Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Fall, 2008.

“So you have kids, you said?” Emilia Matthews asked, lifting her gaze from the laptop to the nervous woman sitting across the table. Emilia intertwined her fingers atop the dark, polished wood.

“Uh—Kid. One,” Vera stammered, swallowing hard as her palms grew clammy. This was her first job interview in ages, and since giving birth to her beloved daughter, finding work had been a nightmare. No one warns you about the challenges of being a single mother, desperately searching for anything that would pay the bills and offer her child some quality of life after turning thirty. This was her opportunity—being a nanny for the sweet little girl playing in the backyard, chasing after moths. “It’s just my Nat.” She managed a nervous smile.

Anxious, Vera felt the weight of two pairs of eyes scrutinizing her every move. She straightened her spine and cleared her throat. Vera, you have to look put together!

The elegant woman on the right side of the table hummed thoughtfully. “And how old is she?”

“Eight. She turned eight last week, actually.” Vera's face lit up as she recalled the joy on her daughter’s face during her Addams Family-themed birthday party. Natalie had been so happy that, later that night, she complained about sore cheeks from all the smiling.

Emilia's hazel eyes brightened with excitement as she glanced at her husband, Malcolm Matthews, whose serious greenish-brown eyes were clouded with uncertainty.

“Well, that’s—” Malcolm frowned, thick brown eyebrows pinching together. He looked at Emilia for reassurance. “Good?”

“Very good. Perfect, even.” Emilia flashed a warm, reassuring smile at Vera, easing some of her tension. “It’s just—Mal and I can be quite… busy most of the time. We travel a lot.” She glanced at her delicate hands. “And Charlotte can be a little reluctant when it comes to boarding planes or flying at all.”

“Exactly. We usually leave her at Jones' residence when needed, but since little Laura Lee got sick, it’s not ideal to ask them to keep an eye on her.” Malcolm added. “And Lottie—she can be kind of—” He hesitated, choosing his words carefully. “—peculiar.”

“What he means is, she doesn’t have many friends. We were thinking—”

“If you can, of course,” Malcolm interjected.

“Yes. Um, if you could bring Natalie to play with her sometimes. They’re around the same age, and we think it would be good for her to be around another kid.” Emilia's gaze drifted toward the large window, where a little olive-skinned girl with soft, dark, wavy hair was playing, two pink bows perched on either side of her head. The girl was staring intently at one of the trees in the garden—the biggest one. “Of course, if it’s not too much to ask. You’ll be looking after two children, after all.” Emilia’s eyes returned to Vera, filled with concern.

“Oh, don’t worry about it! It would be great to keep an eye on Nat as well. You know, the more friends you have, the happier you are,” Vera said gently, relieved she wouldn’t have to leave her daughter at her mother’s house anymore. Dora was a wonderful grandmother who adored Nat, but she spoiled her with too much candy, leaving Vera to deal with sleepless nights. If Natalie didn’t sleep, neither did her mother.

“She’s not a troublemaker, either,” Malcolm chuckled lightly. “She’s actually pretty quiet—maybe a little too much, I’d say.” He whispered the last part.

“I figured. She looks like a very polite little lady. You must have educated her well,” Vera replied, glancing back at the girl.

Still staring at that tree.

“Well, thank you.” Emilia offered a warm smile. “Oh, speaking of which—” She picked up a folder from her husband’s black briefcase and set it on the table.

Semiannual Educational Planning - Charlotte Isobel Matthews.

Vera’s heart raced as she skimmed the documents. Lottie didn’t attend a regular school. Instead, she had a private tutor—Miss Stevens—so Vera wouldn’t have to worry about daily drop-offs. The tutor came every Monday through Saturday at 2 PM.

Fancy stuff, Vera thought, her eyes darting over the papers. At just seven years old, the little girl was already learning French, Spanish, and Mandarin.

Seven.

She was seven. 

“[...] And since you’ll be here for our longer trips, we were thinking—if you’re interested, of course—about adding Natalie to the plan as well.” Malcolm handed her a few more documents, the annual schedule of a third grader printed in bold black ink. Vera's eyes widened as she glanced over the papers.

Chemistry? Biology? Literature—Pottery?

What do they put in rich people’s water? Literature? Really? Natalie barely knows how to read.

Yet, as she thought about it, this could be a fantastic opportunity for Natalie. A quality education like this didn’t come around often. She could get good grades, maybe even earn a spot at college one day. It would be an incredible deal.

If only she could afford it.

And she couldn’t.

“That’s really thoughtful, and I’m extremely grateful, but I don’t think I could pay for—” Vera said, shrinking back in her chair. It wasn’t exactly a secret that she and her family struggled financially, but admitting it out loud still felt humiliating.

“Oh! No, no, no!” Emilia's eyes widened. “It’s completely on us! Since you’ll be taking care of Charlotte while we’re away, it’s only fair that we provide some things for both of you. That includes education and health insurance,” Malcolm explained. “Again, only if you’re comfortable with it.”

“I—well, yeah!” Vera chuckled in disbelief. “How could I say no to that? Wow, thank you! Truly, that’s—wait. Does that mean—” She hesitated, and Malcolm’s eyes widened as he realized they hadn’t explicitly said the three little words.

“Oh, yes! Yes…?” He looked at Emilia, searching for confirmation. It came in the form of a smile and a nod.

“You are hired.” Emilia beamed, extending her hand for a shake. Vera quickly took it, momentarily forgetting her clammy palms. The other woman laughed lightly at the sensation.

“Thank you! Oh my God, thank you so much!” Vera’s heart raced. She released Emilia’s hand and stood, feeling lightheaded as she hugged both her new employers, planting gentle kisses on each of their cheeks.

“Oh!” Malcolm chuckled at the sudden affection, patting her back lightly. “You seem like a wonderful person, Vera,” he said sincerely.

[...]

The swirling pattern on the tree trunk made Charlotte’s head spin, the edges of her vision fading to black. She wondered if this was how horses felt when people put blinders on them, forcing them to look straight ahead. Her brown eyes could only focus on the spiral in front of her, going inwards and inwards and inwards.

Trees don’t move. Do they?

The rough bark felt strangely soft, almost like a reflection shimmering on water. She was certain that if she reached out to touch it, her fingers would sink into the trunk, pulled inside as if it were a living thing.

The sound of the wind rustling through the leaves was soothing.

Psithurism. A word of Greek origin.

It means whisper. Miss Stevens had told her that once.

It was funny how the beautiful sound of the wind dancing with the leaves was called a whisper. It didn’t sound like the senseless, mumbled words that were whispered to her so quietly that she could easily ignore them. 

Most of the time.

“Hey, sweetie.” Her mother’s tender voice broke through, accompanied by delicate fingers touching her back.

Finally able to tear her eyes away from the spinning wood, Charlotte looked up at her mom, her face lighting up. “Mommy! Hi!”

“Hello, baby.” Emilia smiled back, concern flickering in her eyes. “Are you okay? You’ve been sitting here for a while.” She rubbed gentle circles on Charlotte’s back. The little girl nodded, still beaming.

“Mhm, just listening to the trees.”

“Oh, yeah? That’s great,” her mother said sweetly. “I’d like to introduce you to someone."

“Is it the blonde woman? Her hair looks like honey. I want to tell her that,” Lottie whispered, her tiny hands covering the sides of her mouth.

“That’s right, pumpkin. Maybe you should do it. She’s right behind you.” Emilia mimicked her daughter’s whisper.

Charlotte’s eyes widened as she slowly turned to face the green-eyed woman standing beside her father. Both adults smiled warmly at her, and the woman waved.

“Can you be a polite girl and introduce yourself?” Malcolm encouraged, lightly squeezing Charlotte’s hand twice. You can do it.

Taking a deep breath, Lottie corrected her posture and stepped toward Vera, reaching out her free hand.

“Hi, my name is Charlotte,” she said shyly. “What’s yours?”

Vera crouched to be eye level with the little girl, taking her trembling hand in hers. “Hey, kiddo! I’m Vera.” She smiled at Charlotte’s big brown eyes. “I’ve heard you like my hair.”

“I do. I think it’s pretty.” Lottie lowered her gaze shyly. “I like this too.” She let go of her father’s hand and touched the shining piercing on Vera’s nose.

“Well, thank you! I like your little bows; they suit you well.” Vera gently touched both sides of Charlotte’s head, eliciting a smile that revealed two missing front teeth. “Oh my God! You’re already getting toothless? Even an old lady like me has all her teeth. Look!” She playfully opened her mouth to show her dental arch.

Lottie giggled, her body relaxing. “No! They’ll grow back!”

“Are you sure? I think you’ll have to eat soup for the rest of your life.” Vera scrunched her nose playfully.

“Yes, I am! One day, I’ll have all my teeth back, but they’ll be bigger and stronger, and I’ll eat tons of hard candy!” Lottie declared, still laughing.

“ Tons? ” Emilia’s voice came from behind the girl. Lottie turned to see her mother wearing a playful smile, her honey-colored eyes squinting.

“Just a little?” Lottie said, lifting her hand in a pinching gesture.

“Maybe if you’re a good girl while we’re away, Vera can give you some,” Malcolm suggested.

“Only a little, though. We don’t want to visit Dr. Roberts and her scary teeth machines again, do we?” Emilia touched her daughter’s nose. Lottie shook her head vigorously.

“Great.”

Suddenly, Lottie felt a gentle nudge on her forearm. Looking down, she found a lollipop resting in the palm of a pale hand. “Just because I like you,” Vera whispered, winking at her. Charlotte smiled brightly.

She likes her too.

Lungs burning.

It felt like she was breathing fire.

Her legs ached, and keeping her pace was becoming increasingly difficult. She wanted nothing more than to throw herself on the ground and lie there, but the footsteps were getting closer. She couldn’t stop. She wouldn’t stop.

Through the trees, she spotted the figures closing in—one to her right, another to her left.

No. Not this time.

Frantically, she scanned her surroundings, searching for somewhere—anywhere—to run. A place they wouldn’t follow her. But there was nothing. Surrounded by trees and small hills, she had nowhere to hide from those pursuing her.

She shouldn’t do this, but she had to.

Running toward the nearest tree, she leaped, grabbing the lowest branch with her hands. With the last bit of strength she had, she pulled herself up, swinging her body until the branch reached her chest. She kicked her legs, somehow managing to catch the branch with them, too.

Kind of.

Now, she hung upside down, her arms and legs wrapped around the branch, her back completely exposed. Like a koala, she was stuck, with no strength to move and too afraid to let go.

The footsteps slowed, and she could hear the leaves crackling beneath them as they drew closer.

“Hey! That’s not fair!” The first voice called from below.

“Yeah, Nat!” another chimed in, a little farther back.

“You can’t just climb trees to avoid being tagged, Natalie!” the third girl snorted, making her laugh.

“You know what’s not fair? The three of you chasing me! That’s not how you play Tag!” Natalie complained, tilting her head back to see the trio upside down. Shauna supported her weight on scratched knees, trying to catch her breath; Taissa had leaves tangled in her hair, sweat glistening on her forehead; Misty would look fine if it weren’t for her bright red face and foggy glasses.

“It’s not fun playing with you. You’re too good at this,” Shauna pouted, walking over to sit on a nearby log that looked like a little throne. Taissa followed, settling cross-legged between her friends’ lower limbs.

“Not like it’s her fault that we’re suck, guys,” Misty crossed her arms. “Should we play something else?”

“Simon says!” Taissa clapped her hands excitedly.

“Okay, but you can’t be Simon this time,” Shauna proposed.

“Why not?!”

“You’re always Simon, Tai!” Misty pointed out. “And you always create these silly rules.”

“They’re not silly!”

Natalie stopped paying attention to the girls when she felt her abdomen begin to shake. Her arms were losing their grip. She tightened her legs around the branch, regretting her choice to wear shorts to school that day as splinters dug into her inner thighs. “Oh, shoot!” she exclaimed under her breath.

The bark scratched her forearms as she slipped, and she tried to hold herself with her hands instead—but failed. The sudden weight of her upper body, now hanging completely upside down, caused her legs to let go of the branch.

Natalie fell to the hard ground with a thud, hitting her head on an exposed tree root. Dazed, she felt lightheaded, her eyes growing heavy.

“What the hell?!”

“Nat!”

She couldn’t distinguish the voices; they all sounded distant as her consciousness began to slip away.

“Holy macaroni! Her arm!”

“Is that her bone? Oh my freaking God!”

“I’m getting Coach Martinez!”

[...]

It was her fourth failed attempt to crack her sore knuckles against her nervous, trembling hands. The clacking of the keyboard from the receptionist’s desk, combined with the strobing, eye-blinding white lights, was becoming unbearable. A familiar smell assaulted her nostrils, and she winced. Her ears began to ring.

“Mammy…” Her head was pounding, and she didn’t feel like opening her eyes, knowing that the brightness of the living room would only make it worse. She grumbled again, “M-Mammy, my chest h-hurts…” She said it weakly, breathless.

“What do you want?” A raspy voice crawled out of a dry mouth. Taking a deep breath, she realized for the first time in a while just how awful she—and their trailer—smelled. It was a mix of alcohol, medicine, and rotten fish.

When was the last time she took the trash out? Actually, when was the last time she got up from this armchair? She had no idea.

A groan followed by a dull thump made her open her heavy eyes. The reddish marbles darted around lazily, taking in the pure mess of her life. Roaches scuttled out from the dirty sink; the kitchen table was a mountain of stacked pizza boxes and takeout containers; beer bottles littered the floor; and beside a tiny, collapsed body lay a single orange bottle.

Her eyes widened, and she got up quickly, feeling the room spin as violently as her head. She felt like throwing up but pushed it down as the little hands reached for her leg.

“Natalie! What’s wrong?” The older woman dropped to her knees, wrapping her arms around her daughter and placing a hand over the trembling chest.

Her heart was pounding like a drum. “M-Medicine.” She breathed out, lifting a shaky finger to point at the blue digital clock on the side table.

4:43 PM.

The medicine.

Her fucking medicine.

Dora had taken Natalie to the dentist a couple of days ago because the girl kept complaining about a sore tooth. Cavities. She’d undergone a root canal and needed to take Ibuprofen once a day to ease the pain in the first few days.

Vera was supposed to give her the medicine.

But she was too busy wallowing in her own misery, getting shit-faced and ignoring her child to actually do it. She couldn’t even remember the last time she fed Natalie.

He was right; they weren’t so different after all. She was acting just like him.

Like he had before leaving her alone with a five-month-old baby in this hellhole he’d dragged them to.

In the end, she was just as bad a mother as he was a father.

Natalie had to fend for herself. She had to be a big girl, climb onto the bathroom sink to reach the cabinet, grab the orange pill bottle with her name on it, and swallow the white and blue pills—usually just one, but the pain was too much. Maybe two would do the trick, right?

She had to do all that.

But she was three.

And didn’t know how to read.

Vera reached over the now convulsing little body to read the label.

Scatorccio, Dora—Captopril 50mg.

Fuck.

FUCK!

“Vera Lucia Scatorccio?” A nurse entered the waiting room, clipboard in hand, breaking the foggy memories that threatened to overwhelm her in the sterile, white-and-green surroundings. Vera reached into her jacket pocket and squeezed her four-year sobriety coin.

For years, she had been nothing but a reflection of Derek’s anger and selfishness. At the time, being consumed by the darkness he’d left behind hadn’t bothered her; she was already drowning in her own despair. The feeling wasn’t too different.

But as soon as the mix of both of their black goo’s started to seep into Natalie's room, threatening to grab her by the ankles and sink her to its depths, she had to start fighting. Fight to free herself from the sticky dark liquid who kept her glued to that armchair; the one who kept bringing bottle after bottle to her hands and lips; the one who blinded her from the ongoing neglect towards the only clean, pure being in that hole.

At the same time she had to cease her own leak, oozing from the opening at her chest.

She had to protect the little ball of warmth that lingered by her side, even on the coldest nights.

She had to at least try—for Nat.

He was wrong; she wasn’t as bad as him.

She was a good mother to Natalie. She had to be.

Vera raised her shaking hands. “You can come in now,” she beckoned, leading the way down the hallway. “She’s awake, so you can finally breathe.” The redhead touched her arm with a warm smile. “She’s doing fine—just a mild concussion, no memory loss. But she’ll need to avoid these kinds of adventures for a while, considering her brain is still recovering.” Taking a deep breath, she glanced at Natalie’s file. “About her arm: she was lucky. It was a complex fracture, but we managed to put it back in place. The external fixator shouldn’t need to stay on longer than 12 weeks. She also has a moderate knee sprain, which means she’ll need to follow the RICE rule and wear a knee brace for at least two weeks.”

Vera blinked slowly, trying to absorb the avalanche of information.

“Sorry, the RICE rule?” she asked, wrapping her arms around herself in a failed attempt to ward off the hospital’s coldness.

“Oh, yes! Rest, Ice, Compress, and Elevate,” the nurse explained as they reached room 505. The door was open, and Vera’s legs wobbled.

Her poor baby girl lay there, all patched up. Natalie’s right leg was raised by a sling, her left arm confined by metal bars digging into her skin. She had bruises everywhere and a black left eye.

“Hello, Mother!” Natalie greeted her with a huge smile. Even in these conditions, she radiated warmth.

Vera felt tears prick her eyes. “Baby…” She rushed closer to the hospital bed. “Y-your arm—how did you…?”

“I fell out of a tree, but it’s okay! It doesn’t hurt anymore,” Natalie said, moving her broken arm a little.

“Yeah, that’s because you’re on some strong medication, little girl. Don’t move around too much, or you’ll feel it all again.” The nurse approached them. “By the way, once you’re discharged, I need you not to touch the stitches, okay? None of them.” She pointed to the girl’s patched eyebrows. “We don’t want them to get infected, do we?”

