Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Flashes of blinding lights.

Shouts and screams filling in the venue.

Karina mustered up her signature smile, dark eyes sparkling against the numerous flashes being directed towards her. Her bold red lipstick matched with her long red dress, cascading down in waves. Her hair was as dark as midnight, flowing down past her shoulders. The moonlight shone on her figure, making her glow as elegance filled each and every move she made. Black stilettos made a muted clicking sound along the red carpet.

An epitome of grace and allure.

One would be down to their knees just to be near her.

Just by her presence alone, there were already numerous headlines being made for they worshipped such a divine beauty of Karina Yu herself.

At the end of the walkway, a large hand reached out for her, its palm facing forward. Her dark eyes made contact with certain obsidian eyes, glinted with knowing familiarity. Her lashes fluttered in the bright lights, gaze hardened enough to hide whatever emotions laid deep within. With poised confidence, she reached for that hand, her fingers brushing against the palm which earned a slight curl of smile from the owner of the said hand.

Christopher Bang, also known as Bangchan.

He is the partner of Karina Yu in the latest action and psychological drama that they were in. Bangchan had a tall, well-proportioned frame with broad shoulders and tapered torso that were enhanced more by his well tailored suit, its colours matching Karina’s dress itself. His posture was upright and imperturbable as he led her towards their designated seats.

As the award ceremony went on, Karina took a deep breath, closing her eyes. The moment her eyes fluttered open, a certain enchanting glint present in her gaze.

Karina Yu was a rising actor. 

In her first three years of acting career, she had received numerous awards which made her easily well-known to other senior actors and actresses. Just in a short span of time, she made her name known and it was effortless due to her talent dripping along with such an alluring beauty—she’s all the whole industry talked about. Her latest drama project with Bangchan unsurprisingly blew up too, thus making them both an impactful figure in the industry to the point numerous brands were wanting to take them as ambassadors.

“I’ll have to pick up a call. It’s quite urgent.” Bangchan’s voice was reduced in a whisper as he leaned close to her side, close enough for her to hear him amidst the booming voice of the MC at the stage yet sufficient to leave some space just in case she was uncomfortable. “You sure you’ll be okay?”

She nodded in response. “Don’t worry about me.”

As Bangchan’s figure vanished behind the closed door, the lights slowly diminished to leave everyone in complete darkness. Soon enough, the spotlight shone to the centre of the stage to reveal a male singer. His smooth, velvety voice filling in the venue, enough to melt one’s ears upon hearing him.

Nothing really came to her mind as she enjoyed the performance. However, her peace was cut short by the sudden vibration inside her handbag. It wasn’t that apparent but she, who had always been sensitive to these kinds of things, managed to notice. Casting a discreetly watchful glance around her, she angled her phone closer to her before unlocking it, afraid if her privacy would be invaded by some prying parties.

It was a text from Bangchan.

Your manager is asking me about you. He wants you to meet him backstage.

It was odd. 

Her manager could have just texted her personally without asking Bangchan to relay the message to her. Her bottom lip was drawn into her teeth—a subconscious habit she would do whenever she was confused and restless. Her facade slightly broke apart without she realised it herself.

Then another text from him.

He said it’s urgent.

And that was enough for her to sneakily slip out of the venue, mindful to not draw any attention that could ruin the flow of the ceremony. After a few eye contacts and shared polite smiles, she managed to reach the backstage except that it was oddly deserted. Most of the crews and staff were scattered at the side of the stage and around the venue which left the hallway empty. Her stilettos echoed throughout the hallway whilst accompanied by the slightly muffled music.

Her steps were slow and careful even as she reached the end of the hallway, eyes searching for a certain familiar face.

She found none.

Then she felt a brush of a hand on her bare shoulder. The goosebumps it brought on her skin was enough for her to turn around—albeit a bit shakily due to the fact that she was caught off guard. However, what greeted her line of sight only made her brows furrowed deeper.

Her phone in her grip vibrated. Someone was calling her.

Standing before her was a tall man probably in his early twenties. His face was slightly familiar, which she initially assumed they had crossed paths before presumably once or twice. He had defined features and a kind smile. His bright blond hair enunciated his innocent appearance.

“Noona.”

A step closer.

Despite the confusion, she stepped back. Her phone stopped vibrating.

“Do I know you?” Her tone remained poised and amiable, though there was underlying caution beneath. A smile was casted towards him, albeit a bit forced.

Her phone vibrated again.

Something was wrong.

He did not reply yet she noticed the way his eyes slowly trailed down. Just by his gaze alone, she was aware of the hidden malicious intent of what he was about to do to her. He pursed his lips, his gaze meeting hers again. It was infuriating how she felt deeply humiliated and violated just by the way he was looking at her.

The air shifted and she could sense the palpable tension between them. Her palm started to become sweaty to which she had to grip tighter onto her phone to avoid it from slipping off. 

“You’re prettier up close.” His voice went slightly deeper, almost drowned out by the bass of the music but the effect he had on her was suffocating. She could feel her breath quickening and her brain short-circuited. “Noona, do you find me attractive?”

Her phone buzzed incessantly and at this point, it was as if warning her of impending doom.

Would she garner attention if she screamed right at this moment?

Screw it.

Despite her trembled legs, she forced them to run. A sharp pain jolted into her ankles due to the sudden surge of the force being put onto the stilettos and her dress restricted her movement in quite an infuriating amount. It was to no surprise that she was easily being caught in no time, a hand gripping harshly onto her luscious raven locks thus effectively making her stumble back and end up twisting her right ankle.

Her back collided against his front but before she could do anything, a cloth was being pressed onto her nose and mouth. Her mind went hazy in such a short amount and her vision became more blurry each time she blinked. Despite the panic coursing through her veins, her body seemed to have a mind of its own as they became weaker and weaker, her limbs dropping limp and she could barely feel anything.

Was this the end?

The last thing she registered was the distant scream but she could barely recognize whether it was her own weakened whimper or it belonged to someone else. She attempted to fight the last bits of her consciousness and it was hard—to the point it was excruciatingly painful. Her teary eyes caught a flash of brown hair and a blurry face before darkness fully gave in.

Maybe this was how her demise would be.

How pitiful.

***

Karina’s eyes fluttered open only to be blinded by the fluorescent lights. Squinting her eyes, she took her time adjusting to the light before glancing around. Her fingers caught the soft fabric of the blanket, making her realise that she was currently lying on a bed. She sat upright in an instant, ignoring the black dots and the lightheadedness raiding her soon after the sudden movement she made.

Memories rushed through her and in an instant. Panic filled her veins. Did that guy manage to kidnap her? Tears pricked her eyes, the waves of the past started to hit her, drowning her deeper into the sea of unknown. She heaved a shaky breath, barely containing her emotions.

The click of a door brought her back to reality. She was thinking of throwing the closest thing around her towards the door—which was unfortunately, a soft fluffy pillow—but the moment a woman wearing a nurse uniform entered, her mind went blank in an instant. All the thoughts vanished like smoke and she sat there dumbly.

The nurse seemed stunned upon seeing Karina staring at her. Well, who wouldn’t? An epitome of grace and beauty was staring back at you with such dishevelled hair and tears streaming down her face as if you were the one who was making her cry.

“Are you…okay?”

Karina blinked. The remaining tears felt warm as they cascaded down her cheeks.

“Where am I?”

“You’re in the hospital.” The nurse came closer this time, reaching the side of the bed. “Someone was trying to kidnap you by using chloroform. Thankfully you didn’t receive any harmful effects from it.”

Karina went quiet, trying to process the information. The nurse went to check her vitals, her touch was gentle and light as she let a moment of silence fly by. 

What happened to that blond man? How did she end up here? Was Bangchan involved in this? There were a lot of questions arising in her mind yet Karina knew, the nurse didn’t have any capability of providing the answer she seeked for.

Thankfully enough, after the nurse left, her manager trudged in. Distress painting his features, the collar of his white shirt was slightly askew and even his footsteps sounded incredibly heavy to her ears. She gnawed on her lower lip, knowing this issue could shock the whole industry if the reporters even got a glimpse of this. Everything would go downhill in a blink of an eye. Her title would be at stake, her career would be on the line and more than anything, her dignity at some point would be easily stomped on.

As much as people admire her, there were twice as many who would not hesitate to taint her.

“Bangchan is in the next room.” Were the first thing leaving her manager’s lips. Before she could ask anything, he beat her to it. “He was unconscious at the bathroom stall when we found him and his phone went missing.”

“What about the blond-haired guy?”

“You kidnapper?” Upon receiving a confirmation nod from her, he continued. “He was unconscious too when we found him.”

“Pardon me?”

“You didn’t beat him up into a pulp, did you?”

She frowned at the oddly accusatory tone in his voice.

“Do you think I am fully capable of doing that?”

Silence.

She had a point.

He pursed his lips. Then a sigh, the one that seemed to drain every fibre of his being.

“We found his body at the storeroom near the spot where you blacked out. His whole face was full of blood and bruises. No one recognized him if it’s not for his ID. I thought that he was a victim too if it’s not for Bangchan who claimed that he was knocked out by him.”

One question stayed unanswered.

“Did someone beat him up?”

“Presumably yes.” A forced smile from her manager. “We have yet to find that person.”

It seemed like her question would remain unsettled for the time being.

Two weeks after that incident and no one really knew who her saviour was. Bangchan had barged into her ward soon after knowing that she was awake, an array of apologies escaped his lips upon finding out how the kidnapper had been aiming for Karina in the first place. Her manager had been restless ever since then. After all, this involved the safety of both Bangchan and Karina and the companies were having endless meetings regarding this concerning matter.

Despite that, no one bothered to find her saviour.

The kidnapper ended up receiving quite a heavy sentence—which was a good thing considering it would take Karina a lot to recover from that traumatic experience—and the management of both companies decided to increase the security for Karina’s and Bangchan’s sake. However, no one even questioned how her kidnapper was badly hurt when they found her.

It was like a fleeting dream.

Karina swore she saw a glimpse of brown hair before she passed out. But the blurriness of her vision was infuriatingly annoying. Despite her effort of going to the place where the ceremony was held just to see the CCTV footage, it was all in vain. There was no trace of the footage in the first place. 

How absurd would that be?

The more Karina tried to search for her saviour, the more everything seemed to be futile.

“You seem restless.”

“Maybe I am.”

Ruby lips stretched into a smile. Burgundy nails drummed against the surface of the table.

“Relax Jimin. There’s no one else here.”

Jimin held back a sigh, pressing her lips into a thin line as she skillfully cut the steak into smaller bite sized pieces. Her dark eyes were void of emotions but she was well aware the person sitting across her could figure her out just fine. Unchinaga Aeri was that woman—one of the few who knew Karina on a deeper level due to their history together.

Uchinaga Aeri was the COO of Ellis Entertainment (which was the company Jimin worked at) and also Jimin’s best friend from their university days. No one ever called Karina by her real name and Aeri obviously proved to be an exception.

“I kind of wish that we could have a bit more…normal setting instead of this.” Karina’s deep voice was a stark contrast to the soft jazz music played in the background. They were currently at the five-star restaurant located at the one of the luxurious hotels in Seoul Aeri had booked beforehand.

“Well, that’s the thing. You’re not normal in the first place, Yu.” Aeri shrugged her shoulders, one hand reached to unbutton her grey suit as her other hand reached out for the glass of water, fingers rested at the base. Deep brown eyes meet Jimin’s onyx ones. “Considering your rising popularity, I doubt you can eat normally when all the customers here have their eyes on you. You should be thankful I booked this whole place for your privacy and peace.”

It was true.

Coming here without being noticed was hard enough. She stepped into the hotel lobby in sweatpants and baggy shirt with round glasses, a mask and a bucket hat to complete her whole disguise. The staff had to take a good look at her just to make sure that she was indeed Karina Yu before they let her in. Aeri on the other hand had just finished a meeting with a few shareholders which was why her clothes were better compared to Jimin.

“Do you have any update regarding the incident?” Jimin went straight to the point, her voice had a hint of authority in which Aeri knew better than to not joke around.

“Nothing that I knew of. I heard from your manager that you went to visit the venue to view the CCTV footage.”

“It was deleted. Maybe he was planning all of this beforehand.” That thought alone didn’t sit well with her. Knowing how meticulous his plan was, she didn’t know what her fate would be if her saviour didn’t manage to save her on time. 

“Are you sure it’s not the other way around?”

Jimin couldn’t help but frown. The steak was half finished when she decided to put down the utensils, leaning her back against the seat. “What are you implying?”

“It’s either that or…the one who saved you was the one who discarded the footage. Seeing how this person managed to leave no trace, it could be possible that this is their doings.” Aeri took a sip of the water, her movement was sophisticated and calculated as ever. “That stupid blondie’s face was literally ruined. If your saviour was caught, they would be held accountable for what they had done, even though their intention was probably just to save you.”

Aeri’s words stayed in her mind longer than she was willing to admit. Even as she settled on the bed with warm blankets on her, her mind drifted away to a certain brown-haired person. She wondered whether they intended to save her or they had other ulterior motives. One would not be going as far as ruining someone’s face just because they were attempting to kidnap people…right? Well, unless it's someone they knew.

She would most definitely go berserk too if someone tried to kidnap her family members.

The only plausible reason was her saviour was someone close to her.

That brought out another question; who?

Chapter Text

Jimin knew that stare.

The gaze was deep and dark, full of malicious intent behind that quietness of it all. Jimin sat at the furthest corner of the table yet she could feel a pair of eyes raking every inch of her body from across the table. She slightly shifted in her seat, crossing her legs. Discreetly, she pulled her beige twill jacket close to her, covering as much as she could.

She wasn’t that foreign upon being looked like that, unfortunately.

The dinner went relatively smoothly. It was just a casual company dinner to welcome the new hires but it seemed like this new intern had quite an atrocious way of admiring Jimin. His gaze was overwhelming despite him being casual about it. He knew how to make it subtle apparently, seeing how most of the people here did not even notice his slightly lingering gaze on Jimin.

Jimin was just clad in a white turtleneck but his gaze alone was enough for her to be aware that he might have undressed her already in his mind. She bit her lower lip, feeling uncomfortable by that passing thought. And if her fingers slightly trembled as she reached for the piece of meat, she feigned indifference.

On a normal occasion she would have probably confronted him right away, but this day was different.

This day was her mum’s death anniversary. 

By that means, she spent at least an extra hour in the morning just to get up because the hollowness was apparent, almost swallowing her whole to the oblivion if she wasn’t aware enough and she barely ate anything after visiting her mum’s grave—except for this night because she felt bad rejecting the offer from Yeji, the marketing manager. 

She carried the grief along with her for the whole day (this wasn’t her first rodeo but the pain overwhelmed her each time her gaze settled on her mum’s tombstone) and at this moment, it seemed like the world didn’t plan to have mercy on her by throwing her straight into a lion’s den.

She was waiting for an Uber when it happened.

A warm hand slipped into hers made her jolt in surprise. She flinched away but the hand had quite a grip on her. By the time she turned around, her heart dropped down to her stomach.

It was that intern.

“What are you doing—”

He pushed her further into the secluded corner, away from the prying eyes. They ended up in a dingy alleyway near the restaurant. Its lack of light caused her heartbeat to fasten, threatening to rip out of the ribcage. She attempted to release his grip on her but his other hand clutched onto her shoulder, nails pressing into the fabric. She winced, feeling his nails dug into her skin.

“ Shh , be quiet.”

Damn it . She should have accepted Yeji’s offer to bring her home.

A scream left her lips but he was fast to silence it by punching her rib. A pained gasp left her lips, wishing that his punch wasn’t strong enough to break her bones.

She struggled against him, knowing things could escalate worse especially when there was no one looking. His glint beneath the shadows was terrifying, something that could be as close as a demon could be and his smile was sickening, as if he knew he could have all of herself if he wanted to. His large figure was way stronger than her obviously, leaving her breathless as he pushed her against the wall.

Tears pricked her eyes, aware that she couldn’t do much to save herself.

She despised being under the mercy of the demon— that just meant that she was utterly helpless. Fear overwhelmed her, drowning her deeper into the raging sea of emotions.

Please help me.

It was a desperate plea that went unspoken. She wondered if it could ever be granted, knowing how futile it could be, like watering the wilted flower. Beneath the lone moon above, she fought alone to survive, using every bit of her energy left.

With a rush of adrenaline and the last bits of her energy, she kicked him in the shin. It seemed to be enough for him to drop down on his knees, whimpering in pain but his other hand was fast to grip onto her ankle—the one that had just recovered from the incident at the awards ceremony.

The side of her head collided against the empty glass bottles. Some of them ended up crashing against the wall and broke into pieces. Thankfully, the broken ones were far from her face, but the pain would surely leave a bruise later on.

She didn’t know how he was damned fast because the next thing she knew he was attempting to pounce on her. Due to the desperation and the remaining adrenaline that led her brain to be in a fight or flight response, her hand reached whatever they could reach for, in this case it was the bottle, and she crashed it straight onto his head. The shards flew out across the place, some managed to graze her forehead near the edge of her right eyebrow.

She coughed—near to hyperventilate when she found herself not being able to breathe normally. Her chest tightened and her heartbeat painstakingly loud against her ribcage. A breathless gasp left her lips as she gripped onto her chest. His motionless body became a sheer reminder of her impulsive doings, unmoving like a corpse. Her pupils dilated, fearing if she hit him hard enough for him to be dead.

Regret swept over her. Her mind was reeling as the grave nature of the situation began to dawn on her.

The world was cruel.

Even as she wept alone, accompanied by the motionless body of the perpetrator and the echoing call of cicadas far away, life felt ruthlessly indifferent. Her beige twill jacket was dirty, but her white turtleneck was in even worse shape, stained with dirt and with a tear on the side of her neck. 

She doubted the world would grieve upon her woeful fate.

People would never see her beyond her looks and body—she was well aware of that fact alone. But that didn’t mean it hurt less everytime she was being sexualised. A victim, that was all she ever was ever since then.

You’re lucky you’re pretty, at least people will like you.

Must have been nice to wake up and be pretty, right?

I wish to have your face, it’s like winning a lottery for life.

Men would be lined up just to have a relationship with you.

But they never knew her struggles. All the unpleasant stares that lingered longer on her body, the backhanded compliments laced with false authenticity and the inappropriate vulgar words being thrown towards her—she had to live like that for all of her life, for as long as she’s breathing and it hurts more upon realising that she could never be loved with such fervent genuineness, being enveloped in love so gentle and tender that it made her cry, in a good way.

This face was what made her to be in this state. This face was what made everyone chase her. This face was what made her miserable.

If she wished to not be born with this face, would she finally be worthy of love then?

She caught something moving at the corner of her eyes. Her disoriented state dulled her senses, causing her not to notice the approaching figure until they were close enough to her. Her blurry vision caused by the pooling tears only noticed the boots stopping right beside her. 

As she glanced up, the tears cascaded down due to her movement, enough for her to take in the black trench coat, pale white skin and black messy hair that stopped right above her shoulders. The place lacked light and she could barely catch any details. Those eyes however, were empty and void of life as they stared back at Jimin’s pained ones.

All Jimin wanted to do was cry. The sobs lodged in her throat, begging her to let them out.

There was a slight rustle as the woman crouched down on the same level as her. Jimin was petrified, the shock that pulsing through her veins was enough to paralyse every fibre of her being. She flinched when she felt cold hands reaching for her clammy ones. She didn’t realise the shards in her trembled hand nor did she register the trickling blood dripping from it—until the woman unfurled her palm and dropped the broken glass.

As the shard fell to the ground with an audible tinkling sound, all Jimin could register was how the woman’s touch was as gentle as ever.

“Can you walk?”

The woman’s voice was surprisingly soft, carrying a soothing blend of warmth and sincerity. And Jimin’s mind went completely blank. It took her time to properly register everything but her silence seemed to speak volume which the woman seemed to understand that Jimin was not in the right mind to articulate any coherent response.

“Can I carry you home?”

Home.

All she wanted was to go home.

Upon that thought, a sob involuntarily left her trembled lips. Tears gently streaming down her face. Her left hand reached to wipe her face—a futile attempt when the tears seemed endless and she couldn’t just stop crying.

“I’ll carry you. Tell me if it hurts.”

It was almost effortless for the woman to have Jimin on her back and Jimin would have been impressed if it’s not for the fact that her mind was slowly detaching itself from reality. The air was cold and as the breeze blew into the open wound on her palm, it stung just a little bit. Her rib slightly hurt but the woman was taking slow and careful steps which made the pain bearable.

Maybe it was the exhaustion of the situation or maybe it was because of the grief, but her eyelids were getting droopy and sleepiness slowly catching up to her. Her breathing evened out as the burdens of the world gradually melted away.

Just like that, she was asleep.

***

The digital clock displayed two in the morning when a phone that was placed beside it began to light up. The soft, rhythmic tapping of a laptop keyboard stopped, leaving ample space for silence to take over the office room. Deep brown eyes glanced at the screen.

Karina Yu.

Without any hesitation, Aeri accepted the call.

“What’s up?”

“Your contact name was on the recent log calls.”

Aeri’s brows furrowed upon registering a different voice. This was certainly not Jimin. Panic started to grow the more confusion took over her. She ran a hand through her locks, trying to stabilise her voice. She didn’t want to appear restless, not when she didn’t know the person on the other side had a good intention or not.

“Why do you have her phone?”

“Someone was trying to harm her and I brought her to my place because she seemed traumatised. Don’t worry, I'll take care of her. The man that tried to harm her was somehow injured. I’ll text you the details of where the incident took place so please handle him accordingly. If anything I want him to receive punishment for making your friend in such an unpleasant condition.”

Aeri could barely have time to process the whole sentence when the person on the other line added, “She will contact you once she is awake. By then, I’ll be responsible for her.”

The call ended.

What the heck…

Aeri could sense the impending headache just by this whole thing alone.

A notification popped up, consisting of the details of an address.

“Who the hell even dares to mess with Jimin. I swear I’ll rip their heads off…”

With a swipe of a finger, she instantly placed the phone to her ear. She bit her lip, feeling anxiousness pooling in.

“Hey Jake, I know you’re still not sleeping. I need you to take care of something for me. Yeah, it’s quite urgent…”

***

As Jimin’s eyes fluttered open, the first thing she registered was hunger pooling in her stomach and the pain across her whole body. Vanilla scent enveloped her whole. The powder blue duvet grounded her whole, its warmth was enough to ease her senses. As her gaze raked across the room, she couldn’t shake off the fact that it felt foreign.

On her left, she noticed a small bedside table with full-rimmed rectangle glasses and an illuminated bedside lamp, its gentle hue filling in the darkness. At the corner of the room, there was a black classical guitar placed on the guitar stand and at the opposite wall from the bed, a small desk was filled with scattered papers and an open laptop.

The room itself was small but comfy enough for a person to sleep. Noticing the closed blinds, she assumed it was nighttime already from the lack of natural light. That brought out a question; how long had she been sleeping?

She blinked the weariness away, heaving a sigh as she shifted into a sitting position. Her right palm was wrapped in a bandage and from the sight itself, it seemed to be a meticulous and neat work as if it was not the first time they did this kind of thing. She noticed that she wasn’t wearing the clothes from the last time and instead, clad in a pair of pyjamas.

She mustered up her energy to leave the bed and went out. The aching across her body was bearable, not too much to the point that she couldn’t walk and the memories from the last incident rushed back to her. Her steps halted soon after she got out of the room, her gaze settled on certain hazel eyes.

Now that there had been ample light, Jimin could finally take in the appearance of the woman that was currently sitting on the sofa. Her gaze was the same as the previous night, void of any emotions and her hair was in fact not black, but auburn shade with hints of copper tones. Her skin was as pale as snow and her features were gently sculpted with high cheekbones and defined jawline—and she was incredibly attractive, something that definitely caught Jimin off guard because she didn’t expect her to be this good-looking. 

“I’m sorry for undressing you without your permission but your clothes were quite dirty and…ruined, I can’t just let you sleep in that condition.”

Jimin blinked. The woman’s voice was still as soft as she remembered. Embarrassment pooled in her gut upon realising the fact that the woman had undressed her while she was asleep. Just how the heck did she manage to be asleep like a log?

“How long have I been asleep?” Her voice had a slight gentle rasp in it. Her voice had always been deep but there’s just a certain tinge of huskiness that made her question whether she only fell asleep or was hibernating.

The woman’s reply came in a heartbeat, “Two days.”

Oh.

Jimin’s lips parted, letting the silence take over the place as she waited for the woman to say ‘just joking’ or even anything to imply that she was pulling on Jimin’s leg. Alas it never came. 

She stared at the woman. 

The woman stared back at her.

“Don’t…don’t joke.”

“I’m not.”

It seemed that this woman in front of Jimin wasn’t much of a talker. Her words were simple and concise without any kind of explanation which left Jimin with nothing but an array of puzzlement. Just like that Jimin stood there like a statue, not really knowing what to do.

After a beat of silence, Jimin asked, “What time is it?”

“It’s almost one o’clock.” Then a pause. As if the woman knew what Jimin was thinking, she added, “In the morning.”

“Why aren’t you sleeping?”

“I don’t sleep.” Came her court reply.

“Why?”

“Can’t.”

Jimin licked her lips, testing the waters with another, “Why?”

“Amnesia.”

Jimin blinked.

Did she say that as a joke or…that must have been a joke right? But her tone sounded serious though.

“Perhaps…do you mean to say insomnia?”

There was a small ‘oh’ escaping from her lips followed by a slow nod. “Yeah, that.”

Then silence. 

Jimin stared at her. 

She stared back at Jimin, her hazel eyes bored into Jimin’s soul. Jimin gulped down the lump in her throat, anxiousness slowly pooling in her stomach.

“Pardon me for asking, but it seems that you often have problems with men, correct?”

Jimin stilled at the question. For a second it felt like the woman was figuring her out but at the same time, Jimin found it hard to find out what the woman was thinking. She could never cross past that lifeless gaze. It seemed way too empty for anything.

“What do you mean?”

“The other day, at the awards ceremony.”

Chapter Text

Jimin frowned, wondering whether she should be wary of the woman before her.

This woman seemed to know something. And whatever intentions she had, Jimin was terrified if the woman saved her just for the sake of using her.

“How do you know?”

“I worked part time as a production staff there.”

All the production staff were scattered across the venue. The chance of this woman present at the site of an incident was very slim, except for a few circumstances of course but as far as she knew, the only people present there were just a few guards, Bangchan’s manager and also her manager.

“There were barely any witnesses.” Jimin paused. Her confidence diminished for some reason the moment she noticed that a pair of hazel eyes were staring straight at her, intently listening. “W-Well, as far as I know of.”

“Come.” A pat at the side of the sofa. “You’re gonna get tired standing there—”

“Why should I?” The response was faster than a heartbeat and by the time she fully registered her words that she finally realised how impolite that would be. 

She was about to apologise but ended up being star-struck when the woman’s lips slightly quirk up into a small smile, thus effortlessly shifting the atmosphere of the whole place. Jimin bit her lower lip, feeling embarrassment rushing through her whole body. She timidly made her way to the sofa, sitting at the other side which left quite a hefty amount of space between them—it was funny if there was anyone witnessing this.

“Are you okay?”

The unexpected question made Jimin snap her head to the side.

“Yeah…yeah, I’m okay. It’s fine.” She clasped her hands together, glancing down to the floor.

It felt odd, having someone asking that question directly. Sure it was common to receive those words but knowing how the woman was the one to witness her in the lowest somehow didn’t sit well with her. It was uncomfortable.

“Glad to know you’re fine.”

“I’m sorry for causing you trouble. It must have been a hassle to bring me home due to my…undesirable state that night.”

“It wasn’t.” Jimin’s gaze settled on the woman’s hazel eyes, noting the lack of emotions within.  “You’re not a burden.”

Jimin’s lips parted as the words she constructed somehow jumbled in her head. As a result, nothing came out of her lips. She ended up heaving a small sigh before shaking her head.

“Don’t say words you don’t mean.”

“I wouldn’t say it if I didn't mean it in the first place.”

Again, Jimin was left speechless.

All the words being said to her, she never really knew the depth of the sincerity due to how many people around her tried to get the most out of her without any hint of genuineness. Sure she had some who loved her as she was but then again, being in this industry made her learn that showing her true self could lead to her being stabbed in the back. 

Her fans that loved her for various reasons—maybe they loved her endless passion in acting, her marvellous way of portraying how the main character of the story should be or her appealing features and attractive demeanour. They fell in love with who Karina Yu was. Her confidence, her gracious charms and her enigmatic way of enthralling people just by barely doing anything. It was effortless even, how people’s gaze would magnetise towards Karina Yu, as if the whole world revolved around her alone. The conversations would hang mid-air, the silence that filled the room was nothing but pure respect and admiration.

Karina Yu never wore her heart on a sleeve. Her sharp gaze and demanding aura was enough for people to kneel before her.

But Yu Jimin—she was different .

Yu Jimin was full of flaws, bruises and wounds. She was scared, insecure and quite hopeless. Sure, her smiles were exorbitant, sometimes it could bring a smile to someone’s face and her carefree spirit was delightful, to which at a certain point one could taste a little bit of freedom just by being close to her. But her flaws would make her draw away from most people who were trying to be close to her. Her insecurities were loud sometimes, pricking onto her mind and engulfing her if she wasn’t careful enough. Her bad experience with people made her wary of even the slightest kind gesture they did.

Yu Jimin would always hide behind the mask of Karina Yu because it was safer that way. People wanted the confident, bold and poised Karina Yu. So to the world, she presented the Karina Yu just like how they wanted to. Why? Yu Jimin was obviously a burden. She remembered her father’s troubled gaze upon finding out how she had hurt one of her classmates, how hatred and malice were present on her peers’ gaze every single time she made eye contact with them.

They never explicitly say it out loud.

But she was a burden to her father that had to pay hospital charges of the injured student, she was a burden to her mother that had to find a new school for her to transfer to, she was a burden to her homeroom teacher that was involved in the case regarding Jimin and her injured classmate.

And yet this woman claimed that she wasn’t a burden—it was outright a lie. It had to be.

Jimin couldn’t help but laugh, her voice sounded light and airy.

“That’s the funniest thing I’ve heard today.”

The woman didn’t prod more, probably deciding to end the topic up until this point. There was a short silence followed by a small rustle, wherein Jimin noticed that the woman had probably shifted in her seat when she felt the side of the sofa slightly dipped.

“It must have been tough.”

Jimin turned her head, only to see the woman had her head against the headrest, hazel eyes directly staring at her. She didn’t know whether it was the exhaustion of the whole situation or just her drowsiness blurring her rational thoughts, but she found her resolutions crumbling beneath that gaze.

“Can you tell?” Her voice sounded oddly vulnerable, which she kind of hated the depth of its rawness. It was so unlike herself to showcase her own deepest fears to people so easily. But then again, this woman had witnessed Jimin at her lowest. “Sorry, it’s just…no one ever sees me past my looks. That often brings me trouble.”

The woman’s gaze was unreadable as she replied, “Should I kill them?”

Jimin’s lips stretched into a smile before a soft laugh left her lips. Jimin just found it funny with the way the woman spoke with absolute certainty and confidence. They were both women after all, Jimin had lived her life long enough to know they were nothing but victims for those wicked men. But still, the thought counts and Jimin appreciated that.

The air around them shifted. It was slightly amicable, slightly welcomed. The certain emotionless gaze on her didn’t feel that distant anymore. There was this certain glint that seemed to pull Jimin in, and it was purely harmless for Jimin to indulge. The woman wasn’t here to harm her, that much she knew.

“Maybe you can just go as far as breaking them. I don’t want to see your face in the news headlines for a murder, it’ll be a shame.”

“Don’t worry, I'm just planning to return his favour.”

Jimin raised an eyebrow, a small smile playing on her lips. She didn’t know what prompted her to lean her head against the backrest, but she was getting comfortable with the woman’s presence. “Yeah? Enlighten me.”

“Forehead, shoulder, rib…” Jimin’s face flushed upon being reminded that the woman had seen her body…well, technically . The woman’s gaze then fell onto her injured hand. “The palm of your hand.” Their gaze met again. “I’ll make sure to hurt him at the same spot he hurt you.”

Jimin looked deeply into hazel eyes, searching for anything that could imply any jest. Nil. Only genuineness was clear in that gaze.

“You’re ambitious.”

“It’s the least I could do.” Then a pause. “I’m sorry for not coming earlier.”

Jimin averted her gaze away. A smile on her lips slightly strained. She wondered what kind of good deeds she had done to have this woman right here so concerned for her. The way the woman said those words made it seem like they had known each other for years, as if it was her responsibility to take care of Jimin. But that was the issue wasn’t it? Jimin could see the slight hint of regret pooling beneath the indifference facade the woman had when in fact, they were nothing but strangers. It was not the woman’s fault. 

And more than anything, Jimin just found it ironic how her own manager barely had a guilty look on him whenever she faced…unforeseen circumstances like this one.

“You’ve done more than others could capable of.”

And it was true.

The prospect of being cared for, it was foreign. She was used to being left alone, tending her own wounds inflicted by others. People who worked alongside her only cared for her just because it was their job—something that was obligatory in their line of work. She was perfectly aware of that small piece of information, already too used to doing things by herself. For as long as she lived, genuineness was just that hard to find, almost nonexistent even considering all the glimmering deceits and pretence filling in every nook and corners of life itself.

Yet this woman sitting right beside her somehow exceeded even Jimin’s own prospect of bonafides. A person who didn’t seem troubled to take care of Jimin despite the cold exterior she had. Even if this was Jimin’s first and last meeting with her, Jimin was sure that the woman’s presence would be indelibly etched in her memory, like an ink drawned on the skin.

“May I have your name?”

Disbelief painted Jimin’s features. “Wait, all this time and you don’t even know me?”

“Not really. But I have seen you before, here and there.”

“Here and there?”

“Advertisements…cosmetic stores…maybe on some headers around the city.”

“...That’s all?”

A nod.

“Don’t you have something else to tell me?”

There was no sort of recognition nor familiarity present in those hazel eyes, which bewildered Jimin more than anything. This woman didn’t know who Jimin was—that was just absurd !

A shake of a head, followed by her soft voice, “Your name, please.”

Jimin’s starting to think this woman beside her was a bundle of obliviousness with extra bits of peculiarity. She gnawed onto her lower lip, eyes were clear with distrust and conflict. Amidst that, the woman’s hazel eyes were settled on her, ever so emotionless and obscure. It took her a whole minute to finally reply and if the woman was getting impatient, it was barely visible from her features.

“Yu Jimin.”

A slow nod.

“ Winter .”

***

Black platform shoes made contact with the tiles beneath, eliciting clear clacking sound echoing throughout the hallway. Jimin’s expression was unreadable the moment her call was directed to voicemail. She tried to call again only to end up the same. She frowned, feeling confused more than anything.

It had been her fifth time calling her manager yet every attempt was futile.

She had no time to properly dwell on it, not when she was finally in front of Aeri’s office door. She glanced at the assistant’s desk, raising an eyebrow as a way of asking whether Aeri was inside or not. The assistant nodded her head in return.

“Ms. Uchinaga is waiting for you.”

With a twist of a doorknob, Jimin headed inside. To no surprise Aeri seemed to be engrossed in her work. A few stack of files were placed beside her as the typing sounds filled the silence of the four-walled space.

“I came here as per your request Ms. Uchinaga.”

“Please, have a seat.”

Jimin obliged, adjusting her black business suit as she took a seat on the chair across Aeri. She decided to be quiet, letting Aeri know that the latter had the upper hand in leading the conversation. Aeri’s gaze settled on her, as if scrutinising every inch of her. She didn’t bother to hide the plaster on her forehead nor did she try to hide her bandaged hand. Instead, she sat there unmoving, not once uncertainty present in her body language.

“I fired him already.”

Jimin nodded, not surprised by the fact Aeri had known already. Jimin didn’t know how much Aeri knew but from the looks of it, it seemed to be plenty enough. Aeri also didn’t even provide any kind of details on whom she was referring to ‘him’ but Jimin knew who she was talking about.

It’s the new coworker that harassed Jimin after the welcoming dinner a few days ago.

“It’s a bit hard to put him in jail considering I don’t have a lot of evidence against him. Your situation is a bit unfortunate since there was no CCTV around for me to give as evidence.” Aeri’s concerned gaze was crystal clear as a sigh left her lips, the one that sucked the life out of her. “I’m deeply sorry about that, darling.”

Jimin bit her lower lip, feeling a rush of anger coursing through her veins. The sheer fact that she was practically helpless and couldn’t even make him responsible for what he did to her somehow brought a deep sense of frustration within her. 

He did so much yet all he was held accountable was barely nothing?

