Chapter Text

The Human In Us

Inuyasha heard her before he saw her. No matter how many years had passed, Rin’s footsteps were still light and familiar, tapping softly against the ground, even in the pouring rain. Her scent was delicate, flowery, like it had always been, and it reached him even through the dampness.

She must be nearly 40 by now, he thought. It had been a long time since they last crossed paths. The last time he had seen her, Rin’s son had married a human, settling into a peaceful life. But Rin... she had stayed by Sesshomaru’s side, loyal and devoted.

A flicker of old memories stirred in him. Time may have passed, but some things hadn’t changed at all.
Her breath was clipped, her voice rough and frantic. “Inuyasha-sama!” she screamed, over and over. It was strange—too strange. Inuyasha’s sensitive nose picked up the unmistakable scent of fear and desperation radiating off her.

Without hesitation, he leapt down from the tree branch where he had been resting and bolted toward her. His mind raced as fast as his feet. Something must have happened. Something bad.
Rin never came alone. Not without Sesshomaru. And if she was screaming like this, searching for him instead of her usual protector, it could only mean one thing: whatever it was bad.
The rain beat down harder, matching the pounding in Inuyasha's chest as he pushed through the trees, the sinking feeling of dread growing with every step.
Rin's eyes were brimming with tears, her breath coming in sharp, uneven gasps.
As soon as she saw him, she let out a shaky huff, bending over with her hands on her knees, struggling to catch her breath. The desperation in her was almost palpable, and Inuyasha could feel the weight of it pressing down on his chest.
She looked up at him, her face pale and soaked from the rain, and in that moment, Inuyasha knew—this was going to be worse than anything he had imagined.
“Inuyasha-sama,” her voice cracked, trembling with urgency. “Please... help me.”

Whatever had driven her here, whatever had separated her from Sesshomaru, was beyond anything he’d seen in years. His stomach twisted, but there was no time for hesitation.
"What happened, Rin?" he asked, his voice low and steady, even as he felt the storm rising inside him.

As soon as Inuyasha jumped off the dragon’s back, his hand instinctively gripped Tessaiga. Rin had assured him that he was expected, and he trusted her word. But trusting anyone else in this place? Not a chance. The palace loomed before him, with its wide entrance and immaculate gardens filled with flowers he had never seen anywhere else. Between him and the castle was a long staircase, but even with the distance, his sharp ears picked up the sound of footsteps—several of them. Light, delicate, and unmistakably female. Strong too.
A few seconds later, the massive stone doors of the castle creaked open, revealing a woman surrounded by her maids. Inuyasha had heard whispers about her before, but seeing her now was unsettling. The resemblance to his asshole of a brother was uncanny. She descended the stairs with an effortless grace, as though she were floating, and every instinct in Inuyasha screamed danger. Yet, he held his ground.

The courtyard, once empty, was now filling with onlookers—servants and inhabitants of the castle, all of them staring. Inuyasha could feel their gazes, the scrutiny, the judgment. He stood there for a moment, carefully calculating his next move before stepping forward and bowing slightly, surprising everyone.
"Sesshomaru no Hahaue-sama, it is an honor to meet you."

A ripple of whispers spread through the crowd, disbelief evident in their murmurs. Inuyasha felt the tension rise in his muscles, his discomfort palpable. The crude, loud half-demon they expected was nowhere to be seen. Few knew that his human mother had taught him proper etiquette, and while he didn’t care about what the crowd thought of him, any misstep in front of Sesshomaru’s mother would reflect on his mother. And he would not allow anyone to smear her name, no matter the cost.

The woman, the Inu no Kami, regarded him with a poised, almost amused expression. Her eyes flickered with the faintest trace of amusement, though her demeanor remained perfectly composed, unaffected by the situation. “Inuyasha…” she acknowledged, her voice calm yet commanding. She glanced around at the whispering crowd, and as if on cue, the noise died. The onlookers averted their eyes, retreating into the shadows of the castle.

Inuyasha stood there, unsure of what to do next. He felt the weight of every glance, every expectation pressing down on him. But as Rin rose from her kneeling position before Sesshomaru’s mother and followed her into the castle, Inuyasha took a breath, and with silent resolve, followed too.
His instincts screamed to stay alert—this place was a den of wolves, and he was walking straight into their territory. But for now, he would play their game, if only for Rin’s sake.

The castle's interior was even more mesmerizing than its exterior—lavish yet subtle, every detail exuding wealth without the need for excess. Ornate vases, grand portraits, and delicate flower bouquets adorned the halls. Inuyasha couldn't help but think, once again, about what might have been—what if his life had been different? What if he had grown up here, like Sesshomaru, basking in luxury and power? But those thoughts, as always, were quickly buried.

He redirected his focus to Rin. She was no longer the young girl he remembered—she was a woman now. She carried herself with quiet strength, but it was impossible to miss the exhaustion that weighed her down. She favored one leg, likely from an old injury, her back slightly bent, reminding him of old Kaede. Her steps were heavy, each one betraying just how tired she truly was. But throughout their entire journey here, she had remained silent, never revealing what had driven her to seek him out. That silence, paired with the way she avoided his gaze, made his stomach knot with dread.

The closer they got to their destination, the more certain Inuyasha became—something had happened to Sesshomaru. He could feel it. The weight of the unknown settled heavily on his shoulders, but despite everything, he kept walking. He was here to help, whether Sesshomaru deserved it or not. The bastard would likely insult him the moment he found out he was here, spitting something like, "How dare you, half-breed, foul the air of my castle?" Inuyasha didn't know why he had come. Why am I even here? he thought to himself. Surely, he would regret this.

But when the Inu no Kami, Sesshomaru’s mother, stepped through the massive double doors ahead, all of his thoughts came to a halt. She stepped aside, allowing him a view of the room beyond, and his world froze in place.
The doors closed behind them with a soft thud, sealing them inside. Rin rushed forward with a sob, her hand reaching out for the figure lying on the bed. But Inuyasha couldn’t move. His breath caught in his throat, and his heart pounded as he looked at his brother—if that was even Sesshomaru.

Sesshomaru was almost unrecognizable. His once strong, imposing figure had withered away, leaving a gaunt, ghostly shell of the proud demon he had known. His skin was ashen, his face pale with deep, dark circles under his eyes. His cheeks had sunken in, and he was alarmingly thin, his form barely a shadow of the powerful daiyokai he had always been. Bloodstains dotted the blankets around him, fresh and stark against the white fabric, as if he had coughed them up just moments before.
Inuyasha’s chest tightened. He had never imagined seeing his brother like this. The air in the room was thick with something heavier than grief—dread, maybe. Sesshomaru, the strongest being he had ever known, was lying there, broken.

Rin knelt beside the bed, sobbing quietly as she held his hand. Her pleas and whispers barely reached Inuyasha’s ears. He stood frozen at the doorway, not sure what to do, not sure how to feel.
For once, he had no words.

Inuyasha didn’t know how long he had stood there, staring. It felt like time had slowed to a crawl, every second dragging out as he took in the sight before him. Nothing about this felt right—his brother lying there, frail and vulnerable. Sesshomaru, of all people, reduced to such a state. The once proud and powerful daiyokai was dressed in a simple kimono, no armor in sight. His swords, which had always been an extension of his very being, sat cleanly displayed next to his armor, untouched. It was all so unnatural.

But what gnawed at Inuyasha the most was the smell. The unmistakable stench of decay, of something foul and rotting, lingered in the air. It clung to Sesshomaru, mingling with the scent of blood and death. Inuyasha’s stomach churned, and the disgust and frustration bubbling inside him could no longer be contained.

“What the fuck is happening to that bastard?!” he shouted, turning to face Sesshomaru’s mother, his voice cracking through the tense silence like a whip. His crudeness, unfiltered and raw, spilled out—he couldn't hold it back any longer. The smell, the sight of his brother like this—it was too much.

The room seemed to go still at his outburst, and Rin flinched at the harshness in his voice, her sobs quieting for a moment. But the Inu no Kami, the Lady of the West, did not flinch. She merely regarded him with the same poised, cold expression she had worn since his arrival.
Inuyasha’s gaze remained fixed on his brother, the sight and smell of him nearly overwhelming. His anger and confusion boiled over, and he shouted, “What the fuck is happening to that bastard?!”

The Inu no Kami, the Lady of the West, regarded him with an unwavering calm, her poise unshaken by the outburst. Her tone cool and composed, “Sesshomaru is afflicted by an ancient curse.”

Inuyasha’s eyes widened, his mind reeling at the gravity of the situation. “A curse? What the hell kind of curse could do this to him?”
The Lady of the West’s face remained as serene as ever. “This curse was cast by a powerful dragon yokai, an old enemy of Sesshomaru. The dragon’s younger brother was slain by Sesshomaru many years ago, during a confrontation where the dragon sought to take Rin as a meal. In revenge for his brother’s death and the perceived slight of killing him over a mere human, the dragon cursed Sesshomaru.”

She paused, letting the weight of her words hang in the air. “The curse is a twisted form of retribution. It inflicts Sesshomaru with human blood—a poison in his own veins. This blood acts like a malignant force, spreading through his cells. His body is in a constant struggle to reject and destroy these cells, but instead, they proliferate, causing increasing damage.”
Inuyasha’s face contorted with disbelief. “Shouldn’t he be able to burn through it? He’s a yokai. Human blood is just a menace to him.”
“It is not real human blood,” she replied, her tone indifferent. “It is magic-infused and therefore more resistant. As time passes, his yoki weakens. Essentially, he is being devoured from the inside out.”

Inuyasha clenched his fists, his anger mixing with frustration as he glared at her. The Lady of the West sat behind a desk, examining her nails with an air of detachment as if discussing something as trivial as the week’s dinner menu. Inuyasha’s urge to scream at the absurdity of it all nearly overwhelmed him.

But then, Rin’s sobs pierced through his turbulent thoughts.
He turned to look at her, his heart aching at the sight. He remembered Rin as a child—loud, active, kind, and ever so unbothered. She had always looked at him with a bright smile, but now she was older, her face wrinkled with the weight of her grief. The tears in her eyes cut through Inuyasha’s anger. He knew that Sesshomaru had cared for Rin deeply, had been like a father to her. And Inuyasha understood the pain of watching a loved one die, having faced it with his own mother.

Swallowing his intended curses and outbursts, Inuyasha turned back to Sesshomaru’s mother. “But I can help, right? I wouldn’t have been called here otherwise.”
A glint of cold amusement flickered in the Lady of the West’s eyes. “You are a hanyou, possessing both demon and human blood. Your very existence requires a balance between these two elements. Your blood is familiar to Sesshomaru’s, and it contains a natural stabilizer.”

Inuyasha’s eyes narrowed as he pieced it together. “So, you need my blood.”

The Lady of the West’s gaze hardened, a predatory glint in her eyes. “Precisely. Your blood could potentially stabilize the curse’s effects, offering a chance to mitigate the damage.”
As she spoke, her eyes seemed to shine with a cold, calculating light, leaving Inuyasha with the undeniable feeling that this was just the beginning of a much larger and more complicated struggle.

闇の道
Yami no michi

凍える風
Kogoeru kaze

終わりの鐘
Owari no kane

The road of darkness
The freezing wind
The bell of the end

Chapter Text

And I Hold Your Hand While You Walk The Rope Between Life And Death

InuYasha was escorted down the hall to a room so ridiculously luxurious by a demon maid that clearly disliked him to his core. The demon's name was unknown—InuYasha thought it unnecessary to introduce himself, so he hadn’t bothered either. As soon as they reached the room, the demon disappeared without a word. The room was larger than most houses in his village. It had a massive window overlooking the garden; beneath it, a huge wooden bed piled with soft-looking pillows and pelts. There was a seating area with two massive chairs and a small table, a fireplace that burned despite the bright daylight, a dresser, and even an attached bathroom... tub? filled with steaming water. The walls were an unnatural shade of white stone, and the floor was polished dark wood. InuYasha had seen wealth before, but never like this. He stood in the middle of the room, feeling out of place, as if even touching something would soil it.

InuYasha’s ears perked up at the sound of light footsteps approaching. A little fox demoness entered the room—tiny, with red hair, black-rimmed golden eyes, and a white kimono adorned with orange maple leaves. Cute, InuYasha thought.

The maid entered, head bowed, kneeling before him with a selection of expensive kimonos in her arms. “InuYasha-sama, my name is Yue. I am here to assist with your bath and clothing.”

InuYasha turned, disgusted at the thought of anyone bathing him. “Pha, as if,” he muttered, leaping out the window without a second thought. Both Yue and the guard standing outside screamed in shock. But InuYasha relaxed the moment his feet touched the grass and soil. He leaped further into the garden, settling into a tree.

Once perched among the branches, he huffed. Even the garden was too perfect—no weeds, flowers arranged meticulously around the trees, and even the trees themselves grew in unnatural symmetry. Everything in this castle felt excessive, and InuYasha hated it. Of course, the bastard had to live in a place where even the trees were too afraid to grow in the wrong direction. He closed his eyes, folding his arms behind his head. Sesshomaru...

It was strange seeing him so broken. Sesshomaru had lost an arm without much of a reaction, but now some damn curse had brought him to his knees. InuYasha couldn’t believe it. The Sesshomaru he knew was strong, cold, and unyielding. An arrogant prick who would never succumb to something so low as a curse. Even weakened, he’d still be stronger than most.

He remembered their first meeting—Sesshomaru, illuminated by the full moon, looking down at him with disgust. InuYasha had been nothing more than a dirty, wounded child, tired from being chased all day. He had dreamt of a big brother who would protect him, the last of his family. But that night, those dreams shattered. Sesshomaru had hated him, loathed him for being a hanyou, an embarrassment to their bloodline. InuYasha had hoped for love, but instead, all he received was cold contempt.

He had never dreamed of family again after that.

Now, he didn’t need anyone. He was grown, with friends—human and yokai—but he preferred solitude. It was easier that way. Sango, Miroku, Shippo, Kouga—none of them fit entirely into his world. He was too yokai to live among humans, and too human to feel at ease with yokai. After his mother died, no one had bathed or dressed him, and he wasn’t about to start now.

InuYasha sighed, thinking about Kouga. He hadn’t told that fleabag where he was going. Hopefully, Kouga wouldn’t cause havoc looking for him. He still wasn’t sure when Kouga had stopped being an enemy and turned into a friend. After Kagome returned to her world, Kouga had just started showing up out of the blue—at first to fight, or so InuYasha thought. But over time, he realized the wolf was just checking on him.