Natalie shook her head and sat up, eager to show her new acquisition to her mother. “Do you think it’s gonna leave a nice scar? Like a pirate?” Regret filled her grayish-blue eyes as she wiggled her eyebrows, feeling a sting. The stitches were still fresh. “Ouch! Your strong medication isn’t working in some places…”

Vera's heart tightened in her chest, her lungs struggling to provide enough air to ease her dizziness. But she felt better. Natalie was strong; she was fine.

So, she allowed herself to laugh.

Vera laughed because that’s just how her daughter was. She truly was the sun, capable of warming everyone and bringing light wherever she went. A sun that could’ve exploded that evening, ceasing to exist, leaving only its light behind.

Witnessing something like that—seeing her precious girl get injured—showed her just how far they had come and offered a glimpse of what was to come.

Natalie was alive. Even after all the turbulence of her early years.

That was what kept Vera Scatorccio going.

Later that week, Natalie was finally allowed to go home. She couldn’t stand the constant smell of amoxicillin and ether anymore; the white walls were driving her crazy. Plus, seeing her mom asleep in that ugly green chair made her feel guilty.

As soon as she walked out through the automatic doors, two small bodies bounded toward her, their excitement palpable as the adults were still climbing out of the beige Hyundai H-1. The last girl struggled to hold a large basket of apples, inching closer to Natalie.

“Tai! Let Daddy help you with that, would you?” Taissa’s dad called out, rushing toward her. But Taissa tightened her grip on the basket, looking away and refusing the helping hand.

“I can do it,” she declared, her determined expression clear. Taissa had a mission, and nothing would stop her.

The short, bearded man shrugged. “’Aight, if you say so.” He knew better than to get in his daughter’s way; when she wanted something, she would make it happen.

“Hello, Natalie. Can you understand me?” Misty asked, speaking painfully slow and loud, as if addressing an elderly person. She pointed at Natalie when she said “you” and then at herself for “me.”

“Misty, she’s not stupid!” Shauna retorted, crossing her arms.

“When you have a concussion, you might experience temporary cognitive issues, like confusion and bad comprehension,” Misty replied, pushing her glasses up with her right middle finger. “I’m just trying to communicate.”

Natalie let out a soft laugh, amused by their banter.

With a groan, Taissa finally set the bag down at Natalie’s feet, making a dull thud on the pavement. “Here it is,” she panted, beaming. One of the apples had a little face crafted from toothpicks, with blueberries for eyes, a piece of carrot for a nose, and a peeled banana split in half for a smile. “Hope you enjoy it!”

“I asked Mom to buy you a cake, but Misty said you would lose your arm, and I got scared,” Shauna admitted, her hands behind her back. “We thought of getting you a watermelon, but Tai said apples were better, so we got these. I also picked some flowers for you.” She extended her arms, revealing a tiny bouquet of yellow and blue blooms, tied together with a pink shoelace. “Here.” Natalie smiled, mumbling a simple ‘Thanks, Shaun.’ as she accepted the handmade gift, holding it close to her chest.

“ Could . I said she could lose her arm,” Misty muttered under her breath. “It’s common knowledge that refined carbohydrates, starches, sugar, and foods with a high glycemic index should be avoided when you’re recovering from an injury.” She rolled her eyes at the brunette before smiling at Natalie. “But you can eat the whole thing. It’s all yours.”

“No one’s losing any limbs, kids. C’mon, let her breathe a little,” Mrs. Shipman chimed in from behind the girls. She crouched to touch Natalie’s face, her sweet eyes filled with concern. “Hi, darling. How do you feel?”

“I’m okay. My head just hurts a little, and I need to take a shower. I smell like a sick oldie…” Natalie scrunched her nose and waved a hand in front of her face.

“Yeah, you do,” Taissa added, earning a scolding glance from her parents. “What? It’s true.”

[...]

In the car on their way home, Natalie sat beside Taissa, gazing out the window at the orange leaves fluttering by. Their parents were deep in conversation about work or something else; she didn’t care enough to pay attention.

“Oh!” Taissa exclaimed, reaching into her pockets. She pulled out a piece of paper folded in half, covered in colorful doodles. “Van asked me to give you this.”

natnat, i’m really sorry about your contusion confusi

concussion. 

i hope you don't lose your arm like misty said you wold would <3

with love, 

Vassen

Vanessa Palmer :)

[...]

The first thing Natalie saw as they arrived at the trailer park was a huge package sitting at their door. The car had barely stopped when the girls rushed out, hearing one of the parents call, “Careful, no need to rush!”

The box, almost as tall as the girls, was wrapped in white and blue stripes and topped with an enormous white bow.

“What the hell?” Natalie, with her broken arm, examined every corner of the mysterious package. “Mom, what's this?”

“No idea, baby.” Vera walked over. “Wanna help me open it?” Natalie hesitated; they didn’t usually get surprises like this. It felt strange.

Her head was forced to nod by Shauna's hands.

“She does.”  

“Wait, what if it's a bomb? Do you guys have any enemies?” The older Quigley said, pulling everyone away from the package. “You can't just open things like that.”

“Are bombs even this big?” Taissa tilted her head in thought.

“If it’s an atomic bomb, maybe.” Berry shrugged, resting his hands on Taissa's shoulders.

“Tsk, tsk… Such easy targets…” Misty opened her mother’s handbag, pulling out a portable black light and a pair of blue latex gloves. She handed them to her.

“Sandra, why the fuck do you walk around with this thing?” Deb asked, quickly covering her mouth, realizing she had just sworn. “Sorry, girls. Don’t repeat that.”

“You never know when you might need to investigate a possible bomb.” Sandra carefully ran her hands over the five sides of the box. “No wires, good.” Using her keys, she tore open a hole in the wrapping and shined the purple light at the brown surface, searching for anything suspicious. “Well, at first it doesn’t seem dangerous. But maybe that's what they want us to think.” She took off her gloves and pushed her glasses up with her right middle finger, just like her daughter. “Sorry, girls. I’ll have to do some deep research on this thing. I’ll need to take it home and—”

“Oh my god, shut up!” Vera pushed her aside and tore the packaging apart, revealing—“A wheelchair? What?”

More precisely, an electric wheelchair.

“Oh, that’s cool…” Natalie said, a smile spreading across her face. “Who is it from?” Vera mumbled an ‘I don’t know.’ confusion etched on her face.

“Wait, look!” Taissa held up one of those ‘Get Well Soon” cards.’ “It was stuck to the bow.” She turned it around and began to read aloud:

“Dear Natalie,

Your mom told us about your situation, so here’s a little something for your injured self. We wish you a speedy recovery!

P.S. Vera, Charlotte misses you tons! We may have accidentally mentioned that you’re bringing Nat to visit, so now she—and all of us, honestly—are super excited to meet her. Oops! Hope you can visit soon.

Best wishes,
Emilia and Malcolm,

and Charlotte!”

It was the perfect day—the day Vera would finally bring Natalie to meet her bosses and their daughter. Lottie had been buzzing with excitement lately, asking about Natalie’s likes and dislikes, how she imagined her, and a thousand other questions about the “Natalie Matter.”

As they walked up the trail, the sun filtered through the trees, casting playful shadows on the ground. Vera was making steady progress, while Natalie zipped around joyfully in her new motorized wheelchair, zig-zagging with glee.

When they reached the end of the trail, a vast field filled with colorful flowers and towering trees opened up before them. In the distance, a charming shingle-style house beckoned, its stone foundation and vine-covered walls giving it a warm cottage vibe.

“Oh! Hi! Hello!” A woman in a flowy purple dress came trotting through the garden, her brown wavy hair bouncing with each step. Her wide smile radiated warmth as she approached.

As she neared, her smile faltered, noticing Natalie spinning in her wheelchair.

“I knew it! I knew it, and I told you!” A tall man appeared behind her, grinning with delight. He wore a loose cream-colored blouse and linen white pants. “She has a broken arm , love.”

“But- I could've sworn there was something about her legs too.” She looked bewildered, placing a hand over her chest. 

“But I could’ve sworn there was something about her legs too,” the woman said, looking bewildered as she placed a hand over her chest.

“It was just my knee! But I'm okay now.” Natalie stopped her spinning and stood up. “See?” She jumped, crouched, and knelt, showcasing how the two whole weeks of being prohibited from getting off the bed by her mother and granny, had worked wonders in her recovery. “Perfectly fine!” She beamed, reaching out to hug the couple around their waists, one at a time. “I’m Natalie Magdalene Scatorccio. It’s nice to meet you!” She smiled, showing them her - now growing, bottom teeths. “Oh! Thanks for giving my mum a job!”

“Hi, Natalie Magdalene Scatorccio! I’m Malcolm Matthews, and this is my lovely wife, Emilia Marie Matthews.” He brushed a stray hair from Natalie’s face while Emilia gently caressed her cheek, whispering, “Hi, darling.” “We’re the ones grateful for your mom’s kindness and patience while taking care of our daughter.” Natalie's eyes lit up at the mention of the other child. “What? Do you want to meet her? You didn’t just come to see us?” Malcolm feigned offense, opening his mouth wide.

“Well, yeah! I don’t think we have much to talk about, do we? Besides, I’ve just met you. Hi!” She waved cheerfully. “I’d like to meet her now.”

Both of the Matthews burst into laughter, while Vera felt her face flush bright red.

“Natalie! Be respectful!” she whispered, trying to contain her embarrassment.

“She’s so funny!” Emilia exclaimed, fanning her face with her hands, trying to catch her breath.

“Okay, captain!” The man saluted with a smile. “Let’s find out where my daughter is!” He offered his large hand to Natalie, and she took it eagerly.

“Bye bye!” she called, waving back at the two women.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Emilia asked, approaching Vera, who was still blushing. “We could’ve sent something actually useful! Oh my, that’s embarrassing…” She leaned her head on the blonde’s shoulder.

“But it is useful! Look at her!” The older Scatorccio pointed at her daughter, who was laughing out loud as she sped up the chair, having the man running after her. “She loved it. Thank you.”

“Aw, stop it!” Emilia said with a playful shove. “Want a drink?”

“Uh, I don’t—” Vera hesitated, taking a deep breath.

Four years, Vera. For Natalie.

“Do you have any juice?”

[...]

The reflection of her face in the water looked different from how she felt now. Her brows were thicker, her hair longer, and her eyes seemed tired. I look like Mom, she thought, a small smile tugging at her lips. But as she blinked for the first time in minutes, she saw the one in the water stare back in horror—lips parted, tear ducts already working.

Tears began to stream down her own cheeks.

If you asked Lottie what she was doing, crouched near the creek a couple of miles from her backyard, she wouldn’t have known what to say. She couldn’t even remember leaving her room, where she had been getting ready to meet Natalie.

Natalie.

Vera’s daughter was coming today. Lottie had asked her mom to help bake cookies and brownies, and her dad to help her pick out a pretty dress.

He chose a white, puffy one. It was brand new, clean, and pretty.

Was.

Now it was sinking into the brown, humid mud beneath her knees.

She leaned closer to the water, feeling its cold temperature wash over her. The little hairs on her body stood on end as it beckoned her. The sound came from below.

Come to me, child. Enter me, the river whispered in her ear.

It was the first time it had spoken coherently since she started paying attention to the sound no one else seemed to hear. Finally, it had talked to her.

She was deserving of hearing it.

Her palms began to sting from the pressure of her short, pink nails digging in. Her arms prickled as she lowered herself even more. It was right there, just beneath her nose. She was so close to finally seeing the one who whispered to her every night, the one that didn’t like planes or flying at all.

The tip of her nose brushed the surface of the water.

“Do you think it’s dead?” The weight that had pressed against the back of her head disappeared.

She turned towards the new voice, different from the previous one. Warmer.

A raccoon.

Big, curious greenish-blue eyes stared back at her. The animal leaned close to the water, mirroring Lottie’s position. A crooked paw was lifted while the other held the weight of its furry body. The water beneath it held a hint of red, droplets of blood seeping from its chest. Lottie could see its heart, beating rapidly. With each pulse, more blood mingled with the river, the viscous red liquid caressing her cheek as it flowed.

Her head began to throb. She closed her eyes for a moment.

“What?” Lottie mumbled, still trying to gather her senses and remember why she was there.

When she opened her eyes, she met the gaze of a pale girl with dark blonde hair in pigtails, wearing a gray cap. Stitches adorned her left eyebrow, and she wore the same curious expression as the raccoon.

When she opened her eyes, she met the gaze of a pale girl with dark blonde hair in pigtails, wearing a gray cap. Stitches adorned her left eyebrow, and she wore the same curious expression as the raccoon.

“The frog. I don’t think they can stay underwater for that long.” Brown eyes flicked back to the water, and Lottie’s reflection returned to normal. Looking closer, she noticed a small green body, one of its legs trapped beneath a rock.

“It’s dead.” Lottie forced herself to focus, pushing aside the sound of the river flooding her ears.

“Do you want to bring it back to the house? Your dad told me you kind of have a collection of dead animals.” The girl pushed herself up and stood.

“Bugs. I collect bugs.” Lottie glanced back at the girl, now settling into her chair after pulling her face away from the water. The rushing noise of the stream faded. “Dad told you that?” She laughed, her father always disapproving of this little interest her mother had passed down to her.

“Yeah, while we were looking for you. I think it’s pretty cool.” The girl, whom Lottie assumed was Natalie, smiled shyly. “By the way, what are you doing all the way out here? I almost fell twice; it’s too rocky.”

“I’m—uh—rocks. I was looking for cool rocks.” It wasn’t a total lie; she did have a couple of rocks in her right hand, though she didn’t remember picking them up. “For you.”

“Thanks! I love rocks.” The smile faded slightly. “Aw man, I didn’t bring you anything…” She frowned.

“It’s okay.” Lottie smiled, though she worried about how her dress was ruined. Mom would be furious. “Wanna see my bugs?” She stood up, patting her knees.

“Hell yeah!” Nat moved closer in her chair. “Hey, can you grab it for me, please?” She pointed at the water.

“The dead frog?”

“Mhm, I’m taking it home. Gonna keep it in a jar and get the bones later.” Natalie rose, gathering leaves to keep her clothes clean.

“Okay! Do you have any bones yet?” Lottie shook the water off the deceased amphibian and patted its back, murmuring, “Sorry, buddy.”

“Just three. One is my dead cat’s skull. His name was Socks. He was all sloppy and dirty.” Nat had fashioned a little leaf bed on a piece of tree bark where the frog lay. It was the first time they stood side by side, noticing the height difference—Nat was at least two inches taller, which felt great considering she was the shortest among her friends.  

“Oh! That’s nice. You have to show me one day.” Brown eyes sparkled with excitement. Her parents wouldn’t let her collect bones. ‘It’s dangerous,’ they said. ‘It’s gross.’ they said. Frustrated, she eventually let it go. But Nat was allowed, and Lottie really wanted to see what the blonde had. “I mean the bones! It’s not nice that your cat died.”

“It’s okay. I was just a kid. Can’t even remember much about him.” Nat shrugged, placing the frog on her lap as she returned to her chair. Big brown eyes lit up when she turned a button on. “Come, sit here. We can drive back together.” She patted her lap, and Lottie squealed in excitement, settling onto her right thigh. “You’ll have to control us, though. I’m kind of busy here.” She had her left hand- and broken arm, holding the casket as the right held the light brown skinned girl in place.

“That’s fine. And you’re still a kid, dummy!” Lottie laughed, guiding them back to the house.

“I meant like when I was younger! Ugh! Whatever.” The pale girl sighed but wore a smile. “Tell me more about your bugs.”

“Oh! Okay!” Lottie exclaimed. “Once, I found a Luna moth by the pool, and I think it was a female because the wings had this type of—”

[...]

Later that day, both girls begged their parents to let them have a sleepover, claiming they ‘just had so much to talk about’ and that ‘if Natalie went home, she could never come back, and Lottie would cry for days.’ They filled the air with dramatic pleas, determined to convince the adults.

Their parents didn’t need much convincing, especially when they found the two little girls feeding each other brownies on the kitchen floor, and later curled up on the couch watching a Barbie movie.

The two felt a sense of familiarity around each other, as if they were two halves of the same person.

Perhaps they had met in a past life,

or maybe not. Who cared?

They were just glad to have met in this one.

Chapter Text

Charlotte Matthews has never been good at the ‘making friends’ field. And she was okay with that, she never actually felt lonely. It was all fine while everyone just ignored her presence, bumping into her and not saying sorry or never picking her at school games. 

Really, all good. 

Until it wasn’t.

She was four, when she first got bullied. 

Summer, 2005

Campeche, Mexico

Some kids played hide and seek in the playground at the child care center. Running around, hiding behind bushes and screaming at eachother. 

Lottie was sitting at this wooden bench below a tree, looking at the others having fun. They didn’t ask her to join. 

It was fine.

A dark skinned boy ran in her direction, a smile on his face. Her heart skipped a beat. A hopeful smile threatened to grow on its own. Maybe they wanted her to play too. Maybe they were just shy to ask.

Maybe they liked her.

He stopped in front of her, hands behind his back. “Close your eyes.” He said. His accent was cute. It was the first time she ever heard one of them speak english. Being in Mexico with her parents has been pretty nice, she learned a new word everyday, people are lovely and the food is amazing. “¡Vamo! Cerrarlos!” 

So she did.

Giggles followed by a shush came from the little group he’d come running from. “Promise not to open. Now.” He said with a stifled laugh. 

“I promise.” Lottie crossed her heart. 

His steps sounded closer when she felt something moving in her hair- lots of things, actually. Then in her legs. More steps in her direction, and something was placed in her left hand, it also moved. The giggles got louder.

“Okay, you can open now.”

She opened her eyes just for them to be met by a handful of dirt. 

More giggles. 

As she wiped her face with her right hand, she saw her arms and legs covered in the same dirt that was stuck up her nose. There were worms all over her hair. She opened her mouth to say something, but closed as soon as she felt little legs climbing her left wrist. 

A Hercules Beetle. 

Male.

He was all big, and greenish-yellow, and beautiful . Climbing up her arm with all his majesty, little black paws carefully tracing his way up. 

