Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Nine days.

It had been nine days since she had been taken from him.

They said she was dangerous, but as far as he could tell, Nox was just trying to defend her little pillow fort. 

He knew she wasn't feeling well but didn't understand what was wrong. Usually, she would come to him if she was sick or injured, but it was apparent enough to him that she wasn't up to drills and just wanted space.

Being on house arrest, he had nothing but time to ruminate on that evening.

Things were fine. She was a little growly, but she accepted comfort from him. Things didn't turn bad until the handlers barged in to collect them. They saw her little fort and set to work dismantling and disparaging her for some… feline attributes he didn't understand.

That's when she took a swipe at them.

That's when they zapped her.

They threw her to the ground, and something in him snapped in a way he'd never felt before. His wings flared to life, fluffing and contorting at an odd angle as he rushed to her. Grappling with the handlers was one thing, but the second his feathers came into play, something smacked him upside the head, dazing him before the world went dark as his head hit the concrete beneath.

He came too just to see Nox desperately flailing as she was dragged off, screaming. He called after her, but the weight bearing down on him in harrowing stress points made it impossible.

They did, eventually, let him up. He shuffled to his feet as quickly as he could and rushed in hot pursuit, calling after Nox.

But he was too late.

The hydrologic steel door closed just as he reached it, and the servo engaged, locking her inside and separating him from her. He screamed, beat on the door, and threw himself at it until his voice broke and his body was bruised and spent. He used feathers to try and reach her, even to show her he was there.

But they thought of that, too.

Of course, they did.

They realized their folly right away. Hawks had shut down, his eyes constantly fixed on the room they dragged her to. He wasn't interested in eating. His free time was spent trying to call to her through that goddamn door. Anyone who attempted to interfere found his ire.

So, he was placed on house arrest and unable to leave the dorm.

The first two nights, he slept in her bed. The smell of her shampoo and perfume had saturated the pillow and comforter, and he took some kind of comfort from it.

He didn't know what was happening or why any more than she did, and it tore him up. It wasn't until Mera peeked in to assure him she would eventually return to him that he found that part of himself again. His energy took a 180, and he began meticulously cleaning their dorm.

It was a deep compulsion he couldn't control. It needed to be clean and sterile, and it needed to be comfortable , so he brought out all the extra blankets and pillows to offer Nox as many comfortable spots as possible upon her inevitable return.

Now, on day nine, nothing was left to occupy his anxious energy.

Hawks spent the evening staring at the ceiling, daydreaming about her return and upcoming birthday. He always tried to make the best of their situation for her, doing everything he could to make her feel seen and valued for who she was deep down - for every part of her.

In truth, he was addicted to her smile.

Not her snarky, cocky half-smirk.

Her small, soft, genuine smile.

It was a side of her no one else got to see. Something only he brought out of her made his chest swell with pride and… a feeling he didn't quite understand. All he knew was that he didn't want to share that smile with anyone else.

They had been close friends for years, yet now, he found himself appreciating her aesthetic. He enjoyed watching Nox - how she cooked, ate, groomed herself, and god, did he love watching her swim. He thought only tigers liked water longer than he cared to admit, only to find her quirk derived from a semi-aquatic species.

It was becoming a problem. He couldn't spar with her anymore. Recently, he found himself captivated by her and her raw power. Sure, that made them a great team - he was ranged support, and she was close-range power. For that reason, he always studied her movements carefully.

But this… this was different .

Suddenly, he found his heart skipping a beat whenever he caught a glance at her during training. The way she emerged from the water, the nictitating membrane retracting in her sapphire eyes as water cascaded off of her, made his stomach jump to his chest in what he presumed was the “butterflies” feeling people talked about. The way her eyes dilated before she went in for a strike made his breath hitch. And, of course, his personal favorite: the way her eyes crinkled in a long, lingering blink she only ever made when they made eye contact.

He didn't know why it was happening now, after the last eight years. Why, suddenly, he seemed to notice and become fascinated by things Nox did. Why did he feel compelled to give her little trinkets or fix flyaway hairs? Why would he do anything to make her smile?

The soft click of the front door pulled Hawks from his thoughts. He glanced at the clock; it was too late to be called to train. Maybe they were here to tell him he could resume training to keep him occupied tomorrow? There was nothing left to fuss over in their dorm.

But his door slowly opened, and, to his surprise, Nox trudged in. He shot upright, feathers fluffing. Usually, he'd be ecstatic to see her, but something was wrong. Very wrong. 

Her eyes were downcast and unfocused. Her gait was more heel-first and had a sway. Then, he saw the bandages around her abdomen. She looked utterly despondent and all but collapsed onto his bed, eyes lifeless and dissociated. Completely silent, making it beyond evident that they had broken her.

“Nox!” he exclaimed in his surprise, but she didn’t respond. Unsteady on her feet, she slowly stumbled forward until she was crawling into his bed. Wrapping herself around him, she quietly nuzzled into his chest, desperately seeking comfort in very much the same way she used to when they were children. His wings covered her instantly as his arms wrapped around her, pulling her close. “Kitten…”

(fanart by AvroChan)

Hawks was livid that they would keep her away from him for almost a week. He could only imagine the torment that she had been through during that time, with his only comfort being that the time in the dorms shouldn’t be forever. He held her tighter, cursing their handlers silent for the Hell she likely endured in solitary. He kept his cool to not upset her, opting to comfortingly run his hand along her back. 

He would find out what they did to her, one way or another. 

They were supposed to be on assignments with older agents and HPSC personnel to build rapport with the public before their debut. Nox, however, had been left out of that program, which would hinder her public relations. The only reason he hadn’t started was that he was irritable without her, but it slowly dawned on him what that meant, what her life had been like up until now.

More importantly, Nox needed him, and he wouldn’t leave for some time. When it came to the brass tax, her care always fell to him. The staff were afraid of her, even back then.

They didn’t get along, not at first. Truth be told, he was as terrified of her as they were. They always said she was dangerous; she was to be feared and never trusted. But when he saw her in the infirmary, lying on the floor and panting with bandages all over her body, something in him roared to life.

He stood between the research staff, who had been berating her for failing to meet some expectations about how far she could push herself. She was younger than he was, and they were just kids! He couldn’t sit idly by. His wings puffed and bent forward, shielding her behind him. His feathers were firm, sharp, and ready for battle. He screamed at them to stop, saying that she had had enough. 

His handler and Yokumiru were taken aback. He had never stood up to them quite like that and was defending Nox, of all people.

As they mumbled between themselves, Hawks knelt beside her, whispering soft platitudes. He had no idea she couldn’t understand the language well enough to appreciate his comforting words. Gathering her into his arms, he heard a rumble in her throat that was recognizable as a purr. A sharp, fast purr that felt urgent ; he thought purrs were supposed to be calming, but that just broke his heart.

And here she was, making that same damn purr.

Typically, Nox would purr a low, lazy rumble when seeking affection. But this was a distressed, nasally breath of a feline attempting to self-soothe. Her eyes at least drifted shut once she found a comfortable position - a sign of trust. He’d keep her safe from whatever shadows bothered her, just as he always had.

Whatever happened there, she no longer trusted her safety was guaranteed, which was a regression back to her earlier headspace. Whatever the hell happened, he’d figure it out. He’d talk to Yokumiru tomorrow; he would know what they had done to his partner.

For now, he’d hold her as long as she needed.

Hawks continued lightly stroking her back, fingers tracing her spine the way she liked. His wing was draped over her to shield her from the outside world and provide warmth. It felt like ages, but slowly, he felt her jaw unclench. Her shoulders dropped, and fists gripping his shirt began to loosen. He let out a quiet breath, thankful she was finally starting to relax. Nox never did like showing vulnerability, but he was her safety, and sure enough, she began to doze off in his arms.

He, however, was far too angry to sleep.

The last time she showed a need like this, it was the terrible nightmares she used to have about an unknown figure with white hair; the nightmare was always just out of reach, something she could never fully access, but it distressed her greatly. Over the years, they began to stop. The last one, she had been nine, maybe ten?

Burying his nose in her hair, he breathed deeply. She smelled of medical sanitizer and IV - fueling his ire further. She was given a sedative when she was taken in for her… episode? He wasn’t entirely sure what they took her for. They drugged her, put her in solitary confinement, all alone, for an entire week, and did something that he suspected was entirely related to those bandages along her belly.

He’d demand answers from Yokumiru for that, too. He’d get to the bottom of it even if he had to hurt someone.

Her purrs slowly lost their sharp, urgent nature and became a soft rumble. She wasn’t content or happy, but she at least felt safe enough to drift to sleep. Surely, whatever drugs they gave her would be in her system, which meant the only thing genuinely keeping her up was her drive for self-preservation. It felt good to know he could give her the safety needed to sleep off whatever they gave her, even if it were dampened and bittersweet in the grand scheme. 

Once he was sure enough she was sound asleep, he carefully shifted his wing to get a better look at her condition. The staff had bandaged both of her inner elbows, as well as her wrist, which meant they struggled to place the IV. Marks on her wrists and her arms suggested restraints had been used - perhaps a bit too tight, but if she was angry, it was necessary for their safety. They also trimmed her nails - maybe an attempt at disarming her, though Nox was far more likely to punch than scratch. Her skin was a little more pallid than usual and a bit dry, suggesting she was slightly underhydrated.

And those bandages. Those goddamned bandages that offended Hawks with their very presence. He couldn’t wait; he had to know what was beneath them.

Carefully, he began to tug and peel back the wraps on her right hip - just enough to get a peek.

What he found only enraged him further.

Beneath was an incision just above the belt line on the far right side of her abdominal cavity. Worse, they didn’t use a healing quirk to resolve the problem. Instead, they used butterfly closers and sutures, leaving her body to repair itself independently. The incisions were red and inflamed, lacking edema crusting or a proper scab. They were fresh - perhaps done just hours before being released back to his care, and something she’d be stuck recovering from for days, maybe weeks, depending on the nature of the procedure. 

No doubt, yet again, the responsibility of her care was on his shoulders. He was the only one who could touch her when sick or injured. But why wouldn’t they use a healing quirk on someone meant to be his field partner?

Field partner .

It almost had an audible click. The notion that Nox was meant to be his field partner brought so much into question. Why wouldn’t they let her leave the facility for rapport and PR? Why were they so much more callous with her than him? They treated her more like a liability than an actual extrajudicial hero-in-training. 

It only pissed him off more.

Carefully, he maneuvered the bandages back into place before wrapping himself around her protectively. His feathers hardened in their fury, trembling with his rage. He growled quietly into her hair, trying desperately to force the fury down as the bile rose in his throat. 

He had to stay strong for her.

Tomorrow, he’d start searching for answers.

And he’d make goddamn sure someone paid for whatever they had done.

Chapter Text

Once again, another sleepless night.

While Nox managed to sleep soundly, undoubtedly thanks to the cocktail of drugs running through her system, Hawks was not so lucky. He spent most of the night holding her close and providing touches he knew to be comforting - running his hands along her back, stroking her hair, rubbing her scalp, anything he could. He wasn’t sure if it was for her sake or his own, but he felt compelled to keep his hands moving on her. To make sure she knew she was with him and that he was there for her like he always was before. 

She stayed close, keeping her face nuzzled into his lapel - something she only did when the nightmares left her feeling unsafe in the past. It had been a long time since they had shared a bed, but there was no way she could have made it to her room on the far end of their apartment-style dorm, even if she didn’t need his comfort. She only stirred occasionally when the pressure in her incisions bothered her. He’d pause and hold perfectly still until she was comfortable again before continuing his soothing ministrations, rewarded with a brief, lazy purr as she re-entered her sleep cycle. 

It was only when he heard the door click and the gruff voice of Yokumiru that focus was pulled from her.

Unable to restrain his ire, he sent a feather that impacted and stuck in the sheetrock just centimeters away from Yokumiru’s face with a low, menacing growl, “Mera. What the hell did they do to her?”

Yokumiru startled slightly, caught off guard by the red pinion stuck in the wall, but overall remained unbothered. His charges were not particularly likely to hurt him, and Hawks’ aim with those feathers had always been impeccable. He glanced towards the open bedroom door to the right of the entrance before rolling his eyes. 

So they were doing that again, eh?

“Well, good morning to you, too, kid,” Mera chided, naturally taking on a more familial role with these two. “She looks like she’s out, but if you keep raising your voice like that, you will wake her. Leave her with your shirt, and she will be fine, I’m sure.”

“She’s sleeping, so no, duh, I’m gonna be quiet.” Hawks huffed in response to his reprimand. “ Fine. ”

He watched as Yokumiru placed a large paper bag on the counter and began to unpack treats and goodies for a moment before his gaze returned to Nox. He didn’t want to leave her alone but needed to know what happened to her. Carefully untangling himself from her, he gently brushed the hair out of her face. She always looked so sweet when she was asleep. 

With a sigh, he reached for the hem of his shirt. He paused momentarily, realizing that it was his scent Yokumiru was referring to. Instead, he reached for his workout shirt from the night before, hoping his sweat would be more comforting than the shirt he slept in. Gingerly, he placed his dirty shirt in her grasp and watched as she nuzzled into it.

“Sorry,” he mumbled as he looked down at Nox’s sleeping form, brushing one last lock of hair out of her face before finally exiting the room.

He made his way to the stools at the counter that functioned as their dinner table. With a pouty huff, he plopped down onto the one closest to his bedroom. With his arms crossed tightly across his chest, he swiveled to face the older man, wings fluffed and raised in visible anger.

“What did they do to her,” he growled, eyes fixed on Yokumiru’s face in a glare. “I need to know.”

Yokumiru sighed, organizing the items from his paper bag on the counter. Nox ate raw, but Hawks needed his food cooked, and he couldn’t rightly feed one kid and not the other. He almost felt they were younger siblings - or niblings - to him.

“I really wish they’d tell you what’s happening to you,” Yokumiru murmured, grabbing a small skillet from the hooks above the stove. “How much do you know about Jaguar physiology and your companion there?"

He knew Hawks would not know why Nox was taken; they don’t teach heteromorphic biology in class because it varies wildly. Even two twins may have different psychological presentations. But the question seemed like a good opener, a way to get Hawks talking without sending the kid into a fury. While he appreciated how protective the boy was of Nox, it could certainly be a hindrance at times. 

“Not much,” Hawks admitted, eyes flicking away as he scolded himself internally. He had no idea what they had done to her while they isolated her, and he was honestly worried about what he was about to hear.

The reality was, after the leopard debacle, Hawks never really cared to learn. He didn’t see the need to understand what made his partner like this, but he was beginning to understand the mistake he made in his initial dismissal. For him, Nox was just Nox, and he thought she would tell him what he needed to know. Though, it wasn’t lost on him that she may not have known, either. Then, even if she did, she was always so closed off regarding her more feline tendencies.

“She doesn’t like talking about it, so I never pushed,” Hawks mumbled again, leaning forward to rest his crossed arms on the counter with a sigh. “Is - Is something wrong with her? ”

Yokumiru hummed thoughtfully as he readied the pain with sesame oil. Figures .

“I’ll get straight to the point, kid,” Yokumiru murmured, moving on to chop green onions and mushrooms while the pan heated up. “Nox had her first heat; that’s why she lashed out. We never really know when or even if a heteromorph will experience a cycle like that. But, the organization has always been wary of the danger she poses, and how she swiped at Ren confirmed those anxieties.”

Hawks froze when his handler explained why Nox was taken. Slowly, his eyes began to widen as the realization hit him. Nox had a heat. He didn’t know if that meant she was in pain or just poorly regulated because it was her first actual hormonal cycle, but he knew he should have been the one to comfort her. Not only that but she had been taken in such a violent manner for something entirely out of her control.

And now, he knew why.

“Danger? To whom?” he snapped, wings flaring. “Why the hell did they keep me away from her? I should have been there to calm her down! If you had just left her the fuck alone-”

“Watch it,” Yokumiru interjected in a gentle but chiding tone.

“She’s perfectly in control of herself; always has been.” Hawks retorted in a pouty huff.

Hawks sighed, finally uncrossing his arms to rest his forehead in one of his palms. He had always wondered why the HPSC never let her be. He had a feeling it had something to do with heightened aggression, but she never actually hurt anyone. She was abrasive and moody but not dangerously violent, right? He had known that a swipe like that was her not feeling well, but if she was hormonal, and a man she didn’t want touching her was trying to put his hands on her? Of course, she’d be upset. It made perfect sense, at least to him.

“It’s her origins, kid,” Yokumiru sighed, cracking quail eggs into the skillet before adding a dash of salt and shredded cheese. “Nox was brought to us when she was about four or so, seized from a raid on a villain compound. No birth records exist in any country for a child with her mutation. We don’t know where she came from, and that makes some people very anxious.”

Yokumiru couldn’t say much more, but it was better than giving the boy false information. There was so much speculation and hearsay about Nox it could be hard to separate conjecture from the facts. It didn’t help that he saw the relationship budding between these two wards, even if they were oblivious to it, and he wouldn’t be the reason either child acted foolish.

Hawks remained utterly silent as he listened. While he was considered the resident expert on all things Nox, he didn’t know that about her. Truthfully, he never really wondered about her past; when he had asked before when they were kids, she said she didn’t remember. From the nightmares she had, he deduced she came from dire circumstances, that maybe she had to be rescued from something. But, seized during a raid was not on his bingo card of missing Nox lore.

His lips turned down as he thought about it, chin crinkling in a frown. No one, not even the HPSC with their intricate network, could pinpoint where she came from. He remembered the way the commission always warned him about her, how they discouraged him from ever interacting with her but never told him anything beyond that she was ‘violent’ and ‘dangerous.’ He was ashamed to admit he bought it early on until he saw her broken body in the infirmary with Ren looming over her, yelling in a language he would later find she barely understood. That she lacked sufficient knowledge of the language only just now struck him as unusual.