Now Kouga’s pups called him “Uncle Inu,” climbing all over him to reach his ears. InuYasha couldn’t understand how the stinky wolf had managed to contribute to something so cute. Definitely, Ayame’s doing. Kouga had invited him to stay with the pack several times, but InuYasha always declined. He liked his freedom. He could fight, rest, travel—do whatever he wanted. All he needed was a tree to sleep in, the wind through the leaves, the soil under his feet, and the stars above. That was enough for him.

And when his human blood took over once a month, there was no one around to stare at him in wonder or disgust. Human blood—the poison in his brother’s veins.

InuYasha’s fists clenched as he remembered—his brother was all he had left as family. And he would help. He was a fool for doing it, but at least he could be useful. Maybe Sesshomaru would tolerate him for once. Or maybe he’d tear InuYasha apart for daring to get involved. But imagining Sesshomaru dying, knowing he could have helped, made him sick.

The sky darkened above him, heavy with the promise of rain. Rin’s voice echoed through the garden, calling for him. For a moment, his heart raced in fear—had something happened to Sesshomaru? But when he looked up and saw her at the window of his room, he calmed.

As InuYasha leaped back into the room, Rin and Yue were standing there. Yue looked at him nervously. “Inuyasha-sama, excuse my behavior earlier. Rin said I may have crossed a line, and I apologize. From now on, I’ll try to do better. It’s a pleasure to meet you,” she said, flashing a toothy grin, her fox ears twitching with excitement.

InuYasha snorted. “Yeah, yeah.” He waved it off as Rin laughed.

Rin walked over, reaching for his hands. InuYasha let her. She smiled up at him, her missing front tooth showing. “Thank you for staying,” she said softly.

For a moment, InuYasha just stared at the child, her bright smile filling him with warmth. He nodded. “What now?” he asked.

“We’re waiting for the healer, Kazumi.”

Inuyasha’s fists clenched tightly at his sides, his knuckles turning white. The room suddenly felt too small, the scent of the wood smoke from the fireplace choking his breath. His voice wavered as he asked, “Dragon yokai?”

“Yes, do you know her?” Rin’s voice was light, innocent. “Kazumi-sama is so wonderful, Inuyasha-sama,” she beamed.

A cold shudder ran through him. The name alone was enough to send him spiraling back into memories he had tried so hard to bury. Kazumi… no, it couldn't be her. Not after all these years.

The ground beneath him seemed to shift, as if the very earth was being pulled away. He dug his nails into his palms to steady himself, forcing his voice to remain calm. “Wonderful, huh?” he managed, though it tasted like ash on his tongue.

Chapter Text

left me bleeding now you've come to watch

The moon shone directly onto the bed, casting an eerie glow over Sesshomaru’s pale form. He looked ghostly, as though he might fade away at any moment. InuYasha sat beside him on a chair that had once belonged to the attending maid, who had fled the room after just one glance at his scowling face. He hadn’t exactly scared her away on purpose, but the anger and frustration etched on his features had made an impact.

Now, left alone in the room, InuYasha tried to calm himself down. Kazuha was coming. They would have to see each other again. Worse, he would have to trust her—trust her with his body—to heal that stuck-up bastard lying on the bed. He sighed heavily, the weight of the situation pressing down on him. Kazuha might be a bitch, but even he couldn’t deny her skill. If anyone could help Sesshomaru, it was her. Still... how cruel fate was to reunite them like this?

Sesshomaru’s hand suddenly shivered, then twitched, breaking InuYasha’s train of thought. Without thinking, he reached out and grabbed it. For the first time, InuYasha held his brother’s hand—not in a fight or as part of some violent clash, but as an act of connection. Sesshomaru’s hand was cold, bony, the fingers long and tipped with sharp nails, perfectly capable of slitting InuYasha’s throat. But in that moment, the anger that had roiled in InuYasha's chest vanished, replaced by something quieter, more profound.

They’d fought each other countless times, and even together against others. But they had never touched in a way that wasn’t violent. Now, here he was, holding Sesshomaru’s hand as though they were... brothers. InuYasha scoffed internally. It was just holding hands, and yet it felt scandalous, intimate in a way that unsettled him. His thumb unconsciously stroked over Sesshomaru’s knuckles, and then over the sharp, white nails, when suddenly Sesshomaru’s grip tightened, and he began thrashing in pain.

The room filled with the rancid stench of blood as Sesshomaru coughed up dark, viscous blood. Instinct kicked in for InuYasha—an urge to protect, to take care of the one thing that remained of his bloodline. Without a second thought, he bit into his wrist, drawing blood, and forced it toward Sesshomaru’s mouth. Sesshomaru, grimacing in agony, had his mouth tightly shut, so InuYasha shoved his wrist closer, pressing the wound against his brother's lips. Finally, Sesshomaru let the blood trickle in.

After a few agonizing minutes, the thrashing subsided. InuYasha exhaled a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding, his heart still pounding from the ordeal. He couldn’t even begin to imagine the pain that could bring Sesshomaru—his brother—to such a state. As the wound on his wrist healed and Sesshomaru stilled, InuYasha felt a small wave of relief wash over him. His demon senses were still on high alert, instincts screaming at him to protect the other Inu, but he forced himself to breathe deeply and calm down.

The quiet was soon disturbed as InuYasha heard footsteps approaching, the familiar scent of disinfectant and herbs hitting his nose. Kazuha. Along with her came Sesshomaru’s mother, Rin, and the ever-loyal Jaken. Sesshomaru’s mother stood at the door, disinterested as if her son’s life wasn’t hanging by a thread. Rin, on the other hand, was wide-eyed, her face pale with fear. Kazuha stepped inside, assessing the situation with her sharp gaze. Her eyes lingered on Sesshomaru’s body, the blood still smeared around his mouth, and then moved to InuYasha’s wrist. Finally, they fell on his hand, which was still clasping Sesshomaru’s.

InuYasha pulled his hand away as if burned, taking a step back from the bed, away from his brother. Kazuha stepped forward.

“Good job, InuYasha. I’ll take it from here,” she said, her tone surprisingly calm. She raised both hands over Sesshomaru’s chest, the green healing light radiating from her palms as her expression grew focused and stern.

Jaken, who had been running in circles and wailing the entire time, suddenly turned on InuYasha. “YOU! What have you done to my master?! How dare you even step into his room, you worthless—”

Without hesitation, InuYasha kicked the imp straight out of the window. Jaken’s shriek echoed as he flew, but no one in the room reacted—no one even flinched. Some things never changed. InuYasha huffed, his eyes turning back to Kazuha, who was still deep in concentration.

After a few moments, Kazuha pulled her hands away, the green light fading as she stood up straight and wiped her brow. “He’s stable now. That’s all I can do for the moment. Your quick reaction saved him, InuYasha,” she said quietly.

Rin’s eyes sparkled with gratitude, looking at InuYasha as though he had hung the moon. Sesshomaru’s mother glanced briefly at him but said nothing as she turned and walked out of the room. Rin followed after her, giving InuYasha one last grateful look before disappearing behind the door.

The room felt too quiet once more as Kazuha and InuYasha stood there, neither saying a word at first. They just stared at each other, the weight of the past and unspoken things pressing down on them both.

After what felt like an eternity, Kazuha broke the silence. “It has been a while. How have y—”

“Stop.” InuYasha didn’t let her finish, his voice hard and sharp. “Let’s get straight to the point. You’re here to help, and so am I. Let’s finish this as fast as possible.”

The unspoken and then never see each other again lingered between them, heavy and bitter. Kazuha’s face barely changed, but they both knew what he meant. There was no need to say more.

And so the silence stretched on, fragile and tense.

Chapter Text

"I’d walk through fire and never avoid a fight, but what do I do against the silence?"

The next day dawned gray and rainy. Inuyasha normally loved the rain, the way it drowned out the world with its rhythmic pit-pat. But this wasn’t just rain; it was like the sky was dumping endless buckets of water over the castle.

Restless, Inuyasha had tried to sleep, but after hours of tossing and turning, he couldn’t take it anymore. He bolted from his room, unsure of where he was going but desperate to do something. Anything.

He followed the faint traces of energy in the air until he found himself standing outside a council room. The doors were open, and inside, group of demons of various races stood around a large table, focused on a map. They didn’t seem to notice Inuyasha at all.

A human-looking demon with golden eyes was speaking. “—heard about our lord being sick, and now the cowards think they can invade our territory. The dragons in the north and the oni in the east are preparing their armies. Usually, we wouldn’t have a problem, but with the lord unable to lead, we can’t afford to leave the castle or the borders unprotected.”

An older cat yokai nodded. “Three fronts with how many troops?”

“If we exclude the castle guards and those protecting the borders, we have one troop left to deploy,” the golden-eyed demon replied.

“Three fronts and one troop?” The cat yokai huffed in disbelief.

Inuyasha glanced around the room. Sesshomaru’s mother sat in a corner, looking as indifferent as ever. Beside her, a maid stood, equally expressionless. Among the gathered warriors were a bear yokai, a kitsune with five tails, and a humanoid panther demon.

Without thinking, Inuyasha stepped forward. “Let me handle the dragons in the north. Send the troops to the east, and I’ll send a messenger to the wolves. They’ll help secure the border.”

All eyes turned to him. The cat yokai eyed him skeptically, a sly grin spreading across his face. “And who might this young inu yokai be?”

“Inuyasha,” he said, standing straighter, ready to defend himself.

Before the cat yokai could respond, the golden-eyed demon grinned and approached Inuyasha, grabbing his hand with both of his. “Inuyasha-sama! It’s an honor. I’ve heard so much about you. To finally meet the second son of Touga, how exciting!”

Inuyasha was taken aback by the panther demon’s enthusiasm. “Eh…”

The panther quickly realized his mistake. “Ah, I didn’t even introduce myself! I’m Haori, of the panther clan. This is Nekominu from the cat tribe, Hyorin from the kitsune, and Bao from the bear tribe.”

Inuyasha gave the group a once-over. Nekominu, with his awful green and red kimono, grinned and nodded at him, his cat ears twitching. Hyorin, the kitsune, looked like a child but was probably older than anyone else in the room. Bao, the bear yokai, had scars covering his body, the most prominent one slicing through his eye. He gave a deep bow, smiling as he straightened.

Still, there was doubt in their eyes, especially from the older yokai. "You think you can take on the dragons alone?" Nekominu asked. "And why would the wolves help us? They have no reason to.”

“They will if they know I sent you,” Inuyasha said without hesitation. “Because… they’re family.”

The room drowned in silence and Inuyasha wanted to jump out of his skin, a loud laugh cut through it and Bao slammed his fists on the table while doing so. "Allright little Inu, go ahead. There shouldn't be a problem, the dragons probably won't send any high-ranking yokai, they are trying to poke around and watch our reaction and if the wolfes fail, I will send some of my own men."

Nekominu nodded like a puppet with a grin and Inuyasha wondered how did these crazy guys make it into Sesshomarus council...

When he was about to turn away and leave Inuyasha saw Sesshomarus mother had already left and Inuyasha hadn't even realised when. Something about that woman gave him the chills and all his instincts screamed for him not to trust her. But for now, Inuyasha had to focus on his mission.

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Inuyasha wasn’t used to traveling with anyone else, but having Haori, who was surprisingly talkative, with him was a change of pace. They rode on A-Un, Sesshomaru’s beast, toward the northern border. Haori talked endlessly about everything, from gods and the world to his family and his admiration for Sesshomaru. Inuyasha listened with half an ear, more focused on the upcoming battle.

But when Haori went silent, Inuyasha glanced over in curiosity, only to find the panther staring at him. “You know,” Haori said, his voice thoughtful, “Sesshomaru-sama is cold and cruel, but I believe he’s proud of you.”

Inuyasha scoffed. “Ha. As if.”

“No, really. After Naraku, there was a banquet with many high-ranking yokai. One of them made fun of you for being a hanyou. Sesshomaru-sama didn’t hesitate—he cut the fool down with his poison whip, right in front of everyone. I remember him saying, ‘He is still my father’s son and worth more than ten of you.’ He risked war and punishment, but no one dared challenge him after that. He was really cool.”

Inuyasha stared at Haori, his mind reeling. Sesshomaru had done that? Defended him? He huffed, unwilling to let the sudden warmth in his chest show. “Yeah, well, sounds like him. Doesn’t mean much.”

Haori just smiled, leaving the conversation there. The rest of the journey passed in relative silence, and soon enough, they reached the northern border. The smell of smoke and burning wood filled the air.ANd as they got closer it tasted of ash and destruction, a scene of devastation unfolding before them as they approached.

The fire had already claimed much of the forest, slowly devouring it, piece by piece. At the front line, the soldiers of the Western Lands were fighting to hold back the advancing dragon army. Their movements were sluggish, exhausted, barely managing to keep the enemy at bay.

Without a second thought, Inuyasha unsheathed Tessaiga and leaped from A-Un, landing directly in the thick of battle. His sword hit the ground first, slicing through the enemy forces like butter. Haori followed behind, landing gracefully and silently beside him, the predatory smile of a panther crossing his face.

For all his talk about family and respect, Haori was quick and deadly, tearing through the dragon ranks with savage elegance. Inuyasha, impressed by his newfound companion’s skill, couldn’t afford to be left behind. He charged forward with a roar, plunging into the enemy forces.

The dragons weren’t high-ranking, but their numbers were overwhelming. For every enemy Inuyasha cut down, four more seemed to take their place. His patience began to wear thin. Beside him, even Haori seemed to be tiring from the unending waves of opponents.

“Step back!” Inuyasha shouted over the clash of steel and the roar of flames. Haori, trusting him, jumped behind him just in time.

“Kaze no Kizu!” Inuyasha bellowed as he unleashed the Wind Scar. The energy surged forward, obliterating the remaining enemies in its path. Silence followed as the dust settled, the once unending horde of dragons now reduced to scattered bodies.

Haori looked around, amazed at the sheer devastation Inuyasha had caused. He gave a low whistle of appreciation. “You weren’t kidding. Guess the legends about Tessaiga aren’t exaggerated after all.”

Inuyasha simply grunted in response, sheathing his sword as the soldiers behind them sighed in relief.

One of them came forth, stumbling and heavily bleeding from his head, "Thank you my lords, they surprised us, came out of nowhere, those cowards."