“Jake is helping me to find ways to make sure he’ll rot in jail. But it’s just…it’ll take a bit of time.” Aeri clapped her hand once before clasping them, eliciting a sharp and crisp sound. “And I apologise for not telling you beforehand but I fired your manager too.”

“Why?”

Aeri’s gaze hardened.

“Where was he when you were at the dinner?”

“He couldn’t attend due to the urgent meeting with Ms. Bae regarding the financial matters. As far as I know everyone at the dinner has been well informed.”

“Ms. Bae was out of town.” Aeri spoke with such a clear and concise tone, not wavering in the slightest. “He was lying about it. And due to his negligence your safety is at risk. His job plays an extremely important role and yet he did it poorly.”

The air surrounding them was thick with tension. Jimin didn’t know what to feel upon knowing that her manager had lied to her face or the fact that his absence was partly the reason why she ended up in such a catastrophic event. Her phone was still on, the screen displayed recent logs calls with her manager’s contact name at the top. 

A shaky exhale left her lips.

She felt like a fool for trusting him. Having her trust broken into pieces just easily made her wonder whether she was that easy to be deceived. Her chest hurts, every breath she took felt sharp. Wrath coursing through her veins, urging her to do something—at least something to alleviate the pain. But she held it in, especially when Aeri’s gaze was still on her. Sitting in this position was proven to be arduous. Jimin was trying her best to not let those ugly emotions engulf her to the point her knuckles were white from the tight grip she had on her phone. 

She needed to be careful of Aeri’s watchful gaze, knowing well all hell would break loose if she ever let herself be vulnerable.

She could never let Aeri witness her vulnerable side. It was more than just a bruised ego and Jimin could never afford to live with that for the rest of her life. A sense of shame would bound to her like heavy chains around her limbs, torturing her the best way they could as well as tainting her with disgrace.

Sure Aeri had been with her the longest than any other person ever did. But Jimin was careful enough to not show her flaws. It’s not that she couldn’t trust Aeri to hold her but it’s more over the fact that she just wasn’t the type of person to show those kinds of things to people she cared about.

“So basically…you're saying that due to his simple lie, I was scarred for life?”

Jimin’s dark gaze met with Aeri’s concerned ones. Aeri was quiet but Jimin knew her well enough to know the unspoken ‘are you okay?’ that she never verbally asked. Jimin couldn’t help but laugh, sounding humourless and grave. If possible, the air around them became more intense to the point Aeri swore she felt goosebumps all over her body.

“It’s funny how my fate lies on the hands of those bloody pricks.”

Jimin’s lips stretched into a smile, the one that didn’t reach her eyes. It was simply empty, void of warmth and more like painful acknowledgement. Her onyx eyes were void of hope. Only despair and disillusionment.

Maybe that was how it was.

Maybe that was how it would always be.

Chapter Text

“Smile please?”

A twitch of lips.

“You’re so bad at this…”

A ding could be heard, echoing throughout the cafe. As if on cue, both employees went back to their designated position as the customer entered the cafe. Ryujin at the cashier while Winter went to the prep station. Ryujin greeted the customer with a smile as she took their order, her professionalism was something to be bragged about considering it had been two years since she worked here and she just knew when to be serious or when to joke around with her coworkers.

Once Ryujin was done, Winter wasted no time to prepare the beverage without any words even if Ryujin had incessantly poked her cheek numerous times. Winter’s movement was deliberate and precise, showcasing such meticulous professionalism despite having distractions in the form of a Satan’s child itself (read: Ryujin).

“I think your facial muscles are starting to weaken due to the fact that you can barely smile.”

“Thank you for your concern.” Winter’s tone was indifferent and cold. And as she shoved the large cup of well-made caramel macchiato towards Ryujin, she made sure to meet Ryujin’s mischievous gaze. “I’ll just have to make sure they stay weakened then.”

A soft laugh left Ryujin’s lips, melded along with the soft music being played from the speaker as Ryujin went to serve the order.

Winter Kim, or at least that was how people knew her.

A stoic, emotionless woman that never really knew how feelings worked, or at least that would be how Ryujin would describe her as. Winter had been living a quiet life for she never really favoured being in the centre of attention, much less having a lot of people to know who she was.

But these past few days had been a headache.

Her encounter with Yu Jimin seemed to shift the trajectory of her life, although not significant but still, Winter could feel it. The sight of red rimmed eyes filled with endless tears, her body shaking like a leaf, a certain gaze that wrenched Winter’s heart even just by witnessing it—a part of her hated herself for not being able to save Jimin from facing that horrible situation all by herself.

Winter couldn’t imagine how lonesome Jimin would have felt, how achingly desperate her prayers were on wishing to be saved that night. Jimin’s condition was the worst considering how she didn’t even realise the shard of glass penetrating her palm, blood dripping from her fist and acknowledging that fact alone only made Winter fumed with wrath.

It was that easy to have your whole life ruined, more so if you were a woman— as disconcerting as it sounds.

“Yo Kim, hurry up.” Ryujin’s voice echoed throughout the empty cafe, followed by the background music and sound effects of the game she was currently playing. “It’s raining outside.”

They had just finished cleaning up and Ryujin was lounging on one of the empty seats while waiting for Winter to change her clothes. The rain fell into a gentle patter, hitting the roof and against the windows just enough to make the world outside a blurry mess of grey and silver. Lights from the passing vehicles and the figures of people passing the cafe became indistinct shapes and rippling shadows of movements.

The door of the staff room creaked open, enough for Ryujin to know that Winter was done changing. Despite this, she kept her attention on the game as she pressed her phone screen vigorously, wanting to finish it as soon as possible.

The heavy thud of boots against the tiles could be heard. Winter’s steps were slow and steady as she walked past Ryujin and went straight to the front door.

“Winter,” Ryujin called, pausing the game midway because the game seemed to take quite a long time to be done. She turned to the front door just in time for lightning to flash. 

For a brief moment, Winter’s silhouette was all she saw. The pitch black trench coat hugging Winter’s petite figure along with a fedora covering the top half of her face weirdly brought a sense of dread to Ryujin. She gulped down the lump in her throat when Winter slowly turned her head to the side, enough to acknowledge her. It took her a brief moment to finally realise Winter was actually waiting for her.

Ryujin wasted no time scurrying to Winter’s side, mindful to put the chair in its designated place.

“You sure you don’t want me to send you home?” Ryujin asked once they were done closing the cafe. “The rain didn’t seem to be easing up soon.”

“I’m fine.” Winter’s lifeless gaze met her. Despite not being bothered by it all this time, it was different this time and stupidly, she didn’t even know why. Winter’s aura was eerily different tonight and it was a lie if she said it didn’t give her creeps.

Ryujin gulped down the lump in her throat, feigning indifference.

“A-Alright, sure.”

Winter stood outside the cafe, simply staring at the rain as Ryujin went inside her car and drove away, her car easily vanishing behind the soft, watery veil of the droplets. She took her umbrella from its holder, unfolding it before carefully making her way into the rainfall.

One would have thought she would be going home.

But she took a different route midway, striding to the left corner and proceeded to go to the narrow alleyway. The rain made it harder considering the ground was damp and a bit slippery, but she managed. Out of the alleyway there was an abandoned public phone booth and she wasted no time to enter, closing the door with a soft click. The drenched umbrella was left open outside. The patter of the rain slightly drowned out.

At the back of her mind she wondered whether this was her absolute decision, knowing she couldn’t turn back to her quiet life once she did. But then the sight of Jimin’s dripping blood and heart-wrenching state came to Winter’s mind, enough to elicit chaos within her head.

Winter let out a frustrated huff.

Taking out a small phone from her pocket, she dialled a number. It was not long before the call was answered.

“This is Uchinaga Aeri, may I know who’s on the line?”

“I called you using Yu Jimin’s phone the other day.”

A brief tense silence.

“What do you want?”

“How has Kang Minho been doing?”

Aeri’s voice reduced to a harsh whisper. “How did you find out his name?”

Winter’s gaze fell to the droplets that splashed onto the ground. Her gaze was emotionless as ever yet there was a slight change in her voice, sounding deeper and grim.

“Aeri-ssi.” A warning tone. “Tell me.”

A soft sigh could be heard over the call. For a moment only drowned out raindrops could be heard and Winter simply kept quiet, the tip of her boots traced the muddy ground beneath.

“He was fired but that’s all. There was no concrete evidence to bring him to the police and there’s not much that I can do.”

A tilt of the head. Seems like she had to settle this another way then. 

An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth.

And blood for blood.

The corner of her lips twitched and for a split second, it did seem like a smile before it vanished away. Winter ended the call instantly, throwing the phone to the nearest bin as she walked away from the booth, a destination was set in mind. The umbrella was left unfetched, tumbling away helplessly by the wind’s direction.

Winter brought the wrath close to her, letting the flames blazing brightly, dancing closer to the stars in each step she took.

Kang Minho.

A newly hired coworker in the management department at Ellis Entertainment except that it took him less than three days to be fired. Fair enough, considering he had been quite problematic in the previous companies he worked so far. He was in his early 30s, living alone in a small apartment with his dog. The apartment building was around 25 minutes from Winter’s current location yet she didn’t even bother to take any taxi, just simply wanting to buy some time.

His peace will be disrupted soon enough and she was kind enough to offer him some time.

314

Her drenched boots left a dirty trace along the empty hallway. Her gait was slow and relaxed as her footsteps echoed throughout the place— a stark contrast to the rage coursing through her veins. Left right left right. The sound halted as the boots stopped right in front of a wooden door.

Hazel eyes fluttered close, remembering the exact bruises and wounds on Jimin’s skin. Her jaw unknowingly clenched.

Forehead, shoulder, rib, palm…

She opened her eyes, noting the muffled animated tv show being played along with a loud male voice talking.

“I got fired because of that whore, can you believe it—”

Winter rolled her eyes. He was surely loud.

Ding-dong!

There was a string of curses before the front door was opened. Kang Minho was taller than her and had quite a nice build so it wasn’t a surprise when his figure towered her petite one. For someone as buff as him, it would take a bit of time to take him down but she knew he lacked fighting techniques. Probably less than ten minutes would be sufficed for her. After all, he’s all bark no bite. She had him under her radar long enough for her to at least be aware of the details.

She caught a whiff of alcohol. 

Hm. 

He just made her work easier.

Forehead, shoulder, rib, palm…

His annoyed gaze settled on Winter and his tone was far from polite.

“What do you want?”

Winter glanced down just a brief moment to notice the phone in his grip. She tilted her head, a slow smile making its way across her face— cunning and deceitful. The rainwater had already created a small pool around her boots yet she paid no mind to it.

Her gaze turned mirthful yet he couldn’t see it for her eyes were veiled by the shadows from her fedora. All he could witness was the way droplets of rain gently cascaded down her jaw and neck. And more than anything, he was growing impatient, ever so oblivious of his impending doom.

Forehead, shoulder, rib, palm…face.

“You’re alone aren’t you…” There was a dangerous lilt in her tone as she playfully dragged her words. “Kang Minho?”

***

“Who the hell are you…” 

Aeri’s question was drowned out by a roll of thunder. She swiftly swivelled in the chair whilst one hand reached for the remote placed on the desk. With a press of a button, the roller blinds were raised. Her office room was located on the higher floor which allowed her to see most of the things in miniscule—although, they’re not really tiny but…yeah.

From here she could see almost everything. The colourful umbrellas on the street, the vehicles and even the buildings ahead her. She allowed herself to relax, heaving a deep sigh as she stared at the view unfolding before her.

Aeri knew better than to blindly trust this mysterious person that saved Jimin a few nights ago. Sure Jimin seemed to be in one piece and seeing that alone managed to prove more on how this person was actually meant to help instead of jeopardising her.

But it’s way too suspicious, as if that person didn’t want to be found.

And Aeri was not dumb either. She knew the number used to call her was probably not that person’s number. It could possibly be a burner phone or a burner SIM card considering how the calls went unreached when Aeri tried to contact the number again.

She’ll need to be careful, knowing how both Jimin and her were under the radar of this person. Anything could happen and if this person was actually planning to bring them down, Aeri needed to be prepared for the worst.

A flash of lightning and Aeri’s thoughts dissipated the moment she heard a few knocks. The door clicked open and she turned around just in time to see a dark brown haired woman stepping into her office. The woman’s condition was bad. Her hair was damp from the rain. Her shirt clung onto the skin and her outerwear slipped off one shoulder. The rim of her eyes were red and Aeri was certain it was not caused by the rain.

For a moment the woman stood there, appearing so dejected and hopeless.

“Yizhuo?” Aeri stood up straight. Concern was clear in her gaze. “You’re okay, dear?”

Yizhuo’s lips trembled as she slowly walked past Aeri’s work desk. Judging by the way she walked, it was only a matter of time before she dropped to her knees, as every step seemed to drain the few bits of energy she had left.

It was when she was in front of Aeri that Aeri finally saw it as clear as day.

Her gaze was full of pain, reflecting the raging of emotions within. Aeri’s heart ached at the sight. Aeri noticed her fingers were pale and they involuntarily twitched (by the cold or anxiety, Aeri could never know) as she gestured. Aeri’s gaze was glued on her hands, feeling her heart drop down to her stomach the moment she registered what Yizhuo meant to say.

“I just want to kill myself.”

***

Winter threw her fedora to the dustbin, ambling towards the nearest bench before taking a seat. It was raining and the whole thing was drenched but she paid no mind to it as she leaned against the backrest, letting her eyes flutter close.

She simply basked in the coldness of the world had to offer, letting her mind drift away by the sound of raindrops.

Her left arm was throbbing, profoundly so each time the raindrops fell onto the open wound. She got it from none other than Kang Minho who threw a knife at her, leaving a gash across her arm. But right now, she didn’t feel like moving despite how her whole body was aching.

She didn’t know how long she stayed there but when her eyes fluttered open, she noticed how some of the pooling water on the bench was already mixed with her trickling blood from the open wound. Her wrath seemingly washed away by the raindrops, leaving her with numbness. She was about to get up when her gaze caught something—or rather, someone.

It’s only been a few days since their last encounter.

Stopping a few feets away from the bench, there stood Yu Jimin being drenched from her head to the toe with a gaze as lifeless as the grave. Their eyes met yet no one moved from their position nor dared to say anything. Winter blinked the raindrops blurring her vision, noting how Jimin’s eyes were red to which Winter supposed the liquid cascading down her face was not merely the rain. Maybe it was her tears too.

There was a tug in her heartstrings.

Winter got up, ignoring the incessant pain on her left arm as she lessened the distance between them. Sure Jimin was a few inches taller than her but at this moment, her figure appeared fragile beneath the merciless rain to the point Winter wondered if she would crumble once Winter’s calloused hand touched her.

So Winter didn’t.

Why is she here again?

For a moment she watched, trying to figure out what Jimin could possibly need at this moment. The fact that Jimin went all the way here somehow made her curious, knowing well their encounter was nothing sort of pleasant. Winter assumed no one would even want to meet a stranger that witnessed them in such a horrible situation, well at least not involuntarily of course.

But somehow, Jimin was here.

“Do you want me to hold you?” It was a bold question coming from Winter who lacked physical affection but she just assumed it was probably the best one to ask considering Jimin was about to fall apart anytime sooner.

Her question however, seemed to hit the spot when Jimin’s face contorted in anguish, her sobs sounded convulsively painful as she staggered into Winter’s smaller frame. Jimin’s arms were wrapped around her waist, enough to bring them closer as Jimin placed her head against her shoulder. Winter’s arms hung to the sides awkwardly to which she decided to bring her right hand up to pat Jimin’s back. Jimin trembled against her.

Be gentle with her, Winter. Be gentle.

Winter didn’t know what to feel. Jimin held her like she was terrified of letting go. As if the world would shatter once they broke apart. Being held like this was truly not in this year’s planner—and to think about it again, Jimin’s presence in her life was never written in her planner in the first place.

The feelings of being needed for once, it was something she never expected to experience, not when she had buried them all in the past.

No one needed her.

Everyone abandoned her.

Yet this woman; a freaking Yu Jimin proved otherwise.

Chapter Text

The rain had subsided into a gentle drizzle, the one that left an earthy scent lingering to one’s senses. Jimin was in the living room, clad in Winter’s warm grey hoodie and white sweatpants. Her eyes were closed, leaning against the seat of the sofa when Winter got out of her bedroom after changing, already clad in a beige turtleneck and joggers as she went to the kitchen to grab the first aid.

She had pulled her sleeve up after showering so it could be easier to treat it, knowing well it would be more painful if the fabric ever grazed the open wound. She grabbed the skin glue from the box and applied a thin layer over the wound. She bit her lip upon feeling the stinging sensation. With a careful touch, she pressed the edges of the wound together, her gaze casted towards Jimin as she waited for the glue to set.

Jimin’s chest rose and dipped as she breathed. If anything, this version of Jimin seemed relaxed and serene as if there was nothing, even a mere wind would ever dare to disturb her peace. Winter was glad, knowing how emotionally broken Jimin was prior, so her being able to catch a break would surely mean a lot.

A sigh left Winter’s lips as she skillfully bandaged her arm, the dressing was settled in less than three minutes despite her doing it with one hand. Once she was done, she put the first aid to its respective place before making her way towards Jimin.

“Jimin-ssi.”

The said woman didn’t respond. Winter tilted her head, curious. Was she sleeping? Winter wanted to at least carry Jimin to her bedroom since it was comfier but knowing the possibility of waking her up and the fact that her left arm was practically useless, she buried her intention.

She stood in front of Jimin for a moment, simply admiring. She remembered Jimin’s face that contorted with pure anguish, her tear-filled eyes, and the slightly bluish lips from God knew how long she had been soaked beneath the rain. All those had vanished, to which Winter was thankful for. Her lips now had regained their slightly pinkish colour, her skin complexion was no longer as pale and— oh, she was crying in her sleep.

Winter reached out her hand, gently wiping away a single tear escaping from the corner of Jimin’s eye. Jimin’s skin was warm against the cold pad of her thumb. Winter held her breath.

“What are you dreaming about?” Winter gently muttered, her voice unknowingly had a slight tinge of concern. “Someone as pretty as you shouldn’t be crying in your sleep.”

Onyx eyes delicately fluttered open, meeting with hazel ones. Winter’s hand stilled at the side of Jimin’s face, close enough to emanate warm but not enough to touch her skin. Jimin’s onyx eyes held a certain depth that Winter could not really figure out and the glimmer in them upon being shone by the fluorescent lights enough to halt whatever thoughts in Winter’s mind from running wild.

For once, she was speechless.

Winter stood dumbly in front of Jimin, being flustered like a high school kid after meeting her crush. She felt how warmth travelled from her nape to her whole face, and without needing to look at the mirror, she knew she was blushing.

She retracted her hand, making sure it didn’t appear awkward.

Jimin blinked, effectively causing the rest of her pooled tears to cascade down her face. Winter held back from wiping them off, which turned to be a surprisingly hard temptation. She had always prided herself for being able to control herself. But this sight— she hated how easily her resolutions crumble just by seeing Jimin cry.

“Shoot. I was crying, didn’t I?” Jimin harshly wiped the tears by the sleeve of her hoodie. Her gaze then fell to Winter’s left arm, noting the bandage. “What’s wrong with your arm? Are you okay?”

“Just a small wound.”

“That…doesn’t look like a small wound to me.”

Winter went silent before replying with a gentle, “A moderate wound.”

Despite the poker face she wore, Winter internally chastised herself for not being able to provide a proper excuse. It was hard. Her head became mush just by standing in front of Jimin, sharing the same space and it also didn’t help that Jimin was a pretty crier (an extremely breathtaking one even). It only glitched her brain further into oblivion.

“What happened?”

Upon the question, Winter’s mind traversed back to Kang Minho’s offensive remarks about Jimin, only to feel rage consuming her again. She heaved a small sigh, trying to forget his annoying face.

“Someone…plunged a knife…accidentally.” Winter’s lips stretched, attempting to smile only for it to end up as a grimace. “It hit my arm because I wasn’t being careful enough.”

There. Not a complete truth but not straight up a lie either.

“Are you expecting me to buy that excuse?”

Winter’s expression dropped, her gaze went emotionless again. Jimin narrowed her eyes in return.

Dang she got me.

“No.” She shrugged. She really should find something to divert the topic. “You should go to sleep, princess.”

As if on cue, Winter witnessed the way Jimin’s whole face became red. At the sight, Winter’s heart unknowingly swelled with warmth. She blinked, not really knowing what to react.

“Please take the bed.” Winter offered, deciding to sit on the other side of the sofa instead.

“But what about you?”

“I don’t sleep.”

A beat of silence.

“Why?”

“I can’t.”

“Why?”

“Amne—” Winter caught herself, remembering they had this exact conversation before. “Insomnia.”

Jimin’s lips pulled into a smile. For once there was a gentle glint in her eyes, so different from her saddened state before. The harsh fluorescent lights did nothing to dim out her features, if anything, it was as if she was glowing and even if Winter’s heart stuttered against her chest, even if she felt oddly warm inside, she feigned indifference. 

Winter’s gaze inadvertently fell on Jimin’s lips.

She discreetly gulped down the lump in her throat, feeling like a sinner for even having a split thought about how pretty Jimin was.

Be normal, Winter. People smile. There’s nothing wrong with that. Everyone is pretty when they smile.

“Winter-ssi.” Jimin called, enough to have Winter’s hazel eyes settled on her once again. “I feel bad taking the bed. You’ve done a lot already.”

A moment of silence flew by. Winter studied Jimin’s expression, noting the guilt painting her features. It was not like she minded it, heck, she would do it again in a heartbeat. But Winter knew this topic would never end if she indulged in it any longer and Jimin would not be getting any sleep she deserved.

“Would you feel less bad if I’m in the same bed then?”

Onyx eyes widened, surprise painting her features in an almost comical way that had the corner of Winter’s lips tugged into a subtle smirk.

Jimin thought Winter was joking.

Winter wasn’t.

And somehow they ended up on the same bed, with Jimin lying on her back, both hands placed on top of her stomach akin to a century-old vampire resting in their coffin whilst Winter was sitting with her head leaning against the backrest, one hand idly scrolling through her phone. Full rimmed rectangle glasses perched on her nose bridge as her bandaged arm limped by her side. The dim yellowish light from the bedside lamp provided a sufficient light source for them.

Winter wanted to laugh.

Jimin was so stiff, not even moving in the slightest. It was as though she was being surrounded by sleeping hyenas and the only resort was to not move, afraid if she gained any attention.

“You aren’t sleeping.” Winter spoke after a while, noticing how Jimin was still wide awake staring at the ceiling above.

Jimin’s voice was half-air and half-sound, sounding gentle and small as if she didn’t want to disturb the tranquillity. But then again, maybe she was tired. “Maybe because you’re not sleeping.”

Winter removed her glasses, placing them on the bedside table. Her tone lacked any emotions, like how it used to be.

“I'm an insomniac.”

“I know,” there was a slight tinge of desperation. “I’m sorry but it’s just my brain refuses to sleep knowing that you’re not going to sleep.”

Winter didn’t reply. After a moment of thinking things through, she decided to turn off her phone and placed them on the bedside table. She reached to turn off the bedside lamp, leaving the room in darkness if it’s not for the faint light of the street lamps outside.

A shift and shuffle of the sheets could be heard. Once settled, Winter closed her eyes, her small voice drifted away like a gentle breeze. Not once did it contain any hint of malice, accusal nor hatred.

“Goodnight, Jimin-ssi.”

“Can I…can I hold your hand?”

Winter didn’t reply but simply tapped her hand on the sheets to search for Jimin’s hand. Soon enough, she felt Jimin’s warm palm and she intertwined their fingers, her thumb gently caressing the skin. Upon their close proximity, Winter caught a whiff of faint black opium, probably Jimin’s still lingering perfume that somehow melded with Winter’s own vanilla scent. It wasn’t a pleasant combination, in fact, it was fresh and new and Winter found herself indulging in it.

There was a slight pause before Jimin replied with a timid, “Thank you.”

Probably it was due to the darkness, which gave quite a plenty of space for irrational thoughts and insecurities to roam freely. Or maybe it was the shared space of intimacy they had. But after a while, Winter heard soft restraint sobs from her side and the grip of the hand holding her was tad tighter.

“You’re crying.” Winter’s voice cut through the silence. And somehow, that statement seemingly enough for the dam to break when she heard a whimper followed by sobs that became convulsively painful even to her ears.

“I’m sorry.” A desperate whisper. “I tried to be quiet— it’s just— can’t— I can’t stop the tears—”

Rather than seeing her break apart, it was more like Winter felt her breaking apart into irreparable damage— a final phase of desolation. There was something off in the way Jimin breathed. It was as if she was drowning amidst the choked sobs and tears. And Winter just knew it wasn’t normal. 

Jimin was hyperventilating.

Winter wasted no time to change their position, using her uninjured hand to prop her weight. Her other hand brought Jimin’s hand up to her nape, letting Jimin feel her skin while she placed Jimin’s other hand on her own beating chest. She tried to ignore the stinging pain upon the movement, knowing there was something far more important to be focused on.

“You can feel me right?” Winter pressed Jimin’s hand against her chest, making sure Jimin would focus on her heartbeat. Hazel eyes witnessed the tears glinting beneath the dull moonlight. “We’re going to breathe slowly. Follow me okay? Inhale…and exhale.”

It took Jimin a while but she could finally calm down. Winter didn’t know how their position had changed with Jimin somehow ending up on top of her. She didn’t really care to take note of it, not when Jimin was crying quietly against her with one hand gripping tightly onto the fabric of her turtleneck. Jimin’s body trembled slightly and Winter knew it was not because of the cold, but still, she pulled the duvet close to them before gently patting her back.

Jimin was heavy, Winter wouldn’t lie. She was literally squished against Jimin, further into the mattress and she was just grateful her injured arm was not squished along. It would have been excruciating if it did. Her turtleneck was damp from the tears and even if it felt slightly uncomfortable, she didn’t utter a single word.

Winter didn’t know how much time had passed. The only thing she registered was the way Jimin’s breath slowly evened out and no more sobs filling in the silence, which Winter supposed she had probably fast asleep. Gently, she held Jimin’s hand and brought it up, noting that the cut from the other night was slowly healing. It would probably take another 3 or 4 days for it to fully heal.

She put Jimin's hand down, mindful to be careful as to not wake the sleeping woman. She shifted lightly for a comfortable position before closing her eyes, trying to sleep. She knew it was impossible since she’d been awake for days now but since she’d been trapped in this position, it wouldn’t hurt to try.

“Rest well, Jimin-ssi.”

Her whisper easily dissipated through the still air, went unheard to the sleeping woman on top of her. But it’s not like she minded. As long as Jimin could have some rest, it would be enough.

Frankly, Winter didn’t expect to be able to sleep yet surprisingly, she found herself drifting away to dreamland easier than she thought it would be—as odd as it sounded. The last thing she registered before darkness consumed her vision was the warmth on top of her and the steady breath gently caressing the side of her nape.

(That night was her most restful sleep Winter ever had but there was no way she was going to admit that.)

***

Winter was preparing breakfast for Jimin when she heard the bedroom door click closed followed by urgent footsteps leading to the front door. There was a shuffle and a twist of a front door but Winter wouldn’t let Jimin get away so easily.

“Yu Jimin-ssi.”

Her voice alone seemed to make the whole world still, considering how she didn’t even hear any kind of noise except for the faint chirping of the birds outside. Jimin was hesitant. That much Winter knew. And at some point Winter understood. All the hesitancy and caution were necessary especially when a stranger had witnessed her vulnerability, not once but twice. It would have been humiliating and shameful considering those were what she wanted to hide in the first place.

Winter adjusted her glasses to keep them from slipping down her nose.

“I prepared breakfast for you.” Her words cut through the silence. Though she couldn’t see Jimin’s figure, she knew Jimin was considering her offer, knowing well it was rude to run away just like that from someone that had offered nothing but kindness during the times she came here.

And Jimin was nowhere near impudent.

Winter was placing a plate of kimchi fried rice and a glass of water on the small dining table when she heard careful footsteps coming closer. Jimin came to her line of sight soon after, looking so dishevelled as if she jolted out of the bed and went straight to the front door. 

The fabric slightly rumpled which Winter assumed was due to the sleep, the left sleeve had ridden up to her elbow and one of the drawstring somehow ended up on her shoulder while the other dangled loosely from the hood. Jimin’s hair was messy, some strands sticking up in every direction.

Jimin carefully took a seat and Winter slid the plate and the glass closer to her before taking a seat across her, her gaze settled on Jimin. The raven haired woman gently took a spoonful but as she did so, her hair almost touched the plate so Winter leaned forward, brushing Jimin’s hair to the back. The table itself was small so there was no problem in reaching Jimin.

Winter also went ahead to gently brush the messy strands, making sure Jimin appeared a bit presentable. She was midway doing it when she noticed Jimin had frozen like a statue. Winter stopped, her hand stilled mid-air as hazel eyes met onyx ones.

Winter’s heart skipped a beat.

“You’re trying to run away like you just regretted having a one night stand with me.” Those words left her lips effortlessly, a contrast to how flustered she was on having those eyes staring at her so deeply. Her lips formed into a small smile upon seeing warmth spreaded on Jimin’s face down to her whole nape. “I won’t bite, I’m sure you know that.”

Onyx eyes averted away.

Winter settled back into her seat, one hand on the table, fingers lightly drumming against the surface. For a moment there was nothing but silence, accompanied by the light clanking of the spoon and the plate as Jimin ate.

“I’m just…embarrassed.”

Winter raised an eyebrow, her expression remained unreadable.

“Of?”

“The whole thing.” Jimin gently placed the spoon on the empty plate, one hand reaching for the mug. Her gaze was not once directed towards Winter. “You’ve seen me at my worst. And weirdly enough, I don’t know why I keep coming back to you.”

Winter leaned forward, propping her chin on her palm. The air was heavy with unspoken emotions, lingering in the still air, gently wrapping them in its suffocating embrace.

“You can always come to me whenever you need someone. I’ll be there for you.”

Onyx eyes finally meeting hers. Jimin’s laded gaze was full of emotions as if she was overwhelmed by Winter’s statement.

“Why are you treating me like this?” Jimin’s voice broke at the end of the sentence, and it gripped Winter’s heart with a sense of poignancy.

“Why can’t I?” Winter’s gaze was earnest and genuine. “The world is already filled with pain and hatred. You’re already tired and I’m just offering you a chance to rest.”

Jimin shook her head, looking down. Her shoulders were tense and Winter noticed how hard she held herself back from breaking down right there and then, as if Winter's morning didn’t deserve to be ruined by her tears.

“You’re too kind for someone like me.”

Winter stilled. Those words hit deeper than she thought it would, affected her more than she expected. Her gaze was distant, empty even, as flashes of past flickered through her mind, leaving her with dread and numbness.

“I’m not kind Jimin-ssi.” Her voice came out as a whisper, filled with regret and misery. “I’m not kind.”

Chapter Text

Tedious.

There were not many customers in the cafe. Only a few students catching up with the deadline and regulars. Ryujin, who had taken charge of the music, already vanished behind the door of the back room before a catchy pop melody filled the cafe ambience, enough to brighten the atmosphere of the lonely and gloomy night.

Winter, who had just finished wiping the table, walked to the prep station to clean the slight mess of the milk and coffee brew. Once done, her gaze directed to the espresso machine and grinders as her mind traversed far away from reality.

Karina Yu.

It would be a lie if Winter said that she didn’t know who Karina Yu was. Well, initially she didn’t since she never cared about celebrities in the first place. But after her encounter with Yu Jimin, it was natural for her to be curious thus leading Winter to (legally) find out further about her information.

And she was indeed caught off guard over the fact that Yu Jimin and Karina were the same person. Yu Jimin was Karina and Karina was Jimin—that statement alone itched her brain weirdly because she couldn’t fathom how they could be the same person.

Karina seemed to be fierce and intimidating. A force to be reckoned with. Her mere presence could silence the room and compel even the most defiant to yield. One thing for sure, if this Karina ever was the one to encounter Winter, they wouldn't last a minute without them arguing because Winter had always had a weird knack of fighting with rich, daunting women. Don’t ask how. It sort of just happened.

Jimin, on the other hand, was like a dainty flower, ever so gentle. Her features were softer due to the lack of heavy makeup adorning her face and there was this innocence emanating off her that made it impossible for Winter to hate her. Jimin was very delicate and Winter often found herself backing away, worried if her touches ever break her into pieces because that was all Winter was; intense, cold and calloused. 

Jimin’s heartbroken gaze and agonised sobs had become an incessant reminder for her to draw a definite line between them, knowing if Winter ever got close to her, Jimin would end up hurting. Sure Winter seemed to be confident and emotionless at times, but deep down, she feared that she ended up to be the one that hurt Jimin.

Because that was all she ever was capable of; hurting people.

“Ryujin.”

They both were done for the day and Winter was leaning against the counter, waiting for Ryujin to finish changing. There was a muffled hum from the staff room, indicating that Ryujin heard her. Winter went quiet, opting to wait for Ryujin to come out as she mindlessly tracing the tile lines with her boots. It did not take long for Ryujin to barge out, skipping happily towards Winter as if she had just got confessed by her crush instead of having quite a tiring day at work.

“What’s wrong bro~ ” Ryujin sang-song as she followed Winter out of the cafe, her tone was light and carefree.

“Do you know Karina?”

“She’s always been famous but nowadays it just kinda skyrocketed after the latest drama—I don’t quite remember its name though…” Ryujin pursed her lips in ponder. She glanced at Winter who was locking up the place, curiosity filled her gaze. “This is so unlike you. You never ask me these kinds of things.”

Winter didn’t reply, opting to stay quiet as she locked the padlock on the external gate. It was easier considering her back was facing Ryujin and she didn’t have to face Ryujin’s annoyingly teasing expression.

“Did you fall head over heels with her already, bro?”

That question, however, managed to catch her off guard. The keys slipped off her grasp, hitting the ground with a clatter of clinking sound. She was fast to grab them and turned around, not wanting Ryujin to notice anything. Her voice was as cold as it could ever be and her gaze remained stoic.

“What makes you think that?”

“She’s pretty, isn’t she?” Ryujin said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world (it was). “If you don’t think she’s pretty then you must have problems with your eyes. You should get them checked.”

Fair enough.

A nod.

“Well, she’s gorgeous.”

Winter immediately threw the keys to Ryujin who struggled catching them since she couldn’t really multitask. By that means, the keys clashed against her forehead as she literally took at least one minute to properly register Winter’s words. By the time she did, Winter was already feets away from her.

“ Y-Yah Winter, how come you never compliment me but you chose to compliment an actress that doesn’t even know your existence? I’m getting jealous here, bro!”

***

Something was off.

Winter perked up, noticing the light footsteps behind her. She turned around once, only to be met with nothing. The street was empty and the flickering street lamps were the only source of light for Winter to head home. Hazel eyes scanned throughout the street, narrowing her eyes at the looming shadows just to ensure that it wasn’t a silhouette of a person.

At first she was sceptical but still, her footsteps remained careful and calculated as she went through the alleyway.

Her instinct was proven true when she heard sudden rapid movement followed by a swish of air on her back. Turning to the other side, she was fast to grab the hand that was holding a knife and elbowed them right on the face. It was a man, she noticed. Tall and not really muscular, giving more than enough benefits to her. Using his imbalance as her advantage, she twisted his wrist and turned him around. Alas he was fast to recover when his other hand swung towards her, meeting her jaw with a sharp blow.

She staggered back. Heaving a frustrated sigh, her deadly eyes set on him. He was clad in all black, upper face covered with a cap and its shadows managed to obscure his face to the point of unidentifiable. But that smirk on his face only added the fuel to the fire of wrath raging within her.

“You ruined my face.”

Swiftly she ran towards him and jumped, making sure to target his face as she swung her leg, putting as much force as possible. She could feel the crack of his cheekbone against her boot before he was thrown over to the side as impact. She reached over to him, wanting to finish him off only for him to swing the knife towards her. It almost sliced the skin of her cheek but she managed to dodge. However, his second strike was unexpected as he thrust the sharp blade into her left shoulder.

She gasped upon feeling the tear in her skin and muscles as it penetrated deep inside. Their eyes met and annoyingly, he pushed the knife deeper. A painful moan left her lips. A kick landed on her stomach, enough to create distance between them.

Rage burned her greater into the flames, coursing through her veins. Her gaze turned darker as a dangerous glint sparked within. The air around them crackled with such a palpable intensity, suffocating even. At first he was smiling but it faltered the moment he noticed her changed demeanour. He knew his small achievement meant nothing, not when she was still breathing, intact right in front of him.

It was better to die rather than mess with the devil's disguise because you’ll only be saved by their mercy. 

And they hardly have any mercy.

He sealed his fate the moment he penetrated the knife into her. The moment he witnessed a psychotic smile painted her lips, he knew he was done for. Her usual soft voice was rough, laced with cruelty and malice. Her calculative and cold demeanour was gone.