“Why does it matter?” he questioned, leaning back in his chair with his golden eyes fixed on Yokumiru. “Just because she was found with villains doesn’t mean she is a villain. Isn’t that what we’re doing here? Training to be heroes ?”

“It’s not always that simple, Keigs,” Yokumiru sighed, adding the diced ramps and dried mushroom slices. “Don’t get me wrong, I believe nurture has a bigger impact than nature, but it’s above my pay grade.”

“Well, then, it sounds like you need a raise.” Hawks huffed, wings flaring behind him.

“Watch it.”

Hawks was silent again, his brows furrowed in thought. Nox was his best friend, and his protectiveness over her had become stronger than ever - stronger than it probably should have been. He hated the idea of her losing her free will, of being taken from him, especially now that she came back to their dorm scared and broken. She didn’t have to say anything; he could see how much she was hurting on her face and mannerisms.

A soft sigh left him as his shoulders drooped. He ran a hand through his hair, clearly showing his frustrations, before leaning against the counter again. He rested his temple on the heel of his palm, staring at the countertop.

“Why can’t they just let her have some freedom? I know she’s perfectly capable of taking care of herself. Even in the state she’s in right now, she could still kick my ass if she needed to,” Hawks mumbled, more to himself than anything, before his gaze rose to address Yokumiru. “Why wouldn’t they just let me help? My job’s always been to keep her calm; why change that now? Why can’t I be there for her?”

Yokumiru hummed sympathetically. What young girl wasn’t moody when their hormones started shifting? It seemed unfair that she had to be kept under lock and key simply because her existence was unexplained. They trained the two of them together - to support one another. Yet, Nox was barred from attending the early PR trips to prepare them for their career. With her appearance, she needed all the goodwill she could muster now from these planned events. Pairing her with someone to create a dynamic where they complimented each other’s weaknesses was already lucky, but Hawks tested very well with the public. 

Nox, not so much.

Adding to the pressure, her birthday was coming up that weekend. Hawks always made it a big to-do, getting more extravagant and involved as they age. But now, he’s been asking to take time out of the facility. The kids' ideas varied wildly—from taking her to some trails in the woods to shrines; hell, he even proposed a fish market to let her pick all the best, freshest cuts of her favorite seafood. 

Yokumiru didn’t have the heart to tell him the answer was ‘no,’ especially when it was all so speculative. He’d worry about it once Hawks settled on something - and bid for his charges, of course, though he didn’t expect that to get any traction. 

“It doesn’t mean the system isn’t corrupt,” Hawks muttered bitterly before letting out a low sigh.

He hated the way people looked at Nox. Like she was feral , an animal, he had seen firsthand how she had been judged on appearances alone because her quirk came from a predator. He knew he was the golden boy and tested better than she did; that’s why he planned to have her start an agency with him—together, as equals .

“I know,” Yokumiru acknowledged.

“It’s unfair,” Hawks repeated, his voice grumbling.

“I know,” Yokumiru confirmed gently.

Hawks wings lowered in defeat. He hated it. Nox was his person, partner, and best friend, and she was being punished for something that wasn’t even her fault. It was her instincts and personality; she was wild and hard to control, but she had a good heart. She was brash and abrasive, but beneath that, she was kind.

“Mera,” he asked quietly, pausing momentarily before his eyes raised to look towards the older man. “Can you even tell me what they did to her?”

Oh, there it was . Yokumiru sighed and added some fresh dill to Hawks’ meal, the question hanging heavily in the air. He ruminated momentarily, trying to find the best way to break the truth to this child who didn’t even realize his feelings. Should he be overly direct? Should he downplay the issue because this was pretty normalized in the organization?

“I honestly do not know much about what happened beyond being in solitary for her behavior,” Mera started gently. “I don’t know if they did some type of aversion therapy or anything. But, at the end of her time, she had a surgery that all recruits get; they sterilized her."

Chapter Text

Sterilized?
At fourteen?

The anger flared in Hawks again - his wings unfurled harshly, feathers bristling. They had put Nox, the one person he ever worked well with, in a room and forced her to be alone. Then they went and sterilized her? For what? For hormones and instincts she didn’t expect to have and didn’t know how to suppress. For the first time, he truly understood what it meant to feel your blood boil; he felt warm, his fists clenched until his knuckles turned white, his feathers rustled as his wings began to tremble in fury. 

“Sterilized,” he repeated the word softly, an air of disbelief carried in his tone. “You’re telling me they sterilized her.”

He fell silent again for several moments as his mind reeled. He tried to process what he was hearing, tried to separate his fury from the fact of the matter. Ultimately, they concluded that surgery was the best option. They sterilized Nox; that was it. It was done. They didn’t want her to have kids. Ever.

“This is bullshit,” he stated harshly, his breath trembling with his barely contained anger.

“It’s a ligation , Keigs,” Yokumiru clarified somberly, hating how they treated their wards. He knew Hawks didn’t understand his feelings yet, but he had his suspicions of what was really angering him, deep down. “She still has all her reproductive organs. They just cut and cauterized her fallopians. It can be reversed at a later date; there are risks, but it can be done. Plenty of recruits - wards, just like you and Nox - come through here and have kids later in life just fine.”

“Those bastards,” he growled, blood rushing in his ears as his sense of injustice burned within him and fueled his fury. They permanently altered her body, and for what? Because they were scared that she had instincts during her first heat? “She’s a person , not an animal!”

Yokumiru sighed and returned to preparing Hawks’ breakfast. The kid was clearly not in a place to hear him at the moment. He knew he should probably scold him, help him towards the equanimity he needs to learn for his role, but even Yokumiru remembered what it was like to be fourteen. Young, emotional, full of testosterone and fury, angry at the world for perceived injustices - and, he would be the first to admit, both these kids had faced plenty of actual injustice. They’d handled it all with surprising grace so far. Besides, if it were his woman, Yokumiru would be just as angry. 

He’d let Hawks have this one - this outburst - and burn himself out.
The kid earned it.

Hawks, on the other hand, was spiraling; his inner conflict felt palpable to Yokumiru. He was relieved they went for something that could be reversed, but there was still a chance Nox wouldn’t be able to have children because of it, and that thought made an ache grow deep in his stomach. He knew that she might not even want children later in life, but the choice being removed from her was infuriating. He couldn’t help but think of the life they could have had; the life Nox was denied by the HPSC.

He felt rage. Pure, blinding rage. His feathers were hardened, sharp enough to draw blood at the softest touch. Every muscle in his body was coiled tight, his mind racing, and his heart thumping hard in his chest as he felt himself shaking. Rising to his feet, he began to pace frantically as a low, distressed rasp sounded in his chest [*]. The very thought of the hell she had been put through the past week because they were afraid of her played out again and again in his mind, and it took every ounce of his self-control not to rush off. To not go out there and find Ren and whoever was in charge and beat them out of this mortal coil. He knew it wouldn’t accomplish anything, no matter how much he wanted to, and that only frustrated him further.

“Why couldn’t they just let me be with her?!” he screeched, those long dormant avian vocal cords were taught and raspy. “Why can’t they let me be with her during her heats? I’m better than any goddamn tranquilizer, Mera!”

Nox was his job. It was his job to ensure she remained in control. It was his job to make sure she was happy and safe. It was his job to ensure she didn’t get knocked up. He stopped, staring at the wall, entirely at a loss for what to do. For the first time in such a long time, he felt truly helpless. Desperation began to sink in.. 

“It’s not fair , Mera!” he rasped shakily, trying to rein himself in. “It’s not her fault.”

“She’ll still have her heat, Keigs,” Yokumiru offered, trying to help his charge see reason. He knew , deep down, that Hawks had some deeper bond with Nox that couldn’t be equated to normal human attraction, and the rasping made him even more suspicious that it had everything to do with his quirk. “She’ll still be able to be herself. They didn’t take away her feline nature.”

Hawks cursed loudly under his breath in anger at Yokumiru’s words. He should have known this would happen. They had to “make sure no unplanned pregnancy occurred”; he had overheard one of those bastards saying it before. Sure, the dorms were co-ed, but it’s not like they were thirty-year-olds playing in a teen movie.  He didn’t even think about sex, especially not with the people in this dorm. Besides, sterilization without consent was wrong . It didn’t matter whether the subject was male or female, or if it could be reversed.

That didn’t make it better . And why had they thrown her in solitary for it? Because of one heat? Sure, she had been a bit spicy , a little aggressive, but she hadn’t hurt anyone. She was still able to keep her senses, she just didn’t feel right, and wanted to rest. She just didn’t want Ren to touch her. Was that so wrong? Why did they have to go so far?

“This is cruel and unusual punishment, Mera,” Hawks hissed. “She still has her ovaries ; she still has her hormones .”

“I know,” Yokumiru offered his agreement. 

The boy wasn’t wrong, after all, and one of the things he always admired about his charge was his strong sense of duty. They just needed to condition him to start seeing the grey in morality. The evils done for the greater good and the sterilization of the wards were part of that. To limit downtime caused by menstrual cycles and unplanned pregnancies. Yokumiru knew deep down his ward wanted to breed Ren’s ward, even if the kid couldn’t see it yet, and they were not naive enough to believe it would never happen under the HPSC roof.

“Does the HPSC just see her… see us both… as weapons ?!” Hawks snapped back, receiving no response. “As tools without feelings?!”

He huffed at the lack of response from Yokumiru, then took a shaky breath. They had taken her from him, forced her into an invasive procedure, and she was expected to just return to it all like any part of that wasn’t traumatic. He was absolutely livid, but when his eyes moved to the bedroom door, the world stopped. They had been so rough with Nox at a time when she was so vulnerable. He wanted to check on her, to hold her close and never let go again. To keep her safe . 

Sterile .

That word rang in his very soul like a death knell. That beautiful girl was sterile. The very thing he thought of whenever he thought of her… A future. A life with her in it. His best friend's kids running around when they met up at the park for coffee. The tea she’d spill on her future husband, and the way her eyes would light up as they laughed together. How beautifully she’d handle her kids' scrapes. Nox would be everything to her kids that his mother never could be to him.  His wings drooped, lowering almost to the floor as his heart broke for a future that felt so out of reach now.

What was worse: he couldn’t make them change their minds because it was already done. He let out a heavy breath, trying to remind himself that it could be reversed, even if it had risks.

“Goddammit…” Hawks growled, carding a hand through his hair in frustration before, finally, taking his seat on the stool. “She doesn’t know, does she?”

“I can’t imagine so, Keigs,” Yokumiru admitted with a solemn tone. “I’m sorry.”

Hawks let out a sharp exhale through his teeth, taking a moment to calm himself before following up. “So… she’s not fertile anymore?”

“Not for the time being, no,” Yokumiru confirmed, flipping the egg mixture in the skillet. He had prepared a little spiel on his drive, hoping it would help ease his young charge, and right now, he was glad he had the forethought to rehearse it.  “We sterilize all of the recruits and wards in this program.. You might not see it, but a lot of you do act like Americans on spring holiday. It’s necessary - and doubly so for heteromorphs that experience a heat or rut. Nox isn’t the worst case I’ve seen come through here, especially considering that was her first heat, and she just seemed like she wanted to be left alone. However, a significant number do lose themselves in it - the imperative to breed or even just attract a breeding partner is strong. Since Nox has an animal-based quirk, it’s typically done after the first heat rather than the first signs of sexual interest like others.”

“It’s common practice, sure,” Hawks huffed, eyes narrowing. Some wards and recruits had strong libidos, sure, but Nox had never shown interest in anyone - hell , he was the only one that could get near her. “But that doesn’t make it right, Mera.”

“You’re not wrong,” Yokumiru conceded, though eventually he would need that kid to accept the doctrine of the greater good. Now was not the time for that battle, though. Not while Nox was recovering and Hawks was clearly guarding her.

Hawks exhaled again, running a tired hand over his face, trying to keep his anger in check. He didn’t feel much like eating anymore, his jaw set and gaze fixed on his bedroom door. While he was boiling beneath the surface, he had been getting better at masking his emotions; it was just hard when it was Nox. The urge to find every single person in the facility who had made the decision to touch her was still boiling beneath the surface. If it was standard procedure, he could accept that - but to do it to Nox? That was infuriating.

He didn’t understand why it was different with her, and, if he were being truthful, he wasn’t sure who he was angrier at. The HPSC for putting Nox through it? Ren, for the way she was dragged off? Or himself for not being able to stop it?

“The way she was taken, Mera,” Hawks started, quiet and deadly calm. “If everyone, including myself, has to be snipped, then fine . But the way that it was done to her , Mera? That was bullshit.”

“I know it’s not going to make you feel any better,” Yokumiru stated, adding some fresh dill as a finishing touch to the omelet. “But, for whatever it might be worth, I agree with you. Ren should not have taken her like that.”

Hawks growled, wings bristling at the mention of her handler. He had never liked that man, and he had even more reason to dislike him now. While he thought forced sterilization was barbaric, he could at least accept the logic behind that. The way Nox was treated, however, had no logic to it. She was treated like she was an animal - one that had a proven taste for blood. But she lashed out with an open palm - she swiped . She didn’t lunge, she didn't try to punch or kick.

She just didn’t want Ren to touch her, and something about that realization sat uncomfortably on his shoulders. Nox had been at the facility for years before he showed up. Ren had always been her handler, and god only knows how poorly she might have been treated before he finally said enough and intervened despite being deathly afraid of her himself. That’s how villains are made, you fool.

“How long does she need to recover?” Hawks asked coldly, staring intently at the bedroom door.

“A few days,” Yokumiru answered calmly, giving the omelet a few more flips to ensure a uniform golden colour. “She should be good for whatever fun plans you’re cooking up for her birthday this weekend.”

Hawks nodded slightly, still angry at the thought of what Nox had been through. But there was a hint of relief that she wouldn’t be out long. She would recover quickly and continue planning for her birthday. The previous year, he had set up an obstacle course with Yokumiru’s help to give her a bit of quirk fulfillment. High, arboreal climbs and deep pool dives. God, did he love to watch her swim .

“She’ll be pissed about not being able to train…” he mumbled, feathers finally beginning to soften. “I don’t want her trying to train before she’s recovered. The damn idiot is stubborn like that.”

Nox was always a perfectionist when it came to her training. She would routinely push herself to her limit and try even harder to outdo everyone else. She was highly competitive, and her confidence was well earned. While to some, her confidence might seem like arrogance, she had proven it time and again in drills to be demonstrable, and when partnered with him for ranged support, they were a force to be reckoned with.

“You know,” Yokumiru started to suggest, after a moment of thought. Training aside, Hawks always found something exciting around the compound for Nox, and he was sure the boy would want to do something extra special in light of the most recent developments. “I can extend your leave - just until she’s ready to get back to training.”

With the offer of having his own leave extended, Hawks perked up, relaxing just a fraction. He knew it would be best if they both got to stay on downtime a little longer. Nox would no doubt throw a fit at being off training. She needed to train; it’s how she managed to deal with life. But alone time with her sounded terrific , and it gave him time to plan something extra special for her birthday. No doubt, she’d need it.

“You can do that?” Hawks asked breathlessly, at a loss and caught off guard by the offer. “That would be best, sir. Please.”

“As your handler, I can make that call, yes,” Yokumiru confirmed, turning off the heat on the stove and allowing the omelet to rest.

“Really?!” Hawks exclaimed, wings ruffling excitedly as his gaze finally returned to the older agent caring for him. “I can take time off to stay with her until she’s fit to train again?!”

“Of course,” Yokumiru chuckled softly, slicing some fresh strawberries. Even if he hadn’t wanted to give these two this time, Hawks would be useless if he were worried about Nox. “However long she needs to be physically and mentally ready to return to training, I can accommodate.”

“I appreciate it,” Hawks answered with a nod, his wings settling down.

He was surprised at the offer, but he wasn’t about to say no. He’d rather have the week off to take care of Nox and help with whatever emotions she inevitably would have after being in solitary than let her be alone. Of course, he’d be lying if he didn’t also admit that part of the impetus is doting on her in apology; he couldn’t protect her. He failed to do so, and he was determined to make sure she knew she was safe with him, especially now that he knew what was happening to her. The news would be best coming from him, too.

His wings ruffled again at the thought of being allowed that time with her, coverts raising excitedly like hackles. He could spoil her for her birthday; really, truly spoil her. The one-on-one time he was being afforded would give him the perfect cover to plan the perfect birthday for her. He just needed to see her smile, like she did in his vision of her future . He needed to know that it was still possible, even if she couldn’t reproduce right now.

“Can I…” Hawks sighed quietly, a hint of worry flashing across his features as he took a more solemn tone. “Can I see her?”

Yokumiru sighed, plating the omelet. He had made sure both kids had a healthy meal for breakfast, but his ward was more interested in their partner. Of course, he would be; it made sense. Even if both Hawks and Nox were oblivious to it, the budding affection and unusual bond between them was clear as day to him. With a small, tired smile, he reached into the paper bag and produced several large fish steaks as well as a pre-sliced container of salmon sashimi. While the steaks would go in the small kitchenette fridge, he handed the sashimi to Hawks.

“I went all the way to iMart for this, Keigs,” he stated softly as he produced some brand-new steel chopsticks with black rosettes laser etched into the ends. “I wanted Nox to have her favorite foods while she recovered. This sashimi is from the Faroe Islands and is very rich. I’m sure she’ll love it. I’m putting mackerel, bluefin, and a few other types of salmon in the fridge. The omelet is here for you when you decide you’re hungry - or she yells at you for not nourishing yourself.”

