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Chapter Text

Evan Buckley's life was perfect. To him at least- as perfect as it could be in his mind. He had his job- something that was his and that he loved and worked hard for. He had his friends- his fire fam and their families, his chosen family. He had his sister Maddie whom he felt closer than ever to. And he had his favorite people in the world- his family with Eddie and Christopher- his best friend and the love of his life and the man's son who was just as much Buck's son as he was Eddie's. Buck had all of this and it was more than enough for him. After so many years, after his childhood, he finally had such a happy life and he'd never trade it for anything in the world.

The day this bliss was threatened, it was a cold and stormy February morning.

The crew of the 118 had just finished a call where a kid had called about their dad falling down the roof and getting stuck on the lower level when he was trying to take down the Christmas lights barely hanging on by a strand of lights that wrapped around his leg. Very luckily for the man it hadn't been a big fall and he only had a sprained wrist and a broken ankle. Hen and Chimney had taken the man to the hospital and he and Bobby were wrapping things up at the scene. Eddie wasn't there, having taken the day off to take Abuela and Peppa to the airport so it would just be the two of them on the way back to the house. About to get in the truck, Buck was stopped by a voice, probably one of the neighbors, calling out to him.

"Evan?"

Buck froze. Chills raced up and down his spine, consuming him and rooting him into place. That voice... it couldn't be. Right?

"Evan Buckley, is that you?"

Movements slow as if he had been wading through quicksand, the man turned around and came face to face with a pair of hauntingly familiar grey eyes. "C-Craig?" The name felt heavy in his mouth weighing his tongue down as if it was stuck beneath an anvil. Bobby eyed him with cautious curiosity as the younger man looked to this new person.

Craig was a tall man, perhaps older than Bobby. His brown hair was greying and an array of crow's feet surrounded his grey eyes. A smile stretched over the man's lips as he clapped Buck on the shoulder. "It is you. How have you been buddy?"

Buck just barely managed to hide a flinch at the force of the hit to his shoulder. He could only continue to stare at Craig, a multitude of emotions running rampant through his stomach and his mind. He barely registered what Craig was saying, the words roaring in one ear and out the other in a dizzying whirlwind.

"I mean, it must have been ten-"

"What are you doing here?" Buck winced at the way he had just cut the man off and he felt the need to apologize. "I-I'm... I mean..."

Craig waved a hand at him, paying no mind to Buck's outburst. "We live here! Moved in about seven months ago."

"Oh..." was Buck's whispered reply.

"Yeah, Philadelphia was just getting to be too much during the winters and Charlotte has a bad hip so we figured, why not move somewhere warm? We thought about Florida, but Lotte didn't like the humidity so," he gestured around to the neighborhood behind him. "California it was!"

"Oh..." Buck whispered again.

At Buck's lack of talking, Craig stepped back a little, giving the younger man an appraising look. "So, a firefighter huh? Funny, I never pictured little Evvy as a first responder! I always thought you would go for that baseball scholarship. Go pro maybe. How on earth did you end up here? Last I heard you were heading somewhere overseas!"

Buck couldn't bring himself to respond to the questions being thrown at him in rapid fire.

"Oh! And Alyssa will be so happy to see you!"

Bobby frowned at the way Buck paled even more. The captain, who had been watching in heedful silence, chose to break through the myriad of questions that were being thrown at his friend. "Buck? We should be getting back to the house."

The steadying voice of his captain was enough to rip Buck from the hurricane of tumultuous thoughts that were no doubt assaulting his mind. Blue met brown as the younger man turned his head to the captain. He nodded his head in agreement before turning back to Craig. "I- uh I have to get going. Goodbye." Before Craig had a chance to reply, Buck had hopped in the truck and yanked the door shut.

Eyes narrowed the slightest bit, Bobby nodded at the civilian quietly before he too followed his teammate into the truck. Concernment colored his expression as his gaze continuously flitted over to Buck. It hadn't been until they were halfway back to the house that he chose to speak. "Who was that?"

"No one."

Bobby arched an eyebrow at him, lips pulling into a disbelieving line. "Buck?"

Buck shook his head as he angled his body away, hiding his expression from the older man. "Uh, someone- someone from a long time ago..." He chewed his lip as he glanced out the window, wondering what else he could say that wouldn't be an outright lie. "A friend of my parents." He internally winced. Okay. Not true. But the actual truth? Too much to utter.

