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If I have to sit through one more of these meetings, I think I was just going to strangle myself. It had been a month since Cardan had turned into a serpent, and the Living Council had every gripe underneath the moon about it. Nihuar constantly talked about the Seelie and unseelie Court allegiances; Randalin discussing how to keep the peace; and Baphen pledging how he hadn’t seen any new signs within the stars. Cardan wasn’t there, and instead had a visitation from one of the former courts he needed to attend.
What a bore, I thought, it would be a blessing to listen to him argue with these fools.
I leaned into my hand, sighing quietly as my lower abdomen started to ache dully. I tried to think if I had eaten anything today, and blamed the pain on my pathetic eating habits. I stood up abruptly, the chair scooting back and screeching softly. All of the Council’s eyes went to me, and I dismissed them quietly.
“Your Majesty–” Lord Randalin starts, but I shake my head. “We will continue this tomorrow, we have spoken long enough,” and with that I headed out and towards the kitchen.
There was supposed to be a revel tonight, meaning the kitchen was fully prepared with banquets and courses ready to serve. I stepped inside and the Fae parted unknowingly before continuing with their service. I picked up a small handful of berries and cheese from the large storage room itself and left without a notice.
As I made my way back to my bedroom chambers, I frowned when Cardan wasn't there. Some part of me hoped that his duties would be quick and he would return. I missed his arrogant smirk, whether I would admit that to his face however, chances were slim. I ate what I had picked out and tidied the bedroom. It was apparent me and Cardan were not restful sleepers, not with every blanket we had being strewn across the bed and the floor.
After cleaning, I decided to focus on my dull blades for the evening, sharpening them with rough stone as I waited for the height of midnight to come.
.·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·.
A few hours had passed. Cardan had not returned. And my abdomen still ached. The moon was nearing its high, and I decided to start getting ready for the revel. I went to the washroom to relieve myself. Unfortunately, I was anything but relieved. I started my period. I have dealt with periods all my life, yes, but they have never been this inconvenient. Especially with Cardan sticking around.
I sighed heavily and looked underneath the sink, grabbing the small bag of tampons I had bought while with Vivi in the mortal realm. I cannot even remember the last time I had a period, I’m sure it changed after the stressful events of the last few months. Once I situated myself, I called Tatterfell in and allowed her to get me ready.
She did my hair in my signature style–up in elegant horns fashioned with jewelry and chains. I was dressed in a beautiful, dark blue silk dress, the skirt barely touching the floor. The fabric was intricately patterned with white and black moths, reaching from my top left shoulder to down near my feet. I put on a light brown corset around my waist, fitting matching arm cuffs around my wrists before strapping my knives into place. You can never be too careful in Faerie.
I leave Tatterfell behind as I exit the room, walking down the long corridors and towards the throne room. While walking, I was suddenly hit with a sharp pain in my abdomen. I bit the inside of my cheek and tried not to show how much it hurt, especially not in front of all of these guards and servants. I stop and lean against the wall for a few moments to stop the light dizzying effect that came with the pain before pressing on.
I stepped into the throne room, where the revel was starting to go into full swing, faeries dancing and drinking and singing all at once. They paused for a moment at my entrance, wondering whether their Queen was going to mention a few words. I didn’t. And they continued. My eyes go to the dais, and low and behold, the High King greets me with a warming smile. I return one of my own, and as I walk over, he gives a small bow to me. Whether he's mocking me or being respectful, I wasn’t too sure.
“My Queen,” he stands up fully and gestures towards the revelers. “We have been waiting for your presence.”
I rolled my eyes and wrapped my arm around his, intertwining the two as we stood together. “If I’m not mistaken, it was you who had business to attend to. If anything it was I who had been waiting for you.”
He leaned down and pressed a kiss against my jaw. It was light and airy, sweet and loving. I didn’t want to admit that I craved more. Public displays of affection were not my thing, but Cardan never had any shame.
“My sweet nemesis, I am sorry to have kept you waiting. Business as usual took longer than expected, you know how the courtiers can talk for hours.”
I thought back to the Living Council meeting earlier and couldn't agree more.
“I’m sure your slick tongue did not help either.” His only response was a clever smirk as he snaked an arm around my back. I relaxed, and with the comfortableness of the night, I smiled. “I missed you, today.” It was not something I said often, I had only just opened my heart to him a month prior after all.