Inuyasha stepped back, left the talking and the planning to Haori. He was a fighter not a ruler after all.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The journey back was uncomfortable, to say the least. They were both drenched in blood, mud, and the filth of battle. Inuyasha was grateful for his fire-rat kimono, which had the ability to clean itself. Haori, on the other hand, looked miserable as he tried—and failed—to wipe off the gunk.

“You wouldn’t believe what I’d give for a fire-rat robe right now,” Haori muttered, disgusted.

Inuyasha chuckled but didn’t reply. His thoughts had drifted elsewhere, to a memory he had long tried to bury.

“Look!” He had said once, happy and proud, as he held up a tiny version of his own kimono. His smile back then had been genuine—filled with an innocence he had since lost.

Inuyasha quickly shoved the memory away. He couldn’t bear to think about it. Not now.

Back at the castle, the rain was still pouring, relentless and cold. As they dismounted from A-Un, Haori stretched his limbs, clearly eager to wash the battle off of him. He shot Inuyasha a grin before heading inside. “Well, that was fun. I’ll go report to the council. You coming?”

Inuyasha shook his head. “You go ahead.”

Haori nodded and disappeared into the castle, leaving Inuyasha alone in the courtyard. He glanced up at the dark sky, feeling the weight of everything that had happened, of everything he had learned about his brother.

Sesshomaru had defended him. He didn’t know what to make of that.

With a sigh, Inuyasha turned and began walking toward Sesshomaru’s chambers. If his brother was awake, there were things that needed to be said. If not... well, Inuyasha would figure it out when the time came.

For now, the rain continued to fall, heavy and unrelenting.

Chapter Text

And You Scream and Toss, but You Are Deaf to My Pain

The rain had stopped overnight, but an uncomfortable chill had settled in its wake, compelling Inuyasha to retreat to his 'room' rather than sleep outside. As the first rays of sun crept into the sky, hurried footsteps and panicked voices echoed through the castle halls, rushing toward Sesshomaru's chamber. Inuyasha was up in an instant, his instincts flaring as he sprinted past several maids and shoved open the doors to his brother's room.

Sesshomaru looked worse than the days before. His upper body was thrashing violently against Kazuha, who struggled to keep him still while channeling her healing powers into his chest. The door's crash startled her, and she snapped her head up. When she saw it was Inuyasha, her voice cut through the chaos.

"Quick, give him your blood!"

Inuyasha didn’t hesitate. He bit into his wrist and pressed the wound against Sesshomaru’s mouth. The older brother fought back, his body jerking from side to side, but slowly— agonizingly slowly—he began to calm down.

Unlike before, Inuyasha wasn’t sitting behind him, out of sight. Now, he could see everything—Sesshomaru’s eyes blown wide, red and wild, pupils darting from one side to another, unfocused. The usually sharp pink stripes on his face were garish against his now grayish skin. Inuyasha could feel the elongated fangs that would normally tear into him, but there was no strength behind them.

Kazuha remained silent but he could feel her watching him. Inuyasha ignored her, his focus entirely on his brother, waiting for the moment when Sesshomaru would relax. He didn’t know how long it took, but eventually, the violent thrashing subsided. With a combined effort, he and Kazuha laid Sesshomaru down again.

Kazuha’s voice broke the stillness. "Your blood seems to calm him and alleviate the pain, but it doesn’t heal him."

Inuyasha’s heart stuttered. He couldn’t help him?

"But," she continued, cautiously, "I think I could isolate your human blood and attempt to give it to him. It might be the key."

Inuyasha nodded, numb. There was a distant part of him that wanted to snap at her, to tell her that she'd better not mess this up. But all he could manage was a silent acknowledgment.

Kazuha's gaze lingered on him. "Will you be able to trust me during the blood collection?"

Inuyasha huffed, the words bitter on his tongue. "As long as you focus on him and get out of my face as soon as possible."

He knew the impact his words would have. He didn’t need to turn to see the pain that flickered across her expression—he felt it. But it brought him no satisfaction. Just cold, heavy disgust.

There was nothing she could say to change what had happened between them. Nothing could repair what had been shattered.

"I’ll get my tools. We’ll start immediately."

She left, and Inuyasha stayed where he was, sitting on the edge of Sesshomaru’s bed—closer than he’d ever been to his brother without a fight between them. It was a strange proximity, born out of necessity and not of choice. A maid approached timidly, holding a small bucket and towel in her hands. Inuyasha glanced at her and gestured toward the bedside table. She placed the items down quickly and exited the room, eager to be gone.

Inuyasha dipped the towel into the water and began wiping the blood off Sesshomaru's body, moving mechanically, as if he were watching someone else perform the task. The blood was sticky, dark—evidence of how close his brother had come to death. But as his hands moved, Inuyasha wasn’t conscious of the act itself. His mind was numb, his heart beating slowly, steadily.

There was no fear. No panic. Only the heavy silence in his head. His focus remained on Sesshomaru—on the shallow, raspy breaths, the erratic fluttering of his eyelids, the cold sweat that clung to his skin. He could sense it—the death that had hovered so closely around his brother just moments ago.

And yet, all Inuyasha could do was wait in the quiet, in the hollow space between life and death.

Kazuha returned a few minutes later, a knife, a hollow demon horn, and an empty glass bottle in hand. Inuyasha hadn’t moved from the chair beside Sesshomaru’s bed. As Kazuha drew closer, his demon instincts stirred, a low, instinctive growl building up in his throat. Kazuha hesitated, sensing the danger.

“Inuyasha...? I need to come closer to you to collect the blood.”

He knew what she needed, but the rational part of him was slipping as something far darker and primal pulled him inward, almost like falling into the depths of his own mind. A red fog began to spread, clouding his senses. The color deepened, thick and heavy, settling over everything. It was as if the world around him was slipping away, replaced by a crimson haze that seemed to pulse with his heartbeat.

“Put the knife down,” he snarled, his voice edged with the demon's influence.

“Inuya—”

“Put it down,” he growled, louder this time.

Kazuha wisely retreated, setting the knife on Sesshomaru’s desk before returning with just the horn and bottle, hands raised to show she had obeyed. Only then did the growling subside slightly.

Inuyasha felt his demon’s presence loom closer, almost as if it was beside him, sharing his space. He couldn’t understand why his demon felt so protective over Sesshomaru or why, for the first time, the demon was conscious enough to take a stand on its own. But he knew one thing—he trusted it. In recent years, his demon had saved him countless times, and now, as his vision blurred further into red, he found himself falling deeper into that shared consciousness.

Suddenly, his demon form was more than just instinct; it was almost human beside him, a shadow with burning eyes. Though the form crouched low, ready to attack, Inuyasha reached out. To his surprise, his hand didn’t pass through the figure but instead connected, tangible yet warm as fire.

“Calm down,” he told it, voice steady even within the depths of his mind. “If she can’t treat him, Sesshomaru will die.”

The demon tilted its head, a guttural snarl escaping. “D... danger...” it managed, almost as if speaking for the first time.

Inuyasha nodded, steadying them both. “I know, but we’ll protect him. Together.”

The demon’s glowing eyes narrowed, pointing a clawed finger at him. “You... too.”

Surprised, Inuyasha nodded. Slowly, the fog lifted as the crimson haze began to fade. When he blinked, he was back in the room. Kazuha knelt before him, hands folded, her head bowed, motionless to avoid provoking the demon further.

“Tell me what to do. I’ll handle it myself,” he said, voice steady.

The process was easy; Inuyasha cleaned his skin, cut it open, and let the blood drop into the hollowed horn. The cut wasn't deep, so Inuyasha had to cut multiple times since his healing was too quick. When the horn was filled, he held it out, and Kazuha reached for it. Their hands touched, and disgusted, Inuyasha pulled away quickly.

Kazuha didn’t mention it; instead, she got up, walked to the knife she had put on the desk, cut the tip of the horn, and let the blood flow into the bottle. When she was done, she walked to the door, only stopping to say, "I'll be done by the evening."

A few hours later, when Inuyasha couldn't bear the silence, he walked in the gardens and saw Bao talking to some of the guards.

The guards bowed as they saw him, and Bao turned to him with a smile. "Inuyasha-sama, Haori is singing hymns about your fight with the dragons."

Inuyasha smirked and playfully huffed. "That crazy cat better start training; if that much already impressed him."

Bao laughed out loud and clapped him on the back.

"Maybe you'll give me the honor of a friendly match?"

"Sure, but for now, there is trouble heading our way. Tell the guards to loosen up and let him through."

"You mean tighten the guards up."

"I meant what I said—let him through."

"A friend then?"

"A sack full of fleas."

Confused, Bao bowed and headed to his guards.

After he returned, they started a little match. Bao was strong; the hammer-like weapon could destroy a whole village with one blow, but the weight also made him heavy and slow. So what Inuyasha couldn’t make up with strength, he made up with speed.

As the hours passed, he heard a commotion, and soon enough, he looked at Bao, put Tenseiga back into its sheath, and waited.

Seconds later, Inuyasha could feel the attack coming but didn’t dodge, so the foot connected, and he flew against the tree close by. Bao roared but stood still. “You damn bastard, who do you think you are, giving me and my pack orders like you are my damn lord? And then not even checking by.” Kouga growled, pissed at Inuyasha, absolutely ignoring Bao.

Inuyasha laughed, and as he slid down from the tree, he suddenly got jumped by two furry weights. “Uncle Inu!” was screamed into his ears, and big green eyes looked happily up at him. Inuyasha laughed, grabbed both kids in a tight hug, and got up.

“Hito, Kyota, did you grow again?”

The boys laughed and nodded, ready to tell him all about the things he had missed. But Kouga came closer, looking at him disgusted. “Why the hell do you smell like that bitch?”

Disgusted, Kouga wrinkled his nose because of the smell, but as he entered the room, he pulled on his breath, shocked. Inuyasha nodded, “Now you know why I am here.”

“That wrench is treating him.”

Again Inuyasha nodded.

“In four days—”

“And now you know why you are here.”

Kouga looked at him. “Inuyasha... do you know what you are doing?”

Inuyasha looked at him, desperation and fear clearly written all over his face.

“No.”

Chapter Text

<p>Laying Close to You I Caught Fire</p>

Laying Close to You I Caught Fire

Kazuha returned with the medicine as the evening shadows deepened, the air growing heavy with the weight of impending dread. Inuyasha caught sight of her face, and something twisted in his gut—something was off.

The scent of lavender and frost, sharp and cold, preceded the entrance of Sesshomaru’s mother, who entered with a quiet, regal grace. Her presence seemed to suck the warmth out of the room, leaving it colder, more oppressive. She glided toward Sesshomaru’s bedside, her movements almost fluid, like a predator who had already claimed her prey. Her fingers brushed his pale cheek with an eerie gentleness, but to Inuyasha, the gesture felt detached, like a show for an audience rather than a mother comforting her dying child. Her gaze never softened, her touch never warm. It was as though she saw him as nothing more than a fragile doll, something to be played with, not a son.

Inuyasha’s teeth clenched, his body shaking with the effort to hold back the growl rising in his chest. His demon roared inside him, wild and furious, yet he couldn’t let it loose. Not here. Not now. His eyes darted to Kazuha, noticing the pale color draining from her face. She trembled, her hands clenching into fists, her wide, glassy eyes silently begging him to remain calm. And yet, every nerve in his body screamed to act—to protect his brother.

Sesshomaru’s mother hummed softly, almost mockingly, as she lingered a moment longer, her fingers moving slowly over Sesshomaru’s face before they finally pulled away. "The medicine you’ve given him," she murmured, her voice light and conversational, though it carried an undercurrent of something far darker, "is working, isn’t it?"

Inuyasha didn’t answer. His gaze never left her. There was no warmth in her words, no concern in her eyes. Only cold calculation. He didn’t trust her—not her touch, her words, or the atmosphere she wove around them. Kazuha looked pale as a ghost, her pupils dilated with fear, though she remained silent, offering nothing more than a look that begged him to wait. Don’t act.

The queen’s presence seemed to suffocate the room, her silence oppressive as Kazuha moved swiftly, inserting Inuyasha’s human blood into Sesshomaru’s veins. A faint glow of magic followed soon after, a pulse of energy that seemed almost too soft to heal. Kazuha’s eyes flickered toward Inuyasha, the desperation in her expression clear. She worked with an unsettling calm, her expression as cold and unreadable as Sesshomaru’s mother’s.

Inuyasha stood rigid, barely holding himself together. Every muscle in his body screamed to let go, to release his demon. His claws itched, his fangs ached, the growl bubbling in his chest a constant pressure. And then she looked up—Sesshomaru’s mother caught his gaze and offered him a polite, icy smile. It was sharp, cruel, like the bite of a blade, before she turned and left. The door clicked shut, and with that sound, Inuyasha’s restraint shattered.

His demon surged forward like a tidal wave, overwhelming him.

Kazuha, who had moved to check Sesshomaru’s abdomen for any signs of change, froze as the air thickened with the raw power of Inuyasha’s transformation. A snarl ripped from his throat, a feral, guttural sound that shook the walls of the room. Before she could react, Inuyasha leapt.

He threw himself on top of Sesshomaru’s motionless form, his claws flexing, ready to strike. His eyes—no longer Inuyasha’s—were consumed by rage and instinct, staring at Kazuha with wild, unrestrained fury.

Kazuha stepped back slowly, her hands raised in submission. “I’m not your enemy,” she whispered, though her voice trembled. Her movements were slow, cautious, as she backed away from the room, slipping out without another word.

Inside his own mind, Inuyasha was horrified. His demon side took over completely, and he screamed internally, but his demon did not care. It turned its focus back to Sesshomaru, and Inuyasha watched with a sense of helpless fascination as the demon began to sniff Sesshomaru’s neck and shoulders—intent on finding something, some trace.

Inuyasha’s heart twisted in confusion and embarrassment as the demon licked across Sesshomaru’s face, over the delicate pink stripes on his cheeks, over his eyelids, each movement purposeful, reverent. The demon stared at Sesshomaru’s face, waiting. Waiting for what, Inuyasha couldn’t tell.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?!” Inuyasha screamed within the confines of his own mind, his cheeks burning in mortification, but the demon didn’t care. It merely curled up next to Sesshomaru, laying its head on his chest and draping an arm protectively over him.