Bobby frowned at the way the kid carried the tension in his shoulders, the way he slouched in on himself in a quasi-attempt to protect all his secrets. Knowing that would be all he got from the younger man, Bobby sighed, begrudgingly letting it go. "Alright, kid." Years of working with him had demonstrated the fact that Buck would not always voluntarily give any information and, if Bobby or anyone wanted to know anything, they had to wait for Buck to come to them when he wanted or needed to. As rare as that still was. Even after all this time, the kid still tended to believe that sharing any problem with his friends and family would burden them.

Reaching the firehouse within the next few minutes, Buck had been quick to exit the cab of the truck. He was buzzing with a nervous energy that only appeared in times of great uncertainty. Bobby considered inquiring if anything was wrong once more but the chance was yanked from him when his phone began to ring. Seeing it was Athena, he answered glancing back to where Buck had been standing only to see the younger man disappearing into the locker room.

"Hey, Thena."

She immediately picked up on his distracted tone. "Everything okay, honey?"

"Hmm... yeah. Well, I think." Bobby glanced at the entrance of the locker room once more before turning to walk to his office.

"You think?"

"Just, something... concerning happened on our call just now."

"Is everyone alright?" Shuffling could be heard on the other end of the line as if the woman was preparing to drop everything to rush the firehouse.

Bobby shook his head as he settled in his chair. "No one is harmed but Buck did run into someone he apparently knew and... the way he reacted was concerning."

Athena hmmed on the other end, all shuffling stopping. "Tell me more. Is Buckaroo okay?"

"Well," Bobby glanced outside of his office again, and, seeing no one approaching, he delved in. "He froze when one of the neighbors called out to him. Like he recognized the voice and when he turned around, his face was pale as if he had seen a ghost." He frowned as he recalled the wave of emotions that had washed over his kid's face. "And when the man went to clap him on the shoulder, the kid flinched. It was barely noticeable but it was there. It was as if he was expecting something bad to happen."

"What was his name?" There was an edge that colored Athena's voice. One that only appeared where her family was concerned.

Bobby knew where she was going with this. "Craig. Didn't catch a last name though. But I don't think we should pry. At least not until Buck gives a reason to."

Athena sighed and Bobby could imagine her pursing her lips in thought. "You're right," she relented. "It's just... the way you described his actions. There's something there."

Bobby nodded even though his wife couldn't see him. "I know, Thena. And I want to hope it's nothing. I want to hope that I am reading too much into this but I haven't seen him react like this since the Buckleys were in town."

It was silent for a few moments before Athena broke it. "Do you think we should invite him for dinner tonight? Just to check on him?"

Bobby smiled softly at that. "I think that's a great idea. I'll ask him as soon as we hang up." The fire captain frowned contemplatively as a thought flitted through his mind." I just hope he'll be up for it. He pretty much avoided my eye the whole ride home and he rushed to the locker rooms the second we parked the truck."

"Oh, Buckaroo."

Bobby could imagine his wife running a hand through her hair, eyes narrowed in a kind of concern that applied to her just her children. "I'll talk to him, dear."

"Okay, honey."

They spoke for a little longer, making plans for that night before Athena was being called back to work. "I have to go, but I'll see you tonight. Love you."

"I love you too, Athena."

Hanging up, Bobby leaned back in his chair looking at the ceiling while thoughts of his kid still ran around his mind. What was going on? Just who was this Craig person and why did Buck look as if he had seen a ghost? And why did he seem to panic when the man mentioned someone named Alyssa? The man moved to look down the stairs to the bay when he heard a truck pulling in. Ah. Chim and Hen were back. Slipping his phone into his pocket, he stood up and made his way to the entrance of his office. Ah, perfect timing. Buck was exiting the locker room at that moment. Now to just talk to his kid.

In the locker room, Buck sat staring straight ahead, unmoving. The tension still weighed on his shoulders, Atlas-heavy and suffocating. This couldn't be happening. Craig was here. Craig and Charlotte. They were here. In L.A. The people he had worked so hard to run away from, what? Over ten years ago now? And, if what Craig said was anything to go by, Alyssa was here as well. He had run away from life in Pennsylvania. He had purposefully cut himself off from everything there for reasons he still wasn't ready to broach and- oh God. They knew where he was now! They knew he lived and that he worked here. And sure, L.A. was big and the odds of running into these people again after today were very slim, but the city didn't feel that big anymore.