She smiled, as her free - and dirty, hand reached the bug, delicately picking up the hard surface of his body to bring him closer to her face.

“Hi. I like your horns. Bet you are the strongest boy around.” She whispered to him, feeling one of his paws touch her nose. She giggled and all the mocking around her had stopped. 

She couldn’t stop the fast hand that harshly grabbed the bug out of her hands. A girl with short hair and bangs held him tight. “¿Te gusta eso?” She said throwing him in the air.

“Stop it!” She screamed, getting up to try and grab the bug out of the other girl’s hands. She dodged and threw the beetle to the boy behind Lottie. When Lottie turned around, he had one hand at each of the bug’s horns. “No! You’re going to hurt him!” She took a step closer but stopped when the kid lightly pulled his hands to opposite sides, hearing a tiny crack. “Please… Don’t do this.” The flood had started, overflowing the eyes and burning her cheeks.

“You are so weird, you know that?” A voice in her right said. 

“Yeah! Alexis told us she saw you talking to a tree the other day.” Another one, behind her. 

“What are you? Like a bruja? ” To her left. “Do the trees talk to you?” The voice mocked.

“You are hurting him… Please…” Her voice came out weak and her vision was so blurry, she wasn’t able to see much of what the boy had done. 

A crack . 

Hands were pulled apart.

He threw a piece to the side, holding the bigger one right in front of her face. Her heart sank.

“It’s just a bug, Charlotte.” The blurry beetle - now dead, was placed on the ground as one of the children approached with a big rock in both hands. She let it fall, smashing the bug. “Stop being such a freak.” Lottie dropped to her knees, crying and struggling to breathe while the others laughed at her misery. 

Later that day, mom gifted her a framed Atlas Beetle, saying she found him while walking around in the orchard she visited when in Thailand. ‘It died peacefully laying on a flower, dear. I thought of honoring its life by preserving its beauty here.’ 

So she slept with the bug for days, praying that the one who died before her eyes could - one day, forgive her for being a weak coward and who didn’t try harder to stop the children.

Charlotte didn’t feel like going to the child care center anymore, or traveling with her parents for work. 

So she stayed at one of her mothers friends' houses, Patricia Jones. She had a daughter, and she was really nice. 

Laura Lee was her first friend. 

Spring, 2006

Jones’ Residence

“And who is this one?” The two girls were sitting in front of an altar. The blonde one had a figure in her hands.

Lottie was fascinated by all the catholic imagery and tangible blind faith that house was surrounded by. Her parents never were the religious type, everything was new and beautiful to her eyes. 

“This is St. Ambrose. And that one is St. Anthony of Padua.” Laura Lee got up, placing the ceramic piece back in place. 

“And what do they do? Did…?” Lottie asked, touching the tiny words in the almost see-through page of the open bible. 

“Um- I don't know yet… Mum said I'll start taking catechism classes next year.” The pale face turned into a shade of pink. “For now, I just know their names.”

“What 's that?”

“Catechism?” The brunette noded. “It’s like school, but… for Jesus. Dad says it’s important to learn the story of your Lord and Savior, so we know where our faith comes from.” 

“Okay, just promise you'll tell me when you find out.” She reached her pinky out. 

“Promise.” Laura took it. Her hands were warm and firm.

“Girls, are you ready to go?” Patricia's head poked through the door. 

Laura Lee grabbed Lottie's hands, squeezing it once. It was her first time in a church and she wanted her to feel comfortable. Lottie squeezed back.

“Ready, mum!”

[...] 

The church looked very scary at first. All big and brutal in its gothic architecture, but as soon as the small girl in pigtails passed through the door, the feeling was replaced with awe. Her eyes were blessed by all its colorful windows, painted ceilings and hand carved wooden benches. It was all very magical to her eyes.

“We’re a bit late, it started already.” Laura Lee interlaced their arms. “Come!” Then she ran, dodging all the people on their way until they could see the altar. First line.

“It's so pretty-” Little hands covered her mouth, and ocean blue eyes stared at her. ‘Quiet!’, she mouthed, smiling at the face Lottie made. 

“[...] and He used them as a way of communicating to those who couldn't hear Him! He might as well use any of us here.” The priest said looking at the giant crucified Jesus at the center of the altar. “Who are we? What are we? What are we doing here? On earth. Do we have a purpose?” He stopped, looking at those sitting in front of him. At those who had faith. “The truth is: God has made us from his image. He loved us so much, He gave us the honor of living, seeing, and sensing. He gave us a mouth to speak! We are nothing but His servants, we’re here to follow His commands, to preach His word! We are pieces of the same being, and we have- We must, listen to Him.” His eyes, darting through all the faces, landed on Lottie. “Remember: there is no such thing as a coincidence. Everything has a meaning, everything could be a calling, a warning. You just need to give in” He stared into the girl's eyes. She felt a shiver run down her spine. “Let Him in[...]”

[...] 

“So? What did you think?” The older man that looked so much like Laura Lee asked, opening the door to his white Chevrolet Malibu 2004. 

“I liked it. It was just kind of weird when the Priest looked at me…” She shrunk in the backseat. 

“Oh don't worry, darling!” Patricia laughed, reaching over the girl to click her daughter’s seatbelt on and then Lottie’s. “He does that.” She closed the backseat door and walked over to the passenger seat, getting in the car. 

“You got scared about the ‘let Him in’ part, didn’t you?” Laura Lee smiled, and for a second, just a second , her teeth looked stained in red. Bloody. “ I got scared the first time too. ” She whispered then covered her mouth, coughing a little. As she pulled her hand back, Lottie could see a glimpse of red there too. 

“Y-your hands-” She took it. 

“What?” 

And there was nothing. Completely fine. Clean. 

“Nothing… I thought-” Her teeth and mouth were also normal, free of any blood. What was that? “I-It’s nothing…” She let go of the blonde’s hands, flashing her a quick smile and looking forward. Deep breath, she could feel her hands starting to shake.

“Okay…?” Laura Lee frowned.

“Whenever you feel comfortable coming back, you can, kid.” Patrick fixed the rear view, winking at her through it.

“Mhm, thank you Mr. Jones.” She looked at him through the mirror, and forced a smile. 

All the way back to their house was odd. At least for Lottie. The family sang along with some songs and joked around, but the only thing the brown eyes could focus, was the skeletal reflection of Laura Lee in the mirror. 

Lottie's parents came back home and picked her up from the Jones’ a couple of days later. She didn't say anything about what she saw. Laura Lee was fine, healthy, at the ideal weight for a six year old. Lottie was just confused, and seeing things. 

Except she wasn't. 

The smaller Jones started coughing more and more as the weeks passed. She didn't feel like eating, or playing anymore. She was always tired. 

And then the teeth got stained red, and hands were met with blood more often. 

Laura Lee Jones got diagnosed with tuberculosis later that spring.

Winter, 2006

The small figure ran quickly through the frozen meadow, paws burning from the contact with the fresh snow. Its little lungs fought to breathe the sharp freezing air, head getting dizzy by the second. But it had to try. Try and find somewhere warm to stay, anywhere but a snowy ground to die.

It saw a glimpse of light on the other side of this creek, jumped from slippery rock to slippery rock so as not to get wet by the flowing stream water, climbing up the small rocky hill. The light came from this wooden construction in the vast white covered field.

An opened shed.

Furry legs guided it through the door, it was still cold inside, but nothing like the harsh winter in the woods where it came from. There was a pile of fabric on the corner where it layed down. 

A humming came from behind one of the shelves, and the animal tried to hide somewhere, but it was too late. It was seen. 

“Oh my God!” The woman exclaimed. “Hi… Who are you? What are you doing here, darling?” She reached a hand but it growled, so she pulled back. “My love? Can you come here in the back for a second?”

“Coming darling!” A deeper voice said a bit far. “Did you find the tree lights baby? I have those white ones here, but Lot likes the colorful- Oh! Hello dog… Wolf…?” A tall man appeared- holding a big box full of Christmas decorations, behind the woman crouching in front of the dog. 

“Is this a wolf?” She frowned, looking at him.

He shrugged. “What are you doing here in this cold weather, buddy? Who are you?” 

“I just asked the same thing.” She smiled. 

“We’re not getting an answer, are we?” He laughed looking at the wide eyes of the dog. 

“I don't know… Maybe if we try a little harder.” She jokes.

“Woof woof! Woof woof woof?” The greenish-brown eyes looked dead serious while the man barked. 

“Okay stop!” The woman laughed, slapping the taller one’s leg.

“I deeply apologize if I said something offensive Mr. Wolf-dog, my ‘doggian’ is a little rusty.” He chuckled. “What do we do about him? We can't leave him here, nor just let him freeze to death outside.”

“Well…” Both pairs of eyes rested on the little shivering body. 

[...]

Since Laura Lee got sick, Lottie had been pretty lonely. Her mom, nor Patricia let the girls see each other, saying the blonde was too dangerous to be near Charlotte. But the little one couldn’t understand. Laura Lee was never dangerous, she was her friend . Besides, it was just a little flu - that's what her parents said to her, they didn’t have the heart to tell the truth -, it couldn't be so bad. ‘I can wear a mask!’ she said. But still, it's been almost a year since she last saw the girl.

When her parents got back from the shed, they were acting really weird, saying she should not go there. "It's filled with spiders’, her mom said, receiving an ‘Yeah, and… lizards…? Lizards.’ from her dad.

Lizards and spiders? Coexisting in the same place? In winter? Okay…

She didn’t have the time to contest them because they had found the Christmas lights, the colorful ones. 

Their tree was even bigger than the previous year one, bright green with a thick trunk, it was so tall, it almost reached the mezzanine floor. Mom and dad bought the prettiest Christmas baubles, they were all big and shiny. She had to stand on Malcolm's shoulder to reach the top of the tree, placing a golden star there, it was almost as big as her head.

Dad and her made some wreaths by hand, using twigs and some of her mothers dried flowers to decorate it; they embroidered their names on the green and red stockings and filled it with candy; and finally, they baked a gingerbread house and four little gingerbread men to live in it.

“Daddy, why are there four of us? It's just me, you and mom.” The confused little face was all covered in white flour, hands sticky from the dough. 

“Uh…” His wife's eyes widened in his direction, what are you doing? . He gulped. “Oops! I might have made an extra one, by accident.” 

“Can I eat it then?” The little baker smiled. 

“You know what, baby? We should leave it there, right? Since it's already… there.” Em held back a laugh. Malcolm was horrible at keeping secrets and organizing surprises. “You can eat the icing, tho.” He smiled weirdly.

“Really? Cool!” And the kid dipped her whole hand in the icing mix, shoving into her mouth right after. 

“No, wait! Not like that!”

“Charlotte!”

[...] 

Christmas morning was filled with hugs and beautiful presents to one another. Malcolm got Emilia this purple dress along with some shiny, expensive jewelry and five new framings for her bugs. 

“You got me new framings?” She smiled wide, touching the delicate engravings and golden corners. “You hate my bugs…” Eyes laid on her husband. 

“But I love you, so…” He shrugged, smiling then wiggling the thick eyebrows charmingly. “I know they’re important to you.” He touched her face, leaving a kiss on her forehead. 

Emilia, in turn, got him a painting she made herself. One thing about Malcolm Matthews, is that he was the biggest nerd around, completely obsessed with Lord Of the Rings, Star Wars and all these sorts of stuff.

“Oh- Oh!? Oh!” He said as he ripped every layer of wrapping around the big frame. His mouth was wide open as big eyes almost popped out of his eye sockets. “Em… Em! Oh my god, Em!” 

“Yes, darling?” She laughed at his excitement. 

“It's me! It’s me!” He pointed at himself, while bouncing on the couch. His smile was so big, it could rip his cheeks apart. “You drew me-” 

“Let me see, daddy!” Tiny hands reached his leg. 

“- as an Elf!!” He turned the frame around, so Lottie could see. “It’s daddy, right here! Mommy drew daddy!!” He placed the painting on the couch and grabbed his wife’s face, kissing it all over. “Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I love you so much!” She laughed, her hands placed in his forearms. 

The rest of the presents under the tree were all Lottie’s. She got dresses, assorted toys, a bunch of coloring books, and a lot more stuff she couldn’t even remember. But she left everything behind at the sight of one last huge box, the one her parents struggled to bring back home from the shed. 

The box was moving.

“What is it?” The little one whispered to her dad.

“I don’t know. Guess you’ll have to open and see.” He pressed his lips together. 

So she gathered all her courage and slowly walked at the wrapped, moving cube. Before she could touch it, the box tilted, falling down and having its top opened. 

From inside, a black snout poked out, smelling its surroundings. Two big brown orbs gazed at the little girl, she could hear the sound of its tail hitting the inside of the box.

Her parents got her a dog.

Fall, 2008. 

“Dear diary, 

Last week I made a friend. Her name is Natalie, and she have has the most beautiful hair in the hole whole world! It is long and shiny and smells so so so good I wanted to eat it. She is really pretty too, her eyes are big and they change colors like a camaleon. She has a camaleon trapped in her eyes, I think. 

She really liked my bugs and didn’t get scared when I showed them. 

I like her. 

I also miss Laura Lee, she also likes my bugs. Mom and dad won't let me visit her :(

Anyways, Patty is being weird right now so I'm going to go! 

Bye, I'll come back as soon as I can.

xoxo, Lottie.”

“Patty! I’m trying to write here!” Lottie laughed as the dog nudged her right arm again. She was doing that for a while now. “What is it, girl?” 

Patty, contrary to what Malcolm called her, was a female. She was a black Border collie, with the fluffiest fur the Matthews had ever touched. Very active, and in that moment, annoying dog. 

Big black restless eyes stared at her as the dog whined, her tail between furry legs.

Bark.

Patty nudged her again, and delicately bit the green sweater, pulling it. She stood up and walked over to the bedroom door. 

Bark.

“What? You want me to follow you?” Lottie put her diary aside and stood up.

Bark. 

‘Okay, girl. Lead the way.” 

And so she ran. Patty ran downstairs and opened the back door, Lottie tried to follow as the dog disappeared in the flowery field, only her head poking out from time to time, as she jumped to gain speed. The Border ran right past the shed, towards the rocky path entering the woods, she dodged the trees, jumping over their protruding roots on the ground and running right through the bushes. 

The girl tried her best to follow the animal, but her legs were short and she was getting tired. She was just a kid and couldn’t match the pace of a dog whose breed was created to herd on large fields and could run up to 30 miles per hour. So she stopped and tried to guess where the dog was going. Patty turned right on a big tree.

The creek.

Lottie turned around and ran where her dog might be going. She couldn’t stop in time when she reached the rocky path, her shoes slipped and she rolled downhill, stopping at the edge of a hole. She laughed, patting the leaves off the clothes as she tried to sit down properly. Her body was sore, but she was ok. 

Patty was sitting by the hole too, tongue out as she breathed heavily. 

Bark.

Lottie looked at the dog and then at the hole. It was big enough to fit a medium wolf, not deep at all. If the brunette were to stand inside it, the ground would reach her knees. 

There was no dirt around it. Just the hole. 

“Is that what you wanted to show me?” The girl said breathlessly, and the dog whined again. 

Bark. Looking at the hole. 

So Lottie looked inside once more, realizing there were some bones inside. And a dog skull. One missing front tooth.

“Oh, the bones?” She reached inside and picked up the skull. 

Bark. 

“That’s so cool girl!” She analyzed it. It was the exact size of Patty’s. “Did you know? Nat has a cat skull at her house! Do you think she’s gonna like this one?” The skull was turned to the dog who tilted her head. “I think so too. How did you find this?” 

No bark. 

The dog got up and started to walk up the little hill. “Not telling me, huh?” The girl followed Patty out the trail, bringing her new piece home. She was going to give it to Natalie.

The day finally came. The day she’s been dreaming about since they got back to the house and was shown the whole collection of deceased insects; since they drove around the terrain on her mobility scooter and lay on the flowery field, trying to find images on the clouds; since they stayed up all night because of the amount of sugar that was consumed earlier.

Since they last said their goodbyes. 

Since that day, Natalie couldn't shut up about the brown-eyed girl, and her family, and her cool fairy house, and her wolf looking dog, and her fluffy hair, and, and, and…

But unfortunately, even though she was going to see Lottie again, it wasn’t in the best circumstances. 

Her dog, Patty, got sick, really sick. Mom said she was biting everything, even her own tail, was hiding from Lottie and couldn’t play as much as she did before. The brunette was pretty worried, so mom is taking Nat - and some more company, to try and take her mind off things.

“Okay, guys! We’re at one of my friend’s houses.” Natalie had one hand on her waist, standing in front of the gate that led to the trail for Lottie's house. “Her name is Charlotte, and-”

“Since when have you had any friends other than us?”  Taissa raised an eyebrow, crossing her arms. 

“Wha- Since two weeks ago, Tai.” She opened her mouth a couple times with her brows pinched. “And I have… friends! A bunch of them, actually” 

“Your mom, and your grandma?” Misty tried to hold a laugh. Nat frowned.

“Misty, nobody your age ever came to your birthday party before you met us. What are you saying?” Shauna defended. 

“Well, for some reason, some kids are not interested in birds. So I had to invite some of my ornithology classmates…” She blinked. 

“You are weird-” Taissa pointed at the curly blonde. 

“Shh!! That 's it!” Natalie shushed them. “That’s what I don't want to happen. Her dog is really sick, so it’s a sad day. We need to cheer her up! She doesn’t need all this.” She gestured to all of them and  heard a mumble. ‘I don’t even know her…’ coming from her left. “Then you can grab your bike and go back home, Tai!” 

“No! I want to stay, I-” She sighed. “I’m sorry.”

“Great. So…?” 

“Let’s cheer her up.” The curly haired one said in a dejected tone.

“Good. Ready?” 

It had been almost a week since Patty began to hide in the corners of the house, drool all over the place and refuse to drink water. Lottie felt bad for not being able to help her, but every chance she got, she stayed beside her to let her know that she was loved, and everything would be okay. 

