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The sky grew a shade darker with each second that passed. Ashen clouds unravelled under the weight of liquid agony, birthing millions of raindrops - each one fated to free fall. They pelted down on two girls in a ferocious show of unjustified resentment.
It was innate in the rain to want an empty meadow. However, neither girl spared a thought for the raging sky. It was innate in Mayu to bask in nature's waterworks without an umbrella. It was innate in Kaede to simply stay with the older girl.
"Kotone's returning from the city in two hours," Mayu heaved a sigh of something between longing and frustration. "The last time we talked, she told me...she likes me back. Kae, I don't know what to do."
A particularly large raindrop landed on Mayu's face, sliding down her nose before burying itself in the grass. The thought of capturing that moment slipped into Kaede's mind a split second too late. Her polaroid camera lay next to her, silvery metal glistening beneath rainwater.
Who am I to blame Kotone?
"I suppose...you can count the stars with her," Kaede offered, willing herself not to shiver as a chilling gale blew. Her eyes darted to the burgeoning darkness in the sky. She imagined the storm clouds gone by the time night fell, replaced by a canvas of stars. Mayu and Kotone would then sit beneath the full moon's glow-
No.
Something cracked nearby. For a moment or so, Kaede heard the sound coming from someplace within her.
Just a tree branch. That's it.
Kaede did not like her own thoughts.
"But you said the stars shine the brightest when we count them together," Mayu drawled. "I have a thing for Tone, but some things are just for us to keep," her voice floated like a windblown feather out into the open air.
Mayu spoke of memories ever so effortlessly. It was almost as if they meant nothing to her. However, Kaede needed the memories in her hands. She wanted to take them to the meadow, the hills and the cottages. Then, and only then, would she be able to speak of the countryside as her world.
You remember everything. Why, Mayu?
Why?
"What exactly do you feel for her? Like, is Kotone your favourite person?" a grimace crept onto Kaede's face as she uttered the last two words. Thunder taunted with a growl. It boomed through the sky before Mayu could reply.
"Kae, I admit that I'm lying to myself. I make it all up in my head and get high on the feelings I create. None of this Kotone stuff was ever real, but...I really hate being bored," an embarrassed chuckle escaped Mayu. She leaned into Kaede's frame without hesitation, temporarily shedding the burden of self-pity. It was but a natural consequence of uprooting herself from deception.
Mayu deserved to feel the suffocating ache of post-denial reality. Despite that, Kaede could not stop her heart from believing otherwise. The younger girl knew how the emptiest of things could also be heavy.
At that moment in time, Koma Mayu and Yamada Kaede were just two parallels. They sat in the grassy meadow. They got drenched in the evening downpour. They were torn between feelings and returning to their quaint cottages. More than anything, they mirrored each other's void hearts.
"Honestly, it's the same for me." Kaede was now aware of Mayu's warmth spreading through her shoulder. She glanced at the older girl, whose eyes were shut so as to filter out the world. Perhaps, Mayu wished to forget more than just the rain. Kaede could relate.
"You mean...Shion?" Mayu's eyelids lazily fluttered open. "Do you find life boring without her?"
"Not anymore," Kaede smiled wistfully. She could only say so much for now. After all, she was still moving on from Shion - and most definitely not moving on to someone new.
Kaede was not ready, and neither was Mayu. Both girls were not ready to leave the rain.
"Lying to yourself, I see. Kae, you're no better than me," Mayu gently patted the younger girl's back. "I know you still want to taste the bread she bakes. I know she still appears in your dreams-"
You know me so well, Mayu. You know everything about me.
All except for one thing.
Kaede's vision shifted down to the grass. "Right. I miss her...and I hate it."
To this day, I'm not sure if that one thing truly exists outside of my mind.
A flash of lightning streaked through the sky, creating a chasm in the clouds. It was blue, blinding and beautiful - a reflection of something Kaede and Mayu both failed to recognise.
"You're not alone. I hate it too."
You can't just say that. It's not like you know about that one thing.
Thunder rumbled in anguish, mourning the short-lived flash of electricity. Kaede silently stared at Mayu, observing how the raindrops could pass off as tears sliding down her face. The older girl shivered ever so subtly in her lavender prairie dress. It was completely soaked through - just like Kaede's sunshine yellow version of the same garment.
"You're cold, Mayu. We have to go home."
"Fine...but only because I listen to my best friend," Mayu tried to resist the grin tugging at her lips.
Best friend, huh?
Well, it's not like I'm ever telling you.
Kaede waited, only lifting herself from the wet grass after Mayu stood up.
"Race you to your cottage!" Mayu let out an unexpected yelp before taking to her heels. She dashed swiftly despite the relentless downpour, defying the howling wind with effortless grace.
Kaede watched the gale sweep Mayu's hair into cascading waves. She watched the older girl's figure shrink into the distance, wind still causing her dress to billow. Mayu whipped her head around, meeting eyes with Kaede for a second. It lasted an hour in the younger girl's dreams.
Would I throw myself into Shion's arms if she were to love me again?
The question is, would I choose you, Mayu?
Some questions were fated to be left unanswered. Kaede's feet remained firmly rooted in the grass. She could not ask - but she could at least watch. The sky was taking its time to clear up, and Kaede was just going to watch. The polaroid camera relished in the rain, unable to hear her thoughts.
Would I still choose you if I wasn't so bored?