"And Alyssa will be so happy to see you!"

A burning began to encroach on the younger man's throat and he couldn't tell if it was traitorous tears or overwhelming bile. No... NO! He couldn't... he couldn't do this. God he felt fifteen again. He had to get out of here. He tore himself from his thoughts, abruptly standing up hard enough to make him dizzy. Barely giving himself a chance to steady, he made his way to his locker.

By the time Hen and Chimney had arrived back, Buck was hastily making his way out of the locker room.

Hen waved at him, sauntering over to his side. "Hey, Buckaroo! What are your plans for tonight?"

Buck shrugged, throwing on what he hoped was a relaxed smile. Judging by the older woman's critical eye, he was unfortunately not as successful as he would have liked. "Probably dinner and then bed. I'm just really tired tonight."

"No Eddie or Christopher tonight?"

Buck shook his head in negative and he couldn't help but feel a sense of reprieve that he and his inner demons would be spared from his friend's scrutinizing care. "No, but we'll see each other tomorrow. Chris wants to go to the aquarium." Buck threw a hand behind his head rubbing at his neck as he continued to smile at his two friends, forcing himself to calm down even more. For the second time that day, he felt as if he were exposed and on display and it made his skin crawl and sting with the intensity of an army of fire ants.

Luckily for Buck, they were cut off from any further conversation by Bobby's sudden appearance. "Well I hate to break it to you, kid but you'll have to forget dinner for one for tonight. Athena has personally requested your presence at dinner tonight."

Buck blinked at the other man in surprise at the sudden and soft command. "I- well..."

Bobby shook his head. "And no refusing. We haven't had you over in a while and May and Harry will be home this weekend and they'd love to see you."

Buck only stared at Bobby, not able to answer. He had hoped to be able to go home and hide from everything. To hide from Craig and Charlotte. God he just really wanted to hide.

Sensing the inner turmoil inside the younger's head, Bobby continued. "I have a lasagna prepped and ready to go as soon as we get home."

Buck smiled softly at the term 'home' that Bobby and Athena used so casually with him. And... besides Eddie's, there would be no safer place from Craig than with Athena. Maybe it would be nice to not be alone with his thoughts tonight. "Okay," the younger man nodded. "Lasagna sounds good."

Chapter Text

"Did you know that fish can breathe oxygen?"

"Really now?!"

"Yeah, they take it from the water and filter it through their gills!"

"That's so cool," Buck replied, leaning over.

"And it says here that some fish can walk while some can fly!" Chris added, bouncing in place in excitement.

"Fly? Really?" Eddie asked, leaning over to read the display Buck and Chris were looking at.

It was the next day after running into... well... it wasn't important right now. By the time he had left Bobby and Athena's, Buck had managed to push everything into the deep, deep abyss of his mind where all the unwanted thoughts lay. Belly full of Bobby's cooking and heart warm from the company he had been in, he had managed to fall into a restful sleep free from harrowing nightmares and grim memories. Right then, as promised, he found himself accompanying his two favorite people to the aquarium. There was nothing like being in the presence of the Diaz boys to dispel anything unpleasant from his mind. They had had this trip planned for a couple of weeks now- no matter how many times they visited the aquarium, it never got old. Buck smiled fondly every time Chris rattled off random facts to him and Eddie, Buck adding in a few himself here and there.

Eddie chuckled at the two as they excitedly flitted about from display to display. After the past several, grueling days of work, this is exactly what he needed- what they all needed- time with the family. Something in Eddie's heart warmed at the mention of family when it came to Buck. The younger man just fit so seamlessly into his and Christopher's lives and he had never felt happier than when Buck was with them. Hearing Buck's laugh, seeing him near and taking care of Chris as if he were his own just did it for Eddie every time.

"You know, according to Google there are approximately 34,000 species of fish in the world and that's only based on those that we know about," his best friend the love of his life stated as he knelt next to the young teen.