She was slowly going rabid.

“You should have aimed at my heart, you fool .”

It was probably adrenaline catching up to her but she managed to take him down faster than the first time, her punches were endless as she aimed at his face. At first he raised his arms in a desperate attempt to block her advances but the blows were only getting stronger each time to the point he ended up giving up for once and for all.

Winter didn’t seem to plan on stopping at all. 

His cap was abandoned somewhere she didn’t bother to know, leaving his bloodied face on sight beneath the dim streetlamp and it was quite satisfying considering he had stabbed her. She only stopped when she noticed a pool of blood on the ground near where his head was. When she let him go, his head weakly dropped to the ground with an audible thud. His breathing was weak and strained and his face no longer recognizable.

He was still awake.

And that was good enough.

Leaning close to his ear, her whisper sounded harsh and cruel, “If you dare to tell a soul, I’ll make sure to kill you in your sleep.”

She left him out in the cold.

Coming home, she noticed how her front door was unlocked. Exhaustion dragged her down and she wanted nothing more than to hibernate all the pain away but fate seemed to have another plan by giving her another visitor. 

Was this person an accomplice of the man from before?

She bit her lip as she carefully made her way inside, her boots made an audible sound upon making contact with the tiles beneath. The whole place was dark, so void of light. She stood there for a moment, ears straining for any sound or movement. 

A beat passed. 

Nothing.

With a huff, she struggled to take them off considering she only had one functioning hand. The other hand was left limp, knowing if she ever moved a muscle it would only make the pain on her shoulder far more palpable. Her sock clad feet trudged deeper into the depth of the living room before she stopped.

A soft hum left her lips.

“Were you waiting for me?”

She stepped back carefully until she reached the switch. A flick of a wrist and the lights came spilling in the place. 

Winter’s instinct was right. There was someone.

Burgundy nails drummed against the armrest of the couch, black locks cascaded down in waves and ruby lips pulled into a smile. This woman was sitting on the sofa, one leg crossing over the other as her gaze set on Winter, obviously judging. Her ivory suit hugged her figure nicely, void of crease and tailored to perfection. Eloquence filling in the littlest movement she did, enough for Winter to know this woman before her was not a mere figure.

“Hey there, darling ,” There was a certain lilt in her tone that made the endearment coated with venomous sweetness, as if each word dripped with hidden malice. “It’s a pleasure to finally see you. You’re quite good-looking I must say.”

The pain. It’s throbbing. A slow exhale left Winter’s lips as she tried to maintain her composure.

“Were you with the man that tried to stab me in the alleyway just now?”

There was a palpable silence before the woman replied with, “No, but from the looks of it, I suppose you’re quite famous.”

Winter didn’t offer any explanation, her mouth shut. The woman let out a soft laugh.

“Winter Kim, right?” The woman’s smile grew as her gaze shifted. “Or should I say, former agent Winter Kim?”

Winter went cold, paralysed by that statement alone. Her one hand discreetly went into her jacket pocket, trying to make her movement as natural as possible. She kept a relaxed gait as she stepped closer to the woman, her gaze as emotionless as ever.

“Who are you?”

“Uchinaga Aeri, I suppose you’re familiar with that name, yes?” The said woman raised her hand enough for her to place her chin on the palm, her gaze was curious. “I tried to track you but it seemed like you left a cold trail every single time. I knew the culprit behind Kang Minho’s case and the one at the awards ceremony was done by the same person. It’s a wonder how much of a chaos you did but never once left a single evidence. May I ask why you prefer to be messy and beat their face up?”

Winter’s hand gripped onto the cold handle, engulfing her fingers for a secure grip. Her gaze remained unmoving.

“It's called mercy.”

Her reply was enough to elicit wonder in Aeri’s gaze.

“Care to explain, darling?”

“I want them to suffer for what they have done. Using my hands is the most lenient thing I could consider doing.”

“Why not a knife?” Aeri’s gaze subconsciously fell onto the knife stuck to Winter’s shoulder. “Or a gun?”

“That’s a foul move, Aeri-ssi. If anything, I prefer to fight fair and square. Clearly, it’s their fault for not being strong enough to defeat me.” She swiftly took out her gun and aimed straight to Aeri. “You, on the other hand, are not on my plan.”

Aeri went quiet. For a moment, the silence enveloping them was tense, enough to suffocate them to die. An audible click was heard when Winter pulled the hammer to the cocked position. She positioned her hand, aiming for Aeri’s left eye.

Her shoulder was throbbing and her left arm was slowly getting numb, which means that she needed to be fast. She hated that her plan to treat the wound as soon as possible was interrupted.

“Tell me your purpose.”

“You’re getting impatient, darling.”

“One would surely be, considering this damned knife is still on me.”

“Work with me.” Aeri’s lips stretched into a smile, less menacing this time. “Or you’ll be stuck with that knife for a long time because I don’t plan on moving until you say yes.”

“Aeri-ssi.” Winter’s voice went deeper, laced with harshness. “I could literally shoot you and call it a day.”

“Do it then.”

This annoying prick…

“You hesitated.” Aeri chuckled. “The gun was blank, isn’t it darling?”

Winter gritted her teeth, not liking in the slightest how Aeri’s tone was nothing but smug. Aeri knew Winter was running out of time. Having a knife too long in her shoulder can only increase the risk of infection. Not to mention how the nerves and tissues can be severely damaged. And Winter would very much loathe herself if she had an immobilised limb for the rest of her life.

“How about you follow me to the hospital first and we’ll discuss my proposal once that knife is no longer stuck to your body. How’s that sound?”

Sacrificing her ego and pride, Winter had no choice but to relent.

But not before she aimed the gun to the side, pressing the trigger. Aeri visibly flinched as the empty vase broke into pieces, falling down with loud clanking noises. Winter’s lips twitched into a small smile.

The gun she had was considered as quietest gun out of all due to the integrated suppressor that reduced the noise. Winter never liked loud noises in the first place. Despite that, Winter supposed the firing sound itself would travel as far as at least two or three houses and it would be a concern if it was not for the fact that she was living in the middle of abandoned buildings, meaning no one barely heard it.

This place was the perfect place to die.

“Aeri-ssi.” 

Hazel eyes stared at deep brown eyes.

“It’s live.”

***

It was a horrendously dumb excuse.

Aeri’s demeanour surprisingly changed the moment they reached hospital, being a panicked mess as she called for a doctor. The way she lied to the doctors and nurses was way too convincing that Winter was tad fascinated by how she could make up that kind of lie in the first place. And it was even funnier to know that they believed it without an ounce of doubt painted on their face.

“You should use a logical lie next time, Aeri-ssi.” Winter had spoken once the doctor and nurses assigned for her had left the ward. “Accidentally stabbing me while you’re cooking for dinner is pretty much a ridiculous reason. It’s almost 2 in the morning, no one cooks dinner during this time.”

Aeri was seated on the chair next to the bed, gently wiping away her tears with a piece of handkerchief. Her movement was as elegant as it could be, a contrast to how she was a few minutes prior.

“Consider yourself lucky, Kim Winter. I haven’t shed tears since I was in elementary school and yet I wasted it here just to make sure they don’t catch on to the fact that stupid knife is for killing and not for cooking.”

A sigh left Winter’s lips. A lot of questions hang in the air, waiting for her to verbalise it out but the exhaustion was palpable now that her body was relaxed against the soft mattress. The pain was no longer felt, considering that she was given anaesthetic beforehand and she was left fighting with the sleepiness.

“How much do you know about me?”

Aeri perked in her seat, her smile was cunning.

“Curious, aren’t we?”

“ Aeri-ssi .”

“Geez, you can’t even take a joke.” Aeri narrowed her eyes in dissatisfaction. “Winter Kim, a former undercover agent with quite astounding skills yet somehow was stripped of her position due to a blunder. What kind of blunder? Dunno . Previous schools you attend, your former name, family background; confidential. That’s all I know because I’m too lazy to do further research on you. Mind you, I’m busy as I already am but then these kinds of things keep happening. I’m not surprised if I’ll end up in a mental hospital one day, I swear.”

It felt odd to know the years of her life being summarised as compact and easy as Aeri did. It sounded simple, as if she didn’t put her blood, sweat and tears on every given task just to reach the top. Winter didn’t know whether she preferred it this way or not.

“Why did you choose me?”

“You’re competent enough. I really need to find a suitable manager and bodyguard for Karina and you kind of tick all the boxes. Perfect adaptability, good technical skills, high integrity and most importantly, you are capable of protecting Karina.”

Karina?

Of course it’s about Karina, Winter should have known.

“What do I gain from all of this?”

“Money, that’s the first thing. Our company is quite loaded and I can assure you the salary would meet your expectations, more so now that you’ll be in charge of protecting Karina, one job that her previous managers kept failing to do. Plus, I know you’re trying to make ends meet, the whole lengthy list of jobs that you have done as part time proves a lot that you’re struggling financially—”

“Why did you even look at those—”

“Next, accommodation. I hate your place.”

“Who are you to judge my place?” Winter’s voice went slightly deeper, as a warning to Aeri to not say too much unnecessary stuff.

“You chose such a shady neighbourhood to stay in. Broken streetlights, abandoned buildings and I swore I saw some discarded needles and drugs somewhere at the corner of the alleyway. No surprise you got stabbed there. No offence .”

Winter closed her eyes, trying her best to remain calm. Sure it was not the best place to stay but she did anyway, since the rent was not that high compared to other places and even if the front door could be easily lock-picked—take Aeri for example—she had enough skills to ensure her own safety.

“And as far as I know, you have a licence for…motorcycles, cars, limousines and I think the last one is a private pilot licence, am I right?”

Winter didn’t reply, already knowing at this point, it was not a two way conversation. Aeri wouldn’t hear her. She shifted in her lying position, making herself comfortable. Her previous supervisor had always pushed her to her limits whenever they trained. It was no surprise to see how Winter would have the most licence compared to her peers given that her supervisor claimed that it would be useful in the long term.

But right now, it seemed like his ‘long term’ didn't seem to exist. Winter was shut out of everything, being forced to live like a normal person except that she had to start from nothing. His goal of making Winter the best agent out of all ended up in vain and Winter could never forget his stoic, rigid expression as he turned his back on her.

It felt like a betrayal, except that it was all her to blame.

“You’ll be the one to drive Karina around, so I expect you to be well-prepared. Karina has her own car, it’s just that she doesn’t have a licence so you’ll be the one to use it.”

“Why would she buy a car if she doesn’t have a licence?”

“Don’t ask me. Ask her.”

Winter heaved a sigh. This was basically why she didn’t get along with people like Aeri (read: rich, intimidating women). They just knew how to get on her nerves and it was bad enough considering her patience was running thin. She was almost shaking due to how hard she tried to keep it in.

Aeri placed her business card on the side of the bed before getting up on her feet.

“My card, though I know you’ve got my number already. Call me if you're interested in the offer. But this time, don’t call with a burner phone.”

Before she exited the door however, she turned around with a certain knowing smile painted on her lips. Winter knew that smile meant something .

“If you’re not interested, I’ll have to wish you good luck with the fees. This hospital offers quite a preeetty price. Bye!”

A string of curse left Winter’s lips.

Hazel eyes fluttered close. Remnants of the past threatened to crawl out. She saw it; the flashes of blood, screams and desperation. The burning shame and regret at the back of her throat, the ghost of paranoia dancing behind her eyelids, mocking, laughing menacingly. A small voice rang at the back of her mind, taunting, threatening.

Everyone dies in your hands.

She was way too wounded, way too tainted.

Would it be selfish for her to want to be close to Jimin?

Chapter Text

The light shifted, emanating ghostly sombre touches to the whole room. High heels gently clicked, its sounds echoed throughout the room just enough to drown out the heavy breaths. Karina stopped right in front of a dull grey couch, her royal blue dress pooled across the floor, its fabric cascading in elegant folds around her legs.

Red lips stretched into a condescending smile. 

Onyx eyes watched as the brown-haired guy weakly slumped on the couch, his head dropped against the backrest and arms were limp across the cushions. His gaze unfocused. Inebriated. 

“I like you better this way.” Karina’s deep voice carried an unmistakably sense of arrogance. Her ego was fed well enough seeing the most powerful, influential man like him managed to fall for her deceitful tricks, much less trusting her. Well, beauty privilege surely has its perks sometimes. “Looking so miserable, my boy?”

Lust was a man's fiend. 

It started off like a small flame, grazing the skin only for one to be addicted to its pain. They would be prone to chase after it, obsessed with the way that they could never get enough no matter how much they have gotten a taste. Without realising, the flames would grow larger and treacherous, just enough to engulf them to the point of no return.

And this brown-haired guy was a prey that had bitten off the bait, like a ravenous wolf scavenged for anything to satiate the hunger. Karina was the mastermind of all, her plans worked well for this fool never hesitated to take what was offered, not realising that the baits of lust were enough for her to do anything she wanted to him.

His words were barely coherent, only as loud as a mutter. She pursed her lips, knowing it was no use keeping him any longer.

“Don’t worry, I’ll end your suffering as painlessly as possible.”

He could hardly feel the cold tip of a gun pressed against his forehead for the adverse effect of the ingested drugs were taking its toll on him. Karina could not contain her giggle, her gaze mirthful as she didn’t hesitate to press the trigger. 

A loud bang deafened the whole place.

Her grin grew wider, more sickening upon seeing how his head was thrown back at the impact, red splattered all over the place. Death brought him in its embrace as fast and as quiet as it could be.

“ Cut !”

Karina’s gaze shifted; gentler and amiable. The staff started to fill in the film set and the brown-haired guy stood up from his previous position, a polite smile cast towards Karina, as to acknowledge her expertly executed acting to which she returned with a nod and a shy smile.

“Thank you for having me, you guys worked hard!”

As Jimin changed into her casual clothes, she noticed Yeji waiting outside the changing room. Yeji’s lips stretched into a smile as their gaze met and before Jimin could ask why she was here in the first place, Yeji explained that she was asked to accompany Jimin since there was still no replacement for Jimin’s manager.

The ride home was unexpectedly faster than she’d thought it would be.

Now that Jimin was stripped off from her Karina persona, she allowed herself to relax. She leaned further into the passenger seat, eyes glancing outside. To say her mind was a mess would be comprehensible. Things have been hectic these days, exceptionally so upon the fact that she had no manager to aid her in her schedule and time management.

Life goes on.

No matter what happened, time would flow, the world would revolve around its axis and Jimin had no choice but to pretend. She was always a great actress, after all, she had won numerous awards as a tribute for her noteworthy acting. But of course, there has always been a limit to a person’s deceit. Sometimes her mask would break, its pieces slipping through her fingertips like falling sand and she was left facing the hollowness of her own shell, the flawed and ruined Yu Jimin.

No matter where she went, she would always be the prey of those prying eyes.

Sure, it’s not all men who only saw her as prized possession, an object rather than a human with feelings. But how would she know which one was which? Most of them had the same look whenever they were looking at her.

That’s the whole problem wasn’t it?

But then again, she could only hate no one except herself. It was her fault for having this kind of body. It was her fault for being attractive in their eyes. It was her fault for letting them come closer. It was her fault for having them inappropriately touch her. Everything was her fault in the end, there was no point to argue.

It felt humiliating. 

The shame pooled in her stomach, spiking deep from within her. Sure, people would wonder whether she was an angel sent from heaven due to her good genes. But if anything, she felt a lot like falling from grace. Every inch of her skin felt dirty despite how much she scrubbed them all away. At one point it even formed abrasions on her skin and all she could do was cry herself to sleep— it was utterly pathetic that she couldn’t even live with herself.

“What’s on your mind?”

Jimin was brought back to reality upon hearing Yeji’s careful tone. She didn’t turn her head to glance at Yeji, but instead, simply let her gaze wander out of the window.

“A lot.”

“Care to share?”

“Can you…drop me off somewhere else? There was a convenience store near my place. I need to buy something.” She replied instead. “You don’t have to wait for me. It’s just a couple of minutes away from my apartment.”

Reluctance was visible in Yeji’s gaze but still, she relented. She was comfortable with Yeji but to have her witness Jimin in this state was not something she preferred. Yeji too, seemed to know that, seeing how she didn’t prod for more.

The bell dinged the moment she entered the store. The worker was seated behind the counter with his chin resting on his palm, his elbow propped on the counter and his eyes half closed, seemingly about to sleep anytime sooner. She brought the coat closer to her body, feeling the chill of the night even though she was already inside the store. Her steps are slow and aimless as her tired gaze scanned through the aisles.

She stopped once she was at the corner, secluded from the prying eyes.

“How long do I have to live like this…” She fought to hold back tears. She leaned against the refrigerator, forehead rested against the door. “It feels so tiring.”

Her words were laced with hidden deep, dark thoughts that swirled beneath. On normal occasions she would never allow herself to say those kinds of things that could lay herself bare and exposed. But at this moment, she was way too tired to care. She’d been living like a coward. She dreaded each day from the moment she opened her eyes, the shadows of fear strangling every fibre of her being until the moment she closed her eyes to sleep.

“Yu Jimin-ssi?”

Jimin stilled at the familiar voice, turning on her heels only to face a certain auburn haired woman, standing a few feets across her. 

Winter’s outfit was a bit different this time. Jimin was so used to seeing Winter in her casual clothes that it buffered her brain when the auburn haired woman sported a white collared shirt beneath a fitted dark blue vest with the sleeves rolled-up, paired with a high waisted dark blue pants and a belt, completing the whole look.

Her gaze, devoid of emotion, was fixed on Jimin— blank and still. Caught off guard at the unexpected presence, she staggered backwards until her back met with the door of the fridge. Her voice came out strained and hoarse, due to the fact that she was a bit emotional and also because she didn’t expect to see Winter here out of all places.

“W-Why are you here? Did you stalk me?”

A tilt of a head. That gaze remained emotionless, as if she wasn’t even bothered by the accusation. Jimin knew their encounter was simply a coincidence seeing how Winter actually was holding a can of instant latte, meaning that she wanted to buy something, unlike Jimin, who came here just to run away from being confronted by Yeji. Though she did wonder why Winter came to this store despite her house being at least 30 minutes away, without the traffic alone.

“Are you okay?”

“Of course I’m okay. Why wouldn’t I be?” Her tone was defensive, as if she wasn’t the one who hugged Winter to sleep two nights ago, as if Winter wasn’t the one who gently cradled her despite how badly she was used to being treated— in short, it was as if Winter was merely a stranger.

“You look pretty.” That sentence caught Jimin off guard. Her brain went into mush, not being able to think of anything even as Winter stepped closer, lessening their distance. Vanilla engulfed her senses. Those hazel eyes remained fixed, not even once faltering as they shifted from Jimin’s eyes, nose and down to her lips in such a painstakingly slow manner. Jimin unconsciously gulped. “Your makeup suits you.”

Right. Makeup.

Jimin didn’t remove her makeup yet, planning to do it once she was back home. Her grey coloured contact, intense eyeliner with dark eyeshadow, and dark deep red lipstick gave off quite a bold and alluring look— well, she was supposed to kill people in the storyline of the drama she was cast in, of course her stylists would give her intimidating makeup.

But that didn’t mean she wasn’t flustered by the comment.

Her heartbeat was fast, as if she’d just ran miles. Her initial negative thoughts dissipated at the back of the mind and she was left all warm and gooey. She swore she was sad just now, why did her mood change so rapidly, it’s unfair!

“I have a question to ask, if that’s okay with you.”

“W-What is it?”

“Why did you look at me like I’m some kind of a ghost?” Despite the lack of any intonation, Winter’s tone surprisingly didn’t contain any accusation. It was harmless. “Or did you pretend to forget the fact that you slept with me the other night?”

As stoic and emotionless Winter was, she secretly was a menace. Seemingly harmless in the first glance only to take you off your guard the next moment. A devil in disguise. And it only left Jimin in a blushing mess despite how hard she tried to act unaffected by the whole ordeal.

“E-Excuse me?” Were the only words that came out of her lips and it sounded painfully awkward and strained, as if she just got caught doing something unhinged.

Winter raised an eyebrow. Jimin hated herself for even having the audacity to think that she was attractive just by doing that. Well, who wouldn’t when Winter was there looking like… that !

Winter tilted her head, her gaze that was now oozing with confidence had never once left Jimin. In contrast to her calmness, there was Jimin who was a few seconds away from combusting due to how scorching her whole face was.

“Such a shame then…” Winter dragged her words, light and playful yet her eyes remained strong and unwavering. “I had a good time witnessing your clingy side. It’s not everyday I get to see you grabbing onto my shirt—”

Winter’s words were cut off rather abruptly by a painfully loud crash that effectively broke the tranquillity of the night itself. Both Jimin and Winter turned their heads towards the source, seeing the male worker scrambling up from his collapsed position on the floor, the various brands of instant noodles scattered around him.

Upon registering his frightened expression, Jimin finally realised how misleading Winter’s words seem to appear and if possible, her whole body felt like it was in flames. Out of panic, she pulled Winter to the nearest aisle where they were hidden from his gaze.

“Don’t say that without any context!” Jimin whisper-shouted.

Winter on the other hand seemed oblivious of the whole ordeal. Or maybe she knew, but she chose not to.

“Are you embarrassed to admit that you couldn’t sleep without me—” 

Jimin slapped her palm against Winter’s lips in sheer panic, her gaze alarmed. As if on cue, Winter’s eyes formed into crescents and she felt Winter’s lips stretched into a smile. Jimin heaved a sigh, feeling like her lifespan had been reduced to at least five years just because she had to be the victim of Winter’s teasing.

There was a shuffle which the actress assumed that the worker was probably sorting out the mess he had accidentally caused.

“ Mgghhff .”

“Huh?”

Winter raised an eyebrow, her gaze piercing right through Jimin as she raised her hand, one finger tapped onto Jimin’s hand twice to let her know that she was still covering Winter’s mouth.

“Oh right.” Jimin let her go. “Sorry.”

“Did it work?”

“What?”

“I’m distracting you.” There it was, the knowing gaze as if she had Jimin figured out already. Was Jimin too obvious or Winter was just good at reading people? “It’s getting late, you know. Want me to walk you home?”

“No.” 

The rejection was easy to slip off her lips, considering she was too used to hiding a piece of herself away from the others to witness and more than anything, she didn’t want the incident of the other night to be repeated. It was a burden for herself to carry and possibly a burden for Winter to mend every broken piece that wasn’t caused by her in the first place.

“Okay.” 

Winter accepted the rejection easier than Jimin expected. Even if she knew she shouldn’t be too flustered by it yet she somehow did, leaving her like a fish gasping for air as she simply watched Winter go to the counter to pay for her drink.

Winter left just as fast, the dinging of the bell indicated that Winter’s presence was already gone, leaving her alone to sort out her thoughts. It felt empty. It was odd to feel a palpable absence of a certain auburn haired woman despite how short their shared moment was. And it was even weirder to have a tinge of dismay tainting her heart, making her regret for saying no.

She yearned for Winter’s presence, even as brief as it could be.

Without realising, she found herself dashing out of the store, trying to find a familiar figure somewhere on the street. Winter was not too far, her lonely figure bathed by the streetlights as she kept getting further away from Jimin.

“ Winter-ssi !”

Her voice was loud, almost echoing throughout the empty street.

Winter stopped, turning around with the same unreadable expression sported on her face. Her auburn hair glowed warmer beneath the yellow glow of the streetlight and if possible, she appeared breathtaking, exceptionally so since that outfit really did its best in enhancing her figure as well as muffling Jimin’s brain further to oblivion.

For a second, she almost forgot what to say.

“Walk me home.” Her voice was laced by nothing but hopefulness and it would have sounded pathetic yet she swallowed it in, wishing Winter wouldn’t catch the desperation. Her brain racked to find a reason, only for her to repeat the same excuse as Winter. “It’s late.”

It was dumb. Jimin knew it’s dumb.

Yet nothing sort of emotions flickered in those hazel eyes.

“Okay.”

It was as easy as that.

They walked side by side, shoulders slightly brushing against each other, never really letting the unspoken words roll out of their tongue. Winter’s vanilla scent lightly filled in the air, carried away by the breeze. Jimin had a lot on her mind and they were nothing but desperate negativity clinging onto her like parasites. She was certain no one would appreciate being the one to receive her emotional dump— if she ever let herself be one, that is. So she chose the lightest topic she could think of.

“If I may ask, why are you here, in this neighbourhood?” The breeze that blew over them was just slightly colder and Jimin crossed her arms across her chest, trying to keep herself warm. “As far as I know your place is quite far.”

“ Ah. ” Winter’s voice was indifferent. “I was bored so I walked.”

“...That far?”

Winter’s blank gaze implied that she didn’t think of it as a big deal at all. As if this was her usual routine, going to far places for a walk in such late night. But then again, she was insomniac. She probably went out to kill some time right after work instead of cooping in her room. As much as Jimin hated to admit, Winter’s house itself lacked security and she wondered how the latter could live in such a condition. Jimin would surely have been paranoid every night, afraid if someone broke into the house. It wouldn’t be weird if Winter roamed outside instead.

Jimin nodded and decided to not pry further.

The silence however did not last long. Winter, who had just finished her drink, decided to stop. The can was left dangling by her side, dainty fingers loosely gripping on it. Noting something was off, Jimin followed suit, turning her body to fully face the auburn haired woman.

“You’ve been holding back a lot tonight.” Those words came out of Winter’s lips in a harmless statement. Her gaze gave nothing away.

Like you’re trying to hide everything? Like a coward? Jimin wondered whether those were the words Winter refused to say out loud. Just how much Winter could read her? How much of the remnants of her that she could hide?

Jimin felt dread crawling up her throat, constricting. Tears started pooling in her eyes. She remembered the rage of finding out her trust meant nothing seeing how people around her broke it apart like she was some kind of a joke. She remembered the hopelessness of not being able to do anything to save herself. She remembered how she could never truly be appreciated as she was.

It was just a bit of everything, gradually increasing without realising. Those looming emotions came crashing down on a random night and before she knew it, she could only search for Winter— as absurd as it sounded. Come to think of it, how bad she must have appeared back then for Winter to silently accept her despite the odd situation they ended up with. 

They were merely strangers after all. 

Strangers who happened to witness one’s worst state and could do nothing but offer comfort.

“It’s nothing to be worried about. Just feeling down a bit.” Jimin replied.

There was something heavy in the way Winter held her gaze, as if she wanted to say a lot yet she held back her words. For a moment they stood in silence, accompanied with the stillness of the late night.

“It’s okay to be flawed sometimes. You can’t always be perfect.”

That’s the problem.

Winter made her feel like it was okay to be flawed, it was okay to be just Yu Jimin. Because no matter what happens— even if Jimin bared her rawest soul, bloodiest form of vulnerability, displaying the ugliest side of her, Winter would embrace her just as she was. And that thought alone gave an unknown feeling stirring in her stomach, heavy and deep to the point she didn’t know whether it was a good thing or not.

Jimin’s jaw clenched.

“It’s ugly you know, the flaws.” She said instead. The air surrounding them was heavy and Jimin could feel her insecurities crawling up for everyone to witness. The shame it brought along was insufferable, choking her relentlessly.

“True.” Winter nodded. “But that doesn’t mean you’re not worthy at all. Someone like you deserves the world, Jimin-ssi.”

Jimin gnawed on her lower lip, feeling her resolve crumbling down beneath those watchful and gentle hazel eyes.

Am I?

Winter stepped closer. Jimin stayed rooted in her spot. A hand reached for Jimin’s face. Onyx eyes simply watched, not daring to do anything. Fingers brushing away the fringe, slipping it behind her ear. That small gesture brought warmth to Jimin’s face. Winter’s voice this time had a slight hint of gentleness, almost went unnoticed if it’s not for the quietness of the surroundings. 

“Maybe you can’t see it but if you’re in my position, you’d understand how much you deserve.” There was a slight curl of her lips, and even if it’s unlikely, Jimin wanted to believe that Winter was smiling at her. “You’ve gone through a lot. Being happy is the least you deserve.”

Jimin’s heart stuttered against her chest.

Winter seemed to know what to say. She always did somehow. It was unfair at a point, considering how little she knew about Winter yet the woman had witnessed a lot, knew Jimin like the back of her hand and had no problem reading her like she was an open book.

But there was something Jimin learned about vulnerabilities.

Those who we trust would be prone to hurt us just as badly. The betrayal would be a thousand times painful. It would be easier for Winter to break her, as much as she hated to admit. And the prospect of it was just terrifying.

But to have those pair of hazel eyes looking at her ever so gently and kindly, a part of her wanted to believe in Winter, as childish as it sounded.

Jimin's gaze stayed on Winter. She remembered how easily Winter caught her when she was falling, remembered how Winter was nothing but gentle and welcoming, remembered how Winter was nothing but kind. It was easy for her to open up her heart, giving away pieces of herself to Winter, thinking that the latter would never try to harm her.

Thus, accompanied by the silent night and lone moon above them, Jimin decided to take a leap of faith and let herself believe.

Chapter Text

Yu Jimin was a bright girl.

Used to be.

Her amiable personality along with an endless spark of happiness only brought people in, attracting them like a sunflower to a sun, like a bee to honey. She grew up in a loving family and it was perfect. Her father was as gentle and protective as he could be and her mother would never fail to entertain Jimin with whatever shenanigans the girl had.

That was until one incident.

It was during senior year of high school. A boy approached her while she was studying alone at the library, informing that the PE teacher had called for her and was currently waiting in the sports inventory room. She knew him, Kim Hansoo, the school basketball player that earned quite popularity among the students. As naive as she was, she blindly followed him to the room and only noticed something was wrong where there was no teacher in sight and by the time she turned around, the door was locked and he was slowly approaching her with the most sickening smile.

Little did she know, it was the biggest nightmare that she could ever experience in all of her life.

Filthy hands on her, her trembled pleads, bruised wrists trying to fight him. Her shouts echoed, reaching no one’s ears considering the lateness of the time. And it was more pathetic upon hearing her own fear-gripling voice yet she couldn’t save herself. Only God knew how dread clutched her to the bones, desperation shook her to the core to the point all she could think was, she’d rather die of the most painful death rather than being the slave to his twisted and sick desires.

He was an animal and she was the victim of his barbaric acts behind the closed doors, away from the prying eyes.

“Seriously, why the hell can’t you stay still?”

As his hands squeezed her airways, nails pressing the skin, she could barely do anything— not when he was on top of her, already taking control of the situation. She didn’t really know what happened afterwards, all she wanted was to escape this hell to which she ended up grabbing whatever she could in the midst of all the haziness and pain.

With a single desperate hit, his body was thrown to the side and hit the racks. But the way he advanced towards her, so full of rage and hatred, she freaked out further and hit him before he could reach her. She closed her eyes, a blood-curdling scream left her lips as she kept hitting and hitting. Again. Again and again.

The tennis racket broke into half. Her shaky hands gripped onto whatever she could. A baseball bat almost slipped out of her hand— he gripped her wrist. Her blood ran cold.

She didn’t know if her prayers to the God above were answered but the next time she knew, the room was a mess as crimson splattered across the four-walled space. Some were dripping from the broken tennis racket and her clothes. She didn’t know which blood was hers and which was his. His body was limped across the fallen sports stuff, blood pooled around his head. Jimin was a mess. Her hair strewn across her face, her shirt was torn, exposing her bare shoulder and her face and body filled with bruises and cuts, some were deep gash whilst the rest were light. Her skirt was slightly ridden up and the ghost of his touches burned still.

He didn’t manage to do much.

She was thankful about it— though the price she had to pay for her actions were much, much worse .

Her sobs were convulsing and her whole body couldn’t just stop trembling. Her bloodied nails pricked against the skin of her arms as she hugged herself. Her voice stuck to her throat, as if being ripped off an ability to speak. Nothing ever came out.

Nothing ever came out as Kim Hansoo’s family came and his father slapped her just as hard, as her own father’s concern glance was etched on her, as her mother brought her into her embrace, and as the police interrogated her. Nothing ever came out days after, when her classmates distanced themselves away as they threw cautious glares because they only knew that she had hurt the school gem to the point of him being hospitalised. Nothing ever came out even after she was transferred schools and just like that, happiness no longer flickered across her features.

Maybe, just maybe , she should be grateful to not be thrown to jail since her case was concluded as self-defence.

Even if she ended up like a living dead more than an actual person, even if her relationship with her parents drifted apart, even if the years she spent after were a mere chasing her dreams until she bled out to dry instead of actually living her life. Life only felt alive when she met Aeri, a transfer student from Japan who came to her life on a random sunny day.

It was scorching hot and beads of sweats formed on her forehead and nape. She had just finished helping out some theatre students preparing for the upcoming play when Aeri approached her without a single smile adorning her face.

“Your shoelaces are untied.”

Yes they were, except that she didn’t bother. But instead of walking away like how normal people would, Aeri didn’t hesitate even once as she crouched down to tie them instead. 

And that was technically how Aeri managed to tie Jimins’ broken pieces back to whole. Despite not all, she still managed. They got close pretty easily, their free time that aligned quite well made it easier for them to meet up between the piled up assignments and final year projects despite having different faculty—Aeri was in business while Jimin was in performing arts. 

It was a norm for people to drift apart due to the circumstances. Even people who used to be her friends during high school no longer stay in contact with her but she was surprised by how Aeri and her managed to stay together despite everything.

Years passed by like a blur and by the name of Karina Yu, she could finally see the rewards of all the blood, sweat, and tears she had poured into her efforts. It didn’t take a night to reach the top. It wasn’t easy climbing the hurdles and she had a lot to improve, she was grateful enough that her efforts weren’t in vain. But of course, she should have expected this by now. No matter where she goes, not everyone truly sees her.

Most saw her as an object, something to be owned.

And she couldn’t do anything about that, could she?

But then again, there was this person who had never once looked at her the way she was used to be looked upon. Winter . Her gaze was empty and void of any emotions, much less any thoughts (Jimin didn’t know whether she was awfully bad at reading Winter or maybe it just… is ). No admiration, no fascination, no lust, nor recognition—not even the slightest bit. That certain eventful night, Jimin experienced what it felt like to not be known and recognised, experiencing a stranger’s kindness in a form of nothing but gentleness.

Everything was just so delicate, soft and warm; a foreign sensation for Jimin, who felt utterly unworthy of such comfort. 

That night, the one Winter was with was just Yu Jimin, the same girl who got trauma-induced mutism after being almost sexually assaulted back in the confinement of the gym room, the same girl that had lost her will to live the moment she drifted apart from everyone she once loved, the same girl that shed no tears when her mother’s funeral was held, the same girl that brought grief and torment like a baggage and carry it on her back because she didn’t know how to put them all down.

She wondered whether it was her selfish desires. But unknowingly she gravitated towards the owner of those hazel eyes.

It was almost a no-brainer for her to drag her limbs to a certain destination when her mind was too much for her to handle, when her cries no longer relieve the pain, when the numbness overpowered her rational thinking. And it was almost effortless how with a single look Winter cast on her, it was like Jimin was an open book, easily to be read. It was bad, it used to be a bad thing considering Winter could take advantage of her vulnerability, twist and bend Jimin just the way she willed. But there was something in the way Winter treated her that made it easy to put her trust on her.

It was dangerous how pliant Jimin was towards her. Winter could use her just as much as she wanted to and Jimin would possibly let her. Jimin knew if that day ever comes, she would be akin to a marionette, her conscious thoughts became mere shadows lingered behind as she moved upon Winter’s desires and commands. Unbeknownst to her, she had surrendered herself. Even if regret were to ensnare her with its haunting tendrils, pulling her deeper into an abyss of despair, that grief would be hers alone to savour.

“Karina.”

That name was uttered in a clear and concise tone.

Jimin blinked. Her gaze shifted as she kept her front; Karina Yu. A twirl of heels, onyx eyes met deep brown eyes. Leaning against the door frame, Uchinaga Aeri had a smile painted on her face as she raised one hand for a wave. The waiting room was empty, no staff members nor stylists in it except for Karina. The shooting had long finished and she had changed into more comfortable clothes. There were only a few crew members left and they were all outside whilst Karina preferred to be inside, her social battery had already drained.

“Why are you here?”

“To take you home.”

“You know that’s not your job.”

“Even as your friend?”

“You shouldn’t bother.” Karina took her bag, slinging it over her shoulder. “I can take an Uber.”

“Is that a rejection?”

She exited the room, brushing past Aeri. “Anything you want it to be.”

A hand encircled on Karina’s wrist, halting her steps. Their eyes met.

“We’ve got you a new manager.” Aeri paused, noting that her sentence brought Karina’s attention. “I’ll take you home while I tell you about it. Sounds good?”

Not really having the energy to resist, Karina simply nodded.