It was getting hard to see her dog like that - not that she saw much of Patty lately, she has been hiding somewhere in the shed since Malcolm tried to take her to the vet, she almost bit him. Vera didn’t let her come with her to try and feed the dog, saying that, even though Patty wasn’t aggressive with her, it still was dangerous to be around the dog. Besides, the vet was coming that day to take a look at her, so it would be best if she wasn’t around.

So that day when Natalie was coming over, she decided to give Patty a break, and actually do something else other than lingering beside the agitated dog. 

And she did. 

Turned out that Nat had brought along some of her friends over and they were really fun. One of them kept walking around and pointing out at different birds she spotted, telling her - and anyone who listened, really - about their behavior, the difference of their feathering, their diet and something about mating. Lottie listened to every word.

The brunette one got fascinated by her parents' mini library, walking around the small room with glossy eyes; spoiling some stories she had read; talking about some plays she was rehearsing for the next month and how Debrah and Ryan - her parents, teached literature at a public university, and that's was why she knew so much about at least eighty-five percent of the books in there. 

The third one didn’t seem to like Lottie very much, she only had talked to her once - when they’d arrived, and ignored her for the rest of the evening. She tried to talk to her, but the girl was quick to cut her out, or flash a fake smile and go away. But it was okay, she was used to it. 

She constantly caught Nat looking over to them with a frown, so she decided to stop approaching the girl. 

They were running around the field when Lottie spotted Emilia and Vera talking to the vet doctor. He had a serious face, while her mother was covering her mouth. She looked sad. The younger Matthews started to walk over to them when she felt a touch in her arm.

“Hey…” Taissa had a hand on Lottie’s wrist, she looked embarrassed. “Sorry I treated you badly. Nat talked to me and- Uhm-” She breathed in. ”Nat is my best friend and I was afraid that she liked you more than she liked me…” She pressed her eyes. “But you were really nice to me and I’ve been a jerk, I’m sorry.” 

“It’s okay.” Lottie smiled. “I'm sorry for stealing Natalie… I didn’t know I was doing that…”

“No, it’s fine. We can share! I already shared her with them, it's not gonna hurt to share with one more.” She pointed at the girls spinning the blonde, who had a scarf covering her eyes. “Oh, by the way, we’re about to play Blind man’s bluff, wanna join?” 

Lottie smiled big. 

Someone actually asked her to play with them.

“Yes!”

[...]

After the girls went home, Lottie felt so tired that she hopped out of the shower straight to her bed. She forgot to ask her parents what was wrong with Patty.

In the middle of her sleep, she felt a cold nudge on her forehead. As she opened her eyes, Patty was standing beside her bed, eyes bright and active as they were before, tail wagging again. 

“Patty?!” She whispered, trying to touch the fur, but, for some reason she couldn’t. “Do you feel better?”  

Bark. 

She felt the weight on her chest go away. Patty was fine .

She looked happy. 

Under her dog's gaze, she fell back asleep, feeling one last nudge on her head before completely dozing off.

[...]

“Mom, have you seen Patty? She looked so much better last night! Maybe today she wants to run with me after my lessons.” She said excitedly walking into the kitchen. Both of her parents looked devastated. 

“Darling, I’m so sorry…” Her mothers eyes began to flood.

“Mom? Dad, what happened? Where’s Patty?” Her voice started to crack. 

“Baby girl…” His lip quivered. “She... She passed away…’

No! Patty was alive! She slept in my room all night!

Her mother got up and held the static figure of her daughter, who had her gaze lost somewhere. 

She couldn’t have died… It is a bad dream. All a bad dream. 

She closed her teary eyes.

I’m gonna wake up at any moment.

But she didn’t. It wasn’t a dream.

Unfortunately, the previous night was the last of the young dog's life. 

Patty had rabies.

Malcolm felt bad about having to tell Lottie that her dog probably had been bitten by a raccoon, and had to be euthanized. So he waited until she went to sleep and took the little angel to the vet. He stayed there, holding her paw while repeating to her, ‘I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…’

Later that day, they had a little funeral for the dog. Mom chose a place to bury the corpse. She had dug a small hole next to the creek.

It was big enough to fit a medium wolf, not deep at all. If Lottie were to stand inside it, the ground would be at knee height.  

Natalie and Vera were there too. The blonde held tightly a brunette, crying mess. Repeating that everything was going to be okay. Over and over again. 

“I’m here.” She whispered to the head nuzzled in her neck.

Charlotte hadn't realized at the time. She didn't feel the minuscule slit in the middle of her chest, growing. 

And she also didn’t realize how the dog skull with a missing tooth had disappeared from under her bed.

“The cords of death entangled me, the anguish of the grave came over me; I was overcome by distress and sorrow. Then I called on the name of the LORD: “LORD, save me!” The LORD is gracious and righteous; our God is full of compassion. The LORD protects the unwary; when I was brought low, he saved me.”

Psalm 116:3

Chapter Text

Fall, 2009

Halloween evening.

Pink and blue feathers struggled to stay in place. Every time the girl moved it looked crooked somehow. It was getting on her nerves. 

“You need to stay still if you want my help.” The older’s hand was trying to fix the accessory on the younger’s waist. “Is it too tight?” The girl shook her head.

“Sorry! I’m excited. It’s my first time trick-or-treating!” She smiled, looking at the dirty blonde concentrated face in the mirror. “What’s she dressed as? She didn’t tell me and I know you know what it is. Can you tell me? Pretty please?” Dark lashes batted, while a lower lip covered in pink gloss hung on a pout. 

“Lot, it’s a secret! I can't tell you.” Vera laughed. It was the third time Lottie tried to convince her to spill what Natalie’s costume was, but her kid made her promise by her life that she wouldn’t tell the girl. So her lips were sealed.

The younger Matthews, in turn, decided to be a princess for that Halloween.  

Not any princess, tho.

She wanted to be Rosella from her favorite Barbie movie: The Island Princess.

So there Vera was, trying her hardest to fix the feathers on the back of Rosella’s dress, while Lottie’s parents got ready and helped Natalie with her secrecy. 

“Aha! I think I got it!” She took a step back to take a look. “Alright, jump!” And the girl did, and shook her hips, and spun around. The piece stayed in place. Vera Scatorccio, you did it!

“Oh wow! Thank you, Auntie Vera!” The girl ran towards her nanny and hugged her waist. “I love you.” She mumbled against the taller stomach. 

Vera was caught off guard.

In a bit over than a year working for the Matthews and being around Lottie everyday- even after checking every corner of the little girl’s room, searching for monsters every night; playing with the girl until her back begged for a break; and even letting the girl sleep curled up with her in the guest room, since she didn’t want to sleep in her own after Patty passed away,- It was the first time she ever said those words. 

‘Auntie’ Scatorccio’s heart fluttered, she hadn’t realized how much she loved that girl until that moment. How much the girl, and her parents meant to her in so little time. First they were strangers, then bosses and employees, but now? Now they were friends. 

The two families often went out for dinners, amusement parks, the movies or even cheap crappy restaurants. 

Emilia once wanted to try curly fries for the first time, so Vera wanted to show her what kind of stuff she grew up with. They drove all the way to South Carolina because ‘that's where the good stuff is’. She was a little apprehensive about bringing such an elegant woman to the shit hole she grew up in, but Emilia loved it. She thought it was delicious- even though extremely oily, and even asked for the recipe when they were leaving- which she, unfortunately, didn’t get. 

She felt really safe around them, and they seemed to feel the same way.

Her eyes watered as she looked down to the big, deer-like eyes glowing and gazing at her with so much affection, it had thickened the air around her. Vera loved her too. 

“Baby girl…” Hands caressed the blonde wig the girl was wearing. “I love you so much…” She pushed the princess a little so she could crouch to look at her. Pale hands in contrast with olive skin as she held Lotties face. “You are so special to me, you know that right?” Vera smiled at the child. “You, your parents… You are living right here.” The hand moved to her chest. “Me and Nat are really grateful for meeting you, and for having the honor to be allowed to watch you grow.” 

Small tanned hands wiped off the tear trail of the older’s cheek, only to lay a kiss there right after.

A sniff came from the door. 

“Sorry! I’m so sorry.” His eyes were wet and he straightened his posture, standing by the pink door frame. “I didn’t mean to hear or interrupt, it's just- Nat is ready…” He tapped the tears away. 

“Yay!” Lottie pulled away gently and ran to the bedroom door. “Nat, can I see you now, please?” She shouted, poking her head out the hallway.

“Yes!” An excited Natalie said, so Lottie ran downstairs to meet the girl.

Vera got up, smiling while wiping the remaining tears off her face. She quickly checked herself in the mirror, noticing her hat was crooked and that she still didn’t have her fake tooth poking out. The mole was just right. 

Vera was dressed as Nanny McPhee. Lottie 's idea. 

“You are really special to us as well, you know?” Malcolm nudged her arm as she left the room. 

She smiled. 

[...]

‘ Your costume is awesome! Everyone is gonna be so impressed! ’ Emilia had said as soon as the little girl stepped out of the bathroom and posed with her sword. She had fake blonde dreads - with beads in the ends, attached to her hair and a red bandana covering half of her forehead; Smudged eyeliner, an ‘X’ on her left cheek that Malcolm helped her draw and a fake braided goatee decorated with beads as well. 

For the clothes, she was wearing some old looking leather pants, a cream colored blouse with a navy blue vest over it, some pieces of fabric hanging out to give a messy look to the outfit and a wide brown belt with a baldric. 

She felt amazing.

“You’re a pirate!” Lottie said as soon as she stepped in the living room.

“I’m not just a pirate! I’m Captain Jack Sparrow! The coolest man alive!” Natalie posed again with her sword, smiling smugly. “Look I even have a scar!” Wiggled her eyebrows, the scar would be barely noticeable, if it wasn‘t for the lack of hair splitting it in half. 

“I don’t think he’s alive, or has a scar, Nat…” The smaller quickly tried to console her friend as she saw her happy face drop. “But, hey! You have one, and you’re not even a pirate. That means you’re way cooler than him!”

“I’m not cooler than him…” She pouted, dropping her sword on the wooden floor.

“You are! At least to me, you are.” Lottie got closer, picking up the metal weapon. “Also, prettier.” She touched the fake mustache, making the other smile.

“Handsomer! I am a man today!” Natalie tried to deepen her high pitched voice. “Oh! And you are a princess! We can pretend that my crew and I kidnapped you in exchange for gold!” 

“Oh… I wanted to be part of your crew…” The brunette whispered.

“It’s okay! You can be my pirate princess, then!” She placed her leather pirate hat on the smaller head and side hugged the princess. 

“Okay! Pirate and… Pirate?” Sweeney Todd entered the room followed by Mrs. Lovett and Nanny McPhee. “Let the scavenger hunt begin!” He had one hand on his waist and the other pointing at the door. The girls stared at him with a confused look. “Well, it’s not an actual- I meant the candy- We-” He sighed. “Let’s just- Go trick or treating…”

[...]

As they arrived at Forest Hill, the Princess and Pirate ran towards two little figures: another princess, wearing a green dress, and a masked girl wearing a blood stained, blue coverall, holding a plastic knife.

“Tai, you look beautiful! And you have the frog too, this is so nice!” The pirate princess said hugging the girl.

“Lot, you are blonde! You know what we can do?” Taissa jumped in excitement. “Do you wanna be my Lottie? You are a blonde princess and I’m Tiana, so we can be Charlotte and Tiana, right!? I mean, your name is Charlotte already. How cool is that?”

“That’s right! I would love to be your Charlotte!” She smiled. “My dress is blue, tho…” 

“Oh it’s okay-”

“I thought you were my pirate princess…” Natalie Sparrow crossed her arms, looking angrily at the two princesses.

“Uhm- I am Charlotte The Pirate Princess! I can be both of yours…” Brown eyes looked at both girls like she was watching a ping-pong match.

“I don’t wanna share my prince-” 

“Ah! Beware! I’m gonna murder you!” Michael Myers attacked her from behind. 

“Misty!” Jack Sparrow laughed at the girl pretending to stab her multiple times. “Get your knife out of my face!” 

“How did you know it was me?” Misty stopped her movements and took a step back. She sounded upset.

“Your name is written right here.” The pirate pointed at the name tag with ‘Quigley’ embroidered on it.

“Oh man! I forgot to switch…” She ripped the name tag off, attaching another one with ‘Myers’ on it, this time.

The streets of New Jersey were packed. Children in every costume imaginable spread from corner to corner. But in the middle of the street, stood this figure. All the other kids with their parents walked right past it, but it didn’t move a muscle. 

Its face was kind of silver colored, its yellowish teeth were big and without any skin to cover them - or the whole face, it had long, uneven bunny ears and large eyes - that lack irises or even pupils at all, that stared at the girl in the blonde wig. 

Lottie was paralyzed. 

No one else around her seemed to care about the creature. Maybe she was the only one seeing it. 

It tilted its head. 

And took a step. 

Getting closer and closer by the second, dodging excited children and their tired parents. Lottie closed her eyes.

It will go away. Breathe.

Then she opened them. 

It had vanished.

Her body had finally decided to give her back control of it, so she took a deep breath and blinked a couple times. It’s gone. 

As her head turned to face the girls, she was met by the figure, inches away from her face. Breathing heavily. 

Her heart stopped for a second.

“ Hello, Charlotte.” Its voice sounded raspy and low. She felt her legs shaking as the creature raised its hands to its own face, pulling it up. “Oof! It’s hard to breathe in this thing!”

“S-shauna…” Her voice came out weak and she felt a little dizzy.

“Hi! Did I scare you?” The girl in the creepy bunny costume smiled. 

The princess laughed as she recovered her senses and realized what was happening. “Yeah, you did!” She put a hand on the bunny’s shoulder to steady her wobbly self. “I think I’m gonna pass out.” 

“Oh my gosh, no!” Shauna laughed hard, placing one covered hand on the smaller shoulder and the other on her sides, just in case she was serious about passing out. “I’m sorry.” 

“Shauna what is this?” Captain Jack Sparrow asked, poking the mask ear. 

The bunny sighed. “Stop it! I’m Fr-”

“Frank, from Donnie Darko!” A scream came from behind Lottie. “That’s a good one Shauna!”

As they all turned around, they were met by a girl - Boy? Person? Lottie couldn’t tell-, poorly painted all over in orange, wearing a white long sleeve button up and pants, a -also white, cape and something that looked like a sock with holes on the sides - where two black tipped ears came out-, on their head. 

Is this a fox?

“Who are you? How do you even know my name?” The bunny’s face got completely serious, staring down at the… thing?

“What do you mean ‘who are you’? Its Van!” She opened her arms harshly. 

“Oh my God, Van! Who are you supposed to be?” Natalie guffawed leaning on Michael Myers. 

“I’m Ash… From Fantastic Mr. Fox…” She sounded frustrated. “Nobody is guessing my costume today…” Lower lip hanging in a pout and arms were crossed.

“Oh… Okay…” The pirate said, flashing the girl a quick smile. Ash sighed looking down. 

“I- I like your costume, Van…” Tiana had some pink on her cheeks.

“Thanks, Tai!” The fox’s eyes dropped from one princess to another. “I don’t think I know who you are. Hi! I’m Van.” She waved. “Vanessa Palmer.”

“Hi… I’m Lottie.” The blonde princess smiled shyly. “Hm, I like your ears.” 

“M-mine?" The princess nodded. "Thanks, I like your… feathers.” She smiled big. 

“Really? It was a little hard to keep them in place but, uh- You know…” Lottie shrugged.

Taissa sighed loudly, stomping her feet. “Van, come! Let’s go treat-or-treating.” She walked past Lottie and grabbed the redhead’s hands. The other girls were about to follow when she turned around. “Just me and you.” She stared down at the other princess with a snobbish look. 

And they walked away. Van waved them goodbye as she was dragged to the other side of the street. 

“Okay…?” Lottie felt her eyes sting a little. Did she do something wrong? 

“Well, guys!” Natalie said, grabbing her princess’s hands, trying to mimic Taissa’s voice. “We too shall begin our trick-or-treating!” She flipped her hair back. “Come on, everybody!” All the girls laughed at the impression, holding hands with one another.

That night, Captain Jack Sparrow, Rosella- The Pirate Princess of the Island, Michael Myers and Frank - The bunny, got almost two pounds of candy each. 

Their parents had to hide them away for months.

Fall, 2009

Thanksgiving day.

“Mommy! I’m ready, let's go!” Brown furry boots restlessly paced around, deer eyes glanced at the tall grandfather clock from time to time. She was getting anxious. They needed to go!

Her father walked out the kitchen with a pumpkin pie in hand, one of the dishes the family made to bring along to the reunion at Dora Scatorccio’s house. 

“Honey, you need to practice your patience!” Her mother came not much later- holding two casseroles full of stuffed mushrooms they harvested in the woods that morning -, blowing some pieces of hair that escaped her bun, from her face.

“I know, I just don’t want us to be late!” She quickly followed her parents outside to get the things in the car. “You know? Nat told me that her nonna doesn’t like people that are not punctual.” 

“Okay little girl! First of all: We are punctual.” Malcolm said, closing the car trunk and walking over to her. “Second of all: We are leaving now. You can finally get in the car.” He patted her head and opened the back door. Lottie squealed and climbed the tall car, sitting in the middle seat so as to be between her parents. He clicked her seat belt and got in the driver's seat, starting the car and driving off to the Scatorccio’s residence.

“Oh no! I forgot Magdalene!” Tiny hands covered an also tiny mouth.

“No, you didn’t!” Emilia reached her bag and handed a blonde doll to her daughter in the back seat. “You were so excited, I knew you would forget her.”

“Thank you mommy!” The kid smiled, hugging the plastic body.

Lottie was overjoyed by the possibility of knowing more about Natalie’s life. Seeing the blonde’s baby pictures, the room she slept in, her toys- and also the bones, the clothes in her wardrobe… Everything. 