Eddie smiled at the man as he spouted off his own facts, regaling Chris, and apparently a few other kids, with everything he had learned. He watched the heartening scene for a few moments more before offering up his own question. "So how many species of these flying fish are there?"

"Well there are-" and Chris and Buck went on and on. The party of three spent the next few hours walking about the building and taking in all the new information they could before they decided to head out so they could grab lunch.

For Buck, it had been a great and peaceful morning and he couldn't be happier. Being with his two favorite people did that to him. Being around Eddie did that. Hanging out with the older man the man he loved, helping to raise his son, going with them to the zoo or the aquarium or having their weekly movie nights? All of it was more than enough to erase anything negative or worrying that had occurred the day before. One could even make an argument that yesterday had just been a passing nightmare. Nothing but a figment of the imagination and nothing worth dwelling on.

But of course, Buck was never that lucky.

Making their way to Eddie's truck, Buck stopped when he heard a voice calling out to him.

"Evvy!"

Buck froze. How was this even possible? There was no way he'd run into him twice in two days. What were even the possibilities of that? His breath caught in his throat and his hand slipped from where it had been ruffling Christopher's hair.

"Unbelievable! We just keep running into you, don't we? How are you, buddy?"

"Oh my, god this isn't happening," he whispered to himself. He stood rooted to the spot, much like yesterday, incapable of moving in any way. Vines of apprehension snaked their way through his veins and around his heart, making it hard to breathe.

Eddie, picking up on his friend's sudden absence next to him, turned questioning brown eyes to Buck. "Buck? You coming, man?" His eyes narrowed when he noticed the tenseness in Buck's shoulders. "Buck, what is it?"

Not acknowledging his questions as he turned to where the voice had come from, Buck winced when his eyes confirmed that his ears had regrettably not deceived him. Traitors. Standing there was Craig right next to Charlotte and some kid, maybe a few years younger than Chris, whom he had never met before.

"Oh, Evan!" Charlotte stepped forward, reaching out to cradle Buck's face between her hands, the movement causing Buck to step back. A barely-there frown pulled at the woman's lips before she stepped forward once more, this time succeeding in capturing his face. She caressed his cheeks for a moment before trying to hug him.

Eyes narrowing at the exchange, Eddie turned to assist his son in getting in the truck, telling him to hang tight before he turned back around to assess the situation. At seeing the woman still crowding Buck's personal space, Eddie stepped forward, planting himself the slightest bit in front of the younger man. It wasn't lost in him when some of the tension seeped out from Buck's shoulders at his appearance prompting Eddie to step just that much closer so their shoulders were brushing together. "I'm sorry but who are you?" he asked, cutting to the chase.

"Oh, forgive us." The woman smiled at him, seemingly oblivious to the discomfort she had bestowed upon Buck and the edge to Eddie's voice. "My name is Charlotte Stanton and this is my husband Craig. We knew Evvy when he was a kid."

Eddie hmmed at that, not moving from his position in front of his friend. "Eddie Diaz- I work with Buck." He held out his hand towards the woman.

She accepted his hand and shook it. "Oh nice to meet you, dear." She turned back to Buck. "Oh, it's so good to see you again, darling. Craig said you seemed good yesterday. Said you were a fireman?"

"I- yes."

Charlotte lit up at that, green eyes shining with startingly avid interest. "Exciting! What happened to baseball?"

"Actually we should get going. We have plans," Eddie cut in, seeing that the constant stream of questions was causing his friend to hunch further and further in on himself.

Buck nodded his head, thankful to Eddie for stepping in.

A pout settled on Charlotte's lips as she pushed back a strand of hair from her face. "Okay, but we must see each other soon. Oh, and Alyssa will be so happy to see you again!"

At the mention of that name, tension bled back into Buck's shoulders causing Eddie to look worriedly at his friend. "We really should be going. It was nice meeting you, though." Eddie grabbed a hold of Buck's hand, trying to tug him back towards the truck. The faintest downturn of Craig's lips was not lost on him but he chose to ignore it in favor of talking to Buck. "Come on, Buck." He moved his hand to the other man's shoulder. "Chris is waiting for us, we should get going."

Torn out of his inner turmoil at the mention of Chris, Buck nodded in agreement. Before turning around, however, his eyes landed on the boy still standing next to Craig.

