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Chapter Text

There was a certain entracing electric pulse that radiated through Sirius Black’s fingertips, traveling up Remus’ nervous system and leaving his whole body feeling tingly and warm. The voltage warmed Remus up from the inside out; forcing him to smile in a perpetually dopey state at the feeling of euphoria that came from simply holding hands with the raven-haired man. From the very first touch, he was hooked on the feeling and craved it like a bird craves the open blue sky to fly.

If his touch was electric, then his personality was the strongest magnet Remus had ever seen, and he was a doctor in a hospital with MRI machines with some of the strongest magnets known to man, but none of those were a match for Sirius’ personality. His laugh, his tattoos, his black nail polish, the way that he insists on braiding little tiny braids in Remus’ hair and playing with his hair, the spontaneity, the adventure, the stories, and the way that he hung on every word Remus said and listened as intently as one would listen to a prophet and then recalled every tiny detail later on all made Remus melt as a collective.

After ten minutes with the man, Remus was already so far gone that Sirius could have revealed that he moonlighted as an ax murderer and he would have just gone along with it. Remus has never been a lovesick fool, actually he was known for quite the opposite and always tended to keep a level head, but he found himself wanting to reach out and twirl the soft black cascading curls that framed Sirius’ face as the two sat across from each other, sipping milkshakes after just having seen a movie together on their third date. Or rather, Sirius saw a movie, curled up against Remus with his head on Remus’ shoulder while Remus’ brain showed an error message for the same time. He couldn't even tell you what the movie was about, but he could recall the warmth against his side and the tingly feeling in his stomach when Sirius played with Remus’ fingers. 

It was late, after midnight, and the two were sitting at picnic tables in the park with the milkshakes, a suggestion by Sirius himself.

“This line right here is your head line and that means that good head is in your future.” Sirius beams, his index finger tracing a line across Remus’ palm while Remus tries to resist the urge to let out a full-body shiver at the contact from just one finger tip. He had offered to read Remus’ palm and even the small contact from it was killing Remus.

“Smooth.” Remus bites his lip, trying profusely to keep a blush from painting his cheeks.

“What can I say, I'm a simple guy.” Sirius smirks, clearly pleased with himself at the reaction he was pulling from Remus, “A simple guy who lives just a ten-minute walk from here.”

Remus couldn't even pretend like this wasn't the most enticing offer he had heard in a while.

“Let's see if we can make it in eight.” The sandy-haired-man challenges, attempting to take back some semblance of control by grabbing the hand that had been cradling his own and lacing their fingers together.

Sirius keeps the house-tour brief and the lights off as they stumble into his apartment together, but the bedroom in his tiny apartment feels impossibly far for the pair as they soon discover that it is hard to make out and walk at the same time.

Sirius pushes Remus down on the bed and straddles him immediately. “You're. So. Beautiful.” Sirius breathes out in a rush, punctuating each word with a kiss down Remus’ neck.

“Can I take this off?” Sirius breathes, a wisp of hot breath in his ear making Remus shiver.

“You better.” Remus growls, tangling his fingers in Sirius’ hair, “Start making good on your palm reading or I'll think that your psychiatry degree is from Google.”

“I didn't suffer through squishing eight years of school in 6 years to have my degree come into question.” Sirius gasps, “Let me show you right now just how good my predictions are.”

Sirius pulls Remus’ shirt over his head in one impressively fluid move as he moves to start kissing his way down Remus’ stomach, “You're so fucking beaut-”

Remus was in the middle of blushing at the complement when a slam of the front door and the sound of footsteps running down the hall causes Sirius to spring up from the bed with no warning and rush to the bedroom door.

A man with brown curly hair and glasses gives a sympathetic smile and a wince at the situation as he holds a struggling blur of a child back, trying to keep him from bursting into the room.

“I'm sorry Pads, he woke up freaking out and wanted you.” the man winces again in sympathy and gives Remus a small and awkward wave.

“Let me go, let me go!” The small boy screams, flashes of ink-black curls obscuring his face as he thrashes in the arms of the man who had brought him. Remus could see that he was clearly wearing pajama pants and a t-shirt so large that he was swimming in it. Sobs wracked his tiny body as he struggled and screamed at the top of his lungs.

“It's okay James, give him to me.” Sirius is across the room in an instant, bending down with his arms open and beckoning the child forward. The man, James, lets the boy go and he sprints like horse fresh out of the gate in a race for the few feet into Sirius’ arms, instantly getting picked up and wrapping his legs and arms like a vice around Sirius’ back as he buries his head in his shoulder and continues to sob loudly.

“It's okay little star, you're okay. I have you.” Sirius coos, voice impossible soft as he moves to rub circles on the little boy’s back with his hand, instinctively rocking slightly back and forth.

“You can go James, it's okay. I got him, you can go home.” Sirius speaks in a quiet and meek tone, so different from the loud, confident, and adventurous man that Remus had gotten used to.

“Alright Pads, sorry.” James trails off, closing the door behind him. Sirius waits until he hears the door close and lock before letting out a deep sigh, his posture rigid and stressed out, a total contrast to the carefree and wild Sirius that Remus had known before.

Without looking at Remus at all, Sirius sits down on the bed, back facing Remus, and gently rocks the boy in his arms. Remus notices that Sirius is muttering soft words to the boy in a language that he can only assume is French as the little boy sobs and screams back in French.

“You're okay, baby. You're safe. You're at home. I have you.” Are the only phrases Remus can make out as Sirius switches back and forth between speaking English and French.

“I don't like sleeping at James and Lily’s. I missed you. I was scared.” the boy wails, clutching onto Sirius’ shirt so tightly that Remus feared he would rip it. Sirius and the boy seemed to be locked in a world  of their own, neither one seeming to notice the fact that Remus was partially hiding under the covers, shirtless and embarrassed.

So Sirius had a kid. Definitely a detail that he neglected to mention. It made sense, on both dates prior to this one he was always home before bedtime.

“Can I stay with you?” the boy pleads.

“Always, always my sweet boy. You can always stay with me. I will always be there for you. Never leaving you.” Sirius presses a kiss into the boy’s curls as he continues stroking the boy’s hair with one hand. 

After a few minutes of Sirius muttering and cooing in French as he cuddles the boy close, his crying finally pitters down and subsides to a hiccupy shudder that leaves his tiny body shaking like a leaf.

Remus isn't prepared for when the little boy picks his face up from Sirius’ shoulder and icey-gray tear-filled eyes meet his, instantly scowling with distrust as a frown graces his porcelain face, almost identical to Sirius except for the fact that the little boy’s face was dotted with freckles in the same way that the sky is dotted with stars.

“Why don't you have a shirt on?” the little boy scowls. Remus can see Sirius facepalm for a second and let out a deep sigh before he turns around in bed, sitting cross-legged and depositing the boy in his lap and wrapping his arms around him. Remus notices that Sirus refuses to meet Remus’ gaze, instead looking timidly at the little child in his lap.

“Regs, this is Remus.” Sirius says gently, running his fingers through the boy’s curls in a way that instantly wipes the frown off his face as the boy melts in Sirius’ arm, likened to a cat that was purring under affection.

“Hi buddy, I'm your dad’s friend.” Remus sticks out his arm to shake the boy’s hand, but the little child looks immediately disgusted and astonished as he frowns.

“Siri’s not my dad, he's my brother.” the boy frowns, seeming like he was calling Remus’ intelligence into question in the same way that one would after seeing someone call the color of the sky red.

“Remus, this is my little brother Regulus. I adopted him when he was three.” Sirius clarifies, still avoiding Remus’ gaze.

“How old are you now bud?” Remus asks, retracting his hand.

“Six.” Regulus answers, as if he was stating the obvious. Remus literally had a medical degree, but there was something about this posh little first-grader that made Remus feel like he was being judged.

“Were you guys having a sleepover?” Regulus asks, looking up directly at Sirius to ask.

“Yes, we were.” Sirius nods, spidering fingers up and down the sides of Regulus’ arms in a comforting way that causes him to settle even further into Sirius’ lap.

“Do you need a shirt? You can take one of Sirius’. I'm wearing his Queen shirt right now so it feels like he's hugging me when he's gone and because it smells like him. You need a shirt to sleep. You both need pajamas.” Regulus stresses the importance, looking right at Remus with urgent eyes.

Remus bends down and picks his t-shirt up from where it rests on the floor, slipping it over his head with a strange sense of embarrassment before he catches himself looking at the six-year-old for signs of approval.

“Alright buddy, time to lay down. Bed time for you.” Sirius cheers, depositing the boy on the bed before standing up.

“You're wearing jeans, Siri.” Regulus points out, unimpressed at best.

“Alright, alright, I'm changing you bossy freeloader.” Sirius grumbles, cheeks still tinged red with embarrassment and shame. Regulus just giggles at the insult and Remus can't help it as his heart melts at the bell-sounding laughter.

“You're in outside clothes.” Regulus points at Remus, “You need pajamas to sleep. First pajamas then bedtime.” Regulus repeats the steps of the routine for his bedtime with ease.

“You don't have to stay-”

“I'd love to stay.” Remus beams, “I hear it on good authority that you have pajamas that I can borrow.”

“Of course.” Sirius nods, pulling two pairs of pajama pants out of the drawer before pulling two-shirts out and handing one of each to Remus.

“You can change in the bathroom.” Sirius says meekly as he hands off the clothes, looking at the pajamas and not Remus, he points to a door that Remus can only assume is an adjoining bathroom. Remus’ heart hurts at the absence of a joke about Remus wearing his clothes from Sirius. The witty and charming man that Remus had gotten to know had vanished and was replaced by someone whose sparkle had dulled.

“Look at me.” Remus commands softly, tilting Sirius’ chin up with one finger. “This isn't how I imagined our first sleepover going, but I am thrilled nonetheless. Come change with me and let's talk.”

Sirius sighs in resignation before speaking to Regulus in French quickly and following Remus into the bathroom. Now that the lights are on, Remus can see clearly how there is one adult toothbrush and one child’s toothbrush. The toothpaste has a teddy bear on it and the bathtub has bath toys that are drying sitting in it. With the lights on, Remus can see so much more from Sirius’ apartment, but so much less than Sirius himself.

“I'm so sorry. I haven't dated since he came to live with us and usually most people are scared off by me having a kid, especially one who has a severe anxiety disorder and PTSD. My parents beat the shit out of me as a kid, and when I ran away at 18, they had another one immediately to do the same thing with. But I fought for custody of him and now I'm a 24 year old who goes to parent-teacher conferences. He has really severe anxiety, especially when he's separated from me, and I thought he would be fine across the hall with my best friend and his girlfriend, but he gets bad nightmares and I'm his safe person. I didn't mean to lie, but I had such a good time with you and I didn't want to ruin it by telling you about Reg, and I-” Sirius’ gray eyes swim with tears in a way that echoes the eyes that Remus just saw in Regulus.

“Shhhhhh.” Remus cuts off his rant by placing his index finger on Sirius’ lips, “Before tonight I thought that there was nothing you could do to make me like you more, but I was wrong. Seeing you with him made me melt. I thought you were the coolest person ever, but your mini-me is even cooler. I would love to stay, if you would have me, and I would love another date with you. Maybe this time we can bring him with us and hang out. If you're in, I'm in.” Remus promises.

Sirius doesn't answer with words, but instead flings his arms around Remus and squeezes him tight. As the two emerge in pajamas and settle into bed with Regulus in between them, Remus thinks that there is nowhere that he'd rather be than here right now.

Chapter Text

Remus woke up to soft whimpering sounds coming from somewhere close to him in an unfamiliar and soft bed. For a second, he almost forgot where he was until his eyesight blearily adjusted to the warm weight that he was leaning against. Remus rubs his eyes and takes in his surroundings. Sirius was laying next to him with Regulus curled up on his chest. One hand was gently rubbing the curly-haired boy’s back while Sirius’ other hand remained curled around Remus’ arm.

“Morning, little star.” A soft voice mumbles, effective shushing the whines. “You're awake, open those eyes for me.” Sirius seemed half-asleep himself, comforting the child like it was second nature. Remus surmises that this routine is pretty practiced between the pair.

“Bad dream.” Regulus sniffs, nuzzling into Sirius’ shoulder. Sirius closes his eyes for a second and plants a kiss on top of his brother’s black curls.

“No more bad dreams, Reggie. I woke you up before it got too bad, you're okay.” Sirius promises, stroking the child’s hair comfortingly.

“Hey, good morning.” Remus smiles at the pair. Remus gets a good look at Regulus for the first time. He's small, exceptionally so. So small that when Sirius wraps his arms around him he pretty much vanishes. He’s also got freckles dotting his face and arms, but his skin is the same milky and flawless skin that Sirius has. Both Black brothers have the same shade of jet black curls, but Regulus’ curls go down to the nape of his neck while Sirius’ brush his shoulders. Regulus’ eyes are much closer to gray than Sirius’, but both of them had the most mesmerizing eyes Remus had ever seen. Regulus’ voice was also a baby voice still, so squeaky and tiny. Remus watched in admiration as the little boy clutched onto his brother like he was his whole world.

“Good morning, Remus.” Sirius smiles, tapping a gentle finger twice on the tip of Regulus’ nose before the boy lets out a begrudging and muffled, “Good morning.”

“What time is it?” Sirius mumbles, looking at Remus for an answer, as he knows Remus keeps a watch on his wrist.

“9:06.” Remus answers.

Regulus sits up, sniffling with leftover tears clinging to his eyelashes. “Meds.”

“Go watch TV, baby breath. We’ll do that later.” Sirius says as his eyes flash with embarrassment.

“It's 9:06. Meds are supposed to be at 9. We have to take them.” Regulus insists, tears pooling in his gray eyes again, making them seem even brighter.

“Alright, alright, bossy.” Sirius teases, but his voice shows concern as he scoots Regulus off his lap and places him in the space between Remus and himself before he leans over to the nightstand to a clear organizer with a few orange pill bottles and unopened water-bottles neatly lined-up.

Sirius fumbles around for a few seconds before handing Regulus a tiny orange pill and a tiny blue pill in his palm before handing him a water bottle.

Regulus obediently and routinely pops both pills in his mouth and swallows water before recapping the bottle neatly and handing it to his brother.

“Where's yours?” Regulus asks, voice small and confused as he looks up at Sirius with all the trust and innocence in the world that makes Remus’ heart absolutely wrench.

“I'll take mine later.” Sirius mumbles, cheeks growing the same red glow of mortification from last night as his eyes drop again.

“You need to take them. It has to be at the same time everyday or you could get sick. I don't want you to get sick.” Regulus pleads, looking stressed out as he puts his tiny hands on Sirius’ cheeks to make him look at him.

“Don't worry, I'm not gonna get sick.” Sirius melts and focuses all of his attention on the child. He leans over and shakes out a white pill of his own before swallowing it dry.

“No water?” Regulus frowns in confusion.

“Don't need it. Now, go wake Pete up and tell him to watch some cartoons with you, you little Velcro baby.” Sirius instructs, seeming eager to get his brother to go away, but he ends his sentence by kissing him on the top of his head.

“Breakfast?” Regulus asks.

“No, you're just gonna starve today.” Sirius quips sarcastically with an eye roll, but the moment he says it Remus watches Sirius’ eyes go wide with regret and Regulus’ eyes fill with a fresh round of tears.

“I'm sorry, I'll be good. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.” Regulus repeats immediately. Remus feels his heart crack even more as he looks at how tiny and skinny he is, even for a six-year-old and the reaction that the joke pulled from him. What this poor boy must have gone through to make him react that way is beyond Remus. 

“Come here. That was a joke, a bad joke. You will always have food here. You are safe. You are a good boy. I love you so much.” Sirius promises as he hugs Regulus close, muttering soothing words in French as he rubs his brother’s back up and down. Remus watches the way Sirius strokes his thumb over Regulus’s knuckles back-and-forth and the boy pretty much melts into the touch and calms down quickly. 

“Cuddle me?” Regulus asks, pleading with large owl-like eyes.

“Of course, love.” Sirius smiles and turns on his side, facing Remus and cuddling Regulus close to his chest so that Regulus was facing Remus.

The tiny child studies Remus for a few minutes while Sirius focuses on stroking his brother’s hair to calm him down, guilt still imminent on his features.

Remus is so surprised he almost doesn't even register the small fingers that reach out to brush his cheeks as Regulus studies him intently with one cocked eyebrow.

“You have scars on your face.” Regulus observes, referring to the criss-cross white scars that adorned his upper-body.

“Regs!” Sirius exclaims. Remus smiles and lets the child continue to trace the scars over his face with feather-light fingertips. Sirius hadn’t even asked about them yet, but the courage of a child knows no bounds.

“It's okay.” Remus says genuinely, “Yes, I have some old boo-boos on my face, I have them on my back and my arms too.” 

“They make you look cool.” Regulus tells him. “How'd you get them?”

“I got in a car accident when I was little.” Remus admits honestly.

“I have lots of scars on my back from when I was little too.” Regulus says glumly, “But they don't look as cool as yours do.”

“I think you don't need anything else to look cool. You're cool just as you are.” Remus promises him.

“I like your scars.” Regulus says.

“I like your freckles.” Remus smiles in return, reaching out very slowly with his index finger, almost painfully slowly to give the boy time to flinch away before bopping the tip of his nose. Regulus gives a tiny confused smile up at Remus.

“Alright, Freckles, give me a few minutes to hang out with Remus, then I'll make you pancakes.” Sirius interrupts.

“With chocolate chips?” Regulus asks, hopefully.

“Absolutely my little star.” Sirius promises, pushing one of the stray curls that sprawled out over Regulus’ forehead and dipped over his eyes behind his ears. “Now go brush your teeth and then bother Pete. Make sure to open the blinds, make some noise, and really jump on his bed.”

Regulus obediently hops off the bed and trots off to go find whoever Pete is.

“I'm sorry-” Sirius immediately starts but Remus cuts him off instantly.

“Don't apologize.” Remus states firmly.

“He can be a lot, especially when his routine is off. He usually does not cry ever, he’s very quiet and calm, but he was just super thrown off with me gone. I wanted to wait to tell you about the medication too. That can be a lot for some people to handle. I'm on antidepressants and he's on a few kinds of anxiety medications.” Sirius starts to babble in exactly the same panicked manner that he did last night before Remus cuts him off with a kiss.

“Don't ever apologize again.” Remus smiles, “C’mere.” The two lay down for a second together, eyes closed and enjoying their company before the pair are startled by a yelling from the room next door.

“SIRIUS!” a man yells. Sirius instantly tips his head back and laughs hysterically, flashes of the typical electric and magnetic Sirius returning to his face and making Remus’ heart thud.

“That's my roommate, Peter. He's hungover as fuck, since he went out last night. So I sent Reggie in to torment him.” Sirius laughs. “My friend group since I was in elementary school was always Peter and James. It used to be the three of us living here, but a few months after Reggie came to live with me, James moved across the hall with his girlfriend, Lily. So now Reg has his own bedroom even though he mostly sleeps with me still.”

“That's who watched him last night, right?” Remus asks.

“Yes. Usually Lily and James always watch him, Pete’s kind of a fuck up, but in a pinch he’ll do. They like using Reg as a practice kid and spoiling him, but sometimes, like last night, he’ll just freak out and only will calm down for me, so it makes going out difficult sometimes. But honestly, besides work and school Reg and I never apart. He’s kind of my partner in crime and best friend, so he just does absolutely everything with me.”

“I really like him, he's a good kid.” Remus smiles.

“I think he likes you too. He's usually painfully shy with people, and doesn't even initiate touch with anyone but me. I guess he was too busy to be shy last night, but he's usually super slow to warm up to people and a little standoffish as a whole human. He was super shy with my friends for weeks and would hide behind me instead of talking to them, but he talked to you right off the bat.” Sirius admits.

“I'm honored. Usually people are put off by my scars, he was so kind about them.”

“He's right, they make you look cool. They’re beautiful, every part of you is beautiful.” Sirius admits, leaning up to kiss him quickly.

Eventually, Sirius pulls them out of bed and says that if he doesn't make pancakes soon Regulus will send out a search party, so the pair heads to the kitchen to make them. In the clear daytime, Remus could now see the evidence of Regulus’ existence all around the house. There were pictures everywhere around the house. Framed and straightened and hung up with care. Of little Regulus as a toddler and baby. Regulus on Sirius’ shoulders. The two of them napping together. Sirius holding Regulus at his own graduation from medical school. The two of them in the courthouse. Regulus’ school pictures. The two of them at the beach. Regulus’ report card, a perfect one at that, was hung up with pride by a magnet on the fridge. The tiny pairs of shoes by the door that Remus had tripped over on the way in. Every corner of the house had some form of evidence that Sirius had put in to make sure that Regulus knew his existence was valued and present in the household. There were pictures of Sirius and his friends too, but the effort to splash Regulus’ picture all over the house is evident.