Roses scent engulfed Jimin once she was inside Aeri’s car. As Aeri drove them out of the shooting site, Jimin glanced outside, letting the tranquillity of the night ease her senses. Aeri’s voice was calmer, Jimin noted. Maybe it was due to the lateness of the time or maybe she was just tired but Jimin didn’t try to pry. From what Aeri explained, Jimin’s new manager didn’t tag along with her because Mr. Ahn was holding her back for a few more discussions which in return, allowed Aeri to fetch her instead.

“What do you mean, that person is staying in my place?” Jimin perked up, sitting upright in her seat and stared at Aeri intensely. “It’s my place, Aeri. I cannot just share my personal space with a stranger.”

Aeri’s gaze met hers for a brief second before she averted it to the road ahead and Jimin couldn’t help but notice the knowing glint within. There seemed to be unspoken words, to which only made Jimin arch her eyebrow in scepticism. 

“Your manager is a woman.” Aeri said instead.

“And what does it have to do with anything?”

“It’s a woman. Women are good!” The COO exclaimed. “And it’s just for the time being, while I request my secretary to find a new place for her to live.”

“I refuse to live with a stranger. That. Is. My. House.”

A laugh left Aeri’s lips, which only made Jimin dumbfounded more than anything.

“You remember there was that one time your so-called fan hid in your closet for a whole freaking day just to wait for you to come home? Or the time when you suddenly got a back hug from your crazy neighbour?” The light turned red. Deep brown eyes met with onyx ones. “Let’s just think of this as a precautionary measure to prevent such incidents from happening. Mrs. Bae has been having a migraine for three months now. We don’t want her to end up in a hospital, do we? Besides, the HR department and executive department already approved her too. And she’s not just going to be your manager, she’s capable of being a bodyguard too. It’s a jackpot!”

Jimin went quiet. It was quite bizarre to have most of the departments approve so easily, there must be something— either this person’s resume was excellent or she applied for this position with the help of an insider. Either way it’s just suspicious how everyone would agree just like that. Furthermore, Mrs. Bae was the scariest woman alive, you have to be considered lucky to be out of her office pissing your pants because others had it worse.

The light turned green.

“This person is not corrupt, isn’t she?”

“I can assure you she’s not. Have faith in us, Jimin-ah.”

There was a shift in the atmosphere soon after that nickname left Aeri’s lips. Despite the reluctance, Jimin heaved a sigh, already hating how her upcoming days would be. Bitterness present in her tone still.

“It’s not like I have any other choice.”

There was a moment of silence before Aeri spoke, her voice sounded gentler and softer. “One week. Give me one week to find a new place for her then she’ll move out, okay?”

Lack of privacy. Compatibility issues. Lifestyle differences. Limited personal space. Communications. Oh , Jimin just knew it would be a disaster and she was definitely not excited for this.

“One more thing.” Aeri’s voice brought Jimin to reality once again. “She’s going to stay in your place starting tonight.”

Onyx eyes fluttered close. Jimin took a deep breath to calm herself. Great . Just great. She wasn’t even given the time to properly prepare her mind for this whole thing. She was somehow glad her apartment was not that messy in the first place since she only came to sleep and lounge around, sometimes if she had a mood, she would cook.

Suddenly she dreaded coming home.

“Too sudden, Uchinaga.” Were all she said before getting out of Aeri’s car. If the door handle snapped a bit upon the movement, Aeri didn’t comment on it. “Too sudden.”

“You’ll manage, Yu.” Aeri’s voice was nothing but genuine. “I trust that you will.”

No she won’t. Jimin had been slumped against the wall of the elevator as she waited for it to reach her floor. And she couldn’t help but hate the thought of being closer and closer to her apartment. Every step felt like walking through a muddy field, so heavy and painfully annoying.

Why is the world so unfair? I can’t even breathe properly all this time and today everyone decided to give me a heart attack. This is so tiring to live, please dear ground, just swallow me whole and never let me return…

Upon reaching her front door, she lazily pressed the passcode, hearing the beep before she pushed it open. Her movement was mindless, ridden by muscle memory as she took off her shoes and switched on the lights—only to realise that it was already turned on. Her gaze swept across the living room only for her to pathetically scream her lungs out in terror.

There was someone in the living room. The luggage on her side proved a lot that this person was her new manager. But still, a little heads up would be nice!

That person’s back was facing her but turned around soon after the scream was heard. Jimin instantly stood frozen in place, every fibre of her being went rigid. If anything one would think she had a rigour mortis if it was not over the fact that she was actually breathing and alive.

“Winter?”

And it was the familiar emotionless hazel eyes staring back at her. 

Winter was different. Jimin’s brain malfunctioned further upon realising this whole new look of Winter was one thing that she could never survive. A tailored fitted vest in a warm beige colour perfectly hugged her figure, paired with a high-waisted trouser and a blazer. Clean and sophisticated. She probably smelled nice too— okay Jimin, focus!

“W-Why are you here?”

“I was informed that I’ll be staying here for the meantime.”

Right . Of course.

“Who gave you my passcode?”

“Miss Uchinaga.”

Jimin gnawed on her lower lip, not impressed in the slightest.

“Of course she did…”

Jimin stood there for a moment, not really knowing what she needed to do. It took her an extra few seconds to finally get to her senses and when she did, she went inside, extending her hand out towards Winter. Her dark grey overcoat somehow felt stuffy and she didn’t know whether it was due to the lack of cold air or due to Winter’s watchful gaze.

“Nice to meet you, Winter. I’m looking forward to working with you.”

Winter’s hand was cold, just slightly larger than her. Her grip was firm as she shook Jimin’s hand. As Jimin pulled her hand back, she couldn’t help but think that odds were never in her favour for these past months. But then again, fate decided to add a little twist and trick up its sleeves by always leading her to Winter— her little sanctuary.

There was a slight shift in Winter’s gaze, Jimin noticed. Something indescribable.

“I’ll do my best to keep you safe, I promise.”

There was one thing about promises. They were meant to be broken. But there was just the way Winter uttered in the most absolute certainty that somehow allowed Jimin to hope, even just the slightest bit. In the quiet walls that her apartment had to offer, Jimin’s lips gently pulled up into a smile.

Maybe, just maybe, this was their beginning.

***

The call connected.

“Yes, darling?”

There was a slight hesitation in her voice. “Aeri, can you…”

“Yes?”

“I-I think I’ll be okay staying with her for the time being. Just take your time finding a new place for her.”

Silence.

“ Heh .”

Chapter Text

“Why are you so…” Hazel eyes met onyx ones. Karina hesitated, trying to find the right word. “...rigid?”

“You don’t like it?”

Karina pursed her lips into a thin line. She took a step closer, closing their distance. Her hands rested on Winter’s shoulders, fingers feeling the fabric of the pitch black blazer before they traced down to its lapels. Onyx eyes were dark, unreadable.

Hazel eyes trailed on the movement before averted away. Warmth travelled down Winter’s nape.

“I think…maybe it’s not so bad.” Jimin’s voice was gentle, carrying a hint of intimacy and warmth only reserved for them. Her hand rested on the lapels, pressed right against Winter’s chest. “But when we’re alone you can relax. No one would judge us then.”

Jimin’s statement made Winter ponder. How suffocating it must have felt to have everyone breathing down your neck. One wrong move and you’ll be dragged down to hell. Only when you’re behind the closed doors that you’re allowed to breathe.

Winter learnt a lot working with Jimin.

Winter was used to the hectic situation and schedules considering all the training she had done back when she was an agent were much worse. Furthermore, she was well-briefed regarding the scope of her work so it was none of her concern since she could handle it all by herself. Handling Jimin was not like handling an emo teenager going through puberty nor it felt like she was being treated like a slave— some people had the tendency to treat those lower than them in a humiliating way and Winter was just lucky to know that Jimin wasn’t that kind of person who had some kind of inferiority complex.

Jimin was just…Jimin.

She was like an obedient little cat as she quietly listened to Winter’s instructions regarding the schedules and anything else. But at the same time, her confidence was like endless flames, enough to leave one’s jaw agape and leave apparent traces behind whenever she was in her element. Her smiles were amiable, as if properly calculated and planned as she cast it for the world to witness— just enough combination of politeness and charm but then, there was just a little hint of warmth whenever that smile was directed towards Winter. Sometimes when Winter bought an iced americano for her right before her schedule or when Winter gave her a blanket upon noticing her shivering, Winter would witness that smile.

(That smile was downright adorable.)

Cold and warm.

Karina Yu was cold whilst Jimin Yu was warm.

There seemed to be quite a big difference between the two personas, Winter noticed. She was well aware of how Karina could intimidate the whole room without even laying a finger but now that she was breathing the same air as her, it was not a joke. Karina didn’t hesitate to come close to Winter, sharing the same space as she fixed the lapels of her suit or the slightly askew collar. Karina’s smile was cunning and nonchalant and if anything, Winter was the one slightly bothered by her boldness. It was hard to read Karina’s mind, as if she had closed off any cracks perfectly, leaving no room to slip in.

Jimin, on the other hand, was the clumsy woman that tripped over her own feet sometimes. Jimin would trudge to the kitchen with such messy hair akin to a failed scientist just because she was randomly craving some chocolate. Jimin was a person whose face reddened whenever she ended up in an awkward or embarrassing situation. And Jimin would lose track of time once she was occupied with cats.

The stark difference was intriguing to say the least.

But working with Jimin was also challenging.

Not the Jimin-Karina kind of challenging but more like an outer distraction kind of challenging. It was quite baffling to know how many men were unethical in this industry. And it was even funnier to even witness that most of them were pretending behind the calm and kind exterior.

You can never fool Winter Kim for a keen eye like hers could see through the deception— as easy as breathing.

Winter’s expression was just as emotionless as her icy cold gaze was set to a certain black-haired man that was conversing with a few staff members. They were somewhere at the corner of the room, not wanting to interfere with the photographer who was doing his best in taking good shots of Jimin. The actress was chosen to be the ambassador of one of the most known brands and the concept was dark and elegant, which Jimin effortlessly showcased her beauty, like how she had always done. It was just that Winter noticed sometimes this man would casually walk around Jimin when she was out of the shooting spot to have her makeup or hair fixed, his phone camera discreetly went down to snap whatever it could.

Jimin was wearing quite a short dress, that much alone seemed to make a pervert like him take his filthy chance.

“ Woah— ” The guy was taken aback when Winter suddenly slid right in front of him. His eyes raked down to her body, clearly scrutinising her. “How may I help you? You’re Karina’s manager I suppose?”

Winter took a step closer. He took a step back, bewilderment painted his features, probably not used to having such emotionless gaze stared right at him.

“Bodyguard.”

He glanced up and down, noting her light grey bespoke suit (an outfit that a manager wouldn’t wear on a daily occasion) and his lips trembled, proving a lot that he was trying to refrain from smiling. Her expression remained stoic.

He was obviously belittling her capabilities, not believing that lithe stature could be seen as strong and even capable of taking down a man. Indeed, most people would think the same considering she was seen as weak. But her agility and reflexes were not something to be underestimated. It was a charm in its own way.

“Are you sure, miss? You seem like the type to be needing protection instead.”

“Try me.”

“Alright, it’s a wrap. Thank you for all of your hard work!” A voice somewhere around the set exclaimed, followed by a series of thank you’s and you’ve worked hard’s from the staff members and stylists.

Winter finally stepped back. She raised her hand that was holding a phone, pressing the on button. His eyes went wide upon noting the familiar wallpaper. He searched for his phone around his pockets, realising that the phone in Winter’s grip was indeed his. He reached over to grab his phone but she avoided him, her other leg was deliberately positioned so that he would stumble upon it.

He pathetically fell down to the floor.

“You seem like the type to be needing protection… sir .” Winter twirled her heels, looking down at him. Indifferent. She flicked his phone upwards, witnessing his panicked movements as he tried to catch it.

Winter didn’t bother to entertain him, turning around to head towards the dressing room. She placed one hand into the inner pocket of her blazer to keep the USB. She had planted a virus on his phone via USB exploits and it would take around thirty minutes for it to fully breach the data, making it less noticeable that she was the one who did it. And even if he did accuse her later on, there was no proof.

“You know that guy?” Karina's husky voice greeted her the moment she stepped into the waiting room. Karina was sitting on the seat, still wearing the black dress as she took off her necklace and earrings, putting them in their respective boxes. Eloquence filling in each movement. 

Karina’s gaze met hers from the mirror and the dark smokey makeup adorned made her appear more intimidating than usual. Onyx eyes narrowed. Winter tried to act as usual despite the warmth dusted her cheeks.

“No.”

Winter went to grab the duffel bag, zipping it open to take out a white crop top, an outerwear and sweatpants. The room was filled with gentle chatter since there were around two or three other people aside from them, reducing their privacy to none. Winter didn’t bother, simply taking the clothes and placing them on an empty spot of the table.

“What are you guys talking about?” Karina stood up, one hand reaching for the clothes, her dark eyes settled on Winter. The heels she wore effectively made her taller, her figure towering over Winter to which the latter feigned indifference despite feeling slightly caught off guard by the sudden increase of height difference.

“He said that I need to be protected.” Winter lowered her voice. “He doesn’t believe I’m your bodyguard.”

Ruddy lips curled into a smile.

“Fair enough. It’s hard to believe a cute face like you doesn’t need to be protected.” Onyx eyes travelled down to her lips for a split second before meeting Winter’s gaze again. “If I could, I would wrap you up with a blanket and keep you away from the world.”

It sounded less of a ridicule but more like a statement. And Winter’s face involuntarily heated up over the fact that Karina was complimenting her looks. Karina’s gaze lingered a bit longer than necessary. Winter wondered if there was something on her face but knowing there was none once she glanced at the mirror, she simply raised an eyebrow.

A poke on her cheek.

Karina leaned closer, lessening their proximity. Black opium fragrance filled her senses.

A caress of whisper, warm breath hitting the side of her face.

“Your face is red.” Were all Karina uttered before walking past Winter to change her clothes, her black opium perfume lingered in the air even as she left.

Winter absentmindedly reached for her face, noting its warmth against her cold fingers.

Oh.

***

The ride home was filled with silence.

Winter glanced to the side, noting that Karina was still not asleep, eyes casted to the window. Taking the chance, she held the steering wheel with one hand whilst the other went to the back of the seat. She took a plastic bag and placed it on Karina’s lap. Karina threw her a confused look as she rummaged through the plastic, noting there were a few drinks and breads.

“What’s this for?”

“You didn’t eat today.” Winter responded with the usual lack-of-warmth tone. “I didn’t know your favourites so I just took whatever I could.”

“Winter.” There was a palpable pause, as if Karina was carefully articulating the words in her mind, afraid if she spoke the wrong words. It took her a moment before she finally said, “You’re good at your job. Say, have you been a manager before this?”

Winter licked her lips, noting the choice of words Karina had said. Maybe she didn’t want to be vulnerable today, her stance and way of talking had a certain defensiveness in it, as if she was trying to cover up as much as she could tonight. And she still kept her Karina upfront, which pretty much explained a lot.

“Not a manager,” Winter replied, indulging whatever she could, knowing there was no harm in it. “Just escorting a few important people.”

There was a rustle as Karina tore open the bread packaging. She took the cream bread, Winter noted. Karina finished it in just a few bites before she took another one, cheese bread this time. It was quite a bold choice considering both had quite high calories but then again, the actress hadn’t eaten since morning because she was swept up by work and the only thing she consumed was green tea Winter bought for her between the schedules. Winter offered to buy some food but was declined by Karina who claimed that she wasn’t hungry.

A smack of the lips, followed by a curious, “Winter.”

“Mhmm.”

“That’s not your real name.” Winter’s gaze hardened. The grip on the steering wheel was just a tad tighter. “Right?”

Winter didn’t reply. Karina’s gaze on hers was slightly darker, unknown. With a turn on the right, Winter went to the basement parking lot, effortlessly parked the car near where the elevator was placed. There was a soft chuckle, sounding very clear amidst the deafening silence. Then a finger, tracing the side of Winter’s nape. That touch alone felt like it was burning, leaving traces of goosebumps on its wake.

Black opium filling her lungs.

As if delirious, Karina’s words slightly slurred.

“You’re tense.” Winter turned her head to witness a languid smile forming on the latter’s lips. Her gaze was indescribable. Her hand rested on Winter’s shoulder, its warmth could be felt against the fabric. Winter tried not to move too much, noting that Karina was resting her hand on Winter’s still-recovering shoulder. “It’s true isn’t it?”

“It is indeed my name.”

“You’re Korean.” Karina spoke as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“I am.”

“Exactly. There’s no way your parents could think to name you Winter as soon as you were born. They could name you normally like…Chaeyoung, Minji, Hana, Sooah, Harin. There are plenty of names out there. Do you even like winter?”

“Not really.”

Onyx eyes narrowed. Her voice dripped with something more, something that Winter couldn’t really figure out but knew Karina was not going to let her go any sooner. “Then why?”

“I was born during the winter season.” Those words slipped out of Winter’s lips so easily, something considered as half-lie and half-truth if she were to be honest.

Karina leaned closer.

“Stop lying.” The hand went back up to hold her nape, gripping it. Winter tried not to be affected by the fact that Karina’s thumb was pressing the centre of her neck, enough to disturb her normal breathing. Karina’s voice went deeper. “When you told me your name back then I thought it was merely a nickname or some sort. But when I look at the system it was your real name. That is just absurd.”

“In which way?” Winter uttered her words ever so meticulously, not wanting to sound like a wheezing chicken. Winter stared right at Karina, noting the dilating pupils. Then it clicked. Realisation dawned on Winter like a bucket of cold water. “Karina-ssi, did you eat or drink something aside from what I bought you?”

Jimin’s lips stretched wider into an amused grin.

“I don’t remember…” Jimin’s hand went up to grab a handful of Winter’s hair, her body leaned further towards the latter to the point Winter was trapped in such a small space. “Your hair looks pretty, it suits you. And you smell nice too, I like it.”

Winter went up to press her hand against Jimin’s nape, feeling its warmth. Hazel eyes scrutinised the actress. Flushed neck and face. Dilated pupils. Sweating. 

She let out a harsh breath.

MDMA— ecstasy.

Someone drugged Jimin.

“Your hand is cold.” The actress commented, her tone still as delirious.

“Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, it feels good. It’s just…I feel hot.”

Winter bit her lip, her gaze went around the place to see if there were any suspicious parked cars or people. Noting that there was none, she spoke again except this time her voice reduced to a whisper.

“Can I carry you home?”

“Bridal style?”

A flash of confusion went across Winter’s face but it was gone as fast as it came.

“Piggyback.”

Jimin shook her head, shifting closer until there was no space left between them. Winter tried not to move, considering Jimin had practically squished her from the top and feeling a sturdy sensation of a door against her back was a bit painful if she moved too much. Black opium perfume filled her senses, rendering her lightheaded.

“I want a bridal style.”

“No.” Winter tried again. “Piggyback.”

“Bridal style.”

After a moment of contemplation, Winter finally obliged.

Winter ended up carrying Jimin in her arms. The duffle bag was slung across her body whilst the rest of their stuff that Winter deemed wasn’t so important was left in the car. Winter kept her senses heightened, suspecting that they were still in the radar or whoever had tried to drug Jimin.

Her instinct was proven to be true when the elevator doors slid open to reveal a man in all black, standing at the end of the hallway, facing them. A black cap obscuring his face, black shirt and leather jacket. Possibly this person had a motorcycle, Winter supposed, noting the slightly askew collar of the jacket that was probably caused by the wind.

“I’m thirsty.” Jimin’s warm breath hitting her nape, enough for Winter to realise that she was still carrying her.

The man steadily advanced towards them.

“Later, princess.” Winter gently put her down, making sure she could stand all by herself. Winter took off the duffel bag, holding it with one hand as her other hand held Jimin’s waist. “Be still for me, you can do that, yeah?”

Jimin was a giggly mess as she leaned against Winter for support. Her body was warm against Winter. She tried to feign indifference despite how her heart threatened to rip out of her chest.

“Let’s play a game.” Winter proposed, pushing Jimin until she was leaning against the wall. “Close your eyes, count until sixty and I will make that man vanish. Don’t open your eyes even if you hear weird sounds. Can you do that for me?”

It was just a simple task but probably Jimin was more excited over the fact that Winter mentioned ‘a game’ to which the latter didn’t waste any time to cover her eyes with her hands and count. Winter took the cue and threw the duffel bag towards him. Taking the advantage, she slid across his side and elbowed the back of his knees. He kneeled involuntarily and she turned around to wrap an arm around his neck, choking his airways.

He elbowed her side a few times, making sure her grip slackened before turning around to land a punch on her face. She held his knuckles midway, her other hand went to strike his ears. She pushed him off her, the force enough for him to slide across the tiles.

A groan left his lips.

“Be quiet.” Winter huffed. “It’s annoying.”

“23…24…25…”

He lurched towards her, holding what Winter noticed was a knife as he tried to land a few strikes towards her. She dodged every attack, landing a sharp punch on his rib and jaw. She took a few steps back to create the distance, her back was facing the elevator doors.

She pressed the button.

“37…38…”

He threw the knife, slicing through the air in such a swift movement. As she dodged the knife, he ran forward to land a kick on her stomach. She grabbed his leg, twisting it until she heard a crack. He shouted in pain but was soon cut off by a swift punch on his solar plexus, throat, jaw and nose. His head was thrown back, enough for the cap to slip out of his head. The elevator doors slid open and she grabbed a fistful of his shirt, pushing him into the elevator.

His face was unfamiliar. Maybe he was not the one who drugged Karina.

“Are you the one who drugged Karina?” She asked nonetheless.

Amidst the blood running down from his nose, he mustered up a smile. His voice was scratchy and hoarse, probably ruined by the punch earlier.

“It’s a gift from the Boss.”

Her jaw clenched. She banged his head against the elevator doors, its noise echoed throughout the empty hallway. Her other hand pressed the button to make sure the elevator doors stayed open.

“Who sent you here?”

“Take a guess…”

“No need.”

A punch at the side of his neck was enough to send him out cold. His limp body dropped down with a resounding thud.

“56…57…”

She stepped out, taking the fallen knife and threw it into the elevators before closing the doors. A napkin was taken out from the pocket breast, wiping her hands. She went to Jimin’s side, placing her hands on top of Jimin’s.

“And…sixty!”

Winter lowered Jimin’s hands, letting the raven-haired woman look around. Curiosity was clear in her gaze before it was filled with astonishment. She simply let Jimin in her excitement phase, reaching towards the duffle bag and slung it across her body.

“Woah, how did you make him disappear?! You’re amazing really…”

Winter turned to look at Jimin.

“You can walk right?”

Jimin instantly sat down and sprawled her legs. Both of her arms extended out as she made grabby hands. Winter couldn’t help but scoff.

This woman, really…

Winter ended up carrying her to the front door despite it being just a few feets away from them and if possible, Jimin was being more agitated than before. Her dangling feet were jiggling and her hands were everywhere— pinching Winter’s cheeks, massaging her nape, tapping her nose, tickling the underside of her chin. It was a bit hard to key in the passcode but Winter managed.

“You want me to put you here or in your bedroom?”

Jimin’s eyes were starry, as if Winter was her knight in shining armour. Her voice was breathless. “Bedroom please.”

Winter’s mind was elsewhere, trying her hardest to think how in a world someone could slip ecstasy into Jimin’s water or food or whatever. She tried to recall anything suspicious except that she couldn’t, considering there were many people at the shooting site and it was easier for these kinds of things to happen.

“I feel hot.” Jimin said as soon as she was being placed onto the bed.

“Sure you do.” Winter shrugged off her blazer, placing it on the coat rack. She took off her necktie and unbuttoned the top two buttons, giving her room to breathe. The fight earlier made her feel a bit stuffy wearing layers of clothes, not to mention she had to carry a certain large puppy all the way to the bedroom. “Take it off then, once I’m out of the room, of course.”

Jimin’s lips pursed in a comical way and Winter couldn’t help but find her adorable, especially with her flushed cheeks. 

“Can you take them off for me?”

“You’re not five.”

“But…but I can be five just for you.”

Winter took a deep breath. That sounded quite ridiculous. She wondered how those kinds of words could ever slip past those lips.

“No need.” A sigh. “Just do it yourself. I’ll head out.”

Winter was about to take her blazer to head out when she heard a resounding thud. A soft giggle followed.

“Winter…Winter…” Another giggle. “Winter, Winter, Winter, Winter.”

Winter’s eyes fluttered closed, counting for three seconds before turning around. Jimin was on the floor, the outerwear somehow twisted around her arms and head and…Winter didn’t know how that could even happen. She reached by Jimin’s side, adjusting her arms and took off the outerwear, properly this time, before placing it on the bed. She pulled the woman up to sit on the bed, pushing her shoulders until the latter was lying down.

Jimin held her wrist.

Hazel’s eyes met onyx ones. Delirious. A slow cunning smile made its way across the actress’s lips. Winter took her time taking her in. Flushed neck, dusty pink cheeks, pitch black hair thrown across the white sheets, heaving chest.

She’s breathtakingly pretty. Too pretty to be true.

“Don’t go please.” 

Winter blinked. Her resolutions were slowly crumbling down and she pretty much knew it. But it’s not like she could help herself. 

“If you’re pleading with that kind of smile, it only makes me want to run away, Karina-ssi.” It was an excuse, but no one needed to know that.

“No, sorry I won’t smile.” Jimin forced her lips down, except that it didn't work because she only appeared silly. The corner of Winter’s lips slightly curved. “You’re just pretty and it feels warm. So warm. It feels weird inside and I just wanna laugh.”

“You’re pretty too, Karina-ssi.” She heaved. Her voice sounded a tad apologetic. “I just don’t like that they targeted you just because they wanted to warn me.” Her other hand reached to brush away the fringe on Jimin’s face. She gnawed on her lower lip, regret washed over her like a tidal wave. “I’m sorry.”

“Tell me your name and I’ll forgive you.”

Winter froze, like a deer caught in headlights. Jimin’s gaze was darker and there was no hint of a smile on her lips. She swore this sudden shift of attitude could get her a whiplash.

“At this point you’re just toying with me, aren’t you, Karina-ssi?”

“You’re not Winter.”

“I am Winter.”

“I want your real name.”

“It’s Winter.”

“It can’t be that easy.”

“It is that easy.”

Silent.

“If you don’t tell me your name I’ll shout.”

“No you won’t dare, it’s nearing one in the morni—”

Winter visibly flinched when a shrilling scream left Jimin’s lips, her voice was surprisingly high-pitched and loud, enough to be the sole destruction of mankind itself. Out of panic Winter placed her hand against Jimin’s mouth, muffling her scream yet the latter was persistent, not once stopping. Jimin tried to push her off but she used her other hand to grab Jimin’s hands and pushed them against the sheets.

“Fine, I’ll tell you!”

Miraculously, Jimin stopped. Her muffled giggle vibrated against the palm of Winter’s hand. Winter sighed in defeat. There was just no way she could handle Jimin like this for another three and four hours, she was already exhausted now.

“Kim Minjeong.”

Winter took a deep breath, suddenly feeling anxiousness pooling in her stomach. It was just a name, yet it was capable of making all the unpleasant memories resurface.

“Minjeong.” Jimin echoed. There was a certain adorableness in the lilt of her tone, enough to drown whatever unpleasant memories from raiding Winter’s thoughts. Her eyes were starry. “Minjeong, Minjeong, Minjeong, Kim Minjeong…”

Winter bit her lip.

That was…cute.

Winter reached for a bottle of water placed on the bedside table, uncapping it before placing it close to Jimin’s lips, her other hand held Jimin’s head upwards to make it easier for the actress to drink. Jimin ended up finishing the content, becoming a giggly mess when Winter put the empty plastic bottle on the bedside table.

Winter tilted her head, musing, “You really need to sleep.”

“I can’t.”

“Indeed, that’s the problem. I know.”

It would take quite a bit of time for the effects to diminish and once it did, Jimin would most definitely feel exhausted. Nonetheless, Jimin was much tamer compared to other horny teenagers she had witnessed so she considered that as a win, since ecstasy was called a party drug for a reason. Though that didn’t mean she didn’t at least plan a murder for whoever made Jimin like this.

“Make me sleep then.”

Winter tried to get off Jimin but Jimin was fast to grab her collar with both hands. Winter had to put one hand against the bed to stop her from falling straight into Jimin.

“Where are you going?!”

“Phone call.”

“Do it here!”

Winter stared at her. Jimin stared back fervently. With a reluctant sigh, she took out her phone from the pocket, searching for a certain contact before pressing the call button.

“I need to clear Karina’s schedule for tomorrow and the day after that. Yeah, she’s sick. I’ll reschedule the plans on another date and inform you about the details.” She tossed the phone across the bed, raising an eyebrow. “Satisfied now?”

“A bit.”

“Just a bit?” Winter couldn’t help but let out a laugh. Her cold exterior melted away the more she spent her time with this version of Jimin. Her voice sounded softer, more amiable. “What do you want to do now?”

“Minjeongie can we cuddle?”

Winter gulped, not expecting Jimin to call her like that. Her heart stuttered against her chest.

“What happens if I say no?”

“I’ll…I’ll cry.”

Winter’s chest swelled with warmth. No one could resist those adorably pleading eyes.

“We can’t let that happen, can we?”

That night they both lied on the bed, wide awake staring at the ceiling as they talked and talked and talked. Jimin did the most of the talking despite her slightly slurry tone and sometimes incoherent words. She told about the memories she remembered, when she fell off a bike and broke her nose, when the first ice cream she bought somehow ended up in the drain, when she first met Aeri during university days. 

Winter learned a lot about Jimin more than she could in any other days.

Jimin was scared of birds. She hated summer because of the sweats. She preferred her drinks cold rather than hot. She loved dinosaurs and cats and cute little things. She feared the dark and would never sleep with the lights off.

“Jimin-ssi.”

“Yeah Minjeongie?” Jimin drawled, her fingers absentmindedly buttoning and unbuttoning Winter’s shirt as she was comfortably nestled under the latter’s chin. Her contentment was so obvious because this was the first time in a while that she finally didn’t move too much, a stark contrast to how fidgety and jittery she was before.

Winter was definitely not the one who proposed to be in this position. It was all Jimin’s doing. But Winter could not refuse, could she? It was partly her fault Jimin ended up getting drugged and it was her responsibility to take care of Jimin, whatever it took— even if it meant complying with whatever shenanigans the actress was up to despite how her left rib was aching.

“Back then when we were sleeping together, why didn’t you say you hated the dark? And right now too.”

Indeed, Winter had turned off all the lights before she was being used as a human pillow by Jimin and never did once the actress ever voiced out her fear of the dark. 

The fingers fiddling with the button stopped. Then a soft hum.

“You were there with me back then. And you’re here with me right now.” Then a brief pause. Jimin’s voice tinged with a slight hint of vulnerability. “You’re always with me no matter what happens. I feel safe with you.”

The truth was far from that, unfortunately.

The fact that Jimin was drugged because of Winter somehow made her heart twisted with guilt. She drew in a long breath, feeling bile rising in her throat. She was starting to regret her decision on accepting Aeri’s offer, knowing well the shadows of the past were trailing after her, devouring her own cold traces like an insatiable predator hunting its prey.

“I’m sorry.”

Jimin perked up, raising her head to face Winter. Winter squinted her eyes, couldn’t really see Jimin in the dark except for her silhouette. From here she couldn’t distinguish Jimin’s expression, much less knowing what the latter was up to.

The silence stretched.

Then another shift. A hand holding her nape. Jimin moved closer. Winter’s heartbeat spiked, beating harshly against her ribcage the moment she felt a careless press of soft lips right on her left cheek, closer to her eye.

Suddenly everything felt warm.

Before she knew it, a silent laugh left her lips.

Yeah, Jimin’s definitely intoxicated.

However her next words did nothing but melt Winter like a puddle of goo. A shaky exhale left her lips upon noticing the clear genuineness in Jimin’s tone.

“You have nothing to be sorry about.”

You're gonna be the death of me, seriously…

Chapter Text

A click.

A figure could be seen stepping out of the door. Black windbreaker, black cap and shorts. A mask covering her face, enough for the identity to be unknown. The sun had cast its rays to the world, painting the skies in myriads of orange and pink hues as it rose. The birds had woken up, cutting through the cold air and clouds with powerful strokes of their wings. 

The day was just getting started.

The road was slowly being filled with vehicles and streets were full with people, heading towards their own respective destination. And yet, standing near the ledge, a dark brown-haired woman was still, unmoving amidst the exuberance of life. The woman only glanced to the side upon noticing another presence accompanying her on the rooftop.

“Have you eaten yet?”

The woman watched as the latter took off the mask. The cap was removed. A hand ran through auburn locks. Hazel eyes met with grey ones.

The dark brown haired woman shook her head. Her hands mid-air as she swiftly signalled. Hazel’s eyes were focused on the series of movements.

“It’s still too early. Why do you want to meet me here?”

“I think…” Winter licked her lips, hesitation was clear in her gaze. “I think someone is after me. I have yet to know their intentions but it’s clear that they’re targeting me.”

The woman stared at Winter for quite awhile, grey eyes staring right at her as if searching for any kind of deception. Lies would be something she desired to be indulged rather than having to face the fact that Winter was being truthful.

After a moment of silence that seemed to be suffocating them to no ends, the woman signalled again. A bit more forceful and intimidating.

“Don’t lie.”

“I wouldn’t dare, Yizhuo.” Winter’s lips stretched into a wistful smile. Sadness was clear in her gaze. “Not at you, at least.”

“Why?”

Winter drew in a long breath. Hazel eyes trailed across the streets beneath, not really looking anywhere in particular. Last night’s incident was still fresh in her mind. Certains words etched like a parasite, playing like a broken record which left her a restless mess.

“It’s a gift from the Boss.”

A gift that came in the form of a delirious Jimin that Winter had to entertain her for hours before the effect subsided. She was lucky Jimin didn’t seem to be drugged that much but still, the fact that Jimin’s rest time was cut off into none somehow managed to disturb her other schedules. Winter was not dumb to not know the reason they targeted Jimin because they wanted to harm whoever was close to Winter. This was considered minimal, merely as a gentle warning to let Winter know that she had to anticipate more because from now on, things would slowly go worse.

It was a curse.

That was how it had always been. And presumably that was how it would always be.

“They wanted me.” Winter dropped her head, staring at her black and grey running shoes. “And I have someone to protect. I couldn’t afford putting her in danger just because of me.”

A silent laugh. Yizhuo’s teeth were on full display. But those eyes. They were brimmed with sadness and nothing in the world could ever hide that pain. It was unspoken between them, a silent yet sheer acknowledgement that Winter would have to dip her hands in blood again after all these years. It was inevitable.

“Take care of her well.” Winter noticed Yizhuo’s fingers were slightly trembling. And it was surely not from the cold. “Take care of yourself too.”

A nod.

“I will. That’s my promise.”

***

“Where did you go?”

Minjeong halted her steps. That question made her rethink her life existence in such a brief moment because she swore it sounded like she was going to be scolded for sneaking out of the house, although the truth was less likely to be that.

Jimin was lounging on the couch, her back was facing Minjeong so it was a bit hard for Minjeong to find out what she was thinking. She wiped off the beads of sweats on her forehead, zipping open the windbreaker to cool off her body temperature. The compression shirt felt warmer now that she had stopped running. She really should wash up.

“Working out.”

Her response seemed to gain Jimin’s interest when the actress literally twisted her head to face her. Minjeong was halfway taking off her windbreaker when she heard a scandalised gasp. Hazel’s eyes averted towards the actress, only to find out that Jimin’s jaw was hung low and her gaze was…on her body—

Minjeong instantly wrapped the windbreaker around her body. Despite the indifference gaze she sported on, her face betrayed her by flushing crimson.

“ Jimin-ssi .” Onyx eyes went up to meet with hazel ones. Minjeong tried not to be affected by the fact that her assumption was proven to be true; Jimin was indeed staring at her body. “You’re staring.”

“Maybe I am.”

The statement baffled Minjeong more. Did the ecstasy damage the neurons in her brain already?

“P-Pardon me?”

Jimin blinked, as if she had just experienced some kind of revelation from her ancestors. Her big wide eyes were looking straight at Minjeong. Her next words didn’t help either. Minjeong could only stand there like a dumb bear.

“You look hot.”

That sentence alone was enough to glitch Winter’s mind, even more so upon hearing the pure genuineness in Jimin’s tone. Her heart felt like it had ripped out of the rib cage due to how hard it was pounding.

A huff left Minjeong’s lips, her cheeks puffed up. She went to the kitchen to grab a bottle of water before taking a seat at the armrest of the couch. With a flick of a wrist, the cap was opened and she gulped down a hefty amount before turning to Jimin who had been watching intently since then. Minjeong let her gaze wander, noting the messy hair, barely sobered expression and the tiredness clung onto her eyelids.

She extended the bottle towards Jimin, receiving a shake of a head in response. She nodded.