"Oh, I'm sorry. This is Mark," Craig introduced when he noticed Buck's stare. "He's our newest foster."

A look of contemplation crossed Buck's face as he eyed the boy standing next to Craig. After a few minutes, he waved at the boy. "Hey, kiddo."

Mark smiled back, shyly. "Hello, sir. It's nice to meet you."

Buck smiled softly at him, anxiety abating somewhat. Clearing his throat, he turned to look at Charlotte and Craig. "Eddie's right, we should get going." He let himself be led back to the truck, letting Eddie open the door for him so he could slip inside. Once in the truck, that vine of anxiety lessened more and more the further away they drove.

"Hopefully we can see you soon, Evvy!"

Buck winced at that, choosing to ignore Charlotte's call. He really hoped that wasn't the case.

It wasn't until later when they had put Christopher to bed and they were sitting down, enjoying a couple of beers that Eddie broached the subject.

"So... those people from earlier. Who were they?"

Buck was silent for some time, thumb scratching back and forth against the beer label- a nervous habit, and Eddie thought he'd have to settle for no response when the younger man answered.

"Craig and Charlotte Stanton." Buck took another swallow of his beer before putting it down in favor of picking at his nails, another nervous habit. "I knew them growing up and they're... just not very nice people no matter how hard they try to seem."

Eddie gave a considering nod. "They certainly seemed... enthusiastic and without a sense of personal space." The last part he said with a frown, remembering just how uncomfortable Buck had been earlier. How he had tried backing away from Charlotte and how she had only persisted.

"They always were in front of others. They were all smiles and kind words and hugs but they were always forced and uncomfortable." Buck continued to pick at his nails, capturing a hangnail between his fingers and pulling.

Eddie said nothing to that, giving Buck plenty of opportunity to gather the thoughts that were no doubt torpedoing throughout his head. He did however reach out to the hand that Buck was using to pull at the hangnail and tap on it, reminding Buck to not pull so harshly.

The younger man gave him a sheepish look, letting his hands fall by his sides. "I spent a lot of time at their house though and I found out very quickly how fast that mask could slip."

Eddie tensed at hearing that, anxiety stretching over his heart at the thought of what that could imply. "Did they ever...?"

Buck leaned his head back so it rested on the edge of the couch. "Nothing physical."

Not entirely the truth Eddie could tell but he would let it go for now. "But still."

"Yeah. Still."

Eddie took a swig from his own beer, feeling the amber liquid drag itself down his throat as he swallowed around the dozens of other questions he wanted to ask. He didn't want to overwhelm his friend but in lieu of tonight's revelations, there was one thing he wanted to know. "And your parents did nothing?"

Buck snorted at that, shaking his head. "Nope. Nothing."

It hadn't been the first time that Eddie had wished harm upon on the Buckley parents. He had only met them once but once was enough to know he never wanted them around Buck ever again and finding out that they never did anything to protect their son from being hurt by these people, no matter the severity of their harm, only cemented those feelings. Eddie took another drink before settling his bottle down on the table. He turned his full attention to Buck, leaning forward with his elbows braced on his knees. "Who was Alyssa?" Eddie sat up straight at the reaction that garnered from Buck. He flinched. "Buck?" He reached out a hand, not setting it on the younger man's shoulder in case that wasn't what he wanted. "What is it? Who is she?"

"The- their daughter. She... she was always the nice one. But we had a fight and it didn't end well. That was a big reason why I cut them off completely when I left home." He looked at Eddie, blue eyes troubled and haunted. "I said some things I wasn't proud of and they were all so mad and they..." he looked away, grabbing his beer again so his hands had something to do as his thumbs began vigorously scratching at the beer label once more.

Slowly, giving the blonde a chance to pull away, Eddie rested his still hovering hand on his shoulder. There was only one question that mattered to him at this point. "Do you feel safe with them being around?"

"I-," Buck paused, not sure what to say to that. Did he? "Yes... I think. I don't know."

"Buck...?"

"I... I want to say it's fine but seeing them again just- it's just a lot to take in especially two days in a row and-"

"Two days in a row? You saw them yesterday too?" Eddie's hand began to rub up and down Buck's back as the near-constant tension that he had carried around today made its unwanted reappearance.