“I missed you today too, Jude.” As he finished his sentence, another bout of pain came over me. I curved inward slightly, holding my breath trying to let it pass. Cardan raised an eyebrow at me, but I shook off his gaze. I was used to this sort of pain, Hell–I have endured worse torture than it before. But the mix of dizziness, the uncomfortable feeling of blood, and the uncontrollable cramps? I don’t think I was going to last long during this night.
I tried giving Cardan a reassuring smile, however I was sure he saw through my facade as I pulled away. Before he could speak to me, a new leader of a former Lower Court stepped in, and quickly swept him into a new conversation. I was sort of relieved that I did not have to explain my ailment to him. Mortal women were known to have periods, but I am unaware of their extent of knowledge.
As the night dragged on, I found myself missing Cardan more and more, a longing that gnawed in the pit of my stomach.
Was love really this powerful of an influence? Maybe I should have killed Cardan when I had the chance. Having affection for him is terrible.
I felt my skin get a bit warmer, the pangs in my lower abdomen getting more forceful until my head felt like I had too much faerie wine to drink. The air was hotter than usual–and It wasn’t until I felt warm hands around my back that I realized my face was close to nearing the floor. I opened my eyes without realizing I had closed them. My head was swimming as I tried to evenly breathe. I then realized I was being held as I tried getting onto my feet.
“Easy,” he murmured. I couldn’t mistake that voice for anyone else of course–but how did he get here so quick? “What–where?” Sensations were lost on me as the hands on my back started leading me away. Cardan said something overtop the voices that were having fun, though it sounded muffled compared to the ringing in my ears.
As I slowly became more stable, I realized he was walking me through the halls. And then shame burned into my skin. How many people had seen me nearly pass out? How weak did I appear to them? I must have tensed up because Cardan’s furred tail gently swept up against my side. “I covered most of your body. Unless they were clever, no one suspected much other than the idea that I was ready to sweep you away for the night.”
His affection for me still unnerved me to this day, but the nervousness went to an emotion closer to. . . fonding. I was able to get a better hold of my balance, though my heartbeat was still loud in my head. We walked through our bedroom chamber doors, and Cardan sat me down on our bed with a frown. “Why didn't you tell me that you had fallen ill?”
“Ill?” I echoed, then realized he must have not known what was truly the cause of my problem. “Cardan, I am not ill.”
“I know your mortal tongue has many talents, but you cannot lie to me so easily in my face.”
“No, Cardan–” I looked down and sighed, my cheeks turning red. I was sure he was aware about mortal periods, but did explaining it really have to be so hard?
“You're slightly feverish, your cheeks are red, and you almost fainted in front of the entire court. Yet it is not an illness that plagues you?” He asked.
I took a deep breath. “No, I am simply. . .” How hard could words be? “. . .on my period. I started today.” I did not feel like looking him in the eye. I was well aware that we were past the days of bullying one another–however teasing was still on the table. When it was quiet for a few moments, I begrudgingly looked up. He simply blinked back at me.
“Why did you not tell me sooner?” He asked, and it was not the response I was expecting. “Jude, darling, I am fully aware that you are capable of taking care of yourself, but if you needed the night to focus better on. . . your situation, then you could have just gone.”
I gave him a look. “It would be a weakness to be away from the court, or at least not make an appearance. You know how the Fae are when it comes to spreading rumors.”
“My sweet Jude–always thinking, always perceiving herself in the eyes of others. Is there. . . anything I can do to help? I am not well versed in “periods”.”
I shook my head, and then took a sudden gasp of air as another sharp pain hit my abdomen. I bit my lip hard, the mattress beside me sinking with weight. Cardan pulled me into his arms, and setting my pride aside, I tucked my head underneath his chin and curled up. He placed more of those light kisses on my head, and they distracted me from the pain.
Eventually the pain subsided, turning into an unsettling ache. I would have stayed like that all night if it were not for the elegant clothing I was wearing. Cardan noticed this as well and gently kissed my forehead, using his ring finger to push back a loose strand of hair. “Get undressed, we will relax for the night.”
I opened my mouth to protest, but he placed a finger over my lips, a movement that made me blush. I would have put up more of a fight, but the pain and exhaustion made me cave. I stood up and got undressed, putting away the dress so it would not get wrinkled as I slid on a nightgown. I went to the washroom to replace my tampon, having a heavy flow made things much more difficult. I stood up to take my hair down, setting the jewelry on the wooden counter before Cardan came up behind me. He walked in just as I finished taking down my horns–and he picked up the brush I was reaching for. I looked at him within the mirror as he started brushing my hair. I stood there, feeling oddly comforted as the soft bristles raked through my somewhat tangled hair.
