Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Dude, are you like- good?”

Susie asked the question after catching Kris— who had just seemed to sluggishly trip over themself. 

The two had left Kris’s house a few minutes ago, maybe to walk around, maybe to go to the diner down the street and slam a fudge sunday- whatever Susie felt like doing, Kris had planned to follow. Though, unadmittedly, they weren’t having their best day beforehand. 

It had felt like Kris couldn’t remember the last time they were free from their soul; besides caging it away in the deep nights. They thought— prayed to be free from the ugly droning sound in the back of their head that followed the pulse of that soul. They wanted to break from the restraint of its captive will. They wanted, just for one day at least, to not worry about what they might do if this higher being decided to have its way. So they decided to cage it for longer. As long as they could. They were tired of the responsibility. This, although, wasn’t very beneficial to them in the long run. Unfortunately, Kris couldn’t act at top performance for long without it. 

After a terribly hidden exhausted breath, Kris weakly hummed with a nod, trying to gain composure, though still bent and holding onto Susie’s upper arm for support. 

“Listen, I don’t want to tell you how to feel or anything, but, Kris, you kinda look like shit right now.” She said. There was a pause as Kris continued to breathe with effort. “You know, it’s alright if you’re sick, dude. I’m free tomorrow too if you need some time to rest.” Susie awkwardly scratched the back of her head. 

“No…” Kris uttered lowly, tightening their hold on her arm. Their thinner hands barely hurt against Susie’s muscle. She couldn’t decipher if Kris was suddenly angry or not; their tone always seemed to change like that, with or without meaning. Kris then shuttered. “I can’t- I can’t,” they quavered, trying to hold on tighter, “I don’t want to.” They spat out, thinking about that sheer agonizing lack of control. After a beat of silence, their breath shook. Kris’s grip loosened, defeated, and they slowly dropped to their knees. Their hand slid down Susie’s arm with the steadied fall, but held on scarcely at the tips of her fingers. 

Susie froze, shocked by the sudden showcase of vulnerability. She couldn’t fathom someone, especially Kris, clinging onto her like that; suddenly delicate. She stared down at them wide-eyed, with only the sound of a dull breeze shifting fallen leaves across the road. “what’s- what’s wrong?” Susie then said, taking a knee to their level. She tried not to pay mind to how frail Kris’s hand felt.

“I’m not-…I’m sorry…” they stumbled over their few lightly-spoken words. Susie’s lips pursed in an empathetic expression. She gave Kris time to gather themself. With their hand that wasn’t holding onto Susie’s, they felt the jagged concrete sidewalk beneath them. “…I’m not sick.” They said, “I don’t…want to be at my house. Right- today.” Their voice cracked under pressure. They wanted to be as far away from that cage as they could. Susie’s expression shifted, unsure of how to help. 

“Do you… need to go to my place?” She offered, though unsure if that would be a better option from what she was assuming the issue to be. After a second, Kris nodded. “Well, my place isn't very…” she trailed off in slight thought, then sighed with a hint of worry. “Okay, yeah we can go there.” She decided, giving Kris a faint worried smile. She then stood up, holding out her hand for Kris to get a better hold of. After pulling them up, she realized just how light they were.

———

Kris had never seen the apartment Susie lived in, until then. Kris couldn’t care less about how clean or dirty it was, but some things- the bills scattered across the island, a few lone bottles near the TV, the lack of decor (if any), etc- well it made sense as to why Susie was so hesitant for them to see the place over their time knowing each other. 

“Sorry, my place isn’t really… tidy to say the least.” She laughed with an awkward tone behind it. She began towards her room with Kris following behind. “Kinda glad my mom isn’t home right now, I mean, she wouldn’t care that you’re here, but…” she said, stepping over a small pile of clothes in the hallway. She didn’t really have any specific ending for that statement. She opened the door to her room, fidgeting with her jacket in her other hand. “Here it is,” She presented half-heartedly. 