Hawks looked away, a little embarrassed. He realized he was brushing off something that Yokumiru had taken time to do because his mind was on Nox. While he knew he was putting on his usual strong demeanor to hide his worry for her, Hawks did feel guilty that his handler cared so much, yet here He was just pushing it aside.

“I’m sorry, Mera. I just…” Hawks sighed, looking at the bedroom door once again and frowning. “I’m worried about her, and it’s hard to think about food right now. I promise I’ll eat, just not yet.”

He took the container of salmon before eyeing the fish steaks. He knew Nox loved seafood and always had a preference for salmon. He took a moment to inspect the fish - what was so special about the Faroe Island salmon anyway? The cuts had thin but numerous bands of fat, but what told him Nox would love this treat was the colour. The flesh was a deep, yet natural, pink, indicating a rich flavor. He smiled to himself, setting the chopsticks on top of the container. It was almost ironic to him that Yokumiru had gotten all her favorite foods. If the situation weren’t so serious, he’d make a joke, but he was too preoccupied.

“Thank you, Mera,” Hawks spoke earnestly, giving his handler a slight bow. “She’s going to be happy having her favorite foods while he recovers. It will mean so much to her.” He then paused, standing once more. “Is it all right if I go check on her now?”

“Wait,” Yokumiru urged with a solemn smile. It hurt to see his charges in such a rough state, but there was only so much he could do. Reaching into his inner jacket pocket, he produced one more item—an old, prepaid clamshell phone meant for children. “I’m breaking a rule, giving you this, but it only has my number programmed into it and cannot make any other outgoing calls. I even disabled EMS because that would just ping us .”

He slid the phone across the counter, his expression deadpan and serious as he continued. “If anything happens, you call me directly using this. Not Ren, not Madame President. Just me.”

“Now, go take care of her, kid,” Yokumiru added, straightening his jacket before turning to clean up the kitchenette. “I’ll get all of this taken care of, then head out so you two can be alone.”

Hawks took the phone with a small but genuine smile. After placing the device in his sweatpants pocket, he looked up at Mera and gave one more bow before bounding off. He didn’t need to be told twice to check on his partner - he was itching to see her. The only thing keeping him from being with her right then was his need to discuss the issue at hand with Yokumiru.

With bated breath, he quietly opened his bedroom door, closing the door behind him as he crossed the threshold.

That kid is really down bad, and he doesn’t even know it, Yokumiru mused to himself as he cleaned the skillet. At the rate he’s going, he’ll be following her around like a lost puppy the rest of his life.

Chapter Text

Nox was out.

Typically, the sound of the door latching would be enough to make her stir, no matter how delicate Hawks was. But, there wasn’t so much as a twitch. Even as he sighed and sat carefully on the edge of the bed, there wasn’t any indication she was aware of his presence. He figured it was the surgical drugs; general anesthesia could linger in the systems of some individuals, and he recalled seeing information that in cats, it can take days to recover. With Nox’s feline liver and metabolism, along with the variable of which drug they used, she could be in for a rough recovery. 

But, wasn’t that what he was there for?
Hawks sighed, running a hand over his face.

She didn’t seem to be in any type of distress, at least. That stung, a little, at first. The idea that she was less distressed without Hawks stung. But, as she nuzzled deeper into his shirt, it clicked and eased that anxiety. It was a, quite frankly, rancid shirt from working out in the dorm while she was out. At the surface, it was probably uncomfortable to think about. Still, the extra concentrated smell likely provided additional comfort to her in her condition by overwhelming her olfactory senses with - well, him . He almost didn’t want to disturb her; she looked incredibly peaceful, nearly reminiscent of a cat in its favorite sun spot.

Then, there were the bandages. It hurt to look at, knowing what they had done to Nox. At least she didn’t seem to be in pain at that moment, but seeing them on her body made his anger flare. It probably was not safe to change them just yet, he reasoned, assuming the surgery was shortly after she was sent to the dorm. The realization that she was sent to find her way back to him without an escort, in the state she was, dawned on him with a new fury. He wanted to put her fish aside, lie next to her and wrap her up in his arms again; to wrap his wings around her to provide a comforting cave or… den …. To make her feel safe. 

Then again, being next to her when she finally woke enough to realize that something had been done to her, to her body, without her knowledge? 
Distance was safer.
Besides, she needed to eat.

“Hey, kitten,” he cooed, placing his hand on her deltoid and rubbing with a gentle but firm pressure. Over the years, he’d learned that touching her here, or on the knee, was the safest way to wake her. Statistically, she was the least likely to grab him by the throat in blind panic. “It’s time to wake up. I’ve got something for you.”

Nox stirred at his gentle palpations, unusually sluggish in her wakefulness. It took several long moments before her eyes slowly began to flutter open. She yawned, a low feline rumble echoing in her throat while her body straightened for a stretch. So far, she didn’t seem bothered by the surgical marks, but such pains could be delayed. Those marks were a visible reminder of what she had been through and were a source of anger and pain for him. Just seeing them made his coverts rise in fury while thoughts of Ren and blóðǫrn flashed through his mind.

“Birdie?” she questioned, rubbing the sleep from her dilated, unfocused eyes. Her tone seemed almost in disbelief that she was looking at him.

She was so out of it, and it was making her adorable.
She probably didn’t remember the walk back to the dorm or the evening she spent in his arms .

“Yeah, it’s me,” he teased gently, his wings lowering as he watched her rubbing at her eyes persistently. The raspy, sleep-laden voice filled him with a warmth he had never thought possible. “Who else would it be?”

Who else but your favorite Birdie? The use of that childhood nickname had recently begun to pull at his heartstrings. Maybe it was how childish it was, or a callback to a simpler time; he couldn’t be sure. But it never failed to make his heart flutter while a nostalgic warmth ran through him. 

He smiled sweetly at her, resisting the urge to reach out and run a hand through her hair. The sound she made as she stretched was cute and, while it was primarily due to the drugs in her system, it was almost adorable to watch. Even in this state, her brilliant blue eyes brought him a sense of relief. While a part of his mind was fixated and furious about those damn bandages, at least she looked better this morning than she did last night.

“I brought you some breakfast, kitten. Something I know you’ll like,” Hawks soothed, trying to quiet the sheer excitement he felt at just being able to see her again. He opened the sashimi container and wafted the air towards her, hoping she would catch the scent and come to a bit more. “You need to eat, though, so you need to sit up.”

He watched as her black-rimmed eyes lazily drifted closed in a slow-blink before she sucked in air through her cheeks.
Flehmen. 
Success.

She chuffed softly before sucking air in again. Nox normally jumped at the smell of quality fish and game meat. Yet, she was performing another Flehmen response. His eyebrows furrowed as she seemed to struggle to place the scent. He had her favorite food, which she could usually distinguish quite easily. But right now, something was wrong. It had to be related to the drugs she was given; it was the only thing that made sense. Was it possible that the drugs interfered with her sense of smell? Or perhaps she was just so groggy she couldn’t place the scent?

“Salmon?” She questioned groggily. 

His smile faltered, feathers ruffling in his concern. He had never seen Nox so out of it. She would typically be much more active and eagerly sit up in bed for a treat like this. But she was still lying down, barely able to get the strength or energy to open her eyes properly.

“Yep,” he nodded, trying to keep his voice gentle and encouraging. “Real Faroe Island salmon, your absolute favorite. I’ll help you, if you like, but you have to sit up to eat it.”

Nox blinked at him a few times, rubbing at her eyes again. Her inability to focus her gaze must be distressing for a sight-dependent predator like herself. The thought sat heavy in his chest, knowing he’d likely feel the same in her shoes and hoping that, when it was his turn for such a procedure, he wouldn’t require any general anesthesia. Slowly, she raised herself from the bed, wobbly and uncoordinated in her movements. Haphazardly, she tried to reach for pillows to stack behind her, unable to hold herself up fully. Her movements reminded him of his father when he was too drunk to go after him. 

That’s when she winced, twisting her body to deal with the bedding jostling her fresh stitches. 

Hawks reacted quickly, reaching to help steady her by placing his hand on her upper arm. The nonverbal cue he was sending was reading loud and clear between them: I’ve got you . He set the container of sashimi on the nightstand before maneuvering the pillows behind her to support her back. He felt an odd twinge of jealousy towards those pillows - an intrusive thought entering his mind and leaving just as quickly as it had arrived.
That he should be the one she’s leaning against .

“Hey, slow down, kitten! Let me do it,” he urged as sweetly as possible. “You just had some surgery, please be careful. It might take a few days before your stitches are healed enough for you to move like that.”

Hawks struggled to fight back the flash of anger he felt at her being in pain. The urge to rampage his way through the entire facility just to find Ren, to destroy Ren, and anyone that oversaw the procedure forced on her without any recovery quirk in play. The logical part of him understood that a recovery quirk would undo the entire surgery, but this brash emotional side of him was unwilling to hear the logic behind it. His raised covert feathers would give away his agitation if she could see them, and for that moment, he was almost glad her eyes couldn’t focus properly.

Once she was settled, he inched himself closer to the bed's headboard, to her. He wanted to move slowly and not spook her, but dilated pupils in cats were better at peripheral and movement detection than focus. It was a struggle between what his first instinct told him and what his education told him. He tried to find the middle ground; movements that weren’t jerky or agitated, but not quiet moving through molasses. Carefully, he brushed some hair that had fallen in front of her face, tucking it behind her ear. Nox sniffed the air sharply before chuffing and rubbing her cheek against his palm with a deep, raspy purr. While he hated what had happened to her, the smile that crept across his features crinkled his eyes. 

There was something about how raw and unbidden she was in this state. It was adorable, heartwarming, and something else he couldn’t quite place. Vulnerability wasn’t something anyone got to see with Nox; even for him, it was rare and usually in states of panic. Her behavior here was something different, and in some ways, it triggered what he’d come to learn as cute-aggression. Beyond that initial, surface-level feeling, there was a stronger pull. He wanted - needed - to take care of her. To some level, he always felt responsible for her well-being; the Commission had made it his job to soothe and understand her since that fateful day, six, maybe seven years ago.

Had it really been that long?

“Here, let me help,” he stated calmly, bringing the container into his lap and situating his grip on the chopsticks. Carefully, he picked up a piece of the sashimi and held it to her. “Eat up, okay? You need the protein.”

The glare he received from Nox sent a chill down his spine.

“This is degrading, Birdie,” she growled, eyes narrowing sharply despite her pupils' dilated state. “I’m more than capable of feeding myself.”

“Nox, please , can you not fight me on this?” Hawks sighed, covert feathers fluffing in mild agitation. He knew she would respond this way, and this wasn’t the time for Nox to be her usual bitchy self. “Your depth perception is off, your eyes can’t focus, and you’re… uncoordinated , to put it gently.”

“Why?!” Nox snapped harshly back at him.

He held his tongue and fought he urge to take the opportunity of her impaired vision and shove a slice of fish straight into her mouth. It wasn’t her fault , he told himself. She had no idea what had happened to her, and it was as likely that she had very little recollection of anything immediately surrounding the procedure, like returning to the dorm. Nox wasn’t necessarily out of character to respond to confusion with anger, and she was never happy when her independence was encroached upon. But explaining the situation to her was different; she needed help taking care of herself, like it or not.

“I know that you’re more than capable of taking care of yourself, Nox,” he tried to soothe diplomatically. As much as he had the urge to coddle her in her current state, it would just make her angrier, and the last thing either of them needed was for her to try to throw a punch. “I know you probably don’t remember, but you are recovering from surgery, so please, don’t get pissed off at me just because you’re out of it and need a little extra help. Just humor me, okay? Please?”

Nox huffed, momentarily glaring to the side before she begrudgingly took the slice of raw salmon he offered. As the fish hit her tongue, something shifted in her demeanor, and it took a significant amount of self-control not to coo at her - he was trying to unlearn that behavior, after all. She chewed slowly, her eyes drifting shut in a slow blink as she seemingly savored the rich imported piscine protein. It was a natural deep pink with thin but numerous banding throughout the sliced filet. Even to him, it looked and smelled delectable, and he could only imagine the heaven it brought to the feline heteromorph in front of him. Her diet couldn’t consist solely of fish; her body needed variety. Not just of different protein families, but sources - Mackerel wasn’t the same as Salmon, any more than beef was the same as Bison. Fish was a favorite, though abundant and cheap throughout most of the island. The import from an entirely different ocean was a rare treat for her, and it was enough to elicit a faint purr as she swallowed the slice down. 

It did nothing for the murderous glare, though.

“Oh, don’t look so mad! You haven’t had this stuff in quite a while, kitten,” he chimed playfully, pressing another piece against her vibrating lips with the chopsticks, immensely grateful for the utensil between her teeth and his fingers. “Here, have another piece.”

She sniffed the air before her growl quieted, and she slowly took the fish he offered. His eyes locked with that signature, ominous glare. Nox could burn a hole in his skull with that gaze all she wanted. Right now, she needed to eat, and despite her grouchiness, she accepted his small gesture of assistance. Despite the danger he probably should have felt, he found her behavior cute - adorable, even - and slowly gave way to another slow blink and a slightly louder purr.

He took a chance, reaching out to run a hand over her head. With firm pressure, chopsticks still in hand, he ran his fingertips over her scalp and brushed her hair back. Something was captivating about her that he couldn’t quite put his finger on. Some might say it’s the same awe someone might feel when face-to-face with an angry predator at the zoo, with the thick glass all that prevents you from being mauled. But it wasn’t quite that, not for him. He hadn’t felt truly unsafe with her once he began to understand her, and he was sure the rest of the recruits could reach the same place he had. You had to respect the raw power of someone like her, but meet it without fear to get the respect in return. 

No, what he felt was different in the same way his thoughts about her had changed recently. The ruminations he had while she was in solitary confinement, how much he had noticed her. Her skin was an ethereal, pale colour, reminding him of a shaved cat—the contrast of her black rosettes over her face, almost like freckles. Like a permanent eyeliner, the deep black pigment of her waterline contrasted beautifully with her thick black lashes and rich, sapphire-blue eyes. The baby fat was starting to leave her face, giving her a slightly more defined jaw and cheekbones. Her growing… chest … 

He quickly averted his eyes, clearing his throat to diffuse the flush coming to his cheeks. Looking down at the fish, he picked up another piece between his chopsticks before pressing it against her lips again. There was no growl this time as she begrudgingly accepted the sustenance he offered. 

“You’re a lot of work, you know that?” he sighed quietly. If it were anyone else, this behavior would annoy him. “I wish you would accept help when you need it, Nox.”

“And why would I need help?” she hissed in response.

A hiss that he recognized as half-hearted, rather than a threat. It meant that slowly, Nox was beginning to come around.

“You don’t remember anything about yesterday, do you, kitten?” he questioned gently. 

It was evident to him that she wasn’t fully aware of what had happened, why she was so tired and disoriented, or why things hurt when she moved. Injuries were common, and she was too out of it to fully piece the puzzle together. 

Hawks was used to her standoffish nature. From the moment he met her, he had always been pushy. He quickly learned how to work himself into her life, even at the risk of drawing her ire. She fought him at every turn and would likely continue to do so, but he was just as stubborn as she was in his own way. She could be an absolute pain in the ass, but she was his best friend. She was always going to be his person.

“A lot happened yesterday, kitten. I-” He trailed off, carding a hand through his hair. How was he supposed to explain this to her? Someone needed to tell her, but was he the best person? After a laden pause, he sighed, meeting her gaze with a look pleading for her understanding. “The reason you weren’t feeling well, the reason Ren took you, that you’re so out of it right now… You have a heat, Nox.”

“Oh…” Was all she managed to respond to for quite some time before, softly, she surmised, “So, my tubes were tied…”

“Cauterized,” he corrected gently. “But, yes.”

There was a heavy vulnerability in the air. Nox’s glare softened to one of confusion and minor irritation, which was understandable given her state. Then, a cloud of despondency seemed to hang above her. Vulnerability from her was rare in and of itself, but to see her internalize something like that in real time was something he had never seen before.

He didn’t like it .
This wasn’t the Nox he knew .

“Kitten,” Hawks soothed, placing his hand over hers to show solidarity and support. While it seemed logical to correlate her unusual shift in demeanor with the surgical drugs, the sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach disagreed. “You’re safe with me; you know that, right?”

“Yeah,” Nox muttered before flashing a weary smile. “Besides, it’s for the best, right? At least this way, I won’t be taken out of the field if something happens.”

“Don’t think about it too much right now, okay? You need to rest.” He insisted gently, picking up another slice of salmon and holding it to her lips. “Finish your breakfast, and then I’ll hang out with you while you rest, okay?”

She didn’t fight him this time, taking salmon without a fuss. He took moments to run his hands through her hair between each bite, trying to pull her out of the down mood she had entered. Slowly, she began to come around. She purred as she chewed over each slice, slowly savoring the rich flavor of the Faroe salmon. 

Just like when they were younger, she always started pushing away before his persistence caused her to relent. In some ways, it felt like a test; you had to want to be near her, help, and prove you weren’t afraid of her. It was unclear what purpose that defense mechanism served, and he wasn’t sure whether it was because of Ren or something that happened before she was with the organization. Yokumiru had mentioned that she was found among villains during a raid; who knows how that might have shaped her or what type of trauma she endured at such a young age. He had only just learned about attachment styles, and it was still very unclear to him what that meant or how to understand them - he wasn’t even sure if she was avoidant or disorganized.

But he knew that beneath that rough exterior was a heart of gold that just needed some TLC now and then. A girl who genuinely cared about the safety of others, who would make a wonderful hero, who would dirty her hands for the greater good. Someone is afraid to bond because she fears being hurt.