Especially, meeting her huge family. 

Something about Charlotte - and the Matthews in general, is that she doesn’t have a big family. Never had. Emilia was an only child growing up, Daiyu and Manaaki Hira decided to have kids a bit late in their lives, which led them to pass away before their daughter got pregnant. As for Malcolm, he was the youngest of three brothers, all living abroad and ignoring his existence since the time he was born to when Peter Matthews got deathly ill, before even meeting his newborn granddaughter

The girl had never felt the warm embrace of a grandparent, but that day she would. She would meet Dora, and all the other Scatorccio folks. Natalie had a big family, and she was basically part of Lottie’s, so maybe they would see her as one of them too. 

The tingling, light feeling grew on her lungs, making the butterflies on her stomach flutter around. Pure bliss. 

She knew this feeling, she had felt it before. 

When she met Laura Lee’s family. 

Before she got sick.

Laura Lee.

Her first friend, who now, couldn’t open her mouth without staining sheets red. The one whose legs were so weak, she couldn’t leave the bed. The one who couldn’t see her parents other than by the big glass window of her hospital room.

The one Lottie saw get sick, before she did. 

The butterflies hit the bottom of her insides. Could she have warned them? Why didn’t she? Her lungs seemed to have stopped working on its own, she had to force the air in and out. Did Laura ever get sick before Lottie started visiting? In the bottom of her throat, she felt a grab, feet stomping on her lungs to help with the climb. It was getting hard to force the air in. Was it her? She did that? Claws dug on the soft thin layer of muscle on her trachea. Maybe, she would be fine if it wasn’t for her. Finally, fingers reached her larynx, forcing it to open. She locked her teeth.

The streets were calm, it was sunny, the wind was blowing the tree leaves and her parents seemed to be having a good conversation on the front. She wanted to call for them, she wanted them to look at her. To look at the lump on her throat, to help her breathe.

Stop.

She could hear the ringing on her ears growing louder, the poor little heart struggled to keep pumping blood to her oxygenless brain. 

Natalie.  

She fell out of the tree on the same day her mother got hired. The same day Lottie entered her life.

Stop.

Hands were abusing the plastic body of her doll, synthetic blonde hair being locked in a tight grip. Vera gifted her that doll. Natalie had one as well. Brown haired.

Lottie managed to close her eyes as the car stopped at the red light. Two images flashed behind her eyelids. One, of the curious raccoon on the creek that evening, the one that bled on the water; and the other of Natalie, in the same position as the animal. Same open wound on the chest, viscous red gushing on the river. 

No. Not Natalie. 

Green light. A foot touching the pedal. 

Stop!

She didn’t notice when the claws reached the back of her teeth, punching to get it open, to be released. So when she finally opened her mouth, the desperate scream reverberated in the tight space inside the car, finally getting the attention of her parents.  

Finally getting the car to stop.

“Charlotte!?” Emilia looked back with wide eyes as the creature got out of her daughter's insides.

“Charlotte, please! What is this?” Her father ignored the honking from the cars behind them, as he let go of the steering wheel to touch the shaking olive legs. “Baby, talk to daddy…” The yellow car overtook them at high speed, the old man driving it reached out his left arm to flip the family off. “Are you in pai-” 

A crash.

The yellow car was smashed between a convenience store wall and a concrete mixer truck. There was blood all around and the old man’s arm was hanging out the window. 

Lottie could finally breathe.

[...] 

“[...] Mal, it could’ve been us smashed between that truck!” Emilia whispered downstairs. She leaned against the counter, arms crossed.

“I know, but it was just a coincidence!” Malcolm pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Why can’t you accept that she saved us?” She asked, opening her arms. “She can be special.”

“What do you want us to do, Em? Pretend that our daughter isn’t sick?!” He walked over to the mini bar and poured himself a dose of whiskey.

“Maybe it’s not a sickness! There’s something about her. I can feel it.” Long legs walked over to her husband and her hands took the drink off his hands. She drank it all.

“Baby…” Malcolm sighed, placing his hands on the woman's tense shoulders. “She has always been like that… Lottie has been staring at trees for hours since she was two and we- We’ve been ignoring it. Trying to believe that it's normal for a kid to whisper things around the house, or even getting confused about things that we’ve never done or said to her.” The free hand gently grabbed the empty glass and placed it on the marble behind him. 

“I- It's just the way she is…” Her voice came out weak.

“It is not, darling… I know you don't want to believe it, but something can be wrong with our daughter…” 

“Honey, I-” Em looked at her feet.

“It's just a psychiatrist. If they say there is nothing wrong with her, we can do whatever spiritual thing you want, huh? How about it?” Fingers lifted the chin in front of him. “It’s our responsibility, Emilia. We can't just let her keep suffering like that…”

“Alright… But as soon as they say it’s nothing, we’re bringing Charlotte to Mother Gouyen!” She nuzzled her head on the slope of his neck, hugging his waist.

“We will, I promise.” Malcolm rounded his arms around his wife’s shoulder and sighed. Lottie was sleeping peacefully upstairs after the long day. 

Or at least they thought she was. 

She felt the cold of the night hitting her body as pointy rocks dug on the skin of her bare foot. Creek flowing furiously in front of her, Patty’s gave to her right. 

The sound of the water angrily running down flooded her ears again, but not harshly this time. It was calming, beautiful. The grove across the creek was being bathed by the moonlight, owls sang to the big round rock floating in the sky. Standing on the other side, there was a deer - with thick fur and big, cracked antlers, staring at the girl just like she stared at it. 

Lottie tilted her head, and so did the deer. 

I am part of thee, and thou are part of me.

The whisper - the same one that called her into the river that evening, talked in her ear. Slowly and raspy. 

I am thy shadow.

Suddenly she didn’t feel cold anymore, and the weight of her head disappeared as the antlers of the animal fell to the floor. 

She felt light. So light, she thought she could fly if she tried.

It was the first and last time she saw It , before her parents started giving her the pills.

Summer, 2017

The bedroom walls of the trailer were filled with posters, drawings and photos of the girls. Her bed was a complete mess, clothes and makeup all over it. Her laptop was logged on Lottie’s Spotify account - which technically was also Nat’s, since she refused to actually use the one her mother paid for every month. 

Chunks of thick brown hair fell on the ground as the snaps of a pair of scissors filled the room along with Courtney Love's voice and her trashy guitar.

“Done!” Natalie stepped back to admire her work, she had her lower lip trapped between teeth. “Shit, should I become a hairdresser?” 

“Oh you’re so humble…” Lottie rolled her eyes and blew a little hair that fell in her face.

“I mean, you look almost decent, so I guess I did a good job. Great, even.” She turned on her ankles to grab the tiny mirror sitting in her bed. 

“Shut the fuck up, let me see the damage.” The mirror was passed to the other’s hands. “What the fuck, Nat!? You gave me bangs?” Darker eyes looked pissed at the brunette. “Again!?”

“You said I could do whatever I wanted!” She raises her hands. 

“Yeah but not this !” Lottie got up and angrily walked to the full length mirror on the corner of the room. “Jackie was right, I look like a child like this…” 

Jackie, Jackie and Jackie! Nat rolled her eyes. Ugh!

The thing is: since Lottie started to go to an actual school - after getting tired of only seeing Natalie on the weekends, and begging her parents to enroll her in the same school Nat went to-, she has been pretty popular. Everyone knew who she was, talked about how they thought she had a perfect face, how smart she was and yadda, yadda, yadda. 

And it was nice to have everyone to know how amazing, pretty, funny and enchanting Charlotte was. Her friend Charlotte.

Really, everything was fine. 

Until Jackie Fucking Taylor, the queen of Wiskayok High, laid those big, huge, fucking bug eyes on her.  

Then suddenly, all Charlotte could talk about was how Jackie was nice, and how she lived just a couple houses from hers, and how pretty she was.

‘I wish we'd met sooner, it would have been nice to have her around when we were kids’  Lottie said the evening after sleeping over at the Taylor’s for the first time. 

Yeah, first time. They have been doing that a lot lately, it was making Nat’s skin crawl. Why does she want to have met her sooner? I was already there! 

“Well, Jacqueline is wrong. You look badass with them.” She walked over to her laptop to change the song. “By the way, she's not coming today, is she? I invited you. ” Kat Bjalland’s voice filled the room as ‘He’s My Thing’ by Babes In Toyland played.

“Oh, no! She doesn't like these kinds of stuff.” Body flopped on the bed. “She says it looks dirty.”

“So you think I'm dirty?” Natalie smirked, looking at the girl laying on her bed. “Do I stink?” Slowly walking over, standing between her legs and letting her body fall on top of Lottie’s. 

“Ouch! Nat!” 

“Don’t you like the manly smell of piss and booze that your punk friend exudes?” She laughed at the squeals that came out of Lottie’s mouth as she rubbed her face on the long neck and soft cheeks. “Does Princess Charlotte Matthews don't want to stink too?”

“Stop!” She laughed, trying to free herself from the girl on top of her. 

“Quit it! You’re stuck-” She felt a grab on her wrists as Lottie managed to flip them over, pinning them on each side of Nat’s head.

“I never said you stank! Nor did Jackie, she just made a great point. Mosh Pits stink!” She smiled big and struggled to get out of the grip. It was tight. “You’re the one stuck now.”

She gave up. “So you think I smell good?” Natalie breathed heavily and smirked up at Lottie.

“Yeah.” She was breathless. “I do.” 

Natalie's smile faded as she realized how close their faces were. Lottie's face was a little flushed, she had some strands of hair falling all over Nat’s face, fresh bangs stuck to her forehead, her chest rose and fell quickly and her stupid fang poked out as she smiled. Natalie gulped. 

“You’re getting red, are you okay?” She didn’t realize she was holding her breath. The bigger hands fanned her face and she nodded, finally allowing air to meet her lungs again. “M‘kay! Let’s get to work on your hair now, Miss Punk Girl.” And the additional weight on top of her had disappeared. She felt light headed. “Nat, come!” 

She sat up and looked at the girl who had the biggest smile on her face and a bowl filled with bleach on her gloved hands. 

[...]

It was a hot night out when the girls got out of the taxi and crossed the street. The booze on Lottie's bag clinked as she walked beside a fresh bleach blonde Natalie. 

“I don't think I'm punk enough.” Lottie looked around. Everyone had cool crusty pants, crazy hair - or lack of it, smudged makeup and spikes all over, but she had a black pleated skirt, a white long sleeve top and knee high boots on, besides the two little white bows on each side of her hair. “It looks like I'm going to the mall, give me your jacket.”

“What? No?” Nat said, crossing her arms. She had a black mesh top, with a simple bra underneath it, ripped fishnet thighs, a short black skirt, some high platform boots and her inseparable oversized leather jacket. 

“C’mon! It's the least you can do! You didn’t warn me this was the dress code.” 

“Dress… code?” She chuckled. “Lottie, we’re going to a punk show that is happening on an abandoned construction shed.” Pale hands took the bigger ones and looked up into her eyes. She still gets a little blown away when she is reminded of how tall Lottie was. The girl once had to look up at her, now she was this kind of Maori Amazon. But that night, they’re almost the same height, thanks to her five inch heels. “There 's no dress code. You just show up and have fun.” 

“Please? You look cool enough without it!” She looked at Nat with those damn big, brown, bambi eyes of hers. The ones Natalie couldn't say no to. 

She snorted. “Fine! Here.” And handed the jacked to the taller one. Lottie smiled big.

“Thanks! You’re the best!” She hugged her tight.

“Yeah, okay. You can let me go now.” Nat tapped her back.

They turned the corner and were met with this huge line. It stretched two entire blocks and it wasn’t even 8PM, yet. 

“Since when did all these people listen to Mommy Long Legs?” The bleach blonde haired girl said, looking over her shoulder. “As far as I remember it was just me, you and fifteen other girls…”

“Nat, they have like a hundred thousand monthly listeners.” Lottie stopped behind a person with buzzed green hair. 

“Still! All of them decided to come to a show in fucking Wyskayok, New Jersey?” A grimace grew on Nat’s face.  

“Stop being so grumpy! It's gonna be fun!” Lottie smiled. Maybe she was right, the show would be worth the time waiting.

Except she wasn't. 

Almost three hours in and they were still pretty far away from getting in. A couple of people sat on the floor after the first forty-five minutes, and Natalie wanted to do the same, her feet were killing her. 

She was about to tell Lottie that she wanted to go home, when two guys around their age approached them. “Hey! You two!” Both girls turned their heads at the same time. “Come on!” The one on the right beckoned to follow them. 

“We’re in line, I don’t know if you noticed…” Lottie bitched, flashing him a fake smile. 

“Kevyn?” Nat squinted. 

“Hey!” He smiled. “Do you guys wanna come in?” He pulled two paper bracelets off his pocket. 

“Hell yeah!” She grabbed Lottie’s hand and pulled her out the line. “We’re lucky, I know him. Come!”

Lottie agreed, walking beside her. Natalie was all smiles while talking to so-called ‘Kevyn’. Why hasn't she ever heard of this guy? And who is the other one? Why didn't he say a word? 

And why was he looking at Nat like that? 

“Okay, before we get in, I’m gonna need you to close your eyes and stick your tongue out.” Kevyn faced them, stopping by the back door. The girls looked at each other. “Come on! It’s just a little something to make the night better. It will be fun!” 

The blonde shrugged and did what she was told, eyes closed and tongue out. Lottie followed.

A small squared paper was placed on each tongue. “Okay, now we can get in.” 

[...]

Everything around her seemed to move in slow motion, the trashy sounds coming from the stage didn’t make sense anymore, it was just loud noise. The people around her looked odd. Eerie. Long, distorted features and big, eye lidless eyes stared at her. All of them. 

She couldn’t tell if it was an effect of the acid or just her schizophrenic mind that was making her see those things. But in that moment she didn’t care, she felt good. Like she didn’t in a while.

A bit in the back, past the stage, next to the restrooms, she could see a glimpse of white. Something tall stood there, bearded men spun around it and tried to touch the big antlers. 

A moose.

Staring at her. Just like everyone in that hot, suffocating construction shed.

“What the fuck…?” Natalie whispered beside her, green eyes wide opened, looking at the middle of the crowd of men bumping each other. “Is that a fucking moose?” 

“Wait, can you see it too?”

“Yeah…” She said lazily. “Do you see the eyes?” 

“I do!” Lottie chuckled, her eyes were getting heavy, she just wanted to lay down a little. “They’re so big… Do you think they are actually looking at us?” She lifted her hand and the skin looked like it was boiling, just like water in a kettle. 

“Nah, it’s just the acid.” Her face focused on a corner where two men stood. “Just the acid…” Her voice sounded weird. Lottie turned to look at her face. 

She had uneven eyes, the right one slowly dropping along with the whole right side of her face. Natalie was melting.  

“Dude… Your face…” She touched it and her finger sank on the skin. Lottie chuckled once more.

“You should see yours! Your skin is… moving?” A frown grew on the oozing skin. 

It was just the acid.

[...]

Her reflection on the bathroom mirror seemed to move on its own. Lottie blinked, but the one inside the mirror didn’t. 

She was staring at the door.

Lottie couldn’t remember what she was doing in there, or if she already did something. What the fuck is going on? Everything seemed like a weird dream, she was sure she would wake up at any moment. 

A salty drop of sweat met her left eye, and only then she realized how hot it was inside that room, she could barely breathe. Bony hands tapped water on her hot face. Nat is right… My skin is moving. Lottie thought as she took one last glance in the mirror, before stumbling out of the bathroom.

Nat… Where is she now?

Her eyes took a second to adapt to the flashing lights and blurry figures passing by. She felt the room spin as she looked around, trying to find the blonde. She walked around, bumping into some of the bizarre figures that had their eyes on her every move, trying her best to not throw up. 

She didn’t realize how she got there, but she stood right in front of the big, majestic creature. The one right in the middle of the pit. She got bumped a couple of times, but she couldn’t focus on anything other than the animal’s big face. 

It began to walk towards the improvised bar in the corner, and for some reason none of the distorted figures seemed to touch the animal, despite its size. Lottie followed. They walked a bit past the bar, and the creature stopped, bellowing to two figures.

Natalie.

She was leaning on that weird guy Kevyn had beside him. His name was Mattheo. He whispered something in her ear.

“Hey, calm down, shorty… We'll get you to a room, don't worry.” He had those filthy hands around her shoulders, and she tried to say something, nothing but a mumble came out.

“Nat?” Lottie stepped closer. His eyes widened and he tightened his hold on her body. Natalie’s eyes struggled to stay open as she slowly turned her head to face the brunette, she managed to whisper a weak ‘Lot…’ before having her face turned back into the boy’s neck by his hands.

“Don’t worry, ‘Lot’. I’m taking her home.” His lips turned into a big sinister grin. His eyes turned black. Fucking acid trip. “She asked me to.” He looked at her innocently. 

Natalie would never do that, at least not without talking to Lottie first. She didn’t even know him. 

When did he approach her? Why didn’t she cut him off right away? How long was she alone with this guy? 

How did Lottie let this happen? 

Natalie’s hand slipped off of her drink on the counter, making the glass shatter on the floor. She grunted and tried to pull away but he forced her to stay. 

“What did you do to her?” Lottie stepped closer and he threatened to let go of her. She would fall in the broken glass on the floor. Lottie stopped. 

Flashes of the Hercules Beetle flooded her mind. The crack of his head made her wince. 

She took a deep breath. 

Not this time.

Charlotte quickly stepped closer and he pushed the weak body to the floor and ran, disappearing into the throng. Luckily she was close enough to catch her, arms tightly holding the trembling body, sitting her back on the high bench. Natalie had some tears in her eyes as she looked up at Lottie. 

“It’s okay, you’re okay now.” She kissed her forehead. “Nothing bad is gonna happen.” 

And Lottie tried to feel relieved that she found her in time, that he didn’t get the chance to try and do whatever he was planning on doing that night. 