The reveal was anticlimactic to say the least. There was a bed, a nightstand next to the bed, and a closet. Other than that, a slightly-torn poster of a big monster stepping on a city was stuck to the wall with peeling tape, and some dirty clothes sat on the floor. Although, Kris couldn’t care less about the looks.

“I know it’s not really- cool and stuff. Nothing like what Ralsei set up for us in the dark world.” She sighed. “I mean the bed is comfortable.” She added. “You can, like, sit on it or whatever.” Susie fidgeted. Kris, all around exhausted, didn’t hesitate to take off their shoes and make their way. They situated themself on the bed and leaned back against the wall. Susie then sat next to them. 

Kris let out another sigh, but it seemed to have some relief in it. Susie craned her head up at the textured ceiling. “…do you wanna talk about it? Or, do you need anything?” Susie asked, running through the list of things she’d heard Ralsei ask whenever Kris or her seemed upset. Though, Kris didn’t reply. Which maybe meant no? It was hard to tell sometimes. Susie felt terrible at these ‘friendship’ things. 

“I’m not sure.” They answered at last. Kris felt so tired, but their worries were too prominent for any rest. They knew they couldn’t tell Susie about the whole soul ordeal, but they’d explode if they kept their mouth shut for much longer.

“Do you want time to think about it?” Susie proposed, with her voice softer than normal. Kris nodded again.

While a little time passed, Susie shifted closer to Kris; maybe as a forced attempt of comfort, or maybe something genuine- whatever Susie intended. 

After another moment though, Kris painfully winced in a short forwards flinch. They drew in a sharp breath along with it. 

“Are you alright??” Susie eyed them concerningly. Kris gripped the blanket below them with both hands, concealing some of the pain. 

“Chest pains… I get them. Sometimes.” They somewhat struggled to say through the ache. Kris wasn’t entirely lying. They did get chest pains, but only when they weren’t with their soul for too long. The stings were violent, but rare. Sometimes it’d occasionally wake them up in the middle of the night. There was even a time Toriel had checked on them, although Kris made it out to be a bad dream. 

“Damn, I thought heart-burn was for like- old people.” Susie thought aloud. Although Kris was still in some pain, the comment managed to get a short snicker out of them.

“I don’t have heart-burn. ” they replied lightheartedly. But then a worse pain stung. Kris folded forward, grasping at their rib cage. It felt like their actual heart was going to tear itself apart. Susie looked back at them, quickly becoming alerted.

“Kris, dude, are you sure those are normal for- chest pains ? Whatever it is?” She spoke, unsure if her tone should stay lighthearted or not. There was no response, only another wince shortly following. “Kris,” she enunciated more concernedly.

“It’ll go away,” They managed to whisper. “Sorry.”

“Hey, no, It’s completely fine, I just need to know if I should call a doctor or not.” She acquiesced. Kris shook their head no. 

After a second, Kris gave up on whatever they were putting effort into, leaning sideways and letting their head fall onto Susie’s pillow. They turned to lay on their back- hands still against their rib cage. It seemed as if the pain had somewhat started to subside, but Kris definitely still seemed to be in a struggle.

Susie had noticed Kris’s bangs had parted enough to see one of their eyes pretty decently- giving even more light to their pained, slightly frustrated expression. The slight twitches of their brow, the dark contrast of their eyebags, the thinnest coat of sweat- now that Susie came to think of it, Kris appeared to be physically ill more often than not in the light world.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to… call someone?” She began to break a sweat over the situation. 

“Can you just… water, please.” Kris mumbled. Susie hurried, admittedly quicker than she needed to.

She came back with a water bottle and straw not a minute later. Kris hummed a thanks, and began to take some small sips while Susie sat on the side of the bed close to them. She twiddled her thumbs impatiently.

There wasn’t any talk for a long moment, although Susie constantly wanted to ask Kris if they were okay. 