Villains might have raised her at first, but she would never be one.

Chapter Text

At first, taking care of Nox while she recovered from surgery was an exercise in patience and self-control.

As Hawks had expected, her fierce independence was more of a hindrance than a help. While in most other situations, it might be something to admire in her, she was fighting him at every step of her recovery. 

She remained wobbly and uncoordinated for days . Yokumiru had informed him they had given her Ketamine, specifically, as their anesthesia of choice. The justification for that particular drug was reasonable given her more feline internal biology. From his research, he found that some cats can take several days to regain normal motor function after anesthesia, and a focused expression and occasional growl also accompanied the hallucinations.

Feeding her always started with her insisting that she could handle it, failing, and begrudgingly accepting it. Bathing was no different; she’d fight, stumble, and then have to take his help. Hawks kept himself respectful in those moments; his eyes didn’t wander, he didn’t look at her while she soaked in the tub, and kept his eyes fixed on a book. Was it challenging, at times, not to want to peek at her body? Sure. He was a fourteen-year-old boy, and the curiosity was there. But he made do. Besides, it wasn’t worth damaging his relationship with his best friend.

As the days stretched on, though, she slowly drifted away from herself. 

Nox became despondent. She ate less and less and took less and less care of her appearance. She began to sleep increasingly, almost cocooning herself in his blankets until she finally felt well enough to leave his room and be on her own. He hated that growing distance, and it wasn’t like her to want to be away from him when she was not doing well.

He tried to give her space, he did, but it reached a boiling point for him when she stared off into space, looking straight through him like he wasn’t there with nothing to say. It would have been preferable for her to lash out, strike him, yell, and be angry over whatever this was. Being truly iced out by someone he was not only meant to manage but had come to care about deeply was more distressing than he had imagined.  

This wasn’t Nox .

He had a sneaking suspicion that Nox was internalizing the way Ren had treated her and the circumstances surrounding the way she was sterilized. Her handler had never been particularly kind to her, and as afraid of her as Hawks had been when he was younger, he couldn’t sit there and let her continue to be mistreated. The reason she became his responsibility was that he stood up to Ren. Truthfully, they were never meant to interact, and if Hawks hadn’t been at the right place, at the right time, with the right amount of frustration, who knows where Nox would be now?

Would she have survived the relentless experimentations? Would she have become more hostile towards the HPSC? Would she become a villain? 

It was frustrating. Nox needed his support, but she didn’t even realize it. Instead, she appeared to be withdrawing from everyone and everything. He even tried to take her out to the yard for what little fresh air they were allotted, and that didn’t seem to help. Within these walls, she was unreachable, and he wasn’t sure how to approach it.

At his wits' end, Hawks needed Nox to understand that there was more than just this facility. He felt, deep down, that if he could just get her out of the facility for a bit, she’d start to perk up. Being sterile, he had hoped that perhaps they’d let her on the PR patrols now - something everyone knew she desperately needed to get in front of, given her appearance - but that was quickly shot down. The restrictions on her never made sense to him; they were so concerned about whether or not they could control her, but wasn’t that what he was for?

Then, she missed her weekly meeting with her benefactor—something she had never done before. 

Something was wrong, and no one was willing to tell him the goddamn truth. He was exhausted from the secrecy and the lack of information. He needed to get answers. He needed to get Nox out of that damnable facility. He needed to do something different, and with her birthday coming up, he had the opportunity to focus on something new. He knew the HPSC wouldn’t permit it, especially with how much they had done to her, but he could pull rank.

In secrecy, he had spent the entire time taking care of her, trying to get a plan in place to get her out, if only just for her birthday. He knew what it would mean to be caught, and he didn’t care. It was worth seeing her finally celebrate her birthday like a normal person. He was determined to fight for it; he would cash in favors and leverage to make it happen, whether their handlers liked it or not. He w ould take her to see the beautiful flowers, even if he ended up in solitary confinement. The missed meeting with her mysterious benefactor was an opportunity he couldn’t afford to pass up.

He quickly jumped into action, tearing out of the dorm and sprinting through the hallways. Every second was critical, and he had to make it to the other side of the facility before Nox’s benefactor left. He was the only man that the HPSC would listen to. They’d bend over backwards for him, which meant he was the best and last shot to make this happen.

Standing at 220 centimeters tall, the man's muscular 275-kilo silhouette was unmistakable. Hawks would recognize him as the plush his mother couldn’t afford, instead giving him that cherished Endeavor doll that was on clearance. The man's head turned as rushing footfalls and loud, incoherent shouting grew louder, heading his way. His light blue eyes widened as a teen rushed to him, unkempt and unusually dressed down for what he had experienced in this facility.

Those red wings, though. The man would recognize them from Nox’s stories.

“Ah, young Hawks!” he exclaimed, voice booming behind his signature smile. “Is Nox well? I seem to have missed her today.”

Hawks skidded to a halt in the hallway, hands resting on his knees as he desperately tried to catch his breath without wasting too much of the man’s valuable time. 

“No! I mean - Yes, I mean - She’s fine!” Hawks stumbled over his words between gasping breaths before holding a deep one to recover his composure and giving a respectful bow. “Nox, she’s… she’s fine, and I’m so sorry it’s so sudden, but I need to speak with you, Sir. Urgently.”

All Might knew very little about the teen before him, but it struck a chord when his head lifted and wild, golden eyes met his. Something in Hawks’ pleading stare made the hair rise on the back of his neck. Before, he’d been unable to see the girl he turned over to the HPSC in good faith that she’d be appropriately cared for. Because of this boy, he now had the chance to see her weekly and watch her grow into the fine young heroine he knew she could be. 

He wasn’t an idiot, and he knew from their conversations that Nox was sweet to this kid, so he would have heard the winged child out either way. But whatever it was, the way the Hawks rushed towards him meant it couldn’t be good.

All Might nodded, opening the door to the visitation room set up specifically for him and Nox - supervision free, though Nox never did trust that reality. Furrowing his brows, he motioned Hawks inside.

“Let’s talk.”

Hawks’ eyes flicked to the door as the top hero opened it. Taking a deep breath, he gathered his nerves before stepping inside. While the room had its standard HPSC sterility, it was pretty cozy. There was a long couch with comfort items like soft blankets and pillows - even a jaguar plush. There were bean bags, books, and a table with various board games or art tools - it even looked like All Might had been helping Nox with her calligraphy. The atmosphere was warm, and while some items were meant for a much younger Nox, it was a place where a parent and child could bond. 

Hawks sat at the table, glancing at his surroundings as he worried his lip between his teeth. He needed to ensure that All Might understood the severity of the situation. The necessary point to be made quickly, too; he couldn’t waste the country's Number One Pro Hero’s time with something so trivial as a birthday , but he hoped it meant more because it was her . On top of that, he was desperate for answers that he hoped All Might would provide. 

“Thank you for meeting with me, sir,” Hawks started, wings flaring as a nervous twitch. “I need your help. Nox… she hasn’t been the same since her heat.”

Oh, god, Nox has a heat? Is this a sex talk? The older hero felt a brief internal panic, hidden behind his trademark grin. Despite his age and his bond with the girl he considered his ward, he felt ill-equipped to deal with such a conversation. The topic of sexuality in general made him uncomfortable; heteromorph biology just put him further out of his element.

“Well…” He began to answer, picking his words carefully. “I imagine she’s sore and warm. I think that would make anyone a little curt. I don’t think you should take it personally and let her have some space.”

Hawks shook his head, expression serious but eyes filled with concern.

“No, it’s more than that, sir,” Hawks started, brows furrowing in concentration. “They had her locked up. In solitary. They treated her like she was going to turn, I don’t know, savage, I guess?”

Hawks took another breath. The silence from the pro in front of him made him uneasy, and his wings flared and twitched again. His gaze dropped, expression hardening as he tried to keep it together. He didn’t want to ramble and tell-all, not to someone who had a million more important things to do than worry about him and some girl he was friends with. 

“It’s more than that,” he continued, words beginning to spill out in desperation. “They treated her with Ketamine and cauterized her fallopian tubes, too. She has always had nightmares, but they’ve been worse lately. She’s not taking care of herself as well as she used to; not eating as much…”

He trailed off, biting his lip harder. Red feathers fluffed despite his best efforts to self-regulate, but he was failing. He had made considerable progress in his work towards equanimity, but when it came to Nox, he struggled. The weight felt insurmountable until a firm hand was finally placed on his shoulder. It was a simple gesture, but for a young Hawks, it felt like he was finally getting help with his responsibility, like he was afforded a moment to simply breathe .

“She’s not been herself, sir, and the HPSC won’t let her out of the facility for anything,” Hawks choked in a strained voice, finally meeting the light blue gaze of his best friend’s benefactor with tears just begging to form in the corners of his eyes. “I’m worried about her. She’s been shutting down, and I can’t reach her. I can’t stand to see her like this, and I don’t know what to do, but I have to try. Getting her out is the best thing I can think of, but it’s like… like she’s been caged.”

“I thought that, I don’t know, maybe I could take her out for some kind of treat, like ice cream,” Hawks muttered, his gaze dropping as the absurdity of his idea washed over him. He knew it was a stupid idea ; it wouldn’t improve things, but it was the only thing he could think of. “And then maybe we could walk through Ohori Park and maybe sit at the Ukimi pavilion and just talk, away from all of this.”

A fantastic idea . All Might pretended to ponder the question, even though he knew his answer. Getting Nox out of the compound would be good for her - it would benefit anyone . Even after removing the simple psychological component, Nox still had a quirk derived from a wildcat. Taking her to a park could be an enrichment activity. However, if the HPSC had her on such a tight leash, they’d probably need to lock down the park. It hurt his heart to hear she was treated so strictly, but he understood their caution.  

No wonder she liked this kid .

“Have you asked Mr. Mera for leave?” All Might questioned, trying to come off as indifferent to the request. Of course, he’d love to take the girl he almost viewed as his ward for a day out, but he couldn’t be too eager. 

“I did,” Hawks answered, brows knit in his concern as he looked up again with a pleading gaze. “They don’t want her to leave; they’ve made that clear. They say she’s too volatile to be around civilians.”

Hawks took a deep breath, trying to calm the desperation in his voice. Nox needed this, even if only for a day. Fresh air and sunlight would do her good; the city's smells would be a new experience for her. If anyone could make this happen, it was All Might, so he needed to stay calm and eloquent for her sake.

“Please, sir,” he continued, red wings ruffling anxiously. “I just want to be able to take her out for a bit. I’ll figure out how to pay for it. I know asking you to intercede is a lot, but I just want to make her feel better. Please.”

Nox? Volatile? That was news to All Might. He had known her to be aloof and distrustful, perhaps even a little prickly as a defense mechanism, but consistently so. Nox was predictable, which made her easy to understand. By the sound of it, they hadn’t been letting her out for PR or other training-related excursions. Maybe the need to get her out was more profound than just some kid with a crush planning a date he was clueless about.

“You’ve put quite a bit of thought into this already, haven’t you?” All Might pondered.

“Yes, I have,” Hawks nodded, his wings drooping as his gaze returned to the floor. “She needs the freedom, All Might. She needs to breathe.”

Hawks sighed and leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees with his hands folded in front of him. He’d been planning this since she was taken for solitary confinement. He was tired of the run-around the organization was giving him about her; some ‘past’ no one wants to put words to, outside of saying that she was found with villains. Hawks’ father was a villain—a murderer, even—— and they let him out. It didn’t make sense, but he knew she needed to be outside for her own good.  The situation was frustrating, and the perceived injustice weighed heavily on him.

All Might probably thinks this is silly, he thought, a frown settling over his face. It felt important to him, even if it was just a little thing. Yet that nagging doubt kept saying that it was a waste of time; that he was wasting a top hero’s time. 

“I know it’s a lot to ask of you, sir. I just can’t shake that she needs this and I’m… desperate to help her,” Hawks muttered, carding a hand anxiously through his hair. “She’s not the same. She’s not my Nox anymore.”

Your Nox? He probably doesn’t even realize… All Might touched his chin and stroked it in feigned contemplation. His mind was already made up on this situation; the idea of taking ‘his’ ward out for the day was indeed favorable. Instead, he considered the young teen before him and his relationship to Nox. The child cared about her in ways he didn’t fully grasp. While the budding relationship wasn’t something he wanted to hinder, the reality was that he wouldn’t likely be able to give them much space.

“I believe I could work something out with Mr. Mera,” he posited, raising his finger to emphasize his points. “There will be chaperones, so I trust you to be on your best behavior?”

He was less concerned about what two fourteen-year-olds might be getting up to under his purview when they finally tasted the hint of freedom a relaxed day out might bring. Nox showed little interest in general intimacy, though he knew she was close with Hawks. Even if there was a strong pull, the boy seemed very respectful and unlikely to touch her like that . As far as his analysis was concerned, the worst he had to worry about in that department was awkward kissing and hand-holding. 

No, he was more worried about who might come for her .

Hawks’ wings perked up at the approval as a hesitant smile crept across his face. “Thank you. I promise we’ll be on our best behavior and… and you can tell Mr. Mera that I will take full responsibility for her!”

Hawks knew this wasn’t a permanent solution, but the thought of letting her be in nature for the first time since he’d known her made him feel hopeful. He wasn’t sure how Nox would react; she could take his head off for it. But he hoped it would be enough to remind her that she was loved and help her heal. Maybe, for that day, things could go back to how they had been before her estrus, before their relationship had changed. Even if he were holding on to a past that he could never have, he hoped she would at least appreciate the gesture and see a life behind these concrete walls for her. 

All Might’s eyes widened as he heard Hawks’ willingness to take responsibility for her. A piece of his heart broke; this child, who was not even high school-aged, was taking responsibility for someone who was his peer . It didn’t sit right with him. He knew Nox could sometimes be a handful, but to think that responsibility fell to a child; well, he’d certainly be having words with Yokumiru about that.

“While I appreciate you’re willingness to vouch for Young Nox,” All Might started firmly, hoping to ease the sense of responsibility on this young man’s shoulders. “And the heroic spirit you possess, I would prefer that be directed to enjoying yourselves.”

Hawks’ feathers ruffled as his smile faded. The HPSC always came first for them, and he couldn’t help but wonder if the older hero understood the gravity of their situation. He and Nox were trained for a purpose; they weren’t like regular teenagers, and part of his duty was to protect her . He was her field partner, protector, and confidant; his job was to keep her grounded and under control. It was unfathomable that someone was so against him taking responsibility for her.

His golden gaze fell, cast down towards the floor again. He didn’t know what to say, but knew he had to take care of Nox. She needed him, and he wasn’t going to abandon her. He had spent six years by her side and knew her better than anyone else. He had to accept that responsibility, right? 

He wanted to argue, but finally began to rationalize what All Might was saying. This was about Nox’s happiness, and it would help her find happiness again if he could be happy too. That’s what he had to mean, right?

“Thanks,” Hawks said, with a soft sigh. “I’ll make sure she has fun.”

All Might stifled a sigh. There was so much about their relationship that he did not understand and may never truly understand. Whether it was a directive from HPSC or simply a responsibility that Hawks felt was owed to her, as someone who cared for her, was unclear to him; it could be a mix of both. But maybe faking it until you make it would apply in this situation; if she saw Hawks enjoying himself, she’d start to enjoy herself, and in turn, maybe the enjoyment Hawks felt would become genuine. 

The kids deserved to relax for once.

“Can you tell me why you feel so responsible for her?” All Might questioned.

Hawks swallowed deeply at the question, throat tight and constricted as he choked out, “I… she… I care about her.”

Of course, that wasn’t the whole answer. Hawks wasn’t ready to share his true feelings with anyone, not even Nox. It was still too personal, too raw, too unclear . Besides, it was better not to let something silly like emotions cloud his judgment. 

The truth was, even beyond the HPSCs directive, he did have a sense of duty towards her that was all his own—a deep one, because he knew what it was like to feel alone—to feel like the people meant to protect and nurture you were turning their backs on you.

He hesitated again before continuing, knowing he couldn’t tell All Might the unobfuscated truth around their meeting. “When I first met Nox… I felt like I had to protect her. She was always tense and afraid, and I wanted to make her feel safe more than anything.”

She’s my best friend.
She means everything to me.
She helped me be better.
I just want to make her happy.

“I guess, in a way, I feel bad for everything they’ve done to her,” he finally admitted, looking away with clenched fists. “I know she’s been hurt, and there’s something more to her origins than they tell me. It doesn’t make me more mature to handle her; she’s just misunderstood, and I want to ensure she’s treated right. It’s like they blame her for something.” 

And there it was . All Might sighed, shoulders sagging as he finally leaned back in his chair. Of course. He knew some distrust was warranted, but nothing in Nox’s demeanor led him to believe she was a threat. He’d been granted an opportunity to watch her grow, hear her thoughts; as far as he could tell, she didn’t even remember what happened before she was brought here. There was no reason not to give the girl some freedom, to let her be the hero he knew she was. 

He would speak with the HPSC representatives. If they continued on this course, it would be a self-fulfilling prophecy. No one enjoys being caged like this .

“That…” All Might started carefully. “Is because of how I found her.”

Hawks’ feathers ruffled, his head slowly turning back towards the hero seated across from him. He knew only enough about Nox’s past to understand how much he didn’t know; secrets buried that she couldn’t remember, and conjectures from separate parties that had been through the rumor mill so much it was impossible to separate truth. Knowing what she had been through, knowing the truth and not just whatever boogeyman the HPSC cooked up would be monumental - it was something he had to know, for both of their sakes.

