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Gollum hadn’t meant to fall in love. It just happened one day, when he snuck out of the depths of Isengard and into the world of the tall people. He had found a stick and suddenly found himself surrounded by tall folk. It was much different than Middle Earth. Tall hobbits in long cloaks rushed through the streets. If he could read, he would see the signs indicating he was in Diagon Alley, but he couldn’t, so he didn’t know he had slipped into Knockturn Alley until he was lost.
He was searching for a place to hide when a large man struck him with a cane. “Elf!” he shouted, “carry my bag”
Gollum was nearly crushed by a large bag, but he immediately pushed it off. “Elveses, precious?” he cried. “Stupid hobbitses, take your stinking bags”
The man scoffed. “Is this how you treat your master? Should I give you clothes?”
Gollum shrieked, insulted that his garbs were not up to this tall hobbit’s high standards. He leapt at the man, but a strong hand held him back and the world squeezed in around him.
With a loud pop, the room changed from a dingy alley to an ornate room with a fireplace, chairs, and assortment of foods spread on a coffee table. Not that Gollum knew what coffee was, and he found the food rather disgusting. Nonetheless, he turned to his captor to see a small goblin.
“No!” he cried, shielding his face, “ don’t hurts us, precious! Please!”
His captor stepped back. He was short, about the same height as Gollum but with better posture and giant ears that peeked out through the layers of hats he was wearing. His large eyes widened.
“Dobby doesn’t mean to harm sir. Dobby just wants to save sir from evil wizards!”
Gollum peeked through his hands. “Wizards, precious? We keeps to ourselves, precious. Why are evil wizards after us?”
Dobby shook his head, hats wobbling. “Not after you, sir. Wizards are thinking you are a house elf! It is obvious to Dobby that you are not from these parts.”
Gollum gagged. “Stinking elveses! We hates them.”
Dobby’s eyes started to water. Despite not being emotionally intelligent, Gollum felt a sting of remorse. At first he thought it was hunger pain, but he knew it was something deeper. But he wasn’t going to apologize. He had just met this man. He could be another traitor like that filthy Bagginses. Never again.
Gollum slinked towards the food on the table. “Where has the goblin taken us, precious?”
“The Come-and-Go-Room, sir,” the other creature explained. “But Dobby is not a goblin. Dobby is a house-elf.”
Gollum stopped himself from retching this time in a rare attempt to not offend. “But elveses are evil, wretched beings. Why does this one rescue us?”
Dobby cast his eyes down, sending one of his hats (a red cowboy hat) to the floor. “Dobby thought that maybe, by saving him, Smeagol would notice Dobby.”
“Smeagol…” Gollum said to himself, “yes, that was our name once.” They locked eyes, pale orbs meeting green. Something had awoken in Gollum, or maybe he was Smeagol now. “I notice you, Dobby.”
Dobby blushed. “Perhaps Smeagol would like to dine with Dobby?” He asked, gesturing to the table laden with food.
“I would love that.” Smeagol smiled.
The two joined hands, spending the rest of the evening enjoying each other's company.