Kris lied there for a moment after the pain had gone away, at least the majority of it. Although the buzzing air conditioner and singular bright ceiling light could make anyone feel like they were in a doctor’s office if they closed their eyes long enough, something about Susie’s room seemed oddly comforting to Kris. Susie certainly didn’t lie about the bed being comfortable for starters, but that wasn’t quite it. Maybe it was because it wasn’t their room. It lacked flair, but it didn’t feel empty. It was someone else’s room; someone they trusted. Kris then thought to themself a question. They turned their head to the side, eyeing the blank wall across the room for creases or dents- anything so they wouldn’t meet eyes with Susie while they spoke. 

“Do you trust me?” They asked low, but clear. Their breath was steady now. Susie looked to Kris, noticing a calm in their distant eyes she never commonly got to fix her gaze on.

“How couldn’t I?” she laughed. Kris’s eyes shifted in doubtful thought as a response.

“Do you…” Kris began, slower and less confident, “ever feel like- like there’s something inside of you… some instinct or- or set path you have to follow? As if you have no… control in the end?” They held onto the cloth of their sweater by their chest, not in physical pain anymore, but perhaps a mental shadow of it. “And at that point, you can’t… you can’t trust yourself anymore?” Their voice had fallen almost to a whisper. Susie hadn’t prepared for such a question, but she knew an answer certainly.

“Wow,” she scoffed after a second, “To be honest… you kind of nailed it on the dot.” She chuckled awkwardly. “I’m not really… one to talk about, like, emotional stuff , but I think I get what you mean.” She sighed, thinking. Susie shifted more onto the bed, sitting criss-cross and angling herself more towards Kris. “I kind of… moved around a lot when I was a kid.” She began with a more solemn expression growing. “But the place I stayed for the longest before coming here, well, I hated it a lot… It was almost all humans there. Which of course, no offense, but, y’know. I already had trouble making friends in the other places, but it was even worse there. I guess it was pretty similar to your situation… I guess in the end though, I grew up being told that I was hateful, or creepy, or evil, you know… just what a ‘monster’ was or… whatever. ” Her words grew softer for a moment.

a short silence was filled by a electrical unit whirring to a start in the walls. A filler sound. Susie shifted in her seat.

“But I guess I didn’t know that I could be something else.” She continued. “So I became what they already assumed I was. It was… easier for everyone involved…it controlled me. But, a lot of things changed when I moved here. Or, when I met, you , and stuff.” She muttered the last sentence. “Since then, I’ve realized a lot of things about myself, and how I grew up, and… not a lot of it was, well, favorable. I didn’t really know kindness until it was shown to me. But now I kind of feel… good? Like, good about myself? It sounds really stupid, but…” she smiled softly to herself, staring at the floor. “I have you to thank. for a lot of it I mean. So I guess I do trust myself now, if that kind of answers your question.” She finished talking with a warmer feeling in her chest. She did wonder as to why Kris had asked the question to begin with. “…Do you feel that way?” She looked at them.

Kris, over everything else, wanted to tell Susie the truth. They needed to tell her, but they knew it would never make sense out loud. There were so many strange feelings and thoughts that came with what appeared to be some sort of interdimensional possession, but none of it was near explainable. 

Kris knew they couldn’t trust themselves fully when out of control, but, somewhere , in their real heart they had a feeling. A feeling that gave them a little hope, that maybe , if they’d done something terrible out of their control, the truth would come out. But in total, they were doubtful.

“I trust you , Susie.”

Kris placed their hand over Susie’s. In a way, it was more of a desperate act than a confession. 

Susie had froze; her face completely flushed as Kris stared at the hand they held. They still couldn’t dare meet Susie’s expression.

“Um, you’re-…” Susie felt beyond embarrassed at her lack of words, “right. Yeah… thanks.” She tried to smile like normal.

Kris brought her hand up to their own face, then pressed Susie’s hand against their cheek.

At the touch, Susie’s skin felt hot. All Susie could manage was a muttering ‘um’, she felt like an idiot. One million things could be said at the moment, yet she couldn’t manage a word. 

Kris then closed their eyes, but their expression didn’t seem entirely at peace. They drew their thumb across Susie’s hand, claiming a more melancholic look.