Inuyasha could only watch in a mixture of horror, fascination, and shame. His demon was moving as though it were protecting Sesshomaru, as though it had claimed him. A mixture of dread and bewilderment flooded Inuyasha.

“Stop it!” he yelled, his voice echoing within him, but it was useless. The demon was already slipping into unconsciousness, and Inuyasha followed it down into the darkness, helpless to stop it.

Kazuha stood on the other side of the door, leaning against it with her eyes closed. Her breath came in shaky, uneven gasps, the adrenaline still coursing through her veins. Slowly, the trembling in her hands stopped, and the tension in her body began to ease. But when she opened her eyes, her breath caught in her throat. There, just a few steps away, stood Haori, his eyes dark and unreadable.

The fact that he had managed to approach without her noticing spoke volumes about her state of mind. She flinched visibly, a small gasp escaping her lips as she was confronted with him so suddenly.

He stepped closer, his face uncharacteristically serious. When his hand gently cupped her cheek, she instinctively leaned into it. There was a comfort in his touch, one that steadied her, grounded her.

“It will be fine,” he said softly, his voice surprisingly calm and steady.

Kazuha wanted to believe him, wanted to hold onto the hope that things would turn out alright. But deep down, she knew that even if everything did work out in the end, the path ahead was full of too many unknowns—too many obstacles waiting to tear them apart.

A few hours later, Inuyasha awoke, disoriented and confused. His ears twitched, itching in a way that made his entire body ache with discomfort. Blinking slowly, his vision cleared, and the first thing he realized was that he was still lying in Sesshomaru’s arms. The absurdity of the situation hit him like a punch to the gut, and he jerked upward, panic surging through him.

But before he could get far, a hand, surprisingly strong despite Sesshomaru’s weakened state, caught him and yanked him back into place. Inuyasha froze, his breath catching in his throat. His eyes met Sesshomaru’s, and for a moment, everything else disappeared.

Sesshomaru pulled him back with a slow, deliberate motion, and despite the burning discomfort flooding his chest, Inuyasha gave in. Reluctantly, he laid back down. The heat of embarrassment was unbearable, but he stayed still, unsure if Sesshomaru even recognized him as his brother or if he thought he was just another fleeting companion. The uncertainty gnawed at him.

As he lay there, the strange sensation of itching returned—Sesshomaru’s breath, warm and soft, brushing against his sensitive ears. Inuyasha could feel it—could feel Sesshomaru’s breath again, more insistent now.

And then, a whisper. The words were so quiet, so close, that they seemed to come not from Sesshomaru’s mouth, but from deep within his chest.

“Run…”

Inuyasha’s blood turned cold. His muscles locked, ready to spring into action. But before he could, the whisper came again, more urgent this time.

“Trap.”

Confused, Inuyasha tried to sit up again to look at his brother, but once more he was pulled back in. This time, it wasn’t breath on his ears but a warm firm tongue that licked over the tip of his damn ears.

This damn bastard.. what the hell is he... did he just ... LICK MY DAMN EARS?!

Chapter Text

Chapter: Keep Your Honesty, It Burns Me

Inuyasha hadn’t slept. Instead, he had wandered the empty halls of the castle, his footsteps echoing softly in the stillness. Somehow, without intending to, he ended up back in his father’s room.

The faint traces of his father’s scent lingered, barely there, but enough to twist something deep inside him. With a quiet sigh, he sank to the floor, his back against the window. Moonlight poured in from above, casting silver light that illuminated the dust particles, making them dance like shimmering stars. It was oddly calming. For the first time in what felt like forever, he exhaled deeply and allowed his mind to unwind, releasing the chaos that had been eating away at him.

But the whispers wouldn’t stop.

"Trap... trap... trap…"

The word echoed in his mind, over and over.

Who?

The first suspect was Sesshomaru’s mother—her presence alone carried the weight of cold calculation. She’d be next in line if Sesshomaru didn’t survive. But would she truly stoop to killing her own son for power? She was too proud for that, wasn’t she? Too arrogant to destroy what she had created with Tōga—his father... Sesshomaru was her ultimate masterpiece. And beyond that, she had never shown any true interest in the throne.

No. It didn’t add up.

"Trap... trap... trap…"

Next, Kazuha. The thought made him pause. She could have done it. The means were there—she could have encountered Sesshomaru while he was roaming and poisoned him. Then, she could act as if she were healing him while concealing her crime. But why? If she wanted revenge, what would the motive be?

Her behavior didn’t make sense. Kazuha had been the one to call for him, even though she knew he’d likely suspect her. She was far too intelligent to risk exposing herself so easily. And if revenge were her goal, what could she possibly gain from targeting Sesshomaru?

It felt wrong. Like forcing a piece into a puzzle where it didn’t belong.

He thought briefly of the neighboring rulers, but they wouldn’t have gotten close enough to Sesshomaru to poison him. They couldn’t even reach him in his domain. And besides, any poison would have acted long before Sesshomaru returned to his lands.

No, the culprit had to be closer.

"Trap... trap... trap…"

Unknowingly, Inuyasha’s claws had dug into the dirt between the floor tiles. When there was no dirt left, his claws scratched against the stone, creating an awful sound that snapped him out of his spiraling thoughts. He blinked and looked at the mess he’d made, his mind momentarily clearing.

Shaking off the cold that had seeped into his body, he stood, swept the dirt back into place with his foot, and left the room.

But as he stepped into the hallway, a chill ran up his spine. It was like a thousand tiny ants crawling across his skin, making every nerve stand on edge.

Someone was here.

The castle felt too still, too quiet, and though his ears strained for any sound, and his nose searched for a scent, he came up with nothing. Whoever it was, they were good—too good.

Inuyasha acted as though he was oblivious, his pace steady as he made his way out of the main castle and toward the backyard.

"Trap... trap... trap…"

Kazuha’s hut stood close to the castle walls, a modest structure that looked almost fragile in comparison to the grandeur of the main estate. Inuyasha approached and knocked.

When Kazuha opened the door, she looked half-asleep. Her hair was disheveled, her clothes slightly askew, and her eyes barely open. She blinked at him, still trying to process who was standing at her door.

Before she could speak, Inuyasha pushed her back into the room. She released a soft sound of surprise as he pushed her back into the hut, kicking the door shut behind him.

The presence lingered, and Inuyasha’s actions were deliberate. They were so close they were inhaling each other's breath and his eyes locked onto hers as if daring her to push him back. For a moment, she did, but then she stilled, her body relaxing in his grip.

Inuyasha could smell the familiar scent, her own scent like fresh pine, and the smell that covered her from working with different plants and roots to create medicine. But Inuyasha also smelt something new... unfamiliar. Haori's scent his mind helped him recognize. A realization he pushed back into the furthest corner of his brain, it had to wait.

And just like that, the sensation was gone. The presence vanished as suddenly as it had come.

Inuyasha pulled back as though burned. His breath came fast and shallow as he looked at her, disoriented and ashamed.

Kazuha stared back, her expression unreadable. She didn’t yell, didn’t snap, but the fire in her eyes made it clear she was waiting—waiting for him to explain. One wrong word, and she’d make him regret it.

“Someone was following,” he said, his voice low.

Her body stiffened at his words, but her gaze softened, understanding flickering in her eyes. She didn’t say anything, but her silence was enough.

---

The next morning, when Inuyasha returned from washing up, Kouga was waiting for him outside his room. His arms were crossed, and he was looking at Inuyasha with unmasked disgust.

“You reek,” Kouga said, his voice dripping with disdain.
Inuyasha smirked at his childish behavior. “Jealous you’re not getting any?”

Kouga scoffed, turning his head away. “Yes, actually. So hurry up and get me back to my wife. You’re coming back with me.”

Inuyasha raised an eyebrow but quickly understood. The new moon was coming and Kouga gave him an out. “Fine. Let me grab my things.”

After a thorough wash, Inuyasha headed to the garden, searching for a servant to prepare Aun for travel. Jaken passed by and huffed. “The insolence of a half-blood acting like royalty,” he muttered under his breath.

Without a second thought, Inuyasha kicked him out of the castle. Behind him, Rin chuckled softly, covering her mouth with her kimono sleeve.

“Are you leaving, Inuyasha-sama?” she asked.

“Yeah,” he said, stretching his arms. “I’m taking the mangy wolf home. The pups miss their mother.” He paused, glancing back toward the castle. “Kazuha’s got enough of my blood to handle any trouble. I’ll be back soon.”

Rin nodded knowingly. She understood why he had to leave, though she’d never say it out loud.

The pups were running ahead and back around Inuyasha's leg laughing and playing, when Inuyasha and Kouga stepped out of the castle.

When Kouga saw Aun waiting in the courtyard, he rolled his eyes. “What? You’re too spoiled to walk now, your Royal Highness?”

Inuyasha smacked him on the head. “Shut up. You can walk back alone, fleabag.”

Kouga growled but didn’t argue.

The pups were giggling as Inuyasha threw them into the saddle. With a grin, he jumped on after them and gave Aun a light nudge. As the dragon took off, Inuyasha looked back at Kouga, smirking.

“See you soon, Inuyasha-sama!” Rin called after him, her voice ringing out across the courtyard. Kouga started running after the dragon, while his own pups laughed and waved at him. The dragon was fast and high up above the tree crowns but Kouga could still hear the dogs laugh as his own kids mocked him for being too slow. Damn, brats.

---

The journey back was anything but peaceful. Kids would be kids, whether human, kitsune, or wolf, and Kouga’s pups were no exception. They couldn’t sit still for more than a few minutes. Inuyasha, half-joking, grabbed the squirming children one by one and tossed them off Aun’s back into Kouga’s waiting arms.

“You deal with them,” he said with a smirk.

Kouga caught them effortlessly, rolling his eyes. “Gee, thanks,” he muttered, though he didn’t seem to mind.

Father and sons ran alongside Aun for much of the way. It was an amusing sight—Kouga kept up effortlessly while the pups tried their best to match his speed. Their determination was admirable, but as the journey stretched on, their pace slowed.

When Inuyasha noticed them visibly tiring, he called for Aun to circle back. The dragon landed gracefully, and Inuyasha gestured for the pups to climb on again.

“Alright, back on you go,” he said, lifting them one by one into the saddle.

This time, Kouga joined them. Inuyasha raised an eyebrow, ready to throw some sass his way, but decided against it. He understood why Kouga wouldn’t leave his kids alone with him right now—at least, not when the new moon was so close.

As they continued their journey, Inuyasha could feel the sun dipping lower and lower, its warmth fading with each passing moment. Every fiber of his body braced for what was to come. The pups, worn out from running, fell asleep almost instantly, their soft snores filling the air.

Inuyasha leaned back, closing his golden eyes as the last rays of sunlight disappeared behind the mountains. His body tensed, then relaxed as the transformation began.

The night grew colder in an instant. The forest fell silent as if holding its breath, and the world darkened around him. Inuyasha opened his eyes again, but they were no longer the same brilliant gold—they were a deep, human brown. His dog ears were gone, replaced by human ones, and the faint hum of his yokai energy dissipated completely.

With the sun, half of him had vanished too.

“Stop staring, fleabag,” he muttered without looking at Kouga.

Kouga had been staring, wide-eyed, in open wonder. It wasn’t the first time he’d seen Inuyasha’s human form, but it was the first time he’d witnessed the transformation.

“Don’t flatter yourself,” Kouga said, though his voice lacked its usual bite. He looked away, a faint frown tugging at his lips.

The process was mesmerizing, Kouga couldn’t deny that. Watching the dog ears melt away into human ones, smelling the change as Inuyasha’s distinct hanyou scent faded into something plain and human, and feeling the sudden absence of any yoki—it was unnerving.

For the first time, Kouga truly grasped how vulnerable his friend became during these nights. No claws, no fangs, no demonic strength or aura. Just a man in the dark, stripped of everything that made him a threat.

And Kouga couldn't help but stare at his friend. Inuyasha, hanyou or not had always looked like royalty, not as regal or sharp as his brother but Inuyasha was still fairly young - Kouga would of course never admit to it. But as a human Inuyasha looked even more elegant ... opulent even.

Inuyasha shifted uncomfortably under the silence. “What? Never seen a human before?”

Kouga snorted, his usual sneer returning. "Never such an ugly one"
Inuyasha glared at him, but there was no real heat in it. “Tch.

Human Inuyasha was beautiful.

As the hours passed, the forest sped by in a blur of trees and rushing streams. Inuyasha remained quiet, his hands busy with the items he had pulled from his kimono—a flask, a horn, and a knife. He worked methodically, carefully collecting the crimson evidence of his human vulnerability.

Kouga watched in silence for a while, busking in his own thoughts. The unspoken tension between them seemed to stretch endlessly until Kouga suddenly remembered.

“You’re human right now,” Kouga broke the quiet, his voice gruff but curious. “Don’t you need to sleep?”

Inuyasha didn’t meet his eyes. “I never sleep during the new moon.”

Kouga didn’t press further. He didn’t need to; he understood. The weight of those words hung heavy between them, conjuring images of a young Inuyasha, small and vulnerable, surviving alone in forests like these, hunted by demons and humans alike. Kouga could imagine him at the age of his own sons, fighting to live while the world turned its back on him.

For the first time, an unfamiliar wave of pity washed over Kouga—not for the man beside him, but for the child he must have been. Inuyasha as a grown man gave no room for pity, but the thought of him as a child was enough to make Kouga want to reach out and hold him, shielding him from the cruel world he’d faced alone.

Kouga smirked to himself, trying to shake off the feeling. The mud would’ve killed him, hanyou or human, didn’t matter.

Instead of voicing his thoughts, Kouga changed the subject.

“Did you really sleep with her?” Kouga’s voice was low, tinged with disgust.

Inuyasha didn’t react right away, still focused on his task. Eventually, he spoke, his tone neutral.

“I was in her hut, so I could tell her I was leaving...” and get rid of the stalker Inuyasha kept to himself.

Kouga grunted in understanding. The terrain had started to look more familiar, and the scent of home drifted faintly on the breeze.

By the time they were close to the caves, Inuyasha’s skin had grown alarmingly pale. Kouga noticed the signs of blood loss and was about to tell him to stop when Inuyasha pulled the horn away on his own.

"Slow down A-Un" Inuyasha ordered and the dragon got ready to land on the nearest open field. Kouga looked at him
"You are not coming?"
"No, I need to visit someone"

Kouga hesitated for a moment before asking, "You gonna be okay?"