Cardan did not say a word. I did the same. He brushed it until it was completely smooth, down past my shoulders and slightly shining. He placed a kiss to the back of my head before leading me to the bed, holding my hand. He had changed into simpler clothes–clothes that made him look very un-High King-like. He was wearing a t-shirt I had gotten from the mortal world–as well as black sweatpants that hung loosely against his frame. He could almost pass for a teenager if it weren’t for his pointy ears and sharp cheekbones.
He was about to lay down on the bed before I stopped him. He looked back at me in slight concern, tail twitching back and forth. I did not reply, only left for the washroom once more only to come back with a damp cloth. He was sitting on the bed, staring out at the window before turning his gaze back to me.
I walked over to him and gently held his chin. Seeing him up so close made my heart flutter, the kind of beauty that makes you pause and think. I started to clean up his face, moving the cloth in gentle circles. “You forgot to take off your makeup again.” I said, trying to act as if I did not care.
A lazy smile started to spread on his lips. “I see no point in taking it off, it is a part of my complexion if anything.”
I rolled my eyes and wiped down his face until it was fully clean. I discarded the cloth into a woven laundry bin before joining him in bed. As I settled down, the pain refused to. I winced as it became relentless, and of course Cardan noticed. He always did. He sat up, leaning against the pillows and headboard as he pulled me up into his arms.
I laid on top of him, laying my head on his chest and listening to the sound of his dull heartbeat. Our legs were entwined, one of his hands holding my waist as the other rested on my back, etching circles and lines in a gentle motion.
I never would have imagined such a peaceful moment in Faerie. I felt like I was floating. Cardan’s warm body helped dull the consistent ache in my abdomen, and my head went to a serene place in the back of my mind, one that only focused on the bliss I was feeling. Did Vivi give me any mortal pills? I feel as though I might have taken them.
Just as I thought I was in complete bliss–Cardan started humming. It was a soft thing, a gentle tune or melody he must have remembered from long ago. It caused his chest to vibrate, and somehow caused me to relax even further. I closed my eyes, unable to will away the sleep that took me by force.
.·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·.
I was awoken to a light prodding of my shoulder. Sunlight filtered through the window, causing me to groan softly. God I hated that window so much. It was already hard adjusting to the awkward schedule of Faerie, did it really need to glare at me?
As I started to complain, I remembered what caused me to stir. I looked up at the hand that was shaking me, and I saw him. Cardan, no sign of sleepiness anywhere to be found on his facial features, was standing beside the bed. “I’m sorry to wake you up, Love,” He mumbled quietly. “But I fetched some tea for you, can you sit up and drink it? Afterwards, we can continue to rest.”
I tried racking my brain to wonder why on Earth I would need tea. I sat up without pushback, reaching out for the cup of tea. The faster I did what he wanted, the faster I could get back to sleep. My hands wrapped around the warm cup, and I almost melted from the heat. It soothed my body, and as I drank it slowly, it tasted of mint.
“Pain medication,” Cardan whispered. He crawled back into bed behind me, wrapping his arms around my stomach and placing his head on my shoulder. He was always so touchy. I continued to drink as I realize the room was much darker now. Cardan must have closed the curtains before he sat down.
His nails started to gently trace the shape of my body, a motion that made me rest back into him. I was usually not one for touch, or affection, but I did not mind it in the slightest right now. I set my cup down on the table beside the bed and sunk into Cardan’s arms. I felt his smile against my neck and asked him what delighted him at such an hour. I was ready for sleep.
“You, my sweet Jude. You delight me.”
I closed my eyes as he kissed the side of my face and laid down. His arms were still around me, his tail curling lightly around my ankle and swishing softly. I started to float back into the bliss I remembered I was in earlier–how long had it been since I had relaxed like this? Maybe it was the tiredness, maybe it was the pain. Or maybe it was just the closeness of it all–but I too, smiled. “I love you,” I told him.
I felt his hands tighten around my stomach just a little bit as he tucked me closer. “I love you too, Jude.”
Then the night took me away, neither dream or nightmare overtook me. Just Cardan holding me, and the peaceful silence overhung.