“ …I’m afraid… ” they whispered sorely as their brows furrowed. “If something were to happen… and I wouldn’t be able to…to stay…” the words quivered so slightly at the edge of their lips. They faltered to continue. “To stay good .” they uttered. Susie struggled to respond, after noticing Kris had shed a tear when they spoke.

“...If what were to happen?”

Kris barely opened their eyes, then for the first time in the conversation, Kris looked at her. It almost shocked Susie; how much emotion could be conveyed in one look, let alone from Kris . Yet somehow, that look said everything she needed to know. 

“Susie…” Kris began, weaker than ever, “If I ever hurt you,…” they brought Susie’s hand to their lips, then pressed softly, lingering there for a moment after. "Don't forgive me.”

Susie felt Kris’s warm breath on their hand in such vicinity; It contradicted the colder words. Although Kris had just shown Susie a form of affection she’d not once gotten, her brows couldn’t help but furrow at a statement so unfair.

“…How couldn’t I?” She professed, almost hurt by it. Kris then smiled, lovingly, save a dejected tone behind it.

“Right…How couldn’t you…” they weakly echoed in return.

there was that look again. That look Susie couldn’t bare anymore. Those eyes that peered so intensely, yet felt so delicate and personal when latched onto someone. 

Susie’s hand slipped from Kris’s face to their shoulder, then quickly She pulled them up into a hug. A short gasp escaped Kris, but not long after, they accepted. Kris slowly lifted their arms and brought them around her back. Their hands lingered on the comforting fabric of Susie’s jacket, then after they began to shake, Kris finally grasped at the cloth. They suddenly held as much as one person could for their life. 

Much like when Susie had helped them up earlier, they hadn’t realized just how small Kris actually was until then. Usually, they seemed to be more than they were; either with big armor or baggy clothes. With Susie now wrapped around their torso, she realized they were so… fragile. Though, they seemed contempt being consumed entirely by the monster’s warmth. 

Kris had dug their head into Susie’s shoulder. They smelled the faint laundry detergent on her clothes, and some of her hair had fallen in front, allowing their cheek to press against the curly silk. It felt all too right in her arms- like sitting at the TV again, with their mom, and dad, and brother. It felt like home; How things used to be. How everything used to feel. When things were good .

Susie felt Kris shutter and their shoulders twitched up. It was all silent, but Susie knew they had begun to cry. All she could do was hold on tighter. 

“I don’t know why you think you’d ever hurt me or anything like that, but if you did,” Susie said, pressing her head closer to Kris. “I’d forgive you a million times over, dumbass… you don’t have to worry.”

In the embrace, Kris coughed suddenly. Then again. To Susie, it had seemed to be their crying growing more intense as they buried in her shoulder, but after a second, Kris seemed to freeze. After a moment, they unconfidently parted the hug, staring down and away from Susie. Slowly, with a tremble, they covered their mouth. For a split second they seemed to observe their hand again before bringing it back, silently.

“…Kris? What is it?…”

Chapter Text

Kris coughed harder into their hand, trying to turn their head further down and away. They stayed there, unable to react. Their other hand firmly gripped the fabric of their pants anxiously.

Susie tried to see Kris’s face, but they turned further. “Kris!” she exclaimed with a worried frustration. She reached out to their shoulder, yet paused when she noticed something at the base of her own shirt; fresh red drops of blood. It wasn’t hers. She looked up terrified, then after a fearful hesitation, turned Kris by the shoulders to face towards her. Susie’s expression dropped.

Though Kris pressed shakingly hard against their mouth, red had seemed to line between their fingers; staining the skin. “Move your hand,” Susie said. It sounded like more of a command, given how worried she’d become.

After a moment of darting eyes desperately at the floor, at a loss, Kris ashamedly removed their hand, which had mostly been tainted around the palm. Their mouth hung open just barely- revealing their white teeth mixing and seeping into the maroon. The blood sinked into all the cracks on their lips, and smudged around the corners of their mouth.

They looked as if they were trying to speak- trying to come up with a messy excuse, but the evidence was plain and sanguinary. There was a distant muffled rumble: the sound of storm clouds approaching.