“Are you feeling okay?”

“I couldn’t sleep.” Jimin’s eyebrows furrowed, as if she was trying to figure out something but somehow she couldn’t. “I feel tired though I’m sure I didn’t do much yesterday. And…it’s just —”

Jimin pursed her lips, taking a moment before continuing, “I feel…sad?”

All of them were the side effects of ecstasy.

The corner of Minjeong’s lips curled up. She capped the bottle and placed it on the coffee table before going back to her spot, one hand placed on the armrest, supporting her weight.

“It’s okay to feel sad sometimes.” There was undeniable warmth in Minjeong’s tone, as well as in her gaze but she didn’t bother to go back to her cold facade. It was over now that Jimin had known her true name and the person right in front of Jimin was no longer Winter, it was Minjeong. The Kim Minjeong that she had tried to hide beneath the face of Winter. “Though I thought you were sleeping well when I slipped out of your bed hours ago. I never knew my absence affects you that much.”

“You were in my bed?” The gears in the actress’s head seemed to move a bit slow today and even if she was surprised, her expression didn’t show much. Instead, confusion was clear in her gaze. “So the shirt on the floor was yours?”

That sounded scarily scandalous when those words left Jimin’s lips.

Minjeong vividly remembered Jimin claiming that she was hot and somehow ended up tearing open Minjeong’s shirt, its buttons literally shot across the room before it was being thrown somewhere on the floor. Minjeong had accepted her fate then, wrapping herself with the blanket with the inebriated Jimin passed out on top of her, her one hand literally placed on Minjeong’s face whilst the other gripping tightly on Winter’s hand.

“Yeah, you ripped it off me because you were feeling hot.”

Crimson painted Jimin’s whole face, travelling from her neck up to the tip of her ears. Jimin seemed to be seconds away from combusting but the fact that she sat quietly without even doing anything only amused Minjeong more. Knowing Jimin, the woman was probably trying her best not to scream in terror.

“W-Why did I take yours off if I’m feeling hot?”

A tilt of the head.

“I should be asking you that, princess.”

A frustrated sigh left Jimin’s lips. Her hands covered her face as she tried to self-reflect. Minjeong let her be, casting her gaze to the drama playing on the television instead.

“I think I was possessed by a demon last night…” It was only a mutter but Minjeong heard her as clear as day. “Why can’t I remember anything?”

Minjeong decided that it would be her secret to keep. She got up from the couch, taking off the windbreaker and threw it across her shoulder. She really needed to wash up, she was feeling uncomfortable with the sweats and warmth.

“Your schedule is free today and tomorrow. Take all the rest you need. If you want anything just call me.” Minjeong said before going to her room.

“ Wait !” Minjeong’s steps halted. “M-Minjeongie?” Hesitation was clear in Jimin’s tone. “Is that your name?”

At least she remembered something.

Minjeong’s lips stretched into a full bloomed smile. But since her back was facing Jimin, the latter couldn’t see that.

“It’s Minjeong.” She heaved, feeling lighter now that it had rolled off her tongue easily. It used to bleed then, she was simply grateful it didn’t now. “Kim Minjeong.”

***

Kim Minjeong was a lone child.

She spent her days walking along the hallways and garden, lying down beneath the tree behind the orphanage, running through the field of flowers accompanied by the sunset rays, sometimes getting detention for it and her notebook gifted by one of the caregivers there would always be filled with drawings.

She didn’t bother blending in with other kids nor did they even care to include her in.

It was peaceful. It was lonesome.

Until she was nearing fifteen, when one of the boys from school decided to use her to satiate his crazy tendencies to hurt. The bruises and wounds filled the once clear skin. It should be no problem. Minjeong was quiet, aloof and didn’t have any friends. It should be no problem since no one would notice the hidden bruises, her quietness would be deemed as normal and even if her lone tears glinted beneath the moonlight, no one was there to witness.

(“Why?”

That one question left her lips in a whisper as she leaned against the concrete wall, her frail body appeared small upon being towered by a lanky figure. Amidst her hazy vision she could only make out the littlest glimpse on the name tag the moment he crouched close to her. The smell of cheap cologne made her dizzy and his sickeningly sweet grin shot a nauseated wave down the pit of her stomach.

Ilwoo.

“You look so peaceful, Minjeong .” A hand gripped her hair, snapping her head back. Her name rolled off his tongue easily and she wished to make it all bleed away. She loathed that name. With all of her heart. “I hate to see you look so peaceful, it irritates me.”)

When does one’s suffering end?

It didn’t. 

Despite how desperate her prayers were, despite how damp her pillows were every single night, despite the endless bruises adorning her body, nothing ever changed.

But no one can say about a person’s limits.

Sometimes patience can break, silence can be deadly and sadness can turn into madness. She broke apart a long time ago but the moment he forced the lungs out of her, his large grip on her neck begging her to meet heavens, that was when she finally retaliated. Her conscience just snapped . Her retaliation came in the form of a sharp knife she stole from the kitchen but instead of stabbing him sensely, she opted to slice him in any chance she got. The underside of his jaw, his arm, the side of his torso, his thigh— frankly she had lost count the moment he fell into a sputtering nonsense, splattered blood adorning the dullness of the place.

He could fight her yet he didn’t. Probably the sight of her holding the knife with such soulless gaze made him realise something— if she ended up killing him here and then, it would be one hellish, excruciating death. Fighting back was fruitless. She was the predator this time.

One would think she finished him up with a knife. She didn’t. With small hands that didn’t even tremble for once, she furled them into fists and knocked him out in the cold, leaving more bloodied mess on the ground as his face became more unrecognisable in every punch filled with adrenaline and pent up madness within her.

Her cardigan was dirty with dirt and blood. Her face was the same, except that it was void of any emotion.

“You look peaceful this time.” She had said between her ragged breaths. She couldn’t feel her hands, her heart pounded loudly against her ribcage and exhaustion finally catching up to her. “You can finally stop bugging me, right?”

They both were admitted to the hospital.

Minjeong vaguely remembered how there were a lot of people and most of them said her name in a hushed whisper. Most of them looked at her in fear, one thing that sent an odd feeling in the pit of her stomach. She brushed the feeling off. Amidst that, a tall man in his thirties wearing a suit went to her side, only to utter some words that could change her whole life trajectory.

“I saw you.” A pause. “I saw everything.”

Hazel eyes stared up at him. Emotionless. 

Would he send her to the police? If he was the witness there would be no chance for her to be saved anymore. No matter what happened, she knew luck would never be on her side. She had been abandoned ever since she was young, she doubted this time it could be any different.

However, his next words were unexpected.

“Two choices. Come with me or follow the police so that you’ll be in jail to pay for what you have done.”

It took her less than ten seconds to make such a life changing decision. In the end, she chose him, as suspicious as he sounded.

He wasn’t much of a talker, simply nodded his head from her response and talked to the police. Minjeong didn’t bother to know what he exactly said nor did she have any curiosity to find out. Her life was already ruined, no one would mourn over her but she knew she was just too young to be in jail— especially not when that boy was the one people perceived as a victim when in fact, she had been his assault slave for years now.

She slipped out of her ward, ignoring how people were avoiding her. One of the policemen called for her yet she ignored him. He was about to reach for her but the odd man from earlier managed to stop him.

It felt empty as she walked mindlessly across the hallway. The doctors and nurses walked past her, some seemed to be rushed while the rest were laidback. It felt empty when her gaze fell to the nearest wards, noting some patients had a family member to accompany them. It felt empty upon the acknowledgement that she had always been alone.

Her steps only halted upon witnessing an old man slapped the daylights out of a teenage girl, her body staggered to the side from the impact. Hazel eyes watched. The girl was in an even worse condition than Minjeong. Messy hair, torn uniform, bruises and cuts around her body and marks around her neck which had Minjeong subconsciously went up to touch her own nape, feeling the stinging pain of being choked prior.

Life was downright unfair. That was what came to her mind then.

It was rather a mindless decision for Minjeong to come to the girl after that old man left her. Her steps were quiet as she neared her. It was more like impulsive thoughts when she took off her slightly dirty cardigan and wrapped around the girl’s petite figure. The girl’s vulnerability was exposed for the world to witness and Minjeong knew how humiliated that would feel. She just wanted to at least cover up the best she could.

Lifeless onyx eyes met hers and for once, Minjeong found her own reflection in the girl’s gaze. Her chest hurts in an unexplainable way but she wasn’t given time to properly address it when she noticed a pair of married couples going in their direction. As if invisible, they went to the girl’s side without glancing at Minjeong even once, concern spilled in each and every movement which Minjeong assumed they were probably the girl’s parents.

At least the girl wasn't alone. Minjeong supposed that was good enough.

Minjeong’s life however, changed ever since that day.

Minjeong could never expect that she would be training to be an agent, under the supervision of the man who saved her (which she learned later that his name was Lee Hyunjae). She was supposed to be part of an elite unit, operating in the shadows like a ghost, and carrying out her missions without being detected by anyone else. It was ridiculous, downright ridiculous how everything turned out. But she wasn’t the one to complain.

Not when her training felt like she was being tortured straight from hell. She could barely have any time to think, much less to complain. Hyunjae was strict and harsh, barely sympathised. She hated that about him. But then again, she couldn’t . Her records stood out more than the rest since he had been pushing to her limits. It was something she was secretly grateful for (even if she didn’t want to admit it).

Most agents that trained along with her were wary of her.

Winter Kim, that was her new name.

She buried Kim Minjeong ages ago along with the memories of her lonesome childhood days. She just prayed they would never be given the chance to resurface again.

(“Back then.” Hazel eyes glanced up to meet the stoic ones. “Why did you save me from the police?”

His slender fingers fixed the sleeve of the bespoke suit. Hazel eyes traced the movement. Hyunjae’s gaze was indifferent, barely even swayed by the suddenness of the question.

“You’re a victim.”

A lie.

“Even if I was, he’s almost dead because of me.” Winter’s stance was unmoving beneath those eyes. It was cold: his demeanour, his gaze. But Winter had been far too used to the coldness that it barely sent her faltering. “It wasn’t enough of a reason to take me in.”

Thin lips curled slightly yet it vanished just as fast.

“Very well.” He paused. “You have enough guts to hurt him yet enough self control to not let him die. It was the perfect amount to scare him shitless and let him have a taste of hell.”

Hyunjae loved it. The sadistic provocation, the fear gripling one’s bones, the desperation in one’s eyes. Winter showed Hyunjae just enough of what he wanted to see.

Winter could say Hyunjae was a maniac. But then again, there was no doubt, she was one too.)

Agent Winter Kim, a standout among the ranks of elite operatives. Her unmatched skills and exceptional records earned her a reputation among other agents. Her cold-blooded way of finishing up a target, the zero hesitation nor mercy, either by emotionless gaze or by manic behaviour, there’s no in between. But one thing stood out the most. She had never failed in executing her mission. Hyunjae had trained her to never miss a target and thanks to him, her aim was flawless, not a single shot missed its intended target.

So imagine the whole agency’s surprise when agent Winter Kim had made a blunder during the mission. The whole place was an uproar thanks to her.

Minjeong was told that emotions were a weakness. Sympathy was pathetic and she should never give any mercy. But then again, even an emotionless human like her couldn’t stand the agony scream of a woman being tortured, like relentless assault that shattered her stoic facade and self-composure. Her wrath shot up to the roof the moment her eyes fell to the woman with her top ripped ruthlessly, being held hostage by her target.

It was pathetic enough to witness the woman pleading to that hideous, sickening monster and a shot of nauseated wave pooling in Winter’s stomach. Disgust and resentment threaten to crawl up, eating away her self control. His hands grabbing the hostage still, her gut-wrenching pleads, his sickening demon laugh—

Something snapped within her that day and all she could see was red.

(“Stay in the shadows, agent.” The voice rang from her earpiece, sounding more desperate as the tone increased higher and higher. It was almost deafening. The line crackled a bit due to the high frequency. “ Stay in the shadows Kim Winter! ”)

The deadly warning voice in the earpiece drowned out into a single line, the surroundings vanished into nothingness and she let her own emotions overpowered her sanity, going out from her hiding just to run straight to the lion’s den.

Red. Red. Red. 

Blood. Blood. Blood.

She took down at least thirty men all by herself to the point she couldn’t care less the blood on her hands were hers or them. Her ribs were broken, her shoulder was dislocated and she was limping. The whole sight itself was like a downfall of an empire, leaving remnants of ruins and chaos as the result of her unleashed wrath. It was then that she realised the weight of her actions when her target mercilessly slitted the woman’s throat, leaving her gasping for her last breath before trying to escape.

“Keep the target alive.” Were what she was told to. But at this moment, she could care less.

She was ruthless when she killed.

It was just one shot on his left eye and he was dead.

End. 

For a moment, the whole place was silent, an aftermath of her unrestrained rage. The target’s death was as anticlimactic as it could be. And it felt empty, as if someone had carved out everything within her, leaving her exceptionally hollow.

She couldn’t help the tremor in her fingers, the tears stung her eyelids and the lump in her throat upon witnessing the way the woman still tried to reach for Minjeong amidst the demise crawling up to her. Minjeong rushed towards her despite the sea of lifeless bodies within them. The woman’s blood stained Minjeong’s clothes and hands. For the first time in her life, she was scared and clueless. 

Winter Kim, who had always been one step ahead of everyone in everything, found herself not knowing what to do.

At the back of her head, a voice rang.

Everyone dies in your hands.

She was stripped of her position, threw away like trash. It was ironic how people used to look at her with respect yet it was all gone in a blink of an eye. Even Hyunjae didn’t once bat an eye— which hurts more considering how she had worked hard all the years just to live up to his high expectations yet everything came crashing down into broken pieces.

After all, she had just killed an important target. The one that was supposed to be alive yet she effortlessly ruined everything.

(“You were supposed to bring the target alive.”

Winter’s voice was definite as she replied, “I couldn’t bear to see her suffer.”

“You made a decision by your own emotions. You ruined the whole ambush. Everyone is in danger because of your careless mistake.” A sigh. “You’re a failure.”

A failure . That word stung more once it reached her ears.)

She had hit rock bottom yet again, except this time no one was there to catch her.

That day, she had carried the blood of the fallen in her hands like a burden of the world, marked as a sheer reminder of the repercussions of her actions. She had carried the grief like the chains bound on her limbs, dragging her right to the bottom and she kept one sentence penetrated deep in her heart for as long as she’s breathing.

Everyone dies in your hands.

Everyone dies in your hands.

Chapter Text

It was on a random Saturday when Minjeong broke apart.

The clock struck three in the morning. The air was still and the surroundings were quiet. She didn’t know what triggered it to happen. Was it because of the sleepless nights? Was it due to the hectic schedule? Was it because of the exhaustion of constantly having to be on her toes? Was it because of the fear of the past repeating itself?

Fear, she supposed, was like endless raging waves raiding her mercilessly.

The memories seemed to be rushing in, drowning her deep into the deafening abyss of turmoil. It was easy back then. She had no one she cherished. People around her were momentarily, like a passing blur of background characters in the midst of a fleeting dream. She hurted alone, she cried alone, she tended the wounds alone. 

All of her life she lived to survive alone.

But having a person to protect, it felt foreign. There was this fear lurking beneath the shadows; a lot of what ifs. What if she witnessed Jimin’s death right in front of her eyes? What if she failed? What if she put Jimin in danger? What if the last thing Jimin ever saw before her demise was Minjeong?

Minjeong could never live her life if she was the one to witness the life being ripped out of Jimin’s body. That thought alone brought a sense of dread settling in her stomach—horrendously nauseating .

Minjeong had never once grief.

Maybe that was why all the emotions came piling up one by one throughout the years of her growing up and maybe her brain and body collectively decided to collapse, unleashing everything all at once because the stoicism she put up to protect herself somehow disintegrate, leaving nothing but the empty, aimless Minjeong whose existence people find it easy to abandon.

Maybe that was what she was. Expendable.

“Why are you here?”

Hazel eyes fluttered open. Dark ceiling greeted her line of sight. Her breath felt warm as it left her lips and her voice was just a tad deeper, a natural huskiness due to the lateness of night and exhaustion of the mind.

“I should be sleeping, that’s what you wanna say, right?”

It was quiet for a moment before she caught a small and breathy, “Yeah.”

She was aware of the fact that Jimin knew that she was insomniac. Sometimes she could sleep, though the sleep was never that long nor restful. But the other times she would find herself awake, counting the time that seemed to bleed endlessly until the streaks of dawn came greeting her. Jimin was just a bystander, noticing how Minjeong was already well dressed early in the morning and how the breakfast was well-prepared on the table.

(But Minjeong was often oblivious of the concerned look thrown by certain onyx eyes.)

“Don’t mind me. I can’t sleep.”

“You…you don’t want to buy sleep medicines or something?”

“It’s useless.” Then a pause. “But thank you for your concern.”

There was a slight sound. Jimin’s socks clad feet padded across the floor. Minjeong didn’t look just yet, eyes bored into the ceilings. Her arms were splayed to the sides, right palm had apparent red marks caused by her nails digging deep against the skin.

“Minjeong.” The corner of Minjeong’s lips slightly twitch, not really getting used to hearing her own name despite Jimin using it quite a hefty amount of times when they were alone. “Aren’t you cold?”

“No.”

It was a lie.

The weather was getting colder and she was well aware of that, yet she didn’t turn on the heater and simply clad in a black crop top and shorts. Despite the shiver clung to her bones and coldness grazing her exposed skin, she stayed rooted in her spot.

A sniff brought her back to reality. She finally raised her head, meeting onyx eyes that were already red from the pooling tears. Jimin wordlessly took off her light blue cardigan, leaving her with a short-sleeved white shirt and sweatpants, as she gently slipped Minjeong’s arms into the sleeves and draped it across her shoulders. Minjeong just let her. Black opium filling in her lungs and the remnants of Jimin’s warmth could still be felt from the soft cardigan resting around her body.

“Do you need a hug?” Were what Minjeong asked instead, already knowing well what Jimin needed due to her observant nature. 

Due to their circumstance, Minjeong ended up knowing Jimin more than the actress knew herself, even to the littlest habits she did so it wasn’t hard to know that Jimin was trying her best to not cry. And if she was about to cry, the solution was a hug. Jimin loved hugs despite her reluctance on admitting it.

“Don’t you think that you’re being too much?!” The defensive tone Jimin had however, was unexpected. But before Minjeong could say anything, Jimin was quick to add. “Wearing these clothes when you know that it’s cold and then you’re acting like you’re fine when I know you’re not!”

Jimin never raised her voice. This was her first time and having to receive the end of it didn’t sit well with her. Every word being directed towards her felt like a knife piercing through her heart, twisting mercilessly.

She felt hurt by those words alone.

“Don’t be mad.” Were all she managed to say.

“I’m not mad!”

Minjeong went quiet at the sudden outburst. She had her head down, wrapping the cardigan close to her instead. Jimin’s scent had never once failed to calm her senses. It’s stupid. She just felt stupid over this whole thing. Why would she even feel sad and disappointed over the fact that Jimin was mad at her?

“Don’t be mad.” She repeated, like a lost child. Her voice was small and broken.

It was quiet soon after those words left her lips. She hated how easily her thoughts jumbled up into a distorted mess. It felt like she had messed up a big time and frustratingly, she didn’t even know what she had messed up. The negative feelings were swirling in and out, filling every inch of her body in despair, frustration and guilt.

“I’m not mad.” Jimin’s voice sounded closer, the pad of her feet coming closer until she was right in front of Winter. Her tone was calmer, gentler. “I’m worried.”

Jimin’s hands were cold as they made contact with her jaw. Winter’s head was tilted up, meeting onyx eyes that were full of concern. Tears pooled in Jimin’s eyes, not yet falling down. Winter wished they never had to fall. Those tears were not worth it, Winter was never worth it. 

"Don't be. I'm not worth your concern." Her words were heavy, a reflection of the turbulent chaos within her mind.

You're a failure.

Everyone dies in your hands. 

That's why people abandoned you. 

"What makes you think you're not worth my concern?" Minjeong blinked away the shadows of the past. Jimin's gaze was warm, gentle and she just looked at Minjeong like she was worth more than any valuable thing in this world. "You're everything I could ever ask for. You’ve been there for me through my lowest. You could have left me just like how others did but you didn’t. You make me feel like I actually deserve to be cared for without any ulterior motives. Everyone treats me well just because they want something from me. But you have always been genuine from the start." 

Minjeong's lips trembled slightly. Tears pricked her eyes, blurring her vision. Still, she stared at Jimin, wishing to find any implication of dishonesty because it was just impossible those words were spoken without any hint of deceits nor wiles. 

"Would you leave me?" She finally cracked, letting vulnerability wash her whole. The tremor in her gaze was palpable, enough to bare herself naked. Her desperation was out for Jimin to witness. "Would you abandon me once you know the truth?" 

There was slight confusion in onyx eyes yet it diminished just as fast. 

"I wouldn’t." 

Jimin's tone was definite, clear. 

That simple sentence was somehow enough for Minjeong to finally break. The ruptured pieces she had tried to hold all this time finally slipped past her wounded fingers, scattered around her feet helplessly. Jimin stepped closer, arms wrapped around her as Minjeong held onto Jimin's shirt tighter, not wanting to let go. Her fallen tears soaked Jimin's shirt as she buried her face into Jimin's stomach, her crying was silent yet still, her body trembled against Jimin. 

Jimin wouldn't leave me. Jimin wouldn't. 

A hand threaded through Minjeong's hair, fingers worked their way to massage her scalp gently. The ministrations seemed to work in calming her down, she felt drowsier in Jimin's embrace the more exhaustion and sleepiness were clinging onto her like leeches. 

“You won’t leave me.” She muttered those words to herself, trying to keep it close to her heart. There was a newfound comfort in the way Jimin held her, as if she wasn’t the one who destroys, as if she wasn’t the one being trained to be a cold-blooded killer. “You won’t leave me.”

Minjeong had grown up broken, with callouses and blood shaping her entire childhood and teenage years that even a little bit of comfort made her desperate to feel for more. It felt selfish at one point, where her inner desires craved for more and more, wondering whether she would end up consuming Jimin whole with her flames of desperation if she didn’t hold back.

Desperation was capable of making one claw for whatever they could, wanting all the bits and pieces. If anything, she didn’t want to be the sole reason Jimin was hurting.

She was as dangerous as she was. It was what terrified her the most, to have the person she cared ended up hurt by her own hands.

***

She had a dream.

Faceless figures which she was certain were both of her parents. Both never once looked back to witness her tears glinting beneath the moonlight, silhouettes vanished behind the phantom of shadows, swallowed by the darkness of the night. Her chest felt hollow, as if they left with a piece of her heart without even intending to return it. Her voice was stuck to her throat, a deep painful lump forming within. Despite the panic clutching her bones, desperation seared into her skin, nothing sort of words escaped her trembled lips.

Left abandoned. She was left abandoned.

The sunlight that filtered through the curtains slipped through the gaps, a sliver of glow gently caressing Minjeong’s face. Hazel eyes fluttered open, roused by the light itself to be able to properly sleep. The light was blinding at first, enough for a frown to make its way to her features. Rubbing the sleepiness off her eyes, it took her a moment to realise she had fallen asleep on the sofa.

Then she noticed, her hand that dangled from the sofa was holding something. She got up from her lying position, eyes trailed over a certain figure curled up on the floor with barely anything to cover her from the cold. Her hand however, was loosely holding onto Minjeong’s one.

A frown rested on her features.

Jimin’s arm would surely be tired in this position. Minjeong gently unfurled Jimin’s fingers, got off the sofa before crouching close to her. She made sure to be as careful as she could, bringing Jimin close to her before carrying the sleeping woman all the way to the bedroom.

Jimin didn’t stir at all.

As dainty fingers pulled the blanket to cover Jimin, her heart ached upon reminding the fact that Jimin didn’t once leave her side, even going as far as sleeping on the floor despite how cold and uncomfortable it was.

It was a wonder.

Minjeong had lived all of her life not knowing who her parents were, spending her days alone from her childhood days until now. It was like she was destined to be abandoned by everyone, a lone child never really deserving to have someone by her side.

But then, Jimin kind of went out of her way to prove Minjeong wrong. It was odd to think about, considering how everyone else kept their distance yet Jimin did anything but withdraw.

Minjeong pressed her lips into a thin line. Hazel eyes slowly traced Jimin’s features, noting the calm breathing and the way Jimin seemed to be in a deep sleep. Her lips were slightly parted, just enough to reveal a hint of her front teeth.

“Would you be terrified if you truly got to know me?” The words left Minjeong’s lips were heavy, like a string of noose wrapping around her neck, tugging her breathless the more she tried to retaliate.

Silence. 

Minjeong extended her hand, fingers carefully brushing away the actress’s fringe before standing upright, planning to leave the room. But then something stopped her. A secure grip on her wrist, a force enough for someone small to stumble but Winter had quite fast reflexes and wasn’t swayed by it.

But still, she was surprised because she thought Jimin was asleep.

Jimin didn’t seem to be fully awake, her frown was visible and from the way she was rubbing the sleepiness away from her eyes, maybe she hadn’t heard Minjeong just now.

“Why am I here?” Jimin’s voice was thick and hoarse, even more so than her usual deep voice.

“You sleepwalked.”

Jimin’s frown went deeper, confusion filled onyx eyes. With her sleepy state, her hair stuck out in all over the direction and the way she appeared so soft and innocent— it was cute. Downright cute. Minjeong felt a smile threatening to break, which she stifled by biting her lower lip.

“I’m kidding.” She spoke with the same indifferent intonation, despite how she felt like laughing at Jimin’s baffled state.

“You’re such a tease really…” Jimin’s grumble could be heard quite clearly amidst the quietness of the morning. “Hey, Minjeong?”

Onyx eyes met hazel ones.

“Are you okay?”

Minjeong found herself tensed at the question.

“Of course, princess. Why wouldn’t I be?”

Jimin’s expression was conflicted, as if she was almost convinced that last night's incident was merely her dream due to Minjeong’s extremely convincing tone. But when Jimin’s gaze landed on the light blue cardigan Minjeong donned, Minjeong knew she couldn’t run away from the confrontation.

“ Minjeong .”

Minjeong subconsciously gulped down the lump in her throat. The fingers holding her wrist tightened.

“I’m here.”

It was odd. 

Jimin’s voice was raw, as if she was displaying her vulnerabilities for Minjeong to witness, a silent plea, a desperate wish for Minjeong to acknowledge that it was okay to shed all pretence and admit that she wasn’t fine. Minjeong felt a lot like a hypocrite, knowing she was the one who held Jimin when the actress crumbled down yet when it was her turn, it felt like she was losing a lot, though she didn’t know what she could actually lose. Was it her pride? The fear of Jimin running away? The insecurities of showing how deep her scars were?

Funny how those simple words could bring tears pooling her eyes and her resolutions to gently crumble. Minjeong subconsciously stepped back but was tugged to the front, closer by Jimin who was still holding her wrist.

“Please don’t push me away.” Jimin’s voice was as fragile as it could ever be, as if it would easily shatter the moment it reached Minjeong’s ears. “ Mhm ?”

“I-I’m just scared.” Those words felt illegal to leave her lips, which was why she felt immensely ashamed of saying it out loud.

A cold-blooded, heartless agent Winter Kim suddenly claiming that she was scared? It was akin to humiliation and disgrace. People were wary of her. People feared her. What would they even react upon knowing that agent Winter was the same person who stood right in front of Jimin, baring her soul out for the other to witness how much of a coward she actually was.

It didn’t help that the remnants of the dream beforehand seemed to eat off all her sanity, filling the crevices with anxiety and deep, dark thoughts.

Her own parents, bound by blood, didn’t hesitate to throw her away. Even Hyunjae who took her in had easily abandoned her like she never meant anything in the first place. How could this be any different? 

How can it ever be different?

Onyx eyes were patient as ever, gently scrutinising Minjeong, watchful for any kinds of crack behind those avoidant hazel eyes. Minjeong knew she was unreadable, no sort of emotions could ever break through the facade. She had mastered an act of indifference throughout the years, moulding and shaping into a person she was because to her, showcasing any kind of emotions could only expose herself for threat as they could take advantage of her.

She preferred to be feared rather than being taken advantage of.

But…she couldn’t just imagine having those onyx eyes stared at her in terror. It only left distasteness at the tip of her tongue, detestation crawling up the base of her throat. She hated to admit it, but Jimin meant so much to her that the thought of the actress hating her devastated her beyond repair.

“You’re not gonna talk about it, are you?”

Would you be disappointed in me for not talking about it?

A moment of silence passed by before Jimin nodded in resignation. That simple gesture made Minjeong feel like she did something wrong. Though she knew it was just her own feelings, she couldn’t help it.

“At least hold me, please?” Jimin’s words came out as a whisper, her pleasing gaze made it hard enough for Minjeong to refuse. “Just a few hours then I’ll let you go.”

Minjeong’s heart clenched, silently wishing Jimin didn’t imply anything beyond those words alone.

Minjeong ended up obliging Jimin's request.

Deep down she knew Jimin noticed how she was the one who needed to be held, not the other way around. And it was proven to be true when she instantly melted into Jimin’s warm embrace, the latter’s arms wrapped around her securely as she shamelessly buried her face into the fabric of Jimin’s shirt. Funny how she was never the one to initiate skinship yet when it came to Jimin everything just felt natural.

Jimin was just perfect. 

Though the actress was tall and lean, her shoulders were slightly broader than Minjeong which made it comfortable for Minjeong to rest her head on it. Her stature was just nice for Minjeong to slot herself against the latter without ever feeling awkward. Jimin was perfect and warm and soft— and Minjeong only felt like crying because Jimin held her tight, her hand gently patted on Minjeong’s back as she swayed their bodies lightly side by side.

She felt like a child again. Small, vulnerable and… safe .

“I’m sorry.”

A small hum was the only response she received. It only made her heart twisted with guilt and hurt.

Hazel eyes fluttered close.

I’m sorry.

Chapter Text

Onyx eyes silently watched as slender fingers gently draped the fabric around the neck. Karina’s gaze trailed from the fingers towards the graceful slope of Minjeong’s neck, noting the subtle bobbing of her throat as she swallowed her saliva before the actress’s gaze locked with hazel eyes from the reflection of the mirror.

Minjeong was donned with a white shirt and grey high-waisted trousers. The whole look was simple but it only made her appear ten times more attractive, if that was even possible.

Karina was sitting at the edge of Minjeong’s bed, one leg crossing on the other. She leaned back slightly, one hand pressing against the mattress for support. She made sure to be mindful since she was wearing a pleated short skirt, not wanting it to be ridden up ungraciously. She matched her skirt with white top and cream cable-knit cardigan with dark brown piping along the edges. Her hair was let loose, styled in graceful waves since she chose to exude a softer, feminine look today.

Karina had finished early which was why she ended up lounging in Minjeong's room instead, waiting patiently for the latter to finish dressing up.

“May I?” Karina’s velvety voice remained respectful, though the determination glint within her eyes betrayed her.

“This?” Minjeong gestured towards her tie in her hands which she received a nod in return. “Okay.”

The fabric slipped off her fingers, rested around her collar as she made her way to Karina. The actress’s pink lips curled into a pleased grin as her hand reached for Minjeong’s collar, just as the latter leaned in closer. The cold material brushed against her fingers and she paused, glancing up to meet the usual emotionless hazel eyes staring back at her.

Despite the lack of emotions, Karina would be definitely blind to not notice the obvious crimson painted the latter’s face down to her nape. Karina’s fingers moved deliberately, slowly twisting and pulling the fabric into a neat knot, wanting to stay in this position as long as she could.

“How much time do we have left until the interview?”

Onyx eyes met hazel ones. Minjeong was fast to avert her gaze.

“One hour.”

“How long does it take to get there?”

“Fifteen.”

“Preparation?”

“Depends. Five if you’re fast enough.”

Karina fixed the collar, making sure Minjeong would be presentable. Minjeong was about to properly stand when Karina held her nape, her cold palm made contact with the flushed skin. There was a genuine surprise dancing within those hazel eyes.

“Karina-ssi.”

Karina raised an eyebrow. 

Minjeong was really good at distinguishing between Karina and Jimin. That woman never addressed her wrongly and it’s amusing at one point.

“Which one do you like more?” Karina opted to ask.

“Pardon me?”

“Which one do you like more?” There was an obvious teasing lilt in her tone, one that somehow made Minjeong appear slightly faltered. It was obvious from the bobbing of her throat and the slightly trembled gaze that Minjeong was nervous. “Jimin or Karina?”

“They’re still the same person at the end of the day.” Despite the nervousness, Minjeong was fast to articulate a response—one that was nothing short of brilliant. “Can’t I like both?”

Minjeong’s soft lips stretched into a small smile. Gentleness oozed from her gaze. Karina’s heart swelled with warmth at the simple gesture.

“That’s actually quite a nice response. Most people prefer Karina though.” Karina took a deep breath. “But that’s not what I wanna ask you actually.”

Minjeong was quiet, silently urging Karina to continue. Nothing sort of emotions broke through her nor did she question Karina for the odd position they ended up in. Minjeong was always good at hiding her emotions and it was infuriating at times. Karina just wanted to help her yet the latter wouldn’t let her in.

It was as if she was terrified.

Some people couldn’t handle the truth. Covering up with lies would be the easiest option. After all, all of us had at least something to hide, something to protect.

But it’s different for Minjeong.

Minjeong didn’t lie. She never did. Her words were nothing but laced with honesty. It’s just that she put her guards up so high and never opened up so easily.

Karina knew something was wrong yet she didn’t tell a soul. After all, no one would even believe or accept her endless hypothesis that was never proven due to the lack of evidence. So she kept in it, swallowing them all up like how she used to do. Being silent, after all, was her forte for she had been burying all her emotions and memories of the painful past a long time ago, not bothering once to look back.

At first Karina assumed that it was a serial assault, with the victims coincidentally ending up to be the same people who had bothered her. The patterns were similar. Beaten up on the face yet no fingerprints nor anything that could lead them to the assailant, except in the second case, the victim was found with a few extra wounds on his forehead, shoulder, rib and the palm of his hand— the exact spots where Karina had gotten hurt back then.

Coincidence? Surely not.

“Be honest with me, can you do that?”

Her fingers around Minjeong’s nape tightened upon noticing that the latter tried to move away. This time however, Karina miscalculated her force which she ended up making Minjeong stumble closer to her. Minjeong had to put her hands on the mattress just so she wouldn’t crash into the actress.

They were close, close enough for Minjeong to be taken off guard and for Karina to get what she wanted to seek.

“I need your answer, Minjeong-ah.”

A clear of the throat, followed by a soft, “In this position?”

Karina’s eyebrow hiked up challengingly.

“You’ve got a problem with that?”

Minjeong didn’t reply, her gaze averted away. Karina’s lips stretched into a pleased smile, her fingers absentmindedly played with Minjeong’s baby hair. Minjeong’s vanilla perfume gently wafted through the air. Onyx eyes shifted. It had been a familiar occurrence to have Winter teasing her. It was relentless. And a change of position did satisfy her a lot, knowing Winter was affected by her too.

“It was you right? The one who saved me at the awards ceremony?” Karina tilted her head, inspecting any little shift in Minjeong’s expression. “It’s either yes or no. As simple as that.”

It took Minjeong a while before her lips parted, an answer rested at the tip of her tongue, “Yes.”

“The one that assaulted me that night, he was admitted to the hospital. Is that also your doing?”

A hesitant, “Yes.”

Karina blinked, not expecting Minjeong to easily comply. She at least expected a slight disobedience. Well, not like she was complaining. It was easier this way.

“ Hm ? Minjeong-ah, you’re quite obedient today.”

“As if.” A scoff. “What am I? A dog?”

A Maltese would surely suit you , Karina wanted to say but decided not to. Minjeong wouldn’t like to be compared to animals and even if she wanted to tease her so badly, now was not the time.

“Would you look at me?” Karina brought one finger and placed it under Minjeong’s chin, urging the latter to look up at her instead of avoiding eye contact. A gentle laughter escaped her lips. “I’m not that ugly you know.”

Hazel eyes finally met onyx ones.

“Why did you save me then?” Her voice came out gentler, softer.

Silence.

A soft sigh left Minjeong’s lips. Minjeong didn’t reply right away.

“You remind me of someone.” There was a certain heaviness lingering in Minjeong’s tone. Hazel eyes looked away, myriads of emotions finally broke through. “It reminds me of the time I met someone that failed to protect herself. She didn’t say anything, probably couldn’t. I didn’t know how severe the situation she’d gone through but seeing her condition, I knew it was bad. It hurts me seeing her gaze, as if she was wishing to have her soul ripped out of her body…and I was ashamed that I couldn’t offer much to comfort her.”