Buck felt himself lean into Eddie's touch, taking strength from the comfort. "During our last call yesterday. They live in the neighborhood where the call was. I only saw Craig though." Buck trailed off into silence, staring ahead at the forgotten game that was on the TV.

Squeezing the other man's shoulder, Eddie broke the silence. "You know, you don't have to tell me all the details now but I am here if you ever do want to."

Buck turned back to Eddie, a soft smile set on his lips. "I know. Thank you for not pushing, Eds. I- maybe one day I'll be ready to talk about it more but it just... right now it's a lot."

Eddie nodded in understanding before standing up. "Do you want to stay over tonight?"

"That'd be nice."

After bidding the younger man goodnight, Eddie slipped away to his room, leaving Buck to his thoughts. Here he was. Again. Thoughts and memories of the past assaulted his mind in tandem and left him a sleepless, tearful mess. The memories of today and yesterday melded together with those from years ago, creating a vivid picture of everything he had wanted to keep everyone in his current life from knowing. Phantom hands ghosted his sides as sultry words were whispered in his ears, leaving an acidic path of discomfort and shame in their wake. Shouts of fire and looks of contempt wove in and out of his mind, reminding him of the fallout. The same nausea from yesterday had returned full force and it was all he could do to keep from running to the bathroom and expelling every single thing he had eaten in the past 24 hours.

He still could not fathom how it was possible, in a city as big as L.A., never mind the entire country, to run into the same people twice in completely different parts of said city. People he had been ultimately successful in forgetting all these years, except for that one time his parents were visiting. It had taken him a while to re-forget everything after being reminded of the Buckleys' betrayal and involvement, or lack thereof in the memories of the Stantons. Sighing, he turned over, repositioning himself once more, furiously wiping a hand against his eyes. Shame continued to assault his heart and his mind as he tried to repress these reminders. It had been so many years. Why was he still letting it get to him? He whimpered quietly when a particularly harrowing thought danced across his mind. He wanted Eddie. He wanted the man to just hold him and tell him everything would be alright. That would involve him delving further into what happened. Maybe not tonight or even tomorrow but that is what it would ultimately come to. And Buck couldn't stomach that thought. He couldn't stomach the thought of anyone knowing. Not Eddie. Not Bobby or Ahtena or... Maddie. No. Buck would just have to hold it in. He did back then and he was fine. He could do it now. How likely would it be that he saw the Stantons again?

That damn Buckley luck.

Buck wished he could say that was the only other time he saw the Stantons but that would be a lie. They were everywhere all of a sudden. Near the firehouse. At the store. He had been close to calling Athena for a restraining order but... the family hadn't done anything to him. There were no threats, verbal, physical or otherwise. Still though. Where would they show up next? Would the next time be as pleasant- pleasant being a very loose term, as the last? Would Alyssa finally show up like they kept promising? Would he be forced to finally tell his friends and family what was going on? Would he be forced to tell them what had transpired all those years ago? God. He couldn't do that. He just couldn't. No one could know. Especially not Maddie. She- he didn't know what he would do if she found out.

Despite all the turmoil happening in his personal life, Buck thought he'd been fairly inconspicuous with his worries. It didn't help that both Eddie and Bobby had been keeping an eye on him more so than normal. It wasn't like his job had been affected in any way but rather it was how he acted when he was at home or out and about, even when he was in between calls at the firehouse. One day a couple of weeks after first running into Craig, Bobby called Buck into his office.

"You wanted to see me, Bobby?" Buck closed the door behind him, nerves a jittery mess as he pulled at his fingernails in a disquieted unease.

Bobby stood up from where he had been sitting behind his desk, opting to just jump right in. "Buck... what's been going on, son?"

The younger firefighter tilted his head in confusion. "I'm sorry?"

Bobby sighed, perching himself on the other side of his desk, not breaking eye contact with his kid. Because this was his kid Buck that he was talking to and not his subordinate Buckley. "You've been jumpy for the past two weeks. Cautious and looking over your shoulder. It honestly has been apparent since we ran into your friend Craig."

Dread burrowed its way from Buck's stomach to his throat. What had he done wrong? How did he mess up? And what could he do to fix it? "But I've been fine. My job hasn't suffered or-"

"Hey, kid," Bobby cut in gently. "This has nothing to do with the job. Your performance has not been affected but that's not my concern right now. You are."