But she didn’t. 

She was angry. 

How dare he? What made him think he could do that with Natalie? Or with anyone? 

Did he do that with many girls? 

He needed to be stopped.

Three long figures approached them, they were different from the other distorted ones. Their eyes still looked weird, but not in an eerie way, it was almost comic how big they were. They had huge smiles on their round faces.

“Can you just keep an eye on her for a second?” Lottie said fast and the three creatures nodded. “And don’t you try to do anything. I will find you, and I’ll murder you.” They mumbled an ‘Okay.’ and held the girl. Lottie looked at the moose. “You. Keep an eye on them. ” It puffed.

So Lottie ran into the crowd, dodging the bodies while looking around to find him , and she didn’t have to search for long. His stupid smile was being flashed into another girl’s direction, as he reached around her and grabbed her drink. 

“HEY!” She shouted, stomping  firmly in their direction. He rolled his eyes while moving away from the curly haired girl. 

“Oh my god! What do you want!?” He opened his arms. “I already left your little friend alone." His cheeky smile made her want to knock all of his teeth out. 

“What the fuck did you give her, you fucking cock sucker?!” Lottie pushed the lanky body that laughed at the situation. He stumbled a couple steps back and bumped into some girls and their boyfriends, spilling their drinks. They pushed him back, cursing about their ruined clothes.

“You fucking bitch, if you touch me again I’ll fucking murder you! Fucking whore!” His smile died, being replaced by a furious expression as he tried to push her too.

“Matt! Calm the fuck down!” Kevyn held him back. “What is wrong with you? Don’t you know who she is?” 

“I don’t care who this fucking cunt is! I’m gonna-” 

“What are you gonna do, 5’7 man?” Lottie got closer, looking down at him. It was really funny to her, how can a man that size be so full of himself?

“Bitch-” He freed his body from Kevyn’s arms and stood tall by her face.

The buzz around them escalated quickly to a loud chant of ‘Fight! Fight! Fight!’, and Lottie, just for a second, felt scared. She was surrounded by old, sweaty, drunk men, and had a red faced, pinscher looking boy in front of her ready to throw some hands.

By the corner of her eye she could see the girls taking Natalie out of the mess. The blonde had passed out.

Lottie saw red. 

Her body was so filled with rage, that didn’t leave room for fear anymore. She needed to let it out. 

It seemed to be visible how much she wanted to hit something- stain her fists with blood, by the face Kevyn Tan made. He looked terrified.

“I’ll fucking crush your pretty face…” He said between teeth.

Lottie chuckled. “You can try.” She felt pretty confident. She knew she was better than him. 

But you can’t win a fight with ego, you have to actually know what you’re doing. And Charlotte Matthews - the golden girl, had never lifted her fists in her life. Not even once. She never had to. 

She had no idea of what she was doing.

Mattheo was fast when he threw the first punch. Right on the nose. Lottie heard a crack, she saw stars for a moment. Legs stumbled back and she blinked a couple of times to try and focus her sight on the boy running in her direction.

Her eyes closed and in a desperate act, she elbowed him in the face and waited for the second punch. It didn’t came. 

As she opened her eyes back up, he was laying on the floor with an unfocused look in his eyes.

She did it? 

Oh my god!

She did it!

Her lungs were filled with pride again as she straddled his waist and held his face, forcing him to look at her. “What did you put on her drink?”

He only smiled, blood oozing from his lip, into the mouth. Lottie locked her jaw.

Motherfucker!

“What. Did. You. Give. To. Her.” The words came out between punches that hit anywhere her fists landed. Chin. Nose. Eyes. 

Ground. 

“A-cid! Just s-some more acid!” He spat, pulling his hands up to cover the bloody face. The blue eyes looked at her, between fingers, in almost terror. Almost.

He lies. The familiar voice whispered to her. 

Lottie got off him and walked over to the tallest distorted figure in the crowd around them, snatching their beer bottle off the long fingers. Matt was trying to get up, so she quickened her steps and pushed him back to the floor so hard, he hit his head. The girl straddled him again, hitting the bottle on the floor beside him. The majority of the bottom and body was spread all around, but the firm grip she had around the neck prevented it from shattering. 

Shaky hands pressed the pointy glass against the pale pink skin of his neck, it looked like rubber. 

“I’m not gonna ask you again.” The words came out low and between teeth, the glass kept sinking but it didn’t seem to tear the skin open and it was making her blood boil. She could feel it boiling. She pressed harder, a tear of red dripped from the rubber skin. Finally.

Before she even got the pleasure of seeing it run down to the ground, her body was harshly pulled back. She fell sitting down on the floor.

“Ketamine!” Kevyn screamed, crouched next to the body on the floor. “He spiked her drink! It was just for fun!” His eyes were wide.

“What the fuck… FOR FUN!?” Lottie yelled, quickly getting up and stomping in their direction again. “FOR FUCKING FUN?” She grabbed another bottle from a random hand and threw in their direction. It shattered on Kevyn’s back. 

“Okay, it’s enough! You! Get out!” The security guard pointed at Lottie. 

“Me?!” She looked at him in shock. “He drugged my friend!”

“Well everyone gets drugged here, princess. Or are these huge pupils of yours because you really love me?” He mocked. 

“W-hat? No!” She breathed out. “It’s different, he put something on her drink-”

“Girl, I don't care! He wasn’t the one with a broken bottle on your neck.” He grabbed her arm. “Get. Out!”

She snorted and stormed over to the three girls that sat beside Natalie on the floor.

“Hey, we’re going home now, ok? I’m so sorry, Nat…” Her eyes flooded as she caressed the cheeks of the unconscious girl. 

She grabbed her bag and snatched her phone out to call an uber, when she saw the notifications on the bright screen.

11 New messages from Jack Jack <3.

04h57 PM.

heyy girly

are you free tonight? 

parents r not home :p 

06h33 PM.

helloooo 

r u alive? 

08h10 PM.

your dad just called to ask how we are doing

where tf are you?

i lied n said we were doing fine btw…

10h58 PM.

okay i’m getting worried

WHERE ARE YOIU ANSWER ME 

00h00 AM.

bitch .

01h45 AM.

hey jacks, srry

i can explain everything. can we come over?

by we i mean me and nat…

01h45 PM.

FUCK SAKE

yeh sure

and by nat, you mean your bsf that hates me? 

01h46 PM.

thanks

and she doesn’t hate u

stop it

01h46 PM.

yeah whatever you say

hurry up!

[...]

“Oh my god, you’re bleeding! What happened?” Jackie asked as soon as a bloody nosed  Lottie- struggling to hold Nat’s collapsed body in her arms, knocked on the door.

“Can I tell you after we…?” She pointed at the girl in her arms with her chin. 

“Oh! Yes, of course!” The honey blonde helped her to bring the girl inside, locking the door behind her. 

Natalie was laid on the big, round bed of Jackie’s room, limbs spread all over and hair entangled on her necklaces. It was the best the two girls could do after carrying her upstairs. 

The brunette explained everything to the curious bug eyes, that she thought couldn’t get bigger, but at every detail she spilled, they managed to get wider. Jackie told her she could sleep and she would keep an eye on Natalie, but Lottie kindly refused.

Charlotte sat at the green armchair beside the bed. She stayed up all night long, observing the blonde’s every move, checking her pulse every fifteen minutes and listening to her breathing. Jackie tried to accompany her, but dozed off in a couple of hours, laying on the floor. 

She ignored the throbbing of her fist, all the faces in the corners of the room and the whispers in her ears.

They could fuck off.

Chapter Text

Knock. Knock.

No answer. 

Knock. Knock. Knock. 

No one. 

They were home, she knew it. She would have seen it if they had left, considering she spent the entire morning waiting by the door.

Deep breath. 

Hand palms slammed the wood. 

“Oh my fuck! Can’t you wait!?” A muffled hoarse voice finally said.

Before the door would open, she straightened up, pushing the glasses up with her right middle finger. 

And the door was opened. Harshly. 

“Who the fuck-”

“Good morning, Jacqueline Taylor. I would advise you not to tag your neighborhood on your Instagram posts. It was fairly easy to find your residence.” She interlaced her fingers. “You could die, you know? Your back door is unlocked.” She blinked, waiting for a response but the girl only opened her mouth, just to close it again. She looked confused. “I checked.” She clarified. “I would like to talk to Charlotte, please.” 

“Quigley?” Jackie yawned, rubbing her eyes with the back of her hand. “What are you doing here? It’s like, six in the morning…” 

“Wasn’t I clear? I wish to speak to Lottie.” She tried to look behind the girl, to find who she was looking for.

“How do you know Lott is here-”

“Misty..?” A tall tired looking figure, wrapped in a blanket, emerged from one of the rooms.

“Lottie! Hi!” She pushed Jackie out of the way and walked in, over to the zombie looking girl, who had a glass of water in hands. “You did great yesterday- Actually, no. You didn’t, that was horrible and embarrassing.” Her smile died while looking at the taller one’s face. “Did you notice how crooked your nose is?” Then at the hand that held the glass. “And your arm…”

“My arm..?” Lottie blinked. 

“Sweety, I know you haven't slept all night and you’re still under the effects of LSD- Your pupils are huge, by the way. Did you take your pills today?” Misty pulled Lottie’s lower eyelid down. “Anyway, that can wait. Your wrist is swollen. And bruised. You might have suffered a microfracture on your radius, which is great ‘cause it’s quick to heal. It could have been much worse, considering how hard you punched the ground.” She spoke fast, a growing grimace as she flipped Lottie’s fist and noticed how the bruise spread from the wrist to the base of her palm, next to the thumb. “Speaking of worse fractures, back to your nose. Do you want me to put it back in place? It might hurt a littl-”

“Misty! Slow down.” Lottie sat the free - bruised, hand on the girl's shoulders.

“Sorry!” Misty placed a hand over her mouth. “I’m here to see you and Natalie.” Head tuned to the sleepy looking girl that still held the door open. “You are here, so I guess I'm seeing you too… Hi.”

“What do you mean- This is my house!” Jackie complained.

“How- How did you know we were here?” 

“In the same way I know who that creep is.” She lifted a finger. 

“That… doesn't answer much…” Jackie closed the door.

“Well, I have my ways.” Misty sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Can I come in so we can talk? Also I brought something for Natalie.” She lifted a paper bag.

“You’re standing in the living room, I guess you’re already in .” Lottie pointed out.

“Oh yeah…” She looked down at her pink shoes, they had some green stuck on the sides. She turned to the girl by the door. “By the way, the grass in your yard looks terrible. Is uneven. I recommend you hire someone better to cut it.”

“Hire…? My dad cuts it…” Jackie said under her breath, the curly haired one had already turned back to Lottie.

“Saracusa.” Misty said simply, sighing again as she noticed Lottie seemed lost. “The guy. The one drugged Natalie.” She explained, walking over to the fireplace, running her middle finger over it, searching for any trace of dust. Nothing. Taylors are clean, I see. “Mattheo Saracusa. He’s a Rutgers student.” 

“Misty-” 

“His dad is an officer and covers up his bad behavior.” She walked over to the couches, manically adjusting the colorful cushions. “Before you ask, my cousin told me.”

“By bad behavior you mean sexually assaulting girls at parties? If not worse?” Jackie walked over to the girl, placing a hand over the quick ones. “Stop that.”

“I just didn’t want to phrase it like that. It makes me want to kill, roast and serve him like a damn pig at a Cuban’s family Christmas table.” Misty’s eyes unfocused, looking at the hand on top of hers. “I would love to devour him. We could start by eating his face… The nose has always been my favorite part.” Her fingers tightened around the soft surface. “It’s juicy and tasty…” 

“Well… I’m pretty sure we can't do that , Misty. What do you wanna do? Cannibalize him? That 's wrong.” The bug eyed girl grabbed the cushion and pulled it away from the curly blonde’s hands. “And a crime.” 

The girl snapped out of her murderous thoughts. “Cannibalism is not a crime. Only the ways of obtaining the flesh are, like murder and the violation of the corpse.” She said it with a bland face and walked over to the other side of the couch, sitting down.

“It- It doesn’t make it least wrong…? Misty-” 

“I said it made me want to do something like that, not that I would!” Right middle finger pushed the glasses up. “I just came here to give you guys this information, so we can think of a revenge plan.” 

“Reveng- We’re not in a movie, you know?” Lottie sighed. 

“Didn’t seem like you cared if we were in a movie or not, when you pressed that bottle on the guy’s neck.” Misty countered. 

“I was angry and under the effects of drugs!” 

“Guys!” Jackie scolded, having the two faces turned in her direction. “What are we going to do then? We can't just let him keep getting away from this shit. Nor his dad, for covering it up.”

Lottie sighed again, resting a hand on her waist. “I mean, I can talk to my parents… I’m sure they can help. The right amount of money can buy anything, right?” 

“I don’t want you to do anything.” A voice said. All the faces were turned to the staircase, where a disheveled Natalie stood, hugging herself. 

“Nat! You’re awake…” Lottie quickly walked over to the figure. She looked so small and confused , the brunette’s heart sank. “How do you feel? Are you dizzy? Do you feel like throwing up?” She touched the blonde’s forehead with the back of her hand. “Can you remember what happened yesterday?” 

“Relax, I’m fine” She let out a weak laugh. “And no, I don't remember much after we got in with Kev- That asshole…” She looked at her palms. “But I heard you talking. Mattheo Saracusa, huh? That’s good to know.” 

“Yes, well.. Since you’re here, we were thinking-” 

“No.” Natalie lifted her hand. “I already know what I wanna do.” 

[...]

Natalie never thought she would feel bad about someone beating the shit out of a guy just to protect her. Actually, she always wanted it to happen. Something about having a person to care about her so much they risk someone else’s integrity - or even better, put their own aside -, was really fucking hot to her. She dreamt about it sometimes.

But when this person isn’t a man - or even worse: when this person is Lottie - her Charlotte , suddenly it isn’t so hot anymore. It wasn't hot at all, it made her heart ache. 

It was infuriating. 

When the first thing she saw while stumbling down the stairs - after waking up with her mouth dry and having no idea of where she was, or what happened -, was the image of a black eyed brunette, wrapped in a orange blanket with broken nose and bruised arm; she felt like crying, bawling her eyes out like a child. And it wasn’t even for what could’ve happened to her. She couldn’t care less. 

The sight of Lottie’s worried eyes, long legs quickly walking over to her, asking a million questions about her well-being, when the girl looked like that , made Natalie hate herself for not being more careful about her drink, for not trying harder to push the guy away. 

For being so vulnerable, Lottie got hurt. 

And her self hatred got even worse when - while waiting for the girl in the waiting room of the hospital, she watched the videos circling around of Lottie flinching before taking the first - and only, punch. 

That guy did that. 

He lifted his filthy hands and punched her face- the face that should never be touched with that kind of aggressiveness. Or any. 

Natalie couldn’t stop her mind from picturing his fists locked inside a jar above her bed, where she could watch as their flesh slowly gets eaten by the worms, leaving nothing but bones behind.

Bones which she would proudly turn into earrings, exposing them as a warning to whoever thought they could get near Charlotte again. 

A sweet voice took her eyes off the bright screen - where the video played on loop, and unfortunately, her mind off her sweet daydreams. “Nat?” Big brown eyes looked at her. “I’m back. Did they check you already?” 

Lottie had a metal cast laying on the bridge of her nose - now in the right place, and a black wrist splint. She also had a huge smile on her face, which was what made Nat’s guilt fade away for a second. 

“Um- Yeah! I’m totally fine, thanks to the medicine Misty got me and-” But it hit her hard on the chest once more. “- thanks to you… If I had drank a little more, I could- He could’ve put me in a coma… Thanks, Lot.” She could feel her eyes stinging, so she looked away. “Really.” Before the other could open her mouth to say one more ‘You don’t need to thank me.’, Natalie interrupted. “And how are you? How 's your arm?” 

“Oh! I got lucky, it was only the wrist.” She twisted her forearm twice. “Two weeks with this bad boy, and I’ll be good as new.” 

“Don’t do that! It’ll slow your healing process!” Nat scolded.

“Sorry, Doc…” She smiled, and the other rolled her eyes. “Are you ready to go home?” 

“Yeah, but can we go to yours first? I don’t think I wanna face my sweet mother at the moment.” She got up, walking beside the taller one. 

“Aunt Vera must be furious…” 

“I know! You’re lucky your parents are out of the country.” As they passed through the automatic doors, Nat trotted to catch the taxi that was almost leaving. “Madam…” The girl opened the door and held it open for the brunette. 

“I’m God’s favorite princess.” Lottie smiled and shrugged. “Oh, thank you! Chivalry is not dead, after all.” She laughed, getting in.

“I could say the same about you. My hero! “ She joked in a high pitched voice, sitting beside the brown eyed girl.

Lottie pushed the smaller shoulder lightly, a smile dancing on her lips. “Fucking idiot…” 

Something tickled the bottom of Nat’s stomach and held the corners of her mouth up, even minutes after the sight of the little fang, or when the girl got quiet as she looked out the window at the changing landscape of New Jersey, going from old brick buildings and ugly factories, to wide green fields. 

Even when the only sound that lingered inside the white cab was Lottie’s soft snoring while leaning onto Natalie’s body, little by little, until she finally had her head resting on the blonde’s shoulder. 

The same thing that tickled and held her silly smile up, stiffen her body to stay still so not to wake the girl up. Natalie knew she hadn’t slept all night, and she would refuse to even breathe if that meant disturbing Lottie’s dreams. 

But none of her efforts mattered when - thirty minutes later, as soon as they arrived at the big white gate -, a coyote suddenly crossed the road, making the car stop abruptly. 

The action made their bodies be harshly thrown forward, only being held back by the seat belt. Lottie had woken up in fright. 