Minjeong’s lips trembled slightly. “And I’m sorry that I couldn’t save you from that guy in the alleyway.”

That was when Karina realised that Minjeong had been carrying the guilt of not being able to save her like a noose on her neck ever since that night, suffocating her mercilessly upon every remembrance. And seeing Minjeong’s gaze alone, Karina wondered how many horrendous situations the woman had witnessed that led her to have sleepless nights and looming regret.

Karina cradled Minjeong’s face, fingers gently cupping her jaw. Minjeong’s skin was warm against her palm. 

“It’s not your fault.”

Minjeong was about to say something. Yet nothing ever came out of her parted lips. Her gaze was unreadable, making it hard for the actress to figure out what the woman was actually thinking. It seemed to be that Minjeong wanted to say a lot of things, there was a slightest crack that could possibly allow Karina to slip in but she knew she had to be patient. 

But then something must have happened. 

She could barely register anything when Winter crashed against her, one hand placed securely around Karina’s head, pulling the actress closer to her chest whilst her other hand wrapped across her back as they fell backwards into the bed. Her hands instinctively wrapped around Minjeong’s torso, bringing them impossibly closer.

“Be still for me, please.” There was an obvious urgency in Minjeong —no, Winter’s tone.

For a fleeting moment, all Jimin could register was her loud heartbeat raging against her chest and the palpable warmth of Winter on top of her. The curtains were drawn, enough for an ample light to seep into the bedroom but Winter’s icy gaze was directed directly out of the window, as if she knew something that Jimin didn’t.

“What happened?”

Winter didn’t reply, simply placing her index finger against her lips. Hazel eyes shifted. Emotionless and cold. Slipping off the bed, Winter pressed her side against the wall as she stepped closer to the window. 

All Jimin could hear was her own raging heartbeat. A lot of questions popped up in her mind. Winter didn’t appear to be any better. The veins on her nape were apparent and her stance was rigid. It took Jimin awhile to finally notice that Winter had a gun in her hand and when she did, a deafening crash could be heard as the window shattered into pieces.

Jimin visibly flinched, fingers gripping onto the sheets.

Onyx eyes stared at the bullet that had penetrated the wall in horror, realising if Winter didn’t push her earlier, she would end up having the bullet pierced through her skull. Unlike the shaken Jimin, Winter didn’t even wait a heartbeat to pass as she deftly pointed the gun out of the window, pressing the trigger. 

A gunshot rang. Jimin’s blood ran cold.

The silence that ensued after the gunshot was extremely unsettling. Winter dropped her hand, the gun was loose on her grip as her shoulders visibly sank. Jimin’s heart was heavy with mixed emotions, realising that this kind of situation literally happened to her. She could only see Winter’s backside from here. Winter appeared so small and fragile, a stark contrast to how she didn’t even falter in firing her shot just now. There was something else Jimin couldn’t pinpoint but it made her feel perturbed nonetheless.

This sight of Winter, it was new and Jimin didn’t know what she could make out of it.

The gun slipped off Winter’s fingers, tumbling down with a sharp clack. Onyx eyes were glued to Winter, as if frozen by the weight of the time itself. 

Then Winter did the unexpected. 

There was a muted thud as Winter’s knuckle collided against the wall in a sharp punch. Jimin couldn’t hide the concern on her face. Winter slowly turned towards her and despite the lack of expression on her face, it was obvious she was seething with rage.

“There was a sniper at the opposite building.” There was barely any emotion laced within Winter’s voice but Jimin noticed the slight tremor that she tried to hide. “And they just did it as a warning. They would have fired earlier if they truly aimed to kill. Damn it, I can’t believe this…”

“ Minjeong-ah. ” There was a slight crack in her voice. Somehow, speaking turned out to be the hardest thing she had ever done at that moment. “T-They were aiming at me, weren’t they?”

Minjeong stilled at the question. There was a slight tremble in Minjeong’s gaze, the withdrawal in the way Minjeong stepped away from her which made Jimin think that something was indeed wrong. Jimin carefully got off the bed and approached her, not wanting to scare off her upon noticing how disconcerted the latter was despite her attempt to feign indifference.

“Minjeong?” She extended a hand. “C’mere, please?”

Minjeong shook her head, her gaze was absent. Jimin tried to ignore the way her heart felt like it was stabbed by a knife at the rejection. It was like Minjeong was in a different world, witnessing something horrifying all by herself. Devastation was clear in her gaze.

“Jimin-ssi.” The tremor in her voice didn’t go unnoticed. Jimin’s heart twisted in pain just by hearing the crystal clear vulnerability in Minjeong’s voice. This was so unlike her and Jimin hated to witness her looking like this, so traumatic and…distant. “T-They aimed at you.”

Hazel eyes locked with onyx ones.

A crack in Minjeong.

“All this time, I never had someone I wished to care b-but now that I have…they want to take it away from me. What should I do?” Rather than talking with Jimin, those words sounded more like she was talking to herself. Minjeong shook her head, as if she refused to acknowledge it. Her breathing was shallow, uneven. The words escaping her lips came quicker, desperation pouring out in every syllable. “What do I do? I don’t want to lose you. You’re all I have— you’re — you’re the only one I have.”

It’s the fear of losing a person you cared about. Jimin knew how deep that fear could grow, like endless vines wrapping your heart until there was nothing left to see. It was even worse knowing how they could be gone anytime soon and you’re just scared to ever witness life fade from their eyes because you know you could do nothing about it.

To acknowledge the fact that Minjeong only had Jimin somehow brought a sense of dread settling over her. How terrifying it was to lose the only person that means a whole world, life would never be the same after that. And to know that Jimin meant that much to Minjeong only made the tears pricking her eyes, threatening to fall. 

Just how bad life was treating Minjeong all this time?

“Hey, hey, look at me. Look at me please ?” Minjeong’s hand was cold and clammy and Jimin only held tighter, interlaced their fingers together as she brought Minjeong close to her. She tilted her head, trying to search for Minjeong’s frantic gaze. “I’m here, I’m not going anywhere. You’re not going to lose me. I’ll always be here.”

“But…but—”

“We’ll find a way, okay? You’re not going to lose me.” Jimin whispered, gently pulling Minjeong to wrap her arms around the latter. Minjeong was stiff against her at first, only returning the hug when Jimin held the back of her head, fingers woven through auburn locks, each movement was nothing but filled with delicacy and affection. 

It hurts her seeing Minjeong like this, looking so distraught and paranoid. She preferred Minjeong to be cold rather than…t his . 

She pressed her head against Minjeong, relishing on her warmth as her eyes fluttered close. That was when she allowed the tears to fall. With a sigh, she repeated, sounding more like she was trying to reassure herself more than anything. “You’re not going to lose me.”

It was at this moment that Jimin realised she knew nothing about Minjeong, despite all the time they’ve spent. Minjeong’s guards were exceptionally high and it kind of hurts Jimin to know that she could never cross past them despite how much she tried.

Kim Minjeong, Jimin supposed, was an enigma.

And Jimin was deeply terrified to acknowledge that there was something far worse beneath the surface.

Chapter Text

The door closed with a click.

Aeri heaved a sigh, sounding like at least half of her lifespan was cut short. One hand fiddled with the watch on her wrist, taking it off and placing it on the vanity table. Then a blazer was taken off her body, leaving her with white dress shirt, a tie and burgundy pencil skirt. She ran a hand through her black tresses, gathering on one side. 

Deep brown eyes locked with grey ones from the reflection of the mirror.

“My dear, you know that feeling when you know something is off but you can’t figure out what?”

Aeri unbuttoned the sleeves as she slowly approached the bed, where a certain dark brown haired woman was sitting comfortably, lower half was covered by the duvet as she leaned against the headboard. Aeri stopped at the woman’s side, lowering her body when the latter extended her hands out to take off her tie.

Aeri’s gaze settled on the woman’s face, tracing her features. From her eyebrows, her doe eyes, the slope of her nose and the gentle curve of her pink lips. Then her gaze rested on the faded scar across her neck. Dark brown eyes averted up, only to find out that the woman was already looking at her. The necktie was already placed on her lap.

“Yizhuo,” she called. “You’re cute tonight.”

From this close, Aeri could clearly see Yizhuo’s wavered gaze and how pink dusted her cheeks, enough to bring a smile to her lips.

“Can you unbutton my shirt? Just two buttons. It suffocates me.”

Yizhuo was surprisingly obedient, her fingers reaching for the buttons when on normal occasions, she would at least retaliate with at least a smack or a punch. Aeri simply watched, wanting to savour the moment as much as she could.

“Kim Winter.” Deep brown eyes watched as Yizhuo froze, the fingers hovered over the shirt. Then a blink, and it was all gone.

Aeri pursed her lips in return. Yizhuo was feigning indifference, that much she knew.

“Does that name ring a bell?” Aeri prodded, her eyes were watchful of any single flicker of emotions in Yizhuo’s gaze.

Yizhuo shook her head, one hand placed on her shoulder to gently push her, indicating that she had done unbuttoning Aeri’s shirt. Aeri stood up straight, fiddling with the collar. The ghost of Yizhuo’s touch could still be felt against her skin and the remnants of hyacinth left unmistakable traces within her, melded with her own rose fragrance.

Still with your acting, I see…

“She’s a charming one, isn’t she?”

Aeri retrieved the tie, unfolding it before gently wrapping it around Yizhuo’s neck, a mischievous smile dancing on her lips.

“Stop with the act, I found out everything, love.”

Despite the hesitance clear in her gaze, Yizhuo finally raised her hands, signing.

“How much do you know?”

“Hm, a lot. Maybe.” Aeri held the necktie with one hand, tugging it as she leaned close to Yizhuo. Her other hand reached for the latter’s neck, thumb brushing across the faded scar. The movement of Yizhuo’s throat was noticeable when she swallowed. “Though I don’t know the full details I just assumed she was the reason you received this scar and lost your ability to speak—”

A smack on her hand. It was clear that Yizhuo was frustrated, the name Winter alone seemed to make her defensive to a greater extent and this was Aeri’s first time seeing her so worked up.

“ Woah , should I be jealous?” A teasing glint visible in her gaze. “Did you cheat on me?”

Yizhuo’s movements were frantic and swift, reflecting the exasperation. Aeri simply watched, not wanting once to miss any gesture. Her smile only grew as she understood every bit of what Yizhuo wanted to say. By the time Yizhuo was finished signalling, Aeri was already laughing uncontrollably, her one hand holding onto Yizhuo’s shoulder as a support.

“Stop acting like a jealous partner; we're not even one in the first place!”

“I’m just kidding, love. Your reaction is hilarious, I should’ve recorded that!”

Even if Aeri earned quite a hefty amount of punches from Yizhuo, it was somehow worth it, especially seeing Yizhuo’s less rigid stance. Aeri knew whatever Yizhuo had gone through with Winter was not pleasant in the slightest. She had stayed with her long enough to know that Yizhuo would have occasional nightmares about it, the flinches whenever her gaze caught a sight of a knife, and her distant behaviour whenever the topic about the scar was brought up.

Aeri remembered that certain night when Yizhuo came to her office appearing so devastated as if she couldn’t find the reason for living her life anymore. Aeri was lucky that Yizhuo came to her instead of ending it for once and for all. She knew Yizhuo was having a hard time coping up, it’s been a few years yet sometimes when things overwhelmed her, she would often fall into a pit of despair, leading her to do something that she often regretted. Aeri had witnessed it once and the several faded lines across her wrist indicated that it was not her first attempt. 

Aeri swore she wouldn’t want that to happen again.

“Sleep well, love.” Aeri patted the lump on the bed. Yizhuo was already buried beneath the duvet, only half of her face peeking out. Her eyelids were half-closed and she looked like she could fall asleep anytime soon. Taking the advantage, Aeri went over to place a chaste kiss on her forehead before slipping out of the room, leaving the lights off as she did so.

As the door clicked closed, Aeri stood there for a moment, letting the event of the day dawn over her. Truthfully, Aeri knew quite a lot. Winter was one of the agents involved in a covert operation. There were not many agents involved, around two or three and they should stay undercover until the backup agents were in their position to raid the enemy activities and catch the target alive.

It was supposed to be effortless considering Winter had never failed her missions and even during the operation she was the fastest to sneak in and blend in with other guards before heading towards the basement where the target was supposed to be. Alas, the one that was held captive at that time was Yizhuo, a kidnapped college student that was about to be the object of the target’s ravenous desires.

Yizhuo wasn’t supposed to be there. She was supposed to be with other captives in the other room but misfortunes seemed to loom over her relentlessly where she was caught in the midst of trying to escape, unbeknownst to the fact that the undercover agents were trying to raid the place.

If only she waited a bit longer, she wouldn’t lose her voice and receive a lifetime worth of trauma. But Aeri knew it was fruitless to dwell on what ifs, knowing one could never be capable of turning back time to prevent that from happening. Aeri could only be grateful that Yizhuo was still alive amidst everything. She didn’t want to imagine her life without Yizhuo, it was just…too painful to think about.

“I wonder when you’ll open up to me…” Those words slipped out her lips in a hushed whisper as her mind drifted to a certain woman sleeping at the other side of the door. 

I’ll just wait to wait until that day comes.

***

Evil lurked at night.

Behind the shadows, within the looming darkness, where the most unhinged and twisted occurrence would occur, considering it was easier to hide, easier to slip away. No one would know. No one would care.

The moon was swallowed by the clouds when the lights dimmed out, leaving a gentle yellow hue filling in the four-walled space. Loud music blared from the speaker. Sitting on the sofa was a man in his late twenties, his cheeks flushed and one hand holding the mic. His appearance was casual and neat, with a light blue polo shirt tucked in a white pants. 

His eyebrows furrowed upon seeing who had just entered the room. The place was shrouded with something else, akin to dread and enigma the moment his hazy gaze landed on a figure clad with a trench coat and a cap, enough to cover their face from being identified. The boots they wore elicited a thudding sound as the figure stepped closer to him.

“Those jerks. I paid them a hefty amount and they gave me this crap.” Annoyance was clear in his tone since he had been expecting a beauty to accompany him through the night, certainly not a freak. “Where is my lady? I have no time for this you piece of shi—”

“Kang Yohan.” Ah, it was a woman’s voice. Yohan’s demeanour shifted. His lips curled into a twisted smile. “Play with me.”

He got up, dropping the mic to the sofa, eliciting a thudding sound echoing on the speakers. He staggered close, his breath reeked of alcohol and his figure easily towered her. His fingers reached for the cap.

“You should have told me sooner, you whore. Take off your ugly jacket before I rip it off myself.”

He threw the cap away. Auburn locks cascaded down and rested on the shoulders, yellow light painting the auburn shade into warm, golden tones. Lifeless gaze glanced up, glimmering murderously beneath the eyesore light. The gears in his brain moved, noticing the familiarity of her features. 

Where had he seen her?

Then it clicked. 

Kim Winter.

But it was far too late.

A hand gripped his throat, forcing the air out of his airways. Driven by sheer panic, he landed a kick to her stomach which she sidestepped to avoid it and went over to kick the back of his knees instead. It was clear he was at a disadvantage considering his current state. It was just a matter of time.

He had read her records well enough to know he stood no chance against her. Despite being capable of carelessly instructing his men just as he wanted them to be, he wasn’t that good in fighting. All this time he simply had his men covering up for him, shielding him from danger because he believed he deserved to be treated this way. It boosted his ego in the most sickening way possible— except that his pride managed to bite him back in the most unconventional situation.

He tried to run away, uncoordinated limbs barely cooperating when he crashed onto the wine bottles and beers on the table. A hand gripped his collar, pulling him back with force. He coughed, feeling the fabric of his collar choking his neck. Just how strong this Winter was? He gripped her hand, attempting to twist it but she was fast to deliver a sharp blow to his face with another hand, enough to send him reeling. He dropped down on the floor, the back of his head hitting the sofa. 

His hand frantically reached for the mic, aiming for her head. She raised a hand and it slammed against her arm instead. She elbowed his jaw, sending him further into the haziness. He didn’t exactly know how but she managed to rip the mic off his grip, slamming it against his temple with all of her force. The movement elicited a high-pitched screech from the speakers, enough to drown out the loud instrumental song playing in the background. His ears went ringing, his whole body practically screamed pain.

His vision blurred out when the mic wire was wrapped around his neck, squeezing the air out of him. His face was red, and it was not just because of the alcohol. She brought his wrists together, handcuffing him. It was enough to keep him in place.

Winter took the fallen glass and placed it on the table. One hand reaching for the opened wine bottle, pouring the content into the glass. She brought the glass and crouched down near him. Slipping a hand into his pocket, she took out a small plastic containing white substance.

A tilt of a head. 

She poured the white substance. Hazel eyes watched as it dissolved into the drink. The glass was placed close to him. Amidst the haziness and pain, his gaze flitted between the glass and her as horror settled in his gut. He was supposed to give the drug to his victim, just how the heck did Winter know about it?

Her voice was cold and grave, “Drink.”

“B-But—”

“ Drink .” 

Pathetically, his trembled hands reached for the glass, drinking it in one go. The empty glass clanked to the floor as he accidentally dropped it, his stomach twisted and turned. He felt like vomiting.

The song stopped, silence took over the room.

“You’ve sent me two guys.” One hand reached for his face, palm meeting his cheek for a slap, just enough to make sure he was focusing on her words. “And a sniper. I came here for you just in case you missed me.”

“I’m sorry…please spare me…”

Hazel eyes watched as his head hung low. He was getting sleepy. Seemed like the effects were slowly taking over his senses. She pressed her lips into a thin line, not an ounce of emotions broke through her features.

“Where’s your boss?”

“I don’t know.”

“Okay.” She took out a knife, noting the way his gaze trembled upon seeing it. Effortlessly, she twirled it and slammed it into his thigh. Her hand stayed there, gripping onto the knife, knuckles turned white. His scream was loud, almost deafening even and he was writhing yet his movement was restricted he couldn’t do much. The room was soundproof and she could care less. “Still won’t tell me?”

“N-No, wait—”

Her other hand took out another knife from the belt sheath and she thrusted it onto his shoulder, earning another agonising scream. She twisted the knife, his scream sounded a lot like he had just seen death. Her lips curled, eyes flickered with amusement upon witnessing his sufferings. Tears spilled down his cheeks, the veins in his neck popped out due to his distressed condition.

Pathetic. 

“He’s at the club downtown!”

“Which club?”

“E-Eclipse.”

A nod.

She pulled out the knives, placing them back into the sheath. There was no blood drawn for they were just retractable prop knives and more than anything, she had fun trolling him into thinking that he was stabbed. His delirious state gave a lot of advantages which she was more than delighted to indulge. Desperate times call for desperate measures. And Winter knew her ways to make someone vulnerable enough for them to be such a desperate moron— take him for instance.

He was sobbing quietly against the dirty tiles by the time she left him. It was almost comical yet she held back her laugh, knowing well he was way too delirious to even function.

Such a drunken fool.

It took her another half an hour to reach the club. Eclipse was loud and full of people by the time she slipped in from the back door. The guards were not that attentive; some had even drunk themselves to the point of barely functioning properly. It made her work a lot easier as she blended in with the crowd, sweaty bodies flushed against her as she navigated her way across the dancefloor.

It was effortless for her to reach the second floor, her movements never once suspicious as she followed through the flow of the atmosphere. Not once did she receive a curious glance for they were all occupied with their desires and a taste of freedom to care.

Then a scream from one of the VIP rooms.

Jo Jeongho, a man around his mid thirties with a well groomed appearance, was writhing in pain across the floor. His slicked back hair was messy, some strands covering his face and his white shirt was tarnished by the wine and crimson that pooled over time, seeping into the fabric. His chest was on display, shirt ripped to expose the long gash from his right shoulder down to his left rib.

The table was once filled with glasses and bottles, now scattered all over the tiles, tainted with liquid and broken shards. Somewhere along the mess, she noticed some things. Ecstasy, ketamine, rohypnol— tch , what a sight. Cowering at the corner of the room was a girl around seventeen years old with her outerwear slightly ripped, pooling on her elbows as her terrified gaze flitted between the man and the unknown woman that barged into the room just now.

Hazel eyes met hers. Cold. Empty. 

The trench coat was taken off, leaving Winter in a white buttoned up shirt and a harness hugging her torso. Footsteps coming closer to the girl before the coat was being draped across her shoulders. Trembled fingers gripping onto the coat given by Winter, and despite the shakiness, her gaze oozed with gratefulness.

“Go.”

Winter waited for the girl to dash out of the room, her gaze never once leaving Jeongho’s figure. One hand twirling the knife, letting the blood splattered everywhere. He didn’t move much apparently, as if acknowledging the fact that he was doomed the moment she found him. However, his gaze was fiery as he stared at her in distaste.

“Why me?” His voice was hoarse and scratchy, his breath uneven as if breathing normally seemed to take a lot of effort now that his chest was exposed with such a bloodied wound. “I was about to have fun with her. You could’ve just…” A heave. “Kill him. He’s just in the room near the exit. I’m just his underboss.”

She stayed quiet.

The fact that Jeongho’s boss was in the other room was something she already knew beforehand. There were five people in total, in that certain room, probably discussing some kind of business stuff except that their discussion had finished a few minutes ago and his boss was no longer there, already heading towards another destination.

But it seemed that Jeongho didn’t know about this little detail.

Winter didn’t bother to chase for the head of the pack, knowing she was lacking a lot if she raided him now. She would meet her demise faster that way, which was why she aimed for his right hand person instead, knowing well losing Jeongho only meant leaving such a large crack that they could never recover. Timing was the key, and Winter wouldn’t lose. Never. 

The VIP rooms were soundproof. Even if one screamed their lungs out, no one would hear, even more so that the loud music from the first floor seemed to drown out everything else. It was mainly the reason why Jeongho preferred to do dirty things here, knowing well no one would care. On normal occasions, there were at least a few men to assist and protect Jeongho but tonight was different. Winter noticed how he had told them to scram off, probably preferring to have as much privacy with his prey.

And that undeniably left Winter at such an apparent advantage.

“Or…did you miscalculate your actions?” There was an undeniable contempt in his tone. Arrogant. Prideful. “I never knew former agent Kim Winter is capable of making such mistakes—”

A flick of a wrist. The knife cut through the air. It sliced across the tip of his right ear and penetrated right into the leather sofa, eliciting a muted thud. He hissed in pain, a string of curse left his lips the moment he felt liquid dripping down his neck, painting the collar of his shirt a ruddy red. She approached him, noting the fear laced beneath his bravado facade.

“You’re just a bait.” Winter took the knife, seeing the way he visibly flinched. The cold tip of the knife was pressed against his cheek. His face went pale. “And maybe a gift for him. I’ll make sure to decorate you nicely.”

The door clicked.

“Sorry, I’m late. What did I miss?”

Winter’s eyes fluttered close, a sigh left her lips as she tried to contain the annoyance. There was something akin to hope swirling in Jeongho’s gaze, as if his knight in shining armour finally arrived for his salvation.

Salvation for demons like him? Winter begged to differ.

“C-Consigliere— argh !” 

A slash, displaying now a large and scarlet X shape across his chest. Winter flicked the knife, removing the drips of blood. Crimson liquid pooled near her boots. Winter turned around, facing a woman around the same height as her, short black hair and playful smile adorned her lips. Her hands were inside the pocket. White slim fit shirt, black vest and matching black pants. 

“Please kill this crazy wench, I beg you!”

“Beg properly then.” Winter replied instead and stomped his thigh, pressing her boots further into his skin. She made sure to put quite a lot of pressure into it. Her gaze not once averted away from the intruder. He hissed in pain, trying his hardest to contain the pain.

“Winter.” Called the woman.

“ Mhm .”

“Be fair.” The smile grew. Despite the tension between them, the woman remained amiable. “I don’t have any weapon with me.”

“No.”

“ Oh , come on—”

Winter didn’t let her finish, lurching forward with calculated moves as she landed a few strikes. It was skillfully avoided each time. The knife sliced through the air, never once hitting the target. They moved with precise fluidity, as if dancing with a long lost nemesis despite the palpable tension crickled in the air. Winter tried to find a crack, a brief moment when the Consigliere was less guarded when she planted a sharp blow across the latter’s rib, sending her tumbling back.

With a huff, the Consigliere charged forward, trying to land a sharp kick across her jaw to which Winter ducked, sliding across the floor. From the corner of her eyes, she noticed Jeongho reaching for the wine bottle. She propelled the nearest glass towards him, letting it crash against his forehead. Then a sharp kick landed on her chest. 

Breathless. 

Winter tightened her grip on the knife before lunging towards the Consigliere. Instead of going straight to the abdomen, she decided to change her aim. The side of the vest, underside of her left arm and the sleeve of her shirt. She aimed just enough to slice open the fabric, exposing the milky white skin beneath.

“ Bro , the clothes are expensive and I bought them with my own money!”

Before Winter could do more, a hand managed to grab her wrist holding the knife. With a twist, Winter was forced to let go of the knife. As it fell, Winter kicked her stomach and reached over to catch it before adjusting her movement, aiming right into the latter’s throat.

The Consigliere recovered fast from the pain and held Winter’s wrist, fingers gripping hard. Nails dug deep into the fabric of Winter’s shirt, enough for her to feel the sting. The tip of the knife was centimetres away from the Consigliere’s throat. 

Winter pushed further. Cold tip grazing the skin of the latter’s throat.

The latter’s lips gently tugged into a smile. Winter’s eyes twitched. Annoyance flashed through her gaze.

Then a slight shuffle from Winter’s behind. Something cut through the air. Winter ducked at the same time as the latter, enough to avoid the upcoming wine bottle that crashed right into the CCTV camera at the corner.

Perfect. 

Winter’s lips curled into a disdainful smile. Her gaze shifted as she stared at Jeongho who was practically trying not to die with those wounds and blood that didn’t once stop from gushing out. Poor little Jeongho, trying to help when in fact he had dug his own grave without him realising. The CCTV crackled and zapped, endless smokes coming out, filling the room with such unpleasant smell.

“Jo Jeongho, you fool .” Despite her monotonous tone, there was a slight spark of delight in her gaze. “Try to act like a hero with you looking like trash.”

A hand reached for hers, cold fingers against her warm ones. Winter loosened her grip on the knife, letting the latter have it instead.

Now that the CCTV was broken, their so-called acting was over.

The Consigliere— Ryujin , had a signature mischievous smile painted on her lips as she easily twirled the knife. Despite having her favourite suit ruined, not once did anger flash across her features as she glanced at Winter’s usual lifeless gaze.

“Want me to finish him?”

“C-Consigliere, what are— but Winter— wait —” Words stumbled out of his lips upon seeing both Winter and Ryujin stepping closer to him instead of trying to unalive each other.

“Yes, Park Jeongho-nim. You have been pranked!” Ryujin spoke with such enthusiasm, as if she was announcing a winner for a lucky draw. “I’m such a good actress right? Maybe I should be one in the future.”

Despair painted his features. His pale lips trembled as he witnessed the betrayal right in front of his two eyes. It was such a tragic sight indeed, having to have his life ended by the hands of a person who was deemed close to him. It was undeniable that Ryujin was the closest one to him—dare he say, like family. But to have his trust broken into irrevocable pieces, the betrayal hurt more than the worst. Despite the loss of blood and vulnerable state, his wrath was apparent.

Winter just knew without those open wounds, his wrath alone was enough for him to break one’s bones.

“Just what do you think you’re doing, Consigliere?” he gritted his teeth. Those words that spat out of his lips sounded so venomous, distasteful. “If my boss know about this you’ll be dead, you bi—”

“Finish him…” Winter drawled, sweet venom filling in her lungs upon the sight of him shaking in anger. “ Consigliere .”

***

Dawn was approaching.

A sigh coming out as a mist. Darkness that used to loom over, swallowing all the light, had slowly dissipated into nothingness as the light of the day replaced it. Winter stepped out of the public restroom clad in a different outfit. No more blood tainted outfit. Instead, she was clad in a black satin shirt with top two buttons undone tucked neatly in matching pants. Her glasses perched on the nose bridge.

The line crackled.

“Gala dinner.” Winter adjusted the earpiece. Ryujin’s voice was hushed, almost unheard. “I’m sure he’s planning something, though his men haven’t received any orders yet.”

Winter had rechecked the information regarding the invitation, knowing well the event was hosted by none other than the famous young billionaire, Choi Ilwoo. He had grown up to be such a successful man, except that he kept his hands dirty behind the closed doors. Drug trafficking and embezzlement were something he did on a daily basis. Winter didn’t doubt he did something worse aside from those crimes but it was hard to gather a lot of information regarding all the activities he’d done. She only got a few. The fact that he still hadn’t got caught because he had full control over the police and important people. Those who refused to cooperate with him would only end up dying.

Winter knew he had been crazily searching for her all these years except that he couldn’t. During the times when she spent her life as an agent, her identity and information were confidential and encrypted which left barely any traces for anyone to take. And ever since she was kicked out of the agency, she was just that good at living her life anonymously, away from the unnecessary publicity.

Except now, of course, considering she had accepted being Karina’s manager. Things got a bit out of hand since then.

(Though she wouldn’t regret her decision on doing so. Meeting Karina was something that changed her life for the better and she wouldn’t trade it for anything else.)

She knew he was planning to ruin her life once he found her again, probably trying to rip her into shreds or humiliate her in the public’s eye. He was vengeful, that much she knew. And across the years, all the suppressed rage and hatred only snowballed until at one point he would not hesitate to go as far as hurting people Winter cared just because he wanted her to suffer.

Winter on the other hand, wanted nothing but to protect Karina.

Ilwoo had decided to mess with her, carelessly using Karina as bait and now he shall reap the consequences. This was no longer the quiet, pliant and small Kim Minjeong he messed with; instead, this was Kim Winter. The cold-blooded killer that ripped the souls without any ounce of mercy nor sympathy in her bones. No hesitations. No pity.

Hazel eyes stared at the empty street in front.

“He did get my point across, didn’t he?”

Winter wondered whether using Jo Jeongho as a bait was a bit lenient to come off as a threat. But to know from Ryujin that the whole organisation was falling apart upon the news of their underboss, the most powerful and trusted man ended up dying in the hands of a former agent who only appeared now after staying low for years…

It was nothing but humiliating.

“He did.” Then a sigh. “But he might do something worse to people around you considering you’ve taken his precious man.”

“His guy isn’t even dead. He needs to relax.”

A snort could be heard.

“Ilwoo’s anger issues are crazy really. I got extra bruises when he slammed me against the table. I was just lucky my alibi is strong enough for him to not suspect me. Thanks to Jeongho for breaking the CCTV in the most perfect time, of course.”

“Is Jeongho going to report you to Ilwoo?”

“He wouldn’t. I had injected him with some kind of anticholinergic drug I stole from…well that’s not the point— and he was already drunk before the incident; I saw him drinking whiskey and tequila before he came into the room. I’m sure he would be experiencing memory gaps once he woke up later on.”

Winter hummed.

“Be on your toes, agent. I wouldn’t be surprised if his men attack you way before the gala.”

“I’m not an agent.”

“You still are…” There was a palpable silence within. But it was easily dissipated once Ryujin added with her signature casualty, “Well, at least to me.”

Ryujin, a former agent that went undercover along with Winter during the failed operation. Though Winter was the only one being kicked out, Ryujin left on her own later on and ended up becoming a consigliere due to her strong relations with her mafia relatives. Ryujin was sketchy. Winter didn’t trust her fully and likewise with Ryujin. It was just that they ended up cooperating with each other just because Ryujin’s boss had undeniable vengeance towards Ilwoo despite their status as partners. Ryujin had been wanting to take Ilwoo down for the longest time, except that she wasn’t that capable of doing so all by herself.

You know what they say, the enemy of my enemy is my friend.

“Agent Winter.”

A hum. The wind blew and her collar slightly moved. Auburn hair gently fluttered.

“Goodluck.”

A sigh.

Winter had a person to protect. Ryujin had a dignity to behold. And this was just the start of their impending doom.

“Likewise, Consigliere .”

Chapter Text

Jimin was just stepping out of the room when her gaze fell onto a familiar figure who had just entered the apartment. Jimin blinked, making sure it was not a figment of her imagination. Her gaze drifted down. Black satin shirt tucked in pants. At the stark contrast of their outfit, Jimin subconsciously reached for her own pink robe, fingers tightening the knot of the sash around her waist. 

She felt undressed in her own home, as odd as it sounded.

Despite this, numerous questions went through her mind. How long has Minjeong been out? Seeing less crease on her shirt, Jimin doubted that Minjeong went out for a long time. If she was out for a long time, her appearance would surely be slightly messy. Yet the shirt was elegantly hugging her torso and her hair was nicely styled. But then again, why would she dress so nicely if she wanted to be out just shortly?

“Where were you?”

Hazel eyes peered from behind the frames, locking onto hers. Jimin unconsciously gulped at the intensity of the latter’s gaze. Minjeong’s lips parted yet no words formed out of them. Jimin’s eyebrows arched. Was she hiding something?

“I was bored.” A palpable pause. “So I went out.”

“Couldn't sleep?”

“Mhm.”

Minjeong didn’t offer much explanation as she headed towards her bedroom, footsteps light and fast. Onyx eyes simply watched as dainty fingers reached for the doorknob, twisting it. The door was pushed open.

“Minjeong.”

Minjeong stopped, turning around to face Jimin. Her eyebrows were raised, a silent question as to why Jimin called her. Jimin went quiet for a moment, realising that she had called Minjeong without having any specific reason to.

“Come with me.” She tried helplessly, not really knowing why she said that.

“Where to?”

Think Jimin, think!

“My room.”

Silence.

Minjeong was obviously considering the offer, her blank gaze penetrated right into Jimin as if she was trying to figure her out. Jimin stayed put, not an ounce of emotions broke through her calm facade. She had always known Minjeong could read her easily but this time she wouldn’t allow it to happen.

“Do you need help with something?”

Upon the question, the gears in Jimin’s brain finally moved. She remembered the abandoned script at the bedside table, the one she had skimmed last night. She could definitely use that as an excuse.

“I need your help with the script. I can’t immerse myself into the character in some of the scenes.”

“Which script?”

“The one where the shooting will start next month.” Jimin pressed her lips into a thin line, taking a sharp inhale before adding, “The script reading is this Wednesday. I just want to prepare myself for it.”

Minjeong’s grip on the doorknob loosened. Despite the lack of emotions dancing within that gaze, Jimin knew Minjeong was hesitating. Curiosity only filled Jimin’s mind, wondering what made the latter seem so hesitant. Ever since the sniper incident happened, Minjeong had been acting oddly. Despite the lack of talking, Minjeong had always been…less rigid and sometimes if she was in the mood, Jimin would be the receiving end of her teasing. But this time, she had been awfully quiet and even more closed off than usual.

It was as if she was drawing away from Jimin.

It took Minjeong a moment before she replied with a small ‘okay’ and Jimin simply let the latter enter her bedroom, not really thinking of what she was going to do with Minjeong and the script. Her bed was a bit messy, the blanket was a crumpled mess, shaping a bundle at the foot of the bed and the sheets were rumpled, clearly indicating that it hadn’t been long since Jimin was woken up.

“Pardon the mess. I just got out of the shower.” Jimin said as she reached for the scrunchie on the bedside table, tying her freshly blow-dried locks into a messy bun. She took a seat at the edge of the bed, glanced at Minjeong and patted the space next to her. “Come sit.”

Minjeong obliged.

Now that they were sitting side by side, Jimin caught a whiff of her vanilla scent. It was strong and fresh which was a bit odd. It was as if she had just applied it right before she came home. Jimin took the script, turning over the certain pages she had in mind before handing it to Minjeong. The latter wordlessly took it, reading the words written on the page.

“You’ll take Jiyoung’s lines. I’ll take Aria ones.”

“What’s this story about?”

“Want me to explain it briefly or…”

“Brief.”

Jimin’s lips curled in return, couldn’t help but feel a bit entertained by Minjeong. She shifted, turning her body to face Minjeong. Her one leg folded on the bed whilst the other was left hanging by the side of the bed. Minjeong followed suit, both of her legs were crossed and she had one hand pressing the space behind her, propping up her weight. Her position caused the shirt to hug her curves, the buttons desperately holding on for dear life.

Jimin gulped, suddenly feeling bothered.

“I love you.”

Hazel eyes snapped towards her. The silence that erupted soon after was deafening. The tense atmosphere suffocated her to no end, especially so when Minjeong’s gaze was fixed solely on her. Unreadable. 

“But I pretend not to.”

“Why?” Minjeong’s voice was soft yet there seemed to be an undercurrent, as if her question held a double meaning. There was this certain heaviness that loomed along with her gaze.

“Cause you’re my enemy. I’m supposed to kill you with my own hands but you don’t know that. Things got a bit complicated and somehow, I managed to fall for you. The director wanted it to be as tragic as possible. ‘A happy ending is overrated,’ he says.”