“What happened to her, All Might?” Hawks began quietly, unsure if the Hero could tell him what even Nox did not know. “I want to know more. To understand her better.”

All Might sighed, running his hand down his face as he recalled that day, his voice low and solemn. “There’s still so much I don’t know, kiddo. But I’ll tell you what I know beyond a reasonable doubt…”

An hour passed, with Hawks at full attention while All Might told him about the day he found Nox. The where, the state she was in, and those in her immediate vicinity. Ultimately, his story left more questions than it gave answers. 

Hawks couldn’t see why that would be a reason to keep her locked up like she was. Nox’s only crime was that she was a victim of circumstance, so punishing her for being in that situation did not make sense in his mind. All Might had given the girl a second shot at a real life, and she deserved more.

“I won’t let her suffer like that again,” Hawks stated firmly, resolve cemented.

There was still so much unknown. But what Hawks had learned today, one thing was sure:

Nox could never know.

Chapter Text

Time slowed to a crawl; the days dragged on for what felt like ages.

Yokumiru had grumbled about approving their outing, though it was also made clear that not only would the park be closed down, but there would be an armed entourage with them, along with both All Might and Yokumiru himself. While he had seemed more concerned about what Hawks and Nox might get up to, All Might was more concerned with who might come looking for them. With any luck, the Pro Hero’s concerns would never come to fruition. Armed with knowledge that had been kept from him until he met with the country’s Number One, Hawks was willing to accept the terms of the arrangement. 

When the day finally came, Hawks had been up since the sun peeked over the horizon. He spent his time meticulously grooming himself, starting with a thorough shower. He scrubbed every inch of his body to remove any excess oils or grime and eliminate any lingering scents, wanting to smell only of himself for her. Each feather was perfectly groomed and in place, and each hair was styled and controlled with precision.

Where he struggled was with his attire. He had a deep inclination towards a silk button-down shirt, a red tie, and black slacks. It didn’t matter that Nox was utilitarian about clothing and preferred function and comfort over style; a part of him would hope that seeing how well he could clean up might catch her attention. He didn’t know why he felt like it would get her attention, or why that felt so important at that moment, but he told himself it was because it would snap her out of the funk she was in. His other option was the grey V-neck and nice black jeans with comfortable trainers. Logically, walking around Ohiri Park in spring while wearing slacks and dress shoes was incredibly unappealing, but he struggled to give up the white silk top. Ultimately, he opted to wear the trainers, black jeans, and the grey V-neck, but he wore the button-down as an overshirt. 

Even if he decided not to wear the silk shirt like he imagined, draping it over his shoulders like a jacket was enough, and he carried the hope that she might notice. 

When All Might and Yokumiru showed up, Hawks was ecstatic. The anxious energy he exuded was almost palpable. The teen was so focused on making sure everything was perfect that he ushered them in and just as quickly forgot about them. Both men were dressed for PR; All Might in his classic goldenrod pinstripe suit, while Yokumiru wore his usual black suit. While Hawks frantically prepared for the day, the men took a moment to sit at the counter bar and sip their coffee.

What made this all even more special, in Hawks’ mind, was that Nox had no idea. She’d get to go outside and see the world beyond what the HPSC had created for her. There was a future waiting for them, and it was worth fighting for. Through careful maneuvering, Hawks had managed to get them to agree to let her out of the facility and off the property.

He knew she needed this, and he was excited to spend the day with her as far away from the HPSC and the harm they’d done as possible. The air buzzed around him while he fought the instinct to fly—she’d be free for a day, and he was the one to give that to her. While he could hardly contain his excitement, he kept reminding himself that today was about her.

Looking at the time, he took a deep breath. Then, he exhaled slowly, grounding himself in his purpose. Moving to Nox’s door, he rapped gently in the pattern they’d decided on together ages ago; something he knew she’d know was him, and not Ren or another member of the organization staff. When he received no response, he slowly pushed the door open.

Nox was still asleep, buried under her blankets and snuggled up tightly to her pillows. His heart fluttered at the sight, feathers rising alongside his heart rate. She looked like a bud before bloom—tranquilly suspended, wrapped in a cocoon of petals and kissed by morning light. It was cute, making his lips quirk up into a small smile as he quietly approached her bed. As much as he wanted to crawl into bed with her to snuggle up and just be close, he had gone over the HPSC’s head securing her outings, the consequences of which were looming but not yet fully realized. Whatever Ren had planned for him, it was worth letting her enjoy the sunshine, air, and life that was out there.

He wanted to show her the life they could have when they aged out and were no longer confined to the compound.

“Hey, kitten,” he crooned sweetly, carefully peeling the blanket burrito apart. “It’s time to get up. We’ve got plans.”

Nox groaned quietly as the blankets were slowly unwrapped and peeled off her body. She fought him at first, trying to keep the blankets over her head rather than face the light of day beginning to shine through her small airflow window. Not taking no for an answer, Hawks chuckled softly as he continued to untangle the blankets from her body. She could fight the blankets, but not his resolve. Eventually, his patience and gentle persistence prevailed, and he finally got a good look at her messy hair and rich, sapphire-blue eyes. Those eyes, which had once been sharp and focused, had become dull and vacant, as though sleep had made its home there rather than leaving for the day.

She blinked slowly, gaze unfocused and thick with sleep—and beneath it, the emptiness of someone who was forgetting how to hope.

“What are you on about, birdie?” she grumbled tiredly, pressing the heel of her palm to rub the sleep out of one eye. “We’re on recovery and can’t leave the dorm; what are you even talking about with ‘plans’?”

“It’s a surprise, kitty-cat,” he chimed quietly, excitement and persistence carried in the sweet tone while he ran a hand through her hair to fix it. “Now, come on! Let’s get you ready to go!”

Not wanting to ruin the surprise, he said nothing else about what those plans were, but he was hopeful that their outing would give her something good to hold on to. He flashed her a sweet, playful smile as he set one knee right on the edge of her mattress. Offering her a hand to try to coax her out of her isolation, he was trying to be gentle in how he pressed her, hoping she’d do what he wanted her to do without resorting to the manipulative tactics the HPSC had been training him on. 

“It’s a good surprise, I promise, Nox,” he encouraged, seeing her begrudgingly accept his hand. “But we have to move quickly. So as much as I love your purrito impersonation, you need to get ready.”

Letting him pull her up, Nox grumbled in frustration. Her pajamas hung loosely from her frame, and the rosettes on her arms were on full display with her sleeping tank. He could tell she wanted to ask what he was planning, but she also knew that he wasn’t going to share that with her. If she had any curiosity left in her, she’d just have to follow his lead to find out. 

Hawks ushered her to her bathroom, started the shower, and set the temperature just as he knew she liked it. He began to fret over her bathroom, hanging the clean towels and taking the old ones for laundry. The few times he caught her gaze, he was met with annoyance, but that didn’t deter him. He picked out her nicest attire: black ripstop cargo pants, a white tank top, and a black denim trucker jacket. While it made him feel painfully overdressed, Nox not only didn’t enjoy finer fashion; her comfort mattered more. 

“I know it’s been tough, being here. I want to do something special for you.” He tried his best to keep upbeat. He had been waiting for this moment for a long time and was not about to let the HPSC ruin it. Sighing, he looked back towards her with a glimmer of hope in his eyes. “Please, just humor me and take a shower. If you’re still struggling with bending, I’ll help you get dressed.”

Above all, he was glad that she was at least trying today; that she was willing to get out of bed. That alone gave him a massive sense of relief. He would sit with her for as long as she needed. She’d at least gotten enough independence back that he could support her with his feathers and keep his back to the tub - something that also relieved him. It was hard not to want to peek at her, wondering how her recovery might be progressing and how the changes in her body reflected the fight she was enduring.

From the kitchen, the chaperones heard the shower kick on, but saw hide nor hair of the winged prodigy.

“What do you think they’re up to in there?” Yokumiru asked the pro hero next to him. “You ever think that, maybe…?”

All Might shook his head. “Not at all; Hawks is too respectful, and a cactus is far more cuddly than Nox is.”

“They sleep together, sometimes,” Yokumiru muttered, earning a quirked eyebrow from the Number One. “I mean… like, actually sleeping.”

All Might’s brows furrowed at that idea, but it wasn’t news. He’d heard from Nox herself that being near Hawks helped with the nightmares, and it was nothing more. To assume that it was inherently romantic or, god forbid, sexual, was just an old way of thinking.

“He’s probably just in there to help her so she doesn’t hurt herself after the surgery, Mera,” All Might suggested dryly, already having had plenty of words with the man over the past few days.

The water suddenly shut off.

“See?” All Might chimed, his playful persona returning. “Nothing to worry about! No one is that fast!”

Yokumira rolled his eyes, rolling his head in the motion to emphasize his exasperation with the seemingly clueless Number One. “Not everyone has your super stamina, you know…”

Unlike Hawks, who enjoyed a long shower, unless it was a bath she could submerge herself in and indulge her semi-aquatic feline needs, Nox was very utilitarian. She was quick and efficient, in and out in ten minutes. When the water shut off, Hawks used a feather to offer her a towel, keeping his back to her and eyes fixed to the wall.

“You’re doing great, Nox,” he said softly, trying to quell any frustration she might have as his feathers draped the fluffy towel over her shoulders. While he did his best to hide it, he was beginning to feel antsy. “All Might and Mera are here, too.”

“All Might,” Nox murmured as she froze, finally realizing she missed her last meeting with him.

As soon as she stopped, he started. His feathers continued drying her off while his back was turned. The conclusion he came to is that she couldn’t be given a chance to wallow in whatever it was that had her. He wasn’t going to give her a moment to pause, to think, or feel—not yet, anyway. 

“Please don’t stress out over that. I already talked to All Might. It’s okay that you missed the meeting,” Hawks soothed, his wings unfurling slightly in his confidence. “He’s not upset. He was worried about you and just wants you to feel better, too. I promise everything is okay; please just trust me on this. We want to do something nice for you.” 

The guilt was there, he could tell, and it would swallow her whole if he didn’t keep her moving. His wings flicked as he started considering time and pace. Drying her with his feathers was useful, but he needed to get her going ; they needed to leave, ASAP, before she turned back towards isolation. He didn’t know what it was like for her before they met—All Might wasn’t even aware, and she wouldn’t talk to him about it, either. But whatever drove her to push everyone away and shut down was surely rooted in survival. Whether that was her life before the HPSC or Ren’s experiments, it was unknown. But he assumed it was a mix of both. 

“Okay, so, here’s what you’re gonna do. First: I grabbed your nicest outfit that was still comfy because I know how you feel about fashion. Second: Shoes that aren’t boots, for once in your life.” He chimed before turning to face her again once his feathers wrapped the towel around her body. Gently cupping her cheek, he brushed his thumb under her eye, worried about how dull they were now. “No arguing today. Just trust me?”

He’d laid out the clothes he picked for her on the counter. Black leggings, her grippy no-show socks, clean undergarments, her white tank top, and black trucker jacket. The shoes in question were her black-and-white trainers, which she rarely used, even for their intended purpose. When her eyes finally met his, slightly dazed and confused, he offered her a warm smile.

“C’mon, kitten. Get dressed so we can get today started,” Hawks soothed warmly. “Thank you for humoring me. You’ll be glad you did.”

Her eyes searched his for a long moment before she swallowed and nodded. Pulling away from his hand, with the towel tightly wrapped around her form, she began to move towards the clothes he had laid out. While she was still selectively mute, it was enough to bring him a sigh of relief. She was doing it. She wasn’t shutting down again. The silence was stretching on for far longer than he would have liked. He wanted things to be relaxed and happy today, not tense and uncomfortable. But, for that to happen, he needed to know how she was feeling. He was almost tempted to say something, but he had been around Nox long enough to know that he had to pick his battles, and pushing her at this moment may not be the wisest choice.

“I’ll be just outside the door while you get dressed,” he spoke gently, turning around towards the door but pausing before stepping over the threshold. “It’s going to be okay, I promise.”

Once the door closed behind him, Hawks leaned against the wall and let his head thump with a heavy sigh. He left his feathers in there to keep an eye on her. While he wasn’t the best at distinguishing voices and interpreting speech, he could still feel the vibrations in her movements, which allowed him to ‘hear’ her. She was moving slower than usual, but she was still moving .

“I want to take you out of here,” he murmured to himself. “I want to show you that there’s balance out there—for every bad, something good.”

Instead of the usual five minutes to put on clothes, it took her closer to fifteen, but she eventually emerged. Her damp hair clung to her cheeks like petals after rain, and her eyes were still dim with exhaustion, but she seemed less tense. She’d answered the call, not with joy, but with presence. For Hawks, that was enough. It was the closest thing to Nox being her usual self he’d seen since she returned. Progress was progress.

He couldn’t help but beam at her. Even if she wasn’t fully herself yet, even if things weren’t perfect, his heart still skipped a beat when he saw her. She looked… beautiful. But there was no way he could say something like that to her. 

“You look great,” he said softly with a warm smile, holding his hand out to her. “Are you ready to go?”

“Where are we even going?” she asked quietly, voice soft but audible as she regarded his outstretched hand.

Her voice was low and flat, but it existed. The flat affect betrayed her emotional numbing, and she wasn’t glaring at Hawks’ hand the way he expected her to. But she spoke, and for him, that was a lifeline.

“I told you,” he said with a small smile. “It’s a surprise. I want to show you something.”

Hawks could tell that she was nervous, that she wasn’t looking forward to this. Snatching her hand, he held it securely in his. It didn’t matter if she pulled away. He just wanted to make sure she felt supported and to let her know he was there for her. He’d held her hand during a monsoon once when they were younger; she was terrified and holding on to him like a lifeline.

That storm eventually passed. 
He needed this one to.

“I’ll be with you the whole time,” he soothed, feeling a bit of resistance when he wrapped his fingers around her palm. “Don’t worry. I’ll protect you.”

Her eyes rolled at the closing statement, her hand twitching in his like she wanted to pull away. It reminded him of his failures that day, and he couldn’t help but wonder if perhaps Nox was holding on to some kind of resentment or hostility. He knew she had a point, and he had failed to protect her from Ren. But she should also know that he tried his damndest. When he came to, he didn’t have the control necessary to reach her—and it haunted him. She had every right to be skeptical and doubt that he could protect her, and he wasn’t naive enough to believe he could take on the HPSC alone.

But for her, he would give it his all if he needed to. He wanted to protect her not just from the world or Ren, but from the story she was telling herself. That she was alone in the fight, where he didn’t try, and she realized she wasn’t worth saving. 

There was a lot that they needed to talk about. Nox would learn the truth—that he had tried to reach her on the other end of the solitary door. Maybe then she would understand how he felt. But before he could hope to reach her, she needed to relax and calm her nerves. The inner turmoil she was grappling with was evident in her body language. He didn’t want to force her, but he wanted her to come with him.

“I know it doesn’t feel like it right now, but I’m still here,” he admitted quietly. “I know I can’t protect you from everything. But I will sure as hell try.”

Chapter Text

The ride was oddly calm. For her first time out, Nox barely glanced at the world beyond the tinted windows of the Limo. She seemed distant and unfocused. Yokumiru and All Might sat on opposite benches near the driver, while Hawks shared the rearmost bench with Nox, giving the two some space as they chatted about an upcoming provisional exam. 

For a moment, Hawks couldn’t help but smile as the scenery passed by. He was with his best friend, on her birthday, and had negotiated fair treatment for her. She was going to see the blossoms, and it was because of him. In a way, it was like a dream come true. At the same time, though, he was worried about Nox. She seemed more checked out than usual, like she was a world away. It was her first time out of the complex, and he was expecting her to at least look out the window. 

The sense of helplessness gnawed at him ruthlessly. He couldn’t shake off the feeling that this was all a mistake. All he’d wanted was to do something nice for Nox—to help her—and now he was afraid that wasn’t going to happen. Since she had gotten out of the shower, he’d felt it begin to rise: guilt, regret, doubt, and the urge to take it all back, even though he knew he couldn’t say that to her, either. 

He just wanted to help.
To see her smile again.
That’s all.

Wanting to pull her back into the moment, Hawks slowly reached over and rested his hand on hers, lacing their fingers together. His thumbs drew little circles over her knuckles, hoping to give her some kind of comfort. They had been so happy together when they were younger—it was them against the HPSC, the organization that had put Nox in this state—and he hoped that was still somewhere inside her. He knew she had been down and wished there was something he could do to help. 

That small gesture roused her. She looked towards their hands first, then up at Hawks, eyes still a little red-rimmed. 

Back at the dorms, something had broken in her the moment she saw All Might standing at the counter bar. The man’s warm smile and gentle greeting led her to rush towards him and bury her face in his abs. Nox broke down; unexpected, raw, and impossible to ignore. It was something no one quite knew how to deal with. She repeatedly apologized to the older hero for missing their meeting, for not being good enough, which earned Yokumiru some sharp glares from the number one. It was quiet and short-lived, but it was a moment of raw emotional vulnerability that Hawks had not seen in years, and as All Might crooned about missing her the previous week and insisting he was just worried, part of Hawks seethed. While he knew it was an objectively unfair feeling, part of him felt like he should be the one she ran to like that, not the man who put her here.

Being a little numbed out after a moment like that was understandable, but Hawks knew she couldn’t let that keep her from enjoying her first time out of the complex since she was four. He gave her what he hoped was a reassuring smile as he tightened his grip on her hand. Ohori Park wasn’t too far away, and he wanted her to go there with her head held high. He wanted her to live here and now, with him, and not in her head.

I know you won’t believe it, but you’re safe with me. I won’t let anyone hurt you again.

He wasn’t quite sure how to handle her being so distant. He had seen her upset, but this was different. Giving her hand another gentle squeeze that he hoped would be a reminder that he was there, he continued to stroke his thumb over her hand. 