“Sorry!” The old man said, apologetic brown eyes looking at the fire on the green ones, through the rearview. “It came out of nowhere…” 

Natalie sighed, and the sleepy girl beside her smiled. “It 's fine. It wasn’t your fault.” She turned her head to the girl beside her, Natalie looked pissed. “I would have to wake up at some point since we’re already here.” She whispered to her, as she noticed Nat’s death stare to the back of the man’s head. “Nat, stop.” 

The pale jaw relaxed, as she took a deep breath. “Yeah, it’s okay. Thank you for the ride.” She said, unclicking her belt and opening the door.

“How much do I owe you?” Darker hands grabbed her bag, searching for her wallet. 

“I paid already.” The blonde said simply.

“Nat…” 

“You know my mom’s financial situation it’s not as bad as it once was, right? If not bad at all.” Natalie offered her hand to help the girl get out of the car.

“I know, but like- I- My parents-” Lottie sighed. “I don’t like when you spend money on me, you know that.” She had a hard expression on her face as she accepted the hand.

“It wasn’t on you , dummy! Don’t flatter yourself that much, I'm here too. Besides, it was only twenty dollars.” Her tanned face still looked serious, eyebrows pinched together. “C’mon… Your family health insurance paid for my checkup, let me do this. For once?” Natalie batted her lashes and pouted a little. 

Lottie rolled her eyes. She couldn’t stop the smile from growing. “Okay…”  

“Thanks!” She had a big triumphed smile on her lips. “Bye!” She waved at the car as it drove away. “Hurry up, I wanna take a shower.” Natalie began to run up the earthy path, as soon as the gates were opened.

“Don’t you like to stink, Miss punk girl?” Lottie followed.

“Fuck you!” She laughed. “Bet I can reach the door before you do.” She said looking back at the girl who was catching up to her speed. 

“You underestimate me…” Lottie said as she overtook the blonde one. “My legs are longer!”

“Bitch-”

Natalie forced her legs to work harder, her lungs inhaled and exhaled  the air so quickly she felt light headed. 

Lottie could be real fast when she wanted to. ‘Guess that's why the coach chose her as the center back’ , Natalie thought.

As the two girls reached the top, the brunette stopped abruptly, making the shorter one bump into her back. When Nat looked over Lottie’s shoulder, she didn’t expect to see a black Mercedes parked by the garage.

“Your parents are back from Australia already?” A wide eyed Natalie said, looking at the big car. 

“Shit. We’re so fucked….” Lottie laughed nervously. “Your mom is here too…” She  pointed the red Jeep out. “Do you think that if we run fast enough, we can catch that cab to your house?” 

“I don’t think we can…” She looked at the big window in the living room, revealing three figures staring at the red faced girls outside. 

Lottie whined and held her breath as she slowly walked over to the door, having Natalie trying to hide behind her back. Before she could reach the doorknob, the long piece of wood was opened, and she instantly looked at the floor.

“Charlotte Isobel Matthews!” 

“Natalie Magdalene Scatorccio!” 

The three angry looking figures said at the same time. 

“Oh, I'm sorry! Do you guys want to go first?” The older - now redheaded, Scatorccio placed a hand over her chest, looking at the other two parents. 

“No, don't worry. You can begin.” Emilia placed a hand over the woman's shoulder. She smiled. 

As she looked at the bleach blonde, her face fell harsh again. “You.” She pointed the short fingers at a shrinking Natalie, beside a wide eyed Lottie. “Where did you tell me you guys were going yesterday?” Silence. “I want you to answer me.” 

“To a show…” The blonde said under her breath, her mother wouldn’t be able to hear her words, if it wasn’t for the complete silence of the house.

“Exactly.” Vera stepped closer, intertwining her fingers in front of her. “Did you specify which type of show?” 

“... A chill one…” 

“A chill one! Now imagine my surprise, when I opened Facebook this morning and there's videos of both of you getting shit faced in a damn punk show?!” 

“Mom-”

“No.” Vera interrupted. “You lied to me, and brought Lottie along!” 

“Now that you mentioned her name…” Furious greenish-brown eyes - now darker than ever, migrated from one girl to another. “Charlotte! What is this?” He lifted his phone, showing her the bright screen. 

It showed a message by a contact saved as ‘Jamie’: ‘Mal, I apologize profusely for bothering you, but I came across this video a couple of minutes ago. Isn’t this your daughter? It looks just like Charlotte…’ And then the video of her straddling Matt’s lap while smashing the bottom of a beer bottle on the floor.

Misty was wrong. She looked rad doing that. 

A smile almost grew on her lips. 

“Are you smiling? Is this funny to you? Do you think this-” He pointed at her broken nose. “-is funny?” 

“Daddy-” 

“Don't ‘daddy’ me! I'm upset with you!”

“I can explain-” 

“There's no explaining Charlotte!” Emilia intervened. “You lied to us, and even involved Taylor's girl into this!” How did they know about them sleeping over at Jackie’s?  “You are only sixteen and you drank, used god knows what to make your eyes look like that, and got into a fight! What is happening?”

“She did drugs?!” Mal’s eyes widened as he looked at his wife in shock. “Oh, Em I think I’m going to pass out..” He fanned his face. 

“I dragged her, Mal…” Natalie began.

“No! She’s lying.” Lottie quickly spoke. “I wanted to go. It was something I had never experienced and I begged Nat to take me there-” She lied. “- she even said it was a bad idea, but I kept asking.” Natalie stared at her with her big eyes, ‘What are you doing?’, Lottie kept going. “It’s my fault.”

“You don’t need to take the blame, Lottie.” Vera sighed. 

“I’m not! Nat can confirm.” Brown eyes looked over to the girl beside her, Natalie opened her mouth and Lottie could feel she would deny it, so she gave the blonde her best ‘ Trust me!’ look. “It was my idea.” 

After seconds of pondering about trusting or not whatever plan the girl had, Natalie spoke. “Yeah… Lott really wanted to go…” She looked at the older ones, trying to sound confident in her made up story. “And you know how she is. This girl can be really persuasive when she wants to.” 

“Lottie!” Emilia rebuked. “I can’t believe this! What if both of you got in danger?” 

“I know, and I’m sorry, mom! I was so excited, I didn’t think straight…” She threw her big regretful eyes at her mother. “And daddy, it was just weed I promise!” Which, partially, wasn’t a lie. She did smoke weed that night, it just wasn't the only thing to get her high.

“Since when does one get into a fight when smoking weed?” He frowned, crossing his arms.

“Okay, I lied.” Lottie confessed. “I may have had one or two drinks… But that was all!”

“And what was that about? You never got into a fight!” Malcolm said, lifting his hand to touch the metal on her nose. “Your beautiful face…” He whispered.

“About that- Um…” Lottie could’ve told the truth. She could’ve told her parents about those disgusting perverts, given them names and what college Matt went to. She knew her dad could do something about the guy, but she promised Natalie to not tell anything. So she didn’t. “He was- Uh- Bumping in a lot of girls and he spilled my water… I think I got caught by the moment and got aggressive… Sorry.” 

“See? That’s what drinking does to you!” Her father exasperated. 

“Child, just want your best when I tell you: Feeling cool, or wanting to escape for a moment, is not worth it. Trust me…” Vera stepped closer. “I’ve been there, and I dug my own grave. Aggressiveness isn’t the worst that can happen to you, so I beg, don't do that to yourself.” Green eyes looked deep into brown ones. 

Lottie knew about Vera’s struggle when it came to alcohol, and she would never go there. The girl didn't even like drinking like that. But she didn’t interrupt the woman, knowing it was from the heart, so the brunette just nodded.

“Alright, now you two can take a shower, you smell like a wino.” Vera said, beckoning them towards the stairs. 

“Mhm, thanks… We’re sorry, again.” Lottie said, grabbing Nat’s hands and starting to walk to her room, having the girl murmuring an ‘Yeah, we fucked up.’, beside her. 

“Oh! Just one more thing…” Emilia looked over her shoulder. “Charlotte, you’re grounded.” And smiled. 

The girl nodded and quickened her steps. Natalie could see Lottie’s lips threatening to give in to a smile, and frowned. She couldn't understand what was so funny about all that.

As they reached the white door, Lottie pushed the blonde inside and closed it. She squealed, a big smile on her face as she turned around. 

“What was that?” Nat asked as the other burst into laughter. “Lottie!” 

The girl couldn’t speak for a couple of seconds, catching her breath back and laughing over and over again. 

“God! That was easy!” She said as soon as her laughing fit stopped, having an angry - and confused, Natalie looking at her. “I’ve never been grounded before, you know? It's my parents' first time doing this thing…”

“So? Still doesn’t explain why you took all the blame, dude.” 

“Oh my god!” Lottie complained, taking off her top. “My parents don’t know how long a grounding should last, so I’m probably locked up in here for like, three days? If I had let you take the blame your mom would ground you for a month or two.” She said walking into her closet. “Strategy.” 

Natalie sighed, flopping in the bed. 

Three days.

Two weeks. 

Two whole weeks, almost three.

As it turned out, Malcolm and Emilia did know how long a grounding should last. Guess being friends with Vera helped them to get an idea on how to absolutely rock their first time doing that. 

Lottie wasn't allowed to see Natalie or any of her friends after school, and they took her phone away, so her only pastime was reading. She has always been a bookworm, but in the past few years this passion of hers, gave place to others. Something she could do with Natalie. Like reviewing each other's favorite albums like experienced critics, or pretending to understand anything about guitars when the girl couldn’t shut her mouth about them.

So yeah, she was supposed to be pretty bored.

But for some reason, her parents let Lottie keep her laptop. If it wasn’t for that, she wouldn’t still be in touch with the girls - and also be up on Nat’s revenge plan. 

Speaking of which: It was happening that night. Misty had tracked down where Matt was supposed to go, and had everything set up. All the girls should do was stick to what was planned. 

Starting with Lottie finding a way out of the prison cell - her bedroom. 

The girl was shoving some clothes in her backpack when she heard steps outside the pink room. She quickly ran up to her desk and opened an algebra book, trying her best to look like she was actually reading all that. 

Two knocks on the door. 

“Come in!” 

Her mother's head poked inside. “Hey, dinner is getting cold, are you sure you're not hungry?”  

“Yeah mom, I just had a sandwich…” She lifted the empty plate. “I'm still pretty full, I'll probably finish my homework and go to bed.” She faked a yawn

Emilia squinted at the girl. Since that morning after the show, Lottie hadn't left her room if it wasn't to grab a snack or to leave for school. The way she would just lock herself in her room was starting to get her parents worried. 

What they didn't know was that she did that just to talk to Natalie all day, it was almost biological the way she needed to be in touch with the blond at all times. Lottie was pretty sure that if in those two weeks she actually went no contact with Nat, her body would be completely rotted at that point. 

“Baby, you know all this is for your best, right? This is not a form of punishment- No, actually that's exactly what this is.” She pressed her eyes together,taking a deep breath. “What I mean is: it is not fun to cut all of your favorite things out, we don't like doing that, but it's necessary. Do you understand that?”

Lottie smiled, she did understand. 

Of course, it wasn’t fun to have spotlights at her every move, and having to explain herself every five minutes. But she was aware of their intentions. If she had a daughter, and the girl pulled the shit she pulled with her parents, she would probably lock her in a tower for two years.

“I do, mom. I promise you I’m not upset.” She chuckled. “I’m just taking this time to try and improve my grades…”

“Oh! That’s- good… I’m proud of you, baby.” The worried eyebrows relaxed, allowing the corners of her mouth to show the perfect set of teeth. “Um, good night, then. Love you.” 

“Night, mum.” Lottie blew the older woman a kiss. “I love you.” 

As the door was closed, so did her book. 

She was about to run back to her closet, when the iMessage notification coming from her laptop caught her attention.

5 new messages from nat a lee s2 

10h46PM

hey, jacqueline is ready, r u coming? 

lottieeee 

10h48PM 

wtf can you fking answer? 

DIE 

11h05PM

bro .

11h06PM 

hi bb sorry! needed to pretend to study so 

my parents would leave me alone 

i'm coming 

come pick me up?

11h06PM 

oh yeh i forgot ur locked up in there 

like rapunzel or some shit 

11h07PM

ur mums fault

11h07PM

sorry bout that :(

11h08PM 

nooo it's fine 

really

i jus miss seeing ur stupid face 

everyday after school :p

11h08PM

well i don't. :) 

11h08PM

shut tf up lmao 

are coming or not

11h09PM

yep 

11h25PM

here!!

It was Lottie's first time sneaking out, and she felt electrified. 

[...]

The ringing bell on the door took her eyes off the hypnotic blinking of the neon lights at the diner sign. Misty was leaving the store, two big white bags in her hands.

“Do you have everything?” Lottie said as soon as the girl entered the van. 

“Yes. They had a couple of these in the back for Halloween, we got lucky.” She said opening the bag and grabbing the packages.

“Let me see…” Lottie took it, running her fingers through all four of them. “That’s spooky shit.” She smiled. “Where’s Jacks?” 

“She’s already inside, Nat’s got an eye on her.” Misty fixed her makeup on the rearview, touching up the red lipstick. “I should get going. Are you coming?” 

“Uh-uh. I don’t think I’ll be allowed in any of those for at least five years now, my dad made sure of it.” She chuckled. “I’ll stay here, text me if anything goes wrong.”

“Alright.” And she got out of the car, crossing the street to get in. It was just a little alley between a bakery and a residential building. Discrete and humble, no one could tell that it was an entrance to a club. 

A club where Warren Saracusa’s son attended every night. Where the police superintendent’s son drugged and abused girls every chance he got. 

It was hot inside, the walls were sweating almost as much as the skin of her back, and the barman with a thick mustache who prepared her Cosmopolitan. She tried not to look too much at all the people around her, afraid that if she did they would be able to see how nervous and uncomfortable she was with all the fake tats on her body and tight clothes.

Jackie fixed her so fucking short skirt, as she looked around to find where the girls stood, and also to try and see if their target was around. 

In a dark corner she could see two pairs of eyes looking in her direction. They found a nice place to stay out of the spotlight, but at the same time not too suspicious.

“Here you go!” The man slid her the drink. He smiled, but his mustache was so long that covered his lips, so all she could see was his eyes tightening and the facial hair moving. She smiled back.

“Thanks.” 

Jackie took a sip of the drink, wondering how many of those she’d take to finally be confident enough to find that guy and make him interested in taking her home. What if he already chose his victim? What if he didn’t find her attractive? 

It would be a long night, she hadn’t seen him since she entered that sardine can, and had no idea of how to find him.

“Cosmopolitan, huh? Such a girly drink.” A voice said to her left. 

Just like she had summoned the devil, Mattheo materialized himself by her side. Is he that easy to impress?  

“Well, I’m a girl.” She breathed in. “Don’t know if you can tell.” 

“You bet I can! But what I meant was that you seem to be a sophisticated woman.” He turned a little, and she could.’t see much of his face - or the damage Lottie had done. It was dark, and the flashing of the lights coming from the dance floor weren’t helping.

“Do I?” Jackie squinted.

“Yeah, I mean, look at you…” He tried to hide his gaze, but she could feel it lingering on her exposed legs. She felt a shiver running down her spine - not the good kind. “I have a proposition.” Blue eyes looked back up at her face.

“Go on…”

“I’ll pay you a real drink. Something at your level.” He leaned closer. “How about that?”

Jackie felt sick looking at him, knowing what he had done to Natalie and tons of other women. She just wanted to rush things, but Misty’s voice kept echoing in her head ‘He likes the chase, you need to play hard to get.’ She sighed. “I don't know…  I wasn’t planning on drinking much today…” 

“C’mon, it's just one drink.” He smiled big, seeming to like the tone she had. Bingo! “Please?” 

“I don’t think so…” And then his face dropped, a tint of red in the back of his eyes. Alright, not too hard to get. Noted! Her serious face crumbled in a weird smile. “Alright! Just one drink. But you’ll have to drink with me!” 

He flashed his teeth at her again, turning to the man on the other side of the counter. Matt barely even opened his mouth, he only placed a finger over a name on the menu and mumbled ‘Two.’ at the barman. The guy looked at her, and then at Matt apprehensively, as if he knew what the guy used to do. 

He probably did. 

Due to the lack of response coming from Jackie, the barman just sighed. Apologetic eyes thrown at her. “Two Martinis coming in a second…” 

“Martinis? Really? Is that your sophisticated drink?” 

“What? Do you want me to order you a glass of Bourbon?” 

“You could.” 

“Nah… I think martinis suit you better.”

She didn’t know what else to say, and she was afraid of letting silence take over. “What happened to your face?” Jackie jumped at the sound of her own voice. She didn’t want to say that. 

She wasn’t supposed to. 

He had a surprised look on his eyes, like it wasn’t obvious that someone would get curious about how fucked up he looked. 

He blinked. “I- Uhm, I got in a fight…” And gulped. “Actually, no. Someone hit me…” 

Jackie had to force the muscles of her face to stay in place, she couldn’t laugh at how stupid  he sounded. 

“Really? Poor thing…” She tried her best to not sound like she was mocking the guy. “Who could’ve done that?” 

“My stepfather.” He was quick in his response, which led the girl to wonder how many times he told that lie. 

“Here you go! Two martinis.” The man on the other side of the counter slid two glasses in his direction. She pretended not to see the weird sizzling on the right one. 

“Thanks a lot man!” Matt said, blocking the drinks with his body as he leaned even closer to her. “But I don't want to talk about me. Tell me more about these sick tatties of yours.” His hand touched her shoulder and she felt the skin under it itch to move away, but she stayed.

She leaned into the touch.

“You like them?” 

“Yeah I do…” Suddenly, he looked hungry for her, and Jackie - who was praying things would work out quickly, took her chance. 

She was uncomfortable and wanted that thing to be over soon, so she assumed her most sexy alter ego, shoving her disgust down her throat. 

“Uhm, I have one in this very intimate place, you know? But I don’t know if you deserve to see it…” The girl teased, resting her free hand on his thigh, fighting the urge to gag as she noticed his arousal. Disgusting pervert!