Inuyasha stiffened, his back still turned. He didn’t answer right away, and Kouga almost regretted speaking. The tension in the air thickened, but then—

"I'm not weak," Inuyasha spat, his voice low and sharp.

It wasn’t just anger. It was deeper than that—resentment, shame, something raw that Kouga couldn’t quite place.

Before Kouga could respond, Inuyasha was already moving, his grip tightening around Aun’s reins as the dragon took off. The gust of wind from the lift-off kicked up dust and leaves, forcing Kouga to shield his eyes. By the time he looked up again, Inuyasha was already a fading silhouette in the sky.

Kouga sighed, raking a hand through his hair. He hadn’t meant to hit a nerve, but he should have known better.

Somewhere above the treetops, Inuyasha shivered—not from the cold, but from the weight pressing against his chest.

New moon nights had always been the same. His mother had held him close, whispering that he was safe, that he was loved. But when she was gone, there had been no warmth, no whispers. Just fear, running through the dark, chased by things bigger and stronger than him.

He had survived. He had fought. He had become strong.

And yet, here he was.

Stripped of everything. A body that wouldn’t obey. Claws that weren’t there. Ears that couldn’t pick up the rustling of the wind.

Once a month, no matter how far he had come, the world reminded him just how powerless he could be.

He clenched his jaw, staring at the horizon. He knew Kouga hadn’t meant to insult him.

But knowing that didn’t stop the burning inside his chest.

Because no matter what anyone said, no matter how much he had proven himself—

Somewhere deep inside, he still felt like that same helpless child, running through the dark.

He huffed and closed his eyes. He should calm down. He leans back pulls the fire rat tighter around his body and hides his hands in his sleeves.

A song comes to his mind as he stares at the sky and Inuyasha starts humming it. He does not know where he had heard it from, but as a child, after his mother had died, he had always sung it:

Oh moon, oh moon, where have you gone?
Both you and sun left me alone.
No warmth, no glow, no whispered song,
Only silence, carved in stone.

Oh sun, oh sun, you rise so bright,
Yet leave me lost within this night.
You turn away, you do not wait,
Unmoved by fate, unbound by weight.

Oh stars, oh stars, you watch, you gleam,
Cold witness to broken dreams.
Do you see, or do you stare?
Do you mock, or do you care?

Chapter Text

"Awake, So I Can Break."

The wind picked up, biting at Inuyasha’s skin the closer he got. By now, his cheeks burned as if sliced by the icy air. Shivering, he pulled his kimono tighter around himself, but it did little against the relentless cold. Only when his human ears finally picked up the distant crashing of waves did he allow himself to relax—just a little. A-Un landed softly on the shore.

Nari had to be somewhere here.

But where? If she didn’t want to be found, she wouldn’t be.

That left him with one choice. Call for her. And wait.

He walked along the shore, his voice cutting through the vast emptiness of the night. The sand beneath his feet was wet and freezing, and every step sent a sharp chill up his legs. The darkness was suffocating and blinding, and his foolish shouting was turning him into a living target for whatever creatures lurked in the shadows.

Still, he kept calling her name. He had no choice.

Then, he heard it—a faint, almost imperceptible hiss.

Golden eyes gleamed in the darkness.

A small, grayish snake slithered out of the bushes, its gaze locked onto him. It remained still, staring for a long moment, unblinking.

Inuyasha took a step forward.

At that, the snake turned and slid away, pausing occasionally to check if he was following.

He followed.

He didn’t know for how long.

The deeper they went, the thicker the forest grew. The trees tangled overhead, blocking out what little moonlight remained until Inuyasha felt as if he were moving through the throat of some great beast.

His feet were frozen from the wet sand before, but now the roots and thorny plants cut into his soles, leaving a visible trail of blood behind. He knew it was foolish. He was practically screaming "Here I am, come and take me" to every predator out there.

But he wasn’t worried.

No one would dare come close.

The little snake disappeared into a thick, thorny bush. As Inuyasha pushed past the sharp branches that clawed at his skin, he finally saw a cave.
And even in his human form, he felt it.
A presence. A vast, overwhelming danger lurking inside.

Still, he followed.

The deeper he stepped into the cave, the darker it became. The air was thick, damp, and carried the faint, acrid scent of venom and decay. Shadows twisted against the walls, but the only thing he could truly see were those—

Huge, unblinking yellow eyes.

One eye alone was the size of Inuyasha’s head. The massive serpent lay coiled in the dark, her green scales glistening—splattered with sickly yellow.

Inuyasha didn’t hesitate. But he didn’t rush, either.

He wasn’t foolish.

As he stepped closer, the serpent never broke its stare. The tension between them coiled tighter, thicker, suffocating the air. Then, just as he stood before her, a long, forked tongue flicked out—so close, it almost brushed against his cheek.

He didn’t move.

But to say he wasn’t afraid would be a lie.

He knew Nari’s power. Knew that even the slightest touch of her tongue could kill him instantly. He didn’t even want to think about her fangs—sharp enough to bite through stone. Or her coiled tail, which could wring him out like a damp cloth.

Then, at last, the serpent stirred.

"Inu-son… it has been a while."

The voice slithered into his mind, not spoken aloud—only hissing filled his ears.

Inuyasha finally let out the breath he had been holding.

"Nari-sama."

A low, hissing chuckle echoed in his mind.

"I almost bit right into you. You’ve grown, little one. Almost didn’t recognize you."

A shiver ran down Inuyasha’s spine.

Still, he bowed, keeping his head low in a proper greeting.

"What brings you here?"

Inuyasha clenched his fists, his breath steady.

"I need your help."

"And you thought I would help?"
The voice slithered into his mind, cynical and sharp.

"You did once. Back then… there was no reason either," Inuyasha answered.

"You were a hatchling. Barely able to walk straight."

He remembered.

He had just been kicked out of the village.

He had run—far from the villagers and their torches, even further from the yokai that saw him as nothing more than a quick, easy snack.

He had been so cold. So weak. So damn hungry.

And then he had found it.

A nest.

The eggs inside were as big as him. And between them, a pile of food—tiny frogs, birds, small rodents. His stomach clenched painfully, and his desperation won.

Inuyasha shoved the food into his mouth.

The taste was awful. His stomach rebelled instantly. He gagged, almost threw up—but the hunger was worse.

He forced himself to swallow.

He was still crying when he tried to climb back out.

But then—

The nest moved.

And Inuyasha realized too late—

It wasn’t a nest.

The coiled tail of a massive serpent slowly unwound from the eggs.

Huge, golden eyes locked onto him.

He froze.

His breath hitched in his throat as the creature lifted him effortlessly with its tail, bringing him inches from its gaping maw.

A forked tongue flicked out. Tasting the air. Tasting him.

Inuyasha flailed wildly, kicking, clawing, thrashing—

"I’ve never seen an Inu hatchling before," a voice echoed in his mind.

He hadn’t even realized it wasn’t spoken aloud.

He had been too busy screaming.

The serpent watched him, unblinking. Then, with slow, deliberate movements, she curled her tail around him again—

And pressed him into the warmth of her nest.

The weight of her tail caged him in completely.

He struggled. He fought. He bit, scratched, clawed.

He had no idea how long he fought.

But at some point—exhausted, starving, overwhelmed—

He fell asleep.

Warm. Safe. Protected.

For reasons he could never understand, Nari had spared him.

And for reasons he could never explain, he had stayed.

Seasons passed.

She had hunted for him.

He had followed her.

And all those seasons together, he had never realized—until much later—

The eggs had never hatched.

Maybe he had just found a heartbroken mother.

And maybe that heartbroken mother had found a heartbroken, desperate Inu hatchling to fill the emptiness.

He would have died without her.

And even though he had left long ago, he had never—
would never—forget.

---

"What do you need, little Inu?"

"A few drops of your poison."

A low, echoing laugh filled his mind.

"Tell me, little one, what do I get in return?"

Inuyasha met her gaze, unflinching. "What can I offer?"

She considered him for a long moment before she spoke.

"Bring him."

Inuyasha’s brow furrowed. "Who?"

"Your brother. The one you need my poison for."

He stiffened. "Why?"

"You ask too many questions." Her voice coiled around his mind, final and absolute. "Bring him. When he is healed."

"Nari-sama, I… he can't—"

"Inuyasha."

She hissed his name, and the conversation was over. She had never said his name, she called him inu pup, little one, brat and whatever came to her mind but never his name. So Inuyasha stilled and looked at her.

Inuyasha had to trust that she wouldn’t harm Sesshomaru. But he couldn't think of anything that would need Sesshomarus' presence either, so he wanted to ask but knew the serpent wouldn't answer.

Nari let four drops of poison drip into a shedded serpent's skin. Inuyasha took it carefully, tucking it inside his haori.

Just before leaving the cave, he turned back, hesitating for a breath.

"I promise I'll be back soon."

Then he stepped outside. His still bloody soles carried him back to the shore, where A-Un was waiting for him.

Nari's presence kept most other predators away, but apparently, a bloody human was worth the risk of being dissolved by her poison, and a group of spider yokai came crawling out of the forest.

Inuyasha stared at them, not backing off and when the spiders- too weak to use human speech- attacked, Inuyashas body started to pulse. The spiders midair, were slashed apart by Tessaiga. With one slash his hanyou ears returned, with the next his silver hair and at last his golden eyes and senses. Letting Inuyasha stand in a circle of blood and back in full power. Illuminated by the dawn, even A-Un stared at the hanyou.

By noon he had reached Kaedes village where he strode through the village to "his" tree. He jumped up into the crown and started digging into the trump to search for a bag full of gold. Usually, he had no need for money. He lived in the forest, there was nothing he would need money for. But Kaede and his friends had urged him to keep it, whenever they had got payed for helping strangers on their journey. Inuyasha had never touched it. Therefore the little bundle was quite heavy and filled.

He jumped back down and was met by the village elder. A man barely able to walk straight anymore. His cheeks and eyes were sunken in and covered in wrinkles. A replacement for Kaede. Apparently, the requirement of the village head was being old and wrinkly.

"Inuyasha... you've been gone for a while"

Inuyahasa just looked at him, he already knew what was coming, so he stayed quiet. The geezer hesitated and Inuyasha wanted to grab him and shake him, so he would bring it over with. so he could stop putting up this act, but he remained still, making the situation purposely more difficult for the man.

"You know, I grew up with you around. I know Kaede and even Kikyo were very fond of you. And even I will forever be grateful for all that you've done for us. But the villagers, don't know you. Kaede is long gone and I don't have the power to fight them on this."

Spill it out old man, say it. Prove me right. There is no place for me, where I could stay unbothered. Come on, say it.

"They fear you Inuyasha, and I will have to ask you to leave.", funnily the geezer looked truly sorry and guilty about it.

But Inuyasha just tsked, put the bag into his sleeves and turned.

The geezer called out his name and when Inuyasha looked back at him the geezer held out a bag. Inuyasha smelled Kaede on it, and he went back to retrieve it. The geezer looked at him

"Kaede left this for you, she said that if I ever had to be a spineless toad and had to send you away, I should give you this. She said if I can't protect your home then we don't deserve her treasures."

Inuyasha laughed humorously. Of course, that wrench had known it too. Inuyasha didn't turn back again. Even when the old geezer kept shouting apologies.

This wasn’t a surprise. If anything, he’d expected it sooner. The moment Kaede was gone, so was any reason to tolerate him.

He had known the peace wouldn't be forever though. Because at the end of the day, he was too much of a demon for the humans and too much of a human for the yokai.

He would never have a chance of permanently living somewhere, much less have a home.

His home would always be the forest and whatever tree he had chosen that day.

He wouldn't be sad about this. It was just another closing chapter.

Kagome's chapter had closed when she had jumped into the wall the last time. Kikyos when she had finally died and Kaedes closed right as he stepped out of the village and onto A-Un.

There was nothing left here for him.

Inuyasha would not dwell on it. He would move on. He would help that rigid bastard and go back to his forest. Where he belonged.
And that piercing pain he felt in his chest, he would just write it up as exhaustion, after all this had been the second day he had found no sleep...

For now A-Un flew towards his next destination, a village close to the mountains, known for its craftsmanship.

His hair flew wildly into his face and when he looked down to escape the wind a bit, he looked right at kaedes bag.

He opened it hesitatingly. Inside the silk was a dark wooden box and inside - Inuyasha couldn't help but laugh out- the beads of subjugation.

The chain had ripped years ago, sometime after Kagome had left. He hadn't bothered to pick it back up. But apparently, that old wrench had.

A letter was tugged into the side and Inuyasha picked it up to read:

"Remember me from time to time."

"The chain lost its powers and so did I, there are of no use, but....

Remember me from time to time."

Inuyasha closed his eyes and threw his head back. One hand clenched around the beads, the other around the letter. He held back the tears.

The sun was already setting when he reached the City between the mountains. It was called Taniuchi and was kniw for its craftsmanship and trade. Humans, yokai and hanyous came to sell and putchase whatever they needed. Inuyasha hated the city. It was always bustling always filled with humans and yokais. 1000 different colours at the stands, 1000 different smells and the noise was irritating to say the least. So inuyasha let A-Un fly above the city to a hut much further away from the city center.
Where he knew he would find Tohru. The little Tanuki demon was know for his special abilities and was frequentet by humans and yokai alike. So much so that, commissions took months.

Inuyasha didnt have monts to wait, but he had a favour to cash in.
He jumped right infront of the door of A-Uns back, knocked and opened the door.

Before the door could end squeaking, a voice from inside called.
"Its closed for the day, come back tomorrow."

Inuyasha stepped in anyway.
"I dont have time for that"

Apparently the little tanuki recognized his voice and spepped out of a room hidden behind the shelves.

A bright smile, shining eyes, greeted Inuyasha

"Inuyasha-sama, what a surprise. Come in. Come in."

He took a seat, got offered tea but Inuyasha did not have much time. Something urged him to be fast about it to not dwell, and return to Sesshomaru. He had been gone for almost 2 days, he didn't know how Sesshomaru was doing and if Kazuha had enough blood to help him if needed.
So he cashed in the favor, he got when he had saved Thorus two kids from being a snack and explained what he needed.

Thoru went right to work and Inuyasha was sitting there waiting impatiently. The tanuki quickly gave up trying to engage inuyasha in a conversation, the inu seemed unfocused, miles away with his mind and him just staring at the moon as if he could stop it from going under. Inuyasha was back on A-Un by mid night. And back at the castle before dawn.