“I need to go home.” Kris spilled, abruptly shifting to get off of the bed.

“Wait! Kris, you can’t just-!” Susie grabbed onto their arm tighter than she should’ve.

“Please-”

“You don’t need to go home, you need to go to the hospital!”

“That wouldn’t fix this,"

“Then what the hell aren’t you telling me?!” Susie snapped. The corners of Kris’s mouth jumped down in a wince. So quickly had Susie forgotten Kris’s frailness. With a sudden guilt, she let go of their arm. It most likely left the area pale. Kris sighed unsteadily.

“I can’t tell you right now, I- I just have to go.” they hurried to stand up. They managed a step forward, but then their balance faltered. Susie got to Kris just as their eyes rolled back. She caught them easily. Kris hadn’t entirely lost consciousness. They pushed against Susie, disjointedly trying to regain footing. “I need to… by myself,” they brokenly muttered out of focus, eyeing the door.

“Kris, it doesn’t matter what it is, you don’t have to do any of this by yourself!” Susie refuted. “At least let me help,” she pleaded. Kris took a few costly breaths as the quiet patter of rain began to echo around the building. They sighed unsteadily.

“Then take me home. To my room.” They said wearily. Susie seemed hesitant. Kris then lifted their heavy head enough to look at her. “…Do you trust me?…”

Susie bit the insides of her cheek, then nodded. Her expression grew determined.

———

The entrance of the Dreemur household burst open, and the sound of heavy rain and thunder became clear. Susie stepped in, holding Kris in her arms with ease. She had been holding them for the majority of the way there, although Kris had opposed at first. Now, they clung to Susie like a child after a long car ride. They were adorned with her big jacket. Susie never cared about the rain anyway. Nonetheless, the two of them were drenched.

A few warm lights were on in the place, contrasting the outside’s greyness. Toriel didn’t seem to be home. Either that or she was napping.

After slamming the door shut with her foot, Susie hurried towards Kris’s room. She was clearly on a mission.

“Ok so what happens when we get to your room?” Susie asked as she began to walk up the stairs.

“You’ll see…” they whispered.

“Right,” Susie responded half-heartedly. She was getting tired of the ominous messages. When she got to the door and opened it, she didn’t see anything until…

“Kris is that— your soul?!” She sputtered.

“Just let me lay down first,” Kris peeped, too tired to address her surprise. After eyeing the soul in the cage a moment more, Susie obliged and laid Kris down on the bed.

“Do you want me to- like, put your soul back??” She stressed.

“Just hand it to me.”

In the corner of the room where the soul lay contained, Susie kneeled, and opened the small door of the cage. It glowed faintly, saturated by a red brighter than blood. She faltered before taking it. Seeing it so up-close, it was almost entrancing. She took it carefully, treating it light as a baby bird, and brought it to them.

“Um- Now what?” She waited nervously for instruction. Kris held out their hand. “Oh- ok,” she handed it to them. This all felt like she shouldn’t be seeing this, but she kept watching.

Kris grabbed the soul rather tightly, then seemed to eye Susie shortly with an indiscernible emotion. Maybe a kind one. Then, they looked away and shoved the soul to their chest. It disappeared as Kris jolted, administering the drug. Susie caught herself flinch. An audible exhale escaped Kris as they sat up. It was the kind of gasp that only happened when abruptly submerged in cold water.

“Are you- did it work??” Susie blurted. Kris didn’t reply for a moment, just sitting there.

“Yes.” They finally said.

It was subtle, yet it felt obvious to Susie. From that one word, Kris sounded so… different then. There was something off about the whole thing. She sighed with some relief nonetheless.

“Okay…um… I’ll be right back.” Susie stepped back, momentarily unsure if she should look away from them. She left the room. Kris heard her footsteps grow quieter.

Although they had gotten their soul back, Kris didn’t feel replenished at all. They only felt like they weren’t gonna die anymore. Kris shifted their feet off of the bed, and rested them on the floor.

