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Language:
English
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Published:
2025-01-09
Updated:
2025-01-09
Words:
880
Chapters:
2/?
Comments:
23
Kudos:
59
Hits:
598

Clicking Together

Summary:

A oneshot book for my new AU: Matchmaker Puzzles! Basically where he somehow makes ships canon through his parodies.

Chapter 1: Introduction!

Chapter Text

Hello hello hello, ladies, gents and those outside the gender binary! Welcome to a new project I'm starting to hopefully occupy my brain away from life in general: A Matchmaker Puzzles oneshot book!

Here's a simple rundown of the AU: Instead of torturing the SMG4 crew in terrible parodies of popular shows, Mr. Puzzles decides he wants to do us(the viewers) a favor by making our favorite ships canon in small episodes!! He doesn't care who is paired with who, so long as it gets him high ratings!

Feel free to leave a request for a ship in the comments, and I'll choose one to write a oneshot first after the prologue :D

Chapter 2: Prologue

Summary:

The beginning.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The castle was engulfed in darkness. The crew could barely see through the empty void that had surrounded them, and they couldn't seem to place their feet on solid ground. They all flailed around in a panic, clinging blindly to each other and bumping around. SMG4 grabbed something stable and ended up bumping heads with SMG3. Bob and Boopkins held tight to each other, with the fish burrowing himself into Bob’s cloak while Bob shielded him. Tari and Meggy were in a slap fight, while Mario just hung on to Saiko’s leg and wouldn't let go as she tried to kick him off. It was utter chaos.

Suddenly, the lights flashed on, and the crew was blinded as they found themselves floating in a vast, open space surrounded by TVs, displaying various channels on their screens, some which even included some members of the crew. The crew quickly froze up and fixed their positions as they looked around, and Four groaned. “Oh great, what now?! Where the hell are we?” He exclaimed in frustration, and Three stared at the screens in confusion. “This is creepy as hell...” He muttered, and Tari glanced around before noticing a larger tv just a few yards away from them, displaying static. “Uh, guys?” She pointed at the television nervously as it began to grow limbs, the screen switching from static to a wide colorbar grin. His outfit was a fancy suit and suspenders, and despite the dull red color palette, he had bright red heart charms on his hat and bowtie. Despite his intimidating size, he seemed polite... Enough.

“Hello, my superstars!” The stranger exclaimed, waving his hands enthusiastically as he stared at the crew. “Don't you all look stunning! Worry not, I will cause you no harm!” He bowed front towards the crew, the TVs around them flickering off as they all floated in confusion. They expected this guy to be a threat, but he was... Strangely nice?

“Who- Who are you?” Tari asked nervously, kicking her legs around in fear. Puzzles’ grin widened. “I'm Mr. Puzzles, but you can call me your matchmaker!” He exclaimed, raising his arms high in the air as a cheery and unsettling expression settled on his screen. The crew simultaneously felt a cold shiver run down their spines at his words. “M-Matchmaker?” Meggy asked, tilting her head in confusion. Puzzles nodded and proceeded to explain.

“Of course! I've decided to do a bit of snooping into your channel’s fanbase, and found that so many people want romance and drama!” Puzzles exclaimed, pointing at SMG4 before turning around to face away from the crew. “So, I had an idea, much different from what I was initially planning; What if instead of making these silly parodies for my 5 stars, I granted your fans what they've been desiring?” He grinned widely at the group as he scanned them intently. “I can see it... Many potential pairings here!”

“Sicko! You can't just put two people in a room and expect them to get along like that! You ain't Cupid!” Three yelled angrily, pointing an accusatory finger at Puzzles. The rest of the crew was unnerved. “And besides, What are you gonna do about Boopkins! He's a child!” Meggy exclaimed and Puzzles waved a hand dismissively. “He's not generally supposed to be here. I might just throw him into a vocaloid concert or something.”

Boopkins suddenly chimed up cheerfully. “Really?!” Bob smacked him. “Dude, focus!” He yelled, and Puzzles ignored the interruption and continued. “And besides, you won't remember any of the interactions anyhow if you manage to make it out! It'll be like nothing happened.” Puzzles hummed calmly, snapping his fingers as holographic hands reached out from the TV screens and grabbed the group in pairs. “Ah- Before I forget!”

Puzzles suddenly reached through a TV screen near him and pulled out a squirming pair of guardians, with SMG1 and SMG2 writhing in his grip as he tossed SMG1 into a different TV. “We need a few more actors.”

The hands holding the crew suddenly retreated, dragging away the pairs they grabbed with them as they disappeared screaming. Only SMG2, Boopkins and Mario remained in the void with Puzzles, and he quickly grabbed the rest of them and floated a bit before turning towards an older model of television. “As for you lot, you can go ahead and chill around in the older channels. Have fun!”

He forced them through the screen’s static before pulling his hand back out empty, and he burst into maniacal laughter.

Finally.

He was going to get the fame he deserved.

Notes:

Tune in next time for our next episode: Coffee and Editors!