Buck crossed his arms in front of his chest. "I-I'm fine. I promise."

"Does this have to do with Craig?" Bobby pressed. "Has he sought you out again? I saw you that day. You couldn't get away fast enough. Did... did something happen? You said you knew him when you were younger. Did he do something?"

"I'm fine, Bobby. I promise. It's all in the past."

"Okay, Buck-"

Buck shook his head, standing up straighter. "I'm fine, Bobby. Are- are we good here? I should get going. Chris has a project for school he needs help on."

Bobby deflated at the younger man's dismissal. "Just... I'm here if you need me. Athena and I both are. Please remember that."

"I-I will. I'm fine though. I am." With that, Buck all but ran out of Bobby's office, eager to get away from the man and his concerns. He was fine. Really.

Except that he wasn't.

Later that night, as he stared at the ceiling of his bedroom, he couldn't get Bobby's words out of his head. On his drive home, Buck had constantly been looking over his shoulder and into the window of every car that drove next to him in search of red hair and green eyes. He was beyond paranoid wasn't he? Maybe he should tell someone. At least Athena... maybe. It couldn't hurt right? He couldn't keep lying to himself and say that he didn't dread each time he went out, thinking he may run into the Stantons once more. There was no 'maybe' about it was there? He felt like he was on constant display and he didn't even know who was watching. The level of stress and anxiety and even fear that he had not felt since that time in his life was soaking into him like a sponge every time he left his loft and he didn't know how much longer he could really hide his true fears or feelings on the situation from his friends and family. Starting the jeep, Buck made up his mind. He wasn't ready to tell anyone, not even close but if he were to talk to anyone, Athena would be it. Next time she and he both had time off together, he would tell her about his concerns. He just hoped the Stanton sightings would die down until that time because he didn't think his already frayed nerves could handle another run-in.

He never thought he'd see them where he lived.

Buck had just returned from a long and grueling 48-hour shift and was in the process of getting ready for bed when knocking rang throughout his loft.

Opening the door, he didn't have a chance to take in what was going on before a red-headed blur was flying at him.

"Evvy!"

If he had frozen on the spot with Craig and Charlotte, it was a whole other thing with Alyssa. He was having an out-of-body experience with her. Logically, he should have known with his recent luck that this would probably happen.

"A-Allyssa?"

The woman pulled back from him. "Oh my, God, it's been forever! Look at you! My how you've grown!"

Alyssa had grown as well. She was only a couple of inches shorter than Buck himself and she had muscled curves that disappeared and reappeared throughout the lines of her dress. Her red hair cascaded down past her shoulders and her icy green eyes were alight with a mirth he hadn't seen in years. Despite all the ways she had grown, however, he still saw the same outgoing and assertive girl from when he was a kid.

"Wh-what are you doing here? How did you even know where I live?"

"Oh well, Mom and Dad kept running into you and they were never able to ask you or see you for more than a couple of minutes at a time so I took the liberty of tracking you down." She bopped him on the nose like you would a cat as if her explanation was more than enough to placate him.

All the air felt as if it had been sucked out from his lungs by a vacuum at those words. "Y-you stalked me?" How much of his life did she know about? Did she know who his friends were? His family?

"I wouldn't call it stalking. I mean I did have a friend from PPD back home help me out." She waved a perfectly manicured hand in dismissal. "All legal!"

Buck took two large steps back, trying to put some distance between himself and the woman. "That... that's not legal, Alyssa. I- you need to leave."

"Oh, Evvy, I-"

"Please do not call me that." Buck searched around for his phone, spotting it on the island. He snatched it up, holding it close to his chest just in case he needed it.

"You used to love it," Alyssa countered, leaning against the wall by the door.

"I didn't know any better back then."

"Don't be rude, Evan. We're family."

"We were never family."

"But we were, Evvy. Our family was complete with you in it." She sauntered over to him, ignoring the way he backed away from her. Reaching out a hand to trace over his birthmark, she continued. "You always were the one that got away."

He was dangerously close to expelling everything he had eaten. "Alyssa, we were never- I just. Please just go." His blue eyes trailed over her shoulder and next to the still open door where his keys were hanging. If she didn't leave soon, he would.

"Just watching you lately, watching the man you've become?"