Remus can't help but smile at the familiar refreshed and energetic persona that Sirius has now as all the stress has melted from his body. Regulus sits quietly on the couch of the living room, curled into the side of a blonde man with his long hair in a bun as he types on his phone and Regulus stares intently at the television with fascination. He didn't seem to care or notice the boy curled up next to him..

“Sirius, take your puppy back.” Peter calls without looking up from his phone.

“Woof!” Sirius barks, ruffling Regulus’ hair as he passes by, making the child laugh.

Remus watches in delight as Sirius’ larger-than-life personality comes back and he sings, dances, and jokes his way through making star-shaped pancakes for the group.

James and Lily burst in at a certain point and don't even question the fact that Sirius is performing a concert using the spoon from the pancake batter as a microphone and twirling the man he brought home last night, Remus, around and around in circles before immediately sitting down for breakfast with the group. Remus watches with awe at the way Regulus brightens up and changes completely from the shy boy who crawled into bed with his brother to a witty and bright star of his own that thrived under the attention from the village of people that were raising him.

And something Remus doesn't watch, but rather feels, is the love that the group instantly gives him, a virtual stranger, without a question. And as Remus laughs harder than he's laughed in months, smiles brighter than he has in months, and feels more love in one hour than he can recall feeling for most of his life as he eats star-shaped pancakes with one hand and holds Sirius’ hand above the table. He knows without a question that this is where he belongs.

Chapter Text

For their fourth date, Remus and Sirius were supposed to go to this restaurant down by the beach that supposedly had awesome chicken parmesan, but Peter got called into work and James and Lily had plans of their own so Sirius tried to cancel due to lack of babysitter before Remus just insists that he brings Regulus along.

So, they made the reservation for three instead, and the chicken parmesan was fantastic. Now, Remus found himself taking a romantic post-dinner walk in the park at sunset, except he was holding the hand of a six-year-old instead of his date. It was strange at first, being in the park with Sirius and his child. Remus was an only child, he had no idea what kids liked to do or talk about in recreational settings, but Sirius made it easy and never let a dull moment fall upon the group.

Regulus was cool. He was a rare combination of toddler and adult as he exclaimed such serious things with a high-pitched baby voice. He climbed all over Sirius like he was a jungle-gym and constantly clung to him like he was a couch during a game of “the floor is lava”. Remus couldn't help but melt at the shrieky laugh that the boy gave at Sirius’ antics.

“Regs loves the thing where you pick him up and swing him in between you while holding his hand. James and I do it with him all the time.” Sirius insists, so now Remus of course has to try it.

“1, 2, 3!” Sirius counts off and Reg shrieks with boyish giggles, high-pitched and melodic as they lift him through the air in unison while strolling through the park.

“Again?” Regulus asks, looking up at Sirius with a beaming smile.

“Encore.” Sirius nods.

“1, 2, 3!” Sirius counts again and Reg’s laugh garners smiles from the passerbyers in the park. When you asked Remus what he pictured his life being like at 25, he didn't picture himself on his fourth date with a guy and his six-year-old, but Remus was not one to complain.

“Again?” Regulus asks, peering up at Remus this time with wide Bambi-eyes and fluttering eyelashes to compliment his shy smile.

“Of course!” Remus exclaims quickly, shocked and thrilled at being asked. The whole time thus far, Regulus had only talked directly to Sirius.

“1, 2, 3-” Remus counts, but Regulus is thrown off by the sound of a loud dog bark and squirms in mid-air causing him to trip and fall on the concrete, landing hard on his knee.

“Shit-” Remus starts forward, but before he can even move, Sirius has already scooped Regulus up with a practiced ease and settles him on his hip. Sirius instantly rolls up the legs of Regulus’ sweatpants and checks the scrape for a second before looking relieved. The scrape is tiny, but red and angry nonetheless.

Remus works in the emergency room of a hospital. He's seen stitches, breaks, bruises, and bumps of every kind on children, and they all had one thing in common, they shrieked and sobbed about their injuries. Remus would have expected the same from Regulus too, but his eyes just went wide and his face blank as he stared down at his scraped knee.

“Pull over, beep, beep.” Sirius keeps a smile on his face and doesn't even look worried as he pulls the trio to a park bench nearby and deposits Regulus on it.

“Good thing we have a doctor with us Reggie, that could have been bad.” Sirius jokes with an exaggerated silliness as he kneels down in front of Regulus. “Doctor Lupin, would you mind taking a look at this patient?” 

Remus notices that Sirius, without fail, always knows exactly what to do to comfort Regulus without hesitation. Remus knows that he is a children’s psychiatrist who specializes in working with children who have PTSD, but it seems deeper than that. Sirius just knows Regulus. He anticipates his next move and never seems surprised or thrown off. Sirius told Remus that Reggie sees one of his co-workers, Mary, every week on his own for his own psychiatry sessions, and that he gets seen at school by, Marlene, for regular school-psychology appointments, but that even so, Sirius’ presence seems to be a therapy of its own right for Reg.

“I think I can squeeze him into my schedule.” Remus nods, kneeling down next to Sirius and examining the boy’s knee with a furrowed brow and an exaggerated seriousness.

“Do you think he’ll lose the leg?” Sirius jokes.

“No, no, he’ll recover.” Remus promises, soothing his thumb over the side of Regulus’ knee. Sirius pulls the backpack that he keeps slung over one-shoulder with stuff for Regulus in it and produces a small Dollar Tree first-aid kit from within and hands it to Remus.

“Hey, is it okay if I clean this up and put a Band-aid on it?” Remus asks softly. Regulus still looks far-off and frozen.

“Little lion, did you hear what Remus said?” Sirius pokes his side and frowns when Regulus doesn't respond.

“Give him a few seconds to think about it. His mind gets like Jello when he gets hurt.” Sirius explains.

“Okay.” Regulus whispers, looking down at his knee and refusing to meet anyone’s eye. Sirius sits up on the bench next to Regulus and leans against him.

“I'm gonna wipe it off, okay?” Remus announces, opening up the alcohol prep pad and holding it up, “It's gonna sting a little, but I'm gonna be as quick as possible.”

It breaks Remus’ heart when Regulus doesn't even flinch, he just stares off and looks impassive.

“I'm gonna put the band-aid on now.” Remus continues to narrate as he smoothes the band-aid over the scrape.

“Alright, one more step!” Remus cheers, trying to adopt the same contagious energy that Sirius radiates, as he sits up and patiently waits for Regulus to register what he's saying.

“What?” Regulus frowns.

“As a doctor, I can solemnly swear that this patient needs 2 scoops of ice cream, stat.” Remus orders, but softly and slowly reaches out and rubs Regulus' cheek with his thumb, smiling when the boy melts at the gentle touch.  

Remus had watched him shrug off touch or scream when touched enough times to notice in the one day that he spent with the boy, that if Regulus didn't want someone near him, he wouldn't hesitate to make it known. But those around him didn't hesitate to reach out constantly anyways, without fear of him screaming. He watched Lily cuddle him and James constantly be so rough and tumble with the boy and neither one of them were offended if Regulus expressed displeasure, they just switched up and adjusted, so Remus figures he should try the same.

He's rewarded with a small lopsided and half-hearted smile from Regulus, “I like ice cream.”

“Alright, let's get some ice cream!” Sirius cheers, “Wanna swing again, Reggie boy?”

“Again.” Reg nods, but he turns to Remus and pulls on his sleeve.

“You okay, buddy?” Remus frowns.

“Thank you, Remus.” Regulus whispers, “You're nice. You help, you don't hurt.”

“Of course, Regulus.” Remus beams and he looks up to catch Sirius beaming at the interaction with a smile so bright it makes Remus’ stomach do backflips.

---

“What's your favorite color?” Sirius asks, through a mouth-full of popcorn. The trio had gotten ice cream at the park and eaten it on a bench before naturally gravitating back to Sirius' apartment. Peter was out, so it was just the three of them hanging out and having a grand old time if Remus did say so himself.

When they got back, Sirius excused himself quietly to help Regulus with a shower for ten minutes. He also told Remus not to worry if he heard screams and quite casually said that Regulus was still a little afraid of the water because their mom used to hold him under during bath time as a punishment. Remus did not quite know how on Earth to process that information.

Now, they were curled up on the couch watching a movie with Sirius in the middle, who wasn't even paying attention to the movie and insisting on quizzing Remus on trivial things throughout it. Sirius has one arm cradling Reg to his side, and one hand is secretly linked with Remus’, fingers laced together as Sirius stroked his wrist with his thumb.

“Red.” Remus answers. “What's yours?”

“I like red and black.” Sirius smiles.

“Green.” Regulus pipes up, answering all of the questions the two asked each other.

“What's your middle names?” Remus asks, making sure to direct his question to both brothers so Regulus doesn't feel left out.

“Mine is Orion and Reggie’s is Arcturus.” Sirius explains.

“Mother liked star names.” Regulus explains, stiffening at the mention of her name even though he says it.

“Well you two have very special and interesting names. My middle name is John. How boring is that?” Remus complains.

“Try spelling Arcturus.” Regulus deadpans, unimpressed.

“You have me there.” Remus nods, wondering how a six-year-old with such a baby face has such a stoic and unimpressed demeanor constantly.

“What's your star sign?” Sirius asks, and Remus is struck by how beautiful Sirius is. How beautiful the contrast between his tattoos and pale skin are. How beautiful the veins on his hands that compliment his rings are. How the black on his nails matches his hair in the most beautiful way. 

“How should I know?” Remus asks.

“When is your birthday?” Sirius asks, but as he does, his hand snakes around to Remus’ waist and slips under his sweater and lands on the inch of skin that is shown from where his sweater rode up. It's crazy how just Sirius’ thumb stroking back and forth on Remus’ bare skin is setting every nerve in his body on fire.

“March 10th.” Remus stutters, totally thrown off.

“March 10th is a Pisces. I'm November 3rd, so I'm a Scorpio. And Regs is hmmm when's your birthday again, Reggie boy?” Sirius tilts his head back and feigns ignorance.

“You know when my birthday is, Siri.” Regulus says with a frown, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Mmmmmm, March? I wanna say the 27th.” Sirius continues with the ruse.

Regulus is less than thrilled about Sirius’ joke, “That’s James’ birthday and you know it. Be serious.”

“I was born Sirius! Your birthday is August 31st.” Sirius continues on. If looks could kill, Sirius would have been seriously in trouble.

A sudden and brief shriek makes Remus fight the urge to cover his ears as Regulus screams. “Sirius! That's Peter’s birthday. Not mine.” Regulus whines, all but stomping his foot. 

Sirius senses that Regulus is getting genuinely upset and stops messing with him immediately, “Course I know your birthday, bug! June 25th, how could I forget the best day of my life? I even have your stars and initials tattooed on my arm, right next to my heart to remind me of that day all the time.” Sirius leans over and presses a kiss to Regulus’ forehead, “Let's get you some milk and relax a little before your bedtime.”

Sirius stands to move to the kitchen, but he's stopped in his tracks by a loud glare from Regulus as he holds two arms up, demanding to be taken with on this excursion. It's weird that Sirius was only touching his side, but Remus already feels cold without him.

“Alright, alright, crabby.” Sirius relents, picking Regulus up and settling him on his hip and turns towards Remus, “Regulus is a cancer, which means he's extra crabby.”

Sirius comes back two minutes later, still carrying Regulus, who is now holding a Mickey Mouse cup with a lid and straw on it. Sirius sits next to Remus, except much closer this time and every part of their bodies are touching as they sit side-by-side. With one arm slung back around Regulus, who sat in Sirius’ lap and focused on whatever movie was on, Sirius slung the other around Remus and tugged at him until Remus’ head dipped onto his shoulder.

Remus had noticed that Sirius was very physically affectionate and touchy. It made every nerve and Remus’ body tingle and his stomach perform constant flips. He didn't grow up in a very affectionate household and he was an only child. His friends in high-school and college had all been nice, lovely, and loyal, but no one was particularly outwardly affectionate. It made Remus feel like the sun was shining on him and he was the most important person in the world when Sirius even glanced at him and gave him the time of day. Even with his kid on his lap, Sirius was still somehow able to pay so much attention to Remus that his cheeks were bright red.

Eventually, Remus felt awkward and stiff in the embrace and tried to plot some way to reach back out. Both his hands were awkwardly sitting on his knees and he couldn't think of anywhere casual to put them. God, if he could he’d run his fingers through those black curls and trace every contour and line of Sirius’ face, but he was in front of a first-grader and meant to be watching this stupid movie that Sirius insisted on watching about these cartoon emotions in a girl’s brain and an elephant with a wagon or something that Remus didn't fully understand because not an ounce of his attention was anywhere but on Sirius’ side profile. Or the sound of his laugh. Or the way that Sirius was gently and subtly rocking back-and-forth in an attempt to lull his brother to sleep. Or the hand that was back to stroking his side and making every cell in Remus’ body get goosebumps. He was really sitting here having an internal freakout and midlife crisis rolled into one in silence while he sat on the couch watching a children’s movie about a crying blue girl.

Remus, in the end, doesn't have to figure out how to reciprocate any affection because Regulus figures it out for him when he twists and turns in Sirius’s lap until he is snuggled in sideways with a death grip on Sirius’ shirt and then stretches his legs to land in Remus’ lap.

“Ask someone before you lay all over them like a yoga mat.” Sirius reminds him, but looks amused at the sight.

“Can you be like a yoga mat?” Regulus mumbles around the straw of his drink, eyes still fixated on the television screen as he intently sips on his sippy cup. Sirius’ subtle rocking and the fingers that were gently massaging Regulus’ scalp seemed to be doing the trick to put him to sleep as the drowsy boy’s eyelids fluttered in concentration to stay open. 

“Absolutely I can.” Remus confirms, hesitantly reaching his one hand and placing it on Regulus’ ankle and gently rubbing his thumb back and forth. He uses the opportunity of shifting to casually bring his free hand back and forth to cover the one Sirius has on his waists and gently intertwine their fingers. 

“Someone’s so sleepy.” Sirius points out. 

“ ‘m not.” Regulus grumbles.

“So veryyy sleepy.” Sirius sings.

Regulus just tightens his grip on Sirius’ sleeve as his eyelashes flutter closed and lightly grumbles. Sirius shares a small smile with Remus and continues to feign watching the movie as fingernails with black nail polish continue to brush through Regulus’ curls.

Sirius waits until a few minutes after Regulus has definitely gone to sleep to start to move from the comfortable position they were in.

“I'm gonna go put him down quickly.” Sirius whispers, leaning forward to scoop his brother up in his arms. Remus can't help but miss the warm and solid weight that both of the black brothers brought with them. But he also can't help but smile at the way that Sirius places the gentlest kiss on Regulus’ temple.

“Bet you didn't think you'd be doing bedtime at 9 pm and watching a Disney movie on your date, huh?” Sirius teases as he walks back into the living room.

“I had fun.” Remus admits honestly.

“You're a good sport.” Sirius says as he bounds onto the couch like an over-sized puppy, knocking Remus over and pinning his hands above his head as he straddles his waist.

“I am known for my sportsmanship.” Remus smirks, leaning up to catch Sirius’ lips in a kiss.

“Yeah that's what you get for dating a guy with a six-year-old.” Sirius smirks as he continues to kiss down Remus’ neck.

Remus pushes him forward a little bit, stopping Sirius who looks up with confusion. “Are we?”

“Are we what?” Sirius furrows his brow.

“Dating. Are we dating?” Remus confirms.

Sirius gives a lop-sided smile and tucks a strand of his own hair behind his ear before cupping Remus’ cheeks sweetly, “Would you, Remus John Lupin, be my official boyfriend?”

“Hmmm, I'll think about it.” Remus teases, gently wrapping his hands around Sirius’ neck and pulling him into a kiss. 

“Need some convincing?” Sirius offers.

“Nah, I was convinced from the moment I met you. I would love to.” Remus admits.

Chapter Text

“I have a huge favor to ask. I really wouldn't ask you if there was anyone else or any other way. But you can say no, it's totally okay, I'll ask the school if they can reschedule. Stupid fucking Peter was supposed to watch him tonight, but he bailed to see his girlfriend at the last minute and left me completely fucked over. James and Lily have this super important banquet for James’ job that they can't miss and Mary can't because she has a client-” Sirius babbles on and on sounding rushed and panicked.

“Sirius, Sirius, slow down and tell me what is the matter.” Remus stops him. He had been at home, having just showered and gotten home after his shift when Sirius called him in a panicked frenzy. They’ve been officially dating for a month and a half now and he's known Sirius for almost two months and has never heard him so frantic.

“Reg has really bad anxiety at school so he has special education services with school psych and he's in a smaller classroom, so I have a meeting tonight with his special education team. It's super important for me to go and I've canceled twice already because he can't come with me and I can't find someone to watch him and CPS checks that I go to these meetings and his teachers really want to talk with me about how he's been having a lot of trouble adjusting this school year and freaking out more than usual so they really need me to work with them so we can try and help Reg to feel better about school. But it's okay if you can’t-”

“Sirius, calm down, just ask me.” Remus pleads.

“Can you watch Reg tonight, from 7 to about 9:30. It's okay if you can't-”

“Sirius, take a deep breath for me.” Remus instructus.

“But-”

“Breath. I wanna hear you breathe deep.” Remus directs. 

He hears a reluctant deep breath.

“Sirius, of course I can watch him. I'm putting on my shoes right now.” Remus promises, and true to his word, he's already toeing on his Converse and is half out the door. “Just take it easy and I'll be there as soon as I can.”

For their month anniversary, Sirius had given him a key to his apartment, just like Lily and James have, and the code to the keypad on the door of the building so that he could let himself in whenever he wanted to.

Based on how frazzled Sirius sounded on the phone, Remus expected to walk into a chaotic whirlwind of a scene and see both brothers freaking out. Instead, he sees Regulus calm, clean, showered and in green pajamas with a frog print on them, with wet hair that is neatly combed hair, and sitting on Sirius’ lap as Sirius animatedly reads a chapter book to the boy in French. 

Sirius is dressed with his hair neatly combed back and in a sleek ponytail with dress pants, a crisp button down shirt, and a jean-jacket thrown over it all. It actually may be the calmest and happiest he's ever seen the pair.

“Hi, Remus.” Sirius smiles, a total 180 from the man who had called him just a half-an-hour before.

Boy has he been busy in that half-an-hour. Sirius left dinner portioned out, snacks laid out, and drinks all portioned out and labeled for ease for Remus. Sirius had a print out with phone numbers for James and Lily, James’ parents, Peter, the school, his doctor, his CPS caseworker, his therapist, and about a dozen other people to call in case of emergency. Sirius left a list of Regulus’ favorite movies, televisions, and books like he had never met the child before.

“He knows he can literally do whatever he wants. He can eat anything, drink anything, or do anything. He gets worried that I'll be mad at him, you can just always tell him that I would never be mad at him and he can do anything. He never watches TV, so I don't even care if he does for the whole time. I have hours of shit in the DVR and he can use a remote. Lily and I will both have our phones on us the whole time and will both be willing to step out for anything, even if you need to know how the remote works. I should be home around 9:30, but his bed-time is 9. Regs knows that he can sleep in my bed and that he doesn't have to try and go to sleep, he can just lay down and watch TV in my room. I left his milk in his cup in the fridge and it has a Post-it note on it with how long to heat it and instructions for the microwave on it. I read him a bedtime story and stuff already, but you can ask him if he wants you to read any of his books to him. All you have to do is give him dinner right when I leave, hang out with him, and then have him go lay down in my bed. He knows his bedtime routine really well. He knows about toothbrushing and everything like that and he is super independent. Right before he goes to bed, he takes one blue pill from this bottle with some water. I have all of his medications right here in this tray and all of the labels and the schedule of when he takes them. He shouldn't need anything but the one pill, but just in case of anything I have a list of what he's on written down. I have all of this written down also for you on this paper.” Sirius explains in a rush, seeming to be on the way to working himself back into hysteria. 

“If he gets anxious or nervous about me being gone, he can text or call me from your phone. He doesn't love screens, but if he wants you can turn on my iPad that's in my room and it's loaded with pictures of me and him that he likes to look at if he's worked up. He likes 80s music like ACDC, the Beatles, and Queen because it's what I listen to. I left a sweatshirt and t-shirt of mine that he likes to wear when he misses me out too.”