“We’re almost there,” he chimed, a warm and unwavering smile gracing his features. “I bet the flowers will be in full bloom.”

“Flowers?” she muttered gently, brows knitting slightly as she searched his features.

He nodded, his eyes never leaving hers. To prevent Nox from slipping back, he was trying to keep her engaged. If she did slip back into that shell, she wouldn’t come back to him right away. Of course, no one had told her they were going to Ohori Park. Just that they were leaving, and both Hawks’ handler and her benefactor were present. While she found herself grateful that Ren wasn’t present, part of her found the absence of her handler worrisome. 

“Yes, flowers! Cherry blossoms! They’re beautiful this time of year,” he said softly, trying to coax her out of her head as he leaned in a little closer. He needed to keep her engaged with the world around her. He needed her to engage with him. “There’s a spot in the park that has the best ones in town. I want to take you there.”

Her brows knit tightly as she processed his words. She didn’t quite seem to grasp that she was going to be outside; that this wasn’t just some transport to a different facility or dinner. This was her first step towards the PR trips she was supposed to take, towards being treated fairly compared to the other recruits. But, more importantly, she was engaging with him. 

“What are you talking about?” she muttered, notably guarded and with palpable disbelief.

“Well, you’ve never really had a chance to see them, so I thought we could today,” he explained with a gentle smile. She was engaging with him, talking with him, and it made the moment feel both lighter and hopeful. “In Shintoism, they symbolize renewal. The springtime blooms remind us that beauty doesn’t last forever. It’s like a memento mori—a bitter-sweet reminder that life is temporary and that we should enjoy it. It’s why I wanted to take you to see them.”

Her eyes narrowed a little, an expression he had learned meant skepticism. While the skepticism hurt a little, she wasn’t closing herself off again, and that was encouraging. He hoped that this would distract her from her thoughts and break whatever pattern she was stuck in. It wasn’t the first time he’d tried to break her out of an emotional loop - he’d done so when they were young kids - but it was the first time he was able to do something big rather than improvise with what little the Commission would give them. He wanted to make the most of today.

“So… flowers,” Nox muttered, voice flat but not dismissive. 

His heart fluttered a little when her eyes narrowed. Even if her lack of enthusiasm stung, he knew it wasn’t about him. The cynical opinion, even if harsh in her low mood, was a sign of her slowly coming back. It was a large part of who she was, and he liked that about her. She was a challenge, one that he didn’t mind accepting. A tough nut to crack, but she seemed more alive. There was some interest in those beautiful sapphire eyes, and he was so grateful for that. It felt like a significant victory, and he couldn’t stop smiling at her.

Honestly, he was just happy she was talking to him.

“Yeah, flowers,” he chimed playfully, hoping she would understand why he wanted to show her. “Culture aside, they’re amazing to see. The petals are fragile, but they’re beautiful while they’re here, as brief as it is. But it’s more than that; it’s about walking through the park together and getting some fresh air. I want you to experience it.”

“You’ll see,” he said simply, eyes never leaving hers. He took Nox’s other hand in his, wanting her to feel his warmth and feel that he was there for her. “It’s going to be good, I promise.”

I mean it, I really do.

“I dunno, birdie,” she sighed, gaze drifting to the two older men who appeared to be arguing.

There was a part of her that wanted to pull away from him; he could sense it. But her gaze did drift back to his before she flashed a very faint smile as the Limo pulled into the metered street parking. Her brows were still furrowed, but the outer corners had raised. It meant she was humoring him because she valued him; she would do this for him. 

He smiled back, a feeling of warmth smoldering in his chest before shooting through the rachis of every feather and causing his wings to fluff. It wasn’t a full smile from Nox, but he was willing to take it. He knew she was humouring him, but he didn’t care and gave her hands a gentle squeeze as the Limo came to a stop. 

She was going to enjoy this, whether she liked it or not.

Leaning in, he whispered in her ear so All Might and Yokumiru wouldn’t be able to hear, “I’m right by your side, Kitten. You can do this.”

When the driver opened the door, he stepped out. Nox squinted against the bright light, rubbing her eyes. The delay gave the older men a chance to disembark, each giving her a reassuring touch on the shoulder as they moved past her. She blinked a few times, seeing All Might and Yokumiru standing alert and at attention like a personal security detail, and Hawks’ hand outstretched, offering to help her out of the vehicle. 

Tentatively, she put her hand in Hawks’ and allowed him to guide her out of the darkened interior and into the daylight. He watched her closely, trying to gauge her reaction to the environment. This was their moment: a shared first experience together. He knew she would be cautious, but he was thrilled she agreed to this, and once she adjusted, he was eager to hear her thoughts. It was, after all, the first time she had been outside of the complex since she was a toddler, and the first time she’d have ever seen this. 

“So,” he said after a short pause, voice soft but eager. “What do you think?”

The scene that greeted Nox was genuinely breathtaking and almost surreal. Tiny pink petals were pulled along the ground by a soft breeze, occasionally dancing on the wind or pulled in acrobatic loops. The crisp, cool air nipped at her skin, sending a shiver down her body. The grey, overcast sky was nearly blinding, and she squinted against the brightness. Taking a deep breath, she took in the smells around her. The fragrance of greenery, soil, water, and a slight almond-like scent carried on the wind. Her eyes closed for a moment, and, involuntarily, she sucked air in through her cheeks, pulling the fragrance against that special olfactory organ in her soft palate—a Flehmen.

Hawks stood beside her, watching her take in all the sensory details of the outside world in awe. Her Flehmen made his wings fluff with excitement; he had been worried that maybe she wouldn’t like her gift at first. But each time she sucked in air through her cheeks, breathed in a little deeper, or sniffed at the air, it felt gratifying. But when the sun peeked out through the clouds, illuminating and warming their skin, his heart stopped for a moment before coming back with twice the force. 

For the first time, he felt like he saw her. 

Her ethereal pale skin shone with a subtle warm glow, almost softening the harshness of her rosettes, but not trying to erase them. The way her nostrils flared when she sniffed the air, with her head tilted slightly upward. When her eyes slowly opened, the nictitating membranes slowly retreated to the inner corner of her eyes. The black pigment on her waterline and sharp predatory gaze seemed more accentuated, natural in that moment, and the rich blue pigment of her eyes seemed to brighten and shimmer. 

Beautiful.

It was like watching a true apex predator wake, stretch, and assess its surroundings. Now it was obvious that she had been deprived of the outside far too long, and his handler was bearing witness to that. Hawks was still attuned to her apprehension, but seeing this part of her stir and make its presence known gave him hope. It was the beginning of a new life for her, and whatever debt he owed in return was worth it. 

He hadn’t been aware of how much he was staring or the warmth of his cheeks; he was only even vaguely aware of his heart hammering in his chest. He’d never seen Nox look so… free. She was almost natural, as if the park were made for her. He wanted to say something—anything—but the words died in his throat, choked off by awe. 

It was only when he felt a hand on his shoulder that he was snapped out of his trance. Turning to look, he saw the knowing smile of All Might. Hawks nodded, taking the hint and silently thanking the Number One. He’d already asked their chaperones to stay back a little bit to give them what privacy could be afforded to them, but All Might was right to ground him back in reality. Swallowing hard, he turned back to Nox.

“Do you like it?” he rasped quietly, trying not to overstimulate her. 

“It’s…” she started quietly, tone still distant but beginning to change. “It’s different.”

She took a moment to look up to the sky and the surrounding buildings. The greenery dotted the urban landscape—lush, unexpected, and alive. Then, there was the sky. Even with the tall buildings, the sky felt endless. She listened; the sounds of seabirds, tits, water, and the breeze through various foliage were a promise hidden beneath the city's overpowering din. Sucking air in through her cheeks, her eyes drifted closed. The smell of fumes and concrete was pervasive and almost sickening, but beneath it was the plant life, the soil, and what she imagined might be the flowers.

Hawks could see the wheels turning as she took in her surroundings. It was as if, slowly, she were coming back to life; her voice, her posture, her entire demeanor shifted. The smile that spread across his face crinkled his eyes while he watched as she breathed in this world that was so new to her—her curiosity like a balm for his soul. Each sensory detail, each gust of fresh air, was like a quiet resurrection of the girl he’d known since childhood. If there was ever any doubt that this was precisely what she needed, it was gone now.

“The buildings are tall, but there’s space between them,” Nox murmured, sniffing the air. “It’s so bright out here, and the world smells… so different.”

Hawks felt so proud of her for stepping out into the world. Even though it was only two feet on the ground outside the vehicle and she hadn’t entered the park yet, she tried, and it paid off. As she continued to take in the experience around her, Hawks could almost feel All Might’s sadness radiating behind him and bringing him back down to reality. 

It wasn’t right; Nox should have had the chance to experience this earlier.

“Yeah, it’s different out here,” he agreed, nodding. It really did smell different—it smelled alive. “Pretty nice though, huh?”

He nudged her slightly with his shoulder before touching a strand of her black hair behind her ear absentmindedly. While his heart ached at her description of a reality he knew all too well, he was happy for her. So much had changed for her in such a short amount of time, and he was able to give her something beautiful. Even if the city itself were overwhelming, she seemed to be enjoying the change of pace.

When Nox turned back to him with a slightly dazed expression, he gave her hand an encouraging squeeze and whispered his encouragement, “I know it’s a lot, kitten. Just take your time.”

Hawks wanted this moment to last as long as possible. The wonder in Nox’s eyes and the way her expression morphed as something primal dawned. As she took in the world, he finally understood what quirk fulfillment meant. He felt like he could watch her forever as she experienced the outside world for the first time—not as a future hero, not as her field partner, but as someone who cared. It was beautiful.

She was beautiful.

Standing back as the silent observer and chaperone, All Might smiled at the pair. He was heartbroken that this was the first experience of anything outside of the complex; the world was a beautiful place, and Nox had a wonderful heart that deserved to see that. Together, she and Hawks were something special. The way he guided her back towards herself, helped her awaken, showed her the world outside—made his role in Nox’s life truly appreciable, and All Might had a new respect for the boy his ward had chosen to let in, closure to her guarded heart than even he had gotten. 

They were the embodiment of duality: sun and moon.

“She’s not a recruit, you know,” Yokumiru stated softly, keeping his voice low as the two young teens explored this moment of sensory awakening. “There’s a reason we keep her close, and Ren cares about results above all. I didn’t sign up to cage kids. But I did sign up to keep them safe. Watching them, I wonder if I know the difference anymore.”

“She’s not a threat, Mera,” All Might nodded softly. “But, Ren won’t see it any other way. He’s afraid of her. We have an obligation to protect her, yes, but we also have an obligation to let her live.”

All Might’s brows furrowed as he listened to Yokumiru. He understood the dilemma the man was facing and the delicate line between protection and control that blurred too easily in their line of work. But seeing Nox now, smiling and laughing with someone her age, made something shift. This wasn’t just about keeping her safe from her possible origins. This was about giving her a chance to live. It hurt to think about what they had put the young girl through. It was wrong, and he had been so blind, but not anymore.

“They deserve more than this,” All Might murmured. “Just look at them—chasing petals on the wind. They’re still kids, yet they’re carrying burdens even too heavy for adults. Nox is unknowingly carrying her father's sins, and Hawks? That boy feels responsible for her.”

“That would no doubt also be Ren’s doing,” Yokumiru added solemnly.

Yokumiru’s gaze lingered on Nox, taking in the way her fingers traced the leaves of a shrub on the meridian outside of the park, near one of the entrances. While she interacted with an almost child-like wonder, Hawks stayed close—never crowding, but always within arm’s reach. The way the two razzed and harassed each other playfully made their youth painfully obvious, something that was easy to overlook when constantly reviewing their metrics. This was freedom, and though it wasn’t permanent, the hope was that this moment would spark something in her. Maybe she’d fight for it harder now that she tasted it, and perhaps she’d fight harder to protect it.

All Might sighed as he looked at Yokumiru, his usual sunny expression dulled by the bitter undertones of the moment. He heard stories from fellow heroes; whispers in dark corners and passing remarks—but seeing it for himself was something else entirely. The way the HPSC was treating Nox was wrong, and he had only just realized it. He knew what Mera was saying was the truth, but he didn’t like it. What he had always wanted for her was happiness, just as much as Hawks wanted that for her now.

“She’s been locked away too long, Mera,” All Might added before turning his gaze back towards the two teens. He observed how Nox hesitantly reached out for a leaf drifting past her, and how Hawks watched her as if she were the only thing that mattered in the world. “They needed this. Not just for her quirk, but for them. Just look at them.”

“So, you see it, too, huh?” Yokumiru chuckled dryly. “Hawks has no idea how he feels. I hate to say it, but my boy is clueless.” He took a brief pause, shaking his head, before adding, “You know… this whole outwing was his idea, and his alone. He really is attuned to her.”

All Might’s posture relaxed, tension easing as he let his thoughts drift to Hawks and Nox. The way the boy looked at who he considered his ward stirred something almost paternal in his chest. They were young and naive, unsullied by the darker realities of the world. Eventually, experiences would change that—it was an inevitability—but he could only hope the duo did not become jaded. He was particularly worried for Nox, that her experience within this organization would snuff out her hope.

This outing was their first step to preventing that, giving them both a moment to experience activities that would be normal for their age.

Hawks was always hovering nearby, never too far that Nox couldn’t reach for him if she needed reassurance, but giving her space to explore this new world at her own pace and lead him. As eager as he was to get to the park, there was so much that was new outside the nearby park entrance, and he didn’t rush her. He was a good kid, with a good heart, and for All Might, that went a long, long way.

“They complement each other well,” All Might murmured. “They bring out the best in one another.”

“He cares for her deeply,” Mera added with a low, contemplative tone. “Maybe more than he lets on, maybe even more than she knows. He’s fiercely protective of her; squared up to Ren more than a few times, and I hazard to think what would have happened if Yamamoto hadn’t intervened the day she was taken for surgery.” 

“He’s an interesting kid. He has good instincts,” All Might agreed fondly, having seen how protective the boy was. “Even if he doesn’t realize what those instincts are telling him, yet. Give it time.”

“The best instincts we’ve seen in our wards,” Mera concurred. “And a crush bigger than his head.”

“Well, as they say: opposites attract,” All Might added with a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. All Might understood now; Hawks had gone above and beyond, fighting for this moment without even realizing what he was fighting for, or how much it meant for both of them. “He has absolutely no idea. But that’s part of the charm, isn’t it? They’re figuring it out—together.”

“That boy would set himself on fire if it meant she could have light,” Yokumiru mused almost solemnly. “I just hope one day, he realizes why.”

“It breaks my heart that she’s so guarded; so closed off,” All Might sighed. < span class="allmight">“But he’s the only one she ever truly opens up to. He’s the only one she truly feels safe with.”

“Well, that’s not true,” Yokumiru corrected, shaking his head. “I think the rupture she experienced seeing you in the dorm demonstrates that. She trusts you just as much, if not more. It’s just different with him. There’s a camaraderie there; when it comes to our training regimen, they’re in it together, and only the other can ever truly understand.”

All Might considered Yokumiru’s statement as he watched the kids. Hawks had his hands shoved into his pockets as he watched her intently, glancing in their direction every few moments. There was something special between those two; something he had sensed in his meetings with Nox, but never fully appreciated until now. They weren’t just kids—they were partners in every sense of the word—even the ones that they didn’t even know existed yet.

“He understands her in a way I never could,” All Might murmured reverently. “It’s… beautiful, really.”

“And it only seems to be getting stronger,” Mera added. “You should have seen her in the limo earlier. She was so withdrawn, but when he held her hand, she looked at him like he was a lifeline. He grounded her.”

“The way Nox trusts me is different,” All Might admitted, looking towards Yokumiru, his expression more resigned. “I’m someone who saved her. But him? He makes life in that cage bearable, advocating for her in ways she doesn’t even know, while still playing by the rules. That trust between them? That’s special. We have to make sure they never lose it.”

“Even if it means we have to chaperone more of these,” Yokumiru paused, his tone almost showing his discomfort and distaste for watching two hormonal teens on their first date. Meanwhile, Hawks motioned to them eagerly, signaling that they were finally ready to enter the Japanese Garden portion of the park. “Excursions?”

All Might’s booming laugh echoed, reverberating off the building as he clapped Yokumiru on the back hard enough to make him stumble. “My friend, if this is what chaperoning looks like—watching them experience the world for the first time—then I’ll gladly suffer through a thousand more! Besides, I don’t think either of them even realizes it is a date.”

Yokumiru let out a dramatic sigh, groaning, “I guess. Just keep an eye on them, will you? I have a feeling that boy’s itching to get her alone now that she’s perked up.”

“Just look at them, Mera,” All Might added in an almost conspiratorial but still absurdly loud tone as they crossed over the meridian to the pathway. “They deserve to have these normal teenage experiences, and it’s our duty to make sure they get them. Look at her face—I’d say this was a success, don’t you?”

All Might didn’t wait for an answer before striding further ahead to join them, leaving Yokumiru no choice but to trail behind and grumble about “romanticizing insubordination” under his breath.

Chapter Text

Moments ago, she had been sniffing the air eagerly, picking up hints of pine and other familiar scents from tracking exercises. Now, Nox stood rigid beside Hawks as he waved the adults over, her eyes fixed intensely forward. The event was private, with the entirety of Ohori Park booked for their entourage and a perimeter being kept around it for her protection. Beyond the potential risks of someone collecting her on her first outing, Nox had been sequestered for far too long to integrate into the usually bustling city of Fukuoka. They’d have to build her up to crowds to make sure she wasn’t overwhelmed.