She had been watching him. She had been watching him. The ugly thought repeated itself like some kind of bilious mantra. He wanted to be sick.

"A firefighter! A hero to the city! The man I always knew you could be. You saved all those people during that tsunami."

"Alyssa..."

"And that little boy you saved, your friend's kid, is sooo cute. He reminds me of you!"

A sudden wave of anger pulsated through his body, clogging his lungs and throat as he spit his next words out. "Stay away from him. Do not go anywhere near him or his dad."

"Why would I? You know that you and I-" she took a step back as he stood to his full height.

"Alyssa, you need to leave."

"But, Evvy."

"Go."

Alyssa pouted. "Oh, Evvy, come on."

"She's right, buddy."

Buck flinched at the sound of Craig's voice. No.

"We're a family, Evan and you need to remember that."

Buck's eyes found the man standing in the doorway, hands held up in a placating manner. The younger man took several steps back from where he had been standing in front of Alyssa, now standing behind the semi-safety of his kitchen island. For every step he took back, Alyssa took one forward until she was almost on top of him again. The walls were closing in and he could barely breathe. She was here- his abu- she was here and her family was here too and it was all too much and he couldn't breathe and this was a nightmare and- he felt a hand caress his birthmark and he screamed. He couldn't do this. He couldn't do this again.

He barely registered pushing Alyssa and then Craig away. Barely registered grabbing his keys. Barely registered running out of his loft and down to his jeep. He... he wanted Athena. He wanted Bobby. He wanted Bobby and Athena. Now. He had no recollection of the drive over to the Grant-Nash household. So desperate was he to get to the couple, that he didn't even hesitate in knocking on the front door.

'Got to get to Bobby and Athena. Need to get to Bobby and Athena. Need to be safe- to feel safe.'

The door was pulled back, revealing a confused Athena. "Buckaroo? What are you doing here?"

"C-can... can I c-come in?"

The older woman was on immediate alert, glancing around for anyone or anything that could be a threat to her or the young man in front of her. Seeing nothing immediate, her eyes landed on the man in front of her once more. Her heart clenched at the sight. His normally bright blue eyes were dulled and red-rimmed, his face was pale and he was shaking so badly. Everything about the scene screamed at her to reach out and wrap the kid in her arms. To hold him and never let go. "Oh, baby, what happened? Come on, come here." She wrapped a comforting arm around his waist and pulled him inside. Once the door was fully shut, Athena felt Buck relax against her but that only lasted a minute before his body started shaking again.

"Athena..." he whispered as he wrapped his own arms around her. "I- I didn't- I didn't know what to do and- Athena they're back and I- I can't."

"Shhh, baby." Athena tightened her hold on him, bringing up a hand to slowly card through his blonde curls. "It's okay, Buckaroo. You're safe now. You're safe here. I've got you."

"Buck?" Bobby stood in the entryway to the kitchen, surprise and concern mixing in his eyes. "Athena, what happened?"

His wife glanced his way and by the look she was giving him, she had no idea either. She just knew that the younger man had needed comfort and had apparently sought her out for it. Bobby continued to stare at them, not sure what to do. Any doubts on what to do disappeared however when Buck raised his head from Athena's shoulder and their gazes connected.

"B-Bobby..."

The older firefighter was across the room in seconds and bringing his wife and kid into a bone crushing hug. "We're here, kid. We're right here. Whatever it is, it will be alright."

Roughly an hour later, Buck found himself surrounded by the couple on either side of him as they all sat on the couch.

"I've never told anyone about this... especially not Maddie."

Athena and Bobby glanced at each other before turning their focus back to the younger man.

"Craig and Charlotte? They're my foster parents. Alyssa is their daughter. She's Maddie's age."

"Foster...? But I thought..." Bobby trailed off when he saw the way Buck's nails were digging into his palms. He took note of the way that the younger man was also trying to calm his breathing. Bobby reached out a hand to Buck, gently pulling open his hands so the nails were no longer abusing his flesh. He smiled softly when he felt the younger man squeeze his hand back.

"It's... the Buckleys? They left. One day they were gone and I was just put into the system."

Athena frowned at that, ice seeping into her stomach. "Gone? What do you mean, baby?"

Tears stung the younger man's eyes once more. "It started when I returned from a weekend at a friend's house..."