The demon was wailing in his mind, roaring and whining and inuyashas guts were clenched.

He hurried passed the guards, passed a pale looking, shaking Rin in the halls and run into Sesshomaru’s room, where a handful of maids tried to push down the trashing and groaning inulord. Sesshomaru was sping blood like fire his eyes vivid red and uncontrolled.

And Inuyasha didn't hear or see anything else than his brother. He couldn't make out anything else but the rotting cupper smell that tainted his senses in red and his own too fast heartbeat that overshadowed every other sound in the room.

He pushed the maids away grabbed his brother, pulled him into his arms, held him down and let the demon trash until he calmed. Sesshomarus body even through both their kimonos was like fire on his skin, burning hot and wet at the same time. He ignored the poison-infused scratches, and the feral snares and held him even closer. In all honesty, wasn't that bastard dying why did he have so much strength left? Sesshomaru visibly grew weaker as Inuyasha didn't let go and in his last attempt to get free bit into his shoulder. Pain flared, sharp and immediate Inuyasha wanted to scream and push the man in his arms away, but instead clenched his teeth and held him closer.

Somewhere in his clouded head, Inuyasha could hear the gasps and screams around him but he chose to ignore it. He ignored everything till it was quiet in the room and his brothers head fell back into the pillow.

His demon roared in fear and fought to push out of him, but Inuyasha had no time for that so he pushed the demon down, told him to calm, that Sesshomaru needed help and surprisingly his demon retreated like a kicked puppy.

Even then he didn't register much of who was in the room. Instead he gripped into his sleeve, trew one bottle of his human blood in kazuhas hands and got to work himself. His own bloodspying shoulder wound was ignored. Later. Not now.

As he held the horn still so his own blood could flow into his brother, he finally looked around. Maids, doctors and inu no kami. He didn't care, with cold furry and unpatience he order them to:

"Leave"

Chapter Text

And when Tenseiga calls for you, I'll cover your ears

When the last drop had been infused into Sesshomaru’s vein, Kazuha got kicked out as well. The healer had tried to resist, had demanded to know what he was planning, called him reckless, irresponsible—his brother was in a critical state, after all.

Inuyasha didn’t listen. He didn’t trust her. Or anyone else. So he got to work himself.

He undressed Sesshomaru with cold detachment, like he was stripping down a puppet, not a person. Not this piece of shit.

Someone had prepared a bowl of hot water and a clean towel. He used it to wipe the pale, blood-soaked body down. Then he wiped off his claws. And got to work.

He started with the thighs—one long, clean cut from pelvis to knee. Then the other. He watched them bleed for a second, a dry scoff escaping him. “I finally get to make you bleed for everything you've done."

He sliced from shoulder to inner elbow—twice. “But you bastard, aren’t even awake enough to feel it.”

Then the last cut: throat to navel. The bed was instantly soaked in dark red, the air clotted with the sharp stench of rotting iron.

His yokai roared in his skull. He pushed it back, held on to his consciousness when his eyes started to glaze over. Shook his head to clear it and kept going.

Nari’s poison went in drop by drop. The beads that had once hung from Inuyasha’s neck now lined the gashes, each one pulling out the foreign magic lodged in Sesshomaru’s body. They were acting as a vessel and the poison, in theory, would neutralize the other poison. Trigger healing.

Sesshomaru didn’t move. Not a twitch.

Every time Inuyasha saw him he thought anew that he had never seen him this close to death.

Blood pooled on his stomach. His skin was colorless, sunken. Bones like driftwood. The legs were just bone under skin. And if not for the blood, he’d be nothing but ash-gray. Gross.

The smell of rot and sickness made Inuyasha gag. Death wasn’t far. He could feel it. So could Tenseiga—it pulsed in the background, soft and sad, like it was already mourning its wielder and master.

Inuyasha’s heart had been racing since he’d walked in. Adrenaline carried him through the process, but now that it was done, the weight hit him like a stone. He reached for Tessaiga, pulled it from its sheath, and forced his breath to slow.

He focused on the yokai inside him. Blocked out everything—smell, sound, fatigue. Only the demon. Only the heat in his bones.

He tapped Tessaiga on the floor once. Twice. power- infused pulses were rolling over the floor. He blended everything else out and soon the pulses, werent coming from the floor but from inside him. Inuyasha zeroed in on it.

It felt like hunting. Inuyasha followed the pull towards that raging fury and heat. And while Tessaiga pulsed harder and harder... the world shifted.

He was back in that red-shimmering place. Face to face with his yokai.

It looked pissed. Hands clasped and bleeding from pressing his own claws into his hands.Pupils shaking. Feral. Wild and ready to pounce. Understandable. It had just watched him gut Sesshomaru like a fish.

It lunged. Inuyasha didn’t dodge. Claws ripped into his torso. He grunted, but didn’t flinch -he was so done with blood everywhere. Locked eyes with the beast and said, “It’s the only way to protect him. Help me. Work with me.”

The demon stilled. Snarled. “How?”

“You remember when I was a kid? You protected me once. Made a barrier. I need that again.”

The yokai shoved him back with a growl. “Saaa...fe?”

Inuyasha nodded. “Yes. He will be. He has to be.”

He reached out his hand. The demon hesitated, then reached back.

The red flames around them grew closer, flared, caved them into one another like they’d always belonged. In the real world, Tessaiga pulsed with that same red energy, brighter and stronger with every beat.

And when the ward finally expanded—covering the bed, the room, the dying man in the center—Inuyasha felt it lock into place like something ancient and unbreakable.

The barrier was part of him. Angry. Burning. Red. Alive. His.

It was like breathing. He didn’t remember much after. Deep in his head, his yokai and him were sitting face to face meditating and releasing yoki bit by bit. He didn't know for how long. Seconds? Hours? Days? He coundn't know. Didn't even need to. All he had to do was keep Sesshomaru safe. Give him time. So he could heal.

Soon breathing started to get hard with less and less air to spare. It felt like he was inhaling flames and exhaling iron spikes - Inuyasha and the demon kept going. Until Sesshomaru was well enough to heal by himself they would not let anyone enter.

He had no concept of time, but he felt the probing, the force that tried to enter. The demon and him locked eyes and strengthened the barrier on that side.

The attacks stopped and Inuyasha and... well the other Inuyasha—he would have to think of a name or something—kept the barrier up.

But Inuyasha was not made of stone. While the new moon left him powerless, the waxing moon gave him a surge of power, like a little consoling gift for going through hell every month.

But he hadn’t slept or eaten well in 2–3 days and he was incredibly tired and drained, so it came as no surprise when his vision started to blur and everything turned black.

The last thing he heard was the barrier shattering like glass, the door crashing open. No no no! Not yet! Sesshomaru wasn’t safe yet—no!

Golden eyes snapped open as his own fell shut.

Did you hear it calling for me too? Back then, all those times that were so close?

You never came...

Chapter Text

You Should Have Run

Inuyasha woke up warm. Sure. And completely disoriented.
He couldn't remember the last time he felt that way - as if his body wasn't preparing for something.

If not the growl of his empty stomach echoing through his ribs, he might have stayed forever in this strange bliss.

Moaning, he forced his senses through the cotton mountain.
They obeyed slowly, as if they had also been drugged.

The first thing he noticed was warmth. Heavy and grounding. Draped over his body, like a heavy blanket. Not dirt, not bark, but clean. Soft and yet solid. Wet on his ears - careful and caring.

With the warmth came a smell - familiar, but different. Herbs, clean linen. No rot, no blood. Just Sesshomaru.

He could hear, muffled, steady breath, close. Too close. Not his own.

And when his eyes finally listened and fluttered open, he was confronted with a pale white chest.

And then his ghost returned to him with a snapshot. He lay in Sesshomaru's arms. And this bastard licked his damn ears again!

With a jolt, he stood up and as his feet touched the ground, the world began to turn. Without the hand that pulled him back into bed, he would have fallen on his ass like a newborn pup.

Sesshomaru went straight back to lick his ears and pull him closer. Inuyasha instantly tried topushed away the arms that held him down.

"Let go, you bastard! What the hell are you doing?!" He screamed in anger.

But all in vain. Sesshomaru did not stop. Didn't even show a reaction.

The once-dying man held him captive. And trying to push the arms away was like trying to push a mountain away. Useless and exhausting.

Deep out of Sesshomaru's chest came a slow-vibrating purr that immediately calmed him. Inuyasha tried to fight it, but his body betrayed him by turning into a puddle. All the tension is gone. He returned to the cotton mountain.

With his last consciousness he thought "fuck you Sesshomaru"

The next time he woke up, the room was covered with golden light, and Rin spoke in a low voice. She wrestled out a rag in a basin filled with water. And Inuyasha would have thought the scene warm and harmonious. Wouldn't it be Sesshomaru who half-kneels over him, growls at the edge, and visibly feral. Red unfocused eyes, shivering body, claws extracted.

Rin, on the other hand, behaved as if it were not even at times, daring to get closer. Like Sesshomaru, she couldn't just rip off her head and be done with it.

As she approached, the growling grew louder, as if to warn her to stay away. As if Inuyasha needed this asshole protection.

Rin saw him awake and immediately brightened.

"Inuyasha-sama, you are awake. So glad!"

Rin rushed to him and Sesshomaru got ready to pounce at her.

Inuyasha called out to her, "Stay there!" He grabbed the arms of Sesshomaru and used his whole body to flip them around. Sesshomaru looked at him. Still wild. But calm. As if he recognized him.

Inuyasha stretched over him and held him down.

"Calm down, asshole. This is Rin!"

Sesshomaru looked at him for a while before finally deciding. Apparently, it was cuddle time. Inuyasha had flinched away when Sesshomaru reached for him. But this damn bastard had started purring again and all his instincts melted immediately.

Inuyasha was so done and tired that he gave up resisting when his brother started licking his ears again.

Rin had watched them with a big smile. And Inuyasha tried to disguise his embarrassment, instead pretending to be annoyed.

"Did he fall on his head? What's wrong with him?"

Rin giggled, retreating to take a seat at the desk.

"He protects you"

Inuyasha huffed
"Yes, I can see that. The question is, why? This bastard doesn't give a damn when he's awake."

Rin smiled, like he had told her the funniest story. And totally ignored it all.

"That barrier you created was pure yoki. And even a yokai would have had trouble maintaining it as long as you have Inuyasha-sama. You didn't even stop when you were on the verge of death. On the other hand, whatever you did saved Sesshomaru. He's always gotten better. And while he might be stable, only his base instincts are concious. And those tell him to protect you"

Inuyasha huffed, but kept staring at the ceiling.

Bastard.

Doesn't explain why he is protecting him, when usually he was the one doing the harm. Inuyasha would think about it another time.

Inuyasha knew damn well, that fighting your base instincts was like running against a rock or trying to move a mountain. So he kept still and waited. He didn’t have to wait long and Sesshomaru fell back asleep and Inuyasha wiggled out bit by bit.

While slowly wiggling out from under Sesshomaru's chest, he asked:
"Where's the rest?"

"Outside. Sesshomaru doesn't tolerate them in here."

A quick look at the door and he understood that Sesshomaru had control over his poison whip again. And going by the slashes on the walls and door, not hesitant to use them either.

Inuyasha huffed.
Arm free, leg next.

"Not even his mother?"

"Especially not his mother."

Inuyasha halted. Especially NOT? Why the- no, no. Stop. This has nothing to do with me. Asshole is healing. My job is done. I can leave.

His legs free, he got up. Only for his world to tilt again. His legs felt heavy and tired. He ignored it all.

"How long have I been sleeping?"

"4 days"

Inuyasha tched. "What a waste of time"

Rin stayed quiet and that made Inuyasha alarmed. Rin stared at him. Eyes filled with tears. And for a short second. There at the desk, was the little girl. Long black hair. Missing front tooth. Sparkling, trusting eyes. And her genuine joy whenever she saw him.

"Inuyasha-sama!! Are you aware - that you both...- that I almost lost both of you?!"

Inuyasha's heart clenched for the woman in front of him. Rin had grown up in their hands. In Sesshomaru's, one of the strongest dai yokai around. Life and death were like a round of shogi for them. It meant nothing in the face of immortality. And sometimes Inuyasha forgot. Rin was human

While they fought and killed, saved and protected life on a whim. For Rin a lifetime meant 50 / maybe 60 years.

Watching people around them die belonged to their lives. For humans, their lives were short, their time with each other even shorter and the end always too close.

Inuyasha hand flinched up instinctively. As if to pull the little girl into his arms. But in front of him was not the little girl anymore.

Rin was a grown ass woman and he might have been older but hanyous aged slower which made her somehow younger and older at the same time. Which was weird. Because he was all for respecting your elders but also all for children to children table.

She reminded him of Kaede, old and wrinkly. But at the same time, she could be 100 and look like a raisin, she would for ever be the toothless kid with shimmering eyes. And Inuyasha didn't know how to handle all this weirdness.

But just in time, his stomach growled like a landslide that announced itself and Rin hiccuped one last time before she fell into a loud belly laugh. Inuyasha just kept scratching at his itching shoulder.

Rin offered to call for a servant, but Inuyasha declined. His legs fell stiff and heavy. Unused to the long rest. So they walked out the door.

And Inuyasha should have made a bet - right in front of the door was Kazuha. Stressed out to the core, if he went by the greasy, unkempt hair, the dark undereye bag,s and the chair she had placed right in the corridor.

She flinched out of her seat when she heard the door, and Inuyasha could see her brain start to process. Until she gasped and realised it was him.

She reached for him "i-inuyasha what..-?"

He took two steps back, Rin pulled behind his back. He didn't know why. But he doesn't want her to touch him, Rin, and especially, he doesn't want her close to Sesshomaru. The thought of touching him gave him shivers.

He still didn’t trust her and apparently his yokai agreed as an uncontrolled growl pressed out of his throat.

Kazuha took two steps away as well, hands raised and unsure.

"Inuyasha what did you do? What happened in there?" Hands still raised.

"Your job" He jabbed as his demon started to roar in his head. Begging for her blood. Begging for her head.

Kazuha saw and heard the aggression; she hesitated, looked at Rin but decided to listen. At no point in time, did she turn her back to him or make sudden movements. Smart. She knew he was about to rip her apart if she even thought of pulling something strange. And the yokai in his head started to calm.