Hazel eyes drifted down to the script and Jimin felt like she could finally breathe. A moment of silence passed by before Minjeong dropped the script on her lap, her gaze met Jimin again except this time it was no longer emotionless. 

Love. She was in love.

That was when Jimin realised Minjeong had already started. With that, Jimin blinked once and her gaze shifted. It was never hard to be immersed into the character, she had studied her role for the past few days and practising with Minjeong was obviously an excuse. She just hoped the latter wouldn’t take notice of that.

“You said you have something to tell me.” Karina started off, her voice tinged with curiosity. At the same time she was scared upon noticing the slight bravery within that gaze.

It could only mean one thing.

Minjeong’s lips pulled into a sheepish smile, showcasing her perfect set of teeth. It was nothing but adorable, but Karina couldn’t help the distaste stirring within her.

“I love you.” Minjeong’s voice was clear and concise. Honesty filling in every word. “A lot.”

Karina— Jimin frowned. Sure she only skimmed the overall plot line but she knew there was something amiss. Minjeong should be reaching for her face, cradling it gently. But Minjeong didn’t seem to plan on doing so. So without any ounce of hesitation, Jimin reached for the latter’s hand, noting how cold it felt against her fingers before placing it on her jaw. Jimin scooted closer, making sure that Minjeong didn’t have to stretch her body uncomfortably just to reach her. The fabric of Minjeong’s pants slightly brushed against her bare leg, granted since she was only clad in crop top and shorts beneath the robe.

For a brief moment, Minjeong’s gaze shifted into something else. But it was gone as fast as it appeared. Jimin brushed it off, proceeding with her lines.

“Jiyoung-ah.” Karina’s voice trembled slightly, heavy with emotions that threatened to spill. “Would you still love me if I were to hurt you?”

Karina held Minjeong’s shoulders, pushing her until she was lying on the bed sheets. Her movement was bold and intentional yet her mind was a mess, torn between following her heart or her mind. Desperation clung deep to her bones yet she has yet to know whether it was the desperation of not wanting to lose a chance to end his life nor the desperation of wanting him…alive.

Minjeong’s hand gently rested on Karina’s back, as if readying to support her if she was tired. Karina’s next words were a mere whisper but one would surely notice the rawness within her words.

“Would you still love me if my hands were tainted with your blood?”

From here, being utterly vulnerable beneath Karina, Minjeong was supposed to portray bewilderment and uneasiness. She was supposed to push Karina away and spoke her next line, ‘What are you talking about, are you even hearing yourself right now?’ yet she kept quiet. Her gaze was intense, unwavering.

Karina’s lips were parted, about to ask her why she didn’t push her away but was easily silenced by Minjeong.

“Even if your knife would be the one to pierce me right through my heart, my last words would only be your name and how much you mean to me.” The hand on Karina’s back moved, fingers lightly tracing up her clothed skin, reaching her nape. Goosebumps trailed over the touch. This was not on the script. Those fingers moved, absentmindedly playing with the baby hairs. “If this is the only way my prayers will be answered, to die within your embrace, I would gladly accept my fate.”

The silence that hung over the words was excruciatingly heavy. The script was left abandoned by Minjeong’s side. Karina’s lips trembled lightly, her jaw was set. Minjeong’s gaze was earnest, defenceless and it only evoked nothing but poignancy within Karina.

Karina was not dumb to notice this was no longer them revising the lines. This was Minjeong carving her heart out for her to witness. Amidst the indistinctiveness of all, amidst how Karina was left in the dark, amidst how Minjeong never told the whole story— Minjeong was nothing but sincere.

“ Minjeong .”

A blink and it was all gone. The coldness returned. Fingers reached over to brush the fringe away from Karina’s face, her movement slow and deliberate. Karina couldn’t help the sudden spike of her heartbeat, silently wishing Minjeong wouldn’t be able to hear it.

“That was a great line, wasn’t it?”

Karina’s lips parted for a moment before she decided to close them. A small sigh left her lips. Her voice went slightly deeper.

“What’s up with that?”

“Tell the writer to change the dialogues. Mine is better.”

“Don’t you have something else to tell me?”

Minjeong only shook her head. Onyx eyes narrowed. 

“Minjeong-ah. Why are you avoiding me?”

“I’m not.”

“You’re lying.” Karina’s hand moved, reaching for Minjeong’s face. Her index finger and thumb pressed on the latter’s cheeks, squishing them gently. “Don’t lie to my face.”

Minjeong went quiet. Hazel eyes didn’t once averted away. Then without any notice, Minjeong’s fingers went up to pull the scrunchie, letting Karina’s hair cascade down, draping around them in a curtain. She caught a whiff of her own shampoo, the scent that wafted through the air upon the movement. Her eyebrow raised, wondering what thoughts had been running in Minjeong’s head to even do that.

Minjeong buried her fingers into the locks, savouring the strands as they slipped through her dainty fingers. Karina fought hard against the temptation of wanting to close her eyes and leaned further into Minjeong upon the gentle ministrations.

“Being around you makes me forget.” Minjeong’s voice was soft, almost went unheard if it’s not the fact that Karina was close enough to hear her. 

Hazel eyes fluttered close. The hand that was running through Karina’s hair fell, resting at the side of the bed. For the first time in a while, Minjeong seemed peaceful, as if she could finally allow herself to relax. Her breath intake was gentle and steady and for a moment it did look like she was about to fall into a deep sleep just by being in this kind of position. Karina wondered how in the world Minjeong, the same woman who had never once let herself off the hook over the simplest things, the same woman who never allowed herself to make mistakes, the one who did everything her best, somehow found comfort in Karina’s presence, letting go of everything without any care— as if she trusted Karina enough for her to do so.

There were always some exceptions whenever it came to Karina.

Karina didn't yet know whether it was a good thing or not.

(Because hypothetically speaking, if Karina did pierce Minjeong’s heart right here and then, it would be such a tragic twist of fate. A saddened and devastating reality upon realising how easy it was to have Minjeong’s blood taint her hands, how easy Minjeong would let her to do so.)

“Is that a good thing or not?”

“Depends.”

Karina’s eyebrows furrowed. She couldn't handle the vague response.

“Is that why you’re avoiding me? Cause you don’t want a distraction?”

“The term distraction is a bit far-fetched.” A pause. Minjeong’s voice sounded softer, just a little tinge of tiredness. “ Hm , maybe you are a distraction. A beautiful, breathtaking distraction that leaves one wishing for more.”

Jimin pondered. Sometimes the words Minjeong spoke left nothing but question marks. Minjeong spoke in riddles, leaving pieces for Jimin to match, except that she didn’t know which one was which. The gaps were too big for her to discern the whole picture.

Jimin’s gaze settled on Minjeong’s features, tracing the way her eyelashes gently rested on her cheeks, the slope of her nose, her slightly parted pink lips and the slow rise and fall of her chest.

Knowing well she wouldn’t get any answer, she simply heaved a sigh. After all, Minjeong hadn’t been sleeping, she didn’t want to rob that small pleasure of finally being able to rest away from Minjeong. She wasn’t that cruel.

With a careful shift, she lay down beside Minjeong.

She found herself reaching for the latter, finger gently tracing down her features. The slope of her nose, the profile of her cheekbones—Karina stopped at her lips, fingers slightly hovering above. She moved closer, one hand propping herself up. Minjeong’s eyes stayed close. Karina wondered whether she had fallen asleep for real, considering how she didn’t even flinch.

Onyx eyes blinked. An impulsive thought rushing in. It took her less than a second to succumb into the temptation, her face drawn closer, her warm breath lightly caressing Minjeong’s face. Soft pink lips gently pressed into Minjeong’s cheek, featherlight and delicate. It left warmth swelling within the cavity of her heart, spreading throughout her whole face upon the realisation of what she had done.

She waited a moment, her heart beating loudly against her chest, threatening to burst out of her ribcage.

Minjeong didn’t stir. Eyelids still fluttered close.

A sigh left Karina’s lips as she moved, deciding to adjust her position so that she was curled up on Minjeong’s side, one arm slung across the latter’s waist. Vanilla scent filled her senses, enveloping her further into the cocoon of comfort.

Amidst everything, there was a nagging voice inside her head, whispering in a way that left poison within the cavern of her mind, tainting down her beating heart and left her feeling restless.

It felt a lot like Minjeong was slipping away from her fingers, slowly but surely.

***

The training studio was filled with groans and shouts, mainly from the stunt performers. Observing from the sidelines were the director, fight choreographers and acting coaches. Their eyes were glued to a certain raven haired woman fighting with the rest of the men in the middle of the studio. All of them moved with absolute precision and fluidity, enough to make one think that every movement was not planned in the slightest.

With a final roundhouse kick, Karina was the only one left standing amidst the sea of fallen people. Onyx eyes searched for hazel ones, which turned out to be quite effortless, as their gazes locked across the studio. Winter was leaning against the wall, a bit far from the crowd of the industry professionals who were busy discussing with each other soon after Karina finished the action choreography. No one paid attention to Winter, which somehow elicited wonder to Karina because she had always noticed a certain magnetic pull that evoked a sense of curiosity whenever a pair of eyes fell upon her. Unlike Karina whom people would gravitate towards whenever she was in the room, Winter’s presence was quieter, calmer yet charismatic in its own way.

It brought surprise to Karina to find out no one even bat an eye at Winter who was nicely dressed in a tailored shirt tucked in khaki high waisted pants, complemented by classy looking suspenders. Because obviously, Karina couldn’t help but stare .

Their brief intimate moment was cut off by a hand on Karina’s shoulder and that was when she realised that her fight choreographer was talking to her and she hadn’t even been focusing on the words directed towards her. Despite the flushed cheeks, she feigned indifference, hoping no one would realise it was due to embarrassment rather than the tiring stunt she had performed earlier.

It was a bit later when the studio gradually emptied, hushed discussions and occasional laughters echoed to faraway distance. Karina stayed for a bit longer, hand fiddling with the butterfly knife that she found at the props section. The studio manager that was in charge of locking up the place had gone out for a moment, seemingly distraught by the urgent phone call as he went outside for privacy.

With a flick of a wrist, the knife propelled open, its blade glinted dangerously. Despite being a prop, it did its job well in appearing similar to the real one.

“You don’t want to go home yet?” Winter’s voice could be heard behind her followed by gentle footsteps approaching her.

Karina turned around, throwing the knife without any warning. Winter barely flinched and effortlessly caught the knife with her right hand, doing a full twirl with it before snapping it shut. Wordlessly, Winter went to Karina’s side, dropping the knife back to its respective place.

“You seemed experienced.” Karina mused, lips curled in amusement.

“It comes with the job.”

“Fight me.”

Hazel eyes met onyx ones.

“You’re not serious.” Winter deadpanned.

A shrug.

“Try me.”

Karina instantly reached for the nearest weapon she could grab, the switchblade that flicked open once she pressed the button before attempting to strike Winter on her stomach, which the latter easily parried right at Karina’s wrist. Winter twisted her arm, enough to make her grip on the knife loosened. Karina fought back, her free hand aiming to strike her on the rib but Winter was fast to evade.

The next thing happened like a blur. Winter moved with such swift precision that all Karina knew was that she was thrown off over the shoulder and was trapped beneath the latter. Both of her hands were on top of her head, being pinned against the foam mats by Winter’s left hand. She couldn’t slip away, Winter’s grip was strong enough to hold her in place. The knife was thrown somewhere across the room.

Onyx eyes glanced up.

Unlike Karina who was heaving, Winter barely caught a sweat. Her auburn hair gently framing her face and the same emotionless expression sported on her face. Her right suspenders slipped off her shoulder, pathetically rested around her elbow.

A moment of silence passed by.

“You’re an actress.” Winter spoke, her voice clearly laced with authority and absolute certainty. Karina knew it was meant to be a chide. No matter how intense the fight scenes that Karina learned to execute, it could never be the same as the real fight.

In acting, every movement was memorised, ingrained at the back of her head. She knew her previous moves and she remembered her next moves. In real fights, it was hard to even read what her opponent intended, which spot they would want to strike first. Karina would be dumb if she didn’t know that. But if this was the only way of having Winter’s full attention on her, she wouldn’t waste the chance.

“You’re finally looking at me.” Karina replied instead.

There was a hint of confusion flashed in those hazel eyes as Winter asked, “I look at you all the time Karina-ssi.”

“But never this way.”

“What way?”

Red lips stretched into a cunning smile.

“Like you care about me.”

Winter didn’t reply. Nothing sort of emotion crossed her features. Winter was awfully good at pretending and Karina couldn’t figure her out that much but she knew she did at least touch a nerve.

“I do care.”

“I doubt it.” A small laugh left Karina’s lips, carrying a hint of dejection yet her lips curled into a mischievous smile, just enough to fill in the air with lightness. “It’s alright if you personally don’t. Taking care of me is your job but to truly care for me has never been compulsory.”

Her words hung heavy in the air, exceptionally so now that the silence enveloping them seemed to do nothing but suffocate. Winter didn’t say much yet her actions spoke louder than the words could ever do. Her grip on Karina’s wrists loosened and she let her go, standing up to retrieve the abandoned knife before putting it at its supposed place.

Onyx eyes fluttered close.

Karina missed her presence almost immediately. The ghost of her touch remained still and the remnants of her vanilla scent only drove Karina further into empty delusions of wishing that Winter would at least want to prove her wrong. It was such a blatantly dumb hope, and a small part of her hated for even letting herself hope because even if she waited for an explanation, nothing ever came.

Winter kept her silence, just like how she always did.

When Karina opened her eyes, Winter’s hand was already extended out. Despite a smile on Karina’s features, she got up all by herself, ignoring the hand that was offered to help her. The tension grew thicker, filled with unspoken words and unresolved feelings between them.

Very well.

Two could play this game.

“Take me home.” Were all Karina said as she walked away from Winter, not bothering to wait for the latter to come along.

Bury your stupid expectations Jimin. No one would care about you the way you wanted them to be.

Chapter Text

What’s wrong with you?

The message read. 

Karina glanced at the lockscreen swift enough to know that it was from Aeri before focusing on the large display as the marketing executive explained further about the budget for the upcoming drama. The COO’s expression was unreadable and more than anything, no one would notice that her attention was not only at the total costs displayed on the big screen.

As their gaze met across the table, Karina raised an eyebrow. The corner of her ruby lips curled into a smile that vanished in a blink of an eye. Aeri’s eye slightly twitched, a subtle display that she was slowly getting annoyed at Karina’s obvious pretence of being oblivious.

Her phone vibrated. The screen lit up. Onyx eyes glanced down on her lap, discreet enough to not draw attention from others, especially from the owner of a certain hazel eyes that sat right beside her.

Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about.

Then another message. Karina wondered how Aeri managed to type on her phone without looking like she was distracted at all. Aeri even added a comment regarding the expenses and slipped in her ideas from time to time. Though Karina had always known her friend was great at multitasking, seeing it happen right in front of her eyes was quite amusing.

You and Kim Winter.

Onyx eyes met with deep brown ones. Ruby lips gently parted, mouthing some words that she was certain would only get Aeri riled up further.

Not your business.

Karina hid a smile behind a glass as she took a sip of the water, clearly entertained upon witnessing the way Aeri slightly loosened her tie. Knowing that woman, she must have been fighting the urge to not throw something across the room. 

The glass was empty as she placed it back on the table. Hazel eyes noticed. Without much words, dainty fingers reached for the small bottle of water and poured it into the glass. Karina’s expression dropped almost instantly. Her gaze glued to the papers on her hand, mindlessly flipping it.

Another vibration.

I saw that, Yu.

Karina’s jaw clenched, trying her best to not display any kind of emotions. Despite the annoyance, her composure remained calm as she focused her attention to the presentation again.

“Karina, stay .”

Aeri’s voice filled with nothing but authority that even Karina had no choice but relented. The meeting had just been adjourned and most of them had left the room. Winter was like a loyal puppy, didn’t say much and simply was by Karina’s side with her signature emotionless expression sported on her face. Aeri’s gaze flitted between Karina and Winter, her eyes narrowed.

“Winter, wait outside.”

Despite Aeri telling her to go, Winter didn’t budge.

Hazel eyes landed on Karina. Winter was waiting for Karina’s command. Even though Aeri technically held a higher position than both of them, Karina knew Winter wouldn’t budge from her seat if Karina told her to stay. 

Karina didn’t once look at Winter as she spoke, her deep voice sounded grim.

“Go.”

Karina didn’t even glance as Winter slipped out of the room, not really bothering to care. Well, maybe she did care, but her stubbornness got ahead of her. Onyx eyes glued on Aeri’s laid back position in the seat. Calmness exuded off the latter, as if she wasn’t the one being clearly bothered by Karina just now.

“Karina.” A sigh. “Did you both have a fight—”

“No.”

Silence. 

“Is it related to the lack of privacy since she’d been staying in your home—”

“No.”

Burgundy nails drummed against the surface of the table. Karina remained poised and unreadable, not an ounce of emotions present in her gaze.

“You’re not sulking with her… right ?”

Sulking could be the most fitting word to describe what was going on with her and Winter. But even if she was dead and was brought back to life, she would never let Aeri know that. Frankly, a childish part of her simply wanted to have a small revenge because Winter had been so closed off and seemingly wanting to distance away from her. That was why she ended up rejecting any form of assistance or close interaction with Winter, preferring to feign coldness in their relationship.

She placed her hand close to the glass, fingers gently tracing the rim. Her poise remained, not even once faltered away.

“You sound ridiculous, Uchinaga.”

There seemed to be a moment where Aeri was contemplating Karina's words, weighing the possibility of Karina sulking. For all of Aeri’s life, she had never once seen Karina sulk. The chances were unlikely. 

Deep brown eyes settled on her, heavy and burdening. At one point Karina wondered whether Aeri could see past her lies, knowing how unpredictable Aeri’s train of thought could be sometimes.

“You won’t tell me what’s wrong?” It was genuine, to the point Karina almost felt bad for worrying her friend. But there’s just no way she would tell Aeri that she was sulking with Winter, she didn’t want to be teased by the latter.

“Nothing to be worried about, I can assure you.”

Thankfully enough, Aeri didn’t prod for more, which somehow at one point spared Karina’s dignity. God knew how relentless Aeri could be if she ever found out about all these cold interactions with Winter were only because of her childish desires. Part of her was slightly thankful since Aeri also knew she still had to prepare herself for the gala tonight. Her time couldn’t be wasted so easily.

Nevertheless, no one shall know about it.

The ride to the salon was filled with silence. Karina, still with her stubbornness, only stared out of the window all the time. Winter on the other hand was unreadable. Nothing suggested that she noticed, nor did she ever try to. But then again, it wasn’t easy to figure Winter out. There was a possibility Winter could already be aware something was wrong with how Karina was treating her but she stayed quiet, choosing to disregard her (well, if that was proven to be true, Karina would most definitely be livid).

Even as Karina went to get her outfit and makeup done, they barely talked. Winter was swept away with the few staff and bodyguards regarding the flow of the gala dinner and Karina was way too annoyed over the fact that Winter didn’t even strike a conversation.

How dare her…that brat…

“Karina-ssi, you’ve been glaring.” Her makeup artist spoke up one time while applying blush to Karina’s face.

Karina’s brows instantly relaxed, as if she hadn’t spent the previous fifteen minutes glaring at the back of a certain auburn haired woman.

“Oh, sorry. It’s a new habit I’ve developed due to some…unavoidable circumstances.”

It was when they were on their way to the venue for the gala that Winter finally spoke, breaking the tense atmosphere between them. They were both at the backseat since there was already a designated chauffeur to bring them to the venue and Karina sat way too far at the edge of the seat, almost melding along with the door while Winter sat…normally at the other side.

Winter was dressed nicely for tonight. A white shirt beneath the charcoal grey waistcoat, paired with matching high waisted trousers and suit jacket featuring satin lapels. The whole outfit was complemented by a long, black overcoat, finishing her with such a clean and polished look. It was needed to be presentable considering the gala was quite significant and Winter also didn’t come there solely as Karina’s manager, instead she came along as her very own personal bodyguard.

(Though she wouldn’t admit it to anyone, she found it extremely hard to not stare at Winter.)

“Karina-ssi.” 

Karina turned to the side almost instantly, not really believing her ears. She almost thought she was experiencing auditory hallucination but the way those hazel eyes were already staring at her proved her wrong. The car itself lacked the source of light and the passing streetlights only bathed Winter’s lithe figure from time to time, just enough for Karina to notice a certain heaviness within that gaze.

For the event tonight, Karina was clad in a knee-length classic black dress with an off-shoulder neckline, featuring red lace overlays that added a touch of sophistication. A few floral appliqués enhanced the look, providing depth and beautifully contrasting with her milky white skin. A fitted black tailored coat was worn on the outside to ward her off from coldness. 

Hazel eyes slowly drifted down before reaching up, meeting Jimin’s gaze. At the realisation that Winter might have checked her out left her cheeks in flames, but of course she wouldn’t let Winter know she was affected by that gaze alone. It was straight up embarrassing.

“You’re beautiful.” Winter’s voice carried a hint of genuineness and a deep sense of longing, contrasting her usual toneless voice.

“So I’m only beautiful today? Not the days before?”

Winter went quiet, her head was directed to the window outside. Karina couldn’t help the smile forming on her red lips. From here, she noticed the chauffeur was trying his best in holding back his laughter upon hearing her bold statement.

“You’re always beautiful, princess .”

Those words were uttered softly that Karina had to look at Winter to make sure she didn’t hear it wrong. Her heartbeat fastened, pounding harshly against the ribcage yet she feigned indifference, leaning back against the seat and crossed one leg over the other.

“I know.”

It was such a bratty response, Karina knew it. But she couldn’t help it. Winter had been quiet, not even bothering to speak to her all this time yet only open her mouth to say that Karina was beautiful? What a waste, really. She didn’t need that compliment. It was not like she would die without any compliment. A small huff left her lips as she threw her gaze to the front, eyes cold and dark.

“ Haru .” Winter’s voice was steely as she spoke the chauffeur’s name. Karina noticed his gaze met Winter through the reflection of the rearview mirror. It was as if there was an unspoken conversation happening between them before Haru wordlessly nodded and pressed a finger to his ear, which Karina now noticed that he had been wearing an earpiece.

What is she trying to do—

“Karina-ssi.” Winter called as took something out of her coat pocket. A pepper spray and a small black box. She placed the pepper spray in the space between them before opening the small box, only to display a small earpiece in it. “Keep the pepper spray with you always. And wear this earpiece, just in case I need you to go somewhere safe. And if you feel like you’re in danger, just press the earpiece. I’ll come to you as fast as I can.”

Then Winter took off the ring from her finger. It was just like any other normal ring. It had a rose gold colour, with a slightly thicker band yet smooth nonetheless and a clear diamond at its centre.

“C’mere.”

“Don’t wanna.”

Hazel eyes stared blankly at her. Not wanting to lose, onyx eyes stared back. For a moment there was nothing but silence and yet its stiff atmosphere seemed to grapple one’s throat like a tightening noose. However, the whole suffocating air didn’t seem to reach the front seat as the chauffeur didn’t even react to anything, much less glancing at the back like he always did. Instead, he lightly moved his head as if grooving to some kind of music— wait , Karina narrowed her eyes.

“That guy can’t hear us, can he?”

“I asked him for some privacy.”

Karina raised an eyebrow. Taunting. 

“For what exactly?”

Winter went quiet. Right, this woman never tells her anything, it’s infuriating for God’s sake!

Winter pushed herself closer, lessening their distance before taking Karina’s hand in hers. Her vanilla scent wrapped around her gently. Cold fingers gently placed the ring into Karina’s index finger before she took the small box that was pushed closer to Karina’s legs due to her movement just now, taking out the earpiece.

A small part of her wanted to push Winter away but she dumbly tensed the moment Winter carefully brushed her hair to the back to place the earpiece into her right ear. Her brain short-circuited. Winter’s touch was cold against her skin yet the trail it left seemed to burn, enough to send shivers down her spine. 

Winter was close. 

Too close.

“I’m not a baby.” Despite the retaliation that left her lips, her voice didn’t contain any bite, sounding softer than she intended it to be. She internally cursed herself for being so pliant around Winter. “I don’t need you to do this. I can do it all by myself.”

“It’s okay.” Winter replied, her voice soft. “The ring has a stun gun mechanism. Just press the diamond into them. Or punch them. Anything is fine.”

A gentle press into the earpiece and it was activated. Winter took the pepper spray and placed it into Karina’s hand before moving away, taking the empty small box with her. Winter fiddled with her watch, hazel eyes didn’t once averted away from Karina as she spoke, her voice this time was softer, almost a mumble. But Karina heard it as clear as day as the latter’s gentle voice crackled through the earpiece.

“Can you hear me?”

Red lips pressed into a thin line. A rebellious, petty side of her refused to answer but having those eyes focusing on her did nothing but crumble her resolve. Onyx eyes averted away, arms crossed over her chest. The passing trees and buildings did nothing to ease off her raging heart, if anything, they only increased her frustration.

“I suppose you did hear me.”

“Shut up or I’ll throw this earpiece out of the window.”

Silence.

“We’ll talk about this later.”

Karina only huffed. 

You finally want to talk? As if I’ll let you!

***

“There are many people here, I wonder why they even think they could be subtle.” The voice from the earpiece crackled.

Winter paid no mind. She felt the bone cracking beneath her gloved knuckles. The agony scream from the man was muffled by her other hand, non-gloved. She swept his leg. He fell backwards, the back of his head slamming the tiles. Unconscious. 

“Tell me who they aim to take.” Winter’s voice was cold. 

Fingers tightened the glove on her right hand before slipping out of the storage room. She was currently at the second floor and Karina was at the first floor, conversing with a few business people near the buffet area. No suspicious people looming around Karina…yet. Winter wouldn’t let her guard down as easily.

“Bro, I don’t think they’re planning to take anyone.”

“What do you mean?”

“No one’s coming near Karina yet—”

A hand slung across her neck, aggressively yanked her into the nearest room. It was a breakout room. Large hand gripping her hair, trying to slam her into the table. Her hands pressed onto the surface of the table, trying hard to fight against the force. She reached for a pen placed on the breast pocket, striking her assailant on the nape. 

A groan left his lips.

“What is that commotion, agent?”

She gave him a side kick, heavy boots slamming square on his face. Crimson splattered to the wall. His body was thrown off to the side. One hand gripped the back of his head, slamming it against the wall. Just enough to make him unconscious.

“Maybe they’re coming after me.”

Another man entered the room, instantly trying to strike her with a knife. She skillfully avoided, propping her leg so that he tripped over it. His body slammed into the table pathetically. She fought back a snort. Despite being fast, he was surprisingly uncoordinated. 

He got on his feet, swinging the knife right into her face. She ducked, swiftly executed a leg sweep. It sent him tumbling to the floor with an audible gasp, the back of his head slammed right into the tiles. 

Her gloved hand balled into fist.

A strike on his solar plexus and he was rendered unconscious. 

“I never knew Ilwoo was that… direct. ” A sigh. “Come on, I expected at least a bit of thrill. What was he thinking he would get when he hosted this whole thing while trying to catch you? It was hard enough to catch your sly ass when you’re alone.”

“Try to be someone he hates, I’m sure you'll get a lot of thrill.”

“ Winter .” Another voice crackled through the earpiece. A certain deep velvety voice that was ingrained at the back of Winter’s head. Winter perked up. “Where are you?”

She fixed the lapels of her suit jacket, wanting to appear presentable despite the fights she had gone through. One hand pressed the button at her watch.

“Second floor.” She spoke as she twisted the door open, stepping closer to the sleek railing.

From here, she noticed the way Karina subtly searched for her presence soon after she told her where she was. Onyx eyes scanned the room, flitting between a few guests on the second floor. There was a slight furrow in her brow which somehow went deeper soon after their eyes met. It was clear in Karina’s gaze; she was frustrated despite her attempt to stay casual and professional.

“Did you slack off while I’m here bleeding my ears away trying to entertain these old hypocrite geezers?” Her voice was laced with pure annoyance, enough for Winter to think that she had made some kind of grave mistake.

“I wasn’t slacking off—”

Karina’s gaze turned deadly. The next words were uttered in such a fierce tone, enough to send chills down Winter’s spine. The air around them shifted, cold and condescending.

“ Come. Here. ”

“ Agent— ” Ryujin’s voice came through. It crackled a lot more frequently as urgency filled every syllable of her sentence. “Don’t come near Karina.”

Winter’s blood ran cold. With a swift press into the button of her watch, she spoke, this time towards Ryujin. Her gaze remained emotionless as she scanned through Karina’s surroundings, trying to find anything suspicious. Karina was alone at the buffet area, a glass of drink in her hand as her deadly gaze set on Winter. There were a few people close to her, conversing with each other but Winter knew they were nothing but harmless.

“Tell me what’s wrong.”

“Ilwoo has one man to watch over Karina. If you come down he’ll shoot Karina—I accidentally overheard Ilwoo.” Ryujin sounded out of breath, as if she had just finished running miles. Winter fell silent, realising that Ilwoo wanted her to suffer by watching someone she cared about die right before her eyes. How barbaric. “And the problem right now is, he’s personally coming for you.”

Something hard pressed on Winter’s back. She felt it, the looming presence behind her. Heavy cologne irritated her nose. Just a few feet away from Karina, there was a man hiding behind the balustrade. He stepped out of the shadows and intentionally adjusted his blazer so Winter could notice the gun on its strap. He then stepped closer, just enough for him to immaculately place a bullet to an unknowing Karina whose back was facing him.

Winter’s gaze hardened.

Right . Why would he bother to take one when he could have two of them instead?

“Nice to meet you.” Winter didn’t have to turn around to know that Ilwoo had such a sickening grin on his face. His voice was deep and guttural, filled with an ample of satisfaction as he pressed the gun further into her. It protruded right into her spine and damn , it hurts. “My boys aren’t enough to keep you busy, I suppose?”

“Who is that guy, Winter?” Karina’s voice rang through the earpiece.

Winter couldn’t speak. Not yet.

Her primary concern was not the gun being pressed on her back. It was more over the fact that she couldn’t be by Karina’s side to protect her. Knowing Ilwoo, he wouldn’t hesitate to let his man kill Karina just like that. 

And more than anything, Winter couldn’t afford to lose Karina yet.

Her index finger reached for her watch, ever so subtly. She tapped against the watch, the sound barely heard over the crowd beneath and the slow jazz music played in the background. It was a silent rhythm that spoke louder than words. Her hope was solely on Ryujin.

Tap-tap-tap… (K)

Tap…tap… (A)

Tap…tap-tap… (R)

Tap…tap (I)

Tap-tap… (N)

Tap…tap… (A)

It was tense soon after she finished tapping. No response from Ryujin. She bit her lip.

“Who is that pretty girl over there? She seems mad at you.” Ilwoo’s voice sounded closer, his warm breath hitting the side of her cheek. Winter fought the urge to not punch his face at his mock obliviousness. Knowing him, he probably would have known everything about Winter by now.

“ Winter .” Karina’s voice could be heard, except this time there was an underlying concern.

“Copy that, agent. I’ll take care of Karina.” Upon hearing Ryujin’s voice, Winter could finally let out an exhale, relieved. "But one problem, the police refused to come, they claimed that there is still no threat yet. Then again, the director general is one of Ilwoo's puppets so no surprise there." 

“Jealous much?” She finally spoke. There was this obvious lilt in her voice that made her sound annoying. But it was her intention, wanting to bother him as much as she could despite the freaking gun pressed on her. “Am I too pretty that you refuse to move on?”

There was a sigh.

“That’s not exactly a lie either.” Okay, she didn’t expect that. He turned her around, his large hand gripped onto her shoulder. Hazel eyes glanced up. There it was. The animalistic gaze fixated on her, containing nothing but pure tendency of barbarism. She was wrong to even think that he could change. His tone was condescending. “You used to be so lovely. What happened to you now?”

His features were sharper and more mature, no longer containing any hint of youthfulness. His figure was no longer lanky; broad shoulders and well-built muscles that defined his physique, enhanced further by the three-piece suit that encapsulated his form.

He did look dashing. But seeing his face again after years only brought distaste at the tip of her tongue. He was the sole reason for her sufferings back in childhood days after all.

“ You happened.”

A loud bang echoed. Screams followed. Winter glanced fast enough to register the fact that Ryujin was fighting with the man, the gun was thrown across the floor and both of them were trying to reach for it. The buffet area was a mess. Broken tables, scattered food, shards of glass. Karina was nowhere in sight.

Winter took the opportunity to knee Ilwoo on his crotch, easily snatching the gun from his grip. A series of gunshots followed, except this time it was on the second floor. Of course his men were here too. Winter ducked, slipping into the room fast enough to be away from the bullets.

“What happened to being subtle?” Winter muttered over her breath, loud enough for the mic to catch her voice. Her frustration was clear as day. She checked the bullets. Great, more than enough. “And you lost Karina.”

“Sorry, bro.” A distinct crackle. “That guy started it first.”

“Find Karina once you’re done.”

She took a deep breath, bracing herself. She kicked the door open, enough to send whoever on the other side tumbling down. Three armed men, no Ilwoo. She pressed the trigger before they had the chance to react. Every bullet pierce through their shoulder, sending them tumbling down. 

Don’t kill, Winter. Don’t kill.

Winter went to the stairs, hurriedly coming down to the first floor. She heard a whoosh of air from behind. She turned her body away, just enough to avoid the strike. She slammed the magazine of the gun to his jaw, knocking him in an instant. Fighting was easy once you knew which parts to strike, since you didn’t have to waste too much time brawling.

“ Choi Ilwoo !” She called. “Don’t be a coward and come here.”

She turned at the sound of running feet. A body ran through her. She hit the balustrade with a jarring thud. A groan left her lips. This wasn’t Ilwoo. She elbowed his body, one knee ramming into his abdomen a few times. 

This man however, was awfully strong. He easily lifted her and rammed her body into the nearest table. A thundering crash. Despite the pain all over her body, she punched him right on the nose. He groaned, not expecting her to act fast. A swift strike landed below his chin, enough to make him unconscious. 

She threw his limp body away from her, slightly stumbling due to his heavy weight. 

Another three men appeared but she was fast to shoot them on the shoulder, enough to send them whimpering on the floor. They were all so easy to take down, there was barely a thrill. She whistled, grinning. The gun felt heavy in her grip since it’s been long for her to hold one.

“The hospital bills would surely be expensive…”

“Damn you, Kim Minjeong.” Ilwoo’s voice was from behind her. She threw the gun back to him, a playful smile plastered on her face.

The gun slid across the floor, stopping right at his feet. Not everyone had guns. Ilwoo was very specific on whom he allowed to have it. Which was why she was at an absolute advantage when she got the gun. But much to his confusion, she easily gave him back his gun. No retaliation, no desperation.

Winter’s gaze was unreadable, just like those years ago when she was slicing him open mercilessly.

“Have you recovered already?”

His jaw visibly clenched.

“Kill me. That’s what you want, am I wrong?”

“You’re dead wrong.” A huff left his lips. “What makes you think that I want to kill you? You really think I’m that shallow?”

No, of course not. Winter had him under her radar long enough for her to figure him out. His ambitious and crazily persistent attempts to have her in his own hands weren’t driven solely by revenge. She would be stupid for blindly assuming that. Choi Ilwoo was bloodlust, that much she knew. He preferred his victims to writhe and bleed under his hands. He seeked the thrill of witnessing the light of life slowly dimmed out of his victims’ eyes. 

But there was a reason why he kept her close to him back then—enough to make her suffer yet not to the point of her meeting demise. 

It was not because he was young.

There was always a valid reason why he didn’t hesitate to put a bullet into someone’s skull yet he never did so with her.

He loved her—as sick and twisted as it sounded.

And he wanted to watch her suffer, alive and tormented because of him.

Her ears caught the sound of careful footsteps. It seemed to come from all directions. She went quiet, straining her ears to distinguish them. Two— no , there were three people. From her peripheral, she noticed shadows lightly moving. Two from the balustrades on each of her sides. Another set of footsteps happened to come from behind her, yet they were not too close to her…yet.

Were they armed? She has yet to know.

“You are quite shallow, at least to me.” She stepped forward, her boots echoed throughout the ballroom. “What you’re doing right now is gaining quite a lot of attention. It wouldn’t take a long time for the police to come and for the media to do their job. How can you bribe that many people to be on your side?” she placed one hand into the pocket of her trousers, halting her steps. A tilt of her head. “You didn’t think that far, did you?”

There was a heavy thud behind her. She turned around just in time to witness the badly bruised Ryujin on her knees with Ilwoo’s man pressing the knife into her throat. A wave of distaste shot through her stomach, creeping up to her throat upon seeing its blade pricking into the skin, enough to draw out blood. Ryujin herself was a mess. A gunshot wound at the side of her stomach and bruised face. There was a long gash across her thigh, blood soaked through the torn fabric.