“We have this stupid, ancient, and cantankerous black cat, Kreacher, that I only keep around for Regulus. He's mean and will scratch anyone, except for Reg who he loves for some reason. He's our mother’s old cat from our old house and Regs wouldn't leave without him. She trained it to hate me or something and if Reg would let me the stupid cat would be out on the streets, so just ignore him if he's around. Regs also prays before bed, not in like a weird children of the corn way, in a sweet way. My mother was super religious and she got it in his head that if he didn't pray every night, I would die or something, so now he's stuck with that as a part of his anxiety.”

Remus listens patiently to the ramble and nods politely before turning to assure his boyfriend, “Sirius, I've been around him before I know that he loves Mozzarella cheese and hates the Wizard of Oz because of the scene with the water melting the witch. I can handle this, I promise.” Remus assures him, cupping Sirius’ cheek.

“Okay, okay.” Sirius takes a deep breath, “I know you have this and I trust you. You're the first person besides Peter, James, or Lily that I've ever trusted enough to watch him. I really, really trust you.” 

Remus kisses Sirius’ knuckles. “Thank you for trusting me, I know that's not easy for you.”’

“I know I seem overbearing and like I'm calling your competence into question. I know you're a doctor and you're capable of watching a fully independent six-year-old, but he's my entire world. I love him so much more than I ever thought I could love another human. And I know that you know that I'll always have to put him first, but I wanted to make sure that I never relied too much on you or made you feel responsible for taking care of him in any way because you're not at all.” Sirius admits.

“Sirius, I want you to rely on me. I don't just like Regulus because he's a package deal with you like some side that comes with a meal that I could take or leave. I really like him as a human and I've grown to really enjoy being a part of your family in any way that you let me. I want to be responsible for him tonight because I want to, not because I feel I have to. Let me help you, would you?” Remus smiles.

“God, what did I do to deserve you? Shit, it's 6:52 I have to go.” Sirius panics as he looks at the clock quickly.

“Regs, come here.” Sirius calls, and Regulus obediently picks his head up from where he's lying on the couch watching cartoons and trots over.

“Siri?” Regulus looks up expectantly. Sirius kneels down so he's eyelevel with his brother and pulls him in for a hug. Regulus goes from calm to super shy and nervous in a matter of seconds as he realizes that Sirius is gearing up to say goodbye.

“Remus is gonna watch you while I go to your school for the meeting. Remember, like we talked about, baby?” Sirius hums, “You're gonna eat your favorite raviolis with butter that I made you, play a little, and then lay down in my bed and relax a little or close your eyes until I come home. Does that sound okay?”

Regulus nods and buries his head in Sirius’ shoulder as he clings onto the back of Sirius’ jean jacket like it's a lifeline.

“Do you feel nervous?” Sirius asks gently.

Another nod in his shoulder as Regulus whines a little bit.

“Do you feel nervous about being with Remus while I'm gone or with me meeting with your school?” Sirius asks, tilting Regulus’ chin up so he can see his face.

“Can I be nervous about both?” Regulus asks, innocently like it might not be an option.

“Absolutely. About the school, you know you're not in trouble. It's not a bad meeting. Miss Meadows, Marlene, and I are just going to talk about what we can do at school to help you feel more comfortable there. They want to know what I do with you at home to keep you comfy and happy, so I'm gonna tell them about music, how you like to watch videos of animals, how you like cold cold icy water when you're anxious, and other things so that they can help you at school. You're not in trouble, nobody is mad.” Sirius explains, “And Remus is going to take such good care of you. You know him, we've hung out with him a few times. Remus is our friend and he would never let anything bad happen to you. James and Lily said they’d pop in for a minute just before they left for James’ dinner. It's gonna be okay baby. Does that sound a little better?”

“I'm gonna miss you.” Regulus frowns. Sirius smiles so brightly as he reaches out and gently places a hand on Regulus’s cheek.

“I'm gonna miss you too. I love you soooo much, my little star. You're my everything. It's you and I forever.” Sirius promises, rubbing his thumb across Reg’s cheek. “It's okay to be sad, but remember I always come back for you.”

“I love you too, Siri.” Regulus replies, looking a little calmer.

“Here, let me set up your dinner for you.” Sirius breezes, pulling the raviolis off the pot on the stove where they had been keeping warm and plating them with apple juice on the side.

“Remus have you eaten?” Sirius asks.

“No I haven't, but-” 

“Oh god, I'm so sorry. I have leftover pizza in the fridge, but feel free to help yourself to anything in the fridge or freezer. I totally forgot you had to eat too.” Sirius sighs.

“Don't worry about it. I won't starve.” Remus jokes.

“Good, my insurance wouldn't love it if you did that on the property.” Sirius laughs.

“Alright guys, I'll see you later.” Sirius smiles, and plants a kiss on Regulus’ forehead and Remus’ cheek before slipping out.

For a second, both Regulus and Remus look at each other with panic in their eyes while they try to figure out what to do next.

But then, Remus snaps out of it and slips into an easy routine. He heats up Sirius’ leftover pizza and watches Regulus eat while humming to himself and kicking his legs back and forth. 

Regulus doesn't push him to talk, knowing that Regulus will talk when he needs him, but he makes sure to narrate his choices and moves, pretending to talk to himself but really doing it for Regulus. 

When they finish eating, Remus has Regulus pick out a show and the two watch together in companionable silence. Regulus doesn't quite curl up next to Remus like he would with Sirius, but he sits next to him on the couch, which Remus considers a victory. 

It’s going pretty breezy if Remus does say so himself. Regulus is even starting to chat a little bit when he feels the need. It all feels so natural to Remus. Regulus is calm and regulated, and honestly Remus is having a great time and feels relaxed himself. Then James Potter bounds in. 

Regulus lights up instantly and beams as he runs up to the pair, instantly gluing himself to James.

Regulus loves James. Sirius, has perfectly balanced the duality of being an older-brother and a father, but James was all older-brother. He was rough and tumble, outrageously silly, but also so solid and safe that Regulus couldn't help but melt when he held him. James knew the name of every car and dinosaur that Regulus had and would sit on the floor next to him for hours and play. Besides Sirius, James was the first person Regulus let hold him. The first person Regulus trusted to help and not hurt. If Sirius was not around, the next best thing was his best friend James. James was Regulus’ godfather and if anything ever happened to Sirius, he was set up to take care of Regulus.

Regulus loved Lily. She always smelled good and gave the best cuddles. She would sit for hours with Regulus on her lap and read books with him, and did all of the voices super well. She talked to him like he was precious, but also like he was an adult. Lily gave him the kind of maternal love and affection that Regulus craved and would sing him the best lullabies while rocking him ever-so-gently to sleep. Lily taught him things and caught on that Regulus loved to learn faster than anyone else. She challenged him and believed in him in a way that no one else had ever done before. Sirius took amazing care of Regulus, but Lily was the one who taught Sirius how to do things like comb and condition hair and how to check for fevers like a mom. When it was father’s day at school, Regulus made his project for Sirius, but when it was mother’s day, Lily got the mother’s day craft he made in class with Lily written in the acrostic poem instead of mom. Even though Regulus wasn't being raised b a mother and a father, he had no shortage of people that loved him around.

“Hi, Reg-Reg.” James cheers, barging in and scooping the boy up in his arms instantly and spinning them around in circles. James is in a suit with no tie and his collar open as Lily, looking perfectly put together in a dress, chases after him with a tie.

Remus springs up and loiters awkwardly by couch, feeling awkward and out-of-place as suddenly as Regulus’ full attention goes to the fact that two out of his favorite three people in the whole world just walked in.

“Hi Remus.” Lily smiles, before her eyes are caught by the spread on the table.

“Oh Regs! You poor boy! Are you okay?” James coos, placing kisses on Regulus’ head and swinging the boy around. A switch turns on in Regulus and it's like all of a sudden he remembers he's supposed to be upset.

“Siri’s gone. You're going.” Regulus pouts, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hands.

“I would so much rather stay here with you then go to this stupid boring dinner.” James moans, dropping to the couch dramatically and pulling Regulus with him into the dramatic flop.

Remus winces as he realizes that James is inadvertently making the boy sadder.

“James, your company is hosting a dinner in your honor, you ungrateful prat.” Lily says with an eye roll as she examines the meds on the counter and the list Sirius left out.

“I don't wanna go!” James whines, dropping his head on Regulus' shoulder.

“James, Si left Remus a list of instructions for every step of the night, including instructions on how to heat up Reg’s bottle.” Lily snorts.

“Sirius has just as much separation anxiety from Reg as Reg has from him.” James says with an eye-roll. 

“Really?” Remus frowns.

“When he adopted Reggie, he switched all his classes to online so that he could stay home with him. He didn’t even leave me alone with him until a year later when he needed to go in-person for an exam. Pads hates being apart from him, so Regs just became our fourth friend in the friend group. So we all cleaned up our acts a little to support Sisiru, and we brought Regs everywhere with us. If kids weren't allowed, we didn't want to anyway.” James explains, while gently rocking the boy back and forth.

Remus knew Sirius didn't drink anymore. He hasn't since he started the custody battle against his parents and they accused him of having an alcohol problem. He used to get requested to submit a test for alcohol and had to go to AA because of the fuss his parents made, so Sirius just stopped and his whole lifestyle changed overnight in order to adopt Regulus and meet the stringent CPS requirements.

“The one semester of med school where he had the night class on a Tuesday was a nightmare.” Lily frowns at the thought.

“Besides school things for him or Reg, they never separate. Merlin, it was a nightmare when Reg first started school for the both of them. He didn't start leaving Regs alone for things for his own fun until he met you. First time Pads ever attempted to sleep apart from him was that date where you met Regs.” James smiles.

“I miss Siri.” Regulus pipes up, sad again all-of-a-sudden.

“Pobrecito.” James coos, “So sad, show me some smiles.” 

James picks up Regulus and throws Regulus in the air as he spins his around and tickles him, causing the boy to shriek with laughter.

“James, don't rile him up.” Lily chastises as she breezes into the room.

Remus is struck by just how effortlessly beautiful and intimidating she is.

“Yeah, yeah, mom.” James teases, stopping and settling back on the couch with Regulus on his lap.

Lily sits next to James and Regulus instantly places his legs in her lap, seeming comfortable and routine. Remus could almost laugh at the way that Lily, in her elegant gown, and James, in his perfectly pressed suit, looked so fancy in comparison to the little boy with green frog pajamas and black socks with white stars on them, strewn across his lap.

“Sweet boy, did Sirius read you a chapter in your book before he left?” Lily asks, gently smoothing back the hair from Regulus’ forehead.

“He did. Are you gonna read more to me?” Regulus asks, puppy dog eyes wide and full as he gazes up at Lily.

“Not tonight, my little bookworm.” Lily tells him honestly. “Tomorrow after you see Mary, I can come over and read with you a little, but for tonight I have to go with James. You're having fun with Remus though, he's taking good care of you I see.”

“You show Remus your magnet blocks yet?” James suggests.

Regulus shakes his head no.

“Go show him the blocks in your room, sweet pea. James and I have to go now.” Lily instructs, gently helping Reglus to stand.

“I wish you could stay and play.” Regulus frowns.

“I'll miss you, baby Black. I'll see you in the morning for breakfast.” James says, hugging Regulus before setting him down on the ground.

The pair leaves and once again, Remus is left alone with Regulus in an awkward silence but this time Regulus seems completely sad and unsettled.

“Let's go see those blocks!” Remus cheers, “I've never seen your room. Is it okay to show me it, or do you want to bring the blocks out here?”

“In my room.” Regulus mumbles, seeming dejected and sad.

Regulus’ room has dark blue paint on the walls with hand-drawn sketches of the stars in white pen-paint that Sirius drew and glow-in-the-dark stars strewn across the ceiling. He didn't have a race car bed and toys strew everywhere like Remus assumed he would. He had plain dark green bedding, a neat cube organizer that had labels where all his toys were stored, and a picture of Sirius and him on his nightstand. Regulus did have a stuffed lion sitting on his bed and a cat bed in the corner where Remus assumes their cat must live in, but not much about his room was personable. Sirius said that Regulus rarely spends time here, but Remus at least expected a little more life in the place.

“Sirius did an amazing job on the walls!” Remus says enthusiastically. 

“Siri is a good artist.” Regulus says, sounding like Remus was stupid for not knowing it. Regulus’ whole attitude changed, like he had suddenly realized what a downgrade having Remus watching him was from Lily, James, or Sirius.

“Want to show me what you can build with your blocks?” Remus suggests. Regulus just ignores him and continues meticulously building.

Most kids his age played rough and tumble. They built things to knock them over and played messy and loud. Regulus played with his toys silently and in an orderly fashion, lining everything up with precision.

“What are you building?” Remus tries.

“A block tower.” Regulus deadpans, clearly annoyed at having to state the obvious.

“Can I build something too?” Remus asks, not wanting to grab from the child without his permission and wanting to show that he respects Regulus’ space and belongings.

“Sure.” Regulus nods.

“I'm gonna build a barn for some farm animals to go in.” Remus narrates.

“But it's not a barn and I have no animals.” Regulus reminds him.

“We have to use our imaginationnnnn.” Remus sings, booping Regulus on the nose in hopes of making him laugh.

Regulus looks like if it was socially acceptable to bite Remus, he would have done it. Remus got the hint that he was starting to annoy the child, and backed off a little, focusing on building his pretend barn while Regulus silently observed his building like he was an OSHA inspector and made adjustments and extensions on it.

“Is yours done?” Remus asks.

Regulus nods.

“It's missing something.” Remus tells him.

“What?” Regulus frowns as he scrutinizes his building like it's missing a cornerstone somewhere.

Remus takes a triangle piece and puts it very carefully on the top of the tower, “A flag! Sirius is going to love seeing this when he gets back.”

“He won't see it, we have to put it away when toy time is over.” Regulus says seriously, like this was a common rule.

“I'm sure Sirius wouldn't mind if we left it out to show him.” Remus promises.

“Remus! We have to clean it up! We can't leave a mess on the floor.” Regulus whines, looking stressed out. Remus feels his heart hammer at the sight of the boy getting worked out and his brain scrambles to de-escalate the situation.

“What if, I take a picture of it and I can text it to Sirius. That way he gets to see it and we clean it up. Does that sound okay, or is that a bad idea.” Remus proposes carefully.

Regulus ponders the efficacy of the idea for a few moments looking like he should be stroking his chin in contemplation.

“Good idea.” He finally decides.

“You should get in the picture, so Sirius knows that I have not lost you.” Remus tries.

Regulus hesitantly agrees, and sits next to his tower with a small twitch of his lips, looking more like he was held at gunpoint than thrilled to be there, but holding a thumb up nonetheless.

Remus makes sure to show the picture to Regulus and let him watch Remus send it so that he doesn't think people are talking about him without him there.

“Alright, do you want to clean up now?” Remus asks.

Regulus nods.

“Do you want to play with something else, or all done playing?” Remus tries a menu of options.

“All done.” Regulus nods.

“Would you like to watch TV, read a book, have a snack, or something else?” Remus asks.

“Can I choose two?” Regulus asks, peering at Remus curiously like he was trying to gauge what type of game the sandy-haired man was playing at.

“You could choose as many as you want.” Remus responds carefully, not wanting to set any minimum or maximum and impose undue stress on the already-anxious child.

“Can I get a snack and watch TV?” Regulus asks very carefully.

“Absolutely, let's go look at the snacks Sirius left for you.” Remus nods enthusiastically.

Regulus picks some pre-cut slices of mozzarella cheese, a package of Goldfish, and a cold water bottle that Sirius left for him in the fridge.

To Remus’ surprise, the cat that he was beginning to think was a myth was waiting on the couch.

“Keacher!” Regulus squeals, contagious toddler-energy flowing from him as he beelines towards the cat. Remus has heard nothing but nasty things about this cat. 0 star reviews from everyone who has encountered it. Sirius sneers about this cat, kind Sirius who goes out of his way to save baby squirrels and puts spiders outside. Peter often jokes about the different ways to off the cat, but never around Regulus or Sirius says he’ll freak out. 

The reviews on this cat made it sound like the devil incarnate, but Regulus picks up the old, scraggly, under-weight black cat and snuggles it to his chest like a teddy bear.

“You mustn't pet Kreacher, he doesn't take kindly to strangers.” Regulus informs him in all seriousness, sitting down on the couch with the cat snuggled in his lap.

“Wasn't planning on it, scout’s honor.” Remus promises.

“Siri says he's a mean old cat, but he doesn't understand Kreacher. Kreacher is nice.” Regulus assures Remus, “He just wants his space. Mother was mean to him, so he can be scared.”

“I believe you.” Remus nods.

Regulus seems content to snack on his preferred snacks and watch DVR episodes of old Rugrats episodes. Kreacher lasts all of 7 minutes before yowling to be let go, and Regulus lets him easily.

“Good night Kreacher.” Regulus smiles kindly.

Around 8:30, Remus reminds the boy of the time and goes to warm up his milk cup for Regulus. Regulus takes it easily, and leans his head against Remus on the couch as he watches TV and drinks his milk. Remus tries not to show how excited he is with the small victory.

At 8:50, as per Sirius’ instruction, Remus reminded the curly-haired boy the time and asked him if he wanted to start his night time routine. Regulus puts his wrappers in the garbage, his cup in the sink, shuts the TV and the lights off, double checks the door is locked, looks that the stove is off, brushes his teeth, flooses, and gets ready to get into bed.

Remus is ready to call this night a piece of cake. Super successful and honestly pretty easy. Remus did not see what all the fuss was about. All he had to do was tuck the first-grader in, let him watch cartoons in Sirius’ bed, and then hang out until Sirius came home any minute now. How could this possibly get messed up?

“Ready for your meds, Regulus?” Remus asks, cheerily, ready to check his last thing off thr to-do list. “I can go grab them from downstairs.”

“I forgot about my meds.” Regulus says, turning ghost white.

“No you didn't. Let's take them now. Sirius left them in the kitchen.” Remus says, trying to shepherd the boy into just walking the 15 feet to the kitchen to see them.

“Forgot them. Supposed to take them before brushing my teeth.” Regulus whimpers.

“I'll go get the bottle for you, and then we can re-brush your teeth.” Remus offers.

“I'm bad, I'm sorry. I'm bad. Don't be mad at me. I'm sorry.” Regulus begins to apologize profusely.

“You're not bad. You're good. It's okay. You're okay.” Remus tries to copy what he's heard Sirius say to him before. “Let's come to the kitchen, take meds, and watch TV in Sirius’ room.”

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry don't be mad.” Regulus begs.

“You're not bad, buddy. I'm not mad. It's okay, let's just go take the meds. Please.” Remus begs in return.

Remus manages to coax Regulus into the kitchen, but once they get there Remus notices that Regulus’ chest is heaving up-and-down rapidly with fear.

“Blue pill.” Remus narrates, easily taking the one pill out and opening the Poland Spring bottle that Sirius had left in the fridge.

“Alright, kiddo, let's take your blue pill and some water quickly and then we can watch some more cartoons. Sirius should be home any minute now and then he will-” 

And at that moment, as Remus quickly kneels down with the open bottle to meet Regulus’ level like Sirius always does, a splash of water splashes up and splatters Regulus’ face.

The effect is instantaneous as Regulus’ eyes go wide and he lets out a piercing shriek that could break glass.

“No! No! I'm sorry! No, please don't hurt me! Please don't!” Regulus shrieks, sobbing and screaming.

“I would never hurt you.” Remus goes wide eyed and kneels cautiously in front of the sobbing child.

Regulus frantically tries to rub his face, little hands pawing at his own eyes in a frenzy, so Remus steps forward and uses his own shirt to rub off the boy’s face.

“There, you're okay. You're all dry. No one is going to hurt you as long as I'm around.” Remus promises.

Remus is more than surprised when Regulus surges forward and flops into his arms, burying himself in Remus’ neck. Remus sits back on the floor and cradles the boy in his arms, gently rocking with fear-filled eyes that matched Regulus’.

“I want Sirius.” Regulus sobs uncontrollably, bored-line hyperventilating.

“I know, I know. You're doing so good, he’ll be home any second now.” Remus promises, gently rubbing Regulus’ back in circles, “Calm down, breathe with me.”

“I c- can't- can't breathe!” Regulus sobs, chest heaving rapidly and face reddening as he screams.