Kikyo had pinned him to a tree for 50 years. Kagome had chosen a life without him. But both woman had a reason and would they have reached out, he would have taken their hand again and again. Because he could trust both of them to be good. But Kazuha...

Kazuha had destroyed him. She had burned down their home and then left him right there. Lungs filled with ash and smoke. Eyes burning so much he couldn't even open them anymore. But he could smell it, the blood the body. Everything had burned down that night. And he had wished so often that he would have been victim of the closing in flames too.

So yeah, he didn’t trust her.
And he wouldn't ever again, but she was not here for him and Inuyasha would leave soon anyway.

For now he was still hungry! So he pulled Rin through the corridors like he knew where the damn kitchen was - only to realise he didn't.

The servants in the kitchen were shocked to see someone standing in the kitchen and just froze. Inuyasha in his typical manners set down and told them to hurry with the food.

The kitchen broke out in chaos and Inuyasha felt replenished shortly after. The table was filled with plates. Not accustomed to a hanyous taste palette, they had probably thought it wouldn't differ too much from that of a yokai. The dishes looked good. But for Inuyasha the stench of lesser yokai meat smelled rotten and he had never understood the practice of eating it.

Not that he never tried it. Hunger that made you go blind and nose-deaf, made you even swallow stones.

Back then, days before Nari, before he could have cared for himself. He didn't remember much. Only how he had been so hungry he had bitten into the demon. And then absolute misery for day after day.
He had never touched it again

But he much preferred the human dishes that were spread out in front of Rin. So he didn't even hesitate to poke his chopsticks into her plate.

Rin was happy to share, the little tanuki chef on the other hand looked deeply hurt and was about to cry because of Inuyasha's disregard of his dishes and got right back to work to prepare more human dishes.

Inuyasha always ate fast and he was known for his impatience. So as soon as he finished, he left Rin behind and went to the garden.

When his feet touched the grass, and the sky shone in its brightest blue above his head - all the weight from his body just lifted.
The rustling leaves, the slight breeze and the singing birds in the distance.

He had missed it. He had never been so detached from nature before. Never slept in a bed for more than 2 days- not because he couldn't but because he preferred to sleep outside.

Standing there in the garden even if it was restricted by walls, felt like unfurling his body. Like he had been sleeping in a shiny box with not enough space for his body.

He would check one last time on the bastard up there, and then he had to go back. He needed to return to his place. Whatever else was going on here, he had no need to meddle. Sesshomaru could do it himself.

He sits there until the sun settles. Just watching the wind breeze through the trees and drawing circles into the grass. He had missed it so damn much

Before going back into his brother's room, he could already feel him being awake.

So when he enters and golden eyes stare back at him, he isn't surprised or taken aback.

Sesshomaru sits there on his bed, leaning against the wall. Serene and aloof. Like he hadn't been on the verge of death a few days ago.

He had looked at him, when he had woken up before, his color had returned to his face, the undereye bags were gone and the cheeks had filled back in.

But it had been a long time since Sesshomaru and him had looked each other in the eyes. Clear and conscious eyes.

Sharp like always.

The room had stilled and Inuyasha didn't know how to act. But when in doubt - do what you always do. In Inuyasha's case that was spit and curse. So just as he was about to throw something at Sesshomaru's head, the bastard dared to ask

"Are you well?"

Was this some kind of joke? "Tch, I wasn't the one dying, asshole"

"Still this one, feels your yoki weak and unstable"

"Fuck you asshole, that's not for you to worry about!"

"You should have run"

"Yeah well, sorry for not letting you die." Inuyasha grabbed Tessaiga from the wall and turned to leave.

Silence. Then:
"Coward, you are running away"

Now shivering in anger, Inuyasha let go of the door and turned.

"I am not running away, you fuck head. Rin asked me to help. And I did. And I did it for her. But you don't know what i had to do to save your sorry ass from hell. So don't act all aloof."

"This one told you to run."

"Sorry saving your dying ass anyway. Should have left you rot away. I am done here."

Inuyasha turned away to leave.

He hadn't expected gratitude in the first place, but ... honestly he hadn't expected anything, but this felt shit anyway.

He didn't get far. Sesshomaru, one second on the bed, the next behind him, grabbing his shoulder, turning him around and pinning him against the wall in a blink - was standing waaaay to close.

Inuyasha felt his breath on his face and shiver crawling down his spine. Like a million tiny ants, that left a burning sensation. The itch on his shoulder flared up. Somehow it felt like a bruise. It hurt, but you kept poking it because of the strange nerve flaring up around it.

Damn it! It hadn't healed! Why? Why? Why?!

" This one told you to run, instead you let me bite into your shoulder and mark you. You should have run, now you can't. You fell right into her trap"

For someone so close to death, only a few days ago the bastard was pretty strong, and for someone cuddling up to him just hours ago inuyasha really thought 'asshole needs to makr up his mind'.

Pissed, inuyasha tried to push the man off, but his yoki hadn't returned to it's full strenght and his yokai was strangly reluctant to leave either.

He kept pushing Sesshomaru away. "Watch me then! Nothing of what you say makes sense anyway! Whose trap? What mark? "

All wounds on his body had vanished, except for the bite, which kept itching but since it didn't hurt Inuyasha had paid it no mind.

"Do you not understand the significance of a shoulder bite?"

Sesshomaru looked well... not angry, rather annoyed and done with him. Inuyasha had never seen that expression. Sesshomaru in his memories, came in two forms. Uninterested and cold or in murder attempt.

Inuyasha kept staring at him, saving every detail of his expression and Sesshomaru seemed to think that Inuyasha calmed down enough to let him go, but not to step back.

Inuyasha used that to push his brother back and create some distance between them.

"Who would have taught me? Our dead father? You? Between all the times you tried to get rid of me?"

Inuyasha wanted to give him hell and throw insult after insult at that bastard. But Sesshomaru had put back his cold mask and interrupted.

And even before Sesshomaru said it, dread had already soared into his body like an all-drowning weight.

He wanted to cover his ears, wanted to run, but something in Sesshomarus's eyes, something he had never seen before, pain?- kept him right there.

His ears started ringing, and breathing suddenly hurt; he stumbled back right into the door like he could just vanish through it and escape this.

Sesshomaru opened his mouth like he had to force the words out. Somehow nervous while still looking like a damn portrait.

Don't say it! Dont say it

“A mating bite,” he said. “I marked you as my mate"

No. No noooo

Chapter Text

Drops Of Chaos

Inuyasha screamed at him.

Grabbing Sesshomaru by his kimono and shaking him was something unimaginable two incenses ago. Now it wasn’t even the weirdest thing. Weirder was Sesshomaru actually letting him shake him—and still being alive. Almost weirder than marking your brother. Almost.

And then the word “irreversible” reached his head, and he stilled.

“What do you mean, irreversible?”
Calm. Controlled.

Sesshomaru looked at him like he was stupid.

Inuyasha pushed him back by the chest.

“I know what irreversible means, you shithead! What does it mean for me? What does it change?”

“You will have to stay at my side.”

Inuyasha clicked his tongue, gripping his hair like he could pull the madness out of his skull. He wiped his face in exhaustion.

“How did Father leave your mother so quickly, then?”

“They weren’t mated. Their bond was arranged. Bonds like this are rare—and powerful.”

Inuyasha didn’t understand shit.

“What happens if we part?”

“This one will perish.”

Inuyasha halted his pacing and looked at Sesshomaru. The man stood there like a damn portrait, as if almost dying was his favorite pastime.

Inuyasha, on the other hand, felt a hand grip around his heart, squeezing relentlessly. He couldn't even describe what he felt.

But damn it—he hadn’t saved the asshole just for him to die right after. But staying wasn’t an option either.

Inuyasha let his hand fall back to his side, looked up at the ceiling, exhaled loudly, and faced Sesshomaru.

“What do you expect me to do? Give up my life to save you? Again? When all my life the easiest death was crossing paths with you? When all my life I was worth nothing to you?”

Inuyasha turned to the door and pushed it open.

“You don't get to do that to me. Find a way.”

He didn't really remember the way to the garden, but when he reached it, he jumped into the oldest and highest tree he could find.

And to make it even worse, the sky opened its gates and heavy rain poured down. The drops were heavy, cold, and unforgiving. He was drenched immediately.

Inuyasha didn't feel the cold, nor did he hear the sky roaring and lightning up. He tried imagining it: staying here. He couldn't.

So he kept sitting there—blank and cold and shivering. He hadn’t heard any steps, nor smelled anything before Sesshomaru stood under the tree, looking up at him.

Inuyasha found it alarming how his instincts had let that bastard get so close without warning, as if he weren’t a threat at all.

“Return or you will perish faster than this one.”

Inuyasha wanted to claw his own face out. Wanted to chop off Sesshomaru's head and shove it up his ass. But Inuyasha really didn’t want to see his face, so he didn’t react. Ignored him.

“The servants prepared a hot bath. Tomorrow you can leave whenever you want.”

Inuyasha didn't really remember how he got to the bathroom or how he was suddenly shoulder-deep in hot water, undressed and alone.

But as his body relaxed into the steaming water, the words echoed in his head:

“Tomorrow you can leave whenever you want.”

Sesshomaru had given up. He had no hope that Inuyasha would stay.

Like his body had made up its own mind, Inuyasha called, “Sesshomaru.”

And to his surprise—Sesshomaru actually came into the bath and stared at Inuyasha’s back.

“Why me?”

“I don’t know,” came the very honest-sounding answer. “But you are right. You don't owe me.”

Inuyasha turned to him in surprise. Sesshomaru still looked cold and expressionless. But he meant it.

“Tch. And what? I'm just gonna let you die?”

“It already started.”
Sesshomaru looked down at his right hand. Black veins pulsed under his skin—just like he had been poisoned all over again.

Surprised, Inuyasha almost jerked out of the tub. His heart dropped into his stomach. Only his embarrassment kept his lower body submerged.

“I didn't go far!”

No. But I can feel your rejection. And that's enough.

Inuyasha huffed, fell back into the tub, and stared at the ceiling in exhaustion. Guilt had swallowed him whole.

“Anything I can do?”

“Touch.”

“…All right.”

Inuyasha didn't know what he had expected. A pat on his head? A hand on his shoulder? Sesshomaru grabbing his arm? Anything but…

Never, in a thousand years, would he have thought that Sesshomaru would kneel behind him and start untangling his hair with his claws.

The shivers ran down his spine, and his lids felt like he was trying to lift the world. So he surrendered. Closed his eyes.

But his calm exterior was like water to the roaring fire in his head—all-consuming, uncontrollable, devastating. His thoughts raced too fast to catch, unfinished and unhinged. He couldn’t make sense of them—like standing in the eye of the storm—completely captive, too exhausted to fight, too tired to hide.

In the middle of all that chaos, a memory popped up.

He was sitting in his mother’s lap, drawing with utmost concentration, and behind him, his mother combing his hair. She was using his art as a distraction to finally comb it properly, while her whirlwind of a son was occupied. She hummed a melody.

He proudly presented a portrait of the two of them. It was awful.

With confidence, he used to draw his suns with bold stripes on the cheeks, like his father had them, like his brother. Yes. In his mind, it made the sun look so much cooler, so much stronger. He was a great artist, and when he grew up, he would be even better. Hundreds of years later, and he would still draw. No line straight. No circle round.

His mother had always enjoyed his drawings anyway, but when she saw that one… her soft smile turned sad. She asked, “Why do you never draw your ears, my love?”

Inuyasha had avoided her eyes.

“If I didn’t have them... we could live in peace. The elders wouldn't treat you like this. We could be happy. The kids would play ball with me.”

He had never understood her gaze back then—her tear-filled eyes that mirrored her breaking heart. She had hugged him, kissed his head, and said:

“I am happy. All I need is you. And your ears—they are your father’s legacy. He loved you even more. You should be proud of them. They are part of you. And one day, when you are big and strong, no one will care about them anymore.”

Inuyasha hadn’t really believed her back then, and he didn't believe it now. No human and no yōkai ever considered him equal. At the end… everyone cared about them.

And if his father had loved him so much… why were they living here? Why did her own family treat them like dirt? Why did his brother never show up? Why was no one ever looking out for them?

She had combed his hair for the last time that day. She died shortly after.

So yes, Inuyasha enjoyed the silent, warm feeling blooming in his stomach—until Sesshomaru came too close to his neck. And his instincts shocked him out of the memory with an electric jolt. He grabbed Sesshomaru’s wrist before he could touch it.

Inuyasha was not naïve enough to forget that the man behind him—combing his hair, letting him soak in a tub—was also the same bastard who could decapitate him in a heartbeat.

“Trying to get rid of me before it kills you first?”

Inuyasha spat out, cold and calm. He hadn't turned, but all his muscles tensed, ready for the next betrayal.

Sesshomaru looked at him like he had gone mad.

“Do you not understand the concept of a bond, Inuyasha?”

It was the first time he had said his name without real heat. “If you die, I die. If you reject me, I die. If you suffer, I suffer a hundred times more.”

Inuyasha let go. Wow. Bastard knows more than two words.

“Calm down, asshole. Not like I know what it's like,”

he said, filling his hands with water and splashing it on his face to rub it. The heat melted the tension away. The awkwardness stayed.

“Like rejecting the air you need to breathe. All in me screams to just complete the bond.”

And Inuyasha’s breath hitched. In shock he turned to Sesshomaru, ready to throw the man off if needed. But Sesshomaru’s eyes showed something he had never seen before: vulnerability.

Inuyasha just kept staring. He had raised his hands in defense, but Sesshomaru looked so damn… soft?! Inuyasha’s head couldn't process. So when the black-veined hand reached out, he didn't flinch away. Couldn't. All his senses zeroed in on his brother.

“Stay.”

An order. And the heavy soap smell must have gotten to his head, drugged him, because usually he would have told Sesshomaru where to shove his orders. He wanted to spit out a “fuck you,” but instead Inuyasha took the extended hand—like his mind and body were not one.

He was sure he would regret it. But for now… could he not enjoy—accept this?

Inuyasha stared at their hands: Sesshomaru’s long, thin fingers, the sharp nails, cold to the touch, weirdly soft. He couldn't say what exactly, but… he liked it.

As Inuyasha stepped out of the tub, water swept over the corner with a loud splash. Dazed, Inuyasha stood there, senses blurred and covered in fog—until he saw the damn bastard’s gaze switch. From slightly dazed and unfocused—to cold anger.