The sight itself was enough to keep her distracted.

Enough for Ilwoo to pull the trigger, placing the bullet on her right thigh and shoulder. Her body was slightly thrown forward in return, dropping down on one knee pathetically. The pain seared throughout her whole body to the point she had to bite her lip to hold back from letting out a whimper. His one hand wrapped around her neck whilst his other hand pressed the gun to her temple. The tip felt cold against her skin, sending her brain into a state of oblivion. There was too much to think yet everything jumbled up into a myriad of emotions and thoughts. 

“Why did you give the gun?” He ended his question with a manic laugh, no sort of remorse laced within his tone.

“It wouldn’t be fun if I end you just like that.” Were what she replied instead, her tone remained toneless despite the pain. “So much just for an anticlimactic death.”

Karina was still nowhere to be seen. She wondered whether Karina was also a bloodied mess, being left alone to die because if there was one thing she knew about Ilwoo, he wouldn’t hesitate to kill anyone, except for Winter.

It was pitiful enough to be left on the brink of death, but it was even more tragic to perish alone in the cold, alone and forgotten.

“Of course it wouldn’t be fun. Everything would end if I die.” His whisper was harsh yet there was a hint of amusement laced within. She couldn’t move, not when there were two of his men within the plethora of shadows, watching them attentively and one guy seemingly didn't hesitate one bit to slice open Ryujin’s throat. And she was in Ilwoo’s hold, there’s no way she could easily escape without causing ruckus. Ilwoo's grip on her tightened, drawing the air out of her lungs. “But there’s no way I would be alone. To die with you is my deepest wish, and now I've found a way to make it happen, there's nothing else I could ever ask for. I will drag you along with me into the deepest pit of hell.”

There was a click as he cocked the gun.

Her hand balled into fists, knuckles turned white. His next words shot a surge of disgust within her, profound heaviness crawling up to tear her apart. Anger rushed through her veins, to the point she was trembling in trying her best to contain the wrath.

Choi Ilwoo was a moron, narcissistic psycho.

“Kim Minjeong…” An exhale. “ You’re mine . Forever.”

She gritted her teeth.

A loud bang resounded.

Chapter Text

“She’s mine, you freaking incel. ”

The growl sounded louder in her earpiece yet she wasted no time to be distracted. She pulled out the gun from Ilwoo’s loosened grip, swiftly pressing the trigger. Her precision was unbeatable, despite her using her non-dominant hand and despite them being in the shadows, barely seen from her position. The bullet hit them squarely on their shoulder, its sound echoed throughout the empty place. There was a series of thuds when they fell down to the floor.

She winced as she registered the pain from her movement.

Ryuin also limped down to the floor, her breathing weak and she barely even moved.

Amidst the pain, she turned just in time to witness a heavy breathing Karina staring down at the dying Ilwoo on the floor. A gun was on her grip, hanging loosely on her side. Crimson splattered across the floor as he choked on his own blood. Blood soaked the centre of his torso, where his heart lay, growing in size with each passing seconds. The light of life slowly dissipated from his gaze.

Hazel eyes traced the smooth milky legs that were stained with splatters of blood, the slightly ripped midnight dress around the side of her waist, small cuts across her arms and face. But if anything, Winter found herself wishing to cower somewhere safe upon meeting those pair of onyx eyes.

Karina was staring straight at her with fiery melded within, the flames of wrath that only sparked brighter now that she’s had Winter’s attention. The hand that was holding the gun was raised, the tip pointing straight at Winter without any ounce of hesitation.

Winter subconsciously wavered.

Never in her life could she have imagined facing the tip of a gun, held by the person she cherished the most. 

“ Kim Minjeong .” Her name rolled off Karina’s tongue like a venom shooting through straight to Winter’s heart, tainting it in pure blackness. If possible, this version of Karina frightened her far more than Ilwoo. “I really feel like killing you right here, you moron .”

Winter visibly flinched.

Despite the pain and exhaustion, she mustered up a trembled smile which didn’t last a second when she felt her vision blurry. Guilt washed her over like waves.

I’m sorry .

Before she knew it, darkness consumed her.

***

What was the aftermath of a downfall?

The emptiness would be apparent. Exhaustion would drag you to the bones, the remembrance of what you have done clawing within your mind, torturing you relentlessly. Sometimes Winter would count in her head, how many people she had killed and injured. Although they were ‘bad guys’, it didn’t change the fact that she was no different. She killed and hurt, despite it being inevitable in her line of work, it didn’t change the fact that she was less of a monster.

But things escalated to the worst when someone who was never capable of killing anyone ended up doing so— just to save you .

“You gave the gun to him.” A gravelly male voice spoke. Hazel eyes subconsciously fell on the slender fingers that adjusted the watch. “Is that your way of committing suicide or do you just have that much faith that I would come for you?”

Winter remained silent.

Well, he made sure she didn’t die. That must have counted as something, yes?

Oxford shoes clicked against the tiles. Stoic eyes never once left Winter’s figure that was sitting on the bed, her head rested against the headrest. Winter’s condition didn’t seem that bad but not quite good either. Her lips had slightly lost their colour due to the loss of blood and her movements were incredibly restricted due to the gunshot wounds on her shoulder and thigh. 

She could be seen as pathetic to him considering how she only dressed in a hospital gown while he was as dashing as ever in his signature bespoke suit. But then again, she couldn’t find herself to care.

Hazel eyes stared at him. Emotionless. 

Hyunjae was a bit different. There were slight wrinkles at the corner of his eyes, giving depth into his gaze. Amidst his voluminous, well trimmed hair, a few grey strands were visible. It seemed that age was catching up to him. 

“Did you have a good show?” There was no crack in her stance. Unwavering and confident. A small smile slowly made its way across her lips. It was unhinged in its own way but then again, she had always been good at matching his freaks.

Hyunjae didn’t smile back.

“If you informed me earlier, I would have helped you. You don’t need to go this far.”

“Think again, sir. Why did I decide to do everything alone when I know seeking your help would be the easiest and fastest way to get rid of him?”

His stoic gaze remained unfaltering. Winter stayed rooted in her spot, not even once wavered from the intensity. She knew he was well aware of the reason. After all, he was the one who abandoned her. Why did he expect she would come searching for him? She only informed him regarding this whole thing just because she knew covering up the whole gala dinner incident to the public would be a challenge for someone like her, who had no name or influence to sway the media and public opinion. 

She knew he would comply with her anyways. After all, she had once been his best recruit. The most favoured one out of all.

"You let him shoot you because you needed an alibi, right? You’re trying to frame him, make sure he stays locked up."

Of course he would know about it. Her actions were easy to tell, especially for someone like Hyunjae. Though most people couldn’t see through her facade and actions, he could. It was rather a stupid and dangerous decision, playing with her own fate just because she wanted to make the whole situation her favour. She was confident that Ilwoo wouldn’t kill her as easily but then again, she knew it only stayed as a hypothesis— until he proved it by himself, of course.

Ilwoo could have killed her. She openly gave him that chance.

She was just lucky that he didn’t.

“But you’re bothered ‘cause Karina got in the way.”

Winter’s gaze hardened. He noticed.

“You are bothered.” He repeated, amusement lacing his words. Granted, the prospect of her feeling any emotions was indeed foreign to him. What happened to the stoic Kim Winter? “Her status is at stake, though I doubt that kind of thing ever crossed her mind when she shot that guy. But still, I’m sure you don’t want any headlines regarding the murder of a person done by one of the famous actresses in the industry.”

Of course the media wouldn’t hesitate to manipulate the headlines, tainting Karina’s name further into a defamation, twisting the truth into something far more unrecognisable. In the end, the weight of the world only crashed and burned against her, moulding her to be the villain to the public's eyes.

Winter would hate herself if that ever happened, knowing that Karina had so much to lose just to save someone like her.

“She is deemed a murderer just because she saved me. He stays as a victim just because he’s dying.” She tilted her head. Despite the lack of emotions, every syllable spoken dripped with venom. “What a nice world we’re living in.”

The world was never fair, as much as Winter hated to admit it.

His gaze remained impassive, bored right into her. There was an unspoken tension between them, a silent war on whether he could catch a glimpse of her mind whilst she remained rooted in her position, not even once letting herself break under his overwhelming gaze.

She won’t let herself break, never in front of him.

After a moment of suffocating silence, he finally broke eye contact. His chest lightly dipped as he let out an exhale yet his expression was calm as ever. For a split moment she wondered whether he ever thought that she was a failure for not seeking help, for not solving the problem in a less dangerous way.

But one thing about Hyunjae, she could never read him.

His oxford shoes clicked as he made his way to the door, one hand holding the doorknob. Before he stepped out, he cast a glance towards her.

“That woman already knows about you.”

Hearing those words, Winter's heart plummeted.

The silence that filled the room after his absence was deafening. Fear prickled at the base of her throat, clawing with its incessant venom. Her gaze trembled as she dropped her head down, staring at the pale fingers and white blanket enveloping her lower body.

Jimin was bound to know. It was inevitable.

Jimin must have been livid to realise that Winter had kept her in the shadows, making such dangerous decisions alone. It was Winter’s fault for not asking for help, she knew it too. But she just couldn’t . She’d lived her life in ways that led her to do everything by herself. Even when she found herself in unfavourable and dangerous situations, she couldn’t bring herself to reach out to others. So used to her space that was devoid of comfort, it felt like a sin to drag anyone else into her problems.

One question lingered in her mind.

How much did Jimin know?

“Minjeong.”

Minjeong blinked. Her thoughts dissipated into thin air the moment she registered a familiar husky voice. Jimin stood at the door frame, no longer wearing her blood-stained dress and instead was donned with simple dark green turtleneck black jeans. The cut across her cheek was covered by a bandaid and she appeared more polished and refreshed compared to Minjeong whose appearance was akin to a lone soldier surviving amidst the sea of lifeless bodies.

Minjeong never thought she’d face Jimin this soon.

“How much did you know?” Those words came out strained, almost pathetic in a way that made her wish she would cease to exist. 

The shame and guilt pooling in her stomach, sending a wave of nausea within her. She couldn’t even hold eye contact with Jimin. Everything felt too much to bear as if each burden piled upon her chest, suffocating her to no return.

Jimin didn’t reply.

Minjeong didn’t dare to face her.

Maybe this was it, the moment where Minjeong would have to accept the fact that no one in her life would ever stay. She had to brace herself for the words she loathed to hear, a string of sentences that would break her heart into pieces.

“Minjeong.” Jimin’s voice sounded closer and before Minjeong knew it, she felt a cold palm gently cradling her cheek, tilting her head upwards. Black opium filled her senses, leaving an ache within her heart. Jimin was closer, standing at the side of the bed. Her next words were spoken with utmost sincerity and gentleness that only made Minjeong’s eyes pricked with tears. “Would you look at me please?”

Would running away truly restore everything to how it once was, or would it merely be a fleeting escape from the reality she couldn't face?

Minjeong swallowed back her dignity, the painful what ifs and braced herself to finally meet Jimin’s gaze. Her lips parted, warm breath escaped in a soft exhale before she spoke, every word sounded so dejected as if she could no longer bear the burden of the world.

“I’m sorry I messed everything up.” She was bound to have no one, bound to be alone despite how much she wished otherwise. “You can leave me. I won’t hold you back.”

It was visible, the pain that flickered within those onyx eyes. Minjeong’s heart wrenched upon realising she was the reason behind it.

“You’re scared.” A gentle whisper. “Why?”

Minjeong averted her gaze, too overwhelmed to face Jimin again. The emotions threatened to spill, the words reflecting her fears rested at the tip of her tongue, just moments away from slipping past her lips.

“Everyone leaves.” She heaved a shaky breath. “At first, I didn't know why. I never knew why. But the more I grew up, the more I found myself to be the person people could easily abandon. I don’t even know—” her voice broke. She forced herself to speak nonetheless. “I don’t even know my parents. They abandoned me before I even got the chance to remember their faces.”

Minjeong choked out a sob. Her trembling hand reached for Jimin’s one, pushing it away from cradling her face. She missed the warmth almost immediately and seeing the way Jimin’s frown went a little deeper, indicating that Jimin didn’t like that in one bit.

“Even my own bloodline cuts me off. I shouldn’t expect others to do any different—”

“Minjeong-ah.” A heave. “I didn’t hesitate to kill that guy for you.”

“That’s the point. You shouldn’t be doing that—”

“You are seriously—” A smack on her uninjured shoulder to which earned a slight ‘ow!’ from her. “Stupid,” another smack on her chest. “Annoying,” And a painful flick on her forehead that sounded so loud to the point Minjeong wondered if her skull was broken by those fingers alone. “ Brat !”

Minjeong stared at Jimin in disbelief, slightly offended by the whole thing despite the pain. Her lips parted yet no words came out. In the end, she could only muster a small, “t-that hurts…”

“ I love you , you moron!” Jimin gripped the collar of Minjeong’s robe, shaking her like a can. Minjeong was too stunned to even do anything, her brain went haywire the moment she registered those words. “Is your skull so thick that you can’t even understand the whole thing?!”

The door suddenly opened, revealing Yizhuo who had a baffled expression on her face as she tried to…assess the situation. At the interruption, Jimin’s glare directed towards Yizhuo. Minjeong’s gaze met Yizhuo to which the latter hesitantly signalled.

“Do you need any help?”

“Who are you?” Jimin’s question sliced through the air in such a venomous way that even Minjeong was scared for Yizhuo’s fate.

Yizhuo visibly flinched. Without even breaking eye contact, her hand reached for the doorknob before she pulled the door close excruciatingly slowly, her figure vanishing behind the door as easily. It was unspoken yet Minjeong knew Yizhuo was implying, ‘you handle that yourself, I don't want to interfere.’

“Minjeong-ah.”

Hazel eyes met onyx ones. Minjeong gulped at the sheer intensity within that gaze.

“Y-Yes?” She squeaked out.

Jimin heaved a sigh. Her hold on Minjeong’s robe loosened as she gently stepped back.

“I scared you off too much, didn’t I?” Jimin brought a hand to her nape, her face was flushed red. Her tone was gentler. The next time her gaze met with Minjeong again, there was no sort of annoyance nor frustration. Only genuineness. “I’m being sincere, you know.”

The air seemed to thin, as though a piece of her soul had slipped quietly into the distance, leaving behind a meaningless void. She only stared at Jimin with a blank expression, not really knowing what to do. The whole confession rested heavily on her heart, the acknowledgement itself was something she couldn’t really decipher considering how a person like her even deserving of receiving such genuine love from someone like Jimin.

Is this even real?

Her hand subconsciously went to reach for her chest, palm pressing against it to make sure whether it was still beating. And indeed it was, proving further that this was not the figment of her imagination. Her trembled gaze didn’t go unnoticed by the actress.

“Why would you like someone like me?” Her words sounded so painful even to her own ears. It was more like sheer disbelief and an impending doom, knowing nothing good would ever happen. She covered her face with both of her hands, wishing that this whole thing was merely a dream. “This shouldn’t happen. Why do you even like me?”

The prospect of Minjeong being loved by someone sounded so foreign. It was almost like reaching for the stars, the possibility itself was very unlikely. What was there to love? Every part of her was unlovable. She was born with callouses and scars, and it was one thing she hated about herself—especially when she saw how everyone else seemed to have such good lives, while she was broken beyond repair, barely able to love herself.

“Y-You shouldn’t. I’m not capable of…” Her voice faltered, reflecting her inner turmoil. “I’m not capable of receiving love, much less loving you.”

Yearning and loving were two different things.

Yearning, she found, was easier. Yearning was deep, intense longing for something unattainable. The desire and ache that came with it were easier to cope with, knowing she deserved nothing. There were no expectations, no hope. She could live with the pain alone, for it was the only thing she truly knew.

But loving... it required far more than simple admiration and care. 

Minjeong’s next words sounded so fragile, as if every syllable had every fibre of her soul ripped out of her body. It was painful. It was purely pitiful.

“Loving is just something that I’m not born to be.”

The words lingered in the air, and a tear followed, slipping down Jimin's cheek as though it had been too ready to fall. Jimin’s hands were warm against her cold ones and before she even had the chance to slip away, Jimin had already intertwined them together.

“Hey, hey, please my love , hear me out first.” Jimin’s deep voice was soothing amidst the whole thing. Minjeong wondered just how much more Jimin’s patience could endure. “You haven’t realised this yourself but you’ve been nothing but loving. You may not have been born with love but all I’ve ever received from you was nothing but love.”

Minjeong didn’t realise she had been crying until she felt Jimin’s hand wiping the tears away. Amidst the blurriness of her vision, Jimin’s gaze was nothing but genuine. If Minjeong didn’t know better, she could swear that Jimin’s gaze was so full of love. It made her heart swell with its intensity.

Jimin was gentle as ever as she cradled Minjeong’s face. The warmth of her palm only made Minjeong want to fold further.

“Don’t belittle yourself. You’re so much more than you give yourself credit for.” Jimin was close. Too close. Her black opium scent was almost dizzying and it was hard to not crumble especially that pair of eyes looking down at her with so much love. It felt undeserving, at most. “You’re more than enough for me.”

Yu Jimin was soft. Her slightly taller stature enveloped Minjeong’s smaller frame ever so easily as she wrapped her arms around Minjeong carefully, mindful of the wounds. Her warmth was apparent, easing Minjeong’s worries and dissolving the weight of her thoughts into endless wisps of smoke, drifting without any trace.

“Please hear me. Please trust me. You’re more than enough, my love.” Jimin’s husky voice hushed into a gentle whisper. It was soft. It was tender. Her warm breath caressed the shell of Minjeong’s ear. “You’re more than enough.”

The tears were warm as they cascaded down her face. Her shaky exhale sounded fragile and she couldn’t help the soft whimper that left her lips as she held onto Jimin as tight as she could, wanting to keep herself grounded from all those overwhelming emotions.

“You’re more than enough.”

Jimin’s soothing whisper carried her throughout the stillness of the moment, washing the self-deprecating thoughts away into the void. Despite the heaviness of her heart and the fears lingering within her mind, she decided to let herself believe.

You’re more than enough.

Chapter Text

“She keeps pushing me away.”

“To make you feel better, she pushes everyone away.” There was a smile in Aeri’s voice, one you could hear in the way she uttered the words. “And you’re the only one who managed to get this close to her. That must count as something, no?”

Karina’s red lips parted yet no words came out. Aeri had a point, as much as she hated to admit. Winter would never smile at anyone else. The only person who received Winter’s playful remarks was her. The only person who had witnessed Winter in her lowest was her. 

The one Winter let herself be vulnerable was none other than her.

Onyx eyes were trained to the floor, not once looking at Aeri who was sitting beside her. The strong scent of medications and disinfectant irritated her nose, and the lack of rest only made it worse. The turtleneck she donned suffocated her to no end, the fabric felt uncomfortable against her neck. One hand reached for the collar, tugging it away from her nape.

Dark brown eyes keenly watched, noticing the wordless annoyance from the actress.

“For someone who just shot someone, you’re surprisingly calm about it. You’re making it easy to believe your biggest problem is with Winter, not the fact that you almost killed a guy.”

“Maybe because it is.”

That one sentence was enough to silence Aeri. This was not Jimin talking, this was the freaking Karina. Aeri knew when she should shut her mouth, knowing things would bite back at her if she accidentally said the wrong thing.

“Give her time.”

Karina finally faced Aeri.

“Hypothetically…” Her voice was deep yet monotonous, giving no room for any kind of emotion to slip through. Her gaze was unreadable. “If I don’t?”

“She’ll run away? I can’t be too sure though.” Aeri shrugged, not minding such a laden gaze directed towards her. “But don’t prod for more if she’s not ready. Emotions are probably something she isn’t used to feeling, it could be overwhelming to her.”

Silence.

Deep brown eyes met onyx ones.

“How much do you know?”

Aeri's question hung in the air for a few tense seconds, filling the space with an uneasy silence. Karina pressed her lips into a thin line, leaning her back against the seat.

“A lot.” A sigh. “Maybe.”

It wasn’t that hard to know once you have Winter’s real name. Maybe that was mainly the reason why Winter was so adamant on not wanting her real name to be known. Karina finally understood why.

There was a knowing glint in Aeri’s eyes. Curiosity sparked within that gaze.

"I suppose you’re already aware that she was a former agent, and the guy from before was actually her supervisor at the time." Aeri spoke.

“ Mhm . What else do you know?”

“The reason she was stripped of her position and ended up living a quiet life—until now, at least.”

“That’s all?”

“Yeah.”

Karina offered nothing but a nod. No sort of emotions dancing in those eyes.

“Then it shall stay that way.”

“ Karina Yu .” A gravelly yet controlled voice greeted, each syllable carrying an effortless weight. Calmness exuded of the owner of the voice, a certain man clad in a bespoke suit as his unreadable gaze swept slowly from Aeri to Karina. There was a small smile on his lips, just enough for it to come out as polite. “Mind if I talk to you for a moment?”

It was a request laced with a quiet command and Karina caught that so easily. It seemed like the tense atmosphere was so noticeable that even Aeri willingly excused herself, leaving only Karina and him at the waiting area.

“Tell me,” he began. “What is she to you?”

“You’re jumping straight to personal questions, sir. Does my relationship with your recruit intrigue you that much?”

His tall figure towered her. Despite this, she remained calm in her seat, not even once faltering beneath his intense gaze.

“You risk practically everything just to save her.”

Onyx eyes blinked. A knowing glint flashed within her gaze.

"You can't relate to that, can you?" Her statement seemed to hit the mark the moment she noticed his slightly faltering gaze. There . She caught him. Considering his line of work, the probability of him being apathetic was high. Even Winter, his recruit, lacked emotions; he wouldn’t be any different.

“I don’t need to.” Came his indifferent reply. “Feelings only make you weak. You sacrificed everything for her but at what cost?”

She didn’t reply right away. Instead, her gaze remained on him, noticing the slight crack within the facade he wore. There was a slight confusion and curiosity hidden beneath his intention, as if he was genuinely wondering why she didn't hesitate to have the trajectory of her whole life ruined just because of someone like Winter.

“It must have been lonely, to have nothing to keep you going when everything falls apart.” Her voice dropped yet there was no hint of malice in her words. It was spoken in a statement, yet she knew it could hurt his pride especially when she noticed the slight clench of his jaw. “That’s quite a lifeless existence, don’t you think?”

He softly exhaled. A moment of silence flew by.

“You're seriously making me rethink my life decisions, and we've only been talking for less than five minutes.”

Her lips stretched into a smile. Less daunting. A bit more approachable.

“I’m sure you’re aware that this moment is just the calm before the storm. Things will get out of hand once the media gets wind of this whole massacre. They’ll place the blame on you, and people will see you as a murderer.” His apathetic tone was something she could easily get used to, knowing well it reflected his impassive personality. “You’ll lose everything you’ve worked so hard for.”

He tilted his head, observing her reaction before adding, “This is the price you have to pay for saving her. Is it worth all the trouble? Ruining your own life just for someone like her?”

She raised from her seat, looking him straight in the eye. Despite being shorter than him, her resolutions were clear as day. Determination burning in her eyes.

“Anything is better than watching her die right in front of me. Even if it meant my own fate being bound to hell, I wouldn’t hesitate.”

And he was left astounded. His speechless expression was quite a sight to witness.

“To that extent?”

Her smile was all she offered before she walked away. Her shoes echoed through the empty hallway, growing more distant with each step, resonating deeply within him. The words exchanged between them swirled in his mind, each syllable carrying its own weight.

“Kim Minjeong, you lucky brat.”

His mumble easily drifted into thin air, unheard by anyone but him.

“I’m glad you finally found someone who cares for you.”

~~~

A thud resounded.

Jimin turned off the hair dryer. Her ears perked for any kind of sound, wondering whether the noise she heard earlier was just her imagination. Upon hearing the faint muffled groan, she wasted no time slipping out of the bathroom and heading toward the room, tightening her robe as she did so.

Her hair was still damp from the shower, droplets clinging to her nape, yet she couldn’t bring herself to care about the discomfort when she saw Minjeong on the floor, clearly caught off guard by Jimin’s presence in her room.

Jimin’s hands were on her hips, a frown sported on her face.

“Why are you on the floor?”

Minjeong's lips were parted, yet no words came out. Her expression resembled that of a lost puppy being scolded for stealing food, and as adorable as it was, Jimin remained rooted to her spot. Minjeong’s hands were still gripping the wheelchair, which was now upside down. It didn’t take long for Jimin to figure out that Minjeong had tried to sit in it on her own—and of course, failed miserably.

Her onyx eyes fell on the bandage wrapped around Minjeong’s shoulder, noting the red stain peeking beneath the shirt. The wound must have reopened, as it had been flawless the night before.

“What did I tell you about asking for help?”

Minjeong’s gaze wavered. 

Jimin narrowed her eyes, her tone firm. “Use your words, my love.”

Hazel eyes averted away. Guilt was as clear as day. Her cheeks were tinted pink and Jimin didn’t know whether it was due to the nickname or the embarrassment for getting caught falling down like that.

A sigh left Jimin’s lips. Her gaze softened. She went to Minjeong’s side, adjusting the wheelchair before assisting her into it. Minjeong wasn't that heavy, but Jimin was never very fit. It was proven to be a bit of a struggle to help Minjeong. So, ever since Minjeong got injured, Jimin made sure to go to the gym as frequently as she could to be able to assist her whenever needed. 

(Aeri shot her a knowing look upon hearing about it, to which she feigned indifference.)

A soft groan left the latter’s lips, almost unheard of if it's not over the fact that Jimin was close to her.

The fall must have hurt.

“You want to take a bath?”

“ Mhm .”

“You want to do it yourself?”

A shy nod.

Jimin’s lips stretched into a cunning smile. Her hands went to Minjeong’s shirt button, easily unbuttoning it.

“As if I’ll let you—” Hands grabbing onto hers, stopping her movement. Hazel eyes stared at her in panic.

“W-What are you doing?”

“Undressing you.” Jimin’s tone was casual, as if they were talking about the weather. And seeing the panicked look in Minjeong’s gaze, that woman must have been caught off guard.

A slow blink. Then Minjeong’s face flushed red in an instant.

“But why?”

“You want to take a bath,” Jimin stated, as if it were the most obvious thing. She swatted Minjeong’s hands and proceeded to unbutton the rest of the shirt, ignoring Minjeong whose face was turning redder in each passing time. She then pushed the shirt down the latter’s shoulder, exposing the bandaged skin beneath. The wound on her shoulder seemed to grow in size, which concerned Jimin knowing how sting it would be to clean it.

Onyx eyes met hazel ones.

“Minjeong-ah,” she called, her voice gentle. A small smile made its way to her lips. “I’ve been doing this for days. Why are you still shy about it?” 

A moment passed by.

Jimin decided to add, “It’s okay to ask for help, you know.”

A subtle sigh. Her next words were spoken so timidly, sounding soft and small. It was different from the cold persona Jimin was used to seeing, and it only made Jimin feel even more protective, wanting to keep her away from the world.

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“I can’t get used to it.”

The atmosphere was heavy. Minjeong appeared so dejected and helpless, as if the guilt was still clawing up her throat. But then again, it was hard to remove something that had become a part of yourself— those thoughts and mindset that shaped her into what she was right now.

“Oh, come on. It's nothing I haven't seen before.” Jimin said instead, wanting to light up the atmosphere.

And it did wonders.

Minjeong’s lips were parted as her brain racked up for a proper sentence. Yet it failed miserably especially when her whole face looked like she was trying not to combust. Jimin held back a laugh, fascinated over the whole thing. She never knew Winter could be this cute when flustered.

“I’ll be gentle okay?” Jimin patted Minjeong’s uninjured shoulder. “Your wound seems to be reopened. It needs a proper clean up.”

And indeed, true to her words, Jimin made sure to not put too much force on certain parts that could possibly hurt Minjeong. She was applying shampoo to Minjeong’s hair and massaging her scalp when she noticed that Minjeong subconsciously leaned further into her, as if enjoying every little ministrations done by the actress. Jimin noticed that Minjeong had always liked it wherever Jimin played with her hair or massaged her scalp even though the latter had never once said it out loud. Her subtle body language itself was enough for Jimin to know.

Upon hearing a yawn, Jimin had to stifle a chuckle.

“You’re sleepy already?” It was intimate, having to share the small space like this and the way Minjeong was the only one who could listen to her voice. It was as if the world would break apart anytime sooner if they weren’t careful enough. Unknowingly her tone was softer, gentler without she intended it to be.

“No, it’s just—nevermind.”

The soft splashing of water could be heard as Jimin rinsed Minjeong’s short hair and for a moment, comfortable silence enveloped them both. Some of the droplets seeped into her robe but she paid no mind to it.

“It’s okay.” Jimin assured. “Tell me.”

The actress patiently waited, wondering whether Minjeong would say a piece of her heart, laying it out for Jimin to witness or she would just hide it away like how she used to do. The quietness that ensued after Jimin’s words were filled with unspoken thoughts and even without facing Minjeong, Jimin knew that woman had a lot of thoughts running through her mind.

“It feels…nice.”

Jimin couldn’t stop the grin from forming. She might have looked like a fool, but who would care, when having Minjeong voice her thoughts was a once-in-a-blue-moon occurrence?

“You like it?” Jimin asked, trying to test the waters. Anticipation made her slightly giddy as she waited for Minjeong’s response.

A notable pause.

“Y-Yeah.” A clear of a throat. “I like it.”

Jimin felt like she was about to combust with happiness. Her heart swelled with warmth in such an overwhelming way to which she tried hard to refrain from squealing.

I would gladly do this everyday if you wanted me to.

“I’m glad you like it.” She said instead, and even if Minjeong noticed the slightly trembled tone of her voice, she was grateful Minjeong didn’t point it out. She was way too excited and it was hard to conceal.

Once Jimin was done washing Minjeong, she pushed her to the bedroom. She made sure Minjeong was thoroughly dried from the excess water before dressing her wound. She wasn’t very experienced in bandaging which led to the outcome being slightly sloppy. But one thing about Minjeong, that woman never complained. Not even once. Despite that, Jimin was slowly getting better at dressing wounds compared to the first time so she considered it as a win.

Jimin had finished buttoning the last button of Minjeong’s shirt when she felt a gaze directed towards her. Minjeong was sitting at the edge of the bed with Jimin standing right in front of her so it wasn’t hard to not notice it. She blinked, meeting hazel eyes who were already looking up at her. She raised an eyebrow, a silent question asking what was wrong.

The corner of Minjeong’s lips tugged into a small smile, her eyes oozed with such complex emotions that Jimin found herself being captivated just by looking into them.

“You’re dressing me up when you didn’t even change into your proper clothes.”

Jimin glanced at her robe, realizing it was slightly messy. The collar had slightly slipped off from where it was supposed to be, the sash knot had loosened, and there were remnants of dampness where water droplets had seeped in.

“Come closer, please.”

Jimin obliged at the request, lessening their distance. The fresh scent of her shampoo and body wash reached Jimin's nose. Dainty fingers reached out, adjusting the collar before they went down to gently unravel the knot. Jimin unknowingly held her breath. Onyx eyes watched as those fingers skilfully tied the knot. Once Minjeong was done, Jimin let out a breath she was holding.

“Thank you for always giving, even when you know I’m not used to receiving.”

Jimin went silent. Minjeong rarely opened up, but when she did, there was just something in the way Minjeong articulated her words that made it reach deep into her heart. There was a certain complexity in the way Minjeong steered through her own emotions and thoughts and even if sometimes they would end up overwhelming her, Jimin felt like it was equally important to know each and every thought process that even led Minjeong to articulate her words that way.

Minjeong was a significant, precious person. Such a shame that Minjeong herself didn’t know about that.

“Thank you for saving me even when I kept everything away from you.” Hazel eyes blinked. Jimin noticed the tears pooled within. “Thank you for willing to risk everything just for me.”

Technically Jimin could be in jail and her status would be deeply tainted just by her own impulsive action for an attempt of killing. But she didn’t. She was lucky Hyunjae did his best to cover everything up considering that stupid, manic guy was also involved in a few high profile cases and a lot of parties were after him. He couldn’t escape even if he wanted to.

“Thank you for taking care of me.” There was a pause as soon as Minjeong said those words. Then the corner of her lips lifted up. 

Unknowingly Jimin did the same, remembering vividly the incident a few days ago on how Minjeong was adamant of using crutches because she claimed that she could still walk but Jimin didn’t approve, even to the extent that she had begged the doctors and nurses to convince Minjeong.

That moment itself was downright embarrassing.

The most influential actress, an idol of many people, begged pathetically in front of healthcare professionals just because of a wheelchair? How absurd that sounds?

But still, Jimin got what she wanted at the end of the day so she counted that as a win.

Minjeong took a deep breath, as if bracing herself to speak the next words. Her voice sounded exceptionally raw and her gaze was earnest. Jimin was captivated by the sheer intensity alone.

“I’m not used to being loved and this kind of thing feels odd.”

The corner of Jimin’s lips curled up. The sight of Minjeong trying to find words to express herself was downright adorable. It was nothing but amusing how Jimin’s heart swelled as easily upon noticing the way Minjeong’s expression morphed into a thoughtful one.

“Is that a bad thing?” Her voice was slightly deeper as she tried to lower her volume, feeling like speaking out loud would break the tranquillity of the moment. 

But somehow, it made her voice a bit huskier, causing the woman in front of her to flush deep red upon hearing it.

Minjeong’s throat bobbed. Onyx eyes noticed.

“N-Not really. I don’t think it’s a bad thing.”

Jimin’s lips stretched wider into a satisfied smile.

“Then that’s good enough.”

A moment of silence.

Minjeong’s hand lightly gripped onto the sheets. There was a flicker of hesitance, a gentle fear lurking somewhere beneath, enough to halt her thoughts but not too overt to the point of overwhelming.

“I’m scared.”

There . She said it. Those words were spoken in such a pure vulnerability that only tugged Jimin’s heartstrings until they ached. Minjeong appeared so small and fragile, even more so considering how Jimin was practically towering over her.

“What are you scared of?” Jimin’s voice was almost a whisper, softness filling in every syllable. Her touch was careful and gentle as she reached for Minjeong’s face, fingers settling against the latter’s jaw. Jimin noticed the clench of Minjeong’s jaw, as if she was seriously regretting saying that out loud in the first place. “It’s okay. Take your time.”

“You’re loving every bit of me that I’m terrified of showing. I don’t know how to make up for that.”

Jimin let out a hum. Her lips pursed in understanding.

“You’re having quite a hard time getting used to that?”

“Sort of.”

Jimin’s thumb lightly brushed Minjeong’s cheekbone, noting how the skin felt warm against the pad of her finger. Onyx eyes trailed from those heavenly eyes, the slope of her nose and down to the supple of her lips. 

Minjeong was precious. Way too precious.

“Even an angel could scar their wings.” Jimin tilted her head, a smile made its way across her lips. 

She leaned closer, closing their distance. Minjeong subconsciously fluttered her eyes closed. Jimin paused, her smile widening upon noticing the latter’s deathly grip onto the sheets. Her knuckles were already turning white because of it.

She’s not ready yet . Jimin told herself. Don’t make her overwhelmed.

“And you, my love .” Jimin’s breath was warm against Minjeong’s face. 

There was a slight hesitation, shown in the way she halted her movement midway. She decided to close her eyes instead and pressed her lips against Minjeong’s forehead, gentle and featherlight. Soft lips against warm skin. 

A shaky sigh left Minjeong’s lips. 

There was a clear sound produced the moment Jimin pulled away, the one that left her warm and gooey inside even if she was the one who initiated it. Her lips tingled, still feeling the remnants of warmth. 

“You’re still pretty even with your wings scarred.”

The moment hazel eyes fluttered open, they were filled with pooling tears. Minjeong’s lips slightly trembled as she tried to contain her emotions.

Minjeong braced a smile, nonetheless.

Jimin didn’t receive a verbal confession from Minjeong. No sort of ‘ I love you ’ nor anything else. Just a simple gaze directed towards her—one single gaze that words couldn’t possibly justify on their own. It carried such a laden emotional weight; a mix of love, longing and guilt woven deep within her heart.

It was unspoken.

The words ‘ I’m sorry for making you wait for me ’, and Jimin understood that as clear as day.

“It’s okay,” Jimin whispered. “I can wait for you until you’re ready.”

Even if it takes a long time, I’m willing to wait.

To love is to be seen.

It was the way Minjeong saw her as Jimin—a person stripped of her fame and status, leaving only Yu Jimin, someone not everyone would truly accept. It was the way Minjeong didn’t put up any kinds of expectations nor judgement and just accept her as she was, not caring whether it was her actress persona or her true self.

What’s love without a little bit of waiting, right?

Jimin would wait for her. No matter what happens.