“You can breathe. In and out, you can do it.” Remus coaxes.

“I ne- need Sirius.” Regulus chokes out.

“I know, I know. What does he usually do to calm you down?” Remus tries.

“I don't- I don't know.” Regulus gasps, struggling to catch his breath.

“Breathe for me, you can do it. I have you, you're okay.” Remus coaxes, holding him close.

“Want Sirius.” Regulus sobs.

“Regulus.” a sudden and even-toned voice sounds out, pulling both Remus and Regulus out of their hug and sending them scrambling apart.

Sirius stands in the kitchen, face expressionless and eyes guarded as he approaches cautiously, “Hey little star, it is time to take your meds.”

“I- I can't.” Regulus stutters, stepping back further and further, hands clinging back to cover his eyes.

“Put your hands at your sides.” Sirius instructs.

“I- I- I want Sirius.” he stutters, covering his eyes.

Sirius crosses the room and kneels down in front of his brother.

“Little frog, look up.” Sirius instructs as he gently pokes one of the frogs on Regulus’s shirt for emphasis.

Regulus just whimpers.

“Regulus, look up.” Sirius repeats again, this time without any inflection  in the same calm and authoritative tone that Remus has never heard him use before. Like he was being compelled to with magic, Regulus lifts his head up instantly.

“Who am I?” Sirius presses.

“Sirius.” 

“Yeah baby, it's Sirius.” Sirius nods.

“Sirius!” Regulus whimpers, reaching out to be held desperately. 

Sirius picks up his brother and takes a deep sigh when Regulus settles right in on his hip.

“Time for meds, little star.” Sirius says.

“Blue pill?” Regulus asks.

“Did you take your blue pill?” Sirius frowns.

“I didn't.” Regulus whimpers, tears beginning to flow again.

“Okay, you're gonna take blue and white right now.” Sirius decides. Remus recognizes it as the as-needed pill for emergencies and feels his heart thud with guilt. He couldn't even watch Regulus for two hours without an emergency.

He helps the boy take both pills, but Regulus bursts into tears right after taking them.

“Shhh, you're all worked up baby.” Sirius coos.

Regulus snuffles, rubbing his sleeve over his nose. “Missed you, don't like when you're gone.”

“I don't like being apart from you either, I missed you too.” Sirius admits, nuzzling his cheek against the top of Regulus’ head affectionately.

“Remember, the white pill makes you feel super sleepy. Let's get you tucked in so that you don't have to fight it.” Sirius directs.

“Don't ‘member.” Regulus slurs.

“That's okay baby, you haven't taken the white pill in a while. You feel super sleepy after you take it, so you like to curl up somewhere warm and take a nap. Then when you wake up, you feel calm and better.” Sirius reminds him, starting to walk towards his bedroom.

“Want- wan-” Regulus stutters.

“Your lion.” SIrius predicts.

“Yes.” Regulus whimpers.

“Remus, could you grab his lion from his bedroom and bring it to us while I lay him down?” Sirius asks.

Remus feels a little silly for how fast he ran the five feet towards Reg’s room and the speed at which he dashed to grab the stuffed lion.

Sirius is sitting on the bed, gently stroking Regulus’ hair and humming Beautiful Boy by The Beatles. 

“Thank you, Re. Here, sweet boy, I have your lion.” Sirius tells him, tucking the stuffed animal under Regulus’ arm.

“Tired.” Regulus mumbles.

“Then close your eyes sweetheart.” Sirius hums, stroking his fingertips over the bridge of Regulus’ nose in a continuous downward sweep.

It doesn't take more than a minute before Regulus is completely passed out and Sirius is standing, tiptoeing, and motioning for Remus to follow him.

“He's passed out completely.” Sirius tells Remus, opting not to close the door.

“Sirius, I'm so sorry-” Remus starts but he's cut off when he realizes how wide and genuine Sirius' smile is.

“Don't you dare apologize. He freaks out sometimes, it's not avoidable. I was only at the meeting because he freaks out like that at school sometimes. But I came home to find you on the floor holding him. He never lets anyone but James, Lily, or I hold him. He won't even let Pete hold him like that.” Sirius smiles, eyes glistening slightly as he reaches up to cup Remus’ cheek.

“He just got so upset so fast. I'm so sorry he had to take the emergency me-”

“I have that bottle for a reason. It happens and it's unavoidable. The first time he freaked out with Peter watching him, Peter just called me and told me to come home and was so scared that he refused to go near Reg. You did EVERYTHING right. I never thought I'd find someone that he trusts like that. I'm so grateful for you. God I love you.” Sirius declares, bursting forward to kiss him.

Chapter Text

It was three months into knowing Sirius when Remus finally understood why on Earth his endlessly and boundlessly energetic boyfriend took a white pill from an orange bottle twice a day. Of course he knew the diagnostic and medical reason as to why, but he didn't get why Sirius would need an antidepressant.

It had been two entire days since Sirius had answered any of his texts, which was abnormal because Sirius was a serial texter. He texted Remus good morning, good night, and kept him apprised of every waking thought in between those two timeframes. It took two days of Sirius not answering and 47 hours of Remus tearing his hair out in a pacing contemplation as he chewed on his worried lip in between check-in texts and calls before deciding to pop over. He had been gifted a key and told to come over anytime he wanted and Remus did want to come over. So why did it feel like he was breaking and entering to use the key he was given to enter the apartment that he was told to come to anytime?

It was a Thursday night at 8 PM, and on Thursdays, Regulus and Sirius would stay at Sirius’ office till 5 as Sirius gave out therapy and Regulus received it. Then the two would come home, do homework, paperwork, puzzles, make Playdough food, do a science experiment, play a board game, scavenger hunts, word searches, crafts, make their own Hibachi, make spaghetti tacos, take walks, or whatever kind of nonsense that Sirius could dream up from Pinterest on his lunch break until it was bedtime. If it was Sirius and Regulus alone, Sirius hated to use screens to occupy his brother, so he was always looking for some new activity or thing to do to occupy them both and spend quality time together without TV. Then, a few minutes before bedtime, Sirius would turn on cartoons and let Regulus wind down while drinking milk from his sippy cup before going through his bedtime routine.

Remus was always impressed by the fact that Sirius had an endless stream of ideas of new and fun things in the house and how fun Sirius could make the simplest things. That's why it alarmed him to walk in on a Thursday and see that the brothers weren't using pool noodles with shopping bags taped on the end as fishing rods to see who could scoop up the most throw pillows scattered on the floor with pictures of fish that they colored in taped on them. Or making an Eiffel Tower out of Cheese-it's.

Remus knew they were home because Sirius’ keys were by the door and there were light5s on, but the living room and kitchen were devoid of the usual life that emanated from it.

“Sirius?” Remus asks softly, tapping on the closed bedroom door to Sirius’ room where he can hear the low rumbling of the television. 

“Who is it?” Remus hears Regulus call.

“It's Remus.” Remus responds.

“You may come in.” Regulus grants permission easily.

 It was the most natural thing in the world to see Sirius holding Regulus. In fact, a good 75% of the time that Remus was with them, Sirius was holding his brother in some shape or form. But he had never seen Regulus taking care of him.

Regulus was sitting up in bed against the headboard, eyes flickering from the television in front of him, down to Sirius, and back up again intermittently as he chatted to Sirius in French, a language that Remus knew they only used when upset to comfort each other. Sirius, was laying with his head in his brother's lap as he laid under the covers, eyes staring off into space as Regulus combed through Sirius’ hair with his fingers, like his older brother usually does to him. Someone, obviously Regulus, has placed Regulus’ stuffed lion on Sirius’ chest, and Sirius has the lion loosely tucked under his arm.

“Remus, you must be quiet. Siri is quite sad and he gets a rather nasty headache when he is sad so we have to keep our voices at a whisper.” Regulus instructs him, sounding as prim and proper as someone with a front tooth missing can.

Regulus leans down and whispers something to Sirius in French, and the only word Remus can catch is his own name, which makes him feel uncomfortable and awkward as he lingers by the doorway. Remus knows that both brothers know French, Italian, and English, as all three were used in their house growing up. Sirius is properly versed in reading, writing, listening, and speaking French, Italian, Spanish, and English, while Regulus, having been only three when he left his home where his mother used to speak French and Italian to him, could only speak and listen to Italian and French, where as he was being taught English in school. Sirius, who is fully fluent enough to dream in all three languages, teaches his brother reading and writing in French when he can.

At the mention of Remus’ name, Sirius’ light gray eyes snap up and focus on Remus, softening lightly when they see him. 

“Hey, Smiley Fry!” Peter appears in the doorway behind Remus, “Come hang with me in the living room for a little bit. Let's leave Sirius and Remus alone.”

Regulus blinks indignantly, “Absolutely not! Siri needs me!”

“Remus is a doctor, he can watch him for a little bit.” Peter counters, looking ready to pick Regulus up and carry him out while Regulus looks like he was three short seconds from shrieking at the top of his lungs at a volume that could shatter glass if anyone touched him. 

“He needs me! He's always there for me when I don't feel well, and I'm always there for him. We only have each other. I can't leave him when he's sad.” Regulus whines.

“Regulus refuses to leave Sirius when he's down like this.” Peter rolls his eyes.

“It's okay, go with Peter. You're such a good boy, I love you so much.” Sirius croaks, voice raspy and strained as he looks up at his brother. He continues to whisper something in French or Italian that Remus can't quite make out, but whatever it is convinces the boy to leave without a fight. Though, Remus is not surprised because, unlike any other six-year-old in the world, Remus has never seen him disobey his guardian.

“Fine!” Regulus reluctantly gives in as he walks towards Remus, “Remus, I'm leaving him with my lion to make him feel better if he misses me. You mustn't be too loud or touch him without asking. He is super tired, so if he feels sleepy you need to let him rest. He needs rest to get better.” Regulus stresses.

“I see that you have been taking such good care of Sirius. You are such a good brother. You'd make a good nurse someday.” Remus compliments the six-year-old, whose bedside manner is unexpectedly superior.

“Duh. Who else would take care of him? I'm gonna sit in the living room with Peter only because Sirius asked me too nicely, and you better not make him sadder while I'm gone.” Regulus warns, storms brewing in his eyes.

“I promise you, I will take care of Sirius and make sure nothing happens to him.” Remus swears, leaning down to ruffle Regulus’ hair.

“Let's go, Smiley Fry.” Peter rolls his eyes, holding his hand out for Regulus. Regulus turns and gives Sirius one last sad look before closing the door behind him.

“I'm going to steal some pajamas.” Remus intones, pulling off his street clothes and replacing them with an old Queen t-shirt and a pair of Sirius’ Star Wars print pajama pants.

Then, Remus wastes no time slipping under the covers next to Sirius, who is playing with the threads of the covers.

“You raised a magnificent and loving boy.” Remus smiles, knowing Sirius always loves compliments related to Regulus.

However, this proves to be the wrong thing to say as Sirius’ lips turn down in a frown instantly.

“Did I say something wrong?” Remus frets.

“Sometimes I wish I didn't have to raise him.” Sirius croaks.

“That's natural, don't feel guilty-”

“No, I wish his parents loved him. They know exactly how special he is and what they're missing out on, and they choose to miss it all anyway. I wish I could be more for him.” Sirius frowns.

“You are everything and more for him.” Remus promises.

Sirius just frowns again, staring off a bit. 

“Can I do anything for you?” Remus asks.

“There is one thing, but it’s stupid.” Sirius sighs.

“Anything.” Remus promises.

“Can you rub my hair like Regs was doing? It was doing wonders for my headache.” Sirius admits. 

“Of course.” Remus smiles, sinking his fingers into the inky curls instantly. “Does talking help? Or hurt?”

“Helps, but I don’t know what to talk about.” Sirius admits.

“Regulus makes you smile.” Remus observes.

“Always.” Sirius affirms with a nod. 

“What do you and Reg do for holidays?” Remus asks.

“We got to James’ parents house. Holidays are hard, for both of us, so we spend the morning together trying to process and then go and be with the Potters.” Sirius details.

“What's your favorite holiday?” Remus asks.

“I quite like Christmas.” Sirius says after a few seconds of mulling it over.

“What about it?” Remus presses.

“Making cookies and seeing how excited James gets to decorate shit. I also like seeing Reg open presents, and making up for his bad holidays with good ones. Regulus also likes the old cartoon American Christmas movies, so we curl up with hot cocoa on Christmas Eve and watch as many as we can.” Sirius recounts.

“I love those movies too. I would love to spend a Christmas with you guys someday.” Remus admits.

“Frosty The Snowman appealing to you?” Sirius croaks, a ghost of a smile twitching at his lips.

“Well yes, but also you two are appealing to me too.” Remus states the obvious, “I would watch paint dry on TV with you guys.”

“Don't. Boring.” Sirius tells him, but his eyes look a little lighter as he does.

“Nothing with you is ever boring.” Remus promises.

“It's stupid.” Sirius sniffles, scrubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands to keep the tears at bay, “So fucking stupid.”

“What is, my love?” Remus asks patiently.

“Why I'm down.” Sirius whimpers.

“Nothing about you could ever be stupid. You are the bravest and strongest person I know.” Remus reminds him.

“I saw her.” Sirius admits.

“Who?” Remus frowns.

“My mother.” Sirius nods. “We live about forty-minutes from my childhood home, but every now and again I run into her somewhere casual and it never fails to destroy me.”

Remus had honestly never given much thought to what the Black mother and father were currently up to. Both Black brothers only talked about their parents in the sense of how they were affected by living with them. Come to think of it, Remus only knew what happened to the Black parents at the house, he never even knew anything about the custody battle because Sirius hated talking about it.

“You saw her where?” Remus asks.

“Grocery store. I had a doctor’s appointment twenty minutes away, and I popped in for some ice pops as a treat for Regs for being so brave while James watched him, and I saw her.” Sirius reveals.

“Did she talk to you?” Remus asks.

“No, that's the stupidest part. All she did was stare at me for a few seconds before walking away while I stood there frozen like a useless tree. But she stared at me in this way, the way that haunts my nightmares. She stares at you like you're the smallest bug in the world and she could easily crush you. I'm 24 and I'm still scared of her.” Sirius sighs.

“Oh, sweetheart, you have every right to be. You are so brave.” Remus rushes out, moving to hug Sirius in his arms.

Remus expected Sirius to cry, but the tears never fell, instead being replaced by a blank stare for a while. The pair lay down, facing each other for a while and Remus just lays there staring lovingly after Sirius loses the energy to talk.

Remus and Sirius are so wrapped up in the moment that they don't even notice the background noise of the rain until a thunder clap makes them both flinch.

“Fuck, Reggie. How long has it been storming?” Sirius gapes in horror. Another unspoken fear of Regulus’ was storms, and Remus was sure there was some traumatic and very valid reason for the boy to be petrified but claps of thunder scare the shit out of him.

“Regulus! Peter! Come here!” Remus calls, preparing to get out of bed when Peter walks in, holding a screaming and struggling Regulus to his chest.

“Fuck.” Sirius whimpers, “How did I not hear this?”

“NO! NO! I have to be good for Siri!” Regulus screams, thrashing in Peter’s hold. It clicks in Remus’ brain that Regulus is struggling to leave Sirius room, not to get down.

“Reggie.” Sirius calls from bed, frantically attempting to sit up, but failing to find the energy.

“I have to be good! I can't make trouble. Not supposed to be a problem!” Regulus sobs and screams.

“He's been fussy like this since the storm started like 15 minutes ago, and I suggested coming to see you, Pads.” Peter supplies.

“Reg, Regs, come here. It's okay, come here I want you here. Hey look at me, it's okay.” Sirius pleads desperately. Regulus is too distraught to hear him and Sirius is too weak to stand and get closer.

Remus stands up and crosses to the door, motion to Peter to set Regulus down. 

Peter does and Regulus curls up with his knees to his chest, sobbing. Remus sits down patiently across from him and waits till he's calmed down enough to be receptive to words.

“Regulus, you're not bad, you're not trouble, you're not a problem. You're a good boy.” Remus promises.

“Good boy?” Regulus repeats, peeking his head up with tear filled eyes.

“You're such a good boy, come climb in with Sirius and I. We’ll all take care of each other, huh?” Remus suggests.

Regulus thinks it over for a few seconds before holding his tiny hands up to be held. Remus instantly complies and picks the boy up, rubbing his back instinctively as Regulus calms down.

“Alright, easy does it.” Remus hums, “Let's say goodnight to Peter. Goodnight Peter.” Remus models.

“Night Peter.” Regulus repeats.

“Night night, smiley fry.” Peter winks, closing the door behind him.

As soon as Remus places Regulus on the bed, Sirius bursts forward and scoops him into his arms on his lap.

“I love you so much. You're my favorite human. You are so perfect.” Sirius whispers, sighing in relief as he hugs the boy close, tucking his head under his chin.

Regulus yawns and cuddles in close.

“Did you brush your teeth?” Sirius asks.

“Teeth brushed.” Regulus confirms that Peter started Regulus’ bedtime routine with him.

“Rems, can you get him some water? Let's do meds and go to bed, huh sleepy face?” Sirius hums, but the look of guilt and panic hasn't subsided yet.

Remus passes both Black brothers a water bottle and their respective orange pill bottles.

“There ya go.” Sirius smiles, watching Regulus happily drink his water, “Reg is like a plant in that a little bit of sunlight and water solve all his problems.”

“Story?” Regulus asks, a creature of habit, looking up innocently.

“Not tonight baby, tomorrow I'll read you three chapters to make up for all the days I missed. I'm sorry your routine has been so thrown off, I'm going to try to be better for you tomorrow.” Sirius promises, looking guilty as he threads his fingers through Regulus’ curls.

“I could read.” Remus volunteers.

Regulus just glares at Remus like he had stolen the last cookie from the cookie jar.

“Alright, bad suggestion.” Remus throws his hand up in surrender.

“Be nice.” Sirius whispers, poking Regulus’ side, “Let him read both of us a bedtime story.”

“Not our book.” Regulus sets his demands out carefully, bargaining like a pro.

“Not our book. Let him pick a short one that we’ve read.” Sirius instructs him.

“A baby book.” Regulus demands.

Sirius rolls his eyes, “He calls picture books baby books. Remus, can you get a book from the bookshelf in his room. Maybe the one about the pigeon and the hotdog if you can find it.”

“That's a super baby book.” Regulus points out.

“Well it's my favorite one, so tough luck. It's what I want as my bedtime story and I'm not a baby.” Sirius argues with the six-year-old.

Regulus resignedly gives in, and soon the little boy is tucked in between the both of them, with Remus sitting up against the headboard and reading a book about a little yellow duckling trying to steal a hot dog from a large pigeon.

Before the pigeon can even lose his cool about the duckling, both Black brothers are sleeping with smiles on their faces.

And in the middle of the night, when Regulus wakes up with tears streaming down his face because he had a bad dream and can't find his lion. Sirius is able to echolocate the stuffed lion with his eyes closed while remaining 98% asleep.

Remus decides that even on a "bad day", there is no where that he would rather be.

Chapter Text

Author’s note: the timeline is a little weird, but I imagined that at the two month mark of them dating, (chapter 4), was September, and they met in early July. Then chapter 5 took place at the three month mark, which would technically bring us to early-October, but this pool is heated in my imagination so imagine it's still outdoor party/pool/BBQ season in England then. Don't look too hard into it please because I have for sure and it made my head hurt.

Sirius Black was an over-texter, that much had been established. But sometimes, he could air on the blunter side of things in a manner that never failed to astound his boyfriend.

“cat finally kicked bucket” is all the notice Remus about the death of Kreacher Black an hour before he was supposed to go to Sirius’ place in the evening. That's all. No cause of death. No heads up. Nothing. Remus didn't know whether to bring flowers, champagne, or tissues when he showed up. 

He knew Sirius couldn't care less, but he would care if Regulus was devastated. But then again, sometimes in emotional situations Regulus will freeze completely and go non-verbal. The possibilities and combinations of emotions he was about to walk into were endless.

He ended up spending way too long at the shop near Sirius’s house picking out an appropriate gift to express his sympathy for the loss of a loathed cat. He bought Regulus a stuffed cat, knowing that stuffed animals bring him comfort sometimes and he doesn't have a cat one. And he settled on getting Sirius his favorite chocolate bar, because even if Sirius was totally fine he would love candy.

