Chapter Text
Ted can't believe they put in overtime for this shit. "Government job" they said, "cushy position" they said. Load of crock. For the amount of work piled on their desk, they expected more than fifteen an hour and the honor of getting to drive home at the ass crack of dawn. In the rain, even.
The radio was playing some late 90s garbage, same background noise they'd heard all through high school, just barely audible over the sound of the storm hitting their window. Can't believe this is what I'm wasting my twenties on, they thought to themselves. Work for the government and its barely even a desk job, should've known selling your soul to the feds wouldn't be worth it.
Between the rain and the overwhelming mental whirlpool of "fuck this shit", they honestly couldn't believe they even heard when their car hit a bump. A loud bump. What? How, this couldn't be a deer, they would have seen that. Even a rabbit running out in front would've been noticeable, what the hell would just be laying in the street like that? Swerving the car onto the side of the rode, they put it in park and flicked the emergency lights.
"Fuuuuuck, do I really wanna get out in this rain right now?" They leaned back, letting their head hit the seat. Not only was it a downpour, it was dark. This could be risking becoming roadkill themselves. It was probably just a tree branch, or something... But... What if it was alive? What if it was hurt, left to die in agony out here in the rain? What if they could help.
"Urrgghh", they ground their teeth. Why'd mom have to teach me to be kind to animals? This could've been way easier if they were just an asshole. Tucking their bleeding heart back up their sleeve where it belonged, they braced themselves for rain... And swung open the car door.
Yeah, this sure sucked alright. The rain immediately drenched their suit, and it weighed them down as the heavy fabric clung to their body, but they'd survive. Peering around the front bumper, they saw exactly what they feared. Some kind of animal... But nothing like they'd seen before. Maybe a cat? It's ears were pointed, and curved towards each other- but it was too big for a cat, roughly the size of a small child. Proportions were all wrong to any sort of animal, it's long torso implied some sort of bipedal build- almost like...
Oh fuck, they hit a cryptid. Maybe the first person to ever find a cryptid, and they hit it with their car, holy shit. If they didn't work for the government, they'd probably have been disappeared by now- or, shit, maybe it'll be worse because they work for the government. They've gotta get this thing out of here, nobody can find it.
Crouching down, they tried to get a better look. Good thing they left the headlights on, they shined right on the thing, and yikes, was it not a looker. Big, tan flat face, like some sort of pug got stretched like taffy, with one side already half necrotized by the look of it. It was not doing good.
It's fist was clenched, little clawed paws curled in with a tension unlike a dead body... Maybe rigor mortis, already? It was necrotizing, who knows. But then- it moved. It grabbed them.
Memories of every horror movie Ted had ever watched in their life flashed through their mind in a montage- rainy night, side of the road, monster, eats me, I'm going to die, is this really it? The shock almost knocked them off their feet where they crouched, flying backwards onto their ass- almost, because it caught them. The hand gripping their wrist held on tight, deceptively strong for its size, and pulled them back up.
It had lifted it's head, eyes illuminated by the head lights soulful despite their squintiness, and in them Ted could almost see a plea. It's claws were more than sharp enough to break skin, but they didn't. The soft pad of its thumbs brushed their pulse point, and let go, it's arm falling back to its side.
Ted was gonna regret this, they knew it instantly, this wasn't just breaking off more than they could chew, this was downing the whole mouthful, but they couldn't- they couldn't just leave it here, government, G.U.N., animal control be damned.
"Hey, can you understand me?" They asked, fully kneeling into its space. They waved a hand in front of its face.
It blinked slowly, looking around as it opened its eyes wider, fully taking Ted in. Whatever this was, it seemed intelligent, to what extend, they had no clue, but it sure wasn't an animal. "I'm gonna get you out of here, okay, I'm gonna try and help. It's not like I can take you to the vet, but if you're gonna die, I'd rather you do it out of the rain, okay?"
Not bothering to wait for an answer, they gathered it up, one shoulder at a time, and hoisted it into their arms. Heavy fucking thing, felt like dead lifting cinder blocks, but Ted could manage. Crab walking, they took one big step at a time, nudging the back door open with an elbow against the door handle. They slid him in, laying across the back seat, and swung themselves back into their chair. Were they equipped to handle this? No. Did they know what they were getting themselves into? Fuck no. But it sure beat whatever pattern of dead end job to nonexistent home life balance they'd been doing up until now.
Maybe I might not matter to G.U.N., but I sure could matter to this little guy, they thought. Turning the key in the ignition, they put their foot to the gas pedal. They guess they're having company over, tonight.