“I’m sure I'll see it. Deserving or not.” His arms slithered around her waist like thick snakes, squeezing her ribs as he got closer to her ear. Jackie had always been repulsed by reptiles. “I always get what I want. Besides, in my condition… After my stepdad did this to me… Don’t you think I deserve a reward? I could fuck you right…” His voice sounded low, she winced everytime his hot breath met her skin.

Jackie tried to overcome her revulsion and find her sexy voice again. “I don’t know…” She placed her hands on the back of his sweaty neck. Ew! Gross. “You still haven’t told me why he did that to you.” With her right hand she waved and pointed at their glasses, behind him. 

Misty walked over them, leaning over the counter, pretending to think about what she was going to order. 

She carefully scooped closer to where the two martinis sat, and switched the one the barman drugged, adding a half pill of Rohypnol on his drink. The tablet quickly dissolved in the bottom of the glass. Perfect.

“What are you doing?” The sudden voice made her jump, retracting the hand she had over the drink. 

“I was about to order, but looking at the state of this counter…” She palmed her hands on the dark marble and lifted slowly. Her skin struggled to let go of the sticky surface. “I would rather not. I’m not in the mood to contract leptospirosis today, thanks.” 

“What? Leptos-” The barman was shocked. “This place is the cleanest of all around! I clean it myself-” 

“There's a rat hiding behind your Aperol.” 

“What?” As he turned around, the rodent jumped from the shelves, right into his shoulders and then the floor, running to the door on the left of the bar, probably the storage. 

Misty shrugged, turning away. “Told ya.” 

And the girl walked back to the dark corner where Nat stood, staring at the two figures.

Matt pulled away a little. “I’m sorry… I don't know if I'm ready to talk about what happened…” He faked a sad face. “Could we not talk about it…?” Sad blue eyes were thrown at Jackie’s direction. She had to hold herself back not to roll her eyes at him. 

“Yeah, sure. I’m sorry for pushing you.” She felt his hands squeezing her waist, it stung.

“You good.” He smiled at her. “You know how you can make it up to me?” His eyes darted through her body, she felt like puking. Okay, enough!

“Drinks!” She placed her hands on his shoulders, pushing him back. “We can drink, how about it?” 

He rolled his eyes. “Yeah, whatever. But after that, I need to have you .” He sounded creepy. A shiver runned down the girl’s spine. 

Matt grabbed their glasses, handing her one. Luckily, he was too distracted looking at her boobs to realize that the drink on his hands was still sizzling and slightly cloudy.

It was time. 

Jackie took a deep breath.

She leaned forward. “I know, and you know what? I have a thing for public play…” And whispered, before clinking their glasses. “Cheers.” She bit her lip to try and stop her disgusted face at the look in his eyes.

“Cheers…” He said under his breath, lifting his drink and chugging it down, making a face at the taste. Jackie followed, feeling the liquid burning her throat as she swallowed.

Before Matt could say - or do, anything, the girl grabbed his hand, pulling him through the crowd, across the dance floor, into the back door. The one that led to the parking lot.

The vibration of her body caused by the loud music had disappeared, now the only thing she  could hear was the quick steps - besides her own, and his heavy breathing in the back of her neck, as he explored her body with his hands. Jackie could’ve felt dirty or nauseous about his proximity, but she was too focused on finding the van.

“Hey, where are you taking me?” Matt’s voice was muffled from the wet kisses he left on the back of her neck. “Are you gonna murder me, or something?” He laughed, quick rat hands reached between her thighs through the fabric of her skirt. 

Jackie heard the back door opening again.

She grabbed the hand, turning around to face him, and consequently, behind him, still searching for the car. “I could, you know? You’re an easy target. Came all the way here, with a girl you barely know…” She tightened the grip around his wrist.

“Sure you could…” He mocked, rounding his free arm around her. Like fucking snakes. Again. “You’re a big, strong woman-” He squeezed. “And I’m just a defenseless man in your hands, right…? You could do anything you want to me.” An sinister smile grew on his face, Jackie shivered, feeling her heart stop for  a moment. 

Both of them knew who could murder who in that situation. And the fact that he held her so close as he said that - so tight, got her hands shaking, and her throat tightening. 

Where the fuck is the va- 

Two white lights flashed behind his back, and she felt relieved. There it was, a pitch black van. Tinted windows and a covered license plate. 

Couldn’t Misty think of an even more suspicious car? Fuck sake! 

Big eyes widened as he leaned closer to kiss her, a quick hand was placed between lips. “Uh- Answering your question!” She let out desperately. “To my car. I was taking you to my car.” She wore a taunting smile. “It’s parked right there.” 

Matt looked confused, but didn’t question it. He allowed himself to be dragged to the big black car.

“You drive a Van? It definitely doesn’t suit you.” He said as he watched her she slid the side door open. It was dark inside, he couldn’t see much. 

Jackie turned back to him, searching for any trace of unsteadiness in his stance, or anything about his voice.

“It’s my dad’s.” Shaky fingers unbuttoned his pants. He didn’t look dizzy at all, she was getting freaked out by the thought of having to do anything with that creep. “I drive around with this thing, just in case I encounter any adventures like this one… There’s a bunch of space here in the back, you know?” 

She swiftly turned their positions, by holding his waist by his belt loops, he pressed his eyes together. “Wait…” 

“What? You’re bitching out now?” She pushed him into the metal floor of the back truck. “You said you would fuck me, are you backing out?” She straddled his lap, placing a hand on his chest to hold him down.

“No, it’s not that…” His breathing got heavy, he could barely keep his eyes open. “I- I feel a little-” 

“What? Light headed?” A different voice came from the front seat.

“Dizzy?” Another, coming from behind Jackie. He tried to push the girl off his lap, or lift his head to look behind her.

He couldn’t. Matt’s head felt heavier than it should.

A covered hand grabbed his face, forcing him to look at them. His eyes were met by a covered face. A ski mask, covered by a white mesh and a pair of antlers on their head.

“Hey, calm down shorty…  We’ll take you somewhere nice, don't worry.” Their voice sounded familiar. “Not a room, tho…” 

Hands and feet felt numb as the ringing in his ears grew louder. Two other heads popped up in his sight. A bunny and what it looked like a parrot. 

He tried to move, to push away the hands squeezing his body, but it refused.

“B-hitch- What the fuck did you…” Corners of his vision were getting darker at every second. “Gave me…” 

Was what he could - weakly, spit out before passing out in the back of the van. 

[...] 

The hard ground pricked his bare back, and the chill of the night held him in a cold embrace as he tried to open his eyes. His brain refused to obey. 

Hands grabbed his jaw, forcing it open. 

“Where is it?” A familiar voice said, above him. 

“Here.” Another one, to his left.

“Give him two.” Behind. 

“Can’t we just-” A cold blade touched his covered crotch. 

“No.” 

Two small squared papers were placed on his tongue. It tasted a little bitter as it dissolved. He tried to move, to spit it out but he couldn’t. 

The only thing that seemed to wake his nervous system up, was the hard, stinging contact of a hand against his cheek. 

As he finally opened his eyes, regaining consciousness back - along with the control of his body, all he could see was the tall, thin trees being bathed by the yellowish moonlight and the eight attentive - hunting, eyes glued to his body. 

Four long, distorted and animalistic heads attached to one body, standing over him. Matt felt paralyzed again. 

He was caught by surprise when he heard his own weak voice. “Please-”  

“I think you should run-” All the heads said in unison. Their deep voices painfully vibrated on his eardrums as long limbs reached the floor. Four hands tightening their grip around silver blades. “- now.” 

Adrenaline filled his body as the creature split itself in four smaller bodies, surrounding him. Still a little off-balanced, Mattheo stood up and stumbled his first steps deeper into the woods, having his vision filled with dark shadows in the corners of his eyes and whispers in his ears.

He could feel some rocks prickling his bare feet as he dodged the moving trees and jumped their exposed roots crawling up the ground. The sound of his heavy breathing kept growing louder, in a way that he couldn’t hear the quick steps running after him. But that didn’t stop the creatures to make sure he knew they still tried to reach him. They were howling, like wolves. 

Growling and barking like wild animals.

Throat started to burn as the cold air - harshly inhaled, filled his lungs. It didn’t seem to be enough to make his head spin less, or stop hurting. The howling had stopped, just like the cracking of the leaves around the half-naked body, so he allowed his sore legs a break, slowing down gradually, leaning on a large tree and looking around to see if he could find any of the creatures. 

Nothing. 

Could’ve they lost him? Or maybe they gave up? Matt tried to calm down, but something in the back of his head screamed that it wasn't over yet. 

Just as the thought crossed his mind, a warm breath met the skin of his neck. He didn’t have the guts to turn around and face the one - or multiple, behind him, so he just closed his eyes. 

The presence had disappeared, perhaps it was his fear making him hear or see things. That made his tight muscles loosen up, and eyes open. Nothing but the dark of the night in sight. 

At least, not right in front of his face. 

In the farthest corner of his vision, almost completely hidden from sight, he could see a pair of immense wide eyes glaring at him, a growing, sharp smile as it realized he acknowledged its presence. 

Mattheo gulped as he gathered all the remaining stamina on his body to run again. Hairy legs couldn’t even get too far, when at the first tree a tall figure emerged. Large, bloody antlers slowly tilted as the head did the same. The guy managed to dodge it, turning to his left, only to be met by another blurry figure and its crooked beak. They were all around, surrounding him. The one with unnatural wide eyes, long ears and an disturbing smile to his right; the one with bloody antlers to his left and a feathered face in front of him. He could feel the blood disappearing from his face, the pumping heart tight on his throat and legs trembling as he realized one last thing:

He couldn’t see the fourth creature. 

The one that owned the biggest antlers, and the unbelievably light eyes - the ones he could’ve swore he'd seen before.  

He backed up as the three of them slowly walked over to him, praying that his back wouldn’t hit a tree trunk on his way back. Suddenly the creatures stopped, as a thin whistle reverberated through the trees. 

Then a complete silence, only the beating of his heart and his shaky breath reached his ears, as he felt the three pairs of eyes staring. 

Behind the uncanny faces, in the dark of the forest, two light dots moved. Getting quicker by the second, bigger. 

Closer. 

The fourth one was running towards him, heavy steps getting louder as it surpassed the trees. Matt’s steps back quickened, he didn’t want to face that thing. Before the creature reached the others, he misstepped, stumbling back and falling down a small hill.

“Holy shit…” A tall brunette said under her breath, as his body rolled down and stopped with a hard thump on a tree.

“That’s not how I planned it.” Natalie pulled her mask up. “These things aren’t even that scary… He’s such a pussy!”

“He’s probably having a bad trip.” Misty chuckled. 

“So, what do we do now?” Jackie played with her plastic knife. 

“I don’t know… Do we just- Leave him like that? Is he okay?” Lottie pulled her mask up as well, it was getting hot inside that thing. “I mean, I hate him, but-” She sighed. “I don’t know…” 

“We should check on him. Just to make sure, you know?” Natalie began to walk over to the edge of the small hill, when Misty stopped her. 

“I’ll do it!” She offered.

“We’re not gonna let you go alone.” The honey blonde spoke. “It’s too dark.” 

“No, it 's fine, I have a flashlight.” Misty said as she started to crawl down. “Besides, we have to take Lott home soon, before her parents notice how oddly still, she’s sleeping. You should go and gather all the stuff.” Brown eyes looked up at them through round glasses. “I’ll be quick, don’t worry.” 

“Misty-” Lottie sighed. “You know what? Okay, alright. But if anything happens, scream. We’ll come running to save you.” 

“That… Will not be necessary…” She started. “We’re dealing with a drugged man, who is scared shitless and probably thinks I’m some type of bird hybrid. I’m gonna be fine.” 

“Still, we’re in the middle of the woods. It’s filled with all kinds of animals and that’s dangerous.” 

“Lottie, we’re at the park. Like, children play hide and seek here everyday. There’s no real danger. In fact it barely has squirrels in here.” She pointed out, but the big brown eyes still had a hint of concern. “But yeah, I’ll make sure to scream for you to save me…” 

“Good, alright! See you in a bit.” Lottie said as the other two girls almost dragged her out of there. “Be careful!” 

Misty waved and waited until the three figures disappeared between the trees. She stopped her careful crawling and slid downhill, stopping next to the passed out body. She nudged him with her feet in search for any trace of consciousness. Not even a flinch.

She smiled. “Alright, we need to be quick, Misty.” She whispered as she slid a glove on and pulled the knife out of her yellow socks.

[...]

Pale fingers with dirty nails grabbed the handle, sliding the black door open. 

“Is he okay?” Natalie asked on the driver's seat, placing her mask on her lap.

“Yeah, he’s just passed out.” Misty said as she got in the van, sitting beside a sleepy Jackie.

“Great. Now let’s get the fuck out of here.” She said as the car started, and pulled away towards the road. 

The two girls at the front seats engaged in a conversation that Misty didn’t bother to pay attention to, she could only focus on the feeling of the little something she had her hands on.

Misty tightened her grip on the little ziplock she had in her pocket. 

The ziplock with Mattheo Saracusa’s hair.

When Misty Quigley was a little kid, she never had many friends. She wasn’t made for that. 

But she wanted to, desperately. 

And she tried - so hard, for years to be liked, to be loved,

to be seen .

Didn’t work. 

So Misty stopped. She stopped trying to be someone she wasn’t, someone she hated. All the failed attempts just wasted the time she should be dedicating on something else. 

This something, being the owner of little claws that scratch her throat everytime she opened her mouth to speak, the one that filled her brain and heart with ideas and thoughts that, even if nobody else gave a shit, it still would find it amusing. 

It wouldn’t be ashamed anymore. Never again. 

So she allowed the wild animal of her soul to love what it loved, to obsess over what it wanted to obsess over; And to love how it wanted - how it knew, to love.

So when the the gorgeous Northern Gannet looking girl, with her majestic blonde hair and blue eyes, walked over to her and asked about the bird she stared at out the window and didn’t care to listen her jabber around for minutes on end - when Natalie was the one to finally see her, and like her for who she was, she promised - mostly to herself, that she would protect that feeling - that acceptance, with her life. She would do anything to protect Natalie, and the ones that came along with her. 

Misty Quigley would do anything to keep her friends safe.

Which was what led her to stand in the middle of Collin Spencer’s dorm, with a bloody knife in - gloved, hands, and the guy’s lifeless body by her feet. 

One thing about Matt is that he isn’t really liked. Guess people can tell that he isn’t that great of a person - or a good one at all. So when it comes to having enemies, or people who would just love to get their hands around his neck and squeeze until his eyes rolled back and the color of his face faded away, Misty could fill in a ten page notebook with names - hers being the first on the list. 

But death sounded too good of a fate for such a disgusting human being. 

Not that she murdered a lot of people in her sixteen years of life, actually she just did it once, years before the 6ft tall guy laying on the floor, with two - still bleeding, wounds on his abdomen. 

The first one was this old lady she couldn’t remember the name of.

It wasn't her fault, Mom should know that, even if you’re a nurse with a five year old baby, you shouldn't bring your child to work. Even less, let her wander around the room of a ninety-three year old lady that was only alive thanks to the respirator beside her bed. The one which the plug cord was easy to trip over. 

The one that was turned off unintentionally. 

But, when she did intend, it wasn’t as hard as she thought it would be. Sure, it was scary at first, having to steal a student ID to get into the dorms; carefully stepping in a protection suit she got off the stockroom of the hospital her mom worked at, after pretending to visit Sandra just to give her a homemade lunch; and of course, stabbing the guy after he unexpectedly got out of the shower sooner than she thought he would. 

See, that wasn’t her plan. It was executed poorlier than she had anticipated. Collin and Matt had this weird hate relationship, and it was noticeable for the whole college how much they despised each other.

So when Misty found out that - for some reason, their dorms were right next to each other, the lightbulb on top of her head lit up so brightly, she feared people would be able to see the imaginary light. 

Is it too cliché to say that their whole beef began for a girl? Because it was exactly what it was. Men are that simple.

That pathetic. 

Misty didn’t dig deep enough to know what happened exactly, her attention was completely hooked by the fact that, at a stupid frat party that happened a couple of months ago, Matt and Collin had a fight. A pretty serious one.

For what she found online, even the police were involved. Guess having daddy to cover his shit up, didn’t do much when hundreds of people witnessed his little rage outbreak. The one that ended up with a knife stuck in one of the shoulders and death threats.

They handed her the entire plot on a silver platter.

It had mutual hate, witnesses of the fight and the confession of Matt’s wish to kill Collin - which was obviously a bluff, and the fact that no one would doubt that the guy did it. He tried before.

It was perfect.  

So there she was, leaving the room in the middle of the night after strategically spreading some strands of his hair around the room, - double, triple checking if there was anybody or any cameras, seeing or recording her -, with the bloody coverall, knife and Matt’s clothes - carefully put inside a plastic bag, on her backpack and a ginger wig on her head. The same one that laid on Jackie’s earlier that night.

Misty walked over thirty minutes to where her bike was chained to, and biked over to where a half-naked Mattheo Saracusa was passed out.

Wearing gloves, she took the knife out of the plastic bag, grabbing his hands and tightening around the handle. She made sure to drag his nails on the dirt floor later on, it needed to seem like he dug the ground with his bare hands.

She dug a small hole a couple of miles where his body laid, and placed the weapon and his bloody clothes inside it. Making sure to make it quite easy to be found in a couple of weeks.

She stood beside the man, taking one more look at her work. ‘ I’m such a great friend!’ A smile grew on her lips as the thought crossed her mind. 

That was it. Job done, no turning back anymore. 

Natalie’s plan was… okay, to say the least. But it wouldn’t stop him, and Misty needed that man gone. 

Definitively.

Her lungs filled with satisfaction as she breathed in the stinging cold air one last time, before hopping on her bike again and heading home. 

That night, Misty Quigley played God. She was justice itself, incarnated in a teenage girl’s body, fearlessly walking around.

She liked that. 

A bit more than she should.