Sesshomaru let go, like he got burned, turned around in disgust—and the weird moment snapped away. The water drops on Inuyasha’s body suddenly felt like sand: heavy, dirty. It felt like a slap. Warm, heat, then extending, pulsing pain.

There it is, he thought. The bastard he knows. Not the brain-hazed man driven by a need to complete the bond. The one he had idolized so much as a child—the only family left—the one that always looked at him like dirt beneath his nails. How could he have thought… stupid. When the fuck would he finally learn?! No good things came to someone like him. Shame bled into every fiber of his body and Inuyasha turned away to grab his clothes.

He put them on in record time, ignoring the teeth-grinding and anger radiating from the other side of the room. He needed to leave.

“Stop.”

He ignored it and crossed the room—but the asshole followed and grabbed him by the arm. Inuyasha, putting all his embarrassment into it, turned and rammed his fist into Sesshomaru’s face.

“Don't touch me,”

he growled in fury.

Sesshomaru tumbled down, grunted, and gripped his hand where the veins spread up to his elbow, shimmering in a weirdly beautiful gold as they reached out like licking flames. The curse of the bond.

“If you suffer, I suffer a hundred times more.”

Inuyasha wished it to be a thousand.

Chapter Text

Title: Under My Skin

The corridor is packed with guards—probably called in by his screaming.

At the end stand the damn queen and Kazuha. They look confused, like they weren’t sure whether to attack or stay back. Inuyasha gladly helps them out, makes their decision. He yanks Tessaiga free and slams it into the ground.

“Wind Scar!”

The blade cleaves through stone and silence alike, a deafening crack tearing the air. His vision flickers—black at the edges—but he shoves it back, too furious to stop. Another Wind Scar arcs across the hall.

He doesn’t register the screaming guards, the crumbling walls, or even Sesshomaru behind him. His hands shiver. He is beyond pissed, and he’s not hiding it.

The bastard’s mother lifts an eyebrow. That’s it. Unimpressed. Like he hadn’t just torn this palace wing in half. Kazuha’s hauled back by haori, and Inuyasha’s rage surges. He wants to throw a third Wind Scar. Right into their smug faces.

But maybe—maybe he shouldn’t have ignored the dizziness.

He doesn’t even get to raise the blade.

The black at the edge of his vision spills inward. His ears burn. His limbs frost over. His hands are stone. His legs don’t listen.

“Damn it—shhhit…” he slurs.

Tessaiga hits the ground with a sickening clank. He follows.

Through the blur, he sees white sleeves.

Feels arms catch him.

Sesshomaru.

And damn it, he wishes he’d hit the floor instead. A cracked skull sounded so much less stressful than falling into his arms.

"Don't touch me..." he wants to growl. Wants to claw free.

But his body’s done listening.

His fists stay clenched even as his knees buckle. The last thing he registers is Sesshomaru’s grip—cold, steady, relentless.

Unwanted.

He'd been running on empty for days, maybe longer. Ever since the new moon, he hadn’t had a single quiet moment. From one catastrophe to another. Of course this would be how it ends.

He gets swallowed by the dark.

---

The nothingness is clean. Still.

For the first time, his head is silent. No noise. No thoughts. Just floating.

Time passes—or maybe doesn’t. There’s no sense of it here.

But then: a flicker.

A red light, fluttering in the distance.

And suddenly he’s there—in the Red Room.

Inu. Yes—that’s what he’s decided to call his demon. Mind your own business, thank you very much.

Small, thin, curled on the floor like a kid too scared to breathe.

Inu doesn’t snarl at him like usual. Doesn’t even move. Just looks up, eyes wide and wet and quietly miserable.

When Inuyasha reaches out, the little body shivers—ice-cold to the touch.

Only then does Inuyasha get it.

Why the silence in his head had been so total.
How close he had come to dying. Inu had given his all to save Sesshomaru, but no one had cared when he had been left to misery. Not even Inuyasha himself had realized how much his yokai had sacrificed.

A memory rises: frostbitten nights, small hands, endless fear. The child he used to be. And suddenly the guilt of not caring about his own yokai is eating him alive.

He doesn’t hesitate.

He lies down next to the yokai, pulls him close, and cradles him.

Like he always wished someone had done for him. The yokai doesn’t react, doesn’t even open his eyes, just wiggles deeper into Inuyasha’s warmth and Inuyasha is a bit shaken by the calm behavior. And no, he doesn’t prefer this over wild feral Inu—because at least wild and feral meant healthy. This, right here, meant absolute enervation. Inu nuzzles under his jaw, relaxing for the first time. Only when the tiny body’s breath evens out does Inuyasha realize how damn quiet the room is.

The room is... strange. Unnatural. The usually red, roaring, and crackling flames are barely flickering. The flames look pale. Weak. As if Inuyasha could stomp them out with his bare feet.

But what sets Inuyasha’s instincts off is the sound. Or more so—the missing sound. Usually the flames roar and Inu snarls at him. There was always some kind of sound. This time? Nothing. Inuyasha follows the strange urge to scream. He feels his vocal cords strain but the sound gets swallowed by nothingness. Doesn’t echo, but leaves his throat aching. Inuyasha knew it. Something was reaaaally wrong. And if Inu hadn’t been trying to crawl into Inuyasha’s skin for warmth, he would’ve gotten up. Pity and sympathy let him remain still. And what remained was staring into the pathetic flames until his own eyes fluttered closed.

The next time he gets up, he feels like a horde of gnomes had trampled over him. As his senses return—or at least his brain—panic kicks in. Inu is gone and he gets up in panic. Bones cracking (not that he can hear it—but he sure as hell feels it!) and all, he looks around for the yokai.

Inu sits in a corner, crouched and arms around his knees. He is still shaking and stares at Inuyasha in distrust and caution, not letting him out of his sight. Inuyasha sighs. Yeah, he gets it. Inuyasha wouldn’t trust him either if their roles were switched.

Inu sits next to a warmly pulsing white... orb? It feels familiar but Inuyasha couldn’t quite put his finger on how or why, so he ignores it. Some problems are just meant to be dealt with "later."

Inuyasha gets up and gets closer. Inu snarls at him. Warning—but too weak to hide the fear and distrust—so he tries to scoot away.

Inuyasha just sits in front of the orb, poking it, to find out if it’s solid or translucent. It’s somehow both. Inuyasha can touch it but at the same time he’s pretty sure it’s not solid material but heavy... light? It feels wet and has no smell. It pulses in a way too familiar pattern—but he doesn’t wanna think about it. Inuyasha is weirded out by the feeling and scrunches his nose in disgust. And apparently, that is funny enough to make Inu laugh and poke the ball... orb too. It bounces in his direction and something about it makes a memory flash before his eyes.

His mother was out and he had sat there in the garden. There were other children too. They were playing with the ball, kicking it around, laughing and joking. Inuyasha wanted to join so bad. And when the ball bounced in front of his feet, he kicked it too. Laughing and running after it as well. But suddenly he stood there alone. The kids had stared at him in disgust. In fear. Inuyasha had never again tried to play with them.

He had returned to watching them from the window, in his mother’s room. And when his mother asked him why he never tried to join, he smiled and said that he would rather spend his time with her. Mother had smiled at him. She had been so beautiful that day—somehow sparkling. Happy that her son wasn’t sad, he kept avoiding the children. Only now, older and wiser, did he understand that the sparkling came from her pearl-like tears that decorated that smile. So filled with pain, so heavy on the tongue that no sound could leave.

So in an instant, he got up and kicked the ball to the still-crouching Inu.

Inuyasha hesistes but then stands up.

Kicks the orb — gently — toward Inu.

The kid flinches, confused. Watches it roll to a stop.

Then, slowly, he kicks it back.

They play. They have no concept of time, so they play until they can’t anymore. Exhausted, they lie down. Laughing and breathing heavy, he thinks how ironic it is that he almost had to die to play ball with someone. With himself, at the end of the day—but no need to be so nit-picky about the details.

He doesn’t remember the last time he had so much fun without being cautious of everything. So he closes his eyes and enjoys the tingling feeling of contentment. It gets darker in front of his eyes and when he opens them Inu is crouched over him, carefully caressing his head in search of something. And as he grabs his own Inu ears, Inuyasha laughs. Yeah, hahaha keep searching, he says without sound. He pulls his hair to the side and shows him his human ears instead. Inu grabs them in wonder and Inuyasha lets him.

Doesn’t even say anything when Inu puts both index fingers into his mouth to part his lips in search of his fangs. He understands—Inu is in search of claws, fangs and fluffy ears. Inuyasha is bared of all, because at his weakest, he is only human. Inuyasha had realized it when he had woken up but ignored it. Just like the fact that they were both child-sized and tiny. No idea why they were in the Red Room in the first place. How would he know why they had to turn into kids then?

He swats Inu’s finger out of his mouth and touches Inu’s cheeks instead. Inuyasha grins—his turn to grope the other.

The only real difference were the markings. While his father’s marks were blue, the asshole’s violet, Inu’s were bright red. One mark on every cheek. Inuyasha reached to trace and Inu nuzzled into his hand, confused but not hostile. These marks made Inu part of the family that he was never allowed to join.

Inu, on the other hand, had grabbed his hand and played with his clawless hand, unaware of the comfort he gave.

Inuyasha and Inu kept playing with the orb—kicking it, throwing it, racing each other. As they grew—day by day, or maybe weeks, months, hours (how would they know?)—so did the orb. Inuyasha couldn’t ignore the bastard’s presence anymore. The pulses got stronger and stronger until he felt like he was breathing him. So Inuyasha developed a strong aversion to touching it, and if Inu realized, he never pressed. While Inuyasha tried to stay as far away as possible, Inu sometimes just sat right next to it, bathing in the warm but strong yoki.

As Inuyasha’s bones stopped cracking with every move and Inu’s complexion lost that gray, unhealthy tone, they grew older. Stronger. But so did the room. Flames surged over their heads—fire tongues more often than not reaching for them. Bright red. Strong. Not burning, though. Inuyasha knew it was time before it even happened.

The first time it happens, Inuyasha naps on one side of the room, while Inu bathes in Sesshomaru’s yoki. The orb pulses so strong, the room shakes and returns sound. Inuyasha shoots up, heart pounding. The flames had returned—and with them, the bastard’s voice. Amid the return of the roaring flames and Inu’s and his own synchronized heartbeat,

One word, clear as day, lets him freeze.

"Return."

Inu jolts upright, ears twitching toward the flame. He looks at Inuyasha—confused, almost pleading. Like returning would be the water to all these flames.

But Inuyasha really, really doesn’t want to.

Out there, things were waiting for him. Things he couldn’t control nor solve. The bond. The bastard. Home... himself.

Returning would mean no escape—but more importantly, it meant leaving Inu behind again.

So Inuyasha gets up and strides toward Inu. The yokai points at the orb.

"Hooo-me," he pushes out in a barely human growl.

Inuyasha’s heart breaks. For Inu, Sesshomaru was family. Safe. Home. For Inuyasha, it was the biggest threat. Sesshomaru was safe until the bond lasted. But they wouldn’t get hurt. Not again. This time, Inuyasha knew where he belonged—and it was not at that bastard’s side.

Inuyasha grabbed the hand that was pointing at the orb and pulled Inu into his arms. Inu let it happen, held him, and only said, "Hm?" Inuyasha wouldn’t let him be lonely anymore. If they were one—They would leave as one.

It feels like being pushed through a tube that was only meant for one bag of bones, but Inuyasha holds Inu close not sure where he ends and where the other starts. And then everything fades away.

He doesn’t know how much time later, but everything just snaps back. Sounds and smells drown his senses. And Inuyasha feels a ringing in his ears, before everything shifts to 'normal.'

Inuyasha wakes up to a brother that straddles his body and is holding his hands above his head, pressed to the mattress. The man snarls at him,

"Take control, push it back."

And only then does Inuyasha realize the difference. His body feels... tighter? Like he finally filled it. It feels hotter. Something is sizzling under his skin and his senses are even sharper. He can listen in on the guard near the gates, can smell Rin somewhere in the garden. He can feel the added strength, he usually only feels when his yokai takes over.

But he is conscious. And he feels Inu like he feels himself. Usually, it feels like having another person at your side—now it feels like they are one. Like human and yokai Inuyasha were finally fitting into each other without a fight over control and dominance. They just fit.

No wonder Sesshomaru is snarling at him. The man probably thinks he’s losing control. And Inuyasha, even when a bit lightheaded, can see the flickering panic in his brother’s eyes.

Hm... what to do with that? he asks himself.

"Calm down, take control!"

Sesshomaru snarls—but it weirdly sounds more like a plea than an order. Inuyasha pushes him off with a power he can't quite estimate.

"How about you calm the fuck down."

So Sesshomaru crashes into a wall, leaves a nice demon-shaped dent in it, and stares at Inuyasha—speechless. Inuyasha gets up and as his toes touch the cold ground, he feels them tingle. How long has it been? How long was he out?

Going by the smell in the room, multiple days—but he feels so damn good. Like he slept off his exhaustion. Like he was fed and warm.

Not minding the cracking wall sounds or Sesshomaru’s cussing.

"Inuyasha?"

And Inuyasha really wants to throw anger and sarcasm at him—but Sesshomaru looks like shit. Dark eyes. Unkempt hair and clothes. And Inuyasha knew that was not normal. Sesshomaru, even in a fight, was clean, pristine, and put together.

"... you are back."

The man looks relieved. And Inuyasha doesn’t know how to deal with that, so he just nods.

Sesshomaru breathes heavy and deep, his hands shivering like he is not in control. He steps closer and Inuyasha wants to step away. But something tells him that Sesshomaru right now is no threat. And when he gets pulled in and surrounded by the now-familiar scent, listens to the erratic heartbeat and somehow feels the panicked yoki—Sesshomaru is not hugging him.

He’s not hugging him. He’s holding on. Desperate, breath shallow, face buried at his neck—like he’s trying to make sure the warmth is real.

Inuyasha hears it: his brother’s heartbeat, frantic. Feels it in the hands that shake against his back. Smells the panic in his scent, raw and sharp and wrong.

Maybe it’s the bond. Maybe it’s instinct. Doesn’t matter.

He lets it happen, doesn’t pull away.

He might not trust Sesshomaru.

But he’s not afraid of being held anymore.