Thunder rolled on nearby, and the hollow pattering against the roof felt familiar as ever. It grew in volume. Kris used to enjoy listening to the rain. Now, whenever they were alone and not distracting themself, they’d begin to hear that ringing. It was incessant- almost taunting. It was one of the reasons they couldn’t sleep with the soul inhabiting them.

Kris felt the dampened sleeve of Susie’s jacket; reminiscent, longingly.

Susie entered the room once again and shut the door behind her. She’d gotten face wipes from the bathroom.

“…You still have some, like, blood on your face and hand, or whatever.” She spoke ungainly. Susie went and sat next to them, opening the package. She pulled out a wipe and presented it. “Do you wanna…?” But Kris barely reacted. Susie searched for their eyes through their wet bangs for some indicator, but couldn’t find them for the life of her.

She sighed shortly, “here, give me your hand.” She spoke in a calmer manner. Kris showed their hand. It was stained even after encountering the heavy rain. Along with the rest of their body language, the posture of Kris’s hand just seemed… empathetically weak. Susie took it, lightly, and began to draw the wipe across.

Although the blood was stubborn, Susie found the patience to tend to every crease it stuck in.

“…Sorry I kind of grabbed your wrist like that earlier.” She said. Her eyes were focused on the work in front of her. “I think I’ve always gotten mad when I’m confused like that… or worried… I guess.” She took Kris’s index finger, and began to go section by section. She seemed so attentive. “But, sometimes it’s hard for me when I’m not told the whole deal.” She switched to their middle finger. “I mean, it’s not your fault, it’s just-… whenever there’s some sort of sudden change, and I’m left out and…” Susie paused, eyes darting away in thought. She sighed, then continued to clean their hand. “I don’t know…”

———

After Susie was done, she continued to stare at Kris’s hand. She grazed her thumb slowly across the clean slate of their palm; stuck in the finished product. When she embarrassedly caught herself staring, she looked back up to Kris, but they seemed as if nothing intimate had happened at all. They still stared at the floor, seemingly in their own mind. Susie wondered if they’d heard her apology at all.

“…There’s still blood on your face,” she added to the silence, then shuffled for another wipe. “Do you want, um, me to do it, or something?”

After a moment, Kris tilted their head to her. They didn’t reach for the wipe, they just… waited in an unconfident manner. Susie still couldn’t see their eyes. She hoped Kris couldn’t see hers.

She started to dot around the corners of their mouth with a single hand, but found her other hand holding around Kris’s jawline for better precision. She tried to push away the thought of how admirably soft their skin was after the rain.

she wasn’t entirely sure if it was a tear, or water from Kris’s hair, but Susie watched a drop run down the side of their face. She wiped it away with her thumb.

Once she’d gotten most of the blood off, she looked at their dry lips, which still had remnants. She wondered if the cracks and subtly branchy patterns were from a picking habit.

Nervously, she drew the wipe on the edge of their bottom lip; revealing teeth and gum. Her eyes subtly lit up- there was some sort of subconscious need to absorb every little detail she could. Then on its own, her free hand slowly slid up Kris’s face, and lifted their damp bangs up and back. Susie parted her mouth, just barely. She stared at them.

“Kris…you’re not the same like this… are you?”

Their eyes widened.

“What?” Kris’s mouthed with little air escaping. Their heart beat quicker in their chest. Susie continued to stare at them, taking note of the reaction. Kris felt her breath.

“That’s why you said all of that earlier…You’re not…” she spoke closely with the realization, “you’re not in contr-”

Kris covered Susie’s mouth. Their eyes darted between hers in an almost fearful plea.

Though shocked at first, Susie eventually understood. Her shoulders lowered, and then she backed away from their face.. She tucked part of Kris’s bangs behind their ear before fully letting go, so she could still see one of their eyes- Their miserable, utterly exhausted eyes. She needed to know what they felt.

Kris’s expression lingered on Susie’s, before a guilt overcame them. Their gaze shifted down.

They reached for the collar of the jacket Susie had lent, and began to slip it off. Susie watched. The jacket was then piled neatly in Kris’s lap. They seemed contemplative about something in the far depths or their mind.