This was precisely the reason why Hawks moved closer, sensing her hesitation.

“I hear voices,” she muttered, eyes fixed intensely at the entrance of the park.

He knew she was nervous about being around people. About being outside, in places she’d never been. The park was huge, and even empty; it would be overwhelming for anyone who had never set foot out into the world, living only a curated existence within the confines of the Commission’s training facility.

“Those voices?” Hawks whispered, leaning in and bumping his shoulder against hers, then offering a grin in response to the sharp side-eye he received. “It’s just garden staff and maybe a stray cat.” He paused for a beat, looking at her with a wry smirk. “Nothing that could outrun you.”

“The staff are expecting us!” All Might chimed as he caught up to the teens, acutely aware of her frozen posture. “Except for people maintaining the park and running its facilities, it will just be the four of us today. You two have nothing to worry about.”

“And if anyone tries to bother us?” Hawks nudged her again playfully. “I’ll peck their eyes out.”

The joke was stupid. Painfully stupid. But it got a huff out of Nox anyway, which was a good sign that she was staying present. Ahead of them, All Might cleared his throat as the garden gate opened. Beyond it—tranquility. Raked gravel paths winding between ponds and pines, stone lanterns half-hidden by azaleas, and sturdy stone bridges arching over koi-filled streams.

Most importantly? Not a single sign of Ren in sight.

“Unless you think we need back-up?” Hawks continued to jest. “I hear Number One Heroes are decent at crowd control."

Hawks threw a playful glance towards All Might and Mera. He took Nox’s hand in his, thumb brushing over her knuckles in a silent I’ve got you.

Nox hesitated, still frozen in place, but quickly acquiesced to Hawks’ gentle tugs and entered the garden with him. The atmosphere was beyond anything she could have rightly imagined. The babble of running water. Koi surfacing to scoop up unaware bugs on the pond’s surface. Even the sound of leaves rustling in the gentle breeze seemed novel. 

It was overwhelming. 

Maybe that was why they were being ushered towards the teahouse by their chaperones. While Nox couldn’t have tea as the caffeine in it was not particularly good for her, it could offer a quiet refuge as she adapted to nature. Her hesitant steps barely crunched in the gravel, and she jumped at nearly every sound—from birds fluttering out of trees to the occasional snap of a twig. Beneath the human hesitation and fear, there was a part of her that knew that it was far closer to home than the scraps of fulfillment the HPSC gave her.

They just needed to get past the mental block.

As they approached the building, Nox was allowed to set the pace. While the two adults kept some distance to give them space and not provide an overbearing presence, letting the young teens explore their connection in their own way, Hawks kept his pace in stride with her. Known for his speed and insurmountable impatience, it was refreshing to observe the attunement he had with the girl who was supposed to be his field partner.

For Hawks, it was like witnessing the world for the first time again, but through her eyes. He could practically feel her absorbing everything around her: the wind rustling through the leaves, the gargling croak of a Grey Heron on the edge of Sweet Flag Island, and the earthy scent of the damp moss often covering the ground in Japanese Gardens. When a koi breached to catch an insect, she froze at the almost tranquil splash of water. 

Then, suddenly, a spark!

Nox’s fingers twitched in his grip as something primal stirred beneath all of her caution—something hers. Her eyes remained locked on the ripples as her pupils dilated rapidly, leaving only a thin blue ring visible. She didn’t bolt, she didn’t hide or seek comfort. She simply inhaled. Deeply, nostrils flaring as she simultaneously sucked in a large breath through her cheeks, forcing air against the special olfactory organ in her soft palate. Then, again—slow and deliberate, repeated until she was satisfied. As she continued moving air through her cheeks, her eyes began to drift close in a lazy slow-blink. It was almost as if she was experiencing freedom for the first time through scent alone.

There you are, Hawks thought as he grinned victoriously to himself. That was the leap in the direction he had hoped he’d see. It wouldn’t fix everything right away; of course, it wouldn’t. But it meant that his intuition was correct, yet again, when it came to all things Nox, much to what would surely be the chagrin of Ren and the HPSC as a whole. His hand twitched around hers, an unfamiliar tingle on his lips. 

“After you, young lady,” All Might’s voice boomed as he slid open the shoji door with an exaggerated bow.

Even without his theatrical tone, the bass tones of his voice seemed to echo through the tranquil garden and broke Hawks out of the spell. While he couldn’t place the weird fluttering and tingling he had begun to feel, it eased as his focus was pulled towards the men a couple of meters away. As he looked towards them, his gaze caught Yokumiru's, who, with a sharp tilt of his head, silently signaled it was time to head in. With an acknowledging nod, he turned his attention back to Nox and gently bumped his shoulder against hers, silently communicating, ‘Let’s go.’

As they stepped up to the teahouse’s entrance, Hawks’ hand had released hers and came to rest on Nox’s midback. In part, the intent was to guide her, but he was no longer sure if the constant contact was for her support or his own. His gaze flicked back and forth, taking stock of his surroundings. There was still so much nervous energy in her, despite how natural she seemed just moments ago.

Once they entered the teahouse, Nox seemed to relax a bit. While wooden structures were not familiar to her, the idea of being indoors was certainly a welcome normalcy. On its own, it was a small oasis of peace with shoji doors and tatami flooring, while the building itself was nestled behind walls of bamboo. Everything about it felt tranquil and blended effortlessly into the surrounding gardens, which was no surprise given that the facility was reservation-only and open to the public on specific dates. Even the older men seemed subdued as they sensed the shift in atmosphere.

It was the perfect setting to help her settle—if she allowed it.

In the center of the longer room intended for ryuurei visits [a tea ceremony that takes place in chairs instead of tatami] was a chabudai [a traditional, short-legged table] made of tsubaki [camelia tree], designed for just four people. It was easy enough to imagine that, under normal operating conditions on days it was open to the public, the room might support two rows of six tables. In the center of the table was a wide, lacquered shou suji ban [charcoalized wood] tray containing,wagashi [traditional Japanese sweets] treats in a variety of colours and types. Sakura mochi (pink red bean paste mochi wrapped in a pickled sakura leaf) was a seasonal staple, along with the hanami-coloured [pink, white, green]  round mochi with a flourish of twisted dough at the top worked into blossoms. The incredibly sweet nerikiri were shaped into beautiful gradient sakura blossoms and arranged on the tray to emulate the blossoms themselves. 

Almost too pretty to eat.

Nox hesitated before finding a location at the table that left her feeling the least vulnerable - closest to the guest entrance and the interior wall. Carefully, she settled onto the tatami mat in a seiza position. Her posture was stiff, as if she expected someone to scold her for something as simple as existing. Hawks was the first to move from the entrance; he knew the taboo she’d just committed, and was going to join her in solidarity and take his place next to her. While All Might smiled and shook his head, Yokumiru was less amused, stopping short before giving the Number One an exaggerated look of frustration.

“It’s her first time out in this big, wide world, my friend,” All Might murmured in a conspiratorially quiet volume. “If that’s where she feels safest, let her have it. 

Ideally, as Chaperones, All Might would have Hawks spot while Yokumiru would have Nox’s. The two teens were considered equals at present, though Nox certainly hadn’t been treated as such, so their placement would have been less specific, as long as they were side by side. But today was meant to be a break from the rules and regulations of her regimented life. Looking at Yokumiru knowingly, the giant of a man shrugged and gave his trademark grin before taking his seat across from Hawks. This position would typically be reserved for the head guest, and Yokumiru once again grumbled about the romanticization of insubordination, as if letting a traumatized teen sit where she felt safe was somehow a slippery slope.

The tea house’s quiet solemnity had a spiritual quality. Light, dappled from the bamboo and other surrounding foliage, filtered into the opened paper screens. The sounds of the pond, birdsong, and the occasional insect added to the overall tranquility of the setting. The room held a stillness that seemed to slow time itself, and even All Might and Mera, all too accustomed to high-stress life, found themselves relaxing. For a moment, it even looked like Nox was relaxing; her shoulders loosening and her brows finally unfurrowed.

If Hawks didn’t know any better, he’d say she was at ease. 

It wasn’t the rigidity of her spine that gave her away, but the way her eyes darted at sounds out in the garden. Shifting into an agura position, he subtly inched a little closer to allow his knee to touch hers. He knew beforehand that this would not be a formal event; All Might had requested a special accommodation, and while he didn’t know what that accommodation was, it impacted the viability of the standard, meditative moment, which is likely why they’d been placed in the ryuusei room. 

There was a moment when their knees touched just so. The contact was small—barely there—and created a moment where Hawks was allowed to believe she was okay. That she could escape the confines that had trapped her emotionally, mentally, and someday maybe even physically. All Might and Yokumiru were also attuned to the subtle signs of her body language. They had both noticed that brief moment of ease, with their gaze clearly fixed on her. It was a sign that she was beginning to relax, even if just for a few seconds. Whether it was the teahouse or being out in nature, the excursion had a revitalizing effect on her, even if brief. The room’s tranquil atmosphere was a perfect setting for her to begin to let her guard down. 

That moment was fleeting.

The staff door slid open with a low rattle as staff stepped into the room. The teamaster was carrying a steaming tray of chawan [a ceramic bowl specifically for matcha], a small iron kettle, and a lacquered box set to one side. Once she approached the table, Nox startled, her body going rigid as her eyes locked onto the stranger.

As the stemming matcha was served in silence to the chaperones, Hawks snuck glances at Nox out of the corner of his eye. She was wide-eyed and fixated, tense and unsure. For her, it probably brought up painful memories of how people tended to react to her appearance; a low external presentation like hers wasn’t common, and her more predatory appearance often unsettled people at first glance. He could feel the tension radiating off of her despite how calm she was pretending to be. He pressed his knee against hers just a little more firmly to offer whatever reassurances it might have been worth, and hoped she received the message: I’m here. We’re all here. We’re all relaxed. This is normal.

Blue eyes quickly darted to him before sweeping around the table at the relaxed expressions of her companion and guardians. Between Hawks’ grounding touch, All Might’s attunement and smiles, and Yokumiru’s ease despite his general dissatisfaction, she was the only one who showed any stress. Even the teamaster was calm and had no visceral reaction to her; she was silent and focused on her tasks, paying minimal attention to prestige or appearance.

Her eyes scanned around the table once again. As the realization finally took hold, her shoulders loosened, and her vision moved slowly. She watched as the match was then placed in front of Hawks, who exhaled slowly through his nose while his feathers settled. Then, watched, wide-eyed as her own cup of warm, translucent green liquid was placed in front of her. She startled again, but, in a bid to remember etiquette despite her awe, pressed her palms together and bowed her head respectfully in a silent thank you. 

A faint tug pulled at Hawks’ lips as he silently observed through his peripheral vision. Glancing across the table, he gave the Number One a knowing look, trying to communicate his triumph silently. Over the rim of his chawan, All Might caught his golden gaze and gave him an approving nod before sipping quietly.

Success.

All Might observed Nox through the corner of his eyes. Her shoulders slowly began to loosen and relax. This outing was going better than he and Hawks had hoped, and the credit went to that boy. Without his sharp eye, steady touch, and the trust they had between them, he had pulled her back from the ledge. It was a skill he could take pride in. The fact that he was able to achieve that with her in the first place, in ways no one else had before, was a testament to how attuned to her he was. They’d make a great couple, and someday, he hoped they would find their happiness; however, that looked for them.

Hawks witnessed her shift from his peripheral vision; a tightness he felt in his chest finally releasing and replaced by a relaxed warmth. Seeing her relax, if only by a fraction, felt monumental. The way she pressed her hands together in such an awkward yet earnest gesture of gratitude was almost enough to make him laugh and cry at the same time. Her first sniffs alone took restraint to keep his wings from fluffing.

He wouldn’t disturb the moment, though, nor would he draw attention to it. Leaning forward slightly as if inspecting his own matcha, his eyes sharply looked up through his lashes, locking with the cyan eyes across the table in a quiet moment of communication they both understood: they were witnessing something fragile begin to unfurl.

That moment was then broken, just like that.

A loud slurp filled the room as Yokumiru sipped his tea like it was cheap ramen broth. All Might nearly choked on his own drink, trying not to laugh, while Hawks shot him a sharp, betrayed glare. Nox’s peace had been disrupted once again, a rolling wave of tension moving up her spine, making her look like she was about to jump out of her skin. Any other day, it would have almost been comical and cartoonish to watch—but not today.

“What?” Yokumiru drawled. “We’re romanticizing insubordination; figure I might as well just enjoy it.”

Hawks exhaled through his nose while his coverts rose like hackles. He was holding on to his patience by a silk thread, feeling his efforts were thwarted at every turn. The image of flicking a loose feather straight into Yokumiru’s eyeball was almost too seductive—until Nox made a noise.

It started as just a small, nasally choke that almost sent Hawks over the edge and into choosing violence. Then, a quiet little exhale between taut lips that shook her shoulders once before her head dropped to look at her lap, as if she had just committed treason. While All Might froze, just picometers away from sipping his bitter matcha, his eyes snapped to look at her. Hawks’ head swiveled so fast, one might have worried about injury. Even Yokumiru blinked at the sound, momentarily forgetting his role as Captain Buzzkillington, Party Pooping Extraordinaire, and lowest on the Billboard-JP.

That silence endured for two agonizingly silent beats.

Hawks was the first to break, collapsing to the side and pressing his forehead into the tatami. His wings ruffled and shook behind him as he otherwise silently laughed. This was supposed to be a serious moment, dammit. But the bastard just had to slurp his tea like they’re in some cheap noodle bar, ruining the tranquil atmosphere they’d all worked so hard to build. 

All Might choked a wheeze into his matcha, the effort to retrain himself causing tears to prick in his eyes. He quickly set his tea down and reached for his napkin as he struggled not to sputter. Unable to hold it in any longer, he let out a booming bellow of laughter, slapping his knee with his massive hand so hard it caused the table to shake.

As the trio gave in around him, Yokumiru sighed his annoyance and slurped again, louder this time, because apparently, chaos was now legal.

“Mera, come on…” Hawks groaned against the tatami, slowly righting himself. “Are you seriously that petty?”

“Such refined flavors!” All Might declared, sensing the tension and ever the mediator, cleared his throat loudly before raising his matcha again with exaggerated elegance. “Slurping is actually traditional in some regions!”

“You’re embarrassing yourselves,” Nox interjected flatly, resulting in immediate silence. 

Her eyes were narrowed with pure feline disdain as she stared down Yokumiru for a beat. Hawks, still wiping tears from his eyes, straightened immediately when Nox’s disapproval landed like a judge’s gavel. Clearing his throat, he shot Mera a sharp, withering side-eye. 

The first to recover from the shock, Yokumiru’s eyebrows twitched with poorly concealed offense. Staring the young trainee down, without breaking eye contact, he took another large, obnoxious slurp of tea.

The ceasefire, as short-lived as it was, had been broken. 

Hawks’ face contorted into murderous intent as he stared Yokumiru down, barely restraining himself from sending him through the paper wall and into the koi pond. Across from him, All Might made a choked, exaggerated sound. 

But Nox just sighed. Long-suffering and world-weary, and almost completely forgotten in the general commotion of the men surrounding her. She lifted her own cup with exaggerated dignity, the minty steam tickling her nose. The warmth was grounding, and she let her eyes fall closed to just enjoy the moment to herself. Bringing it to her lips slowly, testing the heat, she took her first sip and slurped as loud as she possibly could; the sound echoing off the rafters.

Yokumiru conceded his loss. He set his chawan down with theatrical solemnity and raised both hands in surrender. 

“Ha!” Hawks exclaimed, jabbing his finger in Yokumiru’s direction, wings puffing up with pride. “What is this?” she murmured. 

“Well, I knew you couldn’t partake in the matcha, so I provided the tea master a special blend to relax feline heteromorphs when I scheduled this event,” All Might explained in a calm, matter-of-fact tone. “It’s catnip.”

Chapter Text

As the truth of the tea was unveiled, a heaviness settled in the air. Nox seemed blissfully ignorant and unaware of the catnip brew. What may have been alarming was shielded from her by the sheltered upbringing within the commission walls. All Might, however, was acutely aware of his blunder; shouting out the herb had drawn concern from both Yokumiru and Hawks. Coughing loudly into his fist, he turned away, becoming invested in his teacup.

Hawks’ eyes crinkled and gleamed with his poorly suppressed mischief. While he had heard some other feline heteromorphs talk openly and even trade springs of the mint, cultivating it in a way, Nox wasn’t part of that clique. Or any clique, really, thanks to the HPSC branding her as dangerous and volatile.

“Oh?” Hawks prompted in a low and conspiratorial tone, playing dumb primarily for the sake of watching her reaction. “You like it?”

Yokumiru squinted suspiciously at Nox. She had slurped but hadn’t consumed much of the beverage overall. His gaze then shifted in irritation towards All Might, who now seemed so fixated on his teacup that it might as well have held the secrets of the universe. His eyes narrowed at Hawks, who was leaning in towards Nox; weight on planted palms, wings unfurled, and dangerously close. He could’ve laid his head on her shoulder, and with the way his lips curled somewhat at one corner, and his eyes crinkled—dear god, the boy was openly flirting. It reminded Yokumiru of younger operatives giving their love interest their first drink. Lastly, his eyes snapped back to Nox, who now had an abnormally relaxed expression as she watched her tea swirl. 

A beat passed before comprehension finally dawned with the most exhausted sigh known to man.

“Toshinori,” Yokumiru muttered flatly, rubbing his temples. “Tell me you didn’t.”

All Might winced at his tone before slowly turning to meet Yokumiru’s critical gaze. Sheepishly, he rubbed the back of his neck and tried to give a comforting, dismissive smile.