Usually, by the time Remus comes over, Regulus and Sirius are in the best part of Regulus' bedtime routine; where the two of them are showered, in their pajamas, and are both laying on the couch, all cuddly and sleepy as they watch television for a few minutes while Regulus drinks milk from his sippy cup. Sometimes, if Remus comes at the right time, he even walks into Sirius and Regulus curled up together reading a chapter of their book at bedtime. Sometimes, when Sirius is feeling lazy, he's laying with his head on Regulus’ lap as Regulus reads him a “baby book”, a picture book, from his school. It was always calm and peaceful as the two brothers winded down and were usually the picture of serenity and peace.

However, Sirius is in full on “dad mode”, when Remus lets himself in with his key. He's wearing a short-sleeve pajama shirt that shows off all of his tattoos, and he's laying back on the couch with his black-painted nails curled in the back of his brother's shirt as the little one sobs into his chest. He has a sad and pained look on his face as he keeps Regulus’ head tucked under his chin. Little whimpers and whines could be heard from Sirius’ shirt where Regulus felt safe enough to lay his head down and let it all out.

Remus is starkly reminded of just how much Regulus was really Sirius’ child. When something goes right or wrong, Regulus is entirely Sirius’ responsibility to comfort and guide through any situation they encounter.

Sirius looks up and places an index finger to his lip, signaling Remus to be quiet coming in. Remus comes in and sits down next to the pair silently, giving Sirius’ knee a quick squeeze of support.

“ Emotional overload .” Sirius mouths, before quickly turning his attention back to Regulus, and Remus gets the sense that the cat’s death was not going to be something anyone would take easily after all.

“You wanna get another cat?” Sirius murmurs, gently rubbing soothing circles in Regulus’ back.

Regulus shakes his head no.

“A dog then? I'm more of a dog person anyways. A puppy for my puppy.” Sirius offers.

Regulus just sobs harder, “No. It's not fair.”

“I know, it's not fair.” Sirius agrees, gentle finger tips carding through Regulus’ hair in a motion that usually at least somewhat did the trick to de-escalate his emotional meltdowns, but this time does nothing.

“We can do any animal you want. Fish? Guinea pig? A cow that goes mooooo?” Sirius tries, continuing to try and lighten the mood.

“Don't want to.” Regulus says in a petulant yet muffled tone through Sirius’ shirt. “Just want Kreacher.”

Sirius frowns and continues rubbing his baby brother’s back, looking just as sad as Regulus sounded, “I know my little star, I know it's so hard isn't it? It's okay to be sad and have big feelings about Kreacher. You're okay.” 

“Miss him.” Regulus sniffles as his chest heaves.

“Oh sweetheart, I'm so sorry baby. I know, I know. It's okay.” Sirius soothed.

“You didn't even like him.” Regulus continues to sob.

“I was teasing. I loved Kreacher too. He used to be my only friend in Grimmauld Place before you. I have known Kreacher since we got him when I was your age.” Sirius promises.

“You were mean to him.” Regulus insists. 

“I'm sorry Reggie. You were so good to him baby, you took such good care of him and made his life so good. Mother was mean to him for a very long time, but you showed him love. You were the nicest friend to him and made him feel so loved.” Sirius promises and Remus realizes just how complicated this cat was for both of them.

Regulus doesn't seem to care or notice at all that Remus was present, so Remus pulled the stuffed black cat out of his bag and pointed to Regulus, silently asking if it would help or hurt.

Sirius smiles gently and nods. Remus dreaded when Regulus cried. Remus’ heart clenched when Regulus cried and a lump in his throat appeared that he couldn’t explain.

“Hey little star, it looks like Remus has a present for you. Wanna take a look?” Sirius asks quietly.

It takes a few minutes of sniffling and soft coos from Sirius, but eventually, Regulus pops his head up when curiosity gets the better of him and looks at Remus with a red face and puffy eyes.

“Hi bud. I'm so sorry about Kreacher, I know you loved him so much and took such good care of him. I got you a little stuffed cat that you can hug if you want when you miss him.” Remus offers, holding the black stuffed cat out, leaning right against Sirius and Regulus.

Regulus looks at it for a few seconds appraisingly before reaching out to put his hand on the stuffed cat’s fur like he was feeling the temperature. It only took a few seconds before Regulus was hugging both the cat and Remus in approval.

If there was one good thing that came out of the fact that Sirius had only one family member that he spoke to, his brother, it's that Remus never had to meet the parents. He met Regulus, and boy was he judgemental at first, but after three months of knowing the boy, he can finally say that he is no longer on his shit list and Regulus no longer looks at Remus with suspicion and his eyes no longer imply that he thinks Remus is a fucking idiot. There were random cousins that Sirius mentioned, but none with whom he kept in contact. Sure, he had to meet the Potters, who were nothing but lovely, and Peter was pretty bitchy at first, but overall, Remus had it pretty easy.

However, that did not mean Sirius was off the hook entirely. After three months without meeting him, Hope Lupin was overzealous and unrelenting in her efforts to meet him. Remus wanted to do a nice easy dinner, have her over at Sirius’ apartment and cook some Italian food, and give Regulus a nice and easy time to adjust to meeting someone new.

The stars aligned in all the wrong ways the moment that Remus answered a phone call from his mom while cuddled up on the couch with Sirius a week after Remus attended the backyard burial of the Black family cat.

Regulus was having an immense trouble conceptualizing the loss of his cat who was the first family member of his that he had lost in death and not in abandonment. The little boy struggled and as a result his temper was much quicker to flare and tears were much easier to spring to the corners of his gray eyes. He was having a tough week, so Sirius announced a spa night where they painted nails, brushed hair, and even put on face masks. Eventually, Regulus asked to spend some time alone in his room, so Remus and Sirius curled up on the couch together and watched some housewife show until Remus was so rudely interrupted by the vibrating of his phone.

“Mum, I cannot throw Sirius to the wolves like that. A family barbeque with all of the extended family is way too high-stakes.” Remus made the mistake of saying in front of Sirius Black, who perceives everything as a challenge and has never backed down from one.

“Nonsense! I'm family barbecue material!” Sirius splutters. “I would love to go.”

“See!” Hope brags in triumph.

“I have to go mum, love you.” Remus frantically hangs up as he sees the situation snowballing.

“It's not that.” Remus sighs in stress, pinching his nose, “My family is so loud and overbearing, and it is way too much to throw you in the deep end on your first time meeting any of them. Some of these people don't even know me well enough to know what I do for a living or even know that I'm gay. And it's also Sunday, which only gives you two days to prepare.”

“For your information I am FANTASTIC with families. I'M the kind of guy you want to bring home to your mother.” Sirius points out.

“You are very charming.” Remus concedes, “It's not you that I'm worried about.”

“Is it Regulus?” Sirius frowns with a protective and defensive scowl at the thought.

“I honestly don't want to overwhelm him. It's a pool party and a barbeque with fifty new people that are going to want to squish his cheeks and squeal at him.” Remus admits.

“Are you embarrassed of him? Of what he can be like when he has a panic attack or a meltdown?” Sirius asks with the same protective frown that makes Remus panic. 

“No, no.” Remus panics, placing a hand on Sirius’, “The opposite. I've grown to love him so much in the small time that I've known him. I just never want him to be sad, anxious, overwhelmed, or anything but happy. Especially in a situation he doesn't have to be in, and it's my fault that he's in.”

“It's sweet that you worry about him, but let me do the worrying for him. Yes, there will be some hurdles for sure, but the thing is, if I decide that this is too much for him he won't go at all. He won't do it at all. But if we try, he’ll do it. Sure, he might not be a social butterfly and there may be tears and if all else fails, I'll have James get us early if it all goes to shit, but I realized a long time ago that if I say he can't do something then that's stopping him from ever even doing it in the first place. He's smart, capable, and better at handling things than I even realize sometimes. You should have seen what he was like when he was three, he's come miles and miles since then.” Sirius smiled softly.

“You're right.” Remus admits, feeling guilty.

“If it really worries you that much, I can leave him with James.” Sirius offers.

“No, I know you both hate being away from each other when you don't have to be. I never want to separate the two of you.” Remus frets.

“It'll be great!” Sirius chimes.

“Will Regulus be okay with a pool?” Remus asks.

“He's swam at the Potters before with me, he just clings to me the entire time like a koala and I make sure he won't get splashed or dragged in. When it's just him and I swimming and no one else, he’ll let me stick him on a raft and drag him around.” Sirius explains. “Will there be other kids?”

“Tons.” Remus confirms.

“So he’ll feel it out! He doesn't like getting splashed, so if it’s full of other people, he might not want to go in, but he's not a popsicle, he won't melt in the heat without going in. Don't sweat it.” Sirius promises. “Here, let's hear it straight from him.”

“Reggie, come here!” Sirius hollers from his position tangled on the couch with Remus. Regulus obediently appears a few seconds later, as if summoned, and looks up at the pair with wide and helpless doe-eyes that seemed to take up most of his face with how large they were. The little boy is wearing one of Sirius’ black hoodies that practically swallows him up and pajamas pants with stars on them.

“Siri?” Regulus asks.

“Regs, wanna go to a pool party on Sunday?” Sirius asks. 

“At the Potter’s?” Regulus responds automatically.

“No, at the Lupin’s.” Sirius informs him.

“Remus does not have a pool.” Regulus frowns. He had been to Remus’ apartment and had seen no such thing. 

“No but he has parents who do.” Sirius tells him. 

“Will I get splashed?” Regulus inquires, cocking his head to the side in an adorable manner.

“No baby, I wouldn't let you. You don't have to swim.” Sirius promises. “Come snuggle and talk about it, sweet boy.”

The three arranged themselves on the couch so that Regulus was sitting on Sirius’ lap and Remus was right next to them while everyone talked.

“Will you leave me alone?” Regulus asks.

“No I won't, clingy baby.” Sirius teases.

“What if you have to go to the bathroom?” Regulus asks.

“I'll take you with me, like always.” Sirius assures.

“What if you go to talk to someone?” Regulus presses.

“I always take my shadow with me.” Sirius smiles, messing with Regulus’ curls. “I won't leave you, you know that.”

“What if you have to go somewhere and you don't take me with you?” Regulus frets.

“I can be a back-up.” Remus offers. “If Sirius has to walk away, I'll stay with you until he comes back. A substitute Sirius if you will. How does that sound?”

“Okay, I'll go.” Regulus agrees, content with the amount of negotiation done this far, “Does your mom cook good food?”

“The best food! She makes great mac and cheese, I know you like mac and cheese, and I can ask her to stock up on the dinosaur nuggets that you like just in case you don't like any of what she cooks. And she's going to make her famous chocolate cake and bake cookies for dessert.” Remus exclaims excitedly.

“I like cake.” Regulus floats the idea out there.

“Chocolate cake!” Sirius sings, reaching down to pick Regulus up and fling the small child over his shoulder, spinning both around in circles and making the younger Black brother squeal with giggles as he blows raspberries into his neck. “My baby, my baby, my baby.” Sirius sings as he spins them both around, the mood changing from worried to happy in seconds.

“I love you, Siri.” Regulus smiles brightly with rosy cheeks, kissing Sirius’ cheek. Remus can't help but smile at the pair, never having seen Regulus so affectionate and happy.

“Ewww, you're all slobbery.” Sirius jokes, wiping off his cheek. “Love you too, my little star.”

The Sirius that Remus knows and loves, is covered in tattoos, has wild and messy curls, wears mostly black, and is one of the freest and most unique spirits Remus has ever met.

When Remus opens the door on Sunday morning to pick Sirius and Regulus up, he is blown away by how un-Sirius and serious Sirius looks. Both brothers were dressed in button-down shirts, light blue for Sirius and dark blue for Regulus, both making their gray eyes pop. Their usual unruly curls had both been tamed and were neatly combed and trimmed with care. Sirius was holding Regulus on his hip, but the boy looked completely calm and peaceful.

Come to think of it, Remus can't recall ever seeing Regulus in a short-sleeved shirt that wasn't 5 sizes too big on him and basically a dress. He always either wore one of Sirius’ shirts, long-sleeves, or most commonly, a hoodie.

Even in typical clothes, Sirius still looks absolutely breath-takingly stunning. And Regulus is a perfect blend of scowly and innocently baby-faced as he peers up with his owlish gray eyes and sips on his juice box with content.

“You both look dashing, my star boys.” Remus beams.

“Lily cut both of our hair fresh last night.” Sirius informs him. Sirius had told him that Regulus can’t get his hair cut by a hairdresser because he’s too squirmy and anxious, so Lily does both to help out. 

“You boys ready?” Remus asks.

“I am armed with juice boxes, sunblock, crayons, snacks, towels, and hoodies for all.” Sirius holds up his backpack like a shield.

“You ready bud?” Remus asks Regulus.

“Reggie’s aren’t known for being particularly adept to change, but this one is rocking with it pretty well today.” Sirius explains, tracing patterns on this nape of Regulus’ neck with his fingertips as the boy clings onto him tightly.

“I was promised chocolate cake.” Regulus admits.

“Don't worry, my mum made a huge cake and she's making it her mission that you get a slice. I warned her not to squish your cheeks too much, but she might try.” Remus promises. Sirius didn't have a car, but Remus did, so they decided that Remus would drive but that if Regulus wanted to leave early, there was a train close enough for them to take.

Remus has never driven with a child in the car, much less a posh one like Regulus, but he found himself with the same amount of nerves that a new father does on their first ride home from the hospital. Remus even went out of his way to research and buy the right car seat for Regulus that was both comfy and safe.

Sirius buckles Regulus in and closes the door, stopping to talk to Remus once they were out of ear-shot of the boy.

“Let me worry about him today. I don’t wanna burden you with my responsibility.” Sirius pleads.

“Sirius, you guys aren't a burden.” Remus reminds him.

“And people in public tend to assume that I'm his dad. We don’t usually correct people who call me his dad because it's easier than telling every single stranger that I had to adopt him because our parents beat the shit out of their kids. I don't outwardly tell people, but legally I am his adoptive father, he just likes calling me Siri better.” Sirius explains.

“Whatever you're comfortable with.” Remus promises, “I am so excited for you to meet my parents and sisters, they’re gonna love you.”

“And one last thing, I hate to say it but I have to. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I told James this too to be fair.” Sirius apologies fervently.

“Say whatever you need to say.” Remus assures.

“I don't make Regulus touch anyone he doesn't want to or do anything he doesn't want to. I can't stand when people try to pressure him into a hug when he says no or do it anyway without his consent like his voice doesn't matter.”

“I would bite anyone who tries to even high-five him without his consent.” Remus promises.

“I love you, wolf boy.” Sirius sings.

“I love you, star boy.” Remus smiles, leaning forward to kiss Sirius.

Remus thinks that the thirty-minute car ride went pretty well all things considered. Regulus stares out the window quietly, and Sirius sings along to every song on the radio at the top of his lungs, which is on-brand for them both honestly.

The moment Remus walks in the front door of his childhood home, he is mobbed by a parade of his parents, sisters, brother-in-laws, nieces, nephews, uncles, aunts, random family friends, neighbors, and every person his mom has ever met saying hello and kissing his cheeks.

Sirius puts Regulus on his hip and holds him close, knowing that Regulus hates crows and people are less likely to try and touch him or hold him suddenly when he's being held tight. Regulus has his head shyly tucked under Sirius’ chin as he clings tightly to his brother.

Remus’ older sisters, aunts, and relatives all swarm Sirius with questions about his tattoos, his hair, his relationship, and of course about the shy boy hiding his face in Sirius’ chest.

“Oh my beautiful baby.” Hope Lupin squeals, squishing Remus’ cheeks.

“Mum, this is Sirius and Regulus Black.” Remus introduces, ducking his mom.

“Hello.” Hope starts calmly but beaming, having been briefed extensively by Remus on what to do and what not to do to Regulus, “You must be Regulus, with those handsome blue eyes. And Sirius, with the most handsome smile.”

“Hello, Mrs. Lupin.” Sirius greets, going in for the hug.

“Call me Hope!”

“Reggie, will you say hi?” Sirius asks. Regulus gives a shy wave while his eyes track Hope’s every move as he gauges her and sizes her up for possible danger.

“Hello Regulus. You are even cuter than Remus described. Your freckles are absolutely adorable.” Hope coos, but knows better than to reach out.

Regulus gives a little smile, watching her intently.

“You boys follow me, I have something set up for you.” Hope says with a twinkle in her eyes. She leads the three past the crowd.

“Pay no mind to them, come upstairs.” Hope instructs.

“Remus told me that you feel most comfortable when you have a little bit of a private space to use as a home base, so I made sure that everyone knows not to come up here or come in Remus’ room. And this space is all yours to come to whenever you need, put your things done, lay down, take a break, or whatever you need.” Hope promises.

“Thank you, Mrs. Lupin. This is so beyond nice of you.” Sirius gushes.

“You can read in here a little if you want too, Regs.” Remus tells him, knowing that Sirius packed a book for him.

“This room is used to a lot of reading.” Hope smiles.

Sirius puts his bag down in the room, smiling as he gazes at the bedroom where his boyfriend grew up.

Remus notices that Regulus is tracking Hope’s every move with no distrust evident on his face.

“Regs, my mom made you some mac and cheese, and some of the Dino nuggets that you like and has them in the fridge for you. You're welcome to come in the fridge anytime, or tell someone and we’ll take you.” Remus tells him.

“Regulus, would you like a cookie? I have a few put aside just for you.” Hope offers.

Regulus nods hopefully, staring up at her. 

“Down, please.” Regulus asks politely, never without the manners that were instilled in him from infancy on. When Regulus is extremely anxious, he screams. When he’s super anxious, he in non-verbal. When he is only a manageable amount of anxious, he speaks in short phrases. But when he’s comfortable with someone, he’s a total chatterbox.

Sirius obliges and puts him on the ground.

“Can we go see the kitchen, please?” Regulus asks Hope with his tiny baby voice. 

“Certainly!” Hope exclaims, feeling nothing but proud when Regulus reaches up and grabs her hand.

Regulus looks at Sirius for approval, “Let's go!” Sirius sings. Regulus looks behind every few seconds to make sure Sirius is still two feet away, but he is content to let Hope lead him downstairs.

Sirius’ jaw drops as he trails behind them.

“I didn't think he'd leave my arms the whole day.” Sirius gapes.

“It's my mum, she's super good with kids.” Remus explains.

“Reggie was born to be a mama’s boy, but forced to be Siri’s.” Sirius chuckles. “He's totally drawn to mom figures who bake. He’s sort of like this with James’ mom too, but it took him a proper while to warm up to her.”

Sirius, in his part, is amazing with every single family member, random neighbor, and pestering question that flocks his wave. He entertains the people who bombard him with a captivating smile and a reassuring answer for everything.

Remus tries to shield him, but his older sisters insist on grilling him and his aunts insist on pinching his cheeks. Everyone, thankfully, coos at Regulus but don't reach out and touch him or place unreasonable demands on him. Regulus just clings to his brother and seems content to sit on his hip for hours.

“Is your name really Sirius?” Remus’ cousin grills his boyfriend.

“It seriously is.” Sirius answers with a wink and twinkle in his eye.

“You guys should let me take him for a weekend so you can go away. I'm sure you'd love the break.” Some well-meaning aunt offers and Sirius’ careful and perfect mask slips for a second as his eyes widen at the preposterous nature of the suggestion.

“Some people don't want a break from their kids because they didn't have nearly a dozen of them.” Remus’ mom steps in.

“All of mine flew the nest. I would love some company.” The aunt insists.

“I've grown quite fond of him, but thank you.” Sirius stutters, seeming eager to move the conversation away, bti soon getting pelted by more unreasonable questions, comments, and concerns.

After a while, Remus is able to suggest going into the pool just to drag Sirius away from the crowd who were debating over his eye color. The pool is something that Remus figured would be a huge and messy deal, but Sirius navigates it with such effortless grace that Remus is left, as usual, astounded.

Poor Regulus and his milky white skin are slathered in so much sunblock that he looks like a ghost, but Sirius says that it's better he looks like Casper than a lobster. Remus finds that his new favorite sight is the way that Sirius’ tattoos look when glistening with water and sunshine. For the first time ever, Remus sees the scars on Regulus’ back and legs that are always hidden by clothes and it makes his heart break a little.

Even if Regulus is petrified and hanging onto Sirius for dear life, Sirius still finds a way to make things fun as the three of them huddle by the least-crowded wall of the pool.

Sirius blows bubbles like a fish, spins around, makes dolphin noises, and doesn't stop trying to make Regulus smile. Regulus, in turn, is, for once, absolutely transfixed and has the most genuine smile on his face where a scowl usually resides. Remus has never heard Regulus laugh so much and so often. Sirius is doing everything in his power to keep the boy entertained and in good spirits.

Even Remus can't help but join in, “Is Sirius being silly?” Remus laughs, joining Sirius in poking the boy into giggles.

It's weird because Remus is surrounded by family. Literally, he's related to at least 20 other people in the pool that is in his childhood home, but he feels like he's with his family when he's with Sirius and Regulus. 

The three of them remain captivated in their own little world for as long as possible, until Regulus inevitably gets splashed and panics.

Tiny tears dribble down his freckled cheeks as Regulus struggles to take deep breaths.

“Dry those baby blues for me, would ya?” Sirius coos, wiping off Regulus’ face with his fingers as he walks to the stairs.

“Scared.” Regulus mumbles.

“Oh Regs. It's okay.” Sirius assures, holding his kid close, “Let's dry off and see about eating a little bit.”

Sirius sits down on the nearest pool chair, plopping Regulus in his lap and holding him close until the boy calms down, “Shit, I forgot the towels in your room.”

“I can go get them.” Remus offers.

“You know what, let me grab them because I want his cup and something for him to color on too. Can you watch him?” Sirius asks.

So Remus finds himself with Regulus curled up next to him, leaning into Remus for protection.

Remus’ mom hands Regulus an icey, which he gladly and immediately accepts.

“Help please.” Regulus tugs on Remus’ sleeve.

“Gladly.” Remus assures, rushing to open the ice-pop and feeling glad to feel needed.

Now that Sirius isn't around for just one brief minute, Remus’ relatives feel the need to swarm around the teary-eyed first-grader.

“Is he okay?” Remus’ sister coos.

“Overtired.” Remus mouths, a fond smile playing on his lips. He feels proud that people look to him for questions about Regulus, like he was some sort of expert in the subject.

Remus holds him until Sirius gets back and the three of them all color and play tic-tac-toe until it's time for them to get up and get food.

Regulus gets his dinner, his chocolate cake, and even roasts smores with Sirius when night falls. 

“Take the extra slice home and give it to mom.” One of Remus’ aunts tells Regulus, who just looks exasperated at the incompetence of the adults around him, but accepts the extra slice of cake without complaint.

The three sit on a log together around the firepit with Regulus sprawled across both of their laps, eyes fixated on the dancing firelight.

It isn't long before Regulus is nodding off to the firelight and Sirius is being pelted by question again.

“Do you like being a dad?” Remus’ sister asks.

“It's my favorite thing in the world. He’s healed parts of me that I didn’t even know were broken because they came that way.” Sirius admits easily and fondly.

Remus notices his mom smiling softly yet thoughtfully at them and suddenly feels self-conscious for some reason he can't quite put his finger on.

His thoughts are interrupted when Regulus begins to stir, seeming immediately disoriented and panicked by his surroundings as he clings into Sirius and buries his face in his shirt.

With a practiced ease, Sirius stands up and slides Regulus onto his hip. “He's still pretty much out, so I'm gonna go put him down in your bedroom and see if he’ll lie back down,” Sirius says, planting a quick kiss on the top of Remus’ head.

“I can do it!” Some random cousin offers and Remus doesn't miss the way that Sirius tightens his grip around his kid.

“Thank you, but he needs to be rocked back to sleep usually and prefers it when I do it.” Sirius replies easily, breezing away quickly.

After about ten minutes, Sirius reemerges and instantly goes back to the same log, plopping his head down on Remus’ lap.

“He down?” Remus asks, threading his fingers through his boyfriend's curls.

“One You Are My Sunshine and one Somewhere Over The Rainbow was all it took.” Sirius smirks, “He’ll probably be out for a while, don't worry about him, enjoy your time with your family he's fine.”

“You guys are my family too.” Remus promises.

“I love you so much, but more than that. I trust you so much. I never thought I would find someone who did anything more than tolerate the fact that I have a kid, but you, you make him feel safe and you make me feel that way too. I could see our nights going exactly like this for a long time.” Sirius declares.

“Is this you proposing?” Remus smirks.

“No, you'd know if I was. There would be rose petals and I would be down on one knee. Probably a blimp in the sky too.” Sirius smirks. “I'm serious about you, wolf boy.”

“I'm serious about you too.”

“No, I'm Sirius.” Sirius smirks.

“Jackass.” Remus rolls his eyes. “I would be privileged to do this with you for a long time.”

“As would I, darling.” Sirius melts.

The two lay together, chatting, singing, and enjoying themselves for another hour before Regulus rushes out of the house in a blur of tears and panic and launches at his brother.

“I woke up without you and I didn't know where I was and- and- I was scared.” Regulus sobs frantically.

“Oh baby, I'm so sorry that was my fault. I didn't think you'd wake up so I came back down to hang out, but I shouldn't have left you somewhere new alone.” Sirius frets.

“Scared.” Regulus pouts.

“I know, little star. Let's go calm down inside together.” Sirius suggests, trying to move his brother away from the staring eyes. 

“Stay with me.” Regulus insists.

“Of course.” Sirius promises before turning to Remus. We're probably gonna need to head out soon. Is it cool if I call James to get us now?”

“Nonsense, I'll go with you.” Remus promises, “Go settle him and let me know when you're ready.”

Sirius smiles gratefully before rushing off to tend to his son.

“Sirius left?” Hope asks, when Remus steps inside to help her clean the kitchen.

“No, he's upstairs with Regulus. Poor thing woke up and was frightened.”

“Yes dear, that's exactly what I'm worried about.” Hope frets. “He had to get up from spending time with you to go rush to his son, and that's the way it will always be.”

“Mum, I know that his son will always be his first priority. I'm okay with that.” Remus promises.

“Remus John, you're my baby. You will always be MY first priority, and you deserve to be with someone who makes you theirs. Sirius is lovely and charming, but you're so young my dear. You deserve to be your partner’s first priority.” Hope says softly, holding Remus’ hands.

“I don't need to be his first priority, I'm okay with being a priority. It's fine mom, really.” Remus brushes off, trying to rush out of this conversation and feeling all kinds of anxious desperation to leave.

“But it's not fair of someone to ask that of you. I was a single mom for years until I met your step-dad, and I didn't date again until I knew that you guys were old enough that I could prioritize the needs of someone else. He has a child with special needs-”

“He doesn't have special needs, he just has different needs.” Remus buts in.

“Regardless, that boy is lovely and so very darling, but don't you worry that there won't be enough love leftover for you at the end of the day?” Hope presses.

“There is.” Remus defends.

“What about when you need someone to be there for you at the same time that Regulus does? Sirius will always put his son above you, is that something you are willing to put up with for forever?” Hope asks.

“That's just something I deal with.” Remus explodes, “Why are you acting like I sought this out? It's just what happened. Of course I didn't mean to become a step-dad at twenty-five, but I'm here now so I can't exactly back on out because my mom thinks I deserve someone to put me first. It's fine that he doesn't put me first. I deal with it because I love him!”

A small whimper from the upstairs makes Remus keenly alert to the audience that he didn't know had gathered up on the stairs.

Sirius and Regulus both had blue-gray eyes. Their eyes reminded Remus of the snow, the sea, and the flowers on the way to his job. That blue-gray color was his favorite thing. The warmth behind those eyes could melt even the strongest ice from anyone’s hearts. But not Sirius’ eyes were just an icy cold steel gray with no warmth whatsoever as they glared at Remus.

Regulus, the source of the whimper, was hiding his face in Sirius’ neck like he was afraid of something, and it took a second of adjustment to realize that it was Remus’ shouting that he was afraid of.

“Oh do go on, don't stop on my account. Tell me more about how you deal. How hard this has been for you. Tell me more.” Sirius hisses out.

“Fuck me.” Remus mutters.

“Won't be doing that anymore.” Sirius smirks sardonically, descending the staircase with his bag slung behind his shoulders.

“Let's just ta-”

“We’re going to leave and take a train back to my apartment. Don't follow me, lose my number, and I never want to hear from you again. I'll send James to get the copy of my house key that you have and drop off any personal effects you may have left behind at my apartment.” Sirius says in a business-like tone.

“Si-”

“I've been through more in my life than you could ever even possibly imagine. I've crawled my way back from the depths of hell. I'll be quite alright, but there's a six-year-old boy who heard every word you said about him and will never forget it. A boy who's been burned, drowned, and beaten by his parents for crying as an infant, will never forget how you made him feel. Have a nice life.” Sirius growls, stalking off and slamming the door.

Chapter Text

When Remus Lupin was little, he was afraid of the dark in a perfectly normal little-kid way. But his mom would always remind him that the sun would always set at the end of the day, and then the stars and the moon would come out to play. For the past twenty-five years of his life, it would be a constant that the stars would come out at night, even if he couldn't see them because of the clouds and the light pollution, he always knew they were there.

Now he knew the stars were gone.

Stars were everything he knew. Sirius cooked pasta shaped like stars. Sirius used to trace constellations on his back when he couldn't sleep. He used to look out the window with Sirius and Regulus and listen to the two point out all the constellations and their meanings. Everything in his life was stars and he used to bask in their soft glow. Now they were dim and everything was cold.

The stars were gone.

Remus had unintentionally gone his entire relationship without drinking ever since he learned why Sirius didn't. The first time he had a beer was the night that Sirius broke up with him and boy was it strong. After throwing his three months of accidental sobriety out the window, it spiraled from there.

The stars were gone.

Life was dull without the stars shining brightly upon him and things didn't feel as certain. Remus has slept with a night-light ever since the break up. He didn't sleep much, hyper-fixating at night on what he could have done better. What he could have said instead. He wrote letters and crumpled them. He wrote texts and deleted them. 

The stars were gone.

It had been one month since the break-up, and Remus was aware that he had only known them for three short months out of the quarter of a century that he has been alive, but it feels like everything is duller. James came over and held out his palm for Sirius’ keys back with a scowl on his face. Remus’ hands shook profusely while he tried to get the key off the ring, so much so that it took him three tries to actually get it off.

The stars were gone.

Work felt dull knowing that he was going home alone instead of going home to movie night with his two favorite people.

The stars were gone.

Regulus wasn't a huge coloring fan, but the drawing he made Remus of him, Sirius, and Remus was hung up on Remus’ fridge. It was all he had left. 

The stars were gone.

When Remus Lupin was little, he was afraid of the dark in a perfectly normal little-kid way. But his mom would always remind him that the sun would always set at the end of the day, and then the stars and the moon would come out to play. For the past twenty-five years of his life, it would be a constant that the stars would come out at night, even if he couldn't see them because of the clouds and the light pollution, he always knew they were there. Now the stars are gone.

Remus was at work, leaned over the counter of the nurse’s station in the ambulance bay and poured over the labs that had just come in on his tablet. Things weren't adding up with these labs. Something was missing. He was tempted to say the stars, but he figures that side-effects of his patients medication was probably the reason for such rapid dehydration. But that didn't explain everything. He was contemplating possible allergens that could explain the bizarre list of symptoms he was seeing when a scream sent a chill down his spine and left goosebumps trickling along his forearm.

He knew that scream. He had heard it before when the power went out, when it was too hot, when the tag of a shirt collar was touching his neck, when he got water on his face during a shower, when it stormed suddenly, when the night terrors creeped up on him, and countless other times. He knew that scream in his bones. But this scream was unlike any other he’d heard before. It was louder and much more shrill. Sounding like true fear and sorrow rolled into one.

Regulus.

Remus was bolting towards the source of the scream before his brain had even processed who it was coming from.

Regulus. Regulus. Regulus.

Remus has been in the emergency room thousands of times before for thousands and thousands of hours. He's seen more patients come in on a gurney than he has seen walking out of the emergency bay. It was nothing new to him. Patients were just numbers, labels, and symptoms. But these two, they weren't just numbers, labels, and symptoms. They were his stars.

He watched several nurses try to pull a kicking, thrashing, red-faced, and border-line feral Regulus away from his brother as the triage and trauma units tried to get at Sirius on the stretcher. He saw Sirius’s boots poking out from the end of the stretcher, but his body was covered by Regulus and all of the doctors.

“Regulus!” Remus shouts over the fray, throwing his hands in the mix and pulling for Regulus.

“Regulus?” One of the nurses, Amelia’s jaw drops, knowing that name quite well.

“Amelia, Amelia, let me.” Remus commands frantically, the rest of the team lets Remus pull Regulus away and Regulus goes without a fight. Remus gets a good peak at the six-year-old and feels his stomach twist with grief. Sirius was so careful about making sure that Regulus was always clean and presentable. His hair was always combed and conditioned, his tears wiped, his clothes ironed, and he was always clean, even if Sirius had to battle him to bathe every night. Remus stares at the little boy that he watched Sirius dote over constantly. He's dirty, there's a gash on his cheek, a red mark that looks so much like a handprint that Remus’ stomach churns on his neck, his hair is a tangled nest and soaked in crimson liquid. 

“Regulus! Regulus buddy, it's Remus. Come here. I have you.” Remus pulls him into his arms. Regulus goes limp immediately and stops thrashing, but continues to sob so hard both of them shake. Remus clutches the boy close in his arms and gets a good look at Sirius for the first time. 

Blood. There's so much blood everywhere. Snot and tears stain the pure white of Remus’ lab coat but he doesn't notice. Remus’ team, the same team that he does this same routine with every day, are taking care of an unconscious Sirius and triaging his injuries. Blood cakes his hair and runs in rivulettes down the side of his face.

“Sirius.” Remus gapes in horror at his unconscious, former, lover. 

“What happened?” Remus says, struggling to breathe .

“Domestic violence, there was some dispute between these two and their parents.” Amelia fills him in.

“What are Sirius’ injuries?” Remus stutters.

“We don't know the extent of them but he has a head wound and a stab wound that are concerning the doctors the most. Regulus wouldn't let EMTs check him out, but his right arm seems to be limp and they noted a possible distal fracture.” Amelia tells him sadly.

“Call OR 2 and page CT.” one of the doctors shouts and Remus zones out.

“Remus, we need you to move.” Amelia prompts, firmly, giving Remus a push out of the way.

Remus takes a stutter step to the left and notes that the team is wheeling Sirius’s stretcher down the hall and another nurse is trying to talk to him.

“What?” Remus asks, hearing only ringing in his ears.

“Let's get him to the open bed in treatment room 9 in the peds unit.” The nurse repeats.

By now, Regulus has become rather tired, gripping not Remus’ jacket like he was a lifeline as small residual sobs made his chest bounce very few seconds. 

Remus’ supervisor, Doctor McGonagall, makes her way over and gives a sympathetic click of her tongue.

“Amelia tells me this is Regulus and she has Sirius.” McGonagall states, rather factually.

“Yes.” Remus confirms, bringing a hand up to rub at Regulus’ back.

“Right now, what they both need from you is to be there for them. Come along now, I will check Regulus out myself.” McGonagall prompts.

“He has CPTSD and a severe anxiety disorder, he doesn't do well with having anyone unfamiliar touch him. It needs to be me.” Remus advocates.

“Well due to the nature of your relationship, you can't be the sole doctor responsible for examining him, but I would welcome your help as an advocate for Regulus.” Mcgonagall promises.

When Remus tries to put the little Black brother down on the hospital bed, he shrieks, a broken croaky sound, before clinging even tighter to Remus.

“Regulus, I'm going to sit down with you in my lap on the bed, okay. Then me and my friend are going to see if you are hurt anywhere.” Remus narrates.

“Hurt.” Regulus repeats slowly.

“Yeah, hurt, sweet boy. Are you hurt anywhere?” Remus asks, careful to not overwhelm Regulus.

“Hurt.” Regulus repeats again, looking up at Remus slowly.

“Okay, I'll fix it.” Remus promises instantly. Setting on the edge of the bed and gathering a rather compliant Regulus to sit on his lap.

McGonagall and a nurse take Regulus’ vitals while he sits in Remus’ lap, seemingly okay with the process.

“He needs a full body check if he can't tell us what hurts.” McGonagall reminds Remus.

“He will, he just needs some time. His brain gets like jello when he's hurt.” Remus echoes Sirius' words, “Let me try.”

Remus gently and carefully runs his fingers through Regulus’ hair, while checking for any bumps. He narrates what he's doing as he gently moves Regulus’ ankles, knees, wrists, and feels for any injuries. Remus has to steel himself when he sees bruising forming on Regulus’ wrist, looking like someone has grabbed and yanked it.

“Ow.” Regulus tenses when Remus touches his right arm.

“Does your arm hurt?” Remus asks.

“Yes, ow.” Regulus repeats, scrunching up his face in discomfort. Remus pokes and prods for a few minutes before asking the nurse to call for an x-ray tech.

“Get Molly if she's on-call.” Remus requests.

“Does anything else feel ow?” Remus asks.

Regulus is silent for a minute while he processes the question before pointing to his neck.

“Okay, I'm gonna check it out and then put some ice on it.” Remus narrates. He listens to Regulus’ breathing sounds and checks his airway.

“Can you get me an ice pack with a nice soft bed blanket wrapped around it?” Remus asks.

“Certainly.” Mcgonagall promises, the head doctor of the unit.

She comes back a minute later with an ice pack wrapped up by a bed blanket. “Here you go, Mr. Regulus.”

Regulus turns around and buries his head in Remus’ shirt while Remus ices his neck.

“His cheek will need two stitches.” Mcgonagall whispers sadly.

“Let me talk him into it.” Remus sighs, cradling Regulus a little closer.

“Sweetheart, the cut on your cheek needs to be cleaned up and then we need a bandage.” Remus informs him, carefully carding his hands through Regulus’ tangled curls.

“Is it gonna hurt?” Regulus whimpers.

“It's going to sting for a little bit, but I'm gonna be right here. Okay?” Remus promises.

“Please don't let them hurt me, Remus.” Regulus pleads.

“I would never let anyone hurt you. Cleaning it up will sting a little bit, but we are only doing it to help you. Do you want me to clean it? Or my friend to clean it?” Remus offers.

“You.” Regulus whines anxiously, clinging on tighter.

Regulus squirms a little bit as Remus cleans and preps the area.

“Alright bud, I'm going to need you to sit on your own for this part. I can do the stitches if you're under me. I am going to be super quick and as gentle as I can be. After you're done, you can sit on my lap again and I'll help you get changed into comfy clothes.” Remus promises.

“I want to stay with you.” Regulus sniffles.

“I'm not leaving you, not for a second. If you just sit up in bed right here and lean against the pillows, I'm gonna pull this chair up and be super quick.” Remus assures.

Even though Remus preps the area with lidocaine and goes as slowly and gently as possible, Regulus still flinches and tears trickle down his face.

“Ow it hurts.” Regulus squirms and twists.

“I’m sorry buddy, I know. It’s going to be done super soon.” Remus swears, unable to help any further.

“Ow! It hurts. Stop hurting me. I’m sorry I’m sorry. Please stop.” Regulus begs, twisting and kicking even more.

“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” Remus repeats, hands shaky and eyes blurry. “Almost done.”

“I want Sirius, please.” Regulus pleads.  

“Somewhere over the rainbow. Way up high.” Remus tests out, singing gingerly. Regulus freezes and looks up with wide doe eyes. Remus knows he’s not a good singer, not like Sirius, but something about the lullaby draws him in just the same. 

“Why oh why can’t I?” Remus finishes, softly humming as he pulls off his gloves. 

“All done.” Remus swears, holding out his hands and letting Regulus choose whether he wants to be picked up again or not.

“All done?” Regulus asks wearily.

“All done.” Remus confirms. 

Regulus slumps against his chest and Remus settles back on the bed. He watches his boss gaze at him with fond eyes. 

“You're brilliant with him.” She observes after Regulus has buried his face in Remus’ scrubs. 

“He's brilliant. I’m just lucky.” Remus smiles softly. 

When the x-ray tech comes, Remus convinces Molly to let Regulus do this from his arms. It takes some swaying, but in the end she agrees and even puts a rush on his results for Remus. 

Two nurses come and help Remus gingerly sponge bathe the blood off of Regulus as best as they can. They cast and sling Regulus’ arm for him and administer some Tylenol for the pain. It doesn't take long before Mcgonagall throws a blanket over the pair and Regulus’ exhaustion takes him over. 

“Can someone go to the daycare and ask for any extra sweats they have for him? I want him out of these dirty ones and he would hate a gown?” Remus asks.

“Of course. I’ll have someone come up with them.” She makes the exception instantly. “But Remus, I cannot release the boy into your custody. Especially knowing that you and his father have broken up. Someone else needs to come for him.”

“Sirius isn’t leaving tonight is he?” Remus whispers.

Mcgonagall shakes her head sadly. 

“I’ll call the people Sirius has written down in his will and care plan for Regulus.” He promises.

Remus calls James Potter thrice with no answer.

He calls Lily Potter twice with no answer.

He calls James Potter another four times before remembering that he had Peter’s contact.

Peter answers instantly.

“Peter! Peter, oh Merlin! Something bad's happened with Reg and Sirius.” Remus spills.

Remus hears nothing but sniffling.

“Are they okay?” Peter croaks.

“Sirius is in surgery but I have Regulus right here sleeping on my chest in the hospital.” Remus informs.

“Make sure you rub his back and have someone get his lion for him from the house.” Peter cuts himself off with a shuddering breath, “Make sure someone reads to him every night but also does silly things with him like play games to keep him from getting too serious.”

“Of course, we will do that. Can you bring his lion up?” Remus asks.

“I'm not coming up.” Peter declares, voice tiny.

“Why not, it's a mess here. They are both very hurt and need you!” Remus booms.

He hears a choked sob and a winge on the other end, “Goodby Remus, take care of them for me.” Peter rushes before hanging up.

“Fuck.” Remus breathes softly, tears glittering in his brown eyes. He holds a sleeping Regulus to his chest for an hour, dozing himself before James Potter storms in.

Remus had always known James as the sunshine-eque, cheery, funny guy who was never really quite serious, but now he stormed in with a fierce anger and loyalty in his eyes.

“Give him to me.” James demands.

“James, I-”

“Give him.” James barks, moving to pull Regulus out of Remus’ hold. He doesn't look calm until he confirms that he has the boy unharmed.

“Where is Sirius?” he demands.

“In surgery.” Remus gulps.

“Merlin.” James deflates, covering the back Regulus’ head with his hands like he was feeling for bumps.

“James, what happened?” Remus asks.

“Peter happened.” James sneers.

“Peter, I just spoke to him. What did Peter do?” Remus questions.

“WHAT! What did you tell him?” James demands.

“Nothing, I just said that Regulus and Sirius were in the hospital and asked him to come up. He told me to take care of them and cried before hanging up.” Remus reports.

“Peter told Sirius’ family about Sirius’ address and gave them the pad code to get in.” James scowls.

From what Remus learns in the coming days, Sirius’ parents were rich and influential members of society that had lots of control and access to some very corrupt and scary people. Whatever they offered Peter, was worth turning on his friends and inviting the Black family inside his apartment. His parents, cousins, aunts, and uncles all barged in and demanded that Regulus come home with them and used force when neither would comply. They had planned to take Regulus back to France where it would be much harder for Sirius to get him back once he was out of the county. 

They might have succeeded if James had not been home and heard the commotion. 

James takes Regulus home that very night and it takes four days before Remus hears from him again. In that time, he obsessively spends every waking second that he can at the nurses’ station outside Sirius’ ICU room. He pretends to shuffle paperwork, staple, copy, and scribble on a pad while watching Sirius from afar. In those four days, Remus has yet to see grey eyes ever open.

On the fourth day, he gets a call from none other than James Potter himself when he had finally stopped back at his own apartment to nap and grab some clothes.

“Sirius is awake.” James starts bluntly.

“Holy crap.” Remus bursts with excitement.

“Can you meet me at the hospital in twenty minutes? The hospital called me and said that Sirius woke up and freaked out demanding to see Regulus. I want someone to be there to take Regulus in case things go south. I called five other people and Lily was in the city at a conference all day, so it was either you or a random nurse.” James explains. 

“I will be there in 15 minutes.” Remus promises, throwing on two different shoes and bolting out the front door. 

Remus’ first thought when he sees James holding Regulus on his hip is that neither of them have slept at all over the past four days, and it's probably true. They both look god awful. Hair unbrushed. Clothes wrinkled. Bags under eyes. Sirius would have never stood for this.

“Hiya Reg.” Remus smiles, waving.

“Sirius.” Regulus says, rather petulantly, learning his head against James’ shoulder.

“We're going to see him.” James sighs.

“Sirius.” Regulus repeats, stubbornly, looking disgruntled and dysregulated.

“You can only imagine how these past few days have gone. I had to take out of work and pull him out of school. I don't think I've slept longer than 45 minutes and I have Cheerios in my hair.” James sighs again, looking frantic as Regulus’ bottom lip trembles. “No, don't cry again Reggie. Shhh, shhh, shhhh.”

“I want Sirius.” Regulus whimpers.

“I know kiddo.” Remus frowns, rubbing a soothing hand over his back, “Let's go see him.”

“He's not going to feel good, Regs. He might need a little space. It's like when he's having a sad day.” James explains.

“Sssssttttttooopppp.” Regulus whines, kicking James’s side and not wanting to hear a word of it.

Even though Remus was a doctor and was privy to years of actual medical experience to contradict this, half of him fully anticipated that Sirius would be sitting up in his hospital bed and smiling. But somehow, Sirius was anyway.

Sirius looked like hell. His hair was tied back in a loose ponytail, but it was still knotted and matted. He had a busted lip, bandages wrapped around his head, stitches on his cheek just like Regulus, his eyes are red with a burst blood vessel, a bruised eye, bruises on his face and neck, a cast on his arm to match Regulus, and he looked like he had gotten just as much rest as Regulus and James had.

Some nurse had artfully covered everything below his chest with a blanket and propped him up so that he looked sort of normal for Regulus, and even with the fake smile plastered onto his face, Remus could see the immense pain radiating off of his face in waves.

“Hi, my baby.” Sirius rasps, reaching out his uncasted hand to reach his hand out for his brother.

“Regs, it's Sirius. You've been crying for him for days.” James smiles, moving to hand Regulus over. Remus had expected Regulus to flingout of James’ arms and barrel into Sirius just like he had done the first time Remus had ever met him, but he remains stock still and stares at Sirius with a frozen expression.

“Regulus.” Sirius smiles again, but even he can't hide the wince that moving his body even an inch punches out of him.

Regulus hides his face in James’ shoulder and won't look at his brother.

“Hi baby, it's me. It's Siri. I know I'm not looking as glam as usual, but it's me. Don't be scared, it's Siri. Please baby, come here.” Sirius pleads, face contorting with agony, every move setting his body on fire, but ignoring the pain completely in favor of continuing to reach out for Regulus.

“Remus, can you take him in the hall for a bit-”

“Just give him a minute!” Sirius snaps, “Just give me a minute. Just be patient, Merlin!”

“Okay, okay.” James holds a hand up in surrender.

It takes a painful minute, but when Sirius is able to sit up a little more, with Remus, who Sirius had not even acknowledged, helping him forward, he is able to reach out just enough to let his thumb rub back and forth on the back of Regulus’ hand as he mutters sweet things in French.

“It's me, Siri.” Sirius repeats again. “Your big brother. I've been with you every single day of your life. I know I look different, but it’s okay. We're okay. It’s me, sweet boy. The same Siri who rubs your back when you can’t sleep and helps you fix your socks when you don’t like the seam touching your foot. It’s me, Reg, please.” 

Regulus lifts his head up and peers at Sirius carefully for a few seconds before letting out a pained squeal and clambering out of James’ arms. 

“Reg, Reg, careful. He has a big boo-boo on his belly from where the doctors fixed him up.” James calls as Regulus scrambles to tuck his head in Sirius’ chest. Sirius deflates immediately, slumping back into his pillows and having to close his eyes because his vision is swimming with pain at the sudden weight on his injured body but he would sooner fight off every doctor in here with his one good hand then have Regulus move.

“Just give me a minute to hold my boy.” Sirius breathes, wrapping his arms tight around his kid, kissing his curls. 

“My sweet boy.” Sirius continues, gently running his one hand through the six-year-old’s curls. “What has James been doing to you? You're a mess.”

“Hurts.” Regulus frowns, pointing at the cast on his arm.

Sirius' face is horrified at the injury for a brief second, but he quickly snaps back, “Oh baby, it's okay. It's just a boo-boo. I'll help you take care of it and I can draw all of the stars on your cast.”

“You make everything better.” Regulus sighs with a yawn, burying his face in the crook of Sirius’ neck.

“You make everything better.” Sirius repeats, placing another kiss on top of his child’s head.

“I bet you didn't get much sleep these past few days, huh? Rest your eyes, my love.” Sirius whispers, unconsciousness pulling at the edge of his own mind, eyes fluttering with effort to stay open.

“I love you dad.” Regulus whispers before falling asleep.

“Dad.” Sirius repeats with a weary smile, in awe, before sleep claims him too.

After tearing himself away from the hospital room that day, Remus does not hear from Sirius until it is time for Sirius to leave the hospital, a whole week later. It has been slowly strangling Remus that Sirius and Regulus were both so close, in the place where he worked and hurting so much, but he couldn't help, so when his phone lights up with a call from Sirius he actually drops his coffee in excitement while leaning against the nurses’ station.

“Can you come to my hospital room?” Sirius asks.

“I'll be there in just a second.” Remus promises, the line going dead a few moments later.

“What's the matter?” Remus bursts in, frantically.

Regulus was sitting calmly, cuddling up to Sirius and coloring in his coloring book while humming while Sirius’ eyes track the television show that's on with attention.

McGonagall had made a concession to allow Regulus to stay with Sirius after the first night Sirius woke up when they had tried to yank the six-year-old away to go home with James and he had screamed and cried until he was purple in the face with fear and lack of oxygen.

“Nothings wrong.” Sirius scoffs. “I need to talk to you about something.”

“Anything.” Remus rushes, not even caring how desperate he must have been looking right about now.

“The doctors are ready to release me, but they won't do so unless I can provide an address. I can't go back to my old apartment for obvious reasons. James has only one bedroom in his and social services says they won't sign off on letting Regulus live in an apartment unless he has a separate bedroom, even if he shares it with me. The market is shit right now and I can't find something on such short notice while waiting to officially break my other lease. I called like five other people, but you're the only person I know with a guest bedroom in their apartment that would still be in the same school district. Also, you owe me one, Remus.” Sirius says, quite matter-of-factly.

“You want to move in with me?” Remus gapes.

“Out of necessity, in a very temporary sense, to appease social services, yes.” Sirius admits.

Remus trips over himself with delight to say yes, “Absolutely. I can clear out my bedroom and move into the guest bedroom if you want since it's bigger. The shower is also bigger, so you'll be able to get in and out easier with the big cast on your leg. I can go with James today to take whatever you need out of your old place so that you don't have to go back, and I'll make some pastina for dinner-”

“Remus, I just need your guest bedroom.” Sirius sighs, fingers moving to card through Regulus’ curls as the six-year-old colors with blissful ignorance.

“Yes, yes, absolutely. When do you go home?” Remus beams.

“Right now.” Sirius says.

“I'll call off my shift right now and drive you guys home.” Remus decides.

“To your place, not home.” Sirius corrects, dryly. Then, his expression softens and brightens simultaneously as he looks at the child snuggled up to his side.

“Reggie, we’re going to sleep at Remus’ place tonight. For a couple days while we get sorted. How's that sound, yeah?” Sirius asks, stroking Regulus’ cheek with gentle fingers.

“Ooo, he has the couch that reclines. Can we have a sleepover in the living room and finish watching A Series of Unfortunate Events, like we used to do?” Regulus begs, referring to the sleepovers they used to have when the Black Brothers would sleep over at Remus’ place and Srius would turn the living room into a pillow fort while they had a movie marathon. Regulus did not want to sleep apart from Sirius in a place so unfamiliar, and Sirius did not want his kid to sleep in bed with Remus and Sirius, so he had invented the great living room sleepover trick for nights when they slept at Remus’. But that was before , and it makes Remus’ stomach turn to think about how badly he wants that to happen.

“Baby, our life is A Series of Unfortunate Events.” Sirius snorts.

“We can watch Phineas and Ferb then.” Regulus decides.

“Let's talk about this later.” Sirius pushes off.

“No, let's talk about it now. Are we going to have a big living room sleepover with Remus like we used to?” Regulus presses.

“No baby, not tonight. James is going to bring over a couple bags of clothes from our apartment to sleep at Remus’, so we’re going to need to take time to set it up.” Sirius decides.

“What if he forgets some of the things that I need?” Regulus frets.

“I texted James a very long list of things. He's going to bring you clothes, pajamas, socks, undergarments, and a lot of my hoodies for you to steal.” Sirius teases, poking his brothers’ sides, as he currently wears a non-consensually borrowed sweatshirt for Sirius’. “Your hairbrush, toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo, med case, blanket, pillow, lion, some of your favorite books, your blocks, your picture book, your tablet, your trainers, your school bag, your art kit, your toy dinosaurs, your star projector, and some of your favorite snacks, juice, and food to tide us over until we can grocery shop on our own. Alright sweet love, and anything we forget James can run back and grab for us or we can take a trip to the shops to look for.”

“Can't we just go back and get it?” Regulus asks.

“Not right now.” Sirius shakes his head sadly, “Come on little one, let's come get ready to check out.”

Remus can't find it in himself to be anything but excited as he feels like he's being given a second chance to show just how sorry he is and make it up to the both of them by taking care of them. And so began step one of his master plan to get Sirius back.

Chapter Text

Remus had never imagined that the addition of just two humans into his modest and plant themed two-bedroom apartment could be so deafeningly and overwhelmingly loud. He had anticipated that they could be messy, emotional, and needy, but not noisy. This was not just a random man and first-grader off of the streets, these were two of the people in the world who knew him best, but the noise. The noise!

It seemed that, since the past two weeks of arriving home from the hospital and into a brand new small confined space that was not either Black brother’s home environment, all the two could do was bicker and trigger each other. Both had come home from the hospital with casts and physical limitations. Regulus had gotten his stitches out, but he was still very conscious and bothered by the scar left behind and still only had the use of his one un-casted arm. Being six-years-old and only having the use of one arm is frustrating on its own, but if you add in the fact that his guardian was also injured and unable to help him, it was a new level of frustration for both brothers. Sirius had a cast up past his knee on his left leg, a cast and a sling on his right arm, a huge surgical wound with stitches down his abdomen that Remus helped him clean once a day, and a body covered in tender and healing bruises.

The arrangement between the two brothers had always been that if Regulus cried, Sirius would pick him up, but now Sirius could not lift, carry, or even hold his brother because of his casts and stitches. So when a traumatized and frustrated six-year-old just wanted to be picked up and held close, Sirius was left unable too, frustrating them both. The only way that Sirius could hold him is if Sirius was laying down on his back and Regulus curled against his side, being careful of both of their casts. Because of the wound from his surgery, caused by a stabbing that Regulus witnessed, Sirius could not even hold Regulus against his chest like Regulus was used to sleeping without immense pain. When Regulus got anxious, which was almost always since being dumped in a new environment with no clear routine after witnessing such a huge traumatic event, he would scream and beg to be held, and Sirius would get frustrated and cry because he couldn't simply lean down and pick up his kid.

Then, there were the frustrated tears and shouts from both brothers because of this new environment. The novelty of being somewhere new and exciting wore off in exactly an hour and Remus could not blame Regulus. The old apartment was the first place that both brothers had ever felt safe. Now, Regulus cried because the handle on the bathtub was a knob instead of a lever and because Remus’ rubbish bin was in a cabinet instead of a free-standing pail. He cried when he wanted a book or a shirt and it was at his old apartment that he didn't really understand why he was banned from, but James could go in once a week and bring things back. He cried when he found out that Remus’ fridge’s motor made a noise all night long, but his hearer did not. He cried when he fell asleep on the couch and woke up, never knowing where he was. And Sirius was just as frustrated having to ask his ex-boyfriend where the spoons and hand-towels were kept.

Sirius was also livid that he had to rely on Remus for so much. Remus cleaned his wounds, bandaged them back up again, cut his food, and even stupid things like tying back his hair. At first, Sirius stubbornly tried to circumvent asking Remus for anything by asking Regulus to do it. Until Regulus burst into tears when Sirius was getting frustrated with guiding Regulus through brushing Sirius’ hair back and told his older brother that his arm was broken too. Sirius just pulled Regulus awkwardly into his side and kissed his head with a guilt-ridden soft smile and promised not to put too much pressure on his brother again.

When Remus helped Sirius with something, Sirius never looked at him- eyes always down cast to the ground. Sirius barely spoke a word to Remus at all, he barely spoke to anyone, but Remus more than usual.

None of the three slept much. Regulus and Sirius both woke up constantly in the middle of the night in a cold sweat. At least once a night, Regulus would bolt from the bedroom before Sirius could catch him, and Remus would help wrangle him back into bed because Sirius could not.

Sirius has taken an official leave of absence from work while he recovered. Regulus was taking time off school too, and James brought him school work from his teacher to do as often as he could. James and Lily stopped by at least once a day and James tried to split his time between helping Sirius with everything he was too proud to ask Remus to do and playing with Regulus. While Lily just made an effort to mother Regulus and hold him as best as she could.

Sirius’ personality had vanished. Gone was the goofy, brave, confident, energetic, and loving father that Remus had loved. Sirius mostly stared into space and laid in bed. He was easily frustrated and shut down in mere seconds. The light behind his eyes had extinguished. He had no energy or will to do much of anything, which was another source of contention between himself and his son, and that was what the two were currently fighting about.

Regulus was a cuddly and affectionate six-year-old who was unusually content to just cuddle and watch movies or read a book quietly, but he was still a six-year-old. In comparison to Sirius’ usual self, who used to be a never-ending source of fun ideas and energy, Regulus was quiet but he was still a child who wanted to play and needed to get his energy out. Especially now, after being cooped up for so long, Regulus was squirmy and restless, not wanting to sit still for too long and craving the constant movement and excitement that his brother used to bring. Regulus desperately wanted to play with Sirius and was used to doing so many fun things every day with him. The poor boy had been cooped up in Remus’ apartment for four-days straight now, cooped up in the hospital before that, and James’ apartment before that. However, all Sirius wanted to do was “watch” a movie or lay down.

“Come on Regulus, just come lay with me and we’ll watch any movie you want.” Sirius begs, patting the space on the couch next to him.

“No, we watched movies all day yesterday. I want to play with my new Legos with you.” Regulus whines, plopping on the ground and stubbornly crossing his arms.

“I can't get on the floor with you.” Sirius counters.

“Then we’ll play on the couch. I'm tired of watching movies!” Regulus argues.

“Reg, baby, I'm tired. My head hurts. I'm having a sad day. Can you just lay down with me and be my cuddly teddy bear?” Sirius sighs, trying to keep it together.

“No! I want to play with you.” Regulus whines, rubbing his eyes as tears sprang from them.

“Reg, I can't right now. I can read a book to you.” Sirius tries, looking panicked as he attempts to gather up his crutches and cross the eight feet between the two, that may as well have been an ocean.

“Why don't you want to do anything with me? What did I do wrong?” Regulus sobs.

“You didn’t do anything wrong, you’re perfect. Here, let’s come play Minecraft on my phone.” Sirius bribes.

“NO! I don’t want to.” Regulus wails.

“Sweetheart, come here let me hug you.” Sirius tries, frustrated with not being able to efficiently get to his feet and off the couch fast enough.

“No! I want you to pick me up.” Regulus sobs.

“Come here baby, l can't pick you up. But you can come cuddle into my side.” Sirius struggles, looking like he was being strangled by guilt.

“NO! I want you to hold me.” Regulus sobs, pulling his knees to his chest and crying into them.

Remus, who had been watching from the sidelines, carefully, steps in. Wanting to be careful not to step on Sirius’ toes, but also knowing that Regulus and Sirius both needed someone to step in.

Regulus flings his arms up and Remus picks him up instantly, letting the child bury his face in Remus’ shoulder and cry. Remus had grown rather accustomed and fond of having a child as a roommate.

“Shhh, shhh, you're okay little guy.” Remus coos, gently scratching Regulus’ back with both hands.

Remus turns to look at Sirius and sees Sirius’ face glowing with anger and jealousy at the simple fact that Remus was better equipped to take care of his kid then he was right now.

“Come here bud, let's give Sirius a hug, he needs it.” Remus decides, carrying Regulus over to the couch and gently passing Regulus to Sirius’ good side.

“My sweet baby, I'm so sorry.” Sirius gushes, tears welling up in his eyes as he takes Regulus under his good arm, “I promise when I'm better I'll play with you all you want.”

“I wanna go home!” Regulus sobs, burying his face in Sirius’ lap. With his one good hand, Sirius gently massaged Regulus’ curls, meaning he had nothing to cover his face with, so he just openly cried with snot trickling from his nose and Remus had never found him to be more radiant ever.

Careful not to infringe on Sirius’ autonomy and over step without consent, Remus tiptoed to get a tissue and came back with a couple, opting to leave them next to Sirius instead of just wiping his nose for him like he wanted to. Remus aches all over with the urge to pull both boys into his arms and wipe their tears until they feel better.

“I know you do, sweet boy.” Sirius says carefully, not promising to ever go back or saying that he does too.

“When do we go home and your boo boos get better?” Regulus demands, lifting his head up and having flashes of anger in his big grey eyes.

“We are home as long as we are together.” Sirius skirts around the question.

“Not a good answer!” Regulus yells, frustrated and tired, “When do we go back to 934 Hogwarts street and into apartment twelve?”

“We’re not. Me and you are going to find a new place to live together, just the two of us, this month.” Sirius informs him. Even though he knows it's only temporary, Remus’ heart clenches when he hears that Sirius plans on moving out soon.

“I don't want to.” Regulus whimpers, burying his head again, “It's not fair. I want to go back home.”

“I know my little star, it's not fair.” Sirius agrees, stroking Regulus’ curls.

Eventually, after a few minutes, Regulus settles down and pops his head back up.

“Can we play now?” Regulus asks, bottom lip protruding out in a helpless whine.

“My head hurts, little lion. I just want to lay down.” Sirius admits.

“Hey bud, how about I play with your new Legos with you while we let Siri take a nap?” Remus proposes, leaning down to ruffle Regulus’ curls.

“Can we open my new set?” Regulus asks, head tilted and looking right at Remus.

“Of course, kiddo.” Remus smiles.

Sirius looks conflicted for a few moments before giving in, “Okay, I'll go and nap while you explore all these new toys that James got you with Remus, huh?”

“I like the plan.” Regulus nods, seeming soothed, for now.

“Then, at five o’clock, when the small hand gets to 5, James is going to pick me up for my doctor's appointment.” Sirius prepares his brother carefully. Remus knew this doctor’s appointment was really Sirius’ first therapy appointment for himself since the attack. Mary came to the house to talk to Regulus twice so far in a casual way while Remus helped Sirius shower or change his bandages to give them some privacy, but Sirius had not begun to process the attack out loud on his own.

“Can we get ice cream after?” Regulus asks.

“No baby, you're going to stay with Remus.” Sirius informs him, reaching out with one hand to stroke Regulus’ curls lovingly.

“Okay, so I'll stay with Remus in the waiting room and then we’ll go and get ice cream after you're done.” Regulus concludes, still not fathoming that he was not going to be going on the mission.

“You and Remus are going to stay here at the apartment.” Sirius tries.

“Yeah, until the small hand goes 5. Next it's your doctor's time. THEN can we get ice cream together?” Regulus nods, seeming confused why he was going in the same circle over and over again.

“Baby, you're not coming with me to the doctors. I am going to get into James’ car and you're going to stay here, at Remus’ apartment.” Sirius sighs.

Regulus’ large grey eyes water, “But why? I'll be good, I promise. I'm always good at your doctor's appointments. I don't even need my own chair, I'll just stand. I won't bring any toys. I'll be good and quiet.”

“Sweet boy, you are so good. I wish I could bring you with me, but it's like when you see Mary and I wait outside to let you have your own privacy.” Sirius tries to explain.

“I'll close my ears.” Regulus bargains.

“I'm sorry baby, you have to stay here.” Sirius puts it bluntly.

“Please don't leave me.” Regulus begs, looking down sadly.

“Oh my Little Star. It's okay, I don't want to leave you either, but we have to start small. I'll be gone for just an hour and I'll have James get some ice cream while I'm with my doctor so we can eat it together when I get home. It'll be okay, lovely boy. Just an hour, and you'll stay here with Remus and play some more.” Sirius pulls Regulus to his side as best as he can and places a gentle kiss on his temple.

“What if mother or father or cousin Bella get you there?” Regulus whimpers.

“I promise you, none of them can hurt us anymore. They are all far away forever and ever. Nothings going to hurt us again baby, it's all good from here and out.” Sirius promises, gently rubbing Regulus’ cheek with his thumb.

Regulus just continues to frown and leans into his brother, “Will you get me gummy bears as a topping?”

“Sure, if that's what you want.” Sirius smiles with surprise.

“Okay.” Regulus agrees, snuggling his head onto Sirius’ shoulder, over the cast.

Sirius sits for a couple minutes, stroking Regulus’ hair, until the boy gets squirmy and wriggles out of his hold.

“I wanna play Legos now, please.” Regulus asks politely.

“Absolutely. You play with Remus and I'm going to go sit in a dark room and stare at the wall for a spell.” Sirius half-jokes.

“Sweet dreams.” Regulus smiles.

“I'll be back in a few minutes.” Sirius snorts, getting up on his crutches and hobbling to the bedroom that he shared with Regulus.

“Play?” Regulus asks Remus, cocking his head.

“Let's do it.” Remus confirms. Before he knew it, he was laying on the carpet on his stomach for two hours building Legos with a very chatty Regulus, a complete contrast to the first time that Remus had been left alone with him.

“I need two black hooky pieces.” Regulus requests.

“Hooky pieces?” Remus snorts.

“Yeah, the pieces with the little hook on the end, that's what Siri calls them, so that's what they must be called.” Regulus says matter-of-factly.

“Sirius calls donuts sugar bagels, tissues sneeze paper, and salad tongs clickers. He's not a reliable source.” Remus points out.

“Maybe everyone else is wrong and Sirius is right.” Regulus shrugs.

“You're funny.” Remus smiles, gazing fondly at the little boy in front of him.

“Not really, I'm quite serious, except Sirius is my brother.” Regulus combats.

“See, that was funny.” Remus smiles.

“Sirius is funnier.” Regulus tries.

“I think you are,” Remus says, pushing his luck by booping Regulus on the nose.

Regulus looks less than impressed.

“Did you stop coming over because Sirius was not funny enough for you?” Regulus asks, and it hits Remus like a punch to the gut.

“No.” Remus promises.

“How come then?” Regulus presses.

“It just didn't work out.” Remus sighs, flopping on his back and staring at the ceiling. Regulus, nonetheless, persisted and crawled over Remus' side of the Lego pile to peer down at Remus with a quizzical look on his face that made Remus want to laugh.

“Bad answer.” Regulus says, making a buzzer noise. “Was it because of me?”

“Merlin, No. Regulus, of course not. You're off the charts, I love hanging out with you. I am so happy to play Legos with you right now.” Remus reassures.

“Then what?” Regulus continues his interrogation.

“I was having trouble putting into words how much I loved you both so I said the wrong words, and it hurt Sirius’ feelings.” Remus puts it delicately.

“Was it at the barbeque at your house?” Regulus inquiries.

“Yes.” Remus nods.

“I figured, Sirius got really sad after.” Regulus nods.

“I'm sorry to hear that.” Remus sighs.

“Do you still love Sirius?” Regulus asks, rather directly.

Remus thinks for not a moment, “Absolutely.”

“You should tell him so. He was happier when you were still friends. He's so sad and grumpy now, I think it would cheer him up to hear. Sirius says that even if you know someone loves you, it's still nice to hear sometimes when I tell him that I know he loves me and he doesn't have to say it all the time. It would be nice for him to hear.” Regulus reasons, still peering down at Remus with wide grey eyes.

“Okay, I'll remind him.” Remus admits defeat rather easily.

“I know he still loves you too, he still has that moon ring you gave him in his nightstand drawer.” Regulus reveals.

“Oh really?” Remus smiles.

“Yeah, so you should tell him you love him.” Regulus reasons.

“You're such a little meddler.” Sirius breezes in, energy restored and quirky personality back on full display as his eyes train on his brother, “You're lucky I can't chase you right now or I'd get you.”

“Siri!” Regulus shrieks, like they had been apart for days, and crashes into Sirius’ legs without hesitation.

“Watch it, clumsy lion, you'll knock us both over.” Sirius rolls his eyes but fondly pets his brother’s hair.

“Nap good?” Regulus asks, looking up at his brother instead of down at Remus.

“Nap GREAT! Lego set good?” Sirius asks, gazing over at the Lego pile while artfully avoiding even a hint of Remus in his peripheral.

“We can't find one black hooky.” Regulus sighs, forgetting all about the embarrassing conversation that his brother had just walked in on.

“Those black hookys are super tricky.” Sirius says, in all seriousness, gently massaging Regulus’ scalp with his fingertips. “Do you want me to find it?”

“Small hand is on three and big hand is on 8.” Regulus frets.

“I have a little time, but someone has to help bring the pieces to me.” Sirius hints.

Remus rolls his eyes, scooping all of the tiny plastic pieces onto the lid of a plastic bin before wordlessly handing them back to Sirius, who of course, finds the missing piece in under a minute with ease.

Then, James shows up and tears burst from everyone’s eyes again.

“I'll be back in an hour baby, it's going to be okay. We have to do this.” Sirius repeats over and over.

“Do you promise you'll come back?” Regulus whimpers.

“Nothing could keep me.” Sirius swears, linking his pinky with his child’s and bringing the linked fingers to his lips to plant a quick kiss on.

Remus picks Regulus up and settles the boy on his hip so that Sirius could hug him properly. And when Sirius wraps his arms around the boy, Remus can almost trick himself into believing that Sirius was hugging him again.

“I love you my sweet little star.” Sirius says, turning to leave with a final blow of a kiss.

Remus rubs a hand down Regulus’s back in comfort before gently reaching out to let his fingers graze on Sirius’ wrist.

Sirius frowned and flinched like Remus’ touch had burned.

“We should talk about before.” Remus whispers before he can stop himself.

Sirius steels himself and stretches out awkwardly before looking directly at Remus for the first time since.

“Are you around at six PM tomorrow?” Sirius asks.

“Of course.” Remus trips over himself.

“Good, I have a tour of an apartment and I need someone to hold Reggie while I talk to the real estate agent and stay with him if he needs.” Sirius states, clipped, before the door closes.

Remus feels himself panic. Real estate agent? Apartment tour? He thought he would have more time. How could he sabotage this? Convince the landlord to advertise ghosts in the place? Drop on his knees and beg? What could he possibly say or do to make them want to stay?

Sirius comes back with ice cream with gummy bears and six of the next day comes way too soon for Remus’ liking. In the morning, Sirius had visited his doctor and they had taken his cast from above the knee, to just below it and replaced his cast with a walkable boot, so he was able to walk without crutches.

Sirius hasn't exactly been entirely forthcoming with his decision to show the apartment to Regulus, but the boy was just happy to get out of the apartment and go for a walk. He would watch paint dry on the building wall out front if it meant some fresh air at this point.

However, for some odd reason, Sirius had insisted on dressing both him and his son in business casual. Both of them were wearing long sleeves, so you couldn't really see the twinned casts on their arms, and Sirius’ pants covered his boot so well that you could barely tell unless you were looking at his shoes.

“This sweater is itchy! This is a Thanksgiving only sweater!” Regulus whines as Sirius battles to give his child a middle part and tame his curls.

“Tough stuff kiddo, I need you looking like you're not homeless if we want any chance of getting a home.” Sirius quips as he combs down his brother's hair with gel.

‘You have a home here’ Remus wants to scream.

“How come you took out your piercings and covered your tattoos?” Regulus frowns as Sirius tries to wrestle him into dress shoes.

“Sometimes, you gotta play the game baby.” Sirius shrugs.

“Play a game?” Regulus wrinkles his nose. “I thought we were seeing an apartment.”

“We are, but you need to look so cute and so sweet that the real estate lady gets over her fear of a kid in her apartment. I need you to look like you do crossword puzzles and write poetry on the weekends.” Sirius quips.

“What's poetry?” Regulus frowns.

“We might need to tell the lady you can do taxes and her childs’ homework for free so she likes us.” Sirius continues to joke.

“I'm not doing extra homework.” Regulus frowns, “Why are we moving?”

“Because we need a house.” Sirius explains.

“I don't want to move! And my sweater is itchy!” Regulus pouts, and the cycle begins all over again.

Technically, Sirius was not forcing Remus to wear a Polo and slacks, in fact, Remus felt like he was the hired nanny, but he still wanted to conform. Even though a less mature part of him wanted to wear sweatpants and make comments about how Sirius is planning to run an illegal endangered-bird fighting ring out of the apartment to keep him from leaving.

The moment they stepped through the door to the apartment and met the landlady, Regulus turned from pouty to anxious immediately. Sirius attempted to subtly squeeze his baby brother’s hand and rub his back, but there was nothing he could do to help while also chatting to the real estate agent, so Remus stepped in and settled the first-grader on his hip, trying not to let it show how emotional he felt when he realized that Regulus settled right in and felt immediately safe in Remus’ arms.

“Hi Regulus.” She beamed. “You look so much like your father. What a lovely little family!”

Regulus gives a tiny wave before ducking his head shyly in Remus’ neck.

“He's a little shy around new people.” Sirius explains quickly.

“What happened to you and your son if you don't mind me asking?” The real estate agent, Susan, asks.

“Car accident.” Sirius lies through his brilliantly dazzling white teeth.

“You poor things.” Susan gushes.

“It was terrible timing with my lease expiring, but thankfully we’re both on the mend and ready to move onto, and into, better places.” Sirius charms.

“Absolutely!” Susan beams.

“How's the school system?” Sirius inquires as they move through the kitchen.

“An amazing system. My Bill just started kindergarten at Kings Cross Primary Center. I love his teachers and he's on a great football team.” Susan gushes.

“Oh brilliant! Reg, maybe we can start you on football.” Sirius jokes.

“Nope.” Regulus shakes his head no before laying it on Remus’ shoulder.

“He's much more into reading and science than sports. But these apartments are so close to the library and the park, we could really do anything. We also love taking trips to the planetarium and it's only a few quick blocks from this place.” Sirius beams.

“Where do you work, is it close to Godric’s Hollow?” Susan inquires.

“I work at a children’s psychology office. It's about a twenty-minute tram ride, but I have a private practice license, so I am also looking into opening my own practice eventually.” Sirius smiles.

“And where do you work?” Susan asks Remus, surprising the shit out of him. Sirius had introduced him as Remus.

“I work at Saint Mungo’s, in the emergency department.” Remus smiles.

“A doctor and a psychologist, you two make quite a smart couple.” Susan smiles.

“We-” Sirius falters for a second, clearly not having thought Remus’ presence through.

“Thank you!” Remus steps in, grabbing Sirius’ hand and lacing his fingers with Sirius’, while pretending that his heart beat didn't just triple. “Can we see the bedrooms?”

“Absolutely!” Susan beams, whisking them away.

It isn't until they get to the empty smaller bedroom that Remus realizes that Sirius still has not let go of his hand.

“Look Reggie, this would be your room. Look how nice the ceiling is. We could put some new glow in the dark star stickers on. And look at the view out the window! We could put a little bench with a couch seat on it and read while sitting on your window seat.” Sirius visualizes.

“What about my wall stars?” Regulus asks.

“I could do new stars.” Sirius offers, rubbing Regulus’ arm.

“What if I want to sleep in your bed?” Regulus frets.

“You're always welcome with us, bud.” Remus plays up.

Sirius glares. If Regulus is confused by the switch-up or even notices it, he does not indicate it.

“There's no bed or bed stand.” Regulus frowns, confused by the empty apartment with no furniture.

“That's the beauty of a fresh start, sweet star, we get to go pick it all out.” Sirius beams.

Regulus practically wilts.

“I like our furniture.” Regulus whimpers, looking like he was on the verge of bursting into tears.

“Oh baby,” Sirius melts, visibly softening and dropping his confident act in favor of reaching out his arms. It takes some work between the two of them, but Remus manages to cleanly pass off Regulus to Sirius. Remu internally winces, knowing it must hurt like hell to hold a six-year-old with still-healing stitches in your stomach, a broken arm, and a cast on your leg, but Sirius did not show it.

“Can we play Uno when we go home?” Regulus asks, distracted and squirming all of a sudden in Sirius’ arms.

“Course we can.” Sirius smiles, gently dragging his fingertips up and down Regulus’ forearm in a soothing motion that seemed to ease Regulus’ energy.

“Shall we tour the main bedroom?” Susan beams.

Sirius fills out a paper application and leaves it with Susan, needing approval from the owner’s, a background check, references, before being approved or denied. And the three drive home in silence.

“Did you like that home?” Sirius murmurs.

“No.” Regulus frowns, looking out the window and crossing his arms.

“Okay, I only filled out a form. We don't have to live there. We can look at different homes.”

“I don't want a different place, I want to stay.” Regulus whines.

“Baby.” Sirius frowns, but Regulus goes silent and ignores him.

Remus makes dinner while Sirius takes care of Regulus’ bath, and then the three eat dinner in awkward silence while Sirius tries to push Regulus to talk to him, Regulus sits with a blank face, and Remus pretends that his star-shaped pasta is the most interesting and mesmerizing dish he has ever seen in his life.

Remus is washing the dishes when he hears muffled voices of frustration and then Sirius stomping out to flop dramatically on the couch.

Remus does not pry, but sits on the opposite end of the couch and tilts his head towards Sirius.

“Regulus wants some space from me, and it's hard when I don't have space of my own, so I'm going to camp out here for a little bit until he's asleep.” Sirius volunteers, staring at his cuticles.

“Make yourself at home.” Remus nods.

“That's the problem, he doesn't want to move out because he has. Fuck.” Sirius sits up, digging the heels of his hands into his eyes. “He's had so much. He's been through so much. So many changes and so much bad.”

“You're doing the best you can.” Remus says softly.

“It's not enough. Wasn't enough to keep him safe.” Sirius shudders.

“S-” Remus reaches out but Sisiur is up and flinching, wheeling on Remus.

“James told me that you were there, in the hospital when we came in. That you took Regulus and held him until James got there.” Sirius snaps, sounding like he was accusing rather than thanking.

“I did. I saw you two come in and Regulus was fighting all the staff and clinging to you. I took him into my arms, and he went willingly. I brought him to a private room, changed his clothes into fresh pajamas, examined him, casted his arm, and did the stitches on his cheek myself, all while holding him. I sang him a lullaby, held him until he fell asleep, and did not let go until James came.” Remus recounts.

Sirius sucks in a breath, “James says you called Peter.”

“I didn't know anything at that point, I swear. I was just trying to find help and answers because James wouldn't answer.”

“He was with the police.” Sirius supplies.

“I was so scared.” Remus says with his voice cracking.

“Was, was he? Was Regulus.” Sirius whimpers.

“Very, but he calmed down with me and loved when I sang to him, just like you would.” Remu answers.

“I'm glad I wasn't awake for that part. I don't think I could have handled seeing him in that much pain.” Sirius sighs, deflating and squeezing his eyes shut as burning hit tears traced down his cheeks.

“He kept asking for you.” Remus adds, reaching his hand out to inch between him and Sirius' open hand, “He was scared and in pain, but more than anything he was focused on you.”

Sirius reaches out and grabs it, like he was bracing himself for impact, “Did he know how bad I was? Did I look bad?”

“You were unconscious, all bloodied and limp. He knew and saw. He was fighting, screaming, and kicking to stay with you. He wasn't scared of his own injuries, HOW you looked, or what had happened. He wasn't scared of you, he was scared FOR you. They were considering sedation until I stepped in and grabbed him and he just melted right in place in my arms.” Remus recalls, staring right into Sirius’ grey eyes.

All the ice cold fury melted from Sirius’ eyes and posture as he leaned forward and crashed, with loud and ugly sobs, right into Remus’ arms. It's a mess of limbs, casts, choked apologies, and tears, but it's them, and Remus wouldn't give it up for the world.

“Don't go.” Remus rushes, holding Sirius tighter.

“I don't want to, but it hurts to stay.” Sirius responds, into Remus’ shoulder.

“It doesn't have to. We can heal together. We can make it better.” Remus promises.

“I don't know how we would even start.” Sirius chokes.

“Right here, we’ve already started. That's the hard part. The rest won't be easy, but the hard part is always the start.” Remus promises.

The two pull apart and settle back in on the couch, side by hand with hands intertwined between them.

“Sirius, I am so s-”

Remus is cut off by a familiar blur crashing in between them, just like he did on the day that Remus met him.

“I had a bad dream.” Regulus sobs, clambering half-onto Sirius’ lap and half-onto Remus’- throwing an arm around each of them, but burying his head into Sirius’ shoulder.

“You're okay bud.” Remus coos, instantly rubbing Regulus’ back.

“Yeah, sweet star, everything is going to be okay.” Sirius promises, a fond twinkle in his eyes as he kisses the top of Regulus' head.