Susie didn’t know what to say, because, if anything, what could be said? What could be done? There wasn’t a way for her to understand.

“Kris…” is all that managed to leave her.

“You should go home now.” They suddenly spoke with decisive, yet breaking words. Susie’s brows furrowed.

Kris’s hands tightened around her jacket, as if to not let go. But ultimately, and rather abruptly, they held it out for Susie to take back.

“Kris—”

They shoved the cloth into her hands, then looked at Susie with wide eyes.

“Please. Leave.” They commanded. Now, Kris looked worse than when Susie had found them at the beginning of the day. A bead of sweat rolled down the side of their face. What were they fighting?

Susie held the jacket tighter, then got up from her seat. The next moment she looked to Kris, they appeared to be looking down at the floor again. Silent. She put on her jacket making her way to the door, yet stopped before turning the knob. She tilted her head Kris’s way, but not entirely.

“I… trust you.” Susie enunciated. Then she left, shutting the door softly behind her.

———

A short moment had passed. Kris gaped at the door with a shuttering breath. Their chest began to rise and fall, quicker and quicker. A deeply-rooted anger began to boil in the back of their sore throat. That soul. That noise. The helplessness. Pushing their friends away. lying. starving.

Kris slipped off of the bed onto their knees. They coiled over, bringing their trembling hands to their head. They pulled at their hair- almost digging nails into their scalp, as their breath slowly shaped into audible, quiet, yet visceral noise.

“I hate you!!” Kris lashed, finally forcing above a whisper. They didn’t care what the consequences were if they took out that soul again.

Without hesitance, Kris lunged their hand into their chest, and grabbed the soul. Guttural shouts left them as they pulled, tryingly, for their freedom. One last yank finally got it out; ripping a barbed bandaid. A deep silence followed; save for their heavy breaths.

Something felt wildly rewarding about holding that thing in their hands. In like a light-headed high, Kris stared with an indescribable expression. The soul was now trapped. The soul was now helpless, caged in their hand. Kris squeezed, then harder, but a sudden pain struck them when they did. They loosened their hold, and felt new blood begin to drip out of their nose. Kris stood up, and shoved the thing back in its cage. They sighed heavily, then looked at the door. A guilt still overwhelmed them.

———

Susie swore she didn’t mind the rain. She swore it. But it was getting in her face, and the sidewalk was slippery, and everything in the world seemed wrong.

“What am I supposed to do, huh?” She retorted her own thoughts aloud as she walked. Thunder distantly responded, and the rain picked up. Susie huffed, continuing on. But then, she heard her name, distantly. She turned back.

“Susie!!” The voice repeated. It was Kris. They kept running toward her with shoes slapping hard against the wet concrete. As they advanced, Susie stood there, confused and concerned.

Kris slowed to a stop, before stumbling toward her. They grabbed the collar of Susie’s jacket to support themself.

“What are you- why are you out here??” Susie exclaimed, helping them by the shoulders. “Are you- bleeding again??”

“I…” they struggled to speak between catching their breath. “You were right… you’re right. That wasn’t…”

“Dude, just take a second, it’s okay-”

“I’m sorry” they continued despite Susie’s words, “I’m so sorry…” They looked up to her. The blood that had been running from their nose danced with the fresh rain on their face. Susie grew more concerned. “I-I’ll tell you everything, I promise, I just- I just—”

After the dam of words failed to keep back their cries, Kris couldn’t help but break down in front of her. They felt pathetic doing so for a second time.

“Kris… come here.” Susie cooed, holding out her arms. “I can’t just watch you cry like that.” She sighed.

Like an injured child, Kris steadily moved into the hug; still hiccuping through tears. This time though, they clung weakly. They were unable to force any strength past their pouring emotions.

“You don’t have to apologize.” She added, rubbing her hand on their back. “And… I don’t need to know everything. Unless you really need to tell me. Then that’s okay.” She assured. As the precipitation continued, Susie rested her head over theirs.

Shielding the rain wouldn’t do much in the end, but the act was everything to Kris.