“It’s-It’s not technically illegal,” the behemoth of a man protested weakly. “Besides, you know, it has plenty of medicinal applications, it’s just with cats it has different side effects—”

“Medicinal herbs don’t make people high,” Yokumiru groaned, burying his face in his hands. “It’s herbal narcotics. You drugged my trainee.”

“It’s a natural relaxant!” All Might offered weakly, but was unable to argue further under Yokumiru’s dead-eyed stare.

A loud rumble echoed through the tea room, bringing the bickering between All Might and Yokumiru to an end. Their heads turned to the pair across the table, staring in rapt interest. The air was silent while palpable tension radiated from all three men.

Nox had been known to purr. The fact that she was should not have been surprising, especially with the inclusion of catnip tea into their outing. Yet, Hawks’ eyes had gone wide, blinking only rarely as if he would miss something critical. His body was stiff, rigid—even his wings had stiffened enough for some of his feathers to begin to form a point.

He was so close to her already, but now, Nox had nuzzled gently against him. With a stuttered chuff, she rubbed her cheek against his while her loud purr echoed in his ear. His breath hitched with the contact, not quite expecting any open affection. Or the purring—definitely not the purring. The sensation of her skin against his as she leaned towards him, her body language warm and relaxed, was almost overwhelming. He swallowed the lump in his throat, words and sounds failing him in that moment as a deep flush graced his cheeks.

When the rough papillae on the tip of her tongue flicked against the skin of his cheek, his whole world tilted. His mouth became almost painfully dry. Every thought flew out the window, leaving only the echo of her purr. Even if his life were on the line, he wouldn’t have been able to speak or even process the world around him. His heart did a backflip in his chest before it began to pound so hard it almost drowned out the sweet, sweet sound of her purrs. 

Hawks let out a soft oomph as she slumped against him, head butting his shoulder before nuzzling against his neck. In that moment, with her warm face buried against his shoulder, he finally realized…

She was the most beautiful god damn thing he’d ever seen.

Hawks remained motionless, his wings stiff behind him. He was so tense in that moment that his feathers had gone rigid, one twitching wildly like a malfunctioning antenna. The look on his face screamed: I have supreme cosmic power and zero training for this. With his brain short-circuiting, all he could do was slowly turn his gaze to her, his golden eyes wide. He didn’t dare move; he didn’t dare disturb her. Not when she was purring. Not when she had just licked him.

His throat felt tight and dry. He felt a strong urge to warble back at Nox; to chirp and sing in a way that only they understood. But with a glance towards Yokumiru’s tired and annoyed expression, it felt unwise to try to reach her with that part of himself. Instead, he inhaled deeply through his nose and tried to release a sharp, stuttered breath; chuffing as she would to the best of his ability.

Yokumiru deflated in his agitation and sank back into his spot, muttering something under his breath about “biological warfare”. The handler just looked tired, as if he had aged ten years in that moment from sheer, bureaucratic horror. All Might, in contrast, was beyond delighted at this development and sipped his matcha with smug satisfaction. Mission Accomplished. This was what the day was about, in essence, whether Yokumiru appreciated that fact or not. Not only did he enjoy the naive romanticism of young love, knowing that Nox had someone, but it also provided him with much paternal relief. Hawks was a fine boy, from what he’d seen, and was willing to go the distance for someone who actively pushed others away. Giving the chance to actually nurture made him proud.

Hawks barely noticed either of them anymore. He was too fixated on her, staring down with wide, golden eyes. The flush that had graced his face had finally reached his ears, and he was frozen in place. He hadn’t received a response to his attempt to chuff, but his entire body remained locked up with rigid wings fluffed twice their usual size. The only sign he wasn’t actually catatonic was the way his fingers twitched against the tatami. He wanted to reach out—to touch her— but he was afraid. Not of Yokumiru, and what the commission might think, but of breaking that spell they were under.

Until she chuffed again.

That soft sound and warm breath were felt through the fabric of his dress shirt, sending shivers up his spine. His eyes fell closed as he felt an almost internal vertigo. The spiral and swimming feeling in his very being was nauseating. His throat tightened almost painfully until…

“Khhh!” Hawks choked on air, his voice cracking as he failed to sound unaffected. “G-good! Good that you, uh… You like it?”

He continued to hesitate a moment longer until something inside of him snapped, and he warbled quietly. Shamelessly and without the hesitation he previously felt, his arm wrapped around Nox’s shoulders. Wings that had been stiff and rigid draped around her, shielding her in a little pocket of their own. Nuzzling into her hair like an excited little chick, he cooed; a sound that was quiet but embarrassingly high. It didn’t matter, though; he short-circuited and his entire world narrowed down to the warm weight of Nox against him. It was a glimpse of her, as he knew her, and that sent him over the moon. While she had only had a small amount, he would enjoy as much of this moment as he could.

The two teens were tangled, curled up together for what felt like ages. Low rumbles of her purr and soft pips of his whisper-warbles echoed through the room, filling it with a sense of warmth. It felt like a magical moment; something pure, rare, and wonderful. For that brief period, Nox was a different person—a touch-starved cat looking for affection. While Hawks was a protective little bird, trying to shield her from the world. There was something undeniably precious in the way they almost instinctually sought each other out. Neither of them seemed aware of their audience.

It even reached Yokumiru, whose horrified resignation softened at the sight before him. While it was certainly troublesome, the wholesome moment of connection and happiness was unlike what he’d ever observed in the dorms. This was their true nature, and while it had to be suppressed for their success with the public, maybe looking the other way in their downtime was the right call.

All Might smiled as he observed. He had hoped they’d finally grow into something more than just friends. For all intents and purposes, when it came to Nox, he was a parent finally seeing their child reach a developmental milestone. Seeing them together, like this, made his chest swell with pride.

“I’m too old for this,” Yokumiru muttered, failing to mask the warmth he felt at the display of raw heteromorphic affection with the bitterness the organization had filled him with.

“Oh, stop it, you old grump,” All Might jabbed quietly. “We set out to make her feel better, and I’d say, we’ve achieved that. It just so happens that this is the form her sense of safety is taking.”

He nodded in the direction of the red-feathered cocoon. Behind the wings, Hawks was resting his head on her chin and quietly singing to her in a way that, despite the species barrier, seemed to be understood by both. All that mattered was this: Nox was happy. Nox was relaxed. Nox was safe—and for once, she seemed to believe it.

“I-” Yokumiru started, ready to separate the two. But, seeing his ward practically vibrating with pure joy and overenthusiastic teenaged affection sounding somewhere between a delighted pigeon and a malfunctioning tea kettle—well, that was hard to fight against. “This is the worst day of my professional life.”

“Oh, I doubt that very much.” All Might muttered, taking another sip from his tea and earning a sharp glare in retaliation. “I’m serious. What we’re witnessing is the very future unfolding. Whatever fears Ren has about her, I’m confident that as long as Hawks is there, she’ll stay on the right path.”

Yokumiru deflated with a heavy sigh, unable to argue with the logic. Those two have been impossible to separate since that day Hawks broke the rules and interacted with her in the med bay. The effect they had on each other could not be ignored. She made Hawks fierce, calculating, and focused. He made her soft, grounded, and present. 

“Yeah,” the handler mumbled. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

“Let them figure this out, Mera,” All Might reasoned over some strawberry mochi. “You have to let her try; let her prove nurture over nature, and let him be the reason behind it. And maybe that means you’re uncomfortable, letting them have whatever nuance goes into mutant quirk dynamics that we could never understand. I know you’re worried about perception, so just let them have it behind closed doors. Work with their nature, not against it.”

The adult sat in companionable silence for a while, watching as the teens enjoyed their own little world. Hawks cooed happily and fixed tangles in Nox’s hair as she relaxed. It was peaceful—even Yokumiru would have to admit that. He wasn’t looking forward to explaining the licking in his weekly report, but it was hard to ignore that whatever tension that lingered had gone, replaced with something unbearably soft. Something settled into his chest, telling him that they would be fine—better than fine.

“I hate you sometimes,” Yokumiru grumbled. “You know they’re going to be insufferable, right?”

“Of course they will; they’re kids, Mera. That’s what kids do,” All Might nodded through another mochi. “But they’re in love, whether they realize it or not, so we might as well just let the pieces fall as they will.”

“Fine, but if I catch him preening her in public—”

“Oh, you absolutely will!” All Might snorted through his last gulp of tea. 

Yokumiru groaned and slumped forward, letting his forehead hit the wood with a dull thunk. A sound that disrupted the peace of the room. The purring stopped. Nox’s eyes opened slowly as her nictitating membrane retreated. Her body stiffened as she seemed to hear something, head on a swivel, trying to listen for the source. She pulled away from Hawks, her eyes darting around the room. When the shoji door opened, she nearly jumped out of her skin, clearly expecting an ambush—of what, no one knew for sure, but Hawks and Yokumiru exchanged a glance that communicated they were thinking the same thing.

Ren.

Reading the moment, All Might subtly shifted his weight enough to make the tatami creak. It was just enough of a distraction for Nox’s head to spin on a swivel. Taking a piece of mochi between his chopsticks, he leaned forward and offered it to her with the most disarming smile he could muster. While her focus was pulled, Hawks’ wings flared to block her view of the door and provide a sense of security so the incoming staff member—who was just bringing more tea—didn’t send her into an unnecessary panic. The silence lasted for a few beats before Nox released a shaky exhale, shoulders slumping as the teamaster came with another tray.

The teamaster’s gaze swept across the table as she cleared away empty matcha sets and replaced them with warm, green teas. When she noticed that the herbal tea provided had barely been touched, she settled on Nox’s wide, startled eyes. Stoic, she bowed her head in a respectful greeting, easing the tension just a fraction.

“My apologies,” she murmured in a soft, almost monotone voice. “I did not mean to startle you. I am here to collect the used chawan and provide everyone with yunomi for sencha.”

“See? No ambushes,” Hawk teased, accepting the mochi All Might had offered and nudging it towards her. Then, with a playfully sharp side-eye at the older hero, he dropped his voice into an exaggerated, conspiratorial whisper: “Unless you count All Might stealing all the strawberry ones.”

“Hey,” All Might protested, hand clasped to his chest like he had just been betrayed. “I’ve only had three.”

“They’re the best flavor!” Hawks clipped, with his wings partially flared. 

“Indeed, I see no ambushes,” the teamaster confirmed politely, her lips quirked in a suppressed smile as she gathered the last of the used drinkware. “And, I have unfortunately borne witness to many examples of All Might’s insatiable sweet tooth.”

“Tu es, brute?” All Might whinged, biting his lip in an exaggerated pout.

“It’s et tu, brute,” Yokumiru corrected in a grumble. “At this rate, we are never going to be allowed back here.”

The teamaster wisely decided that this was her cue to exit, and silence fell over the table again.

Nox huffed, but she eased just a little. It filled Hawks with a sense of relief. This was everything he had always hoped for her; that someday, she would know what it was like to wake up each morning in a room with windows that didn’t face a tiny, internal courtyard surrounded by large concrete walls. Where sunlight actually shines through, and birds chirp and sing in the distance. To hear the wind blowing and experience the world as it truly was, on her own terms. 

Even if Nox didn’t fully trust the absence of danger right now, he hoped that continuing as usual would be helpful. He wanted to show her that this was normal, that she was normal. Whatever they’d shared just moments ago—that was normal—even if the HPSC said otherwise.

When she looked at him, in a lingering moment of eye contact, she seemed almost remorseful. He met her with a soft, understanding smile. Her sapphire eyes searched his for a few long beats before she finally smiled back. Whatever lingering shaming might have been there for whatever that moment was, it didn’t matter. 

Nox was Nox, and that’s all he needed to know. 

All Might watched for a moment as Hawks continued to nudge mochi and other sweets towards Nox as the tension slowly bled out of her. It was undoubtedly a good start for what both he and the teen boy had hoped for her today. It wasn’t quite everything they had hoped to get out of it, but the day was still young, having arrived bright and early. Overall, it was a small step forward in overcoming a lifetime of ingrained fears and traumas that he had unwittingly placed her in the path of. That sort of thing would not go away overnight, but every moment like this mattered. Every chance she had to enjoy moments that would be considered developmentally normal for her age, and every smile they coaxed from her counted.

“You know,” All Might started quietly, glancing at the pair with a knowing smile. “You’re a good fit for each other.”

“What do you mean?” Nox asked, seemingly even less aware than Hawks.

Hawks, having just realized something that could change everything between them, visibly deflated at her question. All Might’s brows pinched as he shared a glance with the boy, hoping to communicate something to him with just his gaze alone. For a few moments, he had watched as their world had been a normal place. Simple things between them, like preening and cuddling, seemed like a truly blissful treat, and they’d been able to treat each other like normal teenagers.

“Oh, I only meant you two seem to complement each other well,” All Might answered, downplaying his initial intent. “In this life, it’s not often that you find someone who truly understands you—not like the way you two seem to. I just think that’s something worth exploring. So, how about we finish our tea, and once you’re feeling okay, let’s get back to the park. There’s so much more to this place than this room, and I think it’ll help strengthen your connection.”

Hawks exhaled through his nose, visibly relaxing. While his wings puffed out just a little, his smile tightened as he gave a slight, nearly imperceptible nod. He was grateful that the older hero had picked up on his silent plea and deflected it so smoothly. The message was received. Nox was still just a little too guarded to accept things at their full value.

“Yeah,” he agreed, putting a hand on Nox’s shoulder. “How about you finish your tea? I think it’ll help you enjoy being out there more; maybe we can even feed the koi.”

Nox lifted her yunomi to her lips, sniffing at it briefly. The predictable sharp inhale and flehmen response followed, before she brought the ceramic to her lips and gulped it down, not bothering to pace herself. Maybe she was sensing the tension, or perhaps she was hoping it would have the same relaxing effect.

The moment her cup was set back down, her nose began to wrinkle. It only took a moment before her nose twitched, and she quickly tucked her face into her elbow,  trying her best to keep the sneeze discreet. After several moments’ pause, her gaze was trained towards the cup. Her pupils were blown, looking like new moons against a brilliant blue dusk sky as she stared at the ceramic as if it had personally betrayed her. 

“Nox…?” Hawks prodded in concern, deeply invested in her reactions.

“That may have been a mistake,” Yokumiru murmured under his breath.

Hawks watched in dawning horror, his wings unfurling. One tiny slurp turned her into an affectionate mess—a moment he wished he could’ve lasted longer. But she had just swapped the whole yunomi. The problem was that she didn’t know what might trigger her more feline nature. 

Now, Nox’s fingers flexed, like she was contemplating murder, with her gaze moving from the empty tea vessel to the wagashi tray. While her outward presentation was low, internally, she was a bit more feline. Her teeth were sharp—capable of real damage.

It was hard not to immediately wrap his arms around her to try to soothe whatever she was feeling. Every ounce of willpower he had was spent trying to contain that urge and let her ride this out on her own. Before he even realized it, his wings were fully extended, as if trying to put himself between Nox and a threat. His wings fluffed and, before he knew it, his hands were cupping her face. With gentle pressure, he redirected her gaze to him, hoping beyond reason that the effect would wear off quickly. Right now, all he could do was keep her turned towards him until the effect wore off, or at least help her through whatever was going to happen. Hopefully, it wasn’t something violent or rash. 

Even in this state, he found her stunning. Deadly, but breathtaking. The raw power and low rumble she exuded—held in his very hands—gave him a sense of awe. As odd as it was, the notion that she might just go feral and bite someone only intensified the magnetism he felt. 

Then—a chirp!

The teahouse felt quiet as the sweet, soft chime came from the open patio. In a flutter of wings, a small, brown bird with a rich chestnut cap landed on the veranda. The tea room opened to the garden, leaving the poor creature exposed—not that the shoji screen doors would provide much protection. The small sparrow hopped and sang at its landing point, only to go silent and cock its head as soon as it noticed the quartet. Nox froze, her muscles wound tight.

Prey or plaything?

Hawks breathed a small sigh of relief and casually flicked a single red feather past her face to disrupt her fixation on the fragile little bird. Her head snapped, tracking the feather as it floated and twirled through the air. With a slight chuckle, he leaned against the table, resting his head on his hand as he watched her take swipes at the red keratin.

“You wanna chase the poor thing, don’t you?” he whispered to himself, knowing that All Might and Yokumiru might actually combust if she did. “Sorry, kitten, I can’t let you hunt an actual bird, but my feather is fair game.”

The exchange was observed with focused attention. The moment the little chirp had sounded on the patio, both adults knew what was going to happen. But rather than the immediate lunge of the hunt Nox had been trained for, they witnessed something even more rare: a moment of play. 

The rapt interest on Nox’s face as Hawks toyed with her, feather flitting and guiding her attention away from the bird outside like a flirt stick, warranted a collective sigh of relief. While the bird quickly chirruped and took off, vanishing from the immediate field of view, that red feather kept hovering just within her reach. He’d wait for her to take the bait and try to swipe at it before pulling it away at the last moment.

After teasing and flirting with the feather, there was a moment of frozen tension. When Hawks was starting to think the moment had passed, Nox managed to snag his feather like she’d been waiting her whole life to make that very move. She had snatched it out of the air before falling back onto the tatami. Her fingers traced the keratin as she gazed at the feather with interest. For a moment, he was almost worried she’d bite it and shred it like a housecat, but instead, her gaze just flicked to him, with a wide-eyed expression that bordered on a plea for the feather to continue.

“Mission accomplished,” Hawks whispered under his breath, offering his girl a soft smile before wriggling the feather out of her grip and resuming its twirls in the air.

His girl.
He loved the way that sounded.