronation.”

“Coronation?” The King asked, his concerned face filling Varian with joy.

“Eugene here is going to crown me as an Amazing Human/Genius. In front of all the Coronans who agreed to come to a party this late at night.”

Eugene watched as Rapunzel pulled out a beautifully painted handmade paper crown, handing it to Eugene. Unlike Lance and the girls who all looked smug, and Fred and Nigel who looked concerned, Rapunzel just genuinely looked like she was having fun. Bouncing on her feet and smiling.

Eugene was faced with conflicting emotions. He was humiliated in front of his family and country. He had been led all day to believe that Varian was incapable of stealing from him. He had been foolishly confident while Varian was beating him at every turn. The supposedly inferior thief had outsmarted him, he was three steps ahead of the Captain the entire time. He had planned the perfect heist. He had underestimated the kid and paid dearly for it.

And yet, Eugene was overwhelmingly proud of the kid. The kid who had outsmarted him and didn’t back down from the challenge. The kid who had convinced Eugene’s closest friends, his family, to join forces and steal from Corona’s greatest former thief. He had help, but he masterminded and orchestrated the entire heist.
Not only that, but him and Varian had clearly grown. With Varian now feeling comfortable enough with him to pull something like this off. Something he wouldn’t have done a few years ago.

He sighed, smiling up at the kid, who smiled brightly back.

Eugene took the crown in his hands and walked up to where Varian was now standing in front of the throne. With Varian’s head bowed, Eugene placed the crown right behind his goggles.

Eugene turned, facing the crowd of people who were milling about, either listening to Varian’s speech and the subsequent coronation, or eating the food that had been laid out and chatting, simply enjoying the impromptu party. Eugene wondered if Varian had been planning this party while also planning the heist.

Eugene wrapped his arm around Varian’s shoulder and cleared his throat to begin his announcement.

“Varian of Old Corona, the Royal Engineer,” Eugene’s face smile grew soft as his arm tightened around the kid “and my little brother, was able to outsmart me and best me at every turn. Varian is smarter than me, maybe not better than me but close, and the greatest genius in Corona. He is an amazing human/genius. And I am very proud of him.”

The crowd erupted into cheers. Mostly from Rapunzel, Lance, Arianna, Quirin, and the girls, but clearly there were a lot of citizens of Corona that were fond of Varian, and were happy to see him get recognition. Even if it was for something ultimately childish and pointless. Even Frederick was clapping.

Eugene looked down and smiled at the kid, who was beaming up at him. Eugene laughed and pulled the kid into a hug, who eagerly hugged back.

“Thanks Gene.”

